Archive of Our Own

04.13.2001

People always said the weird ones stick together. Who knows how they find each other, they just do, and they always get picked on because of it, that’s just the rule. 

Andre Kriegman was one of those weird kids in Iroquois High School, the same school where he got bullied daily, despite quite literally not doing anything to anger anyone. He was an average-looking 16-year-old boy, he had acne on his forehead, and he was lanky looking, but was overall like the rest of the students.

Well, almost.

Every day, Andre would find himself either on the floor, bleeding out from his nose and mouth, or shoved relentlessly by his bullies who tormented him every single day. Some of the teachers noticed this, but rather than actually do something and send these boys and girls into the principal’s office, they just turned a blind eye, pretending they didn’t just witness 3 boys and 2 girls teasing and laughing at Andre.

There were only 2 teachers who seemed to care about him, or at least, cared for their job as teachers, because on one of the days he was being picked on, they marched right over to the bullies and took them to see the principal. Andre remembered their names well; Mr. Donald Whisten and Mr. Goeff Angler, they were his 11th grade English and World History teachers at the time.

To say he was surprised to see that they actually did something to help him was an understatement, he remembered well, he never spoke in their class, never grouped up or participated in any of the activities they initiated. 

If anything, he thought he was invisible to everyone. Nobody seemed to take interest in him, or they purposely ignored him because he was a weird little freak with acne all over his face. It wasn’t as though he liked weird things, in fact, he liked everything most of the kids from his school liked, but they didn’t seem to care for that.

All they cared for was that if you didn’t have any friends, you would be considered the odd one out from that day on.

But even after the teachers stopped the mean kids from picking on him that day, the next day when they were free, they decided to make that another problem in Andre’s life.

“Did you see that? Kriegman got so scared of us he called in his old teachers to save his ass!!!”

“Oh my god, he’s such a fag. I bet when they were alone, he went in and sucked their dicks!!”

“Ew!! He’s such a faggot. I bet he’s getting hard just from us looking at him. Fucking queer.”

Over time, Andre slowly began to just accept the bullying. It wasn’t like he was going to live after this. When he turned 18 years old, that’s when it would all end, everything would soon be over for him.

That is, until he met someone, someone who would soon change every thought Andre had in his mind.

Calvin Gabriel. He moved to the school just a couple of weeks ago. Andre knew this because he met him in his Chemistry class and French class for the past few days. He only got a proper welcome from the French teacher, their science teacher simply told him to sit down on an empty desk and proceeded with the lesson.

“Classe, écoutez attentivement! Pay attention! This is Calvin Gabriel, he just moved here a few weeks ago, so I want everyone to treat him nicely and make him feel comfortable while he’s here! Please, introduce yourself.”

Everyone’s chatter slowly grew silent until all eyes were on this boy. Andre too watched closely. He noticed the blondeness of his hair and how some parts of it were tucked back behind his ears, he noticed how whenever he smiled out of nervousness, the bottom of his teeth would become visible, revealing the bottom sets of braces he had, he never really noticed how blue his eyes were, they were almost like diamonds, absolutely beautiful yet fragile to the touch.

“Uhm…B-Bonjour…uh..my name is Cal…er…Calvin Gabriel. I’m uh, I’m 17, I like…I like the rock band…Pearl Jam…and firearms…I guess…”

Already, Andre heard snickering and giggling from his classmates as Calvin spoke. Honestly, he felt bad. Clearly this boy did not enjoy speaking in front of a large number of people, especially ones that started to laugh the second he opened his mouth. The whispers got so loud, that even Calvin was able to hear them, causing himself to shrink. The more Andre looked, the more he noticed that the boy was ready to cry but held it in so that he wouldn’t get made fun of anymore than he already was.

‘Poor guy…’

“Psst, Andre, look. You’ve got yourself a boyfriend.”

“Ew, gross!! You two fags gonna go makeout in an empty classroom after this?”

“Assez de chuchotements, children. Let us continue with our lesson. Calvin, you may sit wherever you please,” The teacher announced, smiling at the blonde before turning her back to the students.

When Calvin looked in front of them, he watched as most of the students placed their bags up on the empty seats next to them, avoiding all eye contact with him as they did so and continued to whisper to their friends. Andre noticed the frown growing on the boy's face, his hand trembling when he walked towards the tables.

All the tables were ‘occupied’, all except Andre’s. When Calvin looked at him, face not bothering to change, (he probably thought he was going to be like the others), Andre moved all of his belongings away from the spot and moved to the second seat, waiting for the other boy to sit down. He was taken by surprise yet still sat down, looking at him for a second before turning away.

Not a minute goes by before Andre was startled out of his thoughts by someone speaking to him, a shy, hesitant voice was whispering next to him.

“...Are they always like this...?” Calvin mumbled, the grip on his pencil tightening only slightly.

Ah, Andre thought, he’s talking about them.

So, Andre sighed, nodding slowly before speaking. “Yeah..There a bunch of fucking pricks who pick on anyone who isn’t like them.”

“Are you like them?”

Oh, Andre felt like laughing, but at the same time he felt bad when he turned to look at Calvin. His face portrayed that of a little kid, innocent-like and so pure, not knowing absolutely anything about this school and what everyone was like.

“Me? Oh, no. To them, I’m considered the weird one.”

“Really…? But…you don’t look like the weird one..” Calvin looked down, unconsciously biting his lip. Andre felt like the room was getting hotter by the second, suddenly he wanted to claw at his clothes and soothe his skin with something cold.

“Wow, thanks? I think…I don’t know if that’s a compliment or not…”

And then he saw it, something that could have very well changed his whole life in that moment. He thought that the boy was just very quiet and shy, he was always frowning, but now, he did something that Andre never wanted gone.

He smiled. It was a genuine one in fact. It was so sweet and just so nice to look at, Andre never would have thought that he would actually enjoy time with him, especially after only knowing him for a few minutes.

“You’re funny…uhm…”

“Andre, uh…Andre Kriegman.”

