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David sat in the cafeteria, staring at his food. It doesn’t look like food. Not that it’s bad! The opposite, actually. David just sometimes has so little of an appetite that food doesn’t look like food. But everyone has days like that… right?
He was pulled away from it by a group of people sitting with him. Xander, Min, Teruko, Whit, Charles, Rose, and Nico. Great. The seven of them tended to be loud when together. Except for Rose and Nico, David wasn’t sure why those two hung around the loud group so much.
“Mister David?” Xander asked as softly as he could. “Are you feeling alright? You’ve hardly eaten anything.”
David looked straight at him, trying to hide the empty feeling bubbling inside of him. He smiled warmly. “Yeah, I’m fine! I’m just not that hungry.”
If Xander suspected anything about the response, he didn’t show it. They nodded and went back to talking to Min.
Whit stared at David, almost like he was considering something. “You don’t have to eat if you’re not hungry, dude. Don’t like, force yourself.”
But it’d be rude to not eat it since someone spent time making it. David brushed off the rebutting thought and shrugged at Whit. “I don’t like wasting food.”
“If you don’t want it, I’ll eat it.” Teruko said nonchalantly, eating her own meal. “Whit’s right, you’ll make yourself sick if you eat when you’re not hungry.”
David’s face burned red-hot, and his head dropped so he was staring at his thighs. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. For the love of God, David, don’t cry .
When his eyes started to water, David stood up and obscured his face from view. “You’re right. You’re both right. I’m just going to… go to my room. I’m pretty tired.”
And with that, he left.
//
Whit watched David leave, still pretty lost in thought. After the speaker was gone, he turned his attention to Xander.
“Yo, Xander!”
“Yeah, Whit?”
“You’re like, a big fan of David’s right?”
“I- Yes..?”
Whit scooted his chair away from Charles and over to Xander. “Has he always been this… I don’t even know what to call it. You saw him. Is he always like that?”
Xander thought for a while. “Well, no. But a stage persona isn’t a good example of how a person behaves from day to day.”
“Well, I know that. But he’s never been that.. despondent? In his whole time here.” Whit said, his hands drumming on the table. “I don’t know, my intuition is telling me something’s wrong.”
“W- we could check on him.” Nico offered, wrapping a strand of their black hair around their finger and fidgeting with it. “I- I mean! If that’s w- what you guys want to do.”
“I’m afraid that might be the only thing for it.” Charles stated, standing up. “Clearly, something is the matter with him.”
“I’ll stay with Rose.” Min said, gesturing to the sleeping brunette. Min took off her cardigan and placed it on Rose’s back. “You five go, but don’t make a ruckus and upset him more. He could just dislike loud noises and spaces.”
Whit nodded and got up to leave, his friends in tow. He got to David’s door and knocked on it. “Yo, David? You in there?”
No response, but Whit could definitely hear something coming from inside. “Starboy, it’s Whit. Are you alright?”
After a long pause, David answered. “I’m okay. Please leave me alone.” His voice was weak, like he’d been crying. No, sobbing.
“Is your door locked?”
“…No.”
“Then we’re coming in.”
“Wait—!”
Whit opened the door and found David curled up in his blanket, still dressed in his clothes instead of pyjamas. The room was a mess. There were dirty clothes and dishes everywhere.
“Please… go away.” David stifled a sob as Whit sat down beside him on the bed. He gestured for everyone else not to follow just yet.
“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked, his funny tone suddenly replaced with something more sincere.
David shook his head, and Whit finally got a good look at his face. Tears had ruined the makeup on his face, leaving black trails down his cheeks.
Wordlessly, Whit got up and started tidying up David’s room. David stared at him, equally as silent. Whit regarded him with a tender smile. “Some things are hard to talk about, I get it. Don’t worry, I won’t force you.”
David saw everyone else standing outside his door and buried his head in his blanket, embarrassed. Whit looked over at the group and gestured for them to leave. One by one, they left. Charles closed the door behind him.
“There.” Whit said, “They’re all gone, David.”
David completely uncovered his head, and his hair was a mess. The clips that were carefully holding it in place had fallen out. “…How did you know?”
“I don’t know.” Whit said, continuing to tidy up. “I just sort of had a gut feeling that there was something wrong, and normally my intuition is right, so..”
David watched him tidy, confused. Whit paused and smiled. “Sorry, I know I didn’t ask if you wanted help. I just thought you could use it.”
“…You’re not mad?”
“Why would I be mad?”
“My room’s in a state and we’ve been here for what, a week? Less?”
Whit laughed. “You thought I’d get mad at you for that? At most, I’m upset you didn’t ask for help sooner.”
