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Rodney’s first hint that something was going on was at breakfast when the two people in front of him in line were talking about English as the official language.
“It’s a tactic to disable immigrants even further,” said Dr. Moore.
“But by forcing them to learn English, they will better integrate into society,” countered Dr. Phelps. “It’s not that big a deal.”
Rodney rolled his eyes at the two of them. “It’s a stupid idea since the stargate takes care of most translation problems anyway,” he snapped at the two of them. “The line’s moving.”
Instead of closing the meter gap ahead of them, Moore and Phelps blinked stupidly at Rodney until Moore said, “Right, he’s Canadian.” Rodney failed to see how that had anything to do with it, but since they were moving and reconstituted eggs were before him, he really didn’t care.
He didn’t think anything more about it, in fact, even when he came across Simpson trying to explain rotating terms in the US Senate to Frumpsky, or whatever his name was from Russia. “Please tell me you’re not emigrating,” he snapped as he broke up the party and shooed everyone back to work.
At lunch, however, Rodney noticed something was up. Almost every table of Marines was reading while they ate. Rodney blinked twice to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating, but the sight remained the same. It freaked him out a little bit, and he wasn’t the only one. “Scary isn’t it?” said Zelenka as he passed by him and cut in line. “The fate of the free world rests in their hands.”
“What?” he asked, but Radek was already picking through the lunch offerings. A bunch of the scientists were also watching the Marines, others poured over their own work, and more than one heated discussion was going on in barely controlled voices. Rodney eyed them as he made his way to his teammates – where Sheppard was also intently reading something with a pencil in his hand while Ronon and Teyla both tried to read over his shoulder.
“Oh my God, it’s catching.” Rodney put his tray down with a clatter. “Are you all trying to get your GED, because I can tell you now that your chances of passing are slim to none.”
Sheppard looked up and said, “I’m trying to get marijuana legalized.”
“What, so when the Wraith try to eat you you’ll be happy about it?”
Sheppard looked confused, but as Rodney finished speaking there was a shout behind them. “Anyone from California know what’s up with Prop 87?”
“Yes!” at least ten people shouted back, half of them from biology and geology that were most certainly not from California. A little worried, Rodney snatched the paper Sheppard was bubble filling and blinked twice at the State of Colorado Absentee Ballot that stared back at him.
“Do you mind?” Sheppard snatched it back. “This is democracy in action here.”
“It’s election day? That’s what all this is about?” Radek’s comment suddenly made a lot more sense.
“The election’s next week, but the Daedalus is leaving tomorrow,” Sheppard explained. He flipped back to a page filled with names and local offices. “I don’t know who any of these people are.”
“Is there not a list of people on the activities bulletin board?” asked Teyla.
Rodney had seen it and thought it was someone’s idea of a joke. Politicians were listed along with every scandal related to them and what they’d done to screw the US over. A few of them had comments like “the lesser of two evils” and “fucked up personally but does his job.”
“Those people are up for Congress. These people are up for school board.”
“Don’t vote for anyone who denies evolution,” Rodney said quickly.
“It’s kind of hard when Party of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is not on the ticket,” Sheppard retorted.
“Flying Spaghetti Monster?” said Ronon. “You have a party based on food?”
“It’s a church, not a party,” Rodney told him. “And it’s made up of people who understand that religion is a crock when applied to science.”
“That’s a funny reason to have a church.”
“That’s the point.”
“Gay marriage is up again,” Sheppard broke in. “And one of the doctors said stem cell research was up in Missouri.”
“Your country will never let them pass,” Rodney snorted. “Anything that might make the world a better place is against your people’s beliefs.”
“Rodney,” Teyla frowned. “Surely that is not the case.”
“Close enough. En masse people are stupid, especially in his country where they’re all intolerant idiots more concerned with fictional morals that do nothing to improve theirs anyone else’s situation.”
Teyla looked at Sheppard for confirmation who simply shrugged. “The news Caldwell brought back says Congress might change over.”
Rodney rolled his eyes at the typically glass half full attitude. “Yes, well, Congress is not the Presidency and it’s not local government. Plus the Democrats haven’t been known for doing anything in the last ten years.”
Sheppard shrugged again. “It’s a start.” Rodney was going to argue the point but a commotion started at one of the tables of Marines. “Crap,” said Sheppard, standing with his tray. “I’ll see you guys later.” He ambled over to the trash by way of the unruly table. “Problem here?” he asked the soldiers who quieted at his approach and answered with hasty, “No, sirs.”
“Cast your votes and see that it stays that way,” said Sheppard before he moved on.
“Are elections in Canada so contentious?” asked Teyla with her eyes still on the Marines.
“Oh yes,” said Rodney before launching into a discussion of his country’s shortcomings but still maintained superiority over the US.
Talk the rest of the day continued to revolve around the elections and various ballot measures from state to state, and Rodney quickly banned it from his lab in order to get some work done without having to feel an underlying sense of outrage at the American public. He skipped dinner by accident when one of his simulations turned out some interesting results and left under protest when Sheppard dragged him off to the rec hall for movie night and leftovers.
He almost walked out again when he saw what they were watching, but Sheppard didn’t let him. “Come on, McKay, what better way to celebrate sending off the ballots?”
“By watching the Governator shoot people in an attempt to rid the Earth of human kind?”
Sheppard gave him a winsome smile full of irony. “What are our leaders for?”