Archive of Our Own

Mike was the first to realize he had a crush on Will, surprisingly enough, he had been known to be dense in most areas. Especially romance. But this came to him clear as day, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. But it also involved Will, and Mike has always been particularly attentive to him so he wasn't that surprised. He did try to suppress it though, it was the '80s- things like that weren't exactly normal. So he had to pretend like nothing was there, but it was hard with Will, he could never pretend with Will. It was like everything in him made him always want to be himself with his best friend. Will was a safe place, someone who knew the ins and outs of him and still cared about him. Even when he was a major jerk, like that summer. 

Ugh, the less he thought about that summer the better. 

It had gone from bad to worse so quickly, and they had never really talked about their fight. They were fine now, but there was always something unspoken whenever they interacted. But being with Will had been as easy as it had been before, and Mike hadn't realized he liked him until after he moved. Thank god for that. 

They talked on the phone almost everyday now, and while his parents were upset about the phone bill he couldn't bring himself to care, being here without Will -and El- was hard, he would take whatever he could get. He and El talked too, though not as much, things were too awkward between them right now. They weren't on the same page and they hadn't been in a while. Plus, he was pretty sure she might've still thought they were together and he didn't know what to do about that. 

He didn't like her anymore, he was confident he never liked her in the first place, and he didn't know how to tell her that. He could barely explain to it himself. So he had to pretend with her too. He had to do a lot of pretending lately. 

But when he talked to Will, it was like he didn't have to, even if he was the person he probably had to pretend with the most. He hated that he had to do that, but was what the alternative? Telling Will how he felt and having him completely hate him for it, or the fact that he was gay? No thanks. (If he really thought about it he would remember that Will wasn't like that. But then he would have no reason to not say anything, other than his own dumb fear, and he wasn't ready to deal with that.) No matter how hard it was to keep a secret from his best friend he would have to. Because it was the '80s, and things like being gay and dating the same gender weren't okay. 

Mike was okay though, by now he had realized that the only people that had problems with it were mouthbreathers and he didn't listen to mouthbreathers. Really, he was okay with being gay, he was terrified of the people he cared about finding out, but he was okay with liking boys. Well, one boy in particular. But it had always been that one boy, hadn't it? Will really was just it for him, even if there was no possible way he could ever return his feelings. That was okay too, he was learning to live with it. 

"Michael, phone!" Speaking of Will.  

He raced down the stairs and grabbed the phone from his Mom's hand, excitedly putting it up to his ear. "Hi, Will." He said in an attempt to sound casual, he hoped he was successful. 

"Hi, Mike. You sound out of breath, did you run the phone again?" He was not. 

"Ah, you caught me. Guess I'm just excited to talk to you." His Mom gave him a look that he tried not to think about then went into the kitchen. He let out a quiet sigh of relief. "So what's going on over there? Anything new?" 

"Not since yesterday, no. What about over there? Max and Lucas back together yet?" Max had broken up with Lucas yet again, over something Mike didn't care to know about. Probably something to do with those guys he had been hanging around with recently. 

"Nope." He said, popping the 'p'. "I don't get it, why don't they just stick to something already? The back and forth is making my head hurt." Will let out a laugh at that and Mike felt his face instantly break out into a grin. That was his favorite sound in the entire world, he hadn't heard too much of it lately- and not just cause Will was halfway across the country. "Seriously, it's sooo annoying! And every time they break up Max gets in a pissier mood than usual, and who does she take it out on? Me!" 

"Well maybe if you didn't antagonize her every five seconds..." Will trailed off. Mike could practically see the smile on his face.  

"I don't antagonize her! She just hates me!" He rebutted, though his voice didn't lose its light tone. It never did when it came to Will, well, expect... He quickly shook his head and continued talking. "Like, take yesterday for example: I was just sitting there, peacefully having my lunch and she snapped at me for no reason! It was completely out of left field!" 

"I think you should give Max a bit of a break, Mike, she's had a rough year." 

He mellowed a bit at that. "Well, so have I, but you don't see me being a complete jerk." Well, actually... He had been a bit moodier than normal lately, and he did have a tendency to snap at people for no real reason, but yesterday still wasn't his fault! "Anyways, have you made a decision about the art club yet?"

The new school that Will was going to in Benton had an art club and he had been debating about joining for weeks now. Mike thought it would be good for him, and so did Mrs. Byers, but Will wasn't so sure. He was just starting to get back into his art, he thought it might be too soon to do something like that. Mike would support whatever decision he made, he just wished he'd stop stressing about it so much. 

"Oh yeah! I figured that since I'm already taking the class I may as well join the club. It gives me something to do after school, you know?" 

"Cool, think you'll have any masterpieces done by the time I come visit?" The plan was for Thanksgiving. Which was in about three weeks. Nancy would drive both of them up there for the week and they would stay at the Byers' place. Mike couldn't wait. 

"Mike..."

"What?" He said with a grin. "I'm just asking. Seriously, dude, your stuff is really good, and I'm not just saying that cause you're my best friend. You'll be in museums one day, William." He playfully teased and Will laughed. They talked for a few more minutes, about nothing in particular, before Will said that he had to go. Right, the worst part of talking on the phone to his best friend that was thousands of miles away- the end of it. 

Three weeks, he just had to last three more weeks.

"Bye, Mike." Will told him softly.

"Bye, Will." He said just as soft. He held the phone to his ear for a few more moments then put it back on the receiver and fought the urge to start crying. This wasn't fair, nothing about this was fair! Why were the two most important people in his life constantly being taken away from him?! 

"Micheal, is there something you want to talk about?" He looked behind him to see his Mom poking her head out of the kitchen worriedly.

He flashed back to that look she had given him and bit back a gulp, "No, Mom." Of all the people he didn't want to talk about this with she might be at the top of the list. He was never ever talking to her about this.

---

Three weeks later he was sat in his sister's car, bouncing his leg in nervous excitement as they got closer to the Byers' house. They were still a while away but that didn't stop him, it was like no matter how hard he tried he couldn't sit still. 

"Mike!" Nancy said after a few minutes. He forced his leg to stop. "Thank you. You're really excited, huh?" He scoffed. That was an understatement. Excited wished it could feel the way he was feeling right now. But there was also a sense of unease in him as well, this was the first time he was seeing Will since he figured out he liked him. What if he did something embarrassing in front of him? Or worse, what if he did something that screamed that he liked his best friend? Maybe he wasn't ready for this. 

No! He hasn't seen him for three months! He was going to spend Thanksgiving with him, even if it killed him. And it might actually kill him.

How was he supposed to act? What was he supposed to do? He had no idea how to deal with this, and it wasn't like he could ask Nancy. 

...It was Will, he didn't have to act any differently than he usually did. 

It was Will, if things went south he didn't know what he'd do. 

"I bet it'll be nice to see El again, I know I'm excited to see Jonathan." Nancy continued as if he hadn't gotten lost in thoughts. Right, there was also his relationship with El to deal with. During the past three weeks he had made the decision to talk to her about them and set things straight. It wasn't fair to either of them to keep all the uncertainty going. But just because he had come to that decision didn't mean it would be easy. He hoped she would still be his friend, even if it took some time, their friendship had always been so important to him. If he lost that he would be devastated. "Mike, you are excited to see El, right?" 

He looked at his sister, "Yeah, of course, I've missed her so much... but I'm also nervous." She nodded in understanding, though he was pretty sure she didn't. "I don't know where I am with her, and there are some things I need to tell her. I'm not sure how she'll take it." He wasn't sure why he was telling her this, but he did need someone to talk to -even if he couldn't go fully in-depth-, and since they had gotten closer again it was easy for him to just let everything out with her. 

"I'm sure she'll understand whatever it is. She really cares about you, you know?" Gee, Nance, not helping. 

"Yeah, I care about her too." He said quietly. "But," No. Stop talking. "I don't think I care about her like that anymore." Why? Why did he say that? 

"Oh."  

The car fell silent and Mike looked anywhere but his sister. He said too much, she was gonna find out, she was gonna tell their parents and they were gonna, well he didn't know what they would do but it wouldn't be anything good. And Will, he wouldn't get to see Will again, and somehow that hurt worse than anything else. But man did it make a lot of sense, Will was his... everything, he couldn't lose that, but now he was going to- all because he couldn't keep his stupid mouth shut. 

"That's okay." Nancy said eventually. "Sometimes feelings just fade, or change, it happens." Oh. She didn't know. He could just leave it at that and everything would be fine. "Mike," He refused to look at her, hoping she would take the hint. That was the end of it, it had to be. "Do you think maybe you lost feelings for her cause you have them for someone else?" No. Nononono. This wasn't happening, this wasn't happening! She couldn't know! He had to deflect, quickly. 

The car rolled to a stop and he felt himself completely freeze. This wasn't happening. "Mike." She said again. He violently shook his head at her. A second later he was drawn into a hug, "It's okay. It's okay." She said soothingly.

And that was when he felt himself break down.

He was just so tired of all of this, it was hard, everything was so hard. The people he cared most about moved hours away from him, he liked one of them and it wasn't the one that society thought he should, it was all just bullshit. He was so tired of bullshit.  

"You don't hate me?" He choked out a few minutes later and felt her arms tighten around him.

"I know we say it playfully all the time but I don't. I could never hate you, Mike, no matter what. You're my brother and I love you." He let out another sob, but this time in relief. She didn't hate him, she loved him. She was the best. "It's always been him, hasn't it?" She asked once he calmed down. He instantly knew which 'him' she was referring to. 

"Yeah, it has." 

"I'm rooting for you." 

That meant more to him than words could describe. "Thanks, Nance." But he would settle for that. 

---

Once they got to the Byers' new place Mike was out of the car before it had even stopped moving. He and Nancy had talked a little more and he found himself feeling much better about being there. Nancy had reassured what he already knew- that Will could never hate him, and knowing that made worrying about his behavior around him not as strong. Will had seen him at his worst, at his most vulnerable, at his lowest, and he was still there. He would always have Will, and he wasn't taking that for granted anymore. 

He barely made it two steps before he was grabbed in a hug and let himself sink into it, he'd know those arms anywhere. "Will." He breathed out. He wrapped his arms around him and held him just as tightly. This was home.

"Mike."

He could hear the noise from around them but he drowned it out, focusing only on the boy in his arms. Will. He was with Will again. Things were right in the world. "I've missed you so much." Will choked out and Mike shook his head. 

"Not as much as I've missed you, Byers." It was Will's turn to shake his head and Mike bit back a laugh. They were as stubborn as ever.

Their embrace ended in what felt like way too soon and then it was El's turn to hug him. It wasn't as awkward as he thought it would be, mostly due to him missing her too much to think about anything else, and it felt like home- but in a different way. Like Nancy or Mrs. Byers' hugs, even if he didn't have any romantic feelings for her she would always be important in his life. They ended their hug and Mike smiled at her and Will. They smiled right back. 

His two favorite people, right next to him. Life was good again. 

Will was insistent that Mike see his room and who was he to disagree? He caught the look Nancy gave him from behind Will's back and stuck his tongue out at her. Sisters. (He was so glad she was who she was.) 

Will's room was exactly like Mike pictured it would be- he had different bands and singers posters up on his walls, a desk that was littered with art and school supplies, and little glowy stars taped above his bed. "It looks great, Will, really." Will smiled at him and all he could think about was how good it was to see it again. Without needing another word they got onto Will's bed and laid down across it, staring up to at the stars. "So." 

"So." Will replied. They looked at each other and bust out laughing. Mike had missed this. "Um, you probably wanna go hang out with El, right? I-" 

Mike stopped him, "Will. I wanna hang out with you, I can go see El later." He may of been putting off talking to her, but he mostly said that because it was true. He did want to hang out with Will. They talked all the time but it just wasn't the same. 

