Work Text:
Edward assures his brother that he is going to be just fine. What’s a couple days milling around by himself? After all he’ll be kept busy with all the paperwork Mustang will no doubt force upon him. He promises Alphonse that he’ll be fine if the younger leaves for a couple days.
Which he was. Telling his younger brother that he worried too much, it was just a bit of paper work, he was taking it easy, there was nothing to worry about.
When in reality Ed’s spent the past three days holed up in the office doing nothing but paper work, cramming in all-nighters full of research and writing.
Without his younger brother there to force him to take a break from studying and work it's not long before Ed completely neglects his mental and physical health. Not that Al is any better than him when it comes to working, considering that without his body he can’t feel the effects of sleep deprivation. He often only feeds into Ed’s own bad habits, but still, he has an uncanny sixth sense to pick up on when Ed was reaching a final breaking point and needed to stop before he collapsed.
Despite it being his own body Ed seems to be missing this vital ability.
When the letters begin to swim across the pages in front of him, he sets his head down on the desk and closes his eyes for a moment. He’s not going to take much more than a minute’s rest at most. He can’t afford too. Not when it was his own fault that his little brother couldn’t rest, searching endlessly for a solution to a problem that he caused.
Two more days. He only needed to last until Monday. Then Al would be back from his trip and everything could go back to normal.
He’s only supposed to be resting for a moment.
He ends up crashing at his desk late without meaning too.
It’s a dreamless sleep, the background noise of other’s milling around chasing away any dreams, or perhaps he’s just too exhausted. Either way it doesn’t last long before he’s being shaken awake, neck stiff and uncomfortable from the position he was laying in. His heart was slamming in his chest and it took Edward far too long to realize just where he was and what had woken him.
This wasn’t his house. This wasn’t anyone’s house. There was no body crumpled to the ground. Not his mother, not a little girl, not an animal, no one here that he had failed to save. The thought didn’t comfort him as he realized that while his observations were true, it also meant that his brother wasn’t there with him.
He wanted to go home.
Of course, it had to be Mustang finding him and waking him up. “Fullmetal? Are you alright kid?”
He- he didn’t feel alright. Groggy from a lack of sleep and a rude awakening.
There was a warm hand on his shoulder, it took him awhile to realize that he was still being spoken too. Even then he could only nod dumbly, words clogging up in his throat.
“You should go home kid. You’ve done enough for today.”
But he didn’t want to go home. He had more work that he could be doing, Mustang of all people should have realized that. He was horribly behind in reports, this was his chance to catch up with some of them. Besides, and maybe he didn’t want to admit this, but the apartment was cold and lonely with Al away. His brother wouldn’t be home for a couple days now. Going home would mean he’d have to reflect on his own situational loneliness. At least he could temporarily feign ignorance while surrounded by the rest of the team. Ed put up a fuss, he doesn't want to go home.
He tried to rub the sleep from his eyes, whining softly when his skin was met with the cold metal of his arm. Right… automail. He hated his prosthetics when he felt like this. Heavy and cold. A constant reminder of his failures. He wanted them off!
“Got work to do.” He mumbled, realizes Mustang was probably going to get mad at him if he didn’t give some kind of verbal response soon.
“No, you don’t. Go home kid. Get some rest, you look like you need it.”
Edward whined again, high pitched and childish, slumping down against his desk. Why wouldn’t Mustang just leave him alone? He could rest here for a moment and carry on if he was just left alone.
“Fullmetal. I’m warning you.”
“You’re not my dad.” He mutters, not sure why he says the statement to begin with. But his mind is fuzzy and his thoughts are sticky and small and it’s the first thought that comes into his head. He could be honestly. Ed wouldn’t be lying if he said that Roy didn’t care about him and his brother. More so than any adult in his life had for a long time.
“No, I’m not, but as your commanding officer…” Ed closed his eyes. He’s had practice tuning Roy out, besides, the man made for good white noise in the background. “-are you even listening to me?”
He hummed noncommittedly.
He heard Roy walk away with a small curse under the man’s breath. Success. He’d been left alone. Good.
