Chapter Text
Part 1: Wishful Logic
It was terribly late when Alexis finally made it back to her Diplomat's quarters, happily discarding her stuffy business attire in reckless abandon. As she shuffled from the front door to the kitchen, a drawn-out trail of clothes littered the low-pile carpet. At first, she kicked off those pesky wedges, heels all but barking with a throbbing ache. Had Alexis known that morning she would pull an eleven-hour day—complete with last-minute jaunts between meeting locations—then she would have reconsidered. Alas, here she was paying the consequences and chucking her expensive shoes without remorse.
Promptly thereafter, she giddily removed her stockings, taking account of all the skin impressions made by the seam’s wavy pattern. Wiggling her reddened toes with childish delight, she wadded up her fraying nylons and then tossed them in the waste bin. The subtle tear that begun at the knee, finally unraveled its way toward her ankles. No thanks to her mindless, juvenile picking, she unwittingly drew the apt attention of Dr. Jones. The professional kook was always gung-ho to pick on her and Alexis was fiercely irked.
"Ya sure you get paid enough, kiddo?" he kept teasing.
"Ridiculous," Alexis grumbled, shrugging off her lavender blazer. “What does he take me for, a child?!” Feeling the familiar heat of embarrassment crawl across her face, she laid her coat on top of the kitchen counter. "I apparently get paid enough to keep my trap shut."
Gingerly shuffling toward the fridge, she opened it only to find meager prospects inside. A nearly expired jug of milk. A half-eaten sandwich with fuzzy blue spots. A pudding cup and a container of mixed fruit. Sure, she was paid handsomely as an ambassador for Earth, but it wasn’t like she had time to spend it at her leisure.
Sighing in defeat, she extracted the jug of milk, and hip-bumped the door closed with a sigh. "Cereal it is." No sooner had she opened the cabinets, fingers hovering above her favored bowl, the far-off chirp of a notification alert gave her pause. Was that…?
Chirp!
Sprinting across the room, Alexis unceremoniously stumbled over her own feet, hop-hop-hopping into the recliner. Decorum and food be darned, she wasn’t missing this! In bated breath, she scooped up the data pad, and diligently tapped her passcode in.
As the splash screen faded, Alexis’ gaze quickly landed upon the encrypted message blinking with urgency. Hesitation glued her in place as countless mental worries buzzed about like a brewing storm. Heart hammering, veins swelling, that ravenous need for vindication suddenly ignited a fire in her belly. Nibbling her lower lip with anxious anticipation, Alexis shakily tapped the screen watching as the report unfolded.
Curious teal-green eyes raced across the meager findings, the contents positively confirming a hushed conversation she overheard between Optimus and his crew. Alexis hadn’t meant to eavesdrop on the Autobots. Her intentions were innocent—at first—and purely customary. She visited them as time allowed, more often seeing them in the last minutes of their sojourn before embarking on the next mission.
However, something in their whispers struck Alexis dumbfounded, freezing her in place like a statue. She couldn’t discern much from the control room, merely managing to hear one specific word clearly before the groundbridge activated.
Starscream!
Team Prime knew how much this unconventional renegade’s loss had affected her, a tacit agreement amongst themselves never to discuss him openly. Least of all with her… While they weren’t necessarily hiding things, the subject matter was much too personal for Alexis to sleep on it. She just had to know what was going on.
What weren’t they saying?
After twenty years of waiting, the ambassador could wait no longer.
Against her better judgment, Alexis discreetly requisitioned this covert intelligence report, having sent a reconnaissance droid from the top of Cybertron City’s tallest tower. An anchored weight of guilt fixed itself upon her then, and even now, its heft was suffocating. This was quite possibly her most selfish endeavor to date, and for that, she felt wretched.
Despite knowing her sins, that rush of thrill brought a semblance of relief. There was finally proof of life, engraved in the bytes of data, down to the last RGB pixel. It was blurry proof, but proof no less. The object of her desires truly did exist in the flesh.
This is a dream come true, Starscream is alive!
As quickly as that joy had come, it fled away, diving into soured despair. Biting her thumbnail, Alexis espied the possibilities of much larger issues ahead and what the truth could really mean.
What if Starscream was flying about seeking revenge?
Was life hanging in the balance once more?
What if the jet forgot about their friendship?
About…her?
Alexis scoffed at the superficial concern crossing her mind. If he truly was back to eviscerate them from the face of reality, then he would pose a powerful threat. Against Humanity. Against the Autobots. Against her.
Tired of trying to discern the risks and the way they made her feel, the ambassador shut off the device. Leaning back into the soft recliner, she hugged the valuable tech to her chest, deciding whether to let go, or hold on.
Perhaps it would be best to let go of her childish attachment.
Alexis could pretend as if none of this had ever happened. No one would know but her and the probe. All the scheming and the late nights would go unnoticed. Effectively covered up by her position and the mountains of memoranda she habitually delved through. Teal-green eyes cast themselves toward the ceiling above, tears threatening to break through.
Mindlessly reaching over to the side table, Alexis clasped onto the token proof that remained of her friendship with Starscream. Allowing several inches of the old thread to slide through her fingers, the ambassador held the amulet out in front of herself. Narrowing a scrupulous gaze upon the bit of celestial rock, she recalled in detail how the jet brought it back from the Mars mission. Although her friends grew swiftly enamored with the piece of sparkly asteroid, the novelty of it wore off just as quickly for them.
Despite their frivolous reaction, Alexis realized the rock’s true potential. Clearly envisioning what it could become. Secretly, for close to a year, she took great lengths in researching and practicing gemology. Not that Alexis was an expert, but she was determined to clean, polish, and mount it with her own hands. While the project wasn’t something born of instant gratification, she was eventually able to produce this amulet.
It was her good luck charm—or so she had foolishly called it.
Leaning forward, Alexis undid the clasp and secured it behind her neck. Palming the jade gemstone, she frowned at the crack that spanned its length. Remembering with stomach-flopping agony how it had shattered upon Starscream’s sudden death. Even now it caused her to grieve, the unbidden tears now freely spilling out.
Popping out the leg of the recliner, Alexis leaned back, and opened her data pad once more. Swiping at her heavy eyes, the ambassador tried distracting herself by memorizing the reconnaissance photos of Starscream. Perhaps it was her present state of mind, but all the nuances about the fighter jet were completely off. If memory served, his last upgrade had him sporting navy paint with red accents. Now, he appeared gunmetal grey with lesser accents of mint, red, and yellow.
Did Starscream perhaps receive yet another technological advance?
Alexis yawned as she turned to her side, staying this way for some time. The overhead motion sensors had long since flickered off, leaving her to bask in the blue light of her tablet. None of these revelations made sense, and she couldn’t quite place her finger on it. Regardless of all the unknowns, the only sure thing left for her groggy mind to reconcile was the desire to see him.
I wish we could get a do-over, another chance!
To tell Starscream all the things I never got to say.
Keep him by my side and out of trouble.
But…wishing never solved anything.
Soon thereafter Alexis fell into a deep sleep, dreaming of a shattered star.