Archive of Our Own

I love thee to the depth and breadth and height

My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight

For the ends of being and ideal grace.

I love thee to the level of every day’s

Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.

–Elizabeth Barrett Browning

“When you see a fairy ring in the forest of Vanarana, take care to not step into it. The seelies are not malicious, but they will take your body and soul to their realm.”

The truth is, Kaveh is often unlucky.

Luck has never been on his side. He lost his father at age six, and then his mother at eighteen. Lost his home to his mother’s debtors at age nineteen. Almost lost his art scholarship at twenty–almost, because he managed to scrape by and graduated on time. Got a job and a new apartment shortly after, thank the archons, though he was almost always late on rents and he was still drowning in tuition debt. Caught his boyfriend sleeping with his older neighbor. Then got fired three days later.

At age twenty-six, Kaveh is almost done with life.

So when he accidentally steps on a fairy ring in the woods and faints one second later, he gives the archons one last curse and succumbs to the darkness.

Kaveh must be dreaming.

He’s woken up in a rather cozy room, a blue blanket tucked around his body. The curtain is drawn, so he can see that it’s almost dark outside, the gold of daylight darkens into muted shades of purple. It’s an unfamiliar room and unfamiliar ceilings, but his brain short-circuits when he sees someone in the room with him.

Someone… or something .

There’s no other explanation aside from a mushroom-induced wild dream for the creature sitting quietly in front of him, staring at him with glinting emerald eyes. He’s not human, that much Kaveh’s certain. Something heavy is cloaking the person–creature–and almost suffocates Kaveh. It’s the same heavy feeling he gets when he passes the outer part of Vanarana’s vast forest, the feeling of a powerful non-human creature being near.

He’s a fae , his sluggish brain supplies helpfully.

Although a part of him has always known that the fae folks are real, seeing one in front of him is still a shock.

“Where… am I?” 

The creature seems to straighten. “I assumed you somehow fell through one of the barriers in the mortal realm.”

Kaveh mouths to himself. Mortal realm . “Am I dead?”

“Of course not. You just got yourself stuck here.”

Kaveh looks out the window. He doesn’t feel weird or anything, and even if his surroundings’s a bit too quiet–a dead giveaway for the fact that he’s not in always-bustling Sumeru–the peace is a welcome one. He is  little bit sore and a tiny bit hungry though. “And where is here ?”

The creature still stares at him. “You’re in what mortals like you call ‘Otherworld’. For me, it’s just our realm.”

“You’re really a fae,” Kaveh breathes out. “Oh, archons .”

“I suppose that’s what you call us, yes.”

A fae . Kaveh has managed to land himself in the Otherworld.

Of course. Of course. With his shitty luck, of course, Kaveh completely left his human world and straight into the Otherworld.

He doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Kaveh’s mother loved to spin tales about the fae–the fair folks, she would whisper in the darkness of Kaveh’s childhood bedroom–and Kaveh grew up reading and hearing a lot about the race that supposedly lived around humans. People in Sumeru usually pay some degree of respect toward the fae–there are rules for kids who go into the forests. Kaveh listened even though he never went into the forest on his own.

Kaveh eyes the fae in front of him. From the deep rumbling voice, Kaveh probably can safely assume that the fae is a he . The fae sits in the shadows so Kaveh can’t quite discern how he looks, but he seems big–bigger than Kaveh, at least. He clenches the blanket covering his lap.

“My name is Kaveh.”

The fae stands at his full height and steps out of the shadows, into the weak light coming from outside. He’s probably a head taller than Kaveh, and now that Kaveh starts to pay attention, he finally registers his features. The fae in front of him is wearing human clothes, but he can’t hide the gray fur that covers his body. His head is definitely feline–he reminds Kaveh of a snow leopard with his spots of darker fur. His feet and hands are actually paws . Despite his animalistic appearance, his Sumerian speech is clear and from his appearance, Kaveh guesses that this guy, whoever he is, is someone powerful –he remembers his mother telling him that the more human a fae looks, the more powerful they are. 

“Little mortal, you would be wise to remember to never give your name to a fae.”

Kaveh freezes.

A name holds power over its owner. The most commonly known rule in Teyvat when dealing with fae is to never give them your name–and Kaveh dumbly gave this creature power over him. In his haze, Kaveh has done the stupidest thing he ever knew.

The creature hums. “I suppose you can call me Hai.”

Kaveh swallows his nerves. “Will you use my name against me?”

The fae seems to consider something. “No. I don’t want anything from you, so it’s useless to wield your name now.” Kaveh bristles. “But the fair folk are not so merciful, and you are better off remembering not to give them your name.”

Kaveh nods mutely.

Hai’s right. He’s in a realm not his own and the rules that apply to humans don’t apply to the fae folk. Kaveh needs to be more careful with what he says and does, lest he’d land himself into even deeper trenches than he already is in.

“I need to return…” Kaveh trails off before he can say home . Can he even call Sumeru City home, after everything?

“Not right now.”

“Why not?”

“It will take someone of a great fae magic to help you return. Right now, the barriers between the realms are strong, and the portal in which you came through was closed for some reason.”

Just his luck. Kaveh closes his eyes and tries to will away the tears that threaten to spill.

He’s exhausted. With all the things that lead to him being in this predicament, Kaveh just wants to rest. 

Hai sighs. “You can stay here for a while. I will take you to the court on Samhain next month–someone will be able to help you return to your realm.”

“Someone?”

“The fae who belong in the court are very powerful. They have enough magic to open a barrier to your realm. Ordinary fae won’t be able to cross realms, let alone weaken a barrier so you can step through. A high-ranking fae can help you.”

