Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The news came ten months after Jess’s remission. It was only a month after Jess graduated high school early. The shock felt like an endless pour of ice water, leaving you breathless and gasping for air. It was meant to be just a regular check-up. But when the doctor came back with the blood test results, he had a serious expression on his face. That was uncommon. Dr. Parker was usually very positive and Jess knew him well since he had been the boy’s doctor since the beginning. They often had a light atmosphere in the treatment room but this time something was very different. Jess gripped the armrests of the chair tight.

“Jess, I’m afraid I have some bad news for you.” Doctor Parker began, studying Jess’s face. “Your blood tests show evidence of a relapse. Your cancer is back.”

Jess walked out of the hospital in a haze. He felt like he was in a dream and soon he’d wake up, next safe, cancer-free, and next to Rory. But he didn’t wake up. This was reality.

Luke was waiting in the parking lot, his pickup truck parked on the side. When Jess climbed in, Luke could immediately tell something was wrong with his nephew. He looked dazed, almost like someone had drugged him.

“Hey, everything go alright?”, he asked with concern etched to his face.

Jess stared blankly ahead. There was a hum in his head, making it hard to think. He didn’t even hear his uncle’s question until the older man shook his shoulder to snap him out of the trance.

“Jess, what’s wrong?” Luke tried again now that he got the boy’s attention.

Jess’s voice was emotionless and indifferent, like he was speaking of something completely mundane. “The cancer is back.”

Luke was silent for a while before erupting into a rage. “What? How? That’s impossible! Everything’s been going so well. All the tests have been great so far. I mean you graduated and you’ve been writing. You’ve been healthy. It can’t come back now. We’ve done everything right. You’ve taken your meds and eaten the meals I make for you. That’s ridiculous, it can’t-“

“Luke stop”, Jess interrupted his uncle’s rambling. “It’s back. I have to fight it again.”

Luke looked at his nephew with sad eyes. He knew the road ahead was going to be incredibly tough. Even tougher than the first time around. God how Jess didn’t deserve any of this. He had been doing so well. And now it was all crushed.

“I gotta go back tomorrow to start the treatment.”

The ride home was spent in silence. Luke didn’t even turn on the radio. They needed the silence to think. Both of them seemed to be lost in their own thoughts. Luke almost missed their exit on the highway.

As they pulled up in front of the Gilmore house, the atmosphere was dark. They could feel Lorelai’s upbeat aura radiating all the way down to the driveway and they knew they would have to crush that in just a few seconds.

Their living arrangements were somewhat different. They spent about half of their time at the Gilmore house and half in the apartment above the diner. Luke started dating Lorelai not long after Jess’s party eight months ago and Jess was just happy to spend as much time as possible with Rory. But now he wanted nothing more than to curl up in his own bed and hide from everyone.

“Hey boys. How was the doctor?” Lorelai asked from the kitchen when she heard them opening the front door.

Luke looked at Jess, his gaze reading “do you want to tell her or should I?” Jess’s eyes told him that Luke should be the one to break the news.

Lorelai came to the entryway and pecked Luke on the cheek. She noticed the sullen looks of the men. “Is something wrong?” she asked with a worried expression creeping to her face.

Luke sighed. He placed a hand on Jess’s shoulder. Lorelai’s eyes went to him.

“Doctor Parker had some bad news. Jess’s cancer is back.”

Lorelai let out a gasp, her face pulling into shock. Then, she wrapped her arms around the boy. Jess melted into her touch a bit but there was still an unnatural stiffness to him. Her hand went to the back of his neck.

“I’m so sorry hun”, she said quietly. She couldn’t believe this could happen to their Jess again. She knew she had her doubts about the boy when he first started dating Rory, but Jess had proved himself to be incredibly resilient and strong. Lorelai admired him greatly. As she broke the hug, she held Jess by his shoulders and looked him in the eyes. “We’re gonna get through this. We’ll all support you, just like last time.” Jess could only nod.

There was no other option for him. He had to be strong and brave and a fighter again. He couldn’t quit or decide that he didn’t want to be brave anymore. He had to fight it, no matter how painful it was and no matter how much he didn’t want to.

Lorelai broke the news to Rory over the phone. She was spending a few weeks with her father and her baby sister. She was devastated by the news and wanted to come back immediately to support her boyfriend, but Lorelai convinced her to stay. She had only been there for a few days and Lorelai told her they would have it covered until she came back.

The next morning, Jess walked through the doors of the oh-so-familiar hospital. Despite the hospital being a pediatric hospital and Jess being newly eighteen years old and a legal adult, he was still being treated there as he had his “own” doctor there who had treated him before and knew his case through and through.

Jess felt a tread press down on him as he settled down into his room. Lorelai and Luke were eyeing him worriedly from the side of the room. Jess sat down on the edge of his bed, clutching the set of worn-out hospital pyjamas in his hand.

Nobody knew what to say. There were no words. This wasn’t a situation they wanted to be in again. Lorelai moved to sit next to the defeated boy. She placed her hand on his back. Jess hung his head low.

Luke moved to sit in front of Jess. His hand was on the boy’s knee. The silence was loud inside the room. The machines that hadn’t yet been hooked to Jess loomed next to the bed like scary totems.

Jess kept his head down and bit his lip, trying to desperately hide the emotional turmoil he was in. Nightmare was the only word that could describe the situation.

“We love you, Jess. And we’ll always be here for you”, Lorelai whispered to him while making small circles on his back. Jess tried to mask his shaky breath into a cough but his eyes were betraying him. He felt wetness pooling in them. He wiped it off alongside the rest of his vulnerability. After he trusted himself enough to keep his emotions in check, he got up and went to change in the bathroom.

The pyjamas were light blue with some darker stripes. As Jess buttoned up the shirt, he looked at himself in the mirror. The pyjamas made him instantly look smaller and sicker. It was depressing, seeing all his effort diminishing even though he hadn’t even started treatment yet. Jess had made an effort to go to the gym and eat healthy, gaining a nice amount of muscle mass. He knew it would be a matter of weeks before it was all gone. At least he didn’t have to say goodbye to his hair, as he knew that his gene mutation would make sure his hair wouldn’t budge from his head.

Jess wasn’t yet mentally prepared for any of the discomfort that the hospital brought him. As he settled on the bed and got his first needle as his nurse hooked him into an IV, the reality of the situation started to dawn on him. He remembered all the nausea, all the pain, and all the fatigue that came with his cancer treatment the last time around. He had months and months of all that ahead of him now.

He dropped his head against the pillows and draped his free arm over his face. The emotions he had been holding in were threatening to spill. He bit his lip. He didn’t want to cry in front of the nurse, or anyone for that matter. But as she pinched his arm again, the first poke being unsuccessful in finding his vein, the tears that he had been holding in rolled down his cheeks.

Everyone in the room understood that it was more about the emotional pain than the physical. Lorelai and Luke were by his side in an instant.

Lorelai reached for Jess's hand, her grip firm but gentle, her thumb rubbing soothing circles on his skin. She didn't say anything, knowing that words weren't necessary at that moment. Her presence was her message: she was there for him, unwavering and steadfast.

Luke placed a reassuring hand on Jess's shoulder, his touch solid and grounding. He gave Jess a small, encouraging nod. The look in Luke's eyes conveyed everything Jess needed to know—strength, support, and a promise that he wouldn't face this alone.

Jess tried to muster a brave smile, but the weight of it all was too much. He squeezed Lorelai's hand, finding some comfort in her presence. The memories of the previous treatments and the uncertainty of the future were overwhelming. He felt like he was drowning in a sea of emotions, the fear and frustration tugging at him from all sides.

The nurse, understanding the emotional gravity of the moment, finally found a vein and successfully inserted the IV. "I'm sorry about that," she said gently, trying to reassure him. "You're doing great. Just hang in there."

Jess nodded, his voice caught in his throat.

Dr. Parker entered the room with a clipboard in hand, his face a mix of professional concern and compassion. He approached the bed where Jess lay, flanked by Lorelai and Luke. The doctor took a moment to observe the emotional weight hanging in the air before speaking.

"Jess, Lorelai, Luke," Dr. Parker began, his voice calm yet firm, "I wanted to discuss the treatment plan moving forward. I won't sugarcoat this—relapses are often harder to treat than the initial diagnosis. This means we need to be aggressive and thorough."

Lorelai tightened her grip on Jess's hand, and Luke's hand remained steady on Jess's shoulder. Jess tried to steady his breathing, preparing himself for the details.

"We're going to start with chemotherapy to see how your body responds," Dr. Parker continued. "If the chemo is effective, we’ll proceed accordingly. However, there is a possibility that you will need a bone marrow transplant. This is a more intensive treatment, but it can be crucial in cases like yours."

Jess nodded, his face pale but determined. "How soon will we know if the chemo is working?"

Dr. Parker offered a reassuring nod. "We'll monitor your progress closely. After the first few rounds, we'll have a better idea of how your body is responding. The goal is to get you into remission and then evaluate the need for a transplant."

The room fell silent for a moment as the gravity of the situation sank in. Lorelai's eyes shimmered with unshed tears, but she kept her composure for Jess's sake. Luke's jaw was set in a hard line, his concern palpable.

"I know this is a lot to take in," Dr. Parker said gently. "But you're not alone in this. We have a strong team, and we'll be with you every step of the way."

Jess swallowed hard, the reality of his situation weighing heavily on him. “Okay.”

Dr. Parker gave a small, encouraging smile. "We'll get through this together, Jess. One step at a time." He glanced at Lorelai and Luke. "If you have any questions or concerns, please don’t hesitate to reach out."

Lorelai nodded, her voice steady despite the tremor in her hands. "We will. Thank you, Dr. Parker."

A nurse Jess had never seen before entered the room with a soft knock, her eyes immediately catching the dried tear tracks on Jess's cheeks. She smiled warmly at him, trying to ease the tension she sensed in the air. She was young and her name tag read Emily. Jess grimaced as an image of Rory’s grandmother came to his mind, but he was willing to give the nurse a shot before he’d decide that he despised her just because of her name.

"Hey there, Jess," she greeted gently, approaching his bedside with a tray of supplies. "I'm just here to draw some blood for your tests. I promise to be as gentle as I can."

Jess managed a faint nod, his eyes flickering briefly to Lorelai and Luke who sat nearby, their expressions a mixture of concern and support.

The nurse pulled a chair close and set down her tray, arranging the supplies methodically. "You've been through this before, right?" she asked softly, her voice carrying reassurance.

Jess nodded again, his gaze fixed on the sterile bandage Emily was preparing. He extended his arm reluctantly, steeling himself for the prick of the needle.

Lorelai reached out, resting a hand on Jess's shoulder. "You're doing great, kiddo," she murmured, her voice thick with emotion.

Emily swabbed Jess's skin with an alcohol pad, her movements gentle and precise. "Deep breaths, Jess," she encouraged, as she prepared to insert the needle. The needle pierced Jess's skin, causing him to flinch involuntarily. He squeezed his eyes shut, gripping Lorelai's hand tightly as the nurse collected the necessary vials of blood.

"All done," Emily announced softly, withdrawing the needle and applying pressure to the site with a cotton ball. She taped a bandage over the puncture and smiled warmly at Jess. "You did great, Jess. Rest up now, okay?"

Jess nodded weakly, relieved that it was over. He felt a wave of gratitude towards the nurse for her kindness. "Thanks," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper.

Emily packed up her supplies and left the room quietly, leaving Jess, Lorelai, and Luke in a moment of quiet relief. Jess sank back against the pillows, closing his eyes as he tried to push away the lingering discomfort.

To Jess’s distress, he was told that he needed to get a lumbar puncture, or a spinal tap as it was sometimes called. He needed it to determine how far his cancer had progressed and it was his first time getting it done. All he knew about it was that it hurt like hell. Well, getting a long needle into his spine surely didn’t sound delightful.

He was instructed to lie on his side, curl into a fetal position, and remain as still as possible. Doctor Parker came to perform the procedure. He lifted Jess’s shirt up and first gave Jess a smaller needle, local anesthesia to help with the pain a bit. It didn’t help. As the larger needle was inserted inside his vertebrate, Jess had to squeeze Luke’s hand as hard as he could to remain conscious. His face was etched in pain. He would have forgotten to breathe if Lorelai wasn’t there to remind him.

"It'll be over soon, Jess," Luke murmured, his voice steady and reassuring.

Jess nodded weakly, his heart racing with apprehension.

Lorelai placed a hand on Jess's forehead, brushing his hair gently. "You're doing amazing, sweetheart," she murmured, her voice soothing.

Jess felt the needle retrieve from his back and he couldn’t have been more relieved. “Good job Jess. You did well”, Doctor Parker praised him as he pressed a band aid to the incision spot.

“The results will be in tomorrow. You just rest now Jess”, the doctor said with a reassuring pat on Jess’s shoulder. He gave a nod to Luke and Lorelai and left the room.

Jess was exhausted after the testing and he curled up on his side to take a nap. It didn’t take long for his breathing to even out into a rhythmic hum, signaling that he had fallen asleep.

Lorelai looked at Luke, trying to read his emotions off his face. “He’s a strong kid”, she said quietly as if trying to convince herself that everything would be fine.

“You heard what the doctor said. Relapses are harder to treat”, Luke said with a sullen expression. “He already suffered so much last time.”

“I know he did,” Lorelai replied softly, her gaze fixed on Jess as he slept. “But he’s been through worse before. He’s resilient, Luke. And this time, we caught it early.”

Luke nodded, his brow furrowed with concern. “I just hate seeing him go through all of this again. He’s barely had a chance to enjoy being a teenager.”

“I hate it too,” Lorelai admitted, her voice catching slightly. “But Jess is tough. And he’s not alone in this. We’re all here for him.”

They sat in silence for a moment, watching over Jess as he slept peacefully, unaware of the weight of their worries. The room was quiet except for the soft beeping of the monitor, a constant reminder of Jess’s presence and the ongoing battle he faced.

“He’s got Rory,” Lorelai continued, her tone more hopeful now. “And he’s got us. That’s gotta count for something.”

Luke nodded again, a flicker of determination in his eyes. “Yeah. We’ll get through this, just like we did before. Jess is gonna beat this.”

Lorelai reached out, placing a comforting hand on Luke’s shoulder. “He will,” she affirmed. “We’ll make sure of it.”

Jess stirred in the hospital bed, his eyes blinking open slowly as he adjusted to the sterile white surroundings. It had been a rough day. Hospitals were never fun but to be told that he needed to get treated for cancer again, which he had already beaten once. Somehow it felt even worse than the first time around. Now he knew what to expect, how hard it would all be.

As Jess blinked away the haze of sleep, he became aware of Luke sitting in a chair by the window, flipping through an old magazine, and Lorelai dozing off in the other chair beside him. He appreciated them being there, but he also felt a bit awkward. He felt like a little kid, weak and vulnerable and unable to stay in a big scary hospital by himself.

Just then, his phone buzzed softly on the bedside table. Jess reached for it, seeing Rory's name on the screen. A small smile tugged at his lips as he answered the call.

"Hey," Jess greeted softly, his voice still raspy from sleep.

"Hey, Jess," Rory's voice came through, filled with warmth and concern. "How are you feeling?"

"Better now," Jess replied honestly. "I just woke up from a nap. Luke and Lorelai are here."

"Oh, good," Rory said softly. "I wish I could be there with you right now."

"It's okay," Jess reassured her, his heart squeezing with longing to see her. "I know you're visiting your dad. How's he doing?"

"He's okay," Rory replied. "He's been asking about you. I told him you're strong and you'll get through this."

Jess closed his eyes briefly, feeling a rush of emotion at Rory's words. "Thanks, Rory. I miss you."

"I miss you too, Jess," Rory said softly. "But I'll be back soon, I promise. In the meantime, if you need anything, just let Luke and Lorelai know, okay?"

"I will," Jess promised.
“Just try to be strong, okay? I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“I’ll try my hardest. Although I’m not super thrilled to be eating hospital food until further notice”, Jess joked.

“Well, I’m sure mom and Luke could bring you something you’d wanna eat. I’m surprised they’re not fussing over you every waking moment.”

“You should’ve seen them before. I think they wore out the most of it.”

“They mean well, you know. Everyone is worried about you.”

“I know. It just sucks.”

“It does. But if anyone can beat this, it’s you. And you’ve already done it once. That’s proof you can do it again.”

“I guess so. Thanks, Rory.”

"Always," Rory replied, her voice filled with love. "I'll talk to you soon, okay? Take care of yourself. Oh and tell mom and Luke I said hi."

"I will," Jess said, reluctant to end the call but grateful for the brief connection they had. "Love you, Rory."

"I love you too, Jess," Rory said softly before ending the call.

Jess set the phone down gently, a bittersweet smile on his face. He glanced over at Luke and Lorelai, who were now both awake and watching him with concern.

"Rory says hi," Jess said, his voice catching slightly. "She sends her love."

Luke nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. "She's a good one, that girl."

"Yeah," Jess agreed softly, his thoughts drifting back to Rory and the strength she gave him, even from afar.

Luke dug into Jess’s bag to find his books and set them on the bedside table. Jess had wanted to fill the entire bag with just books but Luke had promised to bring him more once he finished the ones he had. So alongside seven books, Jess had his toiletries and some comfy clothes in the bag.

Jess scouted the books he had taken with him and settled with some Hemingway. He lifted the head of his bed and Luke helped to prop a pillow behind him. He pulled his knees up and leaned the book against them. He snapped the book spine and began reading.

Lorelai stood up to stretch her legs and looked out the window. It was a sunny summer day and Lorelai could think of a thousand other places she wanted to spend the nice day in instead of the hospital. But she was there to support Jess and she wasn’t going to complain when she could leave any moment she wanted. Jess didn’t have that luxury.

“Hey, I could go grab us some food. You fancy anything?” she asked, eyeing both Luke and Jess. The latter was too absorbed in his book already to give it much thought and he just said to get whatever. Luke said the same thing.

“Wow, you two are really helpful with this. You know how well I make decisions”, she said with a playful smile.

“I trust you to make the correct one”, Luke said and kissed Lorelai bye.

Lorelai chuckled at Luke's response, feeling a twinge of affection for his straightforwardness. "Alright, I'll be back soon. Don't get into too much trouble without me," she teased, waving as she headed out of the hospital room.

Luke settled back into his chair, his gaze shifting between Jess and the book in his hands. Jess was immersed in Hemingway's prose, his brow furrowed slightly in concentration as he turned the pages. Luke couldn't help but feel a surge of pride mixed with worry. Jess had always been resilient but seeing him battle leukemia again reminded Luke of just how strong his nephew truly was.

"You okay, Jess?" Luke asked softly, breaking the silence as Jess turned another page.

"Yeah," Jess replied without looking up, his voice calm but slightly distant. "Just trying to focus on something else for a while."

Luke nodded, understanding the need for distraction. As Luke watched over Jess, he couldn't shake the feeling of helplessness that sometimes washed over him in moments like these. He wanted to do more, to take away Jess's pain and uncertainty, but all he could offer was his presence and support.

A few minutes later, the door opened again, and Lorelai walked in carrying a bag of takeout. "Food's here!" she announced cheerfully, setting the bag down on the bedside table.

Jess looked up from his book, a faint smile gracing his lips. "Thanks, Lorelai."

Lorelai grinned back at him, pulling out containers of sandwiches and fries. "Got your favorite, Jess."

Luke stood up and joined them by the bedside, grateful for the distraction of food and the familiar banter that always seemed to accompany Lorelai wherever she went. They ate together quietly, sharing occasional glances and small smiles, finding comfort in each other's company amidst the sterile hospital environment.

After they finished eating, Lorelai helped tidy up the remnants of their meal. "I should probably head home soon," she said, glancing at the clock. "You boys gonna be alright?"

They had decided beforehand that Luke would stay with Jess at least for the first night. Jess would be fine spending the nights alone, but Luke didn’t want to abandon his nephew there so quickly.

Jess nodded, setting his empty plate aside. "Yeah, we'll be fine.”

Lorelai ruffled Jess’s hair with a soft smile. “Good. You just focus on getting better.”

Jess nodded again, his gaze meeting hers with gratitude. "I will."

Lorelai straightened up and turned to Luke, reaching out to squeeze his hand briefly. "Take care of him, Luke."

Luke nodded solemnly, his gaze never leaving Jess. "Always."

With a final smile, Lorelai headed for the door, pausing to glance back at them one last time before disappearing into the hallway. Luke returned to his chair by Jess's bed, settling in for the night ahead. As Jess picked up his book again, Luke felt a renewed sense of determination to be there for his nephew, no matter what challenges lay ahead.

As Jess drifted into a restless sleep, Luke remained vigilant in the chair beside his bed, his presence a steady anchor in the quiet hospital room. The monitors beeped softly in the background, their rhythms blending with the hushed hum of the air conditioning.

At first, Jess's sleep seemed peaceful, his breathing even and steady. But as the minutes ticked by, his brow furrowed and he began to stir, murmuring unintelligible words under his breath. Luke leaned forward slightly, his concern deepening as he listened.

"Jess," Luke called softly, unsure if his nephew could hear him. "You okay, kid?"

Jess shifted uneasily, his hands fidgeting with the blanket. "No... don't..."

Luke frowned, feeling a pang of helplessness. He had seen Jess struggle with nightmares before, remnants of past traumas that still haunted him. He wished he could do more than just watch, but all he could offer was his presence and reassurance.

"Jess," Luke said again, his voice gentle but firm. "It's okay. You're safe here."

Slowly, Jess's movements stilled, and he seemed to relax slightly. The tension in his face eased, though he continued to mumble incoherently. Luke reached out, placing a reassuring hand on Jess's arm, hoping to offer some comfort.

"You're strong, Jess," Luke whispered, his voice filled with conviction. "You can get through this."

Jess's breathing gradually deepened, and the lines of worry on his face softened. The room fell into a peaceful silence once more, broken only by the quiet sounds of Jess's sleep.

Luke settled back into his chair, his gaze never leaving Jess. He remained vigilant throughout the night, keeping a silent vigil over his nephew as he slept, ready to offer support whenever Jess needed it, even in the depths of his dreams.

The morning light filtered through the window, casting a soft glow across the hospital room where Jess lay. Luke had spent the night in the chair beside his nephew's bed, intermittently nodding off in short bursts of sleep. He woke up with a start as the nurses entered the room, their gentle voices and efficient movements signaling the start of a new day.

"Good morning, Mr. Danes," one of the nurses greeted Luke with a warm smile. "We're going to start Jess's chemotherapy now. It will run continuously through his IV for the next five days."

Luke nodded silently, his throat tight with worry. He watched as the nurses adjusted Jess's IV drip, connecting it to the bag of chemotherapy drugs that hung above the bed. Jess stirred slightly at the movement, blinking blearily as he woke up.

"Morning," Jess muttered, his voice hoarse from sleep.

"Morning, Jess," Luke replied softly, reaching out to squeeze his nephew's hand reassuringly. "They're starting the treatment now. You ready?"

Jess nodded, his expression determined despite the weariness in his eyes. "Yeah, let's get this over with."

The nurses worked efficiently, checking Jess's vitals and ensuring everything was set up correctly. Luke stood by Jess's side throughout, offering quiet words of encouragement and support. He felt a swell of pride mixed with apprehension as he watched Jess steel himself for the challenging days ahead.

Once everything was in place, the chemotherapy began to flow through the IV tubing, a steady drip that would continue day and night for the next five days. Jess settled back against the pillows, his gaze fixed on the bag of drugs above him, his thoughts known only to himself.

Luke remained by Jess's side, his presence a silent vow to support his nephew through every moment of this difficult journey. As the chemotherapy infused into Jess's body, Luke found himself hoping and praying silently for strength, for Jess to endure and emerge stronger on the other side.

The room settled into a quiet rhythm, the steady beep of monitors and the soft hum of the IV pump filling the space. Luke glanced out the window, watching the world outside continue on its usual course, while inside this hospital room, their own world revolved around Jess's fight against leukemia.

"Just remember that we’ll always be here for you," Luke said quietly, his voice filled with unwavering determination. "You're not alone in this."

Jess nodded faintly, his eyes closing as exhaustion washed over him. He knew the road ahead would be tough, but with Luke's steadfast support and the strength he drew from within, he was ready to face it head-on.

“Have you told Liz?” Jess asked out of the blue.

The questioned made Luke squirm. The topic of Jess’s mother was quite a sensitive one after what happened last Christmas. Luke had then told Liz to stop coming into Jess’s life if she couldn’t commit to it. That was also the last time he had talked to her. He hadn’t heard anything from her since and to his knowledge, neither had Jess. It was for the better. Liz had a talent of messing up any stability Jess had managed to build up and Luke was sick of it.

“No, I… I haven’t talked to her since she last came by”, he answered a bit uneasily.

Jess nodded but Luke could see that he was disappointed.

“Look, I know we never really talked about it. I told her to stay away. I didn’t want her to hurt you any further. I’m sorry”, Luke confessed. He was avoiding eye contact with the boy but he knew Jess was doing the same thing. Like uncle like nephew.

Jess bit his lip. “Oh”, was the only thing he could say.

Luke sighed heavily, the weight of his confession settling heavily between them. He knew Jess deserved honesty, even when it was painful. He looked up, meeting Jess's gaze with a mix of regret and determination.

"I didn't want her to mess things up for you again, Jess," Luke continued, his voice earnest. "You've been through so much, and I just... I wanted to protect you."

Jess nodded slowly, his expression unreadable. "I get it.”

Luke nodded, relieved that Jess seemed to understand his intentions, even if the outcome was difficult to accept. "Yeah. But if you want to talk to her now, I won't stand in your way."

Jess's brow furrowed in thought. He knew reaching out to Liz could be risky, but a part of him longed for closure, for some semblance of understanding between them. He had grown used to her absence, but there was still a lingering ache, a desire to confront the tumultuous relationship they had always shared.

"I think I do," Jess said finally, his voice quiet but resolute. "I need to hear it from her."

Luke nodded again, his heart heavy with concern but also with admiration for Jess's courage. "Okay. I'll call her."

Jess nodded in acknowledgment, his gaze dropping to his hands where they lay on the hospital blanket. "Thanks.”

With a deep breath, Luke pulled out his phone and dialled Liz's number, his thoughts swirling with a mix of apprehension and determination. He knew this conversation could change everything, for better or for worse, but for Jess's sake, he had to try.

After a few rings, Liz answered, her voice cautious. "Luke?"

"Yeah, it's me," Luke replied, his tone serious. "We need to talk."

Meanwhile, Jess watched Luke anxiously, his heart racing with a mix of anticipation and fear. He knew this conversation could bring closure or reopen old wounds, but either way, he was ready to face it.

Jess held the phone Luke handed to him with a mix of trepidation and a faint glimmer of hope. He took a deep breath and pressed it to his ear, hearing the familiar voice of his mother on the other end, though it felt strangely distant and detached.

"Liz?" Jess started tentatively, his voice betraying a hint of vulnerability.

"Jess," Liz's voice replied curtly.

Jess hesitated for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts. He wanted his mother to continue the conversation, to be interested about his life. They hadn’t talked in months, surely she would be interested how he’s doing.

"What is it, Jess?" Liz said a bit impatiently.

"I... I relapsed," Jess blurted out, the words heavy with the weight of his admission. He hated saying it out loud. It was like he had failed, let his guard down and cancer had crept it’s way back in.

Liz's response was cold and dismissive. "Oh. Well, I'm sorry to hear that." Her tone was missing empathy, like she couldn’t care less that her son was battling a cruel illness again.

Jess felt a pang of hurt and frustration, but he pressed on, his voice shaking slightly. "I’m sorry for how things went last time”, he spoke out, considering his next words. “I was hoping you could come see me.”

Luke’s heart ached. Jess shouldn’t be the one saying he’s sorry. And he definitely shouldn’t have to beg his mother to come see him.

There was a long silence on the line before Liz finally spoke again, her voice tinged with annoyance. "Jess, I'm really busy right now. I can't just drop everything."

Jess's heart sank. He knew not to hope too much when it came to Liz. It still hurt when his own mother was being so indifferent about him. It was a wound that never quite healed, no matter how much time passed. "I know, I just… was hoping you could come eventually.”

Liz sighed audibly. "Luke told me not to interfere. He made it clear I wasn't welcome."

Luke watched Jess closely, his heart breaking for his nephew. He could hear Liz's excuses and deflections, knowing deep down that she wouldn't have been there even if he hadn't discouraged her.

"I didn't say that," Luke interjected firmly, unable to stay silent any longer. "Jess wanted to talk to you. He needed this."

Liz's response was sharp. "Well, maybe if you hadn't pushed me away..."

Jess's hand tightened around the phone, his emotions in turmoil. He felt abandoned once again, the familiar ache of disappointment settling heavily in his chest.

"Never mind," Jess said quietly, his voice tinged with resignation. "I shouldn't have called."

With a heavy heart, Jess handed the phone back to Luke, his eyes brimming with unshed tears. Luke took it, his jaw clenched with frustration and sadness. He knew Liz's words had wounded Jess deeply, and he wished he could shield his nephew from the pain.

"I'm sorry, Jess," Luke said softly, his voice thick with emotion. "I thought..."

Jess shook his head, his gaze distant as he turned away. "It's okay, Luke. I should have known better."

Luke reached out, resting a hand on Jess's shoulder in silent solidarity. Together, they sat in the quiet hospital room, the weight of Liz's absence lingering between them. Despite everything, Luke vowed silently to continue supporting Jess, to be the constant presence in his life that Liz had failed to be.

After the call with Liz, the atmosphere in the hospital room grew heavy with unspoken tension and disappointment. Jess sat on the bed, his shoulders slumped, staring blankly at the wall. Luke stood nearby, feeling utterly helpless in the face of Jess's pain.

Luke wanted to reach out, to offer comfort or words of reassurance, but he knew there was little he could say to ease the sting of Liz's indifference. He had seen Jess hurt before, but this felt different—more profound and raw.

Silence hung between them, broken only by the soft hum of the medical equipment and the distant murmur of voices in the hallway. Luke struggled to find the right words, his own emotions swirling with frustration and sadness for Jess.

Finally, he moved closer to Jess and sat down beside him on the edge of the bed. He placed a hand on Jess's back, offering a gentle squeeze. "Jess..."

Jess glanced at Luke, his eyes reflecting a mixture of pain and resignation. "I thought... maybe she'd care this time."

Luke sighed heavily, his heart aching for his nephew. "I know, kid. I wish she did."

"I just... I don't understand," Jess murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "Why can't she just be there for me, like... like a mom should?"

Luke's throat tightened with emotion. He didn't have the answers Jess sought, and it tore at him to see his nephew grappling with these feelings of abandonment. "I wish I knew, Jess. Some people... they just don't know how to be what you need them to be."

Jess nodded silently, his gaze dropping to his hands in his lap. Luke wished he could take away Jess's pain, to shield him from the disappointments life had dealt him.

"Hey," Luke said softly, trying to find some semblance of hope in the midst of their sorrow. "You've got me. And Lorelai. And Rory. We're here for you, Jess. Always."

Jess looked up at Luke, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. "I know, Uncle Luke. And I'm grateful for that."

Luke gave Jess a small, understanding smile. "Let's focus on getting through this, okay? One step at a time."

Jess nodded slowly, a flicker of determination in his eyes. "Yeah. Okay."

They sat together in the quiet of the hospital room, drawing strength from each other's presence. Despite the ache of Liz's absence, Luke vowed silently to continue being the stable, supportive presence Jess deserved—a promise that he hoped would help heal the wounds left by his mother's neglect.

Chapter Text

Jess was in his thoughts a lot that afternoon. He just sat on his bed, staring at the wall. Nurses would come and go, checking on him and whatever but Jess would just remain silent, deep in his thoughts.

Luke had left a bit earlier with promises to visit him soon again. Jess had only nodded, and Luke had never felt more guilty about leaving his nephew. But he had responsibilities at the diner and he knew Jess would be safe at the hospital.

This was all so much to take in for Jess. He had been doing well. For the first time ever, he had been excited for his future. He had decided not to go to college but instead try to pursue his dream of writing. He had been working on his first script and hoping that he could get a publishing house interested in it enough to print it. He had high dreams about becoming a successful author and building a fancy house on the outskirts of Stars Hollow where he could write and live with Rory. Though Rory had big dreams of her own, Jess was convinced that she would eventually settle down with him and the two of them could live a slow life there in peace. He was imagining a few kids and maybe a dog running around in the yard, though he was more of a cat person.

But now everything was ruined again. He was back in the damn hospital, just hoping that he could make it out alive again. Life was so unfair, and Jess couldn’t understand what he had done so wrong to deserve all of this. It wasn’t just the cancer but the life he had before coming to Stars Hollow as well. But he didn’t want to open that can of worms yet.

And boy was he so stupid for calling Liz. That was probably his dumbest decision since he stole 500 baseballs from the school. If he hadn’t called, he could’ve told himself that Liz really cared but that she was just busy and distracted. He could’ve been blissfully unaware. But now he knew that Liz couldn’t give a flying fuck about him. And as much as he didn’t want to admit it, it hurt. It hurt a lot. She was the one person who was meant to love and support him no matter what. She had miserably failed at her job.

Later that evening, Jess heard a knock on his door. He didn’t react but soon he saw a familiar nurse peek her head in. It was Julie. She had been Jess’s nurse when he was admitted a year ago. Despite the rough day, Jess felt a small relief seeing her. She had always been so gentle and caring with him. Almost like a mother would, should be.

“Jess”, she said softly. She could read from his expression how many emotions were going around in his head. Julie slowly approached Jess’s bed.

Jess managed a small smile. “Hi, Julie.”

“I thought I told you I didn’t want to see you here anymore. Not like this”, she said with a gentle voice.

“Yeah, well what can I say, I missed you too much”, Jess joked half-heartedly.

Julie pulled him into a gentle hug, her hand going behind his neck. “I’m so sorry Jess. I truly wished you would be done here”, she whispered into his ear.

Jess closed his eyes. He nodded at her words. “Me too.”

Julie pulled back slightly, keeping her hands on Jess's shoulders. She looked into his eyes with genuine concern. "How are you holding up, really?" she asked, her voice tender but probing.

Jess shrugged, his facade of bravery faltering. "It's been a rough day."

“I can only imagine. If you wanna talk about it, I’m always here for you.”

Jess nodded again. “Thanks.”

Julie studied her patient’s face for a moment, her eyes searching for any hints that he might open up to her. Jess's face was a mask of composure, but Julie could see the turmoil beneath the surface.

“Have you still been going to that cancer support group?” she asked gently, hoping to ease him into a conversation. Julie had been the one to introduce Jess to the group and he would be forever grateful for her for that.

Jess shifted slightly, his fingers absently tracing the edge of the blanket. “I used to. I went every week for months, but I haven’t been going for a while now. Not since Sadie… you know.” His voice trailed off, and he avoided eye contact, his gaze fixed on the floor.

Julie’s expression softened, her eyes reflecting empathy and understanding. She reached out and placed a comforting hand on his arm. “Oh yes, I heard about Sadie. She was my patient as well, such a sweet girl. I’m sorry for your loss, Jess. It must be tough losing a friend.”

Jess nodded, his throat tightening with emotion. He swallowed hard, trying to keep his composure. “Yeah, it was. She was one of the few people who really got what I was going through.”

Julie squeezed his arm gently, her voice soothing. “I know. It’s important to have those connections, especially when you’re going through something as challenging as this. Maybe it would help to go back to the group, even if just to talk about Sadie.”

Jess looked up at Julie. “Maybe. It just reminds me of her so much.”

Julie nodded understandingly, her eyes reflecting the depth of her empathy. She took a seat beside Jess's bed, her movements calm and deliberate. "I understand. It’s hard when a place holds so many memories, especially when those memories are painful."

Jess sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly. "Yeah. Every time I think about going back, I remember the last time we were all there together. It’s like... if I go back, I have to face the fact that she’s really gone."

"That’s completely normal, Jess. Grieving is a process, and it’s different for everyone. It’s okay to take your time. And remember, the group is there to support you, too. They’ve been through similar losses. It might help to share those feelings with people who understand."

Jess squeezed her hand, drawing comfort from her presence. "Maybe you’re right. It’s just... it feels like so much right now."

"I know it does," Julie said softly. "But you don’t have to go through it alone. Lean on the people who care about you. Like Luke, Rory, and even me. We all want to see you get through this."

Jess managed a small smile. "Thanks, Julie. You’re always so good at this."

Julie chuckled lightly, her eyes sparkling with kindness. "Well, I’ve had some practice. And I genuinely care about you, Jess. You’re a strong person, even if you don’t always feel that way."

Jess's smile grew a bit wider, the weight on his chest lifting slightly. "I guess I have to keep trying then."

Julie patted his hand gently before standing up. "That’s the spirit. Now, why don’t you try to get some rest? I’ll be here if you need anything."

Jess nodded, feeling a bit more at ease. "Okay. Goodnight, Julie."

"Goodnight, Jess," she replied, her voice tender. She gave him one last reassuring smile before slipping out of the room.

Jess watched her go, the room feeling a little less heavy in her absence. He settled back against his pillows, the events of the day swirling in his mind. He closed his eyes, taking comfort in the knowledge that he wasn’t alone. As sleep began to claim him, he held onto the hope that tomorrow would be a little brighter.

Jess groggily opened his eyes to the sensation of someone gently shaking his shoulder. The hospital room was dimly lit by the early morning light filtering through the blinds, casting soft shadows on the walls.

“Good morning, Jess,” a nurse said softly, her voice kind but firm. “Time to wake up.”

Jess blinked a few times, his vision clearing as he focused on the nurse's face. It wasn’t Julie, but Jess’s new nurse he met yesterday, Emily.

"Morning," Jess mumbled, his voice still heavy with sleep. He hadn’t slept well. It took some time to adjust to the beeping of the monitors and the tugging of the IV line again. He was also used to a perfect silence that settled over Stars Hollow as soon as the clock hit ten. The hospital was never quiet and he kept stirring at the sounds from the hallway.

"Sorry to wake you," Emily said, her tone apologetic. "But we need to check your vitals and start your morning medication."

Jess nodded, rubbing his eyes and trying to shake off the remnants of sleep. "Yeah, okay."

Emily worked on Jess, her hands gentle as she adjusted the IV line and checked his pulse. Jess watched her, his thoughts still a bit foggy. He could hear the distant hum of activity in the hallway, a reminder that life in the hospital moved at its own relentless pace.

"How are you feeling today?" Emily asked, her eyes meeting his as she took his temperature.

Jess shrugged slightly. "I've been better." Jess’s discomfort was more emotional than physical for now. The side effects of chemo hadn’t hit him yet but the emotional weight of his diagnosis and everything that came with it was almost suffocating.

Emily offered him a sympathetic smile. "I understand. We’re going to take good care of you, Jess. Is there anything you need right now? Some water, maybe?"

Jess considered for a moment. "Water would be nice. Thanks."

"I’ll get that for you," Emily said, patting his hand lightly before stepping out of the room.

Jess sighed and leaned back against his pillows, the reality of his situation settling back over him. This was his life now. Hospital, procedures, pain, needles. But he tried to think of the good stuff too. Rory, Luke, Lorelai, his doctors and nurses. He had endless support from all of them and he just hoped it would be enough to save him from the disease and himself.

A few minutes later, Emily returned with a cup of water, handing it to Jess with a reassuring smile. "Here you go. Drink up. I’ll just check on the flow of the chemo.”

"Thanks," Jess said, taking a sip of the cool water. It felt good against his dry throat.

Emily busied herself with preparing his medication, her movements precise and efficient. "I’ll change your chemo bag soon, Jess. Just relax and let us know if you need anything." The bag was hanging on the IV stand with a black cover on it. Jess knew from last time that chemo had to be shielded from sunlight. He thought it was ironic, as it was essentially poison that was killing his cells and making him so weak but the drug itself couldn’t even survive sunlight.

Jess nodded, feeling a mixture of apprehension and resignation. "Okay."

As Emily finished her tasks and left the room, Jess lay back, staring at the ceiling. Despite the challenges, he found a small measure of comfort in the routine and the knowledge that he had people who cared about him, even in this sterile, clinical environment.

Jess lay back against the pillows. It was only his third day and he was already getting bored. He didn’t feel like reading because his eyes felt tired. He couldn’t really leave the room on his own and he didn’t really want to either. A small TV was mounted on the wall but nothing good was on it. Jess dug through his bag to find a notebook and a pen. He had used the notebook to write down ideas for his novel but in between he had written his thoughts, kind of like a diary.

Jess sat down on the bed and crossed his legs. He set the notebook on his thigh and began writing.

Third day in the hospital. I’ve got chemo flowing into me nonstop. It’s not too bad yet but I know it will be in a few more days. I miss Rory. She called last night but we didn’t get to talk much. I wish she was here. I feel like a failure. I let cancer in again. It’s not only ruining my life, but Luke’s, Lorelai’s, and Rory’s too. I hate how worried they are about me. It makes me feel bad. I don’t need pity. I know the whole town probably knows that I relapsed by now. They probably think I deserve it. I think so too. I’ve tried to be a good person but I don’t feel like I am. I feel different. No matter how much I try, I can never be kind and liked like Rory. I can never socialize with anyone and everyone like Lorelai. I can never comfort people like Luke. I don’t know how to talk to people. I don’t know how to be myself around them. I feel like no one knows the real me I am inside of my head. Well, maybe Rory does, at least she knows the closest version of the real me. It sucks and it’s lonely, but I also feel like it protects me. They can’t hurt me if they don’t even know the real me. Cancer isn’t a part of it. Most people just seem to pay attention to that and nothing else. It’s a gift and a curse. People will only ask me about my cancer, so it means I don’t have to talk about anything else besides that. I don’t have to tell them I’m not going to college and they don’t ask what my career path will be like. I prefer not telling people my shit. But I don’t like being seen as just my illness.

Jess wrote whatever came to his mind, not really caring if it made sense. It was just his way of venting and relieving the storm inside his head. It really helped him to clear his head and get the thoughts out from bothering him.

He closed the notebook and slid it under his pillow. He felt exhausted, the unwell-slept night pressing down on him. Just as he was beginning to drift into an uneasy doze, the door to his room creaked open again. Jess opened his eyes, half expecting to see Emily or another nurse.

Instead, it was Luke, his face lined with worry but breaking into a relieved smile when he saw Jess awake. "Hey, kid," he said softly, moving to sit beside the bed.

"Hey, Luke," Jess replied, his voice barely above a whisper.

Luke reached out and squeezed Jess's hand. "How you holding up?"

Jess managed a weak smile. "Not too bad yet.”

Luke nodded, his eyes filled with empathy and determination. "That’s my boy.” They fell into silence. Luke was studying his nephew’s appearance. He looked tired, but there were no other hints that he was currently getting chemo pumped into him. Jess’s pyjama shirt sleeves were rolled up his forearm, exposing the IV needle piercing his skin in the crook of his arm. The blanket was pulled to the side and Jess laid leaning against the pillows, his eyes wandering around the room and occasionally going to Luke.

“You feeling any pain yet?” Luke asked.

“Not really. The chemo side effects take a few days to kick in.”

Luke nodded, his eyes still locked on Jess with a mix of concern and reassurance. "Well, let's hope it stays manageable. But if you start feeling worse, you let the nurses know right away, okay?"

Jess gave a small nod, trying to muster a brave face. "Yeah, I will.”

Luke squeezed his hand again, then settled back into the chair beside the bed. "I brought you some of your favorite books," he said, and pulled a stack out from a bag he was holding. "Figured you might want something to distract you."

Jess's eyes flicked to the books, and despite the discomfort gnawing at him, a genuine smile tugged at his lips. "Thanks.”

The room fell into a comfortable silence, with Luke occasionally glancing at his nephew and Jess trying to lose himself in the pages of his book. His arm itched from where the needle pierced his skin but he tried his best to ignore it. He also tried to ignore how Luke was bouncing his leg anxiously.

After a while, the door opened again, and Emily stepped in with a gentle smile. "How are we doing in here?" she asked, her eyes darting between Jess and Luke.

"Managing," Luke replied, his voice a bit weary but filled with determination. "Just trying to keep his spirits up."

Emily nodded, her professional demeanor tinged with genuine compassion. "That's good. Jess, remember to let us know if you need anything. We’re here to help."

Jess nodded, his voice soft. "I will. Thanks, Emily."

As Emily left, Luke turned back to Jess, a thoughtful expression on his face. "You know, Rory’s been begging Lorelai to cut her trip short so that she could come see you sooner. She’s worried about how you’re holding up.”

Jess felt a pang of longing at the mention of Rory. "Yeah, I figured. I miss her."

Luke smiled sympathetically. "She misses you too, kid. But she’s strong, just like you. And she’s gonna be here cheering you on."

Jess nodded, taking a deep breath. "Yeah. I know."

The rest of the day passed in a blur of routine checks, medication adjustments, and quiet moments. Jess drifted in and out of sleep, the chemo sapping his energy. Luke stayed by his side, reading quietly or simply sitting in companionable silence.

As evening approached, Luke glanced at the clock, a reluctant expression crossing his face. "I have to head back to the diner soon," he said, his voice filled with regret. "But I'll be back again. And Lorelai said she would visit you tomorrow as well.”

Jess nodded, understanding but feeling a little apprehensive about being alone. "Yeah, okay."

Luke leaned forward, placing a reassuring hand on Jess's shoulder. "You’re gonna be okay, Jess. I’ll see you tomorrow."

"Thanks, Uncle Luke," Jess said, his voice barely above a whisper.

Luke stood up, giving Jess one last encouraging smile before heading out the door. As the room fell into silence once more, Jess closed his eyes, trying to find comfort in the thought of Luke’s return and the support of those who cared about him.

The first few days passed in a blur. Jess was feeling mostly okay and he was slowly adjusting back to the hospital routine. Luke and Lorelai kept visiting him and Lorelai brought him his own blanket and pillow from home to make him feel cozier and more comfortable. Jess didn’t even realize how much he had missed his thick blanket and the pillow that had perfectly adjusted to the shape of his head. That night he slept better than he ever had at the hospital.

By the end of his first five-day cycle of chemo, Jess was starting to feel the side effects. His body ached in places he didn’t even know could ache. His arms and legs felt tingly and numb and the oh-so-familiar nausea was slowly creeping in again. Jess’s mood spiraled as the symptoms came in. His emotional pain had to make room for a physical one, which Jess was actually quite happy to do. He found it easier to deal with physical pain.

The last time he was sick, Jess had lost the ability to walk as the numbness in his legs made it hard. As he spent more time off his feet, his muscles wither and he needed physical therapy to get back on his feet. This time he was determined to not let it happen. As much as he had liked his physiotherapist, Alex, Jess didn’t want him to torture him every week.

Pushing through the discomfort, Jess decided to take a walk around the hospital corridors. He gingerly got out of bed, his legs feeling like jelly beneath him. He grabbed hold of his IV pole, using it as both a support and a companion on his journey.

The hospital corridor was quiet, the fluorescent lights casting a sterile glow on the white walls. Jess shuffled slowly, each step a challenge but a victory nonetheless. His hospital pyjamas fluttered slightly with his movements, and he felt the cool metal of the IV pole in his hand, grounding him.

As he walked, he passed by other patients' rooms, some doors open with glimpses of lives momentarily paused by illness. He saw a young girl with a bald head drawing pictures on her bed. She had a woman sitting next to her on the bed, her hand placed gently on the little girl’s back. The woman turned to look at Jess, her eyes conveying her sympathy for him. The little girl lifted her head from the drawing too and looked at the boy.

“Hi, I’m Anna”, she said with a big smile. She couldn’t have been older than six. She was wearing pink pyjamas and her room was decorated with child-like drawings, most likely drawn by her. The mom put her arm on Anna’s shoulder, her face softening at her daughter’s friendliness.

Jess tried to steady himself when his feet wobbled a bit. “Hi Anna. I’m Jess”, he answered and managed a small smile as well. Normally he wasn’t one to talk to kids, he usually only tolerated them. But Anna seemed different. And Jess figured it wouldn’t hurt to try to be friendly.

“Are you sick too?” Anna asked him, eyeing the hospital pyjamas and the IV pole the boy was clutching for dear life.

“Yeah, I am”, Jess answered.

Anna's eyes widened slightly, but her smile didn’t falter. "Me too," she said, her voice filled with an innocence that tugged at Jess’s heart. "But Mommy says I’m really brave. Are you brave too?"

Jess chuckled softly, though it came out more as a wheeze. "I try to be."

Anna’s mom gave Jess an empathetic nod, her eyes filled with quiet strength. "Hi there, I’m Grace. The cancer ward isn’t a fun place to be in”, she said with a knowing look.

Jess nodded, tightening his grip on the IV pole. "Yeah, I know. It’s my second time.”

Grace looked at him with sad eyes. She stroked her daughter’s bald head, holding her close. “Anna got diagnosed a few months ago. It’s been a tough journey.” Jess nodded understandingly.

"Do you want to see my drawings?" Anna asked eagerly, holding up a crayon-covered piece of paper depicting a colorful, fantastical scene.

Jess hesitated for a moment, then nodded. "Sure, I’d love to."

Anna beamed and held out the drawing for Jess to see. He shuffled closer, peering at the vibrant colors. "Wow, that’s really good," he said, genuinely impressed. "You’re quite the artist."

Grace smiled proudly. "She’s been drawing ever since we got here. It keeps her spirits up."

Jess nodded, feeling a warmth spread through him that had nothing to do with the hospital room’s temperature. "That’s great, Anna. Keep it up."

"Thanks, Jess," Anna said, her smile radiant. "Maybe you can draw with me sometime."

Jess couldn’t help but smile back. "Maybe I will."

As Jess continued down the corridor, the brief interaction with Anna and her mother stayed with him, lightening his steps just a bit. He passed by more rooms, each with its own story, but Anna's bright smile and brave spirit lingered in his mind.

He made it to the end of the corridor, pausing to catch his breath. The journey back felt a bit easier, though his legs trembled with the effort. When he finally returned to his room, he was exhausted but filled with a sense of accomplishment and connection.

Collapsing onto his bed, Jess took a deep breath and stared at the ceiling. The pain was still there, the nausea still gnawing at him, but there was a flicker of hope now. He thought about Anna's bravery and her mother’s quiet strength. If a six-year-old could face this with such courage, then so could he.

As he lay back, Jess found himself looking forward to his next walk. Perhaps he would stop by Anna’s room again and see more of her drawings. Maybe he would even pick up a crayon himself, just to see if he still had any of that childhood creativity left in him.            

Chapter Text

Jess's earlier sense of accomplishment began to wane as the evening wore on. The ache in his body intensified, spreading from his legs and arms to his back and neck. The nausea, which had been a dull, manageable presence, grew sharper, making his stomach churn violently. His appetite was long gone and the only thought filling his head was just telling himself not to puke.

He lay in bed, every movement sending waves of discomfort through him. He tried to distract himself with his books, but the words blurred together, his concentration slipping away as the pain took over. Sweat beaded on his forehead, and he felt a chill despite the warmth of his blanket.

Just as he was contemplating pressing the call button for the nurse, the door to his room opened. It was Julie again, her eyes immediately noting his distress. She hurried over, her expression a mixture of concern and professionalism.

"Jess, you don’t look so good," she said softly, placing a cool hand on his forehead. "Let me get your vitals."

Jess nodded weakly, unable to muster the energy to speak. Julie quickly took his temperature, checked his blood pressure, and monitored his heart rate. Her brow furrowed slightly as she made notes on his chart.

"The chemo’s hitting you hard," she observed, her voice gentle. "I’m going to give you something stronger for the pain and nausea, okay?"

Jess managed a small nod, grateful for her efficiency and care. Julie prepared the medications, injecting them into his IV with practiced ease. He felt the cool liquid mix with the chemo, a slight relief washing over him as the medication began to take effect.

"Try to rest," Julie advised, smoothing the blankets over him. "I’ll be back to check on you in a little while."

Jess closed his eyes, focusing on his breathing as the painkillers dulled the sharp edges of his discomfort. The nausea ebbed slightly, allowing him to take deeper breaths without the fear of being sick.

Minutes turned into hours as Jess drifted in and out of a restless sleep. Dreams of hospital corridors and crayon drawings mingled with flashes of pain and nausea, creating a disorienting haze. At some point during the night, he felt a warm hand on his shoulder, and he opened his eyes to see Luke standing beside him.

"Hey, kid," Luke said softly, his face etched with worry. "Julie called and said you weren’t feeling great. Thought I’d come to check on you."

Jess felt guilty but also grateful to see his uncle. It was already dark out and he realized Julie’s call had probably woken the man up.

Luke pulled up a chair and sat down, ready to help ease Jess's discomfort. "You don’t have to talk. Just rest. I’m here."

Jess nodded, closing his eyes again. The combination of the medication and Luke’s calming presence made it a bit easier to bear the pain. He drifted back into a fitful sleep, comforted by the fact that he wasn’t alone.

The next morning, Jess woke up to find his room empty. He saw Luke’s car keys and his jacket by an armchair next to the window, which confirmed that the man hadn’t left yet but was probably just stretching his legs or down by the cafeteria getting breakfast.

The thought of breakfast was enough to send Jess over the edge and he quickly grabbed a sick bag that hung on the side of his bed. His stomach cramped as he only threw up some water he had drank the previous night. He gagged again and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. It was obvious that the meds effect had worn out during the night.

Jess leaned back against his pillow. He pulled his knees up and dropped his head against them, closing his eyes and hoping that he could be taken back to the dreamland where no pain could get him.

Just then, Luke walked back into the room, carrying a large coffee and a bag of pastries. He stopped by the door when he saw the state Jess was in.

“You okay kid?”

Jess simply shook his head. His eyes were closed, and he was gripping the sick bag in his hands like his life depended on it.

Luke left his breakfast on a table further from the bed and sat down next to the sick boy. He placed his hand on his back, trying to provide some comfort. He gave Jess a clean sick bag and emptied out the used one in the bathroom before returning to the same position.

“Should I call a nurse?” he asked after a while of silence. Jess shrugged his shoulders, still feeling too nauseous to talk.

Luke looked at Jess, his heart aching to see his nephew in so much pain. He reached over and pressed the call button for the nurse. Jess remained curled up, his face pale and sweaty, gripping the new sick bag tightly.

A few moments later, Julie walked in, her face immediately softening with concern when she saw Jess. "Good morning, Jess. I’m sorry you’re feeling so rough." She moved quickly to his side, her presence as calming as ever.

"Morning, Julie," Luke said quietly. "He’s been really nauseous. I think the meds wore off overnight."

Julie nodded, assessing Jess’s condition with a practiced eye. "I’ll get him something to help with the nausea and pain." She gently placed a hand on Jess's shoulder. "Hang in there, Jess. We’ll get you feeling better soon."

Jess nodded weakly. She left the room briefly and returned with a syringe of medication. She injected it into his IV port, and Jess felt the cool liquid mix with his bloodstream, bringing a gradual sense of relief.

"It might take a few minutes to kick in," Julie said softly. She fluffed the pillows behind Jess to make the boy more comfortable. "Try to relax and take slow, deep breaths."

Jess nodded again, closing his eyes and focusing on his breathing. The nausea slowly began to subside, and the pain dulled to a more manageable level. He felt Luke's steady hand on his back, a comforting presence that made the whole ordeal slightly more bearable.

Julie stayed for a while, monitoring Jess’s vitals and making sure he was stable. "If you need anything, don’t hesitate to call, okay?" she said before leaving the room.

Jess managed a small smile. "Thanks, Julie."

He was finally able to uncurl, and he straightened out his legs on the bed. He leaned against his pillow and with a deep sigh, he closed his eyes.

“Do you want me to stay with you for a bit? I have a reservation of a bigger party at the diner later but I’m sure Ceasar could handle- “

Luke was cut off by Jess’s tired voice. “You should go. I’ll be fine”, the boy said with his eyes still closed.

“Are you sure? I could stay with you if you need me”, Luke said and studied his nephew. He knew Jess wasn’t a little kid anymore and he could handle a lot on his own, but it didn’t make Luke any less guilty for leaving him on his own at the hospital.

Jess nodded. “I’m sure. I think I can manage laying here and feeling like crap on my own. Besides, someone has to make sure the diner doesn’t burn down."

Luke chuckled softly, appreciating the attempt at humor. "Alright, but I’ll be back later. If you need anything, you call me, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," Jess replied, waving a hand dismissively. "I’ll be fine."

Luke leaned in and gave Jess a quick, reassuring pat on the shoulder. "I’ll be back soon. Take it easy, kid."

“Not that I could attempt anything too crazy anyway.”

Jess watched as Luke gathered his things and headed toward the door. Just before leaving, Luke turned back one last time, his expression a mix of concern and determination. "I mean it, Jess. Call me if you need anything."

Jess nodded. "I will. Now go, before the diner descends into chaos."

Luke smiled, then reluctantly left the room. Jess listened to the sound of his footsteps fading down the hall, the silence of the hospital room closing in around him.

Jess closed his eyes again, trying to get comfortable. The medication was helping, but he still felt weak and exhausted. He let his mind wander, thinking about the conversation with Luke. As much as he appreciated the support, he couldn’t help but feel a pang of loneliness now that he was alone again.

As Jess lay in his hospital bed, the morning light filtering through the blinds, he heard the familiar sound of Dr. Parker's footsteps approaching. Dr. Parker had been his oncologist since his initial diagnosis, and if Jess trusted one person on earth, it would be Dr. Parker.

The door creaked open, and Dr. Parker walked in, a reassuring smile on his face. "Good morning, Jess. How are we feeling today?"

Jess managed a tired smile, his sarcasm intact despite his exhaustion. "Oh, just fantastic, Doc. Thought I'd take a stroll around the park later."

Dr. Parker chuckled, checking Jess’s chart and then looking him over with a practiced eye. "Well, you certainly still have your sense of humor. That’s a good sign. Any pain or nausea?"

"Yeah, both," Jess admitted. "But the meds are helping a bit. Still feels like I’ve been hit by a truck, though."

Dr. Parker nodded sympathetically. "That’s to be expected. Chemo can be rough on the body. We'll adjust your meds to keep you as comfortable as possible."

He took a seat next to Jess’s bed and began his examination, gently pressing on Jess's abdomen and checking his IV. "Any other symptoms I should know about? Dizziness, headaches?"

"Just the usual," Jess replied, wincing slightly as Dr. Parker pressed a particularly tender spot. "And a newfound appreciation for not throwing up every five minutes."

Dr. Parker made a few notes in Jess’s chart. "We’ll continue to monitor you closely. If anything feels off or you’re in too much pain, let the nurses know immediately."

"Yeah, yeah," Jess said, waving a hand dismissively. "I know the drill."

Dr. Parker smiled, standing up. "I’ll check in again later. Hang in there, Jess. You're doing great."

Jess rolled his eyes, but there was a hint of gratitude in his expression. "Thanks, Doc. I'll be here, living the dream."

As Dr. Parker left the room, Jess closed his eyes again, trying to find some semblance of comfort. The meds were helping, but the pain and fatigue were relentless. Still, he took a small measure of solace in the fact that he had a dedicated medical team looking out for him, and people who cared waiting for him to get through this.

Jess had his cell phone on the side table, and he was woken up from his doze when it started buzzing. His initial reaction was annoyance, but it all melted away when he saw Rory’s name appear on the screen.

“Hey”, Jess answered the phone, a small smile tugging at his lips when he imagined Rory on the other side of the line.

“Hi Jess. I miss you so much. How’re you feeling?” she asked with a tender voice.

Jess chuckled lightly. “I miss you too. I’m not feeling the best though.”

Rory’s concern was palpable through the phone. "I wish I could be there with you. It’s so hard being away, knowing what you’re going through."

Jess leaned back against his pillows, the comfort of Rory’s voice easing some of his discomfort. "It’s okay, Rory. I know you’re with your dad. How’s that going, by the way?"

"It’s... well, it’s going," Rory replied, her tone suggesting there was more to the story. "But I’d rather hear about you. Are the doctors taking good care of you? How’s Luke holding up?"

"Dr. Parker’s doing his rounds and making sure I’m not falling apart completely," Jess said with a small smirk. "And Luke’s... Luke. He’s been here every day, making sure I’m okay. He had to head back to the diner this morning, but he’ll be back later."

"That sounds like Luke," Rory said with a soft laugh. "I’m glad he’s there for you."

Jess’s expression softened, his voice tinged with longing. "Yeah, but I wish you were here too. I miss you."

"I miss you too, Jess," Rory said, her voice filled with emotion. "I’ll be back as soon as I can. I promise."

Jess closed his eyes, imagining Rory’s face, her reassuring presence beside him. "I know. Just hearing your voice helps. Makes it all a bit more bearable."

Rory smiled on the other end of the line. “So, how’s the treatment? What’s the plan with that?”

“I just finished my first chemo and now I have a bit of a break before the next cycle. They’ll do four rounds first and then I have a scan to see if my body is responding to the chemo. If it isn’t, I have to get a bone marrow transplant”, Jess explained.

Rory was quiet for a while, absorbing the information. “That sounds scary. The transplant I mean.”

“Yeah, it’s quite an intense treatment. It would be rough to get it, and I hope I won’t have to do it”, Jess spoke, fidgeting the blanket between his fingers.

Rory's voice was soft, filled with concern. "I hope you won’t have to either. But whatever happens, you’ll get through it. You’re strong, Jess."

Jess smiled, appreciating her confidence in him. "That’s what they keep telling me”, he remarked.

Rory's voice softened even more, filled with sincerity. "And they’re right. You are strong, Jess. You've already been through so much and you’re still fighting."

Jess let out a small sigh, his fingers still playing with the edge of the blanket. "Yeah, I guess. Some days it just feels... overwhelming."

"I know," Rory said gently. "But you’re not alone in this. You’ve got Luke, and you’ve got me. And everyone back in Stars Hollow is rooting for you."

Jess chuckled. “Yeah, the Stars Hollow folks just love me.”

“They do. You’re no longer the town hoodlum but the poor sick kid.”

“Somehow I really prefer the town hoodlum title.”

Rory laughed softly. "You know what you need? A distraction. How about I read you something? I brought the latest book from that author you like. I can read a few chapters to you."

Jess chuckled softly. "You’d do that for me?"

"Of course," Rory replied enthusiastically. "It’ll be like old times, when I read for you. Except, you know, over the phone."

Jess smiled, the memory of those peaceful afternoons in the park filling his mind. "Yeah, that sounds nice. I’d like that."

Rory began reading, her voice a soothing balm to Jess’s frayed nerves. As she read, Jess could feel some of the tension easing from his body. The story transported him away from the hospital room, if only for a little while. She was reading the Howl, the same copy that Jess had written his notes in the margins in.

Jess closed his eyes as he listened. He was imagining Rory sitting right next to him. He could almost smell her, feel her presence if he tried hard enough.

After a while, Rory paused. "How are you feeling now?"

"Better," Jess admitted. "Distracted, at least. Thanks, Rory."

"Anytime," Rory said with a smile in her voice. "I’ll keep reading for as long as you want."

They continued like this, Rory reading and Jess listening, until the weariness of the day finally caught up with him. He felt himself slipping away, sleep threatening to take him over. At least he could fall asleep to Rory’s soothing voice.

Rory stopped reading for a while, and she listened. She heard soft, rhythmic breathing coming from the other line. She smiled to herself and decided to keep going, hoping that the sound of her voice would help Jess rest easier.

Jess slept for a few hours, and he woke up with his phone on the floor, and its battery ran out. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and tried to manage the mess of bed hair he had accumulated, but with bad results. He managed to hobble to the toilet to empty his bladder and he contemplated whether he had enough energy to go on a little walk down the corridor. He decided no but he was sick of the bed, so he made his way to the armchair by the large window. He wheeled the IV pole next to the chair and pulled his knees to his chest before turning his gaze outside.

It was sunny outside, and Jess felt the warmth of the sun on his skin even through the glass. The view from his hospital room overlooked a small courtyard garden, meticulously maintained with bright flowers and neatly trimmed hedges. He could see the vibrant greens and the bursts of color from the blooming flowers. A gentle breeze rustled the leaves of the trees, casting playful shadows on the ground.

Jess let himself get lost in his thoughts. He used to be afraid of being inside his head. He still sometimes had scary thoughts, but he had learned that it was scarier to avoid them. Writing had helped him deal with a lot of stuff already. It felt good to get the things on paper. It was easier to let go of them once they were out.

He remembered the first time he had picked up a pen and just started writing, back when everything felt like it was closing in on him. The act of writing, the scratching of the pen on paper, had been cathartic. It was like emptying his mind of all the chaos and organizing it into something tangible, something he could look at and understand better.

Jess thought about the stories he had written and the characters he had created. Some of them were based on people he knew, like Rory and Luke, while others were purely fictional. They were a way for him to explore different lives and perspectives, to escape from his reality even if just for a little while.

After a while, Jess decided that he was ready for his walk now. He struggled to rise from the armchair but with the support of his IV pole, he managed to pull himself up. He pushed the door open and made his way to the quiet corridor of the pediatric cancer ward.

The hospital corridor was quiet, the soft hum of distant conversations and the occasional sound of footsteps echoing off the walls. Jess walked slowly, his steps measured and deliberate, mindful of the ache in his body.

He came to a stop in front of Anna's room. Through the small window in the door, he saw Anna and her mom playing inside. Anna's face lit up with joy as she showed her mom something she had drawn, and her mom clapped her hands in delight. Jess couldn't hear their voices from the corridor, but their expressions spoke volumes—love, laughter, and a bond that transcended the sterile hospital environment.

For a moment, Jess watched them, a bittersweet feeling washing over him. He felt a pang of envy for Anna, for her innocence and the simple happiness she seemed to find even in a hospital room. He wished he could be that carefree again, without the weight of illness and treatment hanging over him.

But then he saw Anna glance up and spot him standing in the corridor. Her eyes widened in surprise, and she waved excitedly at Jess. Her mom turned to see what had caught Anna's attention and smiled warmly at him through the window.

Jess hesitated for a moment, unsure whether to wave back or continue on his way. But Anna's enthusiasm was infectious, and despite himself, he found himself returning her wave with a small smile. It was a brief moment of connection, a reminder that even in the midst of hardship, there were moments of brightness and warmth.

Grace walked over to the door and opened it for him. “Hi Jess. Would you like to come in for a while? Anna would love to show you more of her drawings.”

Jess smiled a bit awkwardly, ready to decline the offer but as he looked at Anna’s hopeful face, he realized he couldn’t be the reason to turn that into a frown. “Oh, sure”, he answered and carefully made his way in.

Inside Anna's room, Jess was greeted by the cozy atmosphere that contrasted with the clinical surroundings of the hospital. The walls were adorned with Anna's colorful drawings, each one depicting scenes of whimsy and imagination. Jess couldn't help but admire the young girl's talent and creativity as he took a seat beside her bed.

Anna bounced with excitement, clutching her sketchbook close to her chest. "Look, Jess! I drew this one yesterday!" She eagerly flipped through the pages, showing him drawings of animals, flowers, and even a whimsical castle with a dragon flying overhead.

"These are amazing, Anna," Jess praised sincerely, his eyes tracing the vibrant lines and colors on the pages.

Grace joined them, pulling up a chair next to Jess. She smiled warmly at him, her eyes reflecting genuine concern. "How are you feeling today, Jess? Any improvement?"

Jess shrugged slightly, trying to muster a smile. "Eh, ups and downs," he admitted softly. "The chemo's been rough, but I guess that's expected."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Grace replied sympathetically, placing a comforting hand on Jess's arm. "I hope the side effects ease up soon. You're so strong, Jess."

Jess managed a small nod of gratitude, touched by her kindness. "Thanks," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper.

Anna, sensing the shift in mood, leaned closer to Jess. "Are you going to draw with me, Jess?" she asked eagerly, offering him another blank sheet of paper and a set of colored pencils.

Jess hesitated for a moment, glancing at Grace for reassurance. She nodded encouragingly, her eyes filled with understanding. With a faint smile, Jess accepted the paper and pencils from Anna. "Sure, I'd love to," he replied gently, setting the materials on his lap.

As Anna chattered happily about her drawings, Jess found himself drawn into the simple joy of creating art with her. He focused on the task at hand, letting the colors and shapes distract him from the discomfort and uncertainty of his own situation. For a while, the room was filled with the quiet rustling of paper and the occasional giggle from Anna.

In that moment, surrounded by warmth and acceptance, Jess allowed himself to forget about the hospital room and the treatments. He was grateful for the chance to share this small slice of normalcy with Anna and her mom, even if it was just for a fleeting moment.

As they continued to draw together, Jess felt a sense of peace settle over him. Despite everything he was going through, he knew that moments like these were what mattered most—connection, laughter, and the simple joy of being present in the moment.

Jess finished up his drawing of a green forest and she handed the drawing to Anna for her to observe. “It’s nice Jess. But the tree looks a bit funky. And the bird is so big compared to the bear”, she judged the drawing with a smile. She found it silly.

Jess chuckled softly at Anna's critique, amused by her innocent honesty. He glanced at the drawing of the green forest, taking in her observations.

"You think the tree looks funky, huh?" Jess said with a playful grin, leaning closer to examine the drawing again. "Maybe it's a magical tree that grows sideways. And the bird? Well, maybe it's just a really big bird trying to make friends with the bear."

Anna giggled at Jess's response, her eyes wide with amusement. "But bears and birds can't be friends!"

"You're right," Jess said, feigning seriousness. "I guess I need to work on my realism. But you're the artist here, Anna. I'm just the assistant."

Anna beamed proudly at Jess's acknowledgment, clearly enjoying their playful banter. She took the drawing from Jess and studied it again, her expression thoughtful.

"It's still a nice drawing," Anna finally conceded, looking up at Jess with a smile.

Jess grinned back at her. "Thanks, Anna. I appreciate your expert critique."

Anna giggled. “You just need to practice more. You can come draw with me again whenever you want.”

Jess nodded in agreement, feeling a warmth in his chest. "I just might. Thanks for letting me join in, Anna."

Anna nodded enthusiastically, already starting on another drawing with renewed energy. Jess watched her for a moment, grateful for the distraction and the genuine joy Anna brought into the room.

Jess bid his goodbyes to Anna and her mom. He decided to walk a bit further before returning to his room. The walk left him out of breath and sweaty and Jess decided that he needed a shower. He dug into his bag for some clean clothes and got a large white towel from the cupboard before heading to the shower.

Turning on the shower, Jess let the warm water cascade over him, washing away the physical weariness of the day. He scrubbed gently with the hospital-provided soap and made sure he was clean before turning off the water and stepping out of the shower.

The large mirror behind the sink was slightly fogged up but Jess could still see his reflection through it. Looking at himself in the mirror, he saw that his abdomen seemed more defined, his abs slightly more pronounced than before. He had been going to the gym before his relapse and he had been pleased with his results. Now with some inevitable weight loss, his abs were more visible.

"Huh, guess chemo has some unexpected perks," Jess muttered to himself with a wry smile, trying to find humor in the situation. He hadn't been focusing much on his appearance lately, but the weight loss from his treatment was becoming evident in subtle ways. Despite the positive spin he tried to put on it, he knew the weight loss wasn't entirely a good thing. He knew he wasn’t far from being underweight again.

Finishing his shower, Jess wrapped himself in the large white towel and dried off carefully. He put on his own clothes for the first time since being admitted and he felt more like himself than he had in days. The grey t-shirt and navy sweatpants were comfortable and brought a sense of normalcy to Jess.

His hair was still wet when Dr. Parker and Emily walked into the room. “Hi Jess”, they greeted him.

Emily stepped closer, her kind eyes meeting his. "We wanted to talk to you about inserting a port in your chest. Given your treatment plan, we think it will make things much easier for you."

Jess sighed, nodding. "Yeah, I figured this was coming. I know the drill.”

Dr. Parker smiled slightly. “Exactly. As you know, a port will give us easier access for your chemotherapy, blood draws, and any other medications you might need. It will save your veins from the constant needle sticks."

Jess looked down at his hands, feeling a mix of resignation and relief. "Yeah, I remember. It was a lot easier last time with the port."

Emily smiled gently. "I'm glad you think so. The procedure is quick, and you'll be under anesthesia, so you won't feel anything. We'll place it in your chest, just like last time."

Jess took a deep breath and nodded. "Alright, let's do it. When are we doing this?"

Dr. Parker checked his schedule. "We can arrange for it tomorrow morning. The sooner we get it in, the sooner we can make things more comfortable for you."

Jess appreciated the straightforwardness. "Okay, tomorrow morning then."

Emily placed a reassuring hand on Jess's arm. "You're doing great, Jess. This will really help in the long run."

Jess managed a weak smile. "Thanks, Emily. And thanks, Dr. Parker."

Dr. Parker stood up. "We'll take good care of you, Jess. Rest up today, and we'll see you tomorrow morning for the procedure."

As they left the room, Jess leaned back against his pillows, feeling a small sense of relief. At least with the port, he wouldn’t have to endure the constant pokes and prods. It was a small comfort in the midst of everything else, but right now, he’d take whatever he could get.

He settled back into his bed and tossed around until he found a comfortable position. He closed his eyes, imagining Rory beside him again. The thought of her comforted him enough that he managed to fall asleep, surrounded by the beeping monitors.

Chapter Text

The next morning, Jess woke up early, the nervous anticipation settling in his stomach. He had been through this before, but the thought of another surgical procedure still made him uneasy. The hospital room felt especially sterile and quiet as he waited for the nurse to come in and prepare him for the port insertion.

Around 7:00 AM, Emily entered the room with a reassuring smile. "Good morning, Jess. How are you feeling today?"

"Nervous, but ready to get this over with," Jess replied, trying to sound braver than he felt.

"That's perfectly normal," Emily said, as she began to check his vitals and ensure everything was in order. "You’re in good hands.”

A few minutes later, an orderly arrived with a gurney to transport Jess to the operating room. Jess gave a small wave to Emily as he was wheeled out, feeling the weight of anxiety settle in his stomach.

Jess was wheeled down the hallway, the fluorescent lights passing overhead in a rhythmic pattern. He closed his eyes, trying to steady his breathing and calm his racing heart. The trip to the operating room seemed both quick and endless at the same time.

Upon arrival, the surgical team greeted him with friendly smiles. Dr. Parker was there, already scrubbed in. "Good to see you, Jess. We're going to take good care of you today," he said warmly.

"Thanks, Dr. Parker," Jess replied, feeling a bit more at ease with the familiar face.

The anesthesiologist approached next, explaining the process. "Jess, we're going to give you some medication to help you relax, and then we'll administer the anesthesia. You'll be asleep for the procedure and won't feel a thing."

