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Nick crossed his arms across his chest, being careful not to knock the IV in his hand as he had already done that once already and it wasn’t fun. It had hurt, a lot.  He let out a heavy sigh.  This was not how he had imagined spending Christmas Eve.  Yes, that was right.  He could be spending Christmas Day in hospital all because his lame appendix decided to choose now of all times to become inflamed and burst inside of him. Just in time for the festivities.  Acute Appendicitis, which has very quickly developed in to peritonitis.  Whether he would be discharged or not all depended on whether his temperature went down between now (currently 10:30am) and 8pm tonight. Failure would result in him ultimately having to spending Christmas morning in hospital. He had put up a fight, tried his hardest to reason with the doctors and his mother, but it was no use.  Having being rushed in to emergency surgery early hours of Friday (the 22nd) morning after the stomachache that he had been experiencing the last couple of days became excruciating to the point of projectile vomiting in and around the toilet bowl and writhing around on the bathroom floor in agony.  Sarah had taken one look at her son before making the impromptu decision of rushing him to A&E at 3:45 in the morning. The pain her son was in, accompanied by the 40°C temperature that he had been running was a major cause of concern and she had wasted no time in wrapping Nick in a blanket, bundling him in the car and rushing him to urgent care.  

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21st December 

Nick winced slightly as he sat down at his desk in form. His stomach started hurting yesterday and he honestly thought the ache would have disappeared by now. But, it was still there, lingering. He glanced around quickly, luckily, Charlie had been distracted scrolling through cat GIFS on his phone and hadn’t seen the look of discomfort flash over his face.  He glanced over the the white board in the front of the room. Mr Lange had decorated it in colourful letters, spelling out MERRY CHRISTMAS. Which was a delightful reminder that it was the last day of term before winter break, the last day school before the new year.  

“Did you ask your mum if you could come tomorrow night?” Charlie asked if as he finally looked up from his phone screen, deciding he had seen enough skateboarding cats for one morning.  “Nick?” He asked as he noticed that his boyfriend appeared to be miles away.  “Huh?” Nick said as he snapped out of it and turned to look at the other boy.   “I asked if you’re allowed to come to Tao’s Christmas sleepover tomorrow night? You said you’d ask.”    Nick smiled at him. “Oh yeah, sorry, I forgot to tell you. Mum says that’s fine.”   Charlie grinned.  “You’ll love it. Tao’s mum always goes overboard with the Christmas snacks..” his blue eyes shining excitedly.  “Sounds amazing.” Nick grinned although the thought of over engorging himself with Christmas food like he normally did over the holidays didn’t sound as appeasing this year. It was probably the niggle in his stomach, which he just put down to trapped wind or something like that. Surely he wasn’t coming down with something, just before Christmas? 

“Are you Okay? You’re awfully quiet.” Charlie commented as they packed up their belongings after the register was taken.  “I’m fine. I just didn’t get much sleep last night.”  Nick lied through his teeth, he felt a pang of guilt. He hated lying to Charlie but, if he told him the truth that he was feeling a little iffy, he would only fuss and he didn’t want that.  “David was playing his music too loud and it kept me up.”   That was another thing. His older brother arrived home yesterday from university for the holidays.  It wasn’t bad enough that Nick wasn’t feeling great but he had to put up with his dickhead of a brother for two whole weeks as well.  The rest of the day passed by quickly, much to Nick’s delight as the niggling in his side had developed in to more of a mild stabbing pain in his abdomen.  Rugby was hell as because it was the last practice before Christmas break. Coach Singh had surprised them with a friendly match instead of their usual practice drills. She split the team in to two smaller teams. Nick loved Rugby normally, he loved the feeling of being tackled or being the tackler but not today, every time he was shoved to the ground was just a painful reminder of how crummy he was feeling. Harry Greene had to chose today of all days to elbow him in the stomach. Normally, he’d have shaken at off. He just wasn’t in the mood today. Which is why he couldn’t have been happier when 3pm rolled around and it was time to go home. He could just crawl in to bed and rest, watching Christmas movies and cuddle with Nellie and then he had the ‘Paris Squad’ festive sleepover at Tao’s house to look forward to tomorrow.  

Well that had been his plan but sadly his mother had other plans as he was dragged around the shopping centre for two hours, so that she could pick out last minute gifts before stopping by at his grandparents for dinner. So much for his chilled afternoon.  Sarah had made a few comments about her son and how he had seemed off colour and unusually quiet. Nick, of course had just brushed it off as tiredness.  Claiming that he was going to spend the Christmas break trying to get in to a better sleeping routine.  Sarah had been reluctant at first, having her own suspicions that Nicky may be coming down with something but he was adamant that he was fine and he would tell her other wise, which he did, eventually.  He just waited until he was in absolute agony. Sarah was still convinced that something wasn’t right with her son. Especially when he refused her offer of hot chocolate and a movie once they had arrived home from her parents that evening.  Nick had gone straight up to bed after a quick hug exchange and murmuring ‘goodnight, love you’ as he climbed the stairs, Nellie was quick on his heels as she could obviously also sense something wasn’t right.  Sarah busied herself the remainder of the evening finalising her Asda food delivery online, ensuring she had all the Christmas and Boxing Day essentials.  She then proceeded to wrap the last of the presents she had purchased for the boys, neatly wrapping and decorating them with a bow before placing them on top of the ever growing pile under the Christmas tree. She let Nellie out in the garden for a wee before settling down in the living room with a hot drink and love actually playing in the background. Usually this was a tradition she shared with Nicky, but he was already in bed.  

Sarah decided to head to bed around midnight but not before checking in on Nick first, he was fast asleep and Nellie was curled up asleep beside him. She smiled softly as she closed his bedroom door behind her and retreated to her own room. David was out for the night, catching up with some old school friends over a (or a few) cold pints.  He probably wouldn’t crawl in until early hours of the morning, half cut more likely. She got changed and settled down to sleep.  

Nick groaned as he rolled over in bed. He winced as a burst of pain exploded through his lower abdomen.  The mild jabbing pains from earlier in the day had intensified majorly. He’s never felt a stomachache like this. He rolled back on to his back as a whimper escaped his lips as the tiniest of movement was incredibly painful for him.   Nellie suddenly stirred from beside him and immediately started licking his face.  “Nellie..” Nick replied trying to push her off, gently.  “Stop it! Girl..” he said more firmly as he pulled himself in to a sitting position as the pain soared through his belly. He cried out in pain, causing Nellie crawl on to his lap and cock her little head as she looked at him, her doggy eyes full of concern.  “I’m okay, Nel.” Nick whispered trying to convince her as well as himself.  This definitely wasn’t trapped wind.  He didn’t feel good at all. He felt hot, too hot. Yeah. He was definitely, almost positive that he was running a temperature and the pain he was in was like nothing he’s ever felt before. He suddenly felt very nauseous. He bolted up and sprinted towards the toilet, every movement was agonising as the pain in his abdomen intensified.  He made it to the bathroom in just enough time as he projective vomited. Everywhere. He got most of it in the toilet bowl but it didn’t stop it spraying on to the floor and the tiled wall.  Nick slid down on to his knees as he hugged the toilet bowl for dear life.   He could hear the pitter patter of Nellies paws on the tiled bathroom floor behind him.  He felt his stomach flip as he vomited again. He felt really really ill.  He’s never experienced pain like this in his entire life. He finished being sick and wrapped him arm firmly around his stomach as he was hit by another pain. This one caused him to cry out again. It hurt so much, tears began to stream down his face.  Nellie left the room, she was going to get help. Something was wrong with her boy.   

Sarah was awoken from her slumber by Nellie jumping up on to her bed, which she did some nights but normally she would just curl down beside her and fall back over to sleep.  But not tonight.  Nellie jumped on to her, barking and trying her hardest to get her attention.  Sarah was wide awake in seconds.  “Nellie!! Sssh girl!” She said firmly.  The last thing she needed was for Nellie to wake up Nick and David, if he was even home yet that was. Little did she knew that Nick was already very much awake.  Nellie kept nudging against her and whimpering as if she was trying to tell her something.  Nellie started barking again and jumped down from the bed, racing towards the door and stopping, turning back and wondering why Sarah wasn’t following her.  Sarah frowned. Something was wrong. She could feel it. Nellie never behaved like this, especially not through the night.  She quickly got up, grabbing her dressing gown from the side and wrapping it around her body before following Nellie. “What is it girl??”    Sarah entered the bathroom and her heart broke as she saw the sight of her little boy curled up on the bathroom floor, sobbing and holding his stomach tightly.   “Nicky?” She fell to her knees beside him.  “Oh baby.” She cooed as she reached out to brush his sticky fringe, feeling the heat radiating off his skin she lay her hand flat on Nick’s forehead.  “Oh baby, you’re burning up!” She exclaimed. She glanced at the toilet as she could see the sick splattered bowl.  It all made sense how Nick seemed so out of sorts earlier.  He hadn’t been his usual self. She helped him into a sitting position. Nick gasped and cried out in pain.  “Oww.” He whimpered, gripping his abdomen for dear life. Sarah frowned.  “Is it your stomach?” She asked as she noticed that Nick’s knuckles were practically white as he clutched on to his poorly belly.   “It hurts..”  Nick cried.  Sarah got to her feet quickly and opened rue bathroom cabinet, she rummaged around and found what she was looking for. She bent down again. She switched the little ear thermometer on.  “I’m just going to take your temperature, Ok?” She told her son as she slipped the device in to his right ear before Nick had the chance to even protest, like he normally would.  Sarah held the thermometer in place until she heard the beep and removed it, glancing at the digital reading.   She frowned as she read the numbers.  39.8°c. 

Nick let out another painful cry as he gripped on to his stomach.  Sarah placed her hand on the area that Nick was holding so tightly and applied the tiniest amount of pressure. Nick yelped. Sarah’s suspicions were confirmed. She had to get her son to A&E.   “Has your tummy been hurting all day, sweetheart?”     “Since…yesterday.” Nick hissed out in between his pain.  “Oh baby, why didn’t you tell me?” Sarah asked.   “Sorry..” Nick replied, feeling sick again.   “No, darling.” Sarah soothed.  “You don’t need to apologise.” She ran her fingers through his damp hair.  Nick whimpered as he felt another stabbing pain in his side. “We’re going to the hospital!” She told him. Nicks eyes widened as fear flashed through them. He hated hospitals and doctors and anything medical like that. He had a fear of needles.  Sarah glanced at him as she saw the look on his face.  “We need to find out what’s making your stomach hurt so badly.”  She had a fair idea of what was causing it but she didn’t want to scare her son anymore than he evidently already was.  Sarah got to her feet. Just as she heard the front door opening and David stumbled up the stairs. Sarah sighed. She wasn’t too surprised that he was only getting home at 3:30am as some nights he was lucky if he even made it home at all.  David  reached the top of the stairs. “Why are you up?” He then stilled as he heard groaning coming from inside the bathroom. He frowned. “What’s going on?”   Sarah sighed.  “Your brother’s not feeling very well.”   David rolled his eyes as he peeked his head around the bathroom door. “What’s up with the princess?” He sneered. He wasn’t expecting to see Nick leaning his back against the bathtub, clutching his stomach tightly and looking fifty shades of white. Sarah grabbed David’s arm and pulled him back gently so that Nick wouldn’t be able to hear their conversation. She didn’t want to freak him out.   “I think it’s his appendix.” She said quietly. She was sure she seen the tiniest bit of genuine concern in her eldest son’s eyes. “I’m taking him to the hospital.”.  David’s eyes widened. He wasn’t expecting things to be that serious.  “I need you to help me get Nicky downstairs and in to the car.” Sarah told him.”How much have you had to drink?”   David just shrugged in response. “Just a few pints.” He answered but then spotted the pointed look that his mother was giving him. “Ok, and a couple of shots.”  He rolled his eyes.  “I’m not drunk though.” He confirmed.  “You might want to get Nick a jacket though.” He told her. “It’s freeing outside.”   Sarah paused for a moment.  Was David actually acting in a caring manner towards his brother? Was he running a temperature also.  “I’ll grab him something.”

Sarah got Nick a heavy jumper an got changed and then with David’s assistance got Nick down the stairs and in to the car. Nick had been less than amused that David was helping him and made sure he knew that he wasn’t happy.  “If you drop me. I’m burning your Christmas present.” He had hissed through gritted teeth.  “You can call this your present from me.” David had scoffed.  “I didn’t get you anything.”  Nick just rolled his eyes and mumbled ‘Delightful.” As Sarah bent over and clipped the seatbelt into place before draping a throw blanket over Nick. She closed the passenger door and turned around to David. “Are you coming, darling?”   David shook his head. “Nah. I’m exhausted.” He replied, selfishly. His caring brother facade had only lasted a few moments.  “Let me know what happens though, Yeah?”  Sarah just nodded and gave him a quick hug before moving to the drivers side and getting in the car.     

The car journey was hell warmed up for Nick as every time the car went over a bump, the pain in his stomach worsened. It was now a constant, burning pain. He just wanted it to stop hurting.  Sarah got him to the hospital in record timing.  Luckily the hospital staff could see right away the amount of pain Nick. He was taken into an examination room right away. Sarah closely by his side, refusing to leave as she filled out some paper work with Nick’s details.  “It’s ok, sweetheart.” She soothed as she quickly handed the clipboard over to a nurse and returned to Nick’s side, taking his hand and trying to comfort him.  “I’m here, Nicky, mums here..”     Nick was in complete agony. He was frightened and in pain. He didn’t know what was going on, but the pain he was currently experiencing was a clear indication that this wasn’t just a regular stomachache.  “I’m scared.” He whimpered as another wave of pain raged through his lower abdomen causing him to cry out loud. He gripped his tummy before groaning and leaning over the side of the bed and throwing up. He felt tears run down his face. He just felt so poorly and now embarrassed. 

“Oh sweetheart.” Sarah gasped as she rubbed soothing circles on her son’s back.  The nurse jumped in to action quickly as she rushed to Nick’s side with a tissue and wiped the vomit that had dribbled down his chin.  “Sorry.” Nick apologised quietly. He felt humiliated but he also felt too sick to care too much.  “You don’t have to apologise poppet.” The nurse told him softly as she bent down to clean up the floor. Nick lay back on the gurney. He just felt so unwell. His anxiety was through the roof.  He was suddenly consciously aware of a sharp stinging sensation in his forearm. It felt like a nip of a needle and he was correct as he watched a nurse insert an IV drip so they could start administering pain relief.  They wouldn’t be able to examine Nick properly until they got the pain under control a little bit.  Nick squeezed his eyes shut tightly. He hated needles. They terrified him. The whole idea of being in the hospital terrified him. I know, baby.” Sarah soothed.  “It’s ok. You’re okay.” She continued to squeeze his hand with one of her own as she brushed his hair away from his face with the other.  Any attempt to calm her son down and provide him with some sort of comfort.  After a few minutes. The doctor was able to carry out an ultrasound at confirmed the obvious. Nick was suffering from Acute appendicitis. Sarah made the right decision in bringing him in when she did. It wasn’t looking good. Nick’s appendix had ruptured.  

“Can you call down theatre. Tell them we’re on our way with a teenage boy with a severe case of ruptured appendix.” The doctor told one of his nurses who made a quick dash out of the room. Sarah turned to face the doctor, her eyes pleading for some information. She tried to listen to what they were saying but she couldn’t understand most of the medical jargon, but she was almost completely positive she heard them mention. Peritonitis. She was no medical professional but she knew that was serious. She knew that was a severe infection of the stomach lining. She didn’t let go of Nick’s hand at all.  “We need to prep Nick for surgery right away.” He explained as he removed the break on the bed, already starting to move it towards the door. Sarah followed, keeping a firm grip of her son’s hand.  “Mum.” Nick whispered. His tone shaking with fear, his eyes wide in terror. He looked petrified.  “It’s alright, darling.” She soothed.  “You’ll feel better soon, I promise.”   Sarah was trying her hardest to keep her own emotions in check. She had to stay strong for Nick, but seeing her child in so much pain and distress was breaking her heart.  “Can I stay with him?” She whispered to one of the other nurses who were following them down the corridor towards the lift that would lead to theatre.  “You can stay until he’s put under the anaesthetic.” She replied kindly. She could sense Nick’s distress. It would be more comforting to him to have his mum present whilst he was prepped for surgery. “I’m right here Nicky.” She assured him as they entered the lift. Nick knew what was happening.  He wasn’t stupid. They were going to cut him open and rip out his appendix whether he wanted it or not. He had no choice.  He felt sick. He wasn’t sure if it was just the Nausea or the fear of having surgery. 

Nick was dressed in a cheap hospital cotton gown and something was injected in to his IV to relax him. Sarah squeezed his hand tightly before bending down and kissing his forehead.  “I’ll be right here when you wake up, I promise.” She told him.  Nick couldn’t do anything other than nod. He felt paralysed by fear. They were going to put him to sleep and he couldn’t do anything to stop it. “Charlie.” He found himself mumbling. He wanted Charlie. He needed Charlie.  “I’ll call him, love,” Sarah assured him as he stroked his hand gently. She watched out of the corner of her eyes as the anaesthetist approached them carrying a mask. She felt Nick’s grip of her hand tighten.  “I don’t want surgery.” He said tearily.  “I want to go home.” He cried out.  Sarah felt a lump in her throat as she tried to comfort him the best she could. It broke her heart seeing her little boy in so much distress. “Ok Nicholas, I need you to take a big breath for me and count backwards from 10.”  The anaesthetist spoke as she secured the mask over Nick’s nose and mouth.  Nick took a deep breath in as he thought about Charlie. His boyfriend. His soulmate. Oh how he wished he was here right now.   “10…9…8…” he mumbled as he felt himself growing sleepy. “7…6…” he fell into a blanket of darkness as he drifted in to a drug induced slumber.  Sarah choked back a sob as she was lead out of the preparation bay and watched as the double doors to the operating theatre. She had just watched her little boy be put to sleep and he would soon be lying on a surgical table being cut open. She felt overwhelmed by emotions as a kind nurse lead her towards the waiting area and fetched her a cup of tea out of one of the machines in the corner of the room. 

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Charlie woke up to the sound of the bin lorry outside. He pulled his pillow over his head and grumbled. Typical being woken up early on the first day of the holidays. He stretched out in his bed and flopped back onto the mattress. 2 whole weeks of no school, lovely long lie ins and as much Nick as he wanted! Perfect. He was slowly waking up, thinking about what he needed to buy from the shop for their movie night when his phone buzzed next to him.He squeezed his eyes open and tried to focus on the messages on his screen. From Sarah? Why was she messaging him…he looked at his Lock Screen….at 6 in the morning? He felt a cold shiver run through him. No messages from Nick. What the hell was going on? Charlie unlocked his phone and stared at the information which popped up, his heart rate increasing with each one.

(6:45am) Sarah Missed call 

(6:55am) Sarah missed call 

(7:00 am) Sarah: Hi Charlie love, sorry to message you so early but could you give me a ring when you get this?  

Charlie shakily hit the call button and listened to it ring for what felt like forever until he heard Sarah’s voice. “Charlie? Thank you for ringing me sweetheart I’m so sorry for waking you up but I wanted to try and catch you before I go back to the waiting room where I have no signal.”“What’s happened? Waiting room? Is Nick with you?” His mind was going at a hundred miles an hour. What was going on? “It’s Nick, he wasn’t feeling very well last night and he woke up in the middle of the night in terrible stomach pain. We went straight to A and E and the doctors” She paused. The suspense was killing Charlie. “The doctors did some tests. I don’t want you to panic Charlie but he’s having emergency surgery.  His appendix burst and they are worried about infection…..”

Charlie felt like a bucket of ice cold water had been thrown over him. “Surgery?” He whispered.  “Like right now?” His mind immediately conjured up images of Nick on the operating table and he felt sick. "He’s been in theatre for a little while now so I’m hoping he will be out soon. I’ll keep you updated as much as I can, but he obviously won’t be on his phone for a bit.” Sarah explained. Charlie took in a deep breath.  “Erm, ok, can I come and see him?” “I’ll give you a ring as soon as I know more ok? Try not to worry.” Sarah assured him before ending the call as she was off to find an update on Nick. 

Charlie threw his phone on the bed and burst into tears. He knew Nick wasn’t right yesterday, he should have insisted he tell his mum and go to the GP. They could have caught it before it burst. Charlie was no doctor but he knew a burst appendix was serious. His spiralling thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock at the door. Tori peered her head round, “ Charlie? What’s wrong?” She sat at the end of the bed. Charlie told her about the call from Sarah. “And I need to know he’s ok. I’m going to go to the hospital, I can’t just sit here and wait for news. I won’t be able to focus on anything else.” Charlie fully expected his sister to tell him what a terrible idea that was but Tori could see there was no point arguing with him. “Just make sure you have breakfast before you go ok?”  Tori instructed. She knew nothing she did or said right now would change Charlie's mind. “Thanks Tor” Charlie pulled himself out of bed and headed for the bathroom.

In record time Charlie was showered, dressed and had eaten breakfast. Admittedly it wasn’t the biggest of breakfasts but he counted it as a win that he could eat anything. His mind was so focused on getting to the hospital and seeing Nick. Was he out of surgery yet? Had it been a success? He checked his phone for the millionth time, still no update from Sarah. Sighing, Charlie grabbed his coat and started to lace up his shoes. If he hurried he could get the bus that was leaving in 5 minutes. His hand was on the door handle when he heard the sounds of footsteps coming down the stairs. “Charlie? Just where do you think you are going at this time in the morning? You aren’t trying to sneak out to avoid coming to help with the Christmas food shop are you? You know how busy it gets.” Charlie took a deep breath and turned to face his mum. “I need to go and see Nick” Jane scoffed “Don’t be ridiculous, it’s far too early and you’ll be seeing him later tonight anyway!” Jane was not impressed, what on earth could be so important? She looked at Charlie, realising for the first time that his eyes were blood shot and red rimmed and he looked very much like he’d been crying. Her anger softened. “Charlie? What’s wrong? Have you two had a falling out?” Charlie shook his head as more tears sprang to his eyes. “He’s in hospital, Sarah just rang to say his appendix burst and he’s having emergency surgery right now. I need to be there mum, please don’t tell me I can’t.” Jane quickly pulled Charlie into a hug. “I’m sorry to hear that, but maybe you should wait until he’s out of surgery before going over there? You don’t want to get in the way.”   Charlie pulled away. “You don’t understand. I need to be there. I’ll go mad sitting at home just waiting. I can get a bus, it’s leaving in literally 2 minutes. Please!” His eyes pleaded with hers and Jane realised this wasn’t a battle worth fighting. “Ok, you can go. But I’ll drive you. Give me ten minutes and I’ll drop you on the way to the supermarket.” Charlie breathed a sigh of relief and thanked his mum. He’d be with Nick soon.

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Sarah had been sat in the uncomfortable plastic hospital waiting room chair for what felt like a lifetime. All she could think about was her beautiful little boy being cut open on an operating table. Her mind kept replaying the evening in her head. She just wished that Nick had told her he was feeling poorly. Then maybe they could have treated him earlier. She watched doctors come and go, the hospital was getting busy as the sun came up and people started arriving for their scheduled appointments. Suddenly she was aware of a doctor walking towards her. She was dressed in blue scrubs, her hair tied back neatly. “Mrs Nelson?” She enquired. Sarah stood up quickly, “How is he? Is he ok?” Her voice was trembling with emotion. The doctor put a hand on her arm kindly, “ I’m Dr Thomas, I operated on your son Nicholas.” Sarah took a deep breath and waited. “The operation was a success overall and Nicholas is in recovery. It was a little more complicated than a traditional appendectomy. We needed to clean out all the bacteria in his abdomen so we had to open him up rather than a laparoscopy. He’s going to need IV antibiotics for a few days and a lot of bed rest.” “But he’ll be ok?” Sarah asked in desperation “So long as we keep a close eye on him for any infection for the next few days yes I’m confident he will be absolutely fine in the long run.” Sarah sank down into the chair and put her head in her hands.  “Thank you so much,” she looked up at the doctor.  “Can I see him?”. She just wanted to be close to her little boy. “Of course, he’s in recovery at the moment, he hasn’t come round yet from the anaesthetic and he’s going to be very sleepy for the next few hours but having his mum with him when he wakes up will help keep him calm. Follow me and I’ll take you to see him.”

Sarah followed the doctor down endless corridors and through a set of double doors leading to the recovery bays. There were 6 beds, each with a privacy curtain. She was led to the bed at the end where the curtains were closed. Dr Thomas opened the curtain and gestured for Sarah to follow. She immediately made her way to the side of the bed and carefully picked up Nick’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. Nick lay silent and still in the bed, his chest slowly rising and falling with each breath. He was hooked up to a heart monitor, an IV in his arm which she assumed was giving him his much needed antibiotics. His cheeks were flushed and as she reached up to stoke his hair it felt damp with sweat. “Nicky? Baby? Mums here. You did so well my darling, it’s all over now.” Sarah pulled up the chair closer to the bed and sat down. A nurse appeared, checking the monitors. “Looks like someone is waking up!” She said cheerfully, making a note on the iPad. Sarah glanced at Nick’s face and sure enough she could see his eyes squeezing shut, his mouth in a grimace as a groan escaped his lips. He moved his head from side to side until Sarah placed a calming hand on his cheek. “I’m here Nicky, open your eyes sweetheart. It’s all ok now, you did brilliantly.”Nick was aware of quiet voices around him and a constant irritating beeping noise. He tried to open his eyes but his whole body felt like a dead weight. His tummy felt sore but nothing like the excruciating agony of before. Where was he again? Everything felt so muddled and hazy. He felt really nauseous. He could feel someone squeezing his hand, talking to him. Mum was here? Gradually he felt the cogs in his brain begin to turn and it all came flooding back to him. The pain, projectile vomiting in the bathroom, the trip to A and E, the ultrasound, being taken down for surgery. He forced his eyes open and saw his mums teary face looking down at him.

“Mum….” He whispered, squeezing her hand back “I feel sick….” Sarah glanced at the nurse who immediately produced a small cardboard sick bowl. “Don’t worry Nicholas, that’s just the anaesthetic it often makes people feel sick. I’ll just pop and get the doctor to prescribe something to ease it.” She swept out the room leaving Sarah holding the bowl for Nick, who had his mouth clamped shut, determined not to need to use it. Sarah gently stroked his hair and began murmuring comforting words to him. He closed his eyes and sank back against the pillow. He felt so awful. He was aware of the nurse returning and fiddling with his IV and gradually he felt like he could move his head without throwing up. “What time is it?” He mumbled. Sarah glanced at her watch. “It’s half eight baby, you were in theatre for a few hours. Do you remember what happened?” Nick gave a small nod. “You’ve been so brave darling, you should rest now. Everything went well.” Nick closed his eyes, his brain already half asleep when he suddenly opened his eyes wide and looked at his mum in panic. “Charlie?” His heart rate monitor started to pick up. “ I need to talk to Charlie, he’ll be so worried if I don’t answer my phone. We are meant to be having a movie night I..I" "Shh, calm down Nick. It’s ok, I’ve already told him where you are. I’ll give him a call once you are out of recovery and give him an update. You just concentrate on getting better ok?”

Nick relaxed back against the pillow and allowed his eyes to close. He was so sleepy, just a little nap and then he’d be able to go home. Nick dozed sleepily for the next half an hour until a nurse came along to say it was time to move him ward. Despite being sixteen, he was still under the care of paediatrics but luckily there was space in a single room so he wouldn’t have to share with lots of little kids. The nurse suggested Sarah go and grab a drink and then meet them up on the ward once they had a chance to get him settled. Sarah kissed his cheek. “ I’ll be back really soon poppet, you keep sleeping.” Nick barely acknowledged her with a mumble before falling straight back to sleep. Sarah squeezed his hand, then watched as the porters wheeled him away. Stretching as she got out of her chair, she realised just how exhausted she was. The adrenaline that was keeping her going had long worn off and now she was bone tired. Coffee, that’s what she needed. Lots of it. She decided to grab a drink in the cafeteria and then nip outside to phone Charlie and give him an update. She knew he’d be so worried about Nick. He was such a kind and caring boy. She knew how deeply both boys cared for one another. She took the lift down to the ground floor and walked the short distance to the cafe. As she was about to take her place in the queue she heard a familiar voice,

“Sarah?” Turning she saw Charlie sat at one of the tables nursing a cup of tea. He jumped up quickly and raced across to her. “I know you said you’d ring me, I’m sorry for just turning up but I was so worried and I just needed to be close. I don’t want to get in the way of anything, but I really would like to see him if he’s doing ok? Sorry, I really should have text…..” Sarah stopped Charlie’s ramblings by pulling him into a warm hug. “Oh you darling boy, of course it’s ok that you came. I’m sorry it took me so long, I was about to phone you. It’s been quite a night.” Charlie joined Sarah in the queue, looking anxiously at her for an update. “Is he ok?” Sarah let out a long breath. “The surgery went well, the doctor said it was a little complicated and so he’ll need to stay in hospital for a few days to have IV antibiotics. He’s just come round from the anaesthetic but he’s very sleepy still. They are transferring him up to the ward now so I thought I’d take advantage and get a drink then catch you up on everything.” Charlie let out the breath he didn’t know he was holding. Nick was going to be ok. He’d need to stay in hospital for a little while but he was alive and out of surgery. “Thank god.” Charlie rested his head on Sarah’s shoulder. “Do you think I could see him? Just so I can see for myself that he’s ok?” Sarah smiled, not in the least bit surprised by his request. “Why don’t you come up with me once I’ve had a coffee. He’ll probably be asleep for most of the day but I know seeing you will cheer him up. Between you and me he really isn’t a fan of doctors and hospitals and the thought of being here over the Christmas holidays is going to go down like a lead balloon!” 

Charlie grimaced in sympathy. He hadn’t even thought about the fact that Christmas was so close. In fact it was a couple of days away. Was he going to be let out before Christmas Day? Being in hospital would be awful, Nick would hate being away from his family, and from Nellie too. Seeing the distressed look on his face Sarah carried on. “Let’s just take it a day at a time ok? No need to worry about that today.” Charlie gave her a small smile and agreed. After a double shot cappuccino and a breakfast roll, Sarah felt like she might just have enough energy to get through the rest of the day. They walked up to the children’s floor of the hospital and had a quick chat with the nurse at the reception desk. “He’s in room 12, just along the corridor on the right. Still fast asleep last time we checked!” Sarah thanked him and they wandered along until they found the right room. Charlie immediately looked at his boyfriend laying in the bed. He was propped up slightly, a hospital blanket across his lap. He looked pale but feverish, the monitors beside him were beeping a steady rhythm. He gently touched his fingertips with Nick’s and bent down to give him a soft kiss on the cheek. He felt warm. “Does he have a fever?” He asked Sarah who was watching the exchange fondly from the other side of the bed. “Yes, there was a lot of bacteria from when the appendix burst, the doctors are working to get the infection under control. Hopefully the medication will bring his temperature down. They said we got him here just in time.” 

Charlie shuddered at the thought of what could have happened if Sarah hadn’t woken up and found him. As if reading his mind she added, “Nellie was the real hero, she came and got me. Was insistent I got up and went to the bathroom. If she hadn’t….” Sarah stopped, feeling her throat tighten as she welled up. Charlie knew what she was going to say. Nick could have died. It didn’t bear thinking about. “Nellie deserves all the treats in the world,” he smiled at Sarah. The chatter around him caused Nick to stir. He slowly opened his eyes, surprised to see that it wasn’t his mum holding his hand. Charlie? He tried to speak but only a croak came out. He was so thirsty. He started sitting up but a pain flashed through his abdomen. “Hey hey, easy Nick, just sit back and relax. It’s ok.” Charlie stroked his hair and smiled softly at him.  “You’ve just had surgery, you need to stay still. Are you thirsty?” Nick slowly nodded, still feeling groggy and confused. And so tired. Sarah poured him a cup of water and helped him take a few small sips. “There you go my darling, just a little, you don’t want it to go down the wrong way.” “Charlie…you’re really here?” Nick couldn’t quite believe it. His eyes were closing again, maybe this was all a dream. “I came as soon as I could. You just sleep babe, I’ll stay a little while.” Nick drifted back off again and Charlie looked up at Sarah. “ I don’t know what I’d have done if something happened to him,” he welled up. “I know sweetheart, I don’t know either.” She came round to his side of the bed and gave him a hug. “He’ll be ok, he just needs some time to heal.” Charlie let out a heavy sigh. “I had a feeling he wasn’t feeling well in school yesterday.” Charlie sighed, the guilt of not forcing Nick to tell someone that he was feeling poorly was eating away at him.    Sarah sighed. The last thing she was wanting was Charlie beating himself up. She felt guilty, too.  Nobody was to know that Nick had been seriously sick.  

“Don’t do that Charlie, darling.” She soothed as she reached over and squeezed his hand.  “I’ve been going over all the what if’s myself but neither one of knew that this was going to happen.”   Charlie just sighed.  “I take it Nick’s going to have to stay in here over Christmas?” He asked.  Today was the 22nd. Christmas Eve was the day after tomorrow.   “They haven’t confirmed it yet, but i have a feeling.” Sarah replied.   “My younger sister had her appendix out when she wasn’t much younger than Nicky. She spent 3 days in hospital and that was just a normal textbook case of appendicitis.” She sighed. Charlie glanced at Nick sadly as he knew his boyfriend would be devastated.  “Let’s just see what the doctors say, yes?” Sarah replied. They could at least stay hopeful. Charlie just nodded.  Sarah glanced at her sleeping son again before getting to her feet. Charlie glanced at her.  “I’m just going to nip outside for a moment and call David.” She announced. Charlie nodded.  Would David even care? He wasn’t exactly the best big brother.    “He helped me get Nicky in to the car. He’ll probably be wondering what’s going on.”   Charlie wanted to roll his eyes but he didn’t want to come across as rude. Of course David wouldn’t have wanted to come to the hospital as that would have meant giving a damn.   Charlie watched Sarah leave before turning his attention towards Nick again. He still couldn’t believe this has happened. Nick must’ve been in some amount of excruciating pain and must’ve been so terrified especially with his fear of needles and hospitals. It didn’t bear to think about it. Charlie was suddenly taken out is his train of thoughts by his phone buzzing in his pocket.  He took it out and glanced at the screen. The Paris squad group chat. He sucked in a deep breath. He had to alert his friends of what had happened.  

Tao: Are we all ready for festive movie night tonight!!! Mums made Bao Buns😁

Elle: YES!!!! We love you yan 

Tara: 😍😍😍 my belly is rumbling already. 

Darcy: you better have Home Alone lined up on the film list or I’m not coming 

Tao:🙄🙄

Darcy: ITS A CHRISTMAS CLASSIC 

Tao: next you’ll be demanding we watch the grinch….

Imogen: that’s my favourite Christmas film 💁🏻‍♀️

Tao: it’s overrated🫤 Charlie back me up here!! 

Elle: Charlie’s probably gone Christmas food shopping with his mum 

Darcy: I don’t envy you Charlie the shops will be BRUTAL 

Issac: They are!!! Mum made me go to Asda with her last night. It was awful🥲

Tara: Nick??? Please tell me you’ve made chocolate brownies for tonight 

Darcy: NICK??? are you awake?? 

Tao: Charlie??? 

Charlie sighed. He needed to tell them. They needed to know. He began typing but he knew no matter how he worded it, they were going to be so concerned.  

Charlie: Hi guys. Please don’t worry but I’m at the hospital? 

Elle: WHAT??? 

Darcy: Was Christmas food shopping really that bad? 

Tao: Charlie?? what’s happened? Are you okay??

Issac: What’s going on? 

Tara: guys let him explain… 

Charlie: I’m fine…It’s Nick. Nick is in hospital.

Darcy: WHAT? WHY? 

Elle: Is he okay? What’s happened? 

Charlie:  Nick was rushed in to hospital early hours this morning with an  appendicitis. He had to have emergency surgery as his appendix burst. It’s caused a serious infection so he’s on IV antibiotics to treat it. 

Tara: OMG! Poor Nick

Dara: Oh no. Is Nick okay? 

Tao: that sounds scary. Is he alright? 

Elle: You said Nick wasn’t feeling great yesterday Charlie. That’s so scary. I hope he’s okay. 

Charlie: Yeah. Sarah found him in the bathroom during the night in absolute agony and running a really high temperature. The doctor said she got him there just in time. 

Elle: Sarah must’ve been terrified. How’s he doing? 

Charlie: He’s been out of surgery for about an hour and a half. He’s napping. He’s really sleepy. They reckon he’ll be like this for a while. They need to try and get his fever and the infection under control. 

Sahar: omg! Poor Nick. 

Imogen: Poor Nicholas😭 I had my appendix out when I was 11. It wasn’t fun. Sending the biggest of hugs. 

Tara: do you know how long he’s going to be kept in for? 

Charlie: Not yet. Nick’s still really poorly right now ☹️ I have to go. I just wanted to let you all know

Tao: you should still come tonight. It might take your mind off things. 

Charlie: It wouldn’t feel right without Nick. 

Elle: I’m sure he wouldn’t want you to miss out Charlie. 

Charlie: I don’t know, l will think about it. 

Tara: tell Nick we’re all thinking about him 

Darcy: We will have the best sleepover when he’s home from the hospital. 

Elle: YES!! 

Charlie: Tnanks guys. I will update you all later.  

Charlie put his phone away just as Sarah re-entered the room. She informed him that she was just off the phone to David who was very concerned which caused Charlie to almost laugh and roll his eyes. She also explained that she had tried to get though to Nick’s father but she was met with a voicemail which she wasn’t surprised about as he wasn’t the most reliable man or easy to get a hold of.  Charlie stayed with them for another 20 minutes before Jane arrived at the hospital to pick him up. She popped on to the ward quickly as she had picked up some sandwiches and snacks for Sarah as she knew she’d be hungry and that hospital food wasn’t the most appealing. Nick spend the remainder of the day sleeping and only waking up for small intervals, taking little sips of water and drifting back to sleep. The nurses kept popping in every so often to check his temperature and blood pressure and to top up his Iv drip.  The next day which was the 23rd was pretty much the same. Nick dosed on and off and would wake for some water and exchange a few words with Sarah before going back to sleep. He was still in a great deal of pain so the nurses ensured he was getting enough morphine to ease any pain and discomfort he was feeling.  

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24th December (Present Day) 

Nick collapsed against the pillows and let out a huff as the nurse checked his temperature for like the third time that morning and tutted, obviously dissatisfied by the reading. He was evidently still running a fever.  He sighed. He really didn’t want to have to spend Christmas in hospital. It was the last thing he wanted.  He made an unimpressed face as the nurse placed his breakfast tray in front of him.  He wasn’t hungry, in the slightest.  But he knew that they wouldn’t discharge him until his fever was down and he appeared to have an appetite.   

“Morning baby.” Sarah said cheerfully as she entered the room carrying a bunch of flowers, a get well soon balloon and a bundle of cards.  Nick raised his eyebrow as she placed the lot down on the bedside table.  “Coach Singh dropped the chocolates and balloon off this morning and a card.” She smiled, in which Nick reciprocated. That was really thoughtful.  “The flowers are from Mrs Johnston next door.” She said, referring to their next door neighbour. “There’s also a card from Mrs Riley as well.”     “That’s nice.” Nick smiled as he opened the envelopes and handed the cards over to Sarah so she could display them next to the others.  The massive card from ‘The Paris Squad’ signed and doodled on by his friends, there was also an individual card from Charlie, one from his parents and Tori and a homemade card from Oliver. 

“You haven’t eaten very much.” Sarah commented glancing at the barely touched toast that was on the plate in front of her son.   “That’s because the nurse literally only brought it seconds before you arrived.” Nick replied pointedly as if he had every intentions of eating it. He didn’t.  Sarah sat down on the hard plastic chair next to the bed.  She gave him a firm look, nodding towards the plate. Nick just made a face. “Not that hungry.” He mumbled.  “Darling, you need to eat something.” Sarah sighed.  “If you want to go home.” Nick just scowled. “That’s blackmail.”   “You need to get you strength up.”   “I feel sick.” Nick sighed.  Sarah frowned. “Sick as in you’re going to actually be sick or just because you’re feeling poorly?” She questioned as she brushed his hair away from his forehead.  “I dunno….” Nick mumbled. He just didn’t have much of an appetite. Might be that fact that he had almost died. Untreated, peritonitis can be fatal. Of course he couldn’t just have a normal stomachache that would go away after rest and painkillers. No, he had to be dramatic and require surgery and a hospital stay. Just before Christmas.   Sarah scooted the plate closer to her son.  “Just a few bites, for me?” She asked with a hopeful glimmer in her eyes.  Nick glanced at her. She was very persuasive. How could he say no to that?  “I will try some.” He sighed as he lifted up a piece of toast and nibbled a little bit off the corner. He wasn’t hungry at all. He had no appetite, but he didn’t want to worry his mum even more than she evidently already was. 

Later in the afternoon, Nick was scrolling on his phone while his mum sat beside him playing some sort of game on her ipad. Every so often she would lay her hand on Nicks arm and give him a small reassuring squeeze. They were waiting for the doctor to come to do the daily rounds and she knew how desperately he wanted to be given the all clear to go home. She was too, though only if it was safe for him. He’d been through so much in the past few days and he was still so sore and tired from the surgery. He had barely eaten any breakfast again and she also had a suspicion his temperature was still slightly raised but didn’t dare bring that up with him. Suddenly there was a sharp knock on the door and Dr Thomas arrived, followed by a gaggle of what must have been student doctors, all with iPads which they were staring at intensely.  “Good afternoon Nicholas! How are you feeling today?”Nick put his phone down on the bed next to him and tried to straighten up in bed, wincing as he pulled on his stitches. “Ah, still a bit sore are you? That’s to be expected, you’ve got quite a few stitches there. Try not to move too quickly.”

“Yeah, sorry, “ Nick tried to breathe through the flare of pain, “I’m feeling a lot better today. So do you think I can go home?” “Well, let’s take a look at you shall we?” Dr Thomas began her examination, checking his vitals, including his temperature. She gently lifted up his pyjama top and removed the bandage covering his incision, showing the student doctors and explaining what she was looking for as she continued. Nick stared at the ugly raised line on his stomach, the area around the stitches was a bit pink and angry looking. He looked away quickly, feeling a little nauseous at the sight. He saw the doctor make notes on his chart before one of the students replaced the bandage and covered him back up.  “So what are we thinking?” Sarah looked at the doctor, her hand firmly in Nicks. Dr Thomas sighed and looked at them with sympathy. “I know you had your heart set on going home today…” Nicks heart sank, “…but Nick, you have had a fairly major surgery, a nasty infection in your abdomen and you are still running quite the temperature. We really need to make sure we don’t send you home with an infection that could get worse very quickly. I know it’s not what you want to hear but I cannot discharge you today. I want to keep you here for at least another 48 hours to be on the safe side.”

Nick stopped listening. 48 hours? So he was going to miss the whole of Christmas, including Boxing Day. He felt himself tear up and desperately tried to blink away the tears. He was not going to cry in front of all these doctors. “Oh darling, I’m so sorry,” Sarah gave him a gentle hug as she spoke with the doctor. “I know it’s for the best, he’s just disappointed at staying in for Christmas. "That’s totally understandable, Nick I promise it won’t be so bad. You can have a celebration when you get home.” Sarah and the doctor spoke a little more before they all left, closing the door behind them.Nick turned his head away from his mum and closed his eyes. He was so completely and utterly fed up. Another two days in the hospital. In this uncomfortable bed without Nellie to keep him company. He heard his phone buzz but he couldn’t face opening his eyes to have a look. If he did he knew he would start to cry and he didn’t want to upset his mum. Sarah sighed and ran her hands through her hair. She knew that Christmas was just a day and that it really didn’t matter if they celebrated a couple of days late. But she also knew how much Nick loved Christmas and she could see how gutted he was. Picking up her phone she opened her text message thread with Charlie.

Sarah: Happy Christmas Eve Charlie! Change of plans I’m afraid. The doctor has just been and Nick won’t be home before Boxing Day.  His fever hasn’t gone down enough for them to safely discharge him. He’s really disappointed and I know a visit from you would cheer him up if you have any time this afternoon? Please don’t worry if you have family over!  I know it’s a busy time for everyone. 

She sent off the message and popped her phone down. She looked over to Nick who was still facing away from her with his eyes closed. She didn’t think Nick was actually asleep but she knew he needed some time in his head to process everything that he’d been told.

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Charlie spring was excited.  It was Christmas Eve. He loved Christmas. He loved everything about it. The Christmas movies and music, how everywhere was decorated in bright lights and tinsel weeks before the big day, he loved watching the excitement on his little brothers face. Oliver was six. Everything was still so magical for him.  Just like any other family. The spring family had their own Christmas Eve traditions. Which involved an afternoon visit to grandmas for an early Christmas lunch, a family walk around the neighbourhood admiring all the Christmas lights and also an excuse to tire Oliver out for bedtime. They would then settle down and watch the polar express, before and over excited Oliver Spring would sprinkle magical reindeer dust out in the front path and leave mince pies and milk out for Santa, and not forgetting the carrots for the reindeer.  This year was different though, as after deep persuasion with his parents, he has managed to get out of the afternoon trip to grandmas. He had other plans.  He pulled his phone out and clicked on to a group chat that he had started with the Paris Squad (minus Nick) as he had planned a surprise and he didn’t want Nick to see any of the messages. Charlie smiled as he read through the text chat from the group. He was so excited to go and see Nick later and surprise him. He knew that Nick would need lots of rest and he was weirdly looking forward to looking after him for a change. Making sure he stayed in bed, bringing him cups of tea and giving him lots of cuddles. A text from Sarah popped up and he swiped over to their chat, his heart sinking as he read her message. Poor Nick, he was so looking forward to coming home today and he really really didn’t want to be in hospital over Christmas. Charlie wasn’t completely surprised that he had to stay in, he looked so poorly still yesterday when he visited, mostly asleep and barely noticed he was there.  But he seemed more awake today in his texts and so determined to escape. He quickly fired off a text to Sarah to say that he would definitely be there later and then he opened up his chat with the Paris squad minus Nick.

Charlie - hey guys. Bad news, Nick has to stay in for Christmas so we can’t do our chilled Xmas movie surprise we had planned. 

Tara - oh no! That sucks. Poor Nick, did they say why?

Charlie - His mum didn’t say much but he looked so poorly yesterday I’m not surprised. She said he’s really disappointed. 

Elle - that’s so rubbish. 

Darcy - Noooo poor Nick! Let’s bring the movie surprise to him?

Tara - Darcy! We can’t just all crash his hospital room!

Darcy - why not?! 

Charlie - that’s not actually a bad idea Darce!! He’s in a private room so it might be possible. What do you all think? Visiting hours start at 3pm…who reckons they could get there for then? 

Tao - I’m in, anything to avoid spending the afternoon with my grandparents!

Elle - Tao! 

Tao - and of course to cheer Nick up too.

Charlie - ok, let’s meet at the entrance to the hospital at 3. Tao can you bring your dvd player? I’ll bring some Christmas crackers. Mum has bought far too many!

Tao - yes, and I’m choosing the movie!

Issac - I’ll bring some snacks.

Charlie - I’m not sure he’ll be up to eat much but the rest of us will!!

Tara - see you there!

Charlie put his phone down with a small smile. They really did have the best friends. He checked the time. Shit, he’d need to get moving to make it on time. He grabbed his bag, and hurtled down the stairs. “I’m off to see Nick!” He yelled to anyone who was listening. “Back for dinner Charlie.” He heard his mum’s voice from the kitchen. “Remember your grandparents are coming.” “Yeah I will,” Charlie slammed the door shut behind him and jogged to the bus stop. Luckily the bus was due and Charlie arrived at the hospital just before 3. The rest of the paris squad came soon after and they all made their way up to the ward. “I’d better warn his mum before we barge in there,” Charlie ushered everyone to one side of the corridor and quickly text her. He got an instant thumbs up reply from Sarah. “Ok, let’s go!”

Nick was laying in bed staring up at the ceiling. His mum had tried to talk to him, offered to play a game of uno with him, but he just wasn’t in the mood. He sighed loudly as his mum checked her phone, looking at her as she smiled at the text she was reading. “You up for a visitor Nicky?” She asked him. “Depends who it is. It’s not David is it?” Nick grimaced as he didn’t think he could cope with a visit from his brother right now. “Nope!” Sarah was beaming as she glanced over to the door. Nick followed her gaze and his mouth fell open when he saw all his friends peering round the door at him. “Surprise!!” They all yelled as they bundled into the room, quietening down when they saw Nick properly for the first time. He really didn’t look great, so pale with bags under his eyes and still hooked up to an IV line. They all tentatively stepped towards him. Charlie spoke first. “We heard you weren’t going to be able to come home today. We’d planned to surprise you with a movie afternoon at yours but we thought maybe we’d bring it to you instead?” Nick just stared at them, his brain slowly processing the fact that all his friends had given up their Christmas Eve afternoon to spend time with him in his crappy hospital room. “Erm, we can go if you aren’t feeling up to it?” Charlie hesitated, watching his boyfriend’s reaction.

“I can’t believe you are all here to see me,” he whispered, welling up. His emotions really were all over the place at the moment. “Of course it’s ok for you to be here!”  He held out his arms and they all gave him possibly the most careful hug he’d ever had. “I’m going to head out for a bit Nicky, let you enjoy spending some time with your friends.” She kissed the top of his head and picked up her bag. “Call me if you need me Charlie.” Charlie gave her a nod and focused his attention on Nick who was looking extremely overwhelmed but also was smiling for the first time in days. “Right!” Tao clapped his hands, putting himself in charge. “Let’s get this movie started or it won’t be finished before visiting hours are over!” Nick smiled as Charlie opened his bag and handed out crackers for everyone. They pulled them, squealing at the noise and giggling as they each popped on a paper hat. Isaac opened the snacks and placed them on Nick’s table. “I know you aren’t very hungry,” he said kindly, “but just have whatever you like .”

Nick felt so loved and cared for in that moment. They all settled down to watch the movie. Charlie carefully climbed onto the bed next to him, careful of his IV line and Nick put his arm around him. “I can’t believe you organised all this. I love you so much.” “Everyone was so keen to see you and cheer you up babe, we all love you a lot.” Nick finally let a tear escape as he hugged Charlie close. All too soon the movie was over and visiting hours were done. Nick gave everyone a hug and thanked them for giving up their afternoons. As they all piled out of the room, Charlie hung back to give him a final kiss. “I’ll ask my mum if I can pop in to see you tomorrow ok?” Charlie whispered, his forehead touching Nick’s. “Kay” Nick gave him one last kiss and watched as he left, closing the door behind him. He really was lucky to have such amazing friends. He felt better than he had in days. Sarah returned to the room a little while after they had all left and she could instantly see the change in her son’s mood. Yes, it didn’t change the fact that he would indeed be spending Christmas Day in hospital but having that little interaction with his friends and definitely boosted his mood and made the thought a little more bearable. 

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Christmas Day in hospital was weird. It started early when the nurse came in at 6am to do his obs. “Merry Christmas!” She sang at him as he struggled to open his eyes. “Sorry to wake you so early. We’ll be round with some breakfast soon.” Nick nodded to show he understood then closed his eyes again and drifted back off. The morning passed by quite quickly. The only highlight when a nurse appeared with a small gift. She placed it in his hands saying, “Father Christmas has been on the ward delivering presents for all the little ones here today. I didn’t think you’d appreciate a visit personally but everyone likes presents so we kept a few back for the older teenagers.”Nick smiled softly at her, “That’s really kind of you, thank you.” He opened it up to find a pair of fluffy socks, a chocolate bar and a puzzle book. He grinned up at her as she left with a smile and a wave. Maybe that wasn’t so bad after all? At least he was on the mend and would hopefully be going home soon. He thought about the patients in more critical circumstances that wouldn’t be able to celebrate Christmas. It saddened him and made him appreciative of the fact that he was still getting to enjoy some sort of Christmas Day. Even if he was cooped up here.  

Sarah arrived just before lunch, dragging a sullen looking David with her. “Merry Christmas darling!” She gave him a warm hug and kissed his cheek. “Yeah, merry Christmas,” David grumbled. He looked like he’d rather be anywhere else, but one glance from his mum and he changed his expression, softening.  “We are saving Christmas dinner till you get back, so hurry up and get well.” Nick looked at home curiously, that almost sounded like he cared. He turned back to his mum who had a bag of presents with her. “I thought we could open one gift each and save the rest for when you come home,” she announced. They each took a present, unwrapping them eagerly. Nick was very pleased with a new switch controller. He needed one seeing as his brother kept ‘borrowing it’ and returning it in all sorts of states. David opened an expensive looking cologne and Sarah opened a small photo frame that Nick had already had wrapped under the tree for her. It had a picture of Sarah, Charlie and Nick walking Nellie in the park. “Oh baby I love it!” She exclaimed, giving him another kiss. His Christmas dinner was absolutely disgusting, his appetite still wasn’t very good and he struggled to get much of it down. David hoovered up the rest and then wandered to the vending machine to get more snacks. They passed the time watching the tv and chatting. Charlie popped his head round the door late in the afternoon just as Sarah and David were leaving. They didn’t get long together before his mum was texting to say she was outside in the car waiting but Nick was grateful for the time he got. They were able to have a Xmas cuddle and Nick listened while Charlie complained about his annoying relatives. 

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Finally in the afternoon on Boxing Day, they gave him permission to go home. He was on strict bed rest for a week, and Sarah was advised to check his temperature regularly, bringing him straight back if he showed any signs of a returning fever while he healed. He’d be out of rugby for at least 6 weeks. Nick didn’t care, he just wanted to get home to his own bed, to Nellie who probably saved his life, and to his boyfriend who he knew was eagerly waiting for his return. As he sat in the back of the car, careful to avoid knocking his stomach he text Charlie to let him know the good news. By the time he arrived home, Charlie was sat on the doorstep waiting for him. “Right,” Sarah declared from the drivers seat, “ let’s get this Christmas officially started!” Sarah and Charlie helped Nick to slowly walk up the drive and into the house. Nellie was at his side instantly, he gave her a scratch behind the ears. “Thanks Nell, you are the best dog in the whole world, do you know that?” Nellie responded by licking his face and then settling down at his feet on the sofa. Nick grinned at Charlie who produced a large gift bag from behind his back.  “Ok! Time for presents!!”

Sarah made a quick start in prepping the rest of their belated Christmas feast after ensuring Nick was comfortably resting on the sofa. In the comfort of his own Pyjamas and a thick throw blanket draped across him. Nellie was curled at his feet and Charlie was sitting so that Nicks head was resting in his lap, that way he was lying comfortably as his stomach was still very sore and tender and they didn’t want to risk him tearing the stitches.  Charlie had placed his gifts for the Nelson’s on top of the pile of untouched gifts that lay under the tree. A neatly wrapped box shaped gift with a beautiful red bow on top for Sarah. There was even a small gift bag for David as much as he loathed the elder Nelson and how uncomfortable he made Nick feel, he wouldn’t intentionally leave him out. And there was of course several wrapped gifts addressed to Nick as he had gotten slightly carried away.  