“And we can only do it during Samhain?”

“Not really. But the court will be more open towards strangers on Samhain–they will be hosting a party–and the barriers between realms are the weakest on Samhain night.”

The fae takes a step toward the door. “I have dinner ready. You are too pale and thin.” 

“Is the food safe to eat for humans?”

“Of course.”

“My mom said fae food is bad for humans.”

Hai gives him a deadpan look. “If you enjoy being starving until Samhain, then be my guest.” He turns and opens the door. 

His stomach starts to protest, and Kaveh scrambles off the bed to follow Hai.

The next day, Kaveh wakes up slowly.

After a rather tense dinner last night with his quiet host, Kaveh retreated back to his room, leaving Hai in the living room with a book in hand, the fireplace roaring with warmth. Kaveh had wanted to join Hai, but he seemed content to be alone and Kaveh didn’t want to disturb his host.

Kaveh takes a few minutes burrowing into his blankets, warm and feeling somewhat safe. Despite living with a creature that could very well end his life in an instant, he knows Hai won’t just kill him for fun. He just has to be careful in this realm–he doesn’t want to end up dead just yet.

He rises from bed and pads out of the room. The wooden floor is warm under his feet and his nose leads him to the kitchen, where Hai sits with another book in hand, drinking something from a porcelain cup.

“Is that coffee?”

Hai shakes his head. “It’s not. I don’t have coffee. But I have tea.” His eyes glint, emerald-green with bursts of sunset-orange in the middle. “You are welcome to eat whatever you want.”

Kaveh eyes him. “You don’t eat.”

“I do,” Hai looks away. “I… just can’t cook very well.” 

“Ah.” Kaveh carefully examines the cabinets. It’s unreal how familiar everything looks–do the fae folk copy humans, or vice versa? Kaveh tucks the question away and grabs a mug to fill it with warm water. Hai silently pushes a tin of loose tea, which Kaveh puts inside a small golden strainer before dunking it into the water.

“What would you like to eat?” Kaveh asks after he downs half of his mug.

Hai shrugs minutely. “I am not picky.”

Nodding to himself, Kaveh stands. “May I look around your kitchen?”

Hai nods. Kaveh notices a basket of fresh fruit on the counter–they look somewhat familiar, but he’ll need to ask what they are. There are eggs and flour on the cabinets, enough ingredients for him to make some pancakes. The simple appliances in Hai’s kitchen are mostly wooden and porcelain, so Kaveh uses wooden plates and spoons to serve his breakfast. Kaveh might be imagining it, but he swears he sees a hint of a smile when he serves Hai a plate of pancakes and cut fruits.

And his daily life in the Otherworld starts to form a routine.

Hai lives in a cottage deep within the forest, with no apparent neighbors as far as Kaveh can see. He takes the time to explore the area surrounding the cottage, enjoying to sit in the small garden overlooking a frozen river. The cottage is big, though, bigger than Kaveh’s old home, and definitely more than one person can occupy, but even after a couple days, nobody ever visits Hai. When Kaveh asks about it, Hai only says that he has nobody else in his family and that he lives alone.

Every morning, he sees three pixies leaving baskets of groceries and food outside the door, chattering and giggling as they do so. They flutter in the air shyly and leave trails of fae dust behind after they drop off the baskets. Kaveh can only see them from the window and wave when the pixies look at him.

Hai doesn’t cook, and on the third day of his stay, Kaveh officially takes over the kitchen, glad for the familiarity of the ingredients that he finds. Hai hums approvingly when Kaveh serves him a plate of fatteh and he eats it with minimal complaints.

“I think I like it spicy,” Hai muses out loud when Kaveh makes stew of mushrooms and meat, and adds some things that resemble peppers to Hai’s plate–he says resemble , because while they are shaped like a regular pepper and smell just like a pepper, they are blue . Kaveh makes a note of it and adds more to Hai’s plate every time.

Hai has a large collection of books in one of the rooms, arranged to resemble a library. A very messy library, unfortunately. Kaveh takes a moment to peruse the books but gives up soon after–he can’t read the fae language, and the small number of books in various languages in Teyvat are all encyclopedias. Driven by sheer boredom, Kaveh tries to clean up Hai’s library so it looks a little bit neater. He finds an empty notebook and a couple charcoal sticks on the table, though, so Kaveh uses them to sketch things. He spends the afternoons gazing out the library’s window and sketching until the sun starts to set and it’s time for him to make dinner.

He tries not to think about his realm. He has no one there. He’s lost his family and he’s lost his job. Definitely not his cheater boyfriend. He vaguely thinks about his small apartment but it’s already paid for the next three months. Come to think of it, living here is not so bad, not when what he needs is readily available, thanks to his generous host.

And he has to admit, he rather enjoys Hai’s company–not that he’d say it to the fae.

Living with someone else who doesn’t demand things from him is a novelty and Kaveh is internally grateful for it. While he feels the need to return Hai’s kindness, Hai never asks Kaveh to do it. 

And much to Kaveh’s surprise, Hai is intelligent . His arguments are always well-constructed, even if his manner of speaking is somewhat stiff. Despite Hai’s penchant to say things bluntly, Hai never actually says things that are not true. 

“Fae doesn’t have needs to copy everything humans do,” Hai says when Kaveh comments on the similarities he finds in Hai’s cottage with common homes in Sumeru City. “But humans always have a way of making things simple for themselves, and as long as we can substitute things with non-metal, we can use human inventions.”

“Have you ever visited the human realm?”