Edward knew he should probably get back to doing work now that his distraction was gone even if he really didn’t want to…
Wait no Roy was coming back, this time with Riza trailing behind him.
“Leaving for the night sir?”
“Yes.” He was picking up Ed’s belongings. He watched with a blank stare, about to speak up to ask just what the heck Mustang thought he was doing when he gets interrupted. “Come pipsqueak.”
“Huh?” He says dumbly.
“I can’t leave you here, and I don’t trust you enough to not work the night away.”
Arms wrapped around him and before his sleep deprived brain could figure out what was going on he was being lifted into the air.
Or well… an attempt was being made.
"Jeez you're heavy kid." Roy grunted, trying, and failing to pick the younger up along with Ed’s few belongings. He had severely underestimated how heavy his automail would weigh.
"Is fine. Can walk." Ed wiggled his legs as if to demonstrate.
"I know you can, it’s not going to change anything." Roy was going to carry the kid; it just was going to take him a second to properly lift him. And while Roy doubted, he could hold Ed for long he was going to do everything in his power in order to carry the boy to his car.
While Roy admired the kid’s work ethic, he wouldn’t put it past him to slip away and go back to working, an option that was no longer available for the clearly overworked teen.
He heard Riza sigh, no doubt watching him struggle. “Give him here.”
She lifted Edward up in one smooth motion, settling the boy on her hip like a mom would her child. It didn’t help the fuzzy feeling that was growing in Ed’s mind clinging to her in such a way. Turning expectantly toward Roy she asked, “You’re car sir?”
“Uh, yes.”
~~~
Roy couldn’t tell whether it was a lack of sleep, if Fullmetal was just deciding to rub it in that Riza was his favorite, or something else, but the kid seemed different. More childish as he was bounced in Riza’s arms, waiting for the car door to unlock.
He was rambling on about something, his lieutenant was nodding as though she could understand what was being said to her. Roy sure as hell couldn’t, the teen’s voice quick paced and words slightly slurred.
“Alright Ed.”
“Where going?”
“Back to my place.” It was the only logical option. Taking Ed back to the teens own apartment would only lead to him working again the moment that Roy left. He didn’t think that Edward would mind sleeping on the couch for the night, what with his younger brother being gone.
“Kay.”
He was expecting more of a fight. Jeez, maybe he had been over working the kid.
“Come on, Get in.”
“Nuh uh.” He clung tightly to Riza.
Roy’s pretty sure he jinxed himself. “What do you mean ‘nu-uh?’”
“Don’t wanna.” He stuck his tongue out.
“Fullmetal-”
“Would you like me to come too Ed?”
His lieutenant really was a saint. Ed nodded, hiding his face into her shoulder shyly. Roy sighed and held open the back door for the two of them to get in.
“I can drop you off before we get there.” Roy says, feeling rather guilty for dragging Riza into this situation.
“You don’t have to. Poor kid has the world on his shoulders. I don’t mind taking care of him for a while.” And it really didn’t seem like she did. Edward was tucked up against her, head leaning on her shoulder.
Roy nodded.
“Why?” Ed asked suddenly, breaking the silence that had fallen over the passengers in the car.
“Why what?”
“Why you doing this?”
“Because if I didn’t, you’d work yourself to the ground kid.” Roy comments.
"No. Cause," he waved his hand around frustrated as the right words weren’t coming to his head. Thinking that Mustang should understand what he meant without him needing to waste precious energy explaining it all. "Gotta give something in exchange.” He was met by silence. Ed huffed. He could forgive Riza for the confused look she was giving him, but she wasn’t an alchemist. Mustang on the other hand was. “No one does nothin' nice for free. Gotta do somethin’ first. Is why I want Al."
He didn’t deserve the kindness. Afterall, he was a monster. Greedy for attention. A user of those around him. He didn’t deserve the kindness or the pity, didn’t deserve a break or time to himself when he was the one who caused his problems in the first place.
"Kid. Do you really think that I'd force you to do something for me in order for me to be worried about and take care of you?”