“I didn’t even ask at all…” David mumbled, hugging his knees. “You’re being weirdly nice. I thought you’d make fun of me or something.”
Whit stopped tidying. He set everything he was holding down and sat on David’s bed. “I know I make a bad joke or two sometimes, but I’d never make fun of you for something like this.”
Instead of speaking, David started to cry again. He tried to rub his eyes to get it to stop but Whit pulled his hands away. “You’ll rub your makeup into them.”
David’s tears didn’t stop, no matter how much he wanted them to. Whit pulled him in for a hug and patted the back of his head as he sobbed. “There, there. It’s alright.”
Eventually, he couldn’t cry anymore and pulled away. Whit smiled at him, taking his tear-soaked jacket off and hanging it up on David’s door. “Feel any better?”
David shook his head and looked down at the ground. “…No. Not really.”
Whit smiled. “That’s okay.”
When the room was tidy, Whit returned to sitting on the end of David’s bed. He lifted one of the speaker’s hands and held it. “Are you sure you’re not hungry? I could cook you something.”
David hesitated. “…Yeah. I’m hungry.”
“What do you want to eat?” Whit asked, standing up again and walking over to David’s door.
“…Oatmeal.” David muttered. “Or.. whatever you want to make.”
“Oatmeal, got it. You want anything with it like fruit or sugar?”
“…Blueberries?”
Whit nodded and opened the door to leave. “I’ll be back in a minute, David.”
“…Okay. Thank you.”
Whit walked back to the cafeteria and saw the rest of his friends sitting together. Xander perked up seeing the matchmaker and waved. “Is Mister David alright?”
“Yeah, he’s fine.” Whit said. David’s mental health was something for him to discuss when he was ready. “I’m making him something to eat, since he is actually pretty hungry.”
“Didn’t he say he wasn’t hungry?” Min asked. “Wasn’t you and Teruko pressing him over it why he got upset?”
“…No.” Whit shook his head. “That’s not why he was upset.”
Whit opened the door to the kitchen. “Also, when he comes back out, don’t say anything.”
“What’s w- wrong with him?” Nico asked. Whit sighed, leaning against the doorframe. “Can’t say. Too personal.”
“His room was pretty messy.” Charles noted, scribbling in his notepad. “Is that it?”
“That’s… connected to it.” Whit said. “Stop asking. All of you. And Charlie, stop writing about your classmates, ya weirdo.”
And with his final sentence, he quietly laughed and went into the kitchen.
He grabbed a box of readymade oatmeal and a tub of blueberries. Humming, Whit turned on the stove and poured some of the oatmeal into a pot. “How much should I make? Hm..”
Whit weighed out his options. “David’s an average-sized guy. Healthy weight, average height.”
He checked the box. “How much is a normal serving?”
He found the serving sizes and made a normal-sized one. After he finished heating it up, he poured it into a bowl and dropped a few blueberries on top.
Something was missing. “I wonder…”
Whit checked the fridge and looked for something to add to it. He found some honey and grabbed it. He drizzled some of it over the oatmeal and grabbed a spoon, gently setting it in the bowl.
“There. Perfect.”
Whit lifted the bowl and left the kitchen, carrying it to David’s room.
He knocked on the bedroom door with his free hand. “David, I’m back.”
He opened the door and found David sitting up in his bed, his blanket tossed aside. “Feeling any better?”
The speaker shook his head. Whit handed him the bowl and he looked down at it. Whit watched him, worried. “Is there something wrong with it? I can make you something else if you want.”
“N- no! It’s not that, it’s just I- …I don’t like people watching me eat.” David confessed, his face burning. Whit smiled and covered his eyes. “There, now you can eat since I can’t see you.”
David laughed at Whit’s antics. Whit smiled at his laughter.
While Whit’s eyes were covered, David ate his food quietly. When he was done, Whit uncovered his eyes and took the bowl from him.
“I’m sorry.” David said, looking away from Whit. Whit lifted his hand and gently turned his head. “Why? You didn’t do anything.”
“I feel like I’m a burden to you.” The speaker continued. “Because you had to tidy up and make me food..”
Whit pulled David in for a hug. “You’re not a burden. Or a bother. I helped you because you needed help.”
David sniffled and started to cry again. He wrapped his arms around Whit and buried his head on his shoulder.
//
God. How fucking weak was he? Crying on the shoulder of someone he barely knew.
No matter how hard he tried, though, he couldn’t pull himself from Whit’s embrace. Was Whit stronger than him, or did David just not want to let go?
There was something comforting about how Whit held him. It was gentle in a way David didn’t know the usually unserious matchmaker could be. Loving, even.
Ha. As if anyone loved David.