Jess nodded, trying to absorb the information through his nerves. "Okay. Just... make sure I wake up, alright?" he joked weakly.

The anesthesiologist chuckled. "We'll make sure of that, Jess. This is a standard operation and we have a good team here looking after you."

A nurse placed an oxygen mask over Jess's face and told him to take deep breaths. As the medication began to flow through his IV, he felt a wave of drowsiness wash over him. The last thing he remembered was the comforting sound of Dr. Parker's voice telling him everything would be fine.

When Jess woke up, he was back in his hospital room, feeling groggy and disoriented. The room was dimly lit, and he could hear the soft hum of the medical equipment. He reached up gingerly to touch the area on his chest where the port had been inserted, feeling a slight ache. He ran his finger around the port to see if it was really there and it surely was.

Emily came in a few minutes later to check on Jess. "How are you feeling, Jess?" she asked, her voice gentle.

"A bit sore, but okay," Jess replied.

"That's to be expected," Emily said, adjusting his blankets. "We'll keep an eye on you and make sure you're comfortable. If you need anything, just let us know." She peaked under his gown through the neckline and hummed in satisfaction when everything looked fine. Only then did Jess realize that his shirt had been changed to a gown.

Jess nodded slowly, feeling the slight ache in his chest. It felt like someone was constantly pushing their finger into him. The room felt empty, and he couldn't help but wish Luke or Rory were there. He knew they would come later though and that they couldn’t always rush to the hospital whenever he was feeling bad. They could never leave if they followed that protocol. But lately loneliness had started to way down on him whenever he was left alone. He didn’t really know where that came from but he was hoping he’d overcome it soon because he hated the feeling.

He spent the next few hours falling in and out of sleep and trying to beat the grogginess from anesthesia. When he was on yet another of his awake periods, the door to Jess's room opened, and Lorelai and Luke walked in. Jess managed a small smile, feeling a surge of comfort in their presence. Finally, he wasn’t alone anymore.

"Hey, kiddo," Lorelai said, her voice soft and filled with concern. "How are you feeling?"

Jess shrugged, trying to put on a brave face. "Better," he said nonchalantly. "Just tired."

Luke stepped closer, his eyes scanning Jess's face. "You look better. Dr. Parker said the procedure went well."

"Yeah, it did," Jess replied. "Just sore."

The adults settled on the side of his bed. Luke’s eyes landed on the tray of food that lay untouched on the bedside table. “Don’t have much of an appetite?” he asked, nodding towards the tray.

“Would you eat that?” Jess answered the question with a question. On the tray, there were three barely cooked potatoes, carrots that you could probably use as crayons, and some suspicious-looking meat. On the side, there was a cup of pudding and a water glass.

“I’d eat the pudding”, Lorelai chimed in.

“Go ahead”, Jess answered, rolling his eyes.

“You don’t want it?” she asked.

“Nah, I’m not hungry.”

“Have you eaten anything today, Jess?” his uncle asked, but he already knew the answer. Luke was afraid this would happen, just like it did last time. He knew the chemo took the boy’s appetite and in return made him so nauseous a sip of water would make him throw up. But it was still worrying to see.

“I’ve been nauseous”, Jess answered, not really answering the question.

Luke and Lorelai exchanged a worried glance. Luke knew that the nausea was a common side effect of the chemo, but he also knew Jess couldn't afford to skip meals.

"You've got to eat something, even if it's just a little bit," Luke said, trying to keep his voice steady but failing to hide the concern. "How about I bring you something from the diner? Anything you want."

Jess shook his head, looking exhausted. "Nothing really sounds good right now. Maybe later."

Lorelai decided to change tactics, lightening the mood. "How about some of Sookie's special soup? It’s like a warm hug in a bowl. I can sneak some in for you."

Jess managed a small smile. "Soup does sound better. Is it any good?”

“Any good? This is Sookie we’re talking about. It’s delicious.”

Lorelai smiled, already planning to call Sookie. "I'll get it sorted. You need to eat, Jess. Even just a little."

Jess sighed, knowing they were right but still feeling the weight of the nausea. "I know, I know. I'll try."

Lorelai reached over and ruffled Jess's hair affectionately. "Good. And in the meantime, maybe we can find something else to distract you. A movie, maybe? Or more of Hemingway?"

Jess chuckled lightly, grateful for their presence and their efforts to keep his spirits up. "A movie sounds good. Something light."

Luke and Lorelai looked at each other, relieved to see Jess engaging with them, even if it wasn’t anything groundbreaking. "Alright," Luke said, taking the remote in his hand. "I'll find us something to watch. And then I'll head out to get that soup."

As Luke searched for a movie, Lorelai turned her attention back to Jess. "You know, if you ever feel up to it, we can play some card games. I'm a master at Go Fish."

Jess laughed, a genuine sound that felt like a small victory for all of them. "I'll take you up on that. But only if you promise not to cheat."

"Scout's honor," Lorelai said with a grin.

Luke finally settled on a light-hearted comedy and set it up on the small TV in Jess's room. As the movie started, he stood up, ready to head out for the soup. "I'll be back soon. You two behave."

Lorelai gave him a mock salute. "You got it, boss."

Jess watched as Luke left, feeling a strange warm feeling in him that he hadn’t felt often. Despite everything, he was grateful for their support. As the movie played, he leaned back into his pillows, feeling a little more at ease.

As the movie played, Jess and Lorelai chatted quietly, and the light-hearted comedy provided a comfortable background noise. Lorelai kept glancing at Jess, making sure he was still engaged.

"So, Jess," Lorelai began casually, "did Luke mention that Rory is coming home this weekend?"

Jess's eyes lit up slightly at the mention of Rory. "No, he didn't. That's great news."

Lorelai smiled, noticing the subtle change in Jess's demeanor. "Yeah, she's really excited to see you. She talks about you all the time, you know."

Jess's face softened, a small smile forming. "I miss her. It'll be good to see her."

Lorelai nodded, her expression turning more serious. "She misses you too, Jess. A lot. And she's really worried about you."

Jess sighed, looking down at his hands. "I know. I hate that she has to worry about me."

"She worries because she cares," Lorelai said gently. "We're all here for you, Jess. You don't have to go through this alone."

Jess nodded, appreciating the sentiment but not really knowing how to accept it. "I know. It's just hard sometimes."

Lorelai reached over and placed a hand on his arm. "We know it's hard, but you're doing great. And having Rory around will definitely lift your spirits."

Jess nodded again, feeling a bit more hopeful. "Yeah, it will. Thanks, Lorelai."

"Anytime, kiddo," she replied with a warm smile. "Now, let's focus on the movie and forget about all this serious stuff for a while."

Jess chuckled softly. "Deal."

They both turned their attention back to the screen, letting the humor of the movie fill the room. For a little while, at least, Jess felt like a normal teenager, laughing along with Lorelai and forgetting about the sickness that had taken over his life.

As the movie continued, Jess began to feel the familiar creeping of nausea and a dull ache spreading through his body. He shifted uncomfortably, trying to find a position that alleviated the discomfort. Lorelai, perceptive as always, noticed the change in his state.

Jess attempted to keep his face neutral, but the effort only made him more visibly tense. Lorelai watched him for a few moments, her concern growing. She knew Jess well enough to recognize when he was trying to tough it out.

"Jess," she said softly, leaning closer to him, "Are you okay?"

He forced a smile and nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just... a little tired, that's all."

Lorelai's eyes narrowed slightly as she studied him. "You sure? You don't look like you're just tired."

Jess shifted again, wincing slightly as a wave of pain hit him. "It's nothing. Really, Lorelai. Just a bad moment. It'll pass."

Lorelai sighed, her expression softening with empathy. "Jess, you don't have to pretend with me. If you're feeling bad, it's okay to say so."

He swallowed hard, the nausea making it difficult to respond. "I just... I don't want to ruin the evening."

"Hey," she said, her tone gentle but firm, "You're not ruining anything. We're here to be with you, no matter how you're feeling."

Jess closed his eyes briefly, the pain and nausea intensifying. "It's just... the usual stuff. Nausea, aches. It's hitting harder now."

Lorelai nodded understandingly. "Okay. Let's get you comfortable. Do you want me to call a nurse?"

Jess shook his head. "No, not yet. Just... help me sit up a bit more."

She helped him adjust his pillows, propping him up to relieve some of the discomfort. "How's that?"

"Better," Jess said, though his voice was still strained.

Lorelai sat back down next to him, her presence reassuring. "We'll take it one moment at a time, okay? And if you need anything, you just let me know."

Jess nodded, grateful for her understanding. "Thanks, Lorelai."

"Anytime, kiddo," she replied softly. "Now, let's see if we can make it through the rest of this movie. And remember, you're not alone in this."

Jess managed a small smile. They both turned their attention back to the screen, Lorelai keeping a watchful eye on him as the movie played on. She noticed how Jess’s fingers were fidgeting with the edge of the blanket. She saw him occasionally close his eyes, his brow furrowing as he tried to push through a wave of nausea. She noticed how his eyes flickered back and forth, not really following the scenes, and how he occasionally bit his lip as if to keep from groaning.

Luke returned to the room with a bowl of soup, the aroma filling the air as he set it down on the bedside table. Lorelai gave him a small, encouraging nod, and Luke turned to Jess, who was now lying back against the pillows, his eyes half-open.

“Hey, kid, I brought you some soup. Think you can manage a few bites?” Luke asked gently, his voice filled with concern.

Jess opened his eyes fully, looking at the bowl of soup. He felt too tired to protest and nodded slightly. “Yeah, I’ll try.”

Luke carefully helped Jess sit up a bit more, adjusting the pillows behind him for support. He handed him a spoon and the bowl, and Jess took it with shaky hands. The first spoonful was tentative, but the warm, soothing liquid seemed to calm his stomach slightly.

“Thanks, Luke,” Jess murmured after a few more spoonfuls. His grip on the spoon was weak, but he managed to finish a good portion of the soup.

“You’re doing great, Jess,” Lorelai said softly, her eyes filled with empathy. “Take your time.”

After finishing as much as he could, Jess handed the bowl back to Luke, his movements slow and deliberate. “That’s all I can manage,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

“That’s okay,” Luke replied, taking the bowl and setting it aside. “You did good.”

Not long after, Jess’s eyelids grew heavy, and he started to drift off. Lorelai and Luke exchanged a knowing glance, understanding that he needed his rest. Luke gently tucked the blanket around Jess, making sure he was comfortable.

Jess mumbled something incoherent as he fell asleep, his breathing gradually evening out. Lorelai sat back in her chair, watching him with a mixture of sadness and hope.

Luke pulled up a chair next to her, both of them sitting in silence for a moment, the only sound being Jess’s steady breathing. As they sat vigil by Jess's bedside, watching him sleep, Lorelai leaned in closer to Luke, her voice low and concerned.

"You know, earlier when we were watching the movie, he was trying so hard to act like everything was fine," Lorelai began, her gaze fixed on Jess's peaceful face. "But I could see it, Luke. The way he kept biting his lip and closing his eyes.”

Luke nodded slowly, his brow furrowed with worry. "He's always been like that. Tries to tough it out on his own."

"Yeah, I know," Lorelai sighed softly, her eyes never leaving Jess. "It's just hard seeing him like this. He shouldn't have to go through all of this."

“I know, Lorelai. But he's strong. He's been through worse."

“I’m just worried about him. The doctor did say that the relapse is harder to treat.”

Luke held her hand and stroked his thumb on hers. “I know,” he said quietly. “I’m worried too”, Luke admitted.

Jess stirred awake for a bit, blinking slowly against the dim hospital light, he found Lorelai and Luke beside him, their expressions a mix of concern and affection. He was groggy and surprised that the two were still there, watching over him.

"Hey," he rasped, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Hey yourself," Lorelai replied gently, eyeing the boy with concern. "How're you feeling now, kiddo?"

Jess shrugged lightly, a small grimace crossing his face. "Could be better," he admitted quietly.

Luke adjusted the blanket around Jess's shoulders, ensuring he was comfortable. "You need anything before we head out?" he asked, his voice filled with quiet concern.

Jess shook his head slowly. "Nah, I'm okay. Thanks for the soup," he managed to say, his voice trailing off slightly.

Lorelai leaned in closer, her hand finding his. "You call us if you need anything, alright? We're just a phone call away."

"I will," Jess assured them, his eyes closing briefly as weariness washed over him.

Luke squeezed his shoulder gently, exchanging a look with Lorelai that spoke volumes of their shared worry and love for Jess. "Get some rest now. We'll see you soon," he said softly. With a final glance at Jess, Lorelai and Luke reluctantly left the room, their steps heavy with concern as they walked down the quiet hospital corridor. They paused briefly outside, leaning against the wall.

"I hate seeing him like this," Lorelai murmured, her voice catching with emotion.

Luke wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close. "I know, me too," he admitted quietly. "But we'll get through this. Jess is strong."

"I hope so," Lorelai whispered, her gaze fixed on the floor. "I just hope so."

They stood together in silence for a moment longer, drawing comfort from each other's presence before heading home, their thoughts consumed by Jess and the uncertain road ahead.

It was pitch black outside when Jess woke up from his slumber. Lights of the hallway were sliding in from under the door but they didn’t light up the room enough for Jess’s liking so he reached over to the side table and turned on the table lamp.

He took a deep breath. He was relieved he woke up from his dream. He had had the same haunting dream for a while now. He took his notebook from under his pillow and turned to an empty page.

I had the dream again. I’m in my old school, walking in the hallway. The lights are turned off. I reach a door that’s open and shines in light. Liz’s there and she is yelling on the phone. “THAT KID IS RUINING MY LIFE”, she yells. I see myself in the corner. Then the door is slammed closed and I continue down the hallway. I hear footsteps behind me getting louder and louder. Then someone pushes me to the ground from behind. They hit and kick me. I escape and run as fast as I can. They chase me. I go outside and look behind me to see my old bullies chasing me. There’s Liz’s old boyfriends too. They’re all yelling how they want to hurt me and how pathetic I am. I see Luke’s diner and try to hide there, but the front door is locked. I bang the door. No one opens it. I sink to the ground and close my eyes, hoping that I wake up before the angry mob of people reach me. Tonight I did. But sometimes I don’t.

Usually I don’t have the same nightmare twice. It’s weird I’m getting this one so often. Every time it scares me just as much though. Rory once asked me if I thought I had had a bad childhood. I couldn’t answer her. I didn’t realize you weren’t meant to be scared going home every day as a kid. It was normal for me. Many things were that I later realized shouldn’t have been. Like the teacher sharing her lunch with me because Liz never packed any. Or when I never knew what Santa Claus and Easter Bunny were. I always thought adults were meant to be mean and scary and they had to hit you so you would grow up right. I thought they were meant to burn you with cigarettes and slap you in the face when you were “being disrespectful.” I didn’t realize I had a bad childhood until later, but I did realize I was different even back then. I think the other kids could sense it too. I don’t know why else they would’ve been so mean otherwise. I used to love school before they ruined it for me. Because of them, I was afraid of going to school but also of going home. I had no safe place. I never had one until Luke came along. God, I feel like such a fuss writing this all. No one better ever read this.

The movement behind his door alerted Jess and he quickly glanced up from his journal, his heart skipping a beat as he saw Julie step into the room. Not wanting anyone to read his private thoughts, he hurriedly tucked the journal under his pillow, trying to act nonchalant.

Julie, ever perceptive, noticed the movement but chose not to comment on it. She approached Jess's bed with a warm smile.

"Hey there, night owl," she greeted softly, her voice a gentle murmur in the quiet room. "Couldn't sleep?"

“Not really. I had some stuff in my mind”, he answered, brushing his hand through his hair.

Julie nodded understandingly, pulling up a chair beside his bed. "That's completely normal. How are you feeling?"

“Alright, I think”, Jess answered, deciding to give a serious answer instead of his usual sarcastic one.

“That’s good to hear. I just need to check your vitals and you can go back to bed.”

Jess sighed but nodded, knowing the routine by now. He watched as Julie efficiently went about her task, her hands gentle and movements precise. Despite the clinical nature of the check-up, there was a comforting familiarity and gentleness to it.

Julie moved with the practiced efficiency of someone who had done this countless times before. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small flashlight, shining it gently into Jess’s eyes to check his pupil response. This wasn’t usually part of Jess’s normal checkup, but it was required after getting anesthesia. “You know, my son’s eyes are the exact same color as yours”, she said as she was checking his pupils.

“Huh”, Jess hummed and blinked his eyes after having a bright light shined on them.

Julie chuckled. “He is around your age too. You remind me of him a lot. You’re both just as sarcastic”, she laughed softly. Jess smiled a bit too. No wonder Julie always seemed so motherly to him. She saw her own son in him.

Next, she pulled out a digital thermometer and placed it gently under Jess’s tongue. While waiting for the reading, she wrapped a blood pressure cuff around his upper arm. She squeezed the pump a few times, inflating the cuff until it was snug. Jess could feel the pressure tightening around his arm but remained still, knowing the procedure well.

The thermometer beeped, and Julie removed it, reading the display with a small nod. “Your temperature’s looking alright, but it’s a bit higher than before. Don’t hesitate to tell us if you start feeling feverish.” Jess nodded, his eyes already starting to close from tiredness.

She then slowly released the pressure from the cuff, listening intently with her stethoscope as the gauge on the cuff showed the numbers. “Blood pressure’s looking stable too,” she noted, making a few quick notes on her chart.

Julie then took out a pulse oximeter, a small device she clipped onto Jess’s fingertip to measure his oxygen levels. The device blinked a few times before displaying a reading. “Oxygen levels are good,” she said with a satisfied smile.

Finally, she placed her stethoscope on Jess’s chest and back, instructing him to take deep breaths. Jess complied, feeling the coolness of the stethoscope against his skin as he inhaled and exhaled. “Lungs sound clear,” Julie confirmed, jotting down more notes.

Throughout the process, her hands were gentle and her manner reassuring. She moved with quiet confidence, ensuring that Jess felt at ease. As she finished up, she gave his shoulder a comforting squeeze. “You’re doing great, Jess. Just keep taking it one day at a time.”

As she left, Jess laid back down on the bed and pulled his blanket up to his shoulders. He thanked Lorelai every day for bringing his own comforter from home. It made it so much easier to fall asleep. He could almost pretend he was in his own bed.

Chapter Text

The next morning, Jess woke up to the sound of the door creaking open. He rubbed his eyes and looked up, expecting to see Julie or one of the familiar nurses. Instead, a new face entered the room. She was tall, with a stern expression and an air of impatience about her. Jess immediately felt uneasy.

"Good morning, Mr. Mariano," she said briskly, her tone clipped and unfriendly. "I'm Nurse Gemma. I'll be taking care of you today."

Jess gave her a nod, still groggy from sleep. "Morning," he mumbled, his voice rough. He rubbed sleep off his eyes. It was still too early for his liking, especially since he was awake for quite some time in the middle of the night.

”Why aren’t you wearing the hospital pyjamas?” Gemma asked with narrowed eyes. She was scanning Jess up and down with her eyes.

”They’re not that comfy. I was told I can wear whatever I want”, Jess answered. He could sense her disapproval.

Gemma rolled her eyes at him. ”It’s not about being “comfy” but practicality for the nurses”, she snapped at him.

Jess felt his patience wearing thin. "Well, I'm the one stuck in this bed all day, so I think I should get a say in what I wear," he replied, his tone sharp.

Gemma's expression hardened. "It's not up for debate. Put on the hospital pyjamas next time."

Jess didn’t like the snappy atmosphere Gemma was bringing into his room. It was like he was doing everything wrong in her eyes. Was it so wrong of him to want to be comfortable while arguably going through the toughest time of his life? A little more compassion wouldn’t hurt the nurse.

She went straight to his bedside table and picked up his chart, flipping through it with a critical eye. "I see you didn't eat much of your dinner last night," she said, her tone sharp.

Jess shrugged. "Wasn't hungry."

She huffed, clearly unimpressed. "Well, you need to eat. Nutrition is vital, especially in your condition."

Jess rolled his eyes slightly but didn't say anything. He was used to this sort of lecture, though it was usually delivered with more compassion.

”If you continue to refuse to eat, we’ll have to put a feeding tube into you.”

Jess didn’t answer but eyed the woman with a suspicious look. She must be bluffing, he thought. Never had that option been discussed before and Jess was way more underweight the last time he was treated.

Gemma moved on to the vitals check, her movements quick and somewhat rough. She wrapped the blood pressure cuff around his arm, inflating it with a bit more force than necessary. Jess winced but kept quiet, biting down on his lower lip to stifle any sound of discomfort. The pressure built up painfully, and he could feel the tight band digging into his skin.

"Just relax," Gemma muttered, though her tone held little patience.

Jess didn't respond, his eyes fixed on a spot on the wall as he tried to focus on anything but the discomfort. After what felt like an eternity, the cuff finally deflated, leaving a dull ache in his arm.

Next, Gemma took the thermometer and roughly inserted it under his tongue without a word of instruction. Jess flinched slightly at the unexpected movement, feeling the hard plastic pressing uncomfortably against the sensitive skin inside his mouth. The thermometer beeped, and she yanked it out, glancing at the reading with a frown.

"Temperature's a bit high," she noted coldly, scribbling in his chart.

Jess sighed, trying to remain calm despite his growing frustration. Gemma's brusque manner was making an already unpleasant experience even worse. He shifted slightly, his body tense as she moved on to check his pulse.

She grabbed his wrist with an unnecessarily firm grip, her fingers pressing down hard on his radial artery. Jess gritted his teeth, trying to ignore the pain. He could feel his pulse quickening, more from annoyance and discomfort than anything else.

"Hold still," she snapped, clearly irritated.

"I'm trying," Jess muttered under his breath, his patience wearing thin.

Gemma shot him a sharp look but didn't say anything. She finally released his wrist and made more notes on his chart, her expression stern. She seemed determined to finish her tasks as quickly as possible, with little regard for Jess's comfort.

"How's your pain level today?" she asked, her tone more like a demand than a question.

"It's manageable," Jess replied, trying to keep his voice even.

"Manageable isn't good enough," she snapped. "You need to communicate more clearly so we can manage your pain properly. Or do you like feeling this way?"

Jess felt a flash of irritation. "It's a six," he said flatly.

She nodded curtly. "I'll be back with your medications soon. And try to eat your breakfast when it arrives," she ordered before turning on her heel and leaving the room without a second glance.

Jess watched her go, his jaw clenched in frustration. He rubbed his arm where the blood pressure cuff had left a faint red mark, feeling a mix of anger and helplessness. He felt annoyed that nurses could just treat him any way they wanted just because he was a vulnerable patient. Sure, most nurses that treated him were lovely and compassionate which only made nurses like Gemma stand out. But there was nothing Jess could do about it.

As he lay back against his pillows, trying to calm his racing heart, he couldn't help but feel a pang of longing for the kindness and warmth of nurses like Emily. He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath to steady himself. The previous day's warmth and understanding from Julie felt like a distant memory

He hoped that Gemma's shift would end soon and that someone more compassionate would take her place. Until then, he would have to find a way to endure her rough treatment and focus on his recovery.

Gemma returned with his medications, she practically slammed them down on the bedside table. "Here," she said curtly. "Take these now."

Jess took the pills, washing them down with a sip of water. "Thanks," he muttered, trying to keep the sarcasm out of his voice.

"Don't mention it," she replied, not catching or ignoring his tone. "And eat your breakfast. If you don't, I'll have to report it to Dr. Parker."

Jess glanced at the unappetizing tray of food that had just been delivered. "Yeah, sure," he said, knowing full well he wouldn't touch it.

Gemma narrowed her eyes at him. "I mean it, Mr. Mariano. You're not helping yourself by being difficult."

"Got it," Jess replied, not bothering to hide his annoyance now.

She narrowed her eyes at him. "You know, you could show a little more appreciation for the care you're receiving here. You're lucky to be here, you know. This is a pediatric hospital, after all. They could have sent you somewhere else."

Jess rolled his eyes. "Yeah, lucky me," he muttered under his breath.

Nurse Gemma's lips tightened into a thin line. "Excuse me? What did you just say?" she demanded.

Jess looked her straight in the eye. "I said, 'lucky me,'" he repeated, louder this time, his tone dripping with sarcasm.

She glared at him, clearly not amused. "You need to adjust that attitude of yours, Mr. Mariano. This isn't a hotel; it's a hospital. We're here to help you, but you need to meet us halfway."

Jess just stared at her, his expression blank. "Right," he said, not bothering to argue.

With an exasperated sigh, Gemma pulled out his chart and began scribbling notes. Jess craned his neck slightly to see what she was writing but couldn't make out the words.

"What are you writing?" he asked, trying to keep his voice steady.

"Just noting your...less-than-cooperative attitude," she replied curtly. "The doctors need to know everything about your behavior, not just your physical symptoms."

Jess clenched his jaw, feeling a mix of anger and helplessness. "Whatever," he said, turning his head away from her.

Gemma snapped the chart shut. "I'll be back later to check on you again. Try to rest and maybe think about being a bit more grateful," she said before leaving the room, her footsteps echoing down the hallway.

As the door closed behind her, Jess let out a long sigh. He felt drained, both physically and emotionally. He knew he needed to keep his temper in check, but Nurse Gemma was really testing his limits. He reached under his pillow for his journal again, deciding to write about the encounter to help calm his nerves. Maybe putting his frustrations on paper would help him deal with them better than snapping at the staff.

That bitch is completely insane. Telling me to be grateful? Would you be grateful if you had leukemia? Twice. And writing that shit down in my chart? Oh please, get a life. It’s not like Dr. Parker cares and he knows me way better than she does. I only have attitude if they have attitude with me. What goes around comes around. I don’t know why she had a problem with me. Better hope she doesn’t treat me more from now on. I can’t fucking stand her.

After Gemma's visit, Jess buried himself in a book, trying to escape into a world far removed from his hospital room. The rhythmic turning of the pages and the familiar scent of paper provided a small comfort amidst the chaos of his thoughts. He felt certain discomfort growing inside of him but he decided to try to ignore it. He didn’t want to interact with Gemma any more than he absolutely had to.

However, Jess’s condition worsened as the minutes ticked by. The room seemed to spin, and his nausea intensified, leaving him breathless and in excruciating pain. The fever was making his head pound, and every movement felt like a monumental effort. He clutched the side of his bed, his knuckles white, trying to steady himself.

Despite his reluctance, Jess knew he couldn’t handle it alone. He reached for the call button, his hand trembling as he pressed it, praying silently that it wouldn’t be Gemma who answered. He closed his eyes, willing himself to stay calm, but the dizziness and pain were overwhelming.

A few moments later, the door swung open, and Jess’s heart sank when he saw Gemma enter. Her expression was as cold and indifferent as ever. She walked to his bedside with a clinical detachment that made Jess’s skin crawl.

“What is it now?” she asked, her tone curt and dismissive.

Jess struggled to form the words, his voice weak. “I—I’m really not feeling well. My head’s pounding, I’m dizzy, and I think the fever has spiked. Can you please get me something for the pain? Anything?”

Gemma rolled her eyes, her patience visibly wearing thin. “You don’t need medication, Jess. You just have to toughen it out. You’re in a hospital, it’s supposed to be uncomfortable.”

Jess’s eyes widened in disbelief, the desperation in his voice growing. “But I can’t handle this. It hurts too much. Please, just give me something. I don’t care what, just something to make it stop.”

Gemma crossed her arms, her stance dismissive. “You’re being dramatic. You need to learn to deal with it. We can’t just keep pumping you with meds every time you feel uncomfortable. It’s not good for you.”

Jess clenched his jaw, frustration, and anger bubbling up inside him. “I’m not being dramatic. I’m in pain, and I need help. Isn’t that what you’re here for?”

Gemma stared at him for a moment, her eyes cold and unyielding. “I’m here to take care of you, but I’m not here to cater to your every whim. You need to show some grit. If you can’t handle it, that’s on you.”

Jess’s chest tightened. He was feeling so ill and he was frustrated he wasn’t taken seriously. His eyes threatened to water but he wouldn’t give Gemma the satisfaction. He wanted to scream, to lash out, but all he could manage was a choked, “Fine. Just... just leave me alone then.”

Gemma shrugged, her expression indifferent. “Suit yourself.” She turned on her heel and left the room, the door closing with a harsh click behind her.

Jess lay back against his pillows, the pain and dizziness relentless. The room was spinning, and the silence that followed Gemma’s departure was deafening. He felt so alone, so insignificant and unimportant. No other nurse had ever dismissed his pain like that. He closed his eyes, trying to block out the agony and the overwhelming sense of helplessness. Gemma's harsh words echoed in his mind, making him feel even more isolated. The physical pain was bad enough, but the emotional sting of being treated so callously cut even deeper.

Jess stared at the ceiling, the room growing darker as the fever took hold. His skin was clammy, alternating between shivering and sweating, and his body ached with a pain that seemed to penetrate to his very bones. The thought of enduring this without any help felt like too much to bear. His breaths came in short, labored gasps, each one a struggle against the tightening grip of discomfort and despair.

He closed his eyes, tears streaming down his face, and prayed for some relief, any sign that someone, anyone, would come to help him. The isolation of the hospital room seemed to press down on him, amplifying his pain and sense of abandonment. His mind drifted to thoughts of Luke and Lorelai, their comforting presence and unwavering support.

Jess wished with every fiber of his being that Luke would walk through the door, his familiar face bringing a rush of reassurance. He imagined Luke’s stern yet caring voice, ready to tell Gemma off for her cruelty. Luke wouldn’t tolerate anyone treating him so poorly; he’d demand to see Dr. Parker, ensuring that Jess received the care he needed.

In his fevered state, Jess’s imagination played out the scene vividly. Luke would stride into the room, eyes blazing with protective fury. He’d confront Gemma, his voice firm and unyielding. “You can’t treat him like this. He’s in pain, and you’re supposed to help him, not make it worse,” Luke would say, his words echoing with righteous anger.

Jess could almost hear Dr. Parker’s voice, calm but authoritative, as he assessed the situation and took immediate action to alleviate Jess’s suffering. The thought of their combined efforts, their genuine concern for his well-being, brought a fleeting sense of comfort to Jess’s fever-addled mind.

But as the minutes dragged on and the pain intensified, Jess’s hope began to wane. He felt trapped in a cycle of agony, each wave of pain crashing over him with relentless force. His body trembled uncontrollably, his muscles twitching in response to the fever’s relentless assault. The tears continued to fall, mingling with the sweat on his face, and he felt a deep sense of hopelessness.

The room seemed to close in on him, the walls pressing tighter and tighter. He wanted to call out, to scream for help, but his voice felt weak, swallowed by the overwhelming pain and exhaustion. The silent room mocked his suffering, amplifying his sense of isolation.

Jess’s thoughts grew more disjointed, fragmented by the intensity of his fever. He clung to the image of Luke and Dr. Parker, their presence a distant but comforting beacon in the storm of his pain. He knew he couldn’t endure this much longer; something had to give.

Just as despair threatened to engulf him completely, the door creaked open, and the familiar figure of Dr. Parker stepped into the room. The doctor’s expression shifted to one of immediate concern as he took in the sight of Jess, writhing in pain, sweat-soaked and pale.

“Jess, what’s going on?” Dr. Parker asked, moving quickly to his side. He placed a reassuring hand on Jess’s shoulder, trying to calm him.

Jess’s voice was a strained whisper, tears of frustration and pain in his eyes. “Gemma... she wouldn’t give me anything. Said I had to tough it out. I can’t... it hurts so much.” His fists were clenched tightly, the knuckles white, and his body trembled slightly, both from the fever and the intensity of his emotions.

Dr. Parker’s face darkened with a frown, his tone becoming more urgent. “Alright, Jess. Hang in there, we’ll get this sorted.”

He quickly examined Jess, checking his vitals with practiced efficiency. The concern on his face deepened as he noted the fever and the obvious signs of severe discomfort.

“Gemma!” Dr. Parker called out sharply, his voice carrying through the hallway. When there was no immediate response, he turned back to Jess. “I’m going to get you something for the pain and the fever right away. This should never have happened.”

Jess nodded weakly, relief mingling with the pain. “Thank you,” he whispered, his voice barely audible.

Dr. Parker left the room briefly, returning with another nurse, Emily, who had always been kind and attentive. She brought a tray with medication and a fresh IV bag.

“Hey, Jess,” Emily said softly, her presence a calming balm. “We’re going to get you feeling better, okay?”

Jess nodded, unable to muster more than that. He watched as Dr. Parker and Emily worked quickly and efficiently. The IV was replaced, and the medication was administered. He felt the first wave of relief just knowing that he was getting meds and there were people who took his pain seriously. Their hands felt comforting on him, gentle and caring which was far from the earlier roughness of Gemma.

Dr. Parker stayed by his side, his expression one of gentle concern. “You’re going to be alright, Jess. I’ll make sure that you get the care you need. Gemma’s behavior was unacceptable, and it won’t happen again.”

Jess’s eyes fluttered closed as the medication took effect, pulling him towards a much-needed sleep. He mumbled a soft “thank you” before drifting off, the pain finally receding to a manageable level.

Dr. Parker watched him for a moment, then turned to Emily. “We need a full report on Gemma’s conduct. This can’t be ignored. She purposely left him suffering when it was clear that he needed help with the pain and the fever.”

Emily nodded, her expression grim. “Julie is in the office. She can do it as the head nurse.”

Dr. Parker found Julie in her office, reviewing some charts. He knocked softly on the door before entering, his expression serious. Julie looked up, immediately sensing something was wrong.

"Dr. Parker, is everything alright?" she asked, setting aside the charts.

"We need to talk about Gemma," Dr. Parker said, his tone grave. "Her behavior towards Jess Mariano has been completely unacceptable."

Julie’s brow furrowed in concern. "What happened?"

Dr. Parker sat down across from her, taking a deep breath before he spoke. "Jess was in severe pain and had a high fever. When he called for assistance, Gemma refused to administer any medication, telling him to 'tough it out.' He was left to suffer unnecessarily."

Julie's eyes widened in shock and anger. "She refused to give him medication? That’s completely against protocol. Patients in pain must be treated with compassion and care, especially someone like Jess who's going through so much."

"Exactly," Dr. Parker agreed. "When I found him, he was in a terrible state, struggling to cope with the pain. I had to step in and administer the necessary medication myself. Gemma's actions are not just a breach of professional conduct; they're inhumane."

Julie nodded, her expression hardening. "This is unacceptable. We can't have someone like that caring for our patients. I'll initiate a formal review of her conduct immediately. This isn't the first complaint we've had about her, but it's by far the most serious."

Dr. Parker leaned forward, his voice earnest. "We need to ensure that our patients, especially someone as vulnerable as Jess, are treated with the utmost care and respect. His trust in us is already fragile due to his condition. We can't afford to have it shattered by one person’s negligence and callousness."

Julie sighed, rubbing her temples. "You're right. I'll handle it, Dr. Parker. I'll make sure Gemma is taken off Jess's case immediately, and we'll review all her interactions with other patients. We have to maintain the highest standard of care here, and it’s clear she’s not meeting it."

"Thank you, Julie," Dr. Parker said, relief evident in his voice. "Jess deserves better. All our patients do."

Julie nodded firmly. "They do. And we'll make sure they get it. I promise you, this will be dealt with swiftly and thoroughly."

Dr. Parker stood up, offering a small, grateful smile. "I appreciate it, Julie. Jess is already dealing with so much; he doesn't need this added stress."

"I understand," Julie replied, her expression resolute. "We'll make this right."

As Dr. Parker left her office, Julie immediately began drafting the necessary paperwork to address Gemma’s conduct. She was determined to ensure that every patient under their care received the compassion and professionalism they deserved.

Julie made her way to Jess's room later that afternoon, her footsteps soft on the linoleum floor. She gently knocked on the door before pushing it open, finding Jess lying in bed, looking pale and exhausted but somewhat more comfortable than earlier. He turned his head slightly to see who it was and offered a faint smile when he saw Julie.

"Hey, hon," she greeted softly, stepping into the room. Jess felt safe just hearing her call him hon.

"How are you feeling now?"

Jess shrugged slightly, his voice hoarse. "Better, I guess. Still pretty wiped out, though."

Julie approached his bedside, her expression filled with genuine concern. "I'm really sorry about what happened earlier. Dr. Parker told me everything, and I want you to know that what Gemma did was completely unacceptable. We're taking it very seriously."

Jess looked down at his hands, which were fidgeting with the edge of his blanket. "Thanks, Julie. I just... I don't know why she was like that. She was mean to me all morning even though I didn't do anything to her."

Julie sat down in the chair next to his bed, leaning forward slightly. "You didn't deserve that, Jess. We're here to help you, not make things harder. Gemma won't be treating you anymore. I'll be overseeing your care personally for now, and I'll make sure you're treated with the respect and kindness you deserve."

Jess nodded slowly, relief washing over his features. "Thanks."

"Of course," Julie said warmly. "If you ever feel uncomfortable or if something isn't right, you come straight to me, okay? We're here to support you through this."

Jess nodded silently, feeling a mix of relief and vulnerability. The incident with Gemma had shaken him, reminding him of his vulnerability in a place where he had hoped to find care and comfort. That had happened too many times in his life.

Julie gave his hand a reassuring pat. "Get some rest, Jess. We'll take good care of you." Julie felt a strange protectiveness over Jess. Her heart ached thinking about him suffering in the hands of Gemma.

As she stood to leave, Jess leaned back against his pillows, feeling a bit more at ease. Julie’s presence had a calming effect, and he felt reassured knowing that someone genuinely cared about his well-being.

Later that day, Lorelai and Luke were visiting Jess, like on most days. Jess was fast asleep, the remainder of his fever and earlier distress still somewhat etched on his face. They sat around his bed, watching him like he was a bag of gold and thieves were after it.

Dr. Parker came into the room and greeted the adults. ”I’m afraid a new nurse who was assigned to Jess today has been very unprofessional and downright negligent toward Jess”, he spoke out with a serious expression on his face.

”What? What happened?” Luke was starting to look furious already.

”She was making some unprofessional comments to Jess and later on she refused medicine when Jess requested it. He was in severe pain and had a high fever. I found him in a distressed state and took care of him myself.”

Luke and Lorelai looked horrified and angry at the same time. They didn’t know what to say.

”I need you to know that we are taking this very seriously. That nurse won’t be treating Jess anymore and we have filled out a report of mistreatment. I am very sorry that this has happened.”

Luke's fists clenched at his sides, his face red with fury. "This is unacceptable! How can you let someone like that work here?"

Dr. Parker nodded, trying to calm them down. "I understand your anger, Luke. We're taking this very seriously. Jess is receiving the care he needs now, and we'll ensure nothing like this happens again."

Lorelai, trying to diffuse the tension, gently touched Luke's arm. "Let's focus on Jess, Luke. He's the one who needs us right now."

Dr. Parker left to give the family privacy.

Luke took a big breath, trying to calm down. He looked at his nephew, who lay pale and asleep on the bed, looking so much younger than his eighteen years. Luke couldn’t bear the thought of someone hurting him.

He approached Jess's bedside, the anger slowly ebbing away as worry took over.

"I just can't stand the thought of him suffering like this," Luke said softly, his voice trembling with emotion. "He doesn't deserve any of this."

"I know," Lorelai replied gently. "But he's strong, Luke. He's a fighter."

They both sat down, one on each side of Jess's bed, their eyes never leaving his face. For a while, the room was silent except for the steady beep of the monitors and Jess's rhythmic breathing.

Jess stayed asleep, his breaths deep and even as the afternoon sunlight filtered through the curtains. Luke and Lorelai remained by his side, their quiet conversation punctuated by the occasional soft beep of the medical equipment.

Luke was determined to stay by Jess’s side more than ever now. He was a bit afraid to even leave the boy alone now. What if the next nurse decides Jess’s attitude is too much to deal with and they overdose him on drugs? Luke's logical side was saying that it was nonsense, and he had seen how nurses like Julie and Emily took care of Jess with such gentleness.

Lorelai reached over the bed and Luke took her hand in his. They locked eyes and although they didn’t say anything, the silent support was there. They were there for each other, and they were there for the young boy. Ordeals like this made the journey harder but it sure as hell wouldn’t beat them. Nothing was stronger than their love for each other.

Chapter Text

The second Rory got home from her father’s house, she threw her suitcase in her room and got in her car to drive to Hartford. Being with Jess had been the only thing on her mind for the past two weeks that she was away. She was beating herself up for not being there with him and even though they called every day, it wasn’t the same. She couldn’t hold his hand or play with his hair through the phone.

Jess was asleep when she walked into the room.  He was lying on his side with a pillow clutched to his chest. His face looked peaceful, but there were dark circles under his eyes and a paleness to his skin that hadn't been there before. Rory could tell the disease was starting to take its toll already.

She sat quietly by Jess's bedside, her hand gently brushing his hair away from his forehead. She watched him sleep, how his mouth hung open just a little, and how his hand was pressed against his cheek. His black hair fell on his eyes and his blanket was pushed to the side. His shirt had ridden up, exposing his skin to the cool air-conditioned hospital room. The room was quiet except for the soft hum of medical equipment and the occasional distant chatter from the hallway.

Rory traced the outline of Jess's closed fist with her fingers, feeling a pang of sadness at the sight of his vulnerability. She felt deeply saddened that they were stuck spending time at the hospital again. She had hoped so hard that they would never have to return to this. She had hoped that Jess would never have to go through all the pain and discomfort of chemo again. But here they were and no amount of hoping and praying would change that.

As she sat there, memories of the last time Jess was in the hospital flooded her mind. The endless hours spent in Jess’s hospital room, the uncertainty and fear, the countless times she had to hold back tears just to be strong for him. She had seen him at his worst, and now here they were again, fighting the same battle. It was overwhelming to her and she didn’t even dare to imagine how awful Jess felt about it.

After a few moments, Jess stirred slightly, his eyelids fluttering open. He blinked a few times before focusing on Rory sitting beside him. A smile tugged at the corners of his lips. Finally. He had wanted nothing more but to have his girlfriend with him. For a brief moment, Jess had wondered if it was all too much for Rory and that she would leave him. But those thoughts had disappeared when he remembered it was Rory. She would never do that to him. And now here she was, with him, ready to support him in conquering cancer.

“Hey sleepy head”, she said and pecked his cheek lovingly. “I missed you so bad.” She wasn’t lying. She had missed everything about him. She missed his smile, his smell, the way his gaze wandered around the room when he talked, how he touched her, the way his skin got goosebumps when she touched him. The list was endless. And now she finally had him again, her Jess.

Jess's smile widened at Rory's gentle peck on his cheek. He reached up to hold her hand that was still resting on his hair, intertwining their fingers. He was the happiest man at that moment, despite lying on a hospital bed. But it was all Rory. She just had that effect on him.

"Hey yourself," he replied softly, his voice still raspy from sleep. "I missed you too, Rory."

Jess closed his eyes, the warmth of her touch and the sound of her voice bringing him comfort. "I’m glad you’re here," he whispered. If he was being honest, the two weeks he had spent in the hospital without Rory were one of his toughest days of treatment. The days felt endless without her by his side. And even though Luke and Lorelai visited him often, they didn’t provide him with the same comfort Rory did.

Rory kissed his forehead softly, her eyes glistening a bit. "I love you, Jess. More than anything."

"I love you too, Rory," Jess replied, his voice filled with emotion. For a moment, they stayed like that, holding each other close, finding solace in each other’s presence. The hospital room, with its harsh lights and sterile smells, faded away, leaving just the two of them.

Rory leaned closer, her eyes filled with concern as she studied his face. "How are you feeling now?"

Jess sighed, shifting slightly against his pillows. "Tired, mostly. The usual stuff." He wasn’t lying, but he also didn’t tell her the extent of things. He wanted to spare her the gory details for now.

Rory nodded understandingly, her thumb tracing soothing circles on the back of Jess's hand. "I'm sorry I couldn't be here sooner. How's everything been?"

Jess glanced around the room briefly, as if assessing the state of things. "It's been okay. Hospital life, you know." He decided not to tell her about Gemma. There was no need to upset her when there was nothing that she could do about the situation anymore.

Rory nodded again, her expression a mix of relief and worry. "I'm here now, Jess. And I'm not leaving again."

Jess squeezed her hand gently, grateful for her presence. "I know. Thanks.”

Jess felt a wave of relief wash over him as he held Rory’s hand. Her presence was like a balm, soothing the aches and fears that had been gnawing at him since his diagnosis. Despite the tiredness that clung to him, just having Rory by his side made everything feel a little more bearable.

Rory settled beside him on the bed, careful not to disturb the wires and tubes that were connected to Jess. She reached up to gently brush a stray lock of hair from his forehead, her touch light and tender. "You don’t have to go through this alone, you know," she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. "I’m here, and I’m staying as long as you need me."

Jess’s eyes softened as he looked at her, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "I know. And I’m glad. I don’t think I could do this without you."

Rory leaned in, pressing her lips to his in a soft, lingering kiss. "You’re not going to have to. We’re in this together."

The weight of those words settled over Jess like a comforting blanket. He had spent so much time trying to be strong, trying to keep it all together, that he sometimes forgot he didn’t have to carry it all alone. Rory was his anchor, and he felt a swell of gratitude for her in that moment—gratitude for her unwavering support, her love, and the way she made him feel like he could face anything, as long as she was there.

"I’ve been thinking about you every day," Jess admitted quietly, his voice almost a whisper. "Every single day. It’s what’s been getting me through this."

Rory’s eyes shimmered with unshed tears, but she blinked them away, refusing to let them fall. "I think about you too, all the time. I wish I could just make everything better for you."

"You already do, Rory," Jess replied, squeezing her hand again. "You already do."

They stayed like that for a while, just holding each other, the steady beep of the heart monitor and the soft hum of the hospital machinery fading into the background. It was as if, in that moment, nothing else mattered but the two of them. Rory’s presence was all that Jess needed to feel like he could keep fighting, no matter how tough things got.

Finally, Rory pulled back slightly, studying his face with a determined expression. "So, what’s the plan for today? Any tests or treatments coming up?"

Jess shook his head, feeling a bit more relaxed. "Nothing major. Just some routine stuff, I think. But honestly, I’m just glad to have a break from all of it for a little while."

Rory smiled, the corners of her eyes crinkling in that way Jess loved so much. "Good. I get to have you all to myself then.”

They sat in comfortable silence for a while, the only sound filling the room was the soft beeping of medical equipment. Rory continued to stroke Jess's hair gently, providing him with the comfort she knew he needed.

“Have mom and Luke been annoying you much?” Rory asked him with a light smile.

Jess chuckled. “Only slightly. I think Lorelai has been holding back her usual banter a lot. She’s been surprisingly calm when she’s visited. And Luke’s been just his usual self.”

“I’m glad mom hasn’t overwhelmed you. She can be a lot sometimes.”

“No, they’ve been great honestly. They’ve brought me food and entertainment and they’ve tried to cheer me up.”

“Well, that’s a difficult job. Trying to cheer up Jess Mariano, the king of gloom”, Rory teased him.

“Hey, I’ve gotten over my teenage angst, at least mostly.”

“You keep telling yourself that.”

Jess turned his head to look at Rory with a playful glint in his eyes. "So, tell me everything I've missed while you were away. Any exciting news?"

Rory chuckled softly, her eyes sparkling with affection. "Oh, you have no idea," she teased, settling in to catch him up on all that had happened during her time away.

She talked to him about her father and her baby sister. And Jess listened with a soft smile. She was so cute when she talked about stuff that was important to her.

Jess felt more at peace with Rory there with him. He felt like a burden was lifted off his shoulders. Rory understood him more than anyone else did and he knew she would do anything for him and vice versa.

After catching up with each other, Jess and Rory decided to take Jess's daily walk down the corridors. Jess insisted on going without assistance, his determination masking the strain his body was under. Rory stayed close, her eyes never leaving him, ready to step in if he needed help.

"Come on, I got this," Jess said, his voice a mixture of stubbornness and reassurance.

"I know you do," Rory replied, though her concern was evident. "Just take it easy, okay?"

They walked slowly, Jess's steps careful and deliberate. He gripped the IV pole with one hand, using it for support, while his other hand occasionally brushed the wall. Rory walked beside him, matching his pace, her worry growing with each unsteady step he took.

About halfway down the corridor, Jess's face began to pale, and his breathing grew labored. Rory could see the strain in his eyes and the sweat forming on his forehead.

"Jess, maybe we should go back," Rory suggested gently, reaching out a hand.

"I can do it," Jess insisted, a stubborn edge to his voice. But as he took another step, his legs buckled, and he stumbled forward.

"Jess!" Rory cried, reaching for him, but she was too late. Jess fell, his head striking the edge of a small table against the wall with a sickening thud.

Panic surged through Rory as she dropped to her knees beside him. "Jess, oh my God, are you okay?" she asked frantically, her hands hovering over him, afraid to touch him and make it worse.

Jess groaned, a hand coming up to touch his forehead. "I... I'm fine," he muttered, though the pain in his voice was unmistakable. He felt his fingers getting wet and he knew he fucked up.

Rory quickly assessed the situation. A cut had formed on his forehead, and blood was beginning to trickle down the side of his face. "You're bleeding," she said, her voice trembling. "We need to get you back to your room."

Rory gently helped Jess sit up, her heart pounding in her chest. She glanced around, hoping to spot a nurse or a doctor. To her relief, Emily had heard the commotion and she emerged from one of the rooms to check what was going on in the corridor.

"What happened?" Emily asked, concern etched on her face as she knelt beside them.

"He fell and hit his head," Rory explained, her voice shaking. "Please, help him."

Emily quickly assessed Jess's condition. He was shaking slightly from the strain of walking and blood was starting to trickle down his face. She helped him back on his feet, putting a supporting hand on his back as he struggled to stand up. "Let's get you back to your room and clean that up," she said gently. “Can you walk?” she asked.

Jess nodded slightly but leaned more into her for support. Rory and Emily supported Jess as they slowly made their way back to his room. Once inside, Emily helped Jess onto the bed and began cleaning the wound on his forehead. She wiped the wound with a wet cloth and Jess hissed at the touch. Rory wiped his hands to clean the blood off them. She held his hand as Emily assessed the wound, eyeing Jess with concern.

"Jess, this cut is deeper than I thought. We need to get you stitches," Emily said, her voice firm but gentle.

Jess groaned, leaning back against the pillow. "Great," he muttered, the pain making him more irritable.

Rory squeezed his hand tighter, worry etched on her face. "It'll be okay, Jess. You need this taken care of."

Emily called for additional help, and soon, another nurse arrived with a suture kit. They prepared Jess for the procedure, sterilizing the area around the cut and ensuring he was comfortable.

"Alright, Jess, this might sting a bit," Emily warned as she began to administer a local anesthetic to numb the area.

Jess winced but didn't make a sound. Rory sat by his side, holding his hand, trying to offer him some comfort.

As Emily started stitching the wound, Jess tried to focus on anything but the pain. He held Rory’s hand tight, gripping it tighter whenever he felt the needle pierce his skin.

"You're doing great, Jess," Emily said as she carefully stitched the wound. "Just a few more, and we'll be done."

Jess nodded, his jaw clenched tightly. He kept his eyes on Rory, finding solace in her concerned gaze.

Finally, Emily finished the last stitch and gently applied a bandage over the wound. "All done," she said, giving Jess a reassuring smile. "We'll keep an eye on it and make sure it heals properly."

Jess let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding. "Thanks," he muttered, his voice strained but grateful.

After the stitches were done, Emily stayed by Jess's side, her expression shifting from one of calm professionalism to genuine concern. She gently touched his shoulder, drawing his attention.

"Jess, I need to check you for any signs of a concussion," she said, her voice soft but firm. "You took quite a hit to the head."

Jess opened his eyes slowly, nodding. "Okay," he mumbled, trying to focus on her.

Emily began her assessment, shining a small flashlight into his eyes to check his pupil response. "Follow the light with your eyes, Jess," she instructed, watching closely as he did so. His pupils reacted normally, but she continued her thorough examination.

"How are you feeling? Any dizziness, nausea, or blurred vision?" she asked, her eyes never leaving his.

Jess thought for a moment. "A bit dizzy, but no nausea or blurred vision," he answered, his voice still weak.

Emily nodded, making a note in his chart. She gently felt around the area of the cut, checking for any additional swelling or tenderness. "Does this hurt more than before?" she asked, pressing lightly.

Jess winced slightly but shook his head. "Not really. It's just sore."

Rory watched anxiously, her grip on Jess's hand tightening. "Is he going to be okay?" she asked, her voice trembling with worry.

Emily gave Rory a reassuring smile. "He seems to be doing alright, but we need to monitor him closely for the next 24 hours. If you notice any changes, like increased drowsiness, confusion, or vomiting, let us know immediately."

Jess sighed, feeling the weight of the situation. "Great, another thing to worry about," he muttered, closing his eyes.

Rory leaned in closer, her hand gently brushing his cheek. "Hey, we'll get through this," she whispered. "Just rest now, okay?"

Emily finished her examination, satisfied with the initial results. "You're in good hands, Jess. Try to get some sleep, and we'll keep a close eye on you."

As Emily left the room, Rory stayed by Jess's side, her fingers gently combing through his hair. Jess's breathing began to steady, the comfort of Rory's presence helping to ease his mind.

"I'll be right here," she whispered, leaning in to kiss his forehead, avoiding the bandaged area. "You're not alone, Jess."

Jess felt like such a burden. It was Rory’s first day back and of course, he had to cause her extra stress, as if she wasn’t already worried enough about his condition to begin with. His stubbornness led to him being hurt and when he was hurt, Rory was on edge.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t catch you”, she said quietly, breaking the silence in the room.

Jess stirred from his thoughts hearing this. “Hey, it’s not your fault. I was the one refusing your help. I was the clumsy ass that fell”, Jess said, stroking his thumb over Rory’s. They locked eyes, both of them conveying support in their gaze.

“But I was supposed to be looking out for you.”

“And I was supposed to let you help if I needed it. But I didn’t”, Jess spoke, not breaking the eye contact. “It was my fault. Stop blaming yourself, Rory.”

After a while, Emily returned to Jess's room, carrying a small yellow bracelet labeled "Fall Risk." She approached Jess with an apologetic expression, holding up the bracelet.

"I'm really sorry, Jess," she began, her voice gentle. "But after your fall, we have to follow protocol. This is just to ensure everyone's aware and can keep an extra eye on you."

Jess sighed, glancing at the bracelet with a mix of frustration and embarrassment. "Unbelievable," he muttered, reluctantly holding out his wrist.

Emily fastened the bracelet around his wrist with care, her touch light. "I know it's not ideal, but it's for your safety. We just want to make sure you're okay."

Rory, standing by Jess's side, bit her lip to keep from teasing him. She could see how embarrassed he was and didn't want to make things worse. Instead, she reached out and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Hey, it's no big deal," she said softly, trying to keep her tone light. "It's just a precaution. Besides, it's kinda like a badge of honor. Shows you're tough enough to need extra protection."

Jess managed a small smile, though his cheeks were still flushed with embarrassment. "Yeah, right," he replied, trying to play along. "Just what I always wanted."

Emily finished securing the bracelet and gave Jess a sympathetic look. "If you need anything or if you're feeling unsteady at all, just press the call button, okay? We're here to help."

Jess nodded, appreciating her concern despite his discomfort. "Thanks, Emily."

As Emily left the room, Rory leaned in closer to Jess. "Seriously though, don't let it get to you," she said softly. "You're doing great, and this is just a bump in the road. We'll get through it together."

Jess looked into her eyes, finding comfort in her unwavering support. "Thanks, Rory," he murmured, squeezing her hand. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

Rory smiled warmly, brushing a strand of hair from his forehead. "You don't have to find out. I'm here for you, always."

Rory’s phone buzzed and she dug it out of her pocket. “Mom texted. She and Luke are on their way here.”

“Why? Did you tell them?” he asked, eyeing his girlfriend suspiciously. Well, of course, she did. Rory told her mom everything that happened in her life.

“I had to. You scared me”, she said apologetically. “I’ll make it up to you,” she continued and kissed him on the lips. She wanted someone else to know about Jess’s fall too, because they always said there was no playing around when it came to head injuries. And even when he didn’t seem to have a concussion, she figured Luke would want to know.

“They’ll make fun of me”, Jess sighed grumpily.

Rory had to hide her smile from him. She knew it would be just as hard for Lorelai to contain herself after she’d seen the fall risk bracelet on the boy. But she had to be supportive and empathetic toward Jess. “No, they won’t. You know they’re just worried”, she tried to convince him with little luck.

Not long after, the door swung open and Luke and Lorelai walked in. Lorelai's eyes immediately fell on the yellow bracelet on Jess's wrist. She bit her lip, trying to suppress the grin that threatened to spread across her face.

"Hey, how's our favorite patient?" Lorelai asked, her voice teasing but warm.

"Could be better," Jess muttered, not meeting her eyes.

Luke, less subtle, took a look at the bracelet and raised an eyebrow. "Fall risk, huh? What, you forget how to walk?"

Jess groaned, covering his face with his hands. "Thanks, Uncle Luke. Just what I needed."

Lorelai sat down on the edge of the bed, her eyes twinkling with amusement. "Come on, Jess. It’s not that bad. It's like a VIP bracelet. You get special treatment."

"Yeah, right," Jess muttered, rolling his eyes. "Special treatment because I'm a klutz."

Rory reached out and squeezed his hand, giving him a reassuring smile. "It's just temporary, Jess. And besides, it's kind of adorable."

"Adorable?" Jess scoffed, but he couldn't help the small smile that tugged at his lips.

Luke leaned against the wall, his expression softening. "Look, Jess. We just want you to be safe. No one here thinks less of you for needing a little extra help."

Lorelai nodded, patting his leg. "Exactly. And you know, if you ever want to start a fall risk club, I'll be your first member. I'm practically a professional at tripping over nothing."

“I’ve seen her falling so much I don’t even pat an eye when she falls anymore”, Rory laughed. “It’s a surprise you’ve never gotten stitches before”, she continued.

“Oh, it certainly is. A small miracle that is. And, for the record, that bracelet is totally a fashion statement. I mean, yellow is the new black, right?"

Jess couldn't help but chuckle at the banter, but his pride was still a bit bruised. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up," he muttered, though the corners of his mouth twitched upward.

Luke, sensing Jess's frustration, stepped forward and placed a hand on his nephew's shoulder. "Hey, Jess. I know it sucks feeling like you can't do things on your own. But we're here to help you, not to make fun of you."

Jess didn’t feel like talking about his inner frustrations in front of everybody. He didn’t feel like revealing that he hated feeling like a failure and even the smallest mistakes made him feel like it. He didn’t want to tell them how it probably came from his childhood and his desire to be liked by somebody and he felt like if he made a mistake, everyone would see him for what he truly was and abandon him. He beat himself up for every mistake and told himself that his mom hadn’t come home for three days straight because he had broken a glass. He told himself that the kids didn’t want to play with him during recess because he wasn’t good enough, wasn’t cool enough, wasn’t worth their time. It was because he had broken and dirty clothes but it was his own fault for not figuring out how the washing machines worked even though they didn’t even have any laundry detergent. These deep-seated fears gnawed at him constantly, making every stumble, every fall, feel like a confirmation of his worst insecurities.

Jess kept his eyes on his hands, fidgeting with the edges of his blanket, trying to push away the memories and the anxiety they brought with them. He forced a smile, looking up at Rory, Lorelai, and Luke.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine”, he told them, but he wasn’t too sure he believed it himself. He hated making mistakes so much. Often, he just refused to admit them. But this one was hard to dodge. It had been his own fault to fall. And even though he kept telling himself it wasn’t a big deal, he didn’t believe it. It was always a big deal. No matter who told him and how often, he’d never believe it.

Rory clung to his arm, seeing that the lighthearted teasing hadn’t lightened Jess’s mood at all. She looked at him with worried eyes and Jess avoided eye contact as hard as he could.

Jess shifted uncomfortably under Rory's concerned gaze, his fingers absently tracing the pattern on his blanket. He knew she could see right through his facade, that she understood the weight he carried with each misstep, each stumble. He wanted to reassure her, to make light of the situation as he often did, but this time, the heaviness in his chest wouldn't let him.

"It's just a stupid bracelet," he muttered finally, his voice betraying his attempt at nonchalance. "I'll get rid of it as soon as they let me." He said it more to himself, trying to convince himself that he wasn’t upset.

Rory squeezed his hand gently, sensing his underlying frustration. "I know it feels like a nuisance now, but it's just to keep you safe," she reassured him.

Luke nodded, placing a reassuring hand on Jess's shoulder. "You'll be back to normal before you know it. Just take it easy for now."

Jess nodded, though the knot of disappointment in his stomach refused to loosen. He hated feeling like a burden, like he couldn't even walk down a hallway without causing trouble. Deep down, he knew his family cared and didn't see him as weak, but it was hard not to feel that way in moments like this.

Chapter Text

Jess had started his second round of chemo. The side effects hadn’t caught up to him yet, so he was feeling fairly well considering the circumstances. He wasn’t holding his breath though, he knew his condition could deteriorate at any given moment.

Rory had stayed with him for a few days, but she had to go home eventually. He was alone in the hospital room, the soft hum of the medical equipment his only company. That changed soon as the door creaked open and Dr. Parker walked in, his expression calm and reassuring as always.

"Hey, Jess," Dr. Parker greeted, pulling up a chair next to his bed. "How are you feeling?"

Jess shrugged, trying to muster a semblance of nonchalance. "I'm okay, I guess.”

Dr. Parker nodded understandingly. "That’s good. I wanted to talk to you about your treatment plan going forward."

Jess looked up, his interest piqued. "What about it?"

"You handled the first round of chemo quite well, which is a positive sign," Dr. Parker began, his tone both encouraging and serious. "Because of that, we're going to increase your dose for this round. The idea is to hit the cancer cells harder and improve your chances of a full remission."

Jess's stomach tightened at the news More chemo meant more pain. "So... does that mean the side effects will be worse?"

"Potentially, yes," Dr. Parker admitted. "But we'll be monitoring you very closely, and there are medications we can give you to help manage those side effects. The whole team thinks this will be for your benefit, we wouldn’t do this otherwise.

Jess took a deep breath, absorbing the information. He wasn’t thrilled about feeling sicker, but he liked the part about reaching remission. "Okay. I'll do my best."

"I know you will, Jess," Dr. Parker said with a reassuring smile. "And remember, it's okay to feel scared or anxious. You're going through something incredibly tough, but you have a lot of people who care about you and are here to support you."

"Thanks, Dr. Parker," Jess replied, feeling a mix of apprehension and determination. "I appreciate it."

Dr. Parker stood up, giving Jess a firm but gentle pat on the shoulder. "Hang in there, Jess. You are closer to the finish line every day.”

As Dr. Parker left the room, Jess lay back against his pillows, staring at the ceiling. The increased dose of chemo loomed over him like a dark cloud, but he resolved to face it head-on. Jess tried to get comfortable on his bed and focus on reading, but he could barely finish a paragraph before his thoughts would wonder back to his treatment. It was like his mind was glued to that and he couldn’t distract himself from it.

Just then, he heard a knock on the door. He expected to see a nurse step in, so he was surprised when Anna and Grace came in. “Hi Jess. I wanted to come see you”, Anna said excitedly.

“Hi Anna. Come in by all means. I need the distraction.”

Grace sat on the chair next to Jess’s bed and took Anna to sit on her lap. Jess sat up in his bed and crossed his legs.

Anna's eyes wandered around the room, taking in the various medical equipment. Her gaze finally settled on the chemo bag attached to Jess's IV stand. She tilted her head, curiosity evident in her expression.

"Jess, are you getting your magic medicine now?" she asked, using the childlike term she had adopted for chemotherapy.

Jess glanced at the chemo bag and then back at Anna, nodding with a small smile. "Yeah, Anna, I am. The magic medicine is working hard to help me get better."

Anna's eyes widened with understanding. "Does it make you feel all yucky inside too?"

Jess chuckled softly, appreciating her honesty. "Sometimes, yeah. But it's also helping to make me better, just like it helps you."

Anna nodded solemnly. "You're really brave, Jess. I hope the magic medicine works really fast for you."

"Thanks, Anna," Jess said, feeling a warmth spread through him at her sincere words. "I hope it works fast for both of us."

Grace smiled softly and stroked her daughter’s beanie-covered head. She thought Jess’s and Anna’s little friendship was sweet and she could tell how much her daughter admired Jess. He was like her wise older brother.

“How come you have all of your hair? Mine fell out cuz of the magic medicine”, Anna asked with confusion written all over her face.

Jess smiled at her child-like innocence. “That’s a good question, Anna. You see, I have something called a gene mutation. It's like a special little change in my body that makes my hair stay even when I get the magic medicine.”

Anna's eyes widened with curiosity. “So, you’re like a superhero? With special powers?”

Jess chuckled softly. “I wish it was something that cool. But it’s more like a mix of good and bad. I get to keep my hair, but the magic medicine makes me feel even yuckier inside because of the mutation.”

Anna furrowed her brow, trying to understand. “So, you feel more yucky than me?”

“Sometimes, yeah,” Jess admitted. “But we all have our own challenges with it. It's different for everyone. We just have to be brave and strong and take it one day at a time.”

Anna nodded thoughtfully. “I think you’re really brave, Jess. Even if you don’t have a superhero cape.”

Jess grinned. “Thanks, Anna. You’re really brave too. And you know what? We’re both fighting our own battles, and that makes us pretty awesome.”

“Thank you for being so sweet to Anna,” Grace said, smiling at Jess. “She talks about you all the time. You’ve become quite the hero in her eyes.”

Jess shifted a bit, feeling a mix of pride and awkwardness. No one had ever admired him before in the way Anna did. It was all new to him. “She’s a great kid. It’s nice to have someone to talk to who doesn’t treat me like I’m fragile. Plus, she’s got a way of making the day a little brighter.”

Grace nodded, her expression softening. “It’s been hard for her to understand everything that’s going on. Seeing someone like you, handling it with such strength, gives her a lot of comfort.”

Jess gave a small, rueful smile. “Sometimes it doesn’t feel like I’m handling it all that well. But we do what we have to, right?”

“Right,” Grace agreed. “And it’s okay to have those moments where it feels overwhelming. You’re allowed to have bad days.”

Jess looked down, his fingers fidgeting with the edge of his blanket. “Thanks. It’s just... sometimes it feels like I have to keep it all together for everyone else. Like I can’t show how scared I am.” Jess wasn’t really sure why he was telling Grace all this. Maybe because he thought she would understand. But on the other hand, she was dealing with a lot with her young daughter being sick. Jess didn’t want to add to the burden.

Grace reached out, placing a gentle hand on his arm. “You don’t have to be a superhero all the time, Jess. It’s okay to lean on others, to let them in. We’re all here for each other.”

Anna looked up at Jess with wide eyes, sensing the seriousness of the conversation but not fully understanding it. “Are you okay, Jess?”

Jess smiled at her. “Yeah, Anna. I’m okay. Just talking about some grown-up stuff.”

Grace gave his arm a reassuring squeeze. “And remember, you’re not alone in this. If you ever need to talk or need anything at all, we’re here. Sometimes, just knowing someone is there can make all the difference.”

Jess nodded, feeling a bit of the weight lift off his shoulders. “Thanks, Grace. That means a lot. Really.”

“Anytime,” she said softly. “We’re all in this together.”

As the conversation continued, Jess began to feel a wave of fatigue wash over him. His body ached, and a dull headache was starting to form. He tried to hide it, not wanting to worry Anna or Grace, but Grace's sharp eyes noticed the change in his demeanor. Maybe Jess wasn’t that subtle after all, rubbing his temples and eyes and yawning constantly. He also had a weird feeling of weight pressing on his chest. He kept rubbing his knuckles over the spot but nothing changed.

"Jess, you look a bit pale," Grace said gently. "Are you feeling okay?"

Jess forced a smile, not wanting to seem weak, even though they had just had a conversation about not needing to appear strong all the time. It was easier said than done for Jess. "I'm alright, just a little tired."

Grace nodded, understanding. "I think it's time we let Jess get some rest, Anna. He's had a long day and needs to take it easy."

Anna's face fell slightly, but she nodded obediently. "Okay, mom." She turned to Jess, her eyes full of concern. "Feel better soon, Jess."

"Thanks, Anna," Jess replied, his voice soft. "I'll see you around, okay?"

Anna smiled and gave him a small wave as she slipped off her mom's lap. Grace stood up, smoothing Anna's beanie. "We'll check on you later, Jess. Take care of yourself."

"Will do," Jess said, giving them a grateful nod.

As the door closed behind them, Jess let out a deep sigh, the exhaustion hitting him full force. He leaned back against his pillows, grateful for the brief distraction Anna and Grace had provided but also thankful for the quiet that now enveloped the room. He closed his eyes, hoping that some rest would help ease the discomfort.

Jess fell into a restless slumber but after what felt like mere minutes, he woke up to someone unbuttoning his shirt and a cold metal touching his chest. Jess rubbed his eyes and tried to get the blurriness to disappear.

When he finally could focus his eyes, he saw that it was Julie, who so rudely had woken him up. She placed the stethoscope on his chest, listening intently while the heart monitor beeped softly in the background. Jess, still groggy from sleep, tried to stay calm despite the unease creeping into his mind.

"Your heart rhythm seems irregular," Julie murmured, more to herself than to Jess, as she concentrated on the readings. "I'm going to call Dr. Parker to come and take a look, just to be sure."

Jess nodded slowly, the seriousness in Julie's voice heightening his concern. Suddenly, he was hyper-aware of his surroundings. He glanced at the monitors, their blinking lights and digital displays a reminder of his vulnerable state. He hadn't expected this complication, not after feeling relatively stable earlier.

After a few minutes that felt like hours, Dr. Parker arrived with a concerned expression. He reviewed the monitors and listened to Jess's heart himself, his brow furrowing slightly at the irregularities in the rhythm. He was not only worried for Jess’s physical state but also his mental wellbeing. It was bad enough that the kid was battling cancer but now this. It was a lot to take in.

"We need to run some tests to understand what's causing this," Dr. Parker said calmly, though his eyes conveyed the seriousness of the situation. "Julie, prepare for an ECG and notify the cardiology team."

Jess's anxiety rose with each passing moment, but he trusted Dr. Parker's expertise. He glanced at Julie, who gave him a reassuring smile before bustling out of the room to organize the necessary tests.

“What’s going on?” Jess asked with a shaky voice. He was trying to read Dr. Parker’s expression, but the man had an unreadable professional look on his face.

“Your heart monitor was beeping, and it seems like there are some abnormalities in your heart. We can’t know what is causing this without proper testing, but I’ll tell you more as soon as we find out”, he explained.

Jess couldn’t hide his anxiety any longer as he tried to process the information given to him. “Something’s wrong with my heart?” he asked with an uncertain voice.

Dr. Parker nodded. “You have an irregular heartbeat that indicates that everything’s not in order. It’s not necessarily anything serious but you do understand that we cannot take any chances when it comes to the heart”, he explained with less professionalism and more compassion.

“I’m going to call your uncle and inform him of the situation. We’ll get you tested as soon as possible”, Dr. Parker continued. He left the room swiftly, rushing to do his duty to ensure that Jess would be getting the best possible care.

Jess still wasn’t processing the information well. One moment he was sleeping, dreaming of swimming in the ocean with dolphins and the next he was being told that something was wrong with his heart. He was left wishing that he wouldn’t be alone, but it would still take a while for Luke to get there, so he was left to deal on his own until then.

There was a storm inside of his head, voices screaming that his heart was damaged, and he’d die in a matter of minutes and other voices saying that if cancer wasn’t enough to make Luke and Rory to give up on him, this would push them over the edge. Jess was too broken of a person to fix, inside and out. Jess curled into himself, desperate for the voices to quiet down before he broke down in tears.

Julie returned to take him to do the ECG, but she stopped on her track as she saw Jess looking so scared and defeated on the bed. She walked over and gently laid an arm on his bare shoulder. “Hey hon, it’ll be okay. You’re gonna be just fine. We’ll fix you right up once we know what’s wrong. And your uncle and girlfriend are on the way. You don’t have to do this on your own”, she comforted him.

Jess bit his lip and nodded. No words could leave his closed throat at the moment. Julie pushed a wheelchair closer to his bed. “They’re ready for your ECG now. If you could hop here and I’ll take you there”, she said softly.

With a bit of Julie’s help, Jess managed to get himself off the bed and onto the wheelchair. He was breathing heavily once he was there. “You okay, hon?” she asked him and put her hand on his shoulder. Jess nodded slightly but he and Julie both knew he was lying. He was terrified. Julie draped a blanket on his shoulder, and they were on their way.

Julie pushed him and his IV pole down the corridor and into the elevator. They got off at floor 6, the cardiology floor. Jess had never been there before, but he was too busy trying to not have a panic attack to take in the scenery much.  Julie kept talking to him the entire way there and it was a welcome distraction for him.

She wheeled Jess into the ECG room, where the sterile environment and hum of medical equipment immediately intensified his anxiety. The room was brightly lit, with various monitors and machines surrounding a large exam table in the center. The faint, cold smell of antiseptic hung in the air, a reminder of the many patients who had been there before him.

“Hi Jess, I’m Karen,” said the nurse waiting for him, her warm smile doing little to ease his nerves. “We’re going to take good care of you today.”

Julie helped Jess transfer from the wheelchair to the exam table. The effort left him breathing heavily, each inhale feeling labored. He lay back, the thin paper sheet crinkling beneath him. It stuck to his naked back and Jess noticed he was sweating despite it being freezing in the room.

Karen moved with practiced efficiency, preparing the equipment while Julie stayed close to Jess, her presence a small comfort. “We’re just going to place these electrodes on your chest, arms, and legs. It might feel a little cold, but it won't hurt,” Karen explained, holding up one of the small, circular electrodes.

Jess nodded, swallowing hard. He flinched slightly as Karen applied the first electrode to his chest, the gel feeling icy against his skin. She continued placing the electrodes methodically, her hands gentle but sure. The sensation of the cold gel and the sticky pads adhering to his skin heightened his awareness of every beat of his heart.

Julie leaned in, giving Jess a reassuring smile. “You’re doing great, Jess. Just keep breathing, okay?”

The room seemed to grow quieter as Karen connected the electrodes to the ECG machine, the soft beeping of the monitors filling the silence. Jess focused on the ceiling, trying to regulate his breathing. His heart pounded, each beat feeling louder than the last. He tried to remind himself that this was just a test, that he was in good hands, but the fear of the unknown loomed large.

Karen started the machine, and the beeping quickened, mirroring Jess’s racing heart. “Just relax, Jess. It’ll be over in a few minutes,” she said gently, her eyes meeting his in a brief, reassuring glance.

