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“So, that’s everything! Do you have any questions?”
Sir Pentious stared down at the mysterious young angel who had just given him a whirlwind tour with wide eyes, casting about mentally for something to say. “I–um…”
She stared right back at him fearlessly. It was strange how comfortable the beings here were with eye contact. Rather than the nervous avoidance of a weaker sinner or the cold glare of an overlord, angels tended to look at you openly, but without malice. They didn’t mean any harm by it–at least, he didn’t think so–but he couldn’t exactly say that he was comfortable with it, either.
Seemingly noticing his discomfort, she smiled at him reassuringly. “Hey, I understand, this is probably all really overwhelming for you, right? Say, why don’t I introduce you to another human soul who could help you settle in, that might help you be more comfortable, right?”
He smiled back awkwardly. “Right.”
She squealed and took him by the hand, dragging him across the road toward a small cafe. “Perfect! I know just the person. Molly!” She dropped his hand abruptly and raced toward one of the tables, where a pale, pink-and-white-haired demon hopped up and wrapped her arms around Emily, giggling. Hmmm, Sir Pentious mused, rubbing his chin as he looked at her. She’s…familiar.
“Emmy! How the heck are ya!” Molly squealed, squeezing the other angel tight. “Oh, gosh, where are my manners? Who’s this?” She held out a third hand toward Sir Pentious around Emily’s back, and he took it, shaking bemusedly.
Emily pulled back. “This is Sir Pentious! He just got here, and I was hoping that you could help him get settled in…” She looked around furtively, then lowered her voice. “Is there anywhere we could talk about this more privately?”
“Well, sure, my apartment’s just around the corner.” They made it there quickly, the two girls chatting animatedly as Sir Pentious trailed behind. He couldn’t help but feel a bit annoyed at how many fewer eyes this new body had–he wanted to look everywhere, see everything. It was just all so…different from hell, all white and gold, and not a sex shop or ongoing murder in sight. But, even so, there were elements that reminded him of the place that had been his home for so many years. He couldn’t count how many times during the tour he had seen something and thought “Charlie would love that” or “She looks like Vaggie” or “I wish they were here.”
When they had settled into the living room of Molly’s small apartment (on the ground floor, thank God–stairs had never exactly been Pentious’s strong suit), Emily’s voice grew more serious. “So. Molly. Sir Pentious isn’t just any new arrival.”
Molly nodded. “Well, I figured, since ya seemed so anxious to talk in private. So, what is it about him?”
“Well…two things,” Emily admitted. “First, he’s a seraph.”
Molly gasped. “Well, gosh, that is something! Has there ever been a seraph who wasn’t heavenborn?”
Emily shook her head. “But that’s not all, Molly. Sir Pentious…is the first successfully redeemed soul that I know of, in all of human history.”
One set of Molly’s hands flew to her cheeks in shock. “No shit! Well, how exciting!”
Emily squealed. “Eeee, I know! Oh, I can’t wait to be able to tell Charlie, you remember, that girl I was telling you about with the hotel? He was part of her program!”
Molly squealed and wrapped both sets of arms around him excitedly, the sensation stirring that sense of recognition again. “Oh gosh, that’s just wonderful! Well, don’t you worry about a thing, Sir Pentious, you can stay here with me, I’ve got an extra room. Oh, this’ll be so much fun, I always wanted a roommate…”
Sir Pentious zoned out slightly. She was just…so familiar. Now really, who does this girl remind me of? All of a sudden, it came to him, and he spoke out without thinking, interrupting the girls’ conversation. “Angel Dust.”
The two women stopped talking abruptly and peered at him intently. “What?” Molly asked.
“Oh…I…” He sighed. “It’s nothing. You remind me of someone, that’s all.”
“Really? Who?” Molly asked.
“Someone I knew from the hotel. A man named Angel Dust.”
Molly frowned slightly, looking sad. “Oh. I see.”
“What’s the matter, Molly?” Emily asked, gazing at the other angel intently with those wide, innocent blue eyes.
Molly laughed softly. “Tch, it’s nothing. I just…you know, my brother, Anthony…”
Emily covered her mouth sympathetically and nodded, patting Molly gently on the back. “Her brother overdosed on PCP,” she whispered over the other angel’s fluffy hair to Sir Pentious, who was sitting still, unsure what to do in the face of this show of emotion. He nodded slightly, his confusion showing on his face, and Emily sighed. “You know…they call it angel dust…” Oh.
