Chapter Text
“Bottom line is, it’s a shitty dumb game and I don’t want to play anymore.” He eyed the few other passengers, conscious of swearing in front of grown ups. The bus was mostly empty, unsurprising as the destination was nearly two hours outside of any major city. In fact, he couldn’t even name a major city in the whole state. Oregon was like Saskatchewan in Canada or Pluto. Nothing but desolate wasteland as far as anyone could see.
“Aw, come on Dip. That was one round! Just ‘cause you didn’t win the first time doesn’t mean you have to give up.” His sister was fidgeting with the purple orb.
“It has nothing to do with winning or anything.” He said, getting further agitated, “It’s stupid.”
“Connect-Four wasn’t stupid until you lost. Once.” She said, “All of a sudden, it was beneath you. I think I’m recognizing a pattern.”
Dipper ran his hands through his ponytail and adjusted the worn-out tie again. Mabel looked up from the game and grinned, she had him there.
“I thought since this had a higher number in the title, it would be more stimulating to the great Dipper Pines.” Dipper laughed and rubbed his eyes again, still catching flakey bits of mascara coming off in his palms. Their mom had insisted he wear some eye-makeup today to cover up the dark circles and once she started, she got sort of carried away. Mabel had done nothing but look sick in the corner as more and more sparkles were brushed onto his eyelids.
“It looks fine.”
“It’s still coming off though.”
“Yeah, but you can’t notice it. I mean, unless someone pointed it out.”
“Shh!” Dipper whispered, he didn’t want to draw attention to himself or the makeup. The other passengers were undisturbed. “Sorry.”
“We’ll get it all off at the stop.”
She had placed extra emphasis on ‘The Stop’. Dipper nodded and held a small smile on his face thinking of what was coming. Mabel finally got the game working again.
“Okay, do you want to try again? Third time’s a charm.”
“It’s okay. You do it.” Mabel crossed her eyes to the floor, all her attempts to engage her brother so far had failed. And she was sure that after this morning’s episode, he was still feeling like… well, bad. He redid his pony tail for the fifth time and Mabel’s hands couldn’t help but run through her short hair. She had managed to convince her parents not to shave her head for soccer season but what she got wasn’t too far off. The longest strand couldn’t have come more than an inch off of her head. Dipper was lucky in that way, she supposed. At least once it was off, it was off. Mabel would have to wait another six months before she came anywhere near her former length. And even then, it didn’t look very girlish. She bit her lip and pressed the start button on the 20 Questions Sphere. She didn’t have any specific celebrity or character in mind but she started playing anyway. The game quickly got confused, with the artificial intelligence being unable to win, as there was no actual person inside Mabel’s head. It took its sweet time, all 20 questions were up before it finally started guessing. Somehow, George Washington came up first with a small banner in black and white reading: “Was I Right?”. Mabel stopped, well technically, I guess it wasn’t right. Mabel wasn’t thinking of George Washington even though she wasn’t thinking of anyone. She hit ‘No’, and kept playing. ‘Was I Right’ flashed across the screen for the third time before Mabel clicked the yes button, she had started to pity the tiny robot and it wouldn’t really be fair to claim any kind of victory. She was just cheating. It started to make the little beeping sounds in a tiny celebration and Dipper let out a breath: happy, it sounded like, to hear that the twins were even.
“There, see? I’m dumb now too.” Mabel stuffed the toy back in her backpack, fingers brushing up against the cool blade of the scissors she’d packed. It was last minute in action though the two had been planning to bring them since the trip started. It would probably be a couple days before their mom realized the scissors had been misplaced and weeks before she would suspect the twins had snuck them off to Oregon. What could they need them for?
Dipper, tugging on the ponytail yet again, was getting desperate. They had promised each other to wait at least two hours before stopping and changing. But Dipper could feel the weight of his hair on his head and the clothes in the bag underneath him were like a hot pit in his stomach. They had never done anything like this before. They’d never even dressed in public.
“Maybe this isn’t a good idea.” Mabel stated, she could feel his nerves building from across the seat.
“What?’
