Chapter Text
The reindeer dropped the beaker on the floor, breaking it into pieces.
He cursed to himself as he scrambled to pick up the mess he made. While he considered taking out a new one, he found himself retracting the movement to do so in the very same succession. Surrendering with a sigh, he flopped down onto the patient's bed and rubbed his cloves into his eyes.
He had not been ready for it.
It had been a night like any other on Sunny, and nothing stood out about it. In fact, everything had been so normal that evening that fate must have chosen it on purpose to be ironic. Fate had made the waters calm, the waves gently cradling the ship in its deep blue bosom, ensuring that there would be no risk of a storm tonight, despite how the old sayings went.
Everyone had been so entranced by the beautiful twilight composition in the night sky, that all of them had decided to have dinner outside. As usual, Sanji doted on Nami and Robin, bringing their meals first and foremost with resounding praises of their beauty, while everyone else had been given theirs routinely and casually. Zoro hogged the booze like he usually did, Brook was performing a new song which they all sang along to, Luffy tried to be his usually impulsive self by betting Usopp and Chopper that he could throw himself from the back to the front of the ship in one go, only to be reprimanded by Nami that it was reckless and he could fall into the water. Franky and Robin made small talk, they all laughed, drank, and generally just had a good time bonding with each other as a crew.
…there had been bonding going on, alright.
He blamed it all on the atmosphere, because he knew that if the night hadn't been so… normal, he possibly could have sensed what was coming and wouldn't have been as shocked as he got.
It was after Chopper had assisted Sanji with the dishes; he jumped off the counter and went outside. There were only Luffy and Zoro left, talking by the tree in the middle of Sunny, with the captain asking his right hand man if he could borrow his swords, to which he was responded with a cold and flat "no" as Zoro took a swig of his beer. The rubber man tried to stubbornly argue that he was his captain giving him an order, which didn't faze the swordsman at all as he kept refusing. Chopper rolled his eyes at the meaningless quarrel and ran along the side to the ship, on the way to his doctor's cabin.
The worst decision he's ever made thus far, despite his choice of path being a regular occurrence.
At first, he didn't really pay that much mind to it; Usopp and Nami were simply standing by the rail and chatting about something. However, for some reason, the mammal drew himself back to try to hide himself (unsuccessfully, as we all know) behind the corner he'd just passed. It was barely audible for him to make out what they were saying.
"Why aren't you gonna charge me for it?" Chopper heard Usopp ask suspiciously.
"Are you surprised?" Nami questioned back, nudging him with her mug of beer.
"Yes." The marksman didn't hesitate to answer. Chopper took note that they weren't their usual tense selves, which was probably due to the alcohol. It was the only time they were ever completely at ease, which is why it wasn't surprising they tried to indulge in it any chance they took.
"Well, you're off the hook. I think I owe ya that much considering the new upgrade y'gave my staff." Nami tried to shift herself but ended up stumbling a bit before turning herself around so she was standing with her back to the sea.
"Wait a sec… you're insinuating that you're indebted to me." The sniper was still skeptical of her sudden generosity.
"Why's it so weird?! Stop being… you know…" she unsuredly gestured to all of him "so… you."
"What'd'ya mean?" Usopp peeked with one eye into his own mug that had been empty for some time. Chopper could draw the conclusion that both were slightly flushed, but not to the point of being drunk. The reindeer wondered if Nami was purposely playing up her tipsiness for whatever reason.
"I mean… after two years you had to come back looking like… like that. Showin' yourself off. I-I'm only a woman. It's not my fault." The navigator was chewing on her lip as she seemed to be admiring the view… and it wasn't the sea. Her head was tilted and she was unabashedly staring right at his chest, hitting subtlety with a bag of bricks.
Chopper could have imagined it, but he swore Usopp's face got slightly darker, as he wasn't used to hearing that kind of praise from anyone… least of all her.