Sarah finished glazing the turkey before popping it back in to the oven along with the roast potatoes and after one final check of the vegetables that were steaming away on top of the stove. She smiled pleased with herself and returned to the living room where the present exchanging commenced.  Nick lay comfortably on the couch watching as one by one Sarah, David and Charlie opened their gifts. He claimed that he would open his shortly. He was just exhausted. He enjoyed watching people opening gifts rather than being the one opening them. He watched as Sarah doted over the perfume set that he had purchased for her. He knew it was her favourite. She was also delighted by the Necklace gifted from David and the box set of books from Charlie, based on a movie that she had recently watched and hinted that she would be interested in reading the books. Charlie was over the moon with his new knitted sweater from Sarah. His switch game and drumsticks from Nick as well as Tickets to see one of his favourite bands on tour in the new year.  David had gifted him a Costa coffee gift card. Not that he had ever shown interest in drinking coffee before but the thought was still there…kind of. 

David tore through his gifts, eventually thinking everyone when he saw Sarah’s warning glance. He glanced up at his little brother on the couch. “Thanks.” He nodded as he held on to the headphones that Nick had gifted him.  “Thought you were going to burn my present.” He smirked. Nick rolled his eyes. “I didn’t have the energy.” He said sarcastically. “Besides my appendix had other ideas.” David snorted as he reached behind the tree and pulled out a flat square shaped wrapped gift and handed it over to Nick who looked at him suspiciously.  “I thought you didn’t buy me anything…”   “I lied.” David replied gesturing for Nick to open his gift.  Nick, with Sarah’s help moved in to a sitting position, propped up by his pillow. He tore away the paper, revealing the paper. He couldn’t stop the small grin that appeared on his face as he held a Vinyl record of Taylor Swifts most recently released album.  He glanced at Charlie who was smirking at him in pure amusement “Nicholas Nelson. I did not know you’re a massive swiftie!”   Nick’s cheeks blushed red.  “Damn right!” David laughed. “I think your obsession is ridiculous but HMV had a sale on..”    Nick just rolled his eyes but David had gotten him something he genuinely liked rather than just getting him anything, so he couldn’t fault him for that. “Thank you, David.”

Sarah gathered all the discarded paper into a bin liner before dishing up the plates. She knew Nick still didnt have much of an appetite and probably wouldn’t eat much so she gave him a much smaller portion that consisted of some very thinly sliced slices of turkey, a few roast potatoes, a Yorkshire pudding and some veg drizzled with a little gracy. She wasn’t expecting him to eat everything but she would be satisfied if he at least tried. Normally occasions like this called for eating at the dining table but Nick was in no fit state to sit at the table and she wasn’t about to leave him alone so the exception was made for them all to eat in the living room.  Charlie tucked in to the food, he hadn’t eaten yet today so he was actually hungry and Sarah’s cooking always tasted delicious.  “Amazing as usual, mum..” David complimented as he hungrily tucked in to his heaped plate of food. Sarah eyed Nick’s plate carefully as she sliced in to her own turkey. He had eaten a little of the meat and was nibbling on a roast potato. “You don’t have to force it, Nicky.” She assured him. “Just eat what you can manage, darling.”   She knew it was going to take a good few days of rest and recovery until Nick was properly on the mend but he was home and he was alright and that was what mattered the most.  

After they had finished. David helped Sarah clear up the kitchen, much to her surprise. Charlie set up a Christmas movie on Netflix ready to hit play when Sarah had returned. He offered to help with the cleaning up but she kindly declined. She knew he’d much rather be sitting keeping Nick company.  “I’m so happy to be home.” Nick breathed out contentedly as he rested his head on Charlie’s shoulder.  “I’m so glad you’re okay.” Charlie whispered. “I was so worried when your mum called me.” He admitted.   “I’m sorry.” Nick sighed.  Charlie rolled his eyes.  “Nick Nelson! Are you seriously apologising for having to have your appendix removed? You really are ridiculous.” He said affectionately. Nick chuckled, being careful not to overdo it. His stomach ached when he laughed too much.  “I just don’t like the idea of you being scared.” He said.   “I…I was terrified.” Charlie admitted. “When your mum explained how serious it was. I…I thought you were going to die.” He admitted. He just had to say it out loud because it had been playing on his mind for days. He had nightmares about what could have happened.  “I nearly did.” Nick shuddered as he looked down at a sleeping Nellie. “If it wasn’t for Nel..” he sighed.  “She’s such a clever dog.”   Charlie said. “Yeah.” Nick agreed. “She literally saved my life.”   “I’m so glad that she did.” Charlie smiled softly as he placed a soft kiss on Nick’s cheek.   “You just had to be over dramatic and have more than just a simple appendicitis.” He chucked.  Nick smirked. “Where’s the fun in doing things simply?” Charlie just rolled his eyes as he cuddled up closer to his boyfriend, being careful not to bump Nick’s stitches.  Sarah returned in to the sitting room a few minutes later with a tray of hot chocolates and a packet of shortbread biscuits. She glanced at the TV. Love Actually. She smiled. She was still getting to do one of her traditions with Nick even if it was a bit later than normal this year. Despite it being a different kind of Christmas than usual and day late. It had still been a wonderful afternoon. 

Chapter Text

“Ok Nicky, I’m off out now,” Sarah Nelson’s voice came from the hallway where she was putting her coat on and checking her reflection in the mirror. She was heading out to her sister’s house for the evening to have dinner and watch a movie. She was really looking forward to a catch up with Diane over a glass or two of wine. “You sure you can manage the food without me?” Nick appeared at the kitchen door. He gave her a reassuring smile as she grabbed her keys from the side. “Mum I’ll be fine, it’s only pasta and a veg sauce, I’ve cooked it for us before.”

“ I know dear, but usually I’m here. I don’t want you getting distracted by Charlie and burning the whole house down!” She teased him. Nick’s cheeks flushed pink, “Mum! We won’t get distracted! I’ve already baked the muffins for dessert so there’s barely anything left to do.” Nick was so excited, Charlie was coming round to celebrate their one year anniversary. He couldn’t believe it had been a whole year already. In some ways it felt like they had been together forever but in others it felt like yesterday when they were sat on the floor at Harry’s party and Nick was confessing his crush on someone who wasn’t a girl. They often joke argued about whether that was the first day of their relationship or the next day when Nick had run to Charlie’s house in the rain.

They’d decided to celebrate the second date and Charlie was on his way over. It hadn’t been an easy year at times, Charlie’s admission to the inpatient facility had been really tough for them both. But he was in a good place at the moment and Nick was so excited to cook for him. Pasta was on his safe foods list and he’d cleared the ingredients with him in advance.
Sarah interrupted his thoughts, “Ok, well have fun darling and phone me if you need me. I’ll be home around 10 I imagine as I have work tomorrow. Make sure Charlie gets home before his curfew or I’ll have an angry Jane on the phone to me!” Nick grinned as he reassured his mum, giving her a hug as she made her way out the door. He closed the door behind her and returned to the kitchen. He really needed to get a move on.

Nick spent the next ten minutes chopping the veg for the pasta sauce and setting the table. His mum had put a little vase of flowers in the centre. Nick was a bit worried Charlie would think he was even more of a sap than normal, but if he couldn’t show his sappiness on their anniversary then when could he!
He dashed upstairs to change and was just putting a clean t shirt over his head when the doorbell rang. He barrelled down the stairs, opened the door and threw himself at Charlie, who nearly fell backwards with the force. “Ooof, Nick!!” Charlie chuckled as he returned the hug. “You giant rugby idiot I nearly fell over!”
Nick kissed Charlie gently on the lips,” I’d never let you fall Char,”

“Oh my god you are so cringe” Charlie answered, but the smile on his face gave away how much he loved it. Nick grabbed his hand and brought him into the hallway, closing the door behind him. He wrapped his arms around him and buried his face in the crook of Charlie’s neck. “Happy one year anniversary, Char,” he breathed. Charlie squeezed him back. “Happy Anniversary Nick.” They stayed in the hallway for a moment, just enjoying being together. Charlie broke away from the hug first.

“Something smells good,”

“Come through to the kitchen, it’s pretty much ready to go,” Nick pulled Charlie into the Nelson’s kitchen diner. “I just need to cook the sauce through and put the pasta on.” Charlie took a seat at the kitchen island. “Can I help at all?” Charlie questioned, looking at all the neatly chopped vegetables. Nick was a surprisingly tidy cook. He had half expected the kitchen to look like a bomb had exploded. He loved that Nick wanted to cook for them both and he was quietly proud of himself of how far he had come that the thought of it didn’t fill him with fear like it might have done a few months ago.

Nick shook his head. “Nope it’s all under control. You just sit there and look gorgeous . Maybe choose some music for us to listen to?” He tossed his phone at Charlie who immediately started scrolling his Spotify playlist. Nick filled the kettle with water and clicked it on, then began to weigh out the pasta, placing it ready in the saucepan. He started frying up the vegetables, adding the tomato sauce, letting it simmer while the pasta cooked.
“Soooooo….” Charlie looked at Nick, who was concentrating on grating some cheese. “I might have got you a little something?” He bent down to grab his bag and pulled out a soft looking wrapped gift. Nick turned away from the worktop and beamed at Charlie.

“I might have got you a little something too! “ he raced through to the lounge, coming back with a blue striped gift bag which he triumphantly thrust at Charlie. They eagerly swapped gifts, looking at each other with a grin. “You go first Char.”insisted Nick. Charlie peeked into the gift bag, a soft smile appearing on his face as he pulled out a black cat plushy. “It reminded me of you,” Nick blushed. Charlie stroked the soft fur and then leaned over to kiss Nick. “I love it.” he carefully placed the cat on the table. “Your turn!”

“Ok, just a sec, I need to check the dinner,” he gave it a quick stir and then turned his attention back to Charlie. Carefully opening the present he gasped as he realised what it was, “Oh my god Charlie! The New England rugby shirt!! This is way too much,” he leapt across to give him a hug. “I love it so much! I’m gonna put it on now,”

Nick was about to swap his shirt when the alarm when off on the Alexa to tell him the dinner was ready. “Maybe wait till after dinner,” Charlie chuckled. “ You don’t want to get tomato sauce on a white top! “Yeah, you are probably right,” Nick agreed, turning to grab the pan from the stove and getting ready to drain the water into the sink.

“Besides, “ Charlie added, “ you can save the stripping off for later!” He grinned mischievously at Nick who whipped round to look at him. Unfortunately as he twirled round to give a cheeky look to Charlie he didn’t pay attention to what he was doing. The next thing he knew he felt scalding hot water pouring over his hand. He dropped the pan in the sink, instantly grabbing his hand with the other and letting out a muffled, “Fuck! Shit!”

Charlie watched in horror as Nick clutched his hand. “Nick, oh my god are you ok?” Nicks face was flushed red and his mouth was squeezed shut in a tight line. “Run it under cold water!” Charlie raced to the sink, quickly moving the pasta out the way and turning on the cold tap full blast. He grabbed Nick’s hand and held it under the water. It was bright red and angry looking.
“It’s fine Charlie, it’s not that bad,” Nick protested. He was absolutely furious with himself for being so careless and determined that he was not going to ruin their anniversary dinner. “Let’s just eat, I’ll put some cream on it or something from the first aid kit. “ he started to take his hand away from the sink.

“Oh no you don’t mister,” Charlie guided his hand back to the running water. “You need to keep it under there for at least ten minutes!” Charlie thought back to his brief spell as a scout when he was little and the first aid training they all took part in. He knew that it was vital they cooled his skin down. He looked at Nick’s hand and winced. It looked really sore. “ I think we should phone your mum,” he looked at Nick anxiously. “It looks bad.”

Nick shook his head. “No need, Char.” He replied through gritted teeth.  “I’m fine!”  He was definitely not fine. His hand was nipping like mad. The cool sensation of the water wasn’t doing much to ease the pain he was feeling.  He had one job. One simple job. To cook dinner and he couldn’t even do that, he had to just go ahead and spoil their anniversary dinner by being careless and clumsy.  Charlie glanced at Nick’s hand as he ran it under the cold water tap, still. He didn’t like the look of it at all. It was scarlet red and looked as it was already starting to blister.  That wasn’t good. He reached out for Nick’s phone that was sitting on the edge of the kitchen worktop.  He ignored Nick’s protests before unlocking it and dialling Sarah’s number. It rang out for a few moments before she answered.

“Hello? Nicky?”

“Sarah? It’s Charlie.” Charlie said instantly  not taking his eyes away from Nick who was still soaking his hand under the cold water. 

“Charlie?? Is everything alright, darling? Where’s Nick?”  Sarah replied, her voice laced with concern.

“Don’t panic.” Charlie replied quicky. He rolled his eyes at himself, obviously telling someone not to panic was just going to make them panic.  “Nick’s had a bit of an accident.” 

“Accident? What kind of accident?” Sarah shrieked hysterically from the other end of the phone. 

“He’s scalded his hand with some boiling water.” Charlie replied. He was no medical expert but he knew Nick needed to get checked out at A&E. it was a pretty bad burn.  “I…I told him to run it under the cold tap..I..I don’t know know of that was the right think to do.” Charlie rambled on in a panicked tone.

“No, no darling. You’ve done exactly the right thing.” Sarah replied, calmly.  “Ok, here’s what to do. I want you to keep Nick’s hand under the water. I’m leaving Diane’s right now and I’ll be there in 15 minutes, top.” She instructed. Charlie could tell that she was panicked but she remaining calmed which also calmed him. He had to stay calm for Nick’s sake. He glanced down and Nick’s hand. It looked worse that he initially though.  Nick’s entire left hand was bright red and covered in angry looking blister that went from the back of his and around his wrist.  He put the phone down on the side and placed a hand on Nick’s back in a comforting manner.  “Your mum is on her way. She won’t be long.” He assured his boyfriend. He noticed how quickly Nick was breathing. His mouth was clenched shut in an obvious attempt not to scream out in pain.

Sarah was already putting her shoes on and searching for her bag as she hung up the phone with Charlie. Diane, who was listening with increasing worry to one half of the conversation, looked at Sarah, “What’s happened? What’s wrong?”
Sarah took a shaky breath as she put on her coat,” It’s Nicky…that was Charlie on the phone, Nicks burnt himself with boiling water…I need to go home and see if he’s ok. He might need to go to an and e…”She explained. Completely beside herself with concern. “Charlie sounded so worried on the phone and I have no idea if it’s bad or not…”

“Oh my god, “ Diane gasped, she loved her youngest nephew so much and hated to think of him hurting. “Let me come with you I can drive you to the hospital if needs be.” Sarah shook her head. “No, no you have the kids here and Phil’s out with the boys.” Sarah was so grateful to her sister for offering but she just wanted to get home quickly and not waste time sorting out childcare for the little ones. She gave her sister a quick hug, “Sorry for abandoning our plans.”  Diane shook her head. “Don’t be ridiculous and make sure you call me as soon as you can ok? I can be there if you need me.”

“Thanks Di,” Sarah took a deep breath and raced out the door to her car.

Thankfully she hadn’t had time for a glass of wine yet. She’d planned on getting a taxi home later, but her plans for a wine filled gossip with her sister hadn’t even begun when she got the call from Charlie. As she drove faster than she probably should across town, all the worst case scenarios kept popping into her mind. Why didn’t Nick call her himself? How badly had he scolded himself? Would it heal up ok? Would he be scarred? She didn’t even know which hand it was. Was it his writing hand? So many questions, she just needed to get home.

Charlie looked up at the clock on the kitchen wall, it felt like the minute hand was going backwards. Where was Sarah? Nick was trying really hard not panic but he could tell from his hunched shoulders and flushed face that he was hanging on by a thread. His hand had been under the cold water for ten minutes now and Nick was beginning to shake slightly . He looked like he was going into shock.
“I’m s s so s s sorry Charlie,” his voice was coming out in little gasps as he held his breath through the stinging pain.


Charlie rubbed his back gently. “Stop saying sorry, this isn’t your fault. And I think I remember you banning the s word!” That got a tiny smile from Nick. Suddenly the front door crashed open and Sarah came charging into the kitchen, chucking her bag down on the dining table as she raced across to Nick.

“Oh darling, what on earth happened,” she rubbed Nick’s arm soothingly as she inspected his red, blistered hand. “Oh baby that looks really sore.” The relief that she had returned hit both boys instantly. Charlie moved out of the way to let Sarah take over and Nick felt the adrenaline leave his body as he realised his mum was here to make everything better. “It really hurts,” he whispered to her, tears springing to his eyes.

“I’m sure it does, I think we should get it checked out at A and E, I dont want to put the wrong cream on it and make it worse.”

Nick began to protest but one look at his angry hand words died on his lips. “Ok,” he agreed quietly. “Right Charlie, can you grab me the cling film from the second drawer down there,” Sarah pointed at the kitchen drawers next to the oven. Charlie quickly found it and handed it over. Sarah turned off the water and let Nick’s sore hand drip dry over the sink. Nick hissed with pain and squeezed his eyes shut. “Ok, Nicky I’m going to very gently lay the cling film over your hand to keep it nice and clean on the way to the hospital. I’ll be as careful as I can but it might be a bit sore.” She tore off a large piece and slowly placed it over his hand.

“Owww,” Nick was trying so hard to hold it together but it really hurt. He felt Charlie’s hand on his shoulder trying desperately to comfort him. “Ok, that will do, let’s get you in the car. Charlie do you want to come with us or shall we drop you off on the way?” Charlie glanced at the clock. 7.05 he still had a couple of hours before he needed to be home. And god, if his parents didn’t understand that this was an emergency then he was willing to have that row with them later. “Erm, I’ll come too please Sarah, if you don’t mind. I want to make sure he’s ok.”

Sarah gave him a soft smile. “ Of course. Grab my bag for me will you and let’s get going.“ Sarah held on to Nick’s right arm and gently ushered him to the door. He was still shaking and his face was clammy. She was worried he was going into shock so she tried to keep her voice calm as she spoke. Charlie opened the car door and Nick sat down gingerly, desperately trying to avoid anything touching his hand. Nick slumped his head against the car window as he felt Charlie clicking his seatbelt on. This was not how he expected the day to go. He was so excited to have an evening with Charlie, to cook for him and care for him. And now look where they were. Heading to hospital because Nick was an idiot who couldn’t drain pasta.

Sarah drove as quickly as she legally could. She knew she had to get to the hospital quickly but was also aware that breaking numerous speed limits was not the way.  She kept glancing back at Nick through the mirror. His face had gone chalk white which was definitely an indicator that he had gone in to shock. She could hear Charlie talking to Nick and trying to keep him calm which was comforting. She took a swift right turn as she pulled into the A&E entrances of the hospital. She quickly parked up, not even caring that she wasn’t in a straight line. She had to get Nick inside, immediately.   As soon as they got inside Sarah approached the reception “Hello, Yes my son has badly scalded his hand with boiling water.” The receptionist handed over a piece of paper on a clipboard asking the basic required infomraion. “If you could please fill this out and and then take a seat in the waiting room-“ she was abruptly cut off by Sarah. “No!” She said firmly “He needs to be seen now.” She snapped, trying not to sound rude but hopeful that the receptionist would take notice of the urgency in her voice and the fact that Nick looked ready to keel over any minute now as he stood their, cradling his injured hand and leaning on to Charlie to stop himself from crashing to the floor. “I think he’s going in to shock.”  Sarah exclaimed as she messily scribbled down Nick’s full name and date of birth down on the clipboard. The receptionist took a proper look at Nick before paging  for a nurse.

It wasn’t long before Nick was whisked into a little side room, an oxygen mask was placed over his mouth and nose to help him breathe. Charlie and Sarah insisted on staying with Nick but they kept out of the way in the corner so that they weren’t interfering.  Nick let out a little gasp as he felt the prick of something sharp on the back of his un-injured hand as she nurse inserted an IV line.  Nick felt completely overwhelmed and over stimulated. This was not how he pictured his anniversary evening going.  Everything had happened so fast. He felt scared. He was in pain and he didn’t know what was going on.  He tried to rip the oxygen mask away from his face as he felt it was making things worse. He felt claustrophobic with it on. The nurse gently scolded him and replaced the mask again despite the teenagers struggle.   

“You need to keep it on, Nicky.” Sarah soothed. “It will start to help you breathe a little easier.”  She then turned to the doctor. “Can’t you give him anything for the pain?” She asked desperately. Seeing Nick in agony was breaking her heart. The doctor wasted no time before administering a syringe of clear liquid in to Nick’s IV. They wouldn’t be able to assess or treat his burn until they got his breathing and the pain under control. 

Charlie watched on in horror. He couldn’t believe this had happened. It was all his fault for distracting Nick when he could clearly see he was working with a pot full of boiling water. He was so stupid. Making flirty comments like that when he could clearly see Nick was busy and now he had landed his boyfriend in hospital. What if Nick ended up permanently scarred? It looked like a pretty serious burn and the fact that it had blistered up so quickly. He felt so guilty.  Nick probably hates him now, not that he could blame him. He was starting to hate himself. 

It felt like ages had passed before Nick had started to calm down properly and his breathing had regulated enough for them to withdraw the oxygen.   “Ok then Nicholas!” The middle aged male doctor announced.  “Let’s have a look at his hand then, shall we?” He said as he put on some gloves.  Nick’s eyes widened. He didn’t want anyone poking around and messing with his poorly hand. The morphine that they had administered 15 minutes ago had barely touched the edge. His hand still felt like it was on fire.  He looked up at Sarah with pleading eyes. He was so so scared. He hated hospitals.

“It’s ok Nicky,” Sarah kept her voice calm despite feeling completely out of control. She knew she needed to be the calm one. If she showed signs of panic there’s no way Nick would allow the doctor anywhere near his hand. She also knew the next part of the examination was going to be really painful and her heart broke for her boy who suddenly looked a lot younger than his 17 years. His bottom lip was wobbling and there were tears coming down his cheeks. “Just let the doctor have a look. You will feel so much better once it’s out of the cling film and bandaged up properly.

Nick was not convinced at all and had half a mind to just refuse. To get up off the bed and go home. But he knew, deep down that he needed to get it seen to. He looked over at Charlie who for some ridiculous reason looked like he was full of guilt for the whole situation. How on earth he could think he was to blame? This was all Nick’s stupid fault for not paying attention. He was not going to give Charlie any more reason to feel guilty, so he took a deep breath, readied himself and held out his arm carefully for the doctor to examine.

“Excellent, there’s a good lad,” the doctor remarked. Bringing his chair over and sitting next to the bed. Sarah immediately took her place on the other side of the bed and gripped Nick’s hand, being mindful of the IV line. “Ok Nick, I’m going to remove the cling film and have a look at what we are working with, ok?” Nick gave a tiny nod of consent and buried his head in his mum’s shoulder. He did not want to watch this part. The doctor took the surgical scissors and carefully removed the loose cling film. As he peeled away the layers, Sarah’s eyes immediately focused on Nick’s injured hand. Thankfully she wasn’t squeamish at all, but the sight of his red and blistered hand brought a lump to her throat. It just looked really really sore. She looked over at the doctor who was carefully moving Nick’s arm to get a good look at the injury.

Nick whimpered quietly. Charlie just desperately wanted to comfort him but he was aware that if he drew attention to himself he’d probably be asked to leave the room so he stayed still against the wall watching anxiously.

“Right,” the doctor broke the silence. “The good news is this appears to only be a surface level burn, which should heal up nicely in time with minimal to no scarring.” Nick raised his head from his mum’s shoulder. “Really?” He asked, his eyes hopeful. He glanced at his hand and then looked away quickly. It did not look surface level to him! “Yes,” the Doctor reassured him. “I know it looks bad but the burns don’t go too deep. However we are going to need to clean the area thoroughly before applying a dressing and I’m a bit concerned about the size of one or two of the blisters. I would recommend aspirating those ones before dressing the area. Otherwise they may well burst inside the bandage.

“What does that mean….aspirating?” asked a curious Sarah who wasn’t familiar with the medical jargon. “It is a small procedure where we insert a thin needle into the blister to allow the liquid inside to drain out. We prefer to leave blisters to go down by themselves, but the size of these few here are too big to safely leave.” Nick shook his head and a cry escaped him. Cleaning the burn? Basically stabbing his blisters with a needle? That all sounded extremely painful. He felt his heart rate climbing as panic set in. This was all a nightmare. He closed his eyes. Surely he would wake up soon and find it was all a horrible dream.

Charlie couldn’t stand by any longer and watch his boyfriend having what looked like the beginnings of a panic attack. He stepped towards the bed and stood next to Sarah, rubbing Nick’s shoulder. “Hey, Nick….look at me,” he whispered. Nick opened his eyes and saw Charlie looking at him, his eyes full of compassion. “I know this is so scary and it hurts so much but you have to let the doctors do this, Otherwise it could get infected and then it will be even worse. We will be here the whole time, your mum and me. You can do this.”

Nick glanced from his mum to Charlie. He knew he was right. He worked on slowing his breathing down, then gave a small nod to the doctor who immediately gestured to the nurse to gather the equipment needed.
“I’m going to give you a little something in your IV just to calm you down a bit. The morphine should have kicked in a bit but I’m afraid this is going to be sore.” The nurse injected another clear syringe of liquid into his IV and Nick felt an immediate head rush. He laid his head back against the pillow and closed his eyes. He most definitely was  not watching this part! “I’m so proud of you Nicky,” came his mums teary voice.

“Me too,” whispered Charlie. He could feel both of them near him, holding his hand and rubbing his shoulder gently. That along with whatever magic they had injected him with calmed him down. He felt floaty and fuzzy. The next half an hour was not pleasant for any of them. The doctor expertly cleaned the wound and aspirated 3 of the larger blisters. Nick gripped his mum’s hand tightly and let the tears roll down his face. He listened to the quiet voice of Charlie who gave him a steady stream of comfort. Finally after what felt like forever the doctor began to bandage up his hand. “You have been so brave Nick,” Charlie was in awe of his boyfriend, who was now calm, quiet and still, apart from the odd wince when the doctor moved his hand. “I’m so proud of you.”

“Right, that should do it.” The doctor exclaimed. “Nicholas you did really well, just relax for me while I go through the after care with your mum.” Sarah gave his good hand a double squeeze and let go. “Be right back baby. You just rest for a minute.” She kissed the top of his head and followed the doctor over to the desk area where he was sorting out a pain relief prescription and list of instructions for Nick.

Charlie immediately grabbed Nick’s hand. “You were amazing,” he kissed Nick gently on the lips, “My hero. I don’t know how you did that without making a sound. Total badass.” Nick gave him a small grin. “I think these drugs have made me a bit high to be honest. I feel so floaty!” Charlie chuckled, then his face turned serious. “I am so sorry Nick this was all my fault!”

Nick looked at Charlie as if he had just grown another head.  “What on earth have you got to be sorry for?” He asked completely confused. Charlie hadn’t done anything wrong.  “It’s my fault you scalded yourself.” Charlie said guiltily as he looked down at the floor. This has been all his stupid fault that had lead Nick to have to go through this painful ordeal. “Char…No!” Nick replied firmly as he reached his good hand out and brushed it against Charlie’s hand.  “You didn’t do anything wrong.”  He tried to assure his boyfriend.   “I…I distracted you when you were holding a pan of boiling water.” Charlie sighed. “I should’ve know that wasn’t going to end well.”   

Nick sighed. Charlie looked completely guilt stricken and traumatised with the way that the evenings events had unfolded.  “Well I should have put the pot down on the side before turning around and pretending to be Gordon flipping Ramsay.” He replied, trying his best attempt to try and lighten up the mood a little. He was sure he could see the corners of Charlies mouth twitch a little. 

“It was an accident, Char.” He attempted again as he gave his boyfriends hand a gentle squeeze. He didn’t want Charlie blaming himself for what had happened. It had been an accident and the night could have easily ended the other way around with Charlie being the one admitted to Accident and Emergency. Nick counted his lucky stars that was not the case as he really didn’t think he would be able to cope seeing Charlie injured and in pain.

 “But look at your hand.” Charlie sighed as his gaze fell upon Nick’s left hand that was now dressed and wrapped in a thick white bandage and medical tape.   “It’s still attached.” Nick replied as he held it out in front of his face, being careful not to be too rough as his hand was still very much really tender and sore.  “Please don’t blame yourself.” He sighed. “You heard the doctor. It’s going to heal fine…I won’t even have a badass scar to prove how much of a klutz I am.” He chuckled, satisfied with himself when he saw Charlie struggle to contain laughing out loud. “Yeah, It’s not the idea anniversary but we still got to spend the evening together.” He reminded Charlie.  “Nicholas Nelson ever the romantic.” Charlie rolled his eyes causing Nick to snort.

“Okay!” Sarah announced returned back in to view, brandishing some burn after care pamphlets and a prescription for pain relief tablets. “The nurse is just going to come along in a few minutes and remove your IV and then we can go home.” She told them as she reached out and smoothed Nick’s fringe back with her fingers. Nick just nodded, desperate to get out of this place. He hated everything about hospitals. The bright lights, the smell. Oh that sterile smell that churned his stomach and just how noisy and busy they always tended to be. The nurse did indeed swing by and remove Nick’s IV line which he was less impressed about but it admittedly didn’t hurt as much as it did putting it in and Charlie gripping his hand made it all better.  He was so ready to go home.  Sarah helped Nick slip his coat on, being as gentle as she could not to nudge his bandaged up hand.  “Shall we?’ Charlie grinned as he held out his hand. “Let’s go.” Nick smiled as he accepted his boyfriends outstretched hand. “I’m starving.” He announced as he felt his stomach rumble.   “I thought you might say that.’ Sarah laughed as she followed closely behind them towards the exit.  “How about we stop by McDonalds on the way home??” She suggested, holding back a smile as Nick spun around, his eyes lighting up like a Christmas tree.   “I know it isn’t much of an Anniversary meal but it’s my treat.” She smiled.  “Thanks mum!” Nick grinned. Charlie flashed her a warm smile.  That actually sounded really good right now.  “That would be lovely, Sarah.” He agreed. “Thank you.”

So that was it settled. They made their way back to the car, picking Nick’s prescription up on the way to McDonalds. It wasn’t the anniversary meal that they had planned but they were together and that was all that mattered.

Chapter Text

Nick couldn’t wait to get home. He loved rugby with all his heart but today’s practice had really taken it out of him. Usually playing rugby in the pouring rain didn’t bother him at all, he normally quite enjoyed it, actually, but not today. He towel dried his hair, said goodbye to Charlie who was in a rush to catch the bus as his parents were going out for the evening and he had to watch Ollie for the night. That shouldn’t be hard as the 6 year old had just recovered from Chicken Pox and would most likely want to spend the evening eating snacks and watching movies with his older siblings. Nick  wrapped his soaked kit up in his towel and stuffed it into his gym bag and sighed as he pulled his hoody on over his head, desperate for the warmth. The cold normally didn’t bother him but he felt chilled to the bone and a little achey to be perfectly honest but he just put it down to rough practice in the rain.  He just wanted to get home, hop into a warm shower and crawl in to bed with Nellie by his side. He felt exhausted.  Nick strolled through the empty carpark until he came across his mums car, parked in the normal parking space. He smiled softly to himself. He’d be home soon enough. 

Sarah glanced at Nick and studied his face as she slowed down at a red light. Normally Nick would engage in conversational chatter as soon as he got into the car. He always filled her in on his day and she enjoyed listening but today he was unusually quiet.   “You okay Nicky?” She asked “You’re awfully quiet, sweetheart.”   Nick glanced up at his mum and nodded quickly. He knew she’d only worry if he was truthful about how he was feeling.    “Yeah.” He flashed her a smile. “Just tired.”   Sarah frowned as she glanced sideways at him again. “You’re not coming down with anything, are you?” her voice was layered with concern. She reached out to feel his check for a temperature, but he retreated.  Nick quickly shook his head.  “No. I’m just really tired.” He repeated as he bent down to stroke Nellie who was nestled at the foot well.  Sarah more or less always brought her on the school pickups.  Sarah just hummed in response, not entirely satisfied with Nick’s reply but deciding not to push, either.  “Okay. Sounds like dinner and an early night kind of evening, then?”   “Mh-m.” Nick muttered in response. The thought of slipping on warm pjs and crawling in to his bed sounded delightful. He wasn’t even bothered about dinner. He didn’t feel like he had much of appetite but he also knew if he didn’t at least try to eat then it would spark even more suspicion and concern from Sarah so he would at least try and eat whatever was put down in front of him.   

Nick headed straight for the shower as soon as they got home. He stood under the water hoping and praying for it to take the aches away from his muscles. This felt different to the normal aches and pains he sometimes felt after rugby. He just felt run down, achey and so so exhausted. Sarah’s voice from earlier echoed in his mind. He really hoped he wasn’t coming down with something. He hated being ill.    He turned the water off and stepped outside the shower. Quickly wrapping his towel around him as the cold instantly hit his skin. He wasted no time at all in drying off quickly and pulling on Pyjamas bottoms and a thick jumper before sliding under his covers.  He heard a knock at the door before Sarah entered.  “Nicky? I’ve just stuck some pizzas in the oven do you-..” she stopped in her tracks as she noticed Nick had gotten in to bed. 

“Nick? Did you hear what I said? Pizzas in the oven,” she looked over at the Nick shaped lump in the bed, “Darling are you ok? It’s very early to be in bed already.” She sat down at the end of his bed.
Nick groaned and pulled himself to a sitting position. “I’m just really tired,” he grumbled. “I’m not really very hungry, I think I just need to go to sleep.” Sarah looked at him with concern. Nick normally ate like a horse and she had trouble keeping the kitchen cupboards stocked up with snacks. To miss a meal entirely was completely unheard of. She studied his face, he looked pale and worn out. Maybe he had been pushing himself too hard with rugby and his studies. She decided not to push him to come downstairs and eat. Missing one meal wasn’t going to hurt him.
“Ok baby,” she smoothed his hair and gave his shoulder a squeeze. “I’ll cook the pizza anyway and pop it in the fridge. If you get hungry later just come and grab it ok? And maybe have the day off school tomorrow if you still feel like this. It’s important to look after yourself.”

“Thanks mum,” Nick shuffled back down into bed and pulled his duvet up to his chin. “You’re the best.” Sarah left the room quietly and closed the door. She didn’t want Nellie jumping on his bed and disturbing him later. Hopefully after a long sleep he’d be feeling right as rain.

Nick did not feel right as rain when he woke up the next morning. He switched off his alarm and hauled himself out of bed. His body felt heavy and he had a pounding headache. He went through the motions of getting ready for school pretty much with his eyes closed. He knew his mum would be happy for him to stay home and rest but he didn’t want to miss the biology test today. His teacher would only make him resit it another time and that was just a hassle. As he showered he scratched a spot on his lower back, sneezed a bunch of times and rested his head against the tiles letting the steam ease his congested nose. A cold. Brilliant. After getting dressed he stumbled down the stairs in search of some cold and flu medicine to get him through the day. His mum was sitting at the kitchen table, two mugs of hot tea ready in front of her. She eyed him suspiciously as he began searching the cupboards.

 “How are you feeling today baby? You still look a bit peaky.”

“I think I have a cold,” Nick finally located the medicine and sat down at the table, scratching his forearm absent mindedly. Sarah watched as he popped the tablets in his mouth, swallowing them down with his tea.
“Do you think you have a fever?” She leaned across and lifted his fringe up off his head, ready to feel his temperature with the back of her hand. “Oh!” She pulled her hand back and looked at Nick, realisation dawning on her quickly. “Erm, Nick darling….”

He looked up at her over his mug, “When you said last week you’d been helping to look after Charlie’s poorly little brother, I don’t remember you saying what was wrong with him?” Nick looked puzzled, “Oh he had chicken pox. Poor kid was covered in spots…. What?” He saw the soft smile on his mum’s face. “Mum, what? Why do you ask.”

Sarah sighed, this was going to go down like a lead balloon. “Nick, I think you have chicken pox.” Nick coughed as his tea went down the wrong way. “I can’t! That’s a kids disease! I had it when I was little remember? You can’t get it twice.”
Sarah picked up her phone and put it in the selfie camera mode. She passed it over to Nick. “See those little blisters on your forehead? That’s chicken pox. And no darling you haven’t had it before. David did when he was 7 but you never caught it.” Nick looked at his forehead in horror. Chicken pox! At his age!

“Oh my god,” he banged his head down on the table. “I can’t believe I didn’t know that. I spent all that time at Charlie’s because I thought I was immune…..” he sighed deeply. Sarah ruffled his hair fondly. “I’m sorry sweetheart, I didn’t even think to ask you what was up with Ollie. At least you can finally get it out of the way! I’ll phone in school, you won’t be in for a few days whilst you are contagious.” She got up from the table and phoned Truham, while Nick stayed at the table with his head in his hands. He couldn’t believe it. Everyone got chicken pox when they were little, why the hell didn’t he? He’d heard it can be really painful when you were older. He scratched his arm again.

“I saw that!” Scolded Sarah..”You mustn’t scratch it Nick, you don’t want to scar.”
“Sorry,” Nick said sheepishly, “ I didn’t even realise I was.” Now that his mum had told him it was chicken pox he was suddenly acutely aware of tiny little itches in different parts on his body. He clenched his fists in an attempt to distract  himself. His phone buzzed next to him. He saw Charlie’s message flash up on his Lock Screen.

Charlie: hey, I’m on the bus. Meet me at the bus stop?
Nick picked up his phone and typed out a reply.
Nick: Hi love…you won’t believe this. I’m at home. Apparently it turns out I didn’t have chicken pox as a child. Only David did.
He watched as Charlie read his message and replied.
Charlie: oh my god you are kidding me??? You said you’d had it! You shouldn’t have come over last week! Are you ok?

Nick smiled softly, he didn’t want Charlie to worry about him, and actually so far apart from feeling like he had a bad cold, he didn’t actually feel too bad.

Nick: I’m fine, a bit itchy and I have a cold. I won’t be in school this week though. I miss you already.
Charlie: aww I will miss you too baby. Can I come over after school?
Nick: yes please! Can you let Coach Singh know I won’t be at rugby for a bit?
Charlie: of course. Need me to pick up any work or anything for you?
Nick: I don’t think so, I’ll email my teachers. Love you xx
Charlie: love you too xxxxxxxx

Nick put his phone down with a smile. At least he only had to last the day before Charlie came over to keep him company. He decided to make a fresh cup of tea for himself and Sarah, then he went back up to his room to change out of his school uniform and into comfy pjs. As he undressed he noticed quite a few tiny little red dots appearing on his body. They didn’t look too bad but he knew once they blistered it was going to be really itchy. He looked at his face in the mirror. There were some little spots he hadn’t noticed in the bathroom earlier. Nick wasn’t particularly vain but he liked to make a bit of an effort with his appearance. He sighed at the thought of how bad he was going to look once they all blistered. He just had to make sure he didn’t scratch. No matter how much it itched! He left his uniform on the floor and went back downstairs.

“Ah there’s my little patient.” Sarah smiled as he re-entered the living room just as Sarah placed a tray on the coffee table.  “The perfect sick day breakfast.” She grinned. Nick’s eyes fell on the contents of the tray. Buttered toast. His favourite, a bowl of fruit and a glass of orange juice. Nick flopped down on the couch smiling fondly as Nellie hopped up next to him. He ruffled her fur and couldn’t help but chuckle at the confused look she gave him. “I know, girl,” he rolled his eyes. “I know.”   He picked up his glass of juice and took a large sip. He passed on the toast and picked at the fruit. He didn’t have much of an appetite.  Sarah disappeared into to the kitchen and returned a few moments later holding a little digital thermometer in her hand.   Nick scowled which caused Sarah to laugh fondly.  “Open up.” She instructed.  Nick sighed but reluctantly opened his mouth and allowed Sarah to slip the thermometer under his tongue. 

 Nick folded his arms across his chest. He couldn’t believe this. Chicken pox?? At sixteen!!! His mates were defitnely going to take the piss out of him for this. Christian, Sai and Otis for sure would never let him live this down.  He just assumed he had gotten the chicken pox as a little kid like most normal kids. Obviously not. How naive of him.  Charlie was bound to think he was completely lame.  His train of thoughts were interrupted by the beeping of the thermometer.   “Your face will stay like that if you keep scowling.” Sarah smirked as she removed the thermometer and gazed at the reading, she tutted as she placed it down on the wide.  38.3°C. “Yes, definitely a fever.” She sighed.   “I’ll nip out later and pick you up some calamine lotion.” She told him. “It’ll help when the itching gets worse.”   Nick glared at her. “Worse? It’s going to get worse?” He exclaimed and there was him thinking this was bad enough.   “Oh, baby!” Sarah giggled as she kissed his cheek.    She then went to make a start on some household chores after ensuring Nick was content.  Nick flopped leaned back on the sofa as she grabbed the remote from the side and turned the TV on. He needed a distraction to stop him wanting to claw at the forming blisters on his body. He then felt very sorry for little Oliver. This must’ve been hell for him. Feeling poorly and itchy and just plain yucky in general.  He lifted his phone up from the side and glanced at his messages. 

Charlie: I still can’t believe you’ve caught the pox from Olly🤣😅

Otis: Mate?? Is is true you have the chicken pox?

Christian: yo Nick! What are you, six?? I thought only little kids caught chicken pox🙈

Sai: You couldn’t have thought of a better excuse to get out of rugby drills??

Nick rolled his eyes. He was going to kill Charlie. He was probably the laughing stock of Truham by now and if that wasn’t bad enough, he was now starting to get messages from the Paris squad group chat. Nick groaned as he scrolled down. 

Darcy: NICHOLAS??? have you really got the chicken pox 🐔
Tao: WHAT????
Darcy: Imogen just told me…
Tao: Nelson??
Tara: No way!!! Nick? Are you alright??
Tao: isn’t that a kids illness?
Elle: anyone can get chicken pox🙃
Tao: yes, but most normal people have had it before the ages of 8
Darcy: clearly not Nick😅
Charlie: guys!! Don’t be mean🥺 Nick’s probably going to kill me as it is just for telling you guys
Imogen: and Sai, Otis and Chris🤣🤣 who told me
Charlie:🤦🏻‍♂️

Nick couldn’t help the small smile that crept on to his face, even thought he wasn’t best pleased that all of his friends were taking the absolute mick out of him. He couldn’t help but laugh along at their comments.  He quickly typed up a response to their group chat. 

Nick: Hello! Yes it’s me and yes I have the chicken pox (apparently🙄) so mum says anyway and yes I caught it from Olly!! and yes Charlie I am SO going to kill you🤣🤣

Chuckling quietly to himself, Nick tossed his phone on the sofa next to him and opened up Disney plus on the tv. Might as well settle in for a Marvel movie marathon! At least there were some perks to being off school! Nick spent the remainder of the day slouched on the sofa watching movies. He was finding it harder and harder to ignore the growing itchiness all over his body. The spots seemed to be multiplying by the second.

Sarah had returned with some calamine lotion, which to be honest didn’t even begin to stop the itching. She had picked up his favourite snacks from the shops to try and cheer him up but he just wasn’t hungry. He hadn’t expected chicken pox to make him feel so crappy. He kept looking at his face in the mirror. There were so many spots. He looked just awful. Everyone at school was going to laugh at him so much when he went back. Charlie was going to think he looked hideous. He wished he could keep himself hidden away like the beast from Beauty and the Beast. He briefly wondered if he’d be able to wear a Covid mask….but that would probably look weird. Nellie was curled up at his feet on the sofa, he could feel her glaring at him every time he shifted position to try and subtly scratch an itch. Her ears pricked up as the doorbell went. She jumped down and trotted to the front door, tail wagging.

Nick smiled, “You know it’s Charlie don’t you girl?” He eased himself off the sofa and headed to the door, bracing himself for Charlie seeing his spotty face for the first time. He felt surprisingly vulnerable about it. He opened the door quickly and ushered Charlie through to the lounge, keeping his head down as he did.
“Erm, babe? What are you doing?” Came Charlie’s indignant voice. “Why aren’t you looking at me? Where’s my kiss?”
“I look horrible,” Nick sighed, eyes firmly on the carpet below him. “You won’t want to kiss me looking like this.” Charlie’s face softened. He felt a bit bad for all the teasing his friends had been doing to Nick throughout the day.

“Hey,” Charlie moved closer to Nick, his hand under his chin. He lifted Nicks head up so he couldn’t avoid making eye contact. “Babe, I don’t care if you are covered in spots. Or if you turned orange. Or if you were covered in hair. You are the most beautiful person in the whole world and i will always want kiss you.” Nicks eyes softened and he took a step back so that Charlie could see him in all his spotty glory. He searched his face for any look of disgust but found only the usual love looking back at him. “I know I’m being stupid..” Nick groaned. Charlie looked at him carefully. He still looked hot, even with all the spots. He’d definitely take the piss out of him for being so vain once he was all healed up but right now he could see that Nick just needed a bit of reassurance.
“Sorry we all teased you so much for getting the pox,” he smiled softly at Nick. “You know we were only joking right?”
“Yeah course I do, I just got in my head a bit about everyone seeing me like this.” His phone chimed on the table and he read the message, frowning. “oh for fucks sake, his timing is impeccable as always.” Nick showed him his phone where there was a message from David.

David : oh my god, mum just told me you have chicken pox. You really are such a baby! Send me a picture so I can laugh at how stupid you look!!

“Just ignore him,” Charlie soothed. “ How’s the itching? You doing ok? Mum gave me this gel that she used on Ollie. Apparently it’s much more effective than calamine lotion.” Nick took the tube and immediately applied some to the spots on his face. “Tell her thanks,” he said softly. “The itching is driving me nuts!” Charlie grimaced in sympathy. He needed to distract Nick so that he could forget about the itching for a bit. “Come on,” he said. “Let’s grab a drink and I’ll fill you in on all the gossip you missed today. For starters did you hear the hot rugby captain has come down with the plague?” Nick glared at him. “Oy. Too soon!” He laughed as he followed Charlie through to the kitchen. He felt better already.

Chapter Text

Charlie chewed the end of his pencil as he worked on the maths equation in front of him. He had almost solved it. Just one more step and then his maths homework was complete and he could forget about school for the weekend. It was Friday evening, he wouldn’t usually be doing his homework on a Friday night but he and Nick had plans most of the weekend so he decided to get it out of the way. 

Just as he could see the answer to the problem forming in his head, there was a gentle knock at the door and his mum appeared. “Charlie? I need a minute with you,” her voice was softer than normal, not that that registered with Charlie. He huffed in frustration, “ Could you wait five minutes, I’m so close to being done with this stupid algebra!”  He said in frustration. “I’m sorry Charlie, this really can’t wait.”  Charlie then noticed the fact that her voice was shaking slightly and he eyed her cautiously as she sat down on his bed. 

“Mum, what is it? What’s wrong?” Jane held her hands out to Charlie and he left his desk to come and sit next to her. “Mum you are scaring me. Has something happened to Nan? Or Granddad?” He studied his mum’s face for any answers. 

“No darling, they are both fine. Umm….” She struggled to find the words, which made Charlie’s heart race even faster. “I..um just got off the phone with Sarah. There’s been an accident….” Charlie felt a shock go through his body, “An accident? What sort of accident? Mum, tell me what’s going on?” Jane took a shaky breath and focused on rubbing Charlie’s hands in hers. “I don’t know all the details. There was a car accident, Sarah and Nick were in their car, Nick was driving…” 

Charlie felt his blood run cold, “Sarah said a car driving the other way just veered into their lane and crashed straight into them.”

“Oh my god!” Charlie leapt up off the bed and started pacing, “but they are ok right? You were on the phone with Sarah, can I talk to Nick?” At this Jane broke down and started to cry. Charlie looked at her in horror. “Mum? What aren’t you telling me?”

Jane choked down a sob and looked at Charlie, “He’s been taken to hospital. Sarah didn’t tell me the details but his side of the car took virtually the whole impact. He’s unconscious Charlie,” Jane pulled him into a hug. “The doctors have told her he’s in a critical condition.”  Charlie felt his body go completely numb. Nick. The boy he was completely in love with was unconscious. How badly was he hurt? Was he going to be ok?  His heart started racing really quickly.  

“We need to go!!” Charlie said frantically. He couldn’t stay here another second, not knowing how Nick was. What condition he was in. Was he even alive? He swallowed a lump in his throat. He couldn’t bare to think of that.   “Put a jacket on love, I’ll get my keys.”  Jane told him. Charlie just blinked up at her as he had been 99% sure she was going to say no and tell him to stay put.  Normally that would be Jane’s approach but having just spoken to a distraught Sarah on the phone, she knew she needed the company just as much as Charlie needed to be there for them both.  Charlie grabbed his coat from the back of the door before swinging the door open, deparate to get in to the car and to the hospital. He nearly jumped through the ceiling when he saw Tori stood there.  “Jesus Tori!” He squealed. She really needed to stop just appearing out of thin air especially at times like this.

“What’s going on??” Tori asked glancing suspiciously between her mother and brother. She knew something was up. She could tell by the teary look in Charlie’s eyes and the fact that Jane had been crying. She very rarely cried. Which meant something had happened.  “It’s…it’s Nick.” Charlie sobbed.  Tori’s eyes widened. What had happened?  “What about Nick?” She asked suddenly feeling very unnerved.  Surely Charlie wouldn’t be in this state over a falling out? no. This was much more than that.  Charlie glanced at his mum. He couldn’t say it. He didn’t want to say it because he didn’t want to believe that this was actually happening, but it was. Nick had been in a terrible accident and he didn’t even know how bad it was but from the state his mum had been in after speaking to Sarah….Jane glanced at her daughter.  “Nick’s been in a serious car accident…”  she explained, watching as the colour drained from her daughter’s normally pale face.  “He’s been rushed to hospital. Sarah called..” Jane continued.  Tori was in shock. She glanced at Charlie, no wonder he was in bits.  “He’s going to be okay though, yeah?” Tori asked.  Not Nick. Nick was sweet and kind and he treated Charlie exactly like he deserved to be treated.   “I…I don’t know.” Jane said honestly.  She didn’t know, at all. She did know the severity of the collision though and it didn’t seem good.   “We’re going to go to the hospital.” Jane explained.  “I need you to give Oliver his bath and put him to bed for me.” She said glancing at Tori.  Tori just nodded. She knew it must be serious for Jane to be rushing out during Olly’s bedtime.  “Let me know how Nick is, please.” She said. He needed to be alright. He was Nick Nelson. Rugby King. Nothing could defeat him, right?? 

🍂🍂🍂🍂 Earlier that evening….🍂🍂

Nick clicked his seatbelt on and adjusted the seat position on the driver’s seat. His mum really was very small he chuckled to himself, earning a glare from Sarah as she slipped into the passenger seat next to him. “Any comments about my height and you won’t be driving my car mister! Not everyone can be a giant like you!” She glared at him, then broke into a grin. 

“Sorry mum. It just always makes me laugh how close you have the seat to the steering wheel!!” Nick checked his mirrors, started the car and reversed carefully out the driveway. He’d only passed his test a few weeks ago and loved any opportunity to drive so when his mum had said she needed to pop out to the big Tesco on the edge of town he was more than happy to tag along and drive her there. The fact he got to help choose the snacks for the upcoming week was an added bonus.

Nick drove through town and onto the main road leading up to the out of town shops. He checked his speed, he was doing bang on the 40mph limit. Sarah was happily choosing music from her phone to play in the car and they chatted casually. 

Suddenly, without any warning, the car in the oncoming lane lurched across directly in front of their car. It seemed to be going too fast. Nick instinctively slammed on the brakes and muttered a panicked “shit” under his breath as he tried to steer the car to the left to avoid it but there just wasn’t time. Sarah screamed loudly. The car hit them hard on the drivers side, sending their car spinning round, shunted by the car behind. The next few moments were a blur as the car finally came to a stop. 

Sarah’s head hurt, she could feel bits of broken glass all over her from the windscreen. Her chest was screaming in pain from the seatbelt. But she was ok. The passenger airbag had deployed and now lay flat in front of her. She couldn’t believe what had just happened. She looked across to Nick to check that he was ok too and her heart stopped. The front drivers side of the car had been badly hit and Nick’s head was resting on the steering wheel in front of him. There was blood coming from a large gash in his forehead, his eyes were closed, his body completely limp. She gasped in horror as she realised that Nick’s airbag had failed to deploy. 

“Nicky?” Sarah gently touched his shoulder. Then a little louder, “Nick? Baby, open your eyes.” Nick stayed completely still. Sarah began to scream for help. She needed to get her baby out of the car. People appeared from all sides of the car. She heard snippets of conversations 

“The ambulance is on the way”

“Don’t try to move him”

“I think he’s breathing,”

She kept her focus on Nick, gripping his hand tightly and begging him to wake up. 

After what felt like the longest time she heard sirens approaching. The paramedics took charge of the situation, coaxing Sarah out of the car, promising her that Nick was in good hands. She refused to go in the ambulance until they’d got Nick out of the car too. So they put a blanket around her and let her stay, confident she didn’t have a serious injuries to worry about. 

Sarah watched as the fire brigade carefully cut him out of the car and he was laid down on the trolley. His head had been stabilised by a neck brace and he had an oxygen mask on his face. He had been lay down on a spinal board as the paramedics didn’t know the severity of his injuries. So they had to take all precautions. “Nick, I’m here darling,” she gently held his hand as the paramedics prepared to take him into the ambulance. 

She glanced over at the second ambulance where she saw another person being checked over. She assumed him to be the driver of the other car. The car that had been driving on the wrong side of the road. The car that had smashed in to them at a dangerous speed. The police were there too, trying to ask him questions. 

Sarah returned her attention to Nick, climbing into the back of the ambulance with him. It wasn’t far to the nearest hospital, and with their sirens blaring and lights flashing, they were there quickly. 

Sarah raced through the double doors of the hospital that led to resus. She refused to leave Nick’s side as the rushed through the corridors. She could hear the paramedics speaking to the doctors but she didn’t understand a word of their medical jargon that they were exchanging.  But she knew it was serious and then she heard the words that no mother should ever have to hear.  “We’re losing him!!”  She felt her body go rigid. She couldn’t lose Nick, not her baby. Not her beautiful boy.   “Nicky?? Mums here, baby. I’m here!!” She shrieked as she watched them rush her son over to an empty bay in resus. Watching in desperation as they carefully transported him from the stretcher on to the hospital bed, ensuring that the neck and spinal brace remained in tact. She watched as they practically ripped open his shirt and attached defibrillator pads to his bare chest. The tears streamed down her face. She wanted nothing more than to race forward and grasp her son’s hand tightly, begging him to wake up but she felt herself being held back by a young nurse.  She also knew that she had to let the professionals do their job. 

