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Language:
English
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Published:
2024-05-07
Updated:
2024-08-17
Words:
10,508
Chapters:
11/?
Comments:
63
Kudos:
113
Bookmarks:
4
Hits:
1,648

Parodies of Reddit Posts and Other Media as Carmen Characters

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Summary:

Basically I found some reddit posts and other types of media posts and I substitute the characters names for the people making the comments because I think they are fitting.

Sometimes I straight up parody the post and put it into the context of the show. Especially with the characters saying it as if it was something they said or posted originally.

Notes:

We have died for not having a beta.

Would have known to label this fanfiction correctly the first time if we had one.

Either way, welcome to my twisted psyche. I hope you share my dumb sense of humour.

DISCLAIMER this is a multi-ship fic so if two quotes seem to ship something different that's why.

No idea how many chapters of this there will be. I'm going to be pumping these out like crazy until my inspiration gets a random dry spell and then when it returns I will start losing sleep again.

Don't mind me making small changes and spell fixes to this fanfic occasionally. I have decided to do a mitosis and now I am also the beta.

I do have the screen shots of the threads and comments parodied so you can ask me for them. Found them on public subreddits and websites, Including YouTube. I recommend Jeaney Collects and Matt Rose as a channel if you like the unhinged humour of these chapters.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Beverages

Chapter by

Chapter Text

Coach brunt: Which one of ya'll was gonna tell me that tea tastes different if you put it in hot water?

Maelstrom: Y-you were putting it in cold water????

Cleo: Coach! Answer the question coach.

Coach brunt: Yeah??? I thought for. 5 years that people just put it in hot water to speed up the tea-ification process, didn't realize there was an actual reason.

Saira Bellum: You don't have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes??

Cleo: Why are you-putting it in the microwave. To boil it?!

Saira Bellum: Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove?!

Cleo: It takes Less than A minute!

Saira Bellum: Bestie is your stovetop powered by the fucking sun?!

Cleo: How long does it take you to boil water on the stove?!

Saira Bellum: Like seven minutes.

Cleo: Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat and it boils in like two minutes... less than that if you use a saucepan...

Saira Bullum Crying: You're putting the whole mug on the stove???? On medium heat???? Your stove is enchanted.

Shadowsan: Every single person in this room is a god forsaken lunatic.

Rounabout: Do none of you own a fucking kettle?!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bellum preparing to mind wipe Graham except her machine hasn't booted up yet.

Saira Bellum: Would you like a drink?

She opened the fridge. "We have water, milk, juice, spiders, Dr pepper-"

Graham: "Spiders?"

Bellum: "Spiders it is, then."

Graham: "No that wasn't-"

But she was already pouring him a brimming glass of spiders.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Coach Brunt: My 6/yo slipped half a corn cob in a water bottle, called it "corn water." Screwed it tight, checks it daily, guards it scrupulously. Tonight she took a stealthy sip and said "Needs another day." 

I just realised she's making.... moonshine?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Coach Brunt handing Black Sheep a beer: Excellent marks for the mock test lambkins!

Shadowsan: Absolutely not coach. The kid is only 15.

Brunt: Oh!

She hands Black Sheep a second bottle

Brunt: You are a growing girl!

Shadowsan: NO!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bellum walks into a bar: Can I have some H2O?

Someone laughs: I'll have some H2O too!

They drink it all and die