Ed didn’t answer. Instead, he muttered a small, “I’ll wait for Al.” He didn’t bother to speak up clearly. If the colonel couldn’t understand him that was his own issue.
“Jus drop me off home. Al ‘ll be back soon, will be fine.” It would be better if he was left alone. Head cotton stuffed and floaty. No one should have to deal with him like this, least of all Hawkeye and Mustang.
His brother always took care of him when he felt small. Al was always there when he was mentally worn out and was inevitable due to crash into a younger headspace. He didn’t even mean to be like this, but couldn’t seem to pull himself out of it either when it got bad.
Roy sighed, “That’s not an option I’m afraid. I don’t mind stepping in and helping, especially if it means you don’t have to put so much pressure on your brother.”
And that statement stung. He did rely too much on his younger brother, didn’t he? He couldn’t help it, not really. Al never said anything when he got like this, just took it all in stride. Ed didn’t have to question his little brother’s motivations and he really took that for granted. It was a struggle not too, he was all he had left in this world, the only solid thing Ed could cling to when the world seemed too big and there was no safety.
He sniffled; head too full up with cotton to realize that he was making a fool of himself. He should have felt embarrassed. Instead, all he felt was guilt and grief.
“Don’t mean too!” He wailed.
“Hey don’t cry. I just meant that he deserves a break as well. I- damn kid.”
“Well, you sure are good with children.” Hawkeye stated dryly, watching the two for a while without stepping in.
Roy glared at her through the rearview mirror. “Not helping.”
“I wan’ bubba! ” Ed wailed.
“I know kiddo.” She wiped at his tears with her thumb. “I know, but he’s not here right now and it’s so unfair on you huh?”
“Uh huh. Lef’ me for dumb mission. An da house is all cold and scary an I don’ mean to be small, and I miss him!” He cried.
Riza pulled the teen closer. “I know. Does he usually look after you like this sweetheart?”
“Mhm.” He supposed it made sense that she would understand, considering Riza was going along with how he was acting with little questions
“I see.”
Roy didn’t understand what conclusion either came too, and wasn’t sure if it was his place to ask.
“Do you know about age regression sir?” Riza asked once Ed had calmed down significantly. Although the question seemed to make him agitated once again.
Roy paused at the question. Was this about the way he was acting? Or maybe it had nothing to do with Fullmetal. He was going to play it on the safe side just in case. “Like human transmutation regression or…”
Roy could practically feel the stare that Riza leveled him. A look that clearly expressed that she thought he was stupid. Which yeah made sense, nothing look physically different with Ed.
“Psychological regression.”
He had to think about that one for a moment. He can almost recall information. Some lecture or reading he’d found with a lot of useless information that he hadn’t bothered to study. Thinking back on Ed, maybe he should have paid more attention.
“Mental regression often takes place after the formation of trauma.”
Riza nodded, looking a bit exasperated. Ed whined and she hushed him gently.
It suddenly hit Roy full force what his lieutenant was getting at. So maybe it was obvious, he blamed it on a long work day. He hadn’t wanted to jump to any conclusions about the teen’s behavior. He had seen firsthand how overworked the boy had been with his brother gone and was going to chalk up any abnormalities to a lack of sleep. But now that Riza pointed out he was acting childlike nothing else explained the change.
“Makes sense.” He muttered to himself, mulling over his own thoughts. He could handle watching over a regressed Fullmetal. Sure. Not a problem. Not like he didn’t have any experience with biological children.
“So you’re regressed, are you kiddo?” He just had to check. Riza was usually never wrong with these sorts of things, her intuition second to none, yet this was Fullmetal, the kid who never failed to surprise him with his shenanigans.
He looked in the review mirror in time to see Ed nod shyly. The realization that Riza and Roy knew he was small hitting him with full force. He’s not sure what he expected considering he wasn’t doing a very good job at keeping his secret.
“Can I get an age check?”
Ed held up three fingers.
“Thanks bud.”
He didn’t get a verbal response, although Roy did notice that something seemed to settle within Ed, as if he’d been trying to fight against being little and finally gave into it.