“Why don’t we go get you a warm cup of tea?” The nurse told her as she rubbed her upper arm comfortingly.  Tea?? How on earth was she supposed to drink tea at a time like this. She didn’t want to tea. She wanted this to all be a nightmare. She glanced at the nurse. She didn’t look all that much older than David. She couldn’t be that long out of medical school.  “I don’t want tea!” Sarah replied firmly. She wasn’t trying to be rude but she couldn’t leave Nick, not now, not ever.  “I can’t leave him. He’s my baby…” she cried. She would point blank refuse to leave the room even if they tried to physically pry her away. She needed to be there for Nick. She needed him to know that she was close. 

“1..2..3 Clear!” She watched as they shocked her son with the metal pads. She watched as his chest jerked and she watched on as they assessed the monitors for any sign that Nick was breathing.   “Come on Nicky.” Sarah whispered as she had to grip on to the kind nurse to steady herself and stop from crashing to the floor. “Breathe darling, you have to breathe!!” 

She watched as they used the defibrillator again.  All she could do was desperately watch on as Nurses and doctors swarmed the bed, injecting her son with all sorts. All she felt was numbness. Her son was being resuscitated in front of her eyes. She watched as the doctors pressed the defibrillator panels against Nick’s chest again, watching his chest rise and fall. Come on, baby.  You can do it.  She could see the doctor glancing between the clock on the wall and Nick. She shook her head.  No, No!   She couldn’t lose him. She just couldn’t.  Please  Nicky. Breathe!! 

Suddenly she heard the heart monitor beep and then a little louder and louder.  “He’s breathing!!” One of the doctors announced as he watched the heart rate monitor spring to life at the bedside.  “We’re going to have to intubate.” another said as he approached the bed holding some medical tubing.  Sarah felt a gasp escape her mouth as she watched on as they intubated her son, but he was alive. He was breathing. He was holding on in there.  

“We’re in.” one of the doctors said as he had successfully managed to thread the tube down Nick’s throat. Sarah grimaced as she watched them perform the life saving procedure. It broke her heart but she also knew that anything they were doing to her son, they were doing it to try and save him.  Sarah felt the nurse put a comforting hand on her shoulder again and she realised how much she was trembling.   “Call down theatre and let them know we’re on our way.” The charge doctor announced as he made sure the portable ventilator was connected properly before raising the bed rail and beginning to manoeuvre the bed towards the door.  “Theatre?? Why does he need surgery?” Sarah asked. Why wasn’t anyone telling her anything.  “Please tell me he’s going to be okay.”  She begged. She needed to know what was going on. She was Nick’s mother. She had the right to know.  “Nicholas is suffering from an intracranial Haemorrhage caused by a serious bleed on the brain..” one of the doctors explained.  “We need to operate immediately!”  Sarah was left standing there stunned as she watched them wheel Nick down the corridors towards the lift.  She wanted to run after them but the nurse held her back.  “Let’s get you that cup of tea, eh?” She said softly.

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Sarahs hands trembled as she tried to take a sip of horribly sweet tea the nurse had given her. She had been taken to a quiet waiting room…..to just wait. After the noise and horror of resus, it was a shock to be so quiet and alone. It had been ages. Her chest hurst, her eyes were so sore from crying. Every time she thought she was running out of tears she would see the image of her beautiful baby boy lying in resus being shocked back to life, and the tears would start again. She’d managed to hold it together to phone David, who was on a lads holiday in Spain and was going to try to get home as quickly as he possibly could. Stephane’s call went to voicemail. Had she expected anything else??

 The phone call to Jane was tough. She didn’t want to worry Charlie but she knew how serious this was and that he needed to be able to come and see him in case……no. She wasn’t going to finish that thought. Nick was strong. A fighter. He’d got himself breathing again. He could get through this. The doctor had sat down with her and explained the surgery Nick was currently having. It terrified her to think of him having major brain surgery. She had been warned that this was a very difficult and complex procedure and that she should “prepare herself” for any possible outcome. 

She was brought out of her thoughts by a soft knock at the door. It opened and she was met with the concerned faces of Jane and Charlie. She took one look at Charlie’s face and burst into tears again.

“I’m sorry,” she grabbed another tissue from the box on the coffee table, “I think I’m in a bit of shock, I just can’t stop crying.”   Charlie looked at Sarah in complete horror. She looked completely broken. He had hoped that he would be able to go and see Nick, but the lady at the reception desk had just directed them to this room. Where was Nick? What was going on?

Jane immediately rushed to Sarah and hugged her. “We just wanted to come and see if there was anything we could do. If there was any news on how he’s doing?” She rubbed Sarah’s back soothingly. “Are you ok?” Sarah collapsed back onto the sofa. “That’s so kind of you.” She saw the look on Charlie’s face. “I’m sorry for being such a mess. I just can’t believe what happened. 

“What did happen?” Charlie found his voice. He was desperate to know what was going on “Is he ok?” His eyes were pleading with her for news and she knew she couldn’t sugar coat what she was about to say. “Come and sit with me darling,” Charlie sat down beside her and she took his hands. “There was a car accident. The car….it just came out of nowhere. Nick tried to avoid it, it wasn’t his fault, but we were hit. The impact was on his side of the car. He was unconscious….the ambulance came and the fire brigade….” Sarah took a breath, studying Charlie’s face and expressions He just looked so small and distraught “Um…the fire brigade cut him out of the car. We got to the hospital quickly but…..” she began to cry again. Charlie’s eyes widened, “He stopped breathing when he arrived and they had to resuscitate him.” 

Jane’s hand flew to her mouth in shock. Tears sprang to Charlie’s eyes as he pleaded with her for some good news.

“They got him back,” Sarah continued, feeling like she has to made the fact that Nick was still alive and clinging on. Oh how she hoped he was, clear. “They’ve rushed him straight to surgery. He has a large bleed on his brain. That was hours ago. I’ve been sat here ever since.” 

Charlie felt like he was about to throw up. His Nick. He had stopped breathing, been technically dead. He was in surgery. He felt his breathing rate picking up and the next thing his mum was sitting with him encouraging him to breathe slowly and follow her breaths.  “Nicky is a fighter Charlie,” Sarah rubbed his shoulder, “ We just need to let the doctors do their work and be patient. “ Charlie gave a small nod. He could see that Sarah was trying to put a positive spin on it for him and he loved her for that. He was also glad she’d told him the truth even though it had shattered him to hear it. 

Time seemed to go more slowly than ever in that small little room. Jane went and found the vending machine, returning with more tea for Sarah and herself and a coke for Charlie. He didn’t want it. He just stared at the clock watching the seconds tick by, imagining what was going on in a theatre somewhere in the building. 

Eventually there was another knock on the door and a weary looking doctor came in. “Sarah Nelson?” He enquired. Sarah looked at him and nodded. “Is he ok?” She pleaded. 

The doctor sat down on the chair opposite her. “We have just finished the surgery on your son. Let me say first of all he is alive,” Sarah let out a relieved sob, Charlie felt like he could breathe again for the first time. “However, the surgery was not easy. Nick’s heart stopped during the procedure but we managed to get it started again. The skull fracture had caused a lot of swelling and bleeding around his brain. We have repaired everything the best we can and he’s now been taken to intensive care to give him time for the swelling to go down before we attempt to wake him up.” 

Sarah looked at him, tears silently pouring down her face. “Is he going to wake up?”

The doctor looked at her kindly. There was no easy way to give news like this to a loved one. “I must be honest with you. Nick is critically ill. Only time will tell if he can recover from this, and if he does there may be damage to his brain. But, he is young, fit and otherwise healthy so he has a chance. Would you like to come and see him?” 

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Sarah shakily took a step in to the room on the Intensive Care Unit. She didn’t know what to expect and her chat with that doctor hadn’t settled her mind, much. ‘ Nicholas is critically ill ’ just kept replaying in her mind.  Her son had just had major brain surgery. This wasn’t supposed to happen. They were supposed to spend the evening browsing the aisles in Tesco, return home with their weekly food shop, order some pizzas and sit down with a movie. 

Their usual Friday night plans but now she was stood here watching her son on life support all because of some irresponsible driver. Car accidents happened but there was no warning. The other driver had just come out of no where.  He had left Nick with no time to respond. 

Nick lay flat on his bed. His head was wrapped in a thick white bandage, but he still seemed to have clumps of blood matted in his hair as it stuck out over the top of the surgical gauze.  There was a ventilator tube sticking out of his mouth, taped in to place with some medical tape and connected to the life support machine that was currently keeping him alive as he was unable to breathe unaided right now. 2 tubes snaked their way around the bed, one carrying blood as Nick had lost a commencing about of blood and needed a transfusion. Machines were positioned at both sides of the bed, beeping in a steady rhythm. Nick’s face was pale and he had dark purpling bruising around both his eyes from where he had smashed his face against the steering wheel upon impact. 

There was a deep gash on his cheek that had been cleaned and stitched up from where the glass had smashed around him, but the most terrifying thing for Sarah was just how still her son was.  No movement. Lifeless. The only sound in the room was the Rhythmic beeping of the machines and the hiss of the ventilator as it pumped life in to her son. Sarah collapsed in to one of the hard plastic seats, not taking her eyes off of Nick. He just looked so fragile. So broken.  She reached out to stroke his arm, ever so gently. Terrified of causing anymore harm or damage to her little boy.  “Oh Nicky…” she cried.  “I’m here. Mums here, my darling boy…”   Her voice was raw and thick of emotion.    

“You can hold his hand if you want.” Sarah whipped her head up in the direction of the voice and smiled solemnly at the kind nurse from earlier who had entered the room to observe the machines. “Just be careful of the equipment…” she smiled softly. She knew how important it was for parents to have that contact with their poorly children. To be able to provide any comfort that they could. She knew it was just as comforting to the parents as it probably was to the patients.  “Thank you.” Sarah replied sincerely as she carefully picked up Nick’s hand up off the mattress and gave it a gentle squeeze, being so careful of the IV and the wires that were connected to her son.   “You’re doing so well, baby..” she soothed as she placed a soft kiss on Nicks hand and squeezed her eyes shut as the tears began to flow again.  She had only ever seen Nick as vulnerable and poorly as this once. She remembered back to just a few days after his first birthday. She remembered how terrified she had been when she had found her youngest son blue and un response in his cot after putting him down for a nap a few hours previously. She remembered being beside herself as herself and Stéphane rushed infant Nick to the hospital. She still to this day wasn’t exactly sure what had happened, all she had known was that little baby Nick had contracted a serious viral infection which had lead to Febrile convulsions.  She had been so lucky that she had checked on Nick when she did. She remembered back to seeing her tiny little baby connected to all different machines as the doctors and nurses rallied around to stabilise him. She remembered saying to herself that she hoped she never had to go through anything like that again…but here she was. 

Sarah was suddenly snapped out of her thoughts by a light tapping on the little glass window of the Intensive care room. She whirled around to see Jane standing there motioning to a police officer.  “I’ll be right back, sweetheart.” She said softly as she placed another gentle kiss on Nick’s hand and placed it back on the mattress before standing up and heading towards the door.

“Ms Nelson?” A young police officer held out his hand and she shook it tentatively. “ I’m very sorry to disturb you, we were hoping to talk to you about the road traffic accident involving your son. We have some news to share with you.”  Sarah looked anxiously behind her at the little window in the door of her son’s room.

“Um, I really don’t want to leave him by himself,” she hesitated. She couldn’t let him stay in that room scared and alone. That wouldn’t be right. She looked over at Charlie, who was looking between her and the police officer. 

“Maybe I could sit with him?” He quietly suggested. Charlie was desperate to see Nick, to see for himself that he was still alive. At the same time he was absolutely terrified at seeing what would be waiting for him behind that closed door if he did. 

Sarah looked over at Jane, to gauge her reaction to the idea. To Charlie’s surprise she agreed with him saying, “ Yes, why doesn’t Charlie sit with him for a few minutes while we talk to the police. Then I’ll take him home as it’s really late.”

Sarah reluctantly agreed to leave Nick, knowing that he would be happy to have Charlie sit with him. The nurse approached Charlie. “Come with me sweetie, is Nick your brother?” She asked kindly as they approached the door of Nick”s room. “Boyfriend,” Charlie whispered. He suddenly worried that he had said the wrong thing and she wouldn’t let him in. But she just smiled and said, “That’s lovely, he’ll be pleased you are here.” She opened the door to the room and added, “Now try not to be too shocked at all the equipment in the room. It’s all there to keep your Nick alive and looked after. You can hold his hand and talk to him. Just try not to touch any of the wires or tubes.”

Charlie was nervous but determined to be there for Nick so he wasn’t alone. “I understand.” He said softly. He followed her into the room and his heart broke. If he didn’t know that it was Nick in there he’s not sure he would have recognised him. There were just so many wires and tubes. Different machines were beeping. Nick’s beautiful face looked swollen and broken, the huge bandage a reminder of the surgery he had just survived. He cautiously approached the bed and sat down. He couldn’t take his eyes off the ventilator. It looked so brutal, having a tube forced down your throat. He blinked back tears as he gently held his boyfriend’s hand. “Hi,” he croaked. “I’m here baby. Please please get better. I’m so sorry this has happened to you. “ 

The nurse watched fondly from the end of the bed. She pressed a few buttons on one of the monitors and noted the readings. 

“You’ve got a fighter there,” she smiled at Charlie. “To survive this far, he’s shown amazing determination to live.” Charlie gave her a small smile. He knew how strong Nick was. “Keep going baby, “ he kissed Nick’s hand, he was far too afraid to touch his face. “I love you,” his voice broke as let the tears come. 

Outside intensive care, Sarah and Jane sat back in the quiet waiting room with the two police officers. 

“Please can we do this quickly?” Sarah asked. She felt so anxious being away from Nick. She needed to be there if he needed her.  She couldn’t bare to be away from his side for any longer.  

“Of course..” replied the officer. “ I’m PC Adams and this is PC Walter’s,” he indicated his colleague. Sarah gave them a small nod in acknowledgment. “Ok, so to be brief then, we have collected statements from eye witnesses who all agree that your son was not to blame for the accident. The other car seems to have veered into your lane”

“Yes,” Sarah snapped. “ I already knew that.” She really didn’t understand why they had taken her away from Nick to tell her what she already knew. She really didn’t mean to come off as rude but if this was all that they were wanting to talking to her about then this really was ridiculous. She already knew all this information. She was there, after all. 

“So in all cases of road traffic accidents, we always check the drug and alcohol levels of the drivers. Your Nick’s blood was taken and he was clear of both drugs and alcohol.” Sarah began to piece together what the officers were telling her but she wanted to hear it from them. “The driver of the other car failed a breathalyser test at the scene..” Jane let out a horrified gasp, “Further blood tests have shown he was more than twice the legal limit. He’s been arrested for causing a collision whilst under the influence of alcohol.” 

The officers looked carefully at Sarah. It never got any easier to give news like this to a relative. And Nick was so young. Sarah’s face took on a cold, steely expression. She was literally shaking with rage and hurt and couldn’t believe what she was being told. “Are you saying,” she hissed, “that my baby is lying in a hospital bed, on a ventilator…who knows if he will ever wake up…and if he does he may be brain damaged….you are saying that the man,” she spat the words at the officers “The man who did this was drunk?” Her voice was getting louder, she could feel the rage coming out of her. She was rarely ever angry, but when it came to her boys it was a different story. 

Jane laid a hand on her shoulder, quietening her. “Thank you for telling us…”she said diplomatically. “Do you need anything from Sarah now or can I take her back to her son?”

“No, we don’t need anything at the moment. We will take a statement from her later, and from Nick when he is able.” The officer seemed keen to leave them to it. He nodded at Sarah and the two officers left. Sarah immediately broke down. This was all so unfair. It shouldn’t be happening. Jane immediately pulled Sarah in to a tight embrace and just held her as she sobbed. As a mother herself, she didn’t even want to begin to think about what Sarah must be going through right now. It would he had enough to learn that your child had been involved in a horror crash but to actually be there, present at the scene and witness such things. To watch your child be cut out of a car wreck, rushed to hospital and resuscitated before your very own eyes. She was surprised Sarah was still standing.    

“How about we go get a coffee?” She suggested.  Sarah defitnely looked like she needed one, especially after the shock.  Sarah quickly shook her head.  “No! I can’t. I…I have to get back to Nicky.”   Sarah couldn’t bare to be away from her son for even another second.  Jane just nodded. “Okay.” She said softly. She wasn’t going to force Sarah to do anything she didn’t want to.  “How about I go get you one, eh?” She suggested.  “It’s been a long night and you’ve had a massive shock. I’ll nip down to the coffee shop before I take Charlie home? How does that sound?”   Sarah just looked at the other mother and nodded.  “Thank you..” she said softly. She couldn’t believe that there was a point not that long ago that both women didn’t exactly see eye to eye but now they had a close bond and they had their sons to thank for that.  

Sarah returned to the room and sat down on the opposite side of Nick’s bedside from Charlie. She immediately picked up her son’s hand again and gave it a gentle squeeze.  “I’m back, darling.” She assured him as she reached out with trembling hands and stroked his face.  She could feel her body shaking with anger.  Her beautiful baby boy was fighting for life because of some selfish scumbag that had decided to get behind the wheel intoxicated. Nick could still die. It broke her heart thinking about but she knew that Nick’s condition was life threatening.  Charlie was holding Nick’s other hand, giving it a soft squeeze every now and then. He glanced up, noticing Sarah’s red rimmed eyes. She had been crying, again, but it seemed like much more than that.  

“What did the police want?” He asked quietly.  Sarah glanced over at Charlie and her heart completely shattered as she noticed there in that moment just how young he looked.  His own eyes were red raw from crying, the tears he had shed over the state of her son, his boyfriend. She glanced down at the way Charlie had his fingers intertwined with Nick’s and her heard began to swell. Both boys loved each other so much.  She cleared her throat. She knew whatever way she delivered this news to Charlie would upset him.    “The driver of the other car…” she started, watching Charlie’s face closely.  “He…He was more than twice over the alcohol limit…”    Sarah watched as Charlie’s face fell. His eyes went wide and he shook his head in disbelief.   “He…He was drunk??” He questioned. “He smashed into you guys because he was drunk driving?”  He felt sick. This hadn’t just been an unfortunate accident. Someone had caused this by being reckless and stupid but that had lead to the boy he loves more than anything lying in a hospital bed in a medically induced coma, hooked up to a ventilator and fighting for his life.   “He can’t get away with it!” He explained.  “Oh he won’t..” Sarah assured as she gripped Nicks hand. “He’s been arrested…he’s going to pay for what did you you, my love.” She said as she kissed Nick’s hand.     

Jane returned in to the room a few moments later. She was carrying a large paper cup of coffee and a little pasty bag containing a blueberry muffin, she knew Sarah wouldn’t feel much like eating but she also knew she was intending on spending the entire night and beyond sitting vigil at her sons bedside. So she’d need to eat something eventually.  “Thank you.” Sarah whispered softly, completely overwhelmed by the kindness.  Jane placed the on the side and glanced down at Nick again, feeling a lump form in her throat. She kept couldn’t believe that this had happened.  Sarah had Nick had only been taking an innocent shopping trip.  The teenager looked so fragile and poorly, being kept alive by medical machinery.  It was just not fair, not in the slightest.  She then turned her attention to her own son who was slumped forward in the chair on the other side of the room, his hand securely grasping on to Nick’s as he softly traced his hand with his thumb. Charlie looked exhausted. His eyes were red rimmed and blood shot, his cheeks were tear stained. She’d never seen him cry the way he cried when she broke the news about Nick’s accident.  It would haunt her forever.   “Charlie…” she broke the silence softly, watching as he lifted his head and turned to look at her.  “I think it’s time we headed home, love.” She said as she glanced at her watch. It was half past eleven.  She fully expected Charlie to put up a fuss and protest, beg to stay longer, but he didn’t. He just nodded at her softly as he stood, bending as he did and placing a gentle kiss on Nick’s forehead being careful of the bandage.  “I’ll be back tomorrow, baby.” He whispered quietly but loud enough for the others in the room to hear.  He then glanced at Sarah.  “Is that okay?” He didn’t want to just intrude but the thought of being disallowed in to see Nick made him feel sick.   Sarah glanced it him immediately.  “Of course, darling.” She told him, surprised he’d even ask and to be perfectly honest. She’d need the company to stop her driving herself insane.  Sarah gave Charlie and Jane a hug and thanked them for coming so quickly and promised that she would let them know immediately if there was to be any update on Nick’s condition, before watching them leave.  

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Jane flopped down on the couch. Julio had long gone to bed as he was working early tomorrow. She had just checked on Oliver and Tori and Charlie had more or less retreated to his bedroom as soon as they arrived home, not saying a single word on the drive back. She was worried about him. This was a lot for a fifteen year old to deal with.  She knew Charlie wasn’t going to sleep a wink. She didn’t even know if she’d be able to. Every time she closed her eyes all she could see was Nick lay there motionless on the hospital bed.   She nervously held her phone in her hand. She knew Charlie and Nick’s friends had to be informed on what had happened this evening. How was she supposed to break it to them? They’d all be devastated.  She needed to speak to Yan Xao. She scrolled down her contact list, her finger hovering above Yan’s number. Would she be annoyed that Jane was phoning her after midnight, but she also knew that she had to break the news now because she’d never forgive herself if something happened to Nick during the night.   

Jane took a deep breath and pressed the call button. The phone rang and rang. She’s probably asleep, Jane thought. She was ready to leave a voicemail asking Yan to phone her as soon as she could when all of a sudden Yan picked up.

“Hello? Jane? Is that you?” Her voice sounded a bit rough, like she had been woken up from a deep sleep.

“Hi Yan, yeah it’s me. I am so sorry to wake you up at this hour. It’s a bit of an emergency…I wasn’t sure what to do,” she choked back a sob. She heard a shuffling sound through the phone and imagined Yan was sitting herself up in bed.

“Oh my goodness, what’s happened? An emergency? Is it Charlie? He’s not had a relapse has he?” Yan had really struggled when she found out Charlie had been admitted to inpatient. She’d always worried that she should have done more to help him.

“No no,” Jane quickly reassured her, “it’s not Charlie, he’s ok. But it’s his boyfriend, Nick. Something has happened…..” her voice tailed off. She really didn’t know what to say. How do you tell people this sort of news?

“Nick? Oh he’s a lovely boy, so polite. What on earth has happened? Is he alright.”

Jane decided that she just needed to say it. “Um, no he’s not. There was a car accident. A drunk driver crashed into them. He and Sarah were in the car. She’s ok but Nick…..he’s in a really bad way.” She could hear Yan’s gasp through the phone. “I don’t think it’s my place to give you all the details, but he’s in intensive care on a ventilator. He needed resuscitating…. We’ve just got back from the hospital. He’s in a critical condition…..” her voice broke as she spoke. “Charlie spent a little time with him when he came out of surgery but I’ve brought him home to rest. I..I…wanted to make sure Nick’s friends knew what had happened. Sarah was ok with me telling you. Charlie’s in a complete state, he won’t be on his phone but I think he really needs a friend right now.”

Yan’s voice was shaking as she spoke. This was not the news she was expecting to wake up to. “ Oh my god Jane, I can’t believe it. That poor boy. And Sarah too what she must be going through right now. What can we do to help?”

Jane smiled softly. It was a good decision to phone Yan. “Could Tao maybe come over first thing tomorrow and see Charlie? Help him to let the rest of their friend group know what has happened? Sarah is obviously staying at the hospital. She said she’d ring if anything happened overnight.”

“Tao’s still awake Jane. He’s a night owl. Let me talk to him and then I’ll bring him over. Nobody is going to be able to sleep after hearing news like this. The boys can support each other. And I can support you, it sounds like you’ve had a terrible shock too. I know how fond you are of Nick.”

“That sounds really good. We need to think about how we can support Sarah through this. I didn’t see any sign of Nick’s dad making an appearance…..”

After finishing up their conversation, Jane hung up the phone. She looked up to see Charlie stood in the doorway, his eyes red and bloodshot. He took one look at his mum and crumpled. “I thought you were on the phone to Sarah….that something had happened at the hospital…” he choked out.

“No darling, no.” Jane rushed over to him and pulled him into a warm hug. “ I was on the phone to Yan.  Letting her know what happened. Tao is on his way round.” Charlie just nodded.  That wasn’t a terrible idea. He could really do with Tao right now. It had been such an awful evening. He couldn’t get the images of Nick lying so still in ICU out of his mind. All of the tubes and machines working overtime in keeping his boyfriend alive. It wasn’t fair, but learning that the accident was caused by a drunk driver just infuriated him. He really hoped the monster that had done this, was locked up for a really long time.   He could hear mugs clinking in the kitchen as Jane had gone to prepare tea for everyone. Charlie grimaced, he didn’t think he’d be able to keep anything down even if he tried. His stomach was twisting and turning in knots of worry. Would Nick wake up soon? Would he wake up at all?  Would he remember anything? Would he be brain damaged? 

Charlie’s mental torture was interrupted by the floorboards creaking, he glanced up to see Tori hovering in the doorway. She had her dressing gown wrapped firmly around her body as she sipped gingerly through a straw of a glass of diet lemonade.  She tiptoed in to the room and sat next to her little brother.  She didn’t say anything at all, she just held her arms out and allowed him to collapse in to her arms, sobbing. She held him tightly. Just like she always did when he got upset, but this was different.  She’d never experienced anything like this before. How was she supposed to make things better for Charlie?  “How’s Nick??” She asked hesitantly.  Charlie pulled away from her embrace and looked up at her with teary eyes.  “He’s in intensive care.” He whispered.  Tori’s eyes widened. Jesus. That was serious. “He had to have have surgery.” He explained “He fractured his skull in the accident which lead to a brain haemorrhage…”  Tori gasped as she put her hand up to her mouth.  “They’ve placed him in a medically induced coma to let the swelling around his brain go down before they attempt to bring him around.” Charlie told her as the tears began to flow agin.  “He’s not even breathing on his own, Tor.” He sobbed. “They’ve got him on a ventilator….they…they had to reusisitate him, twice.”    Tori couldn’t believe what she was hearing and insticively just pulled Charlie  in for another hug . “Nick will get through this. He’s strong.”   Charlie just sobbed. Tori was right. Nick was strong. He’s one of the strongest people that he knows, but maybe this obstacle is just too big.  He didn’t want to think about the possibility of Nick dying, but he couldn’t stop the thought crossing his mind.  “What if he dies Tor??” He croaked out.  Tori rubbed soothing circles on her younger brothers back. “He isn’t going to die, Charlie.” She said, trying to assure herself as well as Charlie. 

Charlie shook his head. “You don’t know that.” He sighed. “Even the doctors aren’t convinced that Nick is going to survive.”   Tori sighed. “We just need to keep thinking positively.” She told him. “Nick is going to need you to be strong for him.” 

They were interrupted by a small tapping at the door. Tori glanced at Charlie with confusion written all over her face. Who on earth could be knocking on their front door at 1:30 in the morning??  Charlie caught her inquisitive look. “That will be Tao and Yan. Mum called them…”. Just then they heard Jane opening the front door. Charlie quickly pulled himself to his feet as he made his way out in to the hallway just as Yan and Tao stepped inside.  Tao quickly slipped off his shoes, knowing the drill. He then bypassed his mum who had wasted no time in engulfing Jane in to a tight embrace.  He raced to his best friends side, doing exactly the same.  “I cant believe this has happened.” He said in a hoarse voice as he pulled Charlie in to a tight hug. Tao was not one of those people that showed emotion, easily, but as soon as Yan had come in to his bedroom, sat down on the edge of the bed and told him about her call with Jane he had burst out crying. Nick was a friend, who yeah he was ashamed to admit that it had taken him a long time to accept Nick in to their friendship group. Mostly because he didn’t want to see Charlie get hurt but now he considered Nick to be one of his closest friends and the thought of him lying in hospital fighting for his life, upset him.   “I know.” Charlie cried as he glanced up at Tao, remaining in the embrace.  “It shouldn’t have happened. Nick and Sarah were only nipping out grocery shopping.” He sighed. “Now Nick is literally fighting to stay alive, all because of some drunken arsehole!” He seethed. Charlie suddenly felt Tao go tense in his arms and his eyes widened as realisation dawned on him.  How hadn’t he thought of this before??  Tao’s father had passed away after being hit by a drunk driver four years ago. “Tao…” 

Tao pulled away and looked at Charlie.  “They were hit by a drunk driver??” He asked in a quiet voice.  Charlie’s face had gone so pale. He suddenly felt guilty and insensitive. He hadn’t even thought. “I’m so sorry, Tao.” Charlie told him. Tao shook his head firmly. What had happened to his father had been a shock. It had been the worst thing that he had ever had to experience. He had only been 12 years old at the time. As traumatic as his experience was, he wasn’t about to make this all about him. This was about Nick.  “It’s not going to be the same.” He told Charlie matter of factly.  “Nick isnt going to die.”  He said firmly as he pulled Charlie back in for a hug.  “What are the doctors saying? Mum says Nick is in Intensive care?”  Charlie nodded.  “He is in a coma..” 

“Shit,” Tao looked at Charlie’s tear stained face.

“Yeah,” Charlie sighed. “He….he….stopped breathing a couple of times, they’ve operated on him but they say he’s in a critical condition.” Charlie took a shuddering breath, “He fractured his skull, there was a bleed on his brain…..” Charlie dissolved back into sobs, “I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to tell everyone Tao, this is just a nightmare. If he dies……” Tao cut him off.

“Hey, none of that. I’ll tell the group, we can write the message together. We need to think positively Charlie. Nick needs all the good thoughts and hell I’m not religious but all the prayers we can send his way. Ok?”

Charlie gave a tiny smile and nod. He was so glad his mum phoned Yan. He hadn’t realised how much he needed a friend right now.

Tao spent a few minutes tapping on his phone, trying to come up with a way to break the news to everyone in the group chat. He knew they wouldn’t get the message till the morning as it was really late now but he wanted to get it sent and then try and help Charlie to rest before his return to the hospital the next day.

“Ok, how about this?” He handed the phone to Charlie who read the message, tears welling up yet again.

Hi everyone, I’m writing this message with Charlie. There’s no easy way to say this so I’m just going to type it out. Nick has been in a bad car accident. It’s really serious. He’s got a fractured skull and has had to have surgery for a bleed on his brain. He’s in intensive care. I know this sounds unbelievable. His mum is with him and I am with Charlie. I will message as soon as we get an update. I’m sorry for sending this as a text but we needed to let you all know.

“Yeah that’s good, thanks Tao,” Charlie handed it back to him. How was this his life right now? They had a cinema date planned for tomorrow. They’d booked the tickets already. This just seemed like a nightmare that he was unable to wake up from.

“Right, I’ve sent it. Now come on, let’s lay on your bed, and try to rest. I know you don’t want to sleep but let’s stick a movie on in the background. You might be able to shut your eyes and get a little bit of rest.”

Charlie knew he wasn’t going to sleep a wink but he agreed to try. He curled up next to Tao on his small single bed and closed his eyes. He just wanted to get back to the hospital and back to Nick. Tao hugged him tight and emotions of the past hour wash over him. Nick just had to be ok.

Chapter Text

Sarah blinked her eyes open as she heard the squeak of a door opening. She winced and rubbed her stiff neck, realising that she had fallen asleep in an awkward position. She suddenly remembered where she was as she took in her surroundings. The steady beeping of the machinery in the room and the hiss of the ventilator.  She glanced at her watch. 8am. She couldn’t have been sleeping long as she remembered the last time she checked the time it was around 6:30am. She had spent the night gripping Nick’s hand and just talking nonsense to him.   She glanced up at Nick’s doctor, a middle aged man. He smiled kindly, greeting her  as he took out a little pen torch and lifted Nick’s eyelids up, shining the light over his pupils, looking for any reaction.  There was none.  Sarah looked at him hopefully.  “No change, I’m afraid.” Sarah sighed.   He checked the machines, scribbled down some notes, fiddled around with some buttons and then left the room.  Sarah sat up straight, rubbing her neck and letting out a yawn. She reached over and held Nick’s hand.  “Morning sweetheart..” she said stroking the back of his hand with her thumb.  “You need to open those beautiful eyes soon. I’m getting a stiff neck.” She joked but it just came out as a hitched sob as the tears started to fill her eyes again.  “Oh Nicky!” She cried.  “I need you to wake up, darling.” she kissed his knuckles and held his hand close to her chest.  The door opened again and in walked one of the nurses,  carrying a steaming cup of tea.   Sarah smiled fondly. They had been ever so kind during the night, popping in every now and then bringing her cups of tea and a blanket that she had draped over her lap.  “Thank you.” Sarah smiled as she accepted the cup of tea. “You’ve been more than kind.” She took a sip of the steaming brew before setting the cup on the side table.   “You don’t have to thank us.”  Stephanie, the kind nurse smiled.   “You’ve got a fighter there.” She glanced at Nick.  Sarah smiled softly as she squeezed her son’s hand again. “Oh, I know. He’s always been so strong…so determined.”   Stephanie smiled.  “He’s just like his mum, then.”  Sarah shook her head.  “Nonsense! I don’t feel very strong.”  “You’ve experienced such a massive trauma. You were involved in the crash as well.” The nurse reminded her. As if Sarah could forget. She would never forget the image of Nick’s unconscious, limp body slumped over the steering wheel.  Sarah touched the gash on her forehead that had been cleaned up and dressed during the night.  “It all just happened so fast.” Sarah stuttered.  “Nicky only passed his driving test a fortnight ago…he always gets so excited when I allow him to drive to get the food shopping…” she then choked on a sob.  “This is so wrong! I should be at home making pancakes for breakfast.  Nicky loves pancakes on a Saturday…”

The nurse gave her a sympathetic smile. “You need to rest,” she said knowingly. “Nick is doing his job, fighting hard but he’ll need his mum to look after herself too.” She saw the look on Sarah’s face, “I know you don’t want to leave him, but just think about it. A shower, a change of clothes and some food would do you the world of good. We’d look after him,”

“Maybe at some point,” Sarah wasn’t going to argue with the kind nurse. However she had no intentions of leaving the hospital while he was in this condition, she’d never forgive herself if something happened when she was at home. 

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Charlie must have dozed off, though he didn’t remember doing so. He felt sluggish and tired and for a blissful few seconds his brain didn’t remember the events from last night. However they soon came crashing back and he bolted upright, “oh my god I fell asleep, is there any news?” Tao, who had stayed with him all night, trying his best to comfort him, shook his head. 

“No, there’s been no update yet. But that’s good news yeah? Means he’s still fighting. Sarah promised to phone if anything happened.” Charlie glanced at the clock. 7.45am. He wondered what was happening at the hospital. Was Sarah doing ok? He couldn’t imagine what it was like for her, being in the car, seeing the horror unfold. 

“I guess so.” He mumbled. He briefly wondered if his friends had seen the message Tao sent but he didn’t have it in him to check. He couldn’t bear to read all their concerned messages. It just made it all so much more real. As if reading his mind Tao opened up the messages on his phone,

“Everyone is beside themselves in the group chat. They want to know what they can do to help?” He looked at Charlie, “I think they’d like to come and be with you too?”

Charlie shook his head, “Not yet,” he whispered, “not today. I just need to go to the hospital and be with Nick.” Tao understood, Charlie seemed so overwhelmed. At that moment Jane opened the door softly and peered in, holding a tray with two mugs of steaming tea and a few slices of toast.

“Morning sweetheart,” she approached the boys who were sitting up in bed. They both looked exhausted, “I know you won’t feel like it but you need to eat something. You need to keep your strength up for Nick. You won’t be able to visit him if you don’t have any energy.” Charlie sighed. She knew he was right, though his stomach was in knots. 

“I’ll try,” he gave her a small smile and grabbed the mug of tea. The steam felt good against his face, helping him to wake up. He nibbled on a slice of toast, quietly proud of himself for being able to keep it down. 

“We will leave for the hospital soon, go get showered and ready,” his mum left him to it. Charlie was showered and changed into his usual ripped jeans and t shirt. He grabbed the hoodie off his chair which obviously belonged to Nick. He breathed in the scent, calmed by the familiar Nick smell. 

Soon they were back at the hospital, walking through the double doors leading to the ICU. Charlie knocked quietly on Nick’s door, and hearing Sarah’s reply he stepped back inside. 

Everything looked just as it did the night before. The same tubes, the same wires, the same beeping. Nick was in exactly the same position, unmoving and so very pale. “Hi Sarah,” he said softly, “How is he?” He walked over to Nick’s side, bending down to kiss him carefully on the cheek. He picked up his hand and held it gently. Sarah looked at him with a tired smile. 

“Morning darling, he’s been ok, still fighting. The doctors have been coming in every hour to check on him. He’s made it through the night” she gave Nick’s hand a squeeze “Charlie’s here to see you love, why don’t you open those eyes hmm?” They both looked at Nick for any sign that he could hear them, but he remained motionless on the bed, his chest rising and falling rhythmically with the ventilator. Jane was watching from the doorway, her heart breaking at the scene in front of her. 

“Morning Sarah, did manage to get any rest?” She looked at her with concern. Sarah shrugged her shoulders, “I think I dozed for a little bit.” 

“Why don’t we go and get a coffee while Charlie keeps Nick company? Give you a bit of caffeine to get through the morning,” Sarah hesitated. On the one hand she really didn’t want to be away from him but on the other she could do with stretching her legs and getting a decent coffee. 

“Ok,” she agreed, “ but just a quick one, I’ll get a takeaway so I can come straight back.”

Jane smiled at her. Sarah kissed Nick’s cheek, “back in a minute baby,” and the two mums left, closing the door behind them. Charlie was grateful for a few moments alone with Nick.

“Morning baby,” he stroked Nick’s arm carefully, “I think it’s time to wake up now ok? The whole gang are so worried about you.” He stifled a sob, “please be ok Nick. You’ve got to get better,” he begged. He told Nick about Tao coming over and how worried Tori was. He tried to keep his voice light and positive. Talk to Nick like it was just a normal day. As he sat in the hard plastic chair, he noticed Nick’s heart monitor was beginning to beep faster. He looked at Nick in alarm. Was he waking up? Suddenly Nick’s whole body began to convulse. The monitor alarm sounded, “Oh my god,” Charlie began to panic. Nick was having a seizure literally in front of him. “Nick? Baby wake up!” He panicked. What was he supposed to do? The door to the room burst open and a nurse came running in. She pushed a button on the wall, alerting other medical staff to the emergency. Within seconds the room was full of doctors and nurses. They surrounded Nick’s bed, he saw a nurse injecting his IV with a clear liquid before Charlie was ushered out of the room by a young nurse and the door was closed. 

Charlie stood in shock. Tears pouring down his face. What the hell had just happened? “Charlie?” He turned to see Sarah racing down the corridor towards him, her eyes full of concern. Jane was close behind. “ What’s the matter? Why aren’t you in with Nick?”

Charlie let out a sob , “I don’t know what happened, I’m sorry! One minute I was talking to him, the next alarms were going off….and he was having some sort of fit. They made me leave, I don’t know what’s going on…” he dissolved into tears. Sarah just stood in shock. No no no, she shouldn’t have left him. She would never forgive herself for not being with him. 

The minutes felt like hours as Sarah stood there, pale and shaking, watching through the glass window to her baby’s hospital room watching as they prodded him with needles and injected him with all sorts of medications.  What was going on? Why had Nick suffered a seizure? Was he going to die? No! No! She tried to shove the thought to the back off her mind but it was there, niggling, eating away at her. She could lose her son. The doctors had already told her that it was a possibility that Nick wasn’t going to recover from this.  Suddenly the doors to Nick’s room opened and he was wheeled out in to the corridor. Nurses and doctors surrounded the bed. Tubes and wires surrounding him and a portable Ventilator being pushed along wide.    Sarah’s eyes were widened.  “What’s going on??? Where are you taking him?” She asked desperately. She needed to know what was going on.  

“We’re taking Nicholas for a CT Scan.” Nick’s doctor explained.  “We’ve managed to stop the seizure and stabilise your son but we’re unsure of what caused it…” he carried on.  “I’m hoping that the scan will give us more of an idea.”  Sarah listened to the doctor without taking her eyes off her son. He just looked so fragile, so vulnerable connected to all the tubes and wires. He was still alive. She had to hold on to that.   “If you just take a seat in the waiting room…”    “Can’t I come with him???” Sarah quizzed. The idea of being torn apart from her son again terrified her.  The doctor gave her a sympathetic smile.  “I promise you. Nick is in good hands.” and with that they disappeared down the corridor. 

Sarah’s foot nervously tapped on the waiting room floor. She just wanted to see Nick. She just wanted to hold his hand and promise him that everyone was going to be okay.  Jane sat next to her, a gentle hand on her shoulder, speaking words of comfort.  Sarah couldn’t concentrate on anything else. She just needed news.   Charlie sat in the corner of the room. He felt completely frozen in fear.  Was this his fault??? Had he caused this?? He was the only other person in the room with Nick, when he had his seizure.  He wouldn’t never be able to forgive himself if he had played a part in Nick bad turn.  What was taking them so long? Surely it didn’t take this long to perform a scan.   “I’m so sorry, Sarah…” Charlie blurted out. The guilt was churning his stomach.  Sarah glanced at the young boy. Her heart broke seeing his bloodshot and tear stained eyes. He clearly hadn’t gotten much sleep himself.  “Whatever for, darling?” She asked softly. Whatever could Charlie possibly have to be sorry about?    Charlie sighed as he pulled himself up straight, he took a shaky breath.   “I was with him…” he sighed. “I was holding Nick’s hand….what…what if I caused this?” He whispered, his voice thick with emotion.  Sarah quickly got to her feet before kneeling down in front if Charlie. Placing her hand on his knee. “Hey…none of that, ok?” She assured him.  “This isn’t your fault, Charlie.” She said firmly. “I…I don’t know what’s caused Nick to have a seizure, but I know for a fact…it’s nothing you’ve done.” She said reaching out and squeezing his hand. “Okay?” She repeated. She needed him to confirm that he understood what she was saying. She couldn’t stand Charlie blaming himself for any of this. Charlie glanced at Sarah before nodding softly. Sarah pulled him in for a hug. They would get through this. They had to, for Nick. 

Another 20 minutes passed. Sarah had consumed 2 cups of cheap coffee from the machine in the corner of the room. It was cheap coffee and did absolutely nothing to calm her nerves, but she was in dire need of the caffeine.  Suddenly the door opened and Nick’s doctor stepped inside. Sarah leapt up immediately.  “How is he??” She said quickly. She just needed to be back at her baby’s bedside.  The doctor cleared his throat and glanced up at her.  “Nick’s stable. He’s being settled back in to his ICU room…” he explained before carrying on.  “The seizure was caused by a blood clot on the brain.” He explained. Sarah gasped. Jane and Charlie were looking on, horrified.   “Oh my god.” Sarah replied, feeling sick.   “We’ve administered some blood thinning medication directly through Nicholas’ IV drip to help dissolve the clot.” He explained. “We will be monitoring him very closely.”   “But he is okay?” Sarah asked desperately.   “He is stable, however he is running a bit of a fever.”   “What?? Why?” Sarah questioned. Nick wasn’t sick. “Damage to certain areas of the brain can sometimes distrust the body’s ability to manage is own autonomic functions..” he explained. Sarah just stared at his blankly. “He’s going to be okay, though??”   “Nick is currently still in a coma. We are treating the clot and managing his temperature with medication but I’m afraid his condition still remains critical…”   Sarah blinked back her tears. Nick was going to pull through this. He was so so strong.  “Can I see him, please?” She asked. She just needed to be close. “Of course, I’ll get a nurse to come and get you as soon as he’s settled.” She thanked the doctor and he left. Sarah slumped back down in her chair. 

They were soon visited by a nurse who informed them that Nick was settled and they could go back in. Charlie looked at his mum, “can I go and see him quickly before we go home? Just to see for myself that he’s ok?” Jane smiled softly at him, “of course Charlie, then let’s leave Sarah to have some time with him.” Sarah smiled at Charlie, “Nick is so lucky to have you Charlie,” she gave him a hug and they returned to Nick’s room together. 

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Sarah parked her rental car in the hospital car park, paid for her parking and began the walk through the hospital up to the intensive care unit. She picked up a coffee for herself from the little kiosk on the way. She couldn’t quite believe that it was Friday and a whole week had passed since the accident. A whole week since her life had been shattered. 7 days of sitting by her son’s bedside while he was kept alive by machines. 7 days of crying, praying, pleading with the doctors to make him better. He was still in the same condition. No change. She refused to lose hope but with each day it became just that little bit harder to believe he would pull through. 

Greeting the nurse at the desk, she walked the familiar route to Nick’s room. It was just after lunch as she entered his room and took her usual place by his side. “Hello sweetheart,” she kissed him on the cheek. “I’m back. Nellie and Henry send you lots of doggy kisses and cuddles,” she heard a chuckle from the other side of the bed.

“I hope you managed some sleep Sarah,” her sister Diane looked closely at her. 

“I did,” Sarah replied quietly, “thank you for sitting with him again for me.” Diane scoffed. “ Do not thank me for coming to spend time with my nephew. I’m just glad you’ve finally realised you can’t do this on your own and are accepting other people’s help. For Nicks sake as much as your own.” Sarah was so grateful to her sister. After she’d broken the news of Nicks condition she had dropped everything to come and stay with her, looking after the dogs and making sure Sarah had hot meals. After a lot of persuading she’d also managed to get her to go home, shower and sleep while Diane kept watch over Nick so he was never alone. They’d settled into a little routine where Diane would arrive early in the morning and take over, Sarah would go home to sleep and then return to stay with him for the rest of the day and night. She could never thank her sister enough. 

They’d finally managed to get hold of Stephane 3 days after Nick had been admitted. He flew over and spent some time at Nicks bedside. But when it became clear Nick wasn’t going to recover quickly, he had to get back to Paris. Sarah wasn’t sure how she felt about it really. She was glad he’d made the effort but that would be little comfort to Nick when he woke up and found he hadn’t stayed around. David had really stepped up. He’d got an early flight home from his holiday and had been helping Diane with the dogs, visiting Nick every day. She would never forget the look on his face when he saw his little brother for the first time. David was not a crier. In fact she hadn’t seen him cry in years. But he sobbed at his brothers bedside and she was sure she’d heard him whispering apologies to him quietly, begging him to get better so he could say sorry properly. 

Charlie had been a huge support and comfort to her and Nick. He visited every day after school, staying for a couple of hours before his mum came to take him home for his dinner. She was worried about him. He looked like he wasn’t sleeping . She encouraged him to talk to his friends and let them support him. She desperately wanted to be able to give him good news when he visited, but so far there really hadn’t been any. 

Sarah gently stroked Nick’s arm . “ you have even more get well soon cards waiting for you at home,” she smiled at him, “ so many people are waiting for you to wake up baby. I’ve had messsges from your teachers even! Coach Singh says she can’t wait for her rugby captain to get back on the pitch! All your friends are so keen to come and visit you my darling. You just need to wake up now.” 

Diane gathered up her things and gave Sarah a hug. “Call me if you need me ok? If not I’ll be here bright and early tomorrow.” Sarah tightened the hug. 

“Thank you,” she whispered. 

Sarah passed the time reading to Nick. She had chosen some of the books he loved as a child and was in the middle of Roald Dahl’s The Witches when there was a soft knock on the door and Charlie poked his head round. Sarah closed the book and beckoned him in.

“Charlie’s here to see you darling,” she squeezed Nick’s hand. Charlie sat on the opposite side of the bed in his now familiar spot. He still found it a shock every time he came in the room and was confronted with his boyfriend in such a terrible state, but he was getting used to the one sided conversations. “Hi babe,” he gently kissed his hand, “ I missed you at school today. Form sucks without you.” Sarah listened fondly as Charlie filled Nick in on the details of his day at Truham. 

After a while it was time for the doctor to check in with Nick. He completed his usual checks, noting down numbers and observations. He pulled up a chair next to Sarah, who raised her eyebrows at him, “Any improvements?”

The doctor looked at her sympathetically. “ no changes I’m afraid,” Sarah slumped back in her chair. “However….  “ she felt the tiniest amount of hope and looked at him intently, “ Nick has been stable for the past few days. We’d like to do another scan and then if everything looks ok we’d like to try removing the ventilator to see if he is able to breathe unaided. “ Sarah gasped. This was progress, this was a step forward. She let out a breath and looked at Charlie who for the first time all week looked like there might be some hope. 

The CT scan went very well. The swelling on Nick’s brain had gone down significantly well and there was no new signs of bleeding or clotting. His fever had broke a few days ago as well so all of the signs of trying to wean him off the ventilator were looking positive.  

Sarah re-entered the room after the nurses had resettled Nick after being taken away for his scan and she was informed that the doctor would be back around to speak to her shortly.  Charlie had just left as Jane had came to collect him. She knew it was important for Charlie to be around Nick and to be able to visit him daily for his own mental health but she also knew how important it was that he went home to rest and eat, he looked exhausted recently. 

Sarah reclaimed her usual seat beside her son’s bed and finished off reading from the book to pass the time that she was waiting on the doctor to come speak to her.  She placed the book on the bedside table and picked Nick’s hand up, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I know you’re in there Nicky…” she said softly. The doctor had told her that there was a possibility that Nick may still be able to hear what was going on around him, even from his comatose state. “I know you’re there, somewhere.” She said as she reached out to gently stroke his cheek.  “I just wish you’d come back to me, baby.” She sighed. “I miss you so much.  Charlie misses you. David misses you….everyone does.” She said beginning to choke up. She was interrupted by the door opening and the doctor entering. He gave her an apologetic nod and pulled up a chair.  Sarah placed Nick’s hand back down on the mattress and turned to glance at the doctor. What was the verdict?    “Nicholas’ most recent scan shows that the swelling on the brain has reduced massively.”   Sarah felt a flutter of hope but she tried to not get her hopes up too soon and allowed the doctor to continue.    “I’d like to try removing Nick from the ventilator. I don’t want to lie to you as it isn’t always straight forward…”  Sarah frowned.  “What do you mean? What exactly could go wrong?”  The doctor sighed.  “In most cases, the removal of the life support machine goes fairly smoothly but in other cases…when removing the breathing tube, we might find the patient is unable to breathe on their own which would result on us having to re-intubate.” He explained. He was hopeful that wouldn’t be the case with Nick but as a medical professional he was legally required to explain the risks.   “Would I be able to stay while you did it?” She asked. The thought of having to leave the room was unbearable. What if it went wrong?  The doctor nodded.  “You’re more than welcome to stay, although I will warn you that it won’t be pleasant.”  

It was settled. The doctor went to fetch the required equipment including a back up tube in case the removal failed and a nasal cannula as Nick would still required some assistance in breathing if all went smoothly. Sarah used this time to type out a group text and send it to Charlie, David, Diane and stéphane.  

I’ve just spoken to the doctor. Nick’s had another CT scan and everything is looking positive. They are about to try weaning him off of the ventilator. If all goes well, they will be able to start reducing the sedation and begin to bring him around. I’ll keep you all updated xx

Jane had just dropped Charlie off around Tao’s house. His mum had suggested Charlie come over for a movie night with his friends. Charlie had been reluctant at first, it didn’t seem right without Nick, but now, surrounded by his friends  all bundled up on Tao’s bed, he was glad he came. His phone lit up with a message on the group Sarah had set up to keep Nick’s loved ones informed of his condition. 

“Oh my god,” Charlie whispered as he read Sarah’s latest message. 

“What is it?” Isaac looked up from his book and saw the shocked look on Charlie’s face. Everyone stopped chatting and turned to look at him.

“Sarah just messaged. They are going to try and take Nick off the ventilator. And maybe if that goes ok try to wake him up?” His stomach felt funny. The room felt like it was spinning. He didn’t know how to process this. It was good news right? But he’d been researching Nick’s condition. This was such a risky thing to do. If he didn’t start breathing by himself….

“Hey, hey, Charlie, breathe with me,” Elle held him by the shoulders and looked at him closely,”it’s going to be ok. You just need to breathe.”

“This is good news right?” Tao asked. “They wouldn’t be trying if they didn’t think it was going to work.”

“It’s definitely good news Charlie,” Isaac added. “We need to send all our positive thoughts to Nick.”

Charlie tried to smile, his heart still felt like it was racing. “I just want him to be ok,” he whispered. His friends all joined him in a giant Charlie hug. They were all completely devastated about what had happened to Nick, but they knew how they were feeling was nothing compared to Charlie, who looked completely exhausted and worn out. 

“I know,” Tao broke away from the hug, “as a way of sending all our thoughts to Nick, why don’t we watch a marvel movie in his honour.” Charlie actually let out a laugh. He hadn’t laughed in forever but the idea of Tao choosing a Marvel movie was so absurd. 

“Tao!” Elle smiled at him, “I love that idea. Come on Charlie, choose Nick’s favourite before he changes his mind.”

Charlie knew he wouldn’t focus on the film but he loved his friends so much for everything they were doing to keep him going. As they settled to watch the film, Charlie kept his phone next to him, on loud, just waiting for an update from Sarah. 

At the hospital the doctor returned with two nurses and a tray of equipment. 

“Right, let’s get started” the doctor looked kindly at Sarah. “You are welcome to hold his hand and talk to him while we remove the tube. I must remind you, we don’t know for sure how Nick will respond. If he doesn’t start to breathe on his own we will immediately reintubate.” 

“I understand,” Sarah gripped Nick’s hand tightly. “Come on baby it’s time now. You can do this,”

Over the next few moments the doctor worked carefully. He switched off the ventilator and removed the tape from where the tubes were stuck carefully to Nick’s face. He slowly pulled out the large tube in Nick’s throat. Sarah held her breath. Was Nick going to be able to do this? The doctor was staring at the heart monitor beside the bed. It continued to beep in a steady rhythm, if a little slower than before. 

“Ok, this looks good so far,” he smiled at Sarah. “Your boy is breathing on his own!” Sarah broke down in tears as she looked at Nick, “well done my darling, you are doing so well.” She looked up at the doctor, “What happens now?” 

“Well, a lot of this depends on young Nicholas here. We will reduce the sedation we have him on but that doesn’t mean he will instantly wake up. We don’t know what kind of damage the accident may have caused his brain. He may wake up quickly, he may take a while or…..”

“He might not wake up at all?” Sarah whispered. 

“That is a possibility but we won’t know until we try.” The doctor gave her a reassuring smile. “He’s already exceeded everyone’s expectations. He’s survived a terrible injury, he’s breathing on his own. It’s all good signs. Just hang on in there.”

Sarah tried to take the positive words in. She watched Nick’s chest rise and fall. He was going to be ok, he just had to be.

The nurse was fiddling with his monitors. “Keep talking to him,” she said kindly. “When he comes round from the sedation he’s going to be very confused and hearing your voice will be a real comfort to him.” Sarah nodded at her, she could do this. 

Evening came, Sarah watched as nurses and doctors came and went. They were doing regular checks on Nick who was still breathing unaided but hadn’t shown any signs of waking up yet. She studied his face for any movement, “I texted the group to let them know how well you are doing, Charlie is going to be here first thing tomorrow. Everyone is so proud of you my darling, you are doing so well.” She leaned over and kissed his cheek gently. The bruising on his face seemed more prominent without the ventilator tube. His skin looked sore where the tape had been attached to his cheeks. “I’m going to be here when you are ready to wake up sweetheart, you just take your time. Mums not going anywhere.” 