Will looked surprised to hear that and Mike realized that summer was still affecting him more than he knew. He fought back the urge to hit his forehead with his hand. He really was so stupid sometimes. But then Will allowed a gentle smile to cross his face and Mike knew they would be okay. "Okay. Do you wanna read comics?"

So that was what they did, all the way until Mrs. Byers called for dinner. They got off the bed, or Mike tried to but apparently his legs hadn't like being bent all day and he fell to the ground. Will started laughing and he playfully shook his head. 

"Wow, Byers. Way to kick a guy while he's down." He didn't stop laughing but he did offer Mike a hand up. Mike got a mischievous look on his face before taking it and pulling him down with him. Will glared at him until they both started laughing, holding hands throughout their entire fit unknown to the both of them. A few minutes later they calmed down and Mike grew thoughtful. "I've missed this- us hanging out like this." 

Will looked at him, knowing exactly what he meant. (He had missed that too.) "Me too. Well, you're here for the whole week so plenty of time, right?"

"Right." And Mike had never been more sure of anything in his life. 

Dinner was eventful, he caught the Byers and El up on what was going on in Hawkins and his life, and they filled him and Nancy in on what Benton was like. He, Will, and El made plans to go into town tomorrow so he could get a tour and he honestly couldn't wait. He thought he might have a grudge against the town that took the most important people in his life away but they looked so happy here that he couldn't bring himself to. If they were happy he was happy for them, even if he still hated this move in the first place. He could understand why they had to do it, Hawkins... Well it was Hawkins, let's just leave it at that. 

After dinner ended Mike knew he couldn't hold it off any longer and asked El if he could talk to her. She agreed and they made their way to her room. Her's wasn't like he thought it would be, but he had discovered that the two of them didn't really know each other if there wasn't a crisis going on. He hoped to change that.

Her room had posters like Will's, but where his were of David Bowie and The Clash her's were Ralph Maachio and Madonna, and she also had a desk, and a bookshelf filled with all kinds of books. A few months ago he would've been thrown off by how girly it was but now that he had some clarity he kinda liked it. It suited her. 

"You wanted to talk?" She prompted after he just stood examining her room, not saying anything. Here goes nothing. 

"Listen, El, I've been thinking, something's changed between us, we're not on the same page anymore. I don't think we've been since we first reunited. I don't like that, I want us to be on the same page." 

She grabbed his hand and pulled him next to her on her bed, "I want that too. How, do we do that?" 

"We start being honest with each other, like really honest." He sighed. "There's something I haven't told you, anyone really, well Nancy knows now but I didn't tell her-"

"Mike." Right, he was rambling. 

"I don't want to date you anymore, El. It's nothing you did, I just, realized something," He took a deep breath. If he was doing this he had to tell her everything, well not everything, but he had to make things clear. "I'm gay." He whispered, turning away from her. "And that means I can't be your boyfriend, or go on dates with you, or anything like that. I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry?" He risked a glance at her and saw her face scrunched up in confusion. "Will told me what gay was." He did? That... was unexpected. "He said it's not a bad thing, but mouthbreathers think it is. Don't listen to mouthbreathers, Mike." 

He shook his head, "No, it's not that. We were going out, aren't you hurt by this?" She had to be, how could she not be? If he were in her position he knew he'd be devastated. 

"You can't help it, right? It's not a choice?" He shook his head again and she squeezed the hand she was holding. "You don't have anything to be sorry for. Thank you, for telling me. You are my best friend, I want you to be happy." But he had to give her more credit that, she was so strong, she could handle something like this. 

"I want you to be happy too." 

She smiled at him sadly, "I will be, eventually. I... I thought we would be together forever, like on TV. It'll take time to get used to this, but I don't want you to be unhappy. You deserve to be happy, Mike, and I deserve to do what Max says and find out who I am without you, or... Hopper." He noticed her pause but didn't say anything, now wasn't the time. "I think we work better as friends- no lying or secrets. We can still be friends, can't we?" She still wanted to be friends, thank god! 

"Yeah, yeah of course! That's all I want!" He hesitated. "But if you need time I completely get it." She nodded, 

"Thank you. Mike?" He looked at her questioningly. "You are happy, aren't you?" 

He smiled, "Really happy." And for now, that was true. It would remain true for the rest of the week. (He ignored the voice in his head that said he was technically lying to her, she didn't need to know everything.)

---

After that talk he went back to Will's room to see him working on a drawing. "I'm staying in here, right?" He asked as he watched him. Will didn't even look up, 

"Of course." 

"Good, I already brought my bag in." Will rolled his eyes and went back to what he was doing. "Is that one of those masterpieces I've been dying to see?" Mike hopped on the bed and tried to sneak a peek at it but it was moved before he could see anything. He tried to see it a few more times but it was moved away from him every time; He pouted at Will, "Come on, let me see!" Will glared at him but he could see a smile threatening to creep up on his face. 

"No, Mike, it's not done yet." He accepted that and looked around Will's room. 

"Well, do you have anything I can see?" Mike turned back to him to see him thinking. Huh, since when was he this hesitant about showing Mike something? Every time he had finished something in the past Mike was the first person he showed, had something happened to change that? "Will?" 

Will jumped, "Sorry, um, sure, but you can't look at the last page!" He hurriedly added on and Mike agreed, eager to see what his best friend had created now. Will handed him his sketchbook and Mike flipped through the pages until he came across a drawing he hadn't seen before. It was a drawing of El sitting on her bed, wearing that look she got whenever she was really content, something he hadn't seen around someone other than him until now. 

"You guys are pretty close now, huh?" Will smiled, 

"Yeah, we are." 

"I'm glad," Mike smiled at him. "You're my favorite people, I'm so glad you're getting along." He flipped to the next page as Will absentmindedly scooted closer to him. Mike tried very hard not to let how much it affected him show. 

"We kinda had to at first," Will admitted. "We didn't have anyone else here, you know, that was our age. We had to stick together at school, and with Mom and Jonathan working a lot we're here on our own more often than not. It was better than being alone, at first, but now I really think of her as my sister." Mike noted the soft tone in his voice and how he had never really used it unless it was in regard to his family and smiled again. He was so glad they had found each other. If he couldn't be physically there for them... well he was just really glad they found each other. 

He continued to flip through Will's sketchbook, listening as he talked about some of the drawings with rapt attention. Will had only gotten better in his break, but when Mike tried to tell him that he just brushed it off. So that hadn't changed either. Of all things. All Mike wanted to do was take away his self-doubt and make him see himself the way Mike did, but he knew by now that that was easier said than done. That wouldn't ever stop him from trying though. 

As promised he stopped before the last page and handed the book back to Will. He did wonder what was on that page but knew he'd get nowhere by asking, and he certainly wasn't going to look at it without permission. So he just accepted the fact that he would never know and moved on. "So, what do you wanna do now?" And that was how they ended up talking about the constellations Will had made on his ceiling. Mike didn't know much about astronomy, but it was nice hearing Will talk about it. He'd listen to Will talk about anything. 

Yup, he had it bad. But- he already knew that. 

"I'm gay." He blurted out, unable to keep that a secret from Will any longer. Will didn't say anything. "Will?" He tentatively asked, trying to hide the vulnerability in his voice. He wasn't successful. "Please say something."

That snapped him out of it. "Sorry, I just, wasn't expecting that." Will looked at him. "Thanks for telling me, it doesn't change anything between us. Obviously." 

Mike furrowed his eyebrows, "What do you mean?" 

"That I'm, you know," He did not. "I'm gay too." Oh. 

"Cool." Smooth, Mike. "I mean, yeah, that's, good to know." He finished awkwardly. Will raised an eyebrow, 

"Good to know?" 

"Like, we're in the same boat." He attempted to explain. "That we're going through this together." And maybe that was not entirely what he meant, and he hated keeping things from Will, but it was close enough. 

Will fiddled with his fingers, "Well, crazy together, right?" Mike couldn't believe it, he thought he was the only one that remembered that. But here Will was, saying exactly what he needed to hear again. He really missed that. He missed everything about Will. A week didn't feel like enough time. No amount did.  

"Crazy together. Always." That might've been too much to say, revealed too much, but he meant it. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with Will. And being without him... it had been awful, every single time. "I wish things were as easy with everyone else as they are with you and me... sometimes I feel like you're the only one who understands me. These past few months have been so hard, you know? I get why you guys had to move, but I wish you didn't. Does that make me selfish?"

"Not at all." Will said softly. "I- It's been hard for me too. I'm not used to not having you around." He admitted softly. 

"I hate every time it happens." Mike admitted just as soft. So where did that leave them? 

"We'll just have to make the most of this week." 

Yeah, that sounded pretty good. 

---

That night he slept better than he had in a long time and by the next morning he was more than excited to see all Benton had to offer. Or he would be if Will would get up already. 

"Will." He said, hitting him with a pillow for the third time. "C'mon, I'm hungryyyyyy." He whined. 

"So go eat." Will groaned out as he weakly grabbed for the pillow. Mike held it away from him. "Mike."

"Will." He repeated. Will buried his face in his pillows, probably to hide a smile. "Serious, Byers, it's like," He looked at the alarm clock. "10 already? Damn. Come on, you know if we don't get up soon your Mom'll come and make us."  

"There's no way it's that late already." Will moaned into his pillow.

"Alarm clocks don't lie." 

Will sighed, "Alright, alright. I'm getting up." And to be fair to him he did, but it took him another five minutes. But Will had never been easy to get out of bed so Mike was kinda glad for it. So far he was pretty much the same Will. Thank god. 

He liked to think he was the same Mike, that even though Will had left he hadn't taken every part of Mike with him. The only thing that had really changed about him were his feelings for Will. Or maybe they had been there for a while and he didn't realize it until he did. If he really thought about it it was hard to pinpoint when exactly his feelings had gone from friendly to something more, like it was something that just gradually happened over the years. They weren't always there, he knew that much, but he didn't know the semantics beyond that. Liking Will had come as naturally to him as breathing so it didn't really surprise him that he didn't know when the change happened. He didn't really care either, to be honest. It didn't matter to him, the only thing that mattered was the fact that he liked Will. And that he would never do anything about it. 

There was just no way Will liked him back, even if he was gay. There were never any signs, well maybe, but the two of them had always been really close. Mike didn't want to assume anything. Of course if that was the case then he shouldn't assume Will didn't like him back either. Maybe... Who was he kidding? After last summer he was lucky to have Will back as a friend, they would never be anything more. 

Benton was interesting, it was a lot like Hawkins actually. Small town with not much to do. But it didn't have the baggage that Hawkins did and that made the difference. Both Will and El looked freer there, like a weight had been lifted off of them. It was a good look. 

Eventually they spotted a diner and even though they had just had breakfast El wanted to stop in there. Mike and Will shared a look, who were they to deny her? "They have really good dessert." El added on to what she had been saying. Mike was sold. 

So, in they went. 

It was any other diner- booths lining the outer wall, a bar in front of the kitchen with those stools Holly always loved to spin in, a jukebox in the corner. It felt just like the one back in Hawkins. He wondered if it ever made them homesick. He wondered if they ever missed Hawkins as much as it missed them. 

It wouldn't surprise him if they didn't, but... some selfish part of him wished they did. Wished they missed Mike and the others as much as they missed Will and El. He didn't know, he was conflicted. He wanted them to move on from everything that had happened but wished they hadn't had to move to do so. 

He tuned back into the conversation to Will trying to explain to El that she shouldn't get a milkshake in the middle of November. El, like she did when she didn't agree with something she thought was stupid, ignored him and went to the counter to order one. "Well," Mike said, moving to a booth. "She's gonna be cold all day." 

Will followed after him, "I don't think I'm good at explaining things to her." They sat across from each other and grabbed a menu. 