“Once. It was unpleasant.” Hai’s mouth forms a grimace. “It was too crowded and polluted.”

Kaveh hums and stirs his soup. “Heh. Even as a human, Sumeru City is a little bit too much.”

Kaveh decides to venture into the nearest village after seven days of sequestering himself inside the cottage–and resting because Archon knows when he will ever get this much rest in the future. The cottage is on a hill and he can see the roofs scattered between the trees. His curiosity wins.

But first, he needs to find Hai. He’s not brave enough to just walk through the forest willy-nilly, and he values his life too much to wander around the Otherworld’s forest alone.

He finds Hai reading in his favorite spot, near the large windows that face the frozen river. The book Hai’s reading seems to be in Liyuen since Kaveh recognizes the characters–he wonders how adept Hai is with Teyvat’s languages and how he obtained the books filling his personal library.

“Hai.”

Hai hums and turns another page.

“Can you accompany me to the village?”

Hai looks up from his book. “Why do you want to go?”

Kaveh gingerly sits close to Hai, careful not to touch him. “I just want to go outside and explore. Please?”

“No. I don’t want to see people.”

“You haven’t left this house in seven days,” Kaveh grumbles. “And that’s only because I’m here that I counted. Did you even get out before? I bet you’ve already been here alone for weeks.”

“I wasn’t alone. The pixies come to get me food.”

“So you are aware of their presence!”

“I don’t like to talk to other fae.”

“You need to socialize more.”

“Fae are not social creatures the way humans are, Kaveh.”

Kaveh rises to his feet. “You can stand to have some more company, you know.” Kaveh eyes Hai. Maybe it’s okay for him to go alone. “I’ll go alone then.”

Hai closes his book. “Alright. I’ll come with you.”

Cheering internally, Kaveh rushes to his room and grabs some of his things, before rushing back to the library. Hai has already donned a black cape, covering his entire body and the hood hides the upper part of his face. He’s also holding another smaller cape.

“Wear this.”

Kaveh runs his fingers across the fabric. It’s solid under his fingers and upon wearing it, it’s just like he’s wearing a comfortable thick silk. The cape is not heavy and falls around his body nicely, covering almost his entire body.

“Don’t ever tell your full name to other fae,” Hai warns. He unlocks the door and lets Kaveh step out first. “A name wields power. Do not let other fae have it.”

Kaveh glances up. “Does this mean Hai is not your name?”

Hai locks the door and together they set out through the small path out of the forest. Kaveh walks close to Hai’s larger frame, mostly for warmth but also for safety. The fact that Hai is much bigger than him thrills him and makes him feel safer. He at least can be confident that Hai is not going to hurt him.

“Hai is part of my name,” the fae beside him rumbles. 

Kaveh is careful to pay attention to his surroundings. The farther they get from the cottage, the more the sunlight warms his skin. The forest is quiet, but it’s not the bated silence that heralds a storm, simply that the voices are muted. Everything around him is more brilliant and bright, even the sun seems way brighter that it is in Sumeru. It is something that he never experienced in Sumeru, even within the forest surrounding Sumeru City, the bustle from the city was too overwhelming sometimes.

He also notes with curiosity how the vegetation is similar in looks to what he’s known in Sumeru. Some of them glint or glow rather menacingly, but some of them are foreign flowers resembling Sumeru’s padisarah or roses, except these have patterns on their petals or are colored rather weirdly. The trees’ canopy is thick enough to block most sunlight, but under the rays that break through, Kaveh sees small creatures dancing around and chirping.

“Watch out.” Hai’s voice snaps him out of his reverie, his grip around his shoulder strong but not painful. Kaveh skids to a stop right next to a river–not frozen, wider than the one he can see from the cottage, the frothing current sweeping past them in loud gurgles.

“Ah.” Kaveh takes a step back, bumping into Hai’s chest. “ Archons .”

“There’s no bridge, so we have to be careful.”

Hai jumps down in one graceful leap, stopping just at the edge of the raging river. It’s fairly wide, probably around ten meters in width. He holds out his arms toward Kaveh and something in his chest clenches.

Kaveh may be stupid for getting attached to his host, especially after the disaster that was his relationship. Especially in his current predicament.

“Come. I’ll catch you.”

Kaveh closes his eyes and jumps .

For one second, the horrifying feeling of being untethered floods him, but it’s immediately over when two arms close around his torso. He opens his eyes and looks down, straight to Hai’s emerald eyes. This close, the specks of gold in his eyes are even more prominent, glinting almost dangerously. Hai smells like tea and old parchment, and he’s so warm. Something hot zips along his spine and Kaveh almost trembles from the force of a sudden want that fills him. 

“Hold on to me,” Hai instructs. “I’ll jump over the river, okay?”

Kaveh nods, heart in his throat, fingers curled into Hai’s muscled shoulder.

And in one powerful push, Hai leaps over to the middle of the river, his feet landing securely on the wet stones, and takes another leap. Kaveh feels his breath leaving in a punched-out rush. The water roars loudly around them. Another two leaps, and they’re safely on the other side, Kaveh still hanging off Hai’s shoulders.

Hai loosens his arms and Kaveh slides down, his feet a little wobbly from the adrenaline. For a few seconds, Kaveh lets himself lean against Hai and Hai lets him. His fur is a little damp but his body is an anchor for Kaveh’s sudden wandering thoughts.

How would it feel to kiss him?

Kaveh wrenches himself away, stopping that train of thought. 

He can’t .