A kind nurse appeared with a cup of tea for Sarah. She thanked her and settled back in her chair. It was going to be a long night. She didn’t dare even close her eyes in case she missed the moment Nick decided to wake. 

It was around 3 in the morning when Sarah felt Nick’s hand twitch slightly. She sat up straight, “Nicky?” She squeezed his hand. “Can you hear me darling, it’s mum !” His eyes were still closed but his face was no longer still and relaxed. His forehead was creased under the bandage and his mouth was slightly open. Sarah immediately pressed the call button and a nurse appeared within seconds. “I think he’s waking up!” Sarah looked at the nurse for confirmation. She nodded back at her,

“I’m going to page the doctor, just sit tight.” Sarah’s heart was in her throat. This was it. 

Nick felt like he was in a fog. He couldn’t work out where he was, or when it was. He didn’t know who he was, it was like he was lost in a forest and couldn’t find his way out. Pain. He felt pain in his head and chest. He could hear a strange beeping noise. He was so so confused. His brain felt like it was still trying to boot up like a computer. He felt someone holding his hand. They were talking to him so calmly. Who was that? He couldn’t register the words. Everything was just so woozy. He tried to open his eyes but the light was too bright. He was aware that the lights were being dimmed so he tried again, squeezing his eyes open and blinking. All he could see was a white ceiling above him . The beeps were getting louder as his ears adjusted to all the noise.  A familiar face appeared in his vision. She had tears rolling down her face as she smiled down at him. She looked familiar but he was having trouble placing her. “I’m here baby, mums here,” oh of course, his mum. He tried to speak but he couldn’t get any words out, just a groan. He locked eyes with her and Sarah saw that he recognised her. Her face broke into the biggest smile. “It’s ok sweetheart, don’t try to talk. You’ve been in an accident. I am so happy to see you awake.” An accident? He didn’t remember that. He was having trouble remembering anything. He closed his eyes and fell back to sleep.

Sarah looked at the doctor who reassured her, “This is perfectly normal. I’m extremely pleased with how that went. He obviously recognised you. I fully expect him to be in and out for the next day or so.” He gave Sarah a reassuring pat on the shoulder as he left the room. “This is the best result we could have hoped for so far.” Sarah thanked him as he left and opened up her phone ready to tell everyone the good news. 

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The movie afternoon at Tao’s house had escalated in to a movie evening and had turned in to a full blown Marvel Marathon, much to Tao’s displeasure but it was Charlie’s request and he would do anything for his best friend right now. Yan had gone to Tesco’s and purchased lots of snacks for the Paris squad as well as ordering Pizzas’s. Charlie was going completely out of his mind as it had been hours and he was yet to hear anything else from Sarah.  The ending  titles for Guardians of the Galaxy had just came up on the screen when Charlie’s phone pinged, indicating a message from Sarah, the noise in the room suddenly quietened as Charlie reached out for his phone and glanced over the message, anxiously.  

Hi Charlie, darling. 

Sorry to disturb you. I know it’s the middle of the night but I just thought you’d like to know that Nick woke up briefly.  He’s very disoriented and extremely exhausted but he opened his eyes. It’s too soon to tell anything yet but early signs are positive. They’ve removed the ventilator and have replaced it with a nasal cannula for oxygen. Nick hasn’t spoken yet and he’s so very confused but I feel like he recognised me. I don’t want to get my hopes up too soon but I think this definitely a step in the right position xx 

Charlie read the message out loud to his friends who were also desperate for a Nick update.   “That’s positive news..” Elle said as she hugged Charlie.  “He’s awake….hes actually awake.” Charlie replied. He couldn’t quite believe it, he had convinced himself that this wasn’t going to happen by getting in to his own head but Nick had woken up. His determination was inspiring.  Charlie just wanted to rush to his bedside. Hug him and tell him just how much he meant to him. He responded to Sarah’s message asking if it would be okay if he visited first thing in the morning.  

The next time Nick came around was a few hours later. He had been asleep for ages. He was on so many different medications that it was no surprise. He was aware of the irritating beeping again immediately as it bleeped in a steady rhythm from either side of the bed  where he was laying. The pain was still very much present in his head, even though the nurses had kept his morphine topped up. His throat was sore from where the ventilator had been shoved down it for 7 days.  He could feel something in his left nostril, a tube of some sort? Oh, that was right. He was in hospital? He blinked his eyes open. He just felt so disoriented and groggy. He felt like he was floating.  Why was he here? He couldn’t remember a thing. He just felt so scared and overwhelmed. He didn’t understand what had happened. Nick blinked, trying to adjust to the room. It was bright, too bright.   He could feel the prick of dozens of tiny cuts and bruises as they lay upon his face.    “Nicky?”  There was that comforting voice from before, again. He squinted his eyes and tried to focus on where it was coming from. He rolled his head to the right, slowly. His mum. She was there.   Sarah scooted closer to the bed and quickly gripped Nick’s hand and kissed it gently.  “Hello darling. It’s okay. You’re ok…” she soothed as she could immediately see the fear in his eyes. She then reached over and pressed the buzzer on the wall as the doctor had asked her to inform him the next time Nick woke as he wanted to perform some tests.  Nick hadn’t spoken yet but the doctor assured her that this wasn’t necessarily a sign of damage to the brain, just that Nick’s body had been through a major shock and although he had been asleep for a whole week, he was probably absolutely exhausted.  It was normal for him to be so sleepy.   Nick stared up at Sarah. His chocolate brown eyes swimming in complete confusion.  “Do you know where you are, baby?” She asked. Although she had told Nick this the last time he had been awake, she wanted to see if he could remember.  Nick just stared blankly at her.  Sarah felt a lump in her throat. Had she gotten her hopes up too soon? What if Nick was brain damaged? What if he couldn’t remember anything. What if he would never be the same boy that he was before ever again? No. She refused to believe that. There had to be some way that Nick could understand her.  “If you can understand what I’m saying, sweetheart, blink your eyes…” 

Nick’s mind was hazy. He was trying to concentrate. She was his mum. She was going to protect him. There was no reason to be scared.  Did he know where he was?  Hospital….yes that’s right. He’s in the hospital.  The sterile smell, white walls and bright lights suddenly began to make sense now.   “Blink, darling…”  Blink? He could do that.   Nick blinked his eyes.  Sarah squeezed his hand tightly as she felt the tears drip down her face.  Nick could hear her. He understood her.  The doctor arrived momentarily. He shone a bright torch in Nick’s eyes which he did not like at all. He squinted his eyes closed as it burned through his corneas. The doctor asked him him a bunch of questions but he couldn’t focus. He was able to follow the doctors moving finger with his eyes, he blinked once for yes and twice for no in response to his questions but all he wanted to do was close his eyes and sleep. He was so tired. He still didn’t know exactly why he was here but he felt safe. His mum was here and she made it very clear that she wasn’t going to be going anywhere so that was enough for him as he allowed his eyes to droop shut once again as he fell in to a deep slumber.

Chapter Text

After getting Sarah’s message, Charlie and his friends tried to settle down and get a bit of sleep. Charlie’s mind wouldn’t quiet though. Nick had woken up! He had recognised Sarah, did that mean he’ll recognise him? He was desperate to get to the hospital and see him. He listened to the gentle snores and breathing of his friends as they all drifted off to sleep. Eventually, just before dawn,he finally fell asleep too.

Later that morning, after a delicious breakfast cooked up by Yan, which he managed to eat a reasonable amount of, Charlie was once again back at the hospital. He felt more nervous than he had in days. Sarah had told him he was welcome to visit any time and that Diane and David would be there at some point too. He liked Diane, she treated him like part of the family. He was still very wary of David, however he’d seen a different side to him this past week. He was so shaken up about what had happened to his brother. He wasn’t about to become friends with him or anything, but Charlie recognised that David was carrying a lot of regret about hisrelationship with his brother.

Charlie took a deep breath and opened the door to Nick’s room. The lights were down on the lowest setting and Sarah was sitting in the chair next to the bed. But Charlie’s eyes were immediately drawn to Nick. His face no longer obscured by the ventilator, he took in all the bruising and markings on his boyfriend’s beautiful face. There was a hint of pain on his features, which Charlie found oddly comforting. It meant he was feeling something for the first time in over a week. “Charlie darling,” Sarah got out of her chair to hug him.

“Morning Sarah,” Charlie pulled away and went to sit on the opposite side of the bed, immediately picking up Nick’s hand and lacing their fingers together. “How’s he doing?”

Sarah smiled at him gently,” he’s doing really well. He woke up again once more. He definitely knows who I am. He hasn’t spoken yet but he blinked to show he understood. The doctors have said he will be in and out for a few days as his body is completely exhausted.” She stroked Nick’s cheek, “ he’s just going to need time. “

Charlie squeezed Nicks hand and leaned close to him, “Hi babe, it’s me…..Charlie” he glanced up at Sarah who gave him an understanding smile. “I’ll let you have a few minutes with him while I go and freshen up a bit.” She knew it was important for Charlie to process this news. She left and closed the door quietly.

Charlie took a deep breath,” Nick, I love you so much. I’m so proud of you for fighting so hard to come back to us. I’d love to see those beautiful brown eyes of yours if you can open them for me?”

Nick could hear voices talking around him. His head still throbbed when he moved so he kept as still as possible. The haze was lifting from his mind but still his thoughts were all jumbled and confused. He knew his mum was here, he could hear her talking to someone. But there was another familiar voice too….he tried to put the puzzle back together but it was so hard when so many pieces were missing. He heard them asking him to open his eyes so he slowly blinked them open. He was met with the most beautiful blue eyes looking down at him. They were full of tears and he instinctively tried to bring his hand up to wipe them away but his hand was already being held, squeezed tightly by the boy above him.

“Oh my god,” Charlie couldn’t stop the tears from falling as he saw Nick open his eyes and blearily look at him. “Hi!” He looked at Nicks face, checking to see if he knew who he was. He just looked confused. Charlie’s heart sank. What if he didn’t remember him? “It’s me…Charlie, you’ve been in an accident babe, do you remember?” He looked desperately at Nick. Nick tried to take in the information. Charlie….of course….Charlie, his boyfriend. He couldn’t  remember a lot but he knew  Charlie like he knew his mum. He tried to speak but again the words just weren’t there. So he used all his energy to squeeze Charlie’s hand back.

Charlie felt a shock as he realised Nick was squeezing his hand. He looked at his face and he knew that Nick recognised him. He was trying to talk but only managing to make a few noises. “Shh, baby don’t try to talk. It’s ok,” he gently leaned over and kissed him on the lips. “I am so proud of you, Nick.”

Nick gave him a small smile, he felt safe with Charlie next to him. The door opened and Sarah came back in.

“He’s awake again?” She moved quickly to the bed side “Hello my darling,” Nick slowly moved his head to hers and tried to smile. It came out a little wonky but nobody cared. “Are you in any pain?” Nick gave a small nod. Sarah pressed the button for the nurse. “Ok baby, well get the nurse to give you something. Do you remember why you are here?” Nick wanted to answer but exhaustion just took him over and he closed his eyes drifting back to sleep.

Charlie let out a breath he hadn’t realised he was holding. Tears were pouring down his face, from relief, from nerves, he wasn’t sure. Sarah gave him a hug, “Did he say anything to you?” Charlie shook his head, “he tried but he couldn’t….he squeezed my hand though. I’m sure he knew who I was.”

Charlie stayed with Sarah at Nick’s side until lunchtime when his mum came to pick him up. Nick hadn’t woken up again, which Charlie was quietly disappointed about. He knew that Sarah was right , he just needed time. Charlie thought back to a week ago. There were times he didn’t think he’d ever see him open his eyes again. This was all progress, he just needed to have some patience.

Sarah was exhausted. She hadn’t had a chance to go home since Nick was taken off the ventilator, she was too frightened that she would miss something. If he woke up and she wasn’t there she would never forgive herself. She’d just have to power through on caffeine for a little while. A knock at the door startled her and she looked up to see Diane and David had arrived. She beckoned them both in with a smile.

Diane entered first, immediately wrapping her arms around Sarah. “Hi darling,” she pulled away and looked at Nick, seeing him without the ventilator for the first time. “Any progress?” She reached over and gave Nick a kiss on the cheek. “Hello my darling.”

David had sat himself in the chair usually occupied by Charlie. He couldn’t take his eyes off his brother. He looked so small, so pale. He was relieved to see the back of the ventilator, but somehow Nick looked even more fragile without it. “Hi Nick,” he stuttered awkwardly. One way conversations were tough.

Sarah looked at them both, “He woke up again for a minute when Charlie was here. He didn’t manage to say anything but he definitely recognised Charlie and he squeezed his hand. He nodded when I asked if he was in pain,” he voice broke, “but the nurses have upped his morphine and he’s been asleep ever since.”

“That’s a really good sign though?” Diane responded, “that he understood what you were saying?” Sarah nodded. She leaned over Nick and gently stroked his face.

“Baby, you have more visitors,” Nick just slept soundly. “Ok baby, you just wake up when you are ready. They would love to see you.”

David and Diane stayed for the afternoon keeping Sarah company. She still refused to go home but dozed in her chair. Diane chatted to Nick while David doom scrolled on his phone. It was approaching dinner time when David noticed that Nick had opened his eyes and was looking directly at him confusion etched onto his face. “Mum! He’s awake,” David put his phone down and looked at her for reassurance.

Sarah woke with a start and saw that he was indeed awake. “Hello baby,” Sarah took hold of Nick’s hand. He turned his head to look at her. Seeing his mum was comforting. He wasn’t sure who was on the other side of the bed. He noticed a woman next to his mum. She looked familiar too, her eyes were filled with tears as she spoke, “Nick, I’m so happy to see you awake. We’ve all been so worried about you.” Nick just stared at her. He tried to work out who he was looking at. She obviously knew him. Sensing his confusion Sarah spoke softly to him, “This is your brother David, and your Auntie Diane,” Nick slowly looked from one to the other. That sounded right, although he still couldn’t quite place them. He could see they were concerned that he hadn’t responded.

“Doesn’t he recognise us?” David was horrified. Was his brother actually going to come out of this with brain damage? Sarah tried to squash down her rising fear at the lack of a response from Nick.

“Do you remember Nick?” Nick tried hard to clear the fog in his brain. He took a breath and focused as much as he could with the thumping in his head. Yes, the thought, I definitely know them. He had snatches of memories of a dinner table with David, and of a swimming pool with Aunt Diane. He gave a small nod and smiled. Diane let out a sigh,

“Oh thank god,” she looked at Nick and gently touched his arm. “You gave me a fright!” Nick wanted to talk to them. He looked at his mum, his mouth open but the words just wouldn’t come. He could feel himself getting frustrated. Why couldn’t he get his words out?” Tears began to slip down his cheeks. He was trying to speak, but all he could produce was a groan.

“Hush baby,” Sarah soothed. “Don’t try to talk. You’ve made so much progress today sweetheart. You’ve done so well. Just rest and sleep. We will be here when you wake up.” Nick relaxed back into his pillow. His mum always knew best.

“The doctor says he’ll probably be like this for a few days. It’s hard to tell what’s going through his mind…” Sarah sighed. Oh, how she wanted to know. She was desperate to know what her baby was thinking. How scared he must be. Did he remember the accident? Was he still in lots of pain?  She shuddered at the very thought of her son being in pain and discomfort, but being completely unable to communicate.  Was there any other damage that they weren’t aware of?  She knew that Nick’s neck and spine were in tact after the accident as that had been a major concern of hers after watching too many episodes of casualty involving car accidents. Luckily, all of Nick’s scans so far had ruled out any damage to the neck or spine. A serious head injury though?? Would he ever recover properly? It scared her.  She glanced down at her sleeping son. If she could take it all away from him, oh she would. In a heartbeat.  She knew the doctors were taking the best care of him. The routine, hourly checks, keeping his fluids and pain medication topped up. He was being fed all the nutrients he required through a nasogastric tube that had been inserted into his stomach through his nose, post surgery.

“Mum??” She glanced over to David. Who was glancing at his little brother. His eye brows knitted together in concern.  She had never seen David look so small, so vulnerable before. It was just a shame that it had taken such a horrific accident for him to display his genuine concern for Nick. “Yeah?” She asked watching as he lifted his gaze from Nick and shifted it toward her.  “Is…Is Nick ever going to be the same again?”  He asked in a wobbly voice.   Sarah felt her eyes well up with tears again. How could she possibly answer a question that she genuinely did not know the answer to. Nobody did.   “I don’t know, sweetheart.” She replied.  “But I know for a fact that Nicky is trying his very best to get better.” She glanced down at her youngest as he slept.  “Aren’t you, my darling??”

Nick slept the remainder of the day.

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The next afternoon Sarah sat in the exact same chair in the exact same position in the exact same room that she had being doing day after day since Nick’s accident. Although she had changed her clothes and freshened up after the kind nurses had allowed her to use one of the hospital washrooms.  She was petrified of leaving the hospital room for any lengthy period of time as she didn’t want to miss a thing. What if Nick woke and was frightened that she wasn’t there? What if he spoke and she wasn’t there? What if….no. She wasn’t going to torture herself with the thoughts of something bad happening to Nick after they she turned with a big corner.  She had to keep positive.

She was aware of shuffling and looked down to see Nick rolling his head side to side as he woke up. He blinked a few times, trying to adjust to the light in the room. Even on the lowest of settings. He sometimes still found the light too much. His head ached all the time.   

“Hello, baby.” Sarah smiled as she bent down and kissed his forehead gently.  “You’ve just missed Auntie Diane. She had to go pick the twins up from school…” she said as she stroked his hand with her thumb.  Nick just stared up at her, his eyes still a blanket of confusion. But Sarah was almost certain that she could see the cogs turning as if Nick’s brain was working on overdrive.

Auntie Diane. Nick thought to himself. Yes. He remembered her. She was the kind lady that visited yesterday. She had brought him a little teddy bear dressed in a tiny England rugby kit, that was perched on the end of his bed.  Twins??? Oh yes, that’s right.  He remembered. His little cousins.  Lexie and Liam? No that wasn’t right…Leo. He understood. He swallowed trying to rid the dryness in his throat. It still felt raw and sore from where the breathing tube had been forced down it. Sarah watched Nick run his tongue along his dry lips.  “Thirsty, sweetheart?” She asked as she picked up the jug of water from the side. Nick had managed a few sips of water yesterday afternoon from the nurse.    Nick nodded his head softly.   Sarah poured a tiny amount in the cup and brought the straw up to Nick’s lips. He swallowed. Winced and swallowed again. He only drank a tiny amount, but it was definitely progress. She placed The cup down on the side about to pick out another book to read to Nick. She had noticed how content he seemed to be when she would read to him.  She picked one up from the side and sat back down when she heard a quiet, hoarse voice from beside her.

“M…mum…”

Sarah gasped, dropping the book in her lap and reaching over to grasp his hands. Tears sprang to her eyes as she looked at his bruised face.

Oh baby,” she tried to stifle a sob, “you clever boy. You did it!” She lent down and kissed him on the cheek. “Can you say it again for me?”

Nick looked at her for a while, his brain trying to process the words, then repeated  with a small smile, “Mum.”  Sarah laughed and hugged him.

“Yes! I’m so proud of you!! I knew you were in there. “ Sarah was so excited it felt like when Nick was just a baby and said his first word. This was even more special. She’d been beginning to think that maybe he wasn’t going to be able to speak. Yes it was only one word but right now it felt like a miracle.

At that moment the door opened and Charlie poked his head round.

“Charlie!” Sarah exclaimed. “He spoke! Nick….he just said ‘mum’ clear as day!” Charlie’s face broke into a grin.”seriously? Oh my god!” He hugged Sarah, then seeing that Nick was still awake he leaned over to him and have him a kiss. “Nick, babe you are amazing. I love you so much.”

Nick slowly looked from his mum to Charlie. They both looked so proud of him. He was still finding it hard to follow what they were saying, and there were so many words that just felt out of reach for him at the moment. But he knew that he needed to try to speak to Charlie. His brain searched for the right words.

“Hi,” he whispered. Charlie didn’t try to hide his tears as he replied “Hi.” Charlie rested his head as gently as he could on Nicks chest. He was completely overwhelmed. This was the best news, he couldn’t wait to tell the rest of the gang. He felt Nick’s hand on his head and realised that he was gently stroking his curls. He lifted his head and saw Nick’s confused expression.

“These are happy tears, I promise. I love you so so much.”

“Love….you,” Nick sighed. Speaking those words had exhausted him. Sarah and Charlie watched as he drifted back off to sleep.

“I think he’s going to be ok,” Charlie whispered, looking hopefully at Sarah who was barely holding it together.

“I think you are right darling,” Sarah rubbed her face to dry her tears. “I think he’s going to need a lot of time. But he’s definitely still in there.”

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Two more days passed. Nick continued to get stronger. Each day he would sleep a little less and he had been speaking a little  more. He was still struggling with putting full sentences together, but Sarah and Charlie did not care. They had their Nick back. He was alive and he had defied all the odds that had been stacked to against him. He still had a lengthy recovery a head of him but the determination he was showing, was so inspiring.

Sarah entered the room. It was 3 in the afternoon. She had gone home, showered and had a quick nap whilst David had offered to sit with Nick.  When she questioned her eldest on if Nick had been very talkative when she was away. He just shook his head.  Sarah sighed, although she had been noticing a bit of a pattern forming. When she was alone with Nick, he would try his hardest to use his words, even getting frustrated with himself when they didn’t come out right. Same with when Charlie visited or Diane, but whenever David was around, it was as if Nick didn’t even try. He didn’t even put any effort in. It was as if he didn’t want to.  Sarah said her goodbyes to David who muttered a ‘see you later’ to Nick before gathering up his belongings and leaving the room. Nick didn’t even bat an eyelash although his eyes did brighten up when he saw Sarah.

“Hello, baby.” Sarah chirped as she kissed his forehead gently.  The bandage surrounding Nick’s head had been removed yesterday as the stitches seemed to be healing well.  Nick smiled at Sarah as she sat down beside the bed.  “How are you feeling today?” Sarah asked, hoping that he would respond to her in more than just a few words.   “Okay…” was his only response.   “Are you in much pain?” She asked.   “Little bit…” Nick replied. It was as if he was struggling to focus, today. So Sarah decided she wasn’t going to force it.  Nick would communicate with them in his own way, in his own time. She just knew they had to remain patient.  She sipped her take away coffee and pulled out the book she had been reading. This had become normal routine when she visited in the afternoon. They would chat very minimally as she sipped her coffee and then she would read some chapters of her book usually whilst Nick, slept. It becomes clear after about 10 minutes of reading that Nick wasn’t going to go to sleep. Wasn’t he tired? This was a good sign then, yeah? If he was feeling more alert today.   Sarah popped the bookmark in between the pages and placed it down on the side, before glancing at her son.  Nick’s eyebrows were knitted together as if he was in deep concentration. He gently chewed on his lip as he stared off in to space.  “Nicky?”

“Nick?” Sarah tried again watching as he snapped out of whatever trance he was in.  “What are you thinking about, eh?” She asked.     She watched as Nick’s eyebrows furrowed again as he glanced at his mum and then at the monitors beside his bed. He then glanced at Sarah again.   “Car…” he mumbled.  Sarah’s eyes widened.  Was Nick remembering the accident?  He looked so scared and upset.  She reached out and gently took his hand in hers.  “What do you mean, sweetheart?” She asked him softly.    “We…we crashed the car…” he breathed out.  It was all coming back to him. The screeching tires, the grip he had on the steering wheel as he tried to swerve out of the path of the oncoming car. He could hear Sarah screaming and the sound of the cars colliding and the glass smashing all around him. Pain. He remembers feeling instant pain as his head smashed against the wheel before he was plunged in to a blanket of darkness.

Nick started to breathe more quickly reliving the panic of the accident. Was this his fault? Had he done something wrong? He looked at his mum with tears in his eyes,”I’m sorry,” he whispered. Sarah took his hand and gave it a squeeze, “Whatever for darling?” Nick glanced up at the almost healed cut on his mums head, he was finally putting the pieces together. She’d been hurt in the accident too, and he was the one driving. “My fault,” he managed to say before tears poured down his cheeks.

Sarah couldn’t quite believe what she was hearing and wasn’t going to let Nick think he was responsible for one single second.

“Absolutely not,” she exclaimed loudly. “You listen to me Nicky. We were hit by a car that drove into our lane. You did NOTHING wrong. You tried your hardest to avoid the car but it wasn’t your fault sweetheart. And I’m fine, I promise I wasn’t hurt, just a little cut from the glass.” Sarah hesitated. Should she tell him that the driver was drunk? The police had charged him with causing a collision whilst under the influence and he had pleaded guilty. She decided for now, that Nick had enough to think about. She would tell him when he was stronger. She watched Nick slowly absorb the news. His sobs quietened down.

A little while later the doctor appeared to do the daily checks. He pulled up a chair and sat by Sarah. Nick watched him curiously.

“Well Nicholas. I am extremely pleased with your recovery so far young man. You have come so far. We don’t see any reason for you to stay in the intensive care unit any more so we are going to find you a bed up on the high dependency unit. That way you can still be monitored regularly but you’ll be able to have more visitors and we will get you up and about. How does that sound?” Sarah was thrilled. This was a huge step in the right direction to getting her Nicky home. Nick smiled softly. He’d like to see his friends. He wasn’t sure how long it had been.

A bed was found for Nick later that day and he was wheeled up to his new floor. He didn’t need as many wires monitoring him any more and it felt good to have more freedom in his arms and hands. His mum brought him pyjamas from home and his blanket from his bed. Nick felt brighter and more alert than he had since he arrived. Sarah was so happy to see his mood improve.

“Would you like me to ask some of your friends if they can visit?” She looked  at him to gauge his reaction. He looked worried. “Baby, they just want to come and see you, they won’t expect you to be very chatty.” Nick nodded and Sarah quickly sent off a text to Charlie.

Sarah: hi darling. I was wondering if you could arrange some of Nicks friends to come and visit for a little bit tomorrow? I think he’s a little nervous about seeing them but it would do him good. Visiting hours on the new ward are 2-4 in the afternoon.

Charlie read the message as he was walking out of school with Tao and Isaac.

“Sarah just text,” the two boys turned to look at him,. “ she wants you guys to come and visit Nick tomorrow? He was moved to the HDU and is allowed visitors that aren’t family.” Charlie had been so excited when sarah had given him that good news.

Tao and Issac both agreed and Charlie text the rest of the paris squad when he got home.

Charlie: guys! Anyone up for coming to see Nick tomorrow????

Elle:omg! Seriously? He’s allowed visitors?

Tara: that’s the best news ever! Of course we do!

Charlie: yep! Visiting hours are 2-4. If we all go together, maybe we could see him in small groups? I don’t want to overwhelm him.

Darcy: how is he doing Charlie?

Charlie: he’s so much better but he is still sleeping a lot and in some pain. He finds it hard to speak in long sentences. He’ll probably just listen a lot.

Darcy: that’s ok I am chatty enough for all of us!

Tara: ain’t that the truth!

Charlie: let’s meet at the hospital entrance at 2

Charlie put his phone down with a smile. Things were looking up.

The next afternoon the paris squad gathered at the hospital. They were laden with cards, Darcy had a large balloon and they had a gift basket stuffed full of Nick’s favourite snacks. Charlie smiled as he approached them, “guys this is so nice he’s gonna love it.” He eyed the snacks. Nick had had his feeding tube removed but didn’t have much of an appetite. “He might not eat much but he’ll be really grateful.” Charlie led them up to Nick’s room. “Let’s go in two groups. Sarah said he’s awake but anxious.”

It was agreed that Charlie, Tao and Isaac would go first, followed by Tara, Darcy and Elle. Charlie knocked on the door and they went in.

Nick was propped up in his bed. His mum was next to him. He was nervous to see his friends, which he knew was silly but he couldn’t help it. What if he couldnt find the right words when he was talking to them? What if he couldn’t follow the conversation? His brain just didn’t always seem to cooperate any more.

However one look at his friends anxious faces in the doorway and he broke into a wide smile.

“Hi guys,” he said slowly “thanks for coming.” Tao and Isaac gave him a cheery wave and came to sit by him. They were shocked at how poorly he still looked. The cut on his forehead was larger than they were expecting. He still had yellowing bruising all across his face. He looked tired and pale. But he was smiling at them, which felt like a miracle.

“Nick, it’s so good to see you. We’ve really missed you at school,” Isaac said softly. Sarah smiled at him, he was such a lovely boy. She slipped out the room to give them some time together. Nick listened quietly while the boys caught him up on the latest gossip and drama at school. He tried to keep up but he found the words slipping away from him. It made his head hurt. Charlie noticed, of course, and gently took his hand.

“Nick? Are you ok babe?” Nick looked at Charlie who was smiling so caringly at him.

He nodded. “Just….confused.” He smiled apologetically.

Tao and Isaac exchanged worried glances, “God, sorry Nick. We’ve been talking non stop.

“S’ok” Nick said sleepily. “It’s good to see you. Sorry I’m not good company.”

“Don’t be daft,” Charlie scoffed. “Even asleep you are better company than Tao” he teased.

“Er,…..rude!!!” Tao laughed back. The boys decided to let the girls come and say hello as it looked like Nick needed to rest. As they swapped over in the hallway, Elle looked at Tao, “was he ok?”

“Yeah, he’s really tired. So maybe don’t talk too much. I think he needs to rest.”

The girls nodded seriously and went into his room. They don’t stay long and soon it was time for them to leave. They hugged him gently and promised to visit again really soon.

“We’re so glad you are doing ok,” Tara said,giving his hand a squeeze. . We were so worried about you.”

“Thanks guys,” Nick said softly. “I’m sorry I scared you all.” Tara gave him a teary smile. They left and quietly closed the door behind them. Darcy was noticeably quiet.

“You ok Darcy?” Charlie touched her shoulder. Darcy looked at him with tears in her eyes. “He nearly died,” she sobbed. “It’s just not fair. Nick is the kindest most decent guy in the world. It’s just not fair.” Charlie held her, joined by Tara and then the rest of the gang.

Sarah was watching the group with tears in her eyes.

“No Darcy,” she said and the group quickly looked at her. “ it’s not fair. But we can’t change what happened. He’s alive, he’s awake, he’s making so much progress. We just need to be patient with him and be there for him. He’s got a long recovery ahead of him but with friends like you all, I’m sure he’ll get through this.” She held out her arms for Darcy and gave her a fierce hug.

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A couple of days later Nick was sitting up in bed. He was trying to read a book. His physio had suggested it to help him with his concentration. He couldn’t look at screens, they made his head hurt more. But books were ok, if only he could focus on the words and remember what he had read. It made his brain hurt and frustrated him.

After reading the same paragraph 3 times and still not understanding it, he threw the book down in annoyance and swore at himself.

“Is now a good time?” Nick looked up. It took him a moment to realise who it was standing in his doorway. There, with a slightly concerned look on her face after witnessing his outburst, was Coach Singh. Still in her sports clothes, she had obviously come straight from school to see him.

“Yeah,” he replied sheepishly, putting the book on the table, “sorry….hi Coach,” coach Singh smiled at him as she came over and sat down.

“Don’t apologise,” she grinned, “If you are getting frustrated like that you must be feeling a bit better?” Nick shrugged. He knew he’d made amazing progress but he still felt like he was nowhere near back to normal. The doctors had told him it was going to take time, but he was so ready for things to be back to how they were.

“I won’t stay long, I know you need to rest but I wanted to come and see how you are and to tell you that it doesn’t matter how long it takes. Your spot on the rugby team will be here for you when you are ready to come back.”

Nick gave her a smile, “thanks coach…..” he forced himself to focus as he replied “that means a lot. I really want to get back to rugby.”

Coach gave his shoulder a squeeze. She had been so worried about him when the staff were told about his accident. She knows teachers aren’t meant to have favourites but it was impossible not to be impressed with Nick. He was an amazing captain of the team, kind, a role model to others. The way he had navigated coming out at school along with Charlie and encouraging other boys in the school to become more inclusive was inspiring. She chatted to him for a while, making him laugh with her stories about the games he had missed. He was even more determined to get better, to get back to school and to his friends and rugby.

It was another week before Nick was finally released from the hospital. His mum came to help pack up his things and say goodbye to the staff that had saved his life. There were no words enough to thank them for what they had done. They had achieved a miracle in her eyes. She and Nick walked slowly and carefully to the exit of the hospital. He was still unsteady on his feet and had to concentrate but the fresh air that hit him as he left the hospital felt amazing. He would never take fresh air for granted again. He felt a jolt of panic as he sat in the passenger seat of the car, but he forced himself to breathe through it. He couldn’t be afraid of cars because of one reckless driver. His mum had finally told him that the other driver was drunk. He hadn’t really processed that, he had put in away in a box in his mind to deal with further in the future. As they parked in the driveway Nick could hear Nellie barking loudly. “I think someone is happy to see you,” Sarah smiled at him. She opened the front door and helped Nick to sit on the sofa. “You ready?”

“Yes!” Nick grinned, his mum opened the kitchen door and a blur of furr came racing across the hallway and jumped straight onto his lap. Within seconds Nick was covered in dog fur and doggy kisses. “Carefully Nellie!” Sarah exclaimed! But Nick didn’t mind. He’d missed his girl so much. He was so happy to be home, back where he belonged. It would be a little while longer before he returned to school but right now he didn’t care. He was home with his family and Charlie was on his way over. Life was good.

Chapter Text

The last time Nick Nelson had an ear infection, he must’ve been about 11 or 12. It has been absolutely horrible, right in the middle of half term as well and he was stuck indoors, in pain and having to take the horrific neon yellow liquid antibiotic.  He remembered the pain and that’s why he knew as soon as he woke up this morning with a sharp pain in his left ear that it wasn’t a good sign. Surely he’d just gotten water in it whilst washing his hair last night, right??  Nick grumbled to himself as his alarm sounded for like the third time and he reached out his hand to silence it, as much as he wanted to hit snooze again, he knew it was only a matter of time before Sarah marched up the stairs and dragged his backside out of bed.  He rolled on to his back and groaned heavily. He usually didn’t mind so much getting up for school, but today, he wanted to bury himself under his duvet. His ear was aching, he had a sharp headache and he just didn’t feel good.  

“Nicky are you up???” 

Nick groaned as he pulled himself out of bed. He knew right away that was a mistake because as soon as he was on his feet, he suddenly felt very lightheaded and woozy and off balanced that he crashed right back down on to his bed as a spell of dizziness whooshed over him. He then realised that the ache in his left ear was also in his right ear but more prominently so. He winced as he touched his hand to his ear. It hurt, a lot.  “Nick??”  He heard his mum calling again. Her voice getting closer as he heard her footsteps on the stairs. She appeared at his doorway a few seconds later, she frowned as she noticed that he was sat on his bed, still dressed in his pyjamas.  “Nick! It’s quarter past 8. We’ll need to leave shortly if you want a lift-“ she then stoppped as she noticed her son’s face creased in pain.  “Sweetheart? Are you alright?” “Mum.” Nick said glancing up to her. “My ears hurt.” He said as he gently rubbed his right ear.  

Sarah sighed. That didn’t sound good at all, the last time Nick had complained of sore ears. It has escalated in to a full blown ear infection, accompanied by a chest infection. He had been so unwell. It had happened short time after his twelve birthday and during half term.  Thank god for liquid antibiotics. Poor Nick had been cooed up in bed for days, feeling so poorly as all his friends enjoyed being off school and he was stuck in doors with a raging fever. Sarah moved over and perched on the edge of the bed and motioned for Nick to tilt his head to the side so that she could inspect his ear.  She used the torch on his phone so she could have a closer look.  “Yep. Looks like an infection to me.” She tutted, moving Nicks head gently so that she could check his other ear.   His right ear definitely looked worse, the skin around the ear looked red and irritated, the inner ear was inflamed and it looked a little weepy.  Sarah placed the back of her hand on Nick’s forehead. He was really warm.  “I’ll call the school.” Sarah informed her son and beckoning him to get back in to bed.  Nick shook his head fiercely before wincing as the movement made his ears hurt even more. “You’ve got that meeting this morning.” He reminded her. He remembered how Sarah has been talking about how she had a scheduled meeting with her manager about a possible promotion. It was important but she was a mother and her child was sick. Nick would always come first.  “You have to go, mum.” Nick replied. He got his stubbornness from his mother.  “This is important. You deserve this promotion!”  “You’re not well, darling.” Sarah sighed as she brushed Nick’s fringe back with her fingers.   “They’ll be other promotions.” She said.  

Nick shook his head again. “You have worked so hard for this one. I can go to school.” He said as he swung back the duvet.  “I’ll be fine.” He said as he got on to his feet again, this time around felt worse as he could practically feel the room spinning around him as he was unsteady on his feet.  “Woah.” Sarah said as she reached out to steady him from tumbling over.  “Sit down, baby.” She soothed as she knelt down in front of him.  “You’re in no shape or form to be going to school, Nicky.” She said softly, knowing Nick was about to protest again, she continued.  “I don’t think your Auntie Diane has anything on this morning after dropping the twins of, I’ll give her a ring and see if she could sit with you, at least until after my meeting.” She suggested. “How does that sound?”  Nick rolled his eyes. He loves his auntie Diane dearly but he sometimes felt as if Sarah forgot that he was sixteen years old but he also knew there was absolutely no way that she was going to leave him alone, especially not when he’s sick.   “Ok.” He agreed. He just didn’t want her missing her work meeting, she worked far too hard.    

Sarah left the room and returned a few seconds later with a digital thermometer in hand and her mobile phone. She slipped the device under Nick’s tongue before he even had a chance to protest before using her mobile to dial her sister’s number and waiting for it to ring.  Sarah left the room briefly to speak to Diane while Nick slumped back against his pillows with the thermometer sticking out his mouth. He felt so dizzy and rubbish and the more he thought about it the more his ears throbbed. He leaned over and grabbed his phone from the side where it was still plugged in. He fired off a quick text to Charlie to let him know he was off sick today and then tossed it next to him on the bed as the thermometer beeped. Sarah came back, pocketing her phone. “Aunt Diane will be here at about 9 and is more than happy to stay here until I get back from my meeting.” Nick was relieved. He really didn’t want his mum to miss out on a promotion because of him. “Now let’s check this temperature…..38.9. Oh baby, that’s a bit high!” Sarah felt his forehead again. Let me go and get you some medicine, then you can get settled. Do you want to stay up here or camp out on the sofa?” Nick thought about it. The tv downstairs was so much bigger but he was cosy in his bed and he still felt dizzy. 

“I think I’ll stay here and nap a bit,” he looked up at his mum and she gave him a worried smile. “Ok baby. I’m going to phone the doctors as soon as they open at half eight to try and get you an appointment.” Nick groaned. He hated going to the doctors. “Now come on Nick, you know you need antibiotics if you have an ear infection.”“Yeah I know,” he mumbled. “ it’s just always so busy there and we end up waiting for ages to be seen. Plus it’s full of sick people,” he pouted. Sarah laughed at him, “yes darling….sick people including you!”

Sarah left him to rest while she gathered up supplies for him from the kitchen. A hot cup of tea, some buttered toast, liquid paracetamol and a hot compress for his ears. The clock showed 8.30 so she quickly phoned up the doctors. Number 20 in the queue. Sarah sighed. It never used to be so hard to see a GP.  She was still on hold after she’d been back up to Nick and given him everything he needed. Finally the hold music stopped and the phone started to ring. “Hi, this is Sarah Nelson I’m calling to book an appointment for my son Nicholas.” “Oh I’m sorry,” the receptionist replied cheerily, “ we are full up for appointments today.” Sarah sighed again, she knew it wasn’t the receptionists fault but Nick really needed to be seen. When Nick was a baby you could always get an appointment for the same day but lately it was just impossible. “Is there no way you can squeeze him in? He’s in a lot of pain from earache.” She tried not to get agitated, but Nick needed to see a doctor. “I’m really sorry but we only have emergency appointments now. If he’s struggling I suggest taking him to the walk in clinic on Bridge Street. Do you know it?” Sarah audibly tutted. “Yes I know it, thanks for your help.” She hung up without waiting for a response and groaned. The walk in clinic was much worse than waiting in the GP surgery. Sometimes you could wait for hours. Nick was not going to like this. 

The doorbell jolted her out of her thoughts and she let Diane in. “Thanks for coming Di,” Sarah gave her sister a hug. “Twins get off ok?”  Diane grimaced at her. “The usual chaos. They have swimming today so it was a last minute hunt for goggles, towels…. I literally chucked them through the school gate with seconds to spare!” Sarah gave her a sympathetic smile. She remembered those days well. “How’s the patient doing?” Sarah sighed for what felt like the hundredth time that day, “he’s up in bed. His ears are really sore and he’s dizzy and feeling rubbish. I just got off the phone with the GP…” she rolled her eyes. “Obviously no appointments today. They said to take him to the walk in clinic if he needs to be seen today.” Diane tutted. “Typical! Want me to take him this morning?” Sarah smiled at her, god she was lucky to have her sister so close.  “Would you mind? I really need to get going for work, I’ve got my chat with my boss about my promotion at 10….” she was so thankful that she was here.  “Of course I don’t….get out of here! You will be fabulous. They would be stupid not to give it to you.” Sarah gave a nervous laugh, “we will see. I’ll just pop up and say bye to Nick, then I’ll be off.”

Sarah quickly climbed up the stairs and peaked into Nick’s room. He hadn’t touched his toast but she could see he had drunk his tea. He was buried under his duvet with just the top of his hair sticking out. Sarah gently sat down on the bed next to him and he peered out of the duvet bundle at her. “Nick try to eat some toast darling.” He just grumbled at her. “I’m sorry baby but I couldn’t get an appointment at the doctors so Diane is going to take you to the walk in clinic.” She ignored the groan that came from the duvet. “Can you get dressed for me? It’ll be quieter if you go there now.” Nick huffed. He hated the walk in clinic even more. He’d been there once before when he sprained his ankle and school had suggested he get it looked at. They had waited on uncomfortable plastic chairs for hours before he was finally seen. The thought of doing,that when he felt poorly was not a pleasant one.  “Please Nick?” Sarah could sense his reluctance. “I’m not leaving you unless you agree to go. If it’s an ear infection it could get much worse. You need to get checked out.” Nick immediately felt guilty. He knew how important today was for his mum. “Yeah ok,” he relented. “I’ll go.” Sarah gave him a hug and kiss and promised to be back as soon as her meeting was over. 

Nick took a deep breath and forced himself into a sitting position. His head was so dizzy and his ears were so sore. He made his way blearily to his wardrobe and grabbed some comfy clothes. After a quick trip to the bathroom to brush his teeth he slowly  made his way  down the stairs, gripping the banister tight so he didn’t fall.  Diane took in Nick’s dishevelled appearance. “Oh dear, you are feeling rough aren’t you,” she gave him a hug. “Come on, I’ll drive us there. Hopefully it won’t be too busy.”

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It was very busy. Nicks eyes scanned the room, there were about 20 people waiting already, and the room was full of noise. Coughing children, sneezing, people who looked green and like they might throw up at any moment. The noise was making his ears throb even more. He found a couple of empty chairs in the corner and slumped down on one of them. He put his hood up to protect his ears and tucked his knees up to his chest. Diane came to sit with him, she gave his knee a squeeze. “Chin up Nick, I just spoke to the receptionist. This is actually not too bad. There’s a few doctors on call today so it shouldn’t be too long. Do you want a cup of tea from the vending machine?” Nick wrinkled his nose in disgust. Vending machine tea was the worst. He shook his head and pulled out his phone to see if Charlie had replied. 

Charlie : oh no what’s wrong?? Form will be so boring without you!!

Nick glanced at the clock. 9.42 Charlie would be in his first lesson by now so he wouldn’t reply but he decided to send a text anyway.

Nick: I have earache in both ears. Mum thinks it’s an infection so I’m at the walk in clinic with Auntie Diane. Save me Charlie, it’s hell in here!

Nick watched as dots appeared to show Charlie was typing. What was he doing checking his phone at school? Little rule breaker! 

Charlie: earache is the worst! I wanna give you a hug so bad. 

Nick: char you’ll get into trouble texting in class! You rebel, you! And yes please to a hug. I think im dying. I need you. Skip school and come cuddle meeeee!!

Charlie: there’s my dramatic little poorly baby. 

Nick: oy! Be nice to me , I’m in pain!

Charlie: awwww I’m sorry. Shall I come over after school and kiss it better?

Nick: yes please

Charlie: I’d better get off my phone, if I get a detention I won’t be able to come over! Love you baby. Hope you get to see a doctor soon.

Nick: love you xxxxxxx 

Diane watched Nick typing on his phone with a soft smile on her face. He was obviously texting Charlie based on the dopey grin he was currently sporting. She loved how open he was with his affection now. 

“Nicholas Nelson?” A doctor appeared at the end of the waiting room. Nick jumped up, then sat back down as his head began to spin. The doctor looked over at them. “This way please….” Diane helped Nick to his feet and kept a hand on his elbow as they made their way to the doctor’s room. Nick focused on his feet and let her guide him there. Why was he so dizzy? Once inside, Nick gave a brief description of his symptoms and the doctor did all the usual checks. He was as gentle as he could be when examining Nick’s ears but still Nick hissed with pain as the instrument was poked into his sore ears.  “Well, they are definitely both infected,” the doctor concluded. “ I expect the dizziness is linked to the ear infections. Your ears are responsible for a lot of your balance so anything that upsets your ears can affect your stability.” Oh, that made sense I guess, Nick thought. The doctor wrote up a prescription for antibiotics and some ear drops. “Just rest up for a few days and you should be right as rain.”“Thanks,” Nick stood up slowly and they made their way back to the car.  “I’ll pop and get this medicine while you wait in the car,” Diane opened the passenger door and he climbed in gratefully. “Want anything else?” “No thanks….thank you for taking me.” Diane smiled at him. “It’s no trouble, you are  much easier than the twins!” She chuckled as she closed the door and walked up to the pharmacy. 

Nick clipped his seatbelt in to place when he got in to the car, waiting as his Auntie Diane went to collect his prescription. He felt absolutely exhausted just from the small walk from the walk in clinic to the car. He couldn’t believe how tired he was. His ears were throbbing, despite the doctor being as gentle as possible as he poked around with the medical instruments to get a closer look, it had just made them hurt so much more.  Trust him. He couldn’t just have one ear infection. He had to be dramatic and have infections in both ears. Double the pain. Great.  He glanced at as he took it from his hoody pocket, noticing that he had another message from Charlie, telling him to let him know what the doctor said. He quickly typed out a response.  

Nick: Hey! Just out of the clinic, you’ll never believe this….DOUBLE ear infection!!☹️ I can’t do things simply, can I???  Just waiting on Auntie Di getting my antibiotics…I swear to god it better be the liquid kind because there’s no way in hell I’m swallowing any sort of massive pills. The ones I had last time were like horse tranquillisers 💊 I’d much rather be in pain.  Anyway…how’s school without me? Hope you’re not missing me too much?? 

Nick then shoved his phone back in his pocket and leaned his head against the car window. The cool glass felt amazing against his feverish skin. He moaned softly as he closed his eyes. He was so so tired.  

Diane stood in the queue in the pharmacy. The line was only 3 people long but it was taking absolute ages. She hadn’t even handed the prescription in yet. She took the wait an opportunity to quickly update her sister on what the doctor had said.  

Diane: Hi Sarah. We’re just out of the walk in clinic. Nick’s got an infection in both ears as we suspect. Bless him. No wonder he’s in so much pain. The doctors prescribed Amoxicillin. I’m just in the pharmacy now and instructed plenty of bed rest. We’ve just to keep an eye on the fever and ensure it doesn’t go above 39.5 or we’ve to visit urgent care. Hopefully the antibiotics will bring that down.  I don’t have plans this afternoon so I’ll sit with him until you’re home. Terry’s picking the kids up today anyway.  Good luck for your meeting.  You will absolutely smash it!! Xx 

She then put her phone in her bag as she reached the front of the line. She handed the prescription over and requested it to be liquid form as she knew her nephew and knew he hated swallowing pills. She remembered the last time Nick had needed antibiotics. They had giving him them in pill for and Sarah had to crush them up and practically force feed them to Nick. It had been an ordeal so she was relieved when the kind receptionist smiled and said that wasn’t a problem.  Diane busied herself as she waited by picking up a few extra bits for her nephew. She picked up another bottle of children’s paracetamol as Sarah had mentioned that that she had given Nick the last of it this morning and it would help reduce his temperature..   “I’m so sorry.” The kind lady from before behind the pharmacy desk spoke up.  “I’m afraid we have ran of the liquid amoxicillin and it’s just the tablet form that we have in stock.” She said apologetically.  “I did ringing a few other pharmacy’s nearby but they’re in the same boat..” she continued.  “Would you like me to just go ahead and make the prescription up with the pills or I can try phoning some other locations further out?”    Diane glanced at the lady. She was sweet and so helpful but the nearest pharmacy apart from the ones she has called were at least a 30 minute drive out.   “Thank you for trying, I’ll just take the tablets, please.”  The kind lady smiled and nodded.  “Get him to swallow them with some fruit juice. That’s what I do with my own kids, piece of cake.”  She said before heading in to the back to make up the prescription.  Diane sighed as to shelf. She clearly didn’t know her nephew. She knew she and Sarah were going to have a real fight on their hands, trying to get Nick to take his medication. She knew the ear drops were going to be bad enough. Wait until Nick found out about this.   It was another 5 minutes before Diane returned to the car. She unlocked her car, popping the little pharmacy bag into the glove compartment.  She glanced at her sleeping nephew in the passenger side.  Poor kid. She could tell by the reddened skin around his right ear as she couldn’t see his left from the way he was slumped against the window, that it looked painful She felt her phone vibrate and noticed she had a message from Sarah in reply to the one she had sent. 

Sarah: Poor Nicky. I had a feeling that both ears were infected.  He’s not had an ear infection since that one he had in year 7. Poor thing was sick as a dog.  Hopefully they’re able to give you the liquid antibiotic. I know there’s been a shortage of it because of that recent outbreak of strep in primary school children.  Thank you so much for today, Di. You’re a life saver. Will you try and get Nicky to eat something? He wouldn’t touch his breakfast. I know he feels miserable but I need him to try, even a few bites of toast. I’m just heading to my meeting now and then I have a few business calls to make. I should hopefully be hopefully be home around 2pm xx 

She read the message and sighed she didn’t want to get Sarah all worked up before her meeting so she decided to leave out the bit about the antibiotics and just sent back a brief reply before turning the key in the ignition and staring up the car as she took the short drive back to her sisters house.  “Nick?” Diane called gently as she parked the car in the drive.  Nick didn’t stir an inch.  “Nick?” She called a little louder as she gently shook his shoulder.  “We’re home.” She announced as he let out a groan.  Nick blinked his eyes open as he rubbed the sleep out of them. It room him a moment to realise where he was and what was going on. That’s right. Walk in clinic. Pharmacy. Double ear infection. He groaned again as he unclipped his seatbelt and followed his auntie inside.  He walked slowly as he still felt very dizzy.    “Why don’t you go get back in to your pyjamas and I’ll make some tea?” Diane suggested as they stepped in to the hallway. She greeted Nellie and sat Nick’s prescription on the little table, along with her keys.  Nick mumbled a little ‘kay’ as he trudged up the stairs. Nellie, hot on his heels as if she could sense something was wrong with her big brother.   Diane decided not to mention the mix up with the antibiotics, just yet.  

Nick stripped out of his clothes and re-dressing in plaid pyjamas trousers and a bed t-shirt before grabbing the throw blanket from the edge of his bed and wrapping it around his shoulders burrito style before heading downstairs to the living room.  Bless his Auntie Diane. She had arranged the cushions and blanket from the sofa in to a little comfy bed set up and had the Netflix Home Screen set up on the TV screen.  Nick flopped down on the sofa as Nellie hopped up beside him. He smiled we he ruffled her fur. “Who’s a good girl, eh?” He cooed. He glanced up as his auntie entered the room carrying a mug of steaming tea and 2 slices of buttered toast on a plate.  “Here you go, sweetheart.” She smiled.  Nick gratefully accepted the cup of tea but turned his nose up in disgust at the toast,  causing his auntie to laugh. “Oh come on Nick.” She sighed. “I’m not hungry.” Nick pouted. He wasn’t lying. He had zero appetite. He felt a little sick but that was probably due to his balance being all over the place.  “I know you’re not honey.” Diane replied.  “But your mum wants you to try and eat a little.” She tried to reason with him.  “Please? Just for me…” she gave him her cheesiest grin.  Nick couldn’t help but roll his eyes but he reluctantly picked up one slice of toast and nibbled on the edge of it.  In the end he managed about 3 quarters of a slice. Diane wasn’t going to force him to eat any more. She knew her nephew and she knew he normally ate like a gannet so he must be feeling pretty lousy if he wasn’t hungry.  “Good lad.” She said as she placed the plate on side and went to fetch her own cup of tea and Nick’s prescription.    Nick glanced at his phone and noticed he had multiple messages from Charlie and then from the Paris squad group chat.  His friends were such rebels and had obviously been sending the messages in between classes. He read the one from Charlie first.  

Charlie: Aw that’s sucks!!! I had an ear infection when I was little and that was bad enough never mind both ears🤒 poor little sick Nick. What I going to do with you, eh?   Hopefully the antibiotics make you feel better and if they don’t my cuddles later will😘. I imagine you’ll probably get bombarded with messages from the group chat as I may have let slip to Tao that you’re out sick….sorry baby, please forgive me?❤️ xxx 

Nick couldn’t help but chuckle as he read Charlie’s message. He was right though, Nick had lots of notifications from the group chat. He smiled at his auntie who handed him a warm compress in which he held against his right ear as it was definitely the worst out of the two, before he began to read through the messages.  

Tao: we have a golden retriever Down…

Elle: What are you on about Tao? 

Issac: Nick’s out of school, sick. 

Imogen: I did wonder why I didn’t see him this morning 😭 is he okay? 

Tao: Charlie didn’t say much. CHARLIE?? 

Tara: aw no poor Nick. Hope he’s okay? 

Darcy: yo Nelson, you alive??? 

Tara: DARCY!!! 

Charlie: Hey guys. I’m on my way to double maths, yay!🥺 Nicks got an ear infection….

Nick: actually I have a double ear infection🤒

Darcy: NICK!!! you’re Alive! 

Elle: Aw that’s sounds awful, Nick. Hope you feel better soon x 

Nick: thanks Elle and I’m barely holding on Darcy 😢

Charlie: so dramatic 

Nick: don’t be mean, I’m poorly😩

Tara: Have you gone to the doctor? 

Nick: couldn’t get a GP appointment so had to go to the walk in clinic on bridge street. 

Tao: you’re brave!! That place is awful! 

Nick: tell me about it😳 but yes, seen a doctor and got some antibiotics. Now I have nurse Nellie looking after me *inserts picture* 

Darcy: NELLIE!!! 

Charlie: she’s so cute!! 

