Chapter Text
Three days after bringing Jason home and the morning after he was officially released from hospital with a diagnosis of a catastrophic frontal, temporal and parietal TBI, Bruce Wayne ‘contributed what he could’ to help solve the case of how Jason had been kidnapped and received the injuries he had, not that all of this was a carefully laid out cover up to hide the fact that they’d found the first case of spontaneous resuscitation after several months among H. sapiens. Jason contributed absolutely nothing to the case, deciding he did not want to talk to the police or be examined and was generally a nightmare for them. Bruce was however definitely relieved to know that Jason would not tolerate unwanted touch from strangers. “Good job,” he told him quietly when he ran to him because the officer tried to lift his shirt to look at his scars. The officer approached again and Bruce said, “You’re scaring him,” already disturbed that that wasn’t somehow obvious.
“Bye,” Jason said, all of the second time Bruce had heard him use that word since he’d found him.
“I desperately want to find out what happened,” Bruce said. “But not if it just gives Jason more trauma. He's been through enough."
“Mr Wayne, your son was a victim of an extremely serious crime.”
“I know, which is why I want to do what’s best for his recovery. There are superheroes on the case. Why do you need help from a child with a brain injury?” He led Jason out of the station.
Once they were in the car, he said, “One thing left to go.”
“Bye,” Jason whinged.
“I know, it’s a lot,” Bruce said. “But things will calm down soon.”
“Yeah,” Jason murmured.
“You are doing exceptionally well,” Bruce told him. The whole situation would be immensely stressful for anyone, let alone someone who still didn’t quite grasp what had happened.
Jason smiled a little, chewing at his necklace. After a long pause where he glanced around their surroundings, staring down some passersby, he stared at the steering wheel and uttered, “Car.”
“Yeah, we’re in a car,” Bruce agreed.
Jason glowered.
Jason seemed to use “Bye” to mean “Go away”, “Dad” could mean both Bruce and “I need reassurance right now”, he tried to think of what else “car” could mean, they used cars to drive away from places. “Do you want to go back to the penthouse?”
Jason shrugged and Bruce took that as a sign he at least wanted to leave here. They drove off.
When they returned to the penthouse, Alfred set Jason up with a grazing platter before going back to picking out wallpapers and flooring for the rebuilding of the manor. In the meantime, Bruce found himself grazing too as he searched for speech therapists. Gotham Academy had informed him not long after the reveal that Jason was still alive that Jason would still have a place at the school regardless, and that the school did specialist education up until the age of twenty-two. From the brief time Dick had had occupational therapy to help with focussing in class, Bruce was aware that their OTs were good at their job. This meant he was currently negotiating re-enrolling Jason in the school for occupational therapy, and nothing else, at least for the time being.
Jason pointedly bit down on a pretzel and looked around the room. None of them had ever been good at being idle. Bruce needed something for Jason to do that he could easily distract him from again later but that he could also do with minimal assistance.
Watching TV was an option but it felt more than a bit disengaged. He didn’t want to give him a chore because for one that felt unfair, two that would still require a lot of supervision and three he wanted him to be able to continue to eat as he did whatever he did. “Do you want to make a list of books you want for your new room?” Bruce asked.
Jason wanted any and all books Bruce suggested, this resulted in them adding a stunning but massive collection of clothbound classics to the list, a variety of different books on space and natural history, a lot of the best sellers, and a lot of books Jason thought looked good based on the covers. Bruce guessed they could go out and buy them in person once the manor was rebuilt. They were just getting onto some graphic novels and manga when Clark called asking to be let in. Since news of Jason’s return two days ago, reporters had been clamouring outside the penthouse to try and get a picture of him. Thus far sneaking the least flashy car in and out of the garage had let them avoid any of that but Bruce hoped that giving the Daily Planet the exclusive report would help a little more. “Clark’s here,” he told Jason.
Jason smiled in response.
Clark came in with Lois, Alfred immediately taking coats and offering refreshments. Bruce noticed that Jason was under the table now, watching their legs and eating crackers. He’d asked for Lois and Clark because he trusted them to roll with whatever made Jason comfortable as well as the fact there was no risk of identities being revealed. “Ma told me to bring her apple pie,” Clark said, holding out a casserole dish and settling it on the kitchen unit. He then pulled out a crochet rainbow blanket from his satchel, “She also made this for Jason.”
