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Suguru smiles, watching the scene in front of him unfurl with a great deal of amusement. Shoko is trying to teach Satoru how to heal others, now that he figured out how to heal himself, and it’s going just as well as all three of them expected.
Suguru gives her another five minutes before she attempts to strangle Satoru with her bare hands and claim that maybe a life and death situation is going to speed matters along.
“Gojo, please,” she now says, her voice tightly controlled and she pinches the bridge of her nose. “Would you concentrate for once in your life?”
“I am concentrating,” Satoru shoots back. “It just doesn’t make any sense what you’re saying!”
Shoko takes a deep breath, clearly trying to calm herself down and Suguru honestly feels bad for her. It’s not as if he has any idea what they are talking about, seeing as he is the only one in the room who doesn’t have any kind of healing-power—neither himself nor others—and so to him it’s all gibberish anyway.
“You just have to concentrate,” she reiterates again. “Remember how it feels when you heal yourself,” she says, not for the first time and Satoru throws his hands up in frustration.
“I know how it feels when I heal myself!”
“Then put your hand on my arm and heal this goddamn cut!” Shoko snaps back and maybe Suguru was a bit generous with his estimate of five minutes.
It looks as if she’s about ready to snap any moment now.
“I can’t, why won’t you understand that! It doesn’t make sense when it comes to you, it’s just not the same!”
“What do you mean ‘not the same’? A body is a body!”
“But it’s not,” Satoru whines and slumps in his chair, eying the shallow cut on Shoko’s arm.
Suguru suspects it’s pretty hard for her to keep it open in the first place at the moment and he wonders if that might be one of the reasons she’s so annoyed by Satoru today.
“What do you mean by that? Gods, Gojo, would it kill you to explain yourself once in a while?”
“Things in my body make sense,” Satoru starts, clearly trying to make Shoko understand. “There’s a wound, I do a little—” he wriggles his fingers in what Suguru guesses is a sensible motion because Shoko nods “—and then it’s gone. But I can’t do the same for you. There’s this—barrier or something and everything past that is muddled and muted and confusing and makes no sense at all. I don’t even know where to send my energy to start on healing you and nothing you say makes sense because I don’t feel your body like I do mine.”
“And thank the gods for that,” Shoko mutters before she shakes her head. “But that’s not feasible, Gojo, you have to figure out how to look past this barrier. What if he gets hurt?" Her hand flies up and she points an accusing finger at Suguru, who almost jerks back.
He’s just here to bear witness to this madness, not be dragged in and besides—
“Wow, thanks for the vote of confidence, Shoko,” he drawls out and then very much does not wither under her burning glare.
“We all know neither of you are indestructible. We’ve seen it. So what if Geto gets hurt again, huh? What are you going to do then?”
“Bring him to you?” Satoru gives back and shrugs. “I mean, I can just teleport him to you if it comes to that.”
“It’s not that easy, Gojo. You can’t always assume that an injury will still allow you to move him.”
“Huh?”
“What if he’s impaled on something? What if moving him means exacerbating his injuries? What are you going to do then?”
“I can just come and get you?”
“Don’t be stupid,” Shoko shakes her head. “You know Yaga sends me to Kyoto more often these days. What if I’m not here? Are you going to warp yourself all over Japan just to get me? We all know you can’t do long-distance teleportation—not yet—and even if you could: two times that close together while you’re also transporting another person? It’s unlikely even you can do something like that. And even if, let’s pretend your genius self can figure this out, what about him then? You want to leave him alone, seriously injured on a battlefield? Either with a curse still there or left all to his own? It’s not going to work, Gojo. You have to figure out how to do it, for his sake at least.”
Satoru looks over to Suguru with a frown and Suguru simply shrugs. Shoko isn’t wrong, after all. So many things can go wrong on a mission and there’s no way to predict a situation like this.
“It could also be a matter of time,” Suguru apologetically says, because he knows Satoru hates it when he’s not on his side but Shoko is right. “What if I’m bleeding out? You teleporting all over the place could take too much time. Sometimes it’s a matter of seconds that make a difference.”
Shoko only points at him as if to say ‘What he said’ and Satoru groans.
“Fine, I get it, I do, but that doesn’t change the fact that I cannot figure it out!”
“Then work on it! You learned RCT in a moment of shock to safe your own life. Imagine how you’d feel if he would die, maybe that will help.”
“Please don’t,” Suguru immediately blurts out because while he doesn’t believe in superstitions, it does feel a lot like inviting doom should Satoru imagine something like that.
And Suguru can really do without a near-death experience any time soon.
“Can we just stop for today?” Satoru quietly says, his eyes downcast, and Suguru doesn’t even want to think about what he’s imagining right now. “I promise I’ll work on figuring it out, I promise, but—not today?”