“You know, maybe everyone will just… be able to tell right away.” Dipper had wide eyes now, he hadn’t anticipated this. They had been laboring over every detail of the plan for weeks, cultivating every angle, ruling out all possible errors and now, his partner in crime was pulling out at the last second.
“They won’t, what makes you say that? Of course, they won’t. With my hair and some makeup-.”
“Exactly, Dipper!” She was keeping her voice down but it was clear if she could, these words would be louder. “Your hair. You’re gonna look great, but no one’s gonna believe for a second that I’m a girl with… this.” She ran her fingers through the short tufts. Dipper reached for her knee which she drew closer into her chest, pulling the stained t-shirt over her legs.
“Mabel-”
“I’ll be humiliated.”
“Mabel, I promise if we just-”
“And what if we go swimming, Dipper!”
“We’ve thought about it. I’ve thought about it and we have a plan.” Mabel’s breathing was shallow now, rapid intakes. “Where’s the sister who doesn’t give a shit what other people think?” He asked, forcing a smile, and trying to attract Mabel’s gaze.
Mabel raised her eyes, blurry and flooding and spit out,
“We both know what happened to him.” Dipper cringed upon hearing the false pronouns. Mabel very rarely misgendered herself in private, even to prove a point. “He grew up a bit.”
The year had been rough.
Mabel was right though, she used to be different when things weren’t quite as complicated: pretty impartial to what others thought of her but as puberty dawned, they both started to face some uncomfortable realities. Some that were already doing damage and some that were still waiting to hit. In early march, Dipper had gotten his period. That took several months of counseling and talking down to keep him from hurting himself.
Mabel, maturing fast for someone her age, had already found a few too many dark hairs on her legs and arms, stole her mother’s gillette Venus and gave herself enough razor burn to be faintly red for a week. Her parents weren’t pleased and had launched into the afterschool special discussion of “natural changes” and “new feelings” that they might experience. They had managed to sit through that without exploding, gripping hotly onto each other’s hands, but then there was the one-on-one discussion with each parent. Dipper had received a training bra and a “feminine” razor while Mabel was left with a stick of old spice and an advice pamphlet on dealing with ‘Sexual Fantasies’.
The two snuck out later that night and burned the items in a small pot on the roof of the town house, playing tracks from Spring Awakening on Mabel’s tiny iPod Nano.
That was March and things had only got worse as the summer neared. Pool parties, tight clothing and dresses were all becoming quite real again and it was too hot for either twin to wear sweaters anymore. School became more and more miserable and they only found comfort in coming home and locking themselves in each other’s rooms, picking out small things to try on that wouldn’t raise suspicion.
“Isn’t that Hana’s headband?” Their father asked Mabel one night as the two watched something mindless in the living room. Mabel froze, eyeing Dipper for some kind of assistance. He looked just as panicked.
“I let him wear it, Dad.” Dipper finally said after a minute of silence. “He- uh- needed to keep the hair out of his eyes.”
“You could use a haircut, bud.” Their father nodded, “Might be smart to get one before June. You’ll overheat.”
“I’m sure he’s fine.” Dipper jumped in, wishing he’d come up with a better excuse. “He can just use my bandanas and stuff!” But the damage was done, and Mabel was at the barber the next day.
What was originally intended to be a slight trim, according to Mabel, had ended up in a near buzz, shaving down the sides and losing a lot of the volume on top. She looked more masculine than ever and even on the eighty-five degree day, wore a beanie home. She ran upstairs, clutching the hat down on her head. Both Dipper and his mom gave their father a funny look as he came up after her. He simply shrugged his shoulders and Dipper followed her to their rooms.
Mabel cried a lot that night, and yelled a lot, mostly at Dipper and their parents. But by midnight, she’d worn herself out and was not curled at the headboard of Dipper’s bed, half asleep.
“This summer’s gonna suck.” The comment came out like a snore, Dipper nodded. He rubbed her shoulder and then stood up, assuming that he’d lost his bed tonight. He rolled out a yoga mat from under the bed, this happened with some frequency, and pulled a secondary cover off of Mabel. She wouldn’t miss it.
Before he could settle in, someone knocked at the door.
