Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Atsushi was crying, once again trying to hide his sobs from the headmaster lest he be further punished. Atsushi knew he wasn't allowed to cry, but he was just nine, and he couldn't control his tears yet.

The young boy was currently sitting outside in the grass, having been kicked out for the night, but still chained to a special pole the orphanage people had set up for him. It was autumn and cold winds had already set in, which did not help with his current condition, the cold air biting at his blistered and still healing skin.

Atsushi had his head between his legs, trying to stay as warm as possible, when a tree branch broke near him in the bushes, and his head shot up. This wasn't the first time a branch had broken today; however, something about this time just felt… off.

Trying to see better in the darkness, not aided by the current half moon, he wiped away his tears and stared forward, right at the spot the branch had cracked.

Something stared back at Atsushi.

Atsushi yelped, scrambling backwards as far as the chains would let him, and even further, at the cost of his neck being squeezed. He winced, making sure to be quiet and show as little weakness as possible, then stared at the eyes again.

Well, not really only eyes anymore.

Out of the darkness stepped a malnourished child with tattered clothes. At first, Atsushi thought the child was another orphan who somehow had snuck out and decided to further injure him for ‘bonus points’, but the suspicion was discarded quickly. Atsushi would have remembered a child with special hair like that; black with white tips.

Atsushi blinked at the child, no longer as spooked by the child that kind of looked like a ghost. “Um-”

“Why are you chained up?” The other interrupted rudely, coming a little closer. Atsushi scooted forwards a little so that his collar wouldn't pinch as much, and thought about what he had done wrong.

“Well,-” He looked back at the orphanage for a second, really not remembering what exactly he had done wrong. “-I guess I did something the headmaster didn't like? He doesn't like me much in general, but, um - maybe one of the other kids blamed me again.” 

His throat was raw from screaming at the earlier punishments, and he winced yet again.  “Ah, my name is Atsushi, by the way! Everyone calls me 78 but, um, I don't like that very much.”

The ghostly child approaches yet again, crouching down to Atsushi's level. The child's pale skin contrasted a lot with their surroundings, Atsushi noticed. 

“Akutagawa Ryunosuke. Are you injured?” Akutagawa's voice sounded slightly male. Atsushi will go with that, then. He thought the question over and grimaced at the reminder of pain. He pulled at his dirty hair in nervousness. After a little thought, he nodded. The look in the other's eyes soured slightly. “Where?” Atsushi pointed at his ribs, wondering why Akutagawa was asking.

He wasn't going to offer to help him with the wounds, right? There was no way he could pay the other back, and it was visible. Yes, it was much more likely that the other was going to further injure him, now that he knew how much of an easy target he was. He discreetly shimmied backwards, only now noticing the dark look in Akutagawa's eyes, and gulped. 

—

Akutagawa offered to help with his wounds. 

In his shock at the offer, he just numbly nodded, and now Akutagawa was apparently treating some of the wounds on his back. He did have to take off his shirt for that, which, considering the chains, would have been much more difficult if Atsushi's clothes hadn't been at least three sizes too big for him. 

He winced at some of the touches. Akutagawa was treating the burns on his back with some kind of cold liquid. It did help a lot with the stinging, so close yet unlike the harsh autumn winds, and he soon felt fatigue set in.

He rapidly shook his head at the offer of bandages, though. If Headmaster discovered his now treated wounds, he was going to do much worse than just some small burns, he told the darker haired male. 

At the murderous look in the other’s eyes, Atsushi panicked in fear of seeming ungrateful and quickly both apologized and thanked Akataguwa for the troubles, which he dismissed with a simple hand wave.

It was nearing morning, so Akutagawa quickly left with a wave and a muttered ‘I'll be back, don't get injured anymore or I will break your legs’.

Well.

Not ominous at all.

…

Listen, it wasn't Atsushis fault the Headmaster didn't like him, okay? He didn't even do much, this time! He just watched a moth fly around a little and got distracted from his chores, which then resulted in another punishment.

Means he was chained outside. Again. Right after Akutagawa told him not to get injured.

He really couldn't catch a break, could he?

Well, at least Akataguwa came back and treated his injuries again. The younger boy thought it was just a joke. He even managed to do some conversation with the older boy!

“You're not from the orphanage, are you?”

“No.”

“Um, where are you from then?”

“The slums.”

“What's that?”

“A place for poor people.”

“Oh! So, for people that didn't get enough points from doing their chores?” Atsushi triumphantly said, proud to finally know something. Akutagawa just blinked at him. 

“Do you know what money is?”

…In the end, Akutagawa had to explain the concept of money to Atsushi. He hears Akutagawa curse something about ‘stupid orphanages’ and ‘buffoons for teachers’, but he chose to ignore that.

They soon parted ways again, Atsushi with a little more knowledge and Akutagawa with an upcoming headache.

His legs weren't broken by the older, which Atsushi counted as a win for the day.

Little mercies.

–

They continued meeting like that. 

One, sometimes both, injured, and they treat each other's wounds, then simply talk and bask in the other's presence. Sometimes, they share food, either from sneaking some from the orphanage kitchen or bringing tiny leftovers.

One time, Akutagawa brought a tiny bit of money, and taught him how to count it and how it can be used. More knowledge!

Akutagawa introduces Rashomon, and they become fond of each other, the silent forest the only witness to their friendship.

…

Too bad things can't last forever.

Chapter Text

Akutagawa was missing.

Again.

This was the third week, and slowly, Atsushi was getting worried. Sure, the older might have been on some mission to gather food and money, and had an overnight job that he'd somehow scraped up, but Atsushi really can't help it.

What if he'd died?

No, no, Akutagawa isn't as weak as to simply die. But what other reason would there be?

Maybe he left you, the traitorous voice in the back of his head hissed. He rapidly shook his head, choppily cut hair swaying side to side. No, Akutagawa wouldnt simply leave like that, would he? Right? 

Maybe Atsushi had done something wrong. He always did.

He could explain it to Akutagawa when he comes back! It was Atsushi's fault he left, after all.

Once he came back.

If.

…

There's a new adult at the orphanage, Atsushi notices. Another white haired person, but not as old as that nice granny that once came by. Maybe he and Atsushi were related? Their hair color looks so much alike, after all!

Hopefully he wouldn't get in trouble for asking silly questions like that. But he really just needed to know!

—

He didn't get in trouble. It was a wonder! A.. uh… easter miracle? He's not sure, it sounds kind of wrong.

Anyway! When Atsushi had asked his silly question, the adult just laughed and introduced himself as Shibusawa. The two weren't related, to his disappointment, but he did get complimented on his bravery to ask questions. 

Atsushi had to gape for a few minutes there. He was never rewarded for his silly questions! After all, they were very silly and didn't deserve to be answered. And then this random Shibusawa shows up and immediately does it. Maybe he hadn't been told by the Headmaster yet, how bad of a child he was.

Or hadn't realized it yet. He wasn't as oblivious as to not see when the Headmaster was pointing at him and talking about him to Shibusawa.

Well, he might as well enjoy it while it lasts.

Shibusawa seemed nice.

—

He was showing Atsushi how to read. 

Atsushi had bern in the library, hiding from the Headmaster in a small, scarcely stocked shelf, when a pale hand had picked him up gently by the scruff.

At first, he'd tried to fight back, but then he realized it was Shibusawa and went limp in his hold.

Shibusawa held him further up with one hand, the other folded patiently behind him, and smiled softly. “Well, hello there. What are you doing?”

Atsushi fidgeted, trying to find any escape routes if he needed them. “Um, I was, uh, trying to read?” He pointed at a book he had opened, still sitting on the empty shelf. Shibusawa blinked at that.

“Are you aware you are reading your book upside down?” Atsushi blushed furiously at being caught, and crossed his arms while glaring at the book as if it offended him somehow. Shibusawa simply laughed. “Would you like me to teach you to read?” The adult's eyes glimmered weirdly for a moment, but Atsushi ignored it in favor of nodding hastily.

Shibusawa laughed once again.

Shibusawa was nice.

—

Atsushi stumbled, continuing to run through the now abandoned corridors. Behind him, kids with scissors were chasing him and laughing. They seemed to have fun, but Atsushi didn't. He really didn't. 