"I'm not either, you should've heard the way I explained the snowball." 

"I have. 'You go with someone that you like, someone like a-', really Mike? Wouldn't it have just been easier to say boy and girl?" Well yeah, obviously. Maybe that should've been a sign. 

He looked around the dinner and lowered his voice before continuing, "Yeah but that's not always the case, you know? Not that there's anything wrong with that.”

"Of course not." Will quickly agreed. Mike smiled, he was so glad they were on the same page again. 

"I guess I was just trying to be more, what's the word? Inclusive."

"Oh. And you didn't do that cause you suspected something about someone?" Himself maybe. He did push himself on El pretty hard but now he knew that was because he thought he was supposed to have a crush on her. And with everyone putting it in his head that he did he never really stood a chance. 

"I mean myself yeah, I think I had some idea then."

Will looked surprised, "Nothing about....? You didn't suspect anything from what people used to say?" Oh. 

"You? No, I thought they just said that."

"So you didn't tell me cause you thought I'd understand?" Of course that was why he told Will he was gay. That, and the fact that he really hated keeping secrets from him. Did he mention not telling him about his feelings was killing him? But even if Will didn't understand he always understood Mike and that was what mattered. 

"I knew you would, you always do, just not like that." 

"Oh." Whatever else Will was about to say was cut off by El coming back, chocolate milkshake in hand. "You're insane. Why did they even make that for you?"

"I'm charming." She said, sliding into Mike's booth. She offered some to him but he turned her down, no way he was having anything cold in this weather. Apple pie did sound good though. "Are you guys getting anything?" 

Will rolled his eyes, "You practically dragged us in here, yes I'm getting something." Mike chuckled. He missed this side of Will. He missed Will, had he said that already? "What about you, enabler, you getting something?"

Mike looked at him affronted, "I'm not an enabler!" 

"You didn't even try to stop her!" 

"She's her own person, if she wants to be insane that's- hey!" He yelped after El hit him. "I'm sticking up for you!" 

"Not very well." He stuck his tongue out at her but was secretly glad they could joke around like this so soon. 

"I'm getting a brownie." Will abruptly said, getting up. Mike looked after him worriedly, 

"What was that about?" El didn't say anything but looked fidgety. "El?" 

"I might know, but I can't say. I promised." And Mike, Mike really wanted to push it but he knew how much promises meant to her. "He will be okay." Yeah, Mike knew that, but that didn't change the fact that something was wrong now. "He is strong." 

"Yeah, El, I know, I'm his best friend." He said roughly, not liking what she was implying saying that stuff. She huffed. The booth fell silent. 

Will came back a few seconds later but hesitated when he noticed the atmosphere. "What's wrong?" Mike shook his head and smiled at him. 

"Nothing."

After that the day was awkward and Mike hated it, he was supposed to be having a good time with his friends, but he hated someone implying he didn't know Will more. He recognized he was being kinda dumb about this, that she didn't mean it like that, but he was stubborn and so was she. So, awkward. And by the time they got back to the Byers' house he and El couldn't get away from each other fast enough. 

He could tell Will wanted to say something and that made him feel worse, he hated putting him in this position. Will hated fighting, he knew that, and yet here he was doing it. It made him feel awful. But what could he do? It was clear El didn't want to talk to him right now. "What happened?" Will finally said. 

Mike sighed, "Nothing, it was stupid." He paused for a second. "Why'd you take off like that?" 

"No reason." Right. He wanted to tell Will he didn't need to lie to him, that he could talk to him about whatever, but he knew he would turn that around on him and Mike didn't want to tell him why he was so possessive of him sometimes. So, he let it hang. 

And that was how he found himself alone. Or at least until Jonathan joined him. 

Jonathan was... interesting. Mike knew Will adored him but he had never said more than five words to Mike. He liked to keep to himself, Mike could respect that. But he did think it was a little weird they had never had an actual conversation even though he and Nancy were dating and Mike and Will- were friends. 

"Will really missed you, you know." Jonathan started out. Mike looked at him. "Your calls were the highlights of his day."

"Mine too." He softly admitted. 

"He was also really hurt by your fight." Mike flinched. God that fight. He would never escape that fight. "But he forgave you anyway. You really mean a lot to him." 

Mike fought back tears, "He means a lot to me too." 

"Mike?" Jonathan said concerned. 

"If you're trying to tell me I'm a horrible friend I already know. I know I don't deserve him, to be his friend." He quickly amended. Please tell him Jonathan didn't catch on to that. 

"Mike..." God dammit. "It's okay." 

"How?! How is it okay?" He demanded to know. "I was so awful to him! I said, I said," He can't even get it out. And now knowing that Will was gay... God he was such a horrible friend. 

"Sounds like it might've been projection." Jonathan said softly. And of course he knew, Will told his brother everything. So why was he here now? Why was he acting like this? "You guys have been best friends for ten years, one bad fight doesn't just make that go away. I won't lie I wasn't happy to hear what you said or with how you made him feel. But Mike, I know you, I know you would never purposefully hurt him. You need to know that too." 

"It doesn't matter. I still did." 

"Yeah, but you're clearly as torn up about it as he is." Which proved Mike's theory Will was still thinking about it. Great. "You wanna know what I think?" Mike hesitated but nodded, this was the person who knew Will best after him. That had to count for something. "I think you've been the best friend Will's ever had, I think that you're the type of person who stood up to bullies, parents, and even cops for him, I think you're the reason he's with us right now. I think you messed up, but are gonna do everything you can to make it up to him. And I know you should let Will decide what he deserves."   

"You don't care...?" 

Jonathan raised an eyebrow, "That you like him? No, why would I? You're a good kid, Mike, and my brother's lucky to know you." He gave him a smile and Mike thinly smiled back. Maybe Jonathan wasn't that bad after all.  

But still, the sooner he talked to Will about their fight the better. No more beating around the bush. They had to confront this. 

---

By the time Thanksgiving rolled on things were better between him and El, they had talked it out and Mike realized how better they were as just friends. Things with him and Will were... weird. Sure, there were unspoken things between them before but they were still able to talk normally to each other. Now, now something had shifted. He knew Will was no longer avoiding his feelings about their fight and Mike couldn't blame him. He wanted to talk to him about it but he had spent the morning patching things up with El and now they were eating. It had to wait until after. 

The dinner itself was nice, much nicer than the Thanksgivings back in Hawkins -though he'd never tell his Mom that-, it felt like an actual family dinner. Though the Byers had always been his second family. The food was amazing and he found himself sitting in between his two favorite people with no awkwardness at all. If all Thanksgivings could be like this it would become his favorite holiday. 

But he couldn't stay in this bubble forever and after they had pie Mike asked Will if they could talk. He agreed and they went into Will's room, El and Jonathan shooting him a thumbs up when they saw. He rolled his eyes and fought the urge to smile. This family was the best. 

He sat on Will's bed as he thought about how to start. Will joined him though kept a distance. Mike tried to pretend that didn't sting. "About last summer-" Will shook his head.

"It's fine, Mike, we're fine." 

"Are we? Jonathan said you're still thinking about it, and I haven't been able to stop. I should've talked to you before you moved, I know that, but it never felt like the right moment, and you were leaving so I didn't want to focus on the bad stuff, you know?" Will nodded. "But that was stupid and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the whole thing actually. I shouldn't have treated you like that and I shouldn't have said what I said. My relationship with El was causing me to act awful and that's why I'm glad we broke up-"

Will straightened up, "You guys broke up? When?"

"When Nancy and I first got here, you didn't know?" Will shook his head and something passed across his face. But before Mike could try to identify it he was speaking again. 

"And you're both okay with it?" 

"I am, and I think she will be eventually. I told her I was gay, that seemed to ease a bit of the pain. ...I couldn't keep leading her on like that. You know? I hated that I did it in the first place." 

"You didn't know you were leading her on though." Will said quietly. And Mike couldn't help but be struck by how amazing he was, they were supposed to be talking about their fight and instead Will was trying to comfort him. It was worrying. Only Will Byers could be amazing and worrisome at the same time. 

"Yeah, but we're getting off topic. I didn't, I didn't mean it Will, any of it. I know that doesn't excuse it but," Mike started to tear up. "You have to know I don't think of you like that. What can I do to make this up to you? I swear I'll do it, whatever it is." He brought his hand up to his face and brushed away the tears. "You're my best friend and I hate myself for hurting you." 

Will softened and looked down, "When you first said that I was hurt, I was hurt for a long time actually- before and after that. You were pulling away from me, it felt like I was losing you and I really needed you then, Mike. You had always been there for me before and it was crushing when you weren't. And then you said that and I just felt so stupid."

"You aren't-" 

"I was then because my best friend had just thrown my biggest insecurity back at me and it felt like no one would ever understand what I was going through." Will sharply cut him off. He shut his mouth. "I was then because I didn't realize my best friend was going through something really hard and lashing out. I know what you felt like in that moment, Mike, I've felt like that too." Mike's eyes softened. "How you acted and what you said wasn't okay, but I'm sorry for not seeing something else was happening." 

Mike shook his head, Will shouldn't have to be sorry, he was the one that messed up. "I didn't know something else was going on. I didn't even know I was gay until," He paused.

"After you moved." 

"Still." Will insisted, not paying any attention to the pause. Thank god. 

"Well, can we agree we both messed up and try and make up for it?" 

Will smiled, "I think that would be okay." Thank god. Will's smile grew mischievous. "Do you wanna go see if we can get the rest of the pie from Mom?" 

Mike hopped out of the bed, "There's no way El'll let that happen, but I'm willing to try." 

"Oh she'd murder us first." Will agreed also getting out of the bed. "But it's fun to try. Maybe she'll be so happy that we talked that she won't mind, I was," He hesitated. "Kinda mopey for a while." Mike chose to push down his guilt at that, they were fine, he was gonna make things up to him and so was Will- even though Mike still didn't think he needed to. They were gonna be fine.  

"I don't think she'll be that happy. Pumpkin pie is the food of gods." Will laughed. "Also I made her miss the parade earlier, I don't think she's giving me anything right now." Will tsked at him, 

"A travesty." 

Mike raised his hands up, "I didn't mean to! Our talk ran long." Somehow, though he really shouldn't be surprised- she was super sharp, she figured out he liked Will. Needless to say there was no parade for either of them. Not that he really minded, but he knew how important traditions were to her. 

"I think Mom or Jonathan taped it actually, when you guys didn't come out before it started. So she's probably not too mad at you. But she will watch it without us so..." Will ran out of the room and Mike laughed before following him.

They would be just fine. 

---

Mike was leaving in two days, one technically if he wasn't counting Friday, he didn't want to think about that. The week went by faster than he thought it would and they hadn't made the most of it. So today he was changing that. 

He woke Will up, despite the mountain he knew he would have to climb to do it- he was determined, and after they had breakfast he was practically pulling him and El out the door. "Where are we going? You don't even know this town." Will said through his laughter. 

"I have a surprise." He had talked to Mrs. Byers at some point last night and she had told him that Will and El really loved the ice skating rink. Mike couldn't remember the last time he had gone ice-skating but he knew it was the perfect idea. Luckily Benton was such a small town that they wouldn't have to walk for very long. 

"I hope this surprise is worth it, it is freezing." El said putting her hands on Will, who let out a little shriek. 

He batted her away, "Put your mittens on!" She stuck her tongue out at him but did so. Mike smiled. He was gonna miss this. No, don't think about that. Today was gonna be fun and he wasn't going to think about what he was going to do without Will or El again. He wouldn't ruin this. 

"How is it somehow colder here than Hawkins?" Mike wrapped his scarf tighter around his neck and shivered. "I didn't think that was possible unless the place was like, Antarctica or something." 

