Work Text:
So Brady keeps every weird and odd thing that DeMarco has said in a little booklet, which he goes back and reads when he's depressed.
He also let other people add things, which make Brady laugh even harder.
DeMarco doesn't know it exists and he never will.
Lets read through it shall we.
DeMarco accidently walking in on Buck and Bucky, he just froze.
DeMarco: "Holy Teletubbies on toast, what is happening in here and why wasn't I invited?"
Both Buck and Bucky just look at each other mouthing what he just said so confused, mostly because what the fuck is a Teletubbie?
---
DeMarco missing the entire planning portion of a mission, because he was spaced out.
DeMarco: "And a what, when, who a fuckin. I'm so lost, Harding please repeat that over."
Brady just looks at him trying not to laugh, mostly because his sunglasses were crooked and the face he was making was ridiculous.
Brady: "Benny you say over, only over the radio, not in real life."
---
DeMarco getting to set extra fuel on fire with Ken and Winks.
DeMarco: "And Fireeeee."
Ken just snorts because he wants whatever DeMarco is on.
---
Hambone cooking for something for his found family, he wanted everyone's honest opinion. But everyone was lying that it was good.
Hambone: "So I roasted it."
DeMarco being DeMarco just stares at his whatever it use to be.
DeMarco: "Roasted in what?! Under a lamp powered by the fucking sun."
---
Curt trying his best in matching his civilian clothes.
DeMarco: "Look everyone it's depressed Mickey Mouse."
Curt looks at himself and just burst out laughing because he wasn't wrong.
---
Murphy loves scaring the crap out of DeMarco because he spits out the most random crap known to mankind.
Exhibit A.
Murphy jumps out of a room, DeMarco nearly jumps out of his skin.
DeMarco: "Jesus tap dancing Christ why? Was that really necessary Frank?"
Murphy bursts out laughing because he feels much better.
---
Curt once again trying his best in dressing himself, he shows DeMarco first knowing he will get a honest opinion out of him.
DeMarco: "Gotta go out with Dickie, looking like a funky fresh lava lamp."
Curt looks at himself laughing under his breath because DeMarco was on the nose.
---
DeMarco once again walking into something he shouldn't be walking into, he leans against the door frame.
DeMarco: "Oh...my...God! Someone's getting kinky in here and without me the audacity."
Bubbles just throws a pillow at him.
---
Douglass doing something ridiculous as he does, DeMarco being his cheerleader in his shenanigans.
DeMarco: "You do that love, you do you whatever makes your heart shine, Hambone is blessed to have you."
Douglass just snorts that was all the encouragement he needed.
---
A half asleep Blakely with bed head strolls right past DeMarco and Rosie, Rosie was trying not to laugh.
DeMarco: "Where's the award for the creepiest bitch? Because Blakely won it, he just scared me so bad, was that Blakely? Or was that Jack wearing a wig? Couldn't tell honestly."
Rosie snorts because he's pretty sure that was Blakely.
---
Babyface found a turtle and just has claimed it as a pet, he shows DeMarco excited.
DeMarco: "That turtle has been hurt, it listens to Bing Crosby daily, I'm pretty sure it keeps a diary."
Babyface begins to wonder what was going on inside DeMarcos head.
---
Part two of Babyface and his pet turtle, he's given it a thing so he can take it outside, without losing it.
DeMarco: "Oh well now you've done it, he's gonna get picked on by the other turtles. Because he looks like a giant bubble wand."
Babyface smacks him for that comment.
---
Crosby being grumpy because he's sleep deprived, DeMarco tried to cheer him up but it doesn't work.
DeMarco: "Welcome to fuck off then, go eat shit and die."
Crosby cracked a smile at that, DeMarco mumbled his victory under his breath.
---
Everyone camping in one barrack because the heat wasn't working, DeMarco trying to make the best out of it.
DeMarco: Welcome back to my corner of the room, I'm making beans, who wants some?"
That gets everyone in a better mood.
---
Blakely explaining his wish to sleep with everyone in the 100th.
DeMarco: "That's a lot of hand jobs man, just saying."
Everyone just chokes on there spit.
---
Quinn looking at old pictures of his family, DeMarco looks over his shoulder.
DeMarco: "That's not your Aunt Mary, that's Hitler's grandmother."
Quinn just dies, because DeMarco is something else.
---
DeMarco running an errands for his friends with Crank, he stands there for a second thinking to himself.
DeMarco: "I'm doing dad things in the middle of a war, and I don't have children, I should have children with Brady."
Crank: "For the sake of humanity, please don't."
----
Buck and DeMarco hiding from angry Germans, DeMarco was trying to keep Buck calm and distracted.
DeMarco: "There's one thing in life I hate and that's fucking peek a boo, like who thought that was a bright idea?"
Buck put his head on DeMarcos shoulder to muffle his laughter.