Seemingly unaware of Kaveh’s internal monologue, Hai starts walking and Kaveh scrambles to follow him. The trees are less dense in this part of the forest, so Kaveh can enjoy the sun warming his skin. The mild breeze caresses his hair and he sees Hai’s fur moving slightly with the breeze.

His eyes catch a swift movement from their side but Hai doesn’t react, simply grunts when whatever it is hits him on the nose–a tiny pixy, gleefully dancing around Hai. Not long after, several other tiny creatures surround them, keeping their distance but close enough for Kaveh to hear them chattering. They are way tinier than the ones delivering their foods, probably only as tall as Kaveh’s pinky. They also approach Kaveh in a more careful manner, their chatters gaining a more fevered pitch.

Hai stops and says something in fae, causing the creatures to disperse. They wave goodbye before flying away in a flurry of multicolored glitters and squeals, Kaveh watches with awe and shyly offers a wave back.

“They like you.”

Kaveh looks at Hai. Hai watches him with something akin to amusement in his eyes, his lips soft in a subdued smile. Kaveh wants to taste it.

“Shame I can’t talk to them.” Kaveh lets Hai guide him across a shallow stream and a long stone path toward the first of the buildings. The canopy of trees opens up to a large clearing of grass and shrubs surrounding the buildings. Hai pulls his hood up and Kaveh does the same.

“Stay close to me.”

One way to describe the village–or more aptly a town--is bustling . Fae in their various forms walk around freely around him, the jumbled voices of a busy street rising in the air. Kaveh can’t discern any of it since everything is in Fae, although he can recognize some of the activities based on their gestures. The street is lined with stores and open carts of strange products with zealous sellers trying to peddle their wares. 

For a race so otherworldly, Fae often reminds him of humans, and that also raises the question of how often the two races collide. As far as he knows–of what Hai told him anyway–the fae folk don’t like going up to the human realm, and only unlucky ones even crossed realms like Kaveh.

Kaveh keeps his hood up, pressed close against Hai’s side. However, even his trepidation can’t completely diminish his excitement. The Otherworld, after all, is a place so elusive, that he’s only heard about from third-hand accounts. Kaveh had never actually expected to even see the realm and yet here he is.

He knows people talk about the creatures that live in Sumeru’s vast forests and knows that kids often go to the edge of Vanarana’s ancient ground for a chance to see the fae. Kaveh never tried going to Vanarana when he was a kid, first because he was uninterested. And when his father died, he spent all his time at home taking care of his mother, any semblance of normal childhood dissipating each day with his mother’s deteriorating mental state. Eventually, she succumbed and died after Kaveh’s nineteenth birthday, Kaveh had more or less forgotten about things that were not essential for his survival.

And so it’s not with a small amount of curiosity that he’s watching the hustle and bustle of the village–now that he’s here, it doesn’t feel as small as it looks. Somehow it’s also resembling the busy Treasure Street in Sumeru City. A sudden pang of homesickness hits him, making him stop.

I’ll go back there , Kaveh reassures himself.

“Kaveh?”

“I’m fine,” Kaveh forces a smile. “I was just remembering stuff from… home.”

Hai tugs him back close. “Three more weeks.”

Only three more weeks. But why isn’t he excited?

Why does his heart suddenly yearn for a place in this realm?

Their excursion ends with them having loads of things and foods Kaveh has never seen before.

Hai shows a remarkable amount of patience with Kaveh, who stops and stares at several carts. When he sees one selling watercolors and papers, he looks imploringly at Hai, who just sighs and fishes out his coin pouch. Hai is also surprisingly game for anything Kaveh wants to eat, and when the sky finally turns golden and purple, they trek back to their cottage with full stomachs and arms laden with their purchases.

“It’s so generous of you to take me here,” Kaveh says. Hai just hums.

“No problem. As you said, I needed to interact with more people.” And Hai did. He was the one talking to the merchants in Fae, even when he felt like Hai was still too quiet. And Kaveh is truly grateful, because he gets insight on how the fae interact with each other. He itches to sketch the wonderful creatures he’s seen–and Hai.

The more he stays with the fae, the more his heart yearns for something else–something more . It might have been his loneliness talking, but Hai makes him feel all kinds of feelings. Even when the fae likes to argue with him, Kaveh still likes to talk with him.

“Hai.”

“Yes?”

“Do the fae marry?”

Hai glances at him. “Why are you asking me that?” Hai bends down and sweeps Kaveh in one smooth motion, startling Kaveh to a strangled squeak. The river is just ahead of them now.

“I was curious.”

“Well, we do have family and we can produce offspring.” The rumble from Hai’s chest is comforting. Just like before, he takes several powerful leaps across the river.

But instead of putting Kaveh down, he keeps Kaveh in his embrace.

“I can walk,” Kaveh protests, but he doesn’t make any movement to get off Hai’s strong arms. “You can put me down now.”

“It’s getting darker. I don’t want you to trip over some stones and break your neck.”

Kaveh pouts but he says nothing, simply holding their bags of stuff with his right hand and looping his left around Hai’s neck. The soft fur tickles his skin.

“Are you a hybrid or something?” Kaveh wonders aloud, his fingers fiddling with the fur. “Do the fae even birth hybrids?”

Hai exhales. “I was… cursed.”

“Cursed?”

Hai doesn’t speak for a few more moments. The darkness enveloping the forest hides Hai’s face. “I did have a human form. With no fur and feline face,” Hai murmurs. Beyond the soft words, Kaveh can only hear the sounds of the forest, softly enveloping them. “Someone put a curse on me, in the hope of me learning a lesson.”

Kaveh’s heart aches. “Can you break it?”

“Yes. When I’ve learned my lesson.”

