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Hunting Season.

Summary:

Now that he’s taking a more active role in Charlie’s life, Lucifer decides to help his daughter out.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

The streets of Hell were often predictable in their depravity. Some of the worst sinners would prowl the night, ready to get meagre pleasures from killing strangers on the street.

Valentino didn’t care much for what the lowly civilians did in their off time unless they worked for him. If they consumed his products, he was satisfied.

His limousine stopped in its tracks, Val growling as he shouted for an explanation from his driver.

”Sir, it seems that someone wants to see you?”

”Run them over,” Val ordered snappily.

”I can’t, sir.”

Valentino exited his limousine to find a man dressed in primarily white and gold standing in front of him.

”I’m busy,” Val growled out, trying to intimidate the figure away only to be shoved back by the smaller man.

The man planted his cane, topped with an apple accessory.

”Oh, you need an introduction. I’m Lucifer Morningstar. King of Hell and father of one Charlie Morningstar.”

Valentino went wide eyed. Surely that little runt hadn’t gone to her papito for help?

”What about it?”

”See, you messed with my daughter, and I am not going to let that slide.”

Val began to back away. The limousine wouldn’t be the best call here.

”Your majesty, I can explain.”

Lucifer strolled forward with a casual air to his movements.

”Come on, I’m feeling kind. You have a twenty second head start.”

Val unfolded his wings and began to fly away from Lucifer faster than ever before. He was not going to die here.

Unbeknownst to him, Lucifer pulled out his phone when Val started flying away and contacted Alastor. 

“Do you have a clear shot?”


Alastor tested the rifle’s weight in his hands. An elegant pleasure, hunting. But this was not for a feeling of superiority or consumption. It was simply for fun and entertainment.

He looked down the sights. Seeing his target flying for dear life. A clear shot. Alastor pulled the trigger, and watched as Valentino fell to the pavement, his face scraping against the hard floor.

Alastor used one of his dark magic tentacles to lift his phone to his ear.

”Target is down. Shall I fire again?”

”Shoot his other wings. I want him to stay grounded.”

Alastor grinned wider. Maybe there was something to enjoy about Lucifer after all.

He fired three more shots into Valentino’s wings, and one more at Val’s face for good measure.

Now, it was time to enjoy the show.


It was only now, strolling up with his cane in hand, that he realised how pathetic Valentino was. 

Lucifer rolled Valentino over so that the overlord could face his punishment with his own eyes. Valentino’s face was pulling itself back together, albeit slowly.

”You think you can mess with me…?” Val slurred out. He struggled to get to his feet, Lucifer watching sternly.

”The Vee’s are gonna know about this, and they’re going to slaughter every fucking loser in that hotel…”

The king of hell then summoned a shotgun loaded with angelic ammunition, and proceeded to fire at Valentino without a second thought.

Val collapsed to the floor, groaning in pain as the holy ammunition burned his skin. Lucifer cocked the shotgun, preparing to unleash his fury.

“Bold words for someone about to die.”

Lucifer unloaded the shotgun at Valentino’s face and chest, not even noticing when the sounds of pain grew quieter.

When the gun clicked with a lack of ammunition, Lucifer instead brandished the shotgun like a bat and smashed it against Val’s face with striking ferocity. He swung so hard that it broke in half, clattering against the pavement.

It was only then that Lucifer finally snapped out of his paternal state of rage. The main mission was accomplished, and in quite a brutal fashion.

Then again, Lucifer hardly felt bad about it. Quite the opposite.

He then looked at Val’s mangled corpse and called Alastor again.

”He’s done. Now for your part of the job.”


Charlie took a long sip of morning coffee. A pleasurable morning ritual, although she hardly needed it to be buzzing with excited energy in the morning.

Now that everyone was awake, they were waiting for the news.

Angel stepped down the stairs with a strange sense of lightheartedness to his movement.

“Someone’s refreshed,” Husk remarked as he rubbed a cloth inside a dirty glass. Angel shrugged casually, stretching his upper arms over his head before lying over on the couch

”Must be my beauty routine.”

Vaggie rolled her eyes, turning on the news station before being taken by shock at what was awaiting her vision.

”Eye witnesses have reported the Overlord Valentino’s mangiest body hung up outside one of the Vee’s compounds. We have no information of the perpetrators, but we will keep you updated.”

Val’s body was almost unrecognisable if not for the large wings that looked punctured with bullets. But even so, it suddenly explained Angel’s refreshed attitude.

Cherri cheered, wrapping Angel in a friendly headlock.

”How about that?”

Charlie slowly looked to Alastor in the corner, his smile looking a tad more genuine than usual.

”Alastor, do you know anything about this?”

Alastor chuckled.

“Come now, I was out running important errands in Cannibal Town.”

Lucifer burst out of the kitchen holding an almost comically large stack of pancakes. Ironically for hell, yet fitting for his history, his pancakes were absolutely divine in their taste.

”Eyes away from the tv, who wants pancakes?”

The result was a unanimous yes. Charlie decided to brush her concerns away for the time being. Angel did look pretty happy, and besides…

Isn’t that what the Hotel was about?

Notes:

Don’t you love seeing Val get his shit pushed in? I do.
Comments are welcome and appreciated.