Archive of Our Own

The first time it happens, it is kinda excusable, because it happens during a game. A Clubs Game, which are the least terrifying games in Tatta's opinion. Or they would be, if he hadn't been put together with a group of incredibly uncooperative Militants from the Beach. He'd honestly prefer total strangers at this point. They normally aren't as hostile towards him.

Games stress him out as a general fact, but being glowered at by four different, heavily armed guys is especially stress inducing to him. Why hadn't he chosen another game?

They have been through what he would call several different cooperation exercises, and at this point, Tatta believes that some games are purely for the amusement of the Game Masters. There is no other reason for how laughably easy those exercises have been, even for a lower numbered game. They were an annoyance, a nuisance, nothing more, something to rile up the people who joined the games because they were out for blood but had to do trust falls and build human pyramids instead.

And now this:

Player 5 has to be kissed by one of the other players. The kiss must last for at least fifteen seconds. It must also contain the use of tongue.

Tatta is Player 5.

And it isn't like he looks forward to being kissed by a random guy in a mostly dark factory building, surrounded by the smell of copper and illuminated by the piercing light of several lamps that are placed around them in a circle. Overall not his preferred location to be in. Ever, really, but especially now.

But he doesn't particularly want to die either, so he braces himself for fifteen incredibly uncomfortable seconds of having a wet tongue in his mouth, because honestly, he's been through a lot worse since arriving in the Borderlands, and compared to for example that game with the rising water level and the lingering fear of dying by electrocution, this one feels like a walk in the park so far.

But apparently, he is the only one thinking like that.

Niragi - who had for some reason been assigned to the same game Tatta had - looks bored as hell. He had already done three of the four previous exercises, all while swearing up a storm, so Tatta doesn't expect anything more from him right now.

The other guys stare at Tatta with varying degrees of discomfort or disgust on their faces. None of them try to hide their displeasure at the task, and none of them seem to want to even lift a single finger.

The timer ticks down, second after uncomfortable second, and nothing happens.

Finally, one of them opens his mouth. "Not happening. I'm not a fag", he says.

Tatta really wants to roll his eyes but refrains from doing so. The rules of the game didn't ban violence among the players, and he really doesn't want to make an acquaintance with one of the guy's knives or the blunt butt of a rifle.

More seconds tick away.

Tatta thinks he should maybe say something but doesn't actually believe it would change anything. If the threat of imminent death doesn't make them get over their blatant homophobia, nothing will.

He should probably feel a lot more scared than he is. Sure, his legs are shaking, but they've been doing that since the start of the game. It's his default, sadly, nothing he can do about that. But this, dying a death this stupid, not because he isn't smart enough for a Diamonds Game, or strong enough for a Spades Game, or psycho enough for a Hearts Game, but because those guys are too insecure in their own sexuality to beat a Clubs Game, one that offers them the easiest win Tatta has ever seen, is just plain ridiculous and he refuses to feel anything but annoyance about it.

When the timer gets dangerously close to the 45 seconds mark, Tatta loses all of his already very small remaining hope in humanity. What an embarrassing way to die. He hears a murmured "Yeah, I'm not gay either", from another guy, who, for just a second, seemed like he could maybe overcome his own fear of male lips pressed against his, but no such luck.

Tatta closes his eyes, resigned. At least it will be a death by laser and not one of those exploding neck-things.

He waits with baited breath, until he hears a quiet swear to his left and opens his eyes again. "I can't believe you fucking idiots", Niragi snarls. "What is fucking wrong with you? And do I seriously have to do fucking everything around here?" With a look on his face that Tatta can only describe as downright pissed, Niragi steps forward and in front of Tatta, effectively blocking him from view.

Tatta doesn't know if he likes this turn of events. Honestly, just dying after the timer runs out seems mild compared to what he expects Niragi to do to him now. That face looks positively murderous, and Tatta feels the shaking in his legs intensify.