Kaveh doesn’t say anything else, sensing Hai’s reluctance to elaborate further.

“I hope you can break it.” The day’s exhaustion finally catches on him, and Kaveh yawns. “I don’t know if this form hinders you from doing anything, but I hope you can soon return to normal.”

“I like the way it is now.”

“And why is that?”

Hai snorts but doesn’t answer. Not long after, they arrive at the cottage. Hai murmurs something and the lights surrounding the building start to light up.

Kaveh’s about to ask Hai to drop him when he feels Hai stiffen.

“What’s wrong?”

Something–or someone–emerges from the cottage. His form is of a short man with long white hair and pointed ears. He’s in a brown cloak and holding a long staff, expression stoic. His eyes glow red when he looks at Hai.

“She was right,” the man murmurs in the language of common Teyvat. “You do have a company. A human, at that.”

“None of your business.”

The man tilts his head. “Did you think she wouldn’t find out about the mortal?”

Hai says something in fae and hugs Kaveh closer. The man retorts with something snarky, his eyes never leaving Hai and Kaveh. Kaveh shivers. The man is exuding the same scary aura he felt the first time he saw Hai.

“You’re coming with me to see her.”

Hai growls. “She said she’d leave me alone.”

The short man scoffs. “Not when you are sheltering a mortal.”

“He poses no threats.”

Kaveh’s heart begins to race. They’re talking about him . But why would they? He’s been here a week and Hai says he has nobody. Unless–

“Are you not supposed to let me live here?”

“You could have sent him back to Teyvat. Do you know that for the one week he’s been here, he’s lost one month of his mortal life?”

Kaveh snaps his head around. “Is that true?”

Hai doesn’t answer.

“Either way, you’re coming with me, do mhórgacht .”

Hai gently lets Kaveh off, and Kaveh tries to stand tall even when his knees lock.

Hai says something in fae again. The man nods his head in a shallow bow, and takes another glance at Kaveh, before he leaps up and disappears between the trees.

“Who was that?”

Hai pushes him inside the cottage. “An old acquaintance.” He crouches so Kaveh can stare at his eyes on the same level. “Stay here. I will need to go for a moment.”

“Where are you going?”

Hai looks hesitant. “I will explain when I return. Will you trust me?”

When he first met Hai, his instincts warned him not to trust the fae, and yet.

Yet Kaveh willingly offered him his name. Drank the honey water Hai gave him. Eat at the same table with him.

Somehow, despite all his instincts saying otherwise, he trusts Hai.

Trusts a powerful creature that may snap his body in half should he wish to.

So Kaveh nods, and Hai takes a few steps back, eyes never leaving Kaveh’s.

Hai stands there, bare feet firm on the grass, and the moonlight makes him resplendent in his glory. His fur moves slightly with the light breeze, fully enveloping himself in the cloak of power he always keeps tucked away.

Hai speaks, a lilting voice with unknown melodies, words weaving in the air with unseen power. There’s electricity crackling over Kaveh’s skin, raising his goosebumps. 

“Hai.”

Hai’s two-toned eyes focus on Kaveh and his lips stop moving. There’s an alien glow to his eyes and they suck Kaveh into a whirlpool of emotions that he can’t begin to tangle–nor does he want to. He’s content to be by Hai’s side, damn the consequences. 

“Remember to lock the door and do not leave the house until I return,” Hai commands, his voice distorted. “It’s for your safety, little mortal.”

Nodding with his heart in his throat, Kaveh steps back and closes the door, quickly locking it. He hears a neigh and peeks outside just in time to see Hai jump onto a black horse’s back. Sitting atop the horse with glowing with mane, Hai looks majestic and every bit of otherworldly creature that he is. Hai glances back for a split second before he urges his horse forward with a powerful kick.

Kaveh stays near the window until the horse disappears from view.

Hai doesn’t return when the sun rises. Kaveh is prepared for it, but it still sucks. Remembering Hai’s warning the night before, Kaveh keeps the doors locked and the blinds closed, determined to stay as quiet as possible. He spends the day sketching in the library and eating snacks they got from the village yesterday, too wound up with nerves to actually cook something. He keeps glancing toward the front door, waiting for Hai’s return.

Hai still doesn’t return the next day.

Now getting anxious, Kaveh paces around the house. He can’t help it–he’s worried about Hai. Half the day he spends sleeping on the couch, waiting for Hai. Afterward, Kaveh busies himself with cleaning the cottage, completely ignoring his rumbling stomach. There isn’t a lot to do because he tries to keep the house tidy, and he’s starting to clean the sink when he hears a horse’s long neigh and powerful stomps.

Kaveh drops the brush he’s holding and runs to the front door, just in time for Hai to unlock it and steps through the door. His fur is matted and he seems to limp a little, but his shoulders drop when their eyes meet.

“Kaveh.”

The name is exhaled from rough breath, but somehow, Kaveh feels it reverberating through his body.

“Hai… are you okay?”

Hai just nods. Kaveh takes a step forward just in time to catch Hai in his arms as he slumps down, eyes dropping close.

“Hai!”

Kaveh cradles his head on his lap, hands frantic over Hai’s face–the usually soft fur is wet and sticky, skin alarmingly cold. With some efforts, he manages to move Hai near the fireplace, the carpeted floor and myriads of pillows serving as a nice space for Hai to lie down. He also adds more woods to the fireplace, casting the cottage in golden warmth. Kaveh sits next to his slumbering body, a book in hands, but for some reasons Hai’s exhausted features draws his eyes.

