Chapter Text
Starscream remembers the last battle against the Quintessons only in flashes, but he is certain of one thing: he’s glad the Autobots and Decepticons banded together against their foe, because, alone, either faction would have been decimated.
Speaking of decimated, he feels kind of awful, like he fits in his frame even worse than usual, and that is saying something. His vision is dark, and his audials only seem to pick up bits and pieces of what’s being said. He hears Optimus, and Soundwave, and an obnoxious voice that has to be Knock Out’s, and if he’s in the medbay then that must be Ratchet. They’re speaking in hushed whispers, and Starscream cannot make sense of anything.
Slowly, his optics go online, and the mechs around him get quiet. There are even more people looking at him than he thought, mostly high command from both factions. He understands that he is an essential asset to the Cybertronian cause, and that he got hurt pretty bad during the last battle, but it doesn’t make a lot of sense for everyone to be here. Starscream has sustained worse -- at the hands of Megatron, even, who is staring at him like he has seem a ghost.
He sits up, and looks at everyone. All of high command is indeed there, including fragging Shockwave. Why even.
“And here we go! Fully functional and online,” Knock Out says, his cheerful tone grating on Starscream’s audials. “Welcome back to the land of the living, Commander. How are you feeling?”
Again, Starscream does not feel good, but, “I’ve seen better days, but I’ll live.”
Then, he notices neither one of his trine is there to see him, as is their normal when he gets injured -- especially for Thundercracker, the worrywart.
“Where is my trine?” he asks, and everyone looks somewhat uncomfortable at the question. This immediately makes Starscream suspicious, so he goes to send them a message through the bond, only to find out that there is no bond, an emptiness of feeling where before he could feel Skywarp and Thundercracker deep in his spark. “Where. Is. My. Trine?”
He can feel himself start to shake, the idea of his trinemates dead so horrifying that his body can’t handle it. If he can’t feel the bond, after all, it has been broken, and if it’s been broken then one or both or them died. Curiously, he can’t feel the acute pain that he knows accompanies a broken trine bond, but he’s stopped feeling proper pain maybe a thousand reformats ago, on purpose, so it doesn’t really mean anything.
Just as he feels he’s about to purge his empty tank, Soundwave speaks up.
“Skywarp, Thundercracker: physically well, not dead.”
That is good to hear, and these days there is no real reason for Soundwave to lie to him, so he does believe him. Still.
“Why can’t I feel them?” Starscream asks. “The bond. It’s gone. Did they break it? Why did they break, what-”
Ratchet puts a hand on his shoulder, and Starscream’s shakes slow slightly.
“They didn’t break the bond, Starscream.” This is good news. “You did.”
What.
“What?” the seeker almost shrieks. “I would never break our bond, they’re my trine! I lov-”
He stops himself, out of habit. In the Decepticons, it was never good to admit such a thing. But things are different now.
“I love them,” he finally says. “I wouldn’t break our bond. And I certainly don’t remember doing so.”
Once again, everyone looks at each other in a really weird way, like they know something Starscream doesn’t. Well, of course they do. They just need to get out with it.
Ratchet sighs. Starscream can understand, the ambulance deals with too much bullshit.
“You died, Starscream. That’s why the bond broke.”
The words seem almost impossible. Not almost, actually impossible. He isn’t dead, he is sure of it. Certainly not the most alive he’s ever felt, since he did take quite the beating from the Quintesson forces, but he can feel his spark spinning in its casing, and Knock Out said he was functional. It doesn’t make any sense.
As though sensing his thoughts, Knock Out says, “Congratulations on the aberrant spark, Commander. A pity you had to find out about it by literally dying, but at least it means you can’t be killed in any way that matters.”
From the corner of the room, where Starscream had been happily ignoring him, Prowl scoffs. “Aberrant spark?”
“I believe you Autobots call it an outlier,” Megatron explains. “From what I gather, Starscream’s ability is resurrection.”
“In essence, yes,” Ratchet agrees. “He grayed, but got his color back in about three hours, and is now fully functional after five. If I believed in them, I’d call it a miracle, but to me it seems like a very convenient outlier ability.”
“That Starscream would be able to avoid death by all means is simply logical,” Shockwave says, earning a laugh from Megatron.
The conversation keeps going, the two medics explaining the situation to high command -- who must be very glad that one of their strategists and also their Air Commander was not in fact dead.
Starscream tries to process the information, he really does, but all he can think about is his trine. He can’t feel the pain of a broken bond because he was the one to die, but he is pretty sure his trine can. Also...
“Soundwave,” he says, and the mech in question straightens. “You said my trine was fine physically. Emotionally, how are they?”
The mech hums. “Skywarp, Thundercracker: mourning their trine leader. Hurting. Seekers: mourning their Commander.”
Of course the other seekers are also in mourning. Starscream led the revolution in Vos; he liberated the seekers in the flying city and snuffed out the Winglord’s spark himself. The seekers may not seem very respectful of him to outsiders, but Starscream knows better. Frag, he needs to see them. He needs to show them that he is fine -- that he will always be fine, apparently.
Starscream makes to get out of the bed, and everyone’s optics are on him again.
“What?” he asks. “I’m fine, aren’t I? There’s people I need to see. A bond I need to forge again. You people know how these things go, right?”
“If you’re feeling well, there’s nothing keeping you here,” Ratchet agrees. “You’re free from any tasks for three days, and you’re supposed to come check in everyday. You were declared dead five hours ago, after all.”
Starscream nods, and gets up. “Does anyone know where my trine is right now?” he asks, obviously addressing Soundwave only.
“All seekers: currently in air barracks,” the mech provides. “Emotional state: fragile. Seeing Starscream alive and well: helpful.”
“Thank you, Soundwave, love it when you use your evil powers for good.”
“Knowledge of everyone’s location: not an evil power. Simply useful information.”
“Yeah, yeah.”
With that, Starscream leaves the medbay. He has his seekers to cheer up, he has his trine to trine up with again, and he has an entire base of people to show that frag yeah, Starscream of Vos cannot be killed -- by Autobots, by Megatron, by Quintessons, or by whatever force of evil the universe throws at him.