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Dakota is missing something.
He’d come back to New Haven and found his friends. Both of them, alive and well– not like he wasn’t expecting it, they’d been fine when he’d left, but he hadn’t expected them to be like… this .
It’s not bad. Well, it is bad. They’d lied to him, William had lied to him, and he’d been so angry he’d cried. Vyncent had lied too, lied for so much longer, but somehow William’s betrayal had stung more. It wasn’t just the lies. It was the fact that the whole time he’d been back, Dakota had felt like something was off.
Before, when they’d been fighting crime almost ten months ago, they’d worked as a trio. They’d bantered and fought and the balance between them had been equal. Dakota had liked it. He had finally felt like he’d belonged, like he’d had a family. They were his family, unequivocally. He loved them– loves them. He still does, even now, when everything is weird and bad and confusing. Ever since he’d gotten back to New Haven he hadn’t gotten a real break, no time to think about what was going on. His emotions had piled up like logs in a beaver’s dam, and it was only a matter of time until it flooded.
They’d talked it out. Sitting in the dark of the Defender’s Hall, all three of them listening to the rain on the windows. They’d apologized. And Dakota had decided then, in the quiet, listening to both of them breathe over the sounds of everything else, that he would try to trust them again.
It wasn’t easy, though. And something was still weird.
He couldn’t put a finger on it. Every time he tried, the thought flitted away like a butterfly. Any attempt to catch it left him breathless and confused, lost in the woods. At some point he sat down and really thought it over, tried to pin down exactly what was bothering him. He had sat and stared at the whitewashed wall of the Hall and thought, for about four hours straight.
And that’s when it hit him.
Vyncent and William. They’re closer– it’s not unsurprising, Dakota had been gone for ten months. They’d spent that time training together and spending nearly every moment in each other’s space. Of course they’d be closer than when he left. It hurts, a little, but Dakota knows that just because they’re closer doesn’t mean they don’t care for him any less. But the thing is– and give him a minute, he needs to really mull it over– something about the closeness is different.
Dakota’s friendship with William is like nothing he’s ever had before. They’re basically brothers, love pouring between them with casual touch and comfortable silence. William is his rock, sturdy and strong. He gives out orders and Dakota listens, for the most part, when it suits him. He knows William is smarter than him and he’s willing to follow along, as long as they’re honest with each other. Dakota thinks without William he’d be more lost than ever, floating in circles in space with no direction.
Vyncent is more distant. It’s easier to be goofy around Vyncent, their energy feeding each other. Dakota knows that whatever he does, Vyncent will grin and go along if it’s funny, and he never complains whenever Dakota pulls a stupid prank on him. If William’s his rock, then Vyncent’s his stream, going along with the flow. Cool, refreshing. Somewhere to sit on a sunny day to watch the sun glisten off his current. Dakota loves Vynce, loves him like a brother, the same kind of love he feels for William.
And they–
They’re–
They’re weird .
Something’s weird! Ever since he got back, they’ve been either as thick as thieves or skirting around each other like if they so much as touch a bomb will go off. Dakota realizes it, sitting in the Defender’s Hall and staring at nothing. They’re both the closest and the farthest away from each other he’s ever seen them. They share knowing glances, staring at each other while they think no one’s looking. When they fight, they work in unison unconsciously. They are constantly on the same page, but between the lines of text is something more. Dakota is ninety-eight point nine percent of the way there. He knows something is going on with them– they must’ve fought, he thinks. William must still be mad about the amulet and Mal. And while it’s not coming between them in any significant way, the tension is present. Dakota can feel the strain in the air.
After his thinking session, it’s not hard to hunt down William. He’s in the study, staring down at the pages from Ashe’s notebook. They’re laid out on the floor and a wisp burns above them, lighting them in a soft blue glow. William’s back is to him, chin supported by one hand as he just stares absently at the paper. Dakota’s fists clench by his sides, but that’s not why he’s here.
“Hey,” he says, plopping down on the floor across from William. “I got a question for you.”