Even through the few weeks Kaveh has spent with Hai, something about the man–fae–enchants him. He doesn’t know what makes Hai attractive, just that he wants to stay beside him for a little while. Which is ridiculous, because Hai is a fae and Kaveh is just a human.

Hai sleeps for what feels like days for Kaveh, leaving Kaveh with his thoughts. In reality, the sun has just started rising when Hai moves in his makeshift bed and opens his teal-sunset eyes. He watches Kaveh watching him, something unreadable in his eyes.

“Did something happen?”

Hai doesn’t answer and closes his eyes back instead. Kaveh crawls toward him, finger reaching out to touch Hai’s sleeve. Hai’s no longer as damp as he was when he returned, but his skin’s still cold to touch.

“Hai, answer me!”

“It’s fae matters, Kaveh,” Hai answers, eyes still closed. “Are you not tired? Go to sleep in your own bed.”

“Not until you answer me.”

“Stubborn human.” Hai mutters, eyes still closed. “We’re not actually supposed to keep mortals in the Otherworld. Time flows differently here and in your realm, and having humans in the Otherworld is dangerous for both you and us.”

Kaveh tries to digest it. “But if you’re not supposed to keep humans here… what happens when you can’t send them back?”

“We kill them.”

Kaveh goes quiet for a few minutes, mind going miles a minute. Hai didn’t kill him–he decided to keep him in his house, practically hidden for a week. He’s not surprised that he was found out, not when the pixies are their frequent visitors.

“Why didn’t you kill me?”

Hai opens one eye. “Would you want me to kill you?”

“No,” Kaveh says slowly. “But why?”

“Sleep, Kaveh.”

“Hey! You promised you would explain!”

Hai sighs. “Not yet. Tomorrow. Please.”

Pursing his lips, he moves to stand. Something grips his wrist hard and Kaveh stumbles right onto Hai’s chest, face smushed in the soft fur. 

“Sleep, Kaveh.”

Kaveh tries to push him off futilely. “We haven’t had dinner yet, Hai.”

“ A ghrá .” The words make Kaveh shiver. 

“What does that mean?”

Hai grunts, almost sounding petulant. Kaveh sighs. “Alright, alright. We’re gonna sleep.”

“Yes. Sleep.”

The steady up and down of Hai's chest and the warmth of his body slowly lull Kaveh to sleep. And as he feels his consciousness slips away, he can’t help but think that he doesn’t mind staying here forever.

But despite Hai’s promise, he never actually tells Kaveh anything about what happened after they went back from the village and where he disappeared to. And Kaveh doesn’t push, content to stay quiet and bask in the small touches Hai starts to dole out.

It starts with a hand on his nape, warm and heavy. A fleeting touch on Kaveh’s hair. A barely-there touch on his hand. One day, the pixies show up with another smaller basket aside from their usual baskets of products. When Kaveh opens it, he’s surprised to see the hairpins and some drawing tools.

“Did you get these for me?” Kaveh wonders aloud, holding up the basket. Hai nods. “Will you help me braid my hair?”

Hai’s fingers are clumsy and tug at Kaveh’s blond hair a few times, but Kaveh ignores it and leans against Hai’s chest slightly. In the end, the braid is kinda messy, the hairpins lopsided, but it’s still cute in its own way. Kaveh squeezes Hai’s hands in gratitude.

“Thank you. It looks lovely.”

Hai shakes his head. “They’re not neat.”

“It’s alright. I like it.”

Kaveh might have been imagining it, but Hai’s cheeks darken under his fur.

And for the next two weeks, Kaveh lives in a blissful state of companionship with Hai, and the more he spends time with him, the more he doesn’t want to leave.

Is it possible to feel at home in a place he’s only been staying at for two weeks?

And Samhain is only a week away.

Kaveh looks out the window, a frown on his face. He only has one week left with Hai–and truthfully, he wants more time with him. Wants more time to spend bickering in the library. Wants more time to cook for the fae. Wants more time to learn about Hai’s life.

Archons , has he fallen in love with the fae?

“Kaveh?”

Startled out of his thoughts, Kaveh turns. “Yeah?”

Hai looks at him strangely. “You’re okay?”

Kaveh steps away from the window. “I’m okay.”

As he approaches Hai, he realises that Hai is wearing his cloak and is holding Kaveh’s cloak. Kaveh raises a brow. “Where are you going, Hai?”

“Somewhere,” Hai says quietly. “I need to talk to you about some things. But not here.”

Kaveh nods and fastens the cloak around his body, and follows Hai out of the house. He’s startled to see a black stallion waiting for them in the garden–the same black stallion he saw two weeks ago.

Kaveh squeaks when he feels to large hands circling his waist–carefully, as if Kaveh breaks so easily–and lifts him onto the horse. Hai jumps behind him and cradles him in his arms, his hands holding the rein.

The horse shifts under them and with large gallops, they shoot off, away from the cottage and deeper into the forest. Kaveh holds on to Hai’s arms, feeling the cold breeze in his hair and face. The forest passes by in a blur of dark shapes and he can’t hear anything past the loud neighs and the wind rush, but behind him, Hai’s heart beats steadily against his back.

It takes them a long time to go to the place Hai wants, but Kaveh doesn’t care, not when he’s warm and safe where he is. When the horse slows to a canter, Kaveh looks up to see a glittering lake, and beyond it, a large tree-like structure lights up with dots of lamps.

“Where are we?”

Hai jumps down and carefully manhandles Kaveh off the horse. Hai then guides Kaveh to sit on a small patch of clearing close to the lake.

“The Divine Tree,” Hai points to the tree. “And the Seelie Court.”