Bruce noticed that Jason was definitely looking at them now. He also seemed slightly nervous. Bruce was starting to notice that as comfortably indifferent as he was with strangers while wearing his Robin mask, he was a lot more anxious without it.
Bruce smiled at him and mouthed, “It’s okay.”
Jason emerged from under the table with a handful of chorizo, walking over to the blanket.
“It’s good to see you again, Jason,” Lois commented.
Jason immediately shuffled into Bruce’s reach.
Bruce hugged him, trying to provide some level of reassurance, “Do you remember Lois?” he asked. “She’s a reporter and she’s a good person.” He promised, “She’s here to talk to us about what happened with you.”
Jason hummed and glanced at her again, Bruce guessed she was one of the patchier memories. “Cool?” he squeaked.
“I think she’s pretty swell,” Clark said, looking immensely fond of his wife.
“Alright Smallville,” Lois smirked back. “You don’t have to talk to me if you don’t want to Jason, all of this is up to you. And if you decide mid-conversation that you’re done, we’re done.”
Jason nodded.
“And I promise the questions won’t be too bad,” she added.
“Cool.”
“Cool,” Lois echoed.
Getting Jason to stand still for a photograph was a little bit difficult. He didn’t really understand what was going on, but eventually he was stood still and looking anxiously at Clark’s camera. “Smile,” Bruce told him.
Jason just looked even more confused in response.
Clark pointed his fingers at the side of his head in a shoddy expression of Batman, “I am vengeance! I am the night! Fear me!” he growled.
Jason immediately burst into laughter, Bruce smiling for the photo before realising Jason was still giggling.
“It’s not that funny,” he told him.
Jason did not care for his opinion apparently.
After the photo op, Bruce ended up on one of the living room sofas with Jason sat next to him, tangling himself up further in the blanket that Martha Kent had gifted him. “So, Jason, what’s it like being home?” Lois asked.
Jason whined. He didn’t consider the penthouse home.
“We’re not back at the manor yet,” Bruce explained.
“Ah,” Lois rephrased the question, “What’s it like being back with your family?”
Jason leaned into Bruce’s side, “Cool.” He promptly ran off and Bruce hoped that wasn’t quite the end of the interview with Jason.
“Off the record, how are you holding up?” Clark asked.
“I buried my son and he came back,” Bruce answered. There was nothing in the world that could make that a bad thing.
Clark smiled slightly, “Even if this isn’t the manor, he seems delighted to be here.”
Bruce nodded, “We’re still working out what actually happened while he was missing but what we do know is worrying. I just want him to know he’s safe and loved.”
“I think he knows,” Lois said before Jason pulled Alfred into the room, sitting him on the sofa next to him before trying to loop both him and Bruce into a hug.
Considering Bruce was somewhat broader than Jason’s arm length, this did not quite go as planned for the teenager and Bruce tugged him into a hug instead. “Jason says a lot through tactile communication these days.”
Jason tilted his head in confusion.
“You can lead people to things you want, you like hugs,” Bruce explained for him. “And biting your brother.” Dick had informed him to be aware that it turned out Jason had a habit of biting and scratching when he wasn’t getting his way.
Jason laughed. Bruce really needed to teach him that biting people’s hands was unhygienic.
“How did you feel when you found out Jason was alive?” Clark asked.
Bruce looked at his kid. “I didn’t believe it at first. I was questioning my own sanity but getting him back was the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
Jason seemed anxious when Bruce looked to him again, chewing on the blanket and fidgeting worriedly.
“You okay, lad?” He asked him.
Jason nodded enthusiastically and hummed to himself. He started vocalising to himself, Bruce realising after a moment that he was repeating “You okay, lad?” back to himself over and over again.
Jason had echoed phrases at least a few times, normally because he was confused or because he wanted to reciprocate the meaning. This time it seemed to be a form of self-regulation. Clark, Lois and Alfred were both looking a bit concerned too. “It’s been a long day,” Bruce explained.