The rest of the ride back was nothing special. Ed was still sniffling from time to time, Riza doing her best to soothe the teen.
By the time they reached his place Roy was ready to throw in the towel and call it a day.
Riza carries Ed into the house, settling him down on the couch with little fuss.
A least for the first moment because as soon as Fullmetal seemed to settle he clug to Riza and started to complain about being hungry.
It’s then that Roy realizes his chances of doing nothing but crashing into bed was very unlikely.
“You can get him changed into something more comfortable, then we can start something for dinner?” Riza asks.
“Dinner right…” He knows there are leftovers in the fridge. Chili from a couple nights before that would be easy enough to heat. She’s already handing Ed over to him, heading towards the kitchen without waiting for a proper response.
“Alright Ed, let’s find something that will fit you.”
~~~
The two come back into the room. Ed’s dressed in a pair of shorts and an oversized sweater of Roy’s. It practically engulfs the regressor, covering his hands and creating sweater paws that the kid happily flaps around. Roy himself changed into sweatpants and a grey buttoned shirt.
“You’re going to hit me in the face if you keep doing that.” Roy scowls.
“Bah!”
He gets smacked in the face with a sleeve, sending the regressor into a fit of giggles upon impact. “You’re a gremlin. But you know that already, don’t you?”
Edward nods.
“Bathrooms free if you want to freshen up a bit.” Roy informs as he and Ed go and sit in the living room.
The regressor begins chewing on his metal fingers. Roy cringes. That can’t be good for his teeth.
Roy took the kid’s hand and pulled it out of his mouth with a slight tug. Fullmetal scowled at him.
“I know, I’m the bad guy.”
The regressor nodded as seriously as any two year old could, and babbled something that Mustang tried to interpret. His attempt was all in vain and as Edward was looking at him as if waiting for a response, he just went with the first thing that popped into his head.
“Uh huh, well you make a very good argument there.” More babbles. Mustang hummed as if in thought. "Yeah no, I still won't allow you to chew on your hand."
"Bah!" Ed was now pouting.
“How about I raise you one and we come to a compromise?” He pulled out a small rubber bracelet from his pocket, something he had transmuted not too long ago when Ed was getting dressed, having the funny feeling that he was going to need it. Roy held it out in front of the boy. “I give you this and you don’t stick your hands in your mouth for a while. Deal?”
Fullmetal made grabby hands towards the bracelet, giggling once it was handed over. Mustang was at a loss of words. Because really, his untimely demise wasn’t going to be on a battle field, or on some dangerous mission, no, it was going to be his heart failing from the overload of fondness that came from Fullmetal giggling.
“Look at you, actually getting along. I’m impressed.” Riza comments.
Roy looks up about to retort back to her only to be stopped at the sight of Riza wearing one of his sweatshirts. Roy can barely comment, flustered at how natural she appeared. Sure, maybe he should have expected this, considering she didn’t get the chance to stop at her own place and he could hardly expect her to stay in uniform all evening. Still, how domestic the whole situation was and yet she didn’t seem fazed in the slightest. They looked like a family that’s just gotten off from work and home from school.
He remembers himself quickly enough to jab back at the other’s remark. “That sounded like sarcasm.”
She didn’t give him an answer. “Food’s going to get cold.”
“Up! Up!” Ed announced, making grabby hands the best he could while still holding onto the teether Roy made.
Attempt number two of picking up the baby. This time Roy managed, getting both of them to sit at the table with little struggling on his end, acutely aware of Riza watching him with what he could only assume was a fond grin.
Who knew trying to feed a mentally 2-year-old a couple mouthfuls of chili would be nearly impossible?
Riza had clearly decided that her job was simply reheating the food and setting the table, and left Roy to fail all by himself.
“You need to eat something.” He tried, nudging the bowl towards Edward in a subtly attempt to get him to start eating.
“Nuh uh.”
Roy was quickly regretting making the chew bracelet as now Ed refused to take it out of his mouth.
“Just one bite?”
“Nu.” He said around the teether.