Jess lay still, his body tense, feeling every sensation acutely. The electrodes tugged slightly at his skin, the cold gel sending occasional shivers through him. His mind raced with thoughts of what the results might show, the possibility of something being seriously wrong gnawing at him. He didn’t think he could manage a heart problem on top of leukemia. That was too much to ask for, right? No one could handle that much.

Karen watched the screen intently, her professional demeanor masking any immediate reactions to the readings. She made a few adjustments, her fingers deftly moving over the controls. Julie kept talking softly to Jess, her voice a soothing background noise that helped keep his anxiety at bay.

After what felt like an eternity, the machine beeped, signaling the end of the recording. Karen began removing the electrodes, and her touch was as gentle as when she had applied them. “All done, Jess. You did great,” she said, offering him a reassuring smile.

Jess managed a weak smile in return, though his body remained tense. Julie helped him sit up slowly, careful not to jostle him too much. “See? That wasn’t so bad, right?”

“Yeah, not too bad,” Jess muttered, though the tension in his chest belied his words.

Karen wiped the excess gel off his body and said they were good to go. Julie helped him back into the wheelchair, her touch firm yet comforting. “Let’s get you back to your room. You’ve had enough excitement for one day. Dr. Parker will come meet you there with the results shortly.”

As Julie wheeled Jess back into his room, the first thing he saw was Rory and Luke waiting anxiously by his bed. Rory immediately stood up, her eyes filled with concern, while Luke looked relieved but still tense.

"Hey," Jess greeted them, trying to muster a reassuring smile. He felt a pang of guilt for making them worry, even though he knew it wasn’t his fault. The voices inside of him were telling him it was his fault.

Rory rushed to his side, taking his hand in hers. "How are you feeling? What did they say?"

Jess shook his head slightly, his eyes betraying his unease. "I haven't heard the results yet.”

Luke stepped closer, his brow furrowed with worry. "You okay, kid? You look a bit pale."

Jess gave a small, half-hearted shrug. "Just tired, I guess. And... you know, a bit nervous."

Julie helped Jess settle back into bed, adjusting the pillows behind him. "Dr. Parker will be here soon, Jess. You did great, and it's good to see your family here to support you."

Jess nodded. Rory stayed by his side, her fingers gently tracing circles on his hand. "We're here for you, no matter what," she whispered, her voice steady despite the anxiety she felt. Jess hoped she wasn’t lying. He knew deep down that Rory would never lie to him about something like this and that the voices in his head were just trying to get to him. Still, he found himself believing them sometimes.

Luke pulled up a chair and sat down next to the bed, his presence solid and reassuring. "Whatever the results are, we'll deal with it together. You're not alone in this, Jess."

Jess took a deep breath, trying to calm the swirling thoughts in his mind. The fear of the unknown gnawed at him, but having Rory and Luke there made it a bit more bearable. "Thanks, guys," he said softly, his voice tinged with emotion.

Sometime later, Dr. Parker entered the room, holding a folder with Jess's test results. He gave a nod to Luke and Rory before turning his attention to Jess. "Alright, Jess. Let's talk about your ECG results."

The room fell silent, everyone holding their breath as Dr. Parker began to explain. "The results show that you have fluid around your heart, Jess. This condition is known as pericardial effusion. It's likely a side effect of the chemotherapy."

Jess's heart sank. He squeezed Rory's hand tighter, his anxiety spiking. "What does that mean? What do we have to do?"

Dr. Parker's expression was serious but calm. "It means we need to drain the fluid to prevent any complications. We'll perform a procedure called pericardiocentesis. It's a bit intimidating, but it's a common procedure, and we'll take every precaution to ensure it goes smoothly."

Rory's eyes widened with concern, but she kept her voice steady. "Is it dangerous?"

Dr. Parker shook his head slightly. "There are risks, as with any procedure, but it's generally safe. We'll use imaging techniques to guide us and make sure we avoid any complications."

Luke stepped forward, his brow furrowed. "When will you do it?"

"We need to do it as soon as possible," Dr. Parker replied. "The fluid around Jess's heart can put pressure on it and affect its function, so it's important we address it quickly."

Jess felt a lump form in his throat. "Will it hurt?"

Dr. Parker gave him a reassuring look. "We'll use local anesthesia to numb the area, so you shouldn't feel much pain. You might feel some pressure, but we'll do our best to keep you comfortable."

Jess took a deep breath, trying to steady his nerves. It was good news after all. He didn’t have a serious heart problem, just some fluids. Dr. Parker made it sound like it was fairly simple to address. And Luke and Rory were there with him. He trusted them when they said he’d be alright. "Okay. Let's get it over with."

Dr. Parker smiled encouragingly. "That's the spirit. We'll take good care of you, Jess. I'll arrange for the procedure to be done shortly. In the meantime, just try to relax."

As Dr. Parker left the room to make the necessary arrangements, Jess lay back against the pillows, his mind racing. The thought of undergoing another procedure was daunting, but the unwavering support of Rory and Luke gave him strength. He squeezed Rory's hand, drawing comfort from her presence, and took a few deep breaths to calm his racing heart.

The minutes seemed to stretch on endlessly as they waited. Rory continued to hold Jess's hand, whispering soothing words to him, while Luke sat by the bedside, his expression a mixture of concern and determination.

Finally, Julie arrived to take Jess to the procedure room. Jess felt a surge of anxiety, but he forced himself to remain calm. He gave Rory and Luke a small, brave smile as he was wheeled out of the room. "See you guys soon."

"We'll be right here when you get back," Rory promised, her eyes shining with love and reassurance.

Luke gave Jess a firm nod. "You've got this, Jess."

Jess's heart pounded as Julie wheeled him into the procedure room, the antiseptic smell stronger here than anywhere else in the hospital. He tried to focus on Julie's calming voice as she explained the process, but his mind kept drifting to worst-case scenarios.

She helped him onto the operating table, and they covered him with a drape that only left his chest exposed. A screen was placed bellow his neck so that Jess couldn’t see the area that was being operated. He thought it was for the better. He was certain he’d pass out if he saw everything that was going on.

"Alright, Jess," Dr. Parker said as he entered the room, his presence commanding and reassuring. "We're going to start by numbing the area. You'll feel a small pinch." Jess tried to calm his shaking hands with little effect.

Jess braced himself, wincing slightly as the needle delivering the local anesthetic pricked his skin. The numbness spread quickly, and the sharp sting was replaced by a dull pressure. It felt different than when he got his port inserted. Somehow, this felt more serious.

As Dr. Parker and the team set up the ultrasound, Jess stared at the ceiling, trying to control his breathing. A million questions swam through his brain. What if something goes wrong? What if they hit the wrong spot? It was his heart they were working on, after all. Or well, around his heart, but it was still far too close for comfort. He clenched his fists, willing his body to stay still.

"Using the ultrasound now to locate the best spot," Dr. Parker narrated, more for Jess's comfort than necessity.  Jess appreciated it. Hearing the process step by step helped ground him. He felt a pressure as the needle was inserted, the sensation strange but not painful. Stay still, just stay still, he thought.

"We're almost there, Jess. Just stay still," Dr. Parker's voice cut through his swirling thoughts.

Jess focused on the sounds of the room: the beep of the heart monitor, the soft murmur of the medical team, Julie's encouraging whispers. Then, there was a different kind of pressure as the catheter was threaded in. He felt a pulling sensation inside his chest as the fluid began to drain. It was uncomfortable, but he bit his lip and endured it.

"We're removing the fluid now," Dr. Parker said. "You're doing great, Jess. Just a little longer."

Jess closed his eyes, picturing Rory’s face after the procedure. Her relieved smile, telling him how proud she was and how well Jess took it all. He just had to endure it a tiny bit longer and he’d be there.

Finally, Dr. Parker announced that they were done. The catheter was removed, and a nurse applied firm pressure to the insertion site, then bandaged it. Jess felt a wave of relief wash over him, though exhaustion quickly followed.

Julie took Jess back to his room, speaking softly to him the entire way. Her voice was a lifeline, keeping him tethered to the present and away from the dark recesses of his mind. As they approached his room, Jess noticed Rory and Luke waiting anxiously. Rory’s face lit up with relief when she saw him, and Luke gave him a nod that conveyed more support than words ever could.

“We’re back,” Julie announced as she maneuvered Jess’s wheelchair into the room. “He did great.”

Rory rushed to his side, grabbing his hand. “How are you feeling?”

“Tired,” Jess admitted, his voice weak. “But okay.”

They helped Jess back into his bed, Rory not once letting go of his hand. She stroked his hair gently as Julie was talking to Luke on the other side of the room. Jess fought to keep his eyes open. The pain in his chest was mostly gone but it was replaced by a feeling of pressure. Rory was doing a good job distracting him.

Dr. Parker followed them in shortly after, carrying a clipboard. “Jess, we managed to drain the fluid. The pressure on your heart should decrease now, which should make you feel better soon. But we’ll need to keep monitoring you closely.”

Jess nodded, too drained to say much. He felt a bit of relief but also anxiety about what might come next.

“Thank you, Dr. Parker,” Rory said, her grip on Jess’s hand tightening as she looked at the doctor.

As he lay back in the bed, Rory and Luke by his side, he let himself relax a little. He was still scared, still anxious about the fluid and the chemo and everything else but having them there made it just a bit easier to bear.

The worry in their eyes mirrored his own feelings, but their presence also brought him comfort. No matter how hard it got, he knew he wasn’t facing it alone.

Rory was playing with his hair and telling him how brave he was. Luke was on the other side, his hand touching Jess’s shoulder from time to time. Jess’s eyes began to droop as his anxiety melted away.

His eyelids grew heavier, the exhaustion from the procedure and the emotional strain finally catching up to him. He gave in to the overwhelming need for rest, knowing that when he woke up, Rory and Luke would still be there. He wasn’t alone in this fight.

The last thing he heard before sleep claimed him was Rory’s gentle voice. “We love you, Jess. We’re not going anywhere.”

With that, he slipped into a deep, dreamless sleep, comforted by the unwavering support of the people who cared about him the most.

Rory watched him with eyes full of love. “He gave us quite a scare today”, she said to Luke as she continued to stroke the sleeping boy’s hair.

“Yeah, the worst”, Luke chuckled, studying his nephew’s face.

“It’s unfair how much he has to endure. It’s all too much for one person to handle”, Rory said sadly.

Luke’s expression changed to a serious one. “I know. If I could take it all off of him, I would”, Luke said and softly squeezed Jess’s limp hand.

Rory nodded, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “I just hate seeing him like this. He’s been through so much already, and it seems like it never ends.”

Luke sighed deeply, his gaze fixed on Jess. “He’s a fighter, though. Stronger than he knows. But it doesn’t make it any easier to watch.”

”No, it doesn’t”, Rory said quietly.

They stayed with Jess until the sun went down. Rory insisted on staying with Jess, but Luke went home for the night. Jess stayed asleep the whole afternoon and night. He would groan and shift on the bed occasionally but he didn’t stir once.

Rory watched over him, her heart aching with each pained sound he made. She gently adjusted his blanket, ensuring he was comfortable, and whispered soothing words, hoping he could sense her presence even in his deep sleep.

As the night grew darker, the hospital became quieter. Rory found herself drifting in and out of a light sleep, her head resting on the edge of Jess's bed. She would wake up occasionally to check on him, her fingers gently tracing patterns on the back of his hand.

Around midnight, the door to Jess’s room creaked open, and Julie peeked in, checking on her patient. Seeing Rory still there, she walked over quietly.

"How's he doing?" Julie whispered, her eyes filled with concern.

Rory straightened up, rubbing her tired eyes. "He's been sleeping. I think the pain is keeping him restless, though."

Julie nodded, checking Jess's vitals with practiced efficiency. "He’s stable. It’s a good sign that he’s getting some rest, even if it’s not completely peaceful."

Rory sighed, her shoulders slumping with exhaustion. "I just want him to get better.”

Julie gave her a reassuring smile. "He’s in good hands. We’re keeping a close eye on him. You should try to get some rest too, Rory. You need your strength to be here for him."

Rory nodded reluctantly, knowing Julie was right. "I'll try."

As the night wore on, Rory finally drifted into a deeper sleep, her head resting on her folded arms beside Jess’s bed. She dreamed of better days, of Jess healthy and happy, away from the sterile walls of the hospital.

Chapter Text

The early morning light was filtering through the window when Jess finally stirred from his slumber. He felt a headache brewing and the light was only making it worse. He put his arm over his eyes, hoping to ease the pain. He felt someone shift on the side of the bed then a hand came to touch his thigh.

He couldn’t remember much from yesterday after the fluid draining. He remembered Luke and Rory being there, but he didn’t expect either of them to stay with him. He lifted his arm a bit to see Rory sitting next to him and smiling slightly.

“Morning sleepyhead”, she greeted him gently.

Jess tried to hide his pain from her. “Morning”, he answered and tried to muster a smile. It was easier when he saw the soft look on her face.

“You slept for a long time. How’re you feeling?”

Jess shifted on the bed, but he winced at the sudden pain that shot through his body. Rory didn’t miss it, judging by the way her smile dropped.

"I'm fine," he lied, hoping she wouldn't press further.

Rory frowned but didn’t push it. "Alright. If you need anything, just let me know, okay?" she said softly, her hand brushing his hair back gently.

Jess knew that he didn’t have to put on a brave face for Rory. But that was all he had ever known. How to fake being fine, how to hide his pain from everyone around him. Because he had learned that no one cares if you’re sad and no one cares if you’re hurt. Keep it to yourself and stop whining. Your mom won’t be there to kiss your booboos and she won’t be there to hold you when you’re ill. His stubbornness also didn’t help him to open up. He managed to do it occasionally and he had to admit that his shoulders felt lighter when he was able to not hide his feelings. But for some reason, it was still so hard for him. A leopard can't change its spots, he guessed.

Jess leaned back on the bed and tried his hardest not to let his discomfort show too much. He closed his eyes and took deep breaths. This was going to be a long day.

Emily entered the room with a gentle knock, her usual warm demeanor putting Jess at ease. "Good morning, Jess. How are we feeling today?" she asked, her voice soft and professional.

"Morning," Jess replied, forcing another smile. "I'm okay."

Emily gave him a knowing look but didn’t press further. She moved efficiently, her hands gentle but firm as she began her routine check. "I need to take a look at the spot where we drained the fluid yesterday," she explained, lifting his blue-stripped shirt to inspect the area.

Jess tensed slightly, the pain from the procedure still fresh, but he did his best to hide it. He wasn’t a fuss, after all. "Sure," he said, keeping his voice steady.

Emily carefully examined the area, her fingers prodding gently around the site. "Everything looks good so far," she noted, her eyes meeting his. "Any pain or discomfort?"

Jess hesitated for a moment before shaking his head. "No, not really." He should’ve known better than lying to medical staff. But he didn’t think it was a big deal. It was only a dull ache and the one in his head was way more severe. But she hadn’t asked and Jess wasn’t going to tell.

Emily frowned slightly, clearly not convinced, but she didn’t push him. "Alright, but if you feel anything unusual or if the pain gets worse, you need to let me know immediately."

"Will do," Jess replied, hoping his voice didn’t betray the lie.

Emily finished her check and adjusted his blankets. "You're doing great, Jess. Just keep resting and let your body heal. And try to eat some of the breakfast when it comes. You need the energy."

Jess nodded, grateful for her kindness but determined to handle his discomfort on his own. As Emily left the room, he let out a small sigh of relief, hoping he could maintain the facade of being okay for just a little longer.

Jess eyed the tray of breakfast that had just been placed in front of him, a mix of scrambled eggs, toast, and fruit. The sight and smell of the food turned his stomach, and he swallowed hard, trying to keep the nausea at bay.

Rory, who had been watching him closely, noticed the subtle signs of his discomfort. She gently placed a hand on his arm. "Jess, are you feeling sick again?" she asked softly, her concern evident.

Jess tried to muster another reassuring smile, but it faltered. "I'm fine, Rory. Just... not very hungry right now."

Rory frowned, her worry deepening. "You need to eat something, though. It'll help keep your strength up."

He nodded, knowing she was right but struggling to find the will to force anything down. "I'll try," he promised weakly, picking up a piece of toast and taking a tentative bite. The dry bread seemed to swell in his mouth, and he quickly set it back down, closing his eyes and taking deep breaths to stave off the urge to vomit.

Rory's grip on his arm tightened slightly. It was obvious he wasn’t okay. "Jess, it's okay if you can't eat. We can ask Emily for something to help with the nausea."

Jess shook his head, not wanting to seem weak or needy. "I just need a minute. It'll pass."

Rory wasn't convinced but decided not to press further for now. "Alright, but if it doesn't get better, we're getting you some help. Deal?"

"Deal," he agreed, grateful for her understanding but wishing he could just manage on his own.

As Jess sat there, trying to gather the strength to eat, Rory stayed by his side. Her face was covered in concern and it didn’t exactly ease Jess’s discomfort. He was torn between letting Rory help him and appearing strong for her.

Jess sat there, feeling the weight of the uneaten breakfast and the nausea that threatened to overwhelm him. He glanced at Rory, who was watching him with those concerned blue eyes that he loved so much. He hated the idea of her seeing him like this—weak, struggling, and in pain. He didn't want to worry her, but he also didn't want to be alone. The internal battle was tearing him apart.

"Rory," he began, his voice hoarse. "Maybe you should go get some fresh air or something. You’ve been here all night."

Rory frowned, her brow furrowing. "Jess, are you trying to get rid of me?" She attempted to sound light-hearted, but the concern in her eyes betrayed her.

Jess shook his head quickly, regretting his words. "No, no, it's not that. I just... I don't want you to see me like this. I'm a mess right now."

Rory reached out and took his hand, her grip firm and reassuring. It hurt her heart to know that Jess still wasn’t comfortable with her seeing his raw pain. She had thought they had gotten past this the first time around. "Jess, I want to be here with you, no matter what. You don't have to hide anything from me."

He looked down at their joined hands, feeling a lump form in his throat. "I know, and I love you for that. But it's hard. I don't want you to see me hurting."

"Jess," Rory said softly, squeezing his hand. "I already know you're hurting. I'm here because I want to help you through it, not because I need you to be strong all the time."

Jess sighed, torn between wanting her comfort and not wanting to burden her. "It's just... sometimes I feel like I burden you too much with my troubles. You’ve stopped living your own life because of me.”

"That’s not true Jess.” Rory insisted, her voice gentle but firm. "You’re not a burden. I’m here because I love you and I want to support you through it. You're dealing with something incredibly hard, and no one expects you to do it alone. Especially not me."

It was something little Jess desperately needed to hear. Older Jess did too. Jess closed his eyes, trying to swallow the lump in his throat. "All I’ve ever known was how to deal with things on my own”

Rory’s gaze softened, her eyes reflecting pure sympathy. Jess still hadn’t told her too much about his childhood, not the hard stuff. “That sounds really tough, Jess. But you know now that you don’t have to deal with this on your own”, Rory assured him. “And if you ever want to talk about that, I’m always here. I just want to learn to understand you better.”

He took a deep breath, feeling a mix of relief and vulnerability. "Okay," he said finally. “I’ll tell you everything. When I’m ready.”

Rory smiled, leaning in to kiss his forehead gently. "Of course. Take your time. I’m not going anywhere.”

With that, Jess felt a bit of the tension ease from his body. He wasn't alone, and he didn't have to pretend he was okay. Rory was here, and for now, that was enough.

“So now, do you wanna tell me how you’re really feeling?” Rory asked gently.

Jess sighed. “Shitty. My whole body hurts. I can’t look at that toast without wanting to throw up and my head is pounding. The chemo side effects are coming in, I guess”, he admitted.

Rory looked at him sadly. She knew Jess often struggled with telling her how he really felt but it didn’t make it hurt any less when he hid his pain from her. “We should call a nurse. Emily could give you something for the pain.”

Jess hesitated, looking down at the untouched breakfast tray. He hated feeling like he needed help, but he also knew Rory was right. "Yeah, I guess we should," he said reluctantly.

Rory gave him a supportive smile. "I'll go get Emily. Just hang in there, okay?"

As she stepped out of the room, Jess leaned back against the pillows, closing his eyes. The throbbing in his head felt relentless, and the nausea was making it hard to focus on anything else. He heard Rory's voice in the hallway, speaking with Emily.

A few moments later, Emily walked in, her face full of concern. "Hey Jess, Rory said you're not feeling too hot. Let's see what we can do to make you more comfortable," she said, approaching his bedside.

Jess managed a weak smile. "Thanks, Emily. It's just... everything hurts right now."

Emily nodded sympathetically. "I understand. Chemo can be really tough on the body. I'm going to give you something for the pain and the nausea. It should help you feel better soon."

She prepared a syringe and injected it into his IV port, her movements efficient and gentle. "This will take a few minutes to kick in. In the meantime, let's check your vitals again."

Jess watched her go about her work, feeling a bit more at ease knowing relief was on the way. Rory returned to his side, sitting down and taking his hand in hers. "You're doing great, Jess," she said softly.

He squeezed her hand, grateful for her presence. "Thanks, Rory. I don't know what I'd do without you."

She smiled, her eyes filled with love. "You don't have to find out. I'm here for you, always."

The medication began to take effect, dulling the sharp edges of his pain and settling his stomach. Jess felt a wave of relief wash over him, his body starting to relax. "It's starting to work," he murmured.

Emily finished her checks and gave him a reassuring nod. "Good. Just rest now, Jess. If you need anything else, don't hesitate to call me."

"Thanks, Emily," he said, feeling a bit more at ease.

Rory continued to sit by his side, her presence a constant comfort. "Feeling any better?" she asked.

"Yeah, a bit," Jess admitted. "The pain is more manageable now."

Rory leaned in and kissed his forehead. "I’m glad. You deserve to feel comfortable.” She eyed her boyfriend lovingly. The small cut on his forehead had started to fade but the stitches still remained. He was laying back on the bed with the blanket tucked around his waist and his arms resting on his lap. She took his hand in hers and played with his slender fingers gently. Her eyes shifted to the yellow fall risk bracelet still accessorizing his wrist.

“When are you getting this off?” she asked with a slight smile tugging at her lips while she fidgeted with the bracelet.

“Julie said two weeks without falls and it’s gone.” Rory hummed and ran her fingers down to his palm.

Jess yawned and snuggled deeper into his pillows. “How can you be tired again? You slept like fifteen hours last night”, Rory laughed lovingly.

“You try getting chemo and see how you feel”, Jess said with an unserious voice.

“I know, I know. I'm just teasing. You’re handling it all so well”, she said now more seriously.

He didn’t feel like he was, but what did he know. Jess shifted on the bed to the other side. “Join me here”, he told Rory and lifted the blanket. Rory wasted no time and slipped under covers. With Jess having his blanket from home, it almost felt like cuddling in Jess’s own bed, minus the wires and machines that the wires connected into.

Rory chuckled softly as she settled beside Jess under the covers, their bodies comfortably close despite the hospital surroundings. She tucked herself against his side, feeling the warmth of his body against hers. The soft beep of the monitors and the distant hum of medical equipment faded into the background as they shared this quiet moment together.

Jess shifted slightly to find a more comfortable position, careful not to disturb the IV line in his arm. He sighed contentedly, feeling Rory's presence soothing his nerves. "This is nice," he murmured, his voice relaxed.

Rory nodded, brushing her fingers through his hair gently. "Yeah, it is. I missed this," she admitted softly, her eyes meeting his.

Jess smiled, his gaze softening as he looked at her. "I missed it too," he confessed, his hand finding hers under the blankets.

They lay together in comfortable silence for a while, the weight of everything they were going through seeming a little lighter in each other's company. Rory traced circles on Jess's hand with her thumb, feeling the rise and fall of his breath against her cheek. Rory adjusted herself to fit closer to him, her arm draped lightly over his waist.

Jess closed his eyes, relishing the sensation of Rory's presence beside him. Her soft breaths mingled with his, creating a serene atmosphere in contrast to the medical challenges he faced. He let out a quiet sigh, a mixture of relief and contentment.

"You're really warm," Rory murmured, breaking the comfortable silence. She nestled her head against his shoulder, her cheek resting against his chest. "Does that mean the chemo's working?"

Jess chuckled softly, a faint sound that held a hint of amusement despite everything. "I guess so," he replied, his voice quiet. "Or maybe it's just you."

Rory smiled against his chest, her heart swelling with affection. She lifted her head slightly to meet his gaze, her eyes searching his face. "You know, you don't have to pretend to be okay all the time," she said gently. "It's okay to let me see when you're not."

Jess hesitated for a moment, his gaze meeting hers. "I just... I don't want you to worry more than you already do," he admitted, his voice tinged with vulnerability.

Rory's expression softened, her fingers tracing patterns on his forearm. "I know," she murmured, her voice filled with empathy. "But I want to be here for you, Jess. All of you."

He nodded slightly, a small gesture of acceptance. "I know," he repeated softly. "Thank you, Rory."

They settled back into their quiet embrace, finding comfort in the shared warmth and closeness. Outside the hospital room, the world carried on with its usual hustle and bustle, but inside, Jess and Rory were cocooned in their own little sanctuary, where love and support were the strongest medicines of all.

Jess fell asleep into the soft embrace of his girlfriend. Rory tried not to worry about how much Jess was sleeping because she knew he needed it and how chemo drained him. Rory held him close, afraid to move too much in case she would wake him up. Rory gazed down at him with a mixture of love and concern, her fingers delicately brushing a lock of hair from his forehead. She twirled it around her finger before releasing it.

She could feel the warmth of his skin against hers. Carefully, she adjusted the blanket around him, tucking it snugly under his chin. Each movement was calculated, an effort to ensure his comfort without disturbing his much-needed rest.

Rory leaned in closer, pressing a gentle kiss against Jess's temple. She whispered softly, her voice barely audible in the peaceful stillness of the room. "I'm here, Jess," she murmured. "I'll always be here."

She settled back against the pillows, her arms still wrapped around him protectively. Her mind wandered to the challenges they had faced together, the moments of uncertainty and fear that had tested their resolve. Through it all, their love had remained a steadfast anchor, grounding them in the storm.

As Jess shifted in his sleep, his movements causing him to bury his face in the crook of Rory's neck, she felt a surge of tenderness mixed with profound sadness. His breaths were warm against her skin, a reminder of the fragile state of his health and the battles he faced daily.

Tears welled in Rory's eyes as she gently stroked his hair, her heart breaking at the thought of Jess spending his late teenage years confined to a hospital bed. He should have been out with friends, exploring the world, dreaming of his future. Instead, he was here, fighting a relentless illness that threatened to steal his youth and vitality.

"It's not fair," she whispered softly, more to herself than to Jess, though he stirred slightly at the sound of her voice. "You deserve so much more than this, Jess. You deserve to be living your best life right now."

She leaned her head against his, inhaling the scent of his hair, willing her love and strength to envelop him. Rory's mind raced with memories of happier times they had shared, moments filled with laughter and joy that now felt distant and overshadowed by the stark reality of hospital rooms and medical treatments.

Gently, she brushed a kiss against his forehead, her lips lingering in a silent promise of unwavering support and devotion. “I’ll never leave you”, she murmured softly.

The room remained tranquil, save for the soft sounds of their breathing and the steady beep of the heart monitor. Rory closed her eyes, savoring the intimacy of their embrace, finding solace in the simple act of being by Jess's side. She knew their journey would be fraught with challenges, but in this moment, surrounded by the warmth of his presence, she found hope and renewed strength to face whatever lay ahead.

Dr. Parker walked into the room, his footsteps soft on the linoleum floor. He paused at the sight before him, a gentle smile tugging at his lips. Jess and Rory lay entwined in each other's arms, Jess's head nestled against Rory's shoulder, his hand resting lightly on her waist. It was a poignant scene, filled with a mixture of love and vulnerability.

He cleared his throat softly to announce his presence, not wanting to startle them. Rory stirred first, her eyes fluttering open as she registered the doctor's presence. She gently extricated herself from Jess's embrace, careful not to wake him.

"Dr. Parker," she greeted softly, offering a small smile.

"Rory," Dr. Parker replied warmly. "How's he doing today?" he asked, nodding towards Jess.

Rory's smile faltered slightly, her gaze flickering back to Jess's peaceful sleeping face. "He's had a rough morning with nausea and pain. Emily gave him something, but he's been resting since then."

Dr. Parker nodded understandingly. "Chemo can be tough," he murmured, his eyes filled with empathy as he looked at Jess. "But he's strong. He's been handling it remarkably well."

Rory nodded, her expression reflecting a mixture of pride and concern. "He's been so brave," she agreed softly.

Dr. Parker stepped closer to Jess's bedside, checking his chart and the monitors. "We'll keep monitoring him closely," he assured Rory. "And we're here if he needs anything."

Rory nodded again, grateful for the doctor's reassurance. She watched as Dr. Parker made a few notes on Jess's chart, her thoughts drifting to how much Jess had been through and how much more he still had to endure.

As Dr. Parker turned to leave, Rory reached out and gently squeezed his arm. "Thank you, Dr. Parker," she said earnestly. "For everything."

Dr. Parker smiled kindly at her. "It's my job, Rory. But thank you for being here for him. It means a lot." He gently lifted the blanket off Jess and examined him with a gentleness that only a pediatric doctor could have. Rory watched with a mix of concern and admiration as he checked Jess's vital signs and adjusted the IV lines with practiced ease. Jess remained asleep, his breathing steady despite the tubes and monitors surrounding him.

“It’s clear how much you care about him”, Dr. Parker said softly.

Rory blushed a bit.  “Of course I do.”

“Jess will need all the support he can get during his treatment. I’m afraid it’ll only get tougher as time passes”, Dr. Parker said with more seriousness in his face.

“What do you mean?” Rory asked with a worried expression.

Dr. Parker covered Jess again with his blanket. “It’ll take stronger treatment regimes to get rid of his cancer this time around. Unfortunately, stronger treatment also means stronger side effects. And with the gene mutation that Jess has, we don’t know the full implications that it holds for him”, he explained, trying to use language that Rory would understand.

“So, he’ll be in more pain?” she asked with her eyes glistening with sadness.

“Unfortunately, he most likely will. But we will do whatever we can to keep him comfortable.”

Dr. Parker's expression softened as he saw the worry etched on Rory's face. "We have a good team here, Rory. We'll monitor him closely and adjust his medications as needed. The goal is to manage his pain and side effects as best as we can."

Rory nodded, trying to absorb everything he was saying. It was all so unfair and she felt so helpless. "What can I do to help him?"

"Just being here means more than you know. Keep encouraging him, supporting him, and letting him know he's not alone. It's important for his mental and emotional health," Dr. Parker replied, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

Rory looked down at Jess, her heart aching for the boy she loved. She gently stroked his hair, feeling the weight of Dr. Parker's words settle in. "I'll be here. Every step of the way."

Dr. Parker smiled warmly. "He's lucky to have you, Rory. If you have any questions or need anything, don't hesitate to ask. We're all in this together."

As Dr. Parker left the room, Rory sat quietly, her hand still on Jess's head. She knew the road ahead would be challenging, but she was determined to be his strength when he needed it most. Jess stirred slightly in his sleep, and Rory leaned down, whispering softly in his ear.

"I love you, Jess. We'll get through this together. I promise."

Rory stayed with Jess the entire day until nightfall. Jess slept a lot but when he was awake, Rory tried to coach him to eat and provide him with much-needed distractions by reading and just talking about mundane things. Jess was feeling too tired to go on a walk, but Rory helped him to the armchair by the window, so he got some change of scenery, even if it was just a few feet from his bed.

Now, Jess lay awake in the dark hospital room. He had slept too much during the day and he was struggling to fall asleep. Jess stared at the ceiling, the rhythmic beeping of the monitors a constant reminder of where he was. He wasn’t feeling too much pain but that was only due to the heavy medication he was on.

Out of boredom, Jess got his notebook and pen out from under his pillow and decided to just let out his thoughts onto the page.

It’s getting harder. The chemo and all the side effects. I’m tired all the time and I can’t eat much. I guess the fluid around my heart was also a side effect of chemo. Can’t wait to find out what more is in store for me. It’s scary to even think about it. But I can’t let them know I’m scared. I know I don’t have to be strong all the time but it’s easier said than done. I don’t want to add to their stress. They’re already so worried about me so how much worse would it be if I was actively struggling? I mean I am, but they don’t have to know that. I appreciate their support but it wouldn’t change anything if they knew. This is something I need to handle on my own. No one else can fight this battle for me. I hate when cancer is referred to as a battle. I mean yeah it’s tough as hell but you don’t have a choice once you get it. You can’t surrender like from a battle. And there’s no winning or losing this battle. If you beat cancer, it’ll still be a part of your life for the rest of your life, maybe not physically but mentally. And losing means dying. But it feels wrong to say. You lost the battle, so you die. It feels too black and white. I used to think things were just black or white. Good or bad. But I realized that in life, there’s always a gray area. I’m trying to see it more. But it makes life more complicated too. Sometimes it’s just easier without the gray area.

Jess wanted to keep going but his hand began cramping too much to continue. He set the pen down and flipped the pages, eyeing some of his previous entries. He hadn’t written too much before his relapse but while at the hospital, he found the need to vent had increased rapidly. The vulnerability that the entries possessed were unlike any emotion Jess had ever expressed before.

Being vulnerable was something Jess had learned not to do from an early age. Being vulnerable meant that others could hurt him. It meant they could laugh at him and see his weakness. When Jess was six, he decided to tell his then-stepfather, Dereck, about his bullies in school. He cried when he told him that the mean boys had pushed him to the ground and kicked his ribs. He told Dereck how they told all his classmates that Jess was a baby and still slept with his mom every night. They of course didn’t know that Jess had never been allowed to sleep with his mom. But when he told Dereck about the bullying, Dereck told him he deserved all the bullying because he was a worthless, unwanted child. Jess never talked about his bullying again.

Jess didn’t like thinking about his childhood, but he found the more he thought about it, the more he understood why he was the way he was. For example, he could understand why he felt like melting whenever Rory would touch him so gently and lovingly. He realized it was because that was what he had so deeply craved as a kid. Liz had never touched him gently. If she ever did, it was to push Jess out of the way or to grab his wrist forcefully when he was in trouble. The physical touch he received was never the tender, loving kind that he saw other children get from their parents. She never hugged him or let him cuddle next to her when he had had a terrifying nightmare.

The nights had been the worst. He would lie awake, staring at the ceiling, listening to the sounds of the apartment building – the distant chatter of neighbors, the hum of traffic outside, the occasional siren wailing through the night. Every shadow seemed menacing, every creak of the floorboards a potential threat. When he was younger, he used to have vivid nightmares, the kind that left him breathless and shaking. In those moments, he would have given anything for a comforting touch, a warm embrace to assure him that he was safe. But there was no one.

On particularly bad nights, Jess would sneak out of his room and tiptoe to his mother’s door, his heart pounding in his chest. He would stand there, hesitating, listening to her muffled laughter or the sound of the TV. Sometimes, he would muster the courage to knock, hoping against hope that she would open the door and pull him into a hug. But more often than not, he would turn away, retreating to his cold, lonely bed, knowing that the comfort he sought wasn’t behind that door.

These memories, though painful, helped Jess make sense of his present. They explained why he found solace in Rory’s touch, why he clung to it like a lifeline. Her gentle caresses and warm embraces filled a void that had been there for as long as he could remember. They soothed the wounds of his past, offering a balm to his battered soul and slowly healing his inner child. He reminded him that she loved and cared about him, something he hadn’t felt before meeting Rory.

Jess was pulled out of his thoughts by his door creaking open. Emily stepped in with a sympathetic smile on her face.

“Hi, Jess. Did the sandman skip you tonight?”

Jess chuckled slightly. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“That can happen sometimes.”

Emily stepped closer to his bed and checked the monitors before jotting down notes on his chart. “Your vitals look good. Are you feeling any pain or discomfort?” she asked as she checked the small incision spot on Jess’s chest where they had drained the fluid.

Jess shifted on the bed a little. He ran his fingers through his hair, a small manner he had done for years. “No, just a bit restless I think”, he replied as if he wasn’t quite sure himself.

“Mind if I sit with you for a while?” Emily asked. She looked at her patient with slight concern in her eyes. She knew Jess was dealing with a lot and she wanted to maybe ease his pain a little.

"Yeah, sure," Jess replied, his tone a mix of skepticism and gratitude.

Emily settled herself in the chair next to Jess's bed, her posture relaxed yet attentive. She folded her hands in her lap and looked over at him with a warm smile. "Sometimes it helps to have someone to talk to, especially in the quiet hours of the night."

Jess nodded slightly, feeling a flicker of hesitation. Opening up wasn't his strong suit, but there was something about Emily's presence that made him feel a bit more at ease. "Yeah, I guess," he admitted softly. "It's just... hard to sleep sometimes."

"I can imagine," Emily replied gently. "Being in the hospital, dealing with everything you're going through... it's not easy."

Jess shrugged nonchalantly, trying to downplay his own struggles. "Yeah, well, could be worse, I guess."

Emily studied him for a moment, her eyes filled with understanding. "You don't always have to put on a brave face, you know. It's okay to feel scared or frustrated."

Jess sighed quietly, his gaze fixed on his hands. "Yeah, I know. Just... not used to people caring, I guess."

Emily reached out and placed a reassuring hand on Jess's arm. "People do care, Jess. You have people here who want to see you get better."

Jess glanced up at her, his expression softening. He appreciated Emily's kindness, even if he found it difficult to accept sometimes. "Thanks," he murmured, his voice tinged with gratitude.

Emily sensed Jess's guardedness, understanding that he wasn't one to easily share his feelings. Yet, she felt compelled to continue reaching out, hoping to provide him some comfort during his stay.

"You know," Emily started gently, "I've seen a lot of patients over the years, and each one has their own way of coping. Some like to talk, others prefer to keep things to themselves. There's no right or wrong way to handle it."

Jess nodded slowly, his thoughts drifting as he considered her words. "Yeah, I guess everyone's different."

"Absolutely," Emily agreed, her tone encouraging. "But just know, it's okay to let people in sometimes. It doesn't make you weak to lean on others for support. I for once know that a certain girl who likes spending time in this room would like nothing more than to have you let her in. "

Jess bit his lip. He felt guilty that even the nurses knew how much Rory wanted to help him and yet he hadn’t opened up to her. “I know. I guess I should.”

Emily smiled slightly. “It would make things a lot easier for you.”

Emily then decided to steer the conversation into lighter topics. “Do you have any hobbies? Something to take your mind off things?” she asked him.

“I like to read. But I’ve never had any real hobbies.”

Emily nodded, her pen poised over Jess's chart as she listened attentively. "Reading is wonderful. It’s as real of a hobby as anything," she remarked with a warm smile. "What kind of books do you enjoy?"

Jess shifted slightly in bed, considering her question. "Mainly fiction," he replied quietly. "Sci-fi, fantasy... stuff like that."

"That's great," Emily said encouragingly. "Do you have any favorite authors or books?"

Jess hesitated for a moment, trying to recall titles. "I liked Harry Potter when I was younger," he admitted. "And I've been getting into some classic literature lately. It's... comforting."

Emily nodded understandingly. "Classics have a way of grounding us, don't they? What have you been reading recently?"

Jess relaxed a little, appreciating Emily's genuine interest. "I just finished 'To Kill a Mockingbird'," he said, his voice growing slightly more animated. "It's a bit heavy, but really powerful."

"That's a classic for a reason," Emily agreed. "It's good to lose yourself in a book, especially here."

"Yeah," Jess murmured softly, his gaze drifting to the window. "It helps pass the time."

Emily nodded sympathetically, jotting down a few notes. "Well, if you ever want to talk books or need recommendations, I'm your person," she offered warmly.

Jess managed a small smile. "Thanks, Emily. I appreciate it."

With a reassuring pat on his hand, Emily glanced at the monitors once more. "Alright, I'll let you rest. Just press the call button if you need anything, okay?"

Jess nodded gratefully, watching as she left the room. He decided that he was now tired enough to sleep, so he pulled the blanket up to his ears and sank into his pillow. It didn’t take long until he was snoring lightly.

The morning came too quickly for Jess’s liking. He was pulled away from his peaceful, pain-free slumber by a wave of nausea. Jess managed to pull the sick bag from beside his bed from muscle memory before he puked up the little bit of dinner he had managed to down yesterday. He groaned as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

He curled up on his side with the sick bag still next to him as he tried to ease the cramps in his stomach. “What a great way to start the morning”, he thought to himself. He pulled the blanket back on him as he felt a shiver coming.

He must have looked quite miserable because when Julie entered the room, she immediately said: “Oh dear, you don’t look well.” She gave him a new sick bag and gently felt his sweaty forehead with her hand. “You’re burning up hon”, she said sympathetically and took his temperature so she could jot the number into his chart.

Jess didn’t move as Julie worked on him. He was trying to preserve as much heat as possible and moving would mean losing some of it.

“You feeling any pain hon?” Julie asked, gently touching his shoulder to get his attention. She sensed that Jess wouldn’t be all that talkative this morning.

She would’ve been right because Jess only nodded slightly at her question. “Where’s the pain?” she continued the questioning.

“Everywhere”, Jess groaned with a hoarse voice. “Stomach and head mostly”, he continued because he knew she would ask.

“And what number is the pain out of 10?”

“A seven”, the unmoving lump of a boy answered.

Julie looked at him sadly and touched Jess’s back in a comforting manner. “Okay hon. I’m going to give you some extra medication for the pain and the fever you’re running. It might make you drowsy but it will keep you more comfortable. I’ll also increase the flow of your hydrating IV bag so you won’t get dehydrated”, she explained to the boy but she had a feeling he wasn’t really listening or comprehending what she was saying. She got a hum as an answer from him.

“I’ll be back later to check on you, okay dear? Just hang in there”, she said with a hint of concern in her voice. It was nothing but common for cancer patients to have nausea and fever, but for some reason, Julie always tended to worry more about Jess. She knew he was a strong kid, but she hated seeing him suffer so much.

Julie left the room, and Jess tried to get comfortable again. He closed his eyes and focused on his breathing, hoping the medication would kick in soon. The light was coming in through the shutters of the window but Jess was desperately trying to block it out. The soft hum of the machines and the distant sounds of the hospital created a strange sense of calm.

As Jess lay there, he thought about Rory and how much he missed her. He wished she could be there with him, holding his hand and telling him everything would be okay. He knew she’d be there as soon as visiting hours started, but it felt like an eternity away.

The pain in his stomach and head continued to throb, and Jess tried to distract himself by thinking about happier times. He thought of the stargazing date that Rory had set up for them in the winter. He thought of the Christmas spent at the Gilmore house and he thought of the surprise party that Rory, Lorelai and Luke had organized for him. He felt some sense of calm when he thought of these events, of the people involved in them.

Jess’s thoughts were interrupted by another wave of nausea, and he reached for the sick bag again. He felt weak and helpless, as his stomach cramped again, sending him doubling over in his bed, trying to ease the pain.

A soft knock on the door brought him back to the present, and he looked up to see Rory standing there, a concerned look on her face. She rushed to his side and took his hand, her touch instantly comforting.

“Hey, how are you feeling?” she asked softly, brushing his hair back from his forehead.

Jess managed a weak smile. “Not great,” he admitted.

Rory's eyes filled with concern as she sat down beside him. "I'm so sorry, Jess," she whispered, gently rubbing his back. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

Jess shook his head weakly. "Just having you here helps," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. He kept shivering despite being under a heavy blanket.

Rory stayed by his side, trying her hardest to comfort the ill boy. She gently stroked his hair and spoke to him in a soft, calming voice, trying to distract him from the discomfort. "Remember that time we forced Luke to take us to the bookstore in Hartford? And we picked out so many books the pile was so high we could barely get it out the door.”

Jess nodded, a faint smile playing on his lips as he remembered. "Yeah, that was a good day," he murmured.

"Or that time we went to that concert, and you were so excited you lost your voice the next day?" Rory continued, her voice filled with warmth and nostalgia.

Jess chuckled softly, the memory bringing a brief respite from his pain. "Yeah, that was fun."

Rory watched him closely, her heart aching to see him like this. "You're so strong, Jess," she said, her voice filled with admiration. "You're going to get through this. And then we can go back to making memories. The good ones."

Jess felt a wave of exhaustion wash over him, the pain and fever taking their toll. The medicine Julie had given him was starting to work, making him drowsy. He closed his eyes, feeling Rory's comforting presence beside him.

"I'm so tired," he mumbled, his voice fading.

"Then sleep, love. I'll be right here," Rory whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead.

Jess fell asleep soon, exhausted by the pain and fever. Rory watched over him, her heart breaking for the boy she loved. She held his hand, praying silently for his strength and recovery, determined to stay by his side through it all.

Chapter Text

The next weeks passed with a very similar pattern. Jess was on chemo for five days and then he had five days without chemo before starting it again. He was increasingly tired and had a fever on and off. Nausea also had a tight grip on him, which resulted in Jess being unable to eat much.  He was frustrated and crabby and probably not that fun company, but Rory and the others still visited him every day.

Jess had now done four rounds of tough chemo. The dosage was higher than when Jess was battling cancer for the first time and hence his side effects were worse. Dr. Parker had hoped that the increased dosage would be more effective in getting rid of the stubborn cancer cells.

It was time to find out now. He was about to get a bone marrow biopsy to find out whether the treatment had been working.

Jess lay on his side on the examination table, his heart pounding with a mix of anxiety and resignation. He'd been through so much already, but the thought of a bone marrow biopsy still made his stomach churn. Rory was beside him, her hand firmly holding his, providing a comforting presence in the sterile room. Dr. Parker and his nurse Emily prepared the necessary instruments.

Dr. Parker approached Jess with a reassuring smile. "Jess, we're going to make sure you're as comfortable as possible. You'll feel some pressure, but it shouldn't be painful."

Emily gently lifted Jess's shirt, exposing his lower back. She cleaned the area with an antiseptic solution, the cold liquid sending a shiver through him. Rory tightened her grip on him and Jess bit his lip as he locked eyes with her.

Next, Dr. Parker injected a local anesthetic into Jess's skin and deeper tissues over the back of his hip bone. Jess winced slightly at the initial sting but then felt a gradual numbing sensation spread through the area. The procedure was similar to the ones he had had before, like the spinal tap and the fluid draining but Jess still felt uneasy whenever he was brought to the operation room and poked with obnoxiously large needles.

"Okay, Jess, the area should be numb now," Dr. Parker said, his voice calm and steady. Jess felt his glove-covered hands touching his back but as he moved to the area where the biopsy would be taken from, he felt nothing. "You'll feel some pressure and pushing, but it shouldn't hurt."

Jess nodded, his grip tightening on Rory's hand. She leaned closer, whispering words of encouragement in his ear.

Dr. Parker made a small incision to facilitate the insertion of the biopsy needle. Jess could feel the pressure as the needle was inserted into his hip bone, but the pain was muted by the local anesthetic. Dr. Parker worked methodically, talking Jess through each step, which eased his anxiety a tad. Rory had to keep her eyes on Jess’s face. The size of the needle would make her faint if she saw it, especially knowing it was going straight into her dear boyfriend.

"You might feel some more pressure now, Jess," Dr. Parker said as he maneuvered the needle to extract a small core of bone marrow. Jess felt a deep, uncomfortable pressure and a dull ache, but he had experienced worse. This was still light work compared to everything else he had endured.

Rory continued to hold Jess's hand, her other hand brushing his hair back from his forehead. "You're doing amazing, Jess. Almost done."

Finally, Dr. Parker removed the needle and applied firm pressure to the site to stop any bleeding. Emily quickly placed a bandage over the incision and helped Jess adjust his clothing.

"All done, Jess," Dr. Parker said with a reassuring smile. "You did great. We'll monitor the site to make sure there's no infection or excessive bleeding. You can rest now."

Jess exhaled deeply, relieved that the procedure was over. The dull ache in his hip persisted, but it was manageable. Rory helped him sit up slowly. She held her hand on his upper back and neck, playing with the hair on the nape of his neck. It sent a shiver down Jess’s back, but not the bad kind.

"Thank you," Jess said, his voice weak but sincere. He felt drained, as if the liquid they had drained from his bone marrow was the one reserving all of his energy and it was taken away from him.

"You're welcome, Jess," Dr. Parker replied. "We'll have the results soon, and we'll discuss the next steps based on those findings."

Back in his room, Jess felt the familiar wave of exhaustion wash over him as Emily prepared to take a blood test. Jess had grown used to the blood tests and although they often used his port instead of straining his veins, sometimes the port access became blocked and they needed to draw his blood the traditional way. The fluorescent lights of the hospital room felt harsh, and he closed his eyes for a moment, trying to gather his strength. Rory sat beside him, her hand gently stroking his hair, a soothing gesture that helped calm him.

Emily worked efficiently, her movements precise as she tied a tourniquet around Jess's arm. "Just a small pinch," she said softly, and Jess barely flinched as the needle slid into his vein. He watched the vial fill with his blood, feeling weirdly aware that the blood was coming from his body. He thought of the technicians analyzing his blood and determining whether he was just as sick or sicker than when he was last tested.

"All done," Emily said, pressing a small piece of gauze to the puncture site before securing it with tape. "You’ve become a real champ at this.”

Jess managed a tired smile, but he could feel the day's procedures weighing heavily on him. He leaned back into the pillows, feeling utterly spent. Rory's fingers continued their gentle rhythm through his hair, and he turned his head slightly to look at her, grateful for her unwavering presence.

"You should rest now," Rory whispered, her voice a comforting lullaby. "You've had a long day."

Jess nodded, his eyelids growing heavier with each passing second.

"I'm here, Jess," Rory murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. "Just rest."

With Rory's gentle touch and comforting presence, Jess felt the tension slowly ebb away. His breathing grew deeper and more even as he succumbed to the overwhelming exhaustion. The hospital room faded into the background, and he drifted off into a deep, much-needed sleep, knowing that Rory would be there when he woke up.

When Jess woke up, there wasn’t only Rory in his room but also Lorelai and Luke. Jess rubbed his eyes tiredly before they could focus on anything.

“Hey kid. You’ve been asleep for a while”, Luke said while patting his shoulder gently.

“Yeah, if a while means several hours”, Lorelai snorted. “Good to see you awake”, she continued with less sarcasm this time.

“Rory said you were really brave with the biopsy”, Luke said.

Jess rubbed his eyes tiredly, feeling the familiar ache in his bones. "Brave, huh? Yeah, because lying there and getting poked with needles is my idea of a fun time," he replied, his voice laced with sarcasm.

Lorelai smiled sympathetically. "Well, you handled it better than most people would, that's for sure."

Jess shrugged, trying to sit up a bit. Rory immediately reached over to help him adjust his pillows.  Jess managed a small smile, but it quickly turned into a wince as a sharp pain shot through his hip. The incision site was no longer numb and it was protesting against the movement. Rory noticed his pain immediately and gently squeezed his hand. "Are you okay?" she asked softly, concern etched on her face.

"Just peachy," Jess muttered, trying to mask the pain. "Feels like I got hit by a truck, but other than that, I'm fantastic."

Rory, Lorelai and Luke all had the same expression on their faces. Deep concern.

“We should ask a nurse to give you some meds to make you feel better”, Luke said as he watched his eighteen-year-old nephew struggle to even sit up without wincing in pain.

“What’s the point? It only works for a few hours and then I need more and more and my tolerance goes up so the same dosage won’t do it next time and soon I’m hooked on opioids. No thanks.”

Rory squeezed his hand gently. "I get it, Jess. But you don't have to be in pain. We just want you to be as comfortable as possible."

Jess sighed, knowing they were right but still feeling frustrated. "Fine, call the nurse," he said, his voice resigned. "But I'm serious about not wanting to rely on meds too much."

Lorelai stood up and pressed the call button for the nurse. "We'll figure it out, Jess. One step at a time."

A few moments later, Emily walked in, a concerned look on her face. "How are you feeling, Jess?"

"Like crap," he admitted. "Can I get something for the pain?"

Emily nodded and quickly set about preparing a dose of pain medication. As she worked, she glanced at Rory, Lorelai, and Luke, who were all watching Jess with worried eyes. "It’s normal to need pain medication after the procedure. We'll keep an eye on his pain management and make sure he's comfortable without overmedicating," she reassured them.

Jess watched as Emily injected the med into his IV, and soon enough he felt the effect start to take the edge off his pain. "Thanks," he muttered, closing his eyes.

”I heard that your biopsy results are in. Dr. Parker should be here shortly to discuss them with you”, Emily said before exiting the room.

Rory’s grip on Jess’s hand tightened immediately when she heard Emily’s words. They had all been dreading the results. Anxiety over whether the news would be good or bad had filled their heads for days before the biopsy. And soon they’d hear the results.

Jess was convinced that the news would be good. The increased chemo had made him feel like crap all the time so to find out that it hadn’t even been working and it was all for nothing would be crushing. He thought that certainly it would work with the way it had made him feel.

Luke, Lorelai, and Rory had all tried to be optimistic, if not for anything else but for the sake of Jess. They had all watched him struggle so much during the past few weeks. They couldn’t bear the thought that he would have to endure even harsher treatments if the chemo hadn’t worked.

Jess had to ball his fists to keep his hands from shaking too much. His anxiety was through the roof and there was no hiding it anymore. He closed his eyes and leaned back, taking a deep breath and trying to ground himself. He was actively trying to avoid having a panic attack in front of his loved ones.

Luke glanced at Jess, concern etched deeply on his face. "Hey, kid, it's going to be okay," he said softly, his voice steady despite his own unease. “I’m sure the treatment worked.”

Lorelai nodded in agreement. "Yeah, whatever the news, we're here with you. You're not alone in this."

Rory leaned closer to Jess, her voice gentle and reassuring. "You're strong, Jess. You've already come so far. We'll face whatever comes next together."

Jess nodded, grateful for their support but unable to shake the overwhelming fear gnawing at him. "I know," he managed to say, his voice strained. "Thanks."

Just then, Dr. Parker entered the room, a somber expression on his face. He greeted everyone with a nod before focusing his attention on Jess. "Hello, Jess. How are you feeling today?"

Jess swallowed hard, his throat suddenly dry. "Nervous," he admitted quietly.

Dr. Parker nodded understandingly. "I understand. Waiting for test results is never easy." He pulled up a chair and sat down beside Jess's bed, his expression serious but compassionate. "I have the results from your bone marrow biopsy.” There was a long pause between the sentences. “Unfortunately, the treatment hasn’t been as effective as we would have hoped, and we’ll have to look at other treatment techniques to kill off all the cancer cells in your body.”

The doctor looked at his patient with an apologetic expression. It was never fun to break bad news to people. “I’m really sorry Jess”, he added.

Jess felt like he was having an out-of-body experience. He couldn’t speak or move, and he felt like he was watching the scene unfold from the ceiling of the room. Like it wasn’t him on the hospital bed but someone else entirely and Jess was just there to witness it. Maybe that was why he couldn’t breathe. Because he wasn’t real.

“S-so what does that mean for Jess?”, Luke asked with his voice wavering. Lorelai had her arm on Luke’s back in a comforting manner. Everyone in the room needed all the comfort they could get right now. But leave it to Luke to have a logical, ‘what’s-the-next-step’ type of question when all Jess wanted to do was lash out angrily.

“The best course of action will be a bone marrow transplant. It unfortunately is a very invasive treatment regime, but it has proven to be the most effective in cases similar to Jess’s. Often, a family member is a suitable donor but if not, Jess will be put on the list. We’ll isolate Jess in a quarantine room as we’ll have to kill off all of his cells in his bone marrow which puts him in a very vulnerable state. Then the donor’s cells are transferred, and they will start producing healthy cells”, Dr. Parker explained the procedure in simple terms.

Everyone’s faces were a different mix of sadness, disappointment, confusion, and anger. Only Luke seemed to be able to produce coherent sentences. He was clearly plotting the plan, ready to conquer whatever was put in his nephew’s way together.

“I’m the only family Jess has. Test me. Today”, he spoke out. He was ready to do anything for his nephew's sake and if he was a suitable donor, he’d sure as hell donate all of his cells to Jess if it meant that he would get better.

“I’ll send a nurse in soon”, Dr. Parker said. “I know this is all a lot to take in. If you have questions, I’m happy to answer them. I also want you all to know that we are determined to cure Jess and he is getting the best possible care here.”

Silence fell into the room as Dr. Parker left. No one knew what to say. Rory looked ready to cry. Lorelai tried to comfort her. Luke had a determined look on his face. Jess was angry. He was so incredibly angry at the stupid cancer that just wouldn’t leave him alone. He had suffered and lost so much because of it. Why couldn’t it just leave him the fuck alone? The healthy coping mechanisms were nowhere to be seen when Jess could no longer keep his anger contained and he exploded.

“It’s not fucking fair! I don’t want to do this anymore. I’m sick of being sick. I just wanna go home and not feel like crap for once. All that chemo was for nothing. I poisoned my body for nothing. Look at me! I’m a fucking ghost. Except ghosts don’t feel pain and I have more pain than I thought was possible. Why do I always have to deal with the worst crap? Haven’t I suffered enough? What could I have possibly done so wrong in my last life that I’m punished this way? I have a mom who couldn’t give two shits about me and a dad that abandoned me the day I was born. Rory was the first person to say that she loves me and only with her did I learn that when somebody touches you, it doesn’t automatically mean they are gonna hurt you. I can never be normal or liked by people and everyone will just always see me as a failure because I failed to beat cancer and it’s not fair. It’s like my life’s been controlled by some fucking entity that wanted to know how to make someone so miserable that they crack at the ripe age of eighteen. I bet it enjoys watching me suffer cuz there’s no way this is real. I can’t do this anymore!”

Jess didn’t notice at what point the tears started to roll down his cheeks. He also didn’t notice when Luke had sat on his bed and when he had pulled him into a hug. But now he noticed that he was sobbing into Luke’s shoulder and he was crying so hard he could barely breathe. Luke had one hand behind his head and the other one on his back. He was gently rocking Jess from side to side and Jess would’ve felt embarrassed by the way his tears were soaking Luke’s shirt, but he couldn’t find the will now when he felt like the whole world was collapsing on him and Luke was the only one holding it in place.

“It’s not fair”, Jess sobbed quietly into Luke’s shoulder.

“Shh, it’s okay buddy. Just take it easy”, Luke said with the steadiest voice he could muster. He couldn’t let his own emotions through, not right now when his nephew needed him.

Rory was sobbing in her mother’s embrace as she watched Jess in such distress. Lorelai held Rory tightly, her own heart breaking for Jess and the anguish he was going through. She whispered words of comfort to Rory, trying to soothe her daughter's pain while tears streamed down her own cheeks.

Meanwhile, Luke continued to hold Jess close, his grip firm yet gentle. He knew Jess needed to let out his emotions, to grieve for the shattered hopes, and face the daunting prospect of a bone marrow transplant. As Jess cried into his shoulder, Luke softly murmured reassurances, hoping to offer some semblance of strength and support.

"It's okay to be angry, Jess," Luke said, his voice steady but filled with empathy. "It's okay to feel like it's not fair. We're here for you, no matter what happens next."

Jess clung to Luke, his body trembling with the intensity of his emotions. He wanted to scream, to lash out at the unfairness of it all, but all he could manage were choked sobs. He was still so angry but he felt oh so pathetic. Anger and sadness had often become mixed in his brain ever since he was a child. He wanted to remain sad but all he could feel was deep sorrow.

Luke continued to hold him, rocking him gently, offering silent solidarity and unwavering support. The room was filled with the rawness of their emotions. No one was holding back how they felt. Lorelai gently stroked Rory's hair, tears falling freely as she whispered words of encouragement to her daughter, who was in a similar condition to Jess. Luke glanced at Lorelai as both of them were embracing their kids. And yes, Jess was Luke’s kid. Anyone who looked at them could tell that much.

Lorelai wiped her tears and kissed the top of Rory’s head. She reached out to touch Luke’s leg. Luke gave her a knowing look.

Eventually, Jess’s sobs subsided. Luke felt the fight draining from the boy’s body and it being replaced by deep fatigue. Luke gently laid him back down on the bed and wiped the tear tracks off his face. Jess’s eyes were red and puffy and he had trouble keeping them open. Luke ran his fingers through the boy’s hair as Jess shifted on the bed to get more comfortable. He fell asleep in a matter of seconds.

His breakdown left everyone speechless. They had never seen Jess so emotional. Luke tried to hold his own emotions in as a nurse came to draw his blood to test whether he’d be a suitable donor for Jess. He felt unreal for even having to do this but now that the situation was this, he didn’t hesitate one bit. If he had a chance to save Jess’s life, he would do it, no questions asked.

Rory moved closer to Jess’s bed and gently took his limp hand in hers. She lifted his hand and kissed it softly. Jess’s face remained in a frown even when asleep. She could see the toll the news had taken on him, the deep lines of worry etched into his features even in slumber.

Lorelai stepped forward, placing a comforting hand on Rory's shoulder. "He’s strong, Rory. He’ll get through this," she said softly, trying to offer reassurance even as her own heart ached for Jess.

“He has to”, Rory whispered.

Luke remained seated on the edge of Jess's bed, his eyes never leaving his nephew. He gently ran his fingers through Jess's hair, the way he had seen Rory do. "It's gonna be tough on him," Luke said quietly, his voice thick with emotion. "But he’s a fighter."

Rory nodded, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. "I know," she whispered, squeezing Jess’s hand a little tighter. "I just hate seeing him like this."

Lorelai knelt beside Rory, wrapping her arms around her daughter. "We all do, sweetie. But we’re here for him, and we’ll help him through it. One step at a time."

Jess stirred slightly, letting out a small groan as he shifted in his sleep. Luke continued to stroke his hair, murmuring soothing words. "Just rest, Jess. We’re right here with you."

Rory leaned her head against the bed, still holding Jess’s hand. "We’re not going anywhere," she whispered, more to herself than to anyone else. She watched as Jess’s breathing evened out, his body finally succumbing to the exhaustion.

As the room fell into a hushed silence, the weight of the situation settled over them all. They knew the road ahead would be difficult, filled with uncertainty and challenges. But they were determined to be there for Jess every step of the way.

Lorelai looked at Luke, seeing the worry in his eyes. "Poor kid," she said softly, echoing the sentiment they all felt. "He’s been through so much already."

Luke nodded, his gaze still fixed on Jess. "Yeah," he agreed, his voice barely above a whisper. "But he’ll get through this as well. One step at a time.”

Rory sighed, her thumb gently rubbing circles on the back of Jess’s hand. "One step at a time," she repeated, finding a small measure of comfort in the words.

They all decided to stay at the hospital with Jess. The boy slept fitfully as the rest of them nodded off once in a while. The small hospital room was filled with a heavy sense of worry and exhaustion.

Rory stayed closest to Jess, never letting go of his hand. She dozed off in the uncomfortable chair, her head resting on the edge of Jess's bed. Her fingers intertwined with his, providing a small comfort to them both. Every so often, she would wake up, her eyes darting to Jess's face, watching for any sign of distress.

Lorelai found a spot on the armchair near the window. She wrapped herself in a thin hospital blanket, her eyes never straying far from her daughter and Jess. She knew how much this weighed on Rory, and seeing Jess suffer was almost unbearable. Every now and then, she would get up to stretch and check on them, offering quiet words of comfort and encouragement.

Luke positioned himself in a chair on the other side of Jess's bed. He stayed vigilant, his eyes heavy with sleep but refusing to close. He kept one hand resting on Jess's arm, a silent promise that he was there and wouldn’t leave. He dozed intermittently, his head nodding forward before jerking back up, determined to stay awake as long as he could.

As the hours ticked by, the night nurse came in periodically to check on Jess, adjusting his IV and monitoring his vitals. She moved quietly, understanding the need for peace and allowing the family their space.

Jess's sleep was restless, his body twitching occasionally as he mumbled incoherent words. The pain and anxiety of the day had taken its toll, but the presence of his loved ones provided a small solace.

Throughout the night, they all took turns staying awake and watching over Jess. Whenever one of them started to drift off, another would rouse slightly, keeping a vigilant eye on the boy. They made sure he would never have to feel alone, to never have to face his fears alone anymore.

Chapter Text

The next morning, Dr. Parker came in to explain in more detail what the bone marrow transplant would entail for Jess. He looked around the room to see tired faces etched with concern and he put on his most compassionate voice. The family inside had already endured too much.

Jess had woken up feeling a bit better. He had Rory on the bed with him, which helped him to be more at ease. Lorelai and Luke sat on the right side of the bed, their eyes glued on Dr. Parker as he began explaining the next steps.

“So, the good news is that Luke, you seem to be a suitable donor for Jess. We’ll still need to perform a healthy check on you but if everything’s good, you’ll be cleared to be Jess’s donor”, Dr. Parker started on a positive note to hopefully ease the thick atmosphere in the room. Luke squeezed Jess’s hand as he heard the news. Jess smiled at him slightly.

“The faster we move with this, the better chance we have for completely clearing out the cancer in your body, Jess. Hence, I suggest we move forward immediately. The treatment starts with a conditioning period. During this time, we will give you a high dosage of chemotherapy and possibly some radiation to destroy all the cancer cells in your bone marrow. Unfortunately, this also gets rid of the healthy cells, so we have to put you in an isolation room to protect you from any infections. The conditioning lasts for a week and it is followed by the transplant, where the harvested stem cells are infused to your bloodstream”, Dr. Parker paused for a while to study the faces of everyone in the room. Luke had a serious look on his face, similar to Jess’s. Rory looked worried, much like her mother.

“After the infusion, the engraftment follows. This is the process where the new stem cells travel to the bone marrow and begin to produce new blood cells. It typically starts about 10-20 days post-transplant. You’ll be monitored closely for the whole treatment as you will be very vulnerable and prone to infections. As for side effects, you can expect symptoms similar to those you have experienced so far. However, they may be more intense. You will most likely feel very sick until the new stem cells start properly working, which may take weeks. And unfortunately, you will need to remain in isolation until we deem it safe for you to leave, which could very well take six to eight weeks.”

Jess was biting his lip. It seemed like he was going to be pretty damn miserable for the whole time. But he had no choice. If he wanted to live, he needed to go through with the transplant.

“We can still visit him while he is in the isolation room, right?” Rory asked with uncertainty in her voice.

“Yes, you may visit Jess, but only if you are 100% healthy. As said, Jess’s immune system will be compromised and we don’t want to repeat what happened last time”, Dr. Parker said, referring to when Jess caught an infection during his initial hospitalization and had to stay in the ICU for days.

Rory nodded understandingly.

“Jess, do you have any questions?” Dr. Parker asked, turning his attention fully to his patient.

Jess suddenly felt nervous as everyone’s eyes turned to him. He fidgeted with his hands. “Will this cure me?” his brown eyes looked almost pleading as he asked the question.

Dr. Parker's expression softened as he considered Jess's question carefully. He knew the gravity of what Jess was asking, and the weight behind the answer.

"I wish I could give you a definitive yes, Jess," Dr. Parker began sincerely, his voice gentle yet tinged with the reality of the situation. "A bone marrow transplant gives us a powerful tool to fight your leukemia, and it offers a chance at a cure. But as with any medical procedure, there are no guarantees."

Jess nodded slowly, absorbing Dr. Parker's words. He tried to focus on the positive. There was a chance of full remission. That’s what he needed to hear.

"We're doing everything we can to give you the best possible chance," Dr. Parker continued, his tone reassuring. "Your response to the treatment and your overall health will play a significant role in how successful this transplant is."

Jess took a deep breath, his brow furrowing slightly with the weight of the uncertainty.

"We'll monitor your progress closely and adjust our approach as needed," Dr. Parker added, hoping to provide some measure of reassurance. "And remember, you have a strong support system here rooting for you every step of the way."

Jess managed a small nod, appreciating Dr. Parker's honesty and the support he felt from those around him.

"Any other questions, Jess?" Dr. Parker asked gently, ready to address any further concerns or uncertainties Jess might have.

"Okay, doc," Jess began with a hint of a mischievous smile, "once I'm done with all this, can I go skydiving or is that off the table?"

Dr. Parker chuckled softly, appreciating Jess's attempt to lighten the mood. "Skydiving might be a bit of a stretch right after a bone marrow transplant, but we'll have to see how you're feeling," he replied with a playful twinkle in his eye. "We'll aim for less adventurous activities first, like taking a leisurely walk outside."

"Alright, no skydiving right away," Jess nodded, his playful spirit shining through despite the challenges ahead. "I'll settle for a walk in the park then."

Dr. Parker nodded in agreement. "That sounds like a plan," he said warmly. "We'll focus on getting you through this first, and then we'll talk about skydiving."

The room shared a moment of lighter-heartedness, easing some of the tension as they prepared for the journey ahead.

Dr. Parker told them that they were preparing a room for Jess and he’d be transferred there later that day. Luke decided that he wanted to stay with Jess at least until the transplant. He hated the thought of Jess enduring all that pain alone and even though he couldn’t do much to ease the physical pain, he could be there for Jess and ease his anxiety.

Dr. Parker concluded their discussion by explaining the logistics of Jess's upcoming transfer to the specialized room. "We'll have everything ready by this afternoon," he assured them, jotting down notes in Jess's chart. "A nurse will come by to walk you through what to expect once Jess is settled in the new room."

Luke nodded, his jaw set with determination. He glanced at Jess, who looked exhausted but relieved to have his uncle's unwavering support. "Thanks, Doc," Luke said earnestly. "We appreciate everything you're doing for him."

Dr. Parker offered a sympathetic smile. "It's my job, Luke. And Jess is lucky to have you all here," he replied warmly before excusing himself to attend to his other patients.

Once the doctor left, Luke turned back to Jess and placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "You ready for this, buddy?" he asked softly, trying to lighten the mood.

Jess managed a weak smile. "As ready as I'll ever be," he replied, his voice tinged with a mix of apprehension and determination.

Rory and Lorelai hovered nearby, offering silent support. Rory squeezed Jess's hand gently. "You've got this, Jess," she said encouragingly. "We're all here for you."

Lorelai nodded, her expression reflecting both worry and confidence in equal measure. "You're the toughest kid I know," she added with a hint of a smile.

As they waited for the nurses to prepare Jess for the transfer, Luke settled into a chair beside Jess's bed, determined to stay by his side throughout the entire process. He knew it wouldn't be easy, but seeing Jess surrounded by his family brought a sense of strength and unity to the daunting journey ahead.

As Jess was wheeled out of his current room towards the isolation ward, Lorelai and Rory walked alongside, their expressions a mix of concern and hope. They halted just outside the door, hands gripping the bedrail of Jess's bed.

"You're going to be fine, Jess," Rory reassured him, her voice tinged with emotion. She leaned down and hugged him gently, careful not to disturb the IV lines or the monitors attached to him.

Lorelai followed suit, squeezing his hand warmly. "We'll call you every day, okay? And visit whenever we can," she promised, her voice wavering slightly.

Jess managed a faint smile, feeling their support wash over him like a comforting embrace. "Thanks, guys," he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. "I'll see you soon."

Rory leaned her forehead against Jess’s. They shared a tender kiss in the corridor of the hospital. “I love you”, Rory whispered, trying to keep her tears from shedding.

“I love you too”, Jess answered, his hand cupping Rory’s cheek lovingly. People around them were watching the tender moment with sad smiles on their faces. They were happy that the two had each other to rely on, but it was obvious the situation wasn’t ideal. No eighteen-year-old should be locked in a tiny room for six to eight weeks with no access to the outside world.

With a final squeeze of his hand, Lorelai and Rory reluctantly stepped back as the nurses began to push Jess through the door into the isolation room. They watched him disappear from their view, their hearts heavy with worry yet filled with hope for his recovery.

"We'll be waiting for you," Rory called out softly, her words echoing down the corridor as Jess was wheeled away, leaving Lorelai and Rory standing together, silently offering their unwavering support from afar.

The new room wasn’t too different from Jess’s previous one. It was small, white, had some plastic chairs and one armchair, a big window, a TV, and a door to the bathroom. The difference was the entrance. There were two doors and in between them was a small space where people entering the room had to disinfect themselves. There was also a window on the other wall, which showed a view to the corridor. Jess preferred to keep the blinds shut for privacy though.

There wasn’t much Jess could do to make the room feel homier. He was sure the Gilmore girls would show up with loads of decorations for him, but for now, all he had was a few stacks of books and his own bedding. He didn’t have too much entertainment there but from what he was told, he was pretty sure he’d spend most of his time sleeping or in excruciating pain, so he figured he didn’t need much. And if he got bored Luke would fetch something for him. Jess was pretty sure he could ask for the moon and Luke would try his hardest to try to get it for him if it meant that Jess would be happy. Maybe now was the time to ask for the concert tickets he had been eyeing for a while.

It was weird that now the nurses and doctors had to wear protective clothing like masks and thick gloves when they were in his room. It made Jess feel like he was infected with some dangerous highly contagious disease even though he knew it was to protect him. It still didn’t mean he liked it.

At least he still had his own nurses there. He probably couldn’t deal if he had to face new nurses because there was always the risk that they would treat him like Gemma did. Emily started Jess on his pre-transplant chemo which was different and a way higher dose than his usual chemotherapy.

“You’ll get this for five days first and then we’ll do a scan to see how much of your bone marrow is still there. Then the doctors will make a decision whether you need more chemo or radiation”, she explained as she started the drip. She ensured the IV was properly placed and checked the site for any irritation.

“This is it then. I’ll make sure to enjoy the ride”, Jess said with a hint of cynicism in his voice.

Emily touched his shoulder lightly. “I know this will be a very difficult road for you, Jess. We’re gonna support you every step of the way. Just try to take it easy.”

“Yeah, I don’t suppose I’ll start tap dancing any time soon.”

Luke sat on the armchair and tried to pretend he was watching the football game on TV when in fact he was only concerned about Jess. The kid was doing alright so far, the side effects of the intense chemo not yet hitting him. He was lazily reading a book, oblivious to his uncle watching him.

Luke realized he wasn’t very well prepared for the time at the hospital. He had no spare clothes, toiletries, food, or anything else for that matter. The thing was, he was allowed to leave the room, unlike Jess. He thought he would’ve showed Jess solidarity and stayed with him in isolation but he now realized he couldn’t do it without proper equipment.

“Hey, I need to run to the store to get some clothes and toiletries and stuff. Do you need anything at all?” he asked Jess, who barely looked up from his book.

“I guess not.”

Luke stood up from the chair. “Okay, well text me if you think of anything. I’ll be back soon.”

When Luke returned from his store run, Jess was asleep on the bed with his book upside down on his stomach.

As Luke eyed Jess from a shorter distance, he noticed something unusual on his neck. Angry red hives were climbing up his neck and Luke panicked instantly. He pulled down the blanket and unbuttoned Jess’s shirt only to see his whole torso covered in similar redness.