“Yeah?” Dipper’s mom peaked her head out from behind the frame.
“Hey.” She whispered, seeing Mabel asleep. “He staying in with you tonight?”
“Yeah.”
“How is he?” She asked,
“Seen better days, I guess.” His mom smiled sadly.
“Guys are so particular about their hair, huh? It’s a good thing the stuff grows back.” Dipper didn’t return any kind of smile. His mother didn’t waiver.
“He really doesn’t want to play soccer this summer does he?”
“No.”
“Hm.” She rubbed her eyes under her glasses and pressed her nails against the wooden frame of the bed. “I have an idea that your father might like even better.”
“What?”
“Do you remember your Great Uncle Stanford?” Dipper raised his eyebrows. “Come on, Hana, do you?”
“The crazy old guy who lives in the middle of the woods? Does he even remember us? Does he remember anything?” The words slipped out and Dipper stopped, realizing something.
No, he probably doesn’t.
“I know, he’s old and it’s an isolated town. But it could be fun for you two, at least for the first few weeks of summer-”
“We’ll do it, Mom.”
“Huh?”
“We’ll live with… great… uncle whatever. Dan will like it. I promise.” His mom looked at the sleeping girl, skeptically.
“And I’m assuming you just had a telepathic twin moment to know he’s okay with it?”
“I just know Mom, get the tickets. Call him, whatever. Just- we’ve gotta do this.” Her eyes were wide now, it certainly wasn’t the reaction she was expecting.
“Well, okay. I’ll call him tonight.” She stood up and looked back at his sister one last time, “It’ll be good for him, to have some time in the woods. Might buff him up a little.” She finished as she stepped down the stairs.
Dipper nodded, hiding the internal discomfort, he knew it wouldn’t matter soon. He had a plan.
Things had come together rapidly as the school year ended. Mabel agreed to everything, letting Dipper handle the details and focusing on the big picture herself. She was gonna get to live as Mabel for a whole summer. A whole three months of hearing her real name on everyone’s lips. The prospect was terrifying and exhilarating. While Dipper was agonizing over everything that could go wrong, Mabel was daydreaming about all the potential the situation had. Certainly no one would recognize them and as long as they played their cards right regarding any conversation between Stanford and their parents, it could work out.
Potentially.
On the morning of, Mabel grabbed the scissors from the kitchen counter and skipped off, claiming she needed to cut some select choices of construction paper for any possible art projects she’d embark on. Their parents didn’t think twice about it.
She slipped it into her backpack and the twins looked at the suitcases, stupid grins on their faces. As soon as they got on the bus, they could swap and pick out the clothes they really wanted for their first day in Gravity Falls, Oregon.
“We could say you had Leukemia.” Dipper suggested without thinking, Mabel gave him a horrified look.
“We are not saying I had Leukemia, Dipper!” She slapped his arm.
“It was just an idea!”
“A terrible one, bro-bro.” She muttered, but Dipper had a smile on his face now. Ever since he’d come out, she’d taken it on herself to come up with as many Dipper and brother related nicknames as she could. They were innumerable now, but they still made Dipper smile whenever he heard them.
“We’ll figure it out. No one’s first question is gonna be, ‘What’s up with her short hair?’, unless they’re a total jerk.” Mabel nodded and looked out the window, Dipper tapped her shoulder.
“It’s gonna work, you know?” He said quietly, “We’ve planned for everything. It’s gonna work.”
Mabel smiled and nodded. She punched her twin in the arm and got one back.
The bus was slowing down now and pulling into the tiny 7/11 style convenience store. Mabel looked at Dipper and nodded, both their stomachs were turning. This was it.
The driver put it in park and stood up slowly. He looked ancient, way too old to be operating anything this big.
“Alright folks, fifteen minutes and we’ll start up again.” He said, without emotion.
Even though they were seated the furthest back, the kids snuck through the line with their stuff and got off first. Mabel grabbed Dipper’s hand and scanned the area. Dipper’s eye caught a small space behind an icebox that could work, he gave a small gesture and Mabel nodded. They went, crouched beneath a window, obscured by brick.
