Chapter Text
(Lute): "Was princess pussy so good you had to betray us?"
(Vaggie, sipping a cup of tea): "Hell fucking yes"
(Rosie, smirking): "The cannibals loved the taste of Angel. It's quite addictive. Though I'm sure you know that already dear."
(Charlie): "😳"
(Angel, staring at Vaggie): "Are you secretly a man?"
(Vaggie): "Excuse me?!"
(Angel): "I mean, you're just so God damn flat chested.."
(Everyone's genders have been swapped.)
(Vaggie, scared as hell): "WHAT THE FUCK"
(Angel, fucking estatic): "This is fuckin' awesome."
(Charlie, staring down at herself): "Well shit"
(Lucifer, completely fine with it): "Huh"
(Vaggie, looking for her phone under the couch): "Fuckkk"
(Charlie, staring at her ass.): "Fuck indeed."
(Zestial): "How are thou?"
(Odette): "I heard you fucking my mother until the sun came up. Sleep deprived, how are you?"
(Angel): "Vaggie, truth or dare?"
(Vaggie): "Truth."
(Angel): "Who tops? You or Charlie?"
(Vaggie): "Fuck you"
(Angel): "Aw, come on!"
(Charlie, drunk asf): "Sometimes I just wanna fuck Vaggie in the middle of the lobby."
(Husk): "Okay..enough drinks you you kid."
(Angel, laughing): "That shit was hilarious."
(Vaggie, surprised as hell): "What did you two do to her?!"
(Carmilla Carmine after episode 7): "Fuck you all, Vaggie is my child now."
(Vaggie): "Hell yeah!"
(Rosie): "Alastor!~ I've got some delicious gossip for you!"
(Alastor): "Hmm?"
(Vox): "I fucking hate Val"
(Velvette): "You love fucking him"
(Lucifer): "Now i am going to FUCK YOU!"
(Charlie): "DAD! Its fuck you up!"
(Alastor): "Excuse me?!"
(Angel, shoving Charlie away): "Finally!"
(Angel): "Wait a damn minute..Vaggie, how old are you?"
(Vaggie): "24"
(Angel): "And what about you, toots?"
(Charlie): "Uhh i dunno, like.. 2,456?"
(Angel): "That shits gotta be a crime somewhere"
(Angel, showing a porno): "One of my best works."
(Charlie, pointing at the screen): "That is unholy! It will not get you redeemed!"
(Angel): "I heard you and Vaggie fucking for 5 hours straight last night."
(Charlie): "..fuck."
(Charlie): "Lute, why do you hate my girlfriend?"
(Lute): "I don't. Think of it as friendly competition but we'd kill eachother."
(Charlie): "..okay"
(Clara): "Where's our mother?"
(Odette): "Getting boned by a spider."
(Lucifer): "You know, you two could have children if wanted"
(Charlie): "Dad, don't you dare.."
(Vaggie): "How exactly would that work?"
(Lucifer): "Well, you see, Charlie can shape shift an-"
(Charlie): "DAD!"
(Lilith): "That's enough out of you.."
(Velvette): "5 dollars"
(Vox): "Nah, definitely 2."
(Valentino): "3 million?"
(Charlie): "Fucking idiot."
(Charlie): "Where the fuck did you come from?"
(Lilith): "Heaven"
(Charlie): "You went to Heaven for seven years?!"
(Angel): "Was it to get rid of Dollface over here?"
(Charlie): "Angel!"
(Lilith): "Indeed it was"
(Velvette): "I fucking hate you"
(Carmilla): "I hate you more"
(Velvette): "Nuh uh, ME!"
(Clara): "Just kiss already!"
(Odette): "Exactly!"
(Charlie): "My asshole hurts"
(Vaggie): "I'd have rather not known that hun."
(Vaggie): "I wanna commit arson"
(Angel): "Im coming with!"
(Lute): "Does it count as arson if It's people?"
(Lilith): "That's murder, Lute."
(Sera): "On a scale from one to ten, how much do you want to fuck one another?"
(Lute): "10"
(Adam): "-300"
(Lute): "Fucking rude"
(Adam): "Wait- TEN?!"
(Sera): "Idiots.."
(Charlie): "Angel, truth or dare?"
(Angel): "Truth"
(Charlie): "Why do you hate my girlfriend?"
(Angel): "I don't. She just has a very punchable face."
(Carmilla, filming): "That's all folks!"
(Lute): "Why do you always have a stick up your ass?"
(Vaggie): "Why are you asking? Do you want to pull it out?"
(Lute): "..nevermind"
(Vaggie): "Exactly"
(Vaggie): "You see, they say killing hellborn is against the rules for exorcists. They never said anything about fucking them."
(Charlie): "This is why i love you"