He instantly reached for the call button. He knew an allergic reaction when he saw one and he knew that hives were painful.

It took a while for Emily to come in as she needed to put on the protective clothing. As she stepped into the room, she was met by the unfortunate sight.

“I just noticed these on him”, Luke said pacing back and forth next to his nephew’s bed. Emily stepped closer to Jess and eyed the hives before gently touching Jess’s skin.

“It seems like he is allergic to the new chemo. I’ll go get Dr. Parker immediately so we can change the chemo and get some antihistamines into Jess.”

The closing of the door woke Jess up from his light slumber. He cringed when he saw the state of his skin. And then he felt it too. It felt like a thousand fire ants had burned him with acid. “Fuck”, he said, and only then did Luke realize that Jess had woken up.

“Dr. Parker is coming soon, he’ll get this sorted”, Luke comforted the boy. He wanted to touch his shoulder supportively but he knew it would only hurt Jess more.

Jess’s breathing was shallow, the discomfort evident on his face. “Why can’t anything just go right for once?” he groaned, frustration mixing with the pain.

Luke didn’t have an answer and he doubted Jess wanted an answer for the rhetorical question anyway.

Dr. Parker arrived shortly after, donning his protective gear. He quickly assessed the situation, his face serious but calm. “Jess, it looks like you’re having an allergic reaction to the chemo. We’re going to stop the current treatment and give you some antihistamines to help with the hives and itching. We’ll also discuss alternative chemo options.”

Jess nodded weakly, his eyes closing as he tried to block out the discomfort. “Okay,” he whispered, too tired and too uncomfortable to say much else.

Emily administered the antihistamines while Dr. Parker and Luke talked quietly about the next steps. The medication took effect quickly, and Jess began to feel some relief from the itching and burning sensation on his skin.

“We’ll monitor him closely,” Dr. Parker said. “The antihistamines should help with the immediate reaction, but we need to find a new chemo protocol that Jess can tolerate. It’s going to be trial and error, but we’ll find a solution.”

Luke nodded, his expression determined. “We’ll do whatever it takes.”

Emily returned with a tube of lotion specifically for the hives, handing it to Luke. “This should help soothe the itching and reduce the redness,” she explained. “Apply it gently and make sure to cover all the affected areas.”

“Thanks, Emily,” Luke said, taking the lotion. He turned to Jess, who was still lying on the bed, trying to find some comfort.

Luke approached Jess with the lotion, but Jess yanked it from his hand, determination flaring in his eyes. “I can do it myself,” he muttered, struggling to sit up.

Luke watched as Jess awkwardly tried to apply the lotion to his chest and arms, wincing as he reached the more painful areas. Jess’s movements were slow and shaky, clearly uncomfortable.

After a few minutes of watching Jess struggle, Luke couldn't take it anymore. “Jess, let me help you with your back,” he said gently, trying to keep the frustration out of his voice.

Jess glared at him for a moment, pride and stubbornness battling against the obvious need for assistance. Finally, he sighed heavily, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “Fine,” he muttered, handing the lotion back to Luke. “But just my back.”

Luke smiled sympathetically and moved closer. “Alright, just your back.” He squeezed a generous amount of lotion into his hands and began to apply it to Jess’s back with careful, gentle strokes, mindful of the sensitive areas.

Jess flinched initially but soon relaxed under Luke’s touch, the cooling sensation of the lotion providing some much-needed relief. Luke worked methodically, ensuring every inch of Jess’s back was covered.

“Feel better?” Luke asked softly once he was done.

Jess nodded. “Yeah, a bit. Thanks, Luke.”

Luke gave Jess’s shoulder a reassuring pat. “Anytime, kid.”

Emily followed the two with a small smile on her face. She checked Jess’s vitals once more. “If you’re comfortable enough, it would be better to leave the shirt off for a while, just so that we can better see the progression of the hives”, she said gently.

Because who didn’t like appearing half-naked in front of their uncle and medical staff? Jess nodded anyway, not wanting to make their job any harder than it already was.

“Get some rest now. We’ll be checking on you regularly.” With that, Emily left the room and the two men were left alone. Luke helped Jess to get comfortable as the boy turned on his side and hissed as his sensitive skin made contact with the sheets. “You’re doing great kid.”

Jess was sick of the meaningless words of encouragement. He just wanted the pain to be gone and not to have to deal with all this crap. “No, I’m not Luke. It’s pretty damn clear. I’m covered in red hives in a fucking isolation room. Doesn’t sound that great to me”, he snapped.

“Hey, no need to get snappy. I’m just trying to help you”, Luke was taken back by Jess’s reaction. He would have expected something similar from the Jess who had just moved to Stars Hollow and hated anything and everything but he had thought that the kid would be over that phase already. Obviously, the pain brought out the worst in people.

“I’m not being snappy. I’m being a fucking realist. My situation isn’t great and I’m not dealing with it all that well either. Nothing about this is great.”

Luke took a deep breath, trying to keep his frustration in check. He knew Jess was going through hell, but the constant negativity was starting to wear on him. “Look, Jess, I get it. This sucks. It really does. But lashing out at me isn’t going to make it any better.”

Jess turned his head away, staring at the wall. “You don’t get it, Luke. You have no idea what this feels like.”

“I know I don’t,” Luke admitted, his voice softening. “But I’m here for you, trying to make it a little less unbearable. Can you cut me some slack?”

Jess’s shoulders tensed, and for a moment, Luke thought he might lash out again. Instead, Jess sighed deeply, the fight seeming to drain out of him. “I’m sorry,” he muttered. “I just… I hate this.”

Luke sat down on the edge of the bed, placing a hand on Jess’s arm. “I know you do, kid. And you have every right to be angry. But don’t push away the people who are trying to help you. We’re all in this together, remember?”

Jess nodded, still not looking at Luke. “Yeah, I remember,” he repeated quietly.

Luke squeezed his arm gently. “Good. Now, let’s get through this one step at a time. We’ll figure it out, okay?”

Jess finally turned to look at him, his eyes tired but a little less hostile. “Okay,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

Luke gave him a small smile. “Alright. Try to get some rest. I’ll be right here if you need anything.”

Jess nodded again, and Luke helped him settle back down, adjusting the sheets to avoid irritating the hives. Jess closed his eyes, exhaustion pulling him back toward sleep.

Luke watched him for a moment, his frustration melting into concern. He knew he shouldn’t get frustrated at the kid. He was going through the worst time in his life, and he didn’t need people getting mad at him on top of everything else. He needed to cut Jess some slack as well.

Not long after Jess fell asleep, Luke felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. It was Lorelai. “Heyy, I know we saw you this morning but Rory and I were just wondering how everything’s gone in the new ward and how Jess is doing”, Lorelai’s less enthusiastic than normally voice came from the other line.

“Jess is, well, surviving. He had an allergic reaction to the new chemo. He has bad hives all over his body, but they’re starting to fade. He’s sleeping now”, Luke spoke quietly so as to not wake up the boy.

Luke could practically hear Lorelai’s frown from the phone. “Aww no, poor kid. Nothing’s going his way is it?”

“Yeah, he was pretty bummed about it.”

“And how’re you doing in there?” Lorelai asked.

“Oh, I’m fine. I can’t complain. I’m not the one getting poison pumped into my body. I can go outside to get fresh air when the walls start closing in. Jess doesn’t have that luxury.”

Lorelai sighed on the other end of the line. “I know, Luke. It’s just... hard to see him like this. He’s always been such a tough kid, and now...”

“Yeah, I know,” Luke agreed, rubbing his forehead wearily. “But we’ll get through this. He’ll get through this.”

There was a brief pause before Lorelai spoke again, her voice softer. “We miss him already. It’s not the same without him around.”

Luke nodded, even though she couldn’t see him. “I know. But once he gets through this, he’ll be back. Stronger than ever.”

“Yeah,” Lorelai said, a bit more resolutely. “You’re right. He will be. Give him our love, okay?”

“I will. Thanks for checking in,” Luke replied, glancing over at Jess, who was still sleeping soundly. “I’ll call you if anything changes.”

“Alright. Hang in there, Luke. We’re rooting for him,” Lorelai said before they hung up.

Luke slipped his phone back into his pocket and took a deep breath. He looked at Jess, who was still frowning in his sleep, and felt a pang of sadness. It wasn’t fair that he had to go through this. Jess was just a kid. God how Luke hated cancer and what it was doing to his nephew.

A soft knock on the door brought him out of his thoughts. Emily stepped in, her expression one of concern. “How’s he doing?”

“He’s sleeping,” Luke replied. “The hives are starting to fade, but he’s still pretty miserable.”

Emily nodded, glancing at Jess. “We’ll keep a close eye on him. If he has any more reactions, we’ll adjust his treatment immediately.”

“Thanks, Emily,” Luke said. “I appreciate it.”

Emily gave him a reassuring smile before leaving the room. Luke sat back down in the chair beside Jess’s bed, watching him sleep. He hoped that the worst was over, but that was probably not true.

As the hours passed, Luke stayed by Jess’s side, occasionally checking his phone for updates from Lorelai and Rory. He dozed off now and then, but always woke up at the slightest sound, ready to help Jess if he needed anything.

Later in the evening, Dr. Parker came in to check on Jess. The boy was still asleep, his face pressed against the pillow.

"How's he doing?" Dr. Parker asked in a hushed tone as he approached the bed.

"He’s been sleeping on and off," Luke replied, closing his book. "The hives have calmed down, but he’s still been restless."

Dr. Parker nodded and leaned over to gently touch Jess’s forehead. He could feel the slight warmth and frowned. “He has a slight fever,” he observed, pulling out a digital thermometer to get an accurate reading.

The thermometer beeped after a few seconds, confirming a low-grade fever. Dr. Parker made a note in Jess's chart. "We'll keep monitoring his temperature closely. Fevers are common during treatment, but we need to make sure it doesn't escalate."

Luke’s expression was a mix of concern and weariness. “Is there anything else we can do for him?”

“For now, we’ll continue with the antihistamines to keep the hives under control, and we’ll administer some acetaminophen to help with the fever,” Dr. Parker explained. “It’s important to keep him hydrated as well, so encourage him to drink water when he wakes up.”

Luke nodded, absorbing the information. "Got it. Is the fever something to worry about right now?"

"It's not unusual," Dr. Parker reassured him. "But we need to be vigilant. If it gets worse, we'll need to run some tests to ensure there's no underlying infection."

Dr. Parker then checked the IV lines and made sure everything was functioning correctly. He noted Jess’s vitals, satisfied that there were no immediate red flags other than the fever.

"You're doing a great job here, Luke," Dr. Parker said, patting his shoulder. "Having you here makes a big difference for Jess."

Luke gave a small smile, though his eyes were still heavy with worry. “Thanks, Doc. I just wish there was more I could do.”

“Being here is the most important thing,” Dr. Parker said kindly. “Keep doing what you’re doing. Jess needs all the support he can get.”

As Dr. Parker left the room, Luke looked back at Jess, his heart aching for his nephew. He knew the road ahead was still long and filled with uncertainty, but he was determined to stay strong for Jess, to be the anchor in the storm.

Jess stirred slightly, his eyes fluttering open. Luke quickly moved closer, gently touching his arm. “Hey, you awake?”

Jess nodded weakly, his eyes bleary with sleep. “Yeah... just for a bit.”

“You’ve got a slight fever,” Luke said softly. “Dr. Parker was just here. They’re gonna give you something to help with it.”

“Great,” Jess muttered, his voice hoarse. “Just what I needed, more meds.”

Luke chuckled lightly, trying to lighten the mood. “Well, you know, can’t have too many of those, right?”

Jess managed a faint smile, the corners of his mouth twitching. “Yeah... right.”

“Try to drink some water, okay?” Luke said, handing him a glass. Jess took a few sips, grimacing slightly but obediently drinking.

As Jess settled back into his bed, Luke stayed by his side, watching over him. The battle was far from over, but together, they would face whatever came their way. Jess wasn’t alone, and that made all the difference in the world.

Jess woke up a few times during the night, his skin still irritated but not as painful as before. Luke helped him adjust his position, gave him sips of water, and applied more lotion to the hives. Jess was quieter, not as sarcastic as before, but his eyes still held a glimmer of determination.

In the early hours of the morning, as the first light of dawn began to filter through the blinds, Jess finally seemed to settle into a deeper sleep. Luke stayed close, his hand resting gently on Jess’s arm, offering silent support.

It was going to be a long and difficult journey, but they would face it together. Luke, Lorelai, Rory, and everyone else who cared about Jess would be there for him, every step of the way. They would give him all the love and support he needed to fight this battle and come out stronger on the other side.

Chapter Text

Jess’s hives had cleared out during the night, providing him some much-needed relief. As the morning light filtered through the window, he felt somewhat better, though his fever was a bit higher. The new chemo seemed to be sitting better with his body so far.

Luke was already up, having slept fitfully in the chair beside Jess’s bed. He rubbed his eyes and stretched, the stiffness in his back a small price to pay for being there for his nephew. He looked over at Jess, who was just beginning to stir.

"Morning, kid," Luke said softly, moving to sit on the edge of the bed.

Jess groaned, blinking against the light. "Morning," he replied, his voice still raspy from sleep. "How long have you been up?"

"A little while," Luke admitted. "You were sleeping pretty soundly, so I didn’t want to wake you."

Jess nodded, shifting slightly under the covers. He could feel the lingering fever in his body, but the absence of the hives was a welcome relief. "The hives are gone," he noted, running a hand over his skin.

"Yeah, they cleared up overnight," Luke confirmed. "How are you feeling otherwise?"

Jess shrugged. "Alright I think. The new chemo hasn’t caused any problems yet."

"That's good to hear," Luke said with a small smile. "You hungry? I can ask the nurses to bring you something."

"Maybe some toast or something light," Jess replied. "I don’t think I can handle anything heavy right now."

Luke nodded and pressed the call button for the nurse. He settled back onto the chair next to the boy’s bed. He eyed his nephew closer. Jess was pale and his cheeks looked hollower than before. The dark circles under his eyes highlighted his paleness and his eyes were a bit red and not fully open.

A nurse came in shortly after, bringing a tray with some toast and a cup of herbal tea. She also checked Jess’s vitals and made a note of his current temperature. "Your fever is still a bit high, but it’s manageable," she said reassuringly. "We’ll keep an eye on it."

Jess nibbled on the toast, taking small bites to avoid upsetting his stomach. Luke sipped on his own cup of coffee, the warm liquid providing a small comfort in the sterile hospital room.

"So, any plans for today?" Jess asked, his attempt at humor a sign that he was feeling slightly better.

Luke chuckled. "Well, I was thinking we could have a marathon of bad daytime TV. Maybe some infomercials and soap operas?"

Jess smirked. "Sounds like a blast. Maybe we can make fun of the terrible acting."

"Now that’s the spirit," Luke said with a grin. "We’ll make it through this, one bad soap opera at a time."

The morning passed slowly, but the small moments of normalcy helped to ease the tension. Jess’s fever remained steady, and he continued to tolerate the new chemo. Dr. Parker visited him as well and he was pleased to see that the chemo seemed to be working better for Jess this time. He assured Luke that the fever was quite a normal side effect, and they shouldn’t have to be too worried.

After a few hours of shitty TV shows, Jess fell asleep again. Luke adjusted his bed into a more horizontal position and watched his nephew sleep soundly. It was clear how much of a toll the treatment had already taken on Jess. He couldn’t make it through the day without at least two naps and he slept over fourteen hours every night. This was another side effect that worried Luke but Dr. Parker was there to calm down his nerves again, saying that it was very normal for patients to be tired. Even as tired as Jess.

Luke tried to pass the time by pacing around the room, watching reruns of the same old TV shows and he even attempted to read one of Jess’s novels. He barely understood any of it though and it only strengthened the idea that his nephew was a genius.

On the other hand, Luke quite liked just sitting there, not doing anything. With his own business to run, there was rarely a moment of peace where he didn’t need to be doing something. It was always remember to order that and call here and clean this. Here he didn’t need to run around like a manic. He just needed to be there for Jess. However, it was sometimes harder than it sounded. Jess wasn’t the easiest to be around when he was grumpy. But Luke forgave him because he knew he’d be just as grumpy if not grumpier if he was in Jess’s position.

Jess woke up again in the afternoon. His old friend, nausea, was back again and he had to work hard to keep down the bit of toast he had managed to eat earlier. He shifted uncomfortably in his bed, feeling the unwelcome return of the queasiness.

Luke, who had been sitting quietly by the window reading a book, noticed Jess stirring and put the book down. "Hey, how’re you feeling?" he asked, his voice full of concern.

Jess shot him a tired, irritated look. "Like crap. How do you think?" he snapped, pressing a hand to his stomach as if to will the nausea away.

Luke sighed, trying to keep his patience. He knew Jess was struggling, and it was making him irritable. "I know, kid. I’m just checking in on you."

"Well, don’t. There’s nothing you can do about it," Jess grumbled, closing his eyes as if that would help him escape the relentless discomfort.

Luke stood up and approached the bed, unsure of how to help but determined to try. "I know this sucks, but you don’t have to go through it alone. I’m here, okay?"

”Yeah yeah yeah. Still, I’m the only one here stuck to a hospital bed”, Jess said and rolled his eyes. He wasn’t in the mood for the ‘we’re in this together’ crap.

Luke sighed. He didn’t want to be irritated at the boy, so he decided to ignore his little comment. "How about we take a walk around the room? Might help a bit with the nausea."

Jess looked at him skeptically. "A walk around the room? Really?"

"Yeah, sometimes moving a bit can help," Luke suggested. "Plus, it’s something to do other than lying here feeling miserable."

Jess considered it for a moment before reluctantly agreeing. "Fine, but don’t expect me to do laps."

"Deal," Luke said with a small smile.

Jess gripped the edge of the bed and tried to push himself up, but his muscles felt weak and uncooperative. Seeing him struggle, Luke stepped in, placing one hand on Jess's back and the other under his arm to offer support.

He slowly helped Jess into a sitting position, making sure not to move too quickly and exacerbating the nausea. Jess’s face was pinched with discomfort, but he managed to stay upright.

"You okay?" Luke asked, scanning Jess's face for any signs of dizziness or pain.

"Yeah, just...give me a second," Jess replied, taking a few deep breaths to steady himself.

"Alright. When you’re ready, we’ll swing your legs over the side of the bed," Luke instructed. He kept his hand on Jess's back, providing a steadying presence. Jess nodded, signaling he was ready. With Luke's help, he slowly moved his legs, letting them dangle over the edge of the bed.

"Good job," Luke encouraged. "Now, let’s get you standing. I’ll be right here, so don’t worry."

Jess gripped the bed tightly as he attempted to stand. His legs felt shaky, and he wobbled slightly. Luke was quick to react, wrapping an arm around Jess's waist and offering his other arm for additional support. "Lean on me if you need to," Luke said, his voice calm and reassuring.

With Luke's help, Jess managed to get to his feet. He swayed a bit, but Luke’s strong hold kept him steady. "You good?" Luke asked, peering at Jess with concern.

"Yeah, I’m okay," Jess said, though his voice was tinged with frustration. He felt so pathetic, needing so much help just to stand up. It was humiliating. But he knew Luke wouldn’t judge him. Luke wouldn’t laugh or mock him for being weak.

"Alright, let’s take it slow. One step at a time," Luke instructed. He stayed close to Jess, his arm still around his waist. With his other hand, he gently guided Jess’s hand to rest on his shoulder for extra balance.

They took the first step together, Luke matching Jess’s hesitant pace. "That’s it. Just keep moving," Luke encouraged. Jess grimaced with each step, but he kept going, his determination evident.

As they made their way around the room, Luke continued to offer words of encouragement. "You’re doing great, Jess. Just a few more steps."

Jess’s breathing was labored, and he was sweating from the effort, but he kept pushing forward. "I feel like I’m walking through molasses," he muttered, his voice strained.

"I know it’s tough, but you’re doing awesome," Luke replied, his tone unwaveringly supportive.

After a few minutes, they completed their slow circuit around the room. Jess was visibly exhausted, his legs trembling from the effort. "Let’s get you back to bed," Luke said gently. He guided Jess back to the bed, helping him sit down carefully before easing him into a lying position

"See? Not so bad," Luke said encouragingly.

"Yeah, yeah," Jess grumbled, but there was a hint of gratitude in his eyes.

Jess was just about to doze off when Emily came into his room. She smiled at them and gently placed a hand on Jess’s shoulder wake him. “Hey Jess. I have something for you”, she said and handed Jess a piece of paper folded over.

Jess rubbed his eyes and yawned before taking the paper from Emily. “What is it?” he asked instead of opening it.

“Somebody wanted to send you a letter”, she said with a soft smile.

Jess looked at her suspiciously but opened the paper anyway. Inside, there was a letter written in childlike writing. It read:

 To: Jess

From: Anna

Hi Jess!

I miss you. Emily said you were moved to a different place, but she wouldn’t to tell me where. Please tell me where you are so me and mommy can visit you. I drew a really nice picture for you, and I can’t wait to show you. I’ve been doing good and the doctor told me I can go home soon! I miss home so much and I’m really excited. I miss my dog and my little brother but I’ll also miss seeing you. You’re really nice. Please write me back soon.

Jess smiled wider than he had in a while. The letter from the six-year-old girl was heartwarming and Jess immediately ripped paper from his notebook to write her a letter back.

To: Anna

From: Jess

Hey Anna,

Thank you for your letter. I was moved to the isolation ward to get stronger treatment and I’ll be here for a while. I would love to have you visit me and see your drawing. I’m happy to hear you’re doing better and can go home. I often miss home too. And I’ll miss you once you leave. You’re really nice too, Anna. I wish you’ll stay healthy. I hope you’re having a good day and I look forward to your visit

Emily was checking Jess’s vitals while he wrote the letter. "How are you feeling, Jess?" she asked softly, her eyes flicking to the numbers on the monitor.

Jess didn't look up from his letter. "Still a bit like a human furnace, but at least it’s not getting any worse," he replied dryly.

Emily smiled slightly, appreciating his attempt at humor. "Your temperature is still a bit high, but it’s stable. That's a good sign."

Jess nodded, though he seemed more engrossed in his writing than in the conversation. Emily noted his pulse, blood pressure, and oxygen levels, all while keeping an eye on his overall demeanor. She was glad to see him engaged in writing. It showed that he still had some energy left in him.

Once Jess was finished, he folded the paper and handed it to Emily. “Can you give this to Anna?” he asked, looking up at her.

“Of course. I’ll be your personal letter owl”, she chuckled and took the paper.

“Thanks.”

Emily finished the check-up and patted Jess on the shoulder. She left the room with the usual “I’ll be back later” and “Just press the button if you need anything.”

“So, who’s this Anna?” Luke asked after a while.

Jess realized that Luke had never met her. “She’s another patient here. I met her once and we’ve been visiting back and forth a bit.”

Luke raised his eyebrows a bit. “She’s six, Luke”, Jess said as he noticed the questioning look on his uncle’s face. The older man chuckled at that.

“Right. Well, that sounds nice”, he commented.

Jess tried to get more comfortable on the bed. He thought that another nap wouldn’t hurt and he lay down, pulling the blanket over himself. His eyelids felt heavy, and within moments, he drifted off into a light sleep, the steady rhythm of his breathing the only sound in the room.

Luke watched Jess for a few minutes, ensuring he was settled before deciding to stretch his legs. The room felt small and suffocating after hours of sitting and watching Jess sleep. He needed a break, a breath of fresh air, even if it was just for a few minutes.

Quietly, Luke slipped out of the room and walked down the sterile, fluorescent-lit hallways of the hospital. He nodded to a few nurses and other staff members he recognized, offering polite but tired smiles. The hospital had become a second home in recent weeks, and he was grateful for the staff’s support and kindness.

Reaching the entrance, Luke pushed open the door and stepped outside into the fresh air. It was a cool, crisp afternoon, the sky a bright blue with a few fluffy clouds scattered across it. He took a deep breath, feeling the tension in his shoulders ease slightly as he inhaled the clean, cool air.

Luke wandered over to a small bench in the courtyard and sat down. He rubbed his temples, trying to clear his mind. He was exhausted, both mentally and physically, but he couldn't show it. Jess needed him to be strong, to be a rock he could rely on.

Luke pulled out his phone and sent a quick text to Lorelai, updating her on Jess’s condition and letting her know he’d be back in the room soon. She replied almost immediately, offering words of encouragement and asking him to take care of himself too. It brought a small smile to his face, knowing they had such a strong support system, even if it felt like they were facing an insurmountable challenge.

After a few more minutes, Luke stood up and took one last deep breath before heading back inside. He made his way through the hospital corridors, his mind more at ease after the brief respite. He walked back into Jess’s room, relieved to find him still asleep, his breathing even and peaceful.

Luke sat back down in the chair beside Jess’s bed, picking up a book he had brought with him. He wasn’t much of a reader, but it helped pass the time and keep his mind occupied. As he read, he kept one eye on Jess, ready to offer comfort and support the moment his nephew needed it.

The hours passed slowly, the ticking of the clock the only measure of time in the quiet room. Despite the exhaustion that gnawed at him, Luke remained vigilant, determined to be there for Jess, no matter what.

Jess woke up to the soft sound of his phone vibrating on the table next to his bed. He blinked his eyes open, the light in the room feeling harsh after his nap. Reaching over, he saw Rory's name flashing on the screen. He answered the call and brought the phone to his ear.

"Hey," he mumbled, his voice still groggy from sleep.

"Hey, sleepyhead," Rory’s cheerful voice came through the phone, a stark contrast to the sterile silence of the hospital room. "Guess what I just did?"

Jess managed a small smile. "What did you do?"

"I entered a pie-eating contest," Rory announced, her tone playful.

Jess chuckled softly. "You? A pie-eating contest? I thought you were more of a bookworm than a competitive eater."

"Well, I figured I’d branch out," she replied, laughter in her voice. "Plus, I thought it might be fun. And guess what? I actually won."

Jess raised an eyebrow. "You won? How many pies did you eat?"

"Six," Rory said proudly. "I’m pretty sure I’ll never look at another blueberry pie the same way again, but it was worth it."

Jess laughed again, the sound surprising even himself. "I wish I could’ve seen that."

"Me too," Rory said, her voice softening. "I miss you."

"I miss you too," Jess admitted. He took a deep breath, trying to keep his emotions in check. "So, what else is new in Stars Hollow?"

Rory launched into a detailed account of the latest town meeting, complete with Taylor's usual antics and Kirk's latest scheme to start a pet-sitting business. Jess listened, a small smile on his face, grateful for the distraction.

“Mom and I are gonna come see you tomorrow. Prepare to be amazed”, Rory said with a hint of mystery in her voice.

“Amazed? By what?” Jess chuckled.

“You’ll see.”

“It could be anything, knowing you two. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was a porcelain doll with frog’s legs and horse’s head.”

“Oh yeah, because that would keep you entertained and make you feel all cozy in there”, Rory laughed.

“It might. I’d be creeped out, but maybe that’s your plan anyway. To make me so scared I wouldn’t feel any pain.”

Rory smiled but the mention of pain got her serious again. “Are you in pain?” she asked with more concern in her voice.

Jess sighed, a bit disappointed that their light-hearted chatter had steered into a more serious conversation. It seemed to happen a lot lately. “Not too bad yet. Just a bit nauseous and I had a temperature earlier. I think it’s gone now though.”

“Okay. That’s good then.”

They talked for a while longer, Rory’s stories and anecdotes bringing a sense of normalcy to Jess’s hospital room. For a brief moment, he could almost forget about the pain and the fear, losing himself in the familiar comfort of Rory’s voice.

When they finally hung up, Jess felt a little lighter, the weight of his situation a bit easier to bear. He set his phone down and looked over at Luke, who had been quietly sitting in the corner, a knowing smile on his face.

"Rory?" Luke asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah," Jess said, leaning back against his pillows. "She entered a pie-eating contest and won."

Luke chuckled. "That sounds like something she’d do."

"Yeah," Jess agreed, feeling a warmth in his chest that he hadn’t felt in a long time. "It really does."

As the night settled outside the hospital, Jess and Luke were getting ready for bed. Luke helped Jess to walk to the bathroom. He brushed his teeth and ran a washcloth around his body to freshen up a bit. He was too tired to shower, standing up for more than two minutes at a time seemed too daunting of a task.

He tried to avoid looking in the mirror for too long because he didn’t like what he saw. He didn’t like seeing how his shoulders had narrowed or the way his face was gaunt.

The walk back to his bed was slow but he managed to do it on his own, which gave him a sense of accomplishment. Luke watched Jess walk from nearby, ready to catch him if he fell. They didn’t need Jess getting the fall risk bracelet again.

“You need anything?” Luke asked him as he was getting comfortable on the bed.

Jess shook his head, his eyes already drooping as exhaustion overtook him. His own bedding still smelt faintly of home, which was comforting in the sterile room.

“Goodnight kid. I’ll be here if you need me.”

The night was going peacefully until it wasn’t anymore. Jess was lost in a fevered nightmare, unable to escape the traumatic scenes from his childhood. He found himself in one of the shitty apartments he used to live in. The air was thick with the stench of alcohol and cigarette smoke. The walls seemed to close in on him as voices echoed around, angry and slurred. He saw his stepfather, face twisted in rage, lunging at him. “Come here you bastard”, came the yell filled with anger. Jess tried to run, but his feet felt like they were stuck in quicksand. He felt a big hand grabbing his collar from behind and then the hands snaked up to his neck, stopping him from breathing.

He was gasping for a breath, but he couldn’t get anything in. He was panicking and his stepfather was still yelling at him in a drunken voice. His stepfather's taunts, the smell of stale beer, the sound of bottles shattering—all merged into a cacophony that overwhelmed his senses. He felt hands grabbing at him, pulling him back into the darkness.

Suddenly, it all stopped. He woke up with a violent start, gasping for breath. He was surprised when he could breathe again. He was frantically looking around the room. A relief washed over him when the big drunken man was nowhere to be seen.

Luke was looking at him like he had grown a second head. Obviously, Jess didn’t know that he had been trashing around on his bed and Luke had been trying to wake him up for several minutes.

"Jess, it’s okay. You were having a nightmare," he said, trying to not only calm Jess down but also himself. He was really freaked out by Jess’s violent nightmare even though he didn’t even know what it was about. But it was scary watching his nephew in a trance-like state with no way of getting through to him.

Jess shivered, drenched in sweat. "Luke?" he croaked, his voice hoarse. Luke was safe. Luke wasn’t one of those angry pricks that hit him the second a drop of alcohol touched their lips. Luke never hit him.

"You're burning up, kid," Luke said, concern etched in his voice. He was feeling Jess’s forehead with his hand and the heat radiating from the boy was worrying. The poor kid was still gasping for air, and he was visibly shaking.

Jess tried to sit up, but his body felt weak and uncooperative. Luke put a hand on his back and noticed Jess’s shirt was soaked. He pressed the call button.

“Let’s get you cleaned up,” Luke said gently, helping Jess to sit upright. He unbuttoned Jess’s shirt, the fabric clinging to his skin. “We’ll take it slow, okay?”

Jess nodded, too tired to argue. Luke carefully slipped the shirt off, trying to avoid causing any discomfort. “Hold on to me,” Luke instructed, offering his arm for support as he helped Jess stand and move to the bathroom.

Jess leaned heavily on Luke, his legs trembling. Luke grabbed a washcloth, dampened it with warm water, and began to gently wipe Jess’s face and neck. The cool water was a relief, and Jess closed his eyes, allowing himself to relax a bit.

Julie entered the room and saw the two men in the bathroom. She could immediately tell that Jess wasn’t doing good. “Hey dear. Everything okay here?” she asked them.

“He feels really hot to touch and he sweated through his shirt and sheets”, Luke explained while supporting Jess.

Julie nodded. “I’ll change the sheets. Just hold on a bit longer, hon.” Jess nodded weakly.

“You’re doing great, kid,” Luke said softly, continuing to wash Jess’s chest and back. The washcloth moved over his feverish skin, wiping away the sweat and grime. Jess shivered slightly as the cool air hit his damp skin, but he felt a bit more refreshed.

Once Luke had finished, he grabbed a clean shirt and helped Jess put it on. The fabric was soft and dry, a welcome change from the sweat-soaked one. “Feel a little better?” Luke asked, leading Jess to the armchair while Julie was working on changing the sheets. Jess nodded again.

“I’ll inform Dr. Parker and come back with some meds for you, okay sweetie?” Julie said as Jess was settled back on the bed.

Jess nodded, too exhausted to reply. He watched Julie leave the room, then turned his attention to Luke, who was straightening up the blankets around him.

“Sorry for being a pain in the ass”, he said quietly.

Luke looked at the boy sharply. “Hey, none of that. You’re not a pain in anything. You’re sick”, he declared as he kept eye contact with the boy.  “You understand?”

Jess nodded but avoided eye contact.

He sighed, leaning back into the pillows. The fresh sheets and clean shirt did make him feel a bit better, but the fever still made his body ache, and the nightmare had left him feeling shaken. He closed his eyes, trying to push the lingering fear away.

A few minutes later, Julie returned with a small tray. She had a glass of water and a couple of pills. “Here we go, Jess,” she said softly, setting the tray on the bedside table. “These should help with the fever and help you get some rest.”

Jess took the pills with a grateful nod, swallowing them with a sip of water. He handed the glass back to Julie, who gave him a warm smile. “Try to get some sleep, dear. We’ll keep a close eye on you.”

As Julie left the room, Jess settled back into the bed. Luke reached over and squeezed his shoulder. “I’m right here if you need anything,” he said.

Jess nodded, feeling a bit more at ease. He closed his eyes, letting the medication take effect. The room gradually became a bit hazy, the pain and fever starting to dull. He felt himself drifting off, the comfort of Luke’s presence grounding him.

Jess slept fitfully through the night, his rest interrupted by fever dreams and moments of discomfort. Luke stayed by his side, ready to help whenever Jess stirred. When morning finally came, Jess was exhausted but grateful to see the sunlight filtering through the window.

Around mid-morning, there was a soft knock on the door, and Luke looked up to see Lorelai and Rory entering the room. Their faces lit up with smiles as they saw Jess awake. Luke excused himself to get coffee and stretch his legs as Jess was only allowed two visitors at a time.

"Hey there, sleepyhead," Rory greeted, her voice warm and cheerful. She was carrying a large bag overflowing with various items.

"It’s like we have to go through a screening to get to see you now”, Lorelai chuckled. She had another bag slung over her shoulder.

Jess managed a small smile, his eyes lighting up a bit at the sight of them. "Yeah, it’s to make sure you don’t try to slip in anything inappropriate”, he croaked, his voice still weak from the night before.

“Oh, we would never”, Lorelai said fake offended. “We did bring you something though”, she continued with a smirk. Rory put down the bag at the foot of the bed and Lorelai reached in for the first item. It was a framed photo of him and Rory at Jess’s party. It was a candid that Kirk had taken. The two of them stood in front of the window at Luke’s, whispering something to each other’s ear with a smile on their faces.

“Something to remember me by”, Rory smiled as she handed the photo to Jess for closer inspection. Jess had never seen it before, but it perfectly captured the vibe at the party. He smiled fondly at the memory. “Thanks, it’s great.”

Rory walked closer to the bed and kissed Jess’s cheek. Jess pulled her closer and kissed her lips. God how he had missed her.

“Hey, hey don’t get carried away. There’s still loads of stuff to go through. You can be all cutesy once we’re done”, Lorelai scolded them playfully.

Rory blushed and walked back over to her mother. Lorelai pulled out a new item from the bag. It was a brown teddy bear with hospital pyjamas on it, clearly meant for sick kids to feel better about themselves. Jess laughed out loud when he saw it.

“So, this is Mr. Cuddles and he has leukemia like you. You can tell him all your worries and he understands you. And you can cuddle him when you feel lonely”, Lorelai narrated and threw the bear at Jess, who caught it in his arms. The bear was soft and Jess held it in his hands for a while before tucking the bear next to his pillow.

“Wow really? He is just like me, mommy”, Jess said in a childish voice that made both the Gilmore girls laugh.

“That’s right darling”, Lorelai played along.

Rory found it only a bit weird how her mom was pretending to be her boyfriend’s mom. But she knew it was all in good fun and she continued their showcase of comforting items for Jess. Next, she revealed a small portable DVD player and a few of Jess’s favorite movies to keep him entertained. On top of that, they also gave him an MP3 player, a few new books, a deck of playing cards for games and magic tricks that Jess liked to do sometimes, and a fluffy blanket to keep him warm.

Jess’s smile widened as he looked at the assortment of gifts. "You guys didn't have to do all this," he said, though his gratitude was clear in his eyes.

"Of course we did," Rory said, sitting down on the edge of the bed. "We want to make sure you have everything you need to stay comfortable and entertained. I know it’ll be really tough to stay in the same tiny room for weeks on end.” She had her hand on Jess’s arm, and she was slowly brushing it up and down.

“How are you doing now?” Lorelai asked him gently.

Jess shrugged, trying to put on a brave face. "Better than last night”, he said nonchalantly. It was his third day on hard chemo and it was really starting to weigh down on him.

“How crappy did you feel last night?” Rory asked him.

“Really crappy. But I’m alright now, just pretty tired”, he said, trying to relieve their concern for him.

“We’ll try to be quiet if you want to nap”, Lorelai said with a slight smile.

“You? Quiet? Oh please.”

“He knows me well”, she laughed and patted Jess on the shoulder. “But seriously, if you want to sleep, just go for it, kid. We know you need it.”

Rory was gently brushing his cheek with her hand and Jess’s eyes were already starting to droop at her soft touch. “Maybe for a bit”, he whispered as a yawn struck through him.

The girls smiled as they watched Jess drift to sleep in a matter of seconds. “Damn, I wish I could sleep that easy. Sometimes I toss and turn for hours”, Lorelai spoke out quietly but Rory still shushed her, afraid that she’d wake up the exhausted boy. But truth to be told, not even an orchestra playing right next door would wake Jess up now.

Lorelai excused herself to go find Luke and Rory was left alone with the sleeping boy. She gently brushed his cheek with her hand and tried not to think about how hollow his cheeks were. She tried not to notice the way his collarbones were looking sharper than before from the collar of his shirt or the way the shirt had become so loose on the boy again.

Rory sat in silence, just watching as Jess’s chest moved up and down peacefully as he slept. It was almost hypnotizing to watch. It lulled her into deeper thoughts. Rory was mourning the summer she should have spent with Jess, taking road trips and exploring new places while enjoying the last summer before Rory went off to college. They had lost the last summer they were allowed to be kids. Sure, Rory could still do those things, but she didn’t want to. She would feel wrong not doing them with Jess.

She was pulled out of her thoughts when the door opened and Julie stepped in, wearing a protective gown and a mask. She could still see her warm smile from behind the mask. “Oh, hi Rory. It’s good to see you”, Julie greeted her.

“Hi, Julie. I wished I could say it’s good to be here”, Rory answered with a sad smile as her eyes wondered back to Jess’s sleeping face.

Julie moved closer to the bed. “I understand the circumstance isn’t the best”, she said empathetically. “It’s incredibly tough to constantly worry about a loved one so much.”

Rory agreed quietly. Julie continued to perform a routine check-up on Jess. She gently stretched the collar of his shirt to check the site of his port and then moved to take his temperature and read the monitors. “He seems to be doing alright now. His fever is down, and his vitals are stable.”

“That’s good, then”, Rory commented.

“Yes, he is doing better than expected at this point. He’s a strong kid”, Julie said proudly.

“But does it mean that he will deteriorate?” Rory asked with concern.

“Not necessarily, but unfortunately, it is likely. The high dose chemo will cause some more side effects and after the transplant, he will most likely feel pretty bad before his body starts producing new cells”, Julie explained the situation truthfully. She noted the girl’s sorrowful expression. “But he will pull through. I’m sure of it, dear. Like said, Jess is a hell of a fighter.”

“Yeah, I guess he is.”

Luke walked back into the room some time later after Julie had left. Lorelai had to stay outside because of the two visitors at a time rule imposed. He watched the young couple with sadness in his eyes as Rory was gently playing with Jess’s hair, who was still asleep.

“I don’t understand how his dad could’ve ever abandoned him. I’ve seen the baby pictures and he was the cutest baby ever”, Rory said out of the blue which took Luke completely by surprise. He knew Jess wouldn’t like the conversation they were having one bit. But somehow he felt like they had to have it. And it was Rory who started it.

“Well, sometimes cuteness isn’t enough to make someone stay. Jimmy was never fit for a father anyway. He was the least responsible guy I’ve ever met.”

“Do you ever talk to Jess about him? Since you knew Jimmy and Jess never met him?”

“No. It’s better he doesn’t know. He’s better off without that deadbeat scumbag.”

Rory hummed. “I think Jess wants to find him. I let him use my laptop a few times and he had searched up Jimmy’s name”, she said, eyeing Luke’s reaction. “Do you know where he is?”

Luke sighed. “No. I haven’t heard from him since he left. But I guess I cannot keep him from trying to find the guy if he truly wants to.”

"Maybe it's something he needs to do for himself," Rory suggested softly, glancing over at Jess, who was resting fitfully. "I mean, knowing where he came from might help him figure out where he's going."

Luke frowned, the lines on his forehead deepening. "Yeah, but what if finding Jimmy just opens up old wounds? Jess has been through enough already. He doesn't need more disappointment."

"Maybe," Rory acknowledged, "but he might also find some closure. Or at least some answers. And I think he's strong enough to handle whatever he finds."

Luke sighed again, his shoulders slumping a bit. "I just want to protect him, you know? He's been through so much already. Seeing him like this, going through this hell... it's hard to think about anything else."

Rory placed a comforting hand on Luke's arm. "I know. And you're doing everything you can, Luke. You're here for him, and that means a lot. But maybe it's time to let him decide for himself."

Luke nodded reluctantly. "Yeah, maybe you're right. I'll talk to him about it when he's feeling a bit better."

But Luke didn’t know when that day would come. According to what Dr. Parker and the nurses were saying, Jess would start feeling worse by the day. And Luke wasn’t sure if he could handle it. But he knew he had to. For the boy’s sake who was lying on the hospital bed, enduring everything. Luke had to remind himself that no matter how scared he was or how bad he felt, Jess was feeling about a hundred times worse. It wasn’t a comforting thought, but it was a thought that kept him strong.

Chapter Text

The last days before Jess’s transplant were pure agony. Any moment that Jess wasn’t asleep, he was in pain. It was more pain than he had ever felt before, more pain that he thought was even possible. He was prescribed morphine for the pain and even that just helped to ease up the pain for a bit but not to take it away completely. His nausea was relentless and his appetite gone. Jess spent about 22 hours a day sleeping, only waking up for small moments here and there, and even then, he wasn’t fully aware of his surroundings.

Luke sat by Jess’s bed, day and night. He watched Jess sleep, his face pale and sunken, dark circles etched under his eyes. Every now and then, a small moan of pain would escape Jess’s lips, and it broke Luke’s heart a little more each time.

In those rare moments when Jess was awake, he was barely coherent, the morphine fogging his mind. Luke would try to talk to him, offer him sips of water or a spoonful of soup, but Jess was too weak and too nauseated to manage more than a few sips before he drifted back into a restless sleep.

Luke had never felt so scared or so helpless in his life. He was used to fixing things, solving problems with his hands or his quick thinking. But this… this was something he couldn’t fix. All he could do was be there, offering silent support, hoping that somehow his presence made a difference.

Luke’s world had shrunk to the size of Jess’s hospital room, every moment revolving around his nephew’s fragile state. He had never felt so scared, but he knew he had to stay strong—for Jess, for Rory, for everyone who loved the boy lying in that bed.

Rory felt equally scared as she visited Jess a day before the transplant. Jess was sprawled on the bed as he had trashed around, the sheets tangled up in his limbs. She climbed on the edge of the bed and gently pulled Jess’s head into her lap. She leaned down to kiss his temple and buried her fingers into his scalp, hoping to bring even a tiny bit of comfort to the boy in distress.

Jess's eyes fluttered open at her touch, and he looked up at her with a mix of confusion and relief. "Rory," he whispered, his voice barely audible. He was breathing heavy, and he held his breath every time a rush of pain washed over him. Rory put her other hand on his chest while the other still remained in his dark mess of hair.

“Hi baby”, she greeted him softly. “Just take it easy. I’m right here”, she soothed him.

He tried to smile, but it quickly turned into a grimace as another wave of pain washed over him. Rory felt her heart clench, wishing she could take away his suffering. "I'm so tired," he murmured, his eyes closing again.

"I know," she said softly. "Just rest.”

As Jess drifted in and out of sleep, Rory continued to stroke his hair, humming softly to him. She felt his body tense up and soften again whenever his consciousness waned enough for him to forget about the pain.

Luke returned with a cup of coffee in hand, pausing in the doorway as he saw the scene before him. Rory glanced up, offering him a small, sad smile. "He was in a lot of pain," she explained quietly. "I thought this might help."

Luke nodded, setting the coffee down and taking a seat on the other side of the bed. "You're doing great, Rory. He needs you."

"And he needs you," she replied, her voice steady. "We're all he has right now."

They sat in silence for a while, each lost in their thoughts. The room was dim, the only sound the rhythmic beeping of the machines monitoring Jess's vitals. It was a tense, heavy silence, filled with worry and hope.

“I’m getting the cells drawn from me today”, he told Rory.

“You’re so great for doing this for him”, she said gratefully, still not stopping her comforting acts of care as she stroked the boy’s hair.

Luke nodded, his jaw set in determination. “It’s the least I can do. He’s like a son to me.”

Jess stirred slightly, his head jerking up a bit from Rory’s lap. His eyes were half open and clouded as he tried to make sense of what was happening. Luke moved closer, taking Jess’s hand in his. “Hey, kid. Just wanted to let you know I’m heading out for a bit. They’re going to collect my bone marrow today, so we’re ready for the transplant.”

Jess looked like he didn’t even know where he was, but he nodded slightly. “Oh yeah, the transplant”, he said as Rory twirled his hair around her finger.

“Yeah kid, they’ll do the transplant tomorrow, okay? Then your recovery will start.”

Jess nodded weakly. “I can’t wait to feel better.”

Rory continued to stroke his hair, her touch gentle and soothing. “You will, Jess. This is just one more hurdle to get over.”

Luke squeezed his hand stronger. “Just hang in there a little bit longer, kid. We’re all rooting for you.”

Jess’s eyes fluttered as he tried to stay awake. “I’m trying.”’

Luke squeezed Jess’s hand one more time before standing up. “I’ll be back soon. You rest up, okay?”

As Luke left the room, he felt a pang of anxiety in his chest. Donating bone marrow was a small price to pay for Jess’s recovery, but the uncertainty of the outcome weighed heavily on him. He made his way to the designated room where the medical team was waiting to begin the procedure.

Lorelai was allowed to enter Jess’s room once Luke left, and her heart ached at the scene in front of her. Jess looked so small and so ill, like a small child as Rory held his head on her lap, trying to comfort him. “Hi my darlings”, she greeted them softly.

“Hi mom”, Rory answered.

“How’s our brave boy doing?” Lorelai asked as she approached the bed and reached for Jess’s limp hand. He had managed to fall asleep in between the few seconds that was when Luke left the room and Lorelai entered it.

“He’s in a lot of pain and barely conscious whenever he wakes up”, Rory said, her eyes now lifting from the sleeping boy and searching for comfort in her mother. “I’m so scared for him mom.”

Lorelai sat next to her daughter and wrapped her arm around her shoulder. “I know sweetie. I’m scared too. But Jess is such a tough cookie. He’ll pull through.”

Despite the comforting words from her mother, Rory’s tears still began to fall down her cheeks. She wiped them off so that they wouldn’t fall on the sleeping boy in her lap. It was all too much to handle for her. “I love him so much, mommy. I can’t lose him”, she sobbed.

“Shh, baby, you won’t”, Lorelai tried to comfort her daughter. It hurt her heart to see her sweet baby girl cry. But even more so when there was nothing she could do to fix it. Lorelai tightened her embrace around Rory, stroking her hair soothingly. "You won't lose him, Rory. We’re all here for him, and for each other. We'll get through this together."

Rory sniffled, trying to compose herself. "I know, mom. I just... I can't help but think about what ifs.”

Lorelai nodded, her own eyes misting up. "I know. But he's strong, and he's got a whole team of people who love him and are fighting for him. And with Luke’s bone marrow, he’s got the best chance."

Jess stirred slightly in his sleep, a faint moan escaping his lips. Both women tensed, watching him closely. ”You there, hon?” Lorelai asked quietly and stroked his arm tenderly. Everything had to be so gentle around Jess now.

The boy groaned. He coughed slightly to clear his voice. “I don’t feel good”, Jess croaked, and he lifted his head from Rory’s lap and leaned over the edge of the bed. ”I’m gonna be sick.”

Rory quickly grabbed a small basin and held it under Jess's chin just in time. He retched, his body trembling with the effort. Lorelai rubbed his back gently, whispering soothing words as he emptied his stomach.

"It's okay, Jess. Just let it out," she murmured, her heart aching at the sight of him in such distress.

After a few agonizing moments, Jess finally slumped back against the bed, exhausted and pale. Rory wiped his mouth with a tissue and set the basin aside.

"You did great, Jess," Rory said softly, brushing a damp strand of hair away from his forehead. God she had never been so worried about someone in her life.

"Thanks," he muttered weakly, closing his eyes. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make a mess."

"Don't worry about that," Lorelai said, squeezing his hand. "You're doing the best you can, and that's all that matters."

Jess nodded slightly, but his face was still etched with pain and exhaustion. Rory looked at her mother, worry evident in her eyes.

"Do you want some water, Jess?" Rory asked, hoping to make him feel a bit better.

Jess nodded faintly. Rory carefully lifted a small cup of water to his lips, and he sipped slowly, his throat working to swallow the cool liquid.

"Thanks," he said again, his voice barely above a whisper. He leaned back against the pillows, trying to find a comfortable position. "I hate this."

"I know, kiddo," Lorelai said gently. "But you're doing so well. Just hang in there, okay?" Jess didn't respond, but he gave a slight nod, his eyes already drooping closed again. Lorelai and Rory exchanged a worried glance, their hearts heavy with concern.

"Mom, do you think we should call a nurse?" Rory asked quietly.

Lorelai considered it for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, let's get Julie in here. She might be able to help." Rory pressed the call button, and within minutes, Julie entered the room, her expression kind and professional.

"How's our patient doing?" she asked, moving to Jess's side.

"He's been sick again," Lorelai explained, gesturing to the basin. "And he's really out of it."

Julie nodded, checking Jess's vitals and examining him with a practiced eye. "I'll get him some anti-nausea medication and see if we can make him more comfortable. I’ll check if he’s ready for another dose of morphine as well," she said, giving them a reassuring smile. "You’re doing great, Jess. Just a little more, okay?"

Jess nodded weakly, his eyes barely open. He didn’t really understand what was happening. All he knew was that he was feeling like absolute crap.

Julie returned shortly after with a syringe and a small vial of morphine. She smiled kindly at Jess as she prepared to inject the strong pain reliever into Jess’s IV.

"Alright, Jess, this should help with the pain," she said softly. "It should start to help your pain soon.”

Jess nodded weakly, his body too drained to react much. Julie carefully injected the morphine into his IV line, her movements gentle and precise.  "There you go," she said, capping the syringe and disposing of it properly. "You should start feeling better soon."

Jess closed his eyes, the tension in his body slowly easing as the medication began to take effect. Lorelai and Rory watched him closely, their hearts aching for him. "Thank you, Julie," Lorelai said, her voice filled with gratitude.

"Of course," Julie replied, giving them a reassuring smile. "I know you’re worried about him, but just know that Jess is getting the best care in here and the whole team is working tirelessly to heal Jess.”

As Julie left the room, the atmosphere became quieter, the steady beeping of the machines and Jess's labored breathing the only sounds. Jess's expression softened slightly as the morphine dulled the edge of his pain. Rory continued to stroke his hair, her touch soothing and constant. "Is that better, Jess?" she asked gently.

He nodded, his eyes half-open. "Yeah, a little," he murmured, his voice heavy with exhaustion. "Thanks, Rory."

"Anything for you," she replied, her heart breaking a little more with each passing moment.

Lorelai leaned in and touched Jess’s forehead softly. "Try to get some rest, honey. We're right here."

Jess nodded again, his eyelids fluttering shut. The morphine pulled him into a deeper sleep, his body finally finding a measure of peace.

Rory watched Jess as he drifted back to sleep. She turned to her mother, her eyes reflecting the fear she had been trying to keep at bay. “Mom, it’s so scary,” Rory whispered, her voice trembling. “The pain he’s in… it’s so bad he needs morphine. I’ve never seen anyone in so much pain before.”

Lorelai pulled her daughter into a comforting hug, stroking her back gently. “I know, sweetie. It’s hard to see him like this. But the morphine is helping him, and that’s what’s important right now. He needs to be as comfortable.”

Rory leaned into her mother, seeking solace in her familiar embrace. “I just feel so helpless. I want to take his pain away, but I can’t do anything. I hate seeing him suffer like this.”

Lorelai nodded, her own eyes glistening with unshed tears. “I know, Rory. It’s the worst feeling, not being able to fix things for someone you love. But just being here with him, supporting him, it means the world to Jess. He knows he’s not alone in this.”

Rory sniffled, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. “I just hope he gets better soon. I don’t know how much more of this he can take.”

“He’s strong, Rory. Stronger than we realize. And he’s got us, and Luke, and everyone who loves him. We’re going to get him through this,” Lorelai said firmly, her voice filled with determination.

Rory nodded, drawing strength from her mother’s words. “You’re right. We’ll get through this together.”

They sat in silence for a while, each lost in their thoughts, their hands entwined. The room was filled with a quiet sense of resolve, a determination to stay strong for Jess no matter what challenges lay ahead.

When Luke returned from getting his cells drawn for the transplant, he was visibly tired, but there was a sense of quiet satisfaction in his expression. He paused at the door to Jess's room, taking in the scene before him: Lorelai and Rory sitting close by, their faces a mix of worry and determination, and Jess asleep, finally looking more peaceful.

Luke stepped inside quietly, trying not to disturb the fragile calm. Lorelai looked up and gave him a small smile. “Hey, how’d it go?” she asked softly.

“It went fine,” Luke replied, his voice equally low. “I’m just glad I can do something to help.”

“Should I leave? Since he’s only allowed to have two visitors at a time?” Lorelai asked.

“We can bend the rules for a bit. You two should be heading home soon anyway to get some rest”, Luke answered.

He moved to Jess’s side and gently took his nephew’s hand, squeezing it lightly. Jess stirred slightly at the contact but didn’t wake. Luke sat down, feeling the weight of the past days but also a renewed sense of purpose.

“How’s he doing?” he asked, his eyes not leaving Jess’s face.

“Better now that he’s got some morphine in him,” Rory said. “But it’s been really tough, Luke.”

Luke nodded, his grip on Jess’s hand tightening slightly. “I know. I saw how much pain he was in before I left. But tomorrow’s the day. Tomorrow, we start really fighting back.”

Lorelai reached over and placed a hand on Luke’s shoulder. “You’re doing a great thing, Luke. Jess is lucky to have you.”

Luke shrugged, trying to brush off the praise. “He’s family. You do whatever you can for family.”

The room fell into a comfortable silence, each person lost in their thoughts. Luke’s hand remained clasped around Jess’s, a silent promise of support and love. They knew the road ahead was still uncertain and filled with challenges, but they were ready to face it together.

A few hours after Lorelai and Rory left, Jess woke up again. He groaned, unable to feel anything except the crippling pain in every inch of his body.

“Luke?” Jess called out, but it sounded more like a despite plea. His eyes were too foggy to focus on anything and the dark wasn’t helping him in location his uncle.

Jess’s voice was a strained whisper, barely carrying through the pain that gripped him. The darkness of the room seemed to close in, amplifying his sense of isolation. His heart raced as he tried to move, but the effort only intensified the agony coursing through him.

“Luke?” Jess’s voice cracked, panic edging in.

The stillness of the room was oppressive, and Jess felt a surge of fear. His mind, clouded by pain and medication, raced with anxious thoughts. What if something had happened? What if Luke wasn’t there?

Then, from the corner of his vision, Jess saw a faint movement. He squinted through the haze and made out the shape of Luke, slumped over in a chair beside the bed, his head resting against the armrest.

“Luke!” Jess tried again, his voice desperate now.

The sound of Jess’s panicked call pierced through the fog of sleep that Luke was submerged in. His eyes snapped open, and he jerked upright, instantly alert. He took in the scene with wide eyes, quickly realizing Jess’s distress.

“Jess? What’s wrong?” Luke asked, his voice filled with concern as he scrambled to his feet.

“I… I thought you were gone,” Jess stammered, his voice trembling. The sight of Luke’s familiar face was a small comfort in the overwhelming pain.

Luke rushed to Jess’s side, gently taking his nephew’s hand in his. “I’m here, Jess. I’m right here. I must’ve dozed off. I’m sorry.”

Jess clung to Luke’s hand, his grip weak but firm. “I couldn’t see you. I was scared.”

“I know,” Luke said softly, brushing a damp strand of hair away from Jess’s forehead. He could see the sweat glistening on Jess’s brow, the anguish etched into his features. “I’m here now. I promise. You’re not alone.”

The nurse had been alerted by Jess’s distress call and entered the room quickly, her presence a welcome distraction. She checked the IV line and adjusted the dosage of morphine, hoping to bring Jess some relief.

As the medication began to work, Jess’s breathing started to even out, though the pain still lingered. Luke remained by his side, his hand never leaving Jess’s. The panic in Jess’s eyes slowly faded as he looked up at his uncle, the fear gradually giving way to exhaustion.

“I’m sorry,” Jess murmured, his voice barely more than a breath. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“Don’t apologize,” Luke said firmly, though his voice was gentle. “You needed me. That’s all that matters. I’m here, okay? We’ll get through this together.”

The room grew quiet again, the nurse’s footsteps fading away as she left to attend to other patients. Luke continued to sit beside Jess, his hand a steady presence in the darkness. As Jess’s eyes fluttered closed, the fear slowly ebbed away, replaced by a fragile sense of comfort.

Luke watched over him, a silent promise in his heart. No matter how tough the night was, he would be there for Jess, every step of the way.

As the night deepened, Luke stayed by Jess’s side, feeling the steady rhythm of his nephew’s heartbeat through the smaller hand he held. His own fatigue was a distant thought compared to the hope he held for Jess’s recovery.

Tomorrow would be a pivotal day, and while there was fear and uncertainty, there was also a deep, unwavering belief in their collective strength and resilience. They would get through this, one step at a time, together.

Chapter Text

The morning of Jess's transplant day dawned quietly, the soft light filtering through the blinds and casting a gentle glow over the room. Luke was already awake, sitting beside Jess's bed, holding his nephew's hand. He hadn’t slept much. He kept watching Jess, dreading the upcoming transplant. He knew it was quite a simple and pain-free procedure, but it wasn’t that he was afraid of. He was terrified that his cells weren’t good enough, that they would make Jess even sicker. But then again, he thought it must be nearly impossible for Jess to get any sicker.

The boy looked even more exhausted than the day before. He was running a fever which caused him to shiver under his thick blanket. His eyes were closed but dark circles could be seen underneath. It seemed like no matter how much he slept, sleep just couldn’t take away his exhaustion.

Jess was showing signs of waking up and Luke sighed, gently squeezing Jess's hand. He leaned closer, trying to bring a bit of comfort to his nephew. “Hey, kiddo,” he said softly. “How are you holding up?”

Jess’s eyes fluttered open, a pained grimace on his lips. “How do you think?” he snapped, his voice hoarse. “I’d rather be giving birth than have this pain in me. There’s no way that shit hurts this bad.”

Luke tried to hide his smile because it didn’t seem appropriate to smile at his nephew’s pain. “You’ll start feeling better after the transplant.”

“I fucking better.”

Dr. Parker entered the room with a calm, reassuring presence. "Good morning, Jess, Luke," he greeted them. "How are we feeling today?"

Jess lay on his side, his face buried in his comforter. He was feeling the same as yesterday, so pretty damn bad. He just wanted the whole ordeal to be over already. He was sick and tired of being sick and tired. “Not good”, he managed to answer without snapping. He thought it was pretty obvious how he was feeling just by looking at him.

Dr. Parker nodded sympathetically. "I understand, Jess. The treatment has made you weak. Today is a big day, a turning point for you. We’re going to start the transplant in just a few minutes."

Luke squeezed Jess's hand gently. "You’ve got this, kid. We're right here with you."

Jess looked at his uncle, his eyes reflecting both his exhaustion and determination. He nodded slightly, grateful for Luke’s constant presence, although he had started to get sick of always seeing Luke in the room whenever he woke up from his slumber. However, Jess had been too tired and sore lately to feel any other emotions.

Dr. Parker and Julie began preparing the equipment. They carefully connected the IV drip to Jess’s port, the thin line that would deliver the life-saving bone marrow cells directly into his bloodstream. Jess groaned quietly at the unusual sensation.

"Alright, Jess," Dr. Parker said, his voice steady and comforting. "We’re going to start the infusion now. Just try to relax. This will take a few hours, and we’ll be monitoring you closely the entire time."

Jess nodded again, his eyes closing as he took a deep breath. Luke continued to hold his hand, offering silent support.

As the first drops of the new cells entered Jess’s body, a sense of anticipation filled the room. Dr. Parker and Julie watched the monitors intently, ensuring everything was proceeding smoothly. The rhythmic beeping of the machines was a steady backdrop to the momentous procedure taking place.

Jess's face was a mixture of pain and hope. He winced slightly as the infusion began, the soreness in his body amplified by the new cells entering his system. Luke’s grip on his hand tightened. He watched as Jess adjusted in the bed, trying to find a comfortable position. Unfortunately for him, he wasn’t allowed morphine during the procedure, which left him in greater pain than he would’ve hoped.

"Everything is looking good so far”, Dr. Parker said as he glanced at the monitors. Jess was still on his side, clutching Luke’s hand to his chest and breathing heavily with his eyes closed. He was trying his hardest to fall asleep to escape the pain if only for a moment. But it was too prominent and wouldn’t let him rest.

Jess moaned in pain. “What’s wrong?” Luke asked more from Dr. Parker than from Jess as he knew that the boy was barely functioning.

“He’s in pain but it’s not due to the procedure. Morphine isn’t fit to take during blood transfusions, so this was to be expected”, he explained.

“Can you give him anything else? He’s struggling”, Luke said as he kept glancing at his nephew lying helplessly on the hospital bed.

“I can give him some sedatives to lull him asleep until he can get morphine again. That way he would be comfortable.”

“Please. I can’t watch him like this” Luke nearly begged the doctor.

Dr. Parker nodded sympathetically and turned to Julie, who had been standing by with a prepared sedative. “Julie, let’s get him something to help him rest.”

Julie moved swiftly, filling a syringe with the sedative and then carefully administering it through Jess’s IV. She gently brushed a hand over Jess’s forehead, speaking softly, “You’ll feel better soon, dear. Just rest.”

Jess’s grip on Luke’s hand tightened for a moment, his eyes fluttering as he fought the pain. “I’m so tired,” he mumbled, his voice barely audible.

“I know, kid,” Luke said, his own voice thick with emotion. “Just hang in there. You’re doing great.”

As the sedative began to take effect, Jess’s breathing started to even out. His face relaxed slightly, and his grip on Luke’s hand loosened. Within minutes, he was asleep, the lines of pain smoothing out on his face.

Luke let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, his heart aching at the sight of his nephew finally finding some relief. “Thank you,” he said to Dr. Parker and Julie, his voice filled with gratitude.

Dr. Parker nodded, his expression kind. “He’ll be more comfortable now. We’ll monitor him closely and ensure he gets the best care.”

Julie stayed by Jess’s side, checking his vitals and making sure everything was stable. “You can rest too, Luke. He’s in good hands.”

Luke shook his head. “I’ll stay right here. I don’t want him to wake up alone.”

Julie gave him a reassuring smile. “You’re a good uncle, Luke. Jess is lucky to have you.”

The room fell into a peaceful silence, the only sounds being the soft beeping of the monitors and Jess’s steady breathing. Luke watched over Jess, his mind a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions. Time seemed to move slowly, each minute stretching out as the new cells continued to drip into Jess’s port. Luke didn’t notice any visible difference in Jess’s appearance but then again, Dr. Parker had said it would take weeks for Jess’s bone marrow to start producing new cells. This wasn’t a quick fix.

Jess remained asleep until the very end of the infusion. He woke up groaning, the sedative’s effect waning as he looked around the room in confusion. He saw the nearly empty bag of Luke’s cells hanging in the IV pole, connecting to the port in his chest and he remembered where he was.

Jess blinked a few times, trying to shake off the lingering fog from the sedative. He looked at Luke, who offered a reassuring smile. “We’re almost done, kid. You did great.”

Dr. Parker stepped forward, checking the final readings on the monitors. “The transplant has gone smoothly, Jess. Now we wait and see how your body responds to the new cells. This is a critical period, but you’re in good hands.”

Jess nodded weakly, his eyes drooping. He was still exhausted, still in pain, but he was glad that the transplant had gone well and he could start recovering for real now.

“Okay, Jess,” Dr. Parker continued, “the next steps are crucial. Over the next few weeks, we’ll monitor you closely for any signs of infection or complications. Your immune system will be very weak, so we need to be extremely careful about preventing infections.”

Jess listened, though he struggled to stay fully awake. He felt a mix of relief and apprehension at the thought of the coming weeks. “What about the pain?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

“We’ll manage your pain as best as we can,” Dr. Parker assured him. “You’ll have access to pain relief, and we’ll adjust your medication as needed. The key is to keep you comfortable while your body begins to accept the new cells.”

Julie, who had been monitoring Jess’s vitals, nodded in agreement. “You’re doing great, Jess. Just take it one day at a time. We’re all here to help you through this.”

Jess closed his eyes, feeling a bit more at ease with the support of his family and the medical team. He gave them a weak nod.

Luke sat by Jess's side. The room was filled with a quiet sense of anticipation and hope. Trying to lighten the mood, Luke smiled and said, "You know, Jess, now that you've got some of my cells in you, don’t be surprised if you suddenly develop a craving for healthy eating. You might start loving vegetables and whole grains.”

Jess, despite his fatigue, managed a small chuckle. “Yeah right, Uncle Luke. I’ll believe it when I see it.”

Luke grinned. “Well, you never know. Maybe you’ll even start wearing flannel shirts all the time, just like me.”

Jess laughed softly. “If I start craving tofu, I’m blaming you.”

“Fair enough,” Luke said, squeezing Jess’s hand gently. “But hey, if you start feeling healthier and stronger, you can thank me for that, too.”

Jess nodded, his eyes closing again as the exhaustion took over. “Thanks, Luke,” he whispered. Luke leaned in closer, his voice soft and filled with affection. “Anything for you, kid. We’re in this together.”

Later that day, Rory made her way to the hospital, her heart heavy with worry. When she entered Jess's room, she found him asleep, his body still weak from the transplant. Luke sat by his bedside, looking tired but determined.

"Hey, Luke," Rory greeted softly, taking a seat on the other side of Jess's bed.

"Hey, Rory," Luke replied, his voice low to avoid waking Jess. "He's been in and out of it all day. The pain meds are keeping him mostly asleep."

Rory reached out and gently touched Jess's hand, her heart aching to see him in such a fragile state. "How's he doing?"

Luke sighed, glancing at Jess before answering. "He's hanging in there. The transplant went well, but now we just have to wait and see how his body responds. Dr. Parker says the next few weeks are crucial."

Rory nodded, her eyes never leaving Jess's face.

They sat in silence for a few moments, each lost in their thoughts. Rory finally broke the silence, her voice trembling slightly. "I feel so helpless, Luke. I wish there was more I could do for him."

Luke reached across the bed and patted her hand. "You’re doing everything you can Rory. Knowing he has people who love him and support him is important. It gives him strength, even if he can't show it right now."

Rory nodded, tears welling up in her eyes. "I love him so much, Luke. I can't stand seeing him in pain."

"I know," Luke said, his voice softening. "But he's not alone in this. We're all here for him, and we're going to help him get through it."

Rory took a deep breath, trying to steady her emotions. "Thanks, Luke. It helps to know that we're in this together."

They continued to sit by Jess's bedside, offering silent support and comfort as the hours passed. Jess remained asleep, occasionally stirring and murmuring softly. But despite his weakened state, there was a sense of peace in the room, a quiet strength that came from the love and determination of those who cared for him.

As the day turned into evening, Rory stayed by Jess's side, holding his hand and whispering words of encouragement. Luke watched over them both, his heart aching. The scene never failed to remind him of how unfair life could be.

Luke decided to step out of the room for a bit, needing a moment to clear his head and maybe grab something to eat. "I'll be right back," he said softly to Rory, giving her a reassuring nod before he left.

Rory remained by Jess's side, holding his hand gently. After a few minutes, she felt Jess's fingers twitch in hers. She looked up to see his eyes fluttering open. He looked so tired, but she was glad to see him wake up for a bit.

"Hey there," she greeted him softly, her face lighting up with a smile.

"Rory?" Jess mumbled, his voice still groggy but a hint of happiness evident. "You're here."

"Of course, I'm here," she replied, leaning in closer. "How are you feeling?"

"A bit better," he admitted, his eyes scanning the room and then settling back on her. "I missed you”

Rory's smile widened, and she gently brushed a stray strand of hair from his forehead. "I missed you too," she whispered. She leaned in and began planting soft kisses along his jawline, each one tender and filled with love.

Jess closed his eyes, savoring the feel of her lips against his skin. It felt better than anything else had in a long time. He could feel the warmth of her love and support, and it was a comfort unlike any other.

Rory's fingers began tapping gently on his chest, a soothing rhythm that matched the beat of his heart. "You've been so strong, Jess," she murmured between kisses. "I'm so proud of you."

He managed a small, tired smile. "Couldn't have done it without you," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

Rory's heart swelled with emotion. "You have all of us rooting for you," she replied softly. "You're not alone in this."

Jess nodded gratefully. “I would’ve told the doctors to stop the treatment a long time ago if I didn’t have you and Luke”, he admitted. It was something he had been pondering from time to time but he never seriously considered the option. He couldn’t do it to his loved ones. But if he had no one, he would’ve stopped the torture a long time ago. There would be no point in surviving if he had to face the demons on his own.

Rory’s expression turned serious. “What do you mean?”

“Just that it would be too much to handle on my own. It would be easier to just give up. But I couldn’t do it to you, so I’ll keep going.”

“Do you promise?” she asked him with a hint of sadness in her voice.

“I promise”, he said and kissed her hand which was now intertwined with his own.

“Make room for me?” Rory asked him and Jess immediately shifted in his bed, making space for Rory to join him. She climbed in carefully and moved the wires connected to his body out of the way before getting comfortable next to her boyfriend. She leaned her head on his bony shoulder and continued to hold his hand on his chest now.

“Don’t you think for a second that you have to do this alone, Jess. I’m always here. You know Luke will always be here. And mom”, she told him while rubbing her thumb against his hand sweetly.

“I know”, Jess said softly.

“Do you know that I love you?” Rory asked with a smile now.

“Yeah, I know that too. I love you too”, he smiled.

They stayed like that for a while, the room filled with a quiet sense of peace and love. Jess’s eyes began to droop soon and Rory told him not to fight the sleep. She studied his face as sleep overtook him again and he fell into a deep slumber. She continued to hold his hand, not loosening her grip even when Jess tossed in his sleep.

Luke returned to the room a moment later, the pain in his heart only intensifying as he saw the scene in front of him.

“He woke up for a bit, but he got tired again. I told him to sleep”, Rory spoke quietly as to not disturb the sick boy.

“Good. He needs it.” Luke simply said as he sat down next to Jess.

They continued to observe Jess with vigilance, each small groan and a whimper alerting both of them. But Jess remained asleep and Luke and Rory remained by his side no matter what.

Luke couldn’t bear to leave Jess alone in the isolation room just yet, so he decided to stay at least for the night. He had been gone from the diner for a week now and it was about maximum of what Ceasar could handle on his own.

Rory had to leave that evening, leaving Jess and Luke alone once more. Luke watched the kid sleep. Kid. That’s what Luke called Jess quite often. Jess was his kid, at least in a way. Sure, Jess was his nephew but he had also lived with Luke for over two years now. It wasn’t a whole lot of time but it was the most stable time the kid had had in all his life and that was pretty major. And Jess had said himself that he viewed Luke as a father figure. That made Luke’s heart melt just a little.

Luke prided himself on being reliable and trustworthy for the people he cared about. It was something he had always felt the need to be like. But apparently, his sister didn’t get the same memo. She got the quite opposite of it. Judging from the way Jess behaved, he could never rely on his mother, or anyone before moving to Stars Hollow. Luke guessed that it made sense why the kid misbehaved so much. He tried to get Luke to abandon him like everyone else in his life had done because he wasn’t used to somebody caring about him. It made him sad just thinking about it.

It was well past midnight when Jess showed signs of waking up again. He opened his eyes with a groan and coughed weakly to clear his throat from the build-up junk blocking his airways.

“I didn’t think you’d wake up again tonight”, Luke commented as Jess’s eyes landed on him.

“Yeah well, I’m full of surprises.”

Luke watched as Jess struggled to sit up, the effort making him wince. The boy's face contorted in pain, and his hands trembled as he pushed against the mattress.

“Let me help you,” Luke said, stepping closer with concern etched across his face.

Jess waved him off weakly, his stubbornness showing through despite his weakened state. “I got it,” he insisted, his voice shaky. He hated feeling so helpless, so dependent.

Luke paused, respecting Jess's independence, but he stayed close, ready to help. After a few moments of futile effort, Jess let out a frustrated sigh and glanced at his uncle. “Alright, fine,” he muttered. Swallowing his pride, he allowed Luke to assist him.

Luke moved carefully, slipping an arm under Jess's shoulders and lifting him gently. “Easy does it,” he murmured, guiding Jess into a sitting position. Jess gripped Luke's arm tightly, the pain evident in his eyes but masked by his determined expression.

“Thanks,” Jess mumbled, once he was upright, leaning back against the pillows that Luke had arranged behind him.

“No problem,” Luke replied, taking a seat beside the bed. “How are you feeling?”

Jess shrugged, a small, weary smile tugging at his lips. “Like an army of elephants stomped on me,” he said, trying to lighten the mood despite the truth of his words.

“You’re doing good, Jess,” Luke said, his voice firm with encouragement. “You’ve made it through the hardest part. Now it’s just about getting better.”