When they finally let go, David looked at the floor. “I think—I think I’m ready to talk about it.”
“Then I’m ready to listen, Starboy.” Whit said, crossing his legs as he sat.
“…I’m—” David started, temporarily choking on his words in his hesitance. “I’m.. chronically depressed.”
“Well, that much was kind of obvious.” Whit commented without thinking, before lightly hitting himself for saying that. David laughed, but in a sort of sad way. “Yeah, I know. I just needed to say it.”
“Sometimes it gets really bad and I refuse to eat… like today. Not because I want to starve or anything, but…”
Whit nodded patiently. David knew he wasn’t used to playing therapist for others, and he was probably bothering him. But still, he spoke. Speaking was the only thing he was good at, after all.
“I don’t know how to explain it. It’s like my brain doesn’t recognise any food I’m offered as food, even if I’m really hungry, and refuses it.” He said, glancing up from the floor to see Whit’s expression. Whit took David’s hand in his comfortingly.
David blushed before mentally biting back his giddiness. Whit was so nice to him, even though he’s stupid and ugly and boring and mean and… He looked at the blonde’s tender smile and any thought he had about himself dissipated.
“Don’t worry, I get it.” Whit said. “I understand what you mean.”
David didn’t speak for a while, but subconsciously tightened his grip on Whit’s hand. He interlocked their fingers and Whit didn’t stop him.
“…What did they all say when you went out to cook?” David asked hesitantly. Whit smiled and brushed David’s hair out of his face with his free hand. “Nothing bad. Most comments were a little poorly timed, but they all meant well. They asked a lot of questions, but I didn’t answer any.”
“…Thank you.” David looked down at his hand, his knuckles turning white from his grip on Whit’s hand. He suddenly let go and pulled his hand close to his chest.
“Am I hurting you?” He asked, regret seeping into his voice. Why did he do that? Now Whit’s going to hate him like the useless piece of shit that he is.
But…
Whit took David’s hand back into his own, matching the interlocked fingers exactly as they were before. He grinned, setting his other hand on top. “Nope. Not at all.”
Then David hugged him. He wasn’t crying, but he just wanted to feel Whit’s arms around him again. Whit obliged without David even needing to ask, wrapping his arms around the bluenette.
David was always hollow. Not complete. A broken doll. But Whit being there made the hole close up, if even just by a little bit.
All that did was make David need him more.
//
Whit held David, his hand gently tangled in his blue hair. When he started to pull away, he looked into David’s eyes and saw their golden glitter starting to return.
He eventually let go of every part of the speaker. Except his hand.
Whit stood up and David followed. He walked into the bathroom and started drawing the bluenette a bath. David watched him, never even lightly surrendering his grip on Whit’s hand.
“David?” Whit asked, turning the tap off once the bath was full. David looked up at him and tilted his head. “Yeah..?”
“This will sound weird.”
“Oh dear.”
“Can you take your clothes off so I can help you have a bath?”
David burst out laughing. He fell forwards and caught himself with his free hand just before he hit the ground. “Whit—pfft!—there were a thousand ways you could’ve—ha.. haha!—asked that!”
Whit laughed as well, but not nearly as hard as David. Still, he was glad to see the speaker in higher spirits. “It’s not that funny—!”
David didn’t answer. He was too busy laughing himself to death at Whit’s unfortunate word choice.
To distract him from the silly question, Whit ended up doing something even sillier.
He kissed him. He pulled him gently off of the ground and pressed his lips against David’s. He took the speaker’s free hand into his own, pulling him closer without breaking their gentle kiss.
When David pulled away, he stared at Whit in disbelief. Whit’s face flushed and his gaze dropped to the ground. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I did that.”
“Don’t apologise.” David said, smiling but trying to cover his face to hide it. “You didn’t do anything. That’s what you’d say if it was me, right?”
“…Yeah.” Whit admitted. His face was dusted bright pink, almost matching his outfit. “I was like, trying to calm you down.”
“Well, it worked.” David gently elbowed him. “I don’t even feel as sad as I was before now.”
David brushed a tear from his eye, left over from his laughing fit. “Also, yes.”
“What?”
“Your… mildly inappropriately worded question. The answer is yes.”
“Oh.. oh! Right, I totally forgot.”
David let go of Whit’s hand and started to undo his tie. He pulled it off and worked away at his shirt buttons before glancing up and noticing Whit looking at him.
He whipped the blonde with his tie. “Don’t watch!”
“Sorry!” Whit said, holding up his hands in an apologetic gesture. He spun around and sat facing the wall while David got undressed and into the bath.
“…You can turn around now.” David called over to him. Whit turned around again and found David sitting in the water, his head rested on his knees.
