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dick doesn’t understand where wally learned this kind of slang, he doesnt think he even wants to know.
it first came up during battle, punches were being landed, kicks were thrown, and snarky remarks were jabbed.
they were currently on the losing side of the fight, with their team already being down by a member, it was difficult to get this guy down. kid flash leaned back against his elbows, groaning in pain. he’d been previously thrown off to the side, as the enemy dealt with the rest of his team. he needs to stop being so reckless, dick thinks, aggravated. after a moment of weakness, then kf says, “that was not sigma, dude.” he grunts, holding the side of his rib cage.
m’gann raises an eyebrow confusedly, assuming it was an earthly slang she still hadn’t been aware of, until robin’s eyebrows furrowed in frustration. “what.” he gives the speedster a dumbfounded look. “what the hell is sigm—“ before he could get his sentence out, he jumps, dodging an attack to his knees as if he had some sort of fifth sense or something. “what the hell is sigma?”
aqualad appears by his side, positioning himself in a fighting stance. “it’s the eighteenth letter of the greek alphabet.” he shares, powering up his water-bearers. “it is also a constellation, and a mathematical sum.” he sprays the villain, and robin runs up towards them, throwing his batarangs onto their back, stunning the enemy.
they get the battle done within seconds, a breath shared between the team.
kid flash threw himself into the dirt, sprawling his arms out. “sure.” was all he could get out. he was way too tired to explain what a sigma, or a sigma male was to kaldur. he didn’t think they’d get it anyways. he laughed to himself.
artemis whined into her hands, eyes twitching in annoyance. “please, shut the hell up.” she had unfortunately been nonstop tormented by wally’s newfound slang. with each new one he discovered, became an increasing addition to his arsenal of idioms. and sadly she knew where each one originated.
“i’m just saying, you have a mighty level ten gyatt today, sweetheart.” the redhead wiggles his eyebrows flirtatiously, which almost sent the archer into a spiral.
she threw the pillow beside her, hurtling it towards wally’s stupid face. “never EVER say that to my face ever again.” she looked at him pointedly, nose scrunching. “i’ll choke you!” she spat an empty threat. she almost shoved him off of the couch when he bit the inside of his mouth and furrowed his eyebrows to give the illusion of sunken cheeks and sharp features.
something in her physically recoiled from the sight— her entire body did. her arms curled into themselves, legs dragging towards her chest. god, she wished she could dive into a pool of bleach and drown right now.
“pfft, you love me.” wally unabashedly said with a smirk. artemis’ face softened for a split second, until he opened his mouth again. “call that w rizz.” and she just couldn’t help herself anymore, like she’d been pushed off the edge, she stuffed his face into the pillow cushions, attempting to somehow suffocate him.
wally squirmed underneath her, arms flaying around crazily. his muffled cries for help could barely be heard. dick strode into the living room, walking in on the two. he went unnoticed as they wrestled each other for the pillow. “are you trying to commit first degree murder?” he finally spoke, startling artemis, freeing wally from her death grip.
“dick! my hero!” wally jumped off of the couch, tackling dick to the carpeted floor. as if on instinct, dick tussled wally, reversing their positions so that he was on top of the speedster. “oomph!”
artemis cleared her throat, crossing her arms over her chest accusingly. “he had it coming.” she defended herself.
she stared daggers down at wally, as if trying to shoot laser beams into his frontal lobe— sadly she didn’t inhabit such powers. though she could ask conner…
dick laughed, shoving wally away. “well why’d you stop?” he side-eyed the redhead, then wally’s eyes darkened in betrayal.
a mission was still yet to be assigned to the team, dick and kaldur pleaded insistently to red thunder for practically anything. still, apparently the league had everything covered for now. so, they had to the entire day all to themselves. usually, kaldur would spend free days training, working out his body to true atlantean standards.
but now, he was huddled together with the rest of his team, their bodies pressed against each other as m’gann wrapped a blanket over them. movie night!!! one of the very few times kaldur had to properly relax and enjoy a moment with his team.
“wait guys, where’re the snacks?” dick stared at the empty glass table before them.
wally jumped on his feet, “i’ll go get them!” he grinned widely. “kaldur, lend me a hand.” he ushered the atlantean.
he hugged the blanket around him tighter, already finding a comfortable spot in the warm group cuddle. disappointedly, he stood up, following behind wally toward the kitchen. m’gann calls out and says that she baked some cookies a while ago and offers to share them. dick and artemis shake their heads in protest, insisting that it wasn’t needed. but wally already started to reach for the tray, he tiptoed, fingertips barely reaching for the cookies. “uh, little help?” he shrugged awkwardly, stepping aside.
kaldur took his place, his taller stature enabling him to reach the tray with no struggle, but before he could get a proper hold of it, something— an imbalance in the air, randomly threw him off the edge, causing him to lose his footing as he stumbled onto the kitchen floor.
he blinked. once. twice. and then a cackle broke through the silence. “dude you just lost so much aura from that!” wally doubled back in laughter, “wh- what did you even trip on?!” he bit back another chorus of giggles.
he didn’t receive an answer though. only a menacing glare stared at him in return, pale green eyes piercing into his own bright green. wally coughed, bringing a hand down to pick kaldur up. the atlantean huffed, grabbing the tray of cookies as he’d intended to do.
maybe artemis should’ve choked wally when she still had the chance, because now, even m’gann started to adapt his slang. dick wallowed with her, seemingly in more pain than she was in as they watched the two converse.
“what the skibidi!” the martian exclaimed, shoulders raising in surprise. with every drop of the words: ‘skibidi,’ ‘sigma,’ ‘alpha,’ and ‘rizz’ felt like a punch to dicks and artemis’ guts. the archer was crawling for mercy, nails scratching against the kitchen counter, silently begging them to stop. the boy wonder beside her hung his head in agony below the counter, hands balled into a tense fist.
artemis wheezed, “make it stop.” she squeaked out, voice straining. dick raised his head to turn to her, a look of shame on his face, whether it was for himself, m’gann, or for wally, she couldn’t tell. from across the kitchen island, wally continues to spill the current drama happening at his school, equipped with dramatic gestures and animated expressions.
he sprawled his hands out, wrapping up the exciting parts of his story, they supposed. “so yeah, can we get an F in the chat, please?” wally looked down solemnly, his mouth quivering, obviously biting back a roaring laugh.
m’gann nods along with him, “F.”