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Jungwoo silently opened his eyes, a fluffy feeling stuffing his brain as he curled into the warm presence next to him. He groaned as he squeezed his eyes tighter, not wanting to move from his position at all. Arms wrapped around his slender figure as the presence next to him slightly groaned as well. He smiled silently, snuggling into the other boy’s warming presence as he drifted back off to sleep slowly.
When Jungwoo awoke once more, the warm presence he had slept with was gone. He groaned loudly, stretching in his bed as his joints cracked. He stood up from the bed as he rubbed his eyes silently, walking towards the entrance of the room and exiting it without much fanfare.
He soon entered their kitchen, grabbing his usual coffee mug from their cabinet and turning on their coffee machine.
“Good morning,” Jaehyun smiled from their kitchen table, one hand holding his coffee mug and the other holding his phone.
“Good morning, Jaehyun-hyung,” Jungwoo said in his morning voice, deeper than usual.
Once Jungwoo’s coffee was ready, he sat down at their kitchen table, closing his eyes as he took in the alluring aroma. He smiled, bringing the mug up to his lips and drinking it silently.
“Have the others already gone?” Jungwoo questioned his hyung now that he was a little more awake, caffeine immediately kicking into his body.
“Mm. It’s just us for a while. Did you make any plans for today?” Jaehyun questioned back, tilting his head as he set his phone down.
“Mm-mh. I was just planning on taking a rest day.” Jungwoo smiled as he spoke, gazing into his coffee mug.
“That’s good. I know you haven’t been getting much sleep lately.” Jaehyun’s smile lessened ever so slightly, picking up his coffee mug as he finished.
“Mm. At least I haven’t been having nightmares lately.” Jungwoo smiled, truthfully relieved.
“Mm.” Jaehyun hummed once again, a somewhat somber expression on his face.
Jungwoo stood silent for a minute. Before drinking the rest of the coffee.
“I’m gonna watch a movie in our room. Wanna come?”
He put his mug in their sink and tilted his head back to Jaehyun.
“No, I think I’ll watch some TV.”
“Okay, hyung.”
Jungwoo smiled before waving goodbye to his Jaehyun-hyung, the older one instantly waving back with a smile on his face.
He watched the boy go into their shared room, smile still on his face. He’d been sleeping with some of the other members this week, so Jaehyun hadn’t seen much of him outside of their schedules this week. Today was their ever-coveted day off, most of the others had decided to go out so there was hardly anyone in their dorm now. He reminisced on their memories together silently as he drank his coffee.
2019
Jungwoo was having a hard time. It was as obvious as white on a polar bear. The unsolicited words from their ‘fans’ dug into Jungwoo’s ego like nothing ever did before. They really didn’t know how to help, but they tried their best.
Eventually, the topic of therapy was brought up to Jungwoo. He decided to give it a try. What could go wrong?
Therapy was actually…great. Jungwoo was actually learning techniques that could help his anxiety disorder while also healing from the trauma everything gave him all at once.
Things looked up for Jungwoo from there. He actually started to become playful with the other boys during their schedules and having fun.
They were all so proud of the progress Jungwoo had made with only a few months of therapy. He thought of how Jungwoo so quickly found his place in their group, making them all secretly fond of his versatility.
Jungwoo was such a light to all of them. Even though his addition to their group was so quick, they all cherished the boy as soon as they saw him. He was sweet like candy, each boy felt the depths of his warmth and his love. If someone was ever having a tough time during practice, he wouldn’t hesitate to help them and show them certain moves step-by-step. He was so genuinely nice to all of them behind the cameras and bravado of the idol life, it made them all want to be better humans than they already were.
Jaehyun still remembers the first time he grasped the true power of Jungwoo’s kindness.
2019
Haechan was having a tough time as he was in between his schedules for Dream and 127 again. As such, it was to be expected that his immune system was in a more weakened state than usual.
No one seemed to notice how Haechan fell sick, they were all too busy with their own physical and mental preparations for the comeback. That is, everyone except Jungwoo.
Sure, Jungwoo had still been considered a ‘new member’ of 127; and on top of that, he had really just made the first couple of steps forward with his anxiety disorder and depression. But, he wanted to give the others the strength they needed through their schedules.