He skidded to a halt, running down another hallway with panicked breathing, when he slammed into a person at full speed with an ’oomph!’

Atsushi staggered back, noticing faintly that the other's had stopped chasing him, but the relief shadowed over by pure, unadulterated fear.

He had ran into an adult.

He was so, so dead.

Bony hands grasped Atsushi's wrist. His breath cut off, flinching back and staring up through blurry vision. He could barely make out glinting eyes and panicked even further, all his strenght leaving him.

“So- sorry- no- please-”, he stammered, breath coming out in quick gasps. It was hot. No, it was cold. He shivered. He had so messed up. He was going to be chained in the basement and starved again, wasn’t he? Not like he deserved less. Who did he think he was, being happy-

“-sushi. Atsushi!” He flinched up, staring at Shibusawa in front of him. When had he gotten here? Oh. He was still talking. He tuned back in to what the other was saying. “-You're fine. I won't hurt you, so calm down.”

Atsushi stared, unblinkingly, and asked.

“Do you promise?”

“I promise not to hurt you.”

…

Shibusawa was a liar.

Chapter Text

What happened?

He doesn’t remember. He doesn't remember. He doesn't-

…All he remembers is pain, and then a bright flash of blue among the other sparks, and then red.

Where was he?

He gripped the floor. Grass… ah, he was outside again. Chained, most likely.

Cuts caused by medical tools littered his body, his shirt bloody and torn. Maybe, once Akutagawa gets here, he will help.

Right.

Akutagawa is gone.

…

Maybe it is better that way. He wont have to see what kind of mess Atsushi had become, what he had done-

Wait, what had he done?

He… doesn't remember that much.

Maybe a nap will help.

Yeah, the cold winds will soothe his wounds, maybe it’ll remind him of Akutagawa and his soft touches. The thing he had brought to their first meeting and many meetings after, which he explained was burn cream at some point.

He had also said that every house should have it, even his orphanage.

…

Wow, he must be thinking about akutagawa so much that hes hallucinating him! Because there he stood, a dark coat and proper clothes and a terrified look on him-

Wait, why was he terrified? Everything’s alright, isnt it? He tried pushing himself up (when did he collapse?) but only failed, crying out in pain.

Akutagawa darted forward, Rashomon rising in agitation. The dark haired male seemed panicked, looking at atsushi with murder in his eyes. “Who did this to you? Was it the Headmaster? I swear I'll-” 

Atsushi interrupted weakly, giggling. It was good to know Akutagawa was back, even if it was just a hallucination. “No, wasn’ headmast'r. ‘Nother adult.”, he frowned, squinting at the bright lights in his vision. Wasn't it night? “He w's nice. Don’ like him anymore.”

His speech was so jumbled it was hard to understand it at some parts, and Akutagawas frown deepened. “Atsushi, what'd he do to you?” That’s another part he liked about Akutagawa. He never called him by his number, just Atsushi. Then, his mind registered the question and he tensed.

Bright sparks, a manic smile and glinting eyes, words telling him that he was ‘so interesting’ and how Atsushi will be ‘his saviour’, then pain pain pain-

He stopped thinking about it, only realizing how harshly he was digging into Akutagawa with his bloodstained nails (blood blood blood everywhere) when the mentioned started rubbing Atsushi's hands. At the touch, he realized Akutagawa may not currently be a hallucination.

He released Akutagawa from his grip. “Don't wanna talk about it. Where were you?”

Akutagawa frowned at the obvious topic change and the topic in question, but sighed, simply adjusting himself and Atsushi in his embrace so they could sit properly. He brought out a piece of bread, breaking it in half, and giving one half to Atsushi who quickly devoured it with a speed Rashomon could only hope to achieve. Atsushi seemed a little sick though, something Rashomon had the chance of never experiencing.

“I was… busy. My group got attacked.” Atsushi sat up quickly at this, already having known about Akutagawa's sister and their friendly group of slum-children, whispering in alarm. 

“Are they okay?”

Akutagawa averted his eyes. The answer was clear to Atsushi now, too. He slumped against Akutagawa, hugging him as best as he could with his injuries. “Akutagawa, I-”

“Ryunosuke.” Atsushi blinked.

“What?”

Akutagawa inclined his head. “Call me Ryunosuke. I feel we've been… friends long enough.”

Atsushi brightened like the full moon on a dark night, nodding vigorously. “Okay Ryuu!”, then sobered up when remembering the topic they were at. “What happened after that?”

Akutagawa frowned, turning dark eyes to stare up at the cloudy sky. “I went off to kill the perpetrators.” Atsushi gasped, scandalized. The darker haired boy glanced at him briefly. He had expected this reaction. He tensed. Atsushi would probably hate him now-

“What? But that's dangerous! Did you get hurt anywhere? Is that why you were gone that long?” Akutagawa gaped. Never in his fourteen years of life had he ever met someone as kind as Atsushi, and yet he was surprised every time by the kindness radiating off of him.

He looked for any lies in sunset eyes, a little hard to see in the dark night, and yet he saw only sincerity. He huffed, patting the other malnourished boy on the head softly. “No, I didn’t get hurt. Another person got to them first. He… accepted me as an apprentice and gave me a job, but I wasn't allowed to leave so soon after my acceptance. That's why I've been gone.”

Atsushi nodded, still processing the words. “Then why are you so hurt?” He tensed, cursing in the privacy of his mind. Of course Atsushi had noticed. He always did, and if he didn't know better he would think that was his ability.

Actually, considering how fast his wounds have been healing, he might not have been too off. Akutagawa took Atsushi's hand, watching a cut scab over and slowly start to heal in real time. Huh. Interesting.

…He couldn't let Dazai-san find out about this.

Shaking off those thoughts and leaving them for tomorrow, Akutagawa finally considered how to explain to Atsushi that his new mentor wasn't very… kind in his teachings. He settled on a half-truth.

“Well, the job I do is hard and dangerous, that's why my mentor has to be, um, a little harsh in his teachings, I guess. Nothing I havent experienced before. But it does have great pay. I can eat comfortably now, and you can too, now.” His excitement grew, grabbing onto Atsushi's hand. “Once I get older, I can easily get you out of here. No more orphanage, no more Headmaster and as much chazuke as you want!” Akutagawa smiled, a small phantom smile, but a smile nonetheless.

Atsushi grinned, not poking at the holes in his story, though he had probably noticed them.

They celebrated with a shared piece of bread, a feeling of hope blooming between them.

Chapter Text

“Teach me how to fight.”

Ryunosuke cracked one eye open, staring right into determined sunset eyes. “What?”

“You know how to fight, you've been learning it with your mentor,-" he said that word so maliciously Ryunosuke had to blink before continuing to listen, "-and your time in the slums clearly has taught you something.” He hefted himself up, coming face-to-face with Ryunosuke. “So teach me!”

Ryunosuke looked at Atsushi, scrutinizing him. He pondered the pros and cons, before finding another issue. “You're chained. How will you move?” 

At this, Atsushi simply stood up, snipped his fingers once, and… All chains fell off? Ryunosuke took one of them into his hand, realizing the lock was already long broken, withered away by weather and the Headmasters harsh handling.

He looked up at Atsushi again, who looked far too smug at the little show he put on. Ryunosuke sighed, standing up and stretching, bones cracking in a way that sounded like someone was being crushed. 

Today, he wasn't that injured. Atsushi had probably been waiting a while to ask for a few fighting sessions, but had waited until he wasn't as incapacitated by former…. ’missions’.

(The day he had told Atsushi about Dazai-san was a day with a lot of threats of decapitations towards his mentor. Atsushi wasn't this violent when he first met him. Probably infected him with his general Ryunosuke-ness then.)

How Atsushi always knew about how injured he was, he is not sure. It might have to do with his appearent healing ability, which he still hasn't talked to Atsushi about. He should do that soon.

He stood up, preparing to teach about the rules of fighting first, then just sparring with Atsushi to see how much he already knew.

The full moon shined down on them.

Something changed.

Ryunosuke stared, watching as Atsushi's pupils became slits like a cats, and with a bright light, the young boy vanished.

In his place stood a giant, white and black striped tiger, staring Ryunosuke down like prey.