"I… I don't know what to say to that…" Usopp stuttered, his eyes flickering nervously.
"Heheh… aww…" Nami hiccupped, putting the mug down on the deck. Suddenly, she just threw herself into his arms, shocking him and almost making him topple over due to the abrupt force of the pounce. He managed to steady himself by holding on to her and let the momentum spin them around in a circle, appearing as though they were waltzing for a moment.
"Why're ya bein' like that?" She grinned at him, probing his reluctance.
"I-if you're just joking, this isn't funny…" Usopp attempted sternly as he entailed his words by pulling on her wrists to undo the entanglement around his neck.
Nami wasn't smiling anymore; in a split second having transformed her expression into a serious frown.
"Who says I'm joking?" For a moment it seemed like she'd sobered up in an instant, as if to convince him of her honesty. "Unlike you, I'm not a liar." The red-haired woman grabbed his head and pulled him to her level, staring him straight in the eye. "Eyes are windows to the soul; expose my lies, Usopp."
They stood in that awkward position for brief, Nami glaring daggers into his gaze, but to Chopper's surprise, Usopp didn't seem scared of her. He simply looked back at her with equal intensity, as if accepting her challenge. The navigator's glance cast between his lips and his eyes, shimmering with want.
What happened next caused Chopper's inner turmoil from then to the present time.
Usopp worked out the crystal clear hint and kissed her full on the mouth, which she fully accepted without a moment's hesitation. As if learning the steps to a new dance they'd just conjured, their hands got curious and sought skin; her own over his pecs, his over her smooth waist.
Chopper gulped as his eyes fixated on the pair; not knowing whether to leave or to stay. In fact, not really thinking of either. Or anything. He stood frozen on the spot.
The sharpshooter picked the hellcat up and put her on the ship rails as they were still in the midst of their rushing hormones, their movements clumsy and heavy-handed, signaling their inexperience in these kinds of affairs. Nami let out a tiny whine, her heart beating probably as vigorously as the one she felt under her palm.
Usopp's thumb was caressing her cheek as he withdrew from her lips, Nami's hands wound up around the back of his neck. They panted for a bit, their foreheads touching which made Usopp's nose brush up against her cheek.
"I… I'm sorry… if I… you just looked so- I… I don't know why I-…" The sniper breathed, their pores becoming hypersensitive to human touch. The alcohol was just an additional intoxication.
"You don't have to know… Just feel me." She smiled up at him, "The way you're holding me… feels oddly honest."
"Don't be so sure you're gonna get used to something like that from me." He squinted his eyes with a smirk, pulling her closer so they were barely hugging. It felt warmer that way.
"Unless you lied just now."
They gave a start before howling laughter ruptured from them both; this startled Chopper into sense, which enabled his unheeded escape to his quarters.
This had happened just yesterday.
He didn't get even a wink last night, so he knew he hadn't dreamt it. It had actually happened.
Usopp and Nami had kissed.
If something like that could happen, then surely anything was possible in this crazy world.
Both of them had known each other longer than Chopper has known either of them, so there must have been some sort of tension growing between them from the beginning. Maybe it was something that had to be observed from the moment of conception to truly understand, or he was just making excuses for his naiveté.
He had just always looked up to them as his older siblings, so seeing them together romantically was just a bit… weird. Even if the logical part of him tried to reason that they were in fact just crew members without any blood ties to one another, his emotions still couldn't negate his initial gag reflex.
Staring up at the ceiling for a long time made him get it.
What had actually bothered him the most about it wasn't the kiss itself… it was his own lack of composure in how to deal with the news. You can't ask that much of him. He was the youngest crew member, heck, he was just a little reindeer! How in the world was he supposed to handle such a big thing on his own?
Maybe he wouldn't have to…
Yet… it didn't feel right to rat them out. At least not until they'd settled into their domestic life, and his own mind had fit itself into it. Usopp and Nami being a couple… holding hands… being cuddly… maybe marrying… having a…
A…
He turned pale.