Whit stood up and walked over to the bath, kneeling next to it. “Don’t soak my clothes, dude.”
“…Did you just call the person you just kissed ‘dude’?”
“Yes.”
David rolled his eyes and pretended to gag. Whit teasingly punched him before grabbing a shampoo bottle and squirting out a bit onto his hand. “How do you normally wash your hair?”
“Shampoo, conditioner.”
“Got it.”
Whit started to scrub David’s hair, careful not to hurt him or accidentally pull on his blue locks. David didn’t speak, not wanting to distract the matchmaker and end up with soap in his eyes.
Whit pulled his hands away and wiped them with a towel. “I trust you can wash your own body?”
“Obviously.” David said, leaning back in the water. Whit soaped up a bath sponge and handed him it. “Wait until I wash the shampoo out of your hair.”
David did as he was told, sitting patiently in the bath while Whit soaked his hair. Whit tapped his shoulder when he was done. “I’ll be back, I’m setting out clean clothes for you.”
“Thank you.” David smiled and watched Whit leave. The matchmaker quietly closed the door behind him.
Whit walked back into David’s bedroom and looked through his closet for a clean outfit. He pulled one out and set the hanger on his door handle.
Whit made the speaker’s bed before grabbing the clothes and folding them, setting them on his blanket. He found David’s star clips lying on the floor and set them on top of his bow tie.
He poked his head around the bathroom door when he was done to check on David. The speaker smiled and waved. “I’m done.”
Whit nodded and returned to kneeling at his side. He scrubbed conditioner into David’s hair with the same carefulness as before. “Your hair is so beautiful, I’m jealous.”
“Thank… you?” David blushed, but couldn’t cover his face because of Whit’s hands in his hair. “I like your hair. Blonde suits you.”
“I’m actually not a natural blonde.”
“I can tell, your roots are growing out.”
“Wha—?!”
“Just kidding, they look fine.”
Whit whacked David’s head. “Not funny. My natural roots look awful with my hair colour.”
“What colour is your hair naturally, anyway?”
“Black, like my dad.”
“Why’d you dye it blonde?”
“My mom’s hair is blonde.”
David nodded before wincing, as Whit’s hands were still tangled in his hair. “Ow, fuck !”
The speaker gasped and covered his mouth, suddenly aware of his expression of pain. “I’m sorry, I— I didn’t mean to say that—”
“Oops.” Whit teased, leaning closer to the back of David’s head. “For a grown adult, you’re pretty self-conscious about how you talk.”
“I have…” David sighed, relaxing into Whit’s grip on his head. “I have an image to maintain. All of that ‘holier than thou’ stuff.”
“It’s not the end of the world if you swear, though.” Whit laughed, finally letting go of David’s hair. “Sure, I don’t do it… often, but there’s nothing wrong with it, Starboy.”
David leaned against the edge of the bath and propped his arms against it. “I know…”
Whit rinsed the conditioner out of David’s hair and helped him stand and get out of the bath. David wrapped a towel around himself and shuddered at the cold air.
“Jesus, it’s cold in here.” He muttered, wrapping his arms around himself. Whit shook his head, “You’re just not used to the cold because of the hot water.”
David rolled his eyes and went into his bedroom to get dressed. Whit waited patiently in the bathroom until David called him out.
The bluenette was sat on his bed. He wasn’t smiling, but he didn’t look particularly sad either. His hair was still unclipped, but it had been dried and brushed.
Whit smiled at him, knowing his job was done. David was happy, even if it wouldn’t last forever.
//
David looked at Whit, soaked in soapy water from helping him wash his hair. Whit didn’t seem to notice, despite his prior warning not to get him wet.
Even though he tried to hide it, David was still giddy from Whit kissing him. Sure, it probably didn’t mean anything to Whit, but it did to David.
He stood up and faced Whit, getting close enough that he has to look down to see him. David took the matchmaker’s hand into his own once more, still tightly holding on like he had before.
The speaker swallowed his pride, not that he had any to begin with, and decided to kiss him again. Whit was surprised, clearly, but eventually kissed him back. They stayed together until their lungs burned from a lack of air, when Whit pulled back.
“David, you..” Whit said upon pulling away. “You’re a really good kisser, ya know?”
David laughed hearing Whit’s familiar humorous tone return to his voice and kissed his nose. Whit laughed at the kiss.
“I… I think I’m in love with you.” David admitted in a whisper, his free hand cupping the blonde’s cheek. “You made today hurt less. Thank you.”
Whit smiled and kissed his cheek. “I’m glad I could help you. If you have a bad day like that again, let me know, kay?”
“Yeah. I will.”