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There’s a She Wolf in Your Closet

Summary:

Hunter has always felt… different. Like the body he had wasn’t made with him in mind. He could never pinpoint the reason, nor how to fix it, so he just pushed those thoughts aside and focused on his duty to his Emperor.

When he found out he was a Grimwalker, he thought, ‘That’s it. That’s what’s wrong with me’.

Then he discovered human music like Shakira, and he found there was more to it than that.
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Or: Transfem Hunter, let’s gooooooo!

Notes:

Knew the moment I heard She Wolf by Shakira that I would be writing this fic. Hope you enjoy this disaster of a witch like I do.
Warning: He/Him pronouns for Hunter until he officially transitions in the fic and picks out a name, much may be a bit. An identify isn't made in a day, after all.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: This Song Hits Way Too Hard

Chapter Text

 

 

It seems Luz had decided that it was her sole mission (besides finding a way back to the Demon Realm) to introduce the group of witches to all things human. So far, this has involved different types of foods and drinks presented at the dining table, strange cartoons and shows on the flat crystal ball-like device, and dusty board games from the closet.

 

It’s all been quaint, Hunter can admit that much, but he’s been more focused on survival than anything. Not that the others aren’t worried, he can see how they work tirelessly on ways make a portal, how they often discuss new methods and resources to apply, but they also avoid the topic whenever they don’t actively work on a solution. He can understand the avoidance, knowing what overworking and overthinking on something so much bigger than you can do.

 

So, he lets them enjoy as much as they can, taking the brunt of the other responsibilities for himself so maybe they’ll all come out of this okay. When they share meals, Hunter refrains from more then he truly needs. When they go to sleep, he stays up late, checking locks and making the usual rounds. When they indulge in games and hobbies and other forms of entertainment, he keeps to himself, supportive at the outskirts but never indulging himself.

 

It’s something he’s honed since he was half his current size, spending years as a soldier, and a good one at that.

 

Such a good scout you make. And a better Golden Guard.

 

But it couldn’t last, not with the others attention on him. It was Luz who noticed his differing behavior first, which seemed only logical, he muses, since she was the privy to more of his business than the others, and had shown the most interest in getting him involved in things. Willow followed suit, as Gus and surprisingly Amity all tried to get him into all sorts of things they too were discovering here. Even Vee, after they had settled in the others presence enough and he had assured her he was no threat. Camila was naturally loving to an intense degree, and was equally involved in everyone’s business, so it didn’t really mean much when she turned her attention to him too.

 

They had decided that he needed to get into all sorts of hobbies which, really, he had plenty already. He had sewing, patrols and Flapjack. That was all he needed to keep his attention aside from the portal, but no! He had to get into all these other things.

 

One of said things, at least for today, was music. He knew music, would even whistle a few tunes he’s heard when on duty (only when he was sure he was alone) and when a band would be playing on the numerous events he was made to attend as on-duty guard for. But the music they insisted he listen to were… different. Yeah, different, that was a descriptive word.

 

For the most part, everyone has found they had their own preferred ‘taste in genre’ (how you can taste music, Hunter wouldn’t know) and have shared said genres with him.

 

Gus has formed an interest in anything techno, alternative, electric and whatever ‘disco’ is, interested in the way the music made him feel all ‘buzzed with energy’ as he’s described. Hunter sees the appeal, but it just makes him more jittery. Not a bad jittery, but he’s already jittery as a default state, so he just says it’s nice and they move on.

 

Willow claims she really ‘vibes’ (another human word, he’s sure) with indie-folk and indie-rock. The themes are especially up her alley, she explains, saying the nature and magic and mystery of it all is pleasing. Luz makes some comment on Willow having ‘cottage core vibes’ and when Hunter asks what a cottages insides have to do with Willow, she just laughs and calls him an old fart, both words he does actually know is thoroughly offended by. He lets her know as much by pelting a nearby pillow at her, and they have to be stopped before another pillow fight breaks out.

 

Vee pipes up at some point that she’s found most music enjoyable and can’t really settle on one, but when Hunter claims the same no one takes him at his word and keep overbearing him with their music samples. Vee would later admit she found a certain attachment to a lot of musicals and their songs, but assumed that didn’t count as a genre. Hunter says he doesn’t understand any of this stuff either way, but says he’d like to hear what she would want him to listen too. It’s a nice moment, when she smiles and says they can watch some together. It’s nice.  

 

Luz and Amity share the same interests in pop, rock, and whatever stuff is in anime which is apparently different but wasn’t explained well to him when asked. Amity has shown a particular interest in punk rock, saying it reminds her of the stuff her older siblings would play. Luz has also shared some songs in Latin pop, which no one understands but Hunter has so far found the whole ‘pop genre’ appealing, the beats ‘popping’ as the name implies but not so overwhelming and nonsensical that he can’t follow in some way. As it turns out, it’s considered one the more popular genres of music, so there’s plenty to listen too. Hunter isn’t sure whether to be excited or dreadful of the information.