Kaveh jolts. “What? I thought we’d be coming here in a week?!” He thought he’d have more time!

Hai closes his eyes. “You can leave for your realm tonight if you want. Samhain is close enough and the barriers are already weakened.”

Clenching his hands, Kaveh shakes his head. “No. I thought I was leaving in a week.”

“Kaveh, you’ve lost three months of your life already, by staying here,” Hai’s teal-sunset eyes are boring into Kaveh’s. “You need to go back before you lose even more.”

Kaveh scrambles to his feet. “I don’t care!”

“You should.” Hai stands and grips Kaveh’s shoulders. “Kaveh, listen to me. It’s dangerous for you to stay here for any longer. You need to return immediately.”

“You’ve kept me here for three weeks! What’s a week more?!” Kaveh cries out. “And if you want to force me back, shouldn’t you listen to me first?”

“Why don’t you want to return?” Hai shakes him, his usual monotone voice rising. “Kaveh, I can’t let you stay here!”

“Why? Because I’m a nuisance?!”

“Because I will get attached!” Hai growls, stunning Kaveh into silence. “For fuck’s sake, Kaveh, you’re human ! Staying here will change you irrevocably. And the more you stay here, the less you’d be able to return to your realm! I can’t let you take that risk!”

Kaveh lifts his chin. “And so what? Hai, so what?! I want to stay!”

“No, you don’t!”

“Ah, so the king can argue passionately with someone else after all. We’ve thought you were a soulless robot.”

Kaveh whips around but his vision is suddenly blocked by Hai’s body. “Wanderer. Leave.”

“You’re so loud, you’re disturbing the sirens. They came to let me know.” The fae called Wanderer sneers. “I don’t know what you’re doing, my king, but you shouldn’t be having your squabbles out of your home.”

Kaveh tries to look around Hai’s body and can only glimpse a small boy standing a few meters away.

But something else strikes him.

The boy calls Hai my king .

“Are you the king of the fae folks?” Kaveh takes a step back. Then another step. His heart thuds painfully beneath his ribs, a sense of betrayal flooding him. “Are you, Hai?”

Hai doesn’t turn around, his shoulders rigid. “Kaveh…”

“You’re the king, and you could have taken me back to my realm on your own.” Even his voice fails him. A lump chokes on his throat so violently that he almost wants to puke. “All this time, you could have taken me back, but you said I needed help from the court.”

Hai turns around slowly, his face shadowed. “Kaveh…”

“Why did you lie to me?”

Hai flinches. 

“This is the human you defended a couple of weeks ago, my king?” The voice gets closer and Kaveh sees the other fae–Wanderer. Under the brim of his large hat, Wanderer does look like an adolescent boy. He’s still sneering at Kaveh. “There’s nothing special with him.”

“Even if you’re the queen’s ward, I will not hesitate to kill you.”

Another painful jolt makes Kaveh want to cry. The queen . Hai already has a queen?

“Kaveh, please, listen to me.” If Kaveh doesn’t know better, he’d think Hai is desperate. But why would the fae king feel desperate when he’s only talking to a lowly human like him?

Kaveh has heard and read of the fae king–supposedly very old, and cruel. For a moment, Kaveh fears for his life, and Hai seems to be picking it up because he sighs and kneels on the grass. Kaveh ignores Wanderer’s shocked gasp and stares at Hai, whose eyes never leave Kaveh.

“I didn’t want to lie,” Hai starts. “But I wanted you around. So I hid the fact that I was a king because, for some reason, my curiosity won’t let me let you out of my sight.”

“Nahida is gonna have a field day with this,” Wanderer mutters. “My king, you should take him to the Sanctuary of Surasthana. Nahida can help him return.”

Kaveh takes another step back. “Who’s Nahida?”

“The queen,” Wanderer says bluntly. “I’m going to have to escort you up. The king can walk up on his own.”

Before Kaveh can register anything else, he’s being lifted up by a flying Wanderer, who’s ignoring Hai’s protests and Kaveh’s own wriggling. Wanderer zips up toward the tree effortlessly.

“Let me go!”

“If I do, you will fall into the lake and the sirens will eat you up!” Wanderer calls out loudly. “Be quiet. The king can teleport–he’ll be at the sanctuary before us.”

Kaveh is still processing that information–that Hai is the fae king, and that he was curious enough about him that he kept Kaveh around. For what exact reasons, Kaveh doesn’t know. Maybe it was the fae’s selfish desires. Maybe it was for an experiment.

True to Wanderer’s words, Hai is already waiting for them on top of the tree, in front of palace-like ornate doors. Suddenly, Wanderer lets go of his hold and Kaveh drops down with a loud shriek, but Hai is already leaping up to catch him mid-air. 

“Wanderer!” Hai shouts.

The ornate doors open to reveal a small girl, barefoot and wearing a green dress. She’s staring at Wanderer and says something in fae, which makes the boy pouts. He flies down behind her like he’s hiding from an angry Hai. Behind her, the white-haired man from two weeks before stands, cane at the ready. This time he’s not wearing a cloak but it doesn’t diminish his menacing aura.

Heart still in his throat, Kaveh just presses his forehead to Hai’s neck. In the middle of these powerful fae beings, he’s feeling pathetically mortal, and overwhelmed is an understatement for him.

“The human,” the childlike voice of the girl floats. “Oh, Alhaitham, is this him?”

Alhaitham .

Kaveh looks up. Is that Hai’s real name?

“You promised,” Hai says, his voice strangely rough. “You promised you’d send him back to his realm. You were the one sealing my powers, Nahida, you will be the one sending him back.”