Molly wiped her eyes, dusting off her lower set of hands and standing up abruptly. “Ah, no use worrying about it. Heaven’s a big place, you know. I’m sure I’ll find Tony any day now.” She offered a fragile smile, then headed toward the door. “Come on, Sir Pentious, I’ll show you around a little more. You know, I gotta say, the pasta here is even better than it was on Earth. I know this great spot, we could go, have a nice dinner…”
The two women left the apartment arm-in-arm, talking happily, and as Sir Pentious made to follow them, he noticed a photograph hanging by the door: two grinning, gap-toothed children, a boy and a girl. Probably her and her brother, he thought. But it’s the strangest thing…that boy’s smile is just like Angel’s.
***
That night, Sir Pentious was exhausted. Not used to meeting so many new people (not to mention dying again), he was out cold almost as soon as his head met the pillow (although his rest was a bit more fitful without the warm, reassuring forms of the Egg Boiz surrounding him). However, after what felt like hardly any time at all, he was awoken by a sharp whisper.
“Psst, Sir Pentious…”
The snake angel’s eyes snapped open, and he bolted up in bed. “What is it? Who’s there?” he hissed, hood spreading threateningly, eyes snapping around the room until they landed on a shadowy figure in the corner.
There was a small squeak, and the shadowy figure moved forward into the shaft of light coming through his window. Sir Pentious dropped his defensive stance and slithered out of bed toward the small angel standing in his room, a heartbroken expression on her innocent face. “Emily? My dear, whatever is the matter?”
The female seraph sniffled softly. “I…I came to say goodbye.”
He frowned. “What? You aren’t making any sense.”
She sighed softly. “Sera…refuses to tell the residents of Hell that you are here…that redemption is possible. So, I’m going to tell them myself.”
“How?” Sir Pentious asked.
Emily looked up at him determinedly. “My sister is the only one with the ability to create portals to Hell. So, I’ll have to get there the hard way.” She laughed softly, but there was no mirth to the sound. “Oh, this will be a scandal. How will you explain this one away, Sera?”
One could practically see the gears whizzing in Sir Pentious’s mind as he puzzled over Emily’s meaning…until it hit him like a ton of bricks. “Wait! Emily, you don’t mean–”
“Oh, yes I do,” she said. “I will fall.”
Sir Pentious opened his mouth, thinking perhaps to attempt to convince her out of it, or to ask her to reconsider. But instead, even he was surprised at his words. “Take me with you.”
But, as he thought about it, it made sense. He had spent most of his life and afterlife utterly alone. The hotel, despite the…quirks of its inhabitants, was the first place he had ever felt truly at home, with the first people he had ever truly considered friends.
Emily smiled at him sadly. “I’m afraid not. You aren’t strong enough yet. The fall would kill you. But I promise, I will tell your friends what happened.” She hesitated. “Is…is there anything else? That I should tell them?”
He thought. “Well…can you ask Angel Dust if he had a sister?”
She cocked her head. “Wha–OH. Oh my, do you really think…”
He nodded earnestly. “I mean, they look so similar, and…”
She nodded back. “Of course.”
“Oh!” he added hurriedly. “And, um, Cherri Bomb…tell her I’m sorry, for dying… Wait, tell everyone that, actually.”
She giggled softly, covering her mouth with one gray hand. “Of course.” The nervous smile she offered him quickly disappeared, and she looked on the verge of tears. Sir Pentious grimaced slightly. Fuck. Emotions.
He held his arms out hesitantly, and she immediately rushed into them, pressing her face into his chest. “Oh my gosh,” she mumbled. “Am I really doing this?”
“I won’t blame you, if you don’t want to,” Sir Pentious admitted. “From the sound of it, it’s rather dangerous.”
She pulled back and shook her head firmly. “No. No, I have to do this. How can I call myself virtuous if I don’t?” She wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. “Goodbye, Sir Pentious.” And just like that, she vanished–fading out in a flash of light, like she had never been there at all.
***
Emily sat on the edge of a cloud, bare feet dangling, staring down at the surface below. Far, far below.
She knew that the fall would hurt. Her wings would be able to slow her down a bit, but intentionally leaving Heaven would significantly decrease her angelic abilities, at least for a time. But…she also knew that she couldn’t live with herself if she let something like that stop her from doing what was right.
She reached up to her head, grabbing her halo in both of hands, and, with a sharp exhale, she brought it down over one knee, snapping it in two.
For a split second, everything was silent, as if all of Heaven was holding its breath. Then, she could hear pandemonium behind her. There was the telltale sound of her sister’s teleportation, followed by a pleading voice. “Emily, wait! You don’t have to do this–please–”
But Emily paid no mind. She learned forward, ignoring her sister’s screams–
And fell.