Oh, there's the fear he had been missing. He kinda wants the annoyance back, thank you very much.

But to his astonishment, Niragi's face softens. For a second, Tatta wonders if Niragi is even aware of it happening, but then he stops thinking all together when Niragi steps even closer, his long fingers cradling Tatta's face in a surprisingly gentle way. Dark eyes are searching his face, like Niragi is actually making sure Tatta is okay with this, like they're not all going to die if he isn't, and this feels so weird, because who'd have thought that tall, scary, trigger-happy Niragi could be so gentle?

Not Tatta, that's for sure.

But he doesn't say anything, only blinks up at the man in what he hopes will convey less of his confusion and more of a general consent to saving their fucking lives, and that seems to be enough. With twenty three seconds left on the timer, Niragi lowers his face and presses their lips together.

'I really should have taken off my hat', is the first thing Tatta muses, because the angle Niragi is holding himself in can't be too comfortable. Then, a warm tongue prods against his still closed lips, and Tatta let's out a surprised huff through his nose, because yeah, he'd totally forgotten about that part already, too preoccupied by how surprisingly not-bad the whole thing feels. Not at all how he expected it to be.

He hurries to open his own lips and meets Niragi's tongue halfway, because he isn't sure if that specific rule applies to the whole fifteen seconds or not, but he's not going to take his chances when Niragi already so graceously decided to save their sorry asses.

The piercing in Niragi's tongue is definitely there, but not overwhelmingly so. The metal ball is cool to the touch, and it's smaller than it looks, gliding against Tatta's tongue in a way that doesn't feel invading. Niragi's fingers are still cradling his cheeks and now the nails of his left hand start to scratch at his scalp behind his ear.

A soft noise accidentally escapes Tatta's lips. He hasn't been kissed like this in a really long time, okay? Sue him for being a little touch starved, a little needy.

When the voice indicates their success and proclaimes a Game Clear, he expects Niragi to immediately push away from him, but he doesn't. Instead, he looks at him with something in his eyes Tatta can't decipher, while his hands slowly glide from his neck over his shoulders and down his arms.

Then, a voice breaks them out of their own little bubble.

"Shit, Niragi. Are you fucking gay?"

Tatta can't help but sigh, because just like that, the softness disappears from Niragi's face and gets replaced by the same pissed off expression he had sported earlier. In a matter of seconds, Niragi looks like always and were it not for the card it had earned them, Tatta would seriously doubt that the kiss happened at all.

Niragi turns and watches the guy with a raised eyebrow.

"No, I'm not", he answers nonchalantly, "but I am not so insecure that I would rather die than kiss a perfectly harmless guy." His voice sounds light, unbothered even, but his eyes are hard and unwavering. "And now, I want you to give me the keys to the car, I want you to get out of here and to said car, and if I hear even a single word from any one of you, I will not hesitate to blow your fucking brains out. Are we understood?"

They all nod and scatter away, leaving them with the card and an awkward silence pressing down on them.

Tatta watches as Niragi takes the card and puts it into his breast pocket. It's a very low one, one the Beach has dozens and dozens of already, so not important in the grand scheme of things, but Hatter is very particular when it comes to his precious prizes.

"You don't breathe a word about this to anyone",  Niragi finally says as he shoulders his rifle and makes his way to the exit.

Tatta hums, his eyes on the back of Niragi's head. "Hadn't planned to", he finally says and sees Niragi nod.

Outside, the other guys wait around the single red car parked next to a broken down fence. One of them makes a beeline for the passenger door, but Niragi only klicks his tongue in annoyance. "He gets to ride shotgun", he says as he motions his head to Tatta. "None of you did anything helpful today, so you all go in the back."

Tatta sees one of them ready to protest Niragi's decision, but he gets dragged away by the other two, who glower at Tatta but ultimately clamber into the backseat without any further protest.

Tatta sighs again. It's going to be a long ride.

♡

The second time, Niragi doesn't have an excuse.