“Right, Andre.”

Maybe his plans for ending it all can wait another few months.

It had been a couple of months, maybe 5-6 months in since Calvin came into Andre’s life. And if he was being honest, he never regretted that day since. Hanging out with Calvin was like seeing Santa Claus for the first time as a kid, everything about him just felt so right and being with him felt even better.

Not only would they hang on during school hours, either in an empty classroom or a secret part of the library nobody really knew about except the two, but they would always visit each other’s houses and just hang out, just the two of them. Andre got to meet Calvin’s parents, and Calvin would meet Andre’s parents, even his pet cat, Mel would see him a few times and cuddle with him.

Andre had never felt more happy than he did right then and there. It turned out that they both had a lot of things in common, which only strengthened their friendship bond even more. But yet, even while at school, Andre still kept getting picked on, only this time, the bullies would pick on Calvin as well.

Normally, Andre wouldn’t do anything about the bullying. He figured that if he was going to try and stop them, then he was practically begging for his death. But after witnessing Calvin getting thrown on to the ground, nose bleeding like mad as one of the guys punched him and practically sobbing and begging for them to stop, he had enough.

After they left them alone, Andre grabbed Calvin by the wrist and ran out of the school and into the back where he would find his favorite tree, the one that he had when he had to escape the hell that was that school. After making their way to the tree, Andre sat down on the grass and grabbed his backpack, unzipping the middle part of it to pull out a small medicine box.

“Hold still, alright?” Andre said calmly, trying not to let the anger inside of him come out, especially when Calvin was still silently crying. He opened the medicine box and took out a little bottle of acetone and a small cotton ball, pouring some of the liquid onto it before slowly dabbing it on his friend’s face.

Calvin had gotten quite the beat up. His nose was still bleeding, but now his mouth and the side of his cheek were covered in blood because of it. His lip received quite a terrible scar, but not so terrible that it would leave something major behind, possibly a small faded scar but that was about it.

“Jesus..fuck. I thought they would’ve done more than this, I’m…I’m kinda surprised,” Andre admitted, still trying his best to focus on cleaning up the now dried up blood all over his friend's face.

“Who were they anyway? I don’t think I’ve seen them around…ouch…not so harsh man.”

“Sorry…but, really? You don’t know who they are?”

Calvin shook his head, his blue eyes staring into Andre’s brown ones.

“That was Brad Huff, one of the biggest douchebags at this school, and those other guys? His minions. Honestly, they follow him anywhere, probably never leave him alone, even while taking a piss…” He scoffed, removing his hand away from the other boy’s face to grab a gauze and a bandaid from the medicine box.

“What, do they watch him jack off or something?” Calvin then said, causing a snort to come out of Andre’s mouth. To be fair, he never even considered that, it could have been a possibility. 

As Andre placed the bandage on Calvin’s bruise, he added on to his comment, grinning menacingly.

“Maybe, or or, they help him by jerking him off!!”

This later caused both boys to burst out in laughter, using each other as balance so they wouldn’t fall to the ground. This was the norm to them, one of them would get beaten up, they would head over to their ‘secret’ tree and patch each other up, and laugh at any of the possible things that could happen to the bullies.

Andre felt whole now that he had Calvin as his best friend, like the missing half that he never knew was gone had just patched itself together when the other boy came. No longer did he have to suffer alone, no longer did he have to be by himself in a school where everyone targeted him.

So finding out that Calvin was going to take a leave from school for a couple of weeks due to therapy came as a shock to Andre. He knew that Calvin was just as destroyed and depressed as he was, but apparently it was much more worse than what he was going through. Some days, Calvin never came downstairs to eat with his parents and would stay locked up in his room for so long, his parents even found out that he was physically harming himself when they saw the multiple scars on his arms and legs, some being more recent than others.

Andre tried his best to fend off the bullies, but they always came up, and they always came up tougher than before. Even when he went to the bathroom, he always came back to the sight of his best friend sobbing on the floor, blood gushing out from practically everywhere.

Calvin was a year younger than Andre, making him more vulnerable and sensitive, so Andre promised him that he would always be there to protect him from the mean students that picked on them everyday.

That wasn’t enough though, so his parents had to take drastic measures to ensure that their son would be better, or at least, somewhat better than how he was before.

“W-wait…so, you’re leaving? Just like that?” Andre asked in total confusion. Calvin was going to go away, away from his parents, away from the hell that was known as their school, and away from Andre himself.

“I-it’s only for a couple of weeks…it’s not like I’m going away forever…”

This was Calvin’s attempt at making a joke, but ultimately, it failed. Andre was just in absolute shock that his best friend, the one that always made him smile with a silly comment and the other half of his soul, was going to have therapy and be gone for nearly a month.

“Come on, Cal…you don’t actually have to go. We can think of something..! Just..please…”

“Please…” Andre sounded more desperate, he would do anything, absolutely anything to get Calvin to stay, he couldn’t stand to be apart from him for so long, and he knew the other boy couldn’t either.

“I’m sorry, Dre..you and I know that there’s nothing we can do about this…I’ll be back in no time, you just…have to try and make it when I’m not here..”

Even as a little boy, Andre never cried. If he scraped his knee as a child, only a high screech would come out of his mouth, if he ever got hit or punched by some other kid, he would punch them right back, there would be no tears coming out of his eyes at all.

Except for this moment. He watched as Calvin’s parents brought their car to the front, signaling their son to get in, and suddenly, fat, hot and heavy tears came pouring down Andre’s face, his lip quivering before he gave in to the flood that was crying. Suddenly, he felt like a child again, despite him never crying when he was younger. His cheeks grew puffy, his eyes glistened with every new tear that came rolling down his face.

Seeing Andre cry caused Calvin to start crying too. He was always the more sensitive of the two, crying any time he felt overwhelmed or anxious, this was one of those times. Both of them immediately latched onto each other, allowing the wetness of their tears stain their shirts. Andre placed his head down on his friend’s shoulder as he tried to silence his sobs, but it did not work.