“Fine. Get out of my hair then,” Shoko mutters, waving them off and Satoru is off his chair faster than Suguru can comprehend.
Satoru snatches Suguru’s hand in his and drags him off with him and it’s not as if Suguru is putting up much of a fight, so he easily follows Satoru. He seems lost in his own head and Suguru keeps quiet until they are in Satoru’s room.
“You okay?” Suguru asks once the door is closed behind them and Satoru lets out a shaky breath.
“Don’t get hurt until I figure it out,” he says, his voice almost pleading, and Suguru’s chest suddenly feels tight.
“Satoru—”
“Suguru, just. Don’t get hurt, alright? I will figure it out, I promise you, but until then you cannot get hurt. I can’t—”
Satoru’s breath is coming a bit fast right now and Suguru steps close, resting their foreheads together.
Suguru gets it; he always feels a little bit faint when he remembers just how much blood he found in the spot where Satoru fought and he can imagine that Satoru felt much the same when he heard that Suguru had gotten hurt as well.
“I’m gonna be careful,” Suguru promises him because that’s the only thing he can do.
There’s always a chance in their profession that they are going to get hurt and things in a fight are more than unpredictable but he can at least promise that he’s not going to take any unnecessary risks.
“Please,” Satoru whispers, gripping Suguru’s arm almost painfully and Suguru pulls him into a real hug.
“I promise I’m going to be careful. I’m not going to do anything stupid.”
“Thank you,” Satoru says and deflates where he stands.
Suguru expected it, so he can easily hold Satoru up, but he does shuffle them over to the bed.
Today, they are going to take it easy and then tomorrow they can double down on Satoru’s training. Suguru has all the faith in the world that Satoru is going to figure it out because he’s a genius like that and so he’s not too worried about anything.
It will be fine.
~*~*~
Suguru can barely breathe and he guesses the huge hole in his chest is the reason for it. There’s a lot of red seeping out of him, he distantly thinks and tries to raise a hand to push it back in.
It’s not very successful and Suguru blames his hand for it, because it barely comes up to where he wants it.
“Suguru! Suguru, no!” Suguru hears Satoru yell out and then in the next second the sky is replaced with sky-coloured eyes.
Suguru thinks he might like the eyes better than the sky.
“I’m good,” Suguru says, can barely feel his mouth shape his words and watches how Satoru’s eyes drop to his chest.
“You’re not fine, fuck, what am I going to do?” Satoru cries out and Suguru remembers that he has not yet figure out how to heal other people.
“Shoko,” Suguru says, because he has to.
He’s going cold and things are getting more clear somehow and he knows he has to send Satoru away.
“Get Shoko,” he says again when Satoru doesn’t move and he tries to push his hand away from his chest, but he can’t find the strength to do so.
“Suguru,” Satoru whispers and Suguru blinks.
“No time, Satoru, need Shoko.”
It’s getting harder to form words and he knows in all honesty that he doesn’t have long left. This is it, for him, and he barely spares a thought for himself. The only thing on his mind apart from the fuzziness is the fact that Satoru cannot be here when he dies.
Satoru shouldn’t have to see that.
“I’m not going to make it, we’re out of time,” Satoru gives back, clearly knowing damn well that Suguru will be dead before Satoru is even halfway to Shoko and he puts his hand on Suguru’s chest.
Suguru thinks he might be sick when the wet noise makes it to his ears.
“I’m gonna heal you. I’m panicking, this is a life and death situation, I can totally figure this out,” he mutters and then closes his eyes to better concentrate.
Suguru’s eyes want to drift shut as well but he fights it. If he has to die then he wants Satoru to be the last thing he ever sees.
“You’re not dying on me, shut up,” Satoru says, a touch of hysteria in his voice and Suguru wonders if he said that out loud or if Satoru managed to read his thoughts somehow.
It could be fun, if Satoru were a mind-reader now as well.
“Suguru, stay with me,” Satoru pants out, clearly exerting himself by concentrating really hard and Suguru thought there was a hole in his chest so he doesn’t understand why it’s suddenly burning like that.
“Satoru,” Suguru gets out only to be met with a fierce glare.
“Shut up,” Satoru hisses and Suguru obediently falls silent.
Satoru is clearly doing something and it probably wouldn’t do to interrupt him now.
“You’re not going to die,” Satoru mutters as sweat beads on his forehead. “You’re not. I won’t let you.”
It’s a nice sentiment, Suguru thinks, and then his energy is all used up and the last thing he remembers to do is smile at Satoru.
He deserves at least that much.
~*~*~
Suguru wakes up to Shoko’s face. The sight in front of him doesn’t change, even when he blinks once, then twice and eventually he decides to accept it.
He didn’t expect to see Shoko in the afterlife, but stranger things have happened.