Really, there is no good reason for why he's pressing Tatta against the wall of a secluded hallway somewhere in the upper levels of the Beach, with his tongue in his mouth and his fingers buried in Tatta's conveniently cap-free hair.

Tatta was just minding his own business, running some errands for Ann and generally trying to be as low-key as possible, which is why he chose a route through a less populated area of the Beach. People tend to mostly stay at the lower levels, be it because of the safety of numbers or because they like to stay up to date on everything happening in the Borderlands and at the Beach.

Or, you know, it might also be because of the random Militants that seem to roam the upper floors with the clear intention of molesting unsuspecting victims. Or whatever it is Niragi was actually going for with his ambush. Tatta really isn't all that clear on that, seeing as of yet, Niragi hasn't been bothered to explain anything to him, the tight-lipped bastard he is.

Figuratively speaking because nothing about their current position is tightlipped in any way.

And it's not that Tatta minds kissing. He really doesn't, contrary to what people believe when they hear his stance on sex and physical attraction and everything he has never experienced and/or never wants to experience, thank you very much. Kissing is nice, makes him feel fuzzy and content and wanted.

But he also really wants to take a shower, curl up on his bed and eat that one chocolate donut he found after his last game and smuggled into the Beach and then under the floorboard of his personal room like the sneaky little shit he never dared to be when he was younger.

And Niragi, while certainly dark and also kind of good-smelling, very much isn't a donut. Or coated in chocolate.

But Tatta also holds a lot of respect for Niragi. Scratch that, he holds a lot of accumulated fear of him that even Niragi's treatment of him during that one game they played together couldn't completely eradicate. It's a lot less fear now, but still fear, and the fact that Niragi thinks it's sensible to walk around and randomly kiss people like it's his hobby really doesn't make it better in Tatta's eyes.

So he feels that saying something against Niragi kissing him, or giving any indication of not wanting this as much as Niragi obviously, and for whatever reason really seems to want, isn't necessarily a very good idea.

And well, as far as it comes to Tatta's own experience with kissing, Niragi seems to be quite good at it. Maybe not the womaniser, or... peopleiser... he wants to make everybody believe he is, but, and Tatta had figured as much during their last encounter, he's also no beginner, which makes this a lot more bearable. His fingers in his hair stay firmly where they are, they don't wander all over his body like Tatta had feared they would, and while the grip is strong, it also feels kind of grounding.

When Niragi finally decides he has enough, or maybe just needs to come up for air, he glares at him like it was Tatta who had ambushed him and not the other way around. He wets his lips with his tongue before biting his lip, with his eyes firmly on Tatta's mouth and Tatta wonders if there's something there he’s just never seen before, because he can't remember his own lips being something people generally pay a lot of attention to.

Niragi chooses that moment to turn back into the asshole he is well-known and respected for. "Don't fucking tell anybody about this", he threatens again, though his fingers that are still buried in Tatta's hair and his eyes that still linger on Tatta's face kind of undermine that threat a little.

Tatta nods anyway, because yeah, he has no intention of telling anyone about ... whatever this was. He wouldn't even know where to begin, honestly, and all in all, it seems too much of a bother to even try.

Niragi looks pacified. There's something soft in his gaze, Tatta thinks, something that reminds him of how Niragi looked just before that first kiss during the game, something that tells him he could have probably told Niragi off if he really wanted to. Maybe not for a chocolate donut, but he thinks Niragi would have cared if he was feeling truly uncomfortable.

Maybe. Probably.

Niragi corrects the rifle hanging from his shoulders, turns around and without another glance at Tatta, leaves the hallway through the next door. Tatta can hear him step down a flight of stairs, humming to himself. He shakes his head. What a weirdo.

As he makes his way down a different flight of stairs and then to his own room, he absentmindedly wonders if Niragi's kisses would feel different if the man had eaten a chocolate donut beforehand.

♡

The seventh one, not that he's counting, is probably his own fault.