"It rains here more for some reason." Will explained. Mike mentally knocked on wood, he did not want to get rained on today. El asked what Antarctica was and Will told her as Mike got lost in his thoughts. He didn't mean to, but he just kept drifting. It was like despite his best efforts he couldn't think about anything other than the fact he was leaving tomorrow. 

Today, just focus on today. They were gonna go ice-skating and have a great time. They could deal with tomorrow tomorrow. But he really had to hand it to Mrs. Byers, he never would've thought of this in a million years. Guess there were some things he just didn't know about Will and El. He didn't like the feeling that came with that. But it was good they had people who did know those things around and after last night Mike had that too. Though it was really concerning how many people were finding out he liked Will. Was he that obvious? 

Or maybe, maybe they just knew him really well. Whatever it was he was kinda glad for it, it was easier than having to say something himself. But still, he wasn't expecting her to react how she did. 

"Ice-skating, huh? Yeah, that sounds cool." He said grabbing a mug out of the pantry for hot chocolate. "I'll fall on my face a bunch while they skate laps around me." He hesitated. "But since when is Will into ice-skating?" 

Mrs. Byers smiled at him, "I know, right? I was surprised by it too but we checked out the ring when we first moved here and he absolutely loved it. I was worried, you know, about the cold." Mike nodded. "But it was good for him and now he and El go about once a week." 

"Oh, he... didn't tell me about that." It was true, they talked about a lot every time they called each other but ice-skating had never come up. Why had it never come up? 

"Well, you know how Will is, he doesn't like to talk about himself." That was also true. "Maybe he wanted to surprise you, in which case I probably shouldn't have said anything." Mrs. Byers said with a worried chuckle. 

"It's fine." He assured her. "I can just pass it off as something I wanted to do and pretend to be shocked when he's really good at it." He put his mug in the microwave and got out a second one for Will. Mrs. Byers smiled at him again, 

"I'm really glad you're here, honey, it's been so good to see you again." 

He shot her a grin, "You too." 

"And I've never seen Will as happy as he is with you. This move was hard on him, on everybody, but especially him. And he wouldn't talk to me or Jonathan about it. I'm just," She placed her hands on the counter. "Glad you're here." 

"Yeah, he, he's my best friend, you know?" 

She gave him a knowing look, "I know." He fought the urge to panic, she didn't know, she couldn't know. She didn't even know he was gay. "You're his best friend too." See, no idea. Don't panic over nothing, Mike. 

"There's something I need to tell you." Why did he say that? She gestured to the table and they sat down. Why did he say that? Now what was he supposed to do? He could lie, he could make something up and forget about this, but sometimes Mrs. Byers felt more like a Mom to him than his own Mom. "I'm gay." 

She grabbed his hand, "Thank you for telling me." She hesitated a bit. "You know, you're, you're always welcome here, okay? No matter what." Meaning if his parents ever found out. He nodded. "Even if you have feelings for one of my kids, and not the one everyone thinks either." She knew. How?

"Am I that obvious?" 

She looked at him softly. "Honey, I practically helped raise you, I know you and I see how you are with him. It was always something special. Even more special than what you had with El." 

"That week without Will was worse than those 356 days without her." He admitted. 

Mrs. Byers smiled softly, "That's love for you." 

Holy crap, he was in love with Will. 

He felt himself stumble on the ice rink entrance steps and someone grab his arm. "Are you okay?" Will asked him concerned. 

He steadied himself and gently took his arm back, ignoring the warmth that seemed to vanish in him doing so. Push it down, Mike, this was not the time to unpack that. "Yeah, yeah, just misstepped." 

"Maybe you should not skate then." El said teasingly. 

"No I'm definitely skating." 

"Fine, but don't be surprised when we leave you in the dust." El rushed into the building and he quickly followed after her. He could do this, he could do this, he could pretend like everything was fine and he didn't just have an earth-shattering realization. But the entire time at the rink felt the most wonderful kind of torture. Every time he and Will exchanged causal touches or he smiled at Mike or helped him skate Mike felt like dying inside. It was the best and worst thing he had ever experienced. He wanted it to be over. He never wanted it to end. 

That night was not much better, it took forever for him to fall asleep, too caught up in his thoughts and the fact that Will was right there. Maybe he should've moved to the living room, but he couldn't have done that without having to give a reason why and possibly upsetting Will. And that wasn't an option again. So he stayed and suffered a fitful sleep. 

It was Saturday. It was time for him to leave. He didn't know how to feel about that. Yesterday he was so sure this would suck, and it did, but there was a part of him that wanted to get away from Will, get away and figure these feelings out. Still, when Will hugged him goodbye he never wanted to let go. 

"Call me, okay? I mean I know we did almost every day but I don't, just call me, okay?" Will said into his shoulder. 

"Of course, those calls were the highlight of my day, that's not gonna change now. You'll call me too, yeah, and tell me when you get into things like ice-skating?" Will nodded. They pulled away from each other and Mike got into his sister's car. He felt the tears fall down his face as soon as they pulled out of the driveway. 

"I love him, Nancy." 

He felt a hand on his arm, "I know, Mike. It'll get easier." 

When?

---

Despite what his sister said it did not get easier. Finding out he was in love with Will... that his feelings had changed again, or maybe it was love the whole time. Maybe he went from strictly platonic to being in love. Either way, it was a big change, like it had just become more serious. It was... harder to talk to Will, not that he would ever stop- he wasn't messing up their friendship again, but it was like there was an ache inside of him every time he heard Will's voice. He wanted something he couldn't have. 

And that was fine when he thought it was just a crush, he could live with the fact that it was unrequited -eventually- but love? That was much harder. So Nancy didn't know what she was talking about for once and he was forever stuck. But actually being in love with Will? It was probably the best thing he has ever felt. 

He was very conflicted right now. 

And it wasn't like he had anyone to talk about it with, except his sister, everyone who knew was back in Benton. So what was he supposed to do? Drown in his thoughts? He would've, but his friends that were still in Hawkins refused to let him. 

Instead they made him leave the house, and look, he cared about them very much and appreciated the effort, but it was hard to be in town when everything just reminded him of Will. But everything in his house also reminded him of Will. He was in a real lose-lose situation right now. 

So he tried to let himself forget about it and engage with the people who were around him, and it worked, but only for so long. "That would've been a better movie if Will had seen it with us." The air grew quiet. "Sorry."

Today's outing had consisted of a movie and then going to the diner. Both were fine, but they would've been more fun if the whole party were there. "Hey it's alright, man, we get it. We miss them too." Lucas said from across the booth, Max next to him. 

"At least you got to see them." Right, here he was drowning in his own sorrows and they hadn't even since them since they moved. He was such a shit friend sometimes. "But, hey, we get Christmas with them, right? Just gotta wait another month." Mike couldn't wait that long. He also didn't want it to arrive. Not so soon. He didn't think he'd have his thoughts sorted out by then. 

"Yeah, we should start planning what we're gonna do." Dustin said, reaching across Mike for a menu. Mike batted him away and slid one over. 

Lucas looked at him with disbelief, "This early? Nah, we should at least wait for December to start." And with that, the bickering started. Mike and Max shared a look and rolled their eyes. 

If he was being honest Max was never someone he thought he'd be close with, but after Starcourt and the Byers' moving they had found some commonality. He knew for a fact she and El called as often as he and Will did. Plus, it had been easy to talk to her about missing them, almost surprisingly so, but she got it in a way Lucas and Dustin just didn't. So yeah, they were pretty tight now. 

"How was Benton?" She asked, ignoring their friends who had started throwing straw wrappers at each other. 

"Yeah, it was good, a lot like Hawkin's actually. Did El tell you she could ice-skate?" 

Max widened her eyes, "Holy shit, really? That's badass." 

He lowered his voice, "She had superpowers and you think that's badass?" She shrugged. "We went Friday, they were phenoms. I was not." She snorted. "Wow, okay. We should go when they get here, it was actually a lot of fun." 

"I'm cool with it, as long as you don't hog El the whole time." 

Oh yeah, they didn't know. "We broke up actually so that won't be a problem." That caught the attention of his other friends. 

"Wait, what?" 

"Yeah, we um, weren't very good together. We work better as friends, you know? Last week was nicer not having to worry about being in a relationship anyway. It was a long time coming." He was rambling. He clapped his mouth shut before he could say anything else. 

"Are you okay?" Mike nodded, he was. Well, in terms of the breakup anyway. 

"Is she okay?" 

"I'm pretty sure, yeah, she seems happier with just being friends too." Max loosened up a little bit. "I think she noticed we were having problems too, probably even before I did if this summer is anything to go by." 

Dustin eyed him, making him jerk back slightly, "So it won't be awkward when they get here?" Oh it would be, but just for Mike and not because of El. But he couldn't tell them that so he just shook his head. 

The next few weeks were more of the same, he would get in his head about everything and his friends would force him out. His Mom definitely noticed something was going on which was something he didn't want to think about but she wasn't asking so he wasn't worrying. What he was doing was talking about Will, 

A lot. 

He couldn't help it! It was like he physically couldn't stop himself from doing it, like the words were out of his brain before he had time to register them. But, strangely, no one said anything about it. He didn't know what to make of that. According to Nancy they were used to it, according to him she didn't know what she was talking about. 

In fact, the only person really giving him strange looks about it was Max. She never said anything so he was left to assume Lucas had said something to her. But what that something could be he didn't know. He was trying not to think about it, he had enough to stress over. It was still an inkling in the back of his mind. 

It would stay there, it would stay there for as long as he needed it to, but it was still there. He didn't know why he cared what Max thought so much, they weren't that close. If anyone's suspicions about him should be in the back of his mind it should be Dustin's and/or Lucas'. But they weren't suspicious, Max was -and she was good at solving suspicions. That was probably it, the thought of another person finding out he liked Will... enough people already knew, he didn't need someone else knowing. He doubted she would care really but it wasn't about that. It was about his safety, and the more people that knew the less safe he felt. 

Which was why he should really stop talking about Will so much. But that seemed to be impossible for him. He had it bad. Maybe he should stop talking altogether, that might fix it. No, then everyone would be suspicious. 

"Christmas is coming up, you think your parents will get you an NES?" Max asked as the two of them walked to Family Video. They were hoping to bug Robin and Steve into giving them free movies, or at least discounted ones. 

Mike scoffed, "No way. My Dad'll never go for it, and Mom will say I have a 'perfectly good Atari already'." As soon as the NES had been announced he had never wanted anything more, just like the rest of his friends, but he knew it was a long shot. He has made his peace with it. "I wonder if Will will get one?" And there he went again, bringing up Will. He had it bad. 

"Oh my god, why do you keep talking about Will?! I miss El a lot but I'm not talking about her all the time. Seriously, Mike, what's up with you?" That was what he was afraid of. 

"I'm not talking about Will all the time, you're talking about Will all the time!" Max rolled her eyes. "Whatever, you don't know what you're talking about." 

"Everyone knows what I'm talking about! But all they say is it's 'just how they are', well I'm calling bullshit!" She softened up a bit, "Is it because of the Upside Down? You missing him this much?" It would be so easy, so easy to go with that. Because yeah, that stuff had been at the forefront of his mind when they first moved and yeah, sometimes he woke up and forgot that Will had just moved and wasn't missing again for a few seconds. But she would see through it because it wasn't the whole truth. 

"Maybe." 

She looked at him bewildered, "Maybe? What do you mean maybe?" 

He whirled around at her, "I mean maybe, Max! Can't you just drop it?" She held her hands up and he sighed. He didn't mean to lose his temper, this was just something he didn't want to talk about, why couldn't she understand that? 