After what felt like years of hugging each other, Calvin was the first to let go, wiping the still wet tears from his cheeks. Andre had still been overwhelmed with this, so he continued to cry, even as he watched his friend turn his back to him and made his way to the car. But before he went inside, he turned his head to him and smiled weakly.

“See you in a couple of weeks. Don’t forget about me, okay?”

And after that, he went inside, and the car drove off, leaving Andre standing there, still a crying mess. His father ended up having to pick him up, pulling him into the passenger seat before driving back to their house. He remained silent during this, only the sounds of sniffling and whimpering were heard the entire car ride back.

These were going to be the longest weeks in Andre’s life.

1 year, 1 gruesome, horrible, and miserable year goes by, and Calvin was still not back.

It was almost Christmas time, and what was supposed to be only a few weeks of therapy, had turned into a whole year of no Calvin, and Andre was getting sick of it. He looked out the window from his room, watching as the snow fell from the sky and onto the untouched sidewalk, trying to catch sight of a forest green volkswagen and blonde and fluffy hair.

But to no avail, those two things never appeared.

A few things had changed in Andre’s life during the time his friend was gone. For instance, he got a haircut. His hair had been growing too much for his own liking, so he begged his mom to cut it for him. It was a bit longer than his old haircut, but he liked it better, he always liked having short hair.

He also grew height wise. While before he stood at an average of 5 '7, during his last doctor’s visit just a few weeks ago, he was informed that he grew 2 inches total, causing him to now be 5' 9. He was still considered to be the shortest in his school, Brad Huff and every other boy was at least 5 ‘11 or even 6 ‘0, making him look smaller than he really was.

His parents bought him a cool looking camera (it wasn’t the model he wanted but he wasn’t going to say that) for his 17th birthday, and he couldn’t have been happier. He found himself recording almost anything that came as interesting. He recorded footage of his parents and of his pet cat, Mel, he even recorded a few of himself, but he wasn’t going to show that to anyone.

His acne also cleared up and he was given a set of braces for 3 weeks now, but Andre did not find the need to cheer. His parents also suggested that he too should sit and talk with a therapist, but he quickly declined the offer and said; “Therapists don’t do jack, they simply tell you to talk and they give you some lame ass reasoning so they can get paid.”

And besides, he wasn’t going to spend any more time without Calvin, 1 year was just enough.

The bullying wasn’t any better, he was still being picked on by the same people every single day, only with Calvin gone, the students were able to come up with all sorts of remarks. Just today during school, while he was walking to his next class, he was stopped by some of Brad Huff’s minions, who were laughing and making small comments about Andre.

“Yo, Kriegman! Where’s your little boyfriend?”

“He’s not here to follow you around like some dog like he always does?”

“Hm…I wonder...who’s the top in your guys’ relationship?”

Andre’s learned to just ignore those types of comments ever since he was first picked on back in 8th grade, but anytime Calvin’s name was brought up, it always infuriated the older boy, as if anytime they mentioned him, he felt the sudden urge to protect him from everyone that bothered the two.

However, one of those days was possibly one of the worst moments in Andre’s life, even worse than when Calvin left him. Brad Huff had said something so terrible to him, he just snapped. The last thing he remembered before being taken away to the principal’s office was him on top of Brad Huff, who was on the ground, taken completely by surprise. Andre had begun to beat the absolute hell out of him.

His fists were covered in the other man’s blood, as well as his shirt which was drenched in red.

Of course, Andre did not get away from this unharmed. He found himself thrown to the ground by Brad, who was clearly pissed off, and was then getting beaten up the same exact way he had done it just a moment ago.

One of the teachers had come out from their classroom after hearing such a commotion and saw the two boys punching each other. They called the other teachers, who all came running out into the hallway to break the boys apart and then take them into the principal’s office to explain why they had done such a thing.

Andre came out of the fight with a cut lip and a black eye, one that wouldn’t heal for a good 5 weeks.

When his parents arrived, they received a threat from the principal that if he continued to have this behavior, he would soon be expelled from school permanently. They apologized to the principal and the teachers for having to break up such an awful fight, but when they left the building with their son and got in the car, no words were spoken.

At least, not until they got home.

“I cannot believe this boy, can you believe this?! Why the fuck did you think it was such a good idea to beat someone up!? The principal told us that this was the last warning for you and if you decide to punch some kid again you will be kicked out from school!!!”

His father yelling at him was never something new in Andre’s life. Anything he did always caused something in his dad’s mind to quite literally explode, and he would end up yelling at his son for hours on end.

“Oh, please do not yell at him, he already knows what he has done was wrong, don’t you?” His mother tried to reason with his father, but it was no use. Once his dad was mad, there was no stopping him from absolutely going crazy with rage.

“Please, do not excuse him, what he has done was incredibly bad. This is exactly what happened back in Connecticut, he loses control, fights some kid that has done absolutely nothing, and then we end up getting called down to the office and get told that our son is out of control!”

“Brad Huff isn’t some kid that has done ‘absolutely nothing wrong’!!! He picks on me every single day!! But no! The school just turns a blind eye when it comes to this shit and leaves me on the floor bleeding like crazy!! All they see is some scrawny ass kid beating the shit out of his bully and then they decide to do something about me!!!” Andre finds himself yelling back, body fueled up with anger, he needed to release it before something happened.

“What?” His father stopped yelling, face changing from pure anger to confusion, as if this was the first time he’s heard that his son was being picked on at school.

“And you never told us this? Why, Andre?”

After realizing what he just said, he knew it was already too late. Ever since his first year of highschool, Andre had never once told his parents that he was being bullied in school. Anytime he came home bruised up, he’d just tell them that he fell, which resulted in his father calling him a klutz. But now that it was out in the open, there was nothing he could do about it, he would have to tell them everything that has happened to him.

So, he did. He sat himself down on the chair that was in the dining room, his parents followed, took a deep breath, and told them every single thing, leaving out no details. He told them the first time he met Brad Huff, who immediately told him that he looked weird and faggy and later dumped his whole drink on Andre’s head during lunch.