But in his defense, he had been kind of running out of options. There isn't a whole lot you can do when you're stuck in a small, ransacked apartment while you're waiting for a thunderstorm to pass.

Niragi had already sent his two lackeys away to search the building for something edible. Tatta doesn't think they will find anything, but he also suspects that Niragi had been running out of patience with their constant bickering and just wanted them gone.

He kind of agrees with that sentiment, but it also means that he's now sitting with his back against the wall of a former child's bedroom while Niragi paces around in restless circles.

"You should take a break", Tatta finally says when it looks like Niragi is about to leave permanent impressions in the carpet with all his running. "Like, find a distraction or something. Look, there's a slot car track. I always wanted one of those when I was younger. My mom never had the money, being the single parent she was. It won't work, of course, with no power and stuff, but you could always play pretend, you know?"

Niragi doesn't stop his pacing, but he throws him an annoyed glance and Tatta raises his hands placatingly. "Ok, ok, no slot cars, I get it."

He's honestly a little amazed by how much he dares to say and do in Niragi's presence now. They've been paired up for a disproportionate number of games in the last few weeks, something Tatta wonders about sometimes but he doesn't complain too much because Niragi has proved to be very good at keeping Tatta alive so far.

Niragi also still surprise-kissed him from time to time in secret hallways or after one memorable Diamonds Game where they'd teamed up and the adrenaline and the rush of winning by a landslide apparently made both of them stupid enough to kiss rather deeply in a dim alleyway just outside the building where anyone could have seen them.

Anyway, being in close proximity to Niragi has kind of eradicated the last remnants of fear, which means that now, Tatta has no qualms rambling about everything and anything when Niragi's around. It might get him killed someday, but a lot of things might, so he's gonna take his chances.

"You should still find a distraction", he mumbles as he looks around the room. "We might be here a while and there's only so much time you can spend running around in circles before you get dizzy."

He kind of already knows what's going to happen when Niragi stops and cocks his head, listening to the far away sounds coming from the basement of the apartment building before crossing the room in a few long strides. He settles onto his knees right in front of Tatta, and yeah, maybe Tatta's already meeting him halfway because he's bored too, and the last time has been a while, and for a hot second, he had suspected that it had all just been a very curious fluke, but the hands against his neck and the teeth nibbling on his lips tell a different story.

They kiss leisurely this time, their movements slow and unhurried. Niragi ends up kneeling between Tatta's spread legs, and again Tatta's kind of astonished that Niragi doesn't take advantage of that and tries to turn the whole thing into something more.

Niragi smells a little like gunpowder today and a bit metallic, which is a smell that unfortunately clings to everybody in the Borderlands, but there's also something hidden underneath that, a scent that reminds Tatta of rainy days in autumn. His fingers are surprisingly soft as they card through Tatta's hair and there are small sighs escaping him, sounds that Tatta is sure Niragi would vehemently deny if he ever brought them up.

All in all, it's the best kiss they've shared so far and he's kind of disappointed when a loud thunder strike makes them break apart. Niragi stays close though, still kneeling between Tatta's legs and with his hands around the back of Tatta's neck. "Don't", he starts, his eyes on Tatta's lips again, and Tatta already knows where this is going.

"Don't tell anybody, yeah, yeah, I know, don't worry."

Niragi's still staring at his lips, but then he blinks and breaks away completely. He leaves the space between Tatta's legs but to Tatta's surprise doesn't go far, only relocating to Tatta's side and leaning against the wall as well. His eyes are closed, and Tatta takes a second to study him, his long eyelashes and his cheekbones and the piercings in his nose, eyebrow, and ears. He must seem quite attractive to other people, which kind of explains his ongoing popularity in spite of his seemingly abysmal personality. Tatta can't help noticing other things as well though, things like the dark bags under his eyes that scream sleepless nights, and the eyebrows that are only minimally furrowed, in a way that feigns being okay but might indicate an underlying headache.