"You were talking about him a lot before too, before you went to Benton. Honestly I'd thought you'd be annoying about El, not him." For the love of god. A free movie wasn't worth this. No amount of free movies were worth this. He should just turn around and go back home. "And this summer, you crawled back to Will, not El -Lucas told me. And when the Mind Flayer-"

"I'm in love with Will, is that what you want to hear, Max?!" Shit. 

He looked around town to see if anyone had heard but thankfully the nearest person was across the street. He glared at Max, "That... explains a lot actually." He groaned. "Hey, it's cool, your secret's safe with me." 

"With you, and my sister, and most of the Byers," 

"Holy shit, you are terrible at this!" 

His glare deepened, "Thank you. I wasn't aware." He gritted out. She softened up again, 

"Really, I don't care, Mike. About any of it. As long as you're a better boyfriend to Will than you were El." And god, he's not even entertaining that thought. 

"That's not gonna happen, there's no way Will would ever like me back." 

Max smirked, "Where there's a Will there's a way." He swatted at her. "Seriously, maybe you've got more of a chance than you know." He snorted, not likely. Mike knew exactly where he stood with Will. They were only friends, best friends, he would be okay with that. There was no other option. 

---

A month had passed. A long, excruciating month had passed. The Byers would be there today, and Mike, Mike was not ready for it. Was he excited to see everyone? Of course. Was he doing better at accepting Will would never love him back, not like that at least? Yeah, actually. He hadn't fully accepted it yet but he was a lot farther along than he was a month ago. Was he ready to be near Will, to exchange smiles and casual touches once again, to have to see all the knowing looks? No, nowhere near ready. 

But god was he ready to see Will. 

The phone calls weren't enough, they never had been, and over the month the ache had shifted from hearing Will's voice to not. So, he had to be ready for the rest. 

The Byers were staying out a hotel, there not being enough room for everyone at Mike's house, and he was honestly kind of glad for it- though he was planning one stealing Will and El for at least one Party sleepover. They were also planning on going to the rink and the Palace at least once, and of course having a Christmas for just them. Mike had already gotten presents for everyone and he knew for a fact everyone else (besides Dustin) had too. It would be interesting to see what he could come up with this late. But of course none of this happened until the Byers actually got there. 

They were coming to Mike's before going to the hotel, as they were planning on having dinner there. Mike had to practically threaten the others into not coming over. There was no way he was dealing with that many people. And he didn't think either family would be too keen on that either, especially the one who had just had a 6-hour drive. The rest of the party could see Will and El tomorrow. 

A car pulling up in the driveway broke him out of his thoughts. Finally, they were here! He fought the urge to run out there and instead waited for the doorbell to ring like a normal person. It did, but Nancy answered. 

"Hey! You guys are finally here!" She said as she hugged Mrs. Byers. 

"We got a late start." Jonathan explained, pulling her into their own hug. Mike grimaced and turned to his friends, his face instantly becoming lighter. God, he had missed them. 

He embraced each of them, his one with Will lasting longer, and smiled at Mrs. Byers. "You're just in time for dinner. Mom made lasagna." 

El pushed past them, "I am starving!" She said dramatically. Will rolled his eyes.  

"You ate like an hour ago." 

"Chips are not food." 

"Well," Mike started but was interrupted by his Mom coming into the room. She and Mrs. Byers broke into an adult conversation while his sister and Jonathan began being gross. He simply ignored all of them and led his friends into the dining room. "How was the ride? When Nance and I went up it was torture being in a car with her for that long."  

"I mostly slept." Will said. "And I don't know if I'd call it torture exactly but El did insist on stopping every hour." 

"I needed to stretch my legs. Oh!" She turned to Mike and grabbed his arm, "Did you know they make caramel popcorn? It is very sticky in your mouth." 

Mike sat down at the table, "Yeah, I've never been a fan. Things should be salty or sweet, not both." 

El nodded seriously, "Exactly." She was about to sit next to Mike but then shot him a mischievous look and sat across instead, leaving the seat to Will. And it began. "Chips make sense, they are only salty." 

"I like chips!" Holly broke in. "My favorite are sour cream and onion!"

"Sour cream and onion?" El asked astonished. Mike shot a look towards Will, who was trying not to laugh. He smiled when he noticed Mike and Mike tried to keep his returning smile from being too big. He changed his mind, he wasn't ready to see Will. He wasn't sure if he could get through this visit without screwing anything up, he wasn't even sure if he could get through this dinner. 

Mom brought the lasagna in and that was when he noticed everyone else had sat down too. This was going to be a long night. 

He was quiet for most of dinner, letting the adults steer the conversation and exchanging bored looks with El and Will. He was glad they were here, but this is not how he was looking forward to spending his first day, well technically night, in over a month with them. Hopefully they would have time to hang out before the Byers had to go to their hotel. 

"So Micheal, this is a pretty romantic time of year. Do you and Jane have any special plans?" His Mom suddenly asked. 

Mike felt himself freeze. He hadn't told his parents they had broken up, and why would he? It's not like they were ever overly invested in his life. He was regretting that decision now. "No, we uh, broke up actually. So... no plans." He said awkwardly. 

Her face dropped, "Oh, I'm, sorry to hear that. What, what happened? If you don't mind me asking that is."

"Yes, Micheal, I would like to know as well." His dad interjected. 

The air was so thick you couldn't cut it with a knife. He glanced towards the living room in some foolish hope of escape and opened his mouth but nothing came out. If he told them the reason they would start asking questions, suspecting things. They would put the pieces together, or at least his Mom would, and he was afraid of what would happen if that happened. The other people who knew knowing was not the best but his parents? A recipe for disaster. 

Nancy shot him a look, "He doesn't have to talk about it if he doesn't want to." She said in an attempt to save him. 

"I'm not sure this is the best time for that conversation." Mrs. Byers cut in. "Karen, weren't you telling me about your jazzercising classes?" His Mom let herself be drawn into that conversation but his dad gave him a suspicious look. Mike felt something grab his hand under the table and looked to see it was Will's. He clutched it back, right now wasn't about his feelings for Will. He needed comfort from his best friend. 

He had a feeling this wasn't over. 

---

He had been right, as soon as the Byers left his parents were hounding him about the breakup. Nancy had to end up distracting them while he went upstairs, he could not deal with that. 

The next day he was out the door before he even had breakfast. 

Okay, sure, most of that was to get away from them but he was also really excited to hang out with the whole Party again. And get his mind off his parents possibly finding out he was gay. They had agreed to meet at his place so he wasn't surprised to see everyone waiting outside, avidly catching up with each other. 

"Hey. Thought we were gonna start the day here?" Lucas said when he noticed him. The others, sans Will and El, also looked confused. 

Mike shrugged, "Outside is here, is it not? We should get to Palace before all the good machines are taken." He added on before anyone could answer and fell in step with Will who gave him a questioning look. He shook his head. Will's face softened with worry and he squeezed Mike's arm. El also shot him a worried glance which made Max furrow her eyebrows and turn towards the house. She was about to open her mouth when Mike sent her a pleading look and shook his head. She shut her mouth and smiled in understanding, falling into a conversation with El about something. 

But he knew she wouldn't drop it, that none of them would, and eventually he would have to confront what happened. Or what could've happened. That was for later though, right now he was just gonna focus on his friends. 

"Can you believe some kid took my high score on Dragon's Lair?" Lucas complained as he and Dustin came up next to him and Will, not having seen any of the silent conversations. 

"Considering you haven't played in a year, yes." Will replied making Mike snort. "Well, there's always today to reclaim it, right?" Lucas smiled at that and the four of them fell into a conversation about which game they thought was the best. Lucas still said Dragon's Lair but Will said Dig Dug and Mike was inclined to agree with him, there was just something nice about the simplicity of it. And that was when Max jumped in saying Galaga was the best, which made the original Party look at Mike, they knew how much he detested that game. 

"You're saying that on purpose, aren't you?" 

"Well, duh, it's the best." Mike glowered at her. "What? You can't be saying it's not." Yes he could, actually, and he would until the day he died. "Seriously? Wow, Wheeler, who knew you had shit taste in games too?" 

"What do you mean too?!" If she was implying he had shit taste in movies or music... 

She gestured to his body, "Have you seen the clothes you've been wearing?" He looked down, what was wrong with his clothes? They were standard winter clothes and more importantly they were ones his Mom hadn't picked out. 

"Sorry I don't want to freeze to death. My clothes are perfectly fine." 

"Alright, fine, a real test. What's your favorite game then?" 

Mike wrinkled his face, didn't he...? "I said it." 

"You didn't, you just agreed with Will." 

"I agree with Will on everything." Too thick, Will was right there. Will was, smiling at Mike, in a way he couldn't quite place. It kinda looked like the way Lucas smiled at Max when she was being particularly spirited but he couldn't get his hopes up like that. It couldn't be that, Will didn't like him back.  It was just because he liked what Mike said, nothing more nothing less. 

"Favoritism." Dustin said jokingly. 

"Uh-huh." Mike absentmindedly agreed, more focused on figuring out how to one-up Max. He quickly dropped it though, he was here to have fun not a competition. 

Dustin pointed at him, "Ah-ha! You admit it!"

Mike wrinkled his face again, "It wasn't a secret." It really wasn't, Will had been his favorite person ever since they were 5. Granted, he hadn't had too much competition then but even as he made more friends over the years Will had remained in that spot. Mike didn't think he was ever leaving, romantic feelings or not. Will just got him, in a way no one else did and- he really had a problem, didn't he? What was it about love that made it hard to think or talk about anything other than the person you were in love with?

Why was Dustin looking at him like that?

He didn't get his answer until they got to the arcade and he was immediately pulled aside. By Dustin. This oughta be good. 

"You're in love with Will!" What? 

"What? Just cause I said he's my favorite?" If that was all he was basing this off of.... Well, romance had never really been Dustin's forte. "You don't even know if I like guys." And why this one was the one he was fighting he didn't know but he didn't like that he was this easily figured out. Plus, there was Dustin's reaction. Even if the others were good that didn't guarantee Dustin's would be. 

"No, well, kinda." He said, answering the first part of his statement. "It put some things in perspective." 

What was he talking about? "Either way, you shouldn't assume things like that, and what if someone heard you?" They were in a remote corner, but what if it wasn't remote enough? "This isn't the kind of thing you talk about in public, you couldn't have waited?" 

Dustin had the courtesy to look sheepish, "I'll admit I didn't completely think this through but come on, Mike, you're telling me you don't have feelings for Will?" He couldn't keep fighting this. 

"I do." He admitted shortly. "Look, I don't wanna talk about this right now, can we just go back to the others?" Talking about it meant remembering last night and he didn't want to do that. Dustin must've seen something in his face because he uncharacteristically dropped it. Mike would say he was getting tired of the pity but if pity meant not talking then he was fine with it. Now if he could only stop thinking about it.  

"What did Dustin want?" Will asked when Mike joined him at his machine. Mike thought about how to answer that, he didn't want to lie to Will but he couldn't tell him the truth. Or the whole truth anyway. But if he told Will that part he would ask how Dustin figured it out, and then Mike would be back at square one. 

"Yeah, he was, uh, asking about what I thought he should get you and El for Christmas." Will squinted his eyes at him suspiciously but didn't say anything. Thank god, he forgot just how bad he was at lying to Will. Instead, Will asked him if he wanted a turn on Dig Dug. Mike agreed. 

"So I'm your favorite, huh?" Will said with a smirk. Right, that. Was there a way for him to sink into the floor? 

"You knew that, you have to have known that." 

His smirk grew wider, "I have to have, huh?" Mike chose not to dignify that with an answer. "It makes sense I guess, you know, since we've known each other so long." Exactly! It just made sense for Will to be his favorite. It was nothing for Dustin to draw a conclusion from. Why was he still thinking about that? 