Mabel reached in her bag and pulled out the scissors, she was more nervous than Dipper. After all, she could mess everything up pretty easily. She grabbed Dipper’s ponytail first, grounding her hands in the greasy tangle and looked at him for approval. Dipper, whose eyes gave away his nerves, shut them and nodded. Within a few snips, the hair was on the ground and Dipper was left with a messy bob. Then, Mabel truly went to work, cleaning the edges and bringing everything close enough to a shave that it didn’t resemble anything one would call “girl hair”.
“Okay, I think it’s good.” She said, clipping the last few long strands off his right ear and setting the scissors down.
“Good?” Dipper asked anxiously.
“Enough.” Mabel replied, grinning nervously, “You look… handsome.” Dipper beamed and opened his hand for the mirror. She pulled it out of the bag as well before noticing a thin red line on the top of her brother’s earlobe.
“Oh shoot, I totally clipped your ear.”
“What?”
“I made you bleed and stuff.” Dipper’s eyes widened for a moment.
“I didn’t feel anything.” Mabel nodded.
“I guess that means you’re okay.” She looked at the scissors again, contemplative. The cut didn’t look bad, but it would at least need a band-aid. Good thing they brought first aid just in case. Dipper always thought of everything.
“Could I…” Dipper said, impatient, “Could I see the mirror?”
“Oh! Yeah, sorry.” She handed it over and grabbed. “I have to go change, I’ll meet you on the bus in ten.” Her words fell on deaf ears, Dipper was looking at his reflection in the tiny powder mirror, covered in dust, and liking what he saw for the first time.
“I…” He started and then noticed that Mabel was gone. “Thanks Mabel.”
In the single bathroom (thank God), Mabel went through what she had practiced a million times in their room back in California. She slipped out of the shirt and pulled on the tank top and sweater she’s brought. Better to look lumpy than show off the flattest chest any girl her age was likely to have. She checked her phone. She was almost out of time. Rushing through the application of eyeshadow and blush, she took some time to cover up the choice red marks appearing on her forehead. Pulling on the skirt and socks, she emerged from the stall, shoes in hand. She didn’t even get time to look in the mirror before racing back to the door of the bus. Walking up the steps, she felt her stomach turn over what the other passenger’s might say when she reached the top. But on taking the final step, none of them were even looking at her. In fact, the only eyes that matched her gaze as she walked down the aisle were Dipper’s, awestruck by what he was seeing.
She was pretty. Mabel was pretty.
Dipper couldn’t hide his grins for long and his contagion got Mabel smiling too. By the time she reached the back of the bus, they had exploded into giggles and tears, clutching onto each other for pure joy. After calming down, Mabel whispered to her brother, “You know, we look pretty good.” which got them started all over again.
They had completely phase one, now all that was left was convincing Gravity Falls.
When they reached their stop, the initial giddiness had worn off and the twins felt nervous all over again. There remained that very realistic possibility that their Great Uncle would see through everything instantly and call their parents, bringing what could be an incredible summer to an unwanted halt. The bus slowed for the third time and Dipper and Mabel were the only two left on the bus. They took their time lagging to the front, Mabel feeling the skirt swish around her and Dipper getting used to the lack of mass on the back of his head. He felt freed.
Their Great Uncle Stanford was dressed like he was going to a funeral for a very eccentric supervillain, eye patch and all. A ragged red fez was tilting on his forehead and the twins clutched hands, suddenly even more nervous than before. He starred the two down as they descended the stairs of the bus and one thought ran through both Dipper and Mabel’s minds, the jig was up. Frowning, he scrutinized as the bus pulled away, clicking his tongue against his teeth.
“So…” He said, finally after several agonizing moments, “You kids are my grand-niece and nephew, huh?” Mabel’s voice was caught in her throat.
“Uh, yes sir.” Dipper made a conscionable effort to bring his voice down, resulting in a slight waiver. The older man chuckled and grabbed onto his cane, a silly looking thing with a magic eight ball attached as the head.
“Well kiddos, welcome to the Mystery Shack” He flashed a grin, “And hey! Welcome to Gravity Falls.”