It might also be just part of his resting bitch face. Who’s Tatta to know?

He turns and resumes his observation of the room before Niragi can open his eyes again and realizes that Tatta’s been staring. "Do you think they killed each other?", he finally asks when he doesn't find anything else to focus on. "You can't hear their constant bickering anymore."

Niragi snorts, his eyes still closed. "Or they've finally realized the tension between them isn't purely a rivalry and have started fucking instead."

Tatta raises an eyebrow. "That can't be sanitary."

Niragi opens his eyes and looks at him. "Nothing in this world is sanitary and people still fuck all the time."

Tatta shrugs. "Apparently. People seem to be stupid like that."

"What?" There's a confused expression on Niragi's face now. "Don't tell me you haven't. You've been here how long? Four months?"

"Five and a half", Tatta corrects him with a shrug. "And no, I haven't."

"How?", Niragi asks. "You're decently attractive and there's always so many people at the Beach. I don't believe that you haven't had the opportunity to fuck somebody since you arrived." He sounds so aghast, so disbelieving that Tatta almost laughs.

"I've had the opportunity", Tatta agrees. "I just never wanted to."

"You must be very picky then", Niragi says, before he thinks. "Or just really into cleanliness and sanitary sex."

"I'm not into sex, period."

"Really?" Niragi's eyebrows rise again. He doesn't seem judgmental at least, just surprised. "Like, never?"

"Nope. Tried it once even though I already hated the thought of it, it was a terrible experience, and I never want to do it again."

He waits for the inevitable ‘You only need the right person for it’, but it doesn't come. Instead, Niragi's still staring at him and to Tatta, it seems like he really wants to understand it, which is nice for a change. Not very many people try.

"Do you just ignore when you're attracted to other people then? Don't you want to be as close as possible?"

In that moment, Niragi looks just like a boy to him, someone who just really wants to understand the world around him. He hasn't been cussing, hasn't used any expletives really since the others left the room, and Tatta wonders if this is the real Niragi. The one behind the facade, the one that's more open-minded than he seems, or at least tries to be, the one who kisses Tatta but doesn't go any further than that, the one who doesn't make fun of Tatta's sexuality. It's that look on Niragi's face that makes Tatta decide to reveal himself fully to him, even though they barely know each other.

"I've never been sexually attracted to a single person in my entire life. I don't even fully understand what that means. And I'm fairly sure I never will."

"Oh." Tatta can see the cogs turn in Niragi's head. "But how do you... deal?", he finally asks and motions vaguely to his crotch. It's such a typical question but asked in such an innocent and non-judgmental way that it makes Tatta grin.

"I masturbate, just like most people do, I'm assuming."

"So that's something you're fine with?"

Tatta wonders how he ended up here, in this room, a thunderstorm roaring in the background, and with Niragi next to him, talking about masturbation of all things.

"Sure. It feels nice if I do it. I just can't imagine other people doing that to me. Or I can, it's just a terrible thought." He's quiet for a moment, but then he adds: "Kissing's fine, though. It's nice. Doesn't make me uncomfortable at all."

He doesn't really know why he felt the need to add that, and he doesn't think it will be relevant in the future, because while it looked like Niragi understood at first, he keeps his distance for the rest of the night and doesn't try to go for another "distraction", even though they're still bored and by themselves for quite a long period of time.

Much later, the two other Militants come back, still bickering but also with matching hickeys on their necks, and Niragi preoccupies himself with giving them hell. Tatta, meanwhile, is left with an inkling that Niragi probably lost all interest in kissing him, now that he knows he'll never get into his pants. It's not a new reaction to that kind of revelation, Tatta's experienced it plenty in the past, and it should relieve him, really, the knowledge that he won't be attacked by Niragi's surprise kisses anymore.

But somehow, it only makes him feel sad.

♡

For the next one, Tatta's kind of out of it.