Jess nodded slowly. “Yeah, I know. It’s just… hard,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.

“I know it is,” Luke said, reaching out to place a comforting hand on Jess's shoulder. “But you’re strong, kid. And you’ve got a lot of people who care about you.”

The mention of support brought a faint smile to Jess's face. “Rory was here earlier,” he said, a touch of warmth in his voice.

Luke smiled too. “Yeah, I saw her. She’s worried about you, you know.”

Jess’s eyes softened. “I know. She makes everything seem a little less… hopeless.”

Luke nodded, understanding the sentiment. “She’s a good one, that Rory. We’re all lucky to have her around.”

They sat in comfortable silence for a while, the weight of the past few days hanging between them but not needing to be spoken. Jess’s breathing was still labored, but the pain seemed to have eased somewhat, allowing him to relax a bit more.

“How are you holding up?” Jess asked suddenly, glancing at his uncle with genuine concern. The man had been stuck with him in the tiny hospital room for a week now and even though he was allowed to leave the room, he rarely did and only for a short while.

Luke was taken aback by the question but smiled reassuringly. “I’m okay, Jess. Just worried about you. But seeing you here, fighting like you are, it gives me hope that you’ll beat this.”

Jess nodded, a flicker of determination in his eyes. “I’m not giving up. Not now.”

“Good,” Luke said firmly. “Because we’re not giving up on you either.”

As the night continued to settle into a quiet rhythm, the door to Jess's room opened, and Julie stepped in. She smiled as she approached Jess’s bedside, her eyes full of professional concern and genuine care.

“Hey there, Jess,” Julie greeted, her voice soothing. “How are you holding up?”

Jess, who had been lying back with his eyes half-closed, slowly opened them and managed a faint smirk. “Oh, you know, just another fun-filled evening in paradise,” he quipped, his voice still weak but laced with his characteristic sarcasm.

Julie chuckled, appreciating his attempt at humor. “Well, I’m glad to see that your wit is still intact. Let’s check those vitals, shall we?”

As she began her routine check-up, Luke observed quietly from the side, relieved to see a spark of Jess's usual self. Julie took Jess’s temperature, blood pressure, and checked the IV line with practiced efficiency.

“Your vitals are looking good,” she said, making notes on her clipboard. “How’s the pain? Need anything?”

Jess shook his head slightly. “No more drugs, thanks. I’m starting to feel like a walking pharmacy.”

Julie smiled, understanding his frustration. “I get it. We’re trying to keep you as comfortable as possible without overdoing it. But remember, if the pain gets too much, don’t hesitate to let us know, okay?”

Jess sighed but nodded. “Yeah, yeah, I will.”

Julie finished her checks and then looked at Jess with a twinkle in her eye. “You know, Jess, with that attitude, you might just charm all the nurses here. We don’t get too many patients with your kind of... spirit.”

Jess managed a weak laugh. “I aim to please.”

“Good to hear,” Julie said warmly. She turned to Luke. “He’s doing well, considering everything. Just keep an eye on him and let us know if there’s any change.”

Luke nodded, grateful for her reassurance. “Thanks, Julie. We will.”

As Julie left the room, Jess closed his eyes again, exhaustion overtaking him. Luke sat back down, his hand resting gently on Jess’s arm. Despite the fatigue, there was a small, hopeful glimmer in Jess’s eyes, a sign that his spirit was still fighting.

“Get some rest, kid,” Luke said softly. “We’ve got a long road ahead, but we’re gonna get through it.”

Jess gave a slight nod, the corners of his mouth turning up just a bit. “Yeah, we will,” he murmured before drifting off to sleep once more.

The next morning wasn’t quite as glorious as the previous night. Jess woke up with relentless nausea and a very sore body. He threw up all over himself before he could even open his eyes.

Luke jumped to his feet to help the boy sit up.

“Ah fuck. I’m sorry”, Jess groaned, embarrassed and miserable as he was now covered in his own sick.

“It’s alright, bud. Nothing to be sorry about”, Luke told him and held his shoulder comfortingly. He called a nurse and soon enough Emily came through the door. Her face was full of sympathy as she saw him.

Luke helped Jess to sit on the edge of the bed and Emily stripped his shirt off him. At least the blanket covered his legs so the pants he was wearing were clean. “Let’s get you to the shower. Think you can stand while you’re in there?” Emily asked him as she and Luke were on either side of Jess, gripping him from under his shoulder, ready to walk him to the bathroom.

Jess shook his head at the question. No, he definitely couldn’t stand in the shower. He felt dizzy just sitting up.

“That’s okay. I’ll get you a stool so you can sit”, she comforted him.

The walk to the bathroom was short but it took them a long time. Jess could only take minimal steps even with the support he got. He was shaking and sweating, and it was so damn embarrassing but he could barely think about that because god he was dizzy and he felt so so awful.

Emily and Luke sat the trembling boy on a closed toilet lid. Jess’s head lolled forward and Luke had to grab Jess’s shoulders so he wouldn’t faceplant onto the bathroom floor. “Fuck”, Jess groaned again.

“You gonna be sick again?” Luke asked him, already grabbing a thrash can for him but Jess shook his head.

Emily left to get the shower stool for Jess and Luke was left alone with the ill kid again. His face was painted with concern as there was nothing he could do to ease Jess’s discomfort. He moved his other hand to Jess’s bare back to stroke his thumb between his tense shoulder blades.

“I’m sorry you feel so bad, kid”, Luke murmured. Jess’s eyes were closed and he was leaning forward, his face buried in his hands.

Luke noticed how heavily Jess was breathing, his chest moving rapidly with the shallow breaths. He also noticed Jess’s thinner frame. After Jess had started going to the gym, the boy was never shy about walking around the apartment shirtless. But it was painfully obvious that all that muscle Jess had managed to build was gone and so was the much-needed fat he had managed to gather after his treatment last year.

Emily returned with the stool, and she placed it in the shower. “Jess seems very shaky and weak. Luke, I think it would be best if you could help him with the shower”, Emily said apologetically.

Jess perked up at this. “No. I can do it”, he protested weakly. He attempted to stand up on his own to prove that he was perfectly capable of showering on his own. However, he was too weak to even lift his butt from the closed lid fully.

Luke held Jess’s shoulder and looked at the struggling boy sadly. “Hey, it’s alright buddy. I’ll help you”, he said gently.

Jess shook his head, but the motion only made him dizzier. He had to fight back another wave of nausea. “I don’t want you to have to,” Jess muttered, his voice barely audible.

“Jess, I know you want to do this yourself, but sometimes it’s okay to accept help,” Luke said softly. “I’ll just stand outside of the curtain in case you need help, okay?”

Jess sighed, the fight draining out of him. “Fine,” he whispered, the word barely escaping his lips.

Luke gently helped Jess to his feet, keeping a firm grip on his arm. Emily left the bathroom to give Jess some privacy. Once the door was closed, Jess sighed and Luke walked him to the stool. Jess sat down and closed the curtain before stripping down his pants and socks. He turned the water on as hot as it went and just sat under the stream for a moment.

“Just yell if you need any help”, Luke told him from the other side of the curtain.

Jess sat under the hot water stream, letting it wash over him and trying to feel some semblance of normalcy. The water was almost scalding, but the heat helped soothe his aching muscles and provided a temporary distraction from the constant discomfort. He took a few deep breaths, attempting to gather the strength to wash himself.

“Everything okay in there?” Luke’s voice came from the other side of the curtain, filled with concern.

“Yeah,” Jess replied weakly, his voice echoing slightly in the tiled bathroom. “Just give me a minute.”

He reached for the soap, his hands trembling as he lathered it between his palms. He moved slowly, methodically, trying to wash away the grime and sweat that had accumulated. Each movement felt like it took an immense amount of effort, but he was determined to do it on his own.

After a few minutes, Jess felt the water starting to cool. He finished rinsing himself and turned the water off, shivering slightly as the cooler air hit his wet skin. He wrapped a towel around himself and sat back down on the stool, feeling utterly drained.

“Luke, I’m done,” he called out, his voice barely above a whisper.

Luke cracked the curtain open, quickly moving to Jess’s side. “How are you feeling?” he asked, his eyes filled with worry.

“Exhausted,” Jess admitted, leaning heavily against Luke as he helped him stand. “But clean.”

“Let’s get you back to bed,” Luke said, guiding Jess out of the bathroom and into the main room. Emily had finished changing the sheets, and the bed looked invitingly fresh and comfortable.

Jess collapsed onto the bed with a sigh of relief, allowing Luke to help him dry off and put on a clean pair of pajamas. “Thanks, Luke,” he mumbled, his eyes already drifting closed.

“You’re welcome, kid,” Luke said softly, tucking Jess in.

Emily returned with a syringe filled with medication, her expression gentle and sympathetic. "Jess, I'm going to give you some meds through your IV," she said softly. "They'll help with the pain and nausea, okay?"

Jess nodded weakly, his head barely moving. He felt completely drained, the effort of the shower and the day's events taking their toll. Emily carefully connected the syringe to his IV port and slowly administered the medication.

"You're doing great, Jess," she reassured him, her voice soothing. "These will kick in soon and help you feel more comfortable."

Jess mumbled his thanks, his eyelids already growing heavy. The combination of exhaustion, the shower, and the medications was quickly lulling him into a state of drowsiness. He felt Luke's hand on his shoulder, steady and reassuring.

"Get some rest, Jess," Luke said quietly. "I'll be right here."

With a final, weak nod, Jess let himself sink into the pillows. The pain began to dull, and the nausea receded as the medication took effect. The room seemed to blur around him, and he could hear the soft murmur of Emily and Luke's voices as they spoke quietly nearby. He focused on the comforting presence of his uncle and the warmth of the freshly changed sheets, allowing the darkness to overtake him.

Once Luke was certain that Jess was asleep, he pulled out his cell phone and dialed Lorelai’s number. She picked up almost instantly.

“Heyyy, how are my favorite boys doing”, Lorelai said as soon as she picked up.

“Well, I’m fine. Jess, not so much”, Luke sighed.

“What’s wrong with him?” Lorelai asked with concern in her voice.

“He woke up nauseous and in pain. Threw up all over himself before anyone could do anything.”

“That’s a lousy wake-up call. Poor kid”, Lorelai said empathetically.

Luke’s eyes darted to Jess’s sleeping form. He was lying on his side, knees curled up and face buried in the pillow. “Yeah, he was pretty miserable. We got him cleaned up and medicated though and he’s sleeping now.”

Lorelai's voice softened with understanding. "It's so hard seeing him go through this, but he's lucky to have you there, Luke."

"Thanks," Luke replied, running a hand through his hair. "I just wish there was more I could do for him. Watching him suffer like this... it's tough."

"I know, but you're doing great. Just being there for him means the world," Lorelai reassured him. "Is there anything I can do? Bring you guys something? Maybe some food from the diner?"

Luke chuckled softly, appreciating her offer. "You know, hospital food isn't exactly gourmet. I think Jess would love something from Luke’s. He’s always whining about the food here. I don’t need anything, really.”

"Consider it done," Lorelai said cheerfully. "Any special requests from our patient?"

"Honestly, I think he'd be happy with anything that doesn't taste like cardboard," Luke said with a grin.

"Got it. I'll bring a variety then. And maybe a few surprises to lift his spirits," Lorelai added.

Luke smiled, feeling a bit lighter at the thought. "Thanks, Lorelai. That means a lot."

"Of course, I want to help him feel better," Lorelai said warmly. "I'll be there in about an hour. Hang in there, Luke. You're doing amazing."

Not long after the call with Lorelai, Dr. Parker entered the room carrying a clipboard, his face mostly hidden by a face mask but still radiating a comforting aura. “Good morning, Luke”, he greeted the older man. “How’s our patient doing?”

Luke told Dr. Parker about Jess’s morning. Dr. Parker scribbled notes in Jess’s chart. “The side effects of the chemo are still hitting him pretty hard. They should ease up by the end of the week, which should make him feel better unless he starts experiencing rejection or side effects to the transplant”, Dr. Parker explained with an understanding tone.

“So, he might feel miserable for weeks still?” Luke questioned.

“Unfortunately, it’s possible. Until his bone marrow starts producing new cells, he’ll feel quite weak. This might also affect his mental well-being. He might become irritable, sad, and even depressed, so it’s important we also monitor that on top of his physical health.”

Luke sighed, his eyes wandering back to his sick nephew. He wished he could stay there with Jess until he felt better, but the thing was, he had already been away from the diner for longer than he should have. He couldn’t possibly stay any longer.

“I want to stay with him. But I can’t. My diner is falling apart and I can’t lose my income with all the hospital bills coming my way”, Luke said with a sense of regret in his voice.

“It’s completely normal to be worried about that. It’s hard to balance home life and hospital life for many of our families. But Jess is in good hands here, as you know.”

Luke nodded. “I know. I’ll just feel guilty. Knowing that he’s here all alone, feeling miserable. I feel like I’ll fail him.”

“Luke, you won’t fail Jess. It’s true that he needs a lot of support right now, but that doesn’t mean you have to be here 24/7. He still sleeps most of the day and we’ll keep you updated when you’re not here”, Dr. Parker reassured Luke. He had a convincing voice, the kind which made you believe everything they said.

Dr. Parker checked Jess’s vitals as the boy slept. He placed the clipboard on the small table beside the bed, reached for his stethoscope, and gently lifted the edge of the blanket covering Jess. The boy stirred slightly but didn't wake.

"Let's check those vitals," Dr. Parker murmured, slipping the stethoscope into his ears. He placed the cold metal disk against Jess's chest, listening intently to the rhythmic beat of his heart.

"His heart rate is elevated," Dr. Parker noted, his brow furrowing slightly. "Could be due to pain or stress. We'll monitor it closely."

Luke nodded, his worry etched deeply into his features.

Dr. Parker moved the stethoscope to Jess's back, asking Luke to help adjust the boy slightly so he could get a clear listen to his lungs. Jess's breathing was shallow but even, each inhale and exhale audible in the quiet room.

"His lungs sound clear, which is good," Dr. Parker said, removing the stethoscope and jotting down some notes on his clipboard. He then took Jess's wrist gently, feeling for his pulse and timing it with a watch. The steady but rapid thump confirmed what he'd heard through the stethoscope.

Next, Dr. Parker reached for the blood pressure cuff. He wrapped it around Jess's arm, careful not to disturb him too much, and pumped it up. The cuff tightened, causing Jess to stir again, a faint groan escaping his lips.

"Sorry, buddy," Dr. Parker whispered, watching the gauge until it stabilized. "Blood pressure is a bit high, but not alarmingly so."

He released the pressure from the cuff and noted the readings. Moving on, Dr. Parker picked up the thermometer and placed it under Jess's tongue, waiting for it to beep.

"Fever's still present," Dr. Parker confirmed, removing the thermometer and adding the temperature to his notes. "We'll keep an eye on it and adjust his meds if necessary."

Lastly, he checked the IV lines, ensuring the fluids and medications were flowing properly. Everything seemed to be in order, and Dr. Parker made a few final notes on the clipboard before turning back to Luke.

"He's stable, but we'll need to continue monitoring closely. The elevated heart rate and fever are concerning, but not unexpected given the circumstances."

Luke nodded, his concern evident. After the doctor left, Luke sat back down beside Jess, gently brushing a hand over his nephew's forehead. Jess stirred slightly but remained asleep.

Lorelai entered the hospital room with a cheerful smile, carrying a bag full of goods from Luke’s and a takeaway cup of a green smoothie for Luke. He looked up from his chair, relief washing over his face at the sight of her.

"Hey, how are my favorite boys?" Lorelai greeted softly, setting the goods on the small table near Luke.

"Better now that you're here," Luke replied, giving her a tired but grateful smile.

Lorelai handed him the smoothie. "Thought you might need this. I bet the processed foods of the hospital wouldn’t be to your liking. You need something clean and organic," she said, her eyes twinkling. "The stuff from Luke’s is mainly for the sick boy here, but if he’s not feeling up for them, you may have a share of them as well.”

Luke took a sip of the smoothie "Thanks, Lorelai. You have no idea how much I needed this."

She settled into the chair next to him, glancing over at Jess, who was still sleeping soundly. "How's he doing?"

"Rough night, but he's stable," Luke said, his voice low. "Dr. Parker checked his vitals earlier. He's got a fever and his heart rate is up, but they're keeping an eye on it."

Lorelai nodded, her expression softening. "Poor kid. Well, I brought a few surprises for him when he wakes up. Figured he could use a little cheering up."

Luke raised an eyebrow, curious. "What kind of surprises?"

"Oh, just some of his favorite books, a couple of comic books, and a new set of headphones. Thought he might enjoy some music or an audiobook to pass the time."

Luke chuckled softly. "You always know how to brighten up a room."

"It's a talent," Lorelai said with a wink. "By the way, Rory's at her grandparents' house today. Mom is organizing some massive fund raiser event and she needed her help with it. And Rory being Rory, she couldn’t say no."

"She told me she'd be here," Luke said, looking a bit disappointed.

"Yeah, I know," Lorelai replied, patting his hand. "She feels really bad about it, but Emily guilt tripped her into it. And you know that when that woman wants something, she gets it. Not even a boyfriend with cancer is coming between her plans.”

Luke nodded, understanding. "I get it. It's just been a tough few days."

"I know," Lorelai said sympathetically.

“I can’t stay with him any longer. I have to get back to the diner tomorrow, but I feel so bad leaving him here.”

“I’m sure he’ll understand. Plus, I think he’ll like some alone time as well”, Lorelai comforted him

Luke hummed. “Yeah, I guess. It’s just that Dr. Parker said this might affect him mentally and that he might get depressed.”

Lorelai frowned slightly. “We’ll maybe we could come up with a schedule, so someone could be here with him as much as possible. I’m sure Rory would want to stay here all the time, and well, she doesn’t really have anything else before moving away to college.”

“But I don’t want you to lose the last moments with her if she spends all her time here”, Luke protested lightly.

“Rory wants to be here. It’s not like I can force her to hang out with mommy. And we still have time. She doesn’t move until the end of August.”

Luke fell silent for a moment. “We’ll think about it.”

 “Hey, let's try to keep things light. We don't want Jess waking up to a bunch of gloom and doom."

Luke managed a small smile. "Agreed. So, tell me, what's the latest in Stars Hollow gossip?"

Lorelai launched into a humorous recounting of the latest town drama, complete with exaggerated voices and animated gestures. Luke listened, grateful for the distraction and the sound of her laughter. For a little while, the heaviness in the room lifted, replaced by the warmth of their shared moments.

"Did you hear about Kirk's latest business venture?" Lorelai asked, eyes sparkling with mischief.

Luke groaned, already anticipating the absurdity. "Oh no, what now?"

"A llama rental service," Lorelai said, barely able to contain her laughter. "He's convinced there's a market for people wanting to rent llamas for parties and events."

Luke couldn't help but laugh. "Only in Stars Hollow."

"Exactly," Lorelai agreed, grinning. "And Taylor's been trying to convince him to turn it into a tourist attraction, complete with llama-themed souvenirs."

They shared a laugh, the sound blending with the quiet hum of the hospital room. Jess stirred slightly in his sleep, and Luke could tell he would be waking up soon. Luke glanced over at him, his heart aching for his nephew but feeling a bit lighter thanks to Lorelai's presence.

"Thanks for being here," Luke said quietly, his gratitude evident.

"Always," Lorelai replied, her tone sincere. "We're in this together, remember?"

Jess stirred awake, his eyelids fluttering open as he adjusted to the dim light filtering through the window blinds. He groaned softly, trying to push through the lingering haze of sleep and pain.

"Hey, kid," Luke said gently, his voice laced with concern. "How are you feeling?"

Jess blinked a few times, his gaze finally focusing on Luke. “Peachy”, he muttered. He shifted slightly, trying to find a more comfortable position, but his face tightened with discomfort.

Luke adjusted the IV line, ensuring Jess was comfortable. “How’s the pain?”

Jess shrugged, not wanting to admit how much he was hurting. “It’s bearable,” he lied, not wanting to worry his uncle more than necessary.

Before Luke could respond, Lorelai, who had been sitting nearby, leaned in with a cheerful tone. "Well, look who's decided to join us," she said, trying to lighten the mood. "How are you feeling, champ?"

Jess managed to focus his bleary eyes on her. "Peachy," he repeated, then managed a faint smile. "But I guess I'm still here, so that’s something."

"That's the spirit," Lorelai said, reaching into the bag she had brought with her. "I brought you a little something to brighten your day."

She pulled out a stack of comic books, placing them gently on the bed beside him. "Thought you might need some new reading material. Also, these might be good for when you’re too tired to concentrate on a novel."

Jess's eyes lit up slightly as he reached for the comics. "Thanks, Lorelai. This is great."

"Wait, there's more!" she said, her voice full of enthusiasm. She then produced a pair of new headphones and a few of his favorite books. "I know how much you love your music and reading, so I figured these might come in handy."

Jess's expression softened with gratitude. "You really didn’t have to do all this."

"Oh, hush," Lorelai said with a wave of her hand. "It's the least I can do. Besides, you deserve some distractions while you're stuck here."

Luke watched the exchange with a small smile. "See, you’re already feeling better," he teased gently. "Lorelai's magic touch at work."

Jess managed a weak chuckle, then winced slightly from the effort. "Yeah, I guess so."

"Just take it easy, okay? We’re all here for you."

"Thanks," Jess whispered, his eyes closing again as he succumbed to the exhaustion.

"Get some rest," Luke said softly, squeezing Jess's hand gently. "We'll be right here when you wake up."

Jess nodded slightly, already drifting back to sleep. Lorelai and Luke settled back into their chairs, the comforting presence of each other providing a sense of calm amidst the uncertainty.

Chapter Text

The next morning, Jess woke up to rain hitting his window and thunder raging outside. Once he managed to open his eyes all the way, he noticed that he was alone in the room and all of Luke’s stuff was gone. Jess lay on his side, his fingers fidgeting with the edge of the fluffy blanket that Rory and Lorelai had given him. He was left alone. He could already feel the anxiety building inside of him.

A note was folded and placed on the bedside table and Jess reached for it.

Hi Jess. I’m sorry but I have to get back to the diner. I’ll come see you as soon as I can again. I hope you’re feeling better.

Luke

Jess bit his lip. Not even a proper goodbye. He had expected that Luke wouldn’t stay with him for the entire time and yes, his face had started to annoy Jess after a few days, but that didn’t mean he wanted Luke gone. And he wanted to be all mature about this but quite frankly, that was hard to do when you’re ill and feel like a little kid craving for comfort.

He glanced at the clock, and it already read past 10 am, meaning that Jess had slept through his morning check-up as well. He was alone for real. Somehow, he felt worse than he had expected. He thought that he couldn’t wait to be alone and he’d be glad to have some alone time. But now he felt like a little kid being abandoned by his mom. And Jess knew that feeling.

Jess had practiced some healthy coping mechanisms recommended by his therapist. Yes, he was in therapy. And he knew that instead of shutting down or getting angry, he should write down his feelings. And that’s exactly what he would do now.

I didn’t expect to wake up to an empty room. Luke didn’t tell me he was leaving. He just left me a crappy note. I don’t wanna be alone. It’s not that I’m scared. Or maybe I am, I don’t know. But the more I’ve had company, the more I’ve realized that I don’t actually like being alone as much as I’ve told myself. It was just that I never had anyone reliable to be around, to care about me. And I’ve realized that having someone like that around is a million times better than being alone and dealing with shit on your own.

But now I’m alone again. I even missed seeing Julie this morning cuz I was still sleeping. I could always press the call button but what would I even say? ‘Oh I was feeling lonely, please stay with me.’ No. That’s embarrassing. And they have more important things to do than deal with me. Someone else deserves their care more than me. At least my physical symptoms don’t feel as bad when I’m also mentally fucked up. All I can feel is the uncomfortable weight on my chest, but I think that’s all mental too. I remember feeling the same way whenever Liz would leave me alone in the apartments. Fuck, I didn’t want to think about her now because now I’ll think of Jimmy and why he left me and that’s never good. I have his number. I got it off Liz’s phone when she visited on Christmas. I haven’t called him. I don’t know what I’d say. Why did you leave me? What so terrible could I have possibly done at two days old that you decided that I wasn’t worth it? Something like that, I guess.

What if Luke decides I’m not worth it anymore? That I’m too sick to take care of, to be around? I mean, he’s not like that but maybe I’m just too much. He hasn’t had to deal with anyone with a relapse of leukemia before. If Luke left, I bet Rory would too. She admires that man more than anything and I’m sure she wouldn’t question why he left his mess of a nephew. Especially not when Lorelai is there, supporting Luke’s decision. They promised to stay. But it’s easy to break promises, isn’t it? Liz broke her promise of getting sober. She promised she would take care of me. I promised I would always be her good little boy. And they promised to stay.

Jess tried to blink away the tears that had formed in his eyes. God, he hated when he got emotional. That had happened way too much lately. He decided that now would be a lovely time to pop in his earphones and listen to some death metal so loud that his eardrums popped. But just as he was about to do so, he heard a soft knock on the indoor window leading to the corridor. Jess had the blinds drawn but he reached out to lift them to see what was going on.

There, on the other side of the window stood Anna and her mother Grace. Anna was no longer wearing the hospital pajamas and her mother was carrying a large bag with all her belongings in it. It looked like she had been discharged.

“Jess!” the little girl cried happily as she saw Jess’s face appear. Her face was muffled through the glass.

“Hi Anna, hi Grace”, Jess greeted them, his earlier sorrow fading away slowly.

“Guess what? I get to go home!” Anna cheered and jumped up and down on the spot. Jess and Grace both smiled at her excitement.

“That’s awesome, Anna. I’m so happy for you.”

“Why are you in isolation?” Anna asked suddenly.

Jess chuckled at her childlike bluntness. “The chemo wasn’t working on me, so they had to do a more intense treatment. They had to isolate me so that I wouldn’t get any infections from the outside world”, Jess explained. He watched as Anna was trying to process the information. Grace whispered something to her ear that Jess couldn’t hear.

“Are you getting better now?” Anna asked.

“Yeah, I am slowly. But it’s gonna take weeks before I can leave.”

“That’s no fun”, Anna said with a pout.

“I know right. It sucks”, Jess chuckled. It was almost like magic how this little girl managed to lift his spirit so fast.

“I wish you all the best, Jess. It’s clear you’ve made quite an impression on Anna. Maybe we could meet up some time when you get discharged”, Grace chimed in, her hand resting on her daughter’s shoulder.

“Thank you. Anna has made an impression on me too. And we definitely should meet up. Anna would totally love meeting my girlfriend.”

Anna pouted again and her face twisted into a slight shock. “You have a girlfriend?”

Jess laughed softly at the child’s innocence. Grace had a similar expression on her face. “Yeah, I’m sorry Anna. But Rory is great. You would totally like her as well”, Jess comforted her.

“Fine. But only I’m allowed to hold your hand then.”

“Deal”, Jess smiled.

The three of them bid their goodbyes through the window. Jess found himself smiling long after Anna and Grace left. He was glad they managed to lift his spirit, if only momentarily.

Jess felt tiredness sweeping in his bones and he pulled the blanket up to his ears, hiding away from the world. He coughed a few times before sleep took him away from the tiny hospital room.

He wasn’t too sure how much time had passed when he woke up again. It was still raining heavily but the thunder had waned. There was a lunch tray on the side table and Jess grimaced at it. His appetite was still gone and the food looked less than appetizing.

Jess sighed and stared at the ceiling. The heavy feeling in his chest was back but this time Jess wasn’t sure if it was all in his head or was it actually there. He noticed his cough had intensified a bit. But he did feel the sadness sweeping in as well.

Before Jess could ponder on it too much, his door opened and Dr. Parker and another man in a white coat walked in. Jess had never seen the other man. He was young, in his late twenties maybe and he had blond hair and round glasses. That was pretty much all Jess could tell because a face mask was covering half of his face.

“Hello, Jess. This is my resident, Henry. I hope it’s alright he’s here.”

“It’s fine,” Jess answered, eyeing both of them slightly suspiciously.

“Perfect. How have you been feeling today?” Dr. Parker asked as they approached Jess’s bed. Jess pulled his blanket around himself tighter.

“Peachy.”

Dr. Parker hummed. “Henry, would you check Jess’s vitals?”

Henry stepped forward his face calm and determined. “Hello, Jess,” he said gently. “I’ll just be checking your pulse, temperature and listening to your lungs, okay?” Jess nodded but his eyes were wary. Henry pulled down Jess’s blanket and Jess shivered when his skin was exposed. Jess extended his arm reluctantly for Henry to take his pulse. Henry wrapped the cuff around Jess's arm and started to pump. Jess winced slightly, feeling the pressure.

“Your pulse is a bit elevated,” Henry observed after a moment, noting it down.

“Yeah, well, it’s exhausting just laying here,” Jess said dryly, his voice laced with sarcasm.

Henry smiled behind his mask, appreciating Jess’s attempt at humor. “Alright, let’s listen to those lungs.”

Jess sighed and adjusted his position slightly, allowing Henry to place the stethoscope on his chest. Henry listened intently, moving the stethoscope around to different spots. He frowned slightly as he heard congestion.

“Breath sounds are congested,” Henry said, glancing at Dr. Parker.

Dr. Parker nodded, his expression thoughtful. “Alright, Jess, we’re going to monitor that closely. It’s important that we keep an eye on any signs of infection, especially with your immune system being compromised.”

Henry took Jess’s temperature, placing the thermometer under his tongue. Jess sat there, feeling the familiar discomfort of being poked and prodded. After a few moments, Henry removed the thermometer and read the result.

“You’ve got a slight fever, Jess,” Henry said, his brow furrowing.

Dr. Parker looked at the chart, noting the consistent elevation in Jess’s temperature and pulse over the past few days. “Jess, your temperature has been up for several days now, and your pulse is elevated as well. We’re a bit concerned about these signs.”

Jess’s heart sank at the doctor’s words. He had been trying to ignore the worsening symptoms, but hearing it confirmed by the doctors made it impossible to deny. “What does that mean?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

Dr. Parker sighed, his expression serious but compassionate. “It means we need to be very vigilant. Your body is fighting hard, but these signs indicate that you might be developing an infection or that your body is under significant stress. We need to run some more tests to get a clearer picture of what’s going on.”

Jess felt a wave of frustration and fear wash over him. “I thought the transplant was supposed to make me better,” he muttered, his eyes closing as he tried to keep his emotions in check.

“It will, Jess,” Dr. Parker assured him. “But right now, your body is very vulnerable as it adjusts to the new cells. This is a critical time, and we need to address any complications as soon as they arise.”

Jess nodded, feeling a lump form in his throat. He wanted to be strong, but the constant pain and fear were wearing him down. “Okay,” he whispered.

“We’re going to do everything we can to help you through this,” Henry said gently. “We’ll take some blood samples and run some tests. In the meantime, we’ll adjust your medications to help with the fever.”

Jess nodded again, feeling the weight of the situation pressing down on him. He wished Luke was there. He didn’t like facing the new challenges alone and as much as Luke’s encouraging words had grinned his nerves sometimes, Jess knew Luke was just trying to make him feel better.

As Henry adjusted Jess's IV medications and prepared to take blood samples, Dr. Parker began explaining Jess's medical history to his resident. Jess listened, feeling a strange mix of detachment and discomfort as they discussed his treatments as if he weren't there.

"Jess was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia a year ago. He reached remission, but he had a relapse about two months ago. Jess also has a rare gene mutation GT48, which has some effects on his treatment, but the mutation mostly affects the side effects," Dr. Parker began, his voice calm and measured. "He underwent several rounds of chemotherapy, but unfortunately, his leukemia was resistant to treatment. Given his young age and the aggressive nature of the disease, a bone marrow transplant was deemed the best course of action."

Henry nodded, making notes as he worked. "And how did the transplant go?"

"The transplant itself went smoothly," Dr. Parker continued. "Jess's uncle, Luke, was a perfect match and donated his marrow. The procedure involved infusing Luke's healthy stem cells into Jess's bloodstream through a central venous catheter, which then migrated to his bone marrow to produce new, healthy blood cells."

Jess shifted uncomfortably, his eyes darting between the two doctors. Hearing his medical journey laid out so clinically felt surreal. It was his life they were talking about—his pain, his fear, his fight for survival.

"We monitored Jess closely for signs of graft-versus-host disease, a common complication where the donor cells attack the recipient's body," Dr. Parker explained. "Fortunately, we haven't seen any severe signs of GVHD, but his immune system is still very weak. That's why he's so vulnerable to infections right now."

Henry looked up from his notes, his expression serious. "So the elevated pulse and fever could be an early sign of an infection?"

"Exactly," Dr. Parker replied. "We need to identify the source of the infection quickly and start the appropriate treatment. Jess's body is already under immense stress, and any additional strain could be dangerous."

Jess felt a lump in his throat, the weight of their words pressing down on him. He knew the risks but hearing them laid out so plainly made everything feel more immediate, more real. He swallowed hard, trying to push down the rising tide of fear.

"We'll run a full panel of tests," Dr. Parker said, turning his attention to Jess. "Hang in there, Jess. We're going to do everything we can to get you through this."

Jess managed a weak nod, his body aching with fatigue and pain. "Okay," he whispered, his voice barely audible.

Henry finished drawing the blood samples and gave Jess a reassuring smile. "You're doing great, Jess. Just keep fighting, and we'll take care of the rest."

Jess closed his eyes, trying to find some comfort in their words. He wanted to believe them, wanted to trust that everything would be okay. But the fear lingered, a constant, gnawing presence in the back of his mind.

After they finished, Dr. Parker gave Jess a reassuring smile. “We’ll keep a close eye on you, Jess. If you need anything, just press the call button.”

As the doctors prepared to leave, Jess's weak voice stopped them. "I don't feel good," he whispered, his words barely more than a breath.

Dr. Parker paused and looked at Jess with concern. "Henry, could you step out for a moment?" he asked his resident.

Henry nodded and left the room, closing the door quietly behind him. Dr. Parker walked back to Jess's bedside and sat down, his expression softening. He could see the fear and exhaustion in Jess's eyes, the way his body seemed to curl in on itself as if trying to shield against the emotional turmoil he was facing.

"Jess," Dr. Parker began gently, "what's going on? Tell me what's really bothering you."

Jess shifted uncomfortably, his eyes avoiding Dr. Parker's. "I'm just… scared”, he said quietly. "The pain, the nausea, the fear of what's next. It's overwhelming."

Dr. Parker nodded, his heart aching for the young man in front of him. "It's completely understandable to feel scared, Jess. You've been through so much, and it's normal to have these fears. But you're not alone, even if it feels that way sometimes. We're all here for you, and we'll do everything we can to help you through this."

Jess sighed, his expression still guarded but his voice softening. "I know. It just feels like everything is piling up. And I was so used to Luke always being here. I didn’t know he was leaving already.”

Dr. Parker placed a comforting hand on Jess's shoulder. "I know it feels overwhelming, but you're stronger than you realize. You've already overcome so much. And it's okay to lean on others when you need to. You don't have to go through this alone."

Jess nodded slightly, taking in Dr. Parker's words. "Thanks," he said, his voice a bit steadier. "I guess it's just hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel right now."

Dr. Parker smiled kindly. "I understand. And we’ll do everything we can to make sure you get through this. Is there anything else we can do to make you more comfortable right now? If you’re feeling lonely, I could send Julie your way."

Jess nodded slightly. “Yes please”, he whispered.

"Of course. She’ll be here soon”, Dr. Parker replied softly. "Rest as much as you can, and we'll keep a close eye on you."

After leaving Jess’s room, Dr. Parker quickly found Julie and explained the situation. Understanding the emotional toll Jess was under, she made her way to his room, determined to offer some comfort and support.

Julie knocked gently before entering, a warm smile on her face. “Hey, Jess,” she greeted softly, walking over to his bed. “Mind if I keep you company for a while?”

Jess looked up, his eyes still heavy with fatigue but showing a glimmer of gratitude. “Sure,” he replied.

Julie pulled up a chair and sat down next to him, her presence calming and reassuring. “I know this has been really tough on you,” she began, her tone gentle. “You’ve been so strong through everything, but it’s okay to feel tired and scared.”

Jess sighed, his eyes staring at the ceiling. “It’s just hard. I’m tired of feeling sick all the time. And with Luke gone, it’s...lonely

”I understand. It’s tough not feeling your best constantly. But we’re all here to help you. And I’m sure Luke will be back soon.”

Jess nodded. “He didn’t say goodbye. He just left me a lousy note.”

Julie frowned, trying to find the right word. “He probably just didn’t want to wake you. He knows how much you need your rest”, Julie tried to reason with him. “Which reminds me, you should try to rest now. I’ll stay with you until you fall asleep.”

Jess’s eyes softened slightly at her words. He appreciated her presence, even if he didn’t fully express it. “Thanks, Julie,” he murmured, his voice barely audible.

Julie smiled, her heart aching for the boy who had been through so much. “Anytime, Jess,” she replied. “Just close your eyes and try to relax. I’ll be right here.”

Jess nodded and closed his eyes, his breathing gradually evening out as he settled into a more comfortable position. Julie stayed by his side, watching over him with a mix of concern and compassion.

As Jess drifted off to sleep, Julie continued to sit by his side. The room was quiet, the only sound the steady rhythm of Jess’s labored breathing.

Jess woke up abruptly, a harsh, rattling cough tearing through his chest. He barely had a moment to catch his breath before another fit overtook him. The coughing was relentless, each convulsion sending pain shooting through his body. The monitor next to his bed began to beep loudly, signaling distress. His eyes watered as he fought to catch a breath.

Within moments, Dr. Parker and Henry rushed into the room, their expressions tense. Dr. Parker immediately moved to Jess’s bedside, assessing the situation with practiced urgency.

“Jess, can you hear me?” Dr. Parker asked, his tone calm but authoritative. Jess could only nod weakly between coughs, his face flushed and eyes wide with fear.

Dr. Parker placed a stethoscope on Jess’s chest, listening intently to the congestion in his lungs. “His lungs are very congested. We need to clear this up,” he said, his voice firm. “Jess, we’re going to help you breathe easier. Just try to relax as much as you can.”

Jess struggled to focus on Dr. Parker's words, the constant coughing making it nearly impossible to do anything but fight for air.

Henry set up the nebulizer and placed the mask over Jess’s face, turning the machine on. “This will help open up your airways,” he explained. “Just breathe as deeply as you can.”

Jess tried to comply, taking shallow breaths through the mask. The medication began to work quickly, easing the tightness in his chest and slowing the relentless cough. Gradually, his breathing became less labored, and the beeping from the monitor began to stabilize.

Dr. Parker kept a close watch on Jess, his expression softening slightly as the boy’s condition started to improve. “That’s it, Jess. Just keep breathing. You’re doing great,” he said, offering encouragement.

After several tense minutes, Jess’s coughing subsided, and his breathing returned to a more regular rhythm. He slumped back against the pillows, utterly exhausted but grateful for the relief.

Dr. Parker and Henry exchanged relieved glances. “We’re going to keep a close eye on you, Jess,” Dr. Parker said.

Dr. Parker and Henry exchanged concerned glances as they moved a few steps away from Jess's bed, speaking in hushed tones. Jess’s eyelids fluttered, but his exhaustion quickly pulled him into a fitful sleep.

“I’m not liking what I’m seeing,” Dr. Parker whispered to Henry, his brow furrowed in worry. “Jess had pneumonia last time he was treated, and it landed him in the ICU for several days. I’d like to avoid that this time.”

Henry nodded, his expression serious. “His lungs are congested, and his vitals are all over the place. What’s the plan?”

Dr. Parker sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “We need to get ahead of this before it becomes critical. I think we should start him on a nasal cannula to ensure he’s getting enough oxygen. His saturation levels are too low for comfort.”

Henry agreed, jotting down notes. “And for the congestion?”

“I’m thinking a combination of heavy-duty medications to clear his airways,” Dr. Parker said. “We’ll start with nebulized bronchodilators and corticosteroids. If that doesn’t help, we may need to consider antibiotics as a precaution against any potential infections.”

“Got it,” Henry said, making a checklist. “I’ll prepare the medications and get the oxygen tube set up.”

Dr. Parker walked back to Jess’s bedside, gently adjusting the blankets around the boy’s shoulders. “Hang in there, Jess,” he murmured, more to himself than to the sleeping teenager.

Henry quickly assembled the necessary equipment, efficiently placing the nasal cannula in Jess’s nostrils and adjusting the flow of oxygen. The cool, steady stream of air seemed to help almost immediately, Jess’s breathing becoming a fraction easier.

Henry injected the bronchodilators into the nebulizer, the machine humming softly as it delivered the medication. Jess stirred slightly, his body relaxing as the drugs began to take effect, opening up his airways and making each breath less labored.

“This should help him to rest more peacefully. I’ll call his uncle and inform him of the situation. It’s a pity the boy’s condition deteriorated so quickly after he was left alone. Makes you almost think the two things are connected.”

Chapter Text

Luke had barely been away from the hospital for twelve hours when he got a call from Dr. Parker, saying that Jess was having trouble breathing and that they were worried that he’d get pneumonia again. Luke sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He had hoped that he could’ve crashed in his own bed tonight but instead, he ended up driving back to Hartford with a gnawing worry in his chest.

The hospital life had really taken a toll on the man. Seeing Jess so weak was so much harder than he thought it would be. He didn’t want to admit it, but he felt relieved when he closed the door behind him, knowing that he could be away from the environment for a while. He was looking forward to a peaceful day working at the diner, just how he liked it. Instead, he noticed that he was short on almost all of his ingredients and he had to deal with whiny customers all day long. So maybe it was a hidden grace when he got the call.

He found his nephew in his room, asleep with an oxygen tube up his nose again. Luke walked quietly to his bedside and stood next to it, examining Jess with his eyes. He had more monitors connected to him now and the wires were coming out from the collar of his loose light blue hospital pajama shirt. The monitors were flashing all kinds of numbers that Luke had no clue of. But at least he was here now.

He sat down and took Jess’s limp hand to his.

Jess stirred awake, though Luke wasn’t quite so sure that he was fully conscious. Maybe the strong medication was making him loopy. “Uncle Luke! You’re my favorite uncle”, Jess slurred. It almost sounded like he was drunk.

“Well, I’m your only uncle, but thanks. How’re you feeling kid?” Luke smiled slightly.

Jess sat down with surprisingly little effort. “I’m great! Never better. Hey, is it windy in here? I feel a breeze in my nose.”

“No kid. That’s your oxygen tube. You need it to help you breathe”, Luke explained but he knew Jess probably didn’t register much of it.

“Silly Luke, I can breathe. See?” Jess said and began pulling the tube from his nose. Luke quickly grabbed his wrist to stop him from disturbing the tube.

“You need to keep that in, bud.” Luke was still holding the boy’s wrist and Jess leaned forward and wrapped his other hand around Luke to hug him. Luke smiled and pulled the boy into a hug. Jess rested his head on Luke’s shoulder tiredly.

“I missed you Uncle Luke”, he mumbled into the older man’s shoulder.

“I missed you too kid”, Luke said and put his hand behind Jess’s neck. He didn’t like the heat that was radiating off the boy.

Jess coughed weakly, his eyes half-closed again. “I’m tired.”

“You just rest then. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

The night was long and filled with only light slumber for Luke. Every time Jess coughed or groaned or whimpered, he was alert and ready to get a nurse to help him. Surprisingly, Jess slept through the whole night despite him thrashing around on the small bed.

The morning couldn’t come quick enough for Luke. He yawned as he glanced at the clock. It read seven am. Jess stirred, his eyes slowly opening to the sight of Luke sitting beside him. Luke’s face lit up with a smile as he noticed Jess was more alert than before.

“Morning, kid,” Luke greeted, his voice warm with relief.

Jess blinked, adjusting to the light and the fogginess in his mind. “Morning,” he croaked, his voice rough from the previous day’s ordeal.

“How’re you feeling?” Luke asked, leaning in slightly.

Jess took a moment to assess himself. “Better, I think,” he said slowly. “Breathing’s easier.”

“That’s good to hear,” Luke said, his smile widening. “You were pretty out of it last night. Had us all worried.”

Jess managed a weak smile. “Sorry about that.”

“Hey, no need to apologize,” Luke replied, his tone light. “You know, you were kind of funny while you were loopy from the meds.”

Jess raised an eyebrow. “Oh really?”

“Yeah,” Luke chuckled. “You were asking if it was windy in here because you felt a breeze in your nose.”

Jess couldn’t help but laugh weakly. “I don’t remember that.”

“You were pretty out of it,” Luke said, still grinning. “But hey, it’s good to see you more alert. Means the treatment’s working.”

Jess nodded, feeling a bit more at ease. “Thanks for being here, Luke.”

“Always, kid,” Luke replied, giving Jess’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “You’re stuck with me.”

Jess fell silent for a while. “You left yesterday without telling me.”

“I know. I’m sorry kid. I wanted to tell you, but you were asleep. It’s not like I wanted to sneak out without you knowing.”

Jess nodded. “It’s alright. I was just confused.” He wasn’t about to confess how lonely and abandoned he had felt over that. It was completely stupid.

They sat in companionable silence for a moment, the beeping of the machines and the soft hum of the oxygen providing a soothing backdrop. Jess felt a bit more like himself, grateful for Luke’s unwavering presence and the improvement in his condition.

“You want some breakfast?” Luke asked, breaking the silence.

“Yeah, that’d be nice,” Jess replied, his stomach rumbling slightly.

“Alright, I’ll see if I can find you something better than the hospital stuff”, Luke said, standing up. “Don’t go anywhere.”

Jess rolled his eyes playfully. “I don’t think I’m going anywhere anytime soon.”

Luke chuckled and headed out of the room.

Jess sat up on the bed. He fumbled with the tube, trying to find a position that didn’t make it feel like a constant, annoying tickle against his nose. The effort only made it worse, and as he pulled at it a little too hard, the soft whooshing sound of air shifted. He sighed in frustration, resting his head back against the pillow.

Just then, the door creaked open, and Julie stepped inside. She raised an eyebrow as she caught sight of him fiddling with the tube.

“Jess Mariano,” she said in that familiar, gentle but firm tone she always used when he was being stubborn, “you know better than to mess with that.” She walked over to his bedside, her hands quick and practiced as she adjusted the oxygen tube back into place. “You want to breathe easy, right? Let me do my job.”

Jess sighed. “Yeah, yeah. It was just bugging me.”

Julie smiled softly as she checked his vitals, her hands moving with the ease of someone who had done this a million times before. “I get it, but trust me, a little discomfort now is better than the alternative.” She gave him a knowing look.

Jess nodded, though he felt the discomfort of the situation more than the tube. He hated this—being stuck in the hospital, feeling weak and helpless, like his body had betrayed him yet again. He glanced at the IV stand, the tubes running from his arm, and the heart monitor beeping softly next to him. Every reminder of how out of control he was.

“How are you feeling?” Julie asked, her tone softer now, less nurse-like and more concerned. “The infection seems to be responding to the treatment, but I know it’s rough.”

Jess hesitated. “I’ve been better,” he admitted. “It just feels like it never ends.”

Julie gave him a sympathetic smile. “I know it’s tough, Jess. But believe me when I say that it will get better.”

Jess forced a small smile, but he didn’t really believe it. “Yeah, well, let’s hope my body gets the message soon.”

Julie chuckled softly and gave his arm a reassuring squeeze. “You’re doing everything you can. Let us take care of the rest, okay?” She finished her checks and adjusted his blankets. “And leave the oxygen alone, alright?”

Jess gave a half-hearted thumbs up. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll be good.”

As Julie left the room, Jess sank back into the pillows, his eyes growing heavy again. He was exhausted, his body aching and his mind buzzing with thoughts he didn’t have the energy to fully process. He glanced at the clock, wondering when Luke would be back, hoping the food might give him something to focus on besides the constant pain and fatigue.

Not long after, Luke returned to the room carrying a tray with a sandwich and a glass of orange juice. He set it down on the table beside Jess’s bed and helped him sit up slightly so he could eat more comfortably.

“Here you go,” Luke said, handing Jess the sandwich. “It’s not gourmet, but it should do the trick.”

Jess took the sandwich and took a tentative bite. “Thanks, Luke.”

Luke watched Jess eat, his own exhaustion becoming more apparent with each passing moment. He stifled a yawn, but it didn’t go unnoticed by Jess.

“You didn’t sleep much last night, did you?” Jess asked, his voice tinged with concern.

Luke shrugged, trying to downplay it. “I’ve had worse nights.”

Jess frowned. “You look exhausted. You should go home and get some rest. I’ll be fine on my own for a bit.”

Luke shook his head. “I’m not leaving you alone, Jess. You caught an infection the second I left last time.”

“Luke, seriously,” Jess insisted, his tone firm. “I appreciate everything you’re doing, but you need to take care of yourself too. I’m feeling better, and the nurses and doctors are here if I need anything.”

Luke hesitated, clearly torn. “I don’t know…”

“Please,” Jess urged. “For me? I don’t want you to get sick because you’re not taking care of yourself.”

Luke sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Alright, alright. But I’m just a phone call away. You call me if you need anything, got it?”

Jess nodded. “Got it. Now go get some rest.”

Luke gave Jess’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “You take it easy, okay?”

“No, I think I’ll run the marathon”, Jess said sarcastically.

With one last look at Jess, Luke reluctantly gathered his things and headed for the door. “I’ll be back later,” he said, his voice soft with concern.

“I know,” Jess replied, offering a small smile. “Thanks, Luke.”

After Luke left, the room felt quieter, almost too quiet. Jess finished his sandwich and lay back against the pillows, trying to relax. Just as he was about to doze off, his phone buzzed on the table beside him. He picked it up, seeing Rory's name flashing on the screen.

"Hey, Rory," Jess answered, his voice a bit hoarse.

"Jess! Are you okay?" Rory's voice was filled with concern. "I heard you had trouble breathing last night. Why didn't anyone call me?"

"I'm okay now," Jess reassured her, though he could hear the worry in her voice. "It was rough, but the doctors took care of it. I'm feeling a bit better this morning."

Rory let out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. "I was so scared when I heard. I wanted to come over right away, but I was at my grandparents' house helping Grandma organize something. I'll be there soon, I promise."

"It's alright, Rory," Jess said, trying to sound more upbeat. "You don't have to rush. I'm doing better. Just take your time and come when you can."

"No, I'm coming as soon as I can," Rory insisted. "I need to see you. I can't stand the thought of you being there alone."

"I'm not alone," Jess pointed out. "The nurses and doctors are here, and Luke was with me all night. He just left to get some rest."

Rory sighed. "Still, I want to be there for you. You've been through so much, and I hate that I wasn't there when you needed me."

"Rory, it's okay," Jess repeated, his tone gentle. "I know you're here for me. Just knowing that helps a lot."

"I'm coming over," Rory said firmly. "Just hold on a little longer, okay?"

"I will," Jess promised. "I'll be here waiting."

"Good," Rory replied, her voice softening. "I'll see you soon, Jess. Hang in there."

"See you soon," Jess echoed, feeling a bit of relief at the thought of seeing Rory.

He put the phone down and settled back against the pillows, feeling a bit more at ease. The promise of seeing Rory soon brought a small smile to his face. He closed his eyes, trying to rest while he waited for her arrival.

Rory hadn’t given him a time, so Jess had been anticipating her visit since the morning. He managed to down some of his horrible meatloaf just because he figured he could use the energy for when she would come see him. He then proceeded to practice some card tricks with the deck of cards Lorelai and Rory had given him when he first came into the isolation room. He wanted to perfect the trick he had been working on for a while so he could show it to Rory. He bet she’d like it and making Rory smile was his favorite thing to do.

Dr. Parker visited him and noted that everything was looking good. Jess performed the trick for him and the doctor was genuinely amused. “You’ve got a talent, Jess”, he had said before exiting the room.

Any minute now, he’d see Rory’s cute face coming through the door and her face lighting up as she would see him. And maybe Luke would follow shortly after her and his face would pull into a smile as he’d see Jess sitting there, looking better. But every time he looked at the clock, the hands seemed to move slower, each minute stretching into an eternity.

As the hours ticked by, Jess's anticipation grew. He kept glancing at the door, expecting Rory to walk in at any moment. Every time footsteps echoed in the hallway, his heart would skip a beat, only to sink when it was just a nurse or another doctor making their rounds. He was growing impatient. Rory had said she’d come straight away, right? What if something had happened? Was she okay?

By mid-afternoon, hope began to falter. Jess tried to reassure himself, thinking of all the reasons Rory might be delayed. Maybe she got stuck in traffic or had an unexpected errand to run. He watched some TV, trying to distract himself, but his eyes kept darting to the door. He fidgeted with the cards in his hand anxiously.

As the sun began to set, Jess felt a tight knot of disappointment form in his chest. The usual sounds of the hospital—beeping monitors, distant conversations, the occasional page over the intercom—became a background hum to his growing despondency. She promised to come. She insisted she’d come. So why hadn’t she?

Visiting hours were nearing their end, and Jess's hope was all but gone. He told himself it was silly to feel this way, that Rory must have a good reason for not showing up. But the loneliness and the sense of abandonment were hard to shake.

When Emily came in to check his vitals one last time for the evening, Jess asked, “Are visiting hours over now?”

Emily nodded sympathetically. “I’m afraid so, Jess. But maybe she’ll come tomorrow.”

Jess nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat. “Yeah, maybe,” he muttered, trying to sound nonchalant.

As the nurse left, turning off the main lights and leaving only the dim bedside lamp on, Jess curled up under his blanket. The room felt emptier than ever. The excitement that had carried him through the day was now replaced by a deep sadness. He felt like a little kid. A distant memory played in his head.

The school auditorium was buzzing with excitement. Parents filled the folding chairs in neat rows, chatting with each other as they waited for the play to begin. Jess stood backstage, peeking out from behind the curtain. His heart raced, not from stage fright but from the anticipation of seeing his mom in the audience.

Liz had promised him—promised—that she would be there. She even told him to look out for her in the front row, where she’d be waving and cheering louder than anyone.

Jess adjusted his cardboard crown, the one he'd made in class the week before. It felt a little crooked, but he didn't care. He just wanted her to see him.

"Alright, everyone, places!" the teacher called, clapping her hands. The kids scurried into their positions, and Jess took his place on the edge of the stage, keeping one eye on the audience as they dimmed the lights.

The curtain rose, and the play began. He recited his lines perfectly, just like he had rehearsed. But every time he glanced out into the crowd, he couldn’t find her. The front row was packed with other moms and dads, none of them Liz. His throat tightened, but he kept going, pretending like it didn’t matter. He thought maybe she was late. Maybe she was stuck in traffic, or she’d walk in any minute.

But she didn’t.

By the time the play ended, Jess’s excitement had turned to a sinking feeling in his chest. The other kids ran off stage to find their parents, their faces glowing with pride and excitement. Jess stayed back, lingering in the corner, his eyes scanning the faces one last time.

Still nothing.

The teacher gave him a soft smile as she helped the kids clean up their costumes. "Jess, do you need help finding your mom?"

"No, she’s probably just busy," Jess mumbled, looking down at his feet, his voice small. He took off the crown and crumpled it in his hands.

He waited a little longer, even after most of the kids had left. Eventually, the janitor started folding up the chairs, and Jess knew it was time to go. He stuffed his crown into his backpack and slipped out the side door, his hands shoved deep in his pockets, trying to convince himself it wasn’t a big deal.

But as he walked home alone, the disappointment gnawed at him. She always did this. She always said she’d be there, and she never was.

And no matter how hard he tried to brush it off, it still hurt.

He should’ve known better. He should’ve learned his lesson a long time ago, back when he was a kid and his mom would promise him things, only for those promises to dissolve into nothing. But this time, it was different. It was Rory. She wasn’t like his mom. She kept her promises. She wouldn’t just forget about him, wouldn’t leave him hanging like this

Jess clenched his jaw, blinking up at the fluorescent lights above. The same old ache settled in his chest, a gnawing loneliness that had been with him for as long as he could remember. He felt foolish for believing, for hoping that this time might be different. It never was.

Finally, Jess couldn’t bear it any longer and he picked up his phone and dialed Rory's number. She answered after a few rings, her voice noticeably tired and strained.

“Hey, Rory,” Jess said, trying to keep his tone light despite the hurt gnawing at him. “I’ve been waiting for you. Everything okay?”

Rory sighed heavily on the other end of the line. “Jess, I’m sorry. I just had a really bad day. I had a bad fight with Grandma, and I couldn’t make it.”

Jess felt a twinge of frustration but tried to push it aside. “I get it, Rory. But you promised to come today. I was waiting the entire day.”

Her response came sharper than he expected. “Jess, we have more to our lives than just you and your illness, okay? I’m sorry I couldn’t come, but I have my own stuff to deal with.”

Her words hit Jess like a punch to the gut. For a moment, he was speechless, the phone pressed tightly against his ear. He didn’t know what to say or what to feel. Angry? Sad? Disappointed? He was all of those feelings at once.

“Well, that’s great that you do Rory. But I don’t. This is my whole life. And I’m sorry for wanting a distraction from it in the form of you visiting me. It’s not like I’m demanding it all day every day but you promised to come. It’s the only time I feel normal. But if you’re busy living your life, don’t mind me. I’ll be here. It’s not like I can leave anyway.”

Rory sighed again, but there was a hint of remorse in her voice. “Jess, I didn’t mean it like that. I’m just... overwhelmed. I’ll come see you tomorrow, okay?”

Jess swallowed hard, trying to keep his emotions in check. “Yeah, sure. Tomorrow.”

“Okay. Get some rest, Jess,” Rory said, her tone softer now. “We’ll talk tomorrow.”

As he hung up the phone, Jess stared at the ceiling, feeling the ache of disappointment settle deeper in his chest. He knew Rory had her own battles, but it didn’t make the loneliness any easier to bear.  She had sounded angry. Jess hated it when people were mad at him. Even more so when he didn’t know why they were mad. Had he been too demanding? But it was Rory who insisted that she’d come over. Why hadn’t she texted him that she couldn’t make it? And why didn’t she tell him what was up?

Sleep didn’t come easy that night despite his exhaustion. He kept pondering the questions that filled his head, hoping to understand what he did wrong. Because certainly it was something. Everything was always his fault, after all.

The next day, Rory and Luke came to visit as promised, but Jess could immediately tell something was off. Instead of the usual warmth and relief he’d feel when seeing them, there was a heaviness in the air—a tension that made Jess’s stomach churn.

Rory looked tired, and Luke’s jaw was set in a hard line. Jess's excitement about the visit vanished, replaced by a gnawing anxiety that twisted inside his chest. Had he done something wrong? Jess clenched his hands to stop them from shaking.

“Hi, guys,” he greeted them cautiously. The deck of cards he had so excitedly wanted to show tricks with now lay abandoned on the side table.

"Hey, kid," Luke replied, his tone neutral, but there was a tightness in his voice. "How’re you feeling?"

Jess shrugged. "Same. Still here, still waiting. Any news on when I can leave?"

Luke shook his head, running a hand over his face. "No, nothing yet. Dr. Parker says you need more time to recover, for your body to start producing cells on its own."

Jess sighed, feeling the weight of those words settle into his bones. "Right. More of this." He gestured vaguely to the hospital room, the confinement, the beeping machines. It felt endless.

Rory, who had been quiet until now, let out a small, bitter sigh. "Jess, do you have any idea how hard this is for everyone? You're not the only one stuck in a difficult situation here."

Jess’s heart sank. He could feel the tension building, but Rory’s words cut deeper than he expected. "I know, but—"

"No buts," Rory interrupted sharply, her voice taking on an edge that felt unfamiliar. "We've all been bending over backward to support you. The least you could do is show a little appreciation instead of acting like such a brat."

Jess's eyes widened in shock. He hadn’t expected that. Not from her. Not now. "I'm not trying to be ungrateful. I'm just... frustrated. I’m the one who’s stuck in a hospital bed."

Luke suddenly snapped. "Frustrated?" His voice was louder than usual, the calm veneer he normally maintained cracking wide open. "You think you’re the only one who's frustrated? You think this is easy for any of us? I’ve been here day in, day out with you, Jess. My diner’s going under because I’m never there, and you can't even show a shred of gratitude? All you do is act like you’re the only one going through something."

Jess felt his body tense, his fingers digging into the hospital blanket. Luke’s words stung, but instead of retreating, he instinctively pushed back. "Gratitude? For what, exactly? Being stuck in this room while everyone else goes on with their lives? For feeling like I’m a burden on everyone I care about?"

Rory’s eyes flashed with anger. "A burden? Jess, no one said you’re a burden. But you have no idea how exhausting it is to deal with you when you’re like this. You're so self-absorbed, you don’t even realize how much we're all sacrificing to be here for you."

Jess’s voice rose defensively, tears stinging the corners of his eyes, but he refused to let them fall. "Self-absorbed? I’m stuck here! What am I supposed to do? Pretend like everything’s fine when it’s not? You all act like this is some temporary thing, like I’ll just get out of here and everything will go back to normal, but what if it doesn’t?"

Luke threw his hands up, pacing the small space at the foot of the bed. "You think we don’t worry about that? You think I haven’t spent every damn day stressing about what’ll happen to you? About whether or not you’re going to be okay? You’re not the only one dealing with the unknown, Jess!"

"Well, it sure feels like I am!" Jess fired back, his voice trembling with barely contained emotion. "You all get to leave at the end of the day. You get to go back to your lives. I can’t."

Luke’s patience snapped completely, his voice harsh. "You think we’re living some dream life outside these walls? Rory’s breaking down trying to juggle everything, Lorelai’s worried sick, and I’m losing sleep every damn night because I’m scared something’s going to happen to you. You’re impossible when you’re like this, Jess. No one can say or do anything right around you."

Jess’s fists clenched in the blankets, his knuckles white. He felt the familiar urge to lash out, to push them away before they could hurt him more, but his voice cracked when he spoke. "Then why do you even bother coming? If I’m such a pain to be around, then just stop. Go live your lives. I’ll be fine on my own."

Rory shook her head, her face twisted with frustration and exhaustion. "You don’t get it, do you? We come because we care. But it’s hard, Jess. It’s really hard when you act like nothing we do is good enough. We’re all tired, and you’re making everything so much harder than it needs to be."

Jess swallowed hard, blinking rapidly to keep the tears from falling. His chest felt tight, and his throat ached from holding back everything he wanted to say but couldn’t. "Maybe I don’t need you here, then," he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. "If all you’re going to do is yell at me... just leave."

Luke’s face twisted, a mix of anger and guilt flashing in his eyes. He took a step back, as if realizing what had just happened, but he was too far gone now. "Fine. If that’s what you want, Jess. I’ll leave."

The words hung heavy in the air, colder than Jess had imagined. Luke turned and stormed out, the door slamming shut behind him with a force that made Jess flinch. The sound echoed in the room, leaving a suffocating silence in its wake.

Rory stayed behind, her arms crossed tightly over her chest. She didn’t look as angry as before, but the hurt was still there, etched into the lines of her face. "We love you, Jess," she said, her voice strained. "But you have to start seeing beyond yourself. This isn’t just about you anymore."

With that, she turned and walked out, her footsteps fading down the hall until Jess was left alone in the sterile quiet of the hospital room.

The silence that followed was deafening. Jess felt a pang of guilt but quickly buried it beneath his anger and frustration. There was no way he deserved any of that. Okay, maybe he was a little self-centered at times, but it was only because he was stuck in this tiny room by himself. He was his only companion. But he made sure to think about others too, like when he told Luke to go home yesterday. That wasn’t selfish, right? And he didn’t think he was that much more difficult than normal. How was he difficult anyway? By telling them not to worry about him and that he would be fine on his own? He didn’t get it.

He told himself he didn’t care. That he didn’t need them. But as the room closed in around him, and the weight of their words settled heavily on his chest, Jess couldn’t stop the tear that slipped down his cheek.

Jess pulled the blanket over his head in an attempt to hide from anyone and everyone. The fabric muffled the sounds of the hospital, creating a cocoon of silence around him. He lay there, motionless, his mind racing with thoughts and emotions he couldn't control. The argument replayed in his mind, each harsh word and frustrated glance cutting deeper.

He thought about Rory's sharp words, the way she had snapped at him. It felt like a betrayal, a reminder that his illness was a burden not just to him but to everyone around him. He understood she had her own life, her own struggles, but it didn't lessen the sting of her absence.

And Luke – his steady, dependable Luke – had lost his patience too. Jess had always looked up to his uncle, seen him as a pillar of strength. But now, he felt like he had disappointed him, let him down by not being strong enough himself.

Jess's thoughts spiraled, the loneliness and despair wrapping around him like a vice. He wished he could escape, wished he could be anywhere but here. The hospital room felt like a prison, each beep of the machines a reminder of his frailty.

Hours passed, the blanket still pulled over his head. Jess didn't move, didn't acknowledge the nurses when they came in to check on him. He just wanted to be left alone, to wallow in his misery without interruption.

Eventually, the door creaked open, and Jess heard the soft footsteps of someone entering the room. He didn’t bother to peek out from under the blanket, hoping whoever it was would leave him in peace.

"Jess?" a familiar voice called softly. It was Julie. Her tone was gentle, filled with concern. "Are you awake?"

Jess didn’t respond. He kept his face buried beneath the covers, feeling like if he stayed hidden, maybe the world couldn’t touch him. Maybe the hurt couldn’t reach him. The mattress shifted slightly as Julie sat down beside his bed. He could feel her presence now, a warmth that contrasted sharply with the cold, lonely space his mind had retreated to.

“I’m sorry about what happened,” Julie said quietly, her voice soft but earnest.

Jess didn’t move. His voice, when it came, was muffled by the blanket but still carried the weight of his hurt. "They think I’m ungrateful. That I don’t care about what they’re doing for me."

Julie hesitated for a moment, then reached out, her hand resting gently on his arm. "Jess, they’re scared. Sometimes when people are scared, they don’t know how to handle it, and they end up saying things they don’t mean, or things that hurt more than they should."

Slowly, Jess turned his head just enough to look at her, his eyes brimming with unshed tears. His voice cracked when he spoke, the vulnerability in it impossible to miss. "I just... I just wanted to see them. I wanted to feel normal for a little while. I practiced this stupid card trick because I thought it would make Rory smile. I thought... maybe it would make her forget how awful things are, just for a minute." His throat tightened, and he looked away. "But instead, they came in here and made me feel like I’m nothing but a burden to them."

Julie’s heart ached at the sight of him, so broken and defeated. "Jess, you’re not a burden. Not to them, and not to anyone. What you’re going through is unbelievably hard, and it’s okay to be hurt, okay to feel this way. It doesn’t mean they don’t love you. It just means they’re not always the best at showing it."

Jess let out a shaky breath, his chest rising and falling unevenly. "This... this is so hard, Julie," he whispered, his voice barely holding steady. "Being stuck here, feeling like I’m falling apart, and then having the people I love—" He paused, his voice breaking. "—the people I need the most... be mad at me like I’m making everything worse."

Julie nodded, her eyes soft with understanding. "It is hard. It’s so hard, Jess. And it’s okay to admit that. But you have to talk to them, too. They might not see how much you’re hurting if you don’t tell them. They’re trying, but they can’t always get it right."

Jess swallowed, wiping a hand roughly across his face as if he could push away the tears that threatened to spill. He hated how vulnerable he felt, hated that he couldn’t just shake this off. But Julie’s words made sense, even though everything inside him wanted to shut down and push everyone away. He didn’t want to be alone, but he didn’t know how to not be, either.

"I just... I don’t want them to hate me," Jess whispered after a long pause. "I don’t want to make things worse."

Julie gave his arm a comforting squeeze, her voice filled with quiet reassurance. "They don’t hate you. They’re frustrated and tired, but they don’t hate you. They love you, even when they’re upset. And they’re probably just as scared of losing you as you are of pushing them away."

Jess’s breath hitched in his chest, and he closed his eyes, letting her words sink in.

Julie’s voice broke through the heavy silence. "For now, try to get some rest. I’ll be right here if you need anything."

Jess didn’t respond, but he nodded slightly, the weight of the day pressing down on him like never before. As Julie stood up to leave, she glanced back at him, her heart aching for the boy who had spent too long feeling like he had to carry everything on his own.

As the door clicked shut, Jess lay there in the dim light of the room, the rawness of the fight still burning in his chest. He thought about Rory’s words, Luke’s frustration, the slammed door. Maybe Julie was right. Maybe they didn’t hate him. But it didn’t stop the ache inside, the nagging feeling that no matter how hard he tried, he’d always end up disappointing the people who mattered most.

Jess closed his eyes, trying to steady his emotions. He knew the conversation with Luke and Rory wasn’t going to be easy, but it was necessary. He needed them, and they needed to understand that he wasn’t just angry – he was scared and hurting.

Sleep eventually claimed him, but his dreams were restless, filled with fragmented images of arguments and loneliness.

Chapter Text

Two days passed with Jess getting no visitors. His physical state slowly improved and he was taken off from the additional oxygen. His fever subsidized and his other vitals stabilized or moved in the direction the medical staff wanted to. So, everything was fine then? Not quite.

Jess spent his time lying still on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He didn’t eat and he barely acknowledged his doctors or nurses when they came to check on him. The lively, sarcastic spark that once defined him seemed extinguished, leaving behind a shell of the person he used to be.

Jess’s sudden change in demeanor worried everyone. The kid was like a zombie. He didn’t react when the nurses were taking his vitals or when they pierced him with needles. No one knew what to do. It was like the boy was mentally gone and only his body was left behind on the hospital bed.

Julie had been trying to cheer him up with little success. As she entered his room, she sighed as she saw Jess in the exact same position as before. She approached his bed slowly. The boy’s eyes remained on the ceiling.

"Hi, sweetie," Julie said softly, her voice almost a whisper. "No call yet?"

Jess shook his head, but the movement was barely noticeable.

"Maybe you could try calling again?" she suggested, though she already knew what his answer would be.

“I already did,” he said, his voice flat and hollow. "No answer."

Julie sighed and placed her hand on his arm, her heart breaking for him. She had seen plenty of patients, but it was the ones who had lost hope, the ones who stopped fighting, that worried her the most. And that was what Jess looked like now—like someone who had given up.

“I’m sorry, Jess. I know this is hard,” she said, trying to meet his gaze, but his eyes stayed locked on the ceiling.

There was a long pause before Jess spoke, his voice barely above a whisper. "I just thought... I thought they’d be here for me." His words trembled, carrying the weight of a lifetime of broken promises and disappointments.

Julie’s chest tightened as she heard the pain in his voice. She gently squeezed his hand. "They care about you, Jess. I know it doesn’t feel like it right now, but sometimes people don’t know how to handle their own pain. It doesn't mean they don’t love you."

Jess swallowed hard, his throat tightening as he fought back the tears. He had cried enough already. "Why does it always feel like this?" His voice cracked. "Like I’m not enough for anyone to stay. Like I don’t matter."

Julie felt tears prick her own eyes, but she pushed them back. This wasn’t about her. "Oh, Jess," she whispered. "You matter. So much. But sometimes, people get so caught up in their own fears and struggles that they forget how much others need them. It’s not fair, and it’s not your fault."

Jess finally turned to look at her, his eyes red-rimmed and filled with unshed tears. "I’m so tired of people leaving, Julie. I just wanted them to be here. Just this once."

His words hit her like a punch in the gut. She could hear the years of abandonment behind them, the countless times he had been let down, left behind. Julie felt her own tears break free, but she kept her voice steady for him. "I know you’re tired, Jess. And I’m sorry you’ve had to go through that. But I’m not leaving, okay? I’m here, and I’m going to stay right here as long as you need me."

Jess squeezed her hand back, but it was weak, almost like he was too drained to even hold on. "Thanks," he whispered, his voice raw with emotion. "But it’s not the same."

Julie nodded, blinking back the tears that threatened to spill over. "I know it’s not. But you don’t have to go through this alone." She was used to comforting her young patients and she prided herself on it. But Jess’s situation was different. The boy was so broken and even when he often tried to hide it, it was moments like this that revealed the real situation.

“Now, how about we try to get you to eat something? Even just a little bit?”

Jess hesitated. Yes, he was hungry. But did the anxiety pooling in his stomach let him eat? No. “I can’t”, he mumbled.

Julie’s eyes saddened. “Jess dear, you haven’t eaten in days.”

Jess remained silent, biting his lip. He knew he was upsetting Julie. That seemed to be the only thing he could do lately. “I’m sorry”, he said barely audible.

Julie sighed, her concern deepening as she watched Jess struggle. “Jess, you don’t need to apologize. I just want you to take care of yourself.”

Jess nodded, but the weight of his guilt and anxiety kept him silent. He felt trapped in a cycle of disappointment and sadness, unable to break free.

“I know things have been tough,” Julie continued softly. “But you need to eat to regain your strength. How about we start with something small? Maybe some soup?”

Jess sighed, feeling the battle within himself. He knew she was right, but his emotions were a tangled mess. “I’ll try,” he finally whispered, his voice wavering.

Julie smiled gently and stood up. “That’s all I ask. I’ll go get something for you. Just a few bites, okay?”

Jess nodded, watching her leave the room.

Julie returned a few minutes later with a small bowl of soup. She set it on the table next to Jess’s bed and helped him sit up. “Here you go. Just take it slow.”

Jess took the spoon and hesitated before bringing it to his lips. The warm liquid was comforting, but the knots in his stomach made it hard to enjoy. He forced himself to take a few more sips, aware of Julie’s watchful eyes.

“You’re doing great,” she encouraged, her voice soothing.

Jess managed a small smile, grateful for her patience. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome, Jess. And remember, we’re all here for you. Luke and Rory included. They’re just worried about you.”

Jess nodded, the words sinking in. He wanted to believe it, to hold onto the hope that things could get better. But the sadness and anxiety were like a heavy fog, obscuring his path forward.

As he finished the small bowl of soup, he felt a bit of the weight lift. The warmth of the soup chased away some of the anxiety settling in his stomach, almost like a hug from the inside. As he leaned back on the bed and pulled the blanket tighter around himself, his mind began to clear.

“I think I’m ready to talk to them,” Jess said quietly, looking at Julie.

She smiled warmly, her eyes filled with encouragement. “That’s a brave step, Jess. I’m proud of you.”

Jess nodded, feeling a small spark of resolve. He closed his eyes, ready to sleep better than he had in days with the help of the small hope he was feeling.

Julie felt incredibly sad for Jess. It was hard for her to understand how Jess’s loved ones could be so cruel when they knew how much Jess was struggling. That’s why she dialed Luke’s number after she stepped out of Jess’s room.

“Hello Luke. This is Julie from Hartford Children’s Hospital.”