Tao: trust you to get a double infection Nelson. Can’t do things the simple way?😅

Nick: Charlie said the exact same thing🙄

Darcy: 😅😅😅😅

Imogen: hopefully the medicine helps. Ear infections are nasty😫

Sahar: sorry just caught up! Aw poor you nick :( feel better soon x 

 Charlie: I better go before my phone gets confiscated 

Tao: same! 

Issac: ditto! 

Darcy: hahaha same! Rest up Nicholas 

Elle: me too! Feel better Nick❤️

Tara: make sure you get some rest Nick and drink plenty fluids 🥰

Nick smiled as he put his phone down. He definitely did have the best friends.  He glanced up as his Auntie re-entered the room carrying the little white pharmacy bag as a scowl crawled on to his face. “What’s THAT?” Nick looked accusingly at the little white packet which was decidedly too small to be a bottle of liquid. Diane winced. This was not going to be easy. “Sorry, Nicky darling. There’s some sort of nation wide shortage of the liquid stuff so they had to give us tablets.” She looked at the death glare Nick was currently sporting. “Come on, it’s not so bad!” “I hate taking tablets,” Nick whined. He knew he sounded like a baby but he’d always hated taking tablets. They made him gag and retch. But his ears were so sore he knew he had to. He sighed dramatically as Diane popped two tablets out of the blister pack and handed them to him along with his tea. “Come on, let’s do it now and they can get to work making you feel better.” Nick steeled himself and popped one tablet into his mouth. He reached for the tea and took a gulp….he swallowed. The tablet was still in his mouth. He spat it back into his hand. “Oh Nick!” Diane chuckled. “Don’t be so dramatic!” Nick grumbled at her. He tried again and swallowed it down but he could feel it going down his throat as he swallowed and he gagged involuntarily. Diane tried to conceal a grin as she watched her giant nephew making such a fuss over a tiny tablet. “Well done,” she said cheerily. “One more to go!” 

Nick groaned and took the next one, which was just as unpleasant as the first. Why couldn’t they have given him the liquid version?  Diane clapped her hands, “Nice work nephew!” Nick just glared at her. His ears hurt even more now. “Now let’s do the ear drops! Then I’ll leave you in peace for a bit.” Nick threw himself dramatically back onto the sofa. That didn’t sound like fun either. He didn’t want anyone touching his sore throbbing ears. Diane took the drops from the packet and started reading the instructions. “Right, I need to warm up the bottle in my hands for a bit first. Then we need to do one ear at a time. You’ll need to lay still for 5 minutes for each ear so the drops can get to work.” She continued scanning the instructions. “I need to clean any gunge or wax off first with cotton wool.”Nick arched an eyebrow at her. Again, that didn’t sound like fun. Seeing his grimace she reassured him, “I’ll be as gentle as I can. Promise.” Nick just huffed in reply and laid himself down on his side. Best get it over with. The next quarter of an hour was unpleasant. He winced every time Diane touched his ears. She whispered apologies as she tried her best to carefully clean and administer the drops. Finally she was done and she left to go to the kitchen to clean up. Nick lay still, he felt really worn out. He decided to close his eyes for a bit.

The next thing he knew he heard the front door opening and his mum calling out. “I’m back!” Diane went to greet her. “How did it go?” Diane looked at her sister for any sign of how the meeting went.“Good I think?” Sarah took off her shoes and coat and put her bag on the end of the bannister. “I’ll find out next week.” She glanced into the lounge where she could see Nick cuddled up on the sofa. His cheeks were flushed and his hair was sticking up in all directions. She was struck by how young he looked. It reminded her of when he would be poorly when he was little. He would make a camp on the sofa and they would cuddle up and watch cartoons all day. “Well, I managed to get him to take his antibiotics! They’d run out of the liquid one like you were worried about. - he wasn’t impressed! We’ve also done his ear drops too so he’s all sorted for a while.” Sarah gaped at her, how on earth had she managed to get Nick to take those giant antibiotics?! “You are an angel!” Sarah pretended to bow down to Diane, “that must’ve been a challenge. He’s a complete baby about taking tablets.” “Oy,” came a grumble from the other room, “I can hear you, you know.” Sarah and Diane chuckled. Sarah made her way into the lounge and sat on the sofa next to Nick. She brushed her hand across his forehead, feeling the heat radiating off him."Sorry baby, I’m only teasing. How are you feeling?” She searched his face for any signs of pain. Nick sighed and pulled himself up into a sitting position. 

“My ears really hurt mum.” He teared up slightly as he looked at her. He’d been grateful to Auntie Diane for coming and being so kind to him but when he felt rubbish he always just wanted his mum. She always made things better. “ I have a headache too and I’m all achey.”“Oh sweetheart,” Sarah cooed as she gave him a hug, “let me go and sort you out with more pain killers and a warm compress. I’ll just say bye to your Auntie.”Diane was busy gathering her things and putting her shoes on. She gave Nick a gently hug, “Feel better soon Nick,” “Thanks for coming to look after me,” he said. She ruffled his hair and headed for the door. Nick glanced at his phone. It was already 2pm he had been asleep for a while. No messages from school, he wondered what Charlie was up to at the moment. He was very much looking forward to some Charlie cuddles. He knew he was a clingy koala when he was poorly. Thankfully Charlie didn’t seem to mind. 

Sarah came into the room with a fresh cup of tea, more toast much to his annoyance, and the liquid paracetamol. “Time for another dose baby, eat your toast then you can have it.” Nick took a tentative bite. He was actually hungrier than he thought and he polished it off fairly quickly. Sarah beamed at him as she poured the medicine onto the spoon. “Open up!” She pretended the spoon was a plane, something she used to do when he was little. Nick laughed, then winced as it made his ears hurt. “Mum!” He protested, but he smiled as he took the medicine.  “Right, let’s get comfy on the sofa and watch some TV for a bit.” Nick grinned and made room for his mum under his blanket. He cuddled up next to her as she scrolled through Netflix looking for something for them to watch before choosing Young Sheldon. They’d watched them all before but it was easy viewing and if he nodded off it wouldn’t matter. She put her arm around him, “sorry I wasn’t here this morning baby,” she smoothed his hair down as she spoke. "It’s ok, Auntie Diane looked after me. I’m glad you’re back though,” he admitted. Sarah smiled softly at him. He was such a sensitive little soul. They settled down to watch the TV, Nick closed his eyes to doze as he listened. The paracetamol was starting to kick in and the pain in his ears was manageable for the moment.

Sarah glanced down at her sleeping son a while later. She was glad he seemed to be managing to sleep comfortably, although every now and then he would touch his hand to his sore ears or let out a little moan of discomfort.  Her poor baby. Nick didn’t tend to get sick very open, but when he did fall poorly, boy did it hit him hard which explains the double ear infection.  She gently touched her knuckles to his forehead, to check his temperature.  He was still rather warm to the touch, but didn’t feel just as feverish as before, she had calpol six plus to thank for that.  She gently moved off the couch, being so careful that she didn’t wake Nick up. Once she was satisfied that he was still sleeping soundly. She draped the blanket over him and headed in to the kitchen to make a start on some soup. Nick always loved her home made soup, especially when he wasn’t feeling very well. She chopped up some vegetables and added them to a pot of water and some stock cubes and gently brought it to the boil and then let it simmer away before going to put some washing on.    

Nick woke up around 4:30pm. The first thing he was aware of as soon as his eyes opened was the sharp pain in both of his ears. He wished they would just stop hurting. He pulled himself in to a sitting position. Luckily his headache had gone away but he still felt dizzy and a little congested.  The doctor did explain that he may experience some flu like symptoms which was completely normal and usually linked with ear infections.  Nellie hopped on to the couch as she noticed Nick awake and nestled in to his side. Nick smiled softly. It was as if she could tell that he was feeling ill.   “You’re awake, darling…” Sarah announced as she entered the living room carrying two mugs of tea.   “How are you feeling?” She asked as she perched beside him.    “Horrible.” Nick grumbled as he buried his face in Nellie’s fur.    “Hopefully the antibiotics start working soon.”  Sarah sighed.  “You’ll probably be due some more in another while.” she said as she glanced at the clock. Diane had said that she had given them to Nick around lunchtime. He was to take 2 tablets, 3 times a day. If she gave him them around dinner time that meant he could have the last dose just before be.   Nick groaned loudly.   Sarah couldn’t help but chuckle at that. Her Nicky, always the dramatic.  “You need to take your medicine if you want your ears to stop hurting, sweetheart.”   Nick just stubbornly shook his head and Sarah sighed. How on earth had Diane managed to persuade Nick to take the tablets earlier? She must be a miracle worker.  Sarah knew she was going to have a fight on her hands later. She had to come up with some way to get Nick to take his antibiotics because if he continued to refuse she would be left with no other choice than to take him to urgent care and she knew he didn’t want that.  “Drink your tea baby, I’ve got some soup on.” she told him.  Nick gave her a little smile.  Sarah always made the best soup when he was sick.   He picked up his mug of tea and took a little sip. He then glanced at his mum.  “How did your meeting go?”  He asked, softly. He hoped that he hadn’t messed things up for her. He would feel so guilty. Sarah worked so hard and she deserved this promotion.    

“It went really well, darling..” she smiled at him.  “I think my boss was very impressed, I’ll find out hopefully by next weeks, once all the candidates have been interviewed.” She explained. Nick smiled at his mum. “They’d be silly not to pick you, you work so hard.”   Sarah smiled at her youngest. “Thank you, baby.”   She then picked up the thermometer from the side, much to Nick distaste as he grimaced and groaned.  Sarah rolled her eyes as she pressed the little button.  “Open.” She instructed.  Nick scoffed childishly as he folded his arms over his chest letting out a stubborn huff. Sarah raised an eyebrow at his childlike behaviour.   “Nicholas Nelson, don’t you make me stick this thermometer some place else.” She said in a stern but bemused tone.  Nick glanced at her. He could be stubborn but he knew he was no match for his mother. He sighed and reluctantly opened his mouth wide enough to let Sarah take his temperature. “Wise choice.” Sarah commented as she slipped the device under his tongue.    39.2° C. It was considerably higher than this morning but not high enough to warrant a trip to urgent care.  The paracetamol had only kept it down for only a few hours.  “My poor little prince…” Sarah cooed as she touched her hand to his forehead and then brushed back his damp fringe.  Nick rubbed his right ear.  He felt his eyes begin to well up. He was normally just a sensitive guy, but being poorly always made him extra clingy and emotional.   “I really don’t feel well, mum.” He cried. Sarah hated seeing her child in pain as she rubbed circles on his back, trying to comfort him. “I’ll get  another warm compress for your sore ears.” She told him.  “Did that help before?”  Nick nodded gently, wincing as if only aggravated the pain. “I’ll be right back, sweet-pea.” She said as she tucked Nick in warmly with the blanket, like she used to do when he was much younger. It didn’t matter how old he got, he would always be her little boy.   

Sarah returned a few minutes later with two warm compresses. She tucked one under Nicks left ear and held the other against his right.  Hopefully that would soothe the throbbing pain for a little while. Sarah glanced at her watch.  It would be another couple of hours before Nick could take anymore paracetamol and the soup wasn’t quite ready. She stroked his feverish cheek with her free hand. She hated seeing either of her boys poorly, as a mother. She wished she could do anything to make him feel better.  “Why don’t you try and sleep, darling?” She suggested.  Sleep was the best medicine.  Nick sighed. He didn’t want sleep. He wanted Charlie. He wanted warm cuddles from his boyfriend to make him feel better but he felt his eyelids growing heavier as his body begged for him to give in to the sleep that was desperately trying to claim his body, a little teeny tiny nap wouldn’t hurt anyone? He allowed his eyes to drop shut as he fell in to a deep slumber. Sarah ensured he was warm enough and continued to hold the compress against his ears until she was fully satisfied he was sleeping. She was just about to pop in to the kitchen to check on her soup when the doorbell rang. Nellie leaped up off the sofa where she had been curled up into a sleeping ball next to Nick and eagerly ran to the door, excitedly jumping up on the glass panels when she could see Charlie on the outside.  Sarah quickly rushed to the door to quieten Nellie before Nick was woken up. She opened the door and beamed brightly at Charlie.  “Hello darling..” she sung cheerily as she pulled him in to a hug.   “Hi Sarah.” Charlie smiled back politely, returning the smile. He quickly noticed the absence of his boyfriend, which left his with a nervous feeling in his belly. Just how poorly was Nick?   “How’s Nick?” He asked hesitantly. Sarah let out a heavy sigh.  “He’s not well at all, poor thing.” She told him.  “He’s napping in the living room.” She nodded towards the closed living room door.  “I’ll pre-warn you Charlie…Nicky can be a bit of baby when he’s feeling ill….very weepy, very clingy.” She said with a bemused smile.  “Just as long as you know what you’re getting yourself in to.” 

 Charlie chuckled quietly. “I can’t wait to experience an even clingier Nick than normal!” He smiled at Sarah then tiptoed quietly into the lounge. He didn’t want to wake Nick up if he was napping. He took in Nicks appearance, his flushed cheeks, the warm compress balanced on his ear as he slept. His face looked pained and he was obviously a bit congested as his mouth was open and he was snoring softly. Charlie couldn’t resist gently stroking his hair, he looked so cuddly like that.  Nick stirred and cracked open one eye. “Char?” He whispered, “are you really here? I’m not still asleep?” Charlie smiled softly at him and leaned down to kiss his forehead.  “I’m here, how are you feeling?” He squeezed onto the sofa in a little spot by Nicks legs. Nick immediately tried to sit up to make more room and the warm compresses  slid off his ears. Charlie quickly picked them up and gently placed them back over his ears. “Lay back babe,” he helped Nick get comfy. Nick squashed himself against the back of the sofa so there was room for Charlie in front of him. “I need Charlie cuddles,” he made grabby hands at Charlie, who snorted but laid down, the little spoon to Nicks big spoon. He turned so he was facing Nick. “Answer the question  - how are you feeling?” Nick sighed. “My ears hurt so much,” he admitted. “The tablets I have to take are massive. My head hurts, my nose is blocked. I’m dizzy too.” As he reeled off his list of symptoms Charlie stroked his arm sympathetically. “That sounds horrible, can I get you anything to help? Cup of tea? I popped to the shop on my way here and got your favourite chocolate bar if you are hungry?”

Nicks eyes filled with tears, “You got me my Oreo bar? That’s so..” he let out a sob. Sarah really hadn’t been kidding thought Charlie, he really was a weepy one when he was poorly. “Don’t cry!” Charlie gently wiped the tears from his cheeks. Nick took a shuddery breath and buried his face in Charlie’s shoulder. Charlie stoked his back while he calmed himself down.  Sarah popped her head in and took in the sight in front of her. “Oh Nick!” She looked at him fondly. “You really don’t feel well do you darling.” Nick looked up at her through teary eyes. “Sorry, it’s just Charlie brought me my favourite chocolate bar and I love him so much and I feel so poorly….” He managed to stifle his sobs.  Sarah tried very hard to contain her laughter and she mouthed to Charlie “I told you!” Charlie grinned back. He’d enjoy teasing Nick about this once he was better.  “Tell you what,” Sarah said, “ why don’t you have a bit of that chocolate and then you can take your medicine.” Nick nodded slowly. He really needed to pull himself together but seeing Charlie had just set him off and now he was just a weepy mess.  Charlie reached into his bag and pulled out the bar. “Here, you have a bit. I’ll get you a drink and warm these compresses up for you.” “Don’t be long though,” Nick whined, “I need you.” Charlie gave him a quick kiss and followed Sarah through to the kitchen. She was already making more tea, so Charlie popped the compresses in the microwave to warm up. “Bless him, he really doesn’t feel well does he?” Charlie sighed. Sarah gave him a small smile. “No, he doesn’t. But the antibiotics will hopefully kick in in the next couple of days and then he’ll be back to his slightly less clingy self.” Charlie took the compresses and two mugs of tea into the lounge, balancing the tablet packet tucked under his chin. 

Nick was chewing on a piece of chocolate, his face lit up when he saw Charlie return “I missed you,” he held out his arms for a hug. Charlie deposited everything on the coffee table and returned the hug gently. “You big soft rugby idiot,” he chuckled. “I was gone about 2 minutes!” He was hit with a huff in response.  “That’s 2 minutes too long,” Nick grumbled. Charlie helped Nick to get comfy, then passed him his tea and two of the tablets. Nick eyed them warily. "Come on babe,” Charlie batted his eyelashes at him which made Nick laugh. "If you take your medicine like a good boy we can snuggle on the sofa for the rest of the afternoon.” “Promise?” Charlie nodded. Nick popped the pill in his mouth and swallowed it down only gagging slightly on the second one.” Sarah who had been quietly watching from the doorway exclaimed, “ I don’t believe it! Nicholas Nelson, you made such a fuss about those tablets in the past! What magic did Charlie weave?” Nick looked at her sheepishly. “He promised me snuggles,” he admitted. Sarah’s heart felt like it could burst. They really were the perfect pair. She smiled affectionately at Charlie. “Well Charlie you are now responsible for all Nick’s tablet taking in the future!”Charlie grinned widely at her, “Deal!” Sarah went back to the kitchen, leaving the boys in peace. Nick cleared his throat dramatically. “I believe you owe me snuggles.” He held out his arms and Charlie settled back in. “Oh no, what a hardship, “ he joked. “However will I survive cuddling my gorgeous boyfriend all afternoon.” They both giggled.

Nick lay with his head on Charlie’s chest, a warm compress pressed firmly to his right ear. Charlie ran his fingers through Nick’s hair as they both watched a rerun of the great British bake off.  Nick had his eyes closed but he wasn’t sleeping, just resting and enjoying having his hair played with. Charlie glanced down at his boyfriend’s fever flushed cheeks and moved the back of his hand so that it was resting against Nick’s forehead. He hissed at the heat he felt radiating off him.  “Jesus! You’re burning up, Nick.” He exclaimed.  “You could fry an egg on your forehead.”   “M-hm.” Nick hummed in reply, that would explain why he was feeling so rotten.  “Have you taken anything for that temperature?” Charlie asked as he placed a kiss on Nick’s warm skin.   “Mum gave me calpol a few hours ago.” Nick mumbled sleepily. Charlie tried his best to stifle a snort as he ran his hand through Nick’s hair again.   “I think you might need another dose.” Charlie announced. Nick let out a little groan.  “Noo…don’t leave me.” He pouted.  Charlie chuckled. “I will be right back, I promise..” he said as he tried to wiggle himself away from Nick the cuddle koala rugby king.  Nick gripped on to Charlie’s hand.  “Pinky promise?” He asked. Charlie smirked. Sarah was right. Nick was a giant baby when he was sick, but he was enjoying the extra clinginess. “Pinky promise.” Charlie confirmed as he wrapped his pink around his boyfriends before placing another kiss on his forehead.  Nick snuggled further under the blanket as Charlie peeled himself away and headed in to the kitchen.  

Sarah was ladling some soup into bowls as Charlie entered the kitchen. She smiled warmly at him.   “Soups ready.” She announced cheerily as she emptied the leftover soup in to plastic container.  Charlie smiled.  “It smells delicious..” He wasn’t fibbing. He had tasted Sarah’s homemade soup before and it was to die for.  “How’s the patient doing?” Sarah asked as she cup up some bread in to little squares and popped them on a side plate. Nick loved to dip bread in to his soup. He’d done it ever since he was a small child.   “I think his fevers spiked. He’s really hot…” He explained and then realised what he had just said and nearly choked as Sarah shot him an amused look like a raised eyebrow. “I…I mean, like temperature wise.”  Charlie corrected himself as his cheeks flushed red.   Sarah just laughed as she petted his cheek. “I know what you meant, darling.” She assured him.  Sarah placed the bowls of soup for Charlie and Nick, the bread, a glass of water and the bottle of liquid paracetamol on the tray and followed Charlie back in to the lounge.  Charlie reclaimed his position next to Nick who had pulled himself in to a semi sitting position, his blanket wrapped around his shoulders.  Sarah took in her son’s dishevelled appearance. His face was pale, apart from his rosy flushed cheeks, he had dark bags under his eyes. His hair was sticking up in all different directions and he just looked plain miserable. She knelt down next to the couch, lifting her hand against his forehead, wincing at the heat she felt as she dragged the back of her knuckles down his cheek and neck.  “Oh Nicky, you’re awfully warm, sweetheart.”  She glanced at the clock. It had been four hours since Nick had last had any paracetamol. At least she knew he’d take this without a fuss as it tasted like strawberries and was designed for infants.  She knew that once she’d managed to get his temperature under control that hopefully he’d start to feel a little better. “Can you try eating a few spoonfuls of soup for me, first?” She asked him.  Nick glanced at Sarah. He barely had an appetite, although he had enjoyed the few squares of chocolate he’d eaten earlier, but he knew Sarah had went to the effort of making a pot of soup and it did smell tasty. He nodded. “Ok.” He said hoarsely as Charlie helped him into a fully sitting position before Sarah placed the bowl in his lap and then handed him some bread. Charlie watched him with intent as he broke tiny pieces of the bread off, rolling each one in to a ball and dunking them in to the soup.   “You’re such a child.” Charlie giggled.   “Hey!” Nick replied, feigning offence as he lifted a spoonful of soup to his lips.  It tasted the exact same as it always did. Delicious.  Much to Sarah’s delight. Nick polished off his entire bowl of soup.  Charlie too.  “Clean bowls all round.” She smiled as she popped them on to the tray before picking up the bottle of Calpol, shaking it and measuring out a dose.  

Once Nick had taken his medicine and was settled. Charlie put a movie on for them and allowed Nick to snuggle back in to his side.  He was even more cuddlier than usual like this and Charlie was enjoying every minute of it. That’s exactly how they spent the remainder of the evening until Charlie’s curfew.  Nick had perked up a little bit, thanks to the medicine and his fever was down much to Sarah and Charlie’s relief.      It took another 4 days for Nick’s ear infections to completely clear up but thanks to the antibiotics, Charlie and Sarah weighing on him hand and foot and the perfect amount of Nellie cuddles.  Nick survived….just.  

Chapter Text

Charlie was absolutely freezing. He blew into his hands and jogged up and down on the spot in a futile attempt to warm himself up. He was the reserve for the rematch against St John’s. He was extremely pleased that he hadn’t been called upon to play yet as he still had vivid memories of their last game in the pouring rain when he had ended up with a bloody nose. Though he wouldn’t mind the chance to warm up a bit on the pitch. He turned to look behind him at the crowd. The cold weather had kept most people at home but he could clearly make out his friends all bundled together wrapped up in coats, hats and scarves. Sarah was with them too. They had insisted she stand with them when they noticed she was stood by herself and Charlie watched fondly as they all laughed and included her in their conversation. He turned his attention back to the field, his eyes scanning for Nick as they always did. He turned just in time to see Nick attempt to tackle one of the St John’s players. He launched himself at the other boys legs and managed to bring him down, preventing him from getting a try. The Paris squad screamed in support. Truham were losing the game, but it wasn’t quite the thrashing of last time. A lot of this was down to Nick, who was a lot bigger and stronger than he had been last time they played. Charlie loved watching Nick play. He was in his element, giving orders to the team, throwing himself enthusiastically into every tackle. The fact he looked good in his uniform was an added bonus.

The whistle went for half time and the Truham boys all made their way back to where Charlie and coach Singh were stood. She clapped them on the back as they approached and grabbed their water bottles. “Nice work boys!” She bellowed enthusiastically, “you are giving them a run for their money.”

“Still losing though,” grumbled Harry. “I don’t know why we bother play them every year. We are never gonna beat them”

Coach Singh glared at him, “ if you think that, then you can go and get changed. We don’t need that kind of negativity on the team.” Nick glanced and Charlie and grinned. They loved that Coach was able to put Harry in his place. “Sorry Miss,” Harry grumbled sheepishly. She glared at him, “Fine, but lose the negative attitude.” She outlined some tactics for the second half and soon the boys were back on the pitch ready to go again.

The second half was well underway when suddenly the crowd started to cheer loudly. Shouts of “Go on Nick!”  And “Nelsooon!” got louder. Nick had the ball and was sprinting away from the opposing players towards the score line. Charlie held his breath as he watched Nick get closer and closer. Two St John’s boys were chasing him but it looked like they weren’t going to catch him. All of a sudden Nick lost his footing slightly, he managed to keep going but he lost his momentum and began to fall and that was enough for the St John’s boys to catch him. They both launched themselves at him just as he was sliding towards the line. To Charlie it looked like it happened in slow motion. one boy tackled him from behind, the other from the side. The force sent Nick crashing to the ground, his right leg bent at a strange angle. Charlie watched in horror as the force of the tackle sent Nick crashing head first into the goal post. The cracking sound of his head could be heard across the pitch. He heard a scream of horror  coming from the crowd. Nick landed in a heap on the ground with the two players on top of him. Immediately the ref blew the whistle and the two boys climbed off. Their faces paled as the took in the sight of Nick underneath them. He wasn’t moving, his eyes were closed. Blood was seeping from a gash in his head. His leg was bent at a strange angle underneath him. Christian caught up with him and instantly screamed, “Coach Singh!” Charlie’s heart stopped. It felt like a bucket of ice water had been poured over him. He watched as Coach Singh raced across to where Nick was laying. It took a few seconds for his brain to catch up with him before he was sprinting across the pitch to join them.

“Nick, can you hear me?” Coach Singh spoke loudly into Nicks ear. No response. “Ok, we need an ambulance.” She gestured to the St John’s coach who had been refereeing and he ran off the pitch to call for help. Charlie knelt down next to Nick and went to grab his hand. “Don’t move him Charlie,” Coach was firm. “It’s important we don’t move him until the paramedics get here.” Charlie’s eyes filled with tears. He carefully stroked Nick’s hair. “I’m here,” he whispered, “please wake up.” Nick remained motionless.

A crowd of players had gathered around them, all looking concerned at the sight of Nick unconscious on the ground. Suddenly the crowd was dispersed by the sounds of Sarah Nelson who was desperately trying to get to the centre of the commotion. She finally pushed her way through and gasped as she saw her beautiful boy laying on the ground. “Nicky?” She was instantly on her knees next to him. “Baby?” Her voice went up an octave. “Open your eyes Nick.” Sarah’s voice trembled. She was clearly trying to hold it together. Coach Singh took charge of the situation. “Right. The match is over. Boys back to the changing rooms NOW.” The crowd of rugby players slowly retreated back to the changing rooms. Christian, Otis and Sai hung back, clearly not wanting to leave before they knew Nick was ok. Tao and Isaac hurried up to them.

“What happened?” Tao asked, his face full of concern. “Is he ok ?”

The rugby lads looked shaken up. “He’s unconscious.” Sai replied,  “he hit his head really hard.”

“Oh god,” Isaac muttered. They looked over to where Nick still lay on the ground. “What should we do?” They decided to wait by the sidelines for news. They couldn’t just go home not knowing what was happening.

Sirens sounded from outside the school, getting louder. An ambulance came speeding into the school car park. Two paramedics got out and quickly jogged over to the small huddle on the pitch.

“What’s happened”

“A bad tackle, Nick here hit his head hard on the post on the way down. He has been unconscious since it happened, about 10 minutes now. We haven’t moved him.”

Charlie was listening to the words but he couldn’t process them. Why wasn’t Nick waking up yet? Sarah and Charlie moved out of the way so the paramedics could assess Nick. “Nick!” They said loudly. A faint groan emerged.

“Can you hear me?”

Nick felt like he was underwater. He could hear a voice calling his name but it was all blurry and confused. His head was pounding. And his leg. It felt like it was on fire. What had happened? He slowly opened his eyes, his vision was wobbly. The pain in his leg intensified and he let out a loud moan. “I think he’s back with us,” the paramedic smiled at Sarah. “Nick you’ve had a bad rugby tackle. Can you tell me where it hurts?”

Nick couldn’t get any words out, all he could focus on was the pain in his leg and the pounding in his head. “Argh..” he tried to reach down to grab his leg but the paramedic held him still.

“Easy there, try not to move.” He looked at Sarah, “Mum is it?” Sarah gave a small nod. “I think to be on the safe side we’ll put him on a spinal board. I want to be sure there are no spine injuries. His leg is definitely broken, we will splint that and get him to hospital. “ Charlie looked down, he hadn’t even looked at Nicks leg. He had been so focused on the fact he wasn’t waking up. But looking at it now it was clearly broken. A shard of bone had pierced the skin between his kneecap and ankle. Blood was oozing from the site and dripping onto the grass underneath him. Charlie felt sick. It looked so painful.

The next 5 minutes were a complete blur to Charlie as he watched as the paramedics carefully loaded Nick on to the stretcher. He was secured on to a spinal board, a leg brace was fitted around his injured leg. It had been horrific for Nick as the paramedics moved his leg and he had let out a painful cry. The paramedics inserted a cannula into Nick’s hand before starting to administer morphine to try and stabilise the pain before Nick was moved into the back of the ambulance.  Charlie hung back. He wanted desperately, more than anything to jump in to the back of the ambulance and hold on to Nick’s hand but he knew Nick would probably want his mum.  

Charlie watched as Sarah climbed out of the back of the ambulance and approached him.  “Charlie, darling.” She said as she she put her hand on his shoulder.  “Nicky’s asking for you.” She told him.   “He’s a little upset and distressed.” She explained.  “Why don’t you travel in the ambulance with him and I’ll follow in the car.”   Charlie just glanced at Sarah. Surely Nick would want his mum when he was in pain like that.   “He’s pretty adamant that you go with him.” Sarah replied, she wouldn’t admit it. She wanted nothing more than to stay put and hold her son’s hand but Nick had made it very clear that he wanted Charlie. He wanted both of them but there was only space for one.   “Are you sure?”  Charlie asked in a quiet voice.  He felt like he was over stepping the mark.  “You should be with him.” He pushed.  Sarah put her hand his upper arm, giving it a gentle pat.  “It’s you that he wants, darling.” She said softly.

Charlie gave Sarah a small nod and took a deep breath. He climbed into the back of the ambulance. He could hear Nick’s sobs and they broke his heart. Nick was strapped onto the bed, his head secured with foam blocks so he was unable to move at all. He could only look up to the ceiling. He was obviously in a lot of pain, his sobs interspersed with moans.

“I’m here Nick,” Charlie tried to soothe him as he was directed to sit at a seat by Nicks feet. They needed him out of the way so they could look after him on the short journey to hospital.

“Char?” Nicks voice was strained and he spoke with gritted teeth, “ I can’t see you.” Charlie rubbed Nicks good leg gently. “Can you feel that? I’m right here. Just lie still baby.” Nick let out a sob, Charlie could see he was still frantically trying to see him so he quickly glanced at the paramedic for approval before getting out of his seat and leaning over the bed so that Nick could see him. “I’m here babe,” he made eye contact with Nick and saw his face instantly relax a fraction. There were tear tracks down his face and he gently wiped them away. “Breathe with me, nice and slowly…” Charlie attempted to calm him down, holding his hand tight.

“It….hurts…” Nick managed to speak through the pain.

“I know it does, the paramedics are going to get you to hospital and they will sort you out. I have to sit back down now but I’ll keep talking to you ok? I promise I’m not going anywhere.”  Charlie reluctantly sat back down in his seat and put his seatbelt on. The paramedic took his place at Nick’s head and gave the signal to his colleague to drive. It wasn’t far to the hospital but it was rush hour and it seemed to be taking forever. Nick had started to shiver. He had never felt pain like this before. He was trying so hard not to panic but he just wanted this to all be a nightmare he could wake up from. He was so cold. And his head felt so fuzzy. He could feel Charlie stroking his leg and trying to reassure him that it wouldn’t be much longer.

“Why is he shivering so much?” Charlie asked the paramedic, whose name he had learnt, was Tom. “It’s not cold in here?”

“I think he’s going into shock.” Tom grabbed a blanket from overhead and covered him up gently. “It’s not surprising given the nature of the injury.” He lent through to the front of the ambulance. “I think we need to get a move on.”

His colleague switched on the lights and sirens and the ambulance picked up speed as cars moved out of the way. Charlie was trying not to panic. What did it mean to go in shock? Was it life threatening? Would he pass out again?

Tom could sense his spiral. “Just keep talking to him, try and keep him as calm as you can. You are doing brilliantly.” Charlie gave him a small smile. He didn’t feel like he was doing well at all but he appreciated him saying so. “ he’s lucky to have you.”

Eventually the ambulance came to a stop outside accident and emergency. The doors were flung open and Nick was wheeled quickly out and into the building. Charlie tried to follow, he could hear Nick calling for him in a panic but he was stopped by a kind but firm looking nurse at the doorway. “Sorry love. You can’t go through there. It’s immediate family only.”

“But he needs someone with him?” Charlie was horrified to think of Nick going through this alone. The tears that had been threatening to fall for the whole journey finally spilled over. “He’s in good hands I promise.” Charlie was ready to protest more but was distracted by the sound of Sarah racing towards him. She had probably broken a few laws following the ambulance as it parted the traffic but she didn’t care. Anyone would have done the same if it was their baby in the ambulance. “I’m his mum, can I go through and see him?” The nurse smiled at her. “Of course. Can I just get some details first?” She led Sarah over to the desk to fill in Nicks personal details. Charlie slumped in a chair in the waiting room and put his head in his hands.

Nick had been whisked into resus. A team of doctors and nurses carefully transported him from the trolley to the bed. A blood pressure cuff was secured to his arm. His rugby shirt was cut open to allow sensors to be placed on his chest. He felt exposed and scared. The pain was excruciating and he couldn’t see what was going on. There were hands everywhere. He began to cry again. A kind face appeared above him. “Nick is it? Try to relax, we are going to help you.” The doctor carried out some checks, asking him if he could feel it  when he tapped his legs and arms. “I don’t think there’s any spinal damage,” he declared. “But I want to send him for an X-ray to check what we are dealing with before we remove the neck brace.” A nurse injected something into his IV line and he felt himself relax into the pillow. “Just a little something to calm you down love,” he said kindly.

Sarah burst through the doors of the little side room in resus, desperate to see her son.  “I’m here, sweetheart.” She soothed as she stood where Nick could see her but back a little so she wasn’t interfering with the doctors and nurses.  The doctor turned to introduce himself to Sarah before informing her what was happening.  “Nick will definitely need stitches to that gash on his head…” he explained.  “First, I want to send him for full body scan…I just want to make sure we haven’t missed anything, just with the force of the tackle and with any head injury, we just like to rule everything out…” He explained as he then turned his attention to Nick, who was staring up at the ceiling, clearly feeling the effects of the pain drugs.   “Hopefully that morphine will have kicked in by now, young man..”  he said.  “We’re just going to take you to have a CT scan and then we will get some Xray pictures of that leg.”   Nick glanced between the doctor and Sarah. He felt weird. He felt kind of floaty. He could see and hear what was happening around him, but he felt disconnected from it all. His leg hurt, not as much as before. Not since they had injected the magic clear liquid into his hand, but it still hurt.  His head ached and he felt a little sick.  

Nick was taken for a CT scan which much to the doctors and Sarah’s relief, cleared him of any spinal injury or additional fractures. He was removed from the head and spinal brace although his injured leg remained in a brace until the doctor had seen the X-ray. He would probably be pretty bruised around his chest and ribs area with how hard he fell as well and the other players tumbling on top of him with great force. Poor Nick.  Sarah sat next to Nick, holding his hand and talking soothing words of comfort to him as the nurse stitched up the gash in his forehead where he had walloped it off of the goal post when he had fallen. The result of the impact had also left him with a black eye and a concussion as he had thrown up almost instantly as soon as he had been able to move again, all over himself and the floor. He had apologised, feeling embarrassed. The nurse had brushed him off, explaining how she had dealt with worse. She had provided Nick with a sick bowl and a clean hospital gown. Now Nick was lay flat on his back as the Nurse stitched his head. He had his eyes squeezed tightly, he hated needles. He wasn’t the biggest fan of hospitals in general either  to be honest, so this whole ordeal was Nick’s idea of his worst nightmare.  Sarah watched as the nurse administered the stitches to the area on Nick’s forehead that she had numbed up.  Nine stitches. NINE!! in total, was what he required. Sarah squeezed his hand and soothed him with each stitch.   “You’re doing amazing, my darling..” she praised him as she brought his hand up to her lips, placing a kiss on it and giving it another squeeze.  “I’m so proud of you, baby.”  She knew this was stressful for Nick. He’d freak out any time the GP tried to give him a simple vaccination never mind lay completely still for 15 minutes as the nurse administered stitch after stitch.   “Okay Nicholas, all done.” The nurse announced as she used surgical scissors to cut her thread and then covered the area with strips of medical tape.  She stood up and removed her gloves.  “Hopefully the doctor will be around soon with the Xray results.” She told them as she discarded her gloves in the waste bin.  She glanced at Nick as she placed a hand on his shoulder. He seemed like such a sweet, pleasant boy. She could tell just by looking at the mangled mess of his leg and the wound that she had just stitched that it must’ve been some tackle.    “Do you want to say hello to your friend.” She asked. There would be no harm in Charlie popping in as he’d been waiting out in the waiting room, alone this whole time.   “Boyfriend..” Nick quickly corrected her.  “Charlie’s my boyfriend.” 

“I’m sorry..” the nurse gave him a sheepish smile. She felt bad for just assuming.  “I’ll go fetch him. I’m sure he’s desperate to see you.” She said before she headed off in the direction of the waiting room where she found Charlie nursing a cup of vending machine tea, a worried expression painted on his face as he stared off in to space.  

Nick turned to glance at Sarah after the nurse left.  “Mum I feel sick…” he mumbled. His head felt sore and heavy and he felt dizzy.  The doctor had explained that he had suffered a serious concussion and would probably feel like this for a few days.  The pain was horrible. He just wanted to close his eyes and sleep but the pain was too intense and he wanted to see Charlie, anyway.  Sarah placed the little sick bowl that the nurse had provided in front of Nick just in case he needed to use it.   Nick was suddenly distracted from his nausea as a finally head of black curls popped around the door.  “Hi.”

Charlie took in the sight in front of him. Nick was flat on his back, his leg still in the brace. He looked so small in the bed. His face was pale and clammy and bruised. he was glad to see the cut had been stitched up and was extremely relieved to see that he had been taken out of the head brace. He immediately went to Nicks side and took his hand. “How are you feeling?”

Nick took a breath, he felt so sick and exhausted and it felt like he was at sea, everything seemed to be moving. But Charlie and his mum were here and he felt safe. “My head hurts a lot, so does my leg too. I feel like I was run over by a bus.”

Charlie gave him a soft smile, “ well you were piled on by two enormous St John’s players so I’m not surprised.”

Sarah watched the two of them fondly. Charlie turned to her, “have the doctors said anything?” Sarah nodded and tried to gather her thoughts, it had been such a scary time. “They are happy that he hasn’t broken any other bones other than his leg obviously. He has a nasty concussion and will be bruised and sore for a while.” She smiled down at Nick who had closed his eyes again trying to fight off the nausea. “ we are just waiting on the doctor to examine his leg X-ray to find out what happens now.” Charlie gently squeezed Nick’s hand. Concussion wasn’t surprising at all, he’d seen first hand how hard he had hit that post. But it was still a scary thought. Any brain injury was scary. “I love you,” he whispered to him, “you are being so brave.”

Nick smiled with his eyes still closed, “I don’t feel very brave,” he admitted, “I’m so scared Charlie.” Charlie fought back tears as he stroked his face. “That’s only natural babe, I promise it’ll all be over soon.”

The nurse came back in to check on Nick. She adjusted Nick’s bed so his head was slightly raised to make it easier for him to see and talk. However as soon as he moved the nausea overtook him and he instantly threw up into the sick bowl on his lap. “Oh god,” he protested weakly, “I’m sorry, that’s so gross.” Charlie gently brushed his fringe out of his eyes, “ Don’t be silly, you can’t help it.” The nurse cheerily whisked the bowl away and replaced it with another one. “Let’s keep you lying flat hmm.” She put his bed back to the original position. Nick sighed and closed his eyes. He really needed the room to stop spinning.

A knock on the door signalled the arrival of the orthopaedic doctor who had been examining Nick’s X-ray.

“Good afternoon, I’m Dr Murray, the orthopaedic surgeon. Is this Nicholas Nelson?” Sarah shook his hand, “yes, this is Nick, I’m his mum Sarah and this is his boyfriend Charlie.” Charlie gave an awkward wave and Nick gave a tight smile through his still closed eyes, he felt so awful.

“Lovely to meet you all. Now I’ve been looking at Nick’s X-rays. That’s quite the break you have there son. I’ve organised a theatre to get ready and we are going to take you down  immediately to get it sorted.”

“What?” Nicks eyes opened wide and he squinted at the bright light. “Surgery?” He could feel himself panicking. Charlie tried to soothe him “it’s ok Nick, it’ll be ok.”

Dr Murray looked kindly at Nick. “You have been through a lot this afternoon and I know with that nasty concussion you are probably feeling sick too and finding it hard to concentrate?” Nick nodded. “ your leg break is a lot more complicated than we first thought. We need to get in there and put the pieces of bone back together. An open fracture like this could easily become infected. The quicker we operate, the better the outcome.”

Nick felt like he was hyperventilating. He’d never had a surgery before. Never been given anaesthetic before. What if something went wrong? His heart monitor began to beep more quickly as the panic set in. The doctor was explaining the next steps to sarah when he realised Nick was panicking. “Nurse, can we get a dose of Ativan to calm him down please?” The nurse hurried off and Nick looked at his mum, his eyes wild and unfocused. “ Mum, I don’t want surgery,” he whispered, “What if….what if,” tears rolled down his cheeks, “ what if I don’t wake up?”

Sarah’s heart broke but she tried to keep her voice level and calm, “ listen to me Nick. You ARE going to wake up, I promise you will be fine. I’ll be here the whole time waiting ok?” Nick shuddered a breath and nodded. Charlie kissed his cheek and he felt the nurse injecting his IV with a cold liquid. “I love you Nick,” his eyes were full of tears. Nick could feel the effects of the drugs and his heart began to slow back down. He closed his eyes. His mum had promised he’d be ok. He relaxed against his pillow. He tried to listen to the doctors words but he couldn’t follow the conversation. He focused instead on the feeling of Charlie’s hand in his, rubbing gentle circles into his palm.

In no time at all porters arrived to take Nick up for his surgery. Charlie kissed his forehead gently. The sedative had taken effect and Nick was sleeping. Sarah was allowed to go with him until he was put under the anaesthesia. Charlie watched as they wheeled him away. A kind nurse put her arm round him. “ Are you ok love?” He nodded, “ I just need him to be ok.”

“Dr Murray is the best orthopaedic surgeon we have. Your boy is in safe hands.” She smiled reassuringly at Charlie, “ now let’s get you a cup of tea and I’ll take you back to the waiting room.”

Charlie sat down on one of the uncomfortable chairs in the waiting room nursing a cup of lukewarm cup of hospital tea. He grimaced. He didn’t think he could stomach it at all. He just felt so sick and worried. He couldn’t think of anything else other than the fact that his beautiful Nick was laying on an operating table somewhere in the hospital having surgery. He knew Nick had a badly broken leg but surgery hadn’t even crossed his mind.  He just hoped Sarah came back soon. What if something went wrong? Had Nick reacted badly to the general anaesthetic? He hated being left in the dark.  He was suddenly snapped out of his train of thoughts by his phone buzzing. He pulled it out of his (Nick’s) sweatshirt pocket and glanced down to the numerous notifications dotted down his Home Screen, all from their worried friends. Desperate for an update.  

Tao: Charlie? Any update on Nick? 

Elle: How’s Nick doing? Are you Ok Charlie? 

Tara: Is Nick’s leg broken then? 

Issac: the St John’s players feel so bad. They send get well wishes to Nick 

Darcy: That was SO scary! Is Nick okay? 

Sahar: WHAT??? What have I missed?

Imogen: Nick got injured at the game…badly 😭

Sahar: OMG. What happened? Is he okay?? I knew I should have skipped band practice. 

Issac: Nick was tackled by 2 ginormous St John’s players 

Sahar: omg ☹️ is he ok?? 

Tara: he was unconscious for a bit. He hit his head really hard 

Tao: he came around just as the ambulance arrived but I think he’s broken his leg 

Charlie read through the concerned messages from their friends. Now he had to be the one to inform them about the severity of Nick’s broken leg and that he was now undergoing an operation to correct the bone.  He felt sick. He couldn’t believe this had happened. This wasn’t how the day was supposed to be. They had planned that after the game, they would all go back to his house and order pizzas and watch movies. He took a deep sigh before typing out a response to their friends.  

Charlie: Hi guys. Still at hospital. Luckily there’s no spinal or neck damage but Nick’s got a really bad concussion. He’s in a lot of pain and he’s thrown up a few times ☹️ he needed 9 stitches!!!! He’s pretty bruised up as well and he’s broken his leg so badly that he needs surgery to correct the bone as it’s an open fracture and they don’t want to risk infection.  He’s in theatre right now 😓  

Tara: What??? SURGERY??? 

Darcy: omg!! But he will be okay after it though???   9 stitches 😔 Nick would have hated that! 

Imogen: omg poor Nick! 

Tao: Has he been in surgery long?  Are you okay Charlie? 

Elle: Omg! Poor Nick. Is there anything we can do? 

Issac: 😓 hopefully he will be okay after the operation? 

Sahar: 😭😭😭

Tao: do you need any of us there Charlie? Are you alone? Is Sarah with you? 

Charlie watched as the notifications came flooding in with worried responses. He glanced at the time on his phone. Sarah had been gone for over 30 minutes now. Shouldn’t she be back by now?  His anxiety was sky high. He couldn’t believe that Nick needed surgery.  He looked so petrified before.  

Charlie: The doctor is concerned with how badly the break was to Nick’s leg because it’s an open fracture. He did say that the surgery should correct the bone but Nick will be in a cast for a couple of months. Sarah went down to theatre with him about half an hour ago but I haven’t heard anything. I’ll keep you all updated ❤️

He then put his phone in his pocket as the distraction wasn’t helping at all. His foot nervously tapped on the tiled floor of the waiting room.  Nick had to be okay.   What if he couldn’t play rugby ever again? He’d be devastated.  Charlie tried to stop the negative thoughts entering his head. His head snapped up when he heard the door opening and Sarah walked in carrying two paper cups of tea.  She looked tired and her face was red and puffy. She’d obviously been crying.  No wonder. It can’t be a nice experience having to hand your child over to surgeons.   Charlie stood up quickly.  “Is he okay?”     Sarah handed over one of the cups to Charlie before sitting down and exhaling a deep breath she had been holding.  “Nick’s not long gone in to theatre…about 10 minutes.” She explained.  “The sedative they’d given him to calm him down didn’t work properly. He woke up on the way down, worked himself into a bit of a state…” she sighed.  “It took me some persuading to calm him down.”  Charlie felt his heart snap in two. The thought up Nick being upset and crying over the fear of the surgery broke his heart. He must’ve been so scared. He knows how Nick is when it comes to anything medical related.   “Did they say how long the surgery will be??”    Sarah sighed, again.  “The surgeon explained it could take at least a couple of hours. It’s a complicated fracture.” She sighed.  Charlie sat down again, holding on to his fresh cup of tea.  He let out a long sigh. This wait was going to be torturous.  

2 hours turned into 3 and still there hadn’t been any news. Sarah had popped to the canteen and bought them both a sandwich to keep them going. He wasn’t hungry, he picked at the edges of it and tried to swallow it down. What was taking so long? His parents had been surprisingly understanding about him staying at the hospital until there was news but he knew he’d have to go home soon. He sighed loudly, causing Sarah to look up from her phone. “Charlie love? Are you ok?” Charlie looked at her. She looked really stressed, her forehead in a permanent frown but she was eyeing him with worry. “Sorry….” Charlie didn’t want to add to her problems. “I just wish we knew what was going on. I keep picturing him up in surgery and….” His voice broke. Sarah wrapped him up in a tight hug. “I know,” she soothed, “ I’m just the same. But the doctor was confident he’d be able to repair the break, we just have to be patient.” Charlie nodded at her and sagged back into his chair, leaning his head on her shoulder. Sarah was such a cuddly mum, so different from his own mum who showed her love in a more reserved way.

Eventually, nearly 4 hours after going for his surgery, Dr Murray approached them in the waiting room. Still dressed in his scrubs and looking rather tired, he sat down next to Sarah. “How is he?” She immediately asked.

“Nicholas did extremely well,” Sarah and Charlie both let out a sigh of relief. “The surgery was longer and more complicated than we had  thought. We managed to repair the bone and have inserted some hardware to keep it in place while it heals. He’s going to be very sore for a while and definitely no rugby for the rest of the season.”

“But he’s going to be ok? He can play again eventually?” Sarah couldn’t bear to think of how she would break the news to Nick if he wasn’t allowed to ever play again.

“Oh yes, “ Dr Murray smiled, “I’m sure with plenty of physio he’ll be back on the pitch playing again,” Sarah looked at Charlie who was smiling with tears in his eyes. Thank god it had all gone well.

“Can we see him?” Sarah asked. Dr. Murray nodded. “He’s not come round from the anaesthetic yet but you can come into recovery and sit with him. He’ll be admitted to the ward once he’s woken up. With the severity of the break and the concussion he’s suffered he’ll need to stay in for at least 48 hours for monitoring.”

Sarah and Charlie followed the doctor to the recovery room. There were 4 beds in the unit, but only Nicks was occupied currently. He was laying still on the bed. His leg had been put in plaster up to the knee. He had oxygen in his nose and and IV drip in his left hand. He was still asleep. Charlie studied his face. The bruising was really stark against his pale skin. Sarah took hold of his hand, Charlie next to her.

“It’s all over now Nicky,” she soothed. “You were so brave. The doctor is really pleased with you.”

Charlie lent forward and brushed Nick’s hair out of his eyes. “I’m here too Nick, I love you.”

Nick could hear voices talking above him. He took a moment to work out where he was. Why could he hear beeping? Why did it smell like antiseptic? Why did his body feel like lead. It felt like he was strapped to the bed, he felt so heavy. His head was throbbing like a drum. He felt really sick. He gently tried to wiggle his fingers and toes. A sharp pain shot up his right leg and he let out an involuntary groan.

“Nicky?” That sounded like his mum. He forced his eyes open and squinted at the harsh light. He could make out two dark blobs next to him but his eyes just wouldn’t focus. He closed them, took a breath and tried again. This time they were a little clearer and he could make out his mum and Charlie’s worried faces. “Oh baby, you’re awake!” His mum squeezed his hand. Charlie smiled at him with tears in his eyes, “how do you feel?”

Nick spoke slowly and a little slurred, still feeling the effects of the drugs and the concussion. “Sore,” he looked around the room, “what happened? Where am I?”

Charlie glanced at Sarah. Should he be worried that Nick couldn’t remember what happened? Sarah gave him a reassuring smile. The doctor had warned her that he would be confused when he first came round and that he may never remember the actual accident. “You had a rugby accident darling, do you remember?” Nicks eyes widened. He remembered playing against St John’s but the last memory he had was laughing with Charlie at half time. He shook his head. “It was a bad tackle. You hit your head on the goal post which knocked you out.” That would explain the headache, Nick thought. “You also broke your leg pretty badly, you’ve just woken up from surgery to have the bone repaired.” Nick tried to process what his mum had told him. He’d been knocked out at school? In front of everyone? He had a vague memory of being in the ambulance and of being in pain.

“Does it hurt a lot?” Charlie’s voice was laced with concern. Nick smiled sleepily at him. He loved Charlie so much. He didn’t want him to look so worried. “It’s not too bad,” he slurred. “I’m so sleepy.”

The nurse who had entered the room bustled over to him, “before you go back to sleep Nicholas I just need to do a few checks.” She proceeded to check his blood pressure, his reactions, she shone a light in his eyes which caused him to cry out in pain. “Too bright” he moaned.

“I’m sorry,” the nurse was apologetic. “That was the last test. You can nod back off now.” She turned to Sarah. “Everything looks as expected. With his concussion and the effects of the anaesthetic I expect he’ll be asleep until morning. We will move him up to the ward. Visiting hours are over now. Best you come back first thing tomorrow?”

Sarah frowned. Charlie looked horrified at the thought of leaving Nick by himself so soon after his surgery. “I really don’t want to leave him. Is there anyway I can stay?” Sarah looked at the nurse pleadingly. The nurse smiled. “I promise we will take care of him for you. But of course you can stay if you want to.” Sarah sighed in relief. She’d have to phone her neighbour to sort out Nellie but Nick wouldn’t be alone. That’s all that mattered. She couldn’t cope if he woke up in the night, confused and in pain without her there. “Thank you.”

“Not at all, why don’t we go and get him settled and then meet you up on ward 5 in about half an hour?  Sarah nodded. Charlie leaned over to Nick and kissed his cheek as he slept. “I’ll come see you tomorrow after school, “ he whispered in his ear, “I love you babe.” Nick hummed a response in his sleep and Charlie smiled. Got he loved that boy so much.

Sarah and Charlie watched as Nick’s bed was wheeled away to the lift. Sarah gave Charlie a smile. “Do you need a lift home love?” Charlie shook his head, “I just text my mum, she’ll be in the car park to pick me up in ten.” Now that he knew Nick was ok it was like the adrenaline that had kept him going was waring off. He felt shaky and tired. He just wanted to go home and sleep. “You’ve had quite a shock today Charlie, we all have. Make sure you look after yourself too ok?” Sarah walked with him to the car park and spoke with Jane through the car window while Charlie collapsed in the passenger seat.

“Sarah, I’m so sorry about Nick, how’s he doing?” Her voice was kind and laced with worry. “He’s ok, a nasty concussion and a bad break in his leg. He can’t remember the accident yet, but the doctors are hopeful he’ll make a full recovery. I’m just heading back up to stay with him tonight in case he wakes up.”

“Oh that’s such a relief, “ Jane was fond of Nick. He’d proven himself over and over again to be a good influence and support for Charlie. They complimented each other. It had taken her a while to see that.

Charlie was scrolling through the group text chat, he’d better update his friends.

Charlie:  hey guys. Nicks out of surgery.

Elle: oh thank goodness! How is he?

Sahar: I’ve been so worried. Is he ok?

Charlie: he’s very confused and tired. He didn’t remember the accident. He fell back to sleep pretty much straight away. Sarah is going to stay with him overnight.

Tao: are you ok Charlie?

Charlie read Tao’s message. He always looked out for him. Was he ok? It had been a hell of a day. He knew he needed to eat something when he got home. Maybe some company would help. He opened his private chat with Tao.

Charlie: wanna come over to mine? I could use a friend.

Tao: I’m on my way….

Charlie: give it ten mins I’m still in the hospital car park.

Charlie chuckled quietly. Tao was such a fiercely loyal friend. He returned to the group chat.

Charlie: I’m ok. I’m going to come and see him again tomorrow. Turning my phone off for a bit now so I’ll see you guys at school.