So, he silently watched Haechan throughout their schedules to make sure his condition wasn’t worsening. They were already halfway through their day, and Haechan was somehow still standing on his two feet. Even if it looked like he would collapse any second.
It all came to a head when they were in rehearsal for their new album showcase next week. Jungwoo silently looked at the boy in worry when he messed up his lines; it seemed like the atmosphere of the room was already intense and his mistakes only made everyone tenser.
When they took a break, Jungwoo immediately walked up to Haechan, the boy chugging his water bottle silently.
“Are you okay, Haechanie? You look really pale?”
He looked at the boy worriedly, the usual darker hue of his skin nowhere to be seen.
“I’m fine, hyung…” He slightly whispered, breathing heavily.
Jungwoo slightly huffed, lips jutting out in a pout.
“You don’t look fine. Come here, let me feel––”
Jungwoo interrupted himself as he felt Haechan’s forehead, gasping as his eyes widened.
“You’re burning up! Come on, we’re going home right now. ”
He started to lead the youngest of their group towards the door of their practice room, a determined expression on his face.
“I––I can’t––hyung––” He softly speaks, looking at him with a somewhat worried expression. He shouldn’t get special treatment just because he felt like literal shit .
“No buts, we're going home.”
He led the maknae back to the door of the practice room, a determined expression still on his face.
Once they all arrived back home, he sent the boy back to his room before going to their bathroom and grabbing medicine and water from their bathroom and refrigerator before going back into Haechan’s room. Jaehyun briefly heard Jungwoo talk to Haechan from outside the door.
“It’s okay, my sister used to get sick a lot so I learned how to take care of her from an early age.” Jungwoo spoke in a comforting tone, one that Jaehyun hadn’t heard before.
“I’m sorry, hyung. I feel like…I could’ve helped you more through that time.”
Silence.
“It’s okay. I knew it was new for everyone. We didn’t know how to deal with each other yet. Plus, you were busy with Dream stuff back then too. I don’t blame any of you for what happened.”
Jaehyun’s eyes widened, before he hesitatingly walked back to his room.
Jaehyun regretted how he couldn’t do anything to help Jungwoo when he was having a rough time. He always wished to help the boy, even if he had no idea how to; but that day, when he heard Jungwoo talking with Haechan, it made him think. Maybe it was about time to forgive himself for not knowing how to help Jungwoo while he was struggling. It was only hindering his relationship with Jungwoo at that point in their careers, and he was a little tired of feeling guilty if he was being honest.
It wasn’t long until Jungwoo’s kindness was evident to the others as well. Jungwoo was as necessary to them as the others were to each other.
Jungwoo was special to Jaehyun in particular. All of his group members were of course, but Jungwoo was a different breed of special in Jaehyun’s eyes. He was the first person to tell Jaehyun up front that he didn’t expect anything from him.
2019
Jaehyun was having a rough time with his mental preparations for their comeback this time. He didn’t know why, but the name ‘Jaehyun’ seemed to weigh on him heavier and heavier. His legacy as the ‘perfect’ idol of his group seemed to grow as a weight on his shoulders. And now, with the newest addition to their group, another person to ‘mentor’ in the ways of being an idol. He wasn’t sure if he was completely up to the task.
Jaehyun fell into a deeper and deeper hole until the others finally intervened. They addressed how it seemed like he was less than himself most days in their preparations. Jaehyun saw how Jungwoo looked at him with a worried expression the whole time.
Then, the simplest words are spoken by Jungwoo.
“Hyung…you know I don’t expect you to be perfect all the time, right?”
It was such a simple question, yet posed such an impact on his psyche. Jeong Yoonoh. Jeong Jaehyun. Maybe neither of them was ever perfect. And maybe that’s okay.
“Yeah, same with all of us. You don’t have to be perfect with us, Jaehyun-ah.”
Taeyong, who was kneeling down next to Jaehyun on the couch, spoke with glistening eyes.
Jaehyun looked at him silently before nodding.
“Okay.”
He whispered and smiled, closing his eyes.
Jaehyun remembers that day clearer than anything. Jungwoo simply allowed him to be him. Not the perfect Jaehyun everyone expects. Just the simple Jeong Yoonoh.
🤍
The next ones to return home were Haechan and Mark. They both went out shopping for some new clothes since it was one of their shared hobbies. They both came back with multiple bags in hand, hearts fully settled.
Jungwoo had finished his movie somewhat long ago, so now he was stretched out on the couch watching TV and Jaehyun was on the chair next to their couch.
Once Haechan put his bags on his bed in his room, he casually went to their kitchen to get a snack and spend time with his other members. He opened a bag of chips from their cabinet and went to sit on their couch, Jungwoo lifting his legs silently as he continued to watch TV.
As Haechan ate and watched TV with Jungwoo, he intermittently looked at the older boy, his eyes silently closing every few minutes. He smiled when the older boy fully fell asleep, creases of his face forming in joy.
Haechan really loved his Jungwoo-hyung.
The Jungwoo-hyung who took care of him when he was sick.
The Jungwoo-hyung who was the only person that could beat Haechan in terms of humor.
The Jungwoo-hyung who loved the members of their group so much.
Haechan still remembers when they had their first proper conversation after Jungwoo joined.
2019
Haechan decided to finally talk to Jungwoo, now that he finally got the older in his room. Even if the former was sick.
“I’m sorry, hyung.” He whispered, in between the haze of his fever and his current situation, he didn’t even know if he was hallucinating this whole interaction or not.
“It’s okay, my sister used to get sick a lot so I learned how to take care of her from an early age.” Jungwoo easily comforted the younger boy, an unexpected side of him showing as he easily took care of him.
Haechan stayed silent for a moment, deciding if he should just leave it there or clarify that he meant he wished he helped him more when he was struggling. Haechan slightly smiled, still laying down in his bed.
“I’m sorry, hyung. I feel like…I could’ve helped you more through that time.”
Haechan immediately looks at Jungwoo when he falls silent, with a somewhat nervous expression on his face. Jungwoo looks down thoughtfully, before slightly smiling.
“It’s okay. I knew it was new for everyone. We didn’t know how to deal with each other yet. Plus, you were busy with Dream stuff back then too. I don’t blame any of you for what happened.”
Haechan looks down thoughtfully, a neutral expression on his face. His eyes locked onto Jungwoo’s hand on his blanket, his own hand hesitating to reach out and grab it. He eventually did, red of his cheeks becoming redder and the maknae looking down embarrassingly.
“I know how hard it could be though. Especially because I debuted at such a young age. It…it can be a tough transition for anyone. Especially after training. I wish…I could’ve prepared you. Through whatever it took.”
“Mm. Well…if it makes you feel any better, part of it is my fault. I felt like…I didn’t want any help. I wanted to show everyone I could deal with something myself.”
They both stood silently for a minute.
“Mm. I get that. I’m…glad we got to talk about this, hyung.”
“Me too, Haechanie. Get some sleep while you can.”
He rubbed the boy’s hand softly as he silently smiled, getting up from his position on the ground and patting the boy’s hair softly. Haechan smiled silently, waving to the boy.
Haechan loved his Jungwoo-hyung; even if it was more silent than his love for the other members. The other members loved Jungwoo just as much too; and they all showed it however they wanted to. He thought about all the things Jungwoo did, whether he wanted them to realize or not, to encourage them and support them as best as he could.
He remembered when he first brought up his idea of going to Taeyong’s shooting place for Shalala to encourage him through the shooting and to give him a little ‘pick-me-up’. He didn’t even have to do that, he just wanted to. Haechan couldn’t really wrap his mind around it.
He remembers when Yuta injured himself during a late-night practice and came back to the dorm and Jungwoo found out and went to the pharmacy and picked up bandages and ointment to help. Who goes out at two am to do something like that? Kim Jungwoo apparently.
He remembers how even through all of the online bullying and hate he still tried his hardest to show fans he does belong in this group and always told them to take care of themselves and eat well through all of the death threats he received.
He remembers how Jungwoo always provided his shoulder to cry on when the other members needed it. Even Taeyong didn’t want to do something like that most of the time.
How he always silently took care of his members behind the scenes once he was certain the cameras were off so he wouldn’t take any credit for being nice or like he was putting on an act.
Haechan was sure all of the other members loved Jungwoo just as much as he did; and if not, probably a lot more. Jungwoo was one of the kindest souls to ever walk this earth and Haechan would carry that agenda with him until the day when they were gone from this world.
Fin