The person in question stumbled back, but immediately prepared Rashomon in case the tiger tried to attack. However, he would never hurt Atsushi, so Rashomon was more to run away. Cowardly, but safer than trying to fight against a giant, magical glowing tiger. He blankly stared ahead, dark eyes meeting sunset colored ones. 

This was something Ryunosuke never got over. He knew about heterochromia, but never had he seen a beautiful combination like this.

Well, it would be beautiful if the eyes didn't belong to a tiger that was currently snarling and biting at the air. Ryunosuke didn't snarl back, but his eyelid did twitch.

The reason was the thoughts currently plaguing his mind.

When Ryunosuke first got his ability, he and his sister were being attacked by a rabid, snarling dog. It had already killed multiple of their group and injured others, meaning the dog had already gotten a taste of human meat. It was growling and had cornered them, and even one bite probably meant the end.

In the panic of the moment, Ryunosuke wished to just have something, something to slash and defend his sister with. That's when his ability activated for the first time, killing the dog instantly.

It had just been a weak tendril then, but it was enough.

Back to the topic on hand.

Atsushi had never transformed before, and he should know, considering how long they've known each other.

Atsushi's wounds always healed normally and scarred, much different to how quickly his injuries healed in the last few days.

Ryunosuke finally scowled, nails digging into the palm of his hand.

Abilities manifest through traumatic experiences, moments where death passes by so closely the body improvises and manifests something previously unknown to the body, just to survive.

Atsushi didn't manifest an ability until this ‘other adult’ came by.

Just what had happened to the other boy?

Ryunosuke was ripped from his thoughts by a loud snarl, coming from the tiger. It was growling, claws digging into the earth. There was something shining in the creature's eyes. 

Ryunosuke recognized it. After all, he had it in his own eyes so many times. The time with the dog, any time another child died, wondering if his sister was next.

Protective fear.

Not knowing what else to do, Ryunosuke lifted a hand, offering the tiger to sniff it, like he would with an street cats he saw. Unlike dogs, they were quite nice to be around, with their purring.

He did it with a slow and exaggerated movement, but the tiger still startled and let out a warning growl, though it simmered out at the lack of danger.

Seeing this, Ryunosuke was sure.

“I won't hurt Atsushi.” The tiger let out a small yelp, tail snipping, before it stepped forward, sniffing Ryunosuke's hand. It scrutinized the boy, and Ryunosuke felt as if he was being dissected, his mind opened for the tiger to see. Then, the tiger put its head on Ryunosukes palm. It seemed he had passed some kind of test.

He patted the tiger's head, only now realizing how absolutely massive the tiger was compared to him or Atsushi.

Ryunosuke tilted his head sighing. “You're Atsushi's other protector, aren't you?” The tiger opened its eyes, a noise not quite a purr escaping its throat. They stared into each other's eyes, sunset yellow with slit pupils into a black so dark it seemed like an abyss. 

The sunset eyes, so familiar yet not really those kind eyes, blinked slowly, then chuffed. ’You will protect the cub with me.’, it seemed to say. “I will protect Atsushi alongside you.” He answered.

The tiger inclined its head. A bright light flashes, and an unconscious Atsushi slumps into his hold.

Hm.

This'll be a hassle to explain tomorrow.

…

Since when does Atsushi have a strand of black in his hair?

Chapter Text

Atsushi sneaks through the dark halls of the orphanage, listening for sounds in the dark, although it wasn't as dark as he initially thought. It was kind of weird, considering how he didn't have the ability to see and hear this well before that day. The day Ryunosuke came back.

(A giant white door loomed before him. He couldn't remember.)

He shook his head, losing the weird phantom sensation he had for a few seconds. Right now, he was hungry, and he had to concentrate to not get caught.

Steps echoed through a nearby corridor, and Atsushi dove behind a small drawer, stored in a corner for later use. It would probably never move from this spot, though. The orphanage caretakers already forgot about living, breathing children easily; why would they bother to remember anything this mundane?

Once the steps came closer, Atsushi was able to recognize the style of walking; it was a rather cruel caretaker, often punishing children harshly for even the smallest of things. He couldn't get caught here.

Pressing both hands against his mouth, he sat and stood still. And didn't move.

Not when the steps came closer.

Not when the steps halted close to him.

He closed his eyes.

The steps continued.

Atsushi breathed a sigh of relief, looking up to get ready to run, and instead met two very angry eyes, staring down at him.

His breath hitched.

“Well, hello there, 78.”

—

He was locked in the basement for three days after that. The chains were cold and the wind rushing through the corridors was unforgiving, and Atsushi was just glad to be outside again. Even if he was just chained outside again. Though he still hasn't eaten anything in four days now.

The punishments after the day Ryu came back seemed to become much more harsh and longer, for some reason. Maybe they had found out about Ryu… No, they wouldn't have allowed him outside, then. Weird.

A bush nearby rustled, and dark fabric stepped out. Speak of the devil. “Ryu!”, Atsushi happily called, embracing him as soon as he got close enough. He inhaled his scent, and finally felt somewhat at peace after four days.

Ryu caught him, bringing him down to the grassy ground and humming. His face was still stuck in the same blank expression, but Atsushi knew from the sparkle in his eyes and the twitch of his lips that Ryu was happy. Happy to see him! Atsushi!

They sat down close to each other, both in criss-cross-applesauce positions or whatever the other kids had called it. Atsushi leaned forwards. Ryu didnt mention the parts of Atsushis wrist that had been chained too tightly, and Atsushi didn't mention how Ryu had gotten paler and unhealthier skin in the time he was gone. A mutual understanding.

“So? What'd I miss?”

Ryu sighed, a fond undertone coloring his words. “Not much. Dazai-san had to go on a mission the last few days, so Chuuya-san was allowed to take care of me. He's a much better mentor than Dazai-san, he even showed me how to do paperwork.” He added the last bit at seeing Atsushi's sour face at the mention of Dazai-san.

Atsushi humphed, crossing his arms alongside his legs. “This Chuuya better be nice to you. Or I'll … Ugh… do something, I don't know yet. But I will, as well as Dazai-san!”, he promised. “I'll rip out his fingers one by one, then his limbs, then put him in a pickle container and cook him, all while he's still alive!”

Ryu let out a quiet giggle, slightly concerned at the threat. Where had he even learned such graphic words? Probably that library of the orphanage. Eugh.

“I'll… yeah, you do you, I guess. Uhm, where was I? Right, Chuuya-san. He taught me properly, and we went on a minor mission together. It was about a criminal that had used electric chairs to-...”

Ryus words got muffled here, and Atsushi's focus wandered away. Electric chairs...? Something happened recently regarding that. Something important.

Something…

(A giant white door loomed before him. He wouldn’t remember.)

“...sushi? Atsushi?” Fingers snipping in front of him broght Atsushi out of his thoughts. He shivered violently. His vision was blurry, yet when he reached up, no tears were found. What…?

“Atsushi, can you see me?” Ryu's face came into focus. He blinked, a memory briefly flashing through his mind, too quickly to grasp what it was. He nodded blearily once the question registered and rubbed his eyes. Ryu looked very concerned at this. 

He seemed to be in an internal conflict with himself, before one side won and he slumped in defeat. “Atsushi, do you remember what happened the night I came back after vanishing for a few months?”

Atsushi tilted his head, like a confused cat would. “Yeah? You came back and we took care of my wounds-”

“Before that, I mean.”, Ryu clarified, noting internally how Atsushi's expression falters.

“Um,” he starts, suddenly not as enthusiastic as before, clearly calculating his words before he speaks them. “The memory is a bit muddy… I don't remember a lot, starting from a bit after you left. Um, a few weeks? The story might take a bit… Do you have time?” At Ryu's encouraging nod, Atsushi slipped into his lap, hugging Ryus arm in search of comfort. In return, he scratched Atsushis head with his other hand, like one would do to a cat.

Atsushi seemed to calm himself for a moment, before finally speaking in a quiet voice.

“Ah, I think I was lonely and sad, for a while? There was nobody I could talk to.” Ryu winced at this. “You had a reason though, so it's alright. Anyway, after a bit, another adult showed up? I think he had white hair. He was. Um. Nice to me.” Atsushi got lost in memory for a second, crumbling memories reassembling slowly.

(A giant white door loomed before him. He would remember.)