He then told them about the time where some of Brad’s minions shoved him into a locker, where they made him bend all the way so that he would fit all the way inside. He came out in so much pain that he left the building crying and limping, which was the first time he found his safe tree in the back.

Andre had also mentioned the time where he found out that other students began posting about him in some of their blog posts, calling him things such as: “Shit-face”, “Faggot”, “Acne freak”, “Track Freak”, “Paper boy”, and many more terrible names that he did not want to mention.

He told them all of the things he had gone through every single day, and how nobody was on his side to assist and protect him. He told them that every morning, he would grow afraid to walk into the school because he was afraid he was going to be picked on again.

“So uh...yeah, that’s...that’s pretty much everything...uhm...”

Andre hadn’t been looking at his parents at all while he was talking, so when he finished, he looked up, eyes widening slightly when he saw the shocked looks on both of their faces.

“Uh…” He tried to say, but he was cut off by his mother’s quivering voice.

“W-why…why did you not tell us all of this before…” She said in a shaky voice before wrapping herself around her son tight, tears beginning to fall from her eyes. Andre, still wide eyed, turned to his father, who sat there in silence before doing the same as his wife and hugging his son, something he hadn’t done in a long time.

Andre considered this to be the second reason why he found himself crying again, letting everything out and finally telling his parents must have been what was causing him so much pain in the first place.

After everything that had just gone down, all Andre wanted to do was go into his room and lay down for however long he wanted, just to forget this day wasn’t real. His parents allowed him to go, and while he was making his way to his bedroom, he could hear them whispering about what they had just heard from their son, and all he could do was groan.

He felt as if he should feel relieved that he finally told his parents, but a part inside of him was telling him that perhaps it wasn’t the brightest idea, he just said it because he was in a bad mood and his father yelling was not helping in the slightest.

However, before Andre could close his eyes and fall on his bed, he felt odd. He made his way to the mirror and took a quick look at himself, wincing when he noticed how fucked up his face was, red eyes, puffy face, and bruised. He also noticed the dried up blood on his shirt and jeans, which then caused him to grab something out of his closet to change.

He quickly removed his shirt and threw it into his overfilled bin of all his dirty clothes, but just as he was putting on his somewhat clean shirt, he noticed a large faded scar on the side of his stomach.

He remembered just how he got it, it was about a year ago, in his junior year, he was running away from Brad Huff and his gang as they had to chase him for no reason except he took something that belonged to Brad. While he used to be on the track team, making him faster than all of his classmates, the others were faster, catching up to him in no time.

Andre was then pinned to the ground, 4 guys grabbing a hold of his arms and legs so he wouldn’t escape. While he was struggling to free himself, screaming and shouting at them to let him go, Brad Huff walked up to him, looking down at him while holding a small but sharp pocket knife, smiling menacingly as he knelt down, grazing the object on the side of his stomach before digging it into his skin, a loud, painful yell escaped Andre’s mouth as this happened.

After they left, which was 4 minutes later, Andre painfully lifted himself up, covering his side that was covered in blood with both of his hands, and walked towards the nurse’s office to ask for a couple of gauzes.

When the nurse saw the injury, she mentioned a phone call to his parents, but he quickly denied it saying they were both busy and couldn’t arrive at the school to pick him up. He later left the nurse’s office while she was still talking to him, telling him to come back and lay down so he wouldn’t hurt himself even more.

He walked over to his tree before collapsing to the ground. He struggled to take out his medicine box from his bag and open it, but when he did, he took out a few things. A needle, a small bottle of rubbing alcohol, and a small cloth. There, he rolled the cloth up and brought it up to his mouth, he then grabbed some of the gauze the nurse had given him and poured the rubbing alcohol onto it.

He closed his eyes and bit onto the cloth before placing the gauze on his stomach. His yells and groans of pain were muffled thanks to the cloth in his mouth, and while his body was screaming at him to stop immediately, he kept going until all the blood was gone. Once it was all cleared, he grabbed the needle and the string and took another deep breath as he began to close up his injury.

Andre got hurt hundreds of times, so learning to stitch up his own wounds was not hard for him, in fact, it only took him a few weeks before he knew how to do it.

After some time, the wound had closed up on its own and he was able to (painfully) remove the stitch so nobody would know. As he remembered the terrible memory, he found himself spacing out, so the sound of something being thrown at his window definitely startled him back into reality.

He quickly put on the shirt, realizing it was one of those shirts he bought and didn’t realize the size of it until after it was purchased. Andre was an average built boy who looked a bit skinny as people referred to him, so wearing this shirt that was slightly bigger than all his other ones made him look, different.

He wasn’t able to look at himself again in the mirror before another sound came from his window. He made a noise of annoyance, walking towards his window to get whoever was knocking at his window to go away.

“Hey! Buddy! I’m getting pretty sick and tired of hearing that stupid sound from my window, so can you please move the fuck away and-”

“Awh, really? I thought you were going to let me in.”

Wait, what?

Andre looked down, that voice sounded so familiar, but it couldn’t be, right?

However, he was right. When he looked down to see who was talking, his eyes widened, his mouth gaped wide open.

It was Calvin. His best friend, his Cal, he was back, he was really back.

He watched in silence as his friend grinned and invited himself inside, making a small ‘oof’ sound when he planted his feet on the floor. He looked over at Andre, who, as expected, was still looking at him as if he was an alien.

“Surprise?” Calvin then said, opening his arms up as if it was a sign for Andre to hug him. He took that sign and ran into his arms once he realized what was going on. When Calvin wrapped his arms around him, that’s when he knew, this was real, it was all real and his friend was actually back, here, with him.

He wanted to say something, anything to Calvin, he was relieved, happy, all the emotions at once right now. But, due to his brain being stupid literally every day, the only thing that he could muster up without sounding like a total sap was,

“Am I dreaming?”

Brain 1, Andre, 0.

