Work Text:
Y/n
Say, Jake...
How much of my phone did you look through?🤔
That was the only warning Jake would get. He raised his eyebrows, wondering if this question was a subtle hint for a specific answer or random.
I am not certain what you are trying to ask me, Yn.
His fingers hovered, his teeth gnawing at the insides of his cheeks.
Well, did you go through more than just my chats?
It was a guided question. A glance at the time in the corner of his screen, he wondered why you were still awake.
I was forced to make sure your devices would be secure.
For obvious reasons.
And what did you look at to make certain my phone was safe?
Which you already told me wasn't
No need to point it out again
No need to make a point of it again
I can already smell that you want to scold me for it😑
A short laugh erupts from his throat. Dry. He reaches for the can of energy drink and smiles again. It's almost like he can see you rolling your eyes.
I will refrain from doing so.
To return to your question...
I have not looked through anything but the relevant chats in our investigation.
Jake bites his lips, his fingers hovering once more. But before he can decide what to say next, you beat him to the chase.
Okay good
😮💨
I'm glad.
Curiosity blooms in the back of his mind and now his fingers type determined over the keys.
If I may inquire...
Why do you ask?
The pause is long. Prolonged. Awkward and he is tempted to take it back before the tiny pen next to your profile picture begins to move.
Well...
Because...
Uh...
You see...
There might have been things that are...
Private?
Another prolonged pause follows but this time because Jake can't bring himself to respond. Suddenly his motel room felt too hot, small, and suffocating. Why was there no air?
His cheeks were burning, hot, and feverish as Jake tried to squeeze all the wrong images out of his mental eye and bury them into the deepest vault of his mind.
Jake?
I DON'T HAVE NUDES!!
PLEASE TELL ME YOU DIDN'T THINK THAT!?
A relieved and shy cough echoes through the room. His hand clasps his chest as he's thrown out of his momentary improper excursion.
I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have assumed.
😑😑😑😑
😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑
If I had I would have to gauge your eyes out for seeing that.
Jake allows himself another smile. He likes your occasional morbid humor. He can't agree more. He wouldn't be able to stand the guilt if he ever saw something so... private. Intimate.
Don't worry.
However, he can't deny that he's curious now. What were you worried about he could have seen?
Is there something troubling you?
The curiosity got the better of him and before he knew it, he had posed the question. He doesn't expect you to answer it, though.
No
I honestly don't know about all the things I have on my phone
So, I wanted to delete some things
And I found a few embarrassing things...
Embarrassing things? Jake would never so openly express his curiosity but somehow his toes started to tingle and his lungs fluttered, hope igniting. He leans back against the headboard of the bed, his laptop propped on his stomach. Giddy like a teenager he stared and anticipated the icon of your impending message.
Just admit, you want to know😏
Maybe I'll tell you
If you want to
I won't force you.
His typical coyness and reservations set in even though it doesn't matter what you would tell him. He wants to listen. Read.
He wants to know.
He wants to keep talking to you.
Come on😩
I'll tell you then
I found some audios
A brow quirked. What were you getting at?
Audios?
Audios.
Jake can feel how you're trying to bribe him to ask what those audios contain. He sighs. He would take the bait.
What do those audios contain, Y/n?
My laughter 😂😂😂
Jake paused. What? Your laughter? Like when you listen to a joke?
Can you please elaborate?
I don't think I understand.
Just that, Jake🙃
The ugliest laugh to exist on this earth
And then he starts to laugh, a loud and bubbling sound that shook his chest and shoulders. Heat traveled from his neck to his cheeks, his muscles aching with such a painful smile, that he wondered if he wasn't imagining the hurling snort that escaped him.
Jake?
Are you still there?
Your laughter is that bad?
Bad isn't putting it right
Wait
I'll show you
♧♧
Jake felt embarrassed by his intent. He scolded himself every evening for this and yet he returned to the conversations he held with you over his messenger app. It felt almost soothing. Rereading your words, imaging your voice and face and how you would say them live. It lulled him to sleep and overshadowed his loneliness.
"What are you doing, Jake," he asked himself as he scrolled through your conversations. He knew your every answer by heart. And his own. But his own were the cause of my embarrassment.
Suddenly his index finger paused over his mouse pad. Online screamed the letters under your name back at him. What? Why were you still awake? It's well past midnight.
Y/n
Y/n?
Hi, Jake...
Something told him that there was something wrong.
Is everything alright?
It is very late.
I have a problem
Jake
I'm scared
The color drained from his pale face, a cold sweat running down his spine.
Tell me what is wrong, Y/n.
No answer. The online mocked him and Jake's anxiety spiked until his fingers felt frozen and numb.
And then his heart stopped abruptly when the screen changed, your name shining like a warning sign on the screen. You were calling. Automatically he hung up your call.
Come on, Jake!
I'm shit-assed scared!
He exhaled tensely. Why could you not tell him over text? He called you back, waiting - you picked up on the first ring, your sleep-drunken face the first thing he got to see. Your room was in full light, not a typical ambiance for the time.
You couldn't see him but you barely seemed troubled by the lack of face or answer.
"Jake, oh my God..."
His heart jumped for two reasons. Because you were chewing your nails and mumbling like you really were terrified and because he heard you say his name. With your voice.
"You won't believe it..."
Jake sat up, his heart pumping like a mad drum.
"There is the fattest grasshopper in my room," you whispered. "Directly over my bed."
Before Jake could comprehend what you said, he was faced not with a faceless murder, or blackmail message but a palm-sized, six-legged grasshopper.
"Jake, I'm scared! It's so big!" You cried into the speaker. Your hair was all messy, and your cheeks flushed. "Help."
"I..." You could hear his distorted voice and yet he was so absolutely lost for words. You were scared of an insect. You weren't threatened by a murder or received another threatening call. There was a grasshopper in your room.
"It's so fucking big and it moved...! What should I do?"
Warmth spread in Jake's chest, his cheeks morphing into a smile. You called him because you had a bug in your room. You called him.
"I can't sleep with this hoe over my head. What if he crawls over my face and lies eggs into my mouth?"
Oh my God. Jake could barely hold it but tried because he didn't want to laugh at you.
"Eww, it moved! Jake, help! I'm scared, I don't want to touch that thing!"
"You... could put him in a glass..." he offered. He never had such an enormous thing in his vicinity.
"But then I have to get super close... what if he jumps in my face?"
Jake had no answer but apparently, you didn't need one.
"Oh, shit. I have to, huh? Or else I have to burn the house. That'd be expensive."
Your screen moved as you glided through your apartment in search of a glass.
"Okay... shit. Oh fuck. Jake, you gotta put some epic soundtrack over this should I die."
Jake snorted. He couldn't stop himself. Your humor and sarcasm had always managed to put a smile on his face but this? This was grin-inducing and he couldn't remember the last time anyone other than you made him grin.
It was comical how you placed your phone, providing a full view as you climbed on your bed, glass in hand like a weapon.
"Okay, you... Frank, let's call you Frank. Can you please not move while I put you into the glass? I just wanna bring you home because this is my home and usually I charge extra. You know? A girl has to earn her money."
Jake leaned closer to his screen as if he was witnessing the discovery of the first human skeleton. You screeched, jumping off your bed and out of his view, assumingly because the creature of your concern moved.
Whines are heard from the other side of the camera and Jake wishes he could be there and remove the nasty insect which dared cause you such distress. You moved back to your bed after some time to catch your composure and started to quote a sort of movie scene Jake didn't know. Could it be a method to calm yourself down?
"'What do you want from me? Please?'... 'I want waffle fries.' Come on, Frank, just piss off. I don't want to murder you. 'It is what it is' and you're disgusting."
Jake saw you shudder before you clasped the glass over the vicious grasshopper Frank and sighed in relief.
"Jake, please tell me you saw that. I just committed the greatest deed of human history."
Fondness reflects on Jake's screen and he realizes it's his reflection. And he's still smiling.
"I'm proud of you, Y/n," he said in his distorted voice.
You give him a thumbs up before you manage to wring yourself to part the glass from the wall and quickly spin the lid on. Jake imagined kissing you.
He blushed at the thought, hiding his face behind his palms as if he was afraid you could somehow see his face. He wanted to kiss you for catching the grasshopper.
♧♧
Y/n
Jake?
Are you awake?
I can't sleep...
Sorry
I'm probably bothering you
I am still awake.
You are not bothering me, Y/n.
:)
:)
What are you doing?
I am working on improving Nymos.
Is there a reason you can't sleep?
If only I knew 🤷
God didn't bless me with an answer
Jake watched the prolonged pause hold. Somehow he has the incline that you are trying to say something. He's getting better. Thanks to you he's slowly starting to learn to read you through your messages alone.
I suppose I was lonely
His heart made a funny jump. He knew that feeling all too well. It has lingered around his person for the past four years. And yet, there were flickers where the dark lonely sludge vanished, as if a snap made it evaporate. Like right now.
I know what you mean, Y/n.
If you want, I can talk with you until you fall asleep.
Really?
I thought you were busy
It is fine.
Okay...
If you say so
You paused again but this time you seemed to contemplate a topic of conversation.
Do you know why eggplants are called eggplants?
Jake chuckled. He was fascinated by the way your mind worked. It always seemed to jump between intuitions and thoughts of a different time. You were both a deep thinker, with creative ideas and great intuition, and yet also the most random person he ever witnessed. Your humor was both morbid and comical. To Jake, the contrast feels almost healing. It brings him back to simpler times.
No.
I do not know.
It must be your charm that made him want to know why eggplants are named eggplants.
Because when you roll an eggplant with a rolling pin and cut the end, the juice looks and feels like egg white.
Surprised, his brows rose. That... he didn't know.
I didn't know.
Thank you for telling me.
Sorry that was probably boring
It was not.
:)
Is there something else interesting you wish to share?
Uhm...
I managed to explode a pot lid?
What?
It was these conversations that made Jake wonder how you weren't a comedian.
Yeah
It just sorta exploded in my hands
Just like that
Was it still hot?
No
Not that I remember
The water wasn't cold either
It just
💥
What did you do then?
I ordered a new one🙈
You know what?
I ordered new books today
A trilogy that is
And the last book is way bigger than the other ones
Like a totally different format
Who decided that??
Haha.
Jake let you ramble for another two hours. You never seemed to run out of topics as if you couldn't wait to share every minute of your day with him. And Jake sucked every irrelevant information in as if was another hundred digits of pi.
He didn't want you to stop. No matter if you told him about the color of your walls or the plans you had for tomorrow alongside your investigation.
Jake imagined being there. Watching the way your mouth moved and your eyes crinkled when you giggled or your hands moved when you were exasperated.
He wanted it all. Wanted to know more about the calls you had to take tomorrow and were nervous to place. He wasn't aware that you were scared to answer stranger's calls or call someone and that you had been anxious the first time you received a call from him. He was tempted to apologize to you.
Desperation clawed at him. Desperation for your words. Your presence. He imagined touching your skin and face and your fingers touching his.
This pain of loneliness was an unwanted visitor, strangling his neck and burning in his throat. Jake never felt this desperate longing before you. He studied the people passing him with envy but never did he long so badly.
Only then Jake realized that you haven't given him any new fun facts for a while.
Y/n?
Is everything okay?
Yeah
Sorry
Sleepy
A sigh of relief untensed his body. You were just tired. He should let you sleep. You needed it and you finally felt tired enough to slumber.
Don't worry, Y/n.
You should sleep.
You need your strength.
👍
You should sleep too
He nodded. You couldn't see him and yet he moved as if you were right there, warming the space next to him on the mattress.
Hey Jake
Thanks for listening to my bullshit
Jake watched in sadness as online shifted to offline. He turned his laptop off then too and rolled on his side, sighing when the space he reached for was just as empty as always. His eyes fell shut and Jake tried to imagine the way you described you always imagined the world a little brighter. His brightness was with your smile.