It's a distraction again. Not because they're bored or stuck somewhere, but because Niragi's about to dislocate Tatta's thumb and needs him to forget the pain and fear and the pressure of the timer ticking away their last seconds on earth.

It's a shame Tatta can't really focus on it because he assumes that it will be the final one. They haven't kissed since that fateful night during the thunderstorm, partly because they didn't end up in games together all that often anymore, and partly because the Beach became hell on Earth for a hot second before spectacularly burning to the ground and leaving nothing but ash and shattered dreams.

(Mostly because Tatta scared Niragi away with his reluctance to get naked for anybody, but he tries to ignore that. They're surprisingly good ... well, he wouldn't say friends, more acquaintances, really, but it's good and Niragi's currently holding him and also all of their lives in his hands, so Tatta keeps his disappointment between parentheses where Niragi won't be able to find it.)

It's over quickly. There's no tongue involved this time, just lips swallowing his pained whimpers, arms cradling him against a lean but surprisingly strong chest, and eyes pressing closed but leaking tears nonetheless.

It's still nice and all through the pain of taking the bracelet off his wrist, the fear of still losing the game and the relief of seeing the score change, Tatta kind of wishes it could have gone on a little longer.

♡

For the ninth one - and wow, they've come a long way considering the fact that Tatta is Tatta and Niragi is Niragi and they very much shouldn’t fit together in any way whatsoever - Tatta kind of expects it.

Because you see, the thing is: Niragi's dying.

Not rapidly, but slowly and steadily, like the flow of blood that's seeping out of the gunshot wound in his side. Niragi's dying, and Tatta's there to witness it, and while he's kind of glad he didn't have to join the others for whatever the hell is currently happening up that tower with the Queen of Hearts blimp hovering above, he does not want to be where Niragi's dying, thank you very much.

Because it's a terrible sight.

Tatta's seen death. Kind of a lot. So much so that it could last him ten lifetimes. But this one, this one hurts. And he's stoically ignoring the reason why.

He's been sitting next to Niragi for a few hours now, feeling the life seep out of him through their clasped hands, Niragi's grip getting weaker and weaker by the minute.

They've been talking, somewhat like they had during that thunderstorm, but instead of sexual preferences, their topics revolved around their past. Tatta told Niragi about the time he almost decided to drop out of high school to become a comedian and Niragi laughed, telling him that he kind of already is one, but that he's glad that Tatta found an interest in mechanics and decided to stay in school and pursue his wish of owning a garage one day. "It suits you", he said between two coughs that sounded way too much like a death rattle of a wounded animal. "Making people laugh could be your side hustle. On TikTok, or something. I hear that's where all the kids are these days."

Niragi told him about his own time in high school and how fucked up people decided to be whenever there was somebody they thought deserved it for some reason or another. Told him about math and physics and space and all the things that fascinated him. Told him about his job and how he hated the actual work but loved the end product and how he'd never been prouder than the day he had found his name in the credits of his first game. It made Tatta want to try gaming too, just to see how many games he could find that had Niragi's name hidden away in them.

They aren't talking now. Tatta could, but he doesn't, because Niragi can't or shouldn't, and Tatta doesn't want to annoy him to death in addition to all that dying Niragi's already preoccupied with. 

The sky turned dark some time ago, the stars blinking down at them, happy little specks of light dancing in the night sky. Niragi has been staring up at them for a few minutes, lost in thought maybe, or trying to distract himself from the pain.

"Are the stars different here?", Tatta finally blurts out. "Or are they the same?"

Niragi turns his head, and his voice is raspy and weak, but Tatta leans closer and can understand him just fine. "They're different. Completely different. It was the thing that tipped me off about this not being reality anymore. Or maybe it is. Maybe it's just another reality. Or we've been transported to a different world all together. Who knows."

Tatta puts his head back and stares up at those stars, countless dots between a vast and infinite darkness. "They're still beautiful", he murmurs and when he looks back at Niragi, he sees him smile.

"Yeah, they are."