Calvin was the first to pull out of the hug, his face caught in surprise when he said that, and then, he laughed, something that always brightened Andre’s day, no matter what.

“Wow, Dre. Don’t even remember me? I wasn’t gone for that long,” Calvin pouted, pretending to look sad, but Andre was able to look past it and see if he was really sad or not, that’s just how close they were.

But, the more he looked at Calvin, Andre might have as well not known him, for he had changed quite a lot over the last month. His hair grew, yet he still had some strands of it tucked to the back of his ears, when he smiled, he noticed that the bottom braces he had before were gone, showing a straight set of teeth, and, he didn’t even know if it was possible, but Calvin just looked older, despite being a year younger than Andre.

He carried a black t-shirt with the text in all caps and in white that read, “ARMY” in the middle of it, and of course, he was still shorter, but everything else seemed normal to Andre. The blue eyes that matched the color of the oceans, the stupid yet sweet smile he carried around, his blonde, uncut hair that always looked so silky smooth (how does he do it?), it was still the exact same.

When they both sat down on Andre’s bed, he was still in disbelief that Calvin had returned from his sessions and was finally ready to attend school again with him.

“So, how’d the therapy go? Did they help?” Was his first question, because he had to know if they actually did something or not. But when he asked, Calvin quickly rolled his eyes.

“Hell no! They kept telling me all this bullshit and saying shit like, ‘oh how would all this make you feel? Do you think this is the reason why you’ve been depressed and shit?’ Honestly, it’s all a load of crap.”

This brought a smile to Andre’s face. His parents never believed him when he said therapists didn’t do anything to help, they always turned him away or absentmindedly listened as he went on and on about it.

“Wait a minute…” Calvin stopped in his tracks, grabbing Andre’s face with both of his hands and bringing him closer to his face, causing Andre to turn bright red. “What happened to your face? You’ve got a black eye and…and a cut lip!!”

“Oh…that…” He murmured, removing his face from his friends' hold to rub at his cheeks. “I-it was nothing. Just..fucking Brad Huff being Brad Huff. Shoulda seen the way I left him, now that was a lot!”

His laugh came out dry and short when he noticed that Calvin wasn’t laughing with him, instead, he looked worried, concerned, and Andre just couldn’t have that. Worried did not fit Calvin at all.

“Hey…listen. Don’t worry about me, this’ll heal in no time, besides, I’ve been through so much worse. Just don’t worry your pretty little face about it.”

Fuck, he let that slip out. He didn’t mean for that to come up, it was as if his brain was out to get him or something.

But before he could tell Calvin to forget what he said, he saw him smile once again, bringing one hand to touch Andre’s cheek again, his gaze softened.

“If you say so…but…I will say, you have a much prettier face than I do.”

Andre felt himself burning up, was it getting warmer in his room? His eyes threatened to look at Calvin’s palm placed on his cheek, but he stopped, his mouth slightly open in shock. They stared at each other for a few seconds before they were brought back to life.

Calvin quickly removed his hand away from his friend’s face, his own cheeks turning a bright pink. They both avoided each other’s gaze for a bit before Andre let out a small chuckle, making the blonde laugh as well.

“So, tell me what else happened during your dumb therapy sessions.”

“Oh damn, I have so much to tell you!!”

A year had passed by, and with Calvin back, it meant that everything was able to go back to normal, the way it was before he left. That meant that when he returned to school with Andre the next day, the bullying went back to including him once again.

But, he and Andre couldn’t care less, in fact, they learned to just ignore it and deal with it together. Because of this, the bullying grew less and less each day, Andre figured it was because since they no longer shouted and begged for him and the others to stop, he just got tired of picking on them and receiving nothing in return.

“Army of Two: 1, Bullies: 0” Calvin grinned. 

It was around 6:35 in the afternoon. A full year had gone by almost instantly, they were now 18 years old, and now that they had finally graduated and left the shithole and gotten away from the bullies once and for all, Calvin had decided to invite Andre over to hang out for a bit, maybe watch a movie or play a video game. But, they soon found themselves in the kitchen, trying to bake some cheesecake from scratch, specifically, Andre’s family recipe of cheesecake.

Calvin was never one for baking, or cooking. He remembered quite well that when he was just about 8 years old, he was trying to make breakfast for his parents on Parent’s day, but it ended in a disaster, with Calvin’s father putting the small fire that had appeared on the stove with a wet cloth.

Needless to say, he never tried to cook again, he would let his parents do it for him instead. But this time was different, this time he stood in the kitchen, helping Andre grab the ingredients to make his father’s special cheesecake.

Andre’s ability to bake came as a surprise to Calvin, he never would have expected Andre, the boy who would always get aggressive and act on impulse anytime someone did something he didn’t like, and the boy who just looked like he couldn’t bake for shit, just like Calvin. 

But he was wrong, in fact,  Andre looked like a professional when he was in the kitchen, he saw his friend make the crust for the cheesecake and placing it into the oven for some time and watched him grab the big bowl that was kept in the bottom cabinet, as well as the small mixer that was untouched for however long Calvin’s family had it for.

“Cal, can you pass the flour and the cream cheese?” He asked, dumping a stick of butter into a small bowl and putting it into the microwave, setting the timer and letting it melt. He quickly opened the refrigerator and took out about 4 blocks of cream cheese, handing them over to his friend while he went to grab the flour. He didn’t mind being the one to pass the things over to the person who had more experience in this sort of thing.

“Could you warm those up, don’t put them in the microwave, unless you want absolute shit in this cheesecake!” He joked, grabbing a measuring cup to scoop up some of the flour before dumping it into the bowl. His dad’s recipe was quite simple, only he didn’t use regular flour in his mixture, but almond flour, he stated that it was ‘healthier’ but it was really because he had no other flour at home and needed something in order to make the dessert.

“Right, uh…how do I do that?”

“You got warm fucking hands! Use that!!”

