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“Dance with me…”
The willowy whisper that tickled Chat’s ear was almost missed among the plethora of voices in the room that shouted about going to the carnival in town, or about heading to the local tavern for a drink because the drinks at ManSuang were too familiar or bland, or just general commotion of cleaning up after their rehearsal for tomorrow’s performance for the visiting governor. Chat was glad his senses were in tune with the mischievous whisperer whom he turned to address, “With me?” Chat sounded confused in his own mind, and he mentally winced at sounding weird.
“No silly…I said with me…” The fellow pointed at himself, shoulders shaking in amusement yet no hint of disdain or judgement for Chat’s confusion, just endless patience, “I’m the one who asked just now.”
The brilliant smile that flashed in Chat’s direction, filled with untainted innocence only made something gather in Chat’s throat at knowing this man’s past was seared with pain and injustice; however, he still had the strength to smile. His Khem still had the tenderness to flash him happiness. He questioned the possibility of finding such beauty underneath the pile of rubble. Chat admired the tenacity of this lithe dancer that captivated him. “I was repeating for emphasis Khem.”
“You were confused Chat.”
“Maybe…you caught me off guard Khem.”
“I know. You always listen to Teacher Mae’s instructions perfectly,” Khem stuck his tongue out playfully, “Studious student…”
A grumble from Chat earned him a patted shoulder and he watched as Khem gathered to his feet with practiced grace that drew Chat’s line of vision to the bare feet and ankles, pictured them adorned with the finest jewelry from all of the Kingdom (briefly wondered if he’d be able to manage to sneak into the palace to steal some), then up along the calves following the line of his legs and –
“Are you going to stare at my legs all day?”
“I mean they are beautiful—wait—"
Chat’s eyes snapped around the area in an anxious moment in case they weren’t alone, and others maybe listening to their casual conversation, with Khem openly teasing him like this. But thankfully, he noticed no one around as everyone had dispersed for the night, and visibly relaxed. “Khem…” He sighed a chiding of the younger’s name as he stood up, brushed off any lingering dust from the stage and heard the bout of giggles, “You enjoy teasing me.”
“Your reactions are very charming Khun Chat.” Khem remarked with his hands behind his back, bounced on the balls of his feet as he waited, tilted his head to observe this dashing man. The only one who managed to make his heart skip a beat, his breath to hitch, and his mind to swirl endlessly at the possibilities that may never be. He shook his head free of that idea – they were here now, and they were together.
The elder of the two grabbed the drum to set it aside before returning to stand promptly in front of Khem, “You wanted to dance…with me?”
“Mhm.”
“Why Khem?”
Khem rolled his eyes at the line of questioning as he remembered that Chat was very much an analytical guy, inquisitive, and offered his hand, “Not here though.”
“That didn’t really answer my question…” Chat looked about again then back to Khem’s determined face and softened. Despite everything, Khem appeared to be more confident in them than he was, that made Chat more determined to step up his game as he nodded, “Lead the way.”
“That’s the spirit!” Khem’s laugh was light and breezy as he pulled at the man off the stage, out of the practice room, and down the hallway down towards the backdoor, where their shoes were propped. to head outside. Without even releasing each other’s hand, they put their shoes on. Their lifeline it seemed.
“Outside?” Where anyone can see us? Chat finished the question in his head.
“Naturally~” Where we are free… Khem echoed the unspoken inquiry.
The grip on Chat’s hand was firm, warm, and a touch clammy considering that Khem had been practicing hard with the others in preparation. Chat took the risk to interlace their fingers, earned a surprised squeak from Khem, whose cheeks colored slightly, and Chat smiled to himself. Being spontaneous had its perks. He followed like a dutiful pup being led to a small grass area, looked around to see endless amounts of greenery in the dark and their tree in the distance. “Are we heading to our tree?”
“Nope! Right here is the spot.” Khem released Chat’s hand in favor of using both to emphasize the area. “Tada! The stage I’ve picked for us Chat.”
Chat’s brow raised, “For us?”
“You have a lot of questions and no faith.” Khem stomped his foot with his lower lip jutting out, hands going to his hips, “Can’t you see it?”
Chat’s other brow climbed his forehead to join the first. “Not really.”
A sigh escaped Khem in playful frustration as he walked to Chat, placed his hands gingerly on the broad chest as they slid up to cup the man’s face between his coarse palms. “Do you trust me?”
“With my life…” was the instant response.
Both were surprised at the ready admission from Chat, as they hadn’t spoken about things like love or love confessions. So, he brushed it off with a flustered nod of his head that fluffed his hair and stared back into those dutiful eyes. “Then look around at our stage…”
Chat peeled his eyes from the golden irises that were like the brightest stars to look up at the actual stars in the night sky that were tattooed on the dark blue canvas, the moon etched, and he let out a low breath, “Beautiful…”
“I thought so!” Khem dropped his hands to spin around as he laughed infectiously. “Our first dance together!”
“…We’ve danced before Khem…”
Khem paused with his back to Chat, a bout of shyness overcame him as he kicked at a small rock in the grass with a quiet murmur, “This is our first as…um…as a pair…”
Chat tilted his head to the side as he stepped closer to Khem to listen. “What was that?” He’d heard it. Like the whisper in the stage room, he’d heard it. He’d just wanted to hear that confirmation again. That they were a pair as he tiptoed closer. “I didn’t hear you.” He was silent in his steps.
