Work Text:
SSN 2 Ep 19 – The Q Word
“Pleeaaaaase,” Jackson begs for the fifth time. He’s been trying to convince Lucy to come out with him, Nolan and some of their friends from the Academy all week to celebrate hitting the twelve month mark. “It will be fun, we deserve a little mindless behaviour before we start the 30 day push,” he says.
Lucy thinks about it and decides she really should push herself. It’s been a few months now since the whole Caleb incident, she was finally seeing someone new so why not go out and socialize even if it’s at the same bar?
“Okay, fine, I’ll come,” she tells Jackson.
“Awesome! It will be so worth it!” he promises.
Lucy gets ready and takes a deep breath before leaving the safety of her bedroom.
It’s just a bar, you’ll be with your friends, your friends who are cops, she reminds herself.
Thankfully Lucy survives the night at the bar without a panic attack or trauma response. She loves watching everyone have a great time and tell stories. She decides to call it an early night but what her friends don’t know is that she’s really calling Emmett.
“So he’s not your boyfriend?” Tim clarifies after their run-in with Lang.
“No, I mean we just started seeing each other, also why do you even care? I thought we weren’t talking about my personal life, remember?” She says with teasing tone to her voice.
“We aren’t and I don’t care, not really, but it is clearly been affecting your mood so I just want to know if when this thing ends if you’ll have some kind of emotional breakdown that I’ll have to put up with while you sulk in the shop,” he says back making it clear that he isn’t being serious.
“Oh well thanks for the vote of confidence, I’m so glad you have so much faith in me and Emmett making this work,” she says as he rolls her eyes at him.
“You’re welcome."
Lucy is sat sulking at a desk and Tim decides against his better judgement to go and talk to her.
“What’s go you so upset? And if you say it was me being hard on you out there,” he starts saying.
“It wasn’t,” she says sharply, “this has nothing to do with you. You were right, I was being sloppy. I wasn’t thinking and you made sure to call me on it, so thank you,” she says as she looks up at him to meet his eyes.
“You’re right, I was right, but I was a little extra intense,” he admits.
Lucy looks at him in disbelief.
“Look, today was intense and knowing that Rios made a mistake that might cost him his life, it just reminded me how quickly things can change on the job. Being a cop means things around you are always unpredictable, so we have protocols and rules in place to help us control our environment,” he says.
“Like not holding crime scene tape in your gun hand,” Lucy says.
“Exactly; so when I’m being a pain in your ass it’s because I don’t want you to forget when you’re out on those streets by yourself in a month,” he tells her.
“Thanks,” she says quietly.
She's grateful for Tim never letting up on her. He pushes her no matter what and it's only made her a better stronger cop. With the last 30 days of her probationary period about to start she knows Tim will make sure she survives it even if he makes it incredibly difficult. She's not sure if it's just because he actually believes she can handle it or if it's because he cares about her. She likes to think it's both.
Lucy hangs up the phone and her heart hurts. She feels a burning in her throat and in her eyes but she can’t cry; she won’t.
But Chris is dead.
“Hey, are you okay?” she hears a voice ask from the driver’s seat of the shop.
“Um ya,” she says shaking her head, “I’ll be okay. Have to focus on the work, the things that are tangible right?” she says.
“Right, good, but um, Lucy?” Tim says gently.
“Ya?” she asks looking at him doing her best to hold back her tears.
“I’m sorry,” he tells her.
“Thanks,” she says, “I told him stories the other night, about things that have happened while on the job,” she says to distract herself.
“Oh ya, which ones? The time I stole your duty belt? Or the baby powder IED?” He asks with a grin.
“No,” she says smiling, “I told him about the prison break, when you said that epic line about never being alone in the LAPD,” she says.
“That was a really good line, I did time that perfectly,” he says proudly.
“Yes, you did, although I don’t think you need to be reminded, but it is a great story,” she admits.
“It’s not bad,” Tim agrees while quickly looking over at her and giving her a soft smile.