Calvin blushed. It was true, compared to Andre’s, he was the warmest, or maybe Andre just had incredibly cold hands, which is physically impossible to say the least. So, he grabbed one of the blocks and just held it in his hands, moving it around a bit to warm it up some more. After 2 minutes, the first 2 blocks were warm enough to be put into the batter, and he was ready to move onto the last 2.

“Damn, you got like, personal heat warmers there or something! Seriously, that’s awesome man!” Andre laughed, taking the two blocks of cream cheese and putting them into the bowl. Calvin responded with a small smile, the tip of his ears burning red at the compliment. He was a sucker for Andre’s compliments, and his laugh. Others may consider it to be a weird one, but he thought of it as one of the many charms he had.

Once the final blocks of cream cheese were warmed up and placed into the batter, 3 eggs were cracked into the batter as well as some vanilla extract to give it more flavour. Andre soon picked up the mixer and turned it on, causing Calvin to jump, just slightly. He silently watched as the mixer quickly turned from a chunky mess into a smooth cream in a matter of minutes, like whipped cream.

When it was finished, Andre turned the mixer off and removed the beaters and put them into the sink and put the mixer away. He then took the crust out of the oven in order to pour the whipped cream cheese inside, then he put it back into the oven for another hour to properly bake.

Calvin was impressed at what his friend was capable of doing, while he prepped, Andre looked immensely focused, not letting anything interrupt him. In fact, he was so sure that his friend didn’t notice the small expressions he made while he did so.

He found it cute when Andre slowly stuck out his tongue when cracking the eggs, or when his nose scrunched up after smelling the vanilla extract, or when his eyes widened ever so slightly when he accidentally got flour on his shirt. If Andre ever found out that Calvin was thinking about him in a way such as this, he would absolutely murder him. But he couldn’t help it, especially when his heart throbbed and ached any time Andre even looked at him with that ridiculously adorable face he always put on when talking to Calvin.

Calvin was so sure Andre liked him back, he noticed the longing stares his friend gave him when he thought no one was noticing, he noticed how red his face got when he leaned in too close to touch his face or how messed up his speech was when Calvin smiled at him or laughed. It was so painfully obvious, but that was probably one of the reasons he even fell for his best friend in the first place.

Andre was the puppy while Calvin was the kitty, he even had those stupid puppy dog eyes that he would use in order to get his way, but let’s be honest, Calvin was going to let him anyone, considering how painfully smitten he was for the other boy.

If only he had some way of telling him just how he felt, but he just couldn’t find the right time for him to properly do it.

“Andre, I just got a call from your parents saying that there was going to be a thunderstorm at around 7, so I just wanted to say that you might have to stay with us until the rain has stopped, which it looks like until tomorrow, you will stay with us.” Calvin’s father said, holding his cell phone in the air for Andre to see.

Today might have been the day. If God was trying to help him, then the rain might have been a sign for Calvin to just say everything he had to say to Andre and show him just how he felt about the other boy.

“Well then…I guess you’re staying the night,” Calvin breathed out, still in denial that there was going to be a thunderstorm later today.

Andre turned to him, the same dumb expression that Calvin had was plastered on his face, slowly nodding as if he suddenly forgot to speak.

“I guess so, I hope you don’t mind if I kick you off the bed.”

“Oh, haha, very funny. You’ll be sleeping on the floor.”

Andre let out an exaggerated gasp, his hand placed on his chest. Calvin let out a choked noise, trying his best not to burst out in laughter.

“Shit man! Won’t even let your own best friend sleep on the same bed as you, are we even close?” He said, pretending to cry to add on to his ridiculous act he was putting on just for Calvin. He found that his cheeks were getting warmer, just the thought of sharing a bed with Andre was enough to make his heartbeat accelerate and his body sweaty.

Andre noticed that Calvin wasn’t replying with another joke, so he added something else that made Calvin question how he wasn’t dead already.

The rain hadn’t begun to pour until after Andre and Calvin made it into the blonde boy’s bedroom. It wasn’t awkward or anything, he had entered Calvin’s room on many different occasions, this just felt slightly different because he was actually going to sleep in the same house rather than a few hour visit.

They found themselves sitting on Calvin’s bed, and Andre felt himself fidgeting constantly. Sure, he joked about sleeping on the same bed as Calvin, but he knew how he was, he wouldn’t actually make Andre sleep on the floor, but at the same time, he didn’t know whether Calvin would let him sleep on the same bed.

He grew more nervous, and he hated that. He hated feeling anxious or nervous because then he would be less alert, which would then cause literally anything bad to happen to him in the process.

So, he did what he always did to make himself not nervous and in fact calmer. He joked.

“Damn, dude, your face is getting all red. I bet you’re still thinking about us sleeping on the same bed…or, what? You thinking about getting cuddly and shit with me while we sleep? Just to clarify, I’m not opposed to it, I’m just saying that I can kick in my sleep, so you being so close wouldn’t be the brightest idea…” Andre poked again, facing the other direction, making him unable to see what Calvin looked like. 

Andre then stopped, he still hadn’t added a comment on what he said. When he turned around, that was when he saw what his friend looked like. It was fear, scared, or maybe even disgust.

And that only made Andre grow more anxious then how he was before.

“Hey, hey-” He started, walking slightly closer to Calvin to try and calm him down. “I-I was only kidding, of course! I mean, minus the kicking, I do kick in my sleep but! You can just..disregard what I said before that!!”

Idiot.

“What…? Oh…yeah..sure, no problem…” Calvin had finally said, his face no longer the shade of a tomato, but his eyes were averting Andre’s, causing him to grow worried. He knew immediately that he fucked up, he shouldn’t have said that, because now he didn’t know whether or not Calvin would feel disgusted or embarrassed to be around him.

If only it wasn’t raining so hard, Andre would usually find himself running back to his house in the rain if it was just a slight drizzle, but today wasn’t the case. He wanted nothing more than to run into his room and hide himself in the blankets, not speaking with Calvin was like being choked out, he felt himself suffocating, losing breath, heart pounding hard in his rib cage all at once.

He had to talk with him, otherwise he would feel himself closing up in an invisible box, the inability to move around or get out was growing intensely.