“Fullmetal-”
“Roy.” Riza shot him a look.
Roy sighed. Edward giggled. Of course, he found this funny.
He picked up the spoon holding it up to the regressor’s mouth. “Say ahh.” Against his better judgment it seemed that Ed was more than willing to eat when he wasn’t the one having to hold the spoon.
“You just want to see me suffer, don’t you?”
The regressor only giggled again.
~~~
They finished dinner and Riza went to put the dishes in the sink. Ed went back to chewing on his teether.
Roy got up, stretching. “Alright time to get ready for bed kiddo.”
“Uh-uh.” Ed shook his head no, immediately starting to pout.
“Fullmetal, I’m exhausted. It’s bed time.”
The regressor scrunched up his nose, clearly unimpressed at Roy’s attempt at reasoning.
“You don’t get a say in the matter, let’s go.”
He practically dragged Ed into the bathroom, clearly the teen had no remorse for making Roy suffer no matter what headspace. Grabbing a clean wash cloth and rinsing it Roy started to clean the boy’s face.
“Ick- no! Staaaap!” Ed squirmed, face scrunching up as he tried to avoid the damp cloth being wiped across his face.
“It’s not that bad. You can’t go to bed with soup on your face.”
Roy went to rinse out the cloth one more time, a bad decision on his end as the regressor took one look at the running water and decided to enact revenge. Dunking his hand into the stream and splashing it at his caregiver.
“Dah!”
“Hey! You little gremlin.”
It was childish, he shouldn’t be allowing such behavior, but Roy couldn’t help himself from flicking water back at the regressed teen.
Ed gasped at him, clearly appalled.
“Two can play at that game.” Roy smirked.
Terrible idea.
Riza stuck her head in the room minutes later. “What’s going on in here?”
There was water everywhere. All over the counter, some on the floor, and spewed across the bathroom mirror. Somehow Roy got soak more in the process than Ed did even though he was the one who was supposed to be getting cleaned up. Ed of course lit up seeing Riza, making grabby hands as a silent petition to be picked up and held.
“An attempt at getting the grime off of his face.” Roy said, flicking water off of his hands.
“I can see that.” A hint of a smile could be heard beneath her words.
“Come on you two, enough goofing off.”
~~~
The spare bedroom was nothing special, it was just that, a spare. A single bed pushed to the corner, a desk with a small wooden chair, a fuzzy rug and a standing lamp.
Riza sat on the edge of the bed with Ed in her lap. She hummed as she brushed out his hair with her fingers, redoing the braid in his hair. Gone was the burst of energy he had during their little water fight. Ed chewed softly on his teether; eyes heavy. Roy thought he looked like he was going to topple over at any given moment.
Riza pressed a kiss to his forehead once she was finished with his hair. “Time for bed now baby.”
“Nuuu.” He didn’t really have the energy to argue, just enough to make his complaints known as he slumped against his caregiver’s shoulder.
“I know.” Riza scooped him up, pulling back the covers to place him underneath them.
“Mm, don’t go.” Ed whined, reaching blindly out for Riza. “’onely.”
“Want me to sit with him?” Roy asked.
Riza shook her head, sitting down at the edge of the bed. “I’ve got it. You can get some rest.”
Like he was going to do that. Roy grabs the desk chair from the corner of the room, moving it besides the bed.
Edward was out within minutes. Days of going without any sleep catching up with him all at once.
“I’ll take the couch tonight; you can sleep in my bed.”
Riza hums in agreement, reaching out to stroke the teen’s hair one last time before standing.
“Goodnight Roy.” She says at the door.
Roy dips his head in a nod. “Goodnight.”
It’s strange how peaceful the night felt. How normal the whole situation was. Having dinner as a family, sitting beside the boy’s bed until he fell asleep, having Riza spend the night. Roy doubts this will be the only time something like this happens. Not when the boy so clearly needs a chance to take a break and let someone else handle his safety. The chance to be a kid again.
Roy finds that he doesn’t hate the idea of taking care of his kid again.
It felt safe.
It felt like home.