He switched his phone onto do not disturb before any more messages could come through. His mum had said goodbye to Jane and was pulling out of the car park space. “I’ve kept some dinner warm for you darling, do you think you can manage some?” Charlie sighed. “I’ll try, Tao is coming over, I’m sure he’ll make sure I do.” Jane smiled  softly at him. She was so proud of how well he was managing his eating.  If having Tao over would help then she was more than happy for him to come over.

“Ok but just for a little while. It’s a school night and you’ve had a big shock today.”

Chapter Text

Charlie had quickly showered and dressed in pyjamas, paired with one of Nick’s hoodies just in time for Tao arriving.  He needed a friend, right now.  Tori was out with Michael, so he couldn’t talk to her and his parents had been great today, but he needed comfort from a friend right now. Tao always had his back, like that.   Tao enveloped Charlie in a massive bear hug. He pulled away and studied his best friends face. Charlie’s face was pale, his eyes were tired and puffy like he’d been crying a lot. Tao took Charlie by the hand and guided him to his bedroom.  Jane greeted Tao as they were half way up the stairs, announcing that she would bring them up hot drinks soon.   

Charlie flopped down on his bed. The adrenaline of the days events had long wore off and he was absolutely knackered. He hated to think about Nick laying in hospital though. He couldn’t believe this had happened.  His heart stopped the moment he had saw that Nick had lost his footing as he ran towards the goal post with rugby ball tucked neatly under his arm. It had all happened in slow motion. The way Nick tripped and went crashing down, head first. The way the two St John’s players tumbled down on top of him. The sound echoing as his head collided with a goal post. The gasps and screams around him. The sound of Sarah’s pained shriek from beside him as she witnessed her little boy fall. Charlie had wasted no time in leaping up and racing down on to the pitch.  The sight of his beautiful boyfriend laying ever so still on the grass with his eyes closed, blood pooling from the gash on his forehead and the mangled state of his leg, would never leave him.  He’d never been more terrified than he had been in that moment.  

“Charlie…”  Tao’s voice snapped him out of his torturous train of thoughts.   He glanced over to see his friend looking at him intently.  “You okay?” Tao asked, his voice thick with concern.   “Yeah…just thinking…” Charlie sighed.   “About Nick?” Tao asked.  Charlie nodded.  “I can’t believe this has happened to him.”  Tao scooted over closer to Charlie on the bed.  “He’s going to be okay though, yeah?” He asked as a feeling of dread washed over him.  Was Nick really okay?    “He was in surgery for 4 hours, tao.” Charlie sighed. “That’s so long!!! He looks so….so small and unlike Nick.”  He croaked out, his emotions taking over again.   “The doctors reckon he will be fine…in time.” Charlie added. “He’s going to be out of rugby for a long time.  The doctor says it could take at least 3 months for the bone to heal.”   Tao put his hand on Charlie’s shoulder.  “He’s in the best place and his mum is with him, isn’t she?”  He questioned.  Charlie nodded as he let out a teary smile.  “Sarah pretty much refused to leave the hospital.” He chuckled softly.   “She couldn’t bare the thought of leaving him alone…I’m so glad he’s not alone.” He sighed.   “Is he allowed visitors?” Tao asked.  Charlie nodded.  “Yeah. The ward visiting times are 2-4pm and 7-8pm, I think.”   Tao just nodded. He would speak to the Paris Squad and try and arrange for them to visit Nick, he knew he’d like that.   Jane interrupted the boys conversation by knocking on the door before entering carrying two mugs of steaming hot chocolate, the full works, whipped cream and marshmallows.  She set them on the side, reminding them both that it was in fact a school night and that Tao would need to be going home soon.   

Sarah sat dosing on the chair next to Nick’s bedside.  He had been moved to the ward a few hours ago.  He was in a private room, due to his concussion he needed complete peace and quiet.  The lights were dimmed.  Sarah’s sister Diane had dropped off an overnight bag for Nick a little while earlier.  Some pyjamas, as she knew her nephew would prefer that offer the cheap hospital cotton gown that he was currently sporting. Some fresh clothes to go home in when he was discharged, toothbrush, toothpaste and some underwear, as well as his phone charger. Nick wouldn’t be spending too much time on his phone though. The doctor had mentioned that he should limit his screen time due to the confusion. She brought the basic essentials and a book and some magazines for her sister.   

Nick felt weird.  His head still felt heavy, not as much as before. He felt pain. Intense pain in his right leg.  It felt like a tonne weight, like it was being held down by cement or something.  There was that irritating beeping sound again. Beep, beep, beep.  It really was annoying.  He rolled his head to the side as he tried to blink his eyes open. His head hurt so much. His vision blurred as he tried to recall where he was.  What the hell was going on?  He blinked his eyes again as he tried to adjust to his surrounding.  White. White walls. White ceiling.  The room was dimly lit but even that was irritating his head. Everything just felt too bright.  That strong sterile smell. He remembered that from before.  That was right. He was in hospital. It all began to make sense now. He rolled his head to the other side.  His mum was still here???  She was sleeping soundly in the chair, a white blanket draped across her lap. What time was it??   Nick grimaced as he had a sour taste in his mouth. He suddenly didn’t feel very good as he felt bile rising in his throat. He was going to be sick, wasn’t he??   “Mum..” He whispered. His heart began racing quickly.  He didn’t have the energy to move much, but he knew he didn’t have much time.  “Mum!” He said a little louder, hearing a little moan escape her lips.  Sarah blinked her eyes open. She could have swore that she heard Nick’s voice. She rubbed her eyes as she sat up, slowly. Glancing at her son, who was very much awake. His eyes were wide, his face was very pale, slightly green tinged.  She quickly understood.   “You feel sick, baby??” She said as she swung in to full ninja mode. Grabbing the little sick bowl from the side and using the bed controls to raise Nick ever so slightly so that he was in a semi, up right position. Nick let out a little groan on confirmation as she placed the bowl in his lap just in time as he leaned over and vomited.  “Oh, sweetheart.” She soothed as she rubbed his back as he got sick.  The nurse had warned her that this may happen. It was a natural reaction to the anaesthesia, combined with the fact that Nick was majorly concussed. It was fully expected.   Nick threw up another few times before relaxing back against the pillows, feeling completely exhausted.  Sarah moved the little bowl to the side before pouring some water from the jug into a little paper cup, popping a straw in and holding it up to her son’s lips.  “Here you go sweetheart.” She told him as Nick gratefully took a sip from the straw.  “Slow sips..” Sarah told him, gently. “You don’t want to upset your tummy.”    Nick moved his head away as an indication that he didn’t want anymore water.  Sarah sat the cup down and gently brushed her fingers through her son’s hair.  “How are you feeling?”  She asked him. She hoped he wasn’t in too much discomfort.  “My head and leg really hurt, mum.”  Nick mumbled as he squeezed his eyes shut.  Why was he struggling to keep them open? “Everything feels too bright..” he frowned.  Sarah rubbed his upper arm softly.  “You’ve got a concussion, darling.” She explained.  “Your head is probably going to feel a bit poorly for a while.”   Nick just responded with a groan.  “Can you remember what happened?”   Nick blinked his eyes open again, he tried his hardest to think back. Ah yes! Truham versus St John’s match. He remembered the second half of the match. They were losing, even though he had scored a few try’s himself. St John’s were a bigger and stronger team.  He remembered getting the ball and running towards the goal post. The sounds of the crowd chanting his name. He ran as fast as his legs would let him. He was almost there.  This was it. He was going to score. They might actually have a chance of winning and then he felt himself falling forward as he tripped up over his own feet.  The rest of it was a blur. He just remembered feeling burning pain in his leg and then it all went dark.      “I messed up…” he sighed.

Sarah had been watching him, she could tell by the creases on his forehead that he was in deep thought.  She frowned when she heard him say that.  “What do you mean, poppet?”   She hoped Nick wasn’t worrying about the game.  “We could have won.” Nick sighed.  He definitely was thinking about that.  She sighed as she gripped his hand. “No, Nick.” She told him firmly.  “It was an accident. You didn’t do anything wrong.” She assured him.  “Everyone will be so mad at me.” He replied guilty.  His mates were going to hate him for purposely throwing the game. He felt so guilty.  Coach! She was going to be so disappointed in him.  She had been so positive that they were going to win this game and they could have if it wasn’t for him.   “Absolutely not.” Sarah said sternly. She wasn’t going to sit there and listen to her son beat himself up over something that was just an unfortunate accident. “Look at me, sweetheart.” She asked him softy watched as Nick focused his eyes on her. “It was an accident, Nick.” She repeated. “You have no idea how worried everyone’s been about you.” She informed him.  “My phones been dinging all evening with messages from your friends, coach Singh, Auntie Di…even your brother.” She told him.   “It could have happened to anyone, baby.” She sighed.  “Please don’t beat yourself up over it.”  She knew how much of a sensitive soul her son could be. Nick glanced up at his mum with watery eyes. He knew she was right, though.  She was always right. She never steered him wrong. He was so lucky to have her.   “Okay?” Sarah continued. She wanted Nick to confirm it, that he accepted it was only an accident.   “Ok….” he responded sleepily.    “Good!” Sarah nodded as she kissed his forehead. She glanced at her watch. It was 4am.  Nick needed all the rest he could get.  “I’ll buzz the nurse and ask her to top up your morphine so that you can go back to sleep, ok?” She smiled as she pressed the little alert button on the wall.  Nick just nodded, tiredly as he closed his eyes, wishing the room would just stop spinning. He was tired but the pain was stopping him from sleeping.  

The nurse arrived within a few minutes. She did a few checks whilst Nick was awake. Checking his blood pressure and temperature to ensure he wasn’t running a fever as it can be a common side effect of concussion. She topped his IV up with morphine and cleaning the sick bowl out, switching it with a clean one before leaving them to it. Nick felt the effects of the morphine work almost instantly as he closed his eyes as the exhaustion took over his body, allowing him to fall in to a blanket of darkness.

Charlie spent the night tossing and turning in his bed. He kept replaying the accident on a loop in his head. He kept hearing the sound of Nick’s head smacking into the goal post. Seeing Nick unconscious.  Every time he closed his eyes he was back on the rugby pitch. He sighed and sat up in bed. Looking at his clock he was it was only 5am. Far too early to get up. His stomach was growling. His mum had managed to persuade him to eat a little of his dinner after Tao had left but it had been hard going and in the end she had settled for a protein shake. He checked his phone for a message from Sarah….nothing. He was partly relieved as no news was most likely good news, but he wished he was there to see how Nick was for himself. He decided to send her a text.

morning Sarah. Hope you got some sleep. How is Nick doing? Did he have A good night? Would it be ok if I came to see him after school today?

He flopped back against the pillow. He still had another 2 hours before his alarm went off. School was going to be hell. He wasn’t sure he could face all the questions about Nick. It would definitely be the talk of the school, rugby king Nick Nelson knocked unconscious and taken away in an ambulance. He was going to be questioned about it all day. He briefly wondered if his mum would let him stay home today….she might. But it probably wouldn’t be good for him to be by himself all day. He needed his friends to lean on.

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Sarah rubbed her stiff neck and stretched. The nurses had been ever so kind and given her a comfy chair to sleep in but it wasn’t her cosy bed at home and she’d spent most of the night awake, checking on Nick or speaking quietly to the nurses as they came in to do regular obs on him throughout the night. She glanced over to where Nick was still asleep. His forehead was creased in pain. The bruising on his face had really come out in the night and looked so dark against his pale skin. She picked up her phone. 6.30am. Sarah sighed. It had only been a couple of hours since he last fell asleep after being sick yet again. She hoped he could rest for a little while longer. She scrolled through her text notifications. So many people cared about Nick, it really warmed her heart. She saw that Charlie had messaged a little while ago and she smiled at his message.

hi darling. of course you can visit. I know Nick will want you here. He’s had an ok night, he’s been in some pain and has been sick again. He’s asleep at the moment.

She closed the app and put her phone back on the side. The door opened and the nurse who had been checking on him all night appeared.

“Morning Sarah,” Sarah gave her a smile. The nurse turned the brightness up slightly on the wall lights. “Time to wake up I’m afraid Nick,” she walked over to his bed. Nick stirred, his nose scrunched up as his face twisted in pain. He let out a sleepy groan.

“It’s too early,” Sarah chuckled. He sounded almost like his normal self in the morning!

“I know, I’m sorry. But we need to do your obs and get breakfast in you before the doctor comes to do his rounds.” She bustled around the room, making checks and writing things down on his chart. She shone her torch into his eyes again, much to his annoyance. “Can you remember what day it is?”

Nick thought for a while. “Umm… Thursday?” The nurse smiled encouragingly.

“Yes, well done! Do you know why you are here?” Nick closed his eyes against the brightness, fighting back the nausea in his throat. “Rugby accident,” he gritted out. The nurse looked at him in concern. “Are you still feeling sick Nicholas?” He gave a small nod and pressed his lips together. She quickly grabbed a sick bowl and helped him into a sitting position just in time for him to empty what little was left in his stomach. It was mostly bile and he didn’t feel any relief after throwing up. Sarah rubbed his back gently, murmuring reassurances to him.

“I’ll ask the doctor about some anti sickness meds. It’s a very normal symptom of his concussion but he’s going to get dehydrated if he carries on bringing everything up.”

“Thank you,” Sarah smiled at her warmly. She was so young. She didn’t look much older than David. But she had been amazing throughout the night and Sarah was so grateful for her compassion. Sarah turned her attention back to Nick. “I’m sorry you feel so poorly baby,” she stroked his hair gently. Nick just hummed in response. The room felt like he was at sea in a storm, everything was moving. His leg was throbbing rhythmically. He wished Charlie was here too. Was he ok? He hated thinking about how much he had worried him yesterday. “Can I text Charlie?” He opened his eyes and looked as his mum pleadingly. “I need to tell him I’m ok.”

Sarah smiled softly at him, “baby you need to stay off your phone for a little while. Looking at a screen is a terrible idea.” Tears sprang to Nick’s eyes. “Please? He’ll be so worried.” Sarah sighed.

“I tell you what, I’ll phone him and let you talk to him - old school style. Ok?” Nick smiled at her. She really was the best.

Sarah picked up her phone and clicked on Charlie’s contact. It rang for about half a second before Charlie picked up. She heard the panic in his voice. “Sarah? Is everything ok, why are you phoning me?”

Sarah interrupted his spiral, “everything is fine darling. Nick is awake and he wanted to text you but with his concussion I said that wasn’t a good idea. Would you like to talk to him for a minute?” She heard Charlie’s sigh of relief, “oh my god, yes please!”

“Ok I’ll hand him over. Only a quick one tho as he’s still very tired and feeling sick.” She passed the phone to Nick who cradled it against his ear.

“Char?” He sniffled.

“Other my god Nick. It’s so good to hear your voice. How are you feeling?”

Nick smiled, this was a good distraction from his pain and nausea. “I’m ok.  Very sore and feel so sick. But I feel less confused today.” Charlie relaxed against his pillow. “That’s good news. I was so worried about you.”

“I’m sorry for worrying you. I’m sorry for being such an idiot and getting into this mess.” Charlie couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He wasn’t going to let Nick feel guilty about this for one second.

“Don’t be ridiculous! It was an accident. Everyone is so worried about you. My phone has been blowing up with messages.”

“That’s nice….” Nick’s responses were slowing down and Charlie could tell he needed to sleep. “I love you Nick, get some sleep I’ll be over straight after school.”

“Love you,” Sarah took the phone back from Nick as he nodded off. She said goodbye to Charlie as the nurse returned with a syringe of medicine.

“This should help with the nausea” she said cheerily as she injected  it into his IV.

“Is it ok for him to be so sleepy?” Sarah stroked his arm as he slept.

“Completely fine. It’s the best way for him to heal. Would you like a cup of tea?” Sarah nodded gratefully. Today she was going to need an awful lot of caffeine.

Charlie put the phone on his bedside table and let out a sigh of relief. Nick sounded in pain but he was alive, awake, his memory seemed to be back. All good signs.

“Who were you talking to?” Charlie jumped in fright.

“Jesus Tori!” He looked over to the doorway where she was stood, still in her dressing gown but already drinking her lemonade through a straw. “I just spoke to Nick. He’s not allowed to use his phone so Sarah called me for him.”

“How is he?” Although she’d never admit it out loud, Tori was really fond of Nick. He’d been there for her brother when he needed him the most. She’d been horrified when the news had filtered through about the rugby accident.

“He’s ok. He was very sleepy still and obviously in a lot of pain. I’m going to visit him after school.” Tori sat down next to him on the bed. “Are you sure you should go in today? I bet mum would let you stay home.”

Charlie sighed, “yeah I think I need to be around people, you know?” Tori fake shuddered. “People? Yuck!” She smiled softly at Charlie. “I’m glad he’s going to be ok. Tell him I said hi.” Charlie hugged her, “I will, thanks Tor.”

Charlie was right, school was hell. He couldn’t go anywhere without being accosted by various Truham boys asking after Nick. One person had filmed the accident and thrust it under his nose asking him if Nick would want to see it. Tao had quickly ushered him into the art room at lunchtime and closed the door loudly. Charlie slumped against the back of the door. “I know Nick is popular but this is insane,” he sighed.

“Hello boys,” Mr Ayaji was sat as his desk looking at portfolios. “Need a quiet place for lunch?” He asked kindly.

“Yes please,” Charlie replied. “People just keep asking me about Nick, it’s exhausting.”

Mr Ajayi smiled in understanding. The staff all obviously knew about the accident. Priya was beside herself after it happened, blaming herself for Nick being in hospital. They shouldn’t have played St John’s after last time with how rough they were. It had taken a lot of talking for her to finally accept that it was simply just an accident. “I understand, I’m glad to hear he’s doing ok. Send him my best wishes when you see him.”

“Thanks sir,” Charlie, Tao and Isaac sat down and opened up their lunches. Charlie began methodically eating his crackers, cheese and grapes. Tao and Isaac demolished theirs quickly once they realised Charlie was eating ok. They enjoyed the peace and quiet for half an hour before afternoon tutor and it all started again. Charlie was so relieved when the final bell went and he raced to the bus stop to catch the bus. “Text us later Charlie, let us know how he is and if he’s up for more visitors later?”

“I will! “ Charlie grinned at them as he climbed up to the top deck of the bus. He couldn’t wait to get to the hospital.

Nick had dozed on and off for the rest of the day. The medicine had eased his nausea, allowing him to sleep. He wasn’t able to eat anything substantial which had worried Sarah but the doctors weren’t overly concerned yet. Sarah had popped home for a couple of hours to shower and get some food and walk Nellie while Diane sat with Nick. She’d been back at the hospital for about an hour when visiting hours began. “Charlie will be here soon darling,” she lent over Nick and kissed his cheek. Nick opened one eye and looked at her blearily, “I love Charlie,” he closed his eye and went back to sleep. Sarah chuckled to herself.

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Charlie got on the bus that evening after going home from school, having dinner and doing homework as that was part of the agreement. Jane didn’t mind him going to the hospital as long as he kept on top of his school work. He was desperate to get to the hospital to see Nick. School had been very eventful. He thinks he had answered the same questions at least twenty times. It was nice seeing how poplar Nick was. How cared for he was. Everyone was so worried. Asking curious questions of when Nick would be back and how he’s doing, asking Charlie to pass on their well wishes.  Charlie couldn’t help feel a little nervous as he sat on the bus. Yes, he had spoke to Nick on the phone this morning, but he hadn’t actually seen him properly since his surgery, apart from when he popped in to recovery yesterday, but Nick had been completely out of it. He hoped that the doctors had managed to get the pain under control as he couldn’t bare the thought of his Nick being in pain.  Charlie snapped out of his thoughts as he realised the bus had pulled in to the hospital grounds. Trust him to nearly miss his stop. He couldn’t have that. He was too excited to see Nick.  Charlie thanked the driver before heading over to the main entrance to the hospital. He glanced at the text massage that Sarah had sent him last night after Nick had veen settled on the ward.  Floor 3. Ward 53. Room number 6.  That’s where Nick was.  Charlie took the loft to the 3rd floor and followed the signs towards Nick’s ward.  He read all the numbers on the doors looking for number 6. He smiled warmly at the nurses at the little station as he walked past before stopping outside Nick’s little private room. He took a deep breath before knocking gently on the door. Was Nick sleeping? Was he okay? Was he intruding? All the little thoughts racing through his mind, his breathing picking up as his anxiety took over. That was until he heard Sarah’s soft voice on the other side of the door. “Come in.”  He exhaled  heavy breath before pushing the door open and taking a step inside. 

Nick was laying in a similar position as last night. His eyes closed as she slept soundly, the first thing Charlie noticed was how much more prominent the bruising on his face was. The area around the stitches was a deep purple colour, the bruising carried on down the side of his face.  His broken leg stuck out of the thin blanket that covered him.  He still had oxygen prongs in his nose and the IV Was still in his left hand, feeding him morphine and well needed fluids.   Sarah smiled warmly at Charlie as he entered. “Hello darling.” She smiled as she stood up and enveloped him in a tight hug.    “I’m sorry I should have messaged first.” Charlie mumbled softly. The thought had barely occurred to him that Nick might’ve been sleeping. “I didn’t even think that he might be asleep..” Sarah quickly shushed him. “Nonsense.” She smiled.  “He’s been talking about you all day, when he’s not been napping.” She laughed softly.  Charlie felt his heart swell.  “He’s been sleeping a lot, then?” He asked, feeling slightly concerned. Was this normal?     Sarah let out a sigh and nodded. “I was very concerned but the nurse has assured me that it’s completely normal with head injuries.” She explained.  Charlie’s eyes fell upon Nick’s untouched lunch tray on the side and he frowned. Sarah followed his gaze.  “He hasn’t got much of an appetite either.” She sighed.  “The nurse gave him some anti-nausea medicine this morning, he’s managed to keep down a few bites of toast, but that’s it.”    Charlie sighed. Maybe he would have an appetite later for some of the snacks that he had picked up from the corner shop before getting the bus to the hospital.  “Everyone’s so worried about him.” Charlie told Sarah as he sat down, he then at Nick and hesitated for a moment before glancing at Sarah. “There’s something you should know.” He said softly.  Sarah glanced at Charlie, curiously.  “What’s that?”  Charlie cleared his throat and sighed again.  “Um…there’s a video.” He stuttered. Sarah frowned. “Video? Video of what?” She asked.  Charlie took a deep breath.  “There’s a video of Nick’s accident circulating the school.”  He informed her.  “I don’t know who posted it but most people have seen it.”   Sarah was horrified.  Who on earth would think it was a good idea to pull out a phone and video her son in that state? That was bad enough, but to post it online? For anyone and everyone to see. That was bang out of order!  “I’ve reported it to Headmaster Barnes..”  Sarah sighed. She knew Nick was going to hate that. Knowing that someone had taken a video of him at his most vulnerable state.   “Should we tell Nick?” Charlie asked quietly, glancing at his sleeping boyfriend.  “I think we’ll need to eventually.” Sarah nodded. “The good thing is he’s not allowed his phone for a few days.”  

 Nick could hear voices above him. He just assumed it was the doctor talking to his mum and was about to allow himself to drop off again when he heard a familiar voice. Charlie! Charlie was here??? Nick blinked his eyes open again and let out a heavy groan. His head hurt as soon as he opened his eyes. Even though the room was dimly lit. Goddamn this flaming concussion. He hates feeling like this. His leg was hurting as well but he knew if he asked for more painkillers, they would just knock him out and he’d kiss Charlie’s visit and he didn’t want that so he’d need to just grin and bare it for now. He let another moan escape his lips. Sarah glanced down at Nick.  “Hello sleepyhead.” She smiled fondly as she brushed her hair through his hair. Nick gave her a tired smile before he rolled his head to the other side. Grinning from ear to ear as he saw his boyfriend.  “Hi…” he breathed out. Charlie smiled back as he bent down to place a kiss on Nick’s forehead being mindful off the stitches.  “Hi…” 

Sarah decided to give the boys some privacy and left the room for a short while to stretch her legs and get another coffee.  

Charlie adjusted Nick’s bed so that he was sitting up right a little.  “Does that feel okay?” He asked. Nick nodded. He still felt dizzy and his head ached but he didn’t feel as sick as before, thanks to whatever magic substance was running through his veins from his IV drip.   “How are you feeling?” Charlie asked as he took hold of Nick’s hand.   “I feel fine.” Nick lied but Charlie could see right through his lies.  “Be honest with me Nick…” he said, raising his eyebrow.  Nick sighed. There was no fooling Charlie.  “I feel like shit.” He admitted.  He’d heard from his mate Christian how awful concussions were as he’d suffered one last year but he’d never imagined it would feel as rough as this and  then the broken leg to top it off.  “My head really hurts, I feel so dizzy ever time I move.” He hugged.  “My leg is sore and I can barely move it because this bloody cast is so awkward.” He moaned.  Charlie sighed as he rubbed his arm. “That doesn’t sound like fun, at all.” He sympathised with him.  He couldn’t help the little smirk that crept on to his face as he saw that Nick’s toes were peaking out the end of his cast. He gave his big toe a little wiggle. “This little piggy went to market…” he sung, trying to cheer his boyfriend up. Trying to get him to laugh. It worked. Nick let out a chesty chuckle.  “Charlie…” he laughed. His boyfriend was so silly.   “I brought you some gifts to cheer you up.” Charlie smiled, hoping to keep lightening the mood as he unzipped his backpack and pulled out a king sized Oreo chocolate bar and some chilli heatwave Doritos. Two of Nick’s favourite snacks.  “I know you’re not feeling very hungry right now but you can have these when you’re feeling better.” He smiled. Nick grinned. It was all the small details which made him love Charlie more and more each day. He then pulled out a sharpie marker and smirked. “I was also thinking I could be the first to sign your cast?” He asked with a cheeky grin on his face.  Nick smirked. “Definitely!!!” He grinned. “As long as you keep it PG.” he laughed.

Charlie could’ve written a million things on Nick’s plaster cast but none of them were very appropriate as they’d be displayed on Nick’s leg for the next couple of months so he just settled for ‘Get well soon babe, love charlie.’ He then proceeded to doodle a bunch of love hearts and smiley faces before putting the lid back on the sharpie.  “I can’t believe I’ve broken my leg.” Nick hugged as he crossed his arms over his chest.  Charlie rolled his eyes.  “You better believe it baby, you’re going to have to wear that cast for at least a few months…” Nick groaned loudly in response. “Don’t remind me.  It’s horrendous.”   “Oi!” Charlie exclaimed playfully. “I hope you’re not mocking my beautiful masterpiece.”  Nick chuckled.  “It looks ten times better already.” He chuckled before yawning and then groaning again.  “WHY am I so tired??” He whined.  “ALL I’ve done the last 24 hours is sleep or vomit.” He scowled.

“You’re concussed, Nicholas…” Charlie rolled his eyes.  “You need sleep. You need rest…”  “You sound like my doctor when you call me Nicholas.” Nick snorted. “You’d make a hot doctor..” he laughed. Charlie chuckled. “Nick!!”   Nick squeezed his eyes shut as his headache intensified. He quickly opened them again, hoping Charlie hadn’t noticed.  “Nick? You okay?”  Nick nodded his head, bad move as it just made the room spin more. The sick feeling in his tummy had returned.  He hated this.  “I can’t believe all of those people in the crowd saw me fall.”  Nick complained as he relaxed back against his pillows.  “I supposed I should be grateful it was only half of the school and not the full school..” Nick continued until he saw Charlie’s eyes go wide and his face pale. Sarah returned at that exact moment with a coffee for herself and a tea for Charlie, along with some Apple juice for Nick, although she wasn’t full convinced he would want to drink it. She had just walked in and heard the tail end of the conversation. Nick glanced at Charlie.  “What??” He questioned, curiously. Charlie shook his head quickly. “Nothing.” He said as he shared a dubious glance with Sarah.  Nick frowned. He wasn’t dumb.  He knew Charlie wasn’t telling him something. “Charlie? What aren’t you telling me?”

Charlie remained silent as he glanced at Sarah for backup. They couldn’t hide this from Nick, not now. It would be lying and that didn’t sit right with him.  Sarah sighed as she sat the drinks down and sat next to the bed. She glanced at her son.  Nick glanced between them both. Did Sarah know something that he didn’t, too?   “Mum?” Nick pleaded with her.  Sarah squeezed his hand. “Darling…someone has posted a video.” She started watching as Nick’s eye flew open in horror.  “Video?”  He stammered.  Sarah nodded. “Of you getting hurt at a the game.”   Nick’s face paled instantly and he started breathing quicker. If he hadn’t felt sick before, he definitely did now.  Everyone could see him being tackled and knocked unconscious. He felt as if he was beginning to hyperventilate as his throat began to close up. His breathing intensified, causing the heart monitor beside the bed to begin beeping rapidly.  “Nicky baby, calm down.” Sarah soothed. “I…can’t…I..” Nick was trying to calm down but the thought of that video being out there for anyone to see was just horrific.  “Nick!”  That was Charlie’s voice and it was firm. “Breathe!” Instructed. “You need to breathe! In and out, look, copy me…” Nick glanced at Charlie. Copying him as he inhaled and exhaled and slowly his breathing began to regulate. Nick glanced between them both. “I want to see..”

Charlie and Sarah shared a glance.  “Nicky baby, you’re not supposed to be looking at screens.” Sarah told him.  “It’ll make your head feel worse.”   “I need to see.” Nick replied in a wobbly voice.  “Please??” His voice full of desperation. Charlie glanced at Sarah, who let out a deep sigh before nodding. She didn’t know if she could bare to watch that happen to her son again but Nicky was adamant he wanted to see it.   Charlie pulled out his phone and fiddled about with it for a few minutes before downing at Nick for confirmation.  “You sure?”  Nick just nodded. He felt nauseas again because of his confusion. His leg felt like it was about to fall off, it was so sore and his head felt like someone was repeatedly smacking him with something, but he needed to see. “Show me, Char..”

Charlie pressed play and held the phone in front of Nick’s face so that he could see. He turned his eyes away as did Sarah as neither one of them really wanted to see the moment Nick was injured again.  Nick watched as the two giant St John’s players crashed in to him, sending him flying forward. He watched as his head collided with the goal post. He winced, feeling the same pain. He watched the way his leg bent weirdly as he hit the ground. He watched as his opponents climbed off his body but he remained on the ground, unmoving. He watched as chaos unfolded. One by one people arrived next to him. Chris, Coach, Charlie…his mum and then the video cut off.  Nick blinked back tears. He hadn’t realised the severity of what had happened until actually watching it back.  He swallowed trying to rid the sick feeling that was climbing up his throat. “We’re going to find who posted this.” Charlie assured him. “Barnes already knows about it.”  Nick’s  face paling, instantly.  “Nick?” Sarah asked.  Nick’s hand shot up to cover his mouth as he began to gag.  Charlie jumped into action straight away as he realised what was happening. He grabbed the sick bowl from the side and held it under Nick’s chin just in time for his stomach to do a somersault and he vomited.   “Oh, baby.” Sarah cooed as she rubbed soothing circles on his back. It was mostly bile again combined with the little toast he had managed to stomach from earlier.  “That’s it sweetheart, just get it all up.” Sarah rubbed his back.  Nick coughed and spluttered. It burned the back of his throat. He threw up once more before exhaustedly collapsing against the pillows as a few tears rolled down his cheeks.  Charlie held picked up a cup of water and held the straw out to Nick. He took a few sips and sunk back down. He squeezed his eyes shut.  “Is the pain bad again, sweetheart?” Sarah asked.  Nick didn’t even try to protest. He just gave a tired nod of his head.  “I’ll go see if the nurse can top up your pain medication.” Sarah said getting to her feet.  “No!” Nick said suddenly as he squinted his eyes open again.  “Charlie just got here!” He argued as he pulled himself forward. He grimaced as the pain hit him like a tonne of bricks. “Besides.  The morphine makes me so sleepy and knocks me out for hours.”   Charlie glanced at his watch. “Nick you need your rest.” He told him as he gently pushed him back against the pillows.  “It’s ten to eight anyway…visiting is nearly over.” He announced . “I’ll need to leave soon anyway…I promise I will be back tomorrow and I may even bring some of the gang with me?” She suggested. “How does that sound?”   Nick sighed. He knew Charlie was right. He needed to rest and the thought of seeing Charlie again tomorrow along with his friends sounded really good. “Okay.” He agreed. Charlie smiled as he kissed his forehead, just as Sarah returned back with the nurse. She did the usual checks, cleaned out the sick bowl. Shone an irritatingly bright light in his eyes. Replaced the sick bowl. Injected his IV with Some strong painkillers. She explained to Sarah that they were more effective than the morphine and would probably help Nick get a better sleep and more anti sickness medicine, before asking him he’d like some  toast before the medication kicked in. She wasn’t surprised when he declined the offer. There was always breakfast time.   She then left them to it.  Nick began to feel the effects of the medicine kicking in as his eyes few heavy. He was able to say goodbye to Charlie before he gave in to the tiredness and closed his eyes, drifting off.

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Sarah peered cautiously into Nick’s hospital room. It was only a little after 6am, she wanted to be back before Nick woke up. The nurses had persuaded her to go home for the night. The drugs they had given him would knock him out for hours apparently and they emphasised the importance of her looking after herself. “You’ll be no good to him if you get poorly with exhaustion.” She finally relented at around 11pm and she had to admit she felt a lot better for a solid few hours sleep. She took in the sight in front of her. Nick was still sleeping soundly. It didn’t look like he had moved at all! His forehead was still creased in pain and she winced at the sight of his bruised and battered face.

She sat down quietly next to him just as the nurse arrived to do the morning obs.

“Morning Sarah, feel better after a good sleep?” She smiled warmly at her as she began flicking through Nick’s notes.

“So much better, thank you. How was he last night? Did he wake up at all?” Sarah was anxious that Nick had woken up needing her in the night.

“He was dead to the world all night. Think he was snoring at one point,” she chuckled. Sarah breathed a sigh of relief. Hopefully he’d be over this horrible nausea now and ready to start eating and getting his strength back up. She watched curiously as the nurses adjusted his IV and fiddled with the controls. “It’s time to wake up Nick,” she cheerily jostled his shoulder. Nick groaned. He was having a lovely dream about him and Charlie on the beach. He really didn’t want to wake up. He opened his eyes a crack. The light wasn’t quite so painful this morning so he risked opening them fully. His head was still sore and he could feel his leg throbbing. His ribs hurt too. But he definitely felt better than yesterday. “Morning,” he mumbled. He answered the nurses questions, she was pleased with his cognitive responses.

“Excellent job Nicholas. We’ll have you out of here in no time! Can we get you some breakfast?” Nick thought about it. His stomach was so sore but that was probably because he’d spent so long throwing up. He knew he needed to try to eat. Maybe it would help? “Maybe some toast?”

Sarah beamed at him. “I’m so proud of you Nicky. Are you feeling a bit better then?” Nick turned his head to face her as she adjusted his bed to help him sit up at bit.

“I don’t feel like I’m going to be sick anymore,” he sighed. “I’m a bit scared to eat in case I throw up again though.” Sarah smiled understandingly. She knew how much Nick hated being sick. “I know baby, but you have to try. How’s the pain?”

Nick shrugged his shoulders. “A bit better. Still hurts though.” He couldn’t believe that he was here. In hospital. And that the whole school knew what had happened to him - even worse they had all seen a video of it. Sarah watched the frown deepening on his forehead. “What’s up baby?”

Nick sighed. “I can’t stop thinking about that video. Who would be so cruel to post it ? And then all the people who watched it and shared it. How am I going to go back to school knowing everyone saw me get knocked out?”

Sarah took his hand and squeezed it, she was furious about the video. She’d already emailed Mr Barnes asking for a meeting about what they planned to do about it. “Don’t you worry about that. You have nothing to be ashamed of Nick. All that video shows is a bad rugby accident. You did nothing wrong. Your friends are all on your side and will stick up for you.” Nick nodded. He knew his friends would have his back. But he still felt humiliated by it. He was interrupted from his thoughts by the arrival of breakfast. He sat himself up and began nibbling gingerly on the corner of one slice. He realised he was actually really hungry and the toast was quickly gone.

“Well done!” Sarah smiled at him, handing him his glass of water. “You are doing so much better today Nick!” He gave her a small smile. It was only a slice of toast, but he didn’t feel sick so he would take the win. He settled back down against his pillows and closed his eyes. He was still ever so sleepy. Sarah ruffled his hair gently. “Have a good snooze baby, I’ll be right here.”

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Charlie walked up the steps into Truham. He felt better today, he’d managed to sleep and he had a text from Sarah to say that Nick had had a peaceful night and even managed some breakfast. He was on a mission this morning though. He quickly found his friends and ushered them into a quiet classroom.

“What’s going on?” Tao looked at him with concern. “Is Nick ok?” Charlie sat down on the table and sighed. “Yeah he’s ok. But he found out about the video of him that’s been going round. He’s so upset about it, it literally made him sick. “

“Oh shit,” Tao  muttered. “I can’t believe someone did that.” He looked at Charlie. “So what are you suggesting we do about it?”

“Well, Sarah has already requested to meet with Barnes. She’s livid about the whole thing.” Tao grinned, Nicks mum was such a softie but he could imagine she could be very frightening when protecting her children. “Poor Barnes!” He chuckled.

Charlie agreed, “I know, he doesn’t have a clue what’s about to hit him.” He looked down at his shoes, “but I want to help. I want to know who sent it in the first place.”

“Oh, I know that,” Isaac looked at Charlie.

“What? Who was it? How do you know?” Charlie spluttered. Isaac shrugged his shoulders. “People don’t pay much attention to me, I was sitting in tutor reading my book. I overheard a couple of younger boys talking. Apparently Katie in year 11 at Higgs was filming the match - I think she has a bit of a crush of Nick to be honest,” Charlie rolled his eyes, that sounded about right. “Go on…” he urged.

“Well, she was filming it and apparently Ben snatched her phone off he and sent himself the video?” Charlie’s face reddened. Ben? Ben did this? That made so much sense. He hated Nick for ‘stealing’ Charlie from him. He’d use any excuse to embarrass and humiliate him.

Charlie let out a scream of frustration. “Of course it was Ben,” he spat. “He’s going to pay for doing this to Nick.”

“What do you suggest Charlie?” Tao looked warily at him. “The video is out there now there’s no point asking him to take it down.”

Charlie deflated slightly. “No, I know. But he can’t get away with it…..”

Isaac’s coughed quietly, “I might have an idea?” He grinned. “I’m sure a visit from some of the rugby lads would put him back in his box?” Charlie smiled. He knew what a wimp Ben was, a group of rugby lads could be very intimidating. He sent a text to Sai and they began plotting.

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Nick was bored. He’d napped on and off all day, waking up to eat some dry toast and have a chat with his mum before nodding off again. He wasn’t used to being away from his phone. He didn’t really know what to do with himself without a screen to occupy him! Visiting hours were about to start and he was desperate to see Charlie. His mum had said that some of his other friends might pop by too. He was anxious about them seeing him in this state. He knew that was silly and that they were worried about him. He just felt really vulnerable after the accident and that horrible video of him. Sarah had popped home to feed Nellie so he was sat alone just staring at the ceiling. He looked over at the door as there was a soft knock and Charlie peeked his head round.

“Up for a visitor or two?” Nick smiled and held out his arms for a hug. Charlie rushed over and hugged him as carefully as he could, mindful of all his aches and pains. “You look so much better today,” Charlie grinned at him, examining his face for any traces of pain. Nick nodded. “The nausea has finally gone. I’ve eaten some toast.” Charlie kissed him gently on the lips. “I’m still feeling a bit hazy and forgetful and obviously the pain is still there but I’m so much better than yesterday.” He lent into the hug and Charlie hopped up onto the bed next to him, mindful of his leg and IV drip.

“I’m so glad baby. Do you think you are up for some more visitors? There might be a couple waiting in the corridor to see you?”

Nick smiled at Charlie. The idea of seeing his friends actually sounded really nice right now.  “I’d like that.”   Charlie grinned as he bent over and placed a gentle kiss on Nick’s forehead before popping his head out in to the corridor.  “You guys can come in now…” he annocued.  Nick watched as one by his friends tumbled in to the room. His vulnerabilities of them seeing him like this quickly disappeared and he was just glad to see them.

Tara and Tao were the first to enter the room, both equally shocked at the bruising on Nick’s face. It looked really sore, as did the stitches that were covered by the medical gauze.  Imogen, Elle, Issac, Darcy and Sahar piled in closely behind.   “Hi Nick, how are you feeling?” Tara asked softly.  “I’m okay.” Nick gave them a small smile. “I’m a little sore but the medicine is helping.” He admitted.  They all have him a gentle hug, being careful.    “You must be bored stiff in here without a TV.” Tao commented, instantly noticing the absence of a television in the room.  Nick chuckled softly and shrugged.  “I wouldn’t be able to watch it anyway.” He mumbled.  “Concussion.”   “Ah that sucks!” Tao sighed. “Is your head still feeling poorly?” Elle asked softly.  “A little, yeah.” Nick sighed.  “I don’t feel sick anymore but I’m still really tired.”    “We won’t stay too long.” Tara smiled. “We just wanted to see you.”   “And we brought gifts!” Issac grinned as he and Imogen pulled gift bags from behind their back’s and placed them on the bed.   Nick smiled at them softly.  “You guys really didn’t have to.”   “We wanted to!” Darcy grinned as she held on to a brightly coloured foil get well soon balloon. “Go on!! Open them!”    Nick peered in to the bags, removing the tissue paper. They were filled to the brim with his favourite things including his favourite chocolate and sweets, a little rugby teddy bear and a new mug.   “Thanks guys.” He grinned.  Darcy tied the balloon to the end of his bed.   “When can you come home?”   Nick glanced up.  “Hopefully tomorrow, just waiting on the doctor coming around later.” He replied, eyeing up the chocolate buttons. Charlie smirked as he caught him, he picked the packer up and opened them handing them over.  “Someone’s got their appetite back…”  Nick rolled his eyes as he popped a few of them in his mouth.  Chocolate definitely tastes so much better when you haven’t had it in a few days.  “Oh my god.” Imogen announced as she loomed up from her phone.  “The video has went viral!” She exclaimed.  Nick suddenly paled. His eyes going wide. “It’s had over 15 thousand views.” Issac added in.  “What?” Nick asked in a quiet voice.  Charlie quickly put two and two together and reached out and squeezed Nick’s hand. “No, Nick! Not that video.” He said him gently.  “That’s been removed, I promise.”

Nick visibly relaxed. “God, sorry Nick, I didn’t think,” Imogen looked guilty. “You’ll like this video a lot more. Do you want to see it?”

Nick looked at Charlie for reassurance. “You should watch it,” he encouraged. “I know you are meant to avoid screens but I think it’ll be worth seeing this one. It’s only short.” Nick nodded and took the phone from Imogen. The others watched his face for his reaction. He realised straight away that it was in the changing rooms at school. It was a bit fuzzy, he wasn’t sure if that was the recording or his concussion, but he could clearly see the rugby boys all crowded around someone. Ben? “What’s going on?” Nick asked. He paused the video and looked at Charlie. “Well, we found out who posted the video of your accident…..” he trailed off unsure how to continue. What if Nick was angry? What if this was a really bad idea?

Nick paled. “ it was Ben?” He shouldn’t be surprised. If anyone at Truham wanted to humiliate him it was Ben. “Yeah,” Charlie squeezed his hand, “we couldn’t let him get away with it….”

“It was my idea,” Isaac piped up. “I suggested that a visit from the rugby lads might help him to see the error of his ways..” Nick gaped at him. “They didn’t hurt him did they?” He would never want to be the reason someone was beaten up, no matter how much he hated Ben.

“No, no not at all. Just watch it….” Nick pressed play and watched the scene play out. A small grin appeared on his face which got wider and wider as he watched his rugby friends accuse Ben of leaking the video. They were an intimidating bunch and they had him surrounded. He was stammering and stuttering and trying to deny it but eventually he admitted it. Saying it was just a joke, it was a bit of fun. He was crying his eyes out begging them not to hurt him. The lads didn’t touch him, that was never their plan but Otis turned to the camera and said, “this is Ben. He thought it would be funny to make fun of someone who was having a medical emergency and is currently in hospital. So let’s not share that video. Let’s share this one of the snivelling, crying loser that posted it.” They pushed Ben to the front so his face was in full view of the camera. Then the video stopped. Nick let out a laugh. “Oh my god guys, that’s amazing.” He looked up at them all. “And it worked? People are sharing that video instead?”

“Looks like it!” Tao was scrolling through his phone. “So many comments all calling Ben out for his behaviour. Nobody is sharing the video of your accident.”

Nick couldn’t believe it. He felt so much lighter. “Can you thank the lads for me? I don’t have my phone.” Charlie’s gave him a hug, “course we will. Now let’s share these chocolates out and we can catch you up on what you’ve missed at school…”

Nicks friends stayed for half an hour before Nick visibly tired and they left him to it. He slept soundly that night, the relief of the video being taken down along with not feeling sick any more meant he got a good sleep. The next morning the doctor gave him the all clear to go home.

“You’ll need to rest up for a while. No school next week and when you do go back take it easy. Your mum has all the details of follow up appointments you will need.” Sarah nodded, stuffing the information into her handbag.

“Thank you,” Nick was,so grateful to the doctors for fixing him up and being so kind. He was dressed in shorts because of his cast and a hoodie. He grabbed the crutches next to him and gingerly hauled himself up off the bed. His leg throbbed at the movement. This was not going to be easy. “Slow and steady Nick,” Sarah warned as she gathered up his bags and untied the balloon. Nick nodded. He carefully manoeuvred himself out of the room and into the corridor. “Um, where do we go?” He looked sheepishly at Sarah who chuckled, “ oh of course you won’t remember!” She pointed towards the lift and they slowly made their way to the car park. Nick collapsed into the passenger seat. Sarah had put the seat as far back as it could go to give him room for his leg. The walk had really taken it out of him and he had a thin sheen of sweat on his forehead which he wiped with his T-shirt.

“You ok sweetheart?” Sarah was looking at him with concern. “Yeah, just wiped out. My head aches and my leg is throbbing like mad.” Sarah reached across and put her hand on his arm. “Let’s get you home and settled on the sofa. Then I’ll pop back out and get these prescriptions so you have some pain relief ok?”

“Yeah sounds good, thanks mum,” Nick closed his eyes against the harsh morning light and dozed as Sarah drove carefully home, avoiding as many pot holes as possible. When they arrived home he slowly made his way inside, immediately accosted by a giant ball of fluff. “Nellie, down!” Sarah tried to pull Nellie off Nick, not wanting her to injure him further. “It’s ok mum,” Nick grinned as he gently pushed Nellie down and scratched behind her ears. “I’ve missed her! Come on Nel, let’s get comfy on the sofa.” Sarah helped Nick to get settled, she raised his leg with a cushion and brought down a pillow and his duvet from his bed so he was cosy and warm. His crutches were placed within reach so he could use them if needed. Nellie, who couldn’t sit on his legs like usual, curled up in the tiny space at his feet.

“Cup of tea?” Sarah raised her eyebrows in question.

Nick smiled at her, it felt so good to be home. “Yes please. And a biscuit?” Sarah smiled back. “I’ll bring the whole packet,” she said, “ you’ve got a few days of not eating to make up for!” She went through to the kitchen before calling out, “oh I forgot to say, Charlie will be over soon, I texted him for you. I figured you’d want to see him.”

Nick grinned. “Thanks mum, you’re the best!” He settled back down against his pillow. A week of being pampered by his mum and Charlie was on his way over. He was feeling so much better already.

Chapter Text

Where had he put it? Nick scanned his room, how could he possibly have lost his sleeping bag? He’d checked in his wardrobe, under his bed, it was literally nowhere. He sighed, admitting defeat and yelled down to his mum.

“Mum? Where’s my sleeping bag? I need to take it to Charlie’s!” He heard his mums exasperated sigh. “Nicky, I already told you it’s by the front door. You left it in the utility room after the last sleepover….honestly Nick try to pay attention!”

Oh yeah, Nick remembered that now, “sorry mum,” he called down sheepishly.

He sat down on his bed and went through his bag, checking he had everything. Clothes, phone charger, toiletries, snacks to share. He zipped it up. He was so looking forward to this evening. The Paris squad hadn’t had a sleepover all together in ages. He grabbed his bag and stood up quickly, the blood rushed to his head and he immediately sat back down, feeling woozy and slightly sick. That was weird. He stood up more slowly. His head felt a little off but nothing too bad. Maybe he’d grab some painkillers before he left, just in case.

Nick rushed down the stairs into the kitchen where Sarah was sitting at the table scrolling through her iPad. “Ready to go baby?” She smiled at Nick. Her smile faltering slightly as she saw him rummaging in the medicine cupboard. “Everything ok?” She studied his face. He looked ok, maybe a little paler than usual.

“Yeah I’m fine,”Nick reassured her, “just a bit of a funny head so I figured I’d take something to get rid of it before I go.” He finally located the liquid paracetamol and poured himself 4 teaspoons. Sarah stifled her laugh. He was such a baby with tablets but he really was too old for Calpol. “Hey, don’t mock me!” Nick fake pouted. He knew it was ridiculous but he loved the taste of it and he didn’t see why he’d force two horrible dry tablets down his throat if he didn’t have to. He tossed the spoon into the sink and started to put on his shoes. “Want a lift?” Sarah raised her eyebrows in question. “Nah, I’m fine to walk. It’s a nice day.” He gave her a hug and a kiss, grabbed his bag and sleeping bag and headed for the door. “See you in the morning!”

“Have fun darling, behave yourself!” Nick chuckled as he closed the door behind him. She always said exactly the same thing, have fun but behave. He squinted a little at the brightness, his vision swimming slightly, his stomach swooping. He reached into his bag and put his sunglasses on. He sent a quick text to Charlie to let him know he was on his way, receiving a heart emoji in return. He smiled and pocketed his phone.

Nick rang the bell and was instantly pulled into the house by Charlie. “Help me set up! Everyone will be here soon.” He tried to drag Nick into the lounge but Nick pulled him back for a hug. Charlie chuckled. “Nick, we don’t have time! The lounge is a mess!”

“There’s always time for a cuddle Charlie,” Nick stated. He mock glared until Charlie relented and Nick snuggled into his shoulder. He felt Charlie relaxing next to him. “Char, our friends don’t need anything setting up. They’ve come for a sleepover, not to inspect your house!” Charlie sighed, “I know, I just want everything to be perfect.”

Nick pulled back from the hug just enough to plant a kiss on Charlie’s lips. “It will be perfect babe, because it’s all our favourite friends together having fun.” Charlie knew Nick was right, but one of the ocd symptoms he really struggled with was the idea that he had to have everything planned out and prepared. That if he didn’t plan properly everything would go wrong.

Sensing his dilemma, Nick took his hand and led him into the lounge. “Come on then! Put me to work until they all get here.” Charlie gave him a soft smile. He loved that boy so much.

Working together they had the lounge tidy and the snacks set up on the table just in time for their friends to arrive. Nick wiped the sweat from his forehead and sat down on the sofa while Charlie busied himself letting everyone in. He felt weird. His stomach was flip flopping and his head still hurt. Surely he wasn’t getting poorly? Ignoring his symptoms, Nick pulled himself up from the sofa and joined in all the various group hugs and greetings. No, he was fine, just a bit tired and probably hungry. He hadn’t eaten that much for lunch after all. He grabbed a handful of crisps from the table and stuffed them into his mouth.

“Oy, rugby lad save some for the rest of us,” Tao teased. Nick grinned at him, his mouth still full of crisps. He swallowed them down. His stomach still felt funny but he was sure it would settle soon.

“Shall we order pizza?” Tara had her phone on and was scrolling through different delivery apps looking for a good deal.

“Oh my god yes please,” Darcy sighed dramatically. “I’m starving!” The next few moments were spent with everyone adding their requests to the order. Nick was so proud when Charlie ordered himself a small pizza. He listened to everyone until Tara turned to him. “What about you Nick?” The thought of pizza didn’t actually sound too appealing but he wasn’t going to cause a fuss and request something different. “I’ll have a ham and pineapple thanks Tara.”

“Yuck! Pineapple on pizza is homophobic,” declared Darcy. Everyone laughed and Nick threw a crisp at her. “Leave me and my Hawaiian pizza alone!” He grinned.

Everyone got their pizza deliveries in and Tara and Elle called them in. Charlie put more snacks out and made another jug of iced tea for his friends.  Tori was upstairs but she would be going out with Michael later and his parents were away for the evening, hence why he was throwing the sleepover in the first place. They hadn’t had one in the longest time so it made sense.  Charlie placed the jug down on the living room table. He glanced over at his boyfriend, who was unusually quiet. Something didn’t seem quite right, although he couldn’t put his finger on it. “Nick?? You okay?”

Nick felt warm. He usually ran hot anyway, but this was a different level, at first he thought that the heating was on but it was not like Jane Spring to waste good money in heating up the house, especially in August, when the temperature was so nice outside. His head had a dull ache in it and his stomach was cramping. Eating those crisps definitely wasn’t a good idea. He didn’t feel good. No! This couldn’t be happening. He couldn’t be ill, not in front of his friends.

“Nick?? You okay?”

Nick suddenly snapped out of his train of thoughts in hearing Charlie’s concerned voice.   “Yeah…yeah I’m Ok..” he forced out a smile. He wished the sicky feeling would disappear.  Charlie wasn’t fully convinced and sat next to Nick.  “You sure you’re feeling alright?” He asked in genuine concern. Nick wasn’t behaving like his normal self, he had noticed.  “I feel fine.” Nick quickly replied. It was a lie, but he wasn’t about to ruin their sleepover by announcing he was feeling poorly. It would be completely selfish to make the night all about himself.  Everyone had been looking so forward to tonight. He couldn’t just spoil it.  “Are you sure?” Charlie pushed. “You look pale..”  “I’m always pale, Char…” Nick rolled his eyes, trying to diffuse Charlie’s niggling suspicions.   “Paler than usual.” Charlie pointed out, studying his boyfriend’s face properly.  Nicks face was chalk white, his eyes were glassy and there was beads of sweat on his forehead. He didn’t look well.  Nick was about to protest when the doorbell rang.  “Pizzas here!!” Nick announced, pulling himself on to his feet and completely changing the subject.  Charlie watched Nick walk towards the door with Darcy and Tara. He wasn’t convinced.