"Right, which means I'm your favorite too, right?" Will didn't say anything. "Right?" He still didn't say anything. "I can't believe it! After all everything we've been through!" Will started laughing. "The nerve, William, the absolute nerve." 

"Don't worry, Mike, you've always been my favorite." He said through his laughter. Mike froze. That, oh. Okay. That was, interesting. Why was this affecting him so much? It meant nothing. It meant everything. It meant his game ended. He had gotten distracted. "Geez, play much?" Will asked teasingly. 

Mike lightheartedly rolled his eyes, "Shut up. Your turn." Will started playing when Mike's stomach suddenly growled. Right, in his hurry to get out of the house this morning he hadn't had breakfast. Will looked at him concerned. "Forgot to have breakfast." He explained, hoping Will wouldn't question it any further. 

No such luck. Before he knew what was happening he was being pulled over to the snack bar. It wasn't a feast, but it would do he guessed. 

He ordered some mozzarella sticks and the two of them sat down at a booth, they were quickly joined by El and Max. Mike sighed inwardly, no more avoiding it apparently. 

"How did this morning go?" El carefully asked across from him. 

He shrugged, "Left the house before they could say anything. I don't, I'm hoping they'll just drop it, but I don't think that's likely. But what am I supposed to say? Tell them their only son's gay? That'll go over well." 

"Wait, so what happened exactly?" Max asked. He left the other two to fill her in while he got his food. The less he had to talk about it the better. "That's such bullshit! Why should they care why you guys broke up? They don't need to know every little thing about your life." She said as soon as he got back to the booth. Which, wasn't exactly wrong. 

He took his spot back next to her, "Thanks." And opened the marinara sauce, accidentally spilling some on the table. Of course.  

"So what're you gonna do?" Will passed him a napkin. "You can't just avoid them forever. They're gonna keep asking questions." Will was right, this was the one time Mike hated it. 

"Well, you could for a few days, let it die down." Max suggested. "You could stay with... Lucas, or Dustin." That was a good idea, but he'd probably have to give them some idea why. He could do that with Dustin. He probably wouldn't ask too many questions. But, he was supposed to be having the Party's Christmas in his basement, and he knew his parents- the more he avoided them the worse it got. He had to face the music. 

"No, I'll just, think of something to tell them. Hopefully they won't suspect anything, I just have to do damage control." That shouldn't be too hard, his dad rarely cared about anything going on in his life, if he gave him a convincing enough story he would drop it. And his Mom, she'd probably latch onto the first thing that proved her son wasn't queer. 

"I know you guys missed them a lot but they're our friends too." Dustin suddenly cut into the conversation. The four of them looked at him, and Lucas, then each other. They had been gone longer than they thought apparently. "What'd we miss?" 

"Nothing." El quickly said, getting out of her seat. "Dustin, I want to learn how to play Asteroids now." He let out a whoop and they went over to that machine, Mike shooting her a thankful smile as they did so. 

Lucas sat next to Will and took one of Mike's mozzarella sticks. "Why are you having these at nine in the morning?" Mike rolled his eyes, 

"I don't judge your life choices." Lucas barked out a laugh at that, making him roll his eyes again. "Whatever. I'm hungry, alright?" He pulled the basket closer to him. "So stop taking them." 

Lucas put his hands up, "One, I took one."  

"One too many clearly." Max said also taking one, ignoring Mike's 'hey!'. "So how long are we gonna be here? Cause the machines are already getting taken and I don't want to sit around all day waiting." 

"Did we have anything else planned today? El and I are here till New Years, no need to cram everything into one day." Right, they were leaving again. Don't think about that Mike, they were here now. That was what mattered. Will sent him a sad smile as if understanding what he was thinking and Mike felt himself melt inside. He had really missed being that known. It wasn't like he had ever gotten it from anyone else. No wonder he fell in love with Will. Not that he only loved him because of what he did for him! He loved Will for so many reasons, almost none of them selfish. It was just... easy with Will. Everything. And that should be the person you're with, where life is better with them.

Oh wait.

---

When he got home that day it was to his parents waiting in the living room. He thought about avoiding them again and heading up to his room but knew that wouldn't do any good. 

"Are you finally ready to talk about this?" His Mom asked as he joined them. 

"There's nothing to talk about. We just decided we weren't working out anymore." He hoped that would be the end of it, but it never was when it came to his Mom. 

"And when did this happen?" 

"When I went to Benton." 

His Mom's eyes widened, "Micheal, that was a month ago! Why haven't you said anything?" 

"Why should I have to? It's none of your business!" He shot back. She glared at him, 

"Micheal, I am your Mother, I have a right to know what's going on in your life. I'm worried about you, you never tell us anything! We don't know what you have going on, we don't know how your friends are, we don't even know how you are! Can you blame us for being concerned?" And that... That wasn't fair. 

He slumped down, "You don't ever ask." 

"That's cause you're just supposed to tell us stuff, son." His dad finally contributed to the conversation.

"Ted." His Mom looked back at him and sighed, "Okay, you want me to ask I'll start asking. Please just talk to me, Micheal." She pleaded. Talk... if she was willing to try, he knew his father never would, he could talk to her. He wouldn't tell her everything but he could admit he could stand to be more open about some stuff with them. She didn't have a right to know what was happening in his life but that didn't mean he had to keep everything from her. 

"Yeah, alright, but there's nothing more to say about this. We just fell out of love." Mike lied. 

"Are you doing okay?" He felt himself inwardly sigh in relief, she didn't think anything else was going on. Thank god. 

"I'm fine, I've been fine. It was a long time coming I guess." Understatement of the year. Their relationship should've never happened in the first place. "Can I go upstairs now? I wanna take a nap before dinner." She nodded and he left. That was... easier than he thought it would be. But he had a suspicion it wasn't completely over. But for now, he was fine. 

Things with his parents were strained after that but he was so busy with the Party he paid no attention to it. They went to the rink and the quarry and all over town, and days up until Christmas Eve he had spent most of the day out of his house. His mom asked about what they did and he told her but they didn't have many interactions beyond that. She was trying and he appreciated that but he didn't think he'd ever get to the point where he'd spill his entire guts to her. It sucked, but he had to protect himself. His dad was as absent as ever. 

But on the evening of Christmas Eve he and the Party were in his basement to have their Christmas and it was going as well as he thought it would. Meaning they had been there thirty minutes and had been horribly distracted for twenty of them. But he didn't mind, they had all night. And, Will got to spend the night so that was a plus. The Byers were having their Christmas there so it just made sense for him to invite Will to sleepover (El was staying over at Max's for the night).  

"Can we open gifts now?" Max asked. "We're out of snacks." El lit up at the idea so everyone instantly agreed to it. 

As he suspected Dustin's gifts were very last minute, in his case it was a Star Wars figurine from Melvald's, but Mike wasn't ungrateful so he thanked Dustin through his concealed amusement. He could tell the others were doing similar things with their own gifts from him. Mike's other gifts were more... planned though, he got a journal (El), a DnD handbook (Lucas), and a Wonder Woman comic (Max), but his favorite gift was from Will. 

Instead of a drawing, which had been tradition since they first met, it was a painting. It was the original Party fighting a three-headed dragon as their DnD characters, his leading the charge with his sword and a shield covered with a crowned heart. It was amazing. 

Will was amazing. 

"Do you like it?" Will asked him softly, the others preoccupied with their own gifts. 

Mike turned to him and smiled, "Like it? Will, this is the best gift I've ever gotten!" Will matched his smile and Mike handed him his gift. "I don't think this'll be as good, but I hope you like it anyways." He unwrapped it to reveal a mixtape. He didn't say anything. "I don't know much about music, or how to make mixtapes but I thought it'd be nice. Jonathan taught me how to do it when I visited you guys but I don't know if I did it right or if it's music you would like but it reminded me of you-"

"Mike." Mike shut up. "This is the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me, thank you." 

"Of course." He said softly. "Maybe we could listen to it later, after everyone leaves?" 

"I'd like that." 

After everyone had opened their gifts they decided to put on a movie and after El confessed she hadn't seen any Dustin was demanding they put on The Grinch. Of course, since most of them had seen it a million times they had fallen into a quiet conversation. "But why wouldn't he just say something?" Lucas was asking about Steve, who was currently crushing hard on some girl. 

Will looked down as if in deep thought, "It's scary, putting your heart on the line not knowing how the other person will respond."

"Terrifying." Mike agreed, looking right at him. Luckily he didn't see, but Lucas did. Of course he did, why wouldn't he? It wasn't like Mike was good at keeping his feelings for Will a secret! Don't tell Max he said that. Lucas didn't say anything, but he did raise an eyebrow at Mike. 

Something must've passed on Mike's face because he then softened up and gave him a small smile. He was okay with it. He looked at Mike then Will then back at Mike and shot him a tiny thumbs up, gesturing at him to go for it. Mike shook his head, no way in a million years he was doing that. Lucas didn't do anything else and turned back to the conversation. Mike followed his lead. 

It wasn't brought up again, not until the others were leaving. 

"Seriously, Mike, tell Will how you feel."  Lucas said when it was just the two of them at the front door. 

"He doesn't like me back, Lucas, there's no way he likes me back." Mike protested and maybe he was beating a dead horse at this point but he had to keep reminding himself of that. He couldn't give himself hope. Wouldn't. It wouldn't be fair. 

Lucas sighed, "I know you and I know him, you have a better chance than you think." 

"I can't." 

"Can't, or won't?" He countered. And that was one of the things he loved and hated about Lucas, he always knew how to call Mike out. "Okay, you're scared to put your heart out there in case you're rejected, I get that, but are you honestly saying this is better? You're so convinced he won't like you back you won't even give yourself a chance, that's not a nice way to treat yourself Mike." He said softly. Could he be right? Was his insistence of Will not liking him back based more on his own self-perception than his view of Will? "Just think about it." He added on when Mike didn't say anything. 

"I will." Mike promised. He didn't think he would stop thinking about it. Lucas clapped him on the arm and took his leave. 

Mike headed back down to the basement to Will setting up the mixtape. "Sorry, I'm just really eager to hear this." He said when he noticed Mike. Mike waved him off. 

"So where do you think I should hang my painting? Cause there's," He glanced around the basement walls. "No room down here." 

"Well maybe if you took some of my drawings down," Mike let out a gasp and clutched his chest. Will laughed. "I don't know, Mike, anywhere you want it I guess." 

"I'm putting it in my room." 

Will tried to protest, "You don't have to-" 

But Mike wasn't having it, "You said anywhere I want, and I want it in there. I wanna be reminded everyday that I got given the best gift ever by the best artist ever." Will rolled his eyes, 

"Okay, now you're overselling it. Can I play this?" 

"Whenever you want." He replied, hoping he didn't sound as nervous as he felt. He hoped Will liked it, it was, very personal. Maybe the most personal thing Mike's ever made. And the fact that this was usually a romantic gift was not helping his nerves. He was just letting what Lucas said get to his head, Will wouldn't take it like that. 

But Hand in Glove was on there. 

And so was No One Like You. He was not being subtle about this at all. But maybe he was done being subtle. Maybe Lucas was right and he should give himself a chance. Cause there were signs, especially lately. Something had changed between them since they had come out to each other. Or shifted more precisely, back into how they had been before all this Upside Down business. It was nice. But the shift did come with something new, the air felt more electric around them and being alone had a weight it didn't have before. He really didn't want to assume things, not when it came to Will, but things were pointing towards his feelings being mutual. 

And he clearly wasn't the only one who noticed. Jonathan and Lucas thought it, and El clearly knew something Mike didn't. (He was trying not to think about that part or he'd drive himself crazy.) Maybe he should get his hopes up, maybe he should want something for himself for once in his life. 

Will hadn't said anything for five minutes. 

