Work Text:
Dirk is holding onto John's shirt like it's his last life line. His head on his chest, his arms around his back feeling his warmth.
Dirk feels worse than beating each other up. He wished he could just punch John in the face for making him feel... like this. But he couldn't let go.
Why are you doing this to me. Why aren't you letting go. Aren't you tired of this? Of me? I ruined everyone's lives. You could just disappear all you want. I don't care.
Dirk is shaking as he felt John hug him slightly closer. He could feel John's steady breathing on his hair. John doesn't say anything.
Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.
It's so easy. It's so fucking easy. Just tell me you fucking hate me-
shut up!!!!!!!!
...
Dirk shuts up.
just shut up...
John pulls Dirk's closer to his chest and softly nuzzles his face in his hair. John rubs his back making him shudder. Dirk scrunch up his face... in disgust? He couldn't tell. He doesn't deserve this. How could a person such as himself, out of all people, be treated with such tenderness like this. How could he deserve him.
John sighs, and places a kiss in Dirk's head. The sudden gesture made Dirk jump slightly. It was like a short circuit, stopping his thoughts on that short moment.
you don't have to over think it. just.. try focusing on some thing else.
And Dirk did. Dirk focuses on John's hands on his back, his breath, the and his heart beat.