Work Text:
One: 17
Dazai was bored out of his mind. The people they were supposed to take care of were bad and boring and too easy. He would complain to Mori later, until he gave them better missions with less grunts and more fun people. Mori would probably complain in turn about having to find other people to do Soukokus job. But that wasn’t Dazais' issue and he definitely didn’t care.
He watched absentmindedly as Chuuya kicked someone in the head then flew to another person and axe kicked them into the ground.
“At least do something you lazy piece of shit!” Chuuya yelled as he jumped at another guy and kicked away his gun.
“Don’t wanna!” He yelled back. He pocketed his hands and followed the other with his eyes. It's not like he needed help, and Dazai would prefer to drown himself in that fountain instead of helping. Actually he’d prefer to drown himself more than probably anything else he could be doing.
“If you don’t-”
Dazai watched in wonder as Chuuya went to jump over the fountain, slipped, and fell straight into the water. Dazai shot the only grunt left standing before walking up to the redhead. His phone was out to snap a picture in an instant.
“You look like a drowned rat”
Chuuya was sitting up supported by his hands behind him, his clothes were soaked and his hair was sticking to his face. His eyes were perfectly pissed as they glared at Dazai.
“You better delete that right this second!”
Dazai grinned, “I don't think I will.” He jumped back when Chuuya went to grab him, still staring at the photo. This was great blackmail. Or maybe just a way to embarrass his partner.
“You-” Chuuya kept yelling after that, every single insult under the sun.
Dazai danced away as Chuuya tried to grab him. He made quick work of sending the photo to Chuuya, and when deciding that wasn’t enough, also sent it to Kouyou and Hirotsu. He was laughing the whole time.
Later that week Chuuya sent him a picture of Dazai hanging upside down out of a tree. He was tangled up in a rope and unfortunately stuck. Dazai glared at the picture for a few minutes with hundreds of plans for revenge running through his mind. This meant war.
~||~
“Chuuya!” He called and waited for said boy to turn around. As soon as he did Dazai snapped a picture and grinned widely.
“I will break your neck!” Chuuya seethed but he didn’t move. He was dressed up a little, and Kouyou was making his hair. Which meant it was sticking up every which way with little strings as she styled it. He looked ridiculous.
Dazai sent him the picture and Chuuya grumbled as he looked at it.
“Just wait mackerel” He grumbled “I already have a plan for revenge!”
Dazai snorted, an ugly sound “I’ll believe it when I see it. Chuuya is the most stupid person in the port mafia, he couldn’t plan and execute a plan to make cereal in the morning”
“You-” Kouyou put a hand on his shoulder to keep him still before he got up. “Just wait, you dead-eyed stinking fish!” Chuuya glared at him “When Kouyou-anesan is done I’m gonna slice up you stomach and paint my new bike with your innards”
Dazai nodded appreciatively “Graphic”
Chuuya threw a needle at him but Dazai tilted his head away before it pierced his uncovered eye.
A few days later Chuuya sent him a picture where Dazai was pathetically throwing up after drinking too much. There were tears in his eyes and his cheeks were flushed. He looked so far from the dead-eyes monster he showed others, it almost made him feel sick. He hadn’t even remembered Chuuya being there that night.
Dazai would have to step it up a notch.
~||~
The old people started getting annoyed with them. Which was unfair because they always argued and they had even stopped sending them the pictures long ago.
Mori had told him: “This ‘competition’ is risking you getting distracted during missions”
During their next mission Dazai had taken a hundred pictures exactly, they showed Chuuya and sometimes himself as they flawlessly got rid of the group of ability users. It wasn’t even difficult. After the mission he sent all hundred pictures to Mori. He never complained again after that.
“Oh my god you did what!?” Chuuya exclaimed, but then he was laughing “Shows that old man”
Dazai was always confused when Chuuya didn’t immediately defend Mori. Over the years it happened less and less.
Chuuya was laughing and Dazai automatically took his phone out and snapped a picture. Chuuya didn’t even notice as his eyes were creased and he was holding onto his stomach.
“I was wondering why you were acting so weird during that fight” He snorted and laughed a bit louder.
“I don’t know what he expected” Dazai smiled slightly “His face went through all five stages of grief in under a minute”
“You were there when you sent them?”
“Of course, I wanted to see it”
Chuuya snorted again “idiot”
“Says you”
He never sent the last picture to Chuuya, and their games stopped after that.
That night he held his phone over his head with a picture of his partner lighting up the room. Seeing his laughing face like this felt like taking one of Chuuyas kicks to the stomach. It made his breath hitch and his heart race. He wanted to touch that smile and it was absolutely ridiculous that he was having feelings over the other. But in the silence of his own room he thought it was alright, in the morning he would go back to pretending to hate him.
Two: 18
Dazai made a stupid decision. It wasn’t stupid per se, the plan worked out as always. But the decision was based on his feelings and that was the absolute worst thing he could possibly do.
Chuuya was standing still in a battlefield filled with bodies. Their enemies had died, but a lot of their men had died as well. Chuuyas men had died. And he should be used to people dying by now, but Dazai knew he never would be.
Blue eyes were confused and angry and sad. When they met Dazais they turned from confusion to murderous.
“You planned this!” Chuuya stomped up to him, slowly, threateningly. “What the fuck were you thinking!?”
“What do you mean?” He deadpanned “The enemy is defeated Chuuya”
Chuuya got into this space, stared him down with all the anger of the hundred men that had just died. “I could’ve taken care of them myself! Why the fuck is everyone dead!?”
He looked like he might cry, or hurt Dazai. He might deserve it.
“It was necessary” He said instead “Don’t worry your little brain about it” He hoped Chuuya wouldn’t see the lie.
Chuuya stared at him for a few more seconds before he simply turned and walked away.
Dazai didn’t realize he was holding his breath.
~||~
Chuuya didn’t speak to him after that.
Dazai didn’t know how to deal with it, he could handle the anger and the yelling and the fighting. This silence was suffocating him to the point where he hurt himself only to be able to breathe. He needed to fix this somehow. He knew he did but he couldn’t figure out how and Odasaku wasn’t any help, he just told him to talk to him.
So he did.
They were walking out of a meeting with Mori, it was the only time he had heard Chuuyas voice in the past week. Chuuya was cold, pretending as if he didn’t even exist. He felt like a child again, it made bile rise in his throat.
“Did the chibi forget how to speak?” He teased. He made sure to keep step with the other as they walked down the hall, tilted his head a bit to try to meet the others eye. “Maybe the ugly hat finally ate his brain?”
Chuuya kept his gaze straight. He didn’t give him as much as an inch of emotion.
“Is Chuuya really still mad about the other day?” He expected a reaction, anything. He should be angry again, yell at him. But Chuuya kept walking and didn’t look at him.
Dazai stopped. He wanted to scream. He wanted to scream that he was probably in love with him, and he made a bad judgment call because he couldn't bear watching him use corruption with the risk of him dying. He knew Chuuya would be okay, he would always make sure he was. But something ugly inside him wanted to eliminate the risk of anything happening completely. Even at the cost of other lives.
He had so many plans for them and it scared him that it could possibly end.
“I-” he breathed quietly “I messed up”. He looked at the wall next to him, at the ugly colors and the stupid paintings. He kept his breath even, knowing Chuuya would notice how much of a mess he was otherwise. Chuuya didn’t answer, but he knew he had stopped. Maybe he was waiting for Dazai to continue, but he didn’t know what to say. The words would stick in his throat like clotted blood.
He looked up slowly, and met blue eyes. Chuuya didn’t look angry, he was just watching him. It made Dazai think he never was angry, maybe he was just being punished.
A grin slowly stretched over Chuuyas lips “No reason to yell Mackerel”
Three: 22
Their reunion after four years apart had been planned down to the very last detail. But Chuuya had always been unpredictable. He was good at hiding his feelings when he wanted to and Dazai absolutely hated that. That being said, he was as easy to rile up as always and it was… fun. To some extent Dazai understood their relationship wouldn’t be as it was four years ago, but they still bantered as they used to.
Some time later he learnt Chuuya still trusted him fully. He used corruption and hoped Dazai would still save him from himself. It made his chest ache. He wanted nothing more than to go back to his Chuuya. He wanted to never have been apart so they wouldn’t have lost so much time.
But life had a funny way of taking everything away from Dazai.
He stood above the grave and hummed quietly to himself. It had become more difficult, talking to Odasaku. He hated talking about Chuuya and he didn’t want to talk about Ango. So he’d spend most of his time telling him about Atsushi and Kyouka. Oda would’ve loved them no doubt. Atsushi had even come by to introduce himself at some point. Life was a bit better on the good side.
The air shifted a bit and Dazai smiled. He didn’t need to look to the side to know it was Chuuya.
“I was wondering if you’d be here” Chuuya said, then, “Hello Oda”
He turned his head to look at the redhead with a teasing smile “Were you looking for me?”
Chuuya scoffed “Of course not, your emo self just always turn up here after something happens”
“Do I now?” He raised an eyebrow at the other “You’re keeping tabs on me?”
“Tch” Chuuya looked to the side with an annoyed look. “I know you as well as you know me, remember?”
Dazai hummed “I guess so”.
Chuuyas eyes weren’t as hard as they used to be. He looked curious and a bit tired, but he wasn’t as closed off as he was as a teenager. Which was strange because he definitely should be as a mafioso. He was closed off to other people, Dazai reminded himself unhelpfully. It made his heart speed up as it often did with Chuuya,
“I expected you to try to murder me first chance,” Dazai said. He looked back to the grave, he couldn't meet those eyes with the wrong amounts of anger. The amount being none.
“Do you want me to?”
Dazai sighed quietly, “Why aren’t you angry?”
“I’ve been angry, and now I’m not”
He had to look at the other then. He looked so calm, so unlike the Chuuya he was used to. But it wasn’t a bad change. It made thoughts of his ten year plan reappear. As a kid he made a stupid plan where if he survived that long he’d finally find a way to get Chuuya to date him. He had completely dropped the fantasy when he left the mafia. Because surely Chuuya would hate him with every fiber of his little body.
Chuuya smiled, a small and private thing. Dazai would burn down the world for him right then and there.
Four: 22
He whined for the fiftieth time that evening and Kunikida yelled at him in turn.
“Appreciate that the mafia is throwing this party for all of us!” He hissed.
Yosano sighed in response “They better have alcohol”
“They always do,” Dazai said. They were all dressed up in fancy clothes. Sure it wouldn’t be close to fancy enough for a mafia party but it was whatever. He was wearing a blue suit with gray accents and a tie for the first time in years. “If it’s boring I’m throwing myself off the closest cliff” He announced.
They had saved the city, no, the world, and the mafia was throwing a celebratory get together for everyone who had been involved. Which involved not only the agency but also the guild and the hunting dogs. It was a strange gathering and Dazai absolutely didn’t want to go. He had spent too long playing around all these people, all he wanted was to be alone and not pretend to be Dazai Osamu for a bit.
“If you don’t behave in there I’ll make sure you have triple the amount of paperwork for the coming month!”
Dazai gasped “But Kunikida!”
No one came to his rescue. Instead they all stepped out of the vehicle and walked up the grand steps to the building. It was a white large building that the mafia often used to host events. Dazai had hoped to never step foot in there again in his life.
They walked through the doors and were welcomed by way too many people. Dazai schooled his expression and put on a fake smile. This evening couldn’t end fast enough.
Later a few of them sat around a table, gossiping.
“Okay-” Yosano's eyes were sparkling, she was tipsy “Who here is dating?”
Dazai hummed but Ranpo was quicker.
“Dating or into each other? Because there’s a big difference”
His eyes met Ranpos then. Ranpo hadn’t told anyone about his infatuation with the novelist, which meant he probably didn’t want people to know. Likewise, Dazai didn’t want anyone to know about his not-thing with Chuuya. Ranpo rolled his eyes at him before he looked back to Yosano, but it let Dazai relax, he wouldn’t out him.
“Oh now I’m even more curious”
“I’m just waiting for baby Soukoku to finally get it together,” Dazai said.
“Get it together like?”
“Start dating?” He raised an eyebrow at her, wasn’t it obvious they were into each other? “Come on Akutagawa stopped killing for Atsushi's sake”
She nodded slowly.
“Speaking of Soukoku” Ranpo nodded toward the grazing table a bit away from them. Dazai turned much too quickly for the indifference he had been playing at. He blamed Ranpo.
Chuuya was standing at the long table, talking to a waiter about something. Probably asking about wine. He was wearing a dark red suit with a black shirt, he looked good.
Dazai left the two others without a second thought and walked over to him. He grabbed a flute of champagne on the way that he sipped at quickly before he stopped a decent space away from Chuuya. He wanted to be able to talk to the other without anyone else hearing, but he also didn’t want to make it seem like they were too close.
Chuuya looked at him as he stood there with his wine glass in hand, looking smug. It made Dazai wary, he didn’t have anything to be smug about.
“So I’ve been thinking,” Chuuya said with a hum.
“Probably a bad idea” He didn’t want to know. Had he walked into a trap?
“Oh trust me you want to know”
He looked the other over, studied his every expression. His eyes glittered as he met Dazais head on. He had no idea what he wanted.
“Fine, what is it?”
Chuuyas grin turned feral for a second before he pulled himself together and cleared his throat, “Ah what was it, Our fate will not-”
“Chuuya!” He exclaimed quickly, to shut him up. “Don’t you even dare”
“Shut up, I'm in the middle of my speech!” The speech from Meursault he had never wanted to hear again. Chuuya furrowed his brows playfully and continued. “Our fate will not end in a place like-”
Dazai threw the flute at him, after draining it of course. Chuuya caught it easily by the foot between two fingers.
“You shut up!” Dazai seethed. He will absolutely not listen to Chuuya make a fool out of him.
Chuuya laughed loudly, “-in a place like this,”
Dazai grabbed a bun from the table and threw it, Chuuya laughed and batted it away. He grabbed another food and another.
“Stop!”
“Because you and I-” Chuuya snorted. He places another glass Dazai had thrown on the table easily “Are destined to-”
“I hate you!” Dazai exclaimed. “Why did I even think talking with you could be-” He blew up his cheeks before letting the air out at once.
“I wish I knew how it ended” Chuuya grinned “The speech was much too short”
“Because you made it short!” Dazai huffed “You literally shot me to shut me up”
Chuuya laughed again. He was much too happy about this. Dazai didn’t want to deal with it, he didn’t have to. With a roll of his eyes he turned away from Chuuya and walked back to Ranpo and Yosano.
He ignored everyone's eyes on them. Though he saw Mori shaking his head tiredly in the corner.
Five: 23
“Hey Dazai?”
He hummed as he looked out the window of the car. They weren’t going over the speed limit for once. Chuuya was being legal for no reason whatsoever.
“Why am I here?”
He glanced at the other. Chuuyas eyes were on the road, but he was calm, as if he wanted to show he wouldn’t be angry no matter the answer. Dazai didn’t pretend like he didn’t understand the question even though he wanted to. Playing dumb was one of his favorite pastimes.
“Why wouldn’t the strongest ability user in Japan be part of the plan?”
“That’s not what I asked”
So maybe it wasn’t.
“You could’ve done this with your new partner, or alone honestly” They were driving through forest, on their way back to Yokohama “Why did you need the strongest ability user in Japan?”
Dazai hummed again, to bide his time. He hadn’t really needed to convince anyone that he and Chuuya would be a team in this one. They had all seen what they could do last year. But Chuuya was right in that he didn’t need him. Dazai was more than capable of doing most things alone, and so was Chuuya. That didn’t mean he wanted to. If Dazai had gone alone he would’ve probably tried to kill himself, if Chuuya had gone alone he would’ve drank himself to sleep that first night.
But Chuuya wasn’t going over the speed limit, he was in no hurry to get back. It made something ache inside Dazai. The atmosphere inside the car was light and calm. He wished he could live here forever, sleep to the sound of Chuuya humming along to songs on the radio, and point out funny things he’d see. He wanted to stay here with Chuuya until he couldn't anymore.
He hadn’t pushed much to put them together on this mission, but he did make sure of it. It felt like he would go insane. When the only times he’d meet Chuuya was during missions their organizations cooperated on, it happened once in a blue moon. He wanted so much more than that.
He looked at Chuuya, considered telling him as much. All he wanted was to spend more time with him. To hurt his own heart with being almost close enough.
“I didn’t” He answered eventually “But I might have”
Chuuya rolled his eyes but didn’t call out his obvious lie.
He drove at the speed limit, yet they made it back to Yokohama way too quickly.
Plus one: 23
He unbuttoned his vest and threw it into the closet where he hid his dirty clothes. He was tired, not physically but mentally, he was done with everything and everyone.
He fell down on the tatami and reached into another one of the closets, where he hid the sake. Sake didn’t have a high enough alcohol percentage for tonight, but it would have to do.
He had been on an awful mission over the day, all he wanted was to drink enough to sleep more than a few hours this once. He hadn’t even taken a sip before there was a knock on the door.
He sighed and got up, this day couldn’t get any worse.
He didn’t expect to see his ex partner, in all his mafia glory.
“Chuuya?” he gripped onto the door in confusion and something like nervousness. Chuuyas eyes were piercing, determined.
“I’m tired of waiting” He said and pushed past Dazai into the room.
Dazai blinked a few times before he closed the door softly and turned to the redhead.
“I don’t even know what the fuck I’m waiting on” Chuuya continued, He was watching Dazai closely, he sounded frustrated. “No matter where we are I will still be in the mafia and you won't” He motioned with his arms outward, to Dazais room. As if that meant anything.
“What do you mean?” He felt his heart race, swallowing over a lump that hadn’t been there a second ago.
“I mean what the fuck I said” Chuuya said and raised his chin up “I’m tired of waiting on you to make some fucking plan for how we could possibly be together” He took a deep breath “I don’t give a single fuck what Mori thinks and you know it”
Dazai opened his mouth to answer but nothing came out. Chuuya stepped closer to him, crowded him against the door. Dazai couldn't breathe.
“You do” He said quietly “you care a lot”
Chuuya shook his head, he held a hand to Dazais chest, listened to his heartbeat “I’m tired of waiting, I told you already- oh” He sounded worried then “Don’t cry”
“I’m not” Dazai pouted but he had to blink rapidly to keep true to his words “Are you serious?”
“Deadly fucking serious”
Dazai nodded quickly and finally sucked in a breath. “You know I’ll figure it out” He promised. Whatever happened with Mori or their organizations, Dazai would make sure nothing ever got between them.
Chuuya smiled at him, it was warm and soft “Then I’ll be in your hands” The hand moved to Dazais neck to pull him down. He went easily, leaned into the other.
When they kissed it was soft. In a way he never thought they could be. Chuuya grabbed onto his face, peppered kisses onto his lips, cheeks and eyelids. Dazai didn’t cry, but he was shaking and he thought Chuuya might be as well. Everything he ever wanted was suddenly in his hands, he could hold it tightly. He’d never let go.
“Finally” Chuuya breathed and Dazai could do nothing but agree. From the moment he was seventeen and finally figured it out til now felt like an eternity.
“I’d burn down the world for you” Dazai breathed. It felt like a confession long overdue, it lifted a weight off of his chest.
Chuuya grabbed his face, forced him to meet his eyes “As long as you let me watch”