“Hi Julie. How’s Jess doing?”

“Physically, Jess is doing better. His lungs are no longer congested and he’s breathing on his own. But I’m more concerned about his mental well-being. He has been awfully quiet the past few days and all he’s done is lay on his bed. He seems to be quite upset over what happened.”

There was a pause on the other end before Luke responded, frustration creeping into his tone. “Jess told us to stay away. So, we are giving him space.”

Julie frowned, her empathy for Jess deepening. “Is that so? To me, Jess seems quite the opposite, like he is craving support from his loved ones. It seems like it’s eating him alive.”

Luke sighed heavily, the weight of his own emotions pressing down on him. “I don’t know what to do, Julie. He’s so stubborn and pushes us away. We thought giving him space was what he wanted.”

“Sometimes people say things they don’t mean when they’re hurt or scared,” Julie replied gently. “He needs you, Luke. Even if he doesn’t say it outright, he needs to know you’re there for him.”

Luke was silent for a moment, processing Julie’s words. “You think going back will help?”

“I do,” Julie said firmly. “He’s feeling isolated and abandoned. Having you there, showing him that you care, will make a world of difference.”

Luke nodded slowly, though Julie couldn’t see it. “Alright. I’ll come by tomorrow. And I’ll talk to Rory too. Maybe we can figure this out together.”

“Good,” Julie said with relief. “Jess needs his family right now. Thank you, Luke.”

“Thank you for looking out for him, Julie,” Luke replied. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

The next day, as Jess was attempting to finish his breakfast, he heard a familiar voice at the door. He looked up to see Rory standing there, her face a mix of guilt and concern.

“Hey,” she said softly, stepping into the room. She was wearing a burgundy t-shirt and flare jeans, looking as cute as ever.

Jess’s heart skipped a beat. He wanted to be angry, but the relief of seeing her was overwhelming. For three days now he had been praying to see her walk through that door. He had thought about exactly what he was going to say. But now that she was there, he forgot every single word, except: “Hey.”

Rory approached his bedside, sitting down on the chair beside him. Her eyes searched his face, and she could tell just how much she had hurt him. “Jess, I’m so sorry,” she began, her voice shaky. “I messed up. I’ve been dealing with a lot, but that doesn’t excuse how I treated you.”

Jess stared down at his hands, which were gripping the edges of the blanket. He wanted to stay mad, but the truth was, he was just relieved to see her. “It really hurt,” he admitted, his voice low but steady. “You and Luke… the way you both acted, it made me feel like I was nothing. Like I was just… a burden.”

Rory’s eyes filled with tears, her heart aching at his words. She reached out and took his hand, her grip firm but gentle. “You’re not a burden, Jess. I know it must have felt like that, and I hate that I made you feel that way. It wasn’t fair.”

Jess finally looked up at her, his eyes sad but full of the love he still carried for her. “I just missed you, Rory. I didn’t understand why you weren’t here. I thought I did something wrong.”

Rory’s voice cracked as she spoke. “No, Jess. You didn’t do anything wrong. I just… I was overwhelmed and tired and I didn’t handle it the way I should have.”

Jess fidgeted with his hands on his lap. “No, you didn’t. But I know you’re stressed over the situation, and I know I’m not the only one going through a tough time. I’m sorry if I’ve been acting bratty.”

“You haven’t been bratty. You’ve been such a trooper through all of this, and I don’t even know why I said it. I know I’d be acting a lot worse than you if I was in your position.”

Jess was trying to come to terms with Rory’s apology. She had really hurt him in a way Jess thought that she never would. He had felt sad and abandoned for the past three days that she wasn’t there, and nothing could ever take that back. But she was also the person Jess loved the most in the whole world. He knew she wasn’t perfect and now he was just happy she had realized how much she had hurt him, and she’d come to make amends.

“But I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere.”

Jess nodded, his anger fading into the background. He squeezed her hand tightly, grateful she was finally there, even if the hurt still lingered. “I’m glad you’re here,” he whispered.

Rory wiped away a tear, her gaze locked on his. “I’ll do better, Jess. I promise.”

He gave her a small, tired smile. “That’s all I needed to hear.”

Though the pain wasn’t entirely gone, the warmth of having Rory by his side again was enough to start healing the cracks. And in that moment, Jess knew he wasn’t alone anymore.

They sat in silence for a moment, the weight of their emotions hanging in the air. But for the first time in days, Jess felt a glimmer of hope. Maybe things weren’t perfect, but he wasn’t alone. And that was enough.

Rory gently wiped her eyes and smiled at him, her love and support radiating through the room. Jess felt a warmth spread through his chest, a feeling he hadn’t experienced in a while. He wasn’t just a patient in a hospital bed; he was someone who mattered, someone who was loved.

Rory climbed onto the bed next to Jess, carefully maneuvering around the tubes and wires. She settled beside him, her body close but gentle, as if she were afraid to hurt him. Jess felt her warmth, a stark contrast to the cold sterility of the hospital room. She reached out, her fingers lightly tracing the back of his hand before intertwining with his.

"Is this okay?" she asked softly, her eyes searching his.

Jess nodded, feeling a lump form in his throat. "Yeah, it's more than okay."

Rory shifted closer, her free hand coming up to gently touch his cheek. "I missed you so much," she whispered. "I kept thinking about you, worrying about you. It tore me apart to stay away."

Jess swallowed hard, his emotions threatening to overwhelm him. "I missed you too. Every minute felt like an eternity without you here."

Rory’s eyes filled with tears again, but she smiled through them. "I’m here now. I’m not going anywhere."

They lay there together, the silence between them filled with unspoken words of love and support. Rory's presence was a balm to Jess's weary soul, easing the ache of loneliness and fear. Her touch was gentle, her fingers lightly brushing his hair, his forehead, his cheek. Each touch was a reminder that he wasn’t alone, that he was loved.

Jess turned his head slightly, his eyes meeting hers. "I’m sorry I made you worry."

Rory shook her head. "You have nothing to apologize for. I should have been here sooner. I should have...I should have been stronger for you."

Jess squeezed her hand. "You’re here now, and that’s all that matters."

Rory nodded, her eyes never leaving his. "I love you, Jess."

A small, genuine smile broke through Jess's weary facade. "I love you too, Rory."

They stayed like that for a while, holding each other close, finding comfort in each other's presence. Rory held her hand on Jess’s chest, feeling it move up and down. “Your breathing sounds better”, she commented quietly.

“It is. I managed not to get pneumonia this time”, Jess chuckled.

Rory smiled slightly. “I’m glad. My strong boy.”

Rory settled more comfortably beside Jess, her head resting on the pillow next to his. She turned slightly to face him, her fingers still entwined with his. She gave him a gentle smile, her eyes sparkling with a mixture of affection and concern.

“What was your fight about with your grandma?” Jess asked, breaking the silence.

“Oh, it was stupid. I was helping her organize this charity event she’s been planning for weeks, and everything was going fine. But then she made some offhand comment about my future, about how I need to start thinking more seriously about my career and who I’m surrounding myself with."

Jess tilted his head, sensing there was more to it. “And?”

Rory sighed again, frustration bubbling to the surface. “And she said I shouldn’t waste my time on things that aren’t going to 'benefit my future.' Like…” She hesitated before continuing, her voice softening. “Like spending so much time here, with you.”

Jess felt a pang in his chest but stayed quiet, letting her finish. Of course, it had been about him.

“She didn’t mean it that way, exactly,” Rory added quickly, “but it came out like that. And I just... I snapped. I told her I’m not going to let anyone decide what’s important to me or who I should care about.”

Jess looked down, his heart heavy. “So that’s why you didn’t come?”

Rory shook her head, guilt washing over her. “No, Jess, that’s not why. I was upset, and I took it out on everyone, including you. But I should’ve come anyway. I should’ve been here for you.”

Jess swallowed hard, the words stinging a little, but he understood. He knew the pressure Rory was under, how much her grandmother influenced her life. “I get it,” he said quietly. “She’s tough to deal with.”

Rory nodded. “She is, but that’s no excuse. I won’t let her, or anyone, get in the way of what really matters to me. And you matter to me, Jess.”

Jess offered her a small smile, his heart softening. “You matter to me too.” But knowing that he was actually the reason behind Rory’s fight with her grandma lingered in his mind. Rory had said over the phone that she hadn’t come over that day because of the fight. Meaning that the core reason for the fight between him and Rory and Luke was also him. Somehow, all the trouble seemed to be coming down on him. He thought that maybe her grandmother had been right. Being at the hospital obviously stressed Rory out and it wasn’t the best environment for her.

Jess hesitated, the knot in his chest tightening. "Maybe your grandma was right," he said softly, avoiding Rory's eyes. "Maybe you shouldn’t be spending so much time here. I mean... look at all the stress it's causing you."

Rory’s face immediately fell, her brow furrowing in confusion. “What? No, Jess, that’s not true. This has nothing to do with you.”

He shook his head, the insecurity gnawing at him. “But it does, Rory. You’re fighting with your grandma, then you’re fighting with Luke and me… and I’m the common denominator in all of it. I just don’t want to be the reason you’re falling apart.”

Rory’s eyes widened, her voice firm but tender. “Jess, listen to me. This isn’t your fault. You’re not some burden I’m carrying around. I want to be here with you.”

Jess’s gaze dropped to his hands, his fingers fidgeting with the edge of his blanket. “I don’t know. Maybe it would be easier if—”

“No,” Rory interrupted, her voice a little more forceful. “Don’t do that. Don’t push me away because you think you’re making my life harder. My life is harder because of everything going on, not because of you. You’re what matters to me, and that’s why I’m here.”

Jess swallowed, feeling the warmth of her words, but it didn’t stop the lingering doubt. “But if it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t be fighting with them.”

Rory sighed, her hand reaching out to rest gently on his. “Maybe I would, maybe I wouldn’t. But that’s not the point. What’s important is that I’m choosing to be here. Don’t let some dumb thing my grandma said make you doubt that.”

Jess finally met her eyes, searching for reassurance. “You’re sure?”

Rory squeezed his hand tighter. “I’m sure. You’re not pushing me away, Jess. I’m staying.”

Jess nodded slowly, the tension in his chest easing a little. But as he sat there, he couldn’t quite shake the feeling that, no matter how hard she tried to convince him, he was still the cause of all the trouble swirling around them. Even if she didn’t see it that way.

"So, how are you really feeling?" Rory asked, her tone light but sincere.

Jess sighed, glancing up at the ceiling for a moment before meeting her gaze again. "Better than I was a few days ago, but still pretty tired. They took me off the oxygen, which is a good sign, I guess."

Rory nodded, her thumb gently stroking the back of his hand. "That's definitely a good sign. You must be so relieved."

Jess managed a small smile. "Yeah, I am. It's just... frustrating. Being stuck here, feeling like I'm not making any progress."

Rory’s expression softened with empathy. "I can imagine. But you're stronger than you think, Jess. This is just another hurdle."

Jess chuckled lightly. "You always know how to make me feel better."

Rory grinned, her eyes twinkling. "That's my job. Besides, someone has to keep you from turning into a grumpy old man before your time."

Jess laughed, the sound more genuine than it had been in days. "Too late for that, I think."

Rory laughed too, the sound like music to Jess's ears. "Well, at least you're a charming grumpy old man."

They both settled into a comfortable silence, their hands still intertwined. Rory’s presence was like a soothing balm to Jess’s frazzled nerves, and for the first time in what felt like forever, he felt a sense of calm.

"So," Rory began, her tone turning playful, "what have you been doing to pass the time in here? Any new hobbies? Started a knitting club?"

Jess smirked. "Nah, no knitting for me. Mostly just staring at the ceiling and annoying the nurses. I did try to learn a few card tricks earlier, though."

Rory's eyes lit up. "Card tricks, huh? You'll have to show me sometime."

Jess’s smirk turned into a genuine smile. "Sure, but I warn you, I’m not very good. I’ve lost my skills."

Rory leaned in closer, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "I have a feeling you’ll get the hang of it. You’re pretty good with your hands."

Jess blushed slightly, the warmth of Rory's playful teasing making him feel more alive. "I’ll take that as a compliment."

They both laughed, the sound filling the room and chasing away the lingering shadows of worry. For the first time in days, Jess felt like himself again. With Rory by his side, he knew he could face whatever challenges lay ahead.

Jess was staring into Rory’s captivating eyes so intensely that he failed to notice the door to his room open and his uncle walk in. As Rory noticed, she kissed Jess’s cheek softly and walked herself out of the room, saying that he’d give the uncle-nephew duo a moment alone.

Jess shifted uncomfortably under Luke’s gaze. Again, he didn’t know what he should feel. He was glad Luke was here now, but he was also hurt by his actions, which also angered and saddened him. He waited for Luke to take the first step before he fully decided his approach.

Luke stood by the door still, not daring to move closer in case Jess was upset. He sighed before opening his mouth. “Jess, I’m sorry for what happened. I know it wasn’t fair that I took out my stress on you. I was just running on little sleep and it felt like everything was falling apart. But you did nothing wrong.”

Jess was eyeing his uncle and all he could see was genuine remorse. Jess didn’t know if Luke could be anything except genuine. The younger boy nodded as a sign of acceptance.

Luke shuffled closer to Jess awkwardly. “I’m glad you’re doing better.”

“Yeah, well,” Jess shrugged, trying to mask his emotions with a smirk. “I’m like a cockroach. You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

Luke smiled faintly at Jess’s attempt at humor, but the worry in his eyes didn’t fade. “You know, it’s okay to talk about how you’re really feeling, Jess.”

Jess rolled his eyes. “Oh, great. We’re having a heart-to-heart. Just what I needed.”

Luke sighed, frustration mingling with concern. “Jess, I’m serious. Bottling things up isn’t going to help.”

“Look, I get it,” Jess interrupted, a sharp edge to his voice. “You’re worried. Everyone’s worried. But I’m fine. Really. Just peachy.”

Luke frowned, clearly not convinced. “You don’t have to pretend with me, Jess. I’m here for you.”

Jess looked away, his sarcasm faltering for a moment. “Yeah, well, maybe I’m not great at the whole ‘sharing my feelings’ thing. Sorry to disappoint.”

Luke took a step closer, lowering his voice. “It’s not about disappointing anyone, Jess. It’s about getting through this together.”

Jess’s jaw tightened, and he stared at the ceiling. “Can we just drop it, Luke? I’m tired.”

Luke hesitated but then nodded slowly. “Okay, we can drop it. But I’m here if you need me. Don’t forget that.”

Jess didn’t respond, his eyes still fixed on the ceiling. The room felt heavy with unspoken words and unresolved tension. Luke sighed, knowing he couldn’t force Jess to open up.

Somehow, Jess felt it much easier to forgive Rory than he did with Luke. He loved Rory and deep down he knew she would never hurt him on purpose. And that should’ve been the case with Luke as well, but Jess found that it wasn’t. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it because he trusted Luke and knew that Luke cared about him. Maybe it was the fact that he didn’t have a great track record with parental figures or maybe it was his trauma from his childhood.

When Jess was younger, he used to see Luke as this larger-than-life character who would come and save him and his mom from whatever mess she had put them in. He’d give them money when they hadn’t eaten in days and when their electricity was cut off from unpaid bills. Luke would comfort Liz and bring her back from the depths of her own mind and he would sit with Jess and ensure him that everything would be fine now.

But as Jess grew older, he realized that Luke wasn’t always the hero Jess had made him out to be. Sure, he fixed up their messes time and time again, but he never tried to help them prevent getting into those messes. He just came over whenever the shit hit the fan. And it was never Jess’s problems that he tried to help with. He was never the trustworthy adult that Jess needed in his life until Jess moved to Stars Hollow. So, Jess had always had some doubts about the man. Luke had proved himself to be reliable now, but he just couldn’t quite shake off the feeling he had about the man. It would take some time before he could fully forgive him.

“I brought you something,” Luke said, trying to lighten the mood. He reached into his bag and pulled out a book. “Thought you might like to read this.”

Jess glanced at the book and then back at Luke, a flicker of appreciation in his eyes. “Thanks,” he muttered, taking the book. It was a paperback version of George Orwell’s 1984. Jess had read the book many times, but he didn’t currently have a copy of it. It was probably left behind in one of their many moves. He was glad to have a new copy though, to have more room for new notes, maybe some deeper ones than the fourteen-year-old Jess had written.

“I was thinking you could use something to do when you’re feeling better”, Luke said, trying to sound casual.

“Good thinking,” Jess replied, flipping through the pages.

Luke shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “You know, I’ve never really gotten the whole dystopian novel thing. What’s the appeal?”

Jess raised an eyebrow, a hint of a smile playing on his lips. “You mean besides the constant reminder that our society is on the brink of collapse?”

Luke chuckled. “Yeah, besides that.”

“It’s more than that,” Jess said, leaning back. “It’s about understanding human nature, power dynamics, and the lengths people will go to for control. Plus, it’s just good writing.”

Luke nodded thoughtfully. “Fair enough. I guess I’ll have to take your word for it.”

“You should read it sometime,” Jess suggested. “It might give you a new perspective.”

Luke smirked. “Yeah, and next you’ll be telling me to read ‘Brave New World’ and ‘Fahrenheit 451’”.

“Not a bad idea,” Jess said with a grin. “I’ve got a whole reading list for you.”

Luke shook his head, laughing. “I’ll stick to my cookbooks, thanks.”

Jess chuckled, the tension between them easing. It felt good to talk about something other than his illness, even if just for a moment.

Just then, the door opened, and Rory walked in. She glanced between Luke and Jess, a small smile on her face. “Hey, looks like I’m interrupting a book club meeting.”

Jess’s face lit up at the sight of her. “Hey, Rory. We were just discussing the merits of dystopian literature.”

Rory walked over and sat on the edge of the bed, her eyes twinkling. “Well, I have to agree with Jess. There’s something fascinating about exploring those dark, speculative worlds.”

Luke groaned playfully. “Great, now there are two of you.”

Rory laughed, and Jess couldn’t help but smile. The room felt lighter with her presence. “So, what did I miss?” Rory asked.

“Not much,” Jess replied. “Just Luke trying to convince me that cookbooks are the pinnacle of literary achievement.”

Rory raised an eyebrow. “Is that so?”

Luke shrugged, a sheepish grin on his face. “Hey, they’ve got pictures and everything.”

They all laughed, the sound filling the room and chasing away the lingering shadows. For the first time in days, Jess felt a genuine sense of warmth and connection. Maybe things were starting to look up after all.

Julie walked into the room with a clipboard in hand, her eyes lighting up when she saw Rory and Luke there with Jess. "Well, this is a nice surprise," she said warmly, walking over to Jess's bed. "How are we feeling today, Jess?"

Jess shrugged, but there was a faint smile on his lips. "Better. Breathing’s easier."

"That’s great to hear," Julie said, glancing at his monitors and jotting down notes. She gave him a reassuring smile before turning her attention to Rory and Luke. "It’s good to see some friendly faces here. Jess seems to be in good spirits."

Rory nodded. "We thought we’d come and keep him company. How’s he doing, Julie?"

Julie checked Jess’s pulse and adjusted his IV. "Physically, he’s making good progress. His vitals have stabilized, and his fever is down. It’s just important to keep his spirits up, too."

Luke, who had been standing by the window, turned back to face Julie. "We’re doing our best to help with that."

Julie smiled at him. "I can see that. It makes a big difference. Family and friends are crucial for recovery."

Jess rolled his eyes playfully. "Yeah, yeah, don’t get all mushy on me."

Julie laughed. "Don’t worry, Jess. I’ll keep it professional. But it’s true. You’ve got a great support system."

Rory leaned forward, placing a hand on Jess’s arm. "We’re not going anywhere, Jess."

Jess looked at her, his earlier frustration and sadness replaced by a grateful warmth. "Thanks, Rory. And you too, Luke."

Julie finished her check-up and stood back, her expression pleased. "Well, everything looks good here. Just keep doing what you’re doing, and we’ll have you back on your feet in no time."

"Thanks, Julie," Jess said sincerely.

Julie nodded, giving him a pat on the shoulder. "Anytime, Jess. Just keep resting and let us know if you need anything." She turned to Rory and Luke. "And thank you both for being here. It really does help."

"We’re happy to," Luke replied, giving Jess a reassuring look.

Julie waved as she left the room, leaving Jess with a renewed sense of hope and the comforting presence of his loved ones. As the door closed behind her, Jess felt a small but significant weight lift from his shoulders. Things were getting better, one step at a time.

Chapter Text

Jess slept like a baby that night. He no longer had the anxious feeling in his stomach, and he could breathe easier both literally and metaphorically. Things were starting to look up again. But obviously, the universe couldn’t let that happen. God forbid Jess Mariano catches a break.

It didn’t start that obvious. When Jess managed to stumble into the bathroom on his own for a morning piss, he caught a glimpse of his face in the mirror. He had a red rash forming on his cheek. Jess touched it, but it wasn’t sore or anything too unusual. He figured maybe he had just slept on it funny, and it was from the pillow. When he washed his hands, he noticed an odd redness in his palms, but he had an excuse for them as well. He probably just used too hot water to wash them.

Jess didn’t need any more trouble. He had enough on his plate already. And whatever this rash was, he was going to ignore its existence and it would disappear just like that.

He slowly made his way back to his bed and collapsed on it. He hated how tired the few feet walk made him. Back when he lived in New York, he would sometimes walk around for miles just because he felt like it (and because he didn’t want to go home). Now he could barely make it to the bathroom and even that made him out of breath.

He settled down and pulled out his MP3 player and earphones. He figured music would be a good distraction and his eyes were feeling too sore for reading anyway. He leaned back on his pillows and crossed his legs on the bed. The pajama pants he was wearing were about three sizes too big on him (despite him being in a children’s hospital?), and he had to fold the pant legs. He wasn’t exactly loving wearing the hospital clothes again, but Luke had forgotten to bring him his own clothes. And at least if he had a medical emergency, they wouldn’t have to destroy his favorite shirt in order to resuscitate him.

Jess laid his arm against his forehead as he listened to Master of Puppets and bopped his head to the rhythm slightly. His eyes darted across the room but the emptiness of it didn’t make him flinch this time. Jess found that on some days he loved being alone and on some days he could barely stand it. His therapist would find a reason from his childhood, and he’d probably be right.

Growing up, Jess never had a choice when he’d have company and when he’d be alone for days. He could beg Liz to stay, to not leave him but it would be like talking to the walls, she’d never listen. The solitude was forced on him and for the longest time, he had struggled to embrace it. He’d cry until the neighbors yelled at him to shut up through the walls and then he’d sit curled up in a ball, silently sobbing. But as he got older, Jess learned to love being alone. It meant that he could be away from his mother’s crazy antics and her boyfriends’ abusiveness. No one could hurt him when he was alone. But no one could love him either.

Jess must’ve dozed off because when he became aware of his surroundings again, Emily was in his room. She was eyeing his reddened cheek with concern.

“Hi Jess. Are you feeling alright?” she asked him as she grabbed his chart.

Jess nodded and rubbed his eyes tiredly. He pulled out his earphones that were now blasting a song Jess had never heard before.

“Is that a rash on your cheek? Is it itchy?” She leaned closer to take a closer look.

Jess faked a cough so he could cover his face with his hands, making sure his palms were covered from Emily’s watchful eye. “Uhh no, I guess I just slept on it funny”, Jess made up an excuse. It wasn’t anything bad. It would go away if he ignored it.

“You sure?”

“Yeah. It’s nothing.” Jess gave her a weak smile in an attempt to convince her.

Emily hesitated, her eyes searching his face for any sign of discomfort. “Alright, but if it gets worse or if you feel any other symptoms, you need to tell us, okay?”

Jess nodded, feeling a pang of guilt. He didn’t want to worry anyone more than necessary. As Emily left the room, he sighed and lay back down, trying to push the thoughts of his worsening condition out of his mind.

It didn’t take long for the rash to start itching. No matter how much Jess scratched it, he felt the itch deep in his bones and he couldn’t satisfy it. He noticed the rash had spread from his palms to his wrists, but he had no idea how his face looked like, and he had no strength to go check in the bathroom. He tried pouring a bit of water on the rash from a cup sitting on the bedside table but all that did was make his bed wet.

Soon with the itch came the stomach cramps. Jess doubled over in pain, clutching his abdomen. The pain was sharp and relentless, twisting his insides. He tried to breathe through it, but every inhale felt like knives slicing through him. Sweat was pooling on his forehead as he pressed his face against the bed. As much as he didn’t want to, Jess knew he could no longer deal with this on his own. He pressed the call button for the nurse, but the seconds felt like hours as he waited for help.

When Emily finally arrived, her eyes widened at the sight of him. "Jess, what’s happening?" she asked, rushing to his side.

Jess could barely speak through the pain. “Stomach… hurts.”

Emily caught sight of Jess’s worsened rash and paired with abdominal pain, she knew immediately what was up. “Okay, we need to get Dr. Parker. Just hang in there, Jess.”

Jess groaned and closed his eyes. He didn’t register Dr. Parker entering the room until he felt the man touch his arm. “Jess, how long have you had the rash?” he asked and looked into his eyes intensely.

“This morning”, Jess managed to say.

Dr. Parker nodded and spoke out some orders to Emily that Jess was way too tired and in pain to listen to. “You should’ve told us earlier, Jess”, he heard the older man scold him.

“It didn’t feel serious”, Jess muttered.

“Jess, what you have is a textbook case of Graft-Versus-Host disease. If we knew earlier, we could’ve prevented this situation.”

Jess was barely listening, the pain in his stomach making it hard to focus on anything else. Dr. Parker’s voice seemed to drift in and out, but he managed to catch some of what the doctor was saying.

“Graft-versus-host disease, or GVHD, happens when the donor cells see your body’s cells as foreign and attack them,” Dr. Parker explained, his tone gentle but firm. “It can affect various parts of the body, including the skin, liver, and digestive tract. That’s likely why you’re experiencing these stomach cramps and rashes.”

Jess groaned again, the pain intensifying. “Can you make it stop?”

“We’re going to do everything we can to manage your symptoms and treat the disease,” Dr. Parker assured him. He turned to Emily. “Let’s start him on steroids to suppress the immune response and get him something for the pain.”

Emily nodded and swiftly left the room to fetch the medications. Dr. Parker stayed by Jess’s side, offering words of comfort and explaining the next steps. “The steroids should help reduce the inflammation and the immune response. We’ll also give you painkillers to help manage the pain. It might take a bit of time, but we’ll get this under control.”

Jess felt a flicker of hope through the haze of pain. He nodded weakly, trusting Dr. Parker’s expertise.

Emily returned quickly, administering the medications swiftly into Jess’s IV. Jess felt a cool sensation as the painkillers entered his bloodstream, slowly dulling the sharp edges of his agony. The steroids followed, and though he knew it would take time for them to take full effect, he already felt a slight relief knowing they were working on his behalf.

As the medication began to take hold, Jess relaxed a little, the pain and itching subsiding to more manageable levels. Dr. Parker stayed with him, monitoring his progress. and ensuring he was as comfortable as possible.

“You’re doing great, Jess,” Dr. Parker said softly. “Just hang in there. We’ll get through this together.”

Jess nodded, his eyes heavy with exhaustion. “I’m sorry”, he whispered weakly.

Dr. Parker’s eyes filled with sympathy for the young man. “You don’t have to apologize Jess. I know this is all hard for you”, the man comforted him, gently patting Jess’s shoulder. Jess leaned into the touch. Dr. Parker noticed.

“I’ll call your uncle to inform him about the GVHD.”

“Tell him I’m fine. He doesn’t need to rush over immediately.”

“Of course. You get some rest now. We’ll keep monitoring you.”

Jess lay back on the bed, his body aching but his mind slightly eased by Dr. Parker's comforting words. He closed his eyes, trying to will himself to sleep, but his thoughts kept him awake. The rash still itched, the cramps persisted, but at least he could lay down without having to double over. He turned to lay on his stomach, thinking the pressure would help with the cramps. He moaned out in pain but quickly he found the position soothing, and it didn’t take long until he fell asleep.

A few hours later, Jess heard the door to his room creak open. He opened his eyes to see Luke, Rory, and Lorelai entering, their faces a mix of concern. Jess’s isolation rules had been let down a bit, now allowing for all three of them to visit him at once if they were all healthy. And that if anything cheered Jess up.

“Hey there, kid,” Luke said, his voice a rough whisper of concern. He stepped closer, his usually stoic face softening as he took in Jess’s condition. The rash was now covering most of his right cheek and running down to his neck. His hands were also covered by it, the rash reaching past his wrists. Despite the steroids, the nasty rash still persisted, but it was no longer itchy.

Jess mustered a weak smile. “Hey. You didn’t have to come so soon.”

Luke snorted softly. “You think I was gonna stay away after hearing what’s going on? Not a chance.”

Rory moved to Jess’s side, her eyes glistening with worry. “Of course we came. We’re here to support you”, she said and gently stroked his cheek. She ran her thumb over the rash softly. Jess leaned into her touch and she smiled at him.

“We brought you some clothes. And food from Luke’s. We all know how much you complain about the hospital stuff”, Lorelai chuckled and placed the bag on Jess’s feet on the bed.

Jess chuckled. “Thanks. I’ll need that.”

Luke and Lorelai settled on the left side of the bed while Rory sat on the edge on the other side. They sat in silence for a while.

“Dr. Parker said you tried to hide your symptoms”, Luke spoke out carefully.

“The man’s lying”, Jess said in a sarcastic tone.

Luke sighed. “Jess, it’s serious. You can’t just hide stuff. It’ll only make you sicker.

“Yeah yeah. I’ll tell someone the second my pinkie starts hurting or when I sneeze”, Jess said indifferently.

Luke sighed, shaking his head. "This isn’t a joke, Jess."

Jess rolled his eyes, trying to mask the guilt creeping in. “I get it, Luke. I really do.”

Rory, sensing the tension, placed a gentle hand on Jess’s arm. "We’re just worried about you," she said softly. "We don’t want anything to happen to you."

Lorelai chimed in, her voice warm and reassuring. "You’ve got to give us a chance to help you, Jess. We can’t do that if you don’t tell us what’s going on."

Jess sighed, his shoulders slumping. "I know. I just… I didn’t want to bother anyone."

Luke leaned forward, his expression earnest. "You’re not a bother, Jess. You’re family. We want to be here for you, but you’ve got to let us in."

Jess looked around at their concerned faces, feeling a pang of guilt for causing them to worry. "I’m sorry," he murmured, his voice barely audible.

Rory squeezed his hand gently. "It’s okay. Just promise us you’ll let us know next time something’s wrong." She moved a strand of hair from his forehead.

Jess nodded slowly, his defenses finally starting to crumble. "I promise."

The room fell silent again, but this time the silence was more comfortable, filled with understanding and unspoken support.

“Hey, I heard you’ve been practicing some card tricks. You should show us,” Lorelai spoke out excitedly, trying to lighten the mood and bring some joy to the room.

Jess, despite his fatigue, managed a small grin. “You really want to see some magic?” he asked, his voice still weak but his eyes twinkling with a hint of his old spark.

“Absolutely,” Rory chimed in, squeezing his hand. “We could all use a little magic right now.”

Jess nodded, carefully sitting up with their help. He reached for the deck of cards on the bedside table, shuffling them with practiced ease. His movements were slower than usual, but his focus was intense.

“Alright, pick a card, any card,” Jess said, fanning out the deck in front of Luke.

Luke played along, selecting a card and showing it to Lorelai and Rory before handing it back to Jess. Jess shuffled the deck again, then made a show of concentrating deeply. With a flick of his wrist, he revealed Luke’s card.

“Is this your card?” Jess asked with a flourish, holding up the Ace of Spades.

Lorelai and Rory clapped, their faces lighting up with genuine smiles. “That’s amazing, Jess!” Rory exclaimed, her eyes sparkling with admiration.

“Do another one!” Lorelai urged, leaning forward eagerly.

Jess couldn’t help but chuckle at their enthusiasm. He performed a few more tricks, each one more impressive than the last. He made cards disappear and reappear, guessed their chosen cards with uncanny accuracy, and even managed to make a card float for a brief moment.

As he finished his last trick, Jess looked up to see the smiles on their faces. The room was filled with laughter and light, a stark contrast to the gloom that had hung over them previously.

“You’re really good at this, you know,” Luke said, a proud smile on his face.

Jess shrugged, trying to play it cool but unable to hide his pleasure. “I had a lot of time to practice.”

“We should have a magic show once you’re out of here,” Rory suggested, her excitement contagious. “You could be the star performer.”

“Yeah, maybe I will,” Jess said, feeling a surge of hope and determination. “Once I’m out of here.”

Jess leaned back against the pillows, feeling more at peace than he had in a long time. He looked around at his family, although not by blood but that didn’t matter. For now, the pain and fear were overshadowed by the joy of their presence and the simple magic of being together.

Jess’s love for magic had started from a young age. He read the Harry Potter books when he was young like every other kid did. But he felt like he liked them a bit more than everyone else did, almost like it was his special interest. He used to pretend to be Harry himself and run around the apartment waving a spatula as a makeshift wand. He could get absorbed in the books for hours and once he finished reading, he continued playing the scenes over in his head. He’d imagine himself in Hogwarts, defying Voldemort and attending magic lessons with Ron, Hermione, and Harry. It was his escape from reality.

He begged and begged his mother to buy him a magic set from the toy store, but obviously, she always told him that they couldn’t afford it. But Jess was convinced that she was just bluffing and she’d get it for him for his 10^th birthday.

He indeed did get it for his birthday, but not from his mom. It was from Luke, but Jess didn’t know that since Luke had also gotten him another gift, letting Liz pretend that she bought him the magic set. Jess jumped up and down with pure joy as he unwrapped the gift. He hugged his mother tight but she only pat his back half-heartedly and told him to let go after a few seconds. But Jess didn’t care because he had the magic set. He ran off to his room to practice immediately and it kept him occupied for months. When he came home from school, he’d go practice the tricks and he’d do so until he was too tired to keep his eyes open.

And as he practiced, he started to improve. It didn’t take long until Jess could perform some simple card tricks and make coins disappear. He was always eager to show Liz his new skills, but Liz wasn’t quite that eager to watch. “Mom, please, I’ve practiced so hard”, Jess would beg and Liz would tell him to stop bothering her with his childish tricks. Sometimes when she was drunk and her boyfriend was over, they’d sit on the couch and let Jess show them his skills. And Jess would be so excited to show them. He didn’t realize that the adults were whispering to each other, mocking him, and laughing at him right in front of his face. Jess was just happy someone was paying attention to him if even just a minute and he thought his tricks were bringing a smile to his mother’s face. That’s all he ever wanted to do, to make his mom smile.

Jess was twelve when his enthusiasm for magic died. His two-year-old magic set was well-loved, bringing Jess a lot of joy and providing him with much-needed distractions. They had moved apartments only a few weeks ago to Liz’s new boyfriend’s place. Greg was a tall, brunette man with scars on his face. He always smoked a cigarette, no matter where he was, and he always had a bottle in his back pocket. Like many of Liz’s men, he also hated Jess. The boy was a reminder that Liz had been with other men and to Greg’s possessive mind, that was like showing a red cloth to a bull. He enjoyed tormenting Jess in any way he could. He’d pull Jess’s hair and tase him with a taser he’d stolen from a cop. Jess tried to stay out of his way as much as possible.

One afternoon, Jess was sitting in his room, practicing a new card trick he had just learned. He had finally perfected it, and a rare smile was spread across his face. The feeling of accomplishment was something he seldom experienced, and he cherished it.

Suddenly, the door to his room slammed open. Greg stood there, a sneer on his face, a cigarette hanging from his lips. The air instantly filled with the smell of smoke and cheap alcohol. Jess's heart sank, and he quickly tried to hide his magic set under his bed, but Greg was quicker.

“What you got there, boy?” Greg asked, his voice dripping with malice.

“Nothing,” Jess mumbled, looking down at the floor.

Greg strode across the room, yanked the magic set from under the bed, and began rifling through it. “This is what you waste your time on? Magic tricks?”

Jess felt a lump form in his throat. He knew better than to respond, but he couldn’t help but say, “It’s just a hobby. It helps me…”

“Helps you what?” Greg cut him off, his voice rising. “Helps you be a freak? This is the most useless crap I’ve ever seen.”

Without warning, Greg began to smash the magic set. He stomped on the box, breaking it into pieces, and tore the cards apart. Jess watched in horror as his beloved items were destroyed. The tricks he had spent hours perfecting were now just torn paper and broken plastic.

“Please, stop!” Jess begged, tears streaming down his face.

Greg just laughed, a cold, heartless sound. “You think this is bad? You’re lucky I don’t do worse.”

Jess felt a pain in his chest that was different from the physical pain Greg usually inflicted. This was a deeper hurt, a sorrow that came from watching something he loved being destroyed before his eyes. When Greg finally finished, he looked at Jess with disgust.

“You’re a waste of space. Remember that,” he spat before leaving the room.

Jess dropped to his knees, picking up the pieces of his magic set with trembling hands. He tried to piece them back together, but it was no use. The set was ruined, and with it, his love for magic was shattered. The one thing that had brought him joy, that had made him feel special, was gone.

From that day on, Jess buried his interest in magic deep inside. He learned to hide his passions and his pain, keeping his head down and trying to be invisible. The sparkle in his eyes dimmed, replaced by a hardened, cynical look. The world had shown him its cruel side, and he would never forget it.

It was only recently that Jess dared to start practicing some of the card tricks again. In the boredom of the small isolation room, Jess really had to use all his imagination to figure out ways how to entertain himself. He remembered how much fun he used to have with a simple deck of cards and he decided to give it a go since Rory had brought him a pack. The memories of Greg had surfaced but Jess pushed them aside from the way of the plenty of happy memories he had with magic. The positives outweighed the negatives. Plus Jess was pretty sure Greg was either in jail or dead, so he knew the man couldn’t hurt him anymore.

After the magic tricks, they found a movie that suited all of their tastes and started watching it on the small TV mounted on the wall. Rory climbed on the bed and cuddled up with Jess while the adults sat next to them, holding hands. The room was filled with a comfortable silence, the kind that only comes from being surrounded by those who truly care about you.

As the movie played, Jess felt himself relax more than he had in days. Rory's presence next to him was calming, her hand gently resting on his arm. Every now and then, she would glance up at him and smile, a look of pure love and reassurance in her eyes. Luke and Lorelai were engrossed in the film, their hands clasped together in a show of solidarity and support.

Jess felt his eyelids grow heavy, the combined effects of his illness and the comforting presence of his family lulling him into a state of peace. He fought to stay awake, not wanting to miss a single moment, but his body had other plans. Slowly, he felt himself drifting off, the soft murmurs of the movie and the gentle rise and fall of Rory's breathing beside him blending into a soothing lullaby.

Eventually, Jess fell into a deep sleep, his head resting lightly on Rory's shoulder. She turned to look at him, a tender expression crossing her face as she brushed a strand of hair away from his forehead. "He's asleep," she whispered, her voice filled with relief and affection.

Luke and Lorelai looked over, their faces softening as they took in the sight of Jess sleeping peacefully. "He needs it," Luke said quietly, squeezing Lorelai's hand a bit tighter. "He's been through so much."

Lorelai nodded. "We'll make sure he gets through this," she said firmly. "He's not alone."

Rory continued to stroke Jess's hair gently, her eyes filling with tears. "He's so strong," she murmured. "I just wish he didn't have to be."

They all sat there for a while, watching over Jess as he slept. The room was filled with a sense of love and solidarity, a silent promise that no matter what came next, they would face it together. Jess's breathing was steady and calm, the faintest hint of a smile on his lips as he slept, surrounded by the people who loved him most.

Chapter Text

Jess had been sick more than most kids. If you asked Liz, it was because Jess was weak and bratty and he wasn’t grateful enough. But the reality was that it was probably the environment Jess grew up in. His mom had drunk and smoked when she was pregnant with him. Then when he was born, they lived in moldy apartments where the temperature was never much higher than outside during the winter. Jess was also malnourished his entire childhood and he didn’t have warm enough clothes to withstand the cold winters of New York. But obviously, Liz always blamed Jess for getting sick.

As was apparent, Liz wasn’t the type of mother who sat by your bed and wiped your forehead with a washcloth when you were sick. She didn’t make Jess soup or even provide him with drinks and meds. In fact, there was no children’s medication or even a thermometer in their home. Jess was pretty much left to fend for himself, like normally. The only thing that would be different was that his mom and her boyfriends would mock him for being sick. That’s how he learned to hide his illnesses.

One particularly harsh winter, when Jess was around six, he caught a nasty cold that quickly turned into a fever. He lay on the old couch, his small body wracked with shivers as he tried to bundle up with the thin, threadbare blanket. His throat felt like it was on fire, and every breath he took hurt his chest. He was alone in the apartment; Liz and her boyfriend, Will, had gone out to a bar, leaving Jess to fend for himself.

Jess tried to distract himself by watching TV, but the images on the screen blurred together as his fever climbed higher. He felt dizzy and nauseous, but he knew better than to call for help. The last time he had, Liz had screamed at him for interrupting her, and Will had threatened to throw him out into the cold. So, Jess suffered in silence, hoping that maybe this time the sickness would pass quickly.

Hours later, the front door slammed open, and Liz and Will stumbled in, laughing loudly and reeking of alcohol. Jess instinctively curled up tighter on the couch, trying to make himself as small and invisible as possible.

Liz spotted him and staggered over, peering down at him with bleary eyes. "What are you still doing up?" she slurred, her words barely comprehensible.

Jess's voice was barely a whisper. "I'm sick, mommy."

Will came up behind Liz, sneering. "Oh, he's sick again? What a surprise," he said mockingly. "Maybe if you weren't such a little wimp, you wouldn't get sick all the time."

Liz laughed, a harsh, grating sound. "Yeah, maybe if you were tougher, like other kids, we wouldn't have to deal with this."

Jess's eyes filled with tears, but he quickly blinked them back. Crying would only make things worse. "I'm sorry," he mumbled.

"Sorry doesn't cut it, kid," Will said, his tone turning menacing. He grabbed the blanket and yanked it off Jess, exposing him to the cold air. "You think you deserve to be warm and cozy when we're out working to put food on the table?" That of course wasn’t the truth. They had been out drinking their money away instead of using it for something beneficial like food or medicine for the sick child.

Liz wobbled slightly, her expression turning from mocking to irritated. "You know what? Maybe you do need to toughen up," she said, her words slurring together. She pulled Jess off the couch and pushed him toward the front door. "Go outside and get some fresh air. Maybe that'll teach you to stop being such a burden."

Jess stumbled, his fever-weakened legs barely holding him up. "No, mommy, please," he begged, his voice cracking with fear.

But Liz and Will were relentless. They shoved him out into the freezing hallway, the door slamming shut behind him. Jess stood there, shivering violently in his thin pajamas, his body wracked with pain and exhaustion. He leaned against the wall, tears streaming down his face as he slid down onto the floor and brought his knees to his chest. It was so cold and soon his cries turned into rough coughs.

Minutes felt like hours as he sat there, the cold seeping into his bones. Eventually, the door creaked open, and Liz peered out, her expression indifferent. "Get back in here," she muttered, pulling him inside by his collar. "But don't think this means you're off the hook. You need to toughen up, Jess."

Jess stumbled back to the couch, his body weak and trembling. He curled up under the blanket, his mind a whirl of pain and confusion. He didn't understand why his mom was so cruel, why she didn't seem to care about him. All he knew was that he had to be strong, had to hide his pain and sickness if he wanted to survive.

In the haze of fever and exhaustion, he drifted off into a restless sleep, his dreams filled with images of warmth and safety that he knew he'd never find in this place. The last thing he heard before darkness claimed him was his mother's drunken laughter and Will's angry shouting, a harsh reminder of the reality he was trapped in.

As the night wore on, Jess's fever worsened, but no one noticed. No one cared. He was just a sick little boy in a world that had no time for sick little boys. And so he lay there, alone and forgotten, hoping that someday, things would be different.

So, it really shouldn’t be a big surprise that Jess had tried to hide his symptoms earlier. Growing up in an environment where showing weakness meant inviting more pain, Jess had learned to keep his suffering to himself. His childhood had been a relentless struggle to survive, to avoid attracting the ire of his mother and her boyfriends. It was a hard habit to break, even now, surrounded by people who genuinely cared about him.

As Jess lay in the hospital bed, he reflected on his past. The familiar sting of the rash and the gnawing pain in his stomach were nothing compared to the emotional wounds he carried. Yet, despite the physical agony, a part of him felt a strange sense of relief. For the first time in his life, he wasn’t entirely alone in his suffering. There were people here who wanted to help him, who wouldn’t mock or abuse him for being weak. But it had taken Jess a long time to realize that he didn’t need to hide his weakness from Luke and Rory. The traumatic events from his childhood were always there at the back of his head and they were always telling him not to show weakness or he’d be punished.

Rory came to visit him around midday. She kissed his cheek and sat by his bed, reading a book out loud for Jess to listen. Jess was propped up with pillows, looking pale but more alert than he had in days. Rory’s voice was soothing as she read aloud, the words filling the quiet space between them.

She paused for a moment, her eyes flicking up to Jess. “Are you sure you want me to keep reading this? I didn’t realize there was so much about... you know, childhood trauma and stuff. It’s quite heavy. We can pick something else.”

Jess shook his head, a faint smile on his lips. “It’s fine. Keep going.”

Rory hesitated but continued. “Daniel’s dad hit the boy when he was mad. But he also hit him when he was drunk and when he was frustrated and even when he was happy. Daniel was always scared around his father. The older man was unpredictable, and he even seemed to enjoy tormenting the little boy. Daniel’s mother knew of the abuse, but she never attempted to stop it. Better him than her, she had thought.”

Okay, maybe it wasn’t fine after all. “Stop for a second,” Jess said quietly, his voice strained. The book was hitting a bit too close to home. Jess contemplated his options. He wanted to tell Rory more about his childhood. He trusted her fully but he wasn’t sure she could take it. And Jess didn’t want her to see him any differently after learning those things about him.

Rory closed the book, looking at him with concern. “Jess, are you okay?”

He took a deep breath, struggling to find the words. “You know... I haven’t really talked about my childhood much. I mean, you know the basics, but there’s a lot I’ve never told you.”

Rory reached out, taking his hand in hers. “You don’t have to talk about it if you’re not ready. But I’m here to listen if you want to.”

Jess squeezed her hand, drawing strength from her presence. “I think... I need to talk about it. It’s just hard. Growing up, it was just my mom and me. She wasn’t the best parent, to put it lightly. She had these boyfriends, one after another, and most of them were... not good people.”

Rory nodded, her eyes full of empathy. “You don’t have to go into details if it’s too painful.”

Jess shook his head, determination in his eyes. “No, I need to say this. They used to hurt me, Rory. My mom’s boyfriends, they would get drunk and... and take out their anger on me. I was their punching bag. She’d blame me for everything. If something went wrong, it was my fault. If the water got shut off, it was my fault and if we got evicted because of her daily loud parties, that was my fault too. She’d also leave me alone for days on end. I was just a kid, but I had to fend for myself.”

Rory’s grip tightened on his hand, her heart breaking for him. “Jess…” She didn’t know what to say. There were no words.

“I used to hide,” Jess continued, his voice trembling. “In closets, under the bed, anywhere I could find. But they always found me. And my mom... she just let it happen. Sometimes, she even joined in.”

Tears welled up in Rory’s eyes, but she held them back, not wanting to upset him further.

“I couldn’t trust anyone. My mom was meant to be the trusty and responsible adult in my life, but she wasn’t. I didn’t have any. She never did anything to prove that she could be a mom. That’s why I call her Liz now. She was never a mom to me.”

Rory didn’t know what to say. Words didn’t feel like they had enough sympathy to express how wrong and unfair Jess had it growing up. She swallowed the lump from her throat. “Does Luke know?” she asked.

“He doesn’t know the extend of things. He knew Liz wasn’t responsible, but I don’t think he realized how bad she actually was. He always wanted to believe good things about her. And he doesn’t know that the guys were abusive.”

Rory clung to his hand and she wiped a tear that had escaped from her eye. “You didn’t deserve any of that. I hope you know that. You’re such an amazing and strong person and what those people did to you was terrible”, she said, looking into his eyes.

Jess nodded wordlessly. He looked down, his eyes dark with old pain. “It’s why I learned to keep everything inside. Why I never asked for help, even when I needed it. It was safer to be invisible.”

Rory leaned in closer, her voice gentle. “You don’t have to be invisible anymore, Jess. You’re safe now. You have people who care about you, who want to help you.”

He nodded, a single tear slipping down his cheek. “I know. It’s just... hard to believe sometimes. But having you here, it helps. It really does.”

Rory brushed the tear away with her thumb, her touch tender. “I’m always here for you, Jess. Always.”

Jess smiled at her words. “Thank you.”

Rory stroked his hair gently, feeling the texture in her fingertips. Jess’s hair had grown a lot since being stuck in the hospital and it was the longest Rory had seen it, reaching the bottom of his ears already. The slight curl pattern was gone and his hair was a mess from too rare showers and nights of tossing around. Stubble was growing on his jaw, making him look much older.

An idea popped into Rory’s head. “I know what we should do”, she cheered, breaking the somewhat somber atmosphere in the room. Jess cocked his eyebrow at her enthusiasm but smiled softly as he watched her excitement.

“What?”

“Spa day! I’ll treat you to some relaxing massages, a facial, a soothing face mask and a haircut. It’ll be fun.”

“Oh, you’re saying that I look like I need some beautification”, Jess chuckled, though he didn’t disagree.

“No, you always look great. But you deserve some pampering. And it’ll be something to do. I’ll just have to go and grab some supplies. You can shower in the meantime. You do need that”, she said playfully.

Jess laughed. That he did agree with. “Alright boss. Whatever you want.”

Rory pecked his cheek and got up from the chair. “I’ll be back soon. Love you.”

“I love you too.”

Jess didn’t struggle as much as before walking to the bathroom. It still did exhaust him but at least he wasn’t fully out of breath once he got there. He sat on a closed toilet lid for a moment before stripping and getting into the shower. The stool was still there, but Jess was determined to shower standing up. He felt like a grandpa when he had to use a freaking shower stool. He was eighteen years old for crying out loud. He shouldn’t need that.

The warm water felt amazing against his skin. He could just feel the sweat and grime washing off him. Jess closed his eyes, letting the water cascade over him, washing away not just the physical grime but also the weight of the past few days. He took a deep breath, feeling the warmth seep into his muscles, easing the tension he hadn't realized he was holding.

After a while, he finished showering and carefully dried off. He wrapped himself in a towel and slipped on a pair of pants.

When he stepped out of the bathroom, Rory was already back, laying out an assortment of spa supplies on the bedside table. She turned to him with a bright smile, her eyes twinkling with excitement.

"Feeling better?" she asked.

"Yeah, actually," Jess admitted, feeling a bit of his old self return. "Thanks for this, Rory. You didn’t have to go through all this trouble."

Rory shook her head. "It's no trouble at all. Now, let's get started. First up, a relaxing massage."

Jess lay on his stomach on the bed, feeling the cool sheets against his skin. Rory climbed on the bed with him, settling herself comfortably on his legs. The gentle weight of her presence was both comforting and reassuring. Jess closed his eyes, anticipation and curiosity mixing within him as he waited for her to begin.

Rory started with his shoulders, her fingers kneading the tense muscles with a practiced rhythm. Her touch was firm yet gentle, coaxing the tightness to release. Jess could feel the knots starting to loosen, a pleasant warmth spreading through his upper back.

"Let me know if I'm pressing too hard," Rory said softly, her voice a soothing balm in itself.

"You're perfect," Jess mumbled, his voice muffled by the pillow but filled with contentment.

Rory smiled at his response and continued her work, her hands moving in slow, deliberate circles over his shoulders and neck. She focused on each knot, applying just the right amount of pressure to ease the tension without causing discomfort. As she worked, Jess felt the stress and strain of the past few days melting away, replaced by a growing sense of relaxation.

Moving down to his back, Rory used her thumbs to trace the lines of his spine, gently but firmly pressing into the muscles on either side. She worked her way from the top of his back to the base, ensuring that no spot was left untouched. Jess let out a sigh of relief as she reached particularly tight areas, the release of tension almost euphoric.

Rory's hands traveled back up to his neck, her fingers deftly massaging the base of his skull. Jess felt a tingling sensation as she worked on the small, sensitive muscles there, her touch sending waves of relaxation through his entire body. He could feel the lingering headache he hadn't realized he had start to dissipate under her care.

"You have a lot of tension here," Rory observed, her tone gentle but concerned. "You need to take better care of yourself."

Jess chuckled softly, his voice laced with affection. "I think you're already doing a great job of that."

Rory smiled and leaned down to kiss the back of his neck, a tender gesture that made Jess's heart swell with gratitude. She continued her massage, her hands moving with a rhythm that was both soothing and methodical.

Her touch was like a balm to his soul, each stroke and knead a reminder that he was cared for and cherished. Rory's hands moved with an innate understanding of where he needed the most attention, her fingers finding and releasing knots with ease. She alternated between using her palms, fingers, and even her elbows to provide different levels of pressure and sensation.

Jess could feel himself sinking deeper into relaxation, his body and mind finally finding a reprieve from the constant stress and worry. The sensation of Rory's hands on his skin, combined with her warm presence, created a cocoon of safety and comfort that he hadn't felt in a long time.

After what felt like both an eternity and no time at all, Rory gradually slowed her movements, giving Jess's back a final, gentle rub. She leaned down and pressed a kiss to his shoulder, her lips soft and warm against his skin.

"How do you feel?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

Jess turned his head slightly to look at her, his eyes filled with gratitude and love. "Like I could stay here forever," he replied, a small smile playing on his lips.

Rory smiled back, her eyes sparkling with affection. "Good. You deserve to feel this way, Jess."

As she climbed off the bed, Jess rolled onto his back, still feeling the lingering warmth of her touch on his skin. He watched as she moved to gather the supplies for the next part of their impromptu spa day, his heart full of appreciation for the incredible girl who had brought so much light into his life.

“So, what does my client want to do next? The options are facial, haircut, or painting your nails.”

Jess thought about it for a while. “Let’s get the haircut out of the way.”

“Sure thing. Let’s go to the bathroom.” Rory led the way, holding Jess’s hand as they made their way to the still slightly wet bathroom.

Once they were inside, Rory guided Jess to sit on the edge of the bathtub, placing a towel around his shoulders to catch the hair clippings. Jess was shirtless, the steam from his shower still lingering in the room, giving his skin a slight sheen. Rory gathered the necessary tools: a pair of scissors, a comb, and a small hand mirror.

“Alright, Mr. Mariano, what kind of look are you going for today?” Rory teased, running her fingers through his damp hair.

Jess smirked, looking at her through the mirror. “Just a trim, nothing too fancy. I trust your judgment.”

“Good choice,” Rory said with a playful wink. She started by combing through his hair, detangling the knots and smoothing it out. Jess closed his eyes, enjoying the sensation of her gentle tugging on his scalp.

As she began to snip away, small talk filled the air. “So, how does it feel to be pampered like this?” Rory asked, her tone light.

“It’s nice. A bit weird, but nice,” Jess admitted. “I’m not used to this kind of attention.”

“Well, get used to it. You deserve to be taken care of,” Rory said firmly, her eyes focused on her work. “Besides, I kind of like playing hairstylist.”

Jess chuckled softly. “Yeah, you’re pretty good at it. Maybe you missed your calling.”

“Who knows? Maybe I’ll open up a little salon one day,” Rory replied with a grin. “But only if you promise to be my regular customer.”

“You’ve got a deal,” Jess said, his voice filled with affection.

Rory worked diligently, her fingers deftly maneuvering the scissors through his hair. As she trimmed and shaped, she occasionally stepped back to assess her progress, making sure everything was even and neat. Jess felt a growing sense of relaxation, the rhythmic snipping sound lulling him into a tranquil state.

“So, any plans for when you get out of here?” Rory asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

Jess shrugged slightly. “I haven’t thought that far ahead. Just taking it one day at a time, I guess.”

“Well, when you’re up for it, we should do something fun. Maybe a road trip or a picnic by the lake,” Rory suggested, her tone filled with hope.

“I’d like that,” Jess said, his smile widening. “A lot.”

As Rory finished the final touches, she handed Jess the hand mirror. “What do you think?”

Jess examined his reflection, turning his head from side to side. “Looks great. You did an amazing job, Rory.”

“Glad you approve. You look as handsome as ever,” she said, beaming with pride. She ran her fingers through his freshly cut hair one last time, making sure everything was perfect.

Jess stood up, the towel slipping off his shoulders as he turned to face Rory. “Thanks for this. For everything.”

Rory wrapped her arms around him, pulling him into a warm embrace. “Anytime, Jess. I’m here for you, always.”

Jess held her tightly, feeling a sense of contentment he hadn’t felt in a long time. He kissed her passionately and she answered similarly. “This is inappropriate. You’re my client”, she said in between kisses.

“We won’t let the other clients see.”

After a few moments, they broke the embrace. Rory gave Jess a playful nudge. “Alright, Mr. Handsome, let’s get back to your bed. We’ve got more pampering to do.”

Jess chuckled, running his fingers through his freshly cut hair. “Lead the way.”

They walked back to Jess’s room, hand in hand. Rory guided him to lie down on the bed, arranging pillows to prop him up comfortably. She then fetched a small bowl of warm water, some facial cleanser, and a face mask from her bag of supplies.

“Alright, time for the next step in our spa day,” Rory announced cheerfully. She dipped a soft cloth into the warm water and gently pressed it against Jess’s face, cleansing his skin. Jess closed his eyes, surrendering to her touch.

Rory worked methodically, massaging the cleanser into his skin with her fingertips. “You have great skin, you know that?”

Jess chuckled, his voice relaxed. “Thanks. I guess I have you to thank for that today.”

“Just doing my part,” Rory replied with a smile. She rinsed the cloth and wiped away the cleanser, then applied a soothing toner to his skin.

Jess opened his eyes, watching her with a soft smile. “You’re really good at this.”

“I’ve had practice,” Rory said with a wink. “Now, for the grand finale—the face mask.”

She opened a small jar of face mask and began applying it to Jess’s face with a gentle brush. The cool sensation of the mask was refreshing, and Jess felt his skin tingling pleasantly. Rory hummed a soft tune as she worked, her movements careful and precise.

Once the mask was evenly applied, Rory sat back and admired her handiwork. “There, all done. You just need to let it sit for a bit. I can do your nails while we wait. I only have one color option though, but I think you’ll like it.”

Rory pulled out a small, baby pink nail polish from the bag and Jess chuckled. “Are you trying to make a statement or just having a laugh at my expense?"

Rory giggled, shaking the bottle gently. "I think it’ll look cute on you. Plus, it’s all about trying new things. Trust me, you’ll rock it."

Jess sighed dramatically, still smirking. "Alright, Picasso, do your worst. Just remember, if I get any weird looks, I’m blaming you."

With that, Rory burst into laughter and began carefully applying the polish to Jess's nails. Jess watched her with a mix of amusement and affection, marveling at how her presence could make even the most mundane moments special. Rory did her own nails as well, wanting to match with Jess.

Just as Rory finished applying the last stroke of baby pink nail polish to Jess's fingers, Emily, the nurse, walked into the room. She stopped in her tracks, taking in the sight of Jess lying back with a bright green face mask and freshly painted nails.

Jess's face flushed with embarrassment. He looked at Emily, trying to muster a smirk. "Well, what do you think? Ready for the cover of GQ?"

Emily chuckled, a warm and understanding smile spreading across her face. "Absolutely, Jess. I’ve never seen anyone pull off a face mask and pink nails quite like you."

Rory grinned, giving Jess's hand a gentle squeeze. "See? Told you you’d rock it."

Jess sighed, feeling a mix of embarrassment and appreciation. "Yeah, yeah. Just remember this the next time you want to do a spa day," he said, his voice tinged with mock seriousness.

Emily moved closer, checking his vitals as she continued to smile. "You know, Jess, laughter and relaxation are just as important for recovery as the medication. You’re in good hands with Rory here."

Just as Emily was about to leave the room, she paused and turned back to Jess and Rory, a mischievous glint in her eye. "You know, Jess, I have some glitter nail polish back in the nurse's station. It’s all the rage these days. Really brings out the eyes."

Rory laughed, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "Ooh, Jess, what do you say? A little sparkle never hurt anyone."

Jess groaned playfully, rolling his eyes. "Alright, alright. I surrender. But if I start bedazzling my hospital gown, you only have yourselves to blame."

Emily chuckled, giving Jess a wink. "Don't worry, Jess. If that happens, I'll make sure to get a photo for the hospital newsletter. You’ll be a star."

Jess shook his head, unable to suppress a grin. "Great, just what I always wanted."

With that, Emily waved goodbye, leaving the room with a lighthearted atmosphere. Rory squeezed Jess's hand again, her smile radiating warmth and support. "See? Even Emily agrees you’re a natural."

Jess sighed, feeling a mixture of amusement and gratitude. "Yeah, yeah. Let's just get this face mask off before anyone else decides I need more fashion advice."

Rory gently wiped off the face mask with a damp cloth, revealing Jess’s refreshed skin. She ran her fingers through his hair, her touch tender and affectionate. “How do you feel?”

“Like a new man,” Jess said with a grin.

“Well, I’m glad. You deserve it.”

Jess lay back on the bed, his skin tingling from the pampering session. Rory settled next to him, nestling into his side. Her fingers traced gentle patterns across his bare chest, sending a shiver down his spine and raising goosebumps across his skin.

Rory giggled softly, noticing the reaction. "Look at that," she murmured, her voice warm and teasing. "I think I've found your secret spot."

Jess smirked, glancing at her with a playful glint in his eyes. "Is that so? Guess I'm just sensitive like that."

Rory's fingers continued their gentle dance, her touch light and comforting. "Well, it's a good thing. Means I can always get a reaction out of you," she said, her tone filled with affection.

Jess's smile softened, and he pulled Rory closer, their foreheads touching. "You always do," he whispered, his voice filled with sincerity.

“Who knew you’d be such a softie”, Rory giggled.

Jess chuckled softly, a hint of sarcasm in his tone as he replied, "Well, don't go spreading it around. I have a reputation to uphold."

Rory giggled again, her laughter light and infectious. "Your secret's safe with me," she promised, her fingers still tracing patterns on his chest. They stayed like that for a while, savoring the quiet intimacy of the moment. Jess felt a sense of peace wash over him.

"Thank you," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper.

Rory looked up, her eyes meeting his. "For what?"

Jess smiled, his eyes filled with gratitude. "For being here. For everything."

Rory's expression softened, and she leaned in to kiss his cheek. "Always," she whispered back. "I'll always be here, Jess."

Jess’s eyelids grew heavy as he lay there, wrapped in Rory’s embrace. The gentle rhythm of her fingers tracing along his chest was soothing, lulling him into a state of peaceful drowsiness.

"You know, you have this way of making everything better," Jess whispered, his voice barely audible as he fought to keep his eyes open.

Rory smiled and kissed his forehead. "That’s the plan," she said softly, continuing her gentle caresses.

Soon, Jess’s breathing slowed and deepened, signaling that he had finally drifted off to sleep. Rory watched him for a moment, her heart swelling with affection as she took in his relaxed features. She reached up to pet his hair, her fingers moving gently through the dark strands.

“You deserve all the peace in the world,” she whispered, her voice barely above a breath. She continued to pet his hair, her touch tender and loving, as Jess slept soundly beside her, finally finding a moment of respite from the chaos of his world.

Chapter Text

“Okay, Jess. Your bloodwork came back still negative for any signs of life in your bone marrow. But it’s only been two weeks since the transplant and that’s to be expected”, Dr. Parker explained.

Jess sighed, frustration building inside of him. He clenched his fists, the irritation seeping through his veins like a slow-burning fire.

“How much longer?” Jess asked, his voice laced with impatience.

Dr. Parker maintained his calm demeanor, understanding Jess’s frustration. “It varies for everyone, Jess. Some patients see results within a few weeks, while for others, it might take a couple of months. Your body needs time to adapt and for the new marrow to start producing healthy cells.”

Jess exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. “I just… I feel like I’m stuck. I want to start getting better. I hate this.”

“I understand, and it’s completely normal to feel this way,” Dr. Parker said sympathetically. “But your body needs time to heal. You’ve been through a lot, and it’s important to be patient with the process.”

Jess looked away, staring at the sterile walls of his hospital room. He hated feeling helpless, like his body was betraying him. The constant waiting, the not knowing—it was all wearing him down.

“Is there anything I can do to speed it up?” he asked, though he already knew the answer.

“Unfortunately, no,” Dr. Parker replied. “What you can do is take care of yourself as best as you can. Rest, eat well, and follow the treatment plan. Your body will take care of the rest.”

Jess nodded, though the frustration remained. He wanted to punch something, to release the pent-up anger inside of him. But all he could do was sit and wait, hoping that eventually, his body would start cooperating.

“I’ll check in on you later,” Dr. Parker said, offering a reassuring smile before leaving the room.

Jess lay back on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He felt a sense of hopelessness wash over him, but he tried to push it away. He had to stay strong, even if it felt impossible. He had to believe that eventually, things would get better. But for now, all he could do was wait.

He had been toying with an idea for a while now. He wanted to call Jimmy, his dad. His number was written down in Jess’s notebook and he had been eyeing it almost daily, contemplating whether or not he should do it. It was a massive risk. The man could want nothing to do with him, which in Jess’s mind was quite likely, considering that he had abandoned him when he was a newborn. It surely didn’t sound like someone who wanted to be in his life. But maybe Jimmy was changed. He was young back then and probably not ready to take care of someone else. And it wasn’t like Jess needed someone to raise him anymore. He just wanted to know. He wanted to know why he left. And maybe a part of him hoped that the man would want to get to know him now.

Jess had dialed the number into his cell phone. His finger lingered on the call button, still hesitating. What would he even say? “Hey, it’s your son.” The man would hang up immediately. He could pretend that he called a wrong number just to hear his voice. Or he could say it was about Liz and just make some shit up.

Jess had spent his entire life wondering why his father had left him. He often watched other kids with their dads at the park or at school events, feeling a pang of envy and sadness. He remembered one time in particular, when he was about six years old. It was a sunny Saturday, and Jess had gone to the park alone because his mother couldn’t care less what Jess did.

At the park, Jess had watched a father teaching his son how to ride a bike. The boy had wobbled and nearly fallen several times, but his father was always there to steady him, to encourage him. Jess had sat on a swing, swaying gently back and forth, and wondered why he couldn’t have that. Why he didn’t have someone to hold him steady when he wobbled, someone to cheer him on when he felt like giving up.

Liz never liked it when Jess brought up Jimmy. She got mad and brushed off his questions with a wave of her hand and a dismissive comment about Jimmy being a no-good loser who was better off out of their lives. But that hadn’t stopped Jess from wondering. It hadn’t stopped him from hoping that maybe, just maybe, there was a reason his father had left. A reason that had nothing to do with Jess being unworthy of love.

Now, sitting on his bed with his cell phone in his hand, Jess felt the weight of all those years of wondering and hoping pressing down on him. He took a deep breath and pressed the call button before he could change his mind.

The phone rang once, twice, three times. Jess's heart pounded in his chest, each ring echoing his growing anxiety. His finger hovered over the end call button, but before he could make a decision, the line clicked open on the fourth ring.

"Hello?" The voice on the other end was rough, older than Jess had imagined. It sounded tired, like the voice of someone who had seen too much of life and hadn’t liked most of it.

Jess froze, his mind going blank. His hand tightened around the phone as he struggled to find his voice. “Uh, hi. Is this Jimmy Mariano?”

There was a pause, long enough for Jess to hear the faint sound of a television in the background. “Yeah, who’s this?”

Jess swallowed hard, trying to keep his voice steady. “It’s Jess. Your son.”

The line went quiet, the silence on the other end of the line deafening. Jess could hear his own breathing, rapid and shallow, and the blood rushing in his ears. Finally, Jimmy spoke again, his tone skeptical and defensive.

“Stop fooling around. Who’s this really?”

“It’s really me. You and Liz used to live in New York, and I was born on April 5th, 1984. You left the day we got out of the hospital.”

“What do you want? To tell me you hate me? I get it, okay.”

Jess clenched his jaw, feeling the frustration and anger bubbling up. “I just want to know why.”

“Why what?” Jimmy’s voice was sharp, impatient. It was becoming quite clear to Jess that he didn’t get his intellect from Jimmy.

“Why did you leave me?”

Jimmy sighed heavily, and Jess could almost see him rubbing his temples in annoyance. “Look, Jess. I don’t really want to talk about this right now.”

“Right now?” Jess’s voice rose, incredulous. “I’ve wondered this my entire life, Jimmy. My whole life, I kept questioning why the man I shared my last name with decided to run out of my life the second he had an opportunity. And now that I finally have a chance to know, after eighteen years, you say you don’t want to talk about it.”

“Has it already been eighteen years?” Jimmy’s tone was more bewildered than anything, as if the passage of time had somehow escaped him. God damn the man was oblivious.

“Yes. I’m eighteen.”

There was a pause, then a soft, almost resigned question. “Are you doing alright?”

Jess laughed bitterly, the sound harsh and mirthless. “Yeah, just peachy. I have relapsed leukemia, catch up.”

The silence that followed was even heavier than before. When Jimmy finally spoke, his voice was quiet, almost defeated. “I’m sorry, Jess. I didn’t know.”

“Of course you didn’t,” Jess snapped. “You never bothered to find out.”

Jimmy’s tone turned pleading, desperate. “Jess, I was young and stupid. I made a lot of mistakes. But I’m not sure I can make it right.”

Jess felt a lump forming in his throat, and he fought to keep his voice steady. “I don’t need you to make it right. I just need to understand. Why did you leave?”

Jimmy’s sigh was heavy with regret. “I was scared. I didn’t think I could be a good father. I thought you’d be better off without me.”

Jess closed his eyes, letting the words sink in. It wasn’t the answer he had hoped for, but it was something. “Maybe you were right. I don’t know how my life would’ve been like if you stayed. But it was pretty damn shitty after you left.”

“I know,” Jimmy said softly. “I’m sorry, Jess. For everything.”

Jess took a deep breath, but his anger didn’t melt away. “You should’ve been more careful. I didn’t deserve to be brought up to those conditions.”

The line was silent for a moment, and when Jimmy spoke again, his voice was strained with guilt. “You’re right, Jess. You didn’t deserve any of it. I wish I could go back and change things.”

Jess clenched his fist, his knuckles turning white. “Wishing doesn’t change anything. Do you have any idea what it was like growing up with Liz? The boyfriends she brought home? I spent my childhood trying to survive, not being a kid.”

Jimmy’s breath hitched audibly. He couldn’t say anything to that.

 “I knew you didn’t care. I just want to know... did you ever think about me?”

Jimmy’s response was immediate, almost desperate. “Every day. I thought about you every single day. But I convinced myself you were better off without me, and I was too ashamed to come back.”

Jess felt a pang of sadness mixed with his anger.  He wasn’t sure whether the man was lying or not. Surely, he would’ve contacted Jess if he really thought of him every day.  Jess was starting to think the man was full of shit.

Jess rubbed his temple, feeling a headache coming on. “Look, I don’t know what I’m expecting from you. I just needed to say all this.”

“I understand,” Jimmy replied softly. “And I’m here now. If you ever need anything, I’m here.”

Jess laughed bitterly. “A bit late for that, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, it is,” Jimmy admitted. “But it’s all I can offer. I’m sorry, Jess. Truly.”

There was a long pause, the weight of their conversation hanging heavily in the air. Finally, Jess let out a slow breath. “Goodbye, Jimmy.”

“Bye, Jess”, Jimmy said, his voice filled with regret. “Take care of yourself, kid.”

Jess flinched at Jimmy calling him kid. That’s what Luke called him and that man had been more of a father to Jess than Jimmy ever had and ever will be. Jimmy didn’t deserve to call him that.

He felt drained, emotionally and physically. The conversation had opened old wounds, but it had also brought a strange sense of closure. He wasn’t sure if he could ever forgive Jimmy, but at least now he had some answers.

But it didn’t take away the years of hurt he’d felt. It didn’t take away the pain of not knowing and feeling unlovable. He wanted to hate Jimmy, to just yell that at him and hang up on him. He didn’t want to be understanding and forgiving. He just wanted to wallow.

Jess curled up on the bed, pulling his knees to his chest. His mind was running a million miles an hour. He wanted to scream and cry at the same time. Instead, he called Rory.

“Hey”, Rory’s voice came through the line almost immediately.

“Hey”, Jess answered, his voice quiet and strained.

“Is everything alright?” Rory could sense Jess’s distress.

“Can you come over?”

“Of course, I’ll be right there.”

Jess sighed as he put his phone away. He felt better just knowing that she was on the way. Jess decided to jot down some of his thoughts in his notebook.

I called Jimmy. I needed some answers, but I don’t feel better knowing the answers. I used to have hope that he left because he needed to go take care of a sick grandmother or because he worked as a firefighter and he needed to save a family from a burning house and he died being a hero. But today I learned that he left because he was scared. He’s just a coward. Like father like son, I suppose. It would’ve been better to just never know. But it’s weird to think about him again. I wonder what traits I got from him. Liz kept saying that I’m as stubborn as him and that I looked like him. But I don’t want to be like him. Fuck him honestly. Fuck everything. I wish I didn’t have to be anyone’s son.

Rory walked through the door half an hour after Jess called her. She had been helping Lorelai to organize the kitchen cupboards, but she dropped everything the second he asked her to come over. She could hear it in his voice he needed her.

She found Jess sitting on the armchair, looking outside silently. He had his knees pulled up to his chest and he was leaning his hands on his knees with his chin resting on his hands. The wires from his IVs were floating across the small room, connecting back to the IV pole by his bed. His back was facing the door, but Rory could see his face reflecting from the window. Her heart ached by how small Jess looked.

She walked towards him slowly. She could tell he was upset and as much as she liked that he wasn’t hiding his feelings anymore, she didn’t know how to approach him when he was sad. Rory decided to be as gentle as possible. She sat on the armrest of the chair and wrapped her arm around the boy’s thin shoulders. She didn’t say anything, but instead, she waited until Jess was ready to talk about it.

Jess relaxed under her touch a little bit. Silent understanding was radiating from Rory even when she didn’t know what had happened yet. They sat in silence for a while.

“I called my father today”, Jess finally spoke out.

Rory was taken aback. She hadn’t expected that. She turned to look at Jess, but he was still just looking outside. “I take it didn’t go too well.”

Jess sighed. “I don’t know. It wasn’t bad either. Just not what I expected.”

