Work Text:
Suguru feels sick to his stomach. He knows he should help Satoru, should help him get up, should get him to Shoko somehow, but his hands shake and the rest of his body feels as if it’s frozen in ice.
“Suguru, a little help here,” Satoru says, his voice tight with pain as he holds out his hand.
Suguru is supposed to take it, to haul him up and then help him walk but he can’t do anything.
Except stare at Satoru’s leg, at the angle it’s in and the only thing he can currently hear is the awful sound it made as it snapped.
It shouldn’t have.
Satoru is supposed to be invincible; he’s supposed to be untouchable.
He’s not supposed to break his leg.
“Suguru,” Satoru snaps now, clearly more annoyed than in pain and Suguru jerks. “Help me up, goddamit,” Satoru grumbles, waving his hand around and glaring at Suguru. “I’m not going to get up by myself, so please.”
“Satoru, I—” Suguru starts, unsure how he’s going to explain that he doesn’t feel stable enough to support himself, less alone Satoru.
“What the hell has gotten into you?” Satoru grumbles, leaning forward to take Suguru’s hand in his own when he doesn’t move to help him and even that movement makes him hiss in pain.
Suguru’s heart misses a beat at that and he stumbles when Satoru tries to pull himself up with the grip he has on Suguru’s hand.
“Suguru!” Satoru yells and it makes Suguru blink. “I need to get to Shoko already. She’s going to fix me right back up, okay, so would you just—” He tugs on Suguru’s arm again but the only thing that does is make Suguru fall to his knees.
“You have RCT. Heal yourself,” he says, begs almost, because he cannot continue to stare at that leg of Satoru’s but Satoru only huffs.
“Well, it turns out that pain makes it really difficult to concentrate and apparently instinct doesn’t kick in if I’m not in a life or death situation.”
Suguru almost gags at that; he still remembers the pool of blood at the top of the stairs, still hears Satoru almost gleefully describe just what gruesome injuries he survived and it’s all going to make him sick again.
“Suguru?” Satoru asks, more careful this time and clears realising that something is going on, but still, Suguru has a hard time shaking himself out of those memories.
His own injuries were almost laughable in comparison, and he isn’t as hung up about them as he is about Satoru’s injuries.
“Hey, Suguru, come on now,” Satoru says, much softer now. “Let’s just go see Shoko okay?”
“Sure,” Suguru forces himself to say because Satoru is in pain, can’t heal himself because of it, because he’s hurt and Suguru has to do something about it. “Up you go,” he says, tries to make his voice light and cheerful in hopes to distract Satoru from his behaviour, and for now it works.
Probably only because Satoru has to concentrate on getting up without putting any weight on his injured leg but Suguru is going to take it.
“Alright, onward!” Satoru yells out, as if Suguru is his noble steed that has to be steered on and even though it makes Suguru roll his eyes, he does start to walk, mindful of the way Satoru has to awkwardly hop next to him.
“It’s not as bad as it looks, you know,” Satoru says when they are maybe a quarter of the way to Shoko and Suguru presses his lips together.
It’s exactly as bad as it looks, Suguru thinks, because it looks like a broken leg and that is what it is. In the grand scheme of things it might not be much—especially compared to the injures they sustained before—but it’s an injury nonetheless.
It shouldn’t leave Suguru reeling like this, but that is a thought for another day.
“Whatever you say,” Suguru belatedly gives back and then stops when Satoru almost stumbles. “This would be faster if I could just pick you up,” he says, turning his gaze towards Satoru.
“Piggy-back? Sure, if you think you can carry me all the way,” Satoru glibly says, clearly not believing that at all and Suguru bites his tongue.
Satoru untangles his arm from Suguru, evidently expecting him to crouch down so Satoru can climb on his back, but Suguru simply bends down and picks him up in a bridal-carry.
“Suguru!” Satoru shouts out, flailing around in a way that almost makes Suguru drop him.
“Stop it,” he admonishes him as he starts to walk. “I’m going to drop you.”
“That’s why it should have been a piggy-back ride,” Satoru heatedly gives back and belatedly slings his arms around Suguru’s neck. “Don’t you dare drop me.”
“I won’t,” Suguru confidently says, because for all that Satoru is tall, he’s also lanky as hell. He’s actually not that heavy to carry.
They make it to Shoko in record time and with minimal grumbling from Satoru which Suguru takes as a win. He makes sure to keep his step light and even and to not jostle Satoru at all, so he doesn’t worsen his injury.
“What is this now?” Shoko asks when he walks into her work place and gently lowers Satoru on a chair.
“He broke his leg,” Suguru says, the sound of it now back to playing on loop in his mind and Shoko frowns.
“With Infinity?”
“Well, excuse me, but Infinity only protects me from outward forces.”
“So it’s useless against stupidity,” Shoko sums up and Satoru makes an outraged sound.
Their bickering is so painfully normal that it’s a balm to Suguru’s still shaken nerves and just like Satoru predicted Shoko has him healed up in less than a minute.
“There, all better now,” Shoko says and then taps a finger against her lips as she thinks. “You know, you really have to make healing yourself an instinct, even when your life is not in danger. That’s probably something you have to work on.”
“And how do you suggest I do that?” Satoru asks and just going by the downright wicked grin on Shoko’s face Suguru knows that he’s not going to like what’s coming next.