“So…you up for some video games?”

Oh thank god.

Calvin raised an eyebrow. “Thank god what..?” He asked, confusion written all over his face.

Andre blushed, shaking his head and smiling softly.

“Nothing, it’s nothing. Come on, I still have yet to beat your score in Super Mario World.”

His friend grinned, passing Andre the console as he turned on his game set.

“There’s no way you can beat my score of 8 537 577. But, you’re on!”

They had no concept of time at that moment, but Andre was sure that at least half an hour or even more had passed, because right as he made it to the final level with a score of 8 990 536 (Calvin was of course furious about this), they heard a loud crack of thunder followed by another loud noise, and then all of a sudden, the power cut off.

They had both now been sitting in a dark bedroom, the screen had shut off, leaving a black screen staring right at them, the air conditioner that was always on due to Calvin always feeling hot when sleeping suddenly shut off, the buzzing sound of the fan quieting down before there was nothing.

This sort of thing had only happened to Andre a couple of times, back when his family used to live back in Connecticut, they used to always somehow lose power at least once or twice a month, but his parents trained him for moments such as this. Anytime they’d lose internet or light, they would always remember to charge their devices as well as their generator.

He found that there was no need to panic in situations such as this. The thunder, sure, it made him jump a little, but it was nothing new, he was pretty much used to all of it. Andre stood up from his spot on the bed, quickly grabbing his backpack and then grabbed a flashlight from inside, checking the battery before turning it on, the room brightened up almost instantly.

“This should help, so we won’t trip and fall or some dumb shit,” Andre spoke. He was trying to talk to Calvin, but to him, it sounded like he was just reassuring himself. “You alright, Cal? Thunder didn’t like, make you crap your pants or anything?”

Calvin scoffed. “Of course not, I’m fine. I’ve been through power outages before.”

“Alright, alright, if you say so…” Andre scoffed, handing the flashlight to his friend to hold before climbing back on the bed, only this time, their elbows were touching. He didn’t know whether he meant to do that, or if it was purely accidental, but either way, his face was burning up, and so was Calvin’s.

“Right…” Calvin coughed, his face slightly red, although Andre couldn’t really tell. “What…what do we do now…?”

Andre shrugged and bit his fingernail. “I don’t know…what do you want to talk about?”

“You’re implying that I have an idea about what we should talk about.”

“Well, I don’t know! You always got that face that says you have something you want to say!”

Calvin rolled his eyes. “Well I don’t! I don’t know what you want from me, whatever I have to say I can’t say to you! So just drop it.”

“Can’t or won’t? I don’t even know why you’re keeping stuff from me, I thought we were friends.”

Andre knew when his friend was mad, it wasn’t subtle in the slightest. He could perfectly remember a time when Calvin was so pissed off, he almost broke a guy’s nose. It was well deserved, considering how much of an ass the guy decided to be towards Andre, but he had never seen Calvin so angry, he was always a happy person, almost like a golden retriever.

This was one of those moments where Calvin was seconds away from blowing a fuse. He knew he shouldn’t have ticked him off, but the boy had pissed him off first, he was always known for being twice as rude to someone who was rude to him, it was one of those icks he had that he could never get rid of.

The look on Calvin’s face was enough for Andre to step back, face softening slightly.

“Of course we’re friends, dude! Fuck! I…I don’t even know what to say. Just, ugh!!!” Calvin said frustratedly. He couldn’t find the right words to say, he was far too annoyed and angry to even think straight at that moment. Andre felt incredibly guilty about this, he wanted to stop his friend and apologize for blowing up in his face, but as he opened his mouth, nothing came out.

“I just…! I have shit that I just can’t tell you, okay? I’m not doing it because I don’t think we’re friends, because we are friends. You…you’re the only friend I’ve had that hasn’t been weirded out by me in the slightest!”

“Cal…” He managed to say, voice slightly shaky as he tried to speak.

“And even though we’re friends, best friends even, I still have to have stuff I can’t tell you! I bet you have things you don't tell me, so I don't go bothering you and asking you personal shit like you’re doing to me!!”

“I’m not bothering you! I was just trying to ask if you were alright because you looked nervous! I don’t hide shit from you because you’re my best friend! I’ve told you everything that’s ever happened to me, I’ve told you the numerous times Brad fucking Huff has hurt and tormented me, I’ve told you all the times where I’ve felt afraid or worried about what might happen to me, to you, to literally every one I care about, I’ve told you-” Andre shouted, he was about to say more until he heard Calvin cutting him off again.

“What?! Do you want me to tell you everything then?! Do you want me to tell you the things I didn’t tell you for a reason?! Because fine!!! I’ll tell you!!” Calvin shouted back, his voice now shaky and tears threatening to pour out. He was visibly shaking, his eyes beginning to look like a glass ball, shiny and extremely fragile.

“Therapy didn’t do shit to me! I’m still fucking depressed and I still think about killing myself!! People at school aren’t helping with this bullshit either, every single day I feel tormented and abused, I feel like I’ll forever be treated that way. You made me realize that ignoring those fucking bitches would help a lot, so I did that. I ignored those motherfuckers and for a while I felt better. You helped me realize that I wasn’t ready to die so young, because I wouldn’t have gotten to meet new people that make me happy, I wouldn’t have met you! You made me realize just how much I really liked you!!”

Andre stopped breathing, feeling as though time had suddenly slowed down at that very moment. He saw as the rain began to die down, leaving only little droplets falling on the pavement. Then, as if it was performed, the power had finally returned, the flickering of the lights bringing him out of his trance, along with the sound of the game they were previously playing.

When the lights turned back on, Andre could now very well see Calvin’s expression, which was shock. His eyes were wide, almost bug-eyed, his mouth agape, his face burning red, and he was so sure that his face was the exact same. They stood in silence for what seemed like eternity, neither of them moving a muscle, thinking that if they moved an inch, it would destroy anything in sight. But soon, Andre opened his mouth, a noise came out from his throat instead of words.