Jason still looked distressed about something even if he was fake smiling. Dick had said that the anxiety attack Jason had at the Tower was triggered by mention of his death. Lilith had also reported that Jason was very defensive and in a lot of denial when his brain injuries were brought up. While there was definite physical trauma to Jason’s brain, Bruce was once again wondering if some of his current behaviours didn’t have more to do with psychological trauma.
“Let’s go for a walk,” Bruce said to Jason.
Jason nodded.
After getting Jason bundled up in a coat, they went out to the balcony, Bruce keeping a hand on Jason so he didn’t either try to jump the fence or leap in the pool which was currently ideal for cold water swimming and not ideal for seventeen-year-olds to risk drowning their selves in. “We’re not swimming right now,” Bruce told Jason.
Jason whined.
“Okay,” Bruce was going to have to demonstrate this. He sat down by the water’s edge and plunged his hand into it.
Jason did the same and jerked backwards.
“It’s cold, right?” Bruce asked, modelling the sign at the same time.
Jason nodded, then stared sadly at the water.
“Once we’re back at the manor, we’ll get a heated indoor pool,” Bruce told him. “Means we’ll be able to go swimming in any weather.”
Jason smiled slightly at that, hand inching for the water and splashing it before pulling away again.
There was another conversation Bruce wanted to have with Jason. He knew Jason wanted to go to school again but for a lot of different reasons, Bruce really thought it would be better if he was homeschooled, going to occupational and speech therapy a few times a week, and physio depending on what the end verdict was with his hip and hands. “What do you think about school where I’m your teacher?” Jason had effectively been homeschooled as Robin too, going to the actual physical place had mostly been for socialising and to maintain appearances.
Jason looked deeply reluctant.
“You’d have a big say in the curriculum,” Bruce offered. He’d already made some plans, but he wanted to make sure Jason had as much autonomy as was safe.
“Dad,” Jason looked utterly lost.
It was always difficult to know what Jason did or didn’t understand, even more so when that varied a lot from situation to situation. “Can you show me what’s wrong?” Bruce asked.
Jason gestured to himself.
“Do you hurt anywhere?” Bruce asked. Jason still hadn’t shown the ability to answer that question but it was worth a try.
Jason just curled on himself in response.
“Can’t find your words right now?” Bruce asked.
Jason nodded, bursting him into tears.
Bruce gently picked him up and moved him away from the pool, hugging him with the motion. Jason shook his head and wailed harder when Bruce was about to carry him inside, and Bruce had a feeling that everyone on the other side of the one-way glass was giving him concerned looks. He didn’t know why Jason was upset and if it had something to do with pain or frustration, he was terrified that something was physically majorly wrong, that Jason was suddenly going to die in his arms for a second time. He pulled at a little thread in his thoughts, the anchoring of a psychic link normally closed. “J’onn, I need your help. Jason’s crying and I don’t know why,” and despite having raised two children, Bruce currently felt far too much like a first-time parent. He was still working out how to interpret different cries and whimpers and he was terrified he was going to do something wrong and hurt his son further.
“I’m on my way, Bruce,” J’onn promised.
Jason was still wailing when a pigeon landed on the balcony and turned into John Jones. Bruce was relieved he was in human form, he wasn’t sure how Jason would cope with someone who was visibly not human right now. Apparently even Cyborg had been a little bit intimidating for him.
J’onn was quiet for a long moment then said, “Jason’s willing to let me connect your to his thoughts.”
Bruce agreed to that too and suddenly he was hit by a wave of images and sensations and feelings that translated to “I want to go home, I want to go home, why aren’t we going home and why is everything in ruins and why didn’t you find me when I was lost and alone and scared and hungry and I’m scared and confused and mad and I can’t find my words and I don’t know why they’re gone, I don’t know why they left. There was green hair and laughter and it hurt and it hurt even more when I was blown to pieces and when I clawed my way out of my own grave. Not thinking about that! I’m fine. Everything’s fine. I’m fine. I’m Robin. Robin gives me magic. I’m okay. We’re going to go home and we’ll find my words and everything’s going to be okay. It’s all okay. It’s great. I have my family and food and shelter and warmth and everything’s okay.”