"Will?" He asked softly. "If you don't like it you can say s-"

Will looked at him, "I love it. This... this is incredible." Mike tried to brush him off. He was just being nice, Jonathan was probably a lot better at making them than him. "No, I mean it. I can't believe you made this for me." 

Mike shrugged and sent him a tiny smile, "I wanted to do something special." 

Will grabbed his hands, "It is. It really is." Mike looked down at them and Will started to pull away but he held them tighter before he could. He never wanted this moment to end. Holding hands with Will, being with Will, it was like nothing else even mattered. Like nothing existed but them. He wanted to always feel like that. "We should, um, get ready for bed." Right. Will squeezed his hands then reluctantly let go and went over to his sleeping bag. All Mike could do was stare at him. 

He wanted to tell him.

---

Christmas Day came with a surprise. Everyone was opening presents when the phone suddenly rang. Mike's Mom got up to get it. "Joyce, it's for you." Mrs. Byers sprung up and rushed over to the phone. Mike, Will, El & Jonathan shared a confused look. What was going on? 

"Are you sure?" She asked the person are the other side. "Are you really really sure?" She fell silent. "Yes of course I believe you I just-" 

"Mom?" Jonathan asked her. She held up a finger. 

"Okay, okay, I understand. What do you need me to do?" She looked at her kids. "I can't leave, Murray-" 

"MURRAY?" The four of them shouted. Mrs. Byers waved her finger. They fell silent, but El went over to her. 

Mrs. Byers wrapped an arm around her, "Come to the hotel we're staying at, we'll be there as soon as we can." Murray said something else and she hung up. She started gathering the presents and gestured for her kids to get up. "Okay, I can't really explain right now but we need to go. Karen, thank you for having us, I really appreciate it. Sorry for having to leave so soon." 

"What's going on?" El asked her softly. She stopped and gently touched her arm. 

"I can't say right now, but I promise it's worth it." Mike and Nancy exchanged a look. If she couldn't say in front of their parents it had to be Upside Down related. They followed them to the front door. 

"Keep us updated." Nancy told them and Mrs. Byers nodded before giving them both a hug. They couldn't go with the Byers, not without raising suspicion so that would have to do. Mike hugged his friends and Will promised to use his Supercom to let him know what was going on. They left after that and Mike and Nancy headed back into the living room. 

His Mom blinked, "Well that was weird." Understatement. 

He spent the rest of the day by his Supercom and after filling the rest of the Party in on what had happened he was sure they had theirs nearby too. But no news came until that night. His Supercom started crackling and he whisper-yelled at Nancy to get in there. Once she did he turned it on, "Will, what's going on? Over."  

"Uh, that's kinda hard to explain." He didn't say over so Mike waited for him to explain. "Have you told anyone about earlier? Over." 

What did that have to do with anything? "Just the rest of the Party. Over." 

"Okay, well, you can't tell them anything right now. The only reason I'm allowed to make this call is so you guys won't worry. Over." Not tell the rest of the Party? Their number one rule was 'Friends Don't Lie' but if El wasn't protesting this it had to be important.

"Okay. Over." 

"Hopper's alive, Mike. My Dad is alive." El's voice came through the Supercom, sounding happier than she had in a long time. Mike felt himself smile, true he had never really been Hopper's biggest fan, and vice versa, but he was just as upset as everyone else was when he heard he died. "Will said to say over so you know I'm done talking. Over." 

"El, that's great! I'm really happy for you! Over." 

"Thank you! I will try to hang out with you and the rest of the Party while we are here but I do not know how much I will be able to." A voice spoke up in the background. "I have to go now. Here is Will. Over." 

Nancy took the Supercom from him and he tried to grab it back but she held it away from him. "Will, not that this isn't great, but how is it possible? Over." She added exasperatedly at Mike's look. 

"Apparently he got into the Upside Down before the Russians' machine exploded and he's been surviving there for the past few months. Another gate opened and he got out, running into Murray who was apparently investigating the area for suspicious activity. The gate closed so they don't think that'll cause any problems but... well someone has to keep an eye on things. And Mom said not to get our hopes up but," Mike and Nancy shared a look and leaned closer to the Supercom. "We might be moving back. Over." 

Mike refused to get excited, not yet. Not until they were sure. "Might be? Over." 

"Her and Hopper are talking about it. He shouldn't be moved too far in the state that he's in and El obviously won't leave his side and they're both family so we don't wanna be separated, again. And well, someone needs to keep an eye on things. Over." That... sounded promising. He could actually have Will and El back in his life more than phone calls and seeing each other at holidays. It had only been a few months but they were the hardest months of his life. And now they might be over. "Mike, I have to go. I'll see you tomorrow, yeah? Over." 

"Sounds good, over and out." He switched off his Supercom and turned to Nancy who was smiling. "Come on, Nance, we shouldn't get excited yet." 

She nodded and schooled her face. "I know, I know, I just, it's been so nice having Jonathan back here. I didn't think I'd miss him as much as I did." 

"Yeah, me either." He wasn't talking about Jonathan and they both knew it. "I mean I had some idea, but this time is worse for some reason." Nancy's face softened and she gave him a hug. Her hugs always felt more special than everyone else's, even Will's. Almost like what his Mom's were supposed to be. Nope, shut that one down. 

Will and El might be coming home, focus on that. He didn't wish for much, not really, but he wished for that more than anything. Hawkins wasn't home without Will.

Luckily fate was on his side for once and the Byers were moving back by the end of January. There was a lot to work out according to Will but there was no reason for them not to. Especially now that everyone knew Hopper was alive. The original Byers decided to head back to Benton early but Mike couldn't find himself to be too upset about it since they would be back for good soon. He could wait a few weeks.  

It wasn't like he wasn't busy- between daily phone calls with Will, helping El and Hopper set up the new house, and hanging out with the rest of his friends he had never been more busy. So busy that he hadn't talked to his Mom at all. Look, it wasn't like he didn't want to he had just been, busy. Yeah, it was a lame excuse and he knew it. The truth was it was hard, it felt like she would see through him at any second. He wasn't exactly hiding how happy he was that Will was coming home. 

But, still, he tried to tell her something. Small conversation seemed to work best for them, she would ask how he was and what he was doing that day and he would tell her. And that was the end of it. It was for the best, that was what he would keep telling himself. 

But he couldn't dwell on that, he had other things to focus on and the closer and closer it got to Will coming home the more that was all he could focus on. He couldn't help but think that this was his second chance, his opportunity to tell Will he was in love with him. He was scared of doing it, terrified, but the thought hadn't left his head since he had first had it. 

He was going to give himself a shot, he knew that as soon as he saw Will again.

---

Since Will had gotten back to Hawkins Mike had been spending all of his time with him. Not that Will was complaining. Or Mike. The only people that seemed to be complaining were Hopper and his Mom. He didn't know what Hopper's deal was but he figured it had something to do with him and El breaking up, even though she had told him a thousand times she was fine. His Mom however... he couldn't figure her out at all. 

Okay, maybe that was a lie, maybe just didn't want to figure her out. She never said anything when he said he was going over to Will's or when Will came over but her demeanor changed. He didn't want to think about what that meant. 

He didn't know if she suspected something or she was just upset he wasn't home a lot lately, or when he was he was in the basement or his room. It was hard to tell with her, and it wasn't like he was gonna just ask, that would open a whole can of worms he wasn't ready to deal with. So, they were in this limbo sort of state. And he didn't think today would be any different. 

"Going over to Will's again?" His Mom asked him as he grabbed breakfast. 

He shook his head, trying not to drop his toast out of his mouth. He found a plate, "No, he and Jane are having a siblings day. Max says she wants to teach me to skate, I can't see that ending well but..." He trailed off having nothing else to add. 

"Why can't you just stay home today?" 

He furrowed his eyebrows, "A couple of months ago you were practically begging me to leave the house and now you want me to stay in?" Parents, Mike found, did not make sense sometimes. 

"We never see you anymore, Micheal." What? They saw him all the time! Like at mealtimes or... Yeah, okay, maybe he had been avoiding his Parents. "I just want to spend some time with you, is that so bad?" Bad? Well, depending on how it went... He did say he would be open though. 

"Okay, I can get mortally injured some other day." His Mom gave him a look. "Sorry." The room fell silent. "Did you have something planned or...?" He asked after a few minutes, putting his plate in the sink. She eyed it. 

"Do you want something else to eat?" And that was how he found himself having pancakes even though it was Sunday and not Saturday and listening to his Mom telling him what she had been up to. It wasn't that bad so far, after Max offering her condolences and promising they could still hang out if it went south he felt like he could face whatever happened. And if this was what it would be like all day he would be perfectly fine. 

So of course something had to ruin that. 

"Tell that Byers' kid that if he's gonna be hanging around here not to leave his art crap everywhere." His dad told Mike as he entered the kitchen. Mike clenched his fists and ground his teeth. 

"I think that's Holly's stuff actually, dad." 

His Mom grabbed his hand, "Don't call it that, Ted, what if she had heard you? Or Will? Honestly, if you have such a problem with it talk to her yourself." His dad just sighed and left the kitchen. Useless, absolutely useless. "I don't know what his issue is lately." She said, shaking her head. Mike didn't have the heart to tell her he's always had an issue. "How is Will, anyways? He's over so much but I feel like I never get to talk to him." She chuckled good-heartedly but Mike felt himself freeze up. The one subject he didn't want to come up. 

It was nothing on Will, nothing at all, but once Mike started talking about him he couldn't stop. And while that was nothing new she would know something was up for sure. "Yeah, he's fine. Excited to be back home." 

"I'll bet. But that's all, you've been spending all your time with him and that's all you got?" Why did that feel like an attack? He was sure it wasn't, but it still put him on edge. God. This sucked. He shouldn't have to be on edge around his Parents, he shouldn't have to be holding his tongue or watching what he said. He shouldn't have to be worried about getting kicked out. 

He abruptly got out of his seat, "I can't do this." His Mom followed him, 

"Do what? We were just having a nice discussion. I was just asking about one of your friends." Friends. Will meant so much more to him than that. But he couldn't tell her that. He couldn't be here right now. "Micheal, Micheal! Where are you going?" 

"Out." 

He went out the backdoor and headed for his bike but her voice stopped him, "Why do you keep doing this? What are you keeping from me?" 

He whirled around at her, "Nothing! Why do you keep trying to pry in my life? Why can't you just leave me alone?!" She recoiled and held a hand to her chest. He sagged. "I can't." He pleaded, because he really couldn't. Not her. Anybody but her. 

But to his surprise she walked closer to him and put her hands on his arms, "Micheal, there isn't anything you can't tell me. You are my son, I will always love you no matter what." Sure, she said that now, but as soon as she found out the truth... That was as good as over. He'd be lucky if she looked at him. "Okay, fine, you don't have to tell me but you can at least come back inside and we can continue our day?" 

"No. I'm sorry, and I really appreciate that you're trying, but I can't keep pretending like I do every time we talk. It's killing me." 

"It's killing me too." He looked at her surprised. "What? You think I didn't notice? I'm your Mother, of course I noticed. Micheal, I see that something's wrong with you, I've seen it for months, and it's killing me that I can't help you with it. And I know it has something to do with Will, I know that you've been better since he's been back, but something's still wrong." What? Nothing was wrong, he had accepted himself, he had accepted his feelings for Will, he was even thinking about telling Will about them. What could be wrong? 

Well, besides the obvious, but the way she was talking... it was like she was seeing something he wasn't. What was that thing Lucas said? 'That's not a nice way to treat yourself', maybe there was more to that than he thought. Maybe there was more to this than he thought. 

"I don't know." He admitted. "I don't know what's wrong." 