He didn't want to think about it. Anything but think about it. But he had to stare the possibility right in the face and swallow. He was the only doctor on the ship. It was his responsibility, not just as a doctor, but as a friend. He had to roll with the tides, whatever would happen. After all, there was no room for lamenting his subjective opinion if he could try to focus on it with a scholarly eye.
Jumping off the bed he headed for the bookcase and browsed his medical library. Once one book caught his interest he began skimming through it with flippant care, not planning to study deeply for now but wanting to have an idea what he was looking for.
Humans mated for life; at least that's what most synopses informed him of in his books. So did that mean they had…
…no. No, no, no. Stop thinking about it like that! Not only was it unbecoming of himself, he was also looking way too far into the future. It was a progress, he had to give it time. Whether it would get the expected ending or not was irrelevant. All he could do in the meantime was prepare for the probability; read up on what to expect and how to handle it professionally would the time come.
Chopper snorted. Professionally.
In the moment, that was the last thing he felt like being despite himself.
Then, a careful knock disturbed his thoughts.
"I SURRENDER!" The reindeer yelled with his arms up in the air, absolutely terrified. The door opened.
"Good morning, doctor. Am I bothering you?" the historian entered the room with an inscrutable smile. Despite the mysterious aura from her encompassing the lab, Chopper always felt oddly at ease when in her presence.
"Oh, Robin! Hi." He hid his steadily diminishing agitation and feigned a smile. "What brings you?"
"It's breakfast. No one could find you in the men's sleeping quarters, so we assumed you were in the room of your element. I volunteered to get you."
"Oh… oh!" The doctor hastily tucked the book back into the shelf. "Yeah, I'm coming."
Robin cast him a gaze that lingered on him for a little too long, but still maintaining a sense of fondness, as she left the door ajar.
Ignoring that scrutinizing look was best for now. Maybe all he needed was breakfast to restart his mental engine.
Just like the previous night, nothing about the tenor in the kitchen stood out; the heavenly aroma of Sanji's cooking lingering still, tempting those still hungry. Half the crew had left, leaving behind Luffy, Usopp and Sanji, the former two seeming to have some sort of eating contest, what with their mouths completely stuffed with eggs benedict.
"Oi! Shitheads! Stop wolfing it all down! Food is meant to be savored!" Sanji yelled at the two, taking a swig of his cigarette before his rolled-up sleeved arms resumed washing the remnants of the morning get-together.
"Also, eating too fast increases the risk of insulin-resistance, choking, metabolic syndrome and obesity, to name a few." Chopper instinctively added as he entered the room. Luffy paused and stared at him, as if to imply he had absolutely no clue what he was talking about.
Sanji nodded approvingly at the reindeer without turning around. "Thanks for your sanitary input, Chopper! I was getting tired of dealing with these two idiots on my own."
The doctor smiled lightly until his eyes met Usopp's, at which point he immediately looked away accompanied by an uneasy tingle in his stomach. Fortunately for him, the former barely took notice of his change in demeanor.
"Oi, Chopper! Could you tell Luffy that he's cheating?! He obviously uses his gum power to his advantage!"
"Am not! It's part of me! I can't just leave it at the door whenever I want! That's like telling a fast person to run slower!"
"Well, I deserve a handicap on the timer at least!"
Luffy squinted, his eyes grouchily on the sniper. In the blink of an eye, the marksman's plate was empty, but not because of his own speed; the captain had simply taken all the food from his plate with his bare hands and shoved it into his mouth before running off, hands covering his chops. Usopp took off after him in fret, which left behind Chopper and Sanji to clean up their mess.
The youngest crew member sighed tiredly as he gathered the remaining dishes to give to the cook. Chopper felt uncomfortable looking him in the eye as well, pondering whether it was a good idea to tell him about what he saw. Once again, as before, that thought ended quickly with a thick-lettered "no". Not only didn't he want Usopp to get hurt by the chef's impending (and unjustified) wrath, he didn't want to tend to his injuries with this newfound awkwardness he felt whenever he saw him. Unlike his long-nosed friend, he wasn't a good liar. It would only be a matter of time until he was asked too many unpleasant questions.
There was only one option he had, and it was to simply get better at bluffing.
He might as well start digging his grave now. How in the world would that be possible for him?
"Something on your mind, Chopper?" Asked the cook. It pulled him out of his worrisome reflections, evident by his furrowing eyebrows.
"No, just…" He might not be able to tell Sanji about what he saw, but there were other things he could ask that wouldn't give too much away. "Have you noticed anything strange about Nami recently?" Surely Nami couldn't be that good a bluffer to fool her biggest fan.
Sanji was the perfect source of such information, and just like the ambience of these last few days, that fact didn't stick out either as he began gushing about the navigator.
"Aside from her usual enchanting, captivating self; not that I can think of."
Huh. So Nami really was that good.
"Except…"
Chopper's ears perked.
"What? Except what?" The doctor's cloves gripped the kitchen counter with a piercing gaze right into Sanji's eyes, ignoring his own dilemma for a moment. The cook was startled by his reaction, which must've been why he stumbled a little on his words. Man, he really had to get better at the arts of deception, or he'd be busted sooner than intended.
"W-well… She had been standing watch tonight, so I expected her to come down to breakfast in an understandably tired, sour mood. Of course I put extra effort into making the food re-energizing befitting a lady such as herself after such an exhausting task, but as she descended the stairs, she seemed rather… happy… and… humming to herself."
Chopper had been re-evaluating his memories in the back of his mind, surmising that he had been going crazy and that he might have imagined the previous night after all, especially since nothing about the circumstances on the ship had changed. But that piece of information put those doubts to eternal rest; it didn't sound like her usual self even a little. Not saying she was never happy or anything, but after night watching it was hard to imagine one would be in a chipper mood, especially Nami.
"I assumed she had finished a difficult map and was feeling accomplished about herself. So of course I can only be happy for my dear Nami-swan." The cook swooned.
Luckily, Sanji was still none the wiser about the ordeal, wanting to interpret her behavior in his favor. It might have made the reindeer avoid suspicion this time around. It wouldn't be nearly as easy probing people like Robin for details, what with her eyes being everywhere (literally) gathering knowledge of all kinds through her insightful observations. He wouldn't even dream of trying it with her.
"Where is she now?"
"We moored the ship, so Nami-san, Robin-chan, Brook and the Moss-head went into town to restock our supplies. They should be back at noon."
Ah, well, at least he didn't have to face Nami for now. Good to know. Now he had to leave the kitchen before Sanji got too suspicious of his questions. So he began walking away-
"By the way, why are you so curious about Nami?"
Crap. A very pale Chopper quickly whipped up something from the top of his head, inevitably tripping his words along the way.
"W-well… it's just time for her check-up. Nothing special." With those parting, teetering lies, he scooted outside to deck, his near-panic in tow. That was a close call. His heart pounded away in his ribcage as a means to illuminate him that he had to be more subtle; there just wasn't another choice. His feet were aimless in where to take him, but a shout stopped them.
All his fear neutralized as soon as he ran outside on deck and saw Usopp having wrestled down Luffy in a full-on arm bar hold, to which his captain rebelled with flailing limbs. The scene was oddly funny as the rubber man could easily overthrow the marksman if he was serious enough. Instead of laughing at it, though, the reindeer simply rubbed his clove against his temple. Sometimes he wondered if he truly was the youngest on this ship.
"Admit that you were cheating!" Yelled the inventor while tightening his grip.
"NEVER!" Luffy refused loudly.
"Break it up, you two!" The mammal ran to Usopp in a futile effort to untie him from the future pirate king as he momentarily neglected his new-found complex towards the former.
"Boys will be boys, doctor-bro!" As per usual, Franky made a spectacular entrance; jumping on to deck in his trademark stance of forming a star with his cyborg arms. "You can't stop the super flow of testosterone!"
Chopper shook his head at the notion that not only was Franky very wrong about how testosterone worked, but also that he was approving of this childish display in front of them. As he lowered himself down to once again push an angry Usopp away, his eyes fell on some red spots on deck, just where Luffy was currently struggling.
"What…?"
The doctor transformed into his heavy point form to once and for all dislodge the sniper, doing so by using his forearms to grasp under Usopp's armpits. Now off, Chopper tossed the assailant a few feet away to gain a second of breathing space from him. The sharp-shooter fell back in a reverse somersault, making him hit his head against one of the barrels which damaged the top of his head with a bump.
"Ouch, what did you do that for?!" Usopp rubbed his fresh injury, grunting.
"You wouldn't stop! Can't you see he's bleeding?!" Barely a moment to spare Chopper returned to his normal form and rushed to Luffy's side for further inspection.
"Luffy, what the hell is this?! What did you do?!" The reindeer reprimanded as he now saw that the cause of his bleeding hadn't been merely Usopp's fault; cuts riddling all over the rubber man's arms, but most of the offense on his hands were pulsating blood out of their vessels of origin.
The sharp wounds had been healing, but their rough-housing had reopened them, spilling blood everywhere.
"I-I didn't do anything! I just borrowed Zoro's swords yesterday after he refused to loan them to me."
In other words, he stole them without the swordsman's say-so. As Chopper heaved in an exasperated motion, an ear perked at the sound of Usopp rising to his feet behind him. The reindeer turned around apologetically.
"Sorry for throwing you so hard, Usopp. I was just…"
"No, no, it's fine. You got worried. I get it." Usopp handwaved it as his arms crossed over his chest, rife with a look of disappointment. Although he could, like Luffy, be guilty of being too happy-go-lucky at times, his natural sense of fear made him a significantly more rational and less impulsive person than his captain.
"Gee, Luffy, you should know better than to play with Zoro's swords. Don't use things you don't know how to use; it's too dangerous."
Luffy pouted for a long bit until his face lit up, as if something had hit him.
"Can I borrow your kabuto?"
"WEREN'T YOU LISTENING?!"
Chopper stepped in-between them to stop this feud from escalating further.
"Time out!" The reindeer grabbed Luffy's hands and observed them again, carefully with the skill of a doctor's eye. "…Luckily your cuts aren't deep, but we should still treat them so they don't re-open again."
"You do that!" Franky gave a thumbs up at his crewmate's competence. "I was just going to ask if longnose-bro could help me with an upgrade for our Coup de Burst. I just looked at our WIP blueprints and got some ideas, but I'll need his super level of expertise in engineering to complete it."
Usopp scratched the back of his head with embarrassment in flattery at the shipwright's words.
"Ahh, ok." They departed, with Chopper's eyes having followed and remained at the spot they'd just left. His mind began to wander about yesterday, train of thought broken once he heard Luffy hissing from pain, and so he hurried to his task.
A while later, the captain had his wounds tended to in the Chopper's infirmary. As much as he tried to ignore it, he felt Luffy's eyes bore right into him like a drill as he tried to work. Seeing that the rubber-man hadn't come to him for treatment immediately yesterday, he discovered dirt stuck in the cuts and it gave him a mild headache. So before applying anything further, he had to clean it. Sensing the doctor's irritation Luffy became meekly suggestive at how to proceed.
"I mean, there's not much dirt, so you don't have t-"
"Dammit, Luffy, would you let the doctor do his job or what?!" Only a moment later did he realize he'd been too harsh, with his tone raising an octave higher than he'd intended. He shook his head.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Without the focus he usually maintained, his movements appeared rather scatterbrained, although he didn't make any fatal errors. Any memories, horrible or not, could never override his natural instinct for what he knew best.
Then an image of Usopp and Nami cuddling flashed into his mind, and his clove accidently added another cut to Luffy's increasing collection on his arm.
It barely fazed the captain, as just like Chopper was examining him physically, he'd returned the favor by examining his mammal friend with insight.
"…what's bothering you, Chopper?"
The question made the reindeer jump, giving a rather skittish reaction.
"It's… nothing. Just a bit…"
As though to taunt, the surreal image reappeared and toiled a grimace out of him.
"Frazzled… y'know… at the sight of your injuries."
That was the worst lie he'd ever uttered in his entire life, resisting the urge to slap himself. As a doctor, he'd seen worse, and Luffy knew as much as well. There was absolutely no shred of truth or grounds to his words even remotely.
If he got figured out now, he definitely deserved that punishment. Maybe his subconscious had been trying it on purpose, to relieve him of the stress of keeping things secret.
"When was the last time you took a break?"
Chopper almost dropped the bandages, his previous lie now a half-truth as he got genuinely frazzled.
"H-huh?"
"We know you didn't sleep. You were in your doctor's cabin all night. Lights on and all."
He just couldn't be discreet, could he?
"You always tell us to be healthy, but a doctor needs to follow that example, too."
"How do you know I wasn't sleeping in there?" Tone accusatory Chopper's scissors tore at the end of the bandage roll, completing the wrap-up as if decorating a gift.
Luffy eyed him skeptically; he might not be that sharp, but he could easily spot lies at the occasional time.
Why did it have to be one of those times? Pity overcame the reindeer at the prospect of getting caught so soon. Well, at least he didn't know the full reason for his uncharacteristic outbursts. It's what he had to settle for.
"Let's go get cotton candy!" The captain grinned with his entire face, picking up the animal and wreaking a dash outside, faster than Chopper could've accounted for.
The escalation of these occurrences, of Luffy running and jumping as he pleased, caught up to the doctor and he effused a shriek of terror. The captain just chuckled and grabbed one of the masts with his extended arm, freaking the captive out as he knew what he planned to do.
"Stop it, Luffy! Are you daft?!"
"Gum-Gum…"
"Luffy, no!"
"…Rocket!"
Chopper didn't stop screaming the entire time they were in the air, Luffy having catapulted out of the ship and onto new territory. Gravity reacted accordingly, bringing them down onto uncharted grounds and was merciless also in velocity. Luffy was trained in how to stick landings, or maybe it was due thanks to his rubber body that he was unafraid of possible harm. Nevertheless, he alit steadily, almost elegantly; no misstep or error.
The captain put an aghast reindeer down, his grin still brimming ear to ear. The mammal's fists pounded onto Luffy's legs, no short of furious at his lack of caution.
"Why can't you just walk like a normal person for once?!" Chopper cried with dismay, neglecting the irony of who it came from.
"Would you like cotton candy or not?" Luffy smiled down at him.
At the mention of his favorite treat, his anger at the captain might have subsided just an inch. After all, it was a while ago he had it and he damn well deserved it, considering what he'd gone through in just these last 24 hours.
"Sure, but can we please just walk? My body hasn't stopped shaking." The reindeer begged for mercy on his fragile heart. His eyes skewed over the sails of their ship absent-mindedly, asking a visual question to himself whether it was okay to leave. Luffy dragged his arm into the town, lending his opinion on the matter, so Chopper simply followed suit.
They walked off with the objective of finding the rest of their crewmembers' whereabouts, and additional ones; to see what the quaint town had to offer tourist-wise. It was one of the highlights of being pirates; to see the world and everything it had to offer in terms of adventure and discovery. Chopper knew he had done many stupid things, but determining to join Luffy's crew was nowhere near one of them.
It was for the wrong reasons, but in a way, Luffy was right; he needed a break.