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“It’s warm.” They’re lying down on the floor
together, bodies stretched along the carpet, clothes discarded just to feel each other and limbs so close the heat radiates; it weaves in and out to hover between the empty space: gaps between fingers, slightly smaller ones between toes. It’s everywhere. Hot all over. Zhang Hao continues, shifting positions ever so gently, “It’s warm but I don’t really mind,” His eyes slide over to meet Hanbin’s who is of course already looking at him. The prolonged eye contact giving him butterflies, “It feels like our energies are connected or something. Like as if your aura is comfortable in the presence of mine.”
At that Hanbin let’s out a breathy laugh, his head thrown back, eyes closed in delight and whisker dimples on display. “That’s probably ‘cus it is.” Zhang Hao sends a look his way, subtle curiosity breaking the surface as he opens his mouth to add an input. But how do you know? He’s not quite quick enough. Hanbin knows him too well. “Gege you can’t just,” -Hanbin takes a pause to collect his thoughts. Zhang Hao could watch him do so forever he thinks, “say something so dramatically profound and then try to question me for having no proof to back it up okay?”
The carpet underneath shuffles when Hanbin does and suddenly he’s invading Zhang Hao’s personal space, body suspended over his and arms hauling himself up as to not crush his lover. Not that it wouldn’t be welcomed, a thought that flows through Hao’s mind often.
“Okay hyung?” The voice above him is adamant for an agreement. Zhang Hao is head-butted softly, and the wide round eyes that stare back at him ever so sincere for a conversation centring around ever expanding spirituality makes it kind of funny. Hanbin is just too cute he can’t help but laugh at him a little, shoulders shaking. He covers it up with a kiss - chaste but never any less honeyed.
“For one Bin-ah,” Hao starts listing away. It was inevitable at this point. Sometimes he doesn’t have anything to say but around Hanbin words just don’t stop. Won’t stop. “ I always feel comfortable with you and around you and hearing of you and all the other scenarios in which I have anything to do with you.”
He can feel the smile Hanbin forms on his collarbone, where his boyfriend has changed positions yet again, nestled into his chest this time.
“Well…,” Hanbin gears up for a rebuttal. Zhang Hao’s eye roll is endearing, them both knowing he’ll appease whatever hypothetical question comes out of Hanbin’s mouth. “What about the scenarios in which you don’t have anything to do with me?” Zhang Hao tightens his grip on Hanbin’s lower back. “Not a possibility.” It’s said with such lightning speed and with even more certainty that if it were anyone else Zhang Hao might’ve been embarrassed.
Kisses are peppered onto his upper jaw, followed by a tiny nip making him hiss. “Cat.”
A minuscule “creep” uttered back by Hanbin who’s clearly feeling satiated below him makes a small drowsy smile tug at Zhang Hao’s lips; the petty name call filled with so much fondness causes his diaphragm to bubble up, overflowing with so much love that he might just vomit up his heart and happily give it away on a silver platter.
Hanbin sits up with so much swiftness, it startles Zhang Hao. His cheeks are starting to flush a rosy shade of pink, his ears a ruby red and Zhang Hao wants to melt .
“What?” He looks up at his lover, eyebrows creasing because why is Hanbin making that face?
He shuffles to get away. “Alright, you’re kinda scaring me get off,” he starts to wiggle his hips hoping to tip the boy off of his lap. Hanbin giggles to himself and Zhang Hao’s had enough this is so unserious. “Literally, Hanbin what?” His words come out as a sigh, barely any force behind them as Hanbin advances, wrapping his arms around Zhang Hao’s neck.
“Did you see your face just then?” Is the reply he’s met with. Zhang Hao can’t believe him sometimes.
“Well obviously not if it’s my own face—”, hes cut off.
“You should’ve seen your face just then..then,” Hanbin corrects himself, he sticks his tongue out too. What a child . The only correct response is to, in turn, also stick his own tongue out. They touch. Hanbin pulls back. “You love me so much.” Is the next thing he says, eyes peering down, and somewhat smugly too. Zhang Hao is caught off guard. He feels a bit shy.
“Like yes, I know you love me,” Hanbin elaborates, “and you tell me whenever you have the chance and I appreciate that and it makes me feel so reassured and safe and happy. But just then when I saw your face and you were so carefree and all your walls were down and you were just, I don’t know..being! When you were just there, I saw it so full force and unconditional and I can’t help but feel very lucky.” All hints of playfulness gone from his face and Zhang Hao knows Hanbin will start tearing up in a moment and if that happens he’ll simply have no choice other than to follow suit.
Hanbin presses himself right up against Hao. Their bare bodies intertwined. One ‘supernatural’ entity. One soul .
“Hyung-ah, you know I love you too right?” Hanbin goes on before Zhang Hao can give him any verbal confirmation, so instead he squeezes his hand. Hard. A squeeze in equal force greets him back.
“You’re so special to me. I haven’t felt like this ever gege, you’re truly the first.”
Hanbin swallows, gripping Hao nearer so that he knows, pressing their bodies even closer so that he knows, moulding their hearts into one another so he that knows; and Zhang Hao does know. Always has. Their mouths mould together too. Lips sharing unspoken words, feeling transcended through pace and touch, saliva exchanging parts of each other they so desperately wish to share.
I’m so glad I found you. I’m so glad you found me. Let us never be apart. Let’s do everything together. Be with me always.
When they pull away, far enough to catch their breath, compact enough to still be in each other’s orbit. Zhang Hao grins at Hanbin all teeth, all apple cheeks, full of light. “Me too Bin-ah, me too.” Sung Hanbin grins back just the same.