Another huff escaped Khem as he whirled back to presumably chide Chat for not listening to him when a gasp escaped him at how close Chat got in the short amount of time, their chests an inch apart and Chat’s face lowered to be nearer to his own, and he licked his dry lips. “Yes, you did.”
“Yes, I did. But I wanted to hear it again.” Chat settled one hand onto Khem’s waist, thumbed the fabric of the shirt, and smiled. “And again…” the other hand joined in mirroring on the other side of that tiny waist before it traveled up along to brush Khem’s hair from his face. “And again.” Chat cupped the tanned cheek to rub the pad of his thumb against its silky texture.
“You are an odd man Chat…”
“I’ll take that as a compliment from my enigmatic dancer.”
Khem laughed as he leaned his face into the palm that easily supported the weight, stared at Chat’s outline in the moonlight and beamed, “I’ll say it again after we finish our dance.”
“I’m at your disposal…beloved…”
The nickname made a blush spread to Khem’s ears in happiness that this man thought him worthy of ‘being loved’ and he lifted his own hands to cup around Chat’s shoulders and begin the sway. “I read about this Western dance. It’s a soft sway…”
“Read?”
“Okay I looked at the pictures…don’t tease me Chat.”
“No, my beloved.” Chat shook his head to assure he wasn’t teasing, went so far as to press a kiss to his forehead when he noticed Khem’s eyes were downcast for a moment. “I’m so very proud of you for always learning new things.”
Khem blinked away the tears that threatened to fall down his face: why did he want to cry? He was in the arms of someone who cherished him, praised him, supported him…shouldn’t he be happy? A glance at the sincerity shown on Chat’s face, as they swayed together in this slow dance that had no music except the drumming of their hearts to the same beat, had Khem understand. The tears were happy ones and he wanted nothing more than to cherish Chat. “I’m proud of you too Chat.”
Chat chuckled at the returned sentiment, pulled his lips into a familiar, dimpled smile, and nodded, “Your praise is all I need in this lifetime.”
“Just my praise Chat?” Khem said with an innocent flutter of his eyelashes. “Praise? I can praise you every day and every night. How handsome you are, how charming you are, how…wonderful you are.” Khem stepped to give another swish of his hips that Chat automatically followed, a pop of his hips to the other side that again Chat followed, and he snickered, “How perfect you are.”
The elder man shifted his arm to wrap itself around that lithe waist to pull Khem flush against himself. He heard the feathery giggles as Chat’s face pressed kisses that started at the base of Khem’s neck, traced up to his jawline, all the while murmuring, “My beloved…my heart…” He felt the courage that trickled from Khem into himself, and he leaned back to see those eyes had closed happily drunk on Chat’s affections. “My love…”
“Eep?!” Khem opened his eyes widely in surprise, “L…love?”
“Yes, love. Will you allow me to love you in this lifetime?”
Khem let out a choked whisper of suppressed emotions, but his face screamed joy. “Only if you’ll promise to let me love you in the next lifetime too.”
“I promise.”
It wasn’t an empty promise because it was made with sincerity, with determination, and, of course, the abundance of love that they made this vow underneath the audience of the stars and the moon. Chat perked his brows to wiggle them. “We normally seal deals you know?”
“Mmm. I don’t have a paintbrush.” Khem’s cheeks still the bright red, the shine of unshed tears in his eyes, and he puckered his lips. “Will a kiss work?”
“It’s perfect Khem.”
Chat’s hand pushed back any lingering strands of the soft brown hair as he dipped down as Khem rose to meet him the rest of the way, to join their lips. The sensation of their lips meeting was bliss, as Chat kept his arm around Khem’s waist to support it securely in their embrace. The kiss lasted only a moment but was seared into Chat’s soul forever.
“Should we finish this dance Chat?” Khem commented shyly as he tended to be after he and Chat kissed. It was different to when they were intimate and kissing. The gesture was warm and loving, a striking contrast to his past, Chat healed everything in him, and their kisses were stamps of approval that Khem couldn’t get enough of, despite feeling unworthy of them. He knew Chat would spoil him with more if he asked.
“To copy your words…only if you promise this won’t be our last Khem.” Chat admonished, then got a nod of that head, his heart put at ease. Both arms went back around that lithe waist as Khem hugged his shoulders and they swayed together. He could hear the blades of grass like violins, the cricket chirps like bells that chimed, and the breathy giggles that erupted from Khem when Chat dipped him in between the pauses. He knew that things were not always going to be to their advantage; however, he was assured that this was where he was meant to be.
This lifetime, with this man, with this love.
“I love you Khem…”
“And I love you Chat…”
Chat scooped Khem up by the grip he held, twirled him around to hear more and more of the sunshine laughter that burst through and lighted his way, yes. He’d hear it and he’d always love it. Mentally he prayed he’d be granted fifty lifetimes to love this man and receive his love in turn. Even if some were more restrained than others, Chat would be fighting for all of them regardless of having Khem by his side who he could tell was equally determined.
He couldn’t wait.
-Done-