 

He's laying on the floor with Luz beside him, mirroring his zoned-out expression as they just listening to the seemingly endless mix-bag playlist of songs. Hunter is vaguely aware of the words and sounds and beat, but so far it’s all just washed over him, mostly honed onto Luz’s voice whenever she decides to talk or just her breathing.

 

Then, a different beat picks up. Another pop song, he can tell, but it hits a little different. When the singer, a human woman he assumes, starts singing, he finds himself tuned in to that instead of whatever Luz is saying to or at him. Some of the speech is a bit fast and modified he can’t hear it clearly, but some parts repeat clearly enough he can understand.

 

He barely notices his hand patting just under chest in sync to the beat, the way his breath catches just barely as he focuses on the words enough to not breath a steady rhythm. He’s murmuring the repeated lyrics before he knows it, low and jumbled.

 

“There’s a she-wolf in your closet. Let it out so it can breathe,” he says softly, humming to the new lyrics after. He ends up cutting himself off when he sees Luz rolled onto her stomach and almost hovering over him, looking at him pointedly. “What?” he asks, more defense than he meant, meeting her eyes.

 

“You were singing along,” Luz points, like it wasn’t completely obvious.

 

“Yeah, that’s a thing people do. Titan knows you won’t shut up in the shower like the whole house doesn’t hear- oof!” He’s cut off when Luz silently takes a pillow and smacks his face, leaving it to lay there. Hunter doesn’t move, just laying back. It’s then he realizes the song that he was singing to has passed, some other song now playing, and he shoves down the disappointment at that.

 

He only removes the pillow when, instead of hitting him with anymore pillows, the music is stopped and a few audible clicks from Luz’s phone screen are heard, and the song from before is played again, the volume a little louder than before. Luz lays back beside him, singing along more confidently to the lyrics while not overpowering the actual singer. After a few seconds, Hunter sings along too, even howling to the right parts, feeling silly. His voice feels wrong compared to both the singers and Luz’s more feminine tones. Still, he sings along, and finds after a while that the song seems to be repeating itself on loop.

 

At some point Hunter stops, resting his voice, especially since he’s not used to even talking so much, nonetheless singing like this. Luz stops too, getting up to lower the volume before setting it back down. She crawls back over to him, expression curious in a way that reminds him of the first time they had met face-to-face, not face-to-helmet. When she had looked at him in a whole new light, a determined glint like she was sure she could peel back all that armor to reveal a dumb kid just like her. That look should of made him more nervous, but he’s since learned that she can let others privacy with the right reasoning and trust given.

 

“You like it?” Luz asks, head tilted with a knowing smile.

 

“Yeah, it’s… nice. Really nice. I like the- beats, real popping and stuff.” Luz laughs at this, and he’s sure he used a word wrong or something, but she speaks over his unsure thoughts.

 

“The song is She-Wolf by Shakira, just so you know. It’s one of those pop songs you like, so I’m not surprised you like it.”

 

“’Shakira’? Is this one of those one-name singers you’ve mentioned? Like Beyoncé?”

 

“Yep,” Luz confirms, popping the ‘p’. “She has a lot of popular songs and stuff, both in English and Spanish. She’s even called the ‘Queen of Latin Music’.” Luz folds both hands under chin, making some dumb, awed expression while Hunter silently judges her. “Had a phase for a hot month or two where I binged all her stuff, so I get the appeal. Here,” Luz scramble up to get her phone, turning off the song loop and swiping and clicking furiously, before crying out “Aha!” and shoving the phone at Hunter. “This is her.”

 

Hunter steadies the phone in his hands and get a closer look on this ‘Shakira’ person. It appears to her the cover picture for the mentioned song, the title in bold font underneath. The person herself is in a dominating stance, looking at the camera with hooded, dark shadowed eyes, dirty blonde hair ruffled and wild but still appealing. Her outfit is cut off at the waist, a black, sleeveless top with a half circle chunk cut at the chest.

 

Something about it makes Hunters insides squirm and twist, getting all messy while his brain gets stuck on the image, not able to put the right worlds to what he’s feeling. But it’s something, a lot of something.

 

He must look like an idiot, because Luz giggles at him, leaning forward to see the image. Her looks between her own phone and Hunters face, expression smug. “She’s really pretty, huh?”

 

“I wish I looked like that.”

 

Luz blinks, caught off guard by the comment, and so is Hunter. He snaps out of his funk and gives Luz the phone back, almost hitting her back with the sudden force. He feels his face heat up with shame that he can’t identify, just that he feels weird about what he said. But… it’s true, in a way. He can’t say he wants to actually be this person, or what about her he wants to be like, he just knows he wants.

 

“It’s getting close to dinner, right?” Hunter asks, but before Luz can neither confirm nor it, he’s up and hurrying over to the bedroom door, calling out, “I’m gonna help Ms. Noceda with prepping things, okay, bye!” And then he’s gone.

 

He ignores that strange stirring in his gut for the rest of the day, as well as the looks Luz keeps shooting him over the dinner table. It’ll probably pass, he’s sure of it.