Bruce had to fight to find himself in the wave of thoughts and feelings. This was the danger of psychic links. Even with J’onn paying full attention and Bruce being used to resisting psychic attacks, Jason had no sense of mental boundaries putting Bruce at risk of damage if he didn’t carefully maintain his own shielding, forcing him to lose awareness of the outside world just to stay focussed. That said, right now he didn’t care provided he could calm Jason down. “We’ll be going home soon,” he told him. “The manor’s in the process of being rebuilt and we’ll be going home when it’s built. There was an earthquake that destroyed most of Gotham, including the manor, which is why everything’s in ruin. The city was declared a No Man’s Land, no one was allowed in or out until a few days ago. Which is why it’s still in ruins. I’m so sorry I didn’t find you. I didn’t know you were alive-”
Worry. “I’m alive. I’m fine. I’m okay. I’m alive.”
Dread. “You are alive, Jason. But you died and woke up in your own grave. I didn’t know this until I found you or I would have been there so much sooner.”
Fear. Fear. Hysterical denial. “I didn’t die. I’m here. I’m alive. Robin gives me magic! Robin never dies.”
“I know It’s hard to believe but you got better. We don’t know how yet but you got better. Maybe that was Robin’s magic?” As hard as that was for Bruce to believe.
“I don’t want to be dead. I’m scared. I don’t like this. Why do you keep lying to me?”
“I’m not, but we can drop the topic for now,” even if Bruce would have liked to talk about it while he knew what Jason was thinking. “As for your words, you had what we call a brain injury. Your brain’s tried to heal around it but it doesn’t look like a typical brain anymore. This might make speaking and understanding language hard, you might regain the skills or you might not or you might regain some but not all.”
“What am I gonna do if I can’t talk?”
“We’ll find other ways to communicate, there are picture-based forms of communication we can try. You already say a lot through your expressions and your actions and your vocalisations. You’re alive, we can work everything else out.”
“What about school? I don’t remember much about school aside from the fact I love it and people would ask me questions and I’d answer them. I’d get praise for it and I liked getting praise for it. I could be great at school while my best was only ever okay for you.”
Bruce ducked out of the bond a moment, trying to think how to phrase this. He didn’t want to tell him that the bar had suddenly shifted dramatically, that while Robin needed to be perfect so he wouldn’t die, like that had worked, anything new Jason learnt would be a win. “If you went to school at the moment, it would be very different to what you’re used to. And I’m worried because at the moment you need a lot of support and I worry you wouldn’t be able to tell me if you weren’t receiving that support and that someone could hurt you, that even if you can tell me, they’d assume you couldn’t. I’m also worried that you wouldn’t cope with strangers helping you with everything you need help with. Combined with the fact that you’re probably going to have several surgeries in the next few days, it just doesn’t seem right for you to go back right now.”
“That isn’t school. School is good, school is good and I’m good at school. Why can’t I go back to school?”
“Because there’s too many risks. There are some very bad people like the League of Assassins or the Riddler who’d see you as an easy target to use to get to me. They might also hurt the other people at your school to get to you,” part of Robin’s safety relied on the fact that the risks always outweighed the rewards. That wouldn’t be the case with a Jason who couldn’t defend himself. “I promise in school with me, we’ll still have questions for you to answer and you’ll be good at it.”
“I’m still not sure about it. But maybe it will be okay?”
“With homeschooling, another great thing is we can make big adjustments whenever we need to. Everything can be tailored around you.”
“Will I be able to go back to school when I can talk again? I want to go back and I want… I’m alone a lot at school but I have some friends, I think they’re friends, I can’t remember much about them, but they make me happy. And I want to hang out with them and will I be able to do that when I can talk again?”
Bruce was aware that a huge number of connections tended to fade with traumatic brain injuries, he just hoped Jason’s friends from theatre tech would stick around. “You’ll be going into your senior year in September so it’s unlikely that you’ll be back in school before you graduate. That said, we can get in contact with your friends and you can hang out with them outside of school if you want.”