The floor was soon decorated in pizza boxes and bags of chips as everyone hungrily dug in, everyone that was apart from Nick who picked a few pieces of pineapple off his pizza. The cramps in his stomach had intensified. Why was the room so hot? He could feel his palms sweating as the contents of his stomach threatened to make a re-appearance. He could feel Charlie’s eyes on him as he pulled his pizza apart but didn’t make much effort to actually put any in his mouth.  Nick was panicking now. This couldn’t happen. He couldn’t get sick in front of his friends. That would be far too humiliating. He would never live it down.  He didn’t feel as if he had much choice right now. His stomach felt like a washing machine swishing and churning away. The pain in his head was thumping. He felt dizzy, like he had to lie down, but the feeling of sickness continue to climb up his throat. He was going to be sick, whether he liked it or not and he had to act, fast.  He pushed his barely touched pizza box to the side and quickly pulled himself to his feet. He could feel the questioning eyes from his friends on him.  “Just need the loo.” He lied as he quickly walked out the room, he picked up his pace as he approached the stairs. He felt a sour taste in his mouth and knew he had to get in front of a toilet.  Now! He took the stairs two at a time as he thundered up them, not really caring right now that he was probably making a scene as the only thing that mattered was not projectile vomiting all over Jane Springs carpet.   Nick made it in to the bathroom as he quickly shut the door behind him, but not locking it. He fell on to his knees in front of the toilet, just in time as a fountain of vomit made its way out of his mouth and in to the toilet. He coughed and gagged as more stomach bile poured out. He wrapped a clammy hand around his tummy as it ached. He felt tears spring to his eyes as he got sick and felt them roll down his cheeks.  Nicholas Nelson hated being sick. His throat burned as he threw up again and again. His body was overrun with violent shakes.  He couldn’t believe this was happening.  How on earth was he supposed to disguise this?   He wasn’t sick. He refused to believe it. His stomach had just disagreed with the handful of crisps he had eaten earlier and the few pieces of pineapple that he had torn off his pizza.  Yes. That was it.   Nick let his stomach empty itself. When he was sure he wasn’t going to be sick again, he shakily pulled himself to his feet and flushed the toilet. He swayed a little, unsteady on his feet as he gripped on to the sink for support. He caught a glance of himself in the mirror. His face was paler than before and tear stained. His eyes were glassed over with fever. He splashed his face with water before reaching out for the toothbrush of his that he kept at Charlie’s. He squirted a generous amount of toothpaste and began cleaning his teeth, trying to rid of the vomit taste in his mouth.   The cramping in his stomach was still there, if anything, the pain felt worse. He felt hot and clammy but his body was full of shivers and shakes.  He finished brushing his teeth, rinsing the toothbrush and placing it back in the holder before drying his hands and opening the bathroom door.  Surely he hadn’t been gone for too long? He didn’t want his friends to suspect something was wrong.  He tiptoed back down the face, about to play it as normal when he heard Charlie’s voice from the living room.  “Nick? You okay?”

“Yeah I’m coming,” he called down the stairs. Taking a deep breath he grabbed the bannister and made his way down. The room was spinning a bit and his head was banging. But his stomach felt a little better. Hopefully he’d got it all out and it was just a one time vomit and done. He walked into the living room. Tara and Darcy were squeezed into an armchair together, looking at something on Tara’s phone and giggling to each other. Elle and Tao were gathering up the pizza boxes. They didn’t notice him slip back into the room. Charlie did though. Nick could feel his eyes on him as he came and sat down on the sofa next to him. “You ok?” Charlie was staring at Nick intensely. He looked pale and clammy and his eyes were red like he’d been crying. He watched as Nick looked down at his feet before mumbling, “yeah I’m fine Char.” He plastered on a reassuring smile, but Charlie wasn’t convinced. “Are you feeling ok?” Nick looked him in the eye, “I’m fine, I promise. Sorry if I was a bit long up there….”he looked away sheepishly. Charlie decided he wasn’t going to push it, but he was going to keep a close eye on his boyfriend.

Tao broke the silence, “Right, it’s film time! Let’s get the snacks sorted and I’ll put the film on.” Darcy groaned, “Tao, please can we watch something fun?? I can’t cope with another artsy movie…” Tao glared at her. Elle put her hand on his arm soothingly. “Why don’t we let Charlie choose the movie as it’s his house.” Tao sighed and nodded his head. He knew it wasn’t his turn to choose the movie, he just had so many good ideas for films they could all watch and discuss together.

Charlie and Tao started scrolling through the different movie choices they could find on Netflix and Prime. Nick was sat leaning back on the sofa with his eyes closed. The churning feeling in his stomach was back and he was fairly certain he was about to throw up again. No! Surely not already it had only been about ten  minutes since last time. He tried to slow his breathing, mouth closed, but he could feel the dreaded feeling of his stomach contents making their way upwards. He quietly slipped from the room while everyone was distracted choosing the movie and gathering snacks. He raced up the stairs, into the bathroom, remembering to lock the door this time. He made it just in time, lifted the toilet seat and gagged and retched as what little was left in his stomach made a reappearance. He coughed and choked as the vomit sprayed into the toilet. Tears poured down his cheeks.  Being sick was just the worst. He collapsed back onto his knees and rested his head in his hands which were gripping the bowl. He felt so horrible, the room was spinning with dark spots filling his vision. He slowly willed his body to calm down. He flushed the toilet and brushed his teeth again. One glance in the mirror and he winced at what he saw. He was going to struggle to hide this from Charlie. He splashed some water on his face and then opened the bathroom door.

“You’re sick.”

Nick jumped out of his skin at the sight of Tori stood outside the bathroom, her usual drink in hand and a disapproving look on her face. “Shit, Tori I didn’t see you there. I’m not sick,” Nick took a step back, wobbling slightly as the dizziness overtook him.

“I heard you in the bathroom,” Tori continued to stare into his soul. nick sighed. There was no point denying it if she’d overheard him.

“Oh,” he wasn’t sure what else to say. The sick feeling in his stomach hadn’t gone away and he actually felt close to passing out, the black spots in his vision increasing.

“I’m going to get Charlie,” Tori turned and marched down the stairs not leaving him anytime to protest that he really didn’t want to ruin the sleepover.

Tori walked into the lounge, where Tao and Charlie were still arguing over which movie to put on. “Charlie.” Charlie whirled round at the sound of his sister. Tao jumped, “God we need to put a bell on you.” Charlie smirked,  “how do you always manage to sneak up on me!” He looked over at Tori and the smile on his face faltered. She looked worried about something. “Everything ok?” Tori nodded towards the stairs and Charlie followed her. “You choose a movie Tao, I’ll be back in a minute.” Tao whooped in triumph and grabbed the remote. Charlie followed his sister into the hallway, “what’s wrong?”

“Nick is sick,” Tori stated. She waved her hands in the direction of the upstairs bathroom. “I overheard him throwing up. A lot.” Charlie was up the stairs in an instant, taking them two at a time and his heart broke as he saw Nick slumped on the floor in the hallway. He was sitting with his back against the wall, his knees tucked up to his chest. His head was buried in his hands. He gently placed a hand on his shoulder. “Nick?” Nick slowly looked up. He looked awful. His face had a green tinge to it and was covered in a thin sheen of sweat. His eyes were bloodshot and he looked to be shivering. “Oh baby, why didn’t you say something?”

“I didn’t want to ruin the sleepover…”Nick mumbled, resting his head back down. The room really needed to stop spinning. Charlie rubbed his arm gently. “Nick you idiot, you can’t help feeling poorly. Do you still feel sick?” Nick nodded into his hands. He actually felt like he was about to be sick again but he didn’t have the energy to move. Charlie grabbed his arm. Let’s get you back into the bathroom just in case. Tori, grab my phone will you, I’m going to ring his mum and get her to come and collect him.”Nick didn’t have it in him to argue, he really did just want his mum. Charlie helped him to his feet and gently lowered him down by the toilet, just in time for him to start heaving once more. His stomach was pretty empty but it didn’t stop him retching and choking bile into the toilet. He felt so disgusting. Charlie was stroking his back and muttering reassuring words. How could he stand to be so close to him while he threw up? “I’m so sorry,” he managed to get out once he had finished being sick. Charlie stroked his back gently. “Please don’t tell me you are apologising for throwing up!” Nick nodded slowly, his ears were ringing and the room was spinning so much. He tried to stand  up quickly to wash his face and the world tilted on its axis and everything went black.

Charlie caught Nick as he collapsed back to the floor. Shit. He had passed out? “Tori!” He yelled down the stairs. “Come quick!”

Tori was in the lounge retrieving Charlie’s phone. The noise alerted the rest of the squad who stopped what they were doing and stared as she quickly left the room. “What’s going on?” asked Darcy. “Where are Nick and Charlie?”

Charlie shook Nicks shoulder. “Nick? Wake up baby?” Nick groaned. What had happened? Why was he lying on Charlie’s bathroom floor? The room was spinning less, he liked the cool feeling of the tiles on his face. He squeezed his eyes open and looked up at Charlie’s worried face. “Oh thank god,” Charlie let out a relieved breath. “You are awake. You passed out babe.”

Huh. That explained why he was on the floor. He moaned in response and closed his eyes. It was far too bright.

Tori appeared at the door and took in the sight in front of her, “what happened?” She handed the phone to Charlie, who scrolled to his contacts and dialled Sarah’s number. “He passed out for a minute.” Tori’s eyes widened. That wasn’t good. She crouched down to Nick and examined his face. He really looked poorly.

Charlie cleared his throat as he waited for Sarah to answer. He didn’t want to scare her but he really needed her to come quickly.

Sarah finally answered, he could hear music in the background. Shit, had she gone out? “Hi Charlie darling, everything ok?” Sarah was talking loudly to be heard over the music.

“Um, sorry to phone. But nicks not very well?” He heard Sarah moving to somewhere quieter. “Oh! What’s wrong with him? He had a headache earlier.”

“Well, he’s been really sick, like a lot. And he sorta, kinda passed out in the bathroom just now?”

WHAT? Oh my goodness. Charlie is he awake now? Can you put him on?”

Charlie held the phone out to Nicks ear. “It’s your mum baby,” Nick opened his eyes, which were filled with tears. “Mum? “ his voice cracked. “I don’t feel very well.”

“Oh my darling, just sit tight and I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“K,” nick sniffed, closing his eyes and leaning into the cool tiles once more. Charlie put the phone back to his ear. “He’s really not very well Sarah,”

“ok Charlie, I’m on my way,” he could hear Sarah moving about, “but I’m out with friends at the pub. It’s going to take me about an hour to get there. Try and keep him calm for me?”

Charlie’s heart sank, but he knew it wasn’t Sarah’s fault for having an evening out. “Ok, we will, see you soon.” He put the phone down and looked at Tori. “She’s an hour away,” he whispered, not wanting to panic Nick.

Toris heart sank. She was really quite fond of Nick and she didn’t like seeing him so unwell. “ let’s get him into your bed, he can’t stay on the floor for an hour.” Charlie and Tori tried to haul him up off the floor. They managed to get him to a sitting position but he was just too heavy for Tori to be much help. “Nick, can you help us get you up?” Nick nodded slowly and tried to pull himself up but the dizziness overtook him again. “Sorry…” he mumbled.

“What’s going on?” Isaac’s worried face appeared in the doorway. “What’s up with Nick?” Nick groaned. He didn’t want everyone looking at him while he was slumped on the bathroom floor. It was humiliating. Charlie sensed his embarrassment and rubbed his back reassuringly. “It’s just Isaac,” he whispered. “Can he help us get you into bed?” He nodded slowly. Being in bed would be a lot nicer.

“Nicks not well, he’s been throwing up and he just passed out. Can you help us move him to my room? His mums on her way but she’ll be a little while.” Isaac gasped. Poor Nick, he’d noticed he was quiet and not eating much earlier. He should have checked in with him. “Yeah course,” he replied bending down to help Charlie. Between them they managed to haul Nick up to his feet and helped him to slowly make his way into Charlie’s room. Tori followed, holding a bucket she’d found in the cupboard. Just in case Nick was sick again. Nick collapsed into the bed and laid on his side, shivering. He felt so rubbish. Both hot and cold, his head was pounding, his stomach still cramping. “Is my mum on her way?” He said through gritted teeth. Charlie stroked his damp sweaty hair. “She’s coming. Just try to relax.” Nick closed his eyes. He just wanted to go home. Tori lowered the lights and went to get a glass of water for Nick. She sent a text to Michael to let him know she would be late. She couldn’t leave Charlie to deal with this by himself.

Charlie looked out into the hallway where he could see his friends nervously hovering at the doorway.

“Is Nick okay?” Tara was the first to speak,  a worried expression painted across her face.   “I’ll be right back, Nick.” Charlie soothed as he brushed his hand through Nick’s sweaty, damp hair. He hissed as he touched Nick’s warm skin. He glanced at his sister, who was wearing the same concerned look as him.  “I think he’s running a temperature.” Charlie muttered as he placed the palm of his head against Nick’s forehead, just to be sure. Yes, definitely a fever.  “I’ll fetch a cool washcloth.” Charlie said as he moved away from the bed, coming face to face with his friends who were all eagerly waiting to find out what was happening. It was clear to them that Nick was poorly. He didn’t look well at all.  They all shared the same guilty feeling. Nick had seemed out of sorts all evening, but nobody had acted on it.   “He’s ill, isn’t he?” Elle asked quietly, as her gaze shifted between Charlie and Nick who was curled up on his side on the bed, his hand was firmly clamped around his stomach, his eyes squeezed tightly shut, as he breathed in an out in an attempt not to get sick again.   

Charlie nodded.  “I think he’s caught that sickness bug that was going around Truham last week.” He told them as he recalled that there had been at least 3 absent seats in their form class this week, due to illness.   Imogen, who had disappeared returned, holding a damp cool cloth after Tori had instructed her on where to find the wash cloths. She had soaked it in cold water from the bathroom and had rung out the excess water. She made her way over to the bed sitting down.  “Sorry, Nick.” She apologised as she placed the cool rag on Nick’s forehead.  “This might be a little cold.”   Nick let a little moan escape his lips as the coldness had been a shock to the system, he squinted his eye open to see Imogen hovering over him before he quickly realised how soothing the cloth was against his feverish skin. “Feels Nice…” he breathed out, tiredly.   He felt absolutely humiliated.  He wasn’t used to being the one that needed taken care of. He was used to being the one to take care of other people.  Oh, how the tables had turned.

Tori returned back in to the room holding a glass of water and a little ear thermometer that she had dug out of the bathroom cabinet. She handed it over to Charlie. “Sarah will probably want to know if he’s running a temperature or not…” she said as she glanced at Nick, taking in his appearance once more, his red, flushed cheeks and the beds of sweat his forehead were a certain giveaway that he was.  She sat the glass of water on the side.  “Do you have a hot water bottle Charlie?” Tara asked, noticing how tightly Nick was holding his stomach.  “Is your stomach hurting?” She asked softly.  It wasn’t nice seeing Nick like this. He was usually the one that held everyone else together, like the glue of the group,  but right now he just looked so poorly. Nick gave a little nod of the head, not bothering to open his eyes, his face crumpled in pain in discomfort.    “I think mums got one stuffed away in the utility closet.” Tori replied as she lead Tara out of the room.   Issac, Darcy, Elle, Tao, Sahar and Imogen moved back in to the hallway as much as they wanted to be there for Nick, they had all agreed that if it was them that was feeling poorly, the last thing they’d want was everyone gawping at them.  Poor Nick, he didn’t look well at all.   

Charlie dabbed away at Nick’s forehead and then down his neck with the wet cloth before placing it on the side and picking up the thermometer that Tori had brought.  “Can I take your temperature , baby?” He soothed as he smoothed out Nick’s fringe. Nick failed to open his eyes again as he felt like the room was still spinning, even with them closed. He just felt so poorly. He nodded his head a little in consent though as Charlie placed the tip of the thermometer in his ear and waited for the little beep.  The device confirmed what he already knew. “Definitely a fever.” He mouthed to Tori as she re-entered the room with the hot water bottle. Nick wasted no time in hugging it to his aching stomach. Tara hung back in the hallway with the others. Not wanting to overwhelm Nick when he was already feeling so rotten.   

Nick felt poorly, exhausted, achy. He just felt rubbish. He was so tired, but he didn’t want to sleep. He wanted his mum.   “Is mum here?” He mumbled softly.  Charlie stroked his cheek with him thumb. “She’s on her way, I promise..” he soothed. His heart breaking for his boyfriend. He knew that when he was poorly, all he wanted was his mum, too.  Jane Spring wasn’t nearly  as motherly as Sarah Nelson but she always took good care of him and Tori when they were under the weather.

Sarah Nelson drove as quickly as she legally could from the pub that was located way on the other side of town. She was so thankful that she had taken her car with her this evening. She had been in two minds whether she should have or not.  She had originally planned on sharing a taxi with one of her friends which would have allowed her to have a glass of wine but she had felt a niggle in the back of her mind earlier that evening telling her just to take the car. She was so glad she did as she had wasted no time in excusing herself from her group of friends and jumping back in her car as soon as Charlie had called. She should have acted on her motherly instincts earlier when Nick had mentioned his poorly head. He had looked a little peaky and out of sorts, but she hadn’t wanted to spoil is evening, but he had evidently not been completely truthful with her.  She was so glad that she hadn’t touched a drop of alcohol as she remembered back to the last time Nick had come down with a vomiting bug a few years ago. She had spent the entire night up with him as he had threw up. She had a feeling this evening was going to go the same way.  She just had to get there. She knew how much of a Mummy’s boy Nicky was when he wasn’t feeling well,  more so than usual.  She pulled on to Charlie’s street wondering what state of her son was awaiting for her.

Tara and Darcy were keeping watch out of the lounge window for Sarah. Everyone felt so helpless. It was horrible seeing Nick feeling so poorly. They saw her car pulling up onto the street outside. “She’s here,” yelled Darcy as they both raced to the door and opened it before Sarah had even managed to get out of the car.

“Hi girls,” Sarah rushed inside and closed the door behind her. “How’s he doing?”

Tara and Darcy exchanged a look, “Um, he’s upstairs in Charlie’s room. He’s really not very well. We have been trying to stay out the way a bit so we didn’t overwhelm him. It’s horrible seeing him feel so poorly.” Sarah squeezed Tara’s arm reassuringly as she passed her and began climbing the stairs quickly. She didn’t know her way around the Spring’s house but it wasn’t hard to work out where Nick was. Tao and Elle were stood outside one of the bedrooms peering through to the darkened room inside. “Hi Mrs Nelson,” Elle came forward and gave her a hug. “Sarah, please!” She insisted. “Thanks for looking after him for me.”

“Oh we really haven’t done much, it’s been Charlie and Tori.” Sarah gave her a smile. “Well I’ll get him home now and you can get back to enjoying your sleepover.” She took a deep breath and walked into Charlie’s room. The sight in front of her warmed her heart. Charlie was sitting beside Nick, a cool compress in his hand which he was dabbing on Nicks forehead. Tori was talking to Nick, trying to distract him from how poorly he was feeling. She took in Nick’s appearance. He looked really poorly. A greyish green colour but also flushed with a fever. His eyes were closed and his breathing was shallow. He was clutching a hot water bottle to his tummy.  Both their heads turned as they noticed her arrival. “Oh thank god!” Charlie breathed a sigh of relief. “Nick, your mums here!” Nicks eyes opened and he scanned the room for his mum, his eyes filling with tears as he saw her coming towards him, her arms outstretched. “Mum!” He let her pull him into her arms for a cathartic hug, tears spilling down his cheeks. “I don’t feel very well.”

Sarah rubbed his back soothingly, “ I know darling, let’s get you home.” Charlie and Tori took a step back. They were so relieved to see Sarah. It was good to have an adult to take control of the situation. “He has a temperature, “ Tori stated. “It’s 39.2”

Sarah grimaced. That was far too warm. “Thank you so much for looking after him both of you. I’ll get him home now.”

“I hope he’s ok,” Charlie whispered. He felt exhausted from the adrenaline of seeing Nick pass out in front of him. Sarah gave him a smile. “I’m sure he’ll be fine, it must have been scary to see him fainting though.” Charlie gave a small nod. He never wanted to see that again in his life.

“Right my darling,” Sarah turned to Nick, “let’s get you in the car. Do you think you are going to be sick again?”

“He hasn’t thrown up since he passed out about an hour ago,” Tori told her. “But you can borrow this bucket if you want?” Sarah nodded in appreciation. “Ok darling up you come.” She helped Nick to sit up. The world was still spinning and his head was really sore. “I’m so dizzy,” he mumbled.

“Me and Isaac managed to get him in here, shall we help you get him downstairs?” Sarah smiled, “yes please. And maybe ask his friends to wait in the lounge? I know Nicky and he’ll hate to have everyone fussing over him.”

Tori immediately left the room and took charge. Gathering all the squad in the lounge and closing the door, leaving Isaac and Charlie to help Nick slowly down the stairs. They had to stop a few times as his dizziness took hold but eventually they got him laying down in the backseat of the car, the bucket squeezed into the footwell by his head. Charlie gave him a small kiss on his sweaty forehead. “I’ll message you in the morning ok?” Nick gave a tiny nod. “I’m sorry for spoiling the sleepover,” he groaned. “I shouldn’t have come.”

“Hey, none of that.” Charlie was firm. “You couldn’t have known you were going to be this poorly. Just go home and rest ok?” Nick nodded. Sarah gave Charlie a hug, “thank you darling, we’ll be ok from here. I’ll get him to message you when he’s feeling better.”

“Ok, thanks Sarah.” They watched as she got in the car and drove away before going back indoors. Isaac opened the lounge door and they were immediately faced with their friends worried faces.

“Poor Nick,” said Sahar sympathetically, “being sick is the worst.”

“Yeah,” Darcy agreed. One time I was sick and it came out my nose. It was so disgusting!”

“Eww Darcy!” Exclaimed Tara, “Too much information!” The group chuckled.

“So I guess we should watch a movie then?” Tao looked around at everyone, nobody was really in the mood for a fun sleepover anymore but it was too late to go home and Nick would be mortified if they cancelled because of him.

“Yeah I guess so,” Charlie looked at the others who nodded in agreement. They settled down to watch the film, though Charlie’s mind kept wandering to Nick. Had they got home ok? Was he still being sick? It was going to be a long night, waiting to hear that his boyfriend was back to his normal self.

Sarah managed to coax Nick out of the car, with the promise of his bed and pyjamas. She helped him up the stairs and into the bathroom, where he brushed his teeth and splashed his face with cold water. He slowly walked into his room and crawled under the covers. Sarah returned from the kitchen with a cold compress. “Sleep now baby,” she cooed. “You’ll feel better in the morning.” Nicks sighed with relief at the cool compress. He felt better now that he was home in his own bed and his mum was looking after him. “Ok,” he grumbled. “Will you stay with me?” He sounded so young it pulled at her heart strings. “Of course I will baby. You just sleep. I’ll be here if you need me.” She stroked his hair as he finally let go and fell into a deep sleep. He was completely exhausted.

Sarah kept watch over him all night, as she had done every time he was poorly as a youngster. Eventually, when she was sure he wasn’t going to wake up, she allowed herself to fall asleep next to him. When Nick woke up the next morning, his head was less sore, his stomach had calmed down. He was still exhausted and he knew he needed a duvet day but he felt a lot better. He turned his head to see Nellie curled up beside him. His mum was nowhere to be seen. Before he could wonder where she was, she opened his door, a tray in her hand with water, calpol and some dry toast.

“Morning darling, how are you feeling?” Nicks sat up in bed. His tummy still hurt but he was willing to try some toast. “A lot better than last night. Im sorry for ruining your evening.” He looked down at his fingernails. She never went out and the one time she did he had made her come home.

“Don’t be ridiculous. I will always come home if you need me. I can catch up with the girls another time.” She forced him to look up at her. “I’m glad you feel better, eat this toast then you can have some calpol and text Charlie. He’s been so worried about you.” Nick groaned as he thought about how his friends had all seen him so sick. Sarah stopped his negative spiral before it could begin “your friends were all worried about you too. They will be so happy you are feeling better.” Nicks gave her a small smile.

“Yeah I know. It’s just embarrassing.” He felt his cheeks flush as he remembered the events of last night. “I passed out on his bathroom floor didn’t I?” He groaned.

Sarah chuckled, “yeah you did. So please text him and put him out of his misery!” Nicks gave her a grin. “Give me the toast then!”

“Tell you what, why don’t you invite everyone here next weekend to make up for it? We’ve nothing planned.”

Nick smiled at her, his mum really was the best. “Thanks mum,” she gave him a hug and left him to his toast, phone in hand already texting Charlie with the news of his survival and suggestion of a sleepover at his house next week. He really was lucky to be surrounded by so many people who loved and cared for him. He sank back into his pillow and smiled.

Chapter Text

TW://

Homophobic assault, Homophobic language, Violence, hospitals, swearing, mentions of surgery, mentions of blood.

Nick shivered slightly as they stepped outside of the arcade in to the cold winter night.  “Fancy sharing a bag of chips on the way back to the bus stop?”  He suggested as he zipped up his hoodie, watching as Charlie did the same, mirroring his actions as he buttoned up his duffel coat.  They have had the most wonderful afternoon and evening.  Starting off by lunch at Nando’s.  Charlie wasn’t a massive man of the cuisine but he had agreed as it was Nick’s turn to choose  where they eat for their monthly date night.  He was a big fan of the spicy rice from there, so he had been happy enough with that.  After lunch, followed a movie at the cinema and then they had just spent the last couple of hours challenging each other to rounds of Air Hockey and Mario Kart in the arcade. It definitely was the perfect date.  

“Sounds good.” Charlie grinned as he took hold of his boyfriend’s hand.  “On one condition though..” he handed.  Nick glanced down to Charlie with a smirk, raising his eyebrow.  “Oh yeah? What’s that??” He questioned.  “You don’t completely drown them in vinegar like you normal do..” he ruffled his nose up in disgust.  “I do not!” Nick argued playfully as he rolled his eyes.  “You so do!” Charlie replied.  “You’re not satisfied until there’s a literal puddle of vinegar in the chip box.” He laughed as they crossed the road toward the fish and chip shop on the corner.  Nick ordered a regular portion of chips and of course a chip-shop pickle for himself much to Charlie’s horror.  “You are disgusting!”     “Chip shop pickles are the best…” Nick argued.  “No! Pickles in general are just gross.” Charlie replied as he pulled the repulsed face.  Nick gasped as he put his hand on his chest.  “How dare you!!” He joked humourously as the cashier handed him over their order and two forks as requested.   

They decided to take the long route towards the bus stop, which would give them roughly about 10 minutes to eat their chips and engage in chatful conversations.   “See!” Charlie chuckled as he put a chip in his mouth. “So much better without being completely doused in vinegar.”     Nick just rolled his eyes as he popped a Chip in his own mouth.   He was suddenly aware of loud laughter. He looked over his shoulder to see a group of 4 older lads. They looked more David’s age, if not older.  They werent that far behind them and for some reason Nick felt an unnerving chill go down his spine.  He didn’t know why. They hadn’t done anything to them but then he heard it.

“Oi! Fairies!!” 

Nick tensed as he instinctively reached out and took Charlie’s hand in to his own. Holding it tightly.  Surely they weren’t addressing them? No. Surely not.  It was just a bunch of rowdy lads. They would soon over take them and be gone.  Boy, was he wrong.  

“Oi curls!!! It’s not polite to ignore people!”  The voices were getting closer. They were right behind them.  Charlie froze. Were they talking about him? He felt his body go rigid in fear.  What did they want? They hadn’t done anything to draw attention to themselves. He then paled as he glanced down to his and Nick’s entwined hand.  This was because they were together? This was because they were holding hands. He wasn’t doing anything wrong. He was holding his boyfriend hand.  “Just keep walking, Char…” Nick whispered as he began picking up his pace.  So did the lads behind them. One of them grabbed Charlie from behind, pulling him out of Nick’s hold.

  “Hey pretty boy. We’re taking to you..” he sneered.  He was dressed in dark colours, considerably talller than Charlie, a little taller than Nick. He had his hood up, his eyes were full of homophobic hate.  “You’re disgusting…you know that?” He seethed.  Charlie was paralysed in fear. This couldn’t be happening.  “Leave him alone.” Nick replied as he tried to reach out for Charlie’s hand again, he was held back by one of the other lads.  “Get off me.” Nick snapped, trying to wriggle out of his restraint.  He had to protect Charlie. Nothing else mattered right now.    

“Your boyfriend here is being very rude.” The ringleader of the gang replied as he circled Charlie, he could feel his fear. It filled him with joy. Charlie was scared. Petrified even. That was what he was aiming for.  He reached out and touched Charlie’s lips with his finger.  “Cat got your tongue, gay boy??” He jibed, sniggered as his mates chuckled and chanted, egging him on.

Don’t touch him!!” Nick spat, managing to pull himself out of the other boys grip. How dare they lay a finger on his Charlie.  He wouldn’t stand for it.  “Don’t you dare touch him!!” He snapped. He had no idea where this sudden confidence was coming from. He was absolutely bricking it but he wouldn’t let anything happen to Charlie.   One of the men laughed.  “Aw would you look at that. Faggot one is protecting Faggot two…”  Charlie shuddered as he heard the evil laughter erupt through the group.  They were enjoying this.   “L..Leave us alone!” He stuttered finally finding his voice. He was petrified. This felt like a nightmare. He wished it was a nightmare.    “Or what??” The leader spat venomously as he got closer to Charlie, so their faces were only inches apart.  “What you going to do about it poof?” He spat, his saliva splashing on to Charlie’s face.  Charlie could feel his body shaking in fear.  “I asked you a fucking question!” The man screamed in Charlie’s face as he yanked him by the hair and slammed him against a wall.  A cry of pain escaped Charlie’s mouth.   

“NO!” Nick screamed as he pulled the man away from Charlie.  “I said don’t fucking touch him!” He seethed as he forced the man to look at him before a full blown scuffle unfolded. The man threw a punch, which Nick managed to dodge and get in one of his own. He was managing to hold himself pretty well, that was until the other three lads jumped in. Nick was forced on to his knees and his arms were pulled behind his back as the gang leader kicked him hard in the stomach, completely knocking the wind out of him.   “NICK!!!” Charlie screamed horrified as Nick let out a strangled cry of pain but he managed to wriggle free again and pull himself to his face.  

Nick wasn’t one for admitting defeat but three to one was never a fair fight. He knew almost from the get go that he was outnumbered. Nick could handle himself. He could give a good fight, normally. He was usually fast on his feet. He had rugby to thank for that. But these men were older and stronger. He stood no chance.  He did fight back for a bit, but he was growing tired. He tried to give his best defence but he was outnumbered and he was growing weaker so his only option was to curl into a protective ball to try and shield himself from the oncoming blows as punch after punch and kick after kick rained down on his body. Charlie screamed as he tried to intervene. He tried to get to Nick, but he was held back by one of the guys. His arms were forcer behind his back as he was restrained. 

All charlie could do was watch on in horror as Nick was held down, kicked and punched repeatedly by 3 of the 4 men. He screamed and tried to wriggle out of the strong hold of his restrainer but it was no use. He was too strong.  “Leave him alone!” He screamed.  “You’re going to kill him!”    Why was nobody around? Why was nobody coming to help?  “”Your boyfriend here should have kept his mouth shut!!” The gang leader announced as he reached into his pocket and pulled out, brandishing a pocket knife. Charlie went stiff as he saw the silver reflection of the blade.  He was holding a knife! 

Nick could feel the world around him begin to fade away as he fought hard to keep his eyes open. His whole body was screaming in agony as punch after punch and kick after kick rained down on him. He could hear Charlie’s screams.  They better not be hurting him. He thought. He tried to fight back. It was no use. There was too many of them. He rolled on to his back and managed to pull himself into a sitting position despite the other lads trying to keep him down. He was using the last of his strength. He needed to get to Charlie

“Where do you think you’re going,” one of the men said as he watched Nick try to drag himself up and crawl towards where Charlie was. Nick couldn’t see anything, his left eye had completely swollen shut and there was blood dripping into his right one clouding his vision. He tried to crawl towards where he thought Charlie was, but was stopped by a heavy boot pressing down onto his back. “Oy, fairy..I said where do you think you are going?”

“Please, leave him alone, “Charlie sobbed. “Can’t you see he’s hurt?” Tears streamed down his face as he looked at Nick. His face was covered in blood that was dripping from a cut on his forehead. His breathing was laboured. Charlie could see the knife still glinting in the gang leaders hand as he kept his boot on Nick, completely immobilising  him. “What do you think lads? Has he learned his lesson yet?” He took his boot away from Nicks back and pulled him up into a kneeling position by yanking hard on his hair. Nick moaned in pain. The leader pulled his hair until Nicks head was facing up towards him. He knelt down and whispered in his ear, “ people like you make me sick.” He spat in his face, pulled the knife from behind his back and plunged it into Nicks chest. He howled in pain as the knife was pulled out and the man let go of him. He fell to the floor, clutching his chest as blood began to pour through his fingers from the wound splattering the pavement beneath him. Charlie screamed. 

“For fucks sake Tony, what the hell have you done?” The man holding Charlie yelled in anger. “We don’t fucking stab them. Jesus Christ. Lads let’s get out of here.” Charlie felt himself being released as the gang scattered. Instantly he was on his knees next to Nick who was lying motionless on the ground. His eyes were closed. A pool of blood was gathering underneath him. “Nick, baby can you hear me?” He looked around, they were still totally alone. “HELP!” He screamed, “someone help us!” Charlie fished his phone out of his pocket. With shaking hands he dialled 999. “Help, please help us,” he sobbed into the phone. He was breathing hard. “What emergency service do you require?” Came the voice on the other end. “Ambulance please, my boyfriend’s been attacked……they’ve stabbed him, there’s so much blood.” Charlie’ could feel himself hyperventilating.

“Sir, I need you to stay calm. What’s your location, I’m dispatching an ambulance immediately.” Charlie looked around desperately trying to work out where they were. He noticed a shop sign across the road. “Um, we are opposite Smiths Newsagent on Broad St.” there was a pause as the operator inputted the details. “Ok, ambulance will be there in 2 minutes. Now I need you to put pressure on the stab wound. We need to control the bleeding, can you do that?”  Charlie put the phone on the ground, on speaker mode and gently bent down to Nick. “Baby, I’m here, I’m going to move you  ok?” He gently pulled Nick onto his back. His heart shattered at the sight. Nicks face was covered in blood and blossoming bruises. His hoody was completely stained through with blood. Charlie took his hand and pressed onto the wound. Nick moaned underneath him and he let out a groan of pain. “I’m sorry baby,” Charlie sobbed. “I need to stop the bleeding. Try and stay awake for me? I love you so much.” He heard  the sound of sirens approaching and an ambulance and two police cars came screeching down the road towards him. Paramedics jumped out of the van and raced over to him. 

“Ok, we will take it from here,” one of the men gently pulled Charlie away and handed him to an approaching police officer. Charlie slumped onto the pavement near Nick. He couldn’t take his eyes off him. He was shaking and his breathing was laboured. He recognised he was having a panic attack. He felt a blanket being placed over his shoulders and the kind voice of the police officer. But all he could do was look at Nick.

The paramedics had ripped open his shirt and placed some sort of dressing over the wound. They were pressing hard onto it to try and stem the flow. One of them was trying to jostle Nick awake. “He’s lost a lot of blood, and I’m not happy about these head injuries.” He heard one of them say to the other, “ we need to get him in fast. Call St Marks and them we are on our way.” They strapped Nick onto the stretcher and immediately loaded him into the ambulance. Charlie could hear Nicks moans of pain, though he was barely conscious. “Can I go with him?” He looked pleadingly at the paramedics, “please. He’ll be so scared.”

The parademics looked at each other. “Fine, but we need to go now. Charlie climbed into the back of the ambulance and sat in the chair at the foot of the bed. One of the paramedics was busy inserting an Iv into Nicks arm. He had sensors attached to him and the monitors were beeping in alarm. “His heart rate is extremely low” he called out to the paramedic in the driving seat. “Let’s go.” Charlie heard the sirens as the ambulance raced speedily towards the hospital. Charlie looked on in shock. Nick had to be ok. He just had to. He couldn’t die. Not like this. He could hear himself pleading with Nick to wake up, open his eyes. To fight. 

Charlie sat in the back of the ambulance. Nick had slipped in to unconsciousness again as the paramedics attended to him in the back of the van.  Charlie couldn’t believe this had happened.  They had been the victims of an homophobic attack, he tried his best to give a realistic description of the men to the police who had arrived at the scene. His mind was just a blur. They had did this to Nick, his gaze fell on the bloodied, bruised face of his beautiful boyfriend. Those monsters had done this. They had laid in to him. Kicking and punching. They kicked him in the stomach, the face, stamped on his head, pulling his hair, spitting on him and then they had pulled out a knife. A knife!!!! They had stabbed him. He held on to Nick’s hoodie that the paramedics had removed in order to try and stem the bled from the stab wound. Charlie gripped on to it. It was saturated in blood. Nicks blood. He felt sick to him stomach as the ambulance sped down the road. Its sirens blaring as Nick was blue lighted to St Marks general hospital.  

The back doors to the ambulance swung open as the vehicle came to a halt outside the A&E department of the hospital. Nick was rushed inside. Charlie following closely behind, desperate not to let his Nick out of his sight. He needed to know what was going on. Nick was going to be okay. He had to be okay.   

“This is Nicholas Nelson! 17 year old male. Victim of a serious assault…” the paramedic explained to the doctor in charge as Nick was rushed in to a bay in resuscitation.  “He’s sustained serious trauma to the head and face as well as losing a lot of blood due to a stab wound to the chest. BP is 95/60…he is going to need a transfusion. He was conscious at the scene but he lost consciousness enroute.  IV line has been administered…” Charlie listened as the rambled on. He didn’t understand a word of his medical jargon.  A kind nurse put her arm around his shoulder and began leading him towards the door. He shook his head.  “Please!! I need to stay…” he begged as the tears poured down his face.  “I’m his boyfriend..” he cried.   “Come on, sweetheart..” the nurse soothed. “The doctors need space to help your boyfriend..”  she told him. “Let’s get your a nice cup of tea, eh?”   Tea?? Charlie didn’t want tea. He wanted Nick. He needed to be close to Nick. It was no use. He found himself being ushered into a small waiting room, nursing a paper cup of tea. He was all alone and he didn’t know what was going on. Was Nick okay? What was happening.  His eyes then went wide as he placed the cup on the table.  Sarah. Sarah had no idea what was going on. He felt his chest tightening as he fumbled in his pocket for his phone. His hand shook as he allocated her number in his phone before shakily pressing dial.   It rung a few times before he heard her voice on the other line. 

“Charlie??”  

“Sarah…” Charlie breathed out. He hadn’t realised until now how shaky his voice was. It wobbled as he breathed out heavily.  “Charlie? Are you okay darling?”  Charlie swallowed the lump in his throat. How on earth was he supposed to tell Sarah what had happened to her son. He needed to. She needed to know.  “It’s Nick…” Sarah went quiet but Charlie could hear her heavy breathing on the other end.  “What about Nick?” She asked. Charlie could hear the absolute panic in her voice.  “We…we were walking to the bus stop from the arcade…” he started as his voice wobbled.  “We…um…got chips…we were walking down Byer road towards broad street…these guys started following us..” Charlie explained.  “They started shouting homophobic abuse at us.” He told her as he closed his eyes remembering what had happened.  “They…they started laying in to Nick.” He cried.  “They were punching him and kicking him. He..he tried to fight back.” He cried.  “I…i tried to stop them but they held me away from him. There was too many of them..” he sobbed, his heart rate increasing and he started breathing really heavily. 

  “Charlie???  Breathe darling…” she soothed as she tried to calm him down. “Is Nick okay?” Sarah asked softly. Charlie felt tears roll down his cheek.  “Nick tried to crawl away from them…” he told her as his voice shook. “They…they pulled out a knife..”   He heard Sarah gasp on the other side of the phone, she let out a shaky breath.  “Charlie? Is Nick alright?” She repeated.  “They stabbed him in the chest…” Charlie cried out.  “They stabbed Nick…”

There was a silence on the other end of the phone. Then, “is he…..Charlie, is he alive?” Charlie’s voice shook as he replied. “Yes..but he lost so much blood Sarah, they took him away and I’m in this waiting room and I don’t know how he is doing.” He could feel himself hyperventilating again. 

“Which hospital?” Sarah’s voice was oddly calm. “Um, St Marks.” He could hear Sarah getting into her car. “I’m on my way. Hang in there Charlie.” She hung up before he could reply. Charlie put his phone down and cried. This was a nightmare. Was Nick still alive? He’d told Sarah he was but he had no idea. There was just so much blood. He glanced down at his phone as it vibrated. His mum had messaged asking him where he was as it was past curfew. He shakily picked it up and called her.

“Charlie, are you on your way home? It’s getting late!” Charlie tried to answer but his voice just closed up and all he could do was let out a sob. He heard his mum gasp. “Charlie? What’s wrong?”

“Something bad happened,” Charlie managed to stutter out. “On the way home. Some men attacked us.” He stopped, taking a deep breath.

“Attacked?” Jane screeched. “Are you hurt? Where are you Charlie, is Nick with you?” Charlie looked down at Nick’s bloodied hoodie, a strange feeling of guilt seeping through his bones as he spoke. “I’m not hurt, Nick tried to protect me…..” he heard Jane’s sigh of relief. “Ok, so where are you?” “Nick……Nick tried to stop them, they hurt him mum. Badly.”  “oh my goodness, is he ok? Where are you both?” Charlie took a shaky breath. He didn’t think he could relive it all again. “St Marks. It’s bad mum….they um….they beat him up so badly and then..” He dissolved back into sobs. Jane waited patiently on the end of the line for him to finish, “they stabbed him in the chest mum.” Jane felt an ice cold wave go through her entire body.

Stabbed? In the chest? She tried to keep her emotions in check. She needed to be calm for Charlie’s sake. “I’m coming right now sweetheart. I’ll be there in a few minutes. Just try to keep calm. Does Sarah know?” “Yes,” Charlie sniffed, “She is on her way. I’m so scared mum.” Charlie’s shoulders shook as he tried to keep his sobs under control. “I know you are, I’ll be there really soon. I love you.” Charlie put his phone down and glanced at the clock. It was half ten. He’d been in this room for 20 minutes and no news. Was that good? Surely they would have found him if anything worse had happened?

Sarah drove to the hospital at well over the speed limit. She didn’t care if she got a ticket, she just needed to get to her son. Her mind kept replaying the conversation with Charlie over and over on a loop. Her boy, her beautiful boy had been beaten up and stabbed. It didn’t seem real. The rational part of her brain realised she was in shock. Her whole body felt numb. She just needed to get there fast. Sarah abandoned her car in the car park, not bothering to get a car parking ticket. She raced into accident and emergency and up to the reception desk.

“My son has just been brought in? He’s been stabbed.” The receptionist looked up at her with sympathetic eyes. “Yes, can you confirm his name for me?”

“Nick…Nicholas Luke Nelson,” she gave the receptionist his date of birth and address. “Follow me, we have his boyfriend waiting in this room here. I’ll get someone to come and update you.” Sarah followed the receptionist into a small room. Charlie was sat slumped on a chair with his head in his hands. He looked up as the door opened. 

“Sarah,” his voice wobbled as he stood up and rushed into her arms. She held him as he cried. “Charlie, my darling. Are you ok? Did they hurt you?” Charlie looked up at her through wet eyelashes. How could she be worrying about him? “I’m fine, I wasn’t hurt.” He saw her face pale as she noticed the blood stained hoodie in his hands. Her hand flew to her mouth as she gasped at the sight. “Is that….all Nicks blood?” Charlie’s nodded as more tears poured down his cheeks. Sarah took a breath, Nick would be ok. He was young and strong, he’d get through this. 

A knock at the door interrupted her thoughts. “Ms Nelson?” A doctor came in and sat down on one of the chairs, gesturing for Sarah to join him.

She nervously sat down. “How is he?”

The doctor took a deep breath. “I’m going to give you an update on your son. First off, he is alive.” Sarah felt relief course through her, “ However Nicholas has been brought in with very serious injuries. He is currently unconscious but stable. He has a stab wound to the chest, numerous cuts and bruises. We have managed to stem the blood loss but he has lost an awful lot of blood. His breathing is laboured and we are worried the blade has nicked his lung. He has suffered trauma to his head and we are concerned about fractures to his skull. He has been taken down for scans and X-rays. He will be taken surgery once we know what we are dealing with.” He stopped to allow Sarah to digest this information. “Would you like to see him briefly before he goes into theatre?” Sarah couldn’t speak. She didn’t know what to say, this was a nightmare. She nodded at the doctor. Charlie had listened to the details of Nick’s injuries with horror but not surprise. He’d been there and witnessed it first hand. He tried to hold on to the fact Nick was stable. That was good. He realised Sarah had been talking to him. “Sorry?” He looked up at her. “I said, will you be ok for a few minutes. I’ll be back soon.” Charlie nodded at her, he was so desperate to see Nick but he knew it was family only. “Yeah, mums on her way.” 

Sarah followed the doctor down the corridor and into Resus. She was led to a bay at the end of the room and as she took in the sight in front of her her heart shattered. If she didn’t know it was her son in that bed she never would have believed it. His face was bruised and swollen. He had an oxygen mask over his nose and mouth. A bandage around his forehead which was stained with blood. Every inch of visible skin seemed to be bruised or bloodied. Wires and tubes were coming from all angles. Monitors were beeping next to him. He was deathly still. His breathing sounded odd. She could see he was receiving blood, a bag of it hanging on a stand next to him. She reached over to hold his hand, which had been bandaged up. She hesitated. She didn’t want to hurt him. Gently she stroked his arm. “Nick baby, I’m here. Mums here.” Nick didn’t wake up. She glanced up at the nurse who was monitoring him. “The doctors are going to make you all better darling, just hang on in there.” The nurse looked at her sympathetically. “I’m so sorry for what your son has gone through. He’s fighting hard. We are about to take him down to theatre. The surgeon is just examining his scans.” Sarah nodded at her without taking her eyes off her son. The bastards that did this would pay. 

The doctor returned, along with porters. “We are going to take him down now. I’ll know more once I get in but from his scans it does look like his lung needs repairing. The blade seems to have avoided other internal organs but again I’ll know more once we begin the surgery. I’m also worried about some internal bleeding. His skull is definitely fractured. He has some cracked ribs too.” Sarah felt tears spring to her eyes. She carefully leaned over and kissed Nick on his cheek, “I’ll be here when you wake up darling. I love you,” She watched as they wheeled him away towards theatre. 

Jane rushed inside the hospital, searching for someone who could help her. She tapped her feet as she waited her turn at the reception desk. She needed to get to Charlie, he sounded completely broken on the phone. She’d been ready for bed when he rang so she’d thrown on some clothes and rushed as quickly as she could. Finally it was her turn. “My son was brought here, with his boyfriend. Nick um….Nicholas Nelson?” The receptionist didn’t need to look up where to send her. She had not long taken Nick’s mum to the little room off A and E. “of course, let me take you to where your son is waiting.” She led Jane to the room and then returned back to her busy desk. Cases like Nick’s always made her want to phone her own kids and check they were ok. She hated the fact the world could be so evil. 

Charlie was sitting in the same seat where Sarah had left him when he looked up and saw his mum entering the room. She pulled him into a hug and let him cry until he had no more tears left. “I can’t lose him mum, what if he dies? It’s all my fault.” He should have fought back. He should have shouted louder. Anything to help Nick. But he just stood there and watched it happen. Before Jane had a chance to reply, Sarah was back in the room. She’d overheard Charlie’s sobbing confession.

“Charlie.” He whirled round, wide eyed. “Please don’t say that. Nick would never want you to say that.” She put her hand tenderly on his shoulder. “Thanks for coming Jane. I’m so sorry I left him on his own.” Jane hugged Sarah tight. It wasn’t fair that she was stood holding her son while Sarah’s was currently in hospital fighting to live. 

“How is he?” Jane looked anxiously at Sarah. Sarah visibly crumpled. She sat down on the chair and put her head in her hands for a moment. Taking a deep breath she looked up at Jane with tears in her eyes. “He’s in surgery. They let me see him for a minute but he was unconscious. Um, he has a skull fracture, broken ribs….the stab wound has nicked his lung so his breathing isn’t great. The doctor was worried about internal bleeding. They’ll know more when he’s in theatre. Those bastards really did a number on him.” She looked over to Charlie and grasped his hand. “The doctor said he’d come and find us when he’s out of surgery. “ Charlie nodded. There was no way he was going home until he knew Nick was going to be ok. 

A knock at the door startled them. Two police officers stood hovering in the doorway. “I’m sorry to intrude, we know this is a difficult time but we wanted to have a word with Charlie?” Charlie’s eyes widened. “My name is PC Barnes and this is PC Owen.” He indicated a Middle aged lady with short blonde hair next to him. She had a kind, sympathetic smile. “Um, ok,” he said softly. The officers took a seat opposite where Charlie, his mum and Sarah were sat. 

“We were hoping to get a statement from you about what happened? I know it’s been a horrendous night, but anything you can tell us will help us to catch the people who did it.” Jane narrowed her eyes, “does it need to be right now? He’s had a terrible shock.” PC Owen looked at her sympathetically. “I know it seems cruel to do it now, but while it’s fresh is the best. We won’t stay long.”

Charlie nodded. He could do this for Nick. If it might help. “Ok.” The police officers, Sarah and Jane listened as Charlie recounted the events that led up to the stabbing. Tears were streaming silently down Sarah’s face as she listened to what happened to Nick. How he was trying to protect Charlie, desperately trying to get to him. When Charlie told them how the leader had spat in his face, whispered something Charlie couldn’t hear and then stabbed him, Sarah broke down completely. It was a hate crime. Not just a horrible mugging gone wrong. This was a targeted hate crime against her baby for simply holding his boyfriend’s hand. Jane held Sarah’s hand. She couldn’t  imagine what she was going through. Charlie closed his eyes in exhaustion when he had finished. He never wanted to say any of those words out loud again. The officers were busy speaking to his mum. Thanking her for their time and saying they’d be in touch. There was cctv in the area and they were hoping to get a good look at the gang who were responsible. They were hopeful. 

Hours passed by with no news. Nobody spoke. Nobody knew what to say. They just sat and waited. Charlie couldn’t even bring himself to look at his phone. He didn’t have the energy. And he knew their friends would need to know what had happened but he just didn’t have the words right now. He needed to see Nick. To know he was ok. Finally, just after 2am, when Charlie was dozing in his chair, the door opened and the doctor appeared. Sarah immediately got to her feet. “How is he?” The doctor smiled at her, “Nicholas is out of surgery and in recovery. he did really well. We managed to repair the damage to his lung. Further inspection showed a crack in his left hand, so we’ve plastered that up. The ribs will heal by themselves as will the skull fracture. But it will take time and he’s going be very sore for a while. We will continue to monitor for internal bleeding. He’s still receiving blood as he lost a great deal. Once he’s come round from the anaesthetic he’ll be taken to the HDU to be monitored.”

“He’s going to be ok?” Charlie whispered. The doctor gave him a soft smile. “He’s fought hard, I’m not going to lie to you, he’s been very badly beaten and recovery will be slow, but he’s not in any immediate danger right now.” Charlie let out a relieved sob, turning to his mum for a hug. 

“Can we see him?” Sarah questioned the doctor. He glanced at the clock. “ it’s obviously not visiting hours on the HDU but why don’t you pop up to recovery with me for a few minutes before he’s transferred. I don’t think he’ll be very coherent when he does wake, with the head injury and the amount of morphine we have him on. But I know if he was my son I’d need to see him.”

Sarah gave him a grateful smile, and they followed the doctor up to recovery. Jane stayed back in the corridor. She didn’t want to overwhelm Nick. She let Charlie go with Sarah, sinking into a chair in the hallway as she waited. Sarah and Charlie stood at the foot of Nicks bed. He was fast asleep, still unconscious from the surgery. The blood had been cleaned up from his face and a fresh bandage was wrapped around his forehead. His arm was in a cast up to the elbow. There were so many bruises. Charlie could barely recognise him under all the swelling around his eyes. He took in all the different wires and tubes around the bed. It broke his heart that this had happened. They each stood on different sides of the bed. Charlie gently picked up Nicks right hand and gave it a small squeeze. Sarah rubbed his shoulder softy. “Baby, we are here. You have been so brave.” Sarah whispered into his ear. Charlie didn’t know what to say, “Hi Nick. I love you, I’m so sorry….” He dissolved into sobs. Sarah looked at him firmly. “Charlie, I said to you already. You can’t blame yourself. And Nick needs us to be strong right now, ok?” Charlie nodded. He could be strong for Nick. After everything that had happened he owed it to him to be strong. 

Charlie couldn’t take his eyes off of Nick, the damage that this thugs had done to his face.  He could  close his eyes without seeing them attack Nick as they forcefully kicked and punched him repeatedly. The sounds of their shoes colliding with Nick’s head. They way they laughed as they kicked the life out of his boyfriend’s body. They beat him up, stabbed him and left his lifeless body there in a heap.  It made Charlie feel sick.   He glanced at Nick, fully taking in his appearance again. His beautiful, bruised, swollen face. He had tubes and wires connected to almost every visible part of his body. There was a tube carrying a clear liquid, connected to the drip that in his left hand. Another tube snaked its way around the bed from where it was connected to his forearm, this one carrying blood. The doctor had mentioned that he was receiving a blood transfusion given the amount of blood he’s lost.

“I can’t believe this happened…” Charlie said shakily, not letting go of Nick’s hand. He glanced at Sarah who was holding Nick’s other hand to he lips as she placed gently kisses on his knuckles. She was whispering comforting words to her son. “We were minding our own business..” Charlie said softly. None of this made any sense.  Why had those evil men targeted them? He knew why. He just didn’t want to say it out loud.  They had done it because they didn’t agree with their sexuality. They had brutally beaten Nick to a pulp just because they didn’t like the fact that he was proudly walking the streets with his boyfriend.    

Suddenly the door opened and the nurse entered the room followed by the hospital porters who were ready to transfer Nick to the HDU.  “We’re ready to move Nick up to the High Dependency Unit.” The nurse told them softly as she checked some of the machines beside Nick’s bed, fiddling with some of the buttons. She scribbled something down on the clipboard at the end of the bed before lifting Nick’s eyelid and shining a small torch in to his eyes, hoping for a reaction. There wasn’t any.  He was still unconscious. Hopefully after the sedation and general anaesthetic had properly worn off, he would start to come round. He needed all the rest he could get. He has been through such a traumatic ordeal.    “Can I come with you?” Sarah asked. She couldn’t bare to be separated from her son.  She knew the doctor had explained earlier that the visiting hours on the ward were 11am-8pm but surely they weren’t expecting her to just go home and leave her baby. She couldn’t. She wouldn’t.   The nurse gave her a gentle smile.  “Of course you can. We try to stick to visiting hours on the unit, apart from exceptional cases.” She glanced at Nick. “This young man is going to need his mum by his side.”    Sarah breathed out a sigh of relief.  She would have point blank refused to leave if it had come to it. She needed to be there with Nick.   “Thank you so much…” she said sincerely to the nurse.   “It will probably take us a good 15-20 minutes to get him settled on to the unit. Why don’t you grab yourself a nice warm cup of tea before meeting us up there?” The nurse suggested. Sarah gave her a little forced smile.  The last thing she wanted was to leave Nick, even if it was just for a short while but she didn’t want to get in the way.  She would take this opportunity to take Charlie back to his mum and then try phoning Stéphane again.  She had tried phoning him twice already whilst Nicky had been in theatre but she had just been met by his voicemail.  This was so typical of her ex husband. She could never get a hold of him when she really needed to. She had managed to get through to her eldest son David, though. Who had been completely horrified to learn what had happened to his little brother. He had told her that he would get there as soon as he could. He was almost 5 hours away by car as he was at university in Glasgow but he was on his way and that’s what mattered.  Sarah had also spoken to her sister Diane who had wanted to be there but Sarah had told her to stay put until she had heard any news as she had two young children of her own in their beds. Sarah had promised to keep her up to date. If she knew her younger sister. She knew she’d been wide awake sitting by the phone, unable to sleep.   