“Hmm?” William asks, barely glancing up at him. Then he seems to register Dakota’s presence, and he glances up. In the ten months Dakota was gone, his hair got longer, more shaggy. The white streaking through it seems noticeably more prominent. He looks older. Dakota knows he looks different too, but seeing it on William is weird. All of this is weird. He shoves the thoughts away and tries to focus.
“What is it, Dakota?” William asks. He’s been silent for too long. Crap!
“Did something happen between you and Vynce?” he asks bluntly. William blinks, and then his face flushes deeply.
“What?” he asks, stuttering over his words slightly. “What– I mean, something like… like what? What do you mean?”
“Did something happen?” Dakota presses, leaning forward. William leans back, eyes wide. Hmm. This is suspicious. He knew he was onto something. “Something with you guys? ‘Cause I got back, and I know we already talked about this but there’s something goin’ on, I can tell. I’m not olib– oblivious, not as oblivious as you think. Is it the thing with Mal? Are you still angry?”
William blinks a few times, his face going back to it’s normal color (mostly). That’s a good sign. Dakota keeps staring at him, watching as William’s mouth shapes around words silently for a moment before settling on, “I mean, yeah. I guess I’m still mad.”
“Have you talked to him about it?”
“A little.” William raises a hand, scratches at the back of his head. “Dakota, look, it’s not– it’s not what I’m focusing on right now, okay?”
“Yeah, yeah,” Dakota says, because that’s bullshit if he’s ever heard it. “Don’t lie to me again, Will-I-Am. I know something’s weird between you guys, and if we’re gonna be trustin’ each other, you gotta talk it out.”
“It’s not the amulet,” William says firmly, reaching out to push Dakota back by his shoulder. Dakota goes, watching him with narrowed eyes. William is blushing again, just a little. He glances over his shoulder at the door, then back at Dakota and sighs. “Look. I’m going to tell you something, but don’t– don’t get weird, okay? Don’t freak out.”
“Why would I freak out?” Dakota asks. Then, the worst materializes in his mind. “Did you lie to me again!?”
“No!” William says quickly. “No, I just– it’s just– hard to talk about. While you were gone, Dakota, Vynce and I… well, we hung out every day, and got close, and you always tease us about– well– okay–” He’s stuttering again, struggling to get through the words. Dakota frowns, pressing his lips together and giving him time. He can always give William time, even if the uncertainty is killing him.
“You always tease us,” William says quietly, not looking at him. He drops his hand from Dakota’s shoulder. “Or me, at least. And– we haven’t talked about it since it happened. But um. We. Or– I, I guess, I kissed Vynce.”
Dakota’s brain turns to mush. Everything in the world stops, revolving around them both, frozen in time. Even his breath catches in his chest. William looks pained and Dakota feels, strangely, betrayed . Again.
“You kissed?” he asks, and time starts back up.
“Just once,” William says quietly, fingers twisting in his lap. “It was– we were having a rough week, and we were kind of taking it out on each other back in the old HQ, where we were hiding out, and it just kind of… happened.” Dakota scours him for the truth, and finds that William is being entirely honest. He’s bashful, not making eye contact, but honest. “We haven’t really talked about it, like I said.”
“Nothing?” Dakota asks, once he manages to pick his jaw up off the floor. “Wait, months ago? You guys kissed months ago and haven’t talked since?”
“I mean we talk!” William says hurriedly. “We talk, just– not about– that.”
“You kissed,” Dakota says, sitting back on his haunches. His mind reels. This is not what he was expecting. “Huh.”
“I’m sorry if we’re being weird about it,” William says. “It’s not– not on purpose.”
“No, this makes sense,” Dakota says, leaning back and running a hand through his hair. The betrayal fades, for the most part, but he still feels slightly weird. “I was just too stupid to figure it out on my own.”
“You’re not stupid,” William says. “Ok, well– maybe a little. But this wasn’t– okay, well it must’ve been kind of easy to see if you got the vibes, but still, I guess– was I really being that obvious?”