She pulled him closer to her, "It's like you have this weight on you, this pressure, that won't go away no matter what I or you or anyone does. You walk around like everyone's against you, like the world has forgotten about you. But they're not, it hasn't. You matter, Micheal, you matter so much." That was it. That was the thing. 

He sunk into her arms and started crying. How long had he been waiting for someone to say those words? People wanted him around, he knew that, of course he knew that, and everyone's reactions to him being gay had only solidified it, but when was the last time he had believed that he mattered? ...Was there a last time? 

He mattered. He mattered, he mattered, he mattered. And his Mom was the one who reminded him. "Mom, I'm gay." 

Her only response was to hold him tighter. 

---

Mike rode the high of his Mom's acceptance for the rest of the day. For the first time in a while he truly felt okay, and when he left for Will's house the next day all she did was give him a knowing smile. Which, okay, how did she figure it out? He had done less around her than Dustin and he still didn't know how Dustin knew. It was like all (most) people needed to know was that he was gay and they put the pieces together. Was he missing something? He had to be, there was no way he was that obvious. 

Then again... 

He had said and did some incriminating stuff in the past, but come on, he couldn't help it! He couldn't not do and say that stuff about Will. It wasn't like he still wasn't being careful about it, everything could totally be taken as really strong friendship stuff, he was just surrounded by some pretty perceptive people. Not his fault at all. ...It might've been a little his fault. But he had always done that stuff, why were they only catching on now? Well, he couldn't ask that question actually, considering he hadn't caught on until a few months ago. Heteronormativity (Nancy taught him that word) was a hell of a drug. 

"I told my Mom." He said as soon as he saw Will. 

Will's eyes widened, "Really? How did it go?" 

"Good, really good. Will, I- I haven't felt like this in a while. I never thought, I never even considered... And you know what she said to me before I told her? That I mattered. I don't think I've ever felt like that before. And I know it doesn't fix everything with me, that I still have some stuff I need to work through- stuff I didn't even know about until yesterday, but right now I feel like I can." For the first time in his life he felt like he could do something. Like he didn't have to push everything down, like he didn't have to tell himself no. 

It was funny how three words could change your life. There were another three words he hoped would also change his life for the better. But that wasn't for right now, not this soon. He had some stuff to work through first. 

He was cut out of his thoughts by two arms wrapping around him, "I'm really happy for you, Mike." 

"Thanks." He said softly, unable to say anything more. 

"I knew something was going on, something more than dealing with being gay, I just didn't want to force you to talk about it. But I'm glad you did." Will knew something was going on too? That, wasn't much of a surprise really. "You're my best friend, Mike, I hope you know how much you matter to me." He did, he really did, you weren't best friends with someone for 10 years without meaning a lot to them. So, in that case, of course Mike mattered. He just... was new to thinking he did. He hadn't been able to connect those dots before but he would now. He mattered to people so he mattered in general, such a simple thought and he couldn't grasp it before yesterday. 

But he couldn't dwell on that. "Of course I do. You matter a lot to me too, Byers." And the smile Will gave him in response... it was the most amazing sight he'd ever seen. "What'd you and El do yesterday?" 

And that was how they spent the rest of the afternoon, talking and listening to music in Will's room. At some point Mike noticed it was his mixtape that was playing to which all Will had to say was, "It's good, I haven't stopped listening to it really." Needless to say Mike didn't say anything for five minutes after that. But it was nice being with Will, it always was, and when Hopper came to get them for dinner he didn't even think of being snarky. 

Dinner with the Hoppers-Byers' was always nicer than dinner at his own house. It was louder for one thing and it felt more warm, like they were actually a family. He had to give credit to his Mom, she did try, but his dad shut everything down with his sighs and eye rolls. There was a reason he and Nancy preferred to eat somewhere else. 

Right now Jonathan was telling them about the portfolio he was putting together for college applications, NYU, and Mike tried not think about how in a few months his sister would be out of the house. For the past few years he didn't think he'd really care too much, but they had gotten closer over the past few months and now he found he would miss her a lot more than he thought he would. But he could worry about that later. 

"I think I'd like to go somewhere in New York." Will said when his brother finished. Mike fumbled with his fork, 

"You're, uh, thinking about that stuff already?" He asked, trying to stay away from the fact that he had pointedly not done that. 

Will looked at him, "Well, yeah, kinda. Just general stuff, you know? I wanna have some idea when we get to senior year." 

"Right, right." Mike started pushing his food around his plate, suddenly no longer hungry. "Cool. New York sounds fun." He tested. Will lit up and he relaxed. 

"Yeah?" He asked hopefully. 

Mike smiled, "Yeah."  He could see it now, them attending college together. Mike taking writing classes and Will art, them sharing a dorm and working on projects side by side. Eating almost every meal at some local diner since they both seem to like those so much, sight-seeing on the weekends. Spending all of their free time together, like they were doing already. Words couldn't describe how much he wanted that. And now he could have it. "Yeah." 

"Well it'd be great to have you guys up there. Provided I get in, of course." Jonathan added on dejectedly. 

Mrs. Byers instantly shut that down though, "Of course you're getting in, Jonathan, they'd be stupid not to accept you." Everyone else said similar things and he smiled at them. "El, sweetie, have you been thinking about stuff like that?" And with that El became the center of the conversation. 

"It'd be cool to get into NYU with Jonathan." Will whispered to him. "But I think I'd go anywhere in the state. It's better than here for people like us." 

Mike turned to him, "Really?" He whispered back. He hadn't thought about stuff like that, just that he wanted to get out of Indiana as soon as possible. 

Will nodded, "Not perfect but you can like, hold hands with someone." He blushed. "If you want to." Oh. Did Will... like someone? 

"Do you want to?" He asked teasingly, hoping he was hiding his true feelings about that thought well enough. Mike had been so convinced Will would never like him, and then to give himself more credit than that, he never considered Will might like someone else. He was regretting that now. 

It was Will's turn to push around his food, "Eventually. Once I find somebody." Mike, Mike could be somebody! He... was somebody, they held hands all the time recently. And he knew they were talking in a romantic sense but that had to mean something, didn't it? 

"We hold hands." He hinted. 

"Yeah, as friends." Will brushed off. Ow. Yeah, they held hands as friends but he didn't see Will holding Max's, or Lucas', or Dustin's hand. "And that's nice, but it's not the same. I wanna," He paused. Mike watched him carefully. "I wanna find someone that likes me like that. Who wants to kiss me and go out on dates." Oh, if he only knew. 

But this wasn't the time for Mike to say something. No matter how much it killed him not to. "You will. You will." He promised, because even if he didn't like Mike back Mike was sure he would catch plenty of other guys' eyes. Will was too amazing not to. 

Will didn't say anything for the rest of the meal but Mike kept shooting glances at him, certain that was something was going on. He felt like he had somehow messed up saying that, that it wasn't what Will wanted to hear. But then, what did he want to hear? Surely he didn't want Mike to disagree with him. 

Something was up. As soon as dinner was over Will had fled to his room, even though Mike was supposed to spend the night. He messed up, he messed something up, and clearly Hopper had the same idea because he wasted no time in cornering him and asking what he did. 

"I don't know! We were just talking and he went quiet." He shot a longing look towards Will's room, he wanted to go in there and talk to him, but somehow he didn't think he'd be welcome. "I said something to upset him but I don't know what." 

Hopper sighed, "You have to stop doing this, first El and then him-" 

"And then him what?! I'm not treating as badly as I did El." He couldn't, not again. It was bad enough he did it to her. But Will... god he'd never forgive himself for treating Will like that. "I'm not messing things up with him again! I know you have like this image of me and I know I was a horrible boyfriend to El but I love him!" Shit. But, he couldn't bring himself to regret it. "I'm in love with him, Hopper, I'm not fucking around anymore." 

Hopper glared at him, "Language." Then softened up. "You're really serious about this, huh? Look, you know I don't think you're a bad kid, right?" He did not know that actually. "I mean, Jesus, Wheeler, I saw how you were when he got possessed, I know how much you care about him. And I don't know what you've been going through, but relationships and romance are complicated enough when you're straight. If you've got your shit figured out good for you, if you don't then figure it out before you talk to him. For both of your sakes." That was, a lot better than what he thought it would be actually. 

But he figured the most important thing out a long time ago. "It's Will, it's always been Will." 

Hopper nodded his head. "Go get him then."

---

Mike knocked on Will's door and waited for a response. When he didn't get one he spoke up, "Will, it's me. Can I come in?" 

"Sure." 

"How come you took off like that?" He asked as he sat next to Will on his bed. 

Will shrugged, "I don't know, just not ready to think about the fact that Jonathan'll be gone soon." Okay well that was a lie. Since when did Will lie to him? 

"Are you sure? It seemed like something more than that." He pressed, not wanting to accuse Will of anything. If he was lying he had a good reason. Mike just didn't know why Will felt like he had to. 

"Mike..." What? What was he missing? He didn't fully understand what was going on but Will was upset, that was more than enough for him. He tried to grab Will's hand but he held it from him, making Mike startle slightly. They didn't do that.  "I can't talk about it right now, please don't push it." 

"Okay." He immediately said. "Whatever you need." Will flinched. "Soorry?" He uncertainly added on. "Should I not have said that?" 

Will shook his head, "It's not you." Then what was it? He was grasping at straws here, something that was unfamiliar when it came to Will. He felt stuck. Something was wrong with Will and he couldn't fix it. He hated that feeling. But if he didn't want to talk about it Mike wouldn't force him. No matter how much it was killing him to see him like this. "I'm sorry, I know I'm acting weird." 

"It's fine." Mike slightly smiled at him, "It's not like I never act weird. We can do something else, do you wanna just listen to music?" Will smiled back and got up to turn the radio on. Mike watched him, glad he could at least give Will a distraction. He was already looking happier, but music tended to do that to him. It was one of the many reasons he loved him. 

Right. That. He wanted to tell Will, and maybe this wasn't the right time but he was starting to realize there never was one. Maybe the only thing that mattered was that he was ready. But could he put that on Will, when he was clearly going through something? He wouldn't be selfish, not with Will. 

"Mike?" He jumped. "Sorry. Are you okay? You seem quiet." But Will was asking now, and that was an opening... Still, it'd be wrong to give Will more to deal with, even if he did like Mike back. He didn't seem like he was in a space to talk about that kind of stuff. "If you have something you want to talk about I can listen, I don't mind." Dammit. 

Will Byers was too good for this world. 

"It involves you." He broached. "So if you don't want to-"

"Involves me how?" Will cut him off. Mike gulped, 

"Like I have something I need to tell you." He nodded. "Okay, guess we're doing this. I want to! I just, you were going through something not ten minutes ago so I don't want to put anything heavy on you but if you want to hear-"

"Mike." Will grabbed his hand. "Please tell me. Whatever it is I want to know." 

Mike squeezed his hand. He could do this. He was doing this. "I never told you how I realized I was gay. After you left for Benton I was miserable and it slowly dawned on me that you were the one I missed the most, more than my girlfriend. And at first I thought, 'That makes sense, I've known Will my whole life, of course I miss him more.', but there was more to it than that. I had feelings for you, feelings I was supposed to have for her." Will froze which made Mike falter, but he pressed on. He couldn't back out now. "I'm in love with you, Will Byers."  

Will suddenly teared up and Mike frowned with concern, "The reason I got quiet at dinner was because when you said that I thought it meant you didn't like me. I've been in love with you for years, Mike." Years, oh, that was. Wow. Years. 

"Cool." He choked out, then promptly put his head in his hands. Will giggled slightly which turned into laughter which made Mike start laughing and soon they were collapsed on Will's bed in hysterics. 

Will was in love with him, he couldn't believe how lucky he was. He couldn't believe his response to it. 

They eventually calmed down and laid side by side, catching their breaths. Mike looked at Will, "Let's start our own party, you and me."

"Yes."