“What did you expect then?” she asked, her hand squeezing his shoulder slightly.

“That he left me because he had something important and heroic to do. But instead, he was just a loser coward, like Liz said.”

Rory frowned. She if anyone knew that father relationships could be hard. But she knew she had it better than Jess did. “I’m really sorry Jess.”

“Yeah well, I should’ve expected it. No wonder I’m such a loser. I have two losers for parents. It’s my destiny”, Jess said gingerly, burrowing his face in his knees.

“Hey, that’s not true Jess. Don’t you ever say that about yourself”, Rory pulled Jess’s face up, holding it gently between her hands. “You’re amazing and strong and like the furthest thing from a loser”, she comforted him.

“Yeah, because when you look up strong in the dictionary, the first thing that appears is a guy who’s skinny as a stick and emotionally as stable as a house of cards”, Jess said bitterly.

“But you are strong because of those things, don’t you get it? You’re strong because you’re still holding on, you’re fighting when most people would’ve given up a long time ago if they were in your situation.”

Jess finally turned to look at Rory, his eyes filled with a mixture of frustration and sadness. "Do you really think so?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

Rory nodded firmly, her eyes locked onto his. "I know so, Jess. You’ve been through so much, and yet here you are, still fighting, still trying. That takes an incredible amount of strength."

Jess leaned into Rory's touch, feeling a small bit of comfort in her words. "I just... I hate feeling this way. Like I’m always waiting for the other shoe to drop."

Rory continued to stroke his hair gently, her touch soothing. "I know it’s hard. But you don’t have to go through it alone. You have me, Luke, and even Lorelai. We’re all here for you."

Jess sighed, closing his eyes for a moment. "I guess I just expected too much from him. Maybe I thought he could somehow fix everything."

Rory’s heart ached for him. "Sometimes people can’t give us what we need, no matter how much we hope they can. But that doesn’t mean you’re not worthy of love and support."

Jess looked back out the window, his mind drifting back to his childhood. "I remember this one time in preschool, it was Father’s Day, and we had to make cards for our dads. I didn’t have anyone to give mine to, and the teacher made me do it anyway."

Rory’s expression softened. "That must have been really hard."

"It was," Jess admitted. "The other kids made fun of me. They laughed because I didn’t have a dad to give my card to. I felt so alone."

Rory’s grip on his shoulder tightened slightly. "I’m so sorry you went through that, Jess. Kids can be so cruel."

Jess nodded, a bitter smile tugging at his lips. "Yeah, they can. But I guess I got used to it. Learned to hide how I felt, because showing weakness just made things worse."

"You don’t have to hide anymore," Rory whispered. "Not from me."

Jess met her gaze, his eyes searching hers for a moment before he finally nodded. "Thanks, Rory. For being here. For listening."

"Always," Rory promised, leaning in to press a soft kiss to his forehead. "You’re not alone anymore, Jess."

Rory noticed the lingering sadness in Jess’s eyes and decided she needed to do something to lift his spirits. She glanced around the room and spotted the remote control. With a quick flick, she turned on the TV and flipped through the channels until she found a music channel playing a lively, upbeat song.

Jess looked at her quizzically as she turned up the volume. "What are you doing?" he asked, a hint of curiosity in his voice.

"Cheering you up," Rory declared with a smile. She walked over to Jess, gently taking his hands and helping him stand up from the chair. "Come on, let’s dance."

Jess raised an eyebrow, clearly skeptical. "Dance? Really, Rory?"

"Yes, really," she replied, her eyes sparkling with determination. "Trust me, it’ll be fun."

Jess sighed but couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at his lips as Rory led him to the middle of the room. She started moving to the music, holding his hands and swaying gently. Jess watched her for a moment before slowly starting to move with her.

At first, his movements were hesitant, but Rory’s infectious energy soon had him loosening up. She twirled him around, making him laugh despite himself. The upbeat rhythm of the music filled the room, and for a moment, all of Jess’s worries seemed to melt away.

Rory grinned as she saw the change in his expression. "See? You’re a natural."

Jess chuckled, shaking his head. "I don’t know about that, but this is... nice."

"That’s all that matters," Rory said, giving his hands a reassuring squeeze. "Just let go and have fun."

As the song continued, Jess found himself getting more into it. He matched Rory’s movements, their steps becoming more synchronized. The room was filled with the sound of their laughter and the beat of the music. Rory spun around, pulling Jess with her, and for the first time in a while, he felt genuinely happy. But in his enthusiasm, he accidentally tangled himself in the IV and monitor wires attached to him. He stumbled a bit, looking down with a sheepish grin. "Oops. Guess I got a little carried away."

Rory laughed softly, her eyes twinkling with amusement. "Hold on, let me help you."

She gently guided him to sit back on the edge of the bed. Carefully, she began untangling the wires, her fingers deftly working to free him from the mess. Rory’s hands moved with gentle precision as she began untangling Jess from the wires. Her fingers brushed against his skin, leaving a trail of warmth and comfort in their wake. She started with the IV line, carefully lifting it and maneuvering it around his arm, ensuring not to pull on it too hard.

"Hold still for a second," she murmured, her voice soft and soothing. Jess complied, watching her intently. She lifted his arm slightly, looping the IV line over his wrist and freeing it from the tangle.

"You really did get tangled up, didn’t you?" she teased, her tone light and playful.

Jess chuckled, watching her work. "Yeah, guess I’m not used to dancing with all these extra accessories."

Rory looked up at him, a mischievous glint in her eye. "Well, now you know. Dancing in a hospital room comes with its own set of challenges."

Next, she moved to the monitor wires. Rory leaned closer, her breath warm against his neck as she reached around him. She gently untwisted the wires that had wrapped around his chest. Her touch was tender, almost caressing, as she worked to free him.

"Alright, this one’s a bit tricky," she said, her tone light yet focused. Her fingers traced the path of the wire down his side, carefully lifting it and untangling it from his waistband. Jess felt a shiver run down his spine at the intimacy of the moment, her closeness both comforting and exhilarating.

She paused, looking up at him with a reassuring smile. "You’re doing great. Just a little more."

Jess nodded, his eyes never leaving her face. Rory’s hands moved to his back, her fingertips grazing his skin as she worked to free the last of the wires. She was methodical, her touch never harsh or hurried.

"There we go," she said, finally untangling the last wire. Rory gently placed it back in its proper position, her fingers lingering on his skin for a moment longer than necessary. She stood up, giving him a triumphant smile. "All set."

Jess moved his arms, testing the newly freed wires. "Thanks, Rory. You’re a lifesaver."

Rory sat back down beside him, her expression softening. "Anytime, Jess. You know I’m always here for you."

He reached out, taking her hand in his. "I know. And I appreciate it more than you’ll ever know."

They sat in comfortable silence for a moment, their hands still intertwined. The music channel continued playing softly in the background, filling the room with a soothing melody. Jess looked at Rory, his heart swelling with affection and gratitude.

"You really do make everything better," he said quietly.

Rory squeezed his hand, her smile warm and reassuring. "And you make everything worth it."

Jess turned to look at Rory. “Will you stay tonight?” His eyes were almost pleading.

Rory smiled at him softly. “Of course I will.”

Jess laid back down on the bed and Rory joined him. She could see the weariness in him. She sneaked her hand into his hair and massaged his scalp. “You okay?” she asked.

“Yeah. Just tired.”

“Sleep. I’ll be here.”

As the evening stretched on, the room was bathed in the soft glow of the bedside lamp. The rhythmic beeping of the machines provided a steady background, almost like a lullaby. Rory stayed by Jess’s side, her fingers gently tracing patterns on his skin, soothing him whenever he stirred.

At 7 pm, Jess was already deeply asleep, exhaustion from his illness weighing heavily on him. Rory watched him for a while, her heart aching with a mixture of love and worry. She could see the lines of pain etched on his face, even in sleep.

As the hours ticked by, Rory continued to watch over Jess. Occasionally, he would let out a pained sound or shift restlessly. Each time, Rory was there, her touch gentle and reassuring. She stroked his hair, her fingers running through the dark strands, and whispered soothing words to him.

"Shh, it’s okay, Jess. I’m right here," she would murmur, her voice soft and calming.

Eventually, Rory’s own exhaustion began to catch up with her. She yawned, trying to stifle it, but it was no use. Her eyes grew heavy, and she fought to stay awake. She didn’t want to leave Jess alone, even for a moment.

She shifted on the bed, carefully so as not to disturb the sleeping boy or any of the medical equipment attached to him. Once she was settled, she draped her arm across his chest and nestled close to him. She could feel the steady rise and fall of his breathing, a reassuring sign that he was still with her.

Rory continued to pet his hair, her fingers moving in slow, rhythmic strokes. She whispered to him, even though she knew he couldn’t hear her. "You’re so strong, Jess. You’re going to get through this. We’re going to get through this together."

As the night deepened, Rory’s eyes finally closed, and she drifted off to sleep. Her head rested on Jess’s shoulder, her body curled protectively around his. Even in sleep, she held onto him, her presence a constant source of comfort.

Chapter Text

As the first light of dawn filtered through the hospital room’s blinds, Rory began to stir. She felt a warmth radiating beside her and instinctively reached out to check on Jess. Her hand met his forehead, and she instantly knew something was wrong. He was burning up.

“Jess, you’re really warm,” Rory said, her voice filled with concern. She shifted to face him, placing a gentle hand on his cheek. “Do you want me to call a nurse?”

Jess’s eyes fluttered open, and he gave a slight nod. The fact that he wasn’t protesting or trying to brush it off sent a jolt of worry through Rory. Jess was never one to readily admit when he needed help.

She stood up and reached out to the call button and within moments, the door to their room opened, and Julie walked in.

“Good morning, Rory. Jess,” Julie greeted, her tone professional yet warm. She immediately noticed the concern on Rory’s face. “What’s going on?”

“He’s really hot,” Rory said urgently, gesturing towards Jess. “Can you check his fever?”

Julie nodded, her demeanor becoming more focused. She moved quickly to Jess’s side, pulling out a thermometer and taking his temperature. Jess lay still, his eyes half-closed as he tried to conserve his energy.

Julie glanced at the thermometer and frowned. “You’ve got a pretty high fever, Jess. I’m going to call Dr. Parker and have him come see you right away.”

Jess grimaced. “Great,” he muttered.

Rory sat back down on the edge of the bed, her hand finding Jess’s. It was always scary seeing Jess deteriorate. She just wished she could do something to help.

Julie left the room to call Dr. Parker, leaving Rory and Jess alone for a few moments. Rory leaned in closer, brushing a few strands of hair away from Jess’s forehead. “You’re going to be okay,” she whispered, more to herself than to him.

Jess gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

It wasn’t long before Dr. Parker entered the room, his expression serious but calm. He approached the bed, giving Jess a reassuring nod. “Morning, Jess. I hear you’re running a bit of a fever.”

“Just a bit,” Jess replied weakly, attempting a small smile.

Dr. Parker took out his stethoscope and began his examination, listening to Jess’s breathing and checking his vital signs. “We’ll need to run some tests to determine the cause of the fever. It could be an infection, which is not uncommon after a transplant, but we need to be sure.”

Rory watched anxiously, her heart racing as she saw the concern in Dr. Parker’s eyes. “Is he going to be okay?” she asked, her voice trembling.

Dr. Parker met her gaze with a reassuring look. “We’ll do everything we can to get this under control. Jess is strong, and he’s in good hands. We just need to identify what’s causing the fever and treat it accordingly.”

Jess squeezed Rory’s hand again, his eyes silently thanking her for being there. Rory nodded, trying to stay strong for him. “Alright, let’s get this over with,” Jess said, his voice determined despite his obvious discomfort.

Dr. Parker smiled. “That’s the spirit, Jess. We’ll take good care of you.”

The medical team moved efficiently around Jess, drawing his blood with practiced ease. Rory held his hand the entire time, offering what little comfort she could. Jess winced slightly as the needle pierced his skin, but he remained stoic, his focus on Rory's reassuring presence.

Once the blood samples were taken, Julie administered some fever-reducing medication. “This should help bring your temperature down,” she said kindly, offering Jess a small smile. “It might make you a bit drowsy, so just rest as much as you can.”

Jess nodded. As the team finished up and began to leave the room, he turned to Rory, his eyes heavy with fatigue but filled with a plea. “Can you stay with me, Rory? I don’t want to be alone right now.”

Rory’s heart ached at the vulnerability in his voice. She squeezed his hand and smiled softly. “Of course, Jess. I’m not going anywhere.”

She settled back into the chair beside his bed, never letting go of his hand. Rory watched him for a moment, her heart full of worry and affection. She knew how hard it was for Jess to ask for help, to admit that he needed someone. The fact that he had asked her to stay meant the world to her.

“I hate being sick”, Jess muttered.

Rory smiled sadly. “I know.” She held his hand tightly.

Jess shifted on the bed, trying to get more comfortable. The fever burning in him was making him hot and cold at the same time. “Liz always hated when I got sick as a kid”, Jess said with a quiet voice.

Rory’s eyes turned soft, like she already knew that Jess would tell her something terrible from his childhood. There wasn’t much good to tell.“Why?” she asked gently.

Jess sighed, looking down at his hands. “She’d get so mad. Said it was my fault, that I was weak and pathetic. She never took care of me. I was just a burden to her. She’d push me out the door into the freezing hallway, to toughen me out.”

Rory squeezed his hand tighter, her heart aching for him. “That’s awful, Jess. You didn’t deserve that.”

Jess shrugged, trying to downplay it. “It’s just how it was. She had her own problems. But it made me hate being sick even more. Made me feel like it was something to be ashamed of.”

Rory shook her head, her voice firm. “You’re not a burden, and there’s nothing to be ashamed of. Everyone gets sick, and it’s not your fault. You deserve to be taken care of, Jess. You deserve to be loved.”

Jess’s eyes softened, a hint of vulnerability showing through. “Thanks, Rory. It’s just hard to shake off those old feelings, you know?”

“I know,” she said gently, leaning in closer to him. “But you’re not alone anymore. You have me, and you have Luke, Lorelai, and so many people who care about you. We’re here for you, no matter what.”

Jess nodded, feeling a lump in his throat. “I know. And I’m grateful for that. It’s just... sometimes it’s hard to believe that I deserve it.”

“You do,” Rory said, her voice filled with conviction. “You deserve all the love and care in the world, Jess. And I’m going to make sure you know that every single day.”

Jess smiled, a small but genuine smile. “You’re pretty amazing, you know that?”

Rory grinned back at him. “I try.

As Jess drifted into a feverish sleep, Rory stayed vigilant, her thumb gently stroking the back of his hand. Time seemed to slow down as she sat there, watching over him. She thought about the conversations they had shared, the moments of vulnerability and strength. She marveled at his resilience, at how he had endured so much and still fought to keep going.

Jess kept tossing on the bed, his expression pained. Every once in a while, a groan would escape his lips. His brow was furrowed, sweat glistening on his forehead and upper lip, making his dark hair stick to his skin. Rory gently wiped the sweat away with a damp cloth, her touch tender and careful. His face, usually so composed, was now a mixture of discomfort and restlessness, his mouth occasionally murmuring incoherent words.

His breathing was uneven, sometimes hitching in his chest as if he were struggling to find comfort. The heat radiating from his body was palpable, making the room feel warmer. Rory could see the rise and fall of his chest, each breath labored and shallow. She adjusted the blankets, trying to find a balance between keeping him warm enough and not exacerbating the fever.

His hands twitched now and then, fingers curling into loose fists before relaxing again. Rory could see the tension in his muscles, the way his shoulders remained hunched even in sleep. She continued to stroke his hair, murmuring soothing words to him, hoping to ease his discomfort.

“Shhh, Jess. It’s okay. I’m right here,” she whispered, feeling the boy’s forehead and grimacing when she still felt the heat radiating from him.

Jess turned his head slightly toward her voice, his features softening just a fraction. Rory took that as a good sign, continuing to talk to him quietly. She knew that even in sleep, he might find some comfort in knowing she was there.

She leaned in closer, her hand now resting on his chest, feeling the rapid heartbeat beneath her palm. His skin was hot to the touch, and she could sense the fever still burning within him. She wished she could take away his pain, but all she could do was be there for him, offering her presence and support.

Hours passed, and Jess’s fever began to subside, though he remained deeply asleep. Rory never left his side, her own eyes growing heavy with exhaustion. She leaned her head against the bed, still holding his hand, and eventually drifted off to sleep herself.

When Jess awoke, the room was quiet and dim. He felt the comforting weight of Rory’s hand in his and turned his head to see her sleeping beside him, her face peaceful and calm. A wave of gratitude washed over him. He squeezed her hand gently, not wanting to wake her but needing to feel her presence.

Rory stirred slightly, blinking awake. She smiled groggily at Jess, her hand tightening around his. “Hey, how are you feeling?” she asked softly.

“Better, I think,” Jess replied, his voice raspy but steady. “Thanks for staying with me.”

“Always,” Rory whispered, leaning in to press a soft kiss to his forehead. “I’m here for as long as you need me.”

Rory stood up and stretched her muscles for a while. It was 3 pm and the sun was shining into the room through the blinds. It was a beautiful day outside and she was slightly bummed that she couldn’t be out there enjoying it. But she wanted to be there for Jess, and she was determined to come up with something nice to do.

“Hey, we should have a movie marathon or something”, she suggested.

“We should?”

“Yeah. You pick. I can ask mom if she would bring snacks to us”, Rory smiled.

After ten minutes, Jess and Rory lay comfortably on the bed, the first Harry Potter movie queued up on the small TV mounted on the wall. Jess still felt weak, but his fever was down and fortunately laying in bed and watching movies didn’t require too much effort.

Rory pulled out her phone and sent a quick text to her mom. Hey Mom, Jess and I are going to watch some Harry Potter movies. Can you bring us some snacks? She hit send and smiled at Jess, who was propped up on some pillows, looking slightly more animated than he had been earlier.

A few minutes later, her phone buzzed with a reply. Of course, sweetie! I’ll be there soon with the best snacks Stars Hollow has to offer.

Rory chuckled and showed the message to Jess. “Mom’s on her way with snacks. Get ready for some serious pampering.”

Jess grinned. “Sounds good. I could get used to all this pampering.”

“Good,” Rory replied, settling back against the pillows. “You deserve it.”

They started the first movie, the familiar theme music filling the room and bringing a sense of nostalgia and comfort. Jess seemed to relax more with each passing minute, getting lost in the magical world on the screen. Jess related to Harry, at least in the tragic upbringing part. He wished he could be a hero like Harry as well.

About thirty minutes into the movie, there was a gentle knock on the door. Rory paused the movie and got up to open it, revealing Lorelai standing there with a huge bag of snacks and a wide smile.

“Snack delivery!” she announced, stepping inside.

“Hey, Lorelai,” Jess greeted her, sitting up a bit more. “Thanks for bringing the goodies.”

“Anything for my favorite patient,” Lorelai said, placing the bag on the small table beside the bed. “I brought popcorn, chocolate frogs, Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans, and some healthier stuff too, like fruit and granola bars. Being healthy is all the rage these days I hear.” She regretted her words immediately as they left her mouth. Jess was far from being healthy but the slip seemed to pass them by without registering it too much.

Rory hugged her mom tightly. “You’re the best, Mom.”

“I know,” Lorelai said with a mock haughty expression, then turned to Jess with a warm smile. “How are you holding up, kiddo?”

“Better, thanks,” Jess replied. “The fever’s down and Rory is keeping me sane.”

Lorelai nodded, her eyes softening with sympathy. “Well, I’m glad to hear that. And now, let’s make this movie marathon as epic as possible.”

Rory started organizing the snacks, handing Jess a bowl of popcorn and keeping some chocolate frogs for herself. Lorelai made herself comfortable in the chair beside the bed, joining them for a while as they resumed the movie.

After the second movie finished, Lorelai had to leave, but she made sure they had everything they needed. “Call me if you need anything, okay?” she said, giving Jess’s shoulder a gentle squeeze before hugging Rory tightly.

“Thanks, Lorelai,” Jess said sincerely. “I appreciate it.”

“Anytime, Jess. Take care,” she replied, and with a final wave, she left the room.

Rory snuggled back into the bed with Jess, who felt a warm, contented feeling spread through him. They resumed the movie, munching on snacks and enjoying the simple pleasure of being together.

The sound of a soft knock on the door drew both their attention. Dr. Parker entered the room, his expression serious yet compassionate. Jess tensed slightly, sensing that the news wouldn't be good.

"Evening, Jess. Rory," Dr. Parker greeted, his voice calm and measured. He held a clipboard in one hand, the other stuffed into his coat pocket.

"Evening, Doc," Jess replied, his voice raspy.

Rory straightened up, her hand still on Jess’s chest. "Dr. Parker, what's going on?" she asked, concern evident in her tone.

Dr. Parker took a deep breath before speaking. "Jess, your latest bloodwork came back, and there are some concerning findings. It appears your fever is due to an infection. Your immune system is compromised, likely due to the transplant and ongoing treatment. This infection is serious, and we'll need to address it immediately."

Jess felt a wave of frustration wash over him. “Awesome”, he muttered, trying to mask his fear with sarcasm.

Rory squeezed his hand, her eyes filled with worry. "What does this mean, Dr. Parker? What do we need to do?"

"We're going to start you on a strong course of antibiotics, Jess. We’ll also need to run more tests to pinpoint the exact cause of the infection.”

Jess’s frustration boiled over as he processed Dr. Parker’s words. He could feel the weight of his illness pressing down on him, suffocating any hope he had of a swift recovery.

“We’ll need to be thorough as your bone marrow has still not started producing new cells, and this will make it very difficult for you to fight off infections,” Dr. Parker continued.

Jess clenched his fists, his nails digging into his palms. "I’m so sick of this," he muttered, his voice tinged with anger and desperation. "I just want to start feeling better. Every time I think I’m making progress, something like this happens."

Rory squeezed his hand, her eyes filled with empathy. "I know, Jess. It’s not fair. But you’re strong, and you’ve made it this far. You can get through this too."

Jess looked at her, his eyes reflecting a mix of fear and frustration. "I’m so tired, Rory. Tired of feeling sick, tired of being stuck in this bed, tired of all of it."

Rory leaned closer, her voice gentle yet firm. "I know you’re tired. And it’s okay to feel that way. But you’ve got so many people who care about you and who are here to support you. We’ll take it one day at a time, and we’ll get through this."

Jess nodded, trying to draw strength from her words. "I just… I need a break. I need something to go right for once."

Rory stroked his hair soothingly. "You will get better, Jess. It might not seem like it now, but there’s a light at the end of this tunnel. We just have to keep moving towards it, even if it’s slow."

Dr. Parker chimed in, his tone compassionate. "Jess, it’s normal to feel this way. Fighting cancer is one of the hardest things anyone can go through. But you’ve shown incredible resilience. The antibiotics will help with the infection, and we’ll keep monitoring you closely. We’ll do everything we can to support you through this."

Jess took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. "Okay. Let’s get this over with."

Dr. Parker nodded. "I’ll have the nurses come in with the antibiotics. Hang in there, Jess. You’re not alone in this fight."

As Dr. Parker left the room, Rory shifted closer to Jess, wrapping her arms around him in a comforting embrace. Jess leaned into her, allowing himself to draw comfort from her presence.

As the door opened again, Julie entered with a tray of supplies. She gave Jess a warm smile, her presence immediately comforting.

"Hey there, honey," she greeted softly, her eyes full of compassion. "We’re going to get you started on these antibiotics. They should help with the infection."

Jess tried to return her smile but felt too exhausted to manage more than a small nod.

"You’ve been so strong, Jess," she said, her tone soothing as she prepared the IV. "This is just another bump in the road, but we’re going to get you through it."

Jess winced slightly as she inserted the needle, but Julie’s reassuring touch and kind words helped ease his discomfort. "I’m just… so tired of all this," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.

"I know, sweetheart," Julie said, her eyes meeting his with genuine empathy. "It’s okay to feel that way. You’re going through something incredibly tough, but you’re not alone. We’re all here to help you."

Rory, still sitting beside Jess, squeezed his hand gently. "Julie’s right. You have so many people who care about you, Jess."

Julie finished setting up the IV and started Jess on the antibiotics. “There you go, honey. The antibiotics are in, and we’ll keep a close eye on you. You’re doing great."

Jess closed his eyes, feeling a mixture of relief and lingering frustration. "Thanks, Julie," he murmured, grateful for the nurse’s kindness.

"You’re welcome, Jess," Julie replied, giving his shoulder a comforting pat. "Rest now, and let the medicine do its work. If you need anything, just press the call button, okay?"

Jess nodded weakly. "Okay."

Julie turned to Rory, giving her a supportive smile. "You’re doing an amazing job too, Rory. Keep being there for him."

Rory returned the smile, feeling a bit of the weight lift from her shoulders. "Thank you, Julie. We will."

As Julie left the room, the soft hum of the IV machine filled the silence. Jess leaned back against his pillow, feeling the warmth of Rory’s hand in his. Despite the exhaustion and the uncertainty of what lay ahead, he felt a flicker of hope. With Rory by his side and the support of people like Julie, he knew he could keep fighting, one day at a time.

Rory could see the weariness etched into Jess's features. His eyes were closed, but his brow furrowed slightly, a clear sign of his frustration and fear. She shifted closer to him, her heart aching to see him in such a state.

"Jess," she whispered, her voice gentle and soothing. He opened his eyes and looked at her, the usual spark in them dulled by exhaustion and worry. "Hey, come here."

She carefully pulled him into a hug, wrapping her arms around him and holding him close. Jess melted into her embrace, his head resting against her shoulder. Rory could feel the tension in his body, the way he trembled slightly as he let out a shaky breath.

"It's okay to be upset," Rory murmured, running her fingers through his hair in a comforting gesture. "You've been through so much, and it's not fair. But I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere."

Jess clung to her, finding solace in her warmth and steady heartbeat. "I'm just so tired, Rory," he admitted, his voice muffled against her shoulder. "I thought I could handle this, but it's just... too much."

"I know," Rory said softly, her own heart breaking for him. "But you're not alone in this. You don’t have to carry this burden by yourself."

Jess sighed, the weight of his emotions pressing down on him. "I hate feeling this way. Weak and helpless."

"You're not weak, Jess," Rory said firmly, pulling back slightly to look him in the eyes. "You’re one of the strongest people I know. And it's okay to feel overwhelmed. It doesn't make you any less strong."

He looked at her, searching for reassurance in her gaze. "You really believe that?"

"I do," she said, her eyes filled with sincerity. "And I believe in you. You're going to get through this, one step at a time. And I’ll be with you every step of the way."

Jess managed a small, grateful smile. "Thank you, Rory. I don’t know what I’d do without you."

"You'll never have to find out," she promised, giving him another gentle squeeze. "Now, how about we try to focus on something positive? We have like six Harry Potter movies still ahead of us. Let’s just take it one moment at a time."

Jess nodded, feeling a bit of the heaviness lift from his shoulders. "Okay. One moment at a time."

Rory kissed his forehead, her touch lingering as she tried to convey all the love and support she felt for him. "That's right. And right now, this moment is about us, together."

As they settled back into their spots, Rory kept her hand on his, a steady presence to remind him that he wasn't alone.

Jess settled back into the bed, his body sinking into the mattress. He let out a deep sigh, his eyes heavy with fatigue. Rory noticed and gently squeezed his hand.

"You look exhausted, Jess," she said softly. "Maybe we can save the movies for another time. How about I read to you instead?"

Jess didn’t protest. "Okay.”

Rory reached over to the small bookshelf beside his bed, picking out a book she knew he liked. She smiled as she settled back down next to him, opening the book to the first page.

"Alright, let's see," she began, her voice gentle and soothing as she started to read. Jess closed his eyes, listening to the familiar cadence of her voice. Each word seemed to wrap around him like a comforting blanket, easing some of the tension in his body.

As Rory read, she glanced over at Jess occasionally. She could see the way his breathing gradually became slower, more even. His features, once tight with worry and frustration, began to relax.

She continued to read, her voice a constant, calming presence in the room. Jess's hand remained in hers, their fingers intertwined. Rory's thumb gently stroked the back of his hand, a small, reassuring gesture that she was there, right by his side.

After a while, she noticed that Jess's breathing had deepened, a sign that he had finally drifted off to sleep. Rory closed the book quietly, setting it aside. She carefully adjusted the blankets around him, making sure he was comfortable.

Leaning over, she pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead. "Sleep well, Jess," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "I'm here."

Rory settled back into her chair, her eyes never leaving Jess's peaceful face. She continued to hold his hand, her presence a silent promise that she would stay with him, through the good moments and the bad, for as long as he needed her. And as Jess slept, Rory remained by his side, ready to offer comfort and support whenever he woke.

Chapter Text

As the fever reducer wore off, Jess’s fever spiked again. He remained asleep, but Rory noticed how his discomfort grew by the way he started moving around more and moaning and whimpering in his sleep. It worried Rory more than she wanted to let on and she pressed the call button to alert a nurse.

Julie walked in only a few minutes later and her expression softened as she saw the worry etched on the young girl’s face.

“He’s uncomfortable. I don’t know what to do.”

Julie placed her hand on Jess’s forehead and the heat of it made her grimace. “Poor thing”, she said more to herself than to Rory. She took Jess’s temperature, and it was a whopping 40.6 (105.08F) degrees.

“I’ll administer some more fever reducer for him”, she said and connected a syringe to Jess’s port on his chest. She gently pressed down on the syringe until all of the liquid had entered Jess’s bloodstream. “I’m afraid this is how it’ll be until his body is strong enough to start producing cells again. It’s nearly impossible for him to fight off the infection before that”, Julie explained.

Rory looked even more worried. “So, he’ll be really sick until then?”

“Unfortunately, that might be the case. But we’re all hopeful that the transplant will start working soon. Jess has shown incredible resilience and I’m positive that he’ll be just fine”, Julie comforted Rory.

“I just don’t like seeing him suffer”, Rory said quietly.

“Of course not. It’s very difficult watching your loved one go through something so tough. And I want you to know that we are here for you as much as we are here for Jess.” Julie had her hand on Rory’s shoulder reassuringly.

Rory nodded with a small smile. “Thanks Julie.”

“Now you get some rest too. You can’t be there for Jess if you aren’t there for yourself first.”

Julie exited the room after making sure that Jess had a fresh IV bag delivering liquids into his infection-ridden body. Rory sat on the armchair but turned it to face Jess so she could see if he woke up or needed help.

It was nearing midnight, but Rory couldn’t sleep just yet. She took out her cell phone and called her mom, hoping that she was still awake.

“Hey, sweetie. How’s it going at the hospital?” Lorelai’s slightly tired voice came on the line.

“I don’t know mom. Jess caught an infection and their saying he can’t fight it off before his body starts producing cells on its own again. He has a high fever.”

“Oh no, that doesn’t sound good”, Lorelai’s voice was empathetic.

“No, it’s not. And he’s really tired again and he looks so ill.”

“Luke and I will come there tomorrow. I’m sorry you’re there all alone honey.”

“I’ll be fine mom. I’m just worried about him.”

“I know sweetie. But Jess is a trooper, he’ll pull through.”

“Yeah, but it’s just scary mom. He’s so vulnerable now, not just physically but emotionally too. He’s told me about his childhood and its awful mom. I can’t believe he was treated that way. It’s so unfair”, Rory explained, trying to keep her voice steady.

“What did he tell you?”

“He said that his stepfathers would beat him, and his mom would let them. He said she left him alone for days when he was just a little kid and no matter what bad things happened, it was always Jess's fault. She never showed her love for him, mom.”

Lorelai didn’t know what to say. Luke had told her that Liz wasn’t the most reliable mom, but she had never known the extend of things and now she was thinking maybe Luke didn’t know either. “Rory, that’s just awful”, she said, her voice breaking a little.

“I know. But you can’t tell Luke. Jess wouldn’t trust me if he found out I told you and you told Luke.”

“Hun, don’t you think Luke should know about this?”

“Jess has to be the one to tell him. Plus, it wouldn’t change anything. The damage is already done”, Rory reasoned.

“But those men could still be charged. Jess could get justice.

“Mom. Do not tell Luke. Seriously. Jess can tell him when he’s ready.”

“Okay okay fine. Tell Jess I said hi when he wakes up. Oh and tell him he’s one hell of a fighter.”

“I will”, Rory smiled a little. “Good night mom.”

“Good night kiddo. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Rory tried to get comfortable on the armchair. Sleeping upright was never easy but the beeping of the monitors made it even harder. Fortunately for her, Jess started to trash again, and she quickly jumped up from the chair to rush to his side.

“No, please don’t”, Jess whimpered in his sleep. He turned his head from side to side aggressively.

“Jess, hey it’s alright. No one is hurting you.” Rory grabbed his hand, but Jess tried to yank it away from her.

“No, I’m sorry Tom. I’m sorry, please don’t”, Jess cried, his voice filled with desperation.

Rory didn’t know what to do. She tightened her grip on his hand, leaning in closer to his ear. "Jess, wake up. It's Rory. You're safe, I promise."

His movements gradually slowed, his eyes fluttering open. He looked around the room, disoriented and still caught in the remnants of his nightmare. His breathing was heavy and sweat glistened on his forehead.

"Rory?" he mumbled, his voice weak.

"Yeah, it's me," Rory said softly, brushing his hair back from his face. "You're safe. It was just a bad dream."

Jess took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. "Sorry," he muttered, his voice barely audible.

"You don't have to apologize," Rory reassured him. She sat on the edge of the bed, still holding his hand. "You kept saying 'Tom.' Who is he?"

Jess's face tightened at the mention of the name. He looked away, his gaze fixed on the ceiling. "Tom was... the worst of Liz's boyfriends. He was abusive. Really bad."

Rory's heart ached for him. She squeezed his hand gently. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Jess hesitated, then nodded slightly. "Tom... he was a real piece of work. He used to beat me for no reason, just because he could. He'd get drunk and take out all his anger on me. I was just a kid, Rory. I didn't understand why he hated me so much."

Rory felt tears welling up in her eyes, but she blinked them back. "I'm so sorry, Jess. You didn't deserve any of that."

Jess sighed, his eyes closing for a moment. "I know. But it was my reality. Liz didn't do anything to stop him. She just let it happen. I learned to hide, to stay out of his way as much as possible. But it was never enough."

Rory leaned in closer, wrapping her arms around him in a gentle hug. "You're so strong, Jess. You've been through so much, and you're still here, fighting. I'm proud of you."

Jess rested his head on her shoulder, his body relaxing in her embrace. "Thanks, Rory," he whispered.

They stayed like that for a while, holding each other. The room was quiet except for the soft beeping of the monitors and the steady rhythm of their breathing. Rory continued to stroke Jess's hair, offering him the comfort and support he so desperately needed.

Jess assured Rory that he was fine. He made room on the bed so that Rory wouldn’t have to sleep on the uncomfortable chair. She climbed in and spooned him from behind, her arm draped protectively over his waist. He felt Rory’s soft breathing evening out on his neck and he knew she had fallen asleep. But sleep didn’t come easy for Jess. He kept repeating the nightmare in his mind. Though he wasn’t sure it could even be called a nightmare. He remembered the day like it was yesterday.

Jess was nine years old, and life was already a constant state of survival. The small apartment they lived in was dark and cluttered with empty bottles and the lingering smell of cigarette smoke. Liz's latest boyfriend, Tom, was sprawled on the couch, a beer in hand, the television blaring in the background. His presence filled the room with an oppressive air that made Jess’s skin crawl.

Jess was in the corner, quietly reading a tattered comic book, trying to stay invisible. Liz was in the kitchen, clattering dishes together as she half-heartedly tried to clean up. She had a weary look on her face, one that Jess had grown accustomed to seeing.

“Liz!” Tom’s voice boomed from the couch. “Get me another beer!”

Liz flinched but didn’t move fast enough for Tom’s liking. He got up, his face twisted with anger, and stomped toward her. Jess’s heart raced as he saw the look in Tom’s eyes. He knew what was coming next.

“Didn’t you hear me?” Tom grabbed Liz’s arm roughly, yanking her away from the sink. She tried to pull back, but he was too strong.

“Tom, please,” Liz pleaded, her voice shaking.

Jess felt a surge of fear and anger. He couldn’t just sit there and watch. Summoning all his courage, he stood up and stepped between Tom and his mom. “Leave her alone, Tom.”

Tom turned his attention to Jess, his eyes narrowing. “What did you say, you little brat?”

“Leave her alone!” Jess repeated, his voice stronger this time, but his body trembling.

Tom let go of Liz and turned fully toward Jess. He sneered, an ugly, twisted smile. “You think you’re tough, huh? Trying to play the hero?”

Before Jess could react, Tom’s hand shot out, striking him across the face. The force of the blow sent Jess sprawling to the floor. His cheek stung, and tears welled up in his eyes, but he fought them back. He wouldn’t give Tom the satisfaction.

Liz cried out, “Tom, stop it! He’s just a kid!”

“Shut up!” Tom roared, ignoring her as he grabbed Jess by the shirt, yanking him to his feet. “You want to protect her? Fine, let’s see how tough you really are.”

Jess tried to fight back, but Tom was too strong. He felt the man’s fists pummeling him, each blow more painful than the last. He curled up, trying to shield himself, but it was no use. Tom’s rage was unrelenting.

“Tom, please!” Liz begged, tears streaming down her face. She tried to pull Tom away, but he shoved her back hard, sending her crashing into the counter.

Jess saw his mom’s pained expression and felt a new wave of anger and helplessness. He couldn’t protect her. He couldn’t even protect himself. The beating seemed to go on forever until finally, Tom grew tired and threw Jess to the ground.

“Pathetic,” Tom spat, looking down at Jess’s battered form. “Stay out of my way, or next time it’ll be worse.”

Jess lay there, bruised and aching, as Tom stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door behind him. Liz crawled over to him, her face a mask of guilt and sorrow.

“Jess, I’m so sorry,” she whispered, her voice breaking. “I’m so sorry.”

Jess looked up at her, his vision blurred by tears. He wanted to tell her it was okay, that he was fine, but the words wouldn’t come. All he could do was nod weakly as she gathered him into her arms, holding him close.

It was the first and last time Liz had cleaned up Jess’s wounds, probably because they were all so visible. She wrapped a band-aid around Jess’s head to hide the large cut on his forehead and she gave him a few bags of ice for his bruises. Jess was still crying as she cleaned him up but he also felt so happy that Liz was taking care of him. He thought this would be a turning point for them. That surely Liz wouldn’t let that man inside their home anymore after he brutally beat her nine-year-old son. How wrong was he again. Liz dated the man for a record of two years. She grew tired of defending Jess and she just let the man do whatever he liked to her only son. She didn’t care.

Jess remembered the flicker of hope he had felt that night, a hope that was soon extinguished as Tom continued to be a presence in their lives. Every time Jess saw him, he felt a mixture of fear and betrayal. Liz's brief act of maternal care had given him a false sense of security, and the repeated disappointments that followed were a harsh reminder of his reality.

The next day at school, Jess’s teacher noticed the band-aid and bruises, but when she asked, he lied, saying he had fallen off his bike. The lie came easily; it was what he had learned to do. He couldn't bear the thought of anyone knowing the truth, of anyone pitying him.

Jess’s whole body felt sore as he was struggling to fall asleep. He was shivering despite having a thick blanket on him and a human heater called Rory cuddled to his backside. Jess appreciated her presence, but the fever made everything feel surreal and distant. His mind drifted back to the endless nights of his childhood when he had shivered alone, wishing for someone to hold him and tell him it would be okay. Now, Rory was here, and he was grateful for that. He just wished little Jess would’ve had someone like Rory in his life too.

Jess closed his eyes, trying to focus on her touch. It was hard to push past the fog of fever and pain, but he clung to her presence like a lifeline. Her steady breathing and the gentle rhythm of her heartbeat were comforting, grounding him in the present. With Rory’s reassuring presence, he drifted off to restless sleep.

Luke and Lorelai walked quietly into the hospital room, hoping not to disturb Jess and Rory. The sight that greeted them made them pause in the doorway, their hearts aching.

Jess and Rory were still asleep, cuddled into each other, their faces peaceful despite the ordeal they were going through. Rory’s arm was draped protectively over Jess, and Jess had a faint smile on his lips, the most relaxed he had looked in days.

Lorelai reached for Luke’s hand, squeezing it tightly as they watched the young couple sleep There was so much love and tenderness in the scene before them that it was almost overwhelming.

Luke smiled softly and kissed Lorelai’s cheek. “Our babies”, Lorelai whispered as she side-hugged Luke.

“Jess would kill me if he knew you called him my baby”, Luke chuckled warmly. Lorelai laughed and held Luke’s arm gently.

Rory was the first to stir, her eyes fluttering open to the soft morning light streaming through the window. She smiled sleepily when she saw Luke and Lorelai standing nearby.

"Morning," she mumbled, stretching slightly.

Lorelai moved to sit on the edge of the bed, wrapping her arms around Rory in a warm hug. "Morning, kiddo. How are you holding up?"

Rory leaned into her mother's embrace, feeling a sense of comfort wash over her. "I'm okay. Just worried about Jess."

Lorelai pulled back, looking into her daughter's eyes with a mixture of pride and concern. "You're doing an amazing job, Rory. He's lucky to have you."

Rory glanced over at Jess, who was still sound asleep, his face flushed with fever. "I just want him to get better."

Luke stepped forward, placing a reassuring hand on Rory's shoulder. "He will. He's strong.” Luke felt Jess’s forehead with his hand. “Kid’s burning with fever”, he said quietly but trying not to sound as worried as he felt.

“They said he can’t fight off the infection before the transplant starts working. The medicine lowers his fever for some hours but when it wears off, it comes right back up”, Rory explained, keeping her gaze locked on the boy they all were so worried about.

A little while later, Jess began to stir, his brow furrowing as he slowly woke up. He groaned softly, his eyes opening to see the concerned faces around him. "Hey," he croaked, his voice weak. He tried to sit up, but he was too weak. Rory reached for the bed controller and lifted the head of the bed. Jess gave her a grateful nod.

"Hey, Jess," Rory said softly, reaching out to smooth his crazy bed hair. The haircut she had given Jess just a few days ago looked like it was long gone. "How are you feeling?"

Jess swallowed, his throat dry and sore. "Like crap." His eyes hurt and he was achy all over. He had thought he was getting better, that the worst was over already. That’s why he was so frustrated to be in this situation.

Luke moved closer, his eyes filled with worry. “Do you need something? Water, tea, I can run to the store to get you anything you want”, Luke offered. Jess shook his head weakly.

Lorelai leaned in, her voice gentle but firm. "We'll do whatever it takes to help you, Jess. You're not alone in this."

Rory adjusted the blanket around Jess, making sure he was as comfortable as possible. She wasn’t sure it was the best idea for Jess to be under a heavy comforter when he had such a high fever, but she knew he wouldn’t be happy if someone tried to take it from him. She could see him shivering under the covers even now.

“So, what have you two been up to the past few days? Done a lot of adventuring?” Lorelai asked, trying to lighten up the atmosphere in the room.

“Yeah, heaps. Went around town and on a shopping spree. Then we ran into a local jogging club and decided to join them spontaneously. We were still holding all the bags too”, Jess said sarcastically.

Lorelai and Luke chuckled. At least Jess had some energy to be his own sarcastic self. “Oh, shopping and jogging. I do that too, but usually I’m running away from Rory because she tries to stop me from buying ‘stupid junk’ as she says. But tell me what’s stupid about a frog alarm clock that sticks out its tongue when the alarm goes off. Or how about a pink cowboy hat with kitty ears.”

“Sound like perfectly necessary purchases to me”, Jess said as a matter of factly.

“Exactly. Your boyfriend here really gets me, Rory”, Lorelai said with a smile as she looked at Rory. The girl rolled her eyes playfully.

Luke glanced down and suddenly noticed the pink nail polish on Jess's fingers. A grin spread across his face as he looked back up at Jess.

"Hey Jess, nice manicure. Didn't know pink was your color," Luke teased, raising an eyebrow.

Jess's cheeks turned a shade of red that almost matched the polish. "Yeah, well... Rory thought it would cheer me up."

Lorelai jumped in with a playful tone, "And she was right! It looks fabulous. Very fashion-forward."

Rory giggled, squeezing Jess's hand. "I think it suits him perfectly. What do you think, Mom?"

Lorelai nodded emphatically. "Absolutely. It's the new trend. All the cool guys are doing it."

Jess rolled his eyes but couldn't help the small smile that tugged at his lips. Rory showed her own nails next to Jess’s. “And we match too.”

“Aww, Luke they match. That’s so cute”, Lorelai said with an overly sweet voice.

Rory laughed, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "You know, they say real men wear pink."

Luke chuckled, shaking his head. "Alright, alright. As long as you're happy, Jess. Just don't expect me to start painting my nails anytime soon."

Lorelai grabbed Luke’s hand and observed his nails. “You know, these could use some work. Quick, let’s tie him down and paint his nails. Jess, you get the feet, Rory can get the hands”, Lorelai said quickly and tried to drag Luke towards the bed. But Luke was too big for her to move. Instead, Luke grabbed Lorelai’s arms and manhandled her so that he could lift her on his shoulder. He jokingly carried her around the room for a bit before putting her back down.

“Okay, okay, point proven”, she laughed as she was standing on her own two feet again.

Rory and Jess were laughing at the ordeal on the bed. “That was the funniest thing you’ve ever done Luke. I should start doing that to mom when she won’t stop talking”, Rory giggled, holding Jess’s shoulder lightly.

“You wouldn’t be able to lift me up you silly girl.”

“Oh I think I would. I’m way stronger than you are.”

“Nu uh, I’m stronger”, Lorelai said and flexed her arms to show her biceps.

“I’m the one who always has to carry the vacuum upstairs because you complain that it’s too heavy for you”, Rory said tilting her head.

Lorelai cracked her knuckles playfully. “Maybe we should wrestle to settle this once and for all. And if one of us gets hurt, the help is near.”

Luke stepped between the two Gilmores. “Okay, no one is wrestling in here. You two are crazy.”

“Aww, Luke you’re no fun”, Lorelai pouted.

Jess found the whole ordeal more amusing than the time Luke locked them out of the apartment and he had to climb in through an open window on the second floor. He felt a bit more relaxed, forgetting for a moment the shitty situation he was in.

His joy was short-lived as soon, Dr. Parker walked into the room, clipboard in hand. He glanced around at the gathered family, noting the concern etched on their faces. Clearing his throat, he began to speak.

"Good day, everyone. I wanted to give you an update on Jess's condition." He paused, making sure he had their full attention. "Jess, your bloodwork came back and it shows some concerning things. Specifically, your C-reactive protein, or CRP, levels are quite high. This is an indicator of inflammation or infection in the body."

Jess's face fell, and Rory squeezed his hand tighter. Luke and Lorelai leaned in, listening intently.

Dr. Parker continued, "The primary issue right now is that your bone marrow has not yet started producing cells on its own. This is a critical step for your recovery, as these new cells are necessary to build a healthy immune system. Without them, your body is struggling to fight off infections."

He looked around the room, making sure everyone understood. "The high CRP levels suggest that your body is responding to an infection. This is why you're experiencing the fever and other symptoms. Until your bone marrow transplant starts working and producing cells, you're going to be susceptible to infections like this."

Rory's eyes were filled with worry. "So, what can we do? How can we help him?"

Dr. Parker nodded, appreciating her concern. "We're going to continue the course of strong antibiotics to help manage the infection. We’ll also be running more tests to pinpoint the exact cause and ensure we're targeting it effectively. The key thing now is to manage the symptoms and support Jess’s body as much as possible until the transplant takes effect."

Lorelai chimed in, her voice steady but laced with worry. "Is there any way to speed up the process? To get his bone marrow to start working sooner?"

Dr. Parker shook his head gently. "Unfortunately, it's a waiting game. Every patient's body reacts differently. We can only support Jess and monitor him closely. Keeping his spirits up and ensuring he gets plenty of rest are crucial."

Jess sighed, feeling a mix of frustration and exhaustion. "I just want to feel better already."

Dr. Parker gave him a sympathetic look. "I know, Jess. It's tough, but you're strong. Keep hanging in there. We'll do everything we can to help you through this."

With that, Dr. Parker left the room, leaving the family to absorb the information. It was stuff they already knew but it felt more real coming from the doctor. Rory held his hand, seeing the way Jess was clenching his jaw. The weight of the situation settled heavily in the room, an unspoken understanding passing between them.

As the reality of his condition sank in deeper, exhaustion started to overtake Jess again. He tossed on the bed, trying to find a comfortable position. He settled on his stomach, pushing his head between a pillow and the crook of his arm. Rory was rubbing comforting circles on his back.

Jess mumbled something into his pillow, but Rory didn’t catch it.

“What, sweetie?” she asked so casually, not realizing that her mom and Luke were still there. She blushed slightly as she realized she called Jess by a pet name in front of them.

Jess lifted his head a bit. “Can you go under my shirt? It feels nicer that way.”

Rory smiled and she leaned over to kiss the back of Jess’s head. Guess she didn’t feel shy anymore. “Of course.”

She pulled down his blanket a bit and sneaked her hand under Jess’s shirt. She felt goosebumps on his skin as she continued drawing circles of varying sizes on his back. She heard Jess murmuring a quiet thanks as she continued.

Jess's tense muscles began to relax under Rory's gentle touch. Her hand moved in soothing patterns, tracing invisible shapes that brought him a semblance of peace amidst the discomfort.

Lorelai and Luke exchanged a knowing glance. Seeing the tender interaction between the two teenagers was both heartwarming and heart-wrenching. Lorelai cleared her throat softly, drawing Rory's attention.

"We're going to step out for a bit," Lorelai said gently. "Give you two some privacy."

Rory nodded, her eyes conveying gratitude. "Thanks, mom. Luke."

"We'll be back later to check on you," Luke added, his voice gruff with emotion. He gave Jess a nod, though he knew the boy was likely too tired to respond.

As they left, the room grew quieter, the soft hum of the hospital equipment the only background noise. Rory focused entirely on Jess, her touch unwavering, her love evident in every gentle caress.

Jess mumbled something again, this time clearer. "Stay with me?"

"I'm not going anywhere," Rory promised, her voice barely above a whisper. She shifted slightly, lying down next to him on the narrow bed.

Eventually, the rhythmic circles and the warmth of Rory's body lulled Jess into a fitful sleep. His breathing evened out, and the tension slowly melted from his frame. Rory stayed awake, watching over him, her hand never leaving his back. The weight of the situation pressed on her heart, but she remained steadfast, her love and determination unwavering.

As Rory continued to rub Jess’s back, she couldn’t help but notice how easily her fingers traced the ridges of his spine. He had always been lean, but now he felt so fragile under her touch. Each vertebra seemed to stand out sharply against his pale skin, a stark reminder of the toll his illness had taken on his body.

Her worry deepened, but she kept her touch light and soothing, hoping to bring him some comfort. Jess stirred, a soft moan of discomfort escaping his lips. His face twisted into a grimace, and his body tensed, even in sleep.

“Shh, it’s okay, Jess,” Rory whispered, her voice gentle and calming. She pressed a soft kiss to the back of his neck and resumed the slow, rhythmic circles on his back.

Jess’s breathing hitched, and for a moment, Rory feared he might wake up in pain. But then, gradually, his body began to relax again. The lines of tension smoothed from his face, and his breathing evened out.

Rory continued her soothing ministrations, murmuring quiet words of reassurance whenever he made another sound of discomfort. She was determined to be his rock, his steady source of comfort and love.

Despite her own exhaustion and worry, she stayed vigilant, her touch never wavering. She knew how much he needed her, and she would be there for him, every step of the way. As she felt him finally settle into a deeper, more restful sleep, Rory allowed herself a moment of relief, her heart swelling with love and determination to see him through this battle.

Lorelai and Luke returned to the room, their expressions soft but concerned. Lorelai gently touched Rory’s shoulder, causing her to look up from where she was sitting beside Jess.

“Hey, kiddo,” Luke said softly, his eyes lingering on Jess’s sleeping form. “Why don’t you let us stay with Jess tonight? You’ve been here nonstop. You need some rest.”

Rory shook her head, her hand still resting on Jess’s back. “I told Jess I’d be here. I can’t leave him.”

Lorelai knelt beside Rory, her voice filled with motherly concern. “Sweetie, you’ve been amazing, but you need to take care of yourself too. You can’t help Jess if you’re completely exhausted.”

Rory’s eyes filled with determination. “I’m not leaving him, mom. He needs me here.”

Luke sighed, exchanging a worried glance with Lorelai. “We understand that, Rory, but you’re no good to him if you’re running on empty. Just a few hours of rest at home. We’ll call you if anything changes.”

Rory bit her lip, torn between her own exhaustion and her promise to Jess. “I know you’re right, but I can’t break my promise to him. He’s been through so much, and he needs to know I’m here.”

Lorelai’s eyes softened as she hugged Rory gently. “We know how much you love him, and we’re so proud of you. But you can’t do this alone. Let us help.”

Rory hugged her mom back, tears brimming in her eyes. “I just don’t want him to wake up and not find me here. It would break his heart.”

Luke placed a reassuring hand on Rory’s shoulder. “He’ll understand, Rory. And he’ll be in good hands. You know he trusts us.”

After a long moment, Rory nodded reluctantly, though she didn’t move from her spot. “Just for a little while,” she finally agreed, her voice barely above a whisper. “But if anything changes, you call me immediately.”

“Of course,” Lorelai said, brushing a strand of hair from Rory’s face. “Go get some rest. We’ll take care of Jess.”

Rory stood slowly, giving Jess one last kiss on the forehead. “I’ll be back soon,” she whispered to him, even though he was asleep.

As Rory gathered her things, Luke and Lorelai watched her with a mixture of pride and concern. They knew how hard it was for her to leave, but they also knew it was necessary. They needed to take care of themselves as much as they needed to take care of Jess.

Chapter Text

Jess was floating somewhere in between consciousness and being knocked out. He desperately tried to fall deeper into dreamland, knowing that he’d be met with the uncomfortable symptoms that came with fighting cancer if he were to wake up again. He kept hearing familiar voices, but he didn’t quite remember who they were.

“Rory told me that Jess opened up to her about his childhood.” He remembered a Rory. And Jess, that name sounded familiar.

“What did he tell her?” It was a male voice. He had definitely heard that one before.

“Some really bad stuff, Luke. I’m not sure you’re ready to hear it.” Damn, the conversation was quite serious. At least now he knew the other person. Luke. Yeah, it rang a bell.

“Things weren’t stable for him growing up, but I never knew of anything terrible. I kept asking them, but Liz would always deny it.” Huh, another name. He felt a shiver run through his body. Guess Liz wasn’t his favorite person in the world.

“She probably hid it. But Jess told Rory he was abused by Liz’s boyfriends and that Liz never tried to stop them.” Yeah, Liz certainly sounded like a doucebag. And that poor Jess guy. Hope he’s alright.

“What?!” The loud yell yanked Jess fully into consciousness. He sat up on the bed with a jolt and looked around the room with his eyes wide. The whole conversation registered in his mind now. They were talking about him. Fuck, of course they were.

Lorelai looked like she was about to cry. She was by Jess’s side at once, holding his shoulder. Luke was harder to read. The yell sounded angry. But now he looked sad and maybe even guilty.

“Jess, hey. Sorry we woke you”, Lorelai apologized, rubbing his shoulder lightly.

Jess wasn’t having any of it though. “She told you? And you told him?” He couldn’t believe his personal, extremely sensitive things were talked about by all of them. It wouldn’t be long until everyone in Stars Hollow would know. This was exactly why he never told anyone.

Lorelai’s face flashed with pure terror. She realized Jess had heard them. “Please don’t be mad with Rory. She only told me because she felt overwhelmed.”

“I’m not mad with Rory. I’m mad with you”, Jess stated, pushing her hand off his shoulder. He wiggled further from her on the bed but could only get so far before he was met with the railing.

Luke decided now was a good time to open his mouth. “Is it true Jess? Did they hurt you?”

“Yes, it’s fucking true. Why would I make this shit up?” Jess asked angrily. Before Luke could say anything else, Jess continued. Better get it all out then. “They hit and kicked me until I was hyperventilating, and Liz wouldn’t bat an eye. She’d let them in day after another and I’d hide in closets but they would always find me. And while we’re on the topic of Liz, did you know your dear sister would do drugs right in front of me and I would be the one to clean up the needles? She would also leave me alone for days with no food in the house and basically ignored my existence my entire childhood.”

Luke's face turned ashen as he listened to Jess's outburst. He looked like he had been punched in the gut, his eyes wide with horror and disbelief. Lorelai’s tears spilled over, her hands covering her mouth as she choked back a sob.

“I’m so sorry, Jess,” Luke finally managed to say, his voice thick with emotion. “I had no idea. I should’ve been there for you.”

Jess’s anger simmered beneath the surface, his chest rising and falling with each labored breath. “Yeah, well, you weren’t,” he snapped. “None of you were. So don’t act all shocked and sorry now.”

Lorelai moved closer again, her voice trembling. “Jess, we had no idea it was this bad. We thought—”

“You thought what?” Jess interrupted, his eyes blazing. “That it was just tough for a while? That Liz was just struggling a bit? You didn’t bother to find out the truth, did you?” It was aimed toward Luke. Lorelai obviously had no idea.

Luke stepped forward, his expression pained. “Jess, if I had known, I would’ve taken you in. I would’ve done anything to protect you.”

Jess’s shoulders slumped, the weight of his words and the truth behind them pressing down on him. “It’s too late for that now, Luke. What’s done is done.”

Lorelai tried to reach out to him again, but he recoiled, his eyes filled with a mix of anger and hurt. “Don’t,” he warned, his voice cracking. “Just... don’t.”

The room fell into a heavy silence, the only sound the faint beeping of the monitors. Jess’s breathing was ragged, and he could feel the fever creeping back, making him feel even more miserable.

“Jess, we’re here now,” Luke said softly, his voice barely above a whisper. “We can’t change the past, but we can be here for you now. Let us help.”

Jess closed his eyes, trying to block out the overwhelming emotions crashing over him. He wanted to believe them, wanted to trust that they could be there for him now, but the scars of his past ran deep.

“I just want to sleep,” he muttered, turning away from them.

Lorelai nodded, wiping her tears. “Okay, sweetie. We’ll let you rest.”

Luke and Lorelai exchanged a worried glance before slowly backing out of the room, giving Jess the space he needed. As they closed the door behind them, Luke’s hand found Lorelai’s, gripping it tightly.

“We have to make this right,” Luke said, his voice filled with determination.

Lorelai nodded, her eyes still glistening with tears. “We will, Luke. We will.”

Jess lay back down, his body aching and his mind racing. Rory’s earlier comfort felt like a distant memory now. He curled into himself, trying to convince his brain that he was safe and there was no need to be so worked up.

Outside of Jess's room, Lorelai leaned against the wall, trying to collect herself. She wiped away the tears that continued to stream down her face, feeling a heavy weight of guilt and sorrow. Luke paced back and forth, his hands shoved into his pockets, his face a mix of anger and concern.

“I had no idea, Lorelai,” Luke said, his voice barely above a whisper. “All this time, and I never knew. I should have checked in more. I should have been there for him.”

Lorelai reached out, stopping Luke’s pacing by placing a hand on his arm. “You couldn’t have known, Luke. Liz always kept things close to the vest. But we know now, and we can do something about it.”

Luke nodded, but his expression remained troubled. “Yeah, but what if he doesn’t want us to? What if he doesn’t want me here?”

Lorelai sighed, looking back at the closed door. “I think he does, Luke. He just needs time to process everything. But right now, I don’t think he wants to see me. I should go home. Give him some space.”

Luke frowned, clearly conflicted. “Are you sure? I don’t want you to leave thinking this is your fault. It’s not.”

Lorelai gave him a small, sad smile. “I know, but he needs you right now. He needs someone who can be strong for him, and you’re the best person for that. I’ll come back later, once he’s had some time.”

Luke pulled her into a tight hug, holding her close. “Thank you, Lorelai. For everything.”

She nodded against his chest, pulling back after a moment. “Take care of him, Luke. He needs you.”

“I will,” Luke promised, his voice firm.

Lorelai gave him one last encouraging smile before turning to leave, her footsteps echoing softly down the hallway.

Luke took a deep breath and pushed open the door to Jess’s room. Jess was still curled up on the bed, looking smaller and more vulnerable than Luke had ever seen him. He quietly walked over to the chair beside the bed and sat down, watching Jess with a mixture of sadness and determination.

“Hey, Jess,” Luke said softly, not expecting a response.

Jess stirred slightly, his eyes fluttering open. He looked at Luke, his expression weary but less guarded than before. “Where’s Rory?” he asked with a hoarse voice.

“We forced her to go home to rest. She’ll be back later.” Luke leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “I’m not going anywhere, okay? I’m staying right here with you.”

Jess didn’t say anything, but the tension in his shoulders seemed to ease a bit. He turned his head back to the pillow, closing his eyes. Luke reached out and gently placed a hand on Jess’s back, hoping to offer some comfort.

“We’ll get through this, Jess,” Luke said quietly. “I’m here for you. Always.”

Jess didn’t respond, but the subtle relaxation of his body told Luke that his words had been heard. Luke settled back in the chair, keeping a watchful eye on his nephew, ready to be there for him, no matter what.

Luke watched as Jess buried his face in his pillow. He was sleeping on his stomach again and his back was gently rising and falling with every breath he took. The guarded position reminded Luke of younger Jess, a boy he had seen way too little of. His heart ached just thinking about everything Jess had had to endure during his short life, and he hadn’t had a clue. He was just living his life while his nephew had suffered. How could he’ve been so selfish?

To be fair, Luke always had his doubts about Liz’s parenting, or rather the lack of it. Whenever they would visit Stars Hollow when Jess was younger, Liz always seemed too preoccupied to pay any mind to Jess. Luke always thought it was only because she was excited to be back in her hometown and she had a million things in her mind about what to do and who to meet. But now Luke realized that she was always like that. But the shitty parenting he could somehow tolerate. Sure, it wasn’t ideal and definitely left some emotional scars on Jess, but that could be just played as a lack of knowledge and better judgment.

What Luke couldn’t ignore was the abuse. He got worked up just thinking about it. How could she watch her son get beaten up by her boyfriends and still continue to let them into their house, let them continue hurting Jess? How could she sleep at night? Luke couldn’t believe he had helped his sister out so many times, offered her a shoulder to cry on, and given her money when she actively let Jess get beaten up by different men. He was furious. And the drugs? That was a door he wasn’t willing to open yet. His head would explode otherwise.

But the worst thing was, that Jess still cared about his mother. When he first got the news about a relapse, he wanted to call Liz immediately, hoping that his mother would care enough to come see him. Even when he tried to be nonchalant about it, Luke knew he cared. There was a part of him that wanted to feel his mother’s love. And another part of him knew that he could never attain it.

Luke couldn’t take it anymore. He checked that Jess was definitely still asleep and stepped out of the room. He had to call Liz, to confront her. He knew it wouldn’t fix anything, but she needed her to know that he knew. He knew how terrible of a mother she had been and if he had known back then, he would’ve taken her to court to get Jess’s custody.

The phone rang so long that Luke thought Liz wasn’t going to answer. Just as he was about to give up, she picked up.

“Hey big brother. Miss me already?” she sounded drunk for sure.

“Liz, I know what you did.”

“What do you mean? I’ve done many things”, Liz giggled.

“I know you let those men hurt Jess. I know you did drugs. I know that you were a shitty mom and I’m just going to tell you that if I had known back then, you wouldn’t have had Jess for very long. I would’ve done everything in my power to get him as far away from you as possible”, Luke hissed in anger. A few nurses looked at him with concern as they passed him in the corridor.

“Maybe I should’ve told you back then. My life would’ve been so much easier without that little smart ass.”

Luke felt a surge of anger course through him at Liz's callous response. He tightened his grip on the phone, his knuckles turning white. The audacity of her words made his blood boil, but he struggled to keep his voice steady.

"How can you say that?" Luke seethed, trying to contain his fury. "He’s your son, Liz. Your responsibility. And you just... abandoned him, over and over."

Liz let out a bitter laugh. "Oh, please. Don't act all high and mighty. You were never there either, Luke. You only swoop in now because you think you're better than me."

"That's not true, and you know it," Luke shot back, his voice rising. "I tried to help, but you pushed me away every time. And now I find out you were letting those men hurt him? You were using drugs around him? How could you be so careless, so selfish?"

Liz's tone turned defensive. "You don't understand, Luke. It was hard for me too. I had my own problems, my own issues. Jess was... He was a handful, okay? I didn't know how to deal with him."

"That's no excuse," Luke retorted, his voice cold. "You were supposed to protect him, not expose him to danger. You failed him, Liz. And now he’s paying the price for your mistakes."

There was a long silence on the other end of the line. When Liz finally spoke, her voice was softer, almost resigned. "You think I don't know that? You think I don't regret every damn day? I couldn't handle him, Luke. I couldn't handle being a mom."

Luke took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. "Regret doesn't fix what happened, Liz. It doesn't undo the damage. Jess deserved better, and it's too late to change the past, but you need to own up to your mistakes. He needs to hear that from you, not from me."

Liz sighed heavily. "I don't know if I can do that. I... I don't know what to say to him."

"Figure it out," Luke snapped. "He deserves at least that much from you. And don't you dare think about contacting him until you're ready to apologize properly. He doesn't need any more pain from you."

With that, Luke ended the call, his hands shaking with frustration. He leaned against the wall, closing his eyes and taking deep breaths to steady himself. The conversation had left him feeling drained, but he knew it was necessary. Jess needed to hear the truth from his mother, no matter how difficult it was.

Luke pushed the phone back into his pocket and headed back to Jess's room. As he opened the door, he saw Jess stirring slightly on the bed, still asleep but restless. Luke walked over and gently adjusted the blanket, ensuring Jess was comfortable. He sat back down in the chair, his large hand resting on Jess’s back.

“I’m so sorry Jess. I didn’t know. I’m sorry I let that happen to you”, Luke whispered. He wanted to reach out to pet the sleeping boy’s hair, but he didn’t want to disturb him too much. And it also felt like too much affection. It would be okay if Jess was eight, but he was eighteen and even though Luke was better at rubbing his back and holding his shoulder, he still felt a bit awkward doing more. He wasn’t sure how Jess felt about it all, but he no longer flinched away from his touch and Luke could sometimes feel the boy relax under his touch, so he took it as a positive sign.

Instead, Luke kept his hand on Jess’s back, feeling the soft fabric of the boy’s t-shirt under his fingers. Jess was feeling hot again, the fever-reducer effect waning. But Luke got comfort from the way he felt the boy breathing peacefully. He was alive and he was at peace, at least for a while.

Emily came in sometime later. She gave Luke a smile and even though Luke couldn’t see her face because of the mask, he could see her eyes smile. As she turned her gaze towards the sleeping boy, her eyes softened. Jess had successfully buried himself under his blankets and pillows.

“I don’t know if I can check his vitals when he’s hiding from the world like that”, Emily chuckled lightly.

Luke smiled too. “He’s good at that. But I can help you move him if necessary.”

Emily checked the monitors first, making sure everything was stable. She then gently peeled back the blanket. “If we could shift him to his back, it would be easier to get his pulse and blood pressure”, she said.

Luke nodded, leaning in to gently shift Jess onto his back. "Alright, let's do this carefully," he whispered, more to himself than anyone else. He moved with a practiced gentleness, aware of Jess's fragile state. As he adjusted Jess's position, the boy stirred slightly, his brow furrowing as if in discomfort, but he didn't fully wake.

Emily swiftly moved in, placing her stethoscope on Jess's chest. The faint rise and fall of his breathing was the only sound in the quiet room. She monitored his heartbeat, then wrapped the blood pressure cuff around his arm, giving it a gentle squeeze.

As she worked, Jess's eyes fluttered open briefly, a confused and sleepy expression on his face. He looked at Luke and then at Emily, trying to grasp the situation. "What's happening?" he mumbled, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Just a quick check-up, Jess," Emily said softly, offering him a reassuring smile. "You were sleeping so peacefully, we didn't want to disturb you too much."

Jess nodded, already drifting back towards sleep. Luke watched him, concern etched on his face. He knew Jess was struggling, and seeing him so vulnerable was hard. As Emily finished her checks and started to pack up, she looked at Luke.

"He's doing okay, considering," she said quietly. "The fever's still there, but his vitals are stable. We'll keep monitoring him closely."

"Thanks, Emily," Luke replied, his voice thick with gratitude.

Emily gave him a small nod. "No problem. Just keep an eye on him and let us know if anything changes."

Just as Emily was about to exit, Dr. Parker walked through the door. His emotions were hard to read through the mask, but Luke had a bad feeling about it.

He glanced at the monitor before addressing Luke and the nurse. "We got the latest blood work results back," he began, looking directly at Luke. "Jess's blood cell counts are dangerously low—both red and white blood cells, as well as platelets. This is all fairly normal after a bone marrow transplant.”

Luke's face tensed with concern. "What does that mean?"

Dr. Parker continued, "It means Jess needs a blood transfusion. The low red blood cells are causing his fatigue and weakness, and the low white blood cells put him at risk for more infections. His platelet count is also low, increasing his risk of bleeding. We need to stabilize him as soon as possible."

Emily nodded in agreement. "We'll start preparing for the transfusion right away."

As Jess lay on the hospital bed, the medical team prepared for the transfusion. The room was calm, yet a focused energy filled the space. They brought in the necessary supplies: bags of blood, sterile gloves, and tubing. The lights cast a soft glow, adding a clinical yet secure feel to the environment.

Jess had an IV line in his arm but given his recent bone marrow transplant and ongoing treatments, he also had a port in his chest. The port allowed easy access to his veins, making procedures like transfusions less invasive and more comfortable. The team decided to use the port for the blood transfusion, as it was the most efficient and least painful option.

Emily approached his bedside. With careful hands, she cleaned the area around the port with an antiseptic swab. Jess stirred slightly at the cold sensation, his eyes fluttering open. He looked around, momentarily confused by the activity and the equipment around him.

“Jess, hey, it’s okay,” Luke's voice broke through Jess's haze of confusion. Luke stood close, his expression calm and reassuring. “They’re just starting the transfusion. It’s going to help you feel better.”

Jess’s eyes locked onto Luke’s, seeking reassurance. Emily gently inserted the needle into the port, connecting the tubing to the blood bag. Jess winced slightly, the sensation unfamiliar and uncomfortable, but he remained still, trusting the team and Luke’s calming presence.

As the blood began to flow through the tubing and into Jess’s body, he felt a cool sensation spread from his chest. His breathing quickened slightly, a subconscious reaction to the unfamiliar feeling. Sensing his discomfort, Luke reached out and placed a hand on Jess’s shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze.

“Just breathe, Jess,” Luke said softly. “It’s going to be okay. You’re doing great.”

Jess exhaled slowly, his body relaxing under Luke’s steady gaze and the gentle weight of his hand. He felt the tension ease as the warm blanket was pulled up around his shoulders. The steady hum of the machines and the soft murmurs of the medical staff faded into the background, replaced by the steady rhythm of his own breathing and the comforting presence of Luke beside him.

Dr. Parker was following Jess closely as they began the transfusion. "Hey there, Jess," Dr. Parker began in a calm, soothing tone. He glanced at the monitor, ensuring everything was proceeding smoothly with the transfusion. "I know this might be a bit overwhelming, but you're doing really well."

Jess's brow furrowed slightly as he struggled to focus. "What's... what's happening?" he murmured, his voice thick with fatigue. He glanced around the room, trying to make sense of the tubes and machines surrounding him.

Dr. Parker pulled up a chair and sat down at Jess's bedside, keeping his tone gentle and reassuring. "You're getting a blood transfusion right now," he explained, carefully choosing his words. "Your blood cell counts were a bit low, which can happen after a bone marrow transplant. The transfusion is going to help replenish those cells and give your body some much-needed support."

Jess nodded slowly, though it was clear he wasn't fully grasping the situation. His eyes flickered to the blood bag hanging beside him, then back to Dr. Parker. "Is it... bad?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

"No, it's not bad," Dr. Parker assured him, keeping his voice steady. "It's actually quite normal in cases like yours. Your body is still adjusting to the new bone marrow, and sometimes it needs a little help to keep things running smoothly. The transfusion is just a way to make sure you're getting what you need."

Jess's eyes drifted shut for a moment before he forced them open again, his confusion evident. "Will it... make me better?" he asked, his voice tinged with a hint of vulnerability.

Dr. Parker nodded encouragingly. "It's a step in the right direction," he said. "The transfusion will help boost your energy and make it easier for your body to fight off any infections. We're keeping a close eye on you, and we'll continue to do everything we can to help you recover."

Jess let out a slow breath, the words providing some comfort even if the full meaning didn't completely register. He felt a warm hand clasp his, and he turned to see Luke sitting beside him, offering a supportive smile.

"You're in good hands, Jess," Luke added, squeezing his hand gently. "Just focus on resting and getting better. We're all here for you."

Jess managed a small nod, the combined reassurance from Dr. Parker and Luke gradually easing his anxiety. His grip on Luke’s hand loosened as he drifted back into a fitful sleep, his body finally beginning to absorb the life-giving blood that would help stabilize his condition.

Luke stayed by Jess’s side, watching as the blood bag gradually emptied. The transfusion was a small, yet crucial step in Jess’s recovery, offering hope that he would soon regain some strength. As the medical team quietly monitored the process, Luke kept his vigil, ensuring Jess remained as comfortable and calm as possible through the procedure.

 Luke had dozed off for a moment, but he was rudely woken up by Jess. The boy had thrown his blankets to the side and he was ripping his shirt off but it got tangled in his IV wires which he almost ripped off in the process.

“Wow, Jess slow down. What’s wrong?” Luke asked concerned as he jumped to his feet.

“It’s hot. I’m so hot”, Jess moaned as he lay flat on the bed with just pajama pants on, hanging a bit low on his hips.

Luke was confused, because the room temperature was the exact same as before, and Jess had been freezing then. He figured it was the blood transfusion doing its part, or maybe just the fever confusing Jess’s body.

“Do you need anything?” Luke asked the boy.

He nodded. “Ice water.” Jess was fanning the air with his hand in a desperate attempt to cool himself down. The window in his room didn’t open and even if it did, it was hotter outside than indoors, so there really wasn’t much he could do. But he knew he’d rather die of heat stroke than take his pants off in front of Luke.

Luke exited the room and quickly got Jess his ice water from the family room nearby. Jess was sitting up on the bed when he returned. He handed the cup to Jess and watched as he took a small sip and then proceeded to pour the rest on his head.