Dakota thinks back over it. “Mmm, yeah. You more than Vynce. For sure.”
“Ohh, god,” William moans, running his hands down his face and hiding it. Dakota cracks a grin.
“So…” he says, dragging the word out as delight sparks in his brain. He smiles– not putting his whole chest into it, but it’s a smile. William seems to take it at face value, at least. “You down bad?”
“Stop,” William says, smiling back at him and reaching out to shove his shoulder. “Dude, just don’t.”
“C’mon,” Dakota says lightly. “Can’t I tease my best friend for being in loooove?”
“Don’t call it that,” William says, rolling his eyes.
“Love,” Dakota says, then jumps into a crouch and spins in a circle chanting, “Love, love, love, love–”
“Dakota!” William is still smiling, laughing a little now. Dakota stops, his chest feeling weirdly full. Not happy, but not sad, either. Somewhere in between. He crawls forward like a frog until he’s right up in William’s face, letting their breaths mingle. William raises an eyebrow at him, and Dakota studies his face with all his might. He doesn’t know why he’s doing this. He just needs to move. He needs to see. He needs to be close to William.
“I love you,” he says impulsively.
“I love you too, Dakota,” William says. He looks weird. Constipated. “And– you know you’re my best friend, right? And I love you even if– even if with Vynce it’s– different?”
Dakota doesn’t really get it, the difference here. But William said it back, so he guesses he can take it.
“Sure,” he says. He’s still crouching up in William’s face, close enough to kiss him if he wanted to. He doesn’t, but he could. “So,” he says. “You gonna kiss Vynce again?”
“Dakota–”
“You ever think about it?”
“Kota!”
“I can tell him you think about it, if you want.”
“Dakota, no, that’s so weird.”
“You’re weird!” Dakota flops back onto his ass, then lies down fully, staring at the ceiling of the study. “Everything’s just been so weird.”
William sighs. “Yeah,” he says, out of Dakota’s range of vision. He can hear the shuffling of papers, then clothing, and then William is lying down right next to him. “You can say that again.”
“I just don’t want–” Dakota stops, giving his brain time to think. He closes his eyes, forces himself to breath, forces himself to slow down. The minute ticks by. William waits. “I just don’t want things to change,” Dakota finally says, parsing out meaning from the aches and pains in his heart. “I like being with– with you guys. You’re my friends. And if something happened between you and Vynce and you guys were in love or something, I guess I just– I don’t want it to change us.”
“Nothing will change us, Dakota,” William says. Then he sighs again. “Okay, well, maybe it will. But it doesn’t have to be a bad change. And honestly, I don’t– I don’t plan on talking to Vynce about it any time soon.” He goes quiet. A second later, Dakota feels Will’s fingers curl around his own. He squeezes the cool flesh tight. “We have other things to worry about.”
“Would it–” Dakota’s heart squeezes. He makes sure his grip on William’s hand isn’t too tight, and makes his heartbeat slow. “Would it make you happy?”
“Would what make me happy?”
“Being with Vynce?”
William is quiet. The silence seeps into the air around them, but it’s not tense. Just quiet.
“I don’t know,” William says softly after a few minutes. “Look, Kota– I don’t want to think about it. Can we stop talking about it?”
“Okay, sure,” Dakota says, because he’s not cruel. “As long as you promise you’re not not-telling me anything else.”
“I promise,” William says, sounding exhausted.
They both go quiet. Dakota’s mind is still swirling, full of emotion and disjointed thoughts, but William’s presence is calming him down, making it easier to just lie in silence. The satisfaction of figuring out the mysterious tension is nice, even if some of the other emotions coming with it aren't so nice. At least here, it’s calm. It’s quiet in the Defender’s Hall, but if he tries he can hear the faint sounds of Vyncent talking to himself in the vicinity of the living room, voice too faint to make out any words. The back of his eyelids are a pleasant, dark pink, and he traces starbursts of light across them. His hand is still in William’s, and the cool press of his skin is easy to focus on, fingers curled together and pressed palm to palm.