“He showed me how to read properly, and didn't get mad that I asked questions, and did not get mad when i ran into him. He also gave me some food, I think, and stopped the other adults from hurting me. And then…” His eyes were unfocused now. Just what had Happened? He just remembered the basement, cold, scalpels, then pain pain pain-

Ryu tensed, holding Atsushi close.

“Why… I can't remember… why can't I remember?!” Tears stung his vision, clouding Ryus concerned face looking at him. “All I remember is that we went to the basement and… He told me to sit in a chair.. and I didnt want to, but he made me, and then-” he gasped, fingers digging into the other boy.

The door creaks.

Shibusawa is dead.

Ryus eyes widened, no doubt connecting all the strings and blood that was coating Atsushi that day.

The door opens.

“I killed him.” 

Chapter Text

Atsushi grips his hair, eyes wide and wild, his grip leaving Ryus arm to instead rip his hair. What had he done!?

“No, Atsushi, it's not your fault, it wasn't you that killed him.” Ryu gripped his wrists, stopping his trembling fingers from hurting himself more in his panic.

Atsushi rapidly shook his head, droplets of blood from where he had scratched his face painting the floor and his clothes. His fault, it was obviously his fault!*He glared at Ryu, confused at how he even came to the conclusion that Atsushi wasn't at fault. He squirmed, for the first time trying to hurt Ryu in a fit of panic.

Ryu looked at him with stern eyes, softening his grip but not letting go, speaking with a calm voice. “Atsushi, listen to me. Will you listen?” Atsushi hesitantly nodded, slightly calming his mindless thrashing for now, to not hurt Ryu any further. “Alright. Do you know what abilities are?” Atsushi nodded once again, looking pointedly at the part of Rashomon that unconsciously activated. Ryu nodded. “Yes, abilities. I have an ability called Rashomon.”

Atsushi stared, wondering where he was going with this. Ryu sighed, maneuvering Atsushi into a more comfortable position in his lap.

“Rashomon, like all abilities, manifested during a moment where I was sure me and my sister were going to die.” Atsushi gaped, “I think you also manifested an ability.” Atsushi looked at him as if he had gone insane at this point. 

Ryu shook his head, holding Atsushi tighter. The pressure was grounding, in a way. It brought him out of the sinkhole of thoughts and flashbacks that he had almost fallen into.

“I won't ask you what happened in that basement with the adult,” Atsushi finally relaxed for a brief second, “but I know it was terrible and terrifying. It was traumatic. And your body evolved in order to survive.”

Atsushi looked unsure, but still ready to deny everything. “But I st- still killed him. What even is my ability? It's impossible.” He shook his head, unbelieving.

Ryu averted his eyes at this, shifting nervously. Atsushi stared at him, unblinkingly, until Ryu finally revealed, “Your ability is a large white tiger. You transformed yesterday,” He elaborated, seeing the confused expression on Atsushi's face. 

“Atsushi, you didn't kill him. Your tiger did, and you and your tiger are not the same person, but you coexist. It did it only to protect you. You would not have survived otherwise. Do you understand?”

He was still in denial, but slowly nodded. He had understood, but it was a hard truth to swallow. Still, he changed the topic quickly.

“Is that why my hearing and eyesight have gotten better?” Ryu looked put off by the change in topic, but conceded. For now.

“Yes, I'd think so. You only got it after the incident, right? It may be because-”

They talked for a while after that, holding hands and close all the while, theorizing about his new ability, what it could do. They watched an accidental thorn wound heal in seconds, and Ryu made fun of him for being such a cat after trying to leap after a snake that slithered by.

Dawn neared, and with a final embrace, they parted ways, both with a lot to think about.

—

Chuuya was suspicious. 

No, he himself was not the suspicious one. He was suspicious of one of the newer members, Akutagawa Ryunosuke. The mackarel's newest apprentice.

Chuuya had already noticed how the younger male would sometimes look as if he had not slept the entire night, but thought it was just insomnia or nightly missions. Still, he kept an eye on him.

One time, he visited the younger's dorm room to check with him for a mission, and he was not there. And Chuuya had purposefully checked if he was on missions or off duty. He had waited a while, and the youngster had only come back after the sun had risen, absolutely exhausted.

So, Chuuya was suspicious, yes.

Did he tell anyone about his findings? No, he was not a monster. He knew that, if that mackarel Dazai ever found out about this, the youngster would be found out in less than five minutes, and whatever he had clearly been protecting would be dead, or worse, be brought to the port mafia.

(A much more terrible fate, if you'd ask Chuuya. Or nearly everyone in the Port Mafia. Except Dazai, that stupid mackarel gets off of nearly dying.)

So, he told nobody where he was going one day, when he followed the black-white haired boy outside, discreetly marking down the path in his mind, silently watching as the boy seemed to gain a pep to his step, his speed increasing despite the exhaustion trailing behind him.

He made multiple turns and went through a forest, a trail already having been formed, likely from his many returns there.

Suddenly, a quiet voice rang out, and Akutagawa did the impossible;

He smiled.

Chuuya gaped, staring as a small, white haired malnourished boy embraced Akutagawa, dragging him to a post with chains, already quietly blabbering about things he couldn't hear, the older boy already nodding along. Arahabaki rattled in his mind, hissing things he couldn't understand at the sight of the kid, but he dismissed them, already distracted by the next movement of the child.

He picked up the chains and **attached them to himself?! What? 

He spied a few more injuries beneath the kid's collar, but what caught his eyes more was the overall appearence of the boy. 

White hair with a black strand, sunset eyes practically shining at the sight of Akutagawa, and small fangs flashed in a toothy grin.

An ability user, how surprising.

For now, he'd retreat and debate with himself for the next way of action. He moved from the tree, ready to active his ability and float down, when sunset eyes set on him and human pupils became slitted like a cat's. Chuuya froze.

The white haired ability user tilts his head to the side like a confused puppy, and Chuuya curses in the privacy of his mind at being discovered so easily.

“Is that a friend, Ryu?”

Chapter Text

Chuuya sighs, and promptly jumps down from the tree branch, meeting two pairs of eyes. His own blue eyes squint suspiciously, and he does his best to regain control in the situation. He does feel slightly bad once he sees how truly nervous and terrified the two children look.

He subtly clears his throat. “Well, Akutagawa, I wasn't aware you had a little friend here. Especially not an ability user.” Akutagawa tensed, discreetly moving in front of the other ability user to hide him. “Why don't you introduce us?”

The two share glances, seemingly communicating with only their eyes, before Akutagawa stepped forward. “This is Atsushi,-” he said with a frosty voice, “-and you will not take him to the port mafia.”

Chuuya blinks, momentarily stunned by the audacity of this new recruit, then barks a loud laugh. He notices the younger boy,  Atsushi, sneaking panicked glances at the building they were next to, which looks like a church, and remembers to be more quiet next time.

“Now now Akutagawa, is that how you speak to your senior? Dazai would be disappointed.” He grins, watching Atsushi's eyes widen. What's up with that? Meanwhile Akutagawa slouched, bowing. He seemed as if he wanted to apologize, when all the surprise in little Atsushi's eyes turned to pure, unadulterated rage.

“Dazai…” he growls, the hand that was still fisted in Akutagawa's clothes digging into Akutagawa's skin, dragging a pained hiss from him. Hm? “Why's everything about that guy? I bet I could skin him and with a potato peeler and-” he is interrupted by a panicked, still bowing Akutagawa slapping his palm over his mouth. 

“Not right now!” He hisses. 

Chuuya is once again stunned. Then, he barks out a laugh once again, this time quieter. “Oh, I like you!” He pretends to wipe away a tear from his eye, thoroughly amused. “Don't worry Akutagawa, your little friend is a safe secret with me! Where did you even find him?”

Akutagawa is the one surprised now, bowing properly before fiy straightening up and patting Atsushi's hair clean absentmindedly with his other hand. “Apologies again, Chuuya-san. We met by coincidence when I heard rustling in the nearby grass, back when I was still wandering. We have been… friends ever since.” 

Atsushi beamed at this, grinning up at Akutagawa behind the palm still on his face.

Then he bit Akutagawa's hand, right where he was still holding the hand over Atsushi. Akutagawa hissed, mumbled something quietly to the lighter-haired boy, who finally let go of his friend and also bowed.

“Nice to, meet you! Chuuya-san!” He squinted up at Akutagawa, totally not discreetly looking for approval. When he got a nod in return, he grinned again.

Chuuya, finally coming back from his blue screening, nodded in approval. “Nice to meet you too, Atsushi-kun.”

There was an awkward pause, before Atsushi straightened up again and bounced a little closer, and… sniffed? Maybe it was Chuuya's imagination. “I've heard about you! Ryu says you're nice, unlike that Dazai.” He huffed, ignoring Akutagawa's concerned and embarrassed glances.  

Chuuya huffed a laugh. “Yeah, but in comparison to that mackerel, really anyone is an angel.” Atsushi grinned, an approving glimmer in his sunset eyes, before doing an 180° and staring straight at Akutagawa, who was at this point almost an entire head taller than atsushi.

The younger boy grinned, eyes closed, clasping his hands together, and showed unexpectedly sharp teeth exposed for the world to see.

“So,-” he started, a slightly sadistic expression on his face, hidden under a mask of joy. Akutagawa tensed, apparently already knowing this expression from sometime before. “-Chuuya-san is your senior, and considering how both of you smell like blood and sewers, the metallic scent you once explained to me was gunpowder, as well as your injuries and Dazai-san - I'm guessing you both don't work some simple office job, do you?” Akutagawa froze, and Chuuya started. Is that why he had sniffed him earlier? What a strange child. “Considering how much crime you two just smell of but also the ranks, I'm guessing it is some sort of criminal organization, maybe the mafia?”

The two friends were locked in a staring contest, before Akutagawa wilted unter the heterochromic gaze and nodded. The gray haired boy's grin widened, spinning around in a circle in victory. “Yay! Got it right in one!” Then, he turned to Akutagawa again, a slightly somber expression on his face, and tilted his head. “Why didn't you tell me?”

Akutagawa looked around, nervous, before he settled on looking at Atsushi's mop of hair. Chuuya stepped backwards for a moment, far enough to not intrude but still able to hear their talk.

“I was scared how you'd react. Because of the crimes.” he confessed.

Atsushi blinked, one eye at a time, the burst out in hysteric giggles. He seemed to try to surpress it at first, but that failed when he saw the flabberghasted expression on the Akutagawa's face. “Oh, you're silly! If it's about the murder, I already knew about that. You always reek of death and blood that's not yours! And you wouldn't be the only murderer here, anyway, so I wouldn't judge.” Chuuya furrowed his brows, gaze sliding over the small form of Atsushi. The child looked to be around 9 or 10, and he had killed already? He continued with his observation, and his eyes soon landed on the orphanage.


A bad feeling settled in his chest.


Akutagawa looked at Atsushi, trying to find any lies, but there was just sincerety and amusement in the lighter haired's eyes. With a sigh, the older one dragged the younger into an out of character, bone crushing hug. “Of course you would find out. You know everything with just a glance.” Akutagawa groaned, annoyed if not for the faint ghost of a smile on his face.

The two finally seemed to remember the third in their midst right as yelling was heard from the church-like building. Both bristled and shared panicked glances, before Atsushi ran over to a pole and… attached chains to himself? What the fu- What kinda orphanage was that

Distantly, calls of “78” and loud swears were heard.

Meanwhile, Akutagawa was saying a quick goodbye before standing at Chuuya's side. They walked away from Atsushi together, and it was silent with only Chuuya's suspicious gaze, until Chuuya looked at Akutagawa with a questioning glance for the fifth time this walk and he spoke.

“Atsushi's orphanage is not… kind. That is why he is outside, chained, for the night very often. It is why we met at all.” He confessed, looking straight ahead. Chuuya hummed, understanding filling his tone. Of course, this was what he had thought already as well, though he wondered why an orphanage would do that. Perhaps due to the boy's strange appearence 

“I mean what I said earlier, by the way. I won't tell anyone about Atsushi.” He elaborated, seeing confusion cross the other's face briefly. Akutagawa relaxed slightly.

“Thank you, Chuuya-san. You're… very kind for higher ranking port mafiaso.” Chuuya smiled, but easily cowered it up with a scowl. 

“Now don't let anyone hear you say that, alright?! As far as you're concerned, I was never there.” He might have grumbled something along the lines of 'gotta have a reputation to uphold', but that would be between him and the wind.

There was a comfortable silence until the two mafiosos parted ways with a respecting nod.

Chapter Text

Atsushi grinned, a bounce in his step as he ran around the clearing where his discarded chains were. He was excited, and why wouldn't he be? Yesterday, Ryu had promised to teach him to fight!

Finally!

At the thought, Atsushi bounced even more, and the moment he hrard familiar rustling and Ryu's scent entered his nose, he dived forward and wrapped him in a hug. "Ryu!"

The other caught him, but coughed in surprise. "You seem excited." He noticed, his coughing supsiding.

Atsushi grinned, dragging Akutagawa to a proper sparring spot he had found near where the pole and chains were, and only then let go of him. "So, what are you gonna teach me first?"

Ryu blinked slowly, like a cat, and simply said, "Throw a punch at me."

Atsushi smiled. "Okay!" Without any hesitation at all, he punched towards Ryu, only to have his world move on its axis. In a mere moment, he was on the floor. 

Ryu was above him, hiding a smile behind a pale hand. "Not like that. Stand up." Atsushi stood up, and Ryu pushed his leg a bit further to the side with rashomoun, while correcting his arms with a nudge.

"Try again", he ordered, and Atsushi sid try again. Only, he ended up in the grass again for his efforts.

Ryu squinted at him from above. "Better. Still bad, but better." Atsushi whined at the insult, kicking Ryu in the shins and bringing him down to the ground with him, immediately attenpting to strangle the older. "Oh, you little-" the older retaliated by gripping Atsushi's hair lightly, and they wrangled on the floor, trying to strangle one another.

---

Ryu cleared his throat, and he would have looked dignified if it weren't for his wrinkled and dirtied clothes. Atsushi beamed, and they both ignored their earlier fight. "Next, you have to learn to dodge."

Atsushi nodded, before suddently noting that Rashomon had activated. There was a silent moment, before Rashomon suddently lashed out towards Atsushi, and he dove to the side not one second too late, as Rashomon dug into the ground next to him.

He squealed, and jumped up just to avoid a tendril coming from the ground by less than a needle width away. And then another tendril. And another. And-

---

Atsushi lay on the floor, completely exhausted. Bruises from falling onto the floor while dodging were already healing. Luckily, anywhere Rahsomon had hit him were stopped the moment it met his skin. Such great ability-control! He was once again starstruck by his best friend.

Sadly, Atsushi couldt let his clear loss stand so, in a moment of Ryu's distraction, he pounced onto the older child and brought them both down to the floor again. "Atsushi-!"

---

Ryu eyed the, now sitting on the floor, innocent looking Atsushi. He looked like an innocent child unaware of the dangers of the world.

Ryu knew better.

He had the fortune of listening to one of Atsushi's sleep-deprived speeches, in which he managed to fit three threats of decapitation, five counts of dismemberment, two times he planned to poison, and one where he found out about Dazai-san's ability and somehow plotted a way to kill him with that, in just two sentences.

Ryu was once again slightly scared for, and by, Atsushi.

He brushed off dust and cleared his throat, returning his thoughts to the original conversation.

"Using my distracted state of mind to attack was... smart. However, please stop trying to rip apart my coat. Even if it was Dazai-san's first, it is still high quality. Probably is worth more than a spleen. No, you will not sell your spleen for money."

Atsushi crossed his arms and... pouted. The grey-haired boy glared at a part of the coat he had managed to damage, one of his sleeves, with just his teeth alone. Ryu eyed Atsushi warily, like one would with an estranged stray cat.

"Now that I know how much you already know, which is honestly close to nothing," he ignored the offended squawk, "I can train you properly. You are quite better at dodging than fighting, but this will be fixed with time.

"But first," He grabbed into one of his back pockets, and somehow pulled out a large bento. Where did it come from? Nobody knows. Magic pockets, most likely. "Feeding time."

He tossed the bento to Atsushi, who took it with a hungry sparkle in his eyes. Almost immediately, he devoured nearly everything in the bento, licking his hands clean after. Ryu would be disgusted if it was not the same thing he had done when presented with his first paycheck. He bought and ate everything he could and had to throw up afterwards.

It was still worth it.

Ryu sat down next to Atsushi. "Don't eat too fast, you'll throw up." He mentioned bluntly. Atsushi nodded.

"Worth it", he mumbled, then grabbed the thing wrapped in plastic that was leftover in the bento. "What's this?" 

Ryu blinked, appearently having forgotten about Atsushi's lack of knowledge due to the orphanage. Not for the first time, and certainly not for the last time, he cursed them in his mind. "It's candy. You have to unwrap it."

He showed Atsushi how to do it, then gave it to him. Of course, like Atsushi does, he immediately put it in his mouth, and his eyes widened as he ate the candy. "Is this what happiness tastes like?"

Ryu shook his head. "No, that's a cavity."

Atsushi choked.

Chapter Text

Atsushi was not a lucky child.

He had always known this, even young, like when he was born into his birth family where he was nothing more than food a glorified punching bag once he was barely older than an infant.

Yet, he was lucky in the aspect of his brother, a kind, much older boy then him. They suffered, yes, but they suffered together.

(Kind touches helping his parent-caused wounds, soft spoken words instead of the scathing ones his birth-givers used, purple eyes telling him everything will be alright even as the voices outside started banging on their door.)

He still can't tell if his parents throwing him out one night while nii-san was out was considered luck or not, but thought he was lucky at the time that at least his brother would be able to escape without a liability, and that Atsushi finally wasn't getting hurt every day.

The next time his luck failed Atsushi was when the headmaster saw him and apparently thought, 'that looks like a great child to hurt!' and his brief happiness was gone once again.

Nails to the leg, drowning, the basement, all completely normal punishments done to him on a regular basis in the orphanage. Really, Atsushi thought bitterly, weren't orphanages made to protect children?

After Ryu came, Atsushi was finally happy again, even if the requirement for being happy was being needed to be punished and chained outside for the night first.

(Ryu reminded Atushi of Nii- san at first , but the more they hung out, he realized just how different his two brothers were. Ryu has beautiful dark eyes, but they could never match the beautiful purple that was his brother's.

Then the whole... Shibusawa incident happened, and once again kami decided that him being happy, even briefly, was a terrible idea. And the punishments got even worse.

Even though Chuuya-san did keep visiting. He said it was to 'see what his subordinate was up to' but Atsushi can see, and Chuuya-san cannot hide the worry whenever he looks at Atsushi's rapidly healing wounds.

So, where were we? Right, Atsushi's almost complete lack of luck. It was rearing it's ugly head again in form of Atsushi being accused of stealing... something.

He wasn’t even sure what he had apparently stolen! Some younger kids simply pointed to him while he was walking by and the orphanage workers believed them with no doubt, happy to punish the monster in their midst. 

The two orphanage workers turned a deaf ear as always that he had not done anything, and they simy grabbed him roughly, cursing him out loudly. Atsushi, at this point knowing not to fight back, simply went along, ignoring the hushed whispers of nearby children most likely gossiping about him and what he had done wrong again.

Atsushi gulped when he realized they were heading towards the headmaster's office, and yelped when they opened the door and harshly threw him inside. He could barely brace himself before hitting the cold, splinter-inducing floor. Sharp wood dug into his barely clothed knee, ripping his pants. 

Great, have to find even more clothes now, he could barely even think before a hand hit his face and slapped him. He hissed in pain and drew back, looking up at three murderous forms. Oh, he had missed something, hadn't he?

"Well, if you refuse to answer, we can get the answer out of you in other ways." The headmaster hissed, "Hold him down."

The two other adults held him by his arms and, no matter hoe much he thrashed, they harshly held on and he couldn’t move. Even when his thrashing grew more frantic as the headmaster pulled out a metal stick that was glowing out of the fire, they didnt let go.

Even as blinding hot pain exploded across his body he could barely move, the only other thing he could feel was his throat starting to close up and warm tears rolling down his cheeks. 

He opened his eyes, meaning to plead, and instead sees the hot metal coming towards him once again.

Panicked, he launched himself backwards, and at the refusal of letting go from the adults that were holding him, sudden strenght flowed through his libs and he leapt up, breaking free with one hand swiping at one of the orphanage workers with surprisingly dharp nails. 

The adult that got attacked let go with a yell, and Atsushi leapt towards the door, slamming against it. The headmaster grabbed him again, and in a moment of utter adrenaline-fueled panic, he awiped at him too.

Fresh, warm blood landed on his face and tongue, and the headmaster screamed, clutching his bloody face, like Shibusawa had right before he-

Atsushi took the chance and bolted, movements on autopilot as he ran, out the headmaster's office's door, into the halls, passing by shocked kids, out the orphanage and passing by the chains. He didn't stop running until he was somewhere far away, and then only collapsed.

Sleep soon overtook him, and the scent of blood followed him into his dreams.

...

He really was not lucky.

Chapter Text

He's gonna starve to death.

That's Atsushi's only thought right now, and how could he even think about anything else, when the pain in his gut is so intense, so piercing? Sure, he'd gone through his fair share of starvation in the orphanage, but he'd been injected with nutrients occasionally.

After he had gotten lost in that forest, he decided he really couldn't go back to the orphanage anymore. Not only because he would probably be killed as next punishment, but also because he was absolutely lost.

He had already tried looking around and sniffing with his enhanced senses, but it had rained recently and, somehow, he had gone extremely far.

This is also why he had not gone to wait for Ryu and then gone with him. Atsushi hopes Ryu isn't too worried about his sudden disappearance.

Anyway, he just kept walking in one direction, and eventually ended up in a city called Yokohama, if the signs were of any tell. He did try looking for jobs, but nobody would hire a dirty 16 year old and they all did not give him anything more than a few coins at best and an attempt to hit with a broom (really, he is not a cat!) at worst. That's how he ended up here a few weeks later; at the river, contemplating stealing to get money to survive. He watches motorbikes and cars pass by, the army, and then - gurgling?

He looks to the river and sees... legs? Maybe a dead body? But then it wouldn't gurgle, not in that way at least, and there was not a lot of debris on the body yet, and the mud on the shoes had not washed off either, so injuries or blood would still be visible if it was a dead body. And it didn't seem like it was a drowned person either.

Did somebody fall into the river? No, probably not, otherwise-

Atsushi hit himself on the head, then regretted it almost immediately as his headache worsened. 'No! Atsushi, focus. There's a person drowning!'

And then he jumps in, remembering far too late that he has no idea how to swim.

Well, the tiger probably won't let him drown.

---

He sputtered, coughing up water and breathing heavily. The body seemed to belong to a - presumably - man, one that was covered in bandages for some reason - wait, it couldnt be that person, right? No, it was probably just a coincidence. Don't push him back in the water, Atsushi!

Despite the great urge to commit a murder, he checked on the person. And got headbutted in the process, as he suddenly sat up.

"Ow! Hey, um, sir? You alright there?"

The person stared a bit, before he grumbled. "Damn, I made it."

Got it in two, Atsushi. A suicidal person. Did you really think your luck was gonna take a turn for the better?

"Um, sorry?" Atsushi said, still rubbing his head where he had been headbutted. Somewhere in his mind, Byakko chuffed, amused by the interaction.

The situation was only funny to one out of three. Not even 'one out of three people' because Byakko was not a person.

She seemed offended at that. Atsushi counts it as a win.

"Well, it's fine!" The brown haired guy says, and Atsushi has a sudden feeling of dread as the man says he did not want to interrupt anyone's day, that he is is hungry, his partner shows up and yells at him, and the feeling of dread is proven right as the man introduces himself.

"My name is Dazai. Dazai Osamu."

---

He had somehow kept his expression perfectly schooled, if the lack of surprise at the pure bloodlust threatening to pour over him is of any say. So now he was sitting at a table with a person he hates with all his heart, and that person's partner.

Has he ever mentioned his terrible luck before?

Chapter Text

It was dark outside already, and a mostly clear night, the stars only not shining due to the light pollution of the bright city. A lot of people were still up despite the time, and Atsushi had eyed them nervously at first, before dismissing them in favor of eating.

The trio had travelled from the river to a restoraunt nearby, and as promised, Atsushi had gotten tea on rice. As much as he wanted, and the food even came with a free show! That is, the show being Dazai and Kunikida, one scolding the other while he was dismissive.

"This book isn't just my schedule!", Atsushi listened in, making sure nothing truly important was being said while he munched on his free food. Not free for Kunikida, but free for him. Byakko grumbled happily at the food, always up to free things. That included stealing, as Atsushi one night had to find out. However, we do not talk of that Incident.

He watched the argument continue, Kunikida looking close to snapping. "Yohv feshd em ot of rvrs bfohr?", the 16-year old asked, not having swallowed all the food yet. dazai looked confused, and even mroe confused when Kunikida answered, which Atsushi found great,
"Shut up! And nowhere in my ideals book will you find a plan to buy a million bowls of chazuke for a snot-nosed brat!", the blonde hissed, clearly already very miffed.

"Hno-nohe bhrah?" He continued, still not swallowing his food, which got him a mental swipe upside the head by Byakko. He ignored it.

"Like I said, it's a job." The other continued, waving his arms and looking away in annoyance. Dazai continued watching, the confusion on his face slowly morphing into 'I'm done with this life' along side the ever-present confusion. He probably did not understand a thing from their conversation, Atsushi thought.

"Ngam nom namg gomb?" Atsushi leaned forward, curious.

"Our job today?", Kunikida says, for once looking straight at Atsushi while leaning back in his seat. "It involves the military." He must have positive feelings attached to his job, if the way his squirming calms when talking about his position is of any say.

Dazai apparently finally gave up trying to understand them, and simply looked between them another time before blankly asking, "How are you two communicating?"

Other than a glance by the other two, he went ignored.


---

Atsushi leaned back in his chair, probably one of the most comfortable ones he'd ever sat in. However, he had nearly no way of knowing that this was the cheapest chair the staff could find on short notice, because none of them wanted Atsushi to dirty one of their fancy chairs. Not that he would be able to tell what was comfortable or not, considering the tiny stiff chairs the orphanage had.

"Ah, I'm so full. I don't think I could see another bowl of chazuke for at least ten years.", Atsushi sighed, eyes closed in bliss. He was lying, of course, chazuke was his one and only.

(The staff workers sighed in relief, and told their chef to stop working on the other three bowls they had planned to prepare.)

Kunikida growled, full on growled, what the f- heck? Turns out he was not the only weretiger here, "You, you dare be so shameless after eating using my money?"

Atsushi grinned in secret, then turned it into a soft, thankful smile. He really did have to thank the idealistic man, he still had manners, after all. Not to mention he was truly thankful.

"You're a real lifesaver.", he said, voice low. "After I got... kicked out", he decided not to share his background yet, though they probably would find out one way or another, "and had come to Yokohama, I had no food and no place to sleep. I thought I'd die an untimely death.", Atsushi joked. He ignored Dazai's caluclating, and Kunikida's worried gaze, instead focusing on making his thanks sound as sincere as possible. He blushed in embarrassment.

"Sorry about your current predicament, then." Dazai said softly, leaning forwards and leaning on his crossed hands. Atsushi bristled slightly, but managed to give a wobbly smile. He couldn't help leaning backwards, though.

"Dazai." The blonde continued once the brunette's gaze slid over to the blonde. "We are not some altruists going around and helping every kid down on their luck, okay?" Atsushi's eye twitched at the wording. "Let's go back to the job at hand." He waved a fly away with his ideals book.

Atsushi inclined his head in curiosity. "You said earlier that your job involved the military? In what way, if I may ask?" He tilted his head at the adults.

Dazai was the one to answer this time, smiling, but it looked wrong on his face, just there as attempt to make Atsushi ease up. It did the opposite. "Oh, we're just detectives."

The grey haired boy couldn't help his reaction this time, and his amatrine eyes snapped to Dazai in suspicion. What...

Detectives, really? Wouldn't they be the ones to find out the quickest about his past occupation? Except, maybe they already knew...? But it didn't seem like it, considering he would be in jail in that case...

Atsushi had too little info to piece it together yet, so he covered up his suspicion with a shocked smile. "Really? I couldn't have guessed!" He looked back over at Kunikida to avoid Dazai's curious face. "So, what do you do? Like, find lost dogs or pets?" He joked, hoping to cover up his mistake.

It seemed to work with Kunikida, though the man beside him was still watching him with a scrutinizing face. "No, it's a bit more complicated than that." The blonde sighed, massaging his temples. "We're the Armed Detective Agency, an organization with supernatural detectives. Perhaps you've heard of us."

Atsushi froze.

He had to be very, very careful here. Not only were they detectives, but ability-users too? If they found out he was using his ability in his spare time... Well, there's a reason he does not trust adults, not even Chuuya-san, despite being friendly to both him and Ryu all the time.

He decided to play ignorant. In case they did find out about his ability, he can pretend he was locked in the basement for most of his life and did not know of the laws.

…

Well, no need to pretend. That makes it easier. Byakko huffed encouragingly

Briefly, he recalled everything he knew about the armed detective agency; there were a lot of rumors about them, but he only knew a few that were definitely true, such as that most of the agency members possessed abilities, and that they were entrusted the higher-risk missions that the police and military couldn’t handle. Not only that, but they worked in the twilight, meaning some of their ways of action weren’t the most… legal.

Now, considering ‘most of the agency members’, did this include the men in front of Atsushi?

He put on a thoughtful expression, and watched the two in front of him closely. Dazai definitely had an ability, he knew this after some late-night prodding between Ryu and him, but Kunikida…

He scanned the man, watched how familiar the man was with writing in his book, the ripped-out pages, which doesn’t seem usual for perfectionist man like Kunikida… Not to mention the slight respect he can see in Dazai’s posture when he talks to him.

Hm. Interesting. 

Too little information. Guess he would just have to keep watching.

“Hey, Kunikida, look at that beam up there!”

Atsushi looked up, seeing the piece of wood in question. He knew immediately what Dazai wanted, and watched exhaustively as the brunette lied to Kunikida, resulting in a pen snapped and the blonde yelling at him again.

A slight furrow came over his brows. Really, he knows its Dazai, and everyone wants him dead, but isn’t this guy at least a little concerned?

…

Ah, there it was. That concerned glimmer, briefly in his eyes before it’s masked by anger and scolding. Seems like he was also good at hiding, though not good enough for Atsushi’s watchful eyes. Maybe it was an Armed Detective Agency trait? More questions, too little answers.

“-I’ll finish this job even if it’s the last thing I do!” The blonde finished his rant, still shaking Dazai’s limp body around.

Atsushi sheepishly raised his hand. “Um, about your job-”

Kunikida’s furious eyes were now on him, and he didn’t even try to mask his flinch this time. “Nevermi-”

“WHAT.” Kunikida hissed, and Atsushi scooted further backwards in his chair, nervously holding his hands up in a placating gesture. Byakko growled in his mind, and Atsushi agreed. An adult’s angry eyes being set on him was never a good idea. Quick, what could get him to calm down… Right!

“U- uh, don’t worry about it, I’m sure your jobs are classified…”

The blonde was back in his seat in a second, Dazai still reeling from being shaken around harshly. Atsushi mentally congratulated himself. So he did get it right that Kunikida absolutely loved his job, if that’s what got him to calm down so quickly. “This job doesn’t really require secrecy. We’re looking for a man-eating white tiger that's apparently been seen around these parts recently.”

He doesn’t hear anything else, nodding along outwardly as the bandaged one of the two continued explaining.

A… man-eating white tiger?

That- That was Atsushi! Or, more like Byakko. But still!

And from Dazai’s knowing eyes, he knew it too.

…

He had to get out.

Chapter Text

Atsushi’s breath hitched, eyes tracking the bandaged brunette. The blonde had not noticed, but Dazai certainly had. And, if what Ryu had told him was true, which was very likely, he had already half figured him out.

Dazai was, to be frank, extremely smart, and almost as observant. He had been the youngest port mafia executive after all, and Atsushi would not be able to beat him in a fight either, whether it was a mental fight or a physical one.

Now, back to the 'almost' as observant.

Despite being analytical and having great tactics, Dazai was not as observant as Atsushi.

Atsushi, who had the tiger’s senses and more than a decade and a half of trauma to back up his observations, not to mention how observant he had learned to be through… other sources.
There was a chance, as small as it may be, that Atsushi could fool Dazai, the Dazai Osamu that terrified even the strongest humans on the planet. So.

He had to be quite careful here. Right now, it was probably best to play into Dazais expectations, proving him right that Atsushi was quite good at hiding but not better than the bandaged brunette, and it would be fine as long as he does not find out anything else about him.

As long as you play into people's expectations of you, they won't see you as anything more than their conception of you. You might go through an entire character arc but, once you prove them right once, that you are the naive little child, their subconscious will automatically accept this as the right answer, always, forever.

It would be fine.

So, he did what Dazai thought he would do, and froze up entirely, even adding tiny shivers to his already shaking hands.

“A- A man-eating tiger? Um, I have to go-” 

Just as expected, he was immediately stopped.

Kunikida scrutinized him through his glasses, one hand preventing Atsushi from leaving by grabbing onto his scruff, picking him up like a cat. “You know something, don’t you?”

Atsushi looked back, throwing all of his horrified feelings to the front, letting it show in his eyes as he attempted to get away further. He was thrown to the floor in retaliation and held down with one eye to the back, which was supposed to hurt, but Atsushi had gone through much worse.

After Dazai and Kunikida fought a little more over if breaking somebody's arm was morally wrong or not, the bandaged man crouches by Atsushi and asks, “so, what do you know about this tiger?”. Atsushi was relieved to see that the other did not seem surprised by his actions, rubbing his released arm as if it hurt.

“My orphanage was decimated  by that tiger.” He simply says, which was technically not a lie. Though, now he had to reveal his origins, as vague as they were. Dang.
“Some of the orphanage staff and kids were getting hurt. It basically killed off all our chickens and destroyed our fields.” Atsushi mumbles. He had decided to keep the events of him being involved out of the picture. Maybe they’d let him go now?

A faint image of church-like windows flashed through his mind at the reminder of his previous home, and Byakko chuffed encouragingly in return.

“Where were you the last few days, before you came to Yokohama?” The bandage waster chimed in, blank eyes scanning the secret ability user.

“Huh? Well, I think some sign said Tsurumi or something…” Atsushi said, then froze, inside of his mind cursing everything out. He had done a mistake.

“How strange,” Oh no. Please don’t. “The tiger was seen around Tsurumi as well, and he seemed to vanish from the orphanage around the same time you did.” Atsushi wished he knew more curse words than the language allowed at this point. “Seems it was following you around.”

The gray-haired boy took a calming breath, before playing up his fear. Somehow, he did not manage to get out of the situation at hand, and it turns out that Atsushi really needed money, because, to both Byakkos and his horror, they met up in an almost empty warehouse at night.


—


A ship was leaving the port  nearby, if the loud sound that pierced the night were of any say. The tiger boy watched Dazai, eye-ing the cover of the book he was reading. Honestly, he did not even want to know. Not even how he was reading in this darkness.

“Wondering what I’m reading?” The brunette peered over the book, soulless eyes meeting sunset ones. “It’s quite the good book.”

Atsushi smiled awkwardly, tilting his head as if in curiosity. “Ah, I’m just surprised how you can read when it’s this dark.”

Dazai also smiled. “I have good vision. Oh, and I’ve already memorized this book.”

…

Atsushi blinked at the title of the book once more. “Why are you reading it then?” Some stupid conversation was probably better than sitting in silence for eternity.

“A good book is always good, no matter how many times you read it.” Oh, finally the stupid brunette says something wise, for once in his life. But, strangely, Atsushi had to agree.

There was a book in the orphanage he’d liked to read. So much, that he had read it almost every day he was allowed in the library. Sometimes, he’d even sneak into the library just to read it, he’d liked it that much.

The book was a story about two people, one stuck in something illegal, and when the other tried to help him, he’d been shot dead. It’s quite the sad story, but something about it made Atsushi reread it again and again.

It’s very sad that the book was probably coated in blood right now, considering the headmaster took it away when he was re-reading it one day, and put it in his office. He ignored the phantom pain that exploded once again around his side. Even with the tiger’s healing ability, the burns had left a deep mark.

“I agree.” He said finally. “...Do you really think the tiger will show up here?”

“Yes. And it will be of no match to me. I may not look like much, but I can handle my own.”

“...”

The silence continued for a while, before Dazai lifted his head, looking up at the clearing sky. “Well then, I think it’ll be soon.”

Atsushi breathed in sharply, counting the days. It was… Tuesday now, wasn’t it? Oh…. Oh no.

He had done another mistake.

As he stared up at the very full moon, he cursed extremely loudly, bathing briefly in Dazai’s startled look.

“Oh.” The brunette smiled slowly. “Oh. You know, don’t you?”

He let out all of his angry emotions and put it into his glare, an animalistic growl ripping from his throat.

Blue light filled the warehouse, and Byakko took up the front of his mind.

He could only hope nothing bad happened while he took a break.

Chapter Text

Akutagawa Ryunosuke was quite worried. 

This was not a very common occurrence, as the only thing that really worried him at this point was if that one raid was gonna go well or not. Because, as unsafe as Atsushi was in that orphanage, there was barely any way for him to die due to the tiger.

..or that's what he previously thought.

Now, standing in front of the orphanage doors with the putrid smell of blood reaching him, he felt quite faint.

Of course, he reasoned with himself, it could just be another one of Atsushi’s punishments. That thought however, didn't make him feel better at all. It made his stomach turn.

Because there was a faint scent of death.

Making up his mind, Ryunosuke stepped through the gates and entered.

The smell of death immediately intensified, and to his surprise, there was no noise at all. Maybe he should have heard children giggling or adults running, but there was nothing at all. It was quite ominous, but it felt perfect for the orphanage.

He kept walking through the corridors, deeply unsettled, and thinking of the worst. What if they had finally killed Atsushi?

He kept going.

Ryunosuke followed some faint, worn down signs placed on the walls towards the headmaster’s office, expecting nothing good, really.

And nothing good he got.

He stood in front of the office’s door, glaring at the blood seeping through Rome under it. And Blood really was staining almost everything, even with the door closed like this.

Ryunosuke could also faintly make out thin claw marks, like a certain tiger boy had tried to escape, or had hopefully escaped. Taking a deep breath, which he immediately regretted as he coughed, Ryunosuke entered the office, and grimaced at the sight before him.

A corpse lay on the ground before him, eye scratched through enough that the bone was visible. Other tears in his white fabric coat were clearly visible, and he was coated in blood. The red liquid seemed to be a little old, but not all that much. Whatever had happened had probably happened only a day or two ago. 

And that was probably also the headmaster. Ryunosuke ignored his rage bubbling to the surface.

Another, still somewhat living human being sat in a corner, hunched over with blood coming out of their wounds, the most notable ones the gouges in their legs. Their fingers were coated in blood and lay limply next to them. But shallow breaths were signs of life, so he decided to interrogate them.

“Hey.” He stepped in front of the orphanage worker. They seemed to wake and looked up in hope of rescue, but their expectations were quickly crushed to bits when they saw the look on his face. “What happened here?”

Hoping for help if they were as honest as possible, the orphanage worker quickly spilled.

—

As Ryunosuke listened to the stuttered, weak explanations of the worker, his distaste of the orphanage grew and grew.

The black haired man had known that the orphanage was terrible, but really? Pressing an extremely hot iron to a child’s abdomen just because he had stolen a single candy? And from Atsushi's character, Ryunosuke knew that he had not actually stolen the candy, he was most likely just blamed for it.

And, of course, Atsushi didn't like that, neither did Byakko, so they seemed to merge for a moment, killing the headmaster and allowing Atsushi to escape.

Now, Ryunosuke was extremely worried.

No matter how good Byakko's regeneration is, it must still take a while to heal. Not to mention experiencing that. 

Atsushi was in danger.

As quickly as possible, Ryunosuke stepped outside, ignoring the pleas for help back in the orphanage office, and walked to the chain post where Atsushi and him had met almost every night.

With only a bit of hesitation, he let Rashomon come to the surface, and destroy the chains that once bound Atsushi.

It felt strangely symbolic.

Gaze lingering on the destroyed chains for a while longer, he reached for his phone as if on autopilot, and dialed a familiar number.

“...Chuuya-san?”

“Yes, something happened. Can we meet?”