Nahida says nothing, but her green eyes pierce into Kaveh’s soul.

“Do you wish to return, human?” Her voice is gentle and comforting. “You will remember nothing of this realm, of course, unless you manage to come back.”

"What?" Kaveh looks sharply at Hai, who is studiously avoiding Kaveh's eyes. "You never told me about that!"

"I didn't want you to overthink."

"That's gross," Wanderer says. "The king actually cares about the human."

"Wanderer," Nahida sighs. Wanderer dutifully flies up again and perches on the roof. "What say you, human?"

"My name is Kaveh," Kaveh mumbles, a bit irked that they keep calling him human. "And no, I am not going back."

Nahida tilts her head. "And why is that?"

Kaveh wriggles around and despite Hai's obvious reluctance, he manages to land on his feet and takes a few steps away so he could look at both Nahida and Hai.

"I don't know about Hai, but I'd like to stay. I don't want to leave just for me to forget about him, and I don't want to live my life wondering if I'm missing something." Because Kaveh is sure that leaving the Otherworld will leave a huge hole in his memories--and heart. "Even if Hai--Alhaitham--doesn't want me around him, I don't care. I have no one else. I have no family left." Kaveh fixes his gaze on Hai, his mind made up. "And I don't know why you decided to keep me, Hai, but the past three weeks were some of the happiest days I've ever known. Please don't take it away from me." I love you, Kaveh doesn't say. I'm falling in love with you. Don't make me leave.

"Kaveh..." Hai holds out a hand and suddenly drops to his knees.

"Hai!" Kaveh rushes to him, but Nahida steps in and shakes her head.

"He'll be fine," she reassures him. "Look!"

And right in front of his eyes, Hai shrinks.

The fur in his body recedes to reveal a fully human skin, tanned and taut over a muscled body. His feline face morphs into a completely human face. A handsome face, with a shocking hair of grey streaked with teal. His tail disappears, and his limbs change back into human hands and feet. He's curling up on the floor, panting, while his beastly form slowly turns back into its normal fae form.

And what a sight he is.

Hai opens his eyes--the shocking teal-sunset oh-so-familiar--and searches for Kaveh.

"Ka... veh..."

Ignoring Nahida, Kaveh sidesteps her and drops to his knees next to Hai, gathering him into his arms. Hai's skin is damp with sweat, his hair messy and matted, but when those eyes lock on Kaveh, it feels like he's finally finding what he's been dreaming of.

"My name is Alhaitham," Hai--Alhaitham--whispers, right in Kaveh's ear. Something snaps into place in him and Kaveh shudders in relief. A name wields power. And Alhaitham gives his to him. A human.

"Hello, my name is Kaveh."

The kiss is everything that Kaveh has ever wanted, and as he returns Alhaitham's deep kisses with his own desperate ones, Kaveh thinks that he's so lucky.

They stay in the Sanctuary of Surasthana for another three days.

During their stay, Nahida explains a few things to him. Nahida's sister, the late queen Rukkhadevata, died and left the throne to Nahida. Since Nahida was so young in fae age, they appointed a regent--Alhaitham, who was the court's scribe--to help her with the general affairs in the court, while Nahida herself learn about how to run a court. Just after the court settles into a tentative peace, some of the fae citizens criticize on how their king is too blunt and cold, unfit to become a ruler. He always rejected courtship requests and would say things too honestly with little regard to other people's feelings. It even came to the point of the noble fae protesting and sending formal complaints, which Alhaitham dismissed. Nahida got tired of it so she cursed Alhaitham, and cast Alhaitham into the forest. When Alhaitham learns how to feel genuine emotions and affection for someone would the curse break.

Two weeks ago, when Nahida found out Alhaitham was sheltering a human, she understandably got worried, but Alhaitham convinced her to let Kaveh stay, but not before having Wanderer challenge him for defying the queen.

Kaveh doesn't stop teasing him about it--and how glorious it is, to have someone who wants him to stay.

On the fourth day, they decided to return to the cottage. And Alhaitham hands in his official resignation as the king.

"I didn't want to be a king," he states plainly when Nahida pouts at him. "I just wanted a peaceful life. And being a king will not provide me that."

"I will let you come home, but you'll still be my advisor and king in title," Nahida says. "Come on, you'll still be paid enough. Wouldn't you want to provide for Kaveh now?"

Alhaitham sighs. Kaveh can only laugh at him from his place near the door.

The ride back to their cottage is silent, but this time, comfortable. Kaveh knows there are a lot of things they need to talk about--regarding their lives and future, but for a moment, he doesn't want to overthink things. Alhaitham keeps him close all the time, arms never leaving Kaveh's body. The cottage is still clean when they return and the fireplace is blazing, creating a comfortable warmth around the cottage.

"Did someone enter the cottage when we were gone?" Kaveh drops the luggage of art supplies and fabrics from the Sanctuary on the floor. Nahida insisted that he accept them, and Kaveh found that he couldn't refuse the queen when she made such puppy eyes.

"Yes. The pixies come when I'm not around."

Alhaitham throws his body on the divan and drags Kaveh with him. Kaveh nuzzles against his cheek, content and happy.

"I think I'd rather love calling you Hai," Kaveh whispers slowly, enjoying the feeling of a warm body beneath him.

"Whatever you desire, Kaveh," Alhaitham whispers back. "A ghrá. Thank you. For choosing to stay." For choosing me, is unsaid, but from the way Alhaitham's arms tighten, Kaveh kinda gets it.

"Thank you for letting me."

When sleep pulls him, in the arms of a fae king, Kaveh has never felt safer.