“Uhm…”

“...F..Forget you heard that!!” Calvin said swiftly, cutting Andre once again. Before Andre could react or even say anything else, his friend bolted out of the room, brushing past him immediately. It took him a couple of seconds, but he quickly followed Calvin to wherever he was heading.

He saw him pass the upstairs hallway, scurrying downstairs like a shadow, and then opening the back door which led to the backyard. When he made it outside, he was completely out of breath, not yet noticing the blonde boy. When he looked up, he saw that the other boy was shaking, sounds of choked sobs escaped his throat as his back was turned away from Andre’s view.

“Cal…” He tried, slowly and carefully making his way towards his friend. He then placed a hand on the other’s shoulder, softly patting him as he continued to sob.

“Just…just l-leave me alone…” Calvin mumbled softly, his voice unable to hide the shakiness of it.

“Please Cal…I just…I just want you to look at me, please?”

Andre was never one to beg, but whenever it came to Calvin, he always found himself pleading or giving him his best puppy dog eyes, it usually worked, so he hoped this time it wasn’t any different.

It took some time, but eventually, Calvin turned around, and Andre could see him better. His eyes were red, his face was puffy, and he was hiccuping. If he wasn’t crying, Andre would have found this sight of Calvin pretty adorable.

…Wait.

“What…you just wanted me to look at you so y-you can call me a f-faggot, right?”

“What? N-no-”

Really, Calvin had to stop interrupting him.

“Don’t deny it…I know you’re like, super not into gay people, especially your best friend. I didn’t mean to say that, it just…it just slipped out. I can leave you alone if you tell me, but just don’t hate me for being queer..”

“Cal..”

“I won’t tell Brad Huff or the others that I’m a fag, I don’t want you to get beaten up again..it’s just that…during my sessions, my therapist had made me realize that I really really liked you for a long time and it wasn’t just some oh he’s really cool I admire him a lot, but, I mean…that’s also very true but like, it was also just me being closeted and those thoughts about you didn’t seem to go away so I thought I was going crazy but it turns out I wasn’t actually going crazy and in fact I was just really in love with you and shit…I didn’t mean to say all that but like I just can’t seem to help it because any time I’m with you I felt like spewing out everything I had in my mind and I had to stop before I revealed anything but I guess I already did and-”

But it was no use, Calvin was rambling, his eyes averted Andre’s, and he hated it. He wanted to get his say, he wanted to stop his best friend and get him to listen to him once and for all, but there was no stopping him when he’s like this.

Except…

“I always feel my heart thumping like really fast and my stomach get all knotty if that’s even a thing, and I don't know if you even want to know this but my palms get all sweaty and I get super nervous anytime you so much as look at me because you always have that dumb smile on your face that I love so much honestly have you seen yourself because holy fucking shit. You say I’m pretty and I just wanted to tell you to look at yourself because you’re 10 times for pretty than me it’s actually crazy because I’ve never seen someone so beautiful before like the small moles on your face and your hair it’s actually insane because-”

This time, Andre cut Calvin off. He didn’t know whether it was his brain working on its own or not, but he grabbed his friend by the collar of his shirt and pulled him in with slight aggression, their lips interlocked with each other. Andre had closed his eyes, but he knew that his friend would be too stunned to close his. Something he did know was, this, this felt right.

This kiss wasn’t like any romance movie Andre has ever seen, which was like, 2-3 romance movies in total. There were no fireworks being heard, and there were certainly not spinning, but this felt so much better than those movies. He didn’t know just how much he wanted to do this, he’s always pushed the thought to the side because he thought it was weird, no guy kisses their friend.

He wanted to continue kissing Calvin, but unfortunately, the two were human, meaning they needed to breathe in order to properly function, so Andre pulled away, eyelids fluttering open to face Calvin, worrying that he completely messed up.

But, it was actually the opposite. He noticed his friend’s expression shift completely, his face was so dumbfounded and his ears were so red it looked as if they were going to blow up.

“...Woah…” Was the only thing Calvin could say, making Andre want to laugh.

“Sorry…I had to get you to shut up one way or another…” He said sheepishly, bringing his hand up to scratch the back of his head. Technically, it had worked, considering that Calvin was no longer rambling.

“You…”

“Do you…do you have any idea how long I’ve been waiting to do that? I literally had to restrain myself from absolutely tackling you!”

This caused a laugh from Andre, his head was thrown back from how much he was laughing, Calvin also found it humorous, because he too was laughing along.

“We are horrible at this!!” Andre cackled, grabbing Calvin by the shoulder to make sure he didn't fall over. Honestly, they were bound to get a medal for ‘terrible confession’ considering how unplanned all of it was.

“Yeah…but wait…do you, do you actually feel the same? Like actually, this isn’t like a joke or anything?”

Now it was Andre’s turn to raise an eyebrow, looking Calvin right in the eye.

“You…you’re an absolute idiot, you know that right?”

Calvin blushed. “I-I’m just asking!! You didn’t say it exactly, you just kinda…kissed me..oh my god that actually happened.”

Andre giggled, actually giggled at Calvin’s realization. He must have really loved blonde idiots.

“Yes, that actually happened. And yes, I do feel the same. I like you too, dingus.”

“But…what would everyone else think? What if Brad Huff and his goons come for us because we’re a bunch of faggots?”

Andre sighed. That was true, if everyone were to find out about this, they would definitely be targeted more often. But, the more he thought about it, the more he realized, he really does not care.

“Fuck them. Who cares if they come for us, we’re the army of two. It’s just you and me against the whole world.”

Calvin snorted, looking at Andre with literal sparkles in his eyes. How did he not realize this man’s feelings before? It seemed so obvious.

“Right. You and me…against the world.”

“That’s right, now come here and kiss me. I’ve still not forgiven you for leaving for so long.”

They both chuckled, bringing themselves closer every second. They looked each other in the eyes, they were the only ones that mattered to each other, nothing else in the world would bother them.

“Sure…I don’t mind.”