Sarah and Charlie re-entered the little waiting room. Jane was sat in the same spot as she finished off her cup of tea. She stood up, immediately pulling her son in for a hug. He looked completely physically and mentally exhausted. He was 15 years old. He shouldn’t have to deal with what he has had to deal with tonight.   “They’re just moving Nick up to the HDU…” Sarah explained as she rubbed her hands down her face, exasperated.  Her eyes felt like they were hanging out of her head but she knew there was no way she was going to be able to get any sleep any time soon.     “Are they letting you stay?” Jane asked softly.  She knew if it had been Charlie, she would put up a fight to stay.   “Sarah didn’t give them much choice..” Charlie replied, giving Sarah a smile smirk, in which she smiled fondly.  “I’m going to grab a coffee and try to get Nick’s dad in the phone again whilst they settle him.” Sarah replied.  Jane nodded as she picked up her coat and handbag from the chair beside her. She ran her fingers gently through her son’s curls.  “I think it’s time we headed home, darling.” She told him.  Charlie glanced up to her. He didn’t want to leave.  How was he supposed to go home and sleep whilst Nick was still potentially fighting for his life. He knew his mum was right though and he knew there was no way he’d be able to stay, anyway. He would need to wait until visiting hours.  “Ok..” he reluctantly nodded.   He looked up at Sarah again. “You’ll let me know if anything happens?” He questioned.  “Absolutely, darling..” Sarah nodded as she pulled him in for a cuddle. “I promise.” Charlie smiled as he leaned into her embrace.    Jane gave Sarah a hug afterwards.  “You should try and get your head down for a few hours. Nicks going to need his Mum to have all her strength when he comes around…”. Sarah nodded even though she knew there was absolutely no way she was going to be able to sleep.  She watched as Charlie and Jane left, something caught her eye.

Nick’s hoodie was rolled up on a ball on one of the stairs.  She let out a choked sob  as she picked it up. She had gifted it to Nick only a few ones previously on his 17th birthday. It’s light grey colour stained with bright red blood. Nick’s blood. She felt her legs give in as she collapsed back in to the chair as he body was overtaken by violent sobs as the reality of the evening events finally caught up with her. She hugged the jumper to her chest as she cried.  Someone had done this to her baby. Someone had unleashed the most cruelest, unnecessary, violent attack on her little boy. Why? Because he’s bisexual? Because he was innocently out on a date with his boyfriend?  This was so wrong.

Calming herself down, Sarah took a breath and made her way up to HDU. She was shown to a private room where Nick had been settled. He looked the same, so very still. The same monitors beeping continuously, wires and tubes delivering fluids, blood and medicine. She would never get used to seeing him so battered and bruised. The image of him in this bed was going to haunt her forever. She pulled up a chair next to him and took hold of his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I’m back my darling.” Nick looked peaceful, she hoped he wasn’t in any pain. She sat by his side, murmuring reassurances to him as he slept on. Nurses were checking on him every 15 minutes, waiting for him to show signs of waking up.

Dawn was approaching, Sarah looked out the window as the sun started to rise in the distance. She yawned and stretched her arms up. She was exhausted. A noise startled her. A groan. She immediately looked to see Nick’s face scrunched up in pain. His mouth was moving. “Nicky, baby, I’m here. Mums here,” she leaned over to be close to his face. “Can you open your eyes baby?”

Pain. That was all Nick could register. Everywhere hurt. His body felt like he had been hit by a truck. He couldn’t move. He could hear beeping and a voice but his brain couldn’t work out who it was or where he was. He grimaced and tried to open his eyes. It hurt to even try. One of his eyes refused to open so he tried to squeeze the other one. A harsh light hit him and he closed it again, moaning in pain. Sarah quickly pushed the emergency button and the nurse appeared immediately. 

“Everything ok?” The nurse, who had introduced herself earlier that night as Beth, looked at Sarah sympathetically. 

“I think he’s trying wake up,” Sarah stroked Nicks cheek, trying to soothe him. “He seems to be in a lot of pain.” her voice cracked with emotion. She wanted to take this pain away from him, she’d give anything to make him feel better. 

“Ok, let’s take a look!” Nurse Beth began her checks of Nick. He groaned as she lifted his eyelid and shone a light in his eyes. “Yes, he’s definitely waking up. That’s really good news. I’ll top up his pain relief and fetch the doctor to come and check on him.” She fiddled with the pump of his IV and then left the room to locate the doctor. 

“Come on baby, it’s time to wake up,” Sarah gently tried to coax him awake. She was so desperate for him to wake up. 

Nick managed to open his eye a little. The pain was still intense but slightly less. His vision was blurry and he couldn’t make out who was with him, but he could hear her, it was his mum. She was here. He was so frightened. He had no idea where he was or why everything hurt so much. 

The doctor appeared, bringing various equipment with him. “Morning, I gather this young man is trying to wake up?” He glanced at Sarah who nodded. “Great. I want to do some quick tests, check his vitals. He’s going to take a while to wake up so don’t be alarmed if he’s in and out of it for most of today.“ the doctor began his checks. He lifted up Nick’s gown, exposing his torso. Sarah was horrified at the large bruising all over his stomach. The surgical incision was neatly covered with a dressing. The doctor gently pressed on Nick’s tummy. Nick let out a loud groan of pain. “Hmm….”the doctor glanced at the nurse. “Can you fetch the portable ultrasound?”

“What’s wrong?” Sarah looked on in concern. Nick’s face was now twisted in pain and he was letting out a series of moans. “I’m a bit concerned there might be some internal bleeding. His stomach is distended and obviously very sore.”

Nick could hear the voice of a man. He couldnt focus of what he was saying or doing. He was suddenly  aware of a searing pain in his stomach. The intensity took him by surprise and he tried to yell but all he could manage was a groan. His stomach felt weird. He was going to be sick. He tried to alert someone but before he had a chance he felt himself begin to cough and retch. 

Sarah looked on in horror as Nick coughed and began to vomit. Her fear intensifying as she realised he was vomiting blood. The nurse immediately turned him onto his side so he didn’t choke. “What’s happening?” Sarah pleaded with the doctor. The doctor remained calm as Beth suctioned Nicks mouth clean and laid him gently back down. He placed a cold jelly like substance on Nicks stomach and used the ultrasound to see what was happening. “Nurse, tell theatre we are on our way with an internal haemorrhage. He has a large bleed in his abdomen. My guess is his spleen but we need to get in there fast.” Beth disappeared and within seconds the room was filled with medical staff and porters who began to wheel him away at speed. 

“Please, tell me what’s happening?  Is he going to be ok?” Sarah could feel tears pouring down her face. “Sarah, we need to take him back into surgery. He’s bleeding somewhere internally and the doctors need to get in there and find it and stop it. He’s in good hands. Just wait here and we will update you as soon as we can.” 

Chapter Text

The room emptied and she was left alone. Sarah sat back down in the chair. She was in complete shock. She’d thought he was waking up. That this nightmare was starting to be over. And now he was back in surgery, vomiting blood. She put her head in her hands. She couldn’t phone David and panic him on his way here. The last thing she needed was him to get into a car accident. She knew she needed to update her sister, and the Springs. She had promised Charlie. Shakily she picked up her phone. It was almost 7am she wondered if they would be awake. She dialled Jane’s number.

“Sarah?” Jane sounded like she was half asleep. “Is everything ok?”

Sarah tried to speak but all she could do was cry. “Sarah?” Jane was suddenly very awake. “Is everything ok with Nick?” Sarah tried to calm herself down.

“Um, no. He woke up very briefly just now….” Jane listened, giving Sarah time to gather her thoughts. “ but he started vomiting blood and they’ve rushed him back into surgery. He’s bleeding internally.”

Jane gasped. Poor Nick, he didn’t deserve any of this. He was protecting her boy, she owed him everything. “Oh my god Sarah I’m so sorry. Is anyone with you?” She heard Sarah sniffing, “David will be here very soon. I’m sorry to phone you, but I promised Charlie I’d let him know if anything changed.”

Jane’s heart sank. How was she going to break this to Charlie? “Of course, thank you for calling. Can we do anything to help? Charlie will want to come over.”

“You are both welcome to come later. I don’t know how long he’ll be in surgery though or if…..” she couldn’t bring herself to finish that sentence. If he was going to survive.

“I’ll speak to Charlie. You hang in there Sarah. He’s a fighter. He’ll pull through.”

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David cracked open the can of his energy drink as he crossed over the carpark of St Marks hospital towards the main entrance of the building. It was his 2nd can over the last 5 hours, along with the coffee he had picked up at a McDonald’s drive thru a few hours ago.  He had needed all the caffeine possible on his drive to Kent from Glasgow. He couldn’t believe what he had heard as he answered his mother’s call. He should have known something was up right away. Why else would she be calling him at quarter to midnight on a Sunday?? He knew as soon as he heard her panicked voice on the phone that something was really wrong.

David was sat in his Uni room. He had exams coming up over the next few weeks. He was supposed to be studying. His idea was of studying, though, was to have every book open, sprawled across his bed but paying little attention to it as he decapitated zombies on the Xbox instead.  He picked up the last slice of Pizza out of his take-away box. It was Sunday. He had spent the day lazing about, mostly sleeping off the hangover as a result of his mad night the previous evening.  Sundays were for chilling, pretending to study followed by a late night pizza delivery.  He had just devoured the slice when he heard his phone vibrating on the bedside table. He ignored it. It was probably one of his mates, drunk, and wanting to talk his ears off for the next couple of hours. Not happening! David thought to himself as he let it ring off, only for it to start ringing a few moments later.  David groaned in annoyance at being disturbed, yet again. He pulled himself up off his beanbag chair and strode over to where his phone was charging. He wasn’t expecting to see his Mum’s name flashing up on his screen though.  Why would she be calling him? at quarter to twelve on a Sunday night? She was normally tucked up in bed at this time, considering she had work in the morning.  David frowned as an unnerving feeling washed over him. Something was wrong. He could feel it.  He quickly picked the phone up. He hit answer and placed the phone against his ear.  “Hello? Mum?”

“Oh David, thank god!!” Sarah’s voice came through the other end of the call. It sounded strained, thick with emotion, almost as if she had been crying. There was that feeling of dread in his stomach again. Something was really wrong.  “Mum?? What’s going on? You never call this late..”

“Sweetheart somethings happened.” Sarah told him as she tried her best not to break down in tears over the phone.  “It’s your brother…”  David felt a numbing feeling wash over his body. What was it? Had something happened to Nick? No. Surely not?  “He’s been attacked David…Nicky’s in hospital..”   Attacked? Hospital? David’s mind started racing at thousand miles. Who would attack his brother?  Nick was the sort of guy that didn’t attract many enemies. He’d always been a popular. Likeable lad. Much to David’s jealousy.  Who would hurt him?  “What???” He breathed out.  “He’s okay, though, yeah?” He asked. It couldn’t be too serious if someone had just roughed him up a little bit.   “No, David…he’s not okay.” Sarah’s voice trembled. David paled. What did she mean? Nick wasn’t…no. Please. No.  He felt his chest tightening up as his vision began to swim around him. He had to sit down. He felt himself collapse on to the bed with his phone still glued to his ear.  “He’s alive…” Sarah broke the icy silent. David let out a shaky breath of relief.  “Oh David.” Sarah cried, her sobs getting louder and harder on the end of the phone.  “They’ve beaten him up so viciously.” She sobbed.  “His face is a mess, they’ve broken multiple ribs and fractured his skull.”  David’s eyes filled with rage.  Someone had done this to his little brother. Why? Sure, their brotherly relationship was strained but the thought of someone purposely harming his brother made him furious.  “They stabbed him, David…” Sarah whispered.  “They stabbed him in the chest.”    David’s eyes flew open in horror.  Someone had pulled a knife out on his baby brother and actually used it?  “What? Oh my god…” David replied in a shallow voice. His brain refusing to process all of the information.  “But he’s going to be okay?” He said desperately.  “Nick? He’s going to be alright?”  “He’s in surgery, sweetheart..” Sarah explained to him.  “They think the blade has punctured his lung, he’s lost a dangerous amount of blood. We just have to be patient…” Sarah breathed out as her sobs quietly subsided a little bit.   “What hospital??” David said quickly as he gripped his phone in one hand as he had already started chucking things in to a duffel bag with the other.  “St Marks…” Sarah replied.   “I’ll leave now.” David stated. “If I do I might be able to just avoid morning rush hour traffic.” He assured her.  “Ok, darling.” Sarah replied.  “David???”   “Yeah?” David responded as he chucked some clean underwear and some toiletries into his bag along with some clothes and his phone charger.  “Please drive carefully…” She told him in a shaky voice.  “I love you.”   “I love you too, mum.” David said quickly.  “I’ll be there as soon as I can, I promise.”

David ended the call before shoving his phone in to his jeans pocket, zipping up his bag and locking up his uni flat. He darted across the road to the little off license shop that was situated directly across from his block of flats. He purchased a handful of energy drink cans and a packet of cigarettes. David didn’t smoke very often, only when he was worried or stressed about something. He used to smoke more frequently during his late teenage years but he had cut right back when he had started university. Boy did he need a cigarette now.    David climbed into his car, glancing at the time as he started up the engine.  12:09am. If he played his cards right. He should arrive in Kent for around 5:30ish, 6am at the latest. He backed out of his parking spot and drove off. He just needed to get there.

David chugged down his can of red bull as he approached the main entrance to St Marks General Hospital.  It was just after 6am. He had made good time, considering he had stopped off for a coffee and a smoke around half way in to his journey.  The sun had just come up. David was exhausted. His eyes hurt from being on the road for so long but he pushed his need for sleep to the back of his mind he just needed to get inside, locate his mum and find out how Nick was.  He disposed of the can in a bin just outside the hospital before entering and headed over to the main reception. “Hi, could you tell me where Nick Nelson is??” He asked the middle aged woman behind the desk.  “He was brought in late last night after being attacked…” The nurse typed something in to her computer, her long nails tapping against the keyboard. “Ah yes.” she then glanced at David. “I’m afraid it’s only immediate family permitted on the HDU-“.   David quickly cut her off. “I am family.  Nick’s my brother…” he pulled out his wallet, showing her his ID. She was wasting so much time. He knew it was all just procedure but he just had to find Sarah.  The nurse glanced at the ID before nodding in satisfaction. She directed David towards the HDU unit, telling him to ask someone on the floor to help him locate where Nick was.

David rushed towards the lift, punching in level 2. Once he was on the floor, he followed the signs that pointed towards HDU. He hated hospitals. It was like being stuck in the crystal maze.  He located the double doors that lead on to the unit. They were securely locked so he pressed the buzzer on the wall and was greeted by a young nurse.  “Hello, can I help you?”   “Hi. I’m looking for my brother Nick Nelson?” David responded, he could have swore he saw the young nurse pale in the face as she nodded softly. “If you just follow me, your mums just down this hall..”  David frowned as he stepped through the doors and began following the nurse. He hadn’t missed how she mentioned taking him to Sarah, rather than directing him to where Nick was.   

David was lead to a small room. He took a deep breath before pushing the door open, he felt his chest hurt as he saw the broken appearance of his mum. She was slumped down on one of the hard plastic chairs. She looked absolutely exhausted, her eyes were bloodshot, puffy and red. Like she had been crying all night. She was nursing a coffee in her hands but didn’t look like she was making much effort to drink it. Her head shot up as she heard the door creak open and she immediately leapt up as she saw her eldest son.  “David!!” She engulfed him in a tight hug. Thank god he was here.  David held his mum tightly in his arms.  Where was Nick? Surely he wasn’t still in surgery? He had spoken to Sarah on the phone almost 7 hours ago.  “Mum…” David broke the silence as he pulled away from her embrace.  “Where’s Nick?”    He watched as Sarah’s face crumbled again as fresh tears began to stream down her face. “They had to take him back to surgery.” She cried.  She felt completely numb at experiencing her baby being rushed in for life threatening surgery twice in one evening.   David paled.  “What? Why?”    Sarah shook her head.  “I don’t know exactly.” She sighed. “They just mentioned more internal bleeding…” that’s all I know.  David held on to her hand as guided her back over to the seating area. “What the hell happened mum?” He asked. He couldn’t piece this all together. Who would do this to Nick? Who would mug him?    “Did they get anything? The muggers? Did they take anything?” He asked. He had to know.  Sarah glanced at her son and it finally clicked. David thought Nick had been mugged? Oh how wrong was he.   “Nick wasn’t mugged, darling…” she explained to him softly.  David’s eyebrows creased in confusion. “He wasn’t??” He questioned.  “You said he was attacked…I…I just thought.”   “He was attacked.” Sarah said bluntly. David frowned. This wasn’t making any sense.  “I don’t understand…”  Sarah swallowed a lump that had formed in her throat as she tried to find the right words.  “Nick and Charlie were out on a date last night…” she started. David’s eyes widened.  Surely this wasn’t going where he thought it was.  “They were targeted by some thugs. They started hurling homophobic abuse at them…” she seethed. “Some of the things they were saying..” she recalled what Charlie had told her as he relived the evening events to the police, earlier.  “They tried to attack Charlie, but Nick…Nicky stepped in and they…they turned on him..”

David couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Nick was attacked because he was with Charlie? “I can’t believe it,” he whispered. “Was Charlie hurt too?” Sarah squeezed his hand, shaking her head. “Charlie wasn’t hurt. Nick stepped in before anything could happen….” So Nick was here because he was protecting Charlie? That sounded like Nick, so selfless. He’d never let anything happen to Charlie. “Oh.” He didn’t know what to say. “There were 4 men, one held Charlie back while the others did this to Nicky.” David felt numb. “And now he’s back in surgery? Did he wake up at all?” He looked at his mum with such anguish. “He briefly opened his eyes but he didn’t say anything. He was in a lot of pain and then he vomited…..but it was all blood. So much blood. They took him straight back to theatre. I don’t know anything more.” David pulled his mum into a hug. This was just so unbelievable. He knew he had been a bit of a dick when Nick had first come out as bi. Well a giant dick really. But he never wanted anything like this to happen. He would never forgive himself if Nick didn’t survive this and the last thing he did was be a giant pain in the arse to him.

“I’ll get you a fresh coffee.” David stood up and headed in the direction of the vending machine. He needed a moment to digest the news away from his mums devastated face.

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Jane steeled herself and gently opened Charlie’s bedroom door. He was lying in his bed, in his pyjamas tucked under the covers. But he was wide awake staring at the ceiling. It didn’t look like he had slept at all. His eyes were red rimmed, he was cuddling kitty to his chest. “Hi sweetheart,” Charlie sat up quickly, rubbing his eyes. “Has there been any news?” He looked desperately at his mum, searching her face for answers. Jane sat down next to him on the bed and took his hand. “Sarah just called,” she paused. “Um, they’ve had to take Nick back into surgery.”

Charlie gasped, “what, why??” His eyes were wide with fear, what had happened now, They said he was stable?

“He started to vomit blood. They think he has some internal bleeding.” She couldn’t sugar coat it, there was no easy way to deliver this news. Charlie let out a sob. “Oh my god. Is he going to be ok?”

Jane sighed. “I don’t know darling. We just have to be patient.” Charlie’s sagged back against his pillow. This was just so unfair. He needed to get back to the hospital to be with him when he came out of theatre. “Can we go back to the hospital mum? Please? I need to be there.” Jane smiled softly at him. It was Monday and he should really be going to school but she knew there was absolutely no way he was in a fit state to do so after the shock of last night. “Of course we can. I’m going to phone school and my work to let them know we won’t be in today.” Charlie hugged her tightly. “Thanks mum,” he whispered.

Jane left to put the kettle on for some tea. Charlie reached over for his phone. He needed to let their friends know what had happened. They’d all be on their way to school soon and soon notice their absence. He navigated to the group chat. How on earth should he word this.

Hey guys. Something bad has happened. I don’t know how to tell you so I’m just going to type it out. It’s really really awful. Me and Nick went for a date night last night. A group of men started hassling us saying homophobic shit. They grabbed me. Nick tried to fight them off but they turned on him. They beat him up really badly. Then one of them stabbed him. He’s in a bad way. He had surgery last night to fix his lung where the knife went in. But he’s back in surgery with internal bleeding. He has broken ribs, a skull fracture, a broken hand. I’m sorry to be so blunt but I don’t know how to tell you. I’m going back to the hospital to see how he is this morning. I’ll keep you updated. Love you guys.

He pressed send before he could overthink it. Within seconds his phone started ringing. Tao. He answered it.

“Charlie? Oh my god. Are you ok? What the hell?” Tao sounded completely beside himself. “I know,” he sighed. “It’s like a nightmare that I can’t wake up from.”

“Did they hurt you?” Tao asked. Charlie let out a sob, “No. I don’t have a scratch on me. Nick took it all.” He started to cry, “it was so scary Tao. They had him on the floor and they just kept kicking and hitting him over and over.  His face was so swollen.” He heard Tao’s gasp of horror. Nick was the softest, kindest person he had ever met, how could anyone want to hurt him. “Then the main leader of the gang pulled out a knife and just stabbed him in the chest. Just like that. Like he was nothing. There was so much blood.” He looked down at his fingernails where, despite scrubbing them over and over again, he could still see traces of Nick’s blood in the creases. Tao’s voice was shaky when he replied, “I’m so sorry Charlie. Can I do anything to help?” Charlie smiled softly. Tao was such a loyal friend. “Um, can you maybe tell everyone I won’t be replying to messages for a bit. I just can’t face it.”

“Of course, consider it done. Call me if you need me ok? I’ll message them now.”

Charlie thanked him and hung up. He dragged himself to the shower and got ready to go back to the hospital. His mind kept wandering to Nick. Was he still in surgery? Had they stopped the bleeding? He needed to be there.

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David and Sarah were sat outside the HDU waiting for news. David kept getting up, pacing the room, he couldn’t sit still. Sarah was slumped in her chair, exhausted. She hadn’t slept a wink all night and she felt on the brink of collapse. The double doors opened and Sarah looked up to see Nick being wheeled back into his room. She jumped out of the chair and was by his side in an instant. “Nicky, darling I’m here.” She took in his appearance. He had an oxygen mask over his face and his skin was chalk white, ghostly. He was asleep, no trace of pain on his face. She looked up at the doctor as his bed was positioned back in the room, nurses busy reattaching the wires and tubes.”is he ok?”

The doctor gestured to the corridor and Sarah followed him, David trailing close behind. He led her to the small waiting room. “Ms Nelson, we managed to locate the site of the bleeding. It was his spleen, so we have removed it.” Sarah paled, that sounded serious. The doctor continued. “ I’m confident we have the bleeding stopped now, however he has lost a lot of blood over the last 12 hours. He’s most definitely not out of the woods, but I think the worst is over.” David listened on in shock. His baby brother had to have his spleen removed? “What happens now?” He asked. The doctor looked at him kindly. “Now, we wait. Nick needs time to heal. This has been a set back but I’m still confident he will pull through. We are giving him a blood transfusion. But our supplies are quite low, especially with his blood type.” David immediately responded. “We have the same blood type. I could donate?” Sarah smiled at him. That was so out of character for David, she could see how devastated he was. Maybe this horrendous time would bring her two boys closer together? The doctor patted him on the shoulder. “That’s very kind of you, we should be fine though. We’ve requested a batch from the nearby hospital. Although if you want to donate I can give you the address of the local donation centre. We can always use new donors.” David nodded. He would definitely do that. Anything that could help people like Nick. His mum pulled him into a hug. “That’s a lovely idea David, Nick would be so happy to know that you were going to do that.” David shrugged. He wasn’t sure Nick would care. Not after how horrible he had been to him. The doctor led them back to Nicks room. “He won’t be awake for a while now, two anaesthetics in such a short space of time. I expect he’ll be asleep for most of the day.

“He’s not in any pain is he?” Sarah asked the doctor; she couldn’t bare the thought of her son feeling any pain broke her.   “We have him heavily sedated at the moment, so that when the anaesthetic wears off he will remain asleep. We will be keeping his morphine topped us as well..” the doctor assured her as he injected a clear liquid into the one of the IV ports in Nick’s forearm.  Sarah glanced at the doctor and smiled softly as he slipped out of the room. Sarah kept a firm grip of Nick’s hand as he slept under the effect of the drugs.  His face was relaxed and she was glad to see what he didn’t seem to be experiencing any discomfort.  “You just sleep my darling…” she soothed as she ever so gently touched her fingers to his swollen, bruised and battered face. How could someone do this??  Needlessly beat someone to a pulp just because they were expressing their sexuality.  “It’s all over now baby.”

David who had hung back in the room the full time as the doctor got Nick settled, stepped forward. He was finally getting the first proper glance at what those bastards had done to his little brother.  He glanced down at Nick. There was not one part of his younger brothers face that wasn’t bruised or battered, his eyes were swollen shut, he had a cut above his eyebrow that had needed stitches, his head bandaged up. Skull fracture? The doctor mentioned how Nick had received numerous blunt force blows to the head, presumably by being kicked repeatedly.  It made David feel Sick.  Not only that but they had broken several of Nick’s ribs, broken his hand which David could only imagine was from Nick trying to shield and defend himself from the blows. The more severe extent of the damage was hidden under his hospital gown. They had stabbed him. It filled David with rage that some monster had pulled a knife on his baby brother and actually used it. Stabbing him and running away from the scene as if Nick was nothing.   David glanced over at Sarah who seemed to be in her own little world as well.

“Do they know who did this?” He asked.  Sarah snapped out of her thoughts and glanced over at her elder son.  “I don’t think so…” she said quietly. It angered her knowing that the evil men that had done this to her son, the men that had put her Nicky and Charlie through hell, were still out there roaming the streets.  It wasn’t fair. It was an injustice.  What if they did this to someone else? Some other poor family.  “Weren’t there any witnesses?” David sighed. Surely someone else must’ve seen something.   “It was dark and it was late. Byers road is such a lonely area, you know that.” Sarah sighed.   “What the hell was Nick even doing there?” David sighed exasperated. “Why didn’t you just stick to the main road, eh?” He said quietly as he glanced down at his brother again.  Sarah sighed.   “They probably thought it was quicker to go that way. David, we can’t get hung up on that what ifs…” she sighed.  “This has happened. We can’t rewind the clocks we just have to be patient and hope that the police will catch the thugs that have done this…”    “If they don’t, I will..” David said firmly. His eyes dark.   Sarah sighed. The last thing she needed was David getting caught up in trouble.  “David…”   “If I find out who’s done this…” David said assuringly.  “I’ll kill them…”     Sarah sighed. It was nice to see David displaying his genuine concern for Nick but the last thing he was needing was David getting all hot headed and getting himself in to trouble.   David glanced at his mum. He didn’t want to upset her or cause her anymore grief. “Sorry…” he mumbled.  “I…I just don’t understand why someone would do this.”    “They were homophobic, darling.”  Sarah told him flatly.  “That’s why they did this.”   David felt like he had been slapped across the face as his mother’s words hit him like a tonne of bricks.  He played back every mean, homophobic comment he had ever chucked at Nick after discovering his bi-sexuality. He felt Sick. He was just as bad as the guys that had done this.

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Charlie showered and brushed his teeth. Jane tried to get him to eat some food before she’d allow him to leave them house.  Charlie wasn’t hungry. How on earth was he supposed to eat? When Nick was laying in a hospital bed.  He just wanted to be there, but visiting hours on the HDU didn’t start until midday. He would just have to wait so he managed to force a slice of lightly buttered toast down his throat just to satisfy his mother.

Tori was worried about her brother. She had been absolutely horrified to find out about Charlie and Nick’s attack. She had wanted to go to the hospital with Jane last night but she had told her to stay put. Jane didn’t know what state Charlie would be in at the time as all she knew was that he and Nick had been victims of a homophobic attack.  She has been so relieved when Jane and Charlie had come home early hours of the morning. Tori hadn’t been able to sleep a wink. She was relieved when she seen that Charlie seemed to be unharmed, but then she learned of the state that Nick had been left in. It made her feel sick to her stomach. How could anyone do that to Nick?  He was the kindest, most selfless person ever. Why would anyone want to hurt him?

Tori was just finishing off breakfast when Charlie came down. She had a feee period this morning didn’t have to be there until 10:30am. Tori took in the appearance of her brother. He looked shattered. Like he hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep yet. He hadn’t. His hair was messier than usual, his eyes tired and bloodshot.   “Hi..” he said as she slurped some diet lemonade through a straw. Charlie glanced at his sister as he entered the kitchen.  “Hi…” he said as he switched on the kettle to boil.  He needed a cup of tea.   “Did you sleep at all?” Tori asked as she finished taking in his dishevelled appearance.  “No.” Charlie replied as he stirred in some milk to his brew. Confirming Tori’s suspicions.  Tori sighed as she buttered some toast.  She paused for a moment before hesitantly asking.  “Have you heard from the hospital?”   Charlie flopped down on one of the chairs at the breakfast table, putting his head in his hands.   “Nick was rushed back in to surgery around 5am…” he sighed.  “He was showing signs of internal bleeding so they had to take him back to theatre where they discovered his spleen had ruptured so they had to remove it..”. Tori’s eyes widened. “Oh my god…” she mumbled. It was bad enough that Nick had to have one surgery let alone two.  “He’s lost so much blood…he’s had to have multiple transfusions.” Charlie sighed, running his hands down his face.  “It’s all my fault.”

Tori paled and she quickly got up before marching over to Charlie and crouching down beside him.  “Charlie.” She said firmly. “This isn’t your fault!” She exclaimed. “You were attacked too…”  “I don’t even have a scratch on me, Tor.” Charlie hit back.   “Nick is black and blue and so broken…because of me.” He cried. Tori shook her head. She wasn’t going to sit here and listen to Charlie blame himself about this. He was just as much as a victim as Nick. Those men had targeted him, hurled homophobic abuse at him, too.  “This is not your fault, Charlie.” Tori repeated. “How do you think it would make Nick feel if he knew you were blaming yourself?”    “Nick’s unconscious Tori.” Charlie responded.  “But how do you think he’d feel?” Tori asked him again. She knew Nick would be devastated if he knew that Charlie was beating himself up over this.   “He’d be upset.” Charlie sighed.  “Exactly!! He’d hate it.” Tori replied as she put her hand on her little brothers knee. “It is such an awful thing that has happened, but it’s nobody’s fault except for the evil bastards that did this. Okay??” She said as she squeezed his hand.  Charlie looked down at his sister’s face, his tears threatening to fall again.   “Ok…” he said softly as Tori wrapped him in a bone crunching hug.  She always made him feel better. She really did have older sister magic.

Meanwhile back at the hospital. Sarah and David still held a vigil at Nick’s bedside. David had dosed off in the chair at Nick’s right side as Sarah sat on his left. She kept a tight hold of her son’s hand as she watched his chest rise and fall with every breath. She glanced at the coffee that was sitting in the side, David had fetched it for her ages ago. It would be cold by now but she just couldn’t bring herself to leave. She’d hate herself if she wasn’t there for Nick waking up even though the doctor had told her that he would probably be out for most of the day.  She couldn’t believe this had happened. The doctor had explained to her that Nick’s spleen had been removed as the blunt force of a shoe or boot when he was kicked in the stomach had caused a splenic rupture and that had caused the internal haemorrhage. When she had asked would there be complications or would Nick live a normal life following the removal of the organ, he had responded that yes, you can live without a spleen but because it plays a crucial role in the body’s ability to fight off certain bacteria, living without the organ puts you at higher risk of infections. Nick would just need to be careful and make sure he kept up to date with vaccinations etc.  Sarah felt her eyes growing heavy but she was determined to fight the sleep. She was suddenly interrupted by a knock at the door. She glanced up to see her younger sister at the door. She breathed out a sigh of relief.  Oh how she needed her.

Beep. Beep. Beep. Nick felt like he was floating. Every breath he took ached and felt like he had an anchor on his chest. What the hell was that irritating beeping sound? He tried to open his eyes but his eyelids felt like lead. They felt heavy and sore. Everything felt sore.  His whole face ached liked he had been smacked with an iron bar. Everything hurt. He felt weird. Like he was in-between being asleep and being awake. He could hear soft voices beside him. He could hear the annoying beeping. He could smell a strong sterile, antiseptic like smell. His arm felt heavy and he felt like he was pinned to the bed. He could feel his body drifting towards the darkness again. He didn’t want to sleep again. He wanted to know what on earth was happening, but he was just so goddamn tired. He let out a little moan before falling into darkness again as his body succumbed to the much needed sleep.

“Nicky?” Sarah asked immediately as she heard a tiny moan escape her son’s lips. She glanced down seeing the creases in his forehead relax out again as he made no effort to open his eyes.   “Is he waking up?” Diane asked as she stepped further in to the room.    “I don’t think so.” Sarah replied. Nick was still very much asleep.  “I hope he’s not hurting.” She said quietly. She couldn’t bare that.    Diane gave her sister the biggest hug imaginable.   “I know you told me not to come..” she started.  “I…I just couldn’t sit at home and do nothing, I needed to be here.” She admitted as she pulled away from the hug.  “Rich got the twins sorted for school and did drop off this morning…”   Sarah reached out and squeezed her sisters hand. “I’m glad you came.” She said sincerely.  Diane smiled softly before turning to her eldest nephew, engulfing him in a cuddle. “When did you get here?” She asked him.  “Few hours ago.” David replied as he accepted his aunties hug and sat back down.   Diane finally allowed her eyes to focus on her youngest nephew. She gasped as she took in the damage to his beautiful face.

“Oh my god,” she whispered as her hand flew to her mouth. She couldn’t see a single inch of skin that wasn’t bruised or cut or bandaged up. She had prepared herself that he was going to look bad but she couldn’t have imagined this in her worse nightmares. Who could do such a thing to her sweet gentle nephew.

“I know,” Sarah fought back tears as she watched her sister take in Nick’s appearance. Diane made her way to the side of the bed and gently picked up his hand. “Hi sweetheart, your Auntie Di is here, I’m so sorry this happened to you.” She carefully stroked his hand. “Has the doctor said anything?”

Sarah sighed, “we just need to give him time. He lost so much blood, first with the stabbing and then the internal bleeding. He seemed confident he would pull through but it is going to take time and patience.” Diane nodded in agreement. “You take your time my darling. We will all be here for you when you,are ready to wake up.”

A nurse interrupted them and began doing his obs, fiddling with his monitors. “All looks stable so far,” she squeezed Sarah’s arm, “ you really do have a fighter there. It’s never easy to see such a young person the victim of violence.” She looked at Sarah with sympathy.

“It was a hate crime.” Sarah said with conviction. “My baby is in this state because those animals didn’t like him holding hands with his boyfriend.” She could feel herself getting angry at how unjust it all was.

“That’s awful,” the nurse looked genuinely upset. “My brother is gay, I can’t imagine what it would be like to hear that happened to him.” She hugged Sarah, “we will take extra special care of him, I promise.”

After the nurse left, Sarah, David and Diane continued their watch over Nick. Every now and then a small moan or groan would escape his lips but for the majority of the morning he slept on under the anaesthetic and sedation.

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Tao walked to school, his mind whirling with the events of last night. He couldn’t get his head round it, it sounded like something from a tv show. He spotted Tara, Darcy, Elle and Isaac huddled on one of the benches to the side of the entrance. He jogged over to them. “Hi guys,” they all turned to look at him. Darcy had tears streaming down her face, Elle’s eyes were red rimmed. Everyone looked completely devastated.

“Tao,”Elle held out her arms and they all hugged each other fiercely. “What did Charlie say when you spoke to him? Is he ok? Have you heard anything more about Nick?”

Tao climbed up on the table, his feet on the bench. He sighed. “Charlie was completely beside himself. He asked me to put that message on the group about him not replying, he said he can’t face it. I haven’t heard anything more than he said really.”  Nobody spoke for a minute, all in their own minds trying to understand what had happened to their friends. “It’s just…..” Tara’s began, “I just can’t believe it. It doesn’t seem real.”

“I don’t know what to do,” Elle sniffed, stifling a sob, “I feel like i need to do something but I just don’t know what.” Tao put his arm around her. “I know. We don’t even know if he’s out of surgery yet…. If he’s ok….”

“He’s not ok,” Darcy spat, tears still running down her cheeks. “All those injuries….Nick wouldn’t hurt a fly. How could those bastards do something like that.”

“Was Charlie hurt?” Isaac looked to Tao, who shook his head. “No, he said that they grabbed him but then Nick stepped in and they all attacked him.”

Isaac sighed. “I’m glad he’s ok, but knowing Charlie he’s going to be feeling really guilty about that.”

Tao nodded, “yeah he does. I’ll text him later and try to find out what’s happening.” The bell sounded and they all looked at each other.

“I guess we’ll meet up after school? Maybe see if we can visit or at least see Charlie?”

They all agreed and reluctantly the girls headed into Higgs leaving Tao and Isaac to go alone to Truham.

It was just before lunch when Nick showed the first real signs of waking up. Sarah and Diane were sitting on one side of the bed, David on the other. Diane was trying to take their mind off everything, talking about the latest antics of the twins. David was only half listening, his face was fixed firmly on his brother. It was like he couldn’t look away. Cataloguing all his injuries. If he ever found out who did this…..he didn’t care if he ended up in jail. They would pay. So he noticed when Nicks face scrunched up in pain, lines appearing on his forehead. “Mum?” He whispered. She looked over at him, then at Nick who was clearly trying to wake up, his mouth opening under the oxygen mask.

“Nick baby? “ Sarah took his hand and squeezed it gently, not wanting to hurt him anymore more than he already was.

Nick could hear that annoying beeping sound again. He couldn’t work out where he was. Why did his whole body hurt? He creased his brow as he fought to open his eyes. He had no idea where he was. He tried to think through the haze in his brain. What was the last thing he remembered? He was out with Charlie. They were getting chips….then…he had a small flash of something. Men? And fear? Then pain….and now beeping. He opened his eyes a fraction. He heard his mum.

“Nick?” Sarah leaned close to his face so he could try to focus on her but she could see he wasn’t really properly conscious yet. “Baby, I’m right here. You are ok my darling. Can you hear me?” Nick managed a small nod. He tried to speak but there was something on his face, covering his mouth. He wanted to raise his arm and take it off but one small movement caused a cry of pain to slip from his lips. Sarah held his hand gently. “Keep the mask on Nicky, it’s helping you to breathe.” Oh, why did he have a mask? He was so so confused. Where was Charlie? He felt worry in his stomach about him but he couldn’t remember why.

He tried to speak “Ch…..Ch…Char?” He managed to groan out. Sarah smiled softly at him. “He’ll be here soon baby.” Nick was exhausted. He nodded slowly, then closed his eyes and fell back to sleep.

Sarah choked down a sob. Diane pulled her into a hug, “Shall I fetch the doctor? Tell him he’s waking up?” Sarah shook her head. “He said it would be like this most of the day. It’ll be a while before he wakes up properly.”

Charlie and Jane took the lift up to the HDU of the hospital. Sarah had text her to say the operation had gone well and Nick had pulled through. But that he was still unconscious and needed a further transfusion. Charlie had sobbed in relief when she told him, he had begged her to get him to the hospital for the moment visiting hours started. So at 12 on the dot they approached the reception desk. “We are here to see Nick Nelson?” The nurse looked up and smiled at her before checking her computer. “Ok, he’s got 3 visitors at the moment which is the maximum allowed on this unit so I’ll just pop in and let his mum know you are here.” Jane thanked her and they sat down to wait. Charlie’s legs were bouncing with nerves. He was so desperate to see him. To tell him he loved him. They looked over to where the nurse was coming back, followed by David and Nick’s Auntie. “Hi Charlie,” she gave him a hug then turned and introduced herself to Jane. David mumbled a hi. “We are going to head home for some lunch and to let Nellie out. Give you some time with him.”

Charlie gave her a small smile. “Thanks,” he whispered. They followed the nurse to Nicks room and Charlie opened the door. He closed his eyes for a moment to try to prepare himself, then stepped through.

“Hello love, hi Jane,” Sarah hugged them both. Jane took one look at Nick and her face paled. She hadn’t seen him since he’d been admitted and it broke her heart. He didn’t look like Nick. It could have been anyone lying in that bed, his trademark hair peeking out from the bandage the only recognisable part of him. She took a moment, struggling to think of what to say for Sarah, who was going through something so unimaginable. Sarah looked at her. “I’m so sorry Sarah, I’m so so sorry.” As Jane hugged Sarah, Charlie walked to the side of the bed to Nick. “Hi babe,” he said softly, “I’m here.” The bruising on his face had darkened overnight. The oxygen mask was a new addition. He bent over to give him the lightest of kisses to his forehead and he felt him shift underneath him. “Babe? It’s me Charlie, can you hear me?”

Nick was woken from a horrible dream, he was drowning, weighted down. As he sank to the bottom of the sea he heard a voice, Charlie’s voice. It broke the nightmare and he gasped, letting out a moan. ‘Can you hear me?’ That was definitely Char. He opened his eyes a tiny amount. It was still far too bright in this room, wherever he was. He could make out a dark haired face above him. His eyes wouldn’t focus. It was still niggling at him, where was he, why was he here?

Charlie gasped as Nick tried to open his eyes to see him. “Sarah!” She quickly came over to him and took Nicks hand. “Hello Nicky, are you with us?” Nick nodded groggily, then groaned as a spasm of pain ripped through his torso. Why did it  hurt so much to just breathe in and out.

“Nick, I love you so much,” Charlie felt tears springing to his eyes. “I’m so sorry for what happened…..I should have stopped them…..” Nick scrunched his nose in confusion. Stopped who? He concentrated his mind back and suddenly was hit with an avalanche of memories. The walk to the bus stop, the chips, the gang of men, the slurs, then the pain and the fear. He remembered being kicked and punched over and over…..He felt his heart rate picking up as he remembered what had happened. He tried to take deep breaths to calm down but the pain in his ribs meant he couldn’t take a proper breath. The monitors beside him started to beep more quickly as his heart rate increased. “Nick!” Sarah took his face in her hands and lent over him. “You need to calm down baby. You are safe, I promise you are safe.” Charlie looked on in shock as the beeping seemed to get faster. Sarah pushed a button and a nurse appeared almost immediately. “It’s ok Nicholas, “ she spoke clearly and calmly. “I’m going to give him another minor sedative. He needs to rest.” She left and returned with a syringe which she injected into his IV. Nick felt his body relaxing into the pillow, his heart rate slowing. He locked eyes with Charlie, who had tears in his eyes. “Char,” he managed to croak. “Love….you” his eyes closed as drifted back off to sleep.

Sarah collapsed back in to the seat as the sedative that the nurse injected Nick with seemed to take effect as his eyes rolled closed again. His breathing had slowed down again.  The look of pure terror in her baby’s eyes. It broke Sarah’s heart to think that he was remembering the attack. He looked so scared.  He looked terrified. She let out a choked sob, Charlie reached out and squeezed her hand. It was horrible seeing Sarah like this, so broken, so drained. She was usually so cheerful and happy but how could she be cheerful and happy when her little boy was lay battered and bruised in an hospital bed.  It should never had happened. He seemed settled again though, for now.

Charlie sat down on the opposite of the bed, he gently took Nick’s hand in his, careful not to disturb him although the nurse had advised them that the drugs should keep Nick comfortable and sleeping for the remainder of the afternoon. His body has been through such a traumatic ordeal and needed to rest and heal.  “Just sleep now, babe..” Charlie spoke as he Stroked the back of Nick’s hand with his thumb.  Was this the way it was going to be from now on? Were he and Nick going to fear showing affection to each other in public again? Why? Because of homophobic animals? It just wasn’t fair.   Charlie sat for another while later before messaging his mum to come for him to take him home so he could sleep under Sarah’s instruction. He had only agreed when she had agreed to try and get her head down herself for a few hours.  Nick was going to be out of it for a while and even when he did come around again he’d probably be very groggy and disoriented, anyway. Charlie didn’t want to leave him but he knew Sarah was right. He wouldn’t be much use to Nick if he made himself ill.

Diane and David returned to the room a short time later. Diane handed Sarah another coffee, studying her face.  “Sarah you look exhausted.”  She commented as she sat down. Sipping her own drink as David collapsed back into the plastic seat, coffee in hand, not taking his eyes off his mobile phone.      “I am exhausted…” Sarah replied as she let go of Nick’s hand, accepting the hit beverage, taking a large sip, breathing in the strong caffeine.  “You need to go home-“  “I can’t leave Nick!” Sarah replied quickly. What a crazy suggestion. She couldn’t leave her son when he was like this.   “David and I are here.” Diane replied. “You need to sleep.”  “I’ll sleep when I know Nick is okay.” Sarah replied, stubbornly.   “Mum, Auntie Diane is right.” David sighed, looking up from his phone.  Sarah just sighed.  “It isn’t up for debate.” She replied firmly as she took another sip of her coffee. This would keep her going.  Diane just sighed. She knew how stubborn her sister could be,  but she didn’t want Sarah making herself unwell. She knew not to push things though.   “The police were back.” Sarah told them as she sat her coffee on the side. “When you were getting the drinks.” She told them. David looked up from his phone again.  “What did they say??” He asked. Hopefully it was positive news. Hopefully they had found the scumbags that had did this to Nick.    “They’ve managed to access the cctv on the road that the attack took place.” Sarah explained. “They’ve got a clear description of the men that did this!”   “They haven’t caught them yet?” David sighed, heavily.    “No, but they’re doing all they can.” Sarah assured him.  “Those mobsters will pay for they’ve done to Nicky…”

“Mum! It’s going to be like finding a needle in a haystack.” David scoffed.  “Do you know how many homophobic pricks there is in this town.”  Sarah narrowed her eyes as she looked at her eldest son.   “That’s very rich coming from you, David.” She said curtly, causing her son’s head to snap up. Diane watched curiously from the other wide of the bed, she held a breath. Where was this going?  The atmosphere in the room had m suddenly turned icy.  David frowned as he looked as his Mum. What was she getting at.  “What is that supposed to mean?”    Sarah scoffed as she shook her head.  “Don’t play dumb with me, David.” she snapped.  “I’m not going to pretend that it’s not nice to see you concerned about your brother but it shouldn’t take something like this to happen for you  act like you give a damn.”   “Mum..” David said quietly,. What exactly was she trying to say to him.   “Sarah.” Diane said, carefully, things were starting to take a heated turn. It wasn’t going for anyone, especially not Nick. He shouldn’t have to be exposed to his mother and brother arguing at his beside!

“No!” Sarah hit back.  She had to say what she was thinking. It was niggling at her brain and David just had to hear it.   “You’ve got a cheek to call anyone homophobic…” she spat, the words falling from her motion before she had a chance to stop and think.  David’s face paled.  “Nick was so terrified of telling you about Charlie. He was so scared of telling his older brother that he’s bisexual, that he hid it.” Sarah fumed, the words were spewing out. She just needed to get her point across.   “Then when you eventually found out, by snooping on him, may I mention…you acted so appallingly.”   David’s eyes were wide, his face pale, but he was listening. He was taking it in.   “You made him feel like he was doing something wrong, just by being himself. The language you used. That’s homophobia David!” She continued.  “You forced him to come out to your father for crying out loud!!! Nick wasn’t ready for that! He knew it! I knew it. Christ, you even knew it yourself, yet you made him say it anyway. For what? Your own personal thrill.”  Sarah couldn’t stop herself. The mix of exhaustion and devastation of what had happened to her youngest son, catching up with her.  “You’re not better that the men that did this!” She shouted, the words falling out her mouth before she had a chance to stop them.

“Sarah!!” Diane gasped, her eyes widening. Sarah didn’t mean that, she knew she didn’t mean it. She was just exhausted and distraught. Her emotions were all over the place. No wonder, anyone would be same in her shoes.  She glanced at her eldest nephew.  Yes, she didn’t approve of his treatment towards Nick, especially about his Bisexuality, but he didn’t deserve this. David wasn’t capable of anything as callous as this.

“David I…I’m sorry.” Sarah said, realisation hitting her of what she had just said.  “I didn’t mean that.” She said sincerely. David was lots of things, but he wasn’t a monster.  Sarah stood up and reached her arm out towards David, who took a step back.   “I…I just need some air.” He said quietly as he backed towards the door. He just needed to get out of the room for a bit. He needed some fresh air. He needed a cigarette.  The thing was…Sarah wasn’t wrong.  She was completely right. He had no right to call anyone homophobic, not after the way he had treated his brother recently. “David…” Sarah said, stepping towards him, tears in her eyes. She couldn’t believe she had just said that to her son.     “I’ll be back…I…I just need to step outside.” David replied before darting from the room.

Chapter Text

The door closed with a click. Diane looked at Sarah, who had her hands over her face and was quietly crying. She glanced over to check that Nick was still sleeping. The last thing he needed was to hear shouting around him. Thankfully he was still out, the sedative still working in his system. She walked tentatively over to Sarah and put her arms out for a hug. Her older sister fell into them, “I can’t believe said that. What was I thinking?” She sobbed, “I’m the worst mother in the world, to accuse him of being like those monsters.” Diane rubbed her back, trying to soothe her. “You are an amazing mother. You are what I aspire to be like with the twins every single day. I won’t let you put yourself down.” Sarah looked up at her. “But no, David didn’t deserve that. Parts of it, yes. But we all say things we don’t mean when we are stressed. Go find him. I’ll sit with Nick.” Sarah nodded and rubbed the tears from her face.

David was leaning against the wall of the hospital, cigarette in hand. He was still reeling from his mum’s words. She was right. He was no better than them. He’d never got into a fight or hit anyone, but he had treated Nick like absolute shit the last few years. He took a shuddering breath and squeezed his eyes shut to stop himself from crying. But a few tears escaped anyway and he angrily brushed them away.

“David?” His eyes snapped open to see his mum stood a couple of steps away. She looked completely exhausted and devastated. “David, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it. I don’t know why I said it, I’m just so angry, and worried and…..”

“It’s ok,” David stopped her. “ I get it. I treated Nick so badly. I deserved what you said.”

“NO, David you are not like them. Please don’t think I believe that. I wish I could take it back.” David didn’t want to add to his mums worries. She was already carrying too much emotion and looked on the verge of collapse. He knew deep down she didn’t think he was a monster, but she had told him some home truths that were hard to swallow.

“I know you didn’t mum,” he chucked his cigarette on the ground and stamped it out. He pulled her into a hug. “But I’m going to do better. I’m going to make it right with Nick.” He looked at her with determined eyes. She smiled softly at him.

“I really am sorry baby, it’s been such a difficult day.” He put his arm around her and they headed back up to Nick’s room. He wouldn’t forget the words his mum had said, he was going to change. Make her proud of him like she always seemed to be of Nick.

Evening came. Nick still slept on under the sedative. The hospital agreed that Sarah could stay overnight and they set up a reclining chair in the room for her, along with a blanket and a pillow. She was so grateful to them for letting her stay with him. When he woke up he was going to be so confused and scared and it was vital he wasn’t alone.

It was almost midnight when Sarah was woken. Nick was whimpering quietly, his eyes screwed shut, like he was having a dream - or a nightmare. She quickly sat up and took his hand. “Nicky, I’m here darling it’s ok.”

Nick was back on the pavement, on the floor. He could feel the kicks and punches. He tried to get to Charlie but something was pushing him down into the floor. He was so scared. Charlie was screaming at them to stop. His hair was being pulled up and then there was a terrifying pain in his chest….he couldnt move…..he was going to die…..

“Nick!” He heard a voice coming through, disturbing his nightmare. “Nicky, it’s ok, wake up sweetheart.” He slowly opened his eyes. There was his mum, looking down at him with so much care and compassion. “There you are baby, you are safe. I promise, it’s over.”

Nick’s eyes darted around, trying to take in where he was. He remembered now. The attack, those horrible men. He hurt everywhere, especially his chest and head. He tried to talk but his voice was croaky. “It’s ok, don’t try to talk.” His mum soothed. “Are you in pain darling?” He nodded slowly. “Ok, sit tight, I’ll get the nurse. “ she pressed the call button and the nurse arrived quickly. “Ah Nick, you are awake!” He blinked at her then nodded slowly. “I’ll just do a few quick obs and then we can sort out some pain relief. It’s good to have you back.” She bustled around, performing checks. “I’m going to replace his face mask with some nasal oxygen. He’ll be much more comfortable.” She spoke to Sarah each time she performed a check on Nick. “All looks good, I’ll pop and get some pan relief.” She disappeared and Sarah’s focus turned back to Nick who was watching her, his face wrinkled in pain. “Mum,” he croaked out. “Everything hurts,” Sarah’s heart broke at his words. “I know sweetheart. Do you remember what happened?”

Nick nodded again, “most of it. I remember being on the ground….them kicking me and hitting me, I tried to stop them mum but there were 3 of them…..” tears sprang to his eyes and fell down his bruised cheeks. “Then I remember a pain in my chest….then nothing.” Sarah choked back a sob as she listened. “What happened?” He looked at her. She didn’t want to tell him yet, he’d only just woken up. But she couldn’t lie to him.

She took his hand in hers and stroked it gently. “One of the men who attacked you….he had a knife.” Nicks eyes widened. “He stabbed me?” She nodded at him. “I’m so sorry baby.” Nicks closed his eyes for a moment, trying to take this in. This was something that happened on the news. To someone random in London. Not something that happened in his town on a Sunday night on the way home from the chippy.

“But I’m going to be ok?” He looked at her pleadingly. She smoothed his creased forehead with her hand. “You are darling. You have had a couple of surgeries. But it’s all ok now.”

“What surgeries?” He whispered. His head was hurting so much and he felt a bit sick but he needed to know.

“The blade went into your lung. The doctors took you to theatre to repair it. Then…..you started bleeding internally so you had to go back in.” She paused and took a breath, “They took out your spleen……”

“Oh my god.” This was too much for Nick to process. Too much information. “Is Charlie ok? Did they hurt him? I tried to protect him mum…..I just couldn’t.” Sarah smiled at him softly. “He’s fine darling. Not hurt, but so worried about you. He’ll be thrilled you have woken up.”

“Can I see him? I need to know he’s ok.”

“He’ll be here tomorrow sweetheart. It’s the middle of the night.” Sarah wished she could bring Charlie to him but there was no way it would be allowed.

“Oh.” Nick sank back into his pillow. He was worn out from the conversation.

Sarah reached out and smoothed Nick’s hair out, being careful of the dressing that was covering the stitches to the wound on his forehead.   “Was I sleeping long?” Nick asked.  “You’ve slept all day darling.” Sarah told him as she held his hand. