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in a blink of an eye the summer fades away, september withers at the same time as the leaves of trees start turning orange and brown, and suddenly yoonji and jeongguk find themselves in the middle of october, surrounded by comfy outfits and halloween decorations everywhere they look.
yoonji has never been big on festivities, but she has admitted to jeongguk before that halloween is the one that she enjoys the most, simply because she likes the creepy decorations and cheap huge packs of candy at every supermarket.
jeongguk, on the other end, is big on every holiday. he likes every single one of them and lives up to celebrating with the biggest most ridiculous decorations, dragging a compliant yoonji along with him, always asking for her “expert” opinion even if they both know she couldn’t give less than a damn and that she only plays along because she knows it makes jeongguk happy.
now the way /koo/ feels about holidays…
they are not too sure how koo feels about holidays.
their general consensus has been that jeongguk’s not particularly interested in them, maybe not even aware enough of what they mean other than pretty lights and lots of family-friendly films on tv. since jeongguk’s always so excited about special days, he makes sure to stay big during them, which is why koo never sticks around enough to show any particular like or dislike.
this october things turned out a bit differently.
jeongguk doesn’t like to admit it, but the fact that this is his last year of school, and the pressure of having to hand in his thesis research in just a couple of months have him way more stressed than any of them could’ve anticipated.
logically, they both know he’s gonna do well, even jeongguk’s aware of that fact, but the whole process still makes him way too anxious, which of course means…
“what is my baby bunny watching, hm?”
koo immediately turns to look at her, pushing his phone aside to pay complete attention to his caregiver.
“mama!” he yells, delighted to see her. “mama! roro hav’ candy!” he explains, extending his arms in her direction as if asking to be picked up.
sadly, yoonji’s not strong enough to pick up such a big baby, so she does the second best thing, which is sitting next to him and pulling him in a hug.
“pororo got candy? that’s so great baby!” she humors him, lightly tickling his sides just to see the scrunch of his nose as he giggles.
“roro- roro go treat-treat, mama!” he says, picking up the phone again to show yoonji where he’s watching a pororo halloween special. “koo too? koo treat-treat?” he asks, looking at her with big excited eyes.
yoonji’s admittedly a bit taken aback by the question, since again, koo had never before shown any particular interest in this kind of thing, but she recovers quickly enough. “trick or treat,” she gently corrects him.
“trick o treat,” koo tries again, forehead scrunched because of how hard he’s focusing.
“yeah! good job, baby!” she praises. “you wanna go trick or treating like pororo?” koo immediately nods with decidedly more strength than necessary.
“now? now, go?” he asks, making an attempt at getting up before yoonji drags him down and keeps him in place over her lap, one arm safely around his waist.
she shakes her head, and koo’s smile immediately falls, being replaced by a pout. “we can’t trick or treat today, baby, we have to wait for a special day in the year when all the kids go trick or treating, if we go now people won’t know they have to get the candy ready for you!” she explains, “and also, we need to get you a costume! what do you wanna dress up as?”
“bunny!” koo immediately yells, excitement taking over his body again as he quickly forgets all about having to be patient and wait.
“of course my baby bunny would dress up as a little bun, you are gonna be the cutest in the whooole wide world!”
—
she talks about it with jeongguk once he feels big again. they go over the pros and cons of them both actually going trick-or-treating for halloween. they make plans, sketch out exactly how their night will play out, what would they do if anything went wrong, how to handle a possible tantrum outside, which is not very common in koo, but he’s also not at all used to going in public while regressed, so it’s hard to know what to expect.
jeongguk asks to take a couple of days to think about it, and yoonji of course reassures him that that’s totally okay and that the most important thing here is his comfort. she’d be more than happy to spend halloween with him no matter if he’s feeling big or small, no matter if they go out or if they just chill at home.
in the end, jeongguk decides he’s fine with trying it out, just a brief walk around the neighborhood, ringing a couple of doorbells, getting some cheap candy, and going back home to wolf it all down with yoonji.
three days before halloween they go to a theme store and get their costumes, jeongguk a gray fluffy bunny with a tail and headband included, while yoonji ends up deciding on a witch.
jeongguk had originally wanted to convince her to wear a black cat costume so they could match with the animal theme and with jeongguk’s stuffies, which are now his favorite toys, but sadly, all the cat costumes were too revealing and “sexy” for yoonji to feel comfortable wearing them outside, specially with little koo around, so the have to settle for a witch.
they have fun choosing a hat anyways.
halloween comes around soon after, maybe even too soon. jeongguk has been feeling little since the day before, so there’s no need to coax him to regress. they entertain themselves the whole day by cooking, watching halloween specials of koo’s favorite cartoons, and cuddling.
they also play with the new interactive board yoonji got him for their anniversary.
this year was the second one, only the second, but both of them can easily say that it’s one of their favorite days of the year.
it wasn’t their dating anniversary, that one was on november 6, when jeongguk, with a pink blush high on his chubby cheeks, had asked his favorite noona if she wanted to be his girlfriend.
they love and cherish that day too, of course, but the 28th of may just has a special place in their hearts.
on the 28th of may it was the first time yoonji was allowed to take care of koo, starting a journey that’d allow her to become his mama, a day she could never, ever forget.
when jeongguk had just started experimenting with age regression, it had been a bit hard to find things that suited his headspace the way he wanted them to.
most of the things portrayed on agere blogs or socmed accounts were overly colorful items. onesie pajamas, playmats, colorful crayons, online games, and tv shows, most things in different shades of pastel colors, things that yes, were nice, but never managed to catch his attention quite right.
it took some trial and error for them to find things that little koo actually enjoys because he’s very particular with the noise, the colors, and the texture of basically everything he owns, but with enough patience and care, they manage.
he likes everything to be soft, they discover. his blankets, his plushies, his socks, the big hoodies he likes to wear, everything. he doesn’t like toys that make noises, because most of the time those are too loud and sudden, and more often than not, end up spooking him.
he likes soft colors that don’t look too vibrant, which is why he enjoys wooden toys and cream clothes, even if he sometimes gets messy while eating and they have to wash them with a specially strong detergent in order to get all the stains.
the new board she gave him is made out of wood, with nice brown and beige drawings all over the different buttons, pockets, drawers, and more, and if yoonji puts treats inside of it every once in a while for koo to find, well, can you really blame her?
when the clock hits 7 they start getting ready for their trick-or-treat excursion.
kookoo goes first, of course. yoonji gets him in his fuzzy comfy cute bunny onesie–the kind that doesn’t have feet, because he gets sweaty otherwise and that’s icky–, puts on his floppy gray ears, and then with an eyeliner, she carefully draws a couple of whiskers on his cheeks, paired with some coloring the tip of his nose, and finishing with a soft kiss that makes her lips get stained with black, but it makes koo giggle, so it’s all good.
when he’s ready yoonji sends him on his merry way to the living room so he can keep playing while she gets ready herself. the costume they choose is silly and cheap, it makes her look a bit ridiculous but that’s kind of the point, koo thinks she looks cute anyway, and that’s what matters to her.
koo, on the other hand, stumbles clumsily to the living room and plops down on the floor to keep playing with his toys. he has both bunbun and gigi, his new best friends, with him, because they're the best and if he's going out of course they're coming with him!
going out, he thinks. he and mama are going out, going out to do trick or trick and get candy! they're gonna knock on people's doors, see other kids, other people dressed up, he's gonna get some yummy lollipops and those chewy candies that leave his tongue all blue, and maybe even chocolate! chocolate would be yummy, he can share it with mama and they can eat together until their tummies hurt from too much sweetness.
it's gonna be so cool, everyone's gonna see how cool he looks and how nice his mama is and how he's so lucky cause he has the best caregiver in the whole world. everyone's gonna see!
everyone's gonna see.
other kids, other adults, the neighbors, the guy who works at the convini in the next block.
everyone's gonna see.
suddenly, the idea of going out doesn't sound that good anymore. suddenly, the candy is not enough of an excuse to expose himself, he doesn't know why, he doesn't understand where this fear is coming from because he's a very good boy! he's nice and mama always says he's polite, and well behaved and he looks cute! no scary monster, he's a pretty bunny but why is his heart beating so fast then? why does he feel like crying? why does he want to get away from the door /fast/?
the feelings are too big, the don’t belong to him, he’s small, too small to comprehend them, too small to properly understand why going out is such a terrifying idea, why it could be dangerous, why some part of him refuses to.
he’s too little to be feeling like this. scarily so.
when yoonji gets out of the room, all dressed up with a big big hat and everything, she doesn't see koo sitting with his toys.
"bunny?" she calls, looking around for him, half expecting him to jump from behind the couch to try and scare her.
koo doesn't call back, though. instead, the only noise that alerts her where her baby might be is a ruffle, and there, behind the curtain, a lump and a pair of socked feet.
"koo?" she calls again, walking in his direction, pulling the curtain aside to uncover the little boy hiding behind it.
she's still kind of expecting him to jump up to surprise her, but what she sees instead is her sweet angel curled up on himself, covering his face with his hands, hiding.
by the shake of his shoulders alone she knows he's crying. "oh, koo," yoonji sighs, wrapping her arms around his body, bringing him close. jeongguk returns the hug instantly, pulling his hands away from his face and clinging to her neck, hiding on her instead of behind the curtain.
it's heartbreaking, it truly is, but the fact that koo's still seeking out for her, that he's not pushing her away still brings yoonji some slight relief.
"mah-ma," koo cries out. yoonji can't see him, but she knows there are tears spilling down the apple of his chubby cheeks. "mama, mama, mama, mama," he keeps chanting between wet sobs.
"it's okay, baby, mama's here, you can cry, mama's here bun, it's gonna be all fine, mama's gonna fix it, you can cry," she mumbles, trying to soothe him, to reassure him somehow that he's okay, that he's not alone and that she's not upset at him for crying.
"mah-mah," he stutters when his crying has died down a little, and all that’s left are just dry hiccups.
yoonji gently pries him away from her, holding his face with both hands. the makeup that was once drawing whiskers on his cheeks is all smudged now, and his pouty lips still quiver around the words. "no out, mama," he begs, new tears forming in his eyes. "no out, sworry, no out, no out," he repeats, holding yoonji's wrists with his hands, not to pull her away, but to keep her close, almost as if he thought yoonji would leave him.
no out, he says.
"oh, baby love," yoonji coos, her own eyes feeling a bit wet just because of how much it hurts to see jeongguk cry. "we don't have to go out, it's okay if you don't want to! we can stay here aaaaall day long and cuddle in bed and eat sweets here. mama has lots of candy for you, we don't have to go anywhere, we can stay," she assures him.
"stay?" koo sniffles.
"yes, koo, we stay. do you want to stay here?"
koo nods furiously. "stay," he confirms, "sworry. got- got pwretty but no out."
yoonji lets out a sigh. her chest feels tight tight tight, she doesn't know what to do with all the love she feels for this boy.
"no sorry," she tells him, leaning her forehead against his. "no sorry, we can be pretty inside, just us, is that good? just koo and mama."
"koo n mama," he nods, sniffling softly. "n bunbun n gigi."
"and bunbun and gigi, of course," yoonji smiles.
they stay like that for a bit more, squatting on the floor, hidden behind the curtain, until the last lone tears spill from koo's eyes and he's able to breathe normally again without stuttering.
"no cry," he tells her, and it's adorable how determined he looks. "kiss."
some things are fixed just by some reassurance and a little kiss.
"actually, kookoo, i might have just the right thing for us to do tonight."
—
"ttok-ttok!"
yoonji opens the door to their bedroom, a bowl of candy in hand, letting out an over-exaggerated gasp. "oh goodness! is it halloween already?" she says, as if she's not in a costume herself.
koo giggles at her surprise, holding bunbun in front of his face, with one of the short little arms raised as if the plushie was the one knocking at the door. on the floor in front of him, strategically positioned is his candy bucket, in the shape of an unusually nice pumpkin.
"tik or tik!" koo babbles, making an extremely high-pitched voice for his doll.
yoonji's about to melt into a puddle on the floor right at this moment.
"but of course! what are you dressed up as, mister bunny?"
"wolf!" koo replies, making a loud howl.
the caregiver jumps, seemingly scared. "such a scary wolf, here, here you have candy," she says, taking a generous handful from her bowl and putting it in koo's basket.
" 'kay, thanks you, bye!" koo says, taking the basket and quickly turning around.
yoonji follows her part, because believe it or not she's a very good actress, and closes the door again, waiting for koo to come back with another one of his stuffies.
"ttok-ttok!" koo yells, not daring to actually knock on the door, but giggling madly at their play pretend.
"hello there!" yoonji says when she opens the door. this time she's faced with gigi, in kookoo's hands, and she has one of yoonji's black handkerchiefs tied around her neck. "what do we have here today?"
"vampire! uhhh," he laughs, in a voice yoonji thinks is supposed to be her own.
not a very flattering tone, if she's being completely honest, but well, if you can't fight against them, join them.
"such a good costume! the best-dressed vampire i've seen today! here’s your candy!" she says, placing another handful in koo's now emptied basket.
"thank bye-" koo starts saying, about to close the door himself to move on to the next plushie, before he stops dead in his tracks and looks at yoonji with a pout. "mama, koo f'got tik or tik," he whines, frustrated at his own forgetfulness.
"you don't have to say it every time," yoonji smiles, fixing his bunny ears that at this point are falling from his head. "sometimes people give candy just because your costume is so cool! you can say trick or treat with the next stuffie, okay?"
"uhm!" the baby nods, decided. "please, thank you, bye!" he yells, before running to the living room to get his next toy.
just like that, every single one of koo's plushies comes to yoonji's door for some candy. kumamon is dressed as a flower, ellie the elephant is dressed up as a princess, hello kitty is dressed as kuromi, and kuromi as hello kitty, they came together, because they are best friends which means they always have to be together.
nini bear came dressed up as a grandma, for some reason, kiki bear came as a kitten, and mimi bear came as an idol, again, for some reason unknown to yoonji.
nearing the end she has to very carefully ration the candy she has so all of the dolls can get some. turns out she's been spoiling koo with gifts way more often than she thought.
yoonji makes a mental list of who's left, and by the time all the toys have had their time, it's koo alone who knocks at her door, holding the overly full basket in his hands, smiling widely, his front teeth making him look like a real bunny.
"there it is, my favorite little bunny in the whole world!" she greets him, opening her arms for a hug.
koo has none of that, though. "tik or tret, mama!" he says instead, holding out the basket in her direction.
"ah, you only came for my candy, i see," she fake-sulks, getting the last of the chocolates and lollipops and placing them on koo's basket as she's done at least fifteen times already.
koo seems to notice that, the fact that her bowl is now empty, and judging by the look on his face, he's not at all happy with that.
"mama no candy?" he asks, tilting his head to the side like a curious puppy.
maybe next year she can convince him to dress up as a puppy instead of a bunny.
"it's okay, sweetheart, the candy was for you," she says, not wanting him to worry that little head of his.
jeongguk makes a little humming sound like he's thinking very hard about how to proceed with the situation. when he seems to have found the answer he jumps excitedly in his place. "no cry, mama! we share, koo share wit mama!" he says, showing her the heavy pumpkin overfilled with the most sugary substances known to man.
yoonji doesn't even like candy, for god's sake.
"oh baby, you are so kind," she says instead, bringing a hand to her chest, infinitely grateful. "what did i do to deserve such a kind baby? mama would love to share with you, such a sweet little thing."
koo squirms and giggles at the praise. "koo good?" he asks, his eyes shining with absolute admiration, with so much tender love.
yoonji can't resist the urge to jump over him and shower his face with a million little kisses. "the best, best boy ever, mama's so proud of you, koo baby, you did so well, my little angel, so pretty, so small."
she's looking up at him, tilting her head back to squish his cheeks and look into his eyes, jeongguk's at least double her size, so much wider and bigger than her, but who cares if he looks like a big scary boy? he's always going to be her smallest bunny, the one she wants to squeeze tightly into her arms and bite softly because she doesn't know what to do with so much cuteness aggression, with so much stupidly deep love.
“love mama," koo manages to say, in the middle of getting attacked with kisses and cuddles.
"love koo."
—
jeongguk's admittedly a bit embarrassed when he realizes how the weekend's events ended going down.
it surely wasn't on the plan to stay at home, to have a little breakdown before even stepping a foot outside, but he can't deny that he's somewhat glad it didn't happen in public, that they were able—read, yoonji was able– to perfectly manage the situation.
"thank you," he says the next day, when they're still cozy and warm in bed, too lazy from all the snacking the night before and too tired from all the laughing.
"what for?" yoonji asks, voice groggy with sleep.
her hair is a mess, it's everywhere, all over her face, all over her pillow, but jeongguk's careful not to accidentally pull at any of it.
"for yesterday," he says, cheeks dusted pink with embarrassment. "thanks for always taking care of me."
yoonji makes a frustrated noise, the one she does when you compliment her and she doesn't know how to reply, and with a rather admirable strength, manages to roll them over so that jeongguk's on his back and she's sitting on top of him.
"we agreed on not saying thank you for these types of things," she says, pointing at him accusatorily.
"what can i say, i'm a very polite boyfriend," jeongguk defends, shrugging.
yoonji rolls her eyes, "stop, you know what you are doing," she says, playfully shoving his shoulder. "you don't say thank you for getting the bare minimum, you don't say thank you for people taking care of you and you don't say thank you for people loving you," she enumerates.
"aish, what am i allowed to say then?" jeongguk grumbles, crossing his arms.
"say you love me," yoonji says, simply. "that's always nice to hear."
jeongguk inhales sharply, silence fills the room. "oh. my. god." he says, like he's in pain as if the words physically pained him.
in a second, yoonji's back on the bed, getting dragged down by jeongguk's strong arms, her face pushed right against his chest where he hugs her so tight it's almost suffocating.
not a bad way to go.
"you are such a softie," jeongguk cries out, "i love you, you sap, of course i do."
yoonji would say it back if only she could speak, but she's too busy getting aggressively cuddled right now, and there's no way she's voluntarily pulling away.
not like jeongguk doesn't know it, anyway.