“That sounds okay. I’d still rather be in school but if homeschooling is going to be fun, then I’m okay with that.”
“We’ll do homeschooling then, at least for a little while.” Bruce knew they needed to cut the connection, that right now neither him nor Jason were paying anywhere near enough attention to what was going on in the world outside and that keeping the connection for much longer would risk their minds blurring or other terrible consequences. That said, he’d missed being able to just talk with his son and know what he was thinking. “We’re going to have to split the connection soon, is there anything else you want to talk about?”
“When can I do hero stuff again? I want to help people.”
“You’re going to be on a long term health leave from the field,” Bruce told him. They’d start calling it retirement when they exhausted all options. “In the meantime, we’ll work out some things you can do outside of the field. You can help out around the Cave, maybe feeding the bats and helping Ace practice his tricks. You can help Alfred organise things too. There’s also a lot Jason Todd can do too, a lot of volunteer work or I might be able to find some things for you to help out with at Wayne Enterprises.”
“I don’t mind that but I want to be a hero.”
“I know you do, but it’s not safe. I’m not going to let you get hurt again, lad.”
“I don’t want to be hurt either. But I… I love being Robin.”
“You were a brilliant Robin,” Bruce told him. “I’m so proud of you Jason.”
“This is because I messed up and you were mad and I can’t remember what happened but I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. It won’t happen again. I’ll be the best Robin.”
“Kiddo, I promise, this has nothing to do with that. You’re not in any trouble. You’re just hurt and remember you’re not allowed to patrol when you’re hurt.”
“For both your sakes, I’m going to have to sever the connection soon,” J’onn interrupted.
“I love you so much Jason and I’m going to do everything I can to give you the best life possible.”
“I love you and want you to be happy too.”
The connection faded out and Bruce was sat in a chair on the balcony, Jason in his arms. Jason buried his head in Bruce’s shoulder. Sensory overload after psychic connections wasn’t completely unknown, especially when one party was very much not respecting the other’s boundaries, not that Jason was acting with any malice. Bruce took a deep breath against his pounding headache. “Thank you, J’onn,” he meant to say aloud.
“You are welcome,” J’onn was apparently still in his head. “I could not sense any ways to help with his healing, however, I expect he will make some improvements with time.”
Bruce nodded. They had a long road ahead of them.
“I will leave you to your rather eventful interview,” Where a man stood, a sparrow flew off.
Bruce stood up with Jason in his arms, “Let’s get you inside.”
Alfred fussed over Jason once they were inside again. While the skin graft on his torso did mean they currently had to be a little bit careful around extreme temperatures, lacking sweat glands and vellus hairs on a significant portion of his surface area was a problem, Bruce wasn’t sure how to remind Alfred that Jason was a physically fit seventeen-year-old and not a newborn and it wasn’t that cold outside. That said, he thought that part of the fussing was just another excuse to absolutely dote on him. As such, he just smirked when Jason was led over to the sofa and then handed the most extravagant hot chocolate Bruce had ever seen, the kid looking at it more confused than anything else. “It’s hot chocolate,” Bruce told him, sitting next to him with his notably less dramatic hot chocolate. He now noticed that Clark was missing.
“Putting out a house fire, he’ll be back,” Lois said quickly. “We can continue the interview or call it and talk later online if you want?”
Jason flopped over, spilling whipped cream and a couple of marshmallows onto Bruce’s leg. Bruce held the hot chocolate for him before he could spill any hot liquid on either of them.
“Are you okay with Lois and I talking for a bit?” he asked as Alfred brought over a silicon straw for Jason’s hot chocolate.
Jason nodded before slowly working out how to use the straw.
Bruce sipped at his own hot chocolate and waited for Lois to continue asking questions.
“So, can either of you tell me what you like to get up to, Jason?”
“Car,” Jason replied.
Bruce paused, waiting to see if Jason would move somewhere or if he was saying he genuinely liked cars. “Yeah, we like going on drives,” Bruce agreed, “Jay also likes watching car restoration videos on the TV. He likes water, playing in the rain, helping out with the dishes, splashing around in the bath, the sound and visuals and sensations are all pretty exciting. He likes a lot of physical games, catch and play fighting and anything that involves running around.”