“Jess! What the hell? Your bed is soaking now”, he yelled, taken aback by Jess’s unusual behavior.

“It’s fine Uncle Luke. It’ll cool me down even more.”

Jess’s black hair was dripping wet now and the water slid down his torso and onto the bedding. Luke shook his head disapprovingly but decided not to say anything. The kid was ill with cancer for the second time. Luke would probably let him rob a bank without batting an eye.

Instead, he said: “Should I get a nurse to check this out? It shouldn’t be normal to be so overheated by a few blankets.”

“Nah, it’s fine. I’m cooler already.”

Luke knew now wasn’t the best moment, but he really needed to talk to Jess about what happened earlier with Lorelai. He sighed and considered his words. “Jess, about Liz-“ he began but Jess cut him off.

“Luke, I don’t want to talk about it, okay?” Jess said with a stern expression on his face that told Luke not to fuck around the subject.

Luke didn’t want to drop it so easily, but he didn’t want to upset Jess. “Fine.”

Silence filled the room for a few minutes. The cool waterdrops felt nice against Jess’s burning skin. He sat there, fidgeting with his fingers. He decided to shake Luke’s world a bit more.

“I called Jimmy.”

“You what?” Luke’s mouth was hanging wide open as he stared at his nephew like he just said that he was pregnant.

“I called him the other day.”

Luke shook his head, trying to wrap his mind around the idea. Jimmy, the man who had walked out on Jess and Liz without a second thought, the man who had never been a part of Jess's life, had been contacted by his son. It was a scenario Luke had never anticipated. He had strong feelings about Jimmy, none of them positive. In Luke's eyes, Jimmy was a coward who had abandoned his responsibilities and left Liz to struggle on her own with a newborn. He couldn't fathom how anyone could do that to their child.

Luke knew he needed to tread carefully. Jess had reached out to his father, a man who was little more than a stranger to him. There was no telling what that conversation had stirred up for Jess. Suppressing his anger toward Jimmy, Luke focused on Jess, trying to gauge how he was feeling about the whole thing.

“How did it go?” Luke asked, his voice softening as he sought to understand.

Jess shrugged, his expression a mixture of nonchalance and something more complex. "Fine, I guess. He wasn't the brightest guy."

“Oh, that I know. I really don’t know where you got it from kid. Not from either of your parents, that’s for sure.”

Jess allowed himself a small, wry smile at Luke's words.

But Luke's mind was still racing. He wanted to ask so many questions: What had Jimmy said? How did Jess feel about it? Did he want to see Jimmy? But he knew he needed to be careful, to give Jess the space to share what he was comfortable with.

"Do you... want to talk about it?" Luke asked tentatively, not wanting to push but needing to offer the opportunity.

Jess looked down at his hands. He seemed to be weighing his words carefully. "He was surprised to hear from me," Jess finally said. "He didn't even know I was sick. I don't know... I guess I just wanted to know why he left,”

Luke felt a pang in his chest at the quiet vulnerability in Jess's voice. He had always tried to be there for Jess, to make up for the absence of his father, but he knew there were some things he just couldn't replace. "What did he tell you?” Luke asked gently.

Jess shrugged, the gesture carrying a hint of defensiveness. "Not much. Just that he was young and stupid." He glanced away, clearly uncomfortable with the conversation. "It didn't really change anything."

Luke nodded, understanding that Jess was holding back. "I can imagine that wasn't easy to hear."

Jess let out a short, humorless laugh. "Yeah, well, I wasn't expecting much." He fidgeted with the ring on his finger, avoiding Luke's gaze. "I just... I guess I wanted to know why, you know?"

Luke's heart ached for Jess. He knew the boy had carried the weight of his father's abandonment for years, and it was a burden no one should have to bear alone. "It's okay to want answers, Jess. And it's okay if you didn't get them."

Jess's jaw tightened, a clear sign that he was done talking about it. "Yeah, well, it's whatever," he muttered, his voice flat. "Just another thing to deal with."

Luke sighed, recognizing Jess's reluctance to dive deeper into his feelings. He wished he could do more, say something that would help, but he knew Jess needed space to process everything in his own time. "If you ever want to talk about it, I'm here," he offered, trying to keep his tone casual.

Jess laid back against his pillows but only a few minutes later, he was pulling one of the blankets on him again. Luke raised an eyebrow at the sudden change.

“Don’t tell me you're cold now?” he said a bit jokingly, but Jess’s uncomfortable look on his face told him the answer already. Luke sighed. He pressed the call button so that Jess could get fresh, dry sheets on his bed again.

Fortunately, Emily was very understanding of the situation, she helped Jess stand up and walked him over to the armchair wrapped in a blanket while she efficiently changed the sheets. Jess was shivering on the chair, feeling annoyed that his body was playing tricks on him. Luke stood behind him, his hand resting on Jess’s shoulder as he watched Emily working.

“Okay, all done now. Let’s get you settled. I do want to check your vitals real quick before I let you sleep though”, she said gently as she and Luke helped Jess back onto the bed.

“Thanks”, Jess mumbled once he was comfortable again.

Emily quickly but gently positioned the blood pressure cuff around Jess's arm and adjusted the thermometer under his tongue. She maintained a calm demeanor, which helped soothe Jess despite his obvious discomfort. As the thermometer beeped, Emily noted the reading, a slight furrow appearing on her brow. She then checked his pulse and listened to his heart and lungs with her stethoscope.

Jess lay back, feeling every shiver and twitch of his fevered body. "Jess, your temperature is still quite high," she explained gently. "That's why you're feeling so hot and then suddenly cold. The fever can cause your body to have these hot and cold flashes. It's your body's way of trying to fight off the infection, but it can be uncomfortable."

She placed the back of her hand on Jess's forehead, feeling the heat radiating off him. "The fever makes your body think it's colder than it is, so sometimes you'll shiver and feel cold. Then, as your body tries to cool down, you'll feel really hot. It's all part of the fever response."

Jess nodded, his eyes glazed with fatigue and discomfort. "So, nothing I can do about it?" he asked, his voice low and raspy.

Emily gave him a reassuring smile. "We can manage the symptoms. I've already given you some medicine to help bring the fever down, and the cold water you poured over yourself will help a bit too. But the best thing you can do right now is rest and let your body fight off the infection."

She gently pressed her fingers against his pulse point, counting the beats per minute. "Your pulse is a little fast, which is normal with a fever. Just try to stay comfortable. If you feel too cold or too hot, let us know, and we'll adjust things to help you."

As she finished up, Emily wrapped Jess in a fresh blanket, ensuring he was comfortable. "I'll be keeping an eye on your vitals, and if there's anything you need, just press the call button. We're here to help you through this."

Jess managed a weak smile. "Thanks, Emily," he murmured, his eyes already starting to close. The combination of fever, exhaustion, and the medications coursing through his system was taking its toll.

Luke, who had been silently watching the whole time, felt a surge of gratitude for Emily's gentle care. He squeezed Jess's shoulder reassuringly as the boy drifted back into a restless sleep. "We'll be here, Jess," Luke whispered, even though he wasn't sure Jess could hear him. "Just hang in there."

Rory quietly entered Jess's hospital room, her eyes immediately finding him sleeping soundly, his face flushed with fever. Luke was seated beside the bed, his expression a mix of concern and weariness. He glanced up as Rory approached, offering her a tired but welcoming smile.

"Hey," Rory whispered, careful not to wake Jess. She pulled up a chair beside Luke, her eyes never leaving Jess's face. "How's he doing?"

Luke sighed, leaning back in his chair. "It's been a bit of a rough day. Jess has been having these hot and cold flashes. At one point, he was so hot he dumped a cup of ice water over his head," he recounted, shaking his head slightly. "Then, not long after, he was shivering and asking for more blankets."

Rory's eyes widened, a small smile tugging at her lips despite the seriousness of the situation. "He poured ice water on himself?" she repeated, a mix of amusement and disbelief in her voice.

Luke nodded, his own smile breaking through. "Yeah, right over his head. Soaking wet, and the bed was a mess. Emily had to come in and change the sheets while he sat wrapped up in a blanket. It was... quite a scene," he chuckled softly, the moment offering a brief, much-needed lightness amidst the tension.

Rory couldn't help but giggle, covering her mouth with her hand to stifle the sound. "That sounds like Jess," she said, shaking her head affectionately. "Always finding unconventional ways to deal with things."

Luke chuckled along with her, feeling a bit of the weight lift from his shoulders. "Yeah, he's definitely something," he agreed, glancing back at his sleeping nephew. Jess's breathing was steady, and despite the fever's obvious toll, he seemed to be resting peacefully for the moment.

Rory reached out, gently brushing a stray lock of hair from Jess's forehead. She could feel the heat radiating off his skin, and her heart ached for him. "I'm glad he’s resting now. He needs all the strength he can get."

Luke nodded in agreement. "Yeah, he does.”

Jess didn’t stay peaceful for long. Soon, he started thrashing around again and kicked the blankets off him, breathing heavily. His skin was flushed and sweat began to bead on his forehead. Rory and Luke, both watching him with growing concern, immediately sprang into action.

“Jess, hey, take it easy,” Luke said, moving to the side of the bed. “What’s going on?”

Jess groaned, struggling to find words. “Hot... too hot,” he mumbled, wiping a hand across his damp forehead. He laid on the bed flat on his back, trying to cool his fevered skin.

Rory quickly grabbed a cloth and some cool water from a basin nearby. She gently pressed the cool cloth against Jess's forehead, trying to bring some relief. "Here, let me help," she murmured, her voice soothing. She dabbed at his face and neck, the coolness of the cloth making him sigh in temporary relief. His eyes pressed closed as Rory continued to run the cloth down to his neck and torso.

Luke pressed his hand on Jess’s cheek to feel his temperature. He grimaced as he felt it.

“I hate this”, Jess mumbled. He was exhausted and he hated his body for making him so uncomfortable. Jess lay back on the bed, eyes closed, trying to focus on the coolness of Rory's cloth as it moved gently across his overheated skin. The room felt stifling despite the steady hum of the air conditioner, and his body ached with the relentless waves of heat.

“I know kid”, Luke sighed. “Is there anything we can do for you?”

Jess shook his head weakly, his breath coming in shallow gasps. "Just... stay," he whispered, barely audible. The simple request made Rory and Luke exchange a glance filled with unspoken concern and determination to do whatever they could to help him through this.

Rory continued to work with the cloth, now dipping it back into the cool water and pressing it along Jess's arms and chest. She could see the sweat beading on his skin, and the sight filled her with a deep sadness. This wasn’t fair—he shouldn’t have to endure this kind of suffering.

Jess's breathing was heavy and uneven, his discomfort palpable. He tried to push away the cool cloth at one point, but Rory gently guided his hand back down. "Just a little longer, okay?" she said softly. "It'll help."

Luke, meanwhile, moved to the side of the bed, placing a comforting hand on Jess's shoulder. He felt helpless, watching Jess struggle like this. "Jess, if you need anything—anything at all—you tell us, okay? We're here for you."

Jess nodded slightly, not trusting himself to speak. He hated feeling so vulnerable, so out of control. The hot and cold flashes were just another reminder of how weak his body had become, and it frustrated him to no end.

As Jess began to shiver again, his body betraying him with another sudden change, he instinctively reached for the blankets he had kicked off moments earlier. His teeth chattered slightly as he pulled the covers over himself, wrapping them tightly around his trembling frame. Rory, seeing him struggle to get warm, immediately moved closer, slipping under the blankets with him.

"Come here," she whispered gently, pulling Jess into her arms. She wrapped herself around him, trying to share her body heat and provide him with some comfort. The warmth of her body against his was soothing, and Jess let out a small sigh of relief as he nestled into her embrace.

Luke watched the two of them, his concern deepening but also feeling a sense of reassurance seeing Rory care for Jess so tenderly. It was clear how much they meant to each other, and that kind of emotional support was something Jess desperately needed right now. Luke stood back, giving them space but staying close enough in case Jess needed anything.

Jess's shivering slowly subsided as he absorbed the warmth from Rory's body. He felt exhausted, each shiver sapping more of his strength, but the comfort of Rory's presence made it easier to relax. She continued to hold him, rubbing gentle circles on his back and whispering soft reassurances.

"It's okay, Jess," Rory murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. "You're going to be alright. I'm here."

Jess, feeling the exhaustion finally taking over, managed to murmur a soft "thank you" before his eyes drifted shut. The rhythm of Rory's heartbeat and the warmth of her body were soothing, lulling him into a much-needed sleep.

Luke quietly settled back into his chair, watching over them. He could see the tension in Jess's face ease as he fell asleep, and Rory's protective hold never wavered. The room fell silent except for the faint beeping of the monitors and the soft sound of Jess's breathing.

“Is he asleep?” Luke asked quietly.

“Yeah”, Rory simply answered, stroking Jess’s hair softly.

Luke stood up from the chair. “I’ll go outside for a bit, grab some food. You need anything?”

“I could use a burger”, Rory said with a small smile.

Luke nodded, chuckling softly. "A burger it is. I'll see what I can find."

As he quietly left the room, Rory continued to stroke Jess's hair, her touch light and gentle. She watched him closely, noting the way his features relaxed in sleep, even as he clung tightly to her. The moments of peace were fleeting, but she cherished them, knowing how much Jess was enduring.

Rory sighed softly, thinking about everything that had happened. Jess had been through so much, and she wished she could take away his pain. She could feel his body occasionally shudder, a remnant of the fever and chills he was experiencing. She continued to hold him, whispering soothing words, hoping they reached him even in his sleep.

After a while, Jess stirred slightly, murmuring something unintelligible. Rory leaned in closer, pressing her forehead against his, hoping to calm him. His breathing evened out again, and she felt a small sense of relief. She couldn't do much to help him physically, but she could be there, offering whatever comfort she could.

Luke returned not long after, balancing a couple of takeout bags in his hands. He quietly set them down on the small table by the window and gave Rory a thumbs-up, indicating that he had found her burger. Rory smiled gratefully, carefully extricating herself from Jess's hold and slipping out of the bed. She pulled the blankets up around him, making sure he was still warm.

She sat next to Luke and they dug into their food, eating in silence while observing their sick family member. For a short moment, Rory felt like they were back in Luke’s diner, enjoying good food and good company. Despite the setting being different, she still felt a small sense of peace. The food wasn’t as good as at Luke’s, but she was enjoying spending time with Luke, and Jess although the boy was sleeping.

“Thanks, Luke”, Rory thanked him as she finished her burger. She wiped her mouth in a napkin and Luke smiled at her softly. “You’re welcome. Glad I could help.”

Rory looked at Luke, feeling a warm sense of gratitude. "You know, you've always been there for us," she said softly, her voice carrying a mix of admiration and affection. "For Jess, and for me and my mom. It means a lot."

Luke shifted a little uncomfortably, not used to receiving compliments so directly. He rubbed the back of his neck and gave a modest shrug. "Well, it's what family does, right?" he replied, his voice gruff but sincere. "We take care of each other. And you and your mom... you're like family."

Rory smiled, touched by his words. "Yeah, we are," she agreed, a soft warmth spreading in her chest. There was something about Luke's steady presence that always made her feel safe, like everything would be okay as long as he was around.

They both turned their gaze back to Jess, lying peacefully in the bed. The soft beeping of the monitors was a constant reminder of the battle he was fighting. Rory felt a swell of emotion, a mix of love, worry, and hope.

"He's going to get through this," Luke said suddenly, his voice filled with quiet determination. "Jess is tough. He's got a lot of people who care about him, who are pulling for him. And he's not the kind of kid who gives up easily."

Rory nodded, feeling a tear escape down her cheek. "I know. And he's not alone in this. None of us are."

Luke reached over and gently squeezed her shoulder. It was a simple gesture, but it carried so much meaning. In that moment, they were more than just a mismatched group of individuals brought together by circumstance. They were a family, bound by love and a shared determination to support one of their own through the toughest of times.

They sat in comfortable silence for a while longer, watching over Jess. Rory felt a deep sense of comfort knowing that Luke was there, a rock she could lean on. And she knew that no matter what happened, they would face it together, as a family.

Dr. Parker entered the room quietly, his expression a mix of professional focus and gentle concern. He nodded to Luke and Rory, acknowledging them before turning his attention to the sleeping boy. Jess was buried under a thick layer of blankets, his face barely visible.

With careful movements, Dr. Parker began to peel back the blankets, revealing Jess's pale but peaceful face. The doctor gently checked Jess's temperature, pulse, and overall condition, making sure not to disturb his sleep too much. Despite his care, Jess stirred slightly, mumbling incoherently before settling back down.

"Sorry, Jess," Dr. Parker whispered, more to himself. He then turned to Rory and Luke, who watched with anxious anticipation. "I have some good news. The latest blood work shows some promising signs. It looks like the engraftment of the bone marrow transplant is beginning."

Rory's eyes widened, a mix of relief and hope washing over her. "Really? That’s... that’s amazing," she whispered, almost afraid to believe it.

Luke leaned forward, his face serious. "So, what does that mean exactly? Is he out of the woods?"

Dr. Parker nodded, though he remained cautious. "It's an early indication, but it's a positive one. The new bone marrow is starting to produce blood cells, which is exactly what we want to see. However, it's still a delicate period. His immune system is very weak, so we're not out of the woods yet. But this is definitely a step in the right direction."

Rory felt tears prick at the corners of her eyes, a mix of joy and relief. She reached out and took Jess's hand, squeezing it gently. "Thank you, Dr. Parker. This... this gives us hope."

Dr. Parker smiled kindly. "It's a good sign, but we'll continue to monitor him closely. The next few weeks are critical. He'll need to be careful, and we'll have to watch for any signs of complications."

Luke nodded, absorbing the information. "We'll do whatever it takes," he said, his voice firm with determination. "He'll get through this."

As Dr. Parker finished his examination and left the room, Rory and Luke exchanged a glance. There was a renewed sense of optimism in the air, a feeling that maybe, just maybe, they were beginning to turn a corner in this long, difficult journey. Rory gently stroked Jess's hair, her heart swelling with love and hope for the boy who had already been through so much.

She kissed Jess’s forehead, her eyes scanning his face. “I love you”, she whispered. As Rory whispered her words of affection, she felt the weight of the past weeks lift slightly from her shoulders. Her eyes traced the contours of Jess’s face, noting the pale complexion and the faint lines of exhaustion. Despite everything, there was a peacefulness to his expression now, as if he were finding some respite from the pain and discomfort.

Luke watched the tender moment, a soft smile playing on his lips. He felt a surge of pride for Rory, who had shown such strength and resilience throughout Jess's illness. "He’s lucky to have you, Rory," Luke said quietly, his voice filled with genuine emotion. "You've been amazing through all this."

Rory looked up, meeting Luke's gaze. Her eyes glistened with unshed tears, a mix of relief and the deep love she felt for Jess. "I just want him to be okay," she said, her voice thick with emotion. "He’s been through so much, and he deserves a break."

Luke nodded, understanding her sentiment all too well. He reached out and gently squeezed her shoulder, offering silent support.

Jess stirred slightly, his eyelids fluttering as he struggled to emerge from the fog of sleep. His face twisted in discomfort, and a faint groan escaped his lips. Rory and Luke both leaned in closer, their expressions filled with concern.

"I don't feel good," Jess murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. His eyes remained closed, and he seemed to be drifting in and out of consciousness.

Rory gently stroked his hair, her voice soothing. "It's okay, Jess. You're safe, and we're right here with you. Just rest, okay?" She leaned down, pressing a light kiss to his forehead, her touch gentle and reassuring.

Luke placed a hand on Jess's shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze. "You're doing great, kid. Just hang in there. We're not going anywhere," he said softly, his tone steady and calm.

Jess's breathing hitched for a moment, and then he seemed to relax under their comforting presence. His body settled back into the bed, and his breathing became more even as he slipped back into sleep. Rory and Luke stayed close, watching over him with vigilant eyes, ready to offer whatever comfort they could.

Rory continued to gently stroke his hair, while Luke kept a protective hand on his shoulder. The love and support in the room were palpable, a quiet but powerful force. As Jess fell deeper into sleep, the room's atmosphere softened, filled with a sense of calm and solidarity.

A few hours later, Julie walked into the room, filling it with a sense of security and professionalism. Jess had remained asleep, although he didn’t seem completely peaceful with occasional mumbles and some tossing around. “How’s our Jess doing?” she asked as she flipped through the boy’s thick chart.

“He’s been better. He had these hot and cold flashes and he was saying he felt bad earlier”, Luke said, slight concern in his voice.

Julie nodded, her expression thoughtful as she listened to Luke's update. She approached Jess's bedside, her movements calm and practiced. "Let's see if we can make him a bit more comfortable," she said, her voice gentle.

She checked the monitors, confirming his vitals, then moved to the IV line. "I'm going to give him some medicine to help with the fever and discomfort," she explained, carefully administering the medication through Jess's IV. "This should help regulate his temperature and ease any pain or nausea he's feeling."

As the medicine flowed into Jess's system, Julie gently adjusted the blankets, ensuring they weren't too heavy or restrictive. She also checked the position of his port and IV, making sure everything was in place and functioning properly. "We want to keep him as comfortable as possible," she murmured, more to herself as she worked.

Julie then turned her attention to Jess's bed, making small adjustments to the incline and positioning him more comfortably. She gently lifted his head to add an extra pillow, supporting his neck and shoulders. "If he wakes up and feels warm again, we can use some cool compresses to help," she said, looking at Rory and Luke. "And if he feels cold, we have some warm blankets ready."

Jess stirred slightly, his eyelids fluttering but not quite opening. Julie brushed a hand gently across his forehead, checking for signs of fever. "There we go, Jess. Just rest now," she whispered, her tone soothing.

Rory and Luke watched as Julie finished her work, both grateful for her attentive care. Rory leaned in closer to Jess, brushing a strand of hair away from his forehead. "Thank you, Julie," she said quietly, her voice filled with gratitude.

Julie smiled, giving Rory and Luke a reassuring nod. "Of course. Just keep an eye on him, and let me know if anything changes," she instructed before stepping back to review the monitor readings one last time. "You're doing great, both of you. He's lucky to have such good support."

Chapter Text

Luke woke up from his light slumber. The room was dark, the only light coming from the monitors. Luke rubbed his eyes tiredly. Sleeping on small plastic chairs was never the deepest, restful kind of sleep. Rory was asleep next to Jess’s bed, her head resting on the edge of it.

Luke’s gaze drifted onto the bed, and he was surprised to see a figure sitting up on the bed with its head slumped down. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he could see the figure’s frame shaking. Then his clouded mind remembered who the figure on the bed was.

“Jess?” Luke whispered.

Jess lifted his head, surprised to find Luke awake. As the dim light hit Jess’s face, Luke could see the tears streaming down his face. His stomach dropped seeing his nephew like that.

Luke approached the bed swiftly but quietly, not wanting to wake Rory. “Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked with deep worry in his voice. He sat in front of Jess on the bed and placed his hand on Jess’s chin to get the boy to look at him.

“Nothing”, Jess mumbled and wiped his face with his arm. No one was supposed to see his breakdown. He didn’t want to bother them with his feelings. They already had to deal with so much because of him, the only thing he could do was to try not to add to it.

“Good one. Really believable Jess.” Luke tried to mask his worry with sarcasm. Despite the low lighting, Luke could see the redness in Jess’s eyes and just how soaked his face was. It was obvious he had been going at it for a while.

Jess pulled his knees to his chest, as if shielding himself from the world.

Luke felt his heart break seeing Jess so vulnerable, so closed off. He could tell there was more going on beneath the surface, but Jess's reluctance to open up made it hard to reach him. Luke took a deep breath, trying to find the right words to gently coax Jess into talking.

"Jess, I know it's hard, but you don't have to go through this alone," Luke said softly. "Whatever's going on in that head of yours, you can share it with me. I'm here for you."

Jess shook his head, biting his lip as fresh tears welled up in his eyes. "It's just... I'm tired," he finally whispered, his voice cracking. Luke waited, sensing there was more to come. "Not the kind of tired where I can just sleep it off. It's more than that."

Luke felt a pang in his chest as he listened, his hand still resting on Jess's knee, offering silent support. "Tired of what, Jess?"

Jess took a shaky breath, his voice barely above a whisper. "Of being sick. Of feeling like crap all the time. It's like... every day is a battle, and I'm just so damn tired of fighting. And everyone always says how strong I am, but I don’t feel strong at all. I feel so weak and so pathetic." His words came out in a rush as if he had been holding them back for so long and they were finally spilling out. "I just want to feel normal again. To not have to think about whether or not I'll make it through the next treatment or if I'll ever get to be... just me, without all this."

Luke's heart ached for Jess. He wanted to take all of Jess's pain and fear away, to somehow make everything better. But all he could do was sit there, feeling helpless and angry at the unfairness of it all. He swallowed hard, fighting back his own tears. "Jess, I wish I could take all this away from you. I really do. But I promise you, we're going to get through this. Together."

Jess's shoulders shook as he cried, his defenses finally crumbling. Luke wrapped an arm around him, holding him tight. "You're not alone, okay? You have me, Rory, and everyone else who loves you. We'll get through this, one day at a time. And if you ever feel like you can't, you lean on us. That's what we're here for."

Jess nodded, leaning into Luke's embrace, his tears soaking into Luke's shirt. For a moment, Luke felt like he was holding an eight-year-old Jess and not the eighteen-year-old one. He felt so small, so vulnerable and Luke was just glad the boy let him comfort him without flinching away.

Fresh tears were still rolling down Jess’s cheeks and he bit his lip to choke down his sobs, as to not wake up Rory. “I just feel like I’m failing at everything”, Jess whispered, figuring that while he was at it, he could let out all his feelings and failures.

Luke wasn’t usually good with feelings, but he knew he’d have to try his hardest to understand and help Jess through the difficult feelings he was experiencing. He found out that now that he was in the moment, he didn’t have to think much but the words just came out naturally. “You’re not failing, Jess. You’re doing everything right.”

Jess shook his head, pulling back slightly to look at Luke, his eyes red and puffy. "But I can't do anything, Luke. I can’t walk, I can’t eat, I can’t even leave this damn room. I just... I feel useless." His voice was thick with frustration and despair, each word dripping with the weight of his pain.

Luke's heart clenched at Jess's words. He wished there was some way to convince Jess that he wasn't defined by his illness, that being sick wasn't a measure of his worth. "Jess, listen to me," Luke said, his voice firm but gentle. "You're not useless. You're going through something really tough, and it's okay to feel overwhelmed. But don't think for a second that you're failing or letting anyone down. You've been so strong, facing all this with more courage than most people could muster."

Jess's gaze dropped to the bed, his expression doubtful. Luke cupped the back of his nephew's head, forcing Jess to meet his eyes. "You have to give yourself a break," Luke continued. "Just because you're not doing what you used to doesn't mean you're not doing anything important. Right now, your job is to focus on getting better. And that's not nothing. It's hard, and it's scary, but you're doing it."

Jess sniffled, wiping at his eyes with the back of his hand. "I just... I don't want to be a burden," he murmured, his voice barely audible.

Luke's heart broke a little more at the raw vulnerability in Jess's voice. He pulled Jess into a tighter hug, wishing he could somehow transfer some of his own strength to the boy. "Jess, you're not a burden," Luke said, his voice thick with emotion. "Not to me, not to Rory, not to anyone. We love you, and we're here for you because we want to be. We care about you. And you don't have to carry this alone. We're all in this together, every step of the way."

Jess clung to Luke, his grip tightening as if he was afraid to let go. For a long moment, they stayed like that, the silence in the room filled with the unspoken understanding that passed between them. It was a moment of raw honesty, of deep connection, and it left both of them feeling a little less alone in the world.

Eventually, Jess pulled back, his tears subsiding into quiet sniffles. He looked at Luke with a mixture of gratitude and exhaustion. "Thanks," he whispered, his voice hoarse but sincere.

Luke smiled, reaching out to gently brush a strand of hair away from Jess's forehead. "Anytime, Jess," he replied softly. "I'm always here for you. Remember that."

Jess nodded, a small, shaky smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "I will," he promised, his voice barely a whisper.

As Jess finally laid back down, Luke watched him, feeling a mix of relief and sadness. He hated seeing Jess struggle, but he was grateful that they could have these moments of connection, even in the midst of so much pain. As Jess's breathing evened out, indicating he had finally fallen asleep, Luke stayed by his side, watching over him like he always had, like he always would.

Luke didn’t go back to sleep that night. He couldn’t take his eyes off Jess for long enough, afraid that if he were to, he’d find Jess sitting up and crying again. But that didn’t happen. Jess stayed asleep and although he wasn’t all too peaceful, he was resting.

When Jess woke up that morning, his eyes were sore and puffy. Rory noticed this immediately, her concern etched across her face. “Jess, your eyes... are you okay?” she asked gently, her voice filled with worry.

Jess waved a hand dismissively, trying to downplay his discomfort. “Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired, I guess,” he mumbled, avoiding her gaze. He didn’t want to make a big deal out of it and he’d rather keep his breakdown from Rory. It was embarrassing enough to have Luke witness it.

Rory wasn’t convinced, but she didn’t press him. Instead, she gave him a soft smile and reached over to smooth his hair. “How are you feeling?”

Jess managed a small smile. “Not as crappy as before.”

Rory leaned in to kiss his cheek and Jess leaned into her touch. “That’s good to hear.”

Luke, who had been standing by the window, turned to face them. He had been quietly watching the interaction, feeling both protective and helpless. He walked over to the bed, carrying a tray with breakfast. “I brought you some breakfast,” he said, setting the tray down on the small table next to the bed. “I thought maybe some toast and scrambled eggs would be good for your stomach.”

Jess glanced at the tray, a small smile playing on his lips. “Thanks, Luke,” he said, his voice soft.

He hadn’t eaten much in the past days. His nausea had eased up a bit and now he didn’t completely hate the idea of eating. He sat up slowly and took a fork to his shaky hand. They all noticed but decided not to comment on how Jess barely managed to hold the fork still enough to keep the scrambled egg on it.

As Jess ate, Rory continued to fuss over him, making sure he was comfortable and had everything he needed. “Do you need another blanket? Or maybe some more pillows?” she asked, her voice light and caring.

Jess shook his head, smiling slightly at her attentiveness. “I’m good, Rory. Thanks,” he said, his voice still a bit raspy from sleep.

Luke reached over and handed Jess a glass of water. “Here, drink this,” he said. “It’ll help with the soreness.”

Jess took the glass and sipped it gratefully. He felt the cool liquid traveling inside of him.  As Jess sipped the water, Rory gently rubbed his back, and Luke sat on the edge of the bed, making sure Jess was comfortable. The room was quiet, filled with a soft, comforting silence.

“Oh, I think you were asleep when Dr. Parker visited yesterday. But he said that your bone marrow is finally showing signs of engraftment. You’re getting better, Jess”, Luke said with a proud smile on his face.

Jess raised an eyebrow, a hint of skepticism in his eyes. “Really?”

“Yeah. Obviously, he said that we still have to take it easy and you’re not out of the woods yet, but it’s a positive sign.”

Jess let the news sink in, his mind racing. He had been through so much, the endless treatments, the constant pain and exhaustion. The idea that things might finally be turning around felt almost too good to be true. He glanced at Rory, who was watching him intently, her eyes full of encouragement.

“That’s... that’s good,” Jess finally said, his voice barely above a whisper. He didn’t know what else to say. Part of him wanted to believe it, to hope that maybe this nightmare was starting to end. But another part of him was afraid to get his hopes up, worried that it would all come crashing down again.

Rory reached out and squeezed his hand. “It is good, Jess. It’s really good. It means your body is fighting back, and it’s working,” she said, her voice warm and reassuring.

Luke nodded in agreement. “You’ve been through a lot, but you’re strong, Jess. We’re all here to help you through the rest of this.”

“Yeah”, Jess simply said. Optimism wasn’t really his strong suit, but he guessed he could give it a try. If not for himself but for his loved ones. After his breakdown last night, this felt like such good news. The desperation he had felt was so real, so deep that the good news now felt like a blessing, even though Jess wasn’t religious.

Rory's face lit up with an idea. "Hey, how about we watch a movie? It might be a good distraction," she suggested, glancing between Luke and Jess.

Jess hesitated for a moment, then nodded. "Yeah, that sounds good," he agreed.

Luke, catching Rory's eye, gave a small nod. He wasn't planning on leaving Jess's side, especially after the emotional night they had shared. "Sounds like a plan," he said, moving to adjust the small television in the room.

Rory began scrolling through the movie options on the hospital's entertainment system. "How about something light and funny?" she suggested, looking over at Jess for his input.

Jess shrugged, a small smile tugging at his lips. "Sure, whatever you want," he said, grateful for the normalcy of the moment.

They settled on a classic comedy, one of those feel-good movies that didn't require too much thinking. As the movie started, Rory sat close to Jess, their shoulders almost touching. Luke took a seat on the other side of the bed, his presence a steady and reassuring comfort.

As the movie played, the room filled with the sound of laughter and the occasional joke shared between the three of them. Jess found himself genuinely engaged for the first time in a long while, chuckling at the funny parts and enjoying the company. There was something healing about the shared laughter and the light-heartedness of the film.

Luke watched Jess closely, relieved to see him genuinely enjoying himself. He knew Jess was far from fully recovered, but moments like these felt like small victories. After the breakdown the night before, Luke had felt a renewed sense of responsibility and a deeper bond with Jess. He wasn't going to leave him alone to face this—he'd be there every step of the way.

As the credits rolled, Rory looked over at Jess, pleased to see him still awake and alert. "How was it?" she asked, a teasing tone in her voice.

Jess smiled, a rare but genuine expression. "It was good. Thanks for suggesting it," he said.

Luke stretched, feeling the tension of the previous days ease slightly. "I'm glad we did this," he said, looking at Jess with a proud smile. "You did great, kid."

For a moment, everything felt almost normal, and Jess allowed himself to relax, basking in the comfort of the moment.

As Jess dozed off after the movie, Rory and Luke found themselves in a rare quiet moment. They exchanged a glance, both silently acknowledging the weight of the situation and the uncertainty of what lay ahead. Rory shifted in her chair, wrapping her arms around herself as if trying to find some comfort in the midst of her swirling thoughts.

Luke noticed her pensive expression and leaned forward slightly. "You okay, Rory?" he asked, his voice gentle but laced with concern.

Rory sighed, glancing at Jess's sleeping form before looking back at Luke. "I don't know, Luke. I'm just... worried about leaving for college. It feels like the worst possible timing." Her voice was quiet, tinged with guilt and apprehension.

Luke nodded, understanding her worries. "I get it. It’s a lot to handle. You’re going to Yale; that’s a huge deal. But it’s also hard to leave when things are so... up in the air with Jess.”

Rory bit her lip, her eyes moistening slightly. "I know he’s getting better, but what if something happens when I’m gone? I won’t be here to help or even to just be with him. He needs all the support he can get right now, and I don’t want to be selfish, just leaving for my own life when he’s struggling so much."

Luke reached out, placing a reassuring hand on her arm. "Rory, you’re not being selfish. You’ve been amazing—being here for him, taking care of him. But you have to live your life too. Jess would want you to go to Yale, to follow your dreams. He’s proud of you, even if he doesn't always say it."

Rory looked down, wiping away a tear that had escaped. "I just feel so torn. I love him, Luke. He's my best friend, and I hate the thought of not being here for him. Especially now."

Luke squeezed her arm gently. "I know it’s hard. But Jess is strong, and so are you. He’s going to be okay, and he’ll have a whole team of people supporting him here, including me. We’ll keep you updated on everything, and you can always visit when you can. And who knows, maybe some time apart will be good for both of you—to grow and figure things out."

Rory nodded, appreciating Luke's steady presence and the comfort he provided. "I know you're right. It's just... scary. The future, and everything."

Luke smiled softly. "The future is always scary. But you’re going to do great things, Rory. And Jess will be cheering you on, even if it’s from a distance. We all will be."

Rory smiled back, feeling a bit lighter. "Thanks, Luke. I guess I just needed to hear that."

"Anytime," Luke said warmly. "We’re all in this together. And hey, Jess is stubborn. He’ll fight through this and be fine. And if he gets too annoying, you know where to find me."

Rory chuckled softly at that, grateful for Luke's support and humor. As they sat together in the quiet room, the weight of their worries seemed to lift, if only slightly, giving them a moment of peace and hope for the future.

A few hours passed. Rory and Luke watched another movie on low volume while Jess napped. He woke up just as the credits rolled.

“Hey, sleepyhead. You have the craziest bed hair I’ve ever seen”, Rory said affectionately and tried to smooth out Jess’s hair that was sticking in every possible direction.

“It’s because he tosses around so much”, Luke chuckled.

“Yeah, bully the cancer kid. Real classy.”

Rory grinned, unfazed by Jess's sarcasm. "Hey, I’m just saying, if there’s a bed hair competition, you’d definitely win. And I say that with all the love in the world."

Jess rolled his eyes playfully. "Great, my life's ambition is finally fulfilled. Winning the prestigious 'Best Bed Hair' award."

Luke smirked, leaning back in his chair. "Well, it’s good to have goals, right? And hey, at least your hair is getting the attention it deserves. We should get you a trophy or something."

Jess snorted, shaking his head. "Yeah, maybe something gold-plated with 'Master of Messy Hair' engraved on it. Put it on the mantelpiece next to my participation trophies from gym class."

Rory laughed, nudging Jess lightly. "Don’t worry, we’ll make sure the trophy’s really shiny so it matches your sparkling personality."

"Oh, the sass," Jess retorted with a mock sigh, though he couldn’t hide the smile tugging at his lips. "I’m surrounded by comedians. I should start charging for my audience."

Luke joined in the banter, his voice filled with mock seriousness. "Well, if we’re talking fees, you owe us for the entertainment value. Keeping you company during all these movies has been a full-time job, you know."

Rory nodded in agreement, pretending to count on her fingers. "Let’s see, we’ve watched... how many movies now? At this rate, Jess, you’ll be in debt to us for life."

Jess raised an eyebrow, playing along. "Guess I’ll have to pay you back in snarky comments and eye rolls. It’s all I can afford right now."

"Deal," Rory said, grinning. "Though, you might have to throw in a few genuine smiles here and there. They’re rare, but I know they exist."

Jess chuckled softly, shaking his head. "I guess I can manage that. But don’t push your luck."

Luke smiled warmly, feeling the lightness of the moment. "We wouldn’t dream of it. Besides, your smile is worth more than any trophy or movie night. So, consider us paid in full."

They all shared a quiet laugh, the room filled with a comforting sense of camaraderie. Despite the circumstances, the jokes and gentle teasing provided a much-needed reprieve from the weight of their worries. For a moment, they could just be together, enjoying each other's company and the ease of familiar banter.

Dr. Parker entered the room, a reassuring smile on his face. The light atmosphere from their earlier conversation carried over, making the room feel a bit brighter despite the sterile hospital environment. "Good evening, everyone," he greeted cheerfully, nodding to Rory, Luke, and Jess. "How’s everyone doing?”

“We’re good. We were just thinking about giving Jess an award for ‘best bed hair’. Would you agree with that?”, Rory asked jokingly.

“Well, I definitely agree he has the best bed hair in the cancer ward, considering, he’s the only patient who has hair”, Dr. Parker chuckled.

Jess smirked, sitting up a bit straighter. "You know, a win is a win. And I’ll take it.”

Dr. Parker smiled, setting down his clipboard on the counter. "Well, I've got some good news that might top even the bed hair awards," he said, his tone turning a bit more serious but still warm. "Your latest blood work looks promising, Jess. Your counts are steadily improving, and that's a great sign. It means the new bone marrow is starting to do its job."

Rory and Luke exchanged relieved glances, their smiles reflecting a mix of hope and happiness. "That's fantastic," Rory said, her voice filled with genuine excitement. "See, Jess? Things are looking up."

Dr. Parker moved closer to the bed, gesturing for Jess to lift his shirt slightly so he could listen to his heart and lungs. Jess obliged, rolling his eyes with a mock groan. "Great, more poking and prodding."

The doctor laughed softly as he placed the cold stethoscope against Jess's chest. "Sorry about that. It's the price of being such a star patient. Deep breath in for me, Jess."

Jess complied, taking a deep breath. The room was quiet except for the soft sounds of Jess breathing and the beeping of the monitors. Dr. Parker moved the stethoscope to different spots on Jess's chest and back, listening intently. He nodded to himself, seemingly satisfied with what he heard. "Lungs sound clear," he murmured, then placed the stethoscope over Jess's heart. "Just one more thing—deep breath and hold it."

Jess followed the instruction, holding his breath as Dr. Parker listened to the rhythm of his heart. After a few moments, Dr. Parker straightened up, pulling the stethoscope away. "Everything sounds good, Jess. Your heart's doing well, which is exactly what we want to hear."

Jess exhaled, a bit of the tension leaving his shoulders. "Well, that's a relief. Not that I was worried or anything," he added with a small, sarcastic grin.

Dr. Parker smiled back, appreciating the boy's spirit. "Of course not. But it's always good to get confirmation. And besides, it's not every day I get to give good news in such a light-hearted room. You guys have quite the support team here," he said, glancing at Rory and Luke.

Luke leaned back in his chair, his face relaxed but still filled with concern. "We try. It's all about keeping things as normal as possible, right? Even if 'normal' means joking about bed hair."

"Absolutely," Dr. Parker agreed, his expression softening. "Laughter is great medicine. And from what I can see, you're in good hands, Jess."

Jess nodded, looking a little more at ease. "Thanks, Doc. I'll keep working on my stand-up routine for your next visit."

Dr. Parker chuckled, giving Jess a pat on the shoulder. "I'll look forward to it. Keep up the good work, all of you. We're getting there, one day at a time."

Chapter Text

One thing that Jess didn’t anticipate was for Liz to show up. He thought he was hallucinating when he saw her walking through the door but Luke’s and Rory’s reactions confirmed her really be there instead of a mirage.

“Liz, what are you doing here?” Luke asked with confusion. He was too surprised to even be angry, at least just yet.

Liz looked around the room. Jess was lying on the bed, looking tired and Rory was sitting on the chair beside him, holding his hand. Luke was by the window but he walked over to her. “I wanted to come see my boy”, she simply said, as if it was as obvious as ever.

She turned to face Jess and approached his bed. “My baby”, she whispered, cupping his face with her hands. Jess flinched at her touch, instinctively trying to pull away. The awkwardness and discomfort in the room were palpable. Rory watched with cautious eyes, her grip on Jess's hand steady, providing silent support. Luke stood back, arms crossed, his face a mask of restrained emotion.

“You look well”, she said as he stared at his face. Jess stared back at her. Her face had more wrinkles than the last time he had studied her. “And who is this lovely young lady?” she asked, turning her attention to Rory.

“She’s Rory, my girlfriend”, Jess spoke, avoiding eye contact now.

Liz’s eyes twinkled. “Aww girlfriend. How cute. You two look darling together. You’d make such pretty babies too”, Liz said with a wink.

Jess and Rory both cringed at her words.

“Okayyy. No babies any time soon”, Luke interrupted. He had been eyeing Jess, trying to study his emotions. The boy looked uncomfortable with his mother’s presence and her babbling.

Liz seemed oblivious to the awkwardness her words had caused, or perhaps she was too nervous to notice. She continued to smile, trying to fill the heavy silence with more small talk. "So, Rory, how did you two meet?" she asked, her voice overly cheerful.

Rory exchanged a quick glance with Jess, sensing his discomfort. "We just saw each other around town. My mother is obsessed with Luke’s diner so," she replied simply, trying to keep the conversation light. She could feel Jess's tension beside her, and she gently squeezed his hand, hoping to provide some comfort.

Liz nodded, looking between them. "Well, it's wonderful to see Jess with someone who cares about him," she said, her tone softening. She hesitated, her gaze flickering to Luke as if seeking some sort of approval or support.

“You know, Rob and I have been together for four months now and I think he’s gonna propose soon”, she declared with a grin. Jess tried not to roll his eyes. He had been forced to attend one too many weddings of his mom’s in his life. At least now she held no power over him in that matter.

Liz’s gaze fell back to Rory. “Jess was always my little flower boy in my earlier weddings. He’d wear this cute little suit and hold the rings on a pillow. He was just the cutest thing.”

Rory didn’t quite know how to feel about Liz. She seemed harmless, just kind of silly and oblivious. But she knew what Liz had done to Jess when he was younger. All the abandoning and bringing dangerous people around him outshadowed the silly act she was putting on now. But on the other hand, Rory didn’t completely hate hearing stories about Jess from his mother and she found herself giggling at the image of little Jess carrying rings for Liz.

“Yeah well, your husbands would threaten to beat me in front of all of the five guests that you had if I dropped the rings”, Jess muttered, breaking the jolly image in Rory’s mind. Now she only thought of the terrified little boy.

Liz grimaced, clearly not wanting to remember the details described by Jess. “Big brother, how’s the diner doing?” she changed the subject.

“It’s fine, still there even though I’m not. Ceasar has been holding the place up while I’ve been here with Jess a lot”, Luke spoke. Liz took this as an attack.

“What’s that supposed to mean? Are you hinting that I haven’t been here for my son?” she snapped.

“What? No.” Or maybe he was, but he’d never tell Liz. She was a master at twisting people’s words and misunderstanding things on purpose.

“I’ve been trying my best you know. It wasn’t easy trying to get away from everything to come here. But I wanted to come to support my baby.”

“Stop calling me baby”, Jess mumbled.

“It’s… good that you’re here now”, Luke hesitated on the good part. “But Jess has been in the hospital for months. He could’ve used your support a lot sooner”, he continued.

 "I know... I know I've missed a lot," she said, her voice faltering slightly. "I’ve just had a lot going on. But I’m here now and I want to continue being here.”

Jess remained silent, his eyes downcast. He didn't know how to process Liz's sudden interest in his life, and the way she tried to gloss over the past made him uneasy. He hadn’t forgotten about her empty promises from last Christmas, swearing she would be there for him now only to leave the following day. He could feel Rory's steady presence beside him, and Luke's protective stance at the foot of the bed.

Luke cleared his throat, stepping forward slightly. "Liz, Jess has been through a lot," he said, his voice firm but not unkind. "And he's got a long road ahead of him. If you're here to support him, that's great. But you need to understand that this isn't easy for him. It won’t be all flowers and butterflies and you won’t get to just cherry-pick the good parts.”

Liz's face fell slightly, her expression turning more serious. "I know, Luke," she admitted, her voice quiet. "I know I've messed up. I just... I want to try and make it right, if I can."

Jess finally looked up, meeting her eyes. He felt a swirl of emotions—anger, sadness, confusion—but there was also a small, hesitant part of him that wanted to believe she was sincere. Guess he was just as naïve as she was when it came to shitty men. "We'll see," he said, his voice flat but with a hint of resignation.

Liz nodded, and smiled at her son. Jess could see wetness in her eyes. She reached out to touch his hand, but stopped herself, pulling back as if afraid to push too hard. "I understand," she whispered. "I'll give you time."

That was unusual for her. Usually, she pushed and pushed until the other person was at their breaking point. So that gave Jess some hope that she would be serious about this. It wouldn’t be too much to ask for a mother who showed she cared about him, right?

The room fell into an uneasy silence. Rory, sensing the tension, decided to try and lighten the mood. "So, Liz, are you staying around for a while?" she asked, her tone casual.

Liz seemed grateful for the change in subject. "Yes, I thought I'd stay in town for a bit," she said, a small smile returning to her face. "If that's okay with everyone."

Luke gave a slight nod, though his expression remained cautious. "That's fine," he said. "Just... take it slow, okay?"

Liz nodded, glancing back at Jess. "Of course," she agreed. "I'll take it one step at a time. I’ll be back later."

As she left the room, the tension lifted slightly, though the air was still thick with unspoken emotions. Jess leaned back against his pillows, looking exhausted but also somewhat relieved. Rory leaned over, kissing his cheek softly. "You okay?" she whispered.

Jess nodded, though his eyes were clouded with thought. "Yeah," he muttered. "Just... tired."

Luke sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "That was... something," he said, trying to sound casual but clearly concerned.

Rory and Jess both gave him a small smile, though it was strained. "Yeah, something," Jess echoed, his voice barely above a whisper. He closed his eyes, leaning into Rory's touch, trying to find some semblance of peace in the chaos.

Rory kept stroking Jess’s hair, trying to ease his stress. “Can I sleep with you tonight?” she asked with a small smile. Jess opened his eyes to meet hers.

“Of course.”

Rory climbed on the bed and the young couple got comfortable. Luke said he’d leave for a while to grab some food and stretch his legs.

As Jess and Rory lay together, the room quiet except for the faint hum of hospital equipment, Jess felt a mix of emotions swirling inside him. Liz's sudden appearance had thrown him off balance. He hadn't expected to see her, and now that she was here, he wasn't sure how to feel.

Rory noticed the tension in Jess's posture and continued to stroke his hair gently, offering silent support. "You okay?" she asked softly, her voice barely above a whisper.

Jess sighed, staring up at the ceiling. "I don't know," he admitted. "It's just... weird, you know? Seeing her after all this time."

Rory nodded, her hand still moving soothingly through his hair. "Yeah, I can imagine. It must be confusing."

Jess turned to look at her, his eyes filled with uncertainty. "It's like... part of me wants to give her a chance, but another part is just... angry. She wasn't there when I needed her. Not when I was a kid, and not when I got sick. Why now?"

Rory took his hand in hers, squeezing it gently. "It's okay to feel that way, Jess. You're allowed to be upset. But maybe she's trying to make up for it, in her own way. It's not easy, but... maybe it's worth giving her a chance to explain herself."

Jess nodded slowly, though his expression remained troubled. "Yeah, maybe," he said, his voice soft. "I guess I just don't know if I can trust her. Or if I even want to."

Rory leaned in, resting her forehead against his. "Whatever you decide, I'm here for you," she murmured. "You don't have to figure it all out right now. Just take it one day at a time."

Jess felt a surge of gratitude for Rory's steady presence in his life. She always knew how to calm him down and make him feel safe. He kissed her forehead, closing his eyes as he took in the moment. "Thanks, Rory," he whispered. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

Rory smiled, her heart warming at his words. "You're stuck with me, sorry to say," she teased lightly, trying to lift the mood a bit. "Now, how about we get some rest? We've had enough drama for one day."

Jess chuckled softly, nodding. "Yeah, rest sounds good."

Rory nudged her face into Jess’s neck. She pecked him there, which sent a shiver down his spine. “I’ll always be here”, she whispered. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close, and slowly drifted off to sleep, comforted by the warmth and support of the person he loved.

Luke stepped out into the cool evening air, taking a deep breath to steady himself. The hospital's fluorescent lights cast long shadows across the parking lot, giving the scene an eerie, surreal quality. As he walked, his eyes caught sight of Liz's car, still parked under one of the dim lights. She was sitting inside, her figure silhouetted against the dashboard lights. He hesitated for a moment, then approached the vehicle, his footsteps echoing softly in the quiet night.

Liz noticed him and rolled down her window, the faint hum of the electric motor breaking the silence. Her eyes were downcast, and the weariness in her expression spoke volumes. "He doesn’t want me there, does he?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper, tinged with a sorrow that cut through the stillness.

Luke sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked at her. The anger he felt towards her for her past actions simmered beneath the surface, but seeing her so vulnerable, so unlike the Liz he remembered, made it hard to hold onto that anger. "It’s just weird for him," he said, trying to find the right words. "He needs time to adjust."

Liz nodded slowly, her fingers tapping nervously on the steering wheel. "He looked so grown up. He’s not my little boy anymore." Her voice cracked slightly, and she swallowed hard, fighting back tears.

Luke leaned against the car door, crossing his arms. "He’s still a kid in many ways," he offered, trying to soften the conversation. "You know he refuses to eat waffles any other way except with whipped cream and jam? And I’ve caught him watching cartoons sometimes when he thought he was alone." He chuckled lightly, trying to lighten the mood.

A faint smile tugged at Liz's lips. "I always told him not to watch those 'cause they rot your brain," she said, her tone a mix of fondness and regret. "But he always loved those childish things. Just like he loved those lame magic tricks."

Luke smiled, a small, sad smile. "He’s pretty good at them, though. The other day, he showed some tricks to us. And it gives him something to do while he’s stuck in that tiny room."

"How’s he been? Healthwise, I mean."

Luke’s face clouded over with concern. "It’s been rough on him. He’s been really ill, but the doctors are saying he’s starting to get better now. But it’s still a long road ahead."

"And how about this Rory girl? Is she any good?" Liz asked, trying to steer the conversation towards lighter topics.

Luke looked up, meeting her eyes. "Yeah, she’s a great girl. You should see those two together. She’s really been there for him." He smiled genuinely, a hint of pride in his voice.

Liz sighed, a long, heavy sigh that seemed to carry years of regret and guilt. "Good, that’s good. Jess deserves to feel loved."

Luke’s expression hardened slightly, a flicker of anger returning. "Did Jess not deserve to feel loved when he was a kid?" he asked, his voice low but firm. "You know, I was almost starting to forget about the things he told me. The drugs, the abuse, and the abandoning—it doesn’t really sound like love to me."

Liz winced as if his words were physical blows. "Luke, let’s not go there," she pleaded, her voice shaky.

Luke shook his head, his gaze piercing. "You can’t just continue brushing it under the rug," he insisted. "He deserves an apology, even though it can never undo the damage that your careless actions have done to him."

Liz’s eyes filled with tears, and she looked away, unable to meet his gaze. "I know," she whispered, her voice breaking. "I know I can never make up for what I did. But I want to try, Luke. I really do."

Luke crossed his arms, leaning against the side of the car. His tone was firm. "Then make it right, Liz. He needs to hear it from you, not from me or anyone else."

Liz swallowed hard, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. "Do you really think he wants to hear anything from me? I’m the last person he needs."

Luke softened, his voice dropping a notch. "He might not realize it now, but he needs closure. He's been carrying around a lot of pain. He deserves to hear you say it, to know that you understand what you did and that you're sorry."

Liz sniffed, wiping at her eyes. "I’ve been trying to think of what to say to him, but every time I open my mouth, it just sounds hollow. How do I make up for lost time? For everything?"

Luke sighed, running a hand through his hair. "You can't make up for it all at once, Liz. It's about showing up now and being honest. Tell him you're sorry, and tell him you're here for him, whatever he needs."

Liz nodded slowly, her voice barely a whisper. "I'll try, Luke. I really will. For him."

There was a long silence between them, the weight of the conversation hanging in the air. Luke pushed off from the car, his expression softening. "Take it one step at a time. Just be real with him. That's all he needs right now."

Liz looked up at him, a small, sad smile on her face. "Thanks, Luke. For everything. I know I don't deserve your kindness, but... thank you."

Luke gave a short nod, his tone gruff but not unkind. "Just do right by Jess. That's all that matters." With that, he turned and walked away, leaving Liz to gather her thoughts.

When he returned to Jess’s hospital room, he found Jess asleep and Rory petting his hair gently, laying by his side. She could still feel the stress radiating from him even in his sleep, so she tried to calm him down. At least now he seemed to be peaceful.

“So that was Liz huh?”  she asked, her eyes travelling from Jess to Luke.

Luke sat down on the chair with a sigh. “The one and only.”

“I always imagined her to look different. Less hippy.”

“Yeah well, that’s a new phase I believe”, Luke said. “She had them all growing up, from emo to preppy.”

Rory chuckled at the thought. “How was she like, as a sister?” she asked after a while. Based on what Jess had told her, she didn’t feel all too warm and fuzzy about the woman. In a way, she just wanted to understand. Having a fairly absent father herself, she if anyone knew that parental relationships could be hard and disappointing. But she had experienced the, let down, not-showing-up-to-your-birthday-disappointed, not the being left alone for days without food or comfort disappointed. And her heart just broke looking at the sleeping boy, imagining everything he had been forced to experience. He had only started to open up about it lately and she knew there was still so much he hadn’t told her. She honestly wasn’t sure she even wanted to know the worst of it.

Luke was silent for a moment. “She was… wild. Independent. Never took anyone’s advice on anything. She was the princess, my dad adored her until, you know, she got pregnant.”

“That sounds a lot like mom”, Rory noted.

“Yeah, I guess they have some similarities. But Lorelai made the right decisions. For Liz, those were far and between.”

“She decided to keep Jess. That must’ve been good.”

Luke looked at his nephew. So much suffering endured. But there must’ve been some good moments there too, right? It wasn’t fair on the boy to be brought up in such terrible conditions. But maybe he had done the most he could with what he was given. Luke would never admit it, but sometimes he wondered how different Liz’s life would’ve been if she never had Jess, never got pregnant. Their dad never would’ve kicked her out and she could’ve finished high school. She was always a free spirit but maybe she would’ve stayed in Stars Hollow until she was a bit older, bit more mature. She could’ve avoided the bad crowd. Stayed sober. Not gotten into a habit of dating shitty men. She could’ve turned out decent

But there was no way he’d ever admit that all to anyone, especially not Rory. Because none of it was Jess’s fault and he didn’t want to make her feel like it was, especially not when she was the baby of a teenage mom as well. “Yeah, that was good”, he simply said instead.

“I’m glad Jess exists”, she said while looking at Jess adoringly. She kissed his temple gently and a faint smile appeared on the sleeping boy’s mouth.

“Me too.” He really was. Jess was a great kid. So much like Luke that he barely noticed it himself. Jess was a little smart-ass, but he had made Luke’s dull life so much more eventful and while it wasn’t always a good thing, it was something. Jess was like his son, and even though he didn’t carry the same last name, he was proof that the Danes genes would always override whatever other genes were thrown in the mix. Jimmy had always been a loser but at least Liz had had potential. And Jess got all of that potential and more.

Luke wasn’t happy about how Jess came to life, but he was glad that the boy did, no matter the circumstances. The boy had given him a sense of purpose and a kind of love he hadn’t known he was capable of. Luke loved him for who he was, rough edges and all. He couldn’t imagine dealing with a nephew who was some snob, a country club type who played tennis and golf and yelled at maids. No, Jess was real. He was grounded, witty, and had a heart, even if he tried to hide it under layers of sarcasm and indifference.

Chapter Text

Jess was used to fixing things, much like Luke. As a kid, he wanted to fix everything as much as possible. He felt responsible for other people’s feelings, and he tried to please everyone. Jess hated the thought that someone would be angry or disappointed with him. He wanted to help Liz around as much as possible but oftentimes, she wouldn’t even notice. Jess would try to keep the apartment clean to the best of his abilities and as he got older, he attempted to cook them dinner. Liz was usually too drunk to even care about the cleanliness of the home she raised her son in, and the drugs decreased her appetite to almost a nonexistent level, so she forgot other people, like I don’t know, maybe her minor son would need food to survive.

But Jess did it all, because he was convinced that if he was good and helped his mom and did everything right, she would love him. He thought that he could buy her love but only if he never made a single mistake. If he was always good and never whined or argued or cried, she would finally love him.

At school, being liked by authority figures was especially important to young Jess. Later on, he learned to despise them, but as a little boy, he just wanted to be liked. He just wanted the attention he never got at home. He’d stay back after class, hoping that the teachers would make small talk with him because he was too shy to initiate conversation on his own. He also had trouble fitting in with the other kids, despite always attending the lowest funded schools where most of the students were from poor families, like him.

Jess learned early on that he couldn’t rely on Liz for much, so he turned inward, channeling his energy into being a model student and trying to make the best of his situation. He was quiet and diligent, always the first to volunteer for tasks in class, whether it was helping to clean up or organizing bookshelves. Jess hoped that if he could just do enough, be enough, someone would notice him and acknowledge his efforts.

In his third-grade year, Jess had a teacher named Mrs. Daniels who seemed different from the others. She was young, enthusiastic, and had a reputation for being a favorite among students. Jess admired her; she was everything he wished his own life could be—organized, kind, and attentive. He quickly decided that Mrs. Daniels was the person whose approval he needed the most. He stayed late after school, helping her clean the classroom, hoping to catch a few moments of her time and maybe, just maybe, become her favorite student.

Mrs. Daniels, noticing Jess's eagerness, initially seemed appreciative. She would smile at him and thank him for his help, and once even gave him a gold star for his good behavior, which he cherished. It was the first time Jess felt truly seen by an adult, and he latched onto that feeling, desperate for more.

However, as time went on, Jess began to notice a shift in Mrs. Daniels’ behavior. She became less warm, more distant. One day, Jess stayed late to help clean up after an art project. As he carefully placed the brushes back into their jars, he overheard Mrs. Daniels talking to another teacher in the hallway.

“He's always hanging around after class. It’s a bit much, don’t you think? Almost like he has nowhere else to go,” she said with a hint of annoyance in her voice.

The other teacher laughed lightly, “Poor kid. Maybe he doesn’t. You know how some of these kids are.”

Mrs. Daniels sighed. “I know, but it's just... he’s always there. It’s starting to feel like he’s just desperate for attention. It’s not like he’s my only student. I can't be everything for every kid.”

The words stung Jess like a slap to the face. He felt his cheeks burn with shame and embarrassment. He had been trying so hard to be helpful, to be noticed, and here was Mrs. Daniels, the person he admired most, dismissing him as a nuisance. He felt foolish for ever believing that someone could truly care about him just for being himself.

After that day, Jess stopped staying late after school. He stopped trying to be the teacher’s pet, stopped volunteering for extra tasks. A cold, hard realization settled over him: no matter how hard he tried, no matter what he did, he would never be enough to make people truly care about him. He began to distance himself from everyone, erecting walls around his heart that would eventually become impenetrable.

At home, he stopped cleaning up after Liz, stopped trying to cook meals that she would never eat. He did his own thing, coming and going as he pleased, without bothering to leave notes or explanations. If Liz noticed or cared, she never showed it. She was too caught up in her own world, too lost in the haze of her addictions to notice the quiet boy who had once tried so hard to please her.

At school, Jess became known as the quiet, sullen kid who didn’t talk much. He stopped trying to make friends, stopped caring about his grades. When teachers called on him in class, he answered in monosyllables or not at all. He became invisible, just another face in the crowd, and he liked it that way. It was easier to be overlooked, to blend into the background, than to risk the sting of rejection again. but inside, he was still the same scared, lonely boy who just wanted to be loved, but he buried that part of himself deep, so deep that even he had trouble finding it sometimes.

Jess learned to navigate life with a chip on his shoulder, keeping everyone at arm’s length. He didn’t need anyone’s approval anymore because he had learned the hard way that it wasn’t worth the effort. People would always let him down, always see him as less than he was. And so, he stopped trying to be anything other than what he was—a survivor, hardened by a world that had never shown him much kindness.

And yet, despite everything, a small part of him still yearned for the approval and love he had never received. But he buried that part of himself, too, because the pain of wanting something he could never have was too much to bear. It was easier to pretend he didn’t care, easier to play the role of the indifferent, apathetic teenager. It was safer to build walls and keep people out, rather than risk being hurt again.

In the end, Jess’s transformation from a people-pleaser to someone who didn’t care at all was complete. He became an expert at hiding his true feelings, at projecting an image of someone who was tough, unbreakable. But deep down, he was still that little boy who just wanted someone to tell him he was enough.

Jess had never really thought about his transition that deeply before therapy. Luke had suggested going to therapy, mostly because Jess kept having nightmares. He never told his uncle what they were about and Luke had simply thought that the emotional roller coaster that was cancer had left scars on Jess, haunting him in his dreams. If only it had been cancer, Jess would’ve been more than happy. Initially, he had obviously rejected the whole idea. But as he struggled to sleep through a single night without waking up in cold sweat, he knew he had to do something. And whenever they were spending the night at the Gilmores’, Jess would also end up waking up Rory, and she was starting to pressure him to go to therapy as well.

So, he ended up giving it a try. His therapist was a middle-aged man with brown eyes and hair and thick black glasses. His name was Mark, and he seemed good at what he did. At least he looked just like Jess thought a therapist would.

At first, they had really gotten nowhere. Jess would refuse to talk about anything that slightly related to his childhood or Liz or his father or his relationships with Luke or Rory or even his cancer journey. Basically, they would argue about books and music and god forbid Jess let the man hear anything about why he was actually there. He felt kind of bad too because he knew Luke was paying good money for him to sit there for an hour once a week.

Sometimes, Jess would make slip ups. He’d say something that revealed more than he would’ve liked to the man. Like when Mark asked him: “what's the last book you read that really resonated with you?”

Jess hesitated for a moment, then shrugged. "I read 'The Catcher in the Rye' again. It's kind of a classic, you know?"

Mark nodded, a knowing smile on his face. "Holden Caulfield is a pretty complex character. What do you think of him?"

Jess smirked, knowing exactly where this conversation could lead but deciding to entertain it anyway. "Holden's a guy who's lost in his own world, trying to protect the innocence he thinks is worth saving. He’s got this idea that everything's phony, but at the same time, he’s kinda... desperate for someone to prove him wrong."

"Do you see yourself in Holden?" Mark asked, eyes intent on Jess, as if trying to peel back layers.

Jess rolled his eyes, a typical defense mechanism, but he didn't completely dismiss the question. "Maybe. I get the whole 'phony' thing. It's like you spend so much time trying to be what other people want you to be, and you end up feeling... lost. Holden's got a point about the world being full of crap. People put on these faces, act like they've got it all together, but inside, they're just as messed up as anyone else."

Mark leaned forward slightly. "Do you feel like you're putting on a face?"

Jess snorted, trying to maintain his indifferent facade. "Everyone does. It's like that story 'Great Expectations.' Pip's got this idea of what he should be, all because he thinks that'll make people like him more. Turns out, people just want to use him. It’s like, the more you try to fit into someone else’s expectations, the less you actually know about yourself."

Mark nodded thoughtfully, jotting down a note. "And what about you? Whose expectations are you trying to live up to?"

Jess shifted uncomfortably, suddenly feeling exposed. He hadn’t meant to reveal so much, but now he was on the spot. "I don’t know," he muttered. "Maybe my mom's, or my dad's, or... maybe I'm just trying to prove I’m not a waste of space. My mom, she’s... well, she’s a mess. Never really been around, you know? And my dad, he just... took off. Didn’t stick around to see how his son would turn out. I guess... sometimes it feels like I’m trying to show them that they were wrong about me."

Mark looked at Jess with a kind of understanding that made Jess uncomfortable, like he was seeing right through the bravado. "That sounds like a lot of weight to carry," he said gently. "Do you think you’ve been able to let go of any of that pressure?"

Jess shrugged again, his go-to move when he felt cornered. "I don’t know. I used to care a lot more about what people thought. But then, I realized it doesn’t matter. People leave, they disappoint you. Like, I read 'Junk' by Melvin Burgess, and it's all about these kids who get into drugs and mess up their lives. It’s pretty messed up, but it’s real. People mess up, and sometimes they don’t come back from it. I guess it just made me see that sometimes, trying to please everyone is pointless. They’re gonna do what they’re gonna do, no matter what you do."

Mark leaned back, processing everything Jess had said. "It sounds like you’ve had to grow up pretty fast, dealing with things no kid should have to."

Jess looked away, suddenly fascinated by a spot on the floor. "Yeah, well... that’s life, right? You get dealt a hand, and you either play it or you fold. I’m still here, so I guess I’m playing it."

Mark smiled gently. "You are, and you're doing a good job of it, Jess. But remember, it’s okay to ask for help. You don’t have to carry all of this on your own."

Jess didn’t respond, but something about Mark’s words resonated with him. For once, he felt like maybe he wasn’t just sitting in that office wasting time. Maybe, just maybe, there was a way to unpack all the baggage he’d been carrying for so long. But for now, he wasn’t ready to dive into the deep end. He'd stick to discussing books and hiding his truths between the lines, just as he had always done.

But he got more comfortable with Mark’s presence and each time, Jess felt like he was making more progress. However, now Jess hadn’t gone to Mark’s office in ages due to, you know, him being stuck in the hospital. So, it was safe to say that one afternoon when Jess was chilling alone in his room, he was quite surprised to see his therapist enter the room.

“Good day Jess. We haven’t seen in a while”, the man greeted him.

Jess closed his book and sat up straighter on the bed. “Uhm hi. I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

“Your uncle and I talked. I suggested that I could visit you here since you’re unable to come to my office. We both thought it would be good for you to have our sessions.”

Of course, Luke thought so. But to be honest, Jess kind of thought so too. Therapy had given him tools to deal with difficult things he was going through, and it had definitely helped in his relationship with Rory too.

“Ah, sure I guess. I didn’t know you did house visits.”

“I do occasionally, when there is a need”, Mark said, settling down on the chair next to his bed. He had a notepad and a pen in his hand. “So, we haven’t seen in a while. What’s been happening?”

Jess sighed, not even knowing where to start. “Well, I relapsed, as you can tell from the setting of our meeting. I was really scared at first and coming back here brought a lot of bad memories from the first time around. I called Liz and basically begged her to come visit but she was a dick about it. She actually did come just a few days ago and she promised to stay but I don’t know about that. I also called Jimmy, my dad and that was a can of worms I could’ve kept shut, in retrospect. Then, I told Rory stuff about my childhood and Luke found out as well through Lorelai, which I should’ve expected. But I wasn’t really ready for him to know yet”, Jess listed.

Mark was desperately behind as he was trying to jot down notes about everything Jess was saying. God, there was a lot to unpack here. This would take multiple sessions to comb through. “That sounds like a lot of things have happened. Why don’t we focus on one thing at a time, to make this simpler? If we go back to the start, to your cancer relapsing. Why do you think fear was the most prominent of your feelings? Is it still?”

Jess crossed his legs on the bed. “I was afraid because I knew what was to come. Funnily enough, I was afraid the first time because I didn’t know what was to come. I guess cancer is scary either way. I was afraid of all the pain that the treatment would bring. The fear was justified though. It’s been terrible but I guess I’m not that afraid anymore.”

“How do you feel about your cancer diagnosis now?”

“I don’t know. I just want it to be over. Frustrated maybe?” Jess said it more like a question than a statement and he watched as Mark’s hand was scribbling more notes.

“Have you had support?”

“Yeah, from Rory and Luke mostly. And Lorelai. They’re here all the time, which makes me kind of guilty.”

“Why does it make you guilty?”

“Because they’re here, spending their precious time with me when they have more important things to do. Luke owns a diner and he’s barely had time to work there at all. Rory’s going off to college soon and she should be enjoying her last weeks at home but instead, she’s always here. And Lorelai has an inn to run and a daughter who she is so attached to they basically share the same thoughts and soon she’ll move away and they won’t see each other much anymore. I don’t deserve to be taking all of their time away.”

“Why do you think that you don’t deserve support, Jess?”

God damn, might just as well ask why he hates himself. Jess hesitated. “I’m just not used to people being there for me.”

“So, you mentioned that you called your father and mother and she ended up coming here. Did you feel like they were trying to give you their support?”

“No.”

“Why’s that?”

“Jimmy knows nothing about me. He didn’t know I had cancer and he barely remembered how old I was. He’s tried to wipe me off his memory. And Liz, I don’t think she came on her own accord.”

“Do you think someone forced her to come?”

“Oh please, no one can force Liz to do anything. But Luke probably pressured her to come. I bet he had to break the radio silence after he learned that she was a way shittier parent than he thought.”

“And by shittier, you mean the stuff we’ve been discussing?”

“Yeah, you know the deal. Drugs, ignoring my existence, letting bad people into our home. The usual.”

“And Luke didn’t know about any of it?”

“Maybe deep down he did. I mean he would’ve had to be extremely naïve to ignore all the signs. But he always wanted to believe good things about Liz, so I think he just convinced himself those things didn’t happen.”

Mark nodded, absorbing Jess's words. "It sounds like Luke is trying to reconcile the image he had of Liz with the reality you've shared. That can be challenging for anyone. How has his reaction to learning about your past affected you?"

Jess leaned back against his pillows, staring at the ceiling. "It’s weird. I think he’s more protective now, and sometimes it feels like he’s treating me like I’m made of glass. But at the same time, it’s like he’s more present, more... invested. He’s always been there for me, but now it feels different. More intense."

"Do you think his behavior is helping or making things more difficult for you?"

"A bit of both," Jess admitted. "It’s nice to have someone care so much, but it also makes me feel like I have to be careful with everything I say and do around him. Like I don’t want to add to his worries."

Mark scribbled more notes, his pen moving quickly. "It's understandable to feel that way, given everything you've been through. Let’s talk a bit more about your feelings of guilt. You mentioned that you feel guilty about taking up the time of those close to you. Why do you think you feel that way?"

Jess sighed, rubbing his face with his hands. "I guess... I’ve always felt like a burden. Like I should be able to handle things on my own and not drag others down with me. My whole life, I’ve had to be self-sufficient because there was no one else to rely on."

Mark nodded thoughtfully. "That’s a heavy burden for a child to carry. It’s no wonder you’re feeling overwhelmed now. But it's important to remember that needing help doesn’t make you weak or a burden. It makes you human."

Jess stared at Mark, absorbing his words. "I know that, logically. But it’s hard to feel it. I’ve spent so long trying to prove I can do everything on my own."

"Changing that mindset takes time," Mark acknowledged. "But you’ve already taken a big step by accepting support from Luke, Rory, and Lorelai. And by continuing therapy, even here in the hospital. That shows strength, Jess."

Jess managed a small smile. "Yeah, maybe. It’s just... hard to shake off old habits."

"Understandable. Now, about Rory going off to college—how are you coping with that?"

Jess looked down, picking at a loose thread on his blanket. "I’m happy for her. She deserves it. But it’s also scary. I don’t want to hold her back, but I’m terrified of being without her. She’s been my rock."

"Have you talked to her about these fears?"

Jess shook his head. “Not really. I don’t want to put too much pressure on her. She’s got enough on her plate."

"Communication is key," Mark said gently. "It’s okay to share your feelings with her. It’s part of what makes a relationship strong. And from what you’ve told me, Rory is someone who genuinely cares about you and wants to be there for you."

"Yeah, she is," Jess agreed, a warmth spreading through his chest at the thought of Rory’s unwavering support.

Mark smiled. "Good. Keep talking to her. And remember, you’re not alone in this. You have people who care about you deeply, and they’re here because they want to be, not because they have to be."

Jess nodded, feeling a bit lighter. "Thanks, Mark. I needed to hear that."

"You’re welcome," Mark replied, standing up and packing his things. "We’ll continue to work through this, one step at a time. You’re making progress, Jess, even if it doesn’t always feel like it."

Jess watched as Mark left the room, feeling a strange mix of exhaustion and relief. Therapy was hard work, but it was starting to pay off. He liked not feeling so angry all the time, understanding why he felt the things he did and how everything from his childhood was affecting him. It reassured him that he wasn’t this horrible person he thought he was and that the people of Stars Hollow had made him out to be at first.