“How did you die?” Suguru asks, his voice raspy and Shoko snorts out a laugh.
“I didn’t, you idiot. Welcome back to the living.”
“Huh?”
“Yeah, you heard me right,” Shoko says and leans back. “You survived.”
Suguru cranes his head down to check out his own chest and he is honestly confused when he finds it whole and unmarred.
There should be a hole the size of his fist in there.
“What happened?”
“Gojo healed you.”
“He figured it out?” Suguru asks and he can’t help how proud he sounds.
He always knew that Satoru would figure it out eventually but to hear that he in fact did somehow hits differently.
“Uhm, that’s probably a conversation you need to have with him,” Shoko says, avoiding eye-contact all of a sudden. “You should feel a little bit groggy, but otherwise you’re good to go. Gojo is probably still sulking in your room, claiming I took too long to clear you to go.”
“I—see,” Suguru mutters because this is all a bit much. He does understand that Shoko wants him out of her hair and so he sits up and swings his legs over the edge of the couch he was laying on.
He feels a little unsteady on his legs when he finally pushes himself off but that feeling fades quickly.
“Thanks, I guess,” Suguru mumbles, waving at Shoko who only rolls her eyes at him.
“Go thank your possessive freak,” she gives back and that only serves to confuse Suguru further.
It takes him a little bit longer than usually, but he does make it back to his own room eventually and just like Shoko promised him, Satoru is right there.
“Satoru,” Suguru breathes out and Satoru is there a second later, fluttering his hands over Suguru’s chest as if he has to make sure that he’s really unhurt.
“Did Shoko clear you?”
“She threw me out, if that’s what you mean,” Suguru replies and then pushes past Satoru towards his bed.
Sitting down does sound kind of nice right now.
“That means you’re good then.”
“She did mention that you healed me?” Suguru asks and leans against Satoru with a sigh when he finally sits down on the bed as well.
“What else did she say?” Satoru asks, fiddling with his fingers and Suguru frowns.
“She called you a possessive freak,” he honestly gives back and Satoru huffs.
“Honestly, what does that woman have against me. That’s so uncalled for.”
“What happened?” Suguru asks and leans more firmly against Satoru. “You figured it out then? Healing others?”
“Not—really,” Satoru whispers and clicks his tongue.
“What is it then?”
“Remember that talk I had with Shoko? Where I said that it’s easy because my body makes sense and then there’s a barrier around everyone else?”
“Yeah?”
“Well—it turns out there’s no barrier around you,” Satoru rushes out and Suguru blinks.
“Huh? You mean I’m—what? Leaking everywhere?”
“No, it’s more like—” Satoru sighs. “There’s my body and then there’s everyone else’s. And you’re more like—my body.”
Suguru takes a moment to digest that.
“That’s what she meant by possessive,” he eventually mutters and drops his head to Satoru’s shoulder. “Because you see me as yours.”
“It’s more like—as if we’re one,” Satoru mumbles, his voice barely audible and Suguru hums. “Are you—mad?”
“About what?” Suguru wants to know because being angry is the furthest thing from his mind right now.
“About—that?”
“Satoru,” Suguru sighs out and reaches out to take Satoru’s hand in his, treading their fingers together. “Apart from the fact that you saved my life—for which I am beyond grateful—it’s always us, isn’t it? Why would I be angry knowing that you feel the same about me?”
“The same?”
“Of course the same. Besides, isn’t it you who always says that I’m your one and only? Don’t you think I would have complained before if I minded that?”
“Probably,” Satoru admits and Suguru shrugs.
“Then I don’t see what there’s to worry about. “I love you. You love me and it’s all like it should be. Especially now that I don’t have a huge hole in my chest.”
“Gods, don’t even say that,” Satoru says with a wet laugh. “You have no idea how scared I was.”
“I can imagine,” Suguru replies, because—again—he had to find so much blood after Toji.
He gets it.
“Now, I am cleared and I am very obviously not dead, but I am incredibly tired, so can we please just lay down?”
“Yeah, of course, sure, come here,” Satoru immediately says, moving away from Suguru to allow him to stretch out on the bed.
Satoru follows him easily but instead of laying down next to him, he almost drapes himself over Suguru, pressing his ear to Suguru’s chest.
“Do you mind?” Satoru asks and Suguru somehow musters the strength to raise a hand and card his fingers through Satoru’s hair.
“Not at all,” he whispers and with a sigh of contentment Satoru goes boneless.
“I do love you,” he says after a long moment, “just wanting to get that out there.”
“I think your actions said that loud and clear,” Suguru replies but he can’t deny that it does feel nice to hear him say it.
“Good. Can’t let you forget,” Satoru mutters and then drifts off to sleep, clearly having worn himself out with his worry.
Suguru is not far behind though and he sleeps very well, knowing that his one and only feels the same.