Jason shifted around next to him, reaching for the book of coloured and patterned paper they’d made him. He liked to flip through it and shred it and it worked as a good fidget and somewhat of a conversation starter. He then wriggled around until he was a comfortable position, feet pressing hard into the sofa arm and shoulder digging into the side of Bruce’s thigh as he rested his head on his legs.
Bruce adjusted his hold on Jason’s hot chocolate so he could still sip from it in that position as he proceeded to tear paper.
Lois smiled. “Do you like tearing paper?” she asked Jason.
No response. Bruce had a feeling that the kid had decided he was done with conversations for most of the day.
“He loves shredding paper and flicking it through his fingers. He’ll do it to books if he has the opportunity to but he does also love being read to as well,” Bruce brushed a strand of Jason’s hair back behind his ear, it had nearly been a year since he found him now which meant it had nearly been a year since Jason last had a haircut. Bruce then processed that it had nearly been a year since he had Jason back. It wouldn’t be that long before he’d had him back for longer than he’d lost him. Another three years and he would have known him like this for longer than he’d known him as he was before. How long before his idea of Jason in his head resembled the boy in front of him rather than the one who’d died?
“Are you alright?” Lois asked then.
Bruce grunted, realising that he’d been brooding again. “Fine.”
“We can call it if you want?”
“I’d rather get this over and done with,” he replied.
“People are going to want to know about the rescue.”
“From what I know the Titans found him in the warehouse with the other trafficking victims and did some sort of hero magic involving face comparisons to find out who he was. The police are working on it. I want whoever hurt him to come to justice but I don’t want to put Jason through any more trauma to do that,” Bruce said. “He has burns, a lot of nasty looking scars, some joint problems and potentially multiple traumatic brain injuries, he hasn’t been able to tell us where they came from yet, but his doctors are going to help him heal from as much as possible. He’ll get better, whatever that means for him.”
Lois clicked the recorder off. “Off the record and out of pure curiosity, where did you actually find him?”
“Curled up outside the ruins of a safehouse door,” Bruce told her. “It took me months to believe he was actually him and we only got full confirmation a few days ago.”
Jason was still too busy shredding paper to respond.
“Back on the record, what’s next for you with this change in circumstances.”
“A definite shift in work-life balance. Maybe a bit of a decline in the bachelor life.”
Lois looked surprised, “Are you planning on dropping anything?”
“Not at all, just a shift in ratios,” Bruce said. “I’ve missed more than three quarters of my son’s life thus far for various reasons. I’m going to make sure he knows he’s number one priority.”
Jason briefly made eye contact with him and handed him a scrap of blue paper.
“Thank you for the paper,” Bruce told him as Jason returned to his task.
“What’s next for Jason?”
“We’re going to try homeschooling, speech and occupational therapy, but at the end of the day my priorities are for him to be happy and know that he’s safe and loved. I’ll do anything to make that true for him.”
Lois smiled slightly, “I’d say he knows that.”
“Well, I apologise for Clark’s disappearance but it’s wonderful to see you both again.” She stood up to leave and Jason glanced up at her.
“Bye,” he muttered. Bruce wasn’t sure if it was a genuine social bye or a “Go away” but it was good communication either way.
“I’ll send over the report in a few hours for you both to read over. If there’s no glaring issues it will be in the news tomorrow morning,” she said.
Bruce would have walked her to the door if not for Jason, luckily Alfred handled that instead.
He ended up dozing for a while after that, feeling Jason fall asleep on his legs too. Over the past few days they’d tried and very much failed to get Jason onto a normal sleep schedule. If they were awake, he wanted to be awake, this was to the extent that he’d refuse to sleep unless someone was in the room or preferably making contact with him. Lilith had warned that Jason might show regression in some skills as they all started to fall out of survival mode. Sleep wasn’t that big of a deal, he was still getting between six and ten hours a day, sneaking in the occasional bonus nap while Bruce and Alfred were both awake and he was bored. Bruce was more worried about the recent surge in meltdowns which Lilith said were a good sign he was feeling safe enough to process things, even if Bruce would much rather he felt safe enough to be happy.