It feels kind of inevitable, after that. Their eyes meeting, the grip of their hands tightening, Niragi pulling Tatta down to meet his lips. It's gentle, oh so gentle, and Tatta tries his hardest not to hurt him even more.

He thinks Niragi's probably just doing it because he knows he's dying, only doing it with Tatta because he's conveniently there, would probably do this with a lot of different people if they were in Tatta's position right now.

He still enjoys it.

This time, when there's a bang, they don't break apart. Out of the corner of his eyes, Tatta can see fireworks exploding in the sky, but he doesn't stop kissing Niragi, only let's go of him when they have to make a decision.

And with his hand still in Niragi's grasp, and their eyes meeting, it's the easiest decision he ever had to make.

♡

The tenth time they kiss, or maybe it's actually the first time, they're at the hospital. 

Tatta really isn't sure about the whole Borderlands business, and it makes his head spin the longer he tries to even think about it. There, it had been months filled with violence (and kisses), but now people tell him that he'd died for only a minute or so before they'd brought him back.

He really wants to talk to Niragi, because surely, if anybody can understand the mumbo jumbo of words all those people throw around, the near-death experiences and time-stretching and mind-boggling and whatever the hell they've been piecing together from the memories of everyone that survived, it's Niragi.

Tatta also really wants to talk to Niragi for other reasons. Reasons related to feelings. Reasons that have nothing to do with being dead or half-dead or maybe-dead, and everything to do with kisses or half-kisses or maybe-kisses. Do they count if you only experience them in your mind?

Tatta isn't smart enough to figure this out, so he tries to find the one person who is, but when he asks, they only tell him that, yes, there's a Niragi Suguru among the meteor victims, and no, they can't tell him where he is, patient confidence and all that shit. He tells them to tell Niragi that he asked after him, and they tell him they will, but he doesn't believe them and he's too restless anyway to sit on his ass any longer than really necessary.

He waits until after midnight before slipping out of his bed and his room that he previously shared with another man, one he hadn't met in the Borderlands and who was very reluctant about speaking before being discharged a few days after Tatta had woken up as his involuntary roommate. He hasn't gotten a new roommate after that, and he's kind of glad.

Making sure not to run into any of the night personnel, he sneaks around corridors and peeks at name tags. If he doesn't find Niragi that night, he'll just try again tomorrow, and again after that. He's persistent like that now, and if that isn't a perfectly reasonable indicator of the Borderlands actually having happened, he doesn't know what would be.

He's in luck though, because just when he's about to give up, his toes freezing and his eyes droopy from the lack of sleep, he stumbles across a room that's sporting a name tag with a very familiar name on it. Tatta's heart skips a beat before beating twice as fast as compensation. He places his hand on the door handle but hesitates. What if Niragi doesn't want to see him? What if he's glad he's out of the Borderlands and doesn't want the remnants of it lying around to stumble over every step he takes?

Tatta shakes his head. He's come this far; he won't turn around now.

Carefully, he pushes the door handle down and the door open until he can see inside. The blinds are only partially closed, bathing the room in soft moonlight. It seems to be a single room, fairly small with a lone bed that's occupied by a figure sitting up and staring out of the window. The figure turns and Tatta sees eyes widen and that's all he needs. He stumbles into the room, almost forgetting to close the door behind him, and is at the bed in mere seconds. Niragi can't even open his mouth to voice his surprise before Tatta presses his lips against his.

It feels different than it did before. Maybe it's because this is real now, while everything before had just been a figment of his imagination. Maybe it's what happens when you die and come back a different person.

Maybe it's because Niragi turns completely stiff, not returning the kiss for even a single second.

Tatta breaks away with big eyes, panic rising in his chest. "I'm sorry. Oh god, I'm so sorry, do you not remember me?", he stammers. "I thought everybody did, but maybe you don't and now I've just barged in here and ambushed you with it like you did with me at the Beach by the way, but this is so bad, I'm so sorry, I-"

"Tatta", Niragi interrupts him finally, with a hand placed onto his arm and a small smile on his face. There are no piercings in his face, Tatta realized absentmindedly, they've probably taken them out for surgery or something, and it's kind of sad, because he thinks they would look really pretty glinting in the moonlight.

Then, his thoughts finally manage to catch up with what's happening in front of him, and he lets out a relieved sigh. "You do remember", he murmurs.

"Of course, I do", Niragi rolls his eyes. "How could I not remember you, honestly. I was just surprised, that's all."

"Oh", Tatta mumbles. "Why? Did you think I wasn't going to see you?"

Niragi shakes his head, his hand still on Tatta's arm. Tatta can feel the warmth of it seeping through the thin fabric of the shirt his mother had brought him the day before when she had come to visit him. "You've never kissed me before. Not by choice."

Tatta frowns. "Well, yeah. I mean, first you kind of just ambushed me with it. Like I said. And later, you didn't want me anymore."

Niragi frowns back at him. "What about me kissing you all the time gave you the impression that I didn't want you?"

"Me being ace. You didn't kiss me after I told you."

"I've just been imagining the kiss during the King of Clubs and the one at the end of the Second Stage then?", Niragi asks with a raised eyebrow. The missing piercing really bothers Tatta more than he thought it would.

"Those were desperate times that called for desperate measures", he argues, but he still clambers onto the mattress next to Niragi when Niragi makes space for him. It's cold, after all, and his toes are still freezing.

Niragi hisses when Tatta's feet make contact with his legs. He is only wearing shorts under the blanket, Tatta realizes, and isn't that a surprise after seeing him in nothing but dark jeans all those months they've known each other?

"That whole time in the Borderlands was a single desperate time that called for desperate measures, so I don't see how those last two times were any different." He goes silent, before adding: "They weren't for me."

Tatta squirms a little under Niragi's stare. "Well, I just assumed that after you realized I'm never going to sleep with you that the reason for kissing me was gone."

Niragi rolls his eyes again. "I didn't kiss you because I wanted to sleep with you."

"Why then?"

"Because I wanted to. Because it felt nice. And there weren't all that many things in that place that were just that. Nice, I mean. I was never bothered by you not wanting to have sex."

"Why aren't you, though? People usually are."

Niragi shrugs. "I don't know. Might be because I've always liked me-time best. I know what I like, and I know it best, so as long as you're not bothered by me having that, we're good."

There's a half-eaten chocolate donut on the bedside table. Tatta stares at it while he mulls over Niragi’s words in his head. "Does that mean you still want to kiss me? And ... be with me?" He really hopes his voice isn't as shaky as it feels. "Because we're not in that place anymore, and there are so many more nice things in this world than there were back then. Maybe you won't need me anymore."

Niragi sighs and wraps an arm around Tatta's shoulder. He doesn't look in too much pain, so Tatta hopes he's been healing properly. "Dumbass. Just because there are nice things here doesn't mean I don't want that very nice thing between us to continue. If you want that as well, that is."

Tatta nods and rests his head on Niragi's shoulder. "Yeah, I think I do."

They're silent for a while, both staring at the moon and the night sky that can be seen through the window. "They're right again", Niragi murmurs. "The stars. They're the real ones. It's the reason why I believe we're actually back. That we're not still in the Borderlands."

Tatta hadn't realized, but then again, he hadn't known they'd been wrong in the first place. It's fine though. He's got Niragi now to teach him all about it.

"I've got a question", he says finally after a few minutes. Niragi turns his head and looks at him, and Tatta thinks that his eyes bathed in moonlight are a lot more beautiful than the stars outside. "Can you go back to randomly kissing me now? Because I kinda miss it. A lot."

Niragi snorts. "Comedian", he says before closing the distance between them and Tatta finally gets to answer that question he had of Niragi's kisses and a chocolate donut.

He's very satisfied with the answer.