“I could inflict some minor injuries and make you heal them over and over again,” she gleefully suggests and when Satoru doesn’t immediately protest it, Suguru has to turn away.
“I’m done, good night,” he decides, even though it’s the middle of the day still and before Shoko or Satoru can say anything he marches out on them, almost fleeing back to his room.
He’s still shaken up, more than he’d like to admit or would be able to explain, and he thinks being away from Shoko and Satoru might help in getting himself under control again.
Suguru saw that Satoru was fine after Shoko treated him, saw him stand and walk around, so there’s really no reason for him to still feel as panicked as he does.
He just needs to breathe. In and out, just like Shoko has taught him and then he’s sure things will be fine.
Eventually.
Suguru is still in the process of convincing himself of that when Satoru barges into his room.
He stands firmly on his two legs, clearly has no problems whatsoever walking around and it should put the last bit of worry in Suguru’s mind at ease but it’s not working.
It’s not working because Satoru got hurt and Suguru wasn’t able to prevent it. It’s not working because Satoru is supposed to be invincible, untouchable and yet he got hurt.
Suguru’s breath is becoming increasingly short and fast and Satoru is at his side a moment later.
“Breathe, Suguru,” he coaxes him, puts Suguru’s hands on his chest and takes exaggerated breaths himself.
It takes a long while for Suguru to calm down again and in all honesty it’s not even because of the rhythm Satoru has established. The one thing that really helps is feeling how Satoru breathes, knowing that he’s alive and safe and unharmed.
“Are you feeling better now?” Satoru asks once Suguru’s breathing has returned to normal and Suguru is beyond embarrassed that Satoru had to see him like this so he turns around.
“I’m fine. Just tired. Thanks.” He tries to make his voice as dismissive as he can but of course it has absolutely no effect on Satoru.
“Sure, I totally believe that. What’s going on? It’s not like you to be this shaken by a little injury,” he says and flops down on Suguru’s bed.
“Your leg was broken. That hardly counts as a little injury.”
“It wasn’t life-endangering, so I’d say it was,” Satoru carelessly gives back and even that little comment is almost enough to send Suguru spiralling again.
“Don’t talk like that,” he hisses out and Satoru is visibly taken aback by his vehemence.
“Suguru—”
“Don’t ever even joke about that,” Suguru goes on, not letting Satoru talk. “After Toji—after everything that happened you don’t get to talk like that!”
“I was fine after Toji,” Satoru gives back, sitting back up, clearly noticing that this is more than just a little friendly talk. “I’m fine, Suguru.”
“But you weren‘t,” Suguru presses out. “Gods, Satoru, do you even know how much blood you lost? How much blood I had to find? You were not fine. You died!
“Almost,” Satoru interjects but Suguru barely even hears him.
“And now you have RCT and permanent Infinity and you’re not supposed to get hurt, not anymore, not ever again, I can’t find that much blood ever again, I can’t,” Suguru gasps out, all his careful breathing exorcises from before for naught but Satoru is at his side again a second later.
“I’m fine, Suguru,” he whispers, taking Suguru’s hands and putting one to his chest and one to his throat so he can feel him breathe, so he can feel his pulse and then he stays quiet until Suguru breathes easier.
“But you weren’t,” Suguru repeats and Satoru presses his lips together as he nods.
“I wasn’t, that’s true. But I’m better, I’m good, I promise. Today was—unfortunate,” he says and it’s ridiculous enough to make Suguru huff out a little laugh.
“You could say that,” he mutters and drops his head to Satoru’s shoulder. “You scared me.”
“I know,” Satoru apologetically says and reaches up to undo Suguru’s bun so he can card his fingers through his hair. “I’m sorry.”
“You didn’t do it on purpose,” Suguru gives back because he knows that much at least, no matter how irrational he is about everything else. “I just—I can’t have you hurt like that again. I can’t. I’m not strong enough to lose you.”
“Hey, you’re not losing me any time soon,” Satoru tells him and slings his arms around him. “And even if something were to try and take me away from you, I wouldn’t let it. I’m not leaving you behind, it’s you and me after all, right?”
“It is,” Suguru agrees, slinging his arms around Satoru in turn. “Satoru, I—”
He doesn’t know how to say it, how much this means to him, how much further his feelings go for Satoru, but when Satoru presses a kiss to his head he thinks that maybe he doesn’t have to know the words for it.
Maybe this is enough.
“I know, Suguru, me too,” Satoru softly says and it’s enough to almost make Suguru sob with relief. “That’s why I’m never leaving you, not ever. But the same has to go for you, you know.”
“I’m not the one who nearly died,” Suguru replies and Satoru chuckles.
“Fair,” he agrees and squeezes Suguru tight. “But I’m not going to do it again and you’re not going to leave me and things will be fine like that.”
Suguru has to admit that Satoru might be right; Satoru didn‘t die even though he should have and when Suguru was about to leave him, slaughtered village and abducted kids and all, Suguru didn’t do that either, because the thought of leaving Satoru pierced through whatever haze he had been in at that moment.
And if neither of those things could do the trick, then surely nothing can.
“Okay,” Suguru nods and brushes his lips over Satoru’s throat. “Okay.”
Satoru doesn’t verbally reply but Suguru can practically feel him beam down at him and with Satoru that close, it’s easy for him to breathe easy, to believe everything Satoru tells him.
Things will be okay. With them together, there is simply no other way after all.