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“These heels are fucking killing me,” Alexa says, coming around the corner into the drinks area.
“That’s why you’re breaking them in on a short flight, not some trans-Atlantic,” answers Andrea, not looking up as she rummages in the cabinet for some Bloody Mary mix.
Alexa groans briefly. “I know, I’m going to stop whining about it now. Besides, I truly have nothing to complain about in comparison to 3B.”
Andrea’s eyebrows raise quizzically. “Since when do we have any sympathy for the first class contingent?”
Alexa doesn’t get to answer before Lachlan bursts in with the goofiest grin on his face, tempered only by the glint in his eye that both co-workers recognise instantly.
“I know that face,” Alexa smirks. “What juicy gossip did you get about some passenger and how long did it take you to then invite them to join the mile high club?”
[Note to challenge judges: there’s no fucking way I can fit in smut between my main characters in 1650 words—also, frankly, ew—so here’s your reference to smut. This is all you get. You’ll take it and you’ll like it.]
Lachlan gasps. “I would never! Especially this boy, he’s head over heels with an estranged lover and he’s chasing him overseas even as we speak.”
“Like, gimme-any-ticket-you-have-left-please-Mr.-Flock-of-Seagulls-chasing him?” Andrea asks with eagerness. (Yes, all flight attendants have memorized those scenes from The Wedding Singer, it’s part of the job description.)
“Basically, and it’s so romantic and yet so tragic.” Lachlan is welling up but he’s not going to let emotions get in the way of a good story. “So—he’s a uni student who hooked up with some hot guy the week before classes, it turns out to be his professor—“ Lachlan pauses for the shocked response, “—then somehow they manage to keep meeting up during the term—”
“Oh, no,” Andrea interjects. “There’s no way this ends well.”
Lachlan shakes his head vehemently. “No, that’s the thing, seems like it went well?” The three exchange glances of disbelief. “They learn from each other and share feelings and open up and grow??”
“So then why the running?” Alexa asks, scowling as she sees 2A’s call light go on.
“Get this, the professor was on a one-term contract and had to go back home to Portugal!” Lachlan is definitely misting up. “Even though he clearly had feelings for 22C and you could just tell things would have worked out if the university had let him stay!”
Alexa rolls her eyes as she ducks out and Andrea giggles as she turns to a checklist. Lachlan glares at them both.
“It’s true! They had a chance!”
“Ok, but then the guy left? Are you out there giving 22C hope even though he’s maybe chasing a pipe dream across Europe?”
“It’s not a pipe dream! João loved him!”
“Did he say that?” Andrea intones meaningfully, restocking the cups.
Alexa was back before Lachlan could answer. “Well my guy definitely loves the one he’s chasing, even if he wasn’t quite ready to admit that to me.”
Four eyes stare back at her and she grins like an oversatisfied Cheshire Cat.
Lachlan asks first. “Wait—you also have a chaser?”
“Yeah, that’s what I was gonna say, 3B! He’s totally fallen for—get this—his brother-in-law! And no one in the family knows, they’re keeping it a secret, it was too much—so the kid packed a bag and ran.”
Andrea always has the more nuanced, reasonable perspective. “Did he run, or did he need some space to think? Also, did you say kid ?”
“Yeah…apparently there’s a slight age difference. But the boyfriend sounds very mature and like they truly found a connection.”
“Oh, they’re boyfriends already, are they?” Skepticism and sappiness war in Lachlan’s eyes.
Alexa giggles out of glee; she too wants to believe in romance. “You should have heard this story! It’s not every day that you have a hook-up that a) goes extremely well, 2) creates actual feelings, and iii) seems like it’s not gonna work out but somehow prompts you to throw caution to the wind and dash across international borders!”
“And yet somehow the two of you both found one on the same flight!” Andrea chuckles as she flips on the fasten seatbelts light and grabs the intercom.
“Attention passengers, we have begun our descent into Humberto Delgado Airport. Thank you for traveling with us, and we do hope you enjoy your stay here in Lisbon or wherever your final destination is.” Her eyes twinkle and she can’t resist. “As always, we’re happy to share a few basic Portuguese vocabulary words that we hope are useful on your trip: molho de salada, chupão, and axilas.”
*****
Three days later
“Hey, that’s my bag!”
“Oh shit, sorry! It’s almost exactly the same as mine. Ah, yep - here’s mine, seen a bit more action,” he chuckles before adding, “Sorry for the mix up.”
“Ah, no worries.”
“Although, uh…” David peers closer at the young man seated at his side in the waiting area. He looks somewhat familiar but also, he looks sad. “Are you okay?”
A delayed departure and two broken hearts mean that the conversation develops quickly, and soon they’ve realized they share the same name, the same failed attempt at getting back together with an ex, and the same need to figure out how to move forward. Suddenly uni David realizes something.
“Oh my god. Was that yours—a guy came up to me right before I came through security. He said he loved me. But then I got a better look at his face and realized I had no idea who he was.” Uni David looks up at accountant David. “Could that have been your ex? Could he have run to catch you here and missed you?”
“Uh….did he have curly hair, striking eyes, a tongue piercing?” Uni David nods in silence. Accountant David can only choke out—“Olly came!”
A beat. “Wait. Curly-haired Olly? Olly who?”
“Olly Spring. Do you know him?”
“Olly Spring??” Uni David narrows his eyes. “Younger brother of Charlie Spring, who is dating my ridiculous brother Nick Nelson?”
“Yes, yes, I know, it’s a horrible idea to fall in love with your brother-in-law—wait, what? Your brother Nick Nelson?”
They stare at each other warily as details begin to thunk into place. You know…they really don’t look all that different. You could hardly blame Olly. And it’s no surprise they breathe out the next phrase in unison.
“I think I need a drink.”
*****
Alexa is checking to see if there’s a spare jump seat that she can grab, having stayed a few days extra for that otter convention. But what’s that commotion over in the seating area? She wanders over closer to eavesdrop better.
“Sir, you two really can’t board the plane like this, I’m sorry.”
“This is ridiculoush! I’m going to sue! I’m a hot-shot lawyer, you know!”
Gate attendant Harry sighs. “No, you’re not, sir, we’ve been through this. You’re an accountant.”
“Ah, fuck, I keep forgetting.” His face changes from annoyed to wistful. “Olly kept calling me corporate, you know, it’s not my fault the details slipped through the cracks!”
“And my guy didn’t call me at all!” pipes up the younger version. Alexa’s eyes widen as she watches the two completely sloshed Davids try to comfort each other. It’s really kind of sweet.
“You don’t know that!” Thirty-something David may be on the edge of sobriety, but he’s patient and thoughtful and supportive. As are all Davids once they work through their trauma. He grabs uni David’s shoulders. “You had those missed calls from last night! I bet that was him!”
He then remembers the point of this conversation and swings his head back round towards Harry. “Anyway we are not too drunk to get on this plane!”
Another sigh. “That’s debatable, but that’s not the point anyway. We can’t allow you on the plane because you’re the same person. You’re just separated by about a decade or so in time, as we’ve established. If I let you both on, it could cause a temporal anomaly, and we’re RyanAir—we have enough of those in our schedule already.”
Alexa interjects at that. “But we had them both together on our inbound flight! I remember!”
“Was it before the 31st?” Harry queries wearily. At an affirmative nod, he continues. “Yeah, we were beta-testing a program where two versions of the same person could ride the same flight. Wanted to see if that would free up half a seat here and there, but unfortunately there were….incidents. Discontinued.” He shakes his head. “Anyway the point is you just can’t do it!”
Uni David stands to his feet, wobbling amusingly. “That is not the point! The point is maybe João and Olly did try to find us, and that means something!”
Accountant David turns to him again and grabs his hands. “No, David, that’s not the point either.” His eyes are earnest. He’s realized something. “The point is that no matter what they did, we are worthy. We are learning and growing and healing on our own and they could have had an amazing relationship with us”—they’re both tearing up now—“but even if they don’t, we still matter.”
“David, are you saying….”
“Yes, David, I am. I’m saying it loud and proud, finally: I love you!”
Alexa’s eyes are glistening (someone must be cutting onions) and she belatedly realizes her colleague has walked away. She runs after him.
“Hey! What are you gonna do about them?”
He looks surprised. “Oh! They’re fine now!” She looks confused so he explains. “I’ve seen this happen before. They’ve had a couple jugs of margaritas and professed their love for their inner child. Any moment now they’re going to break out into a duet of ‘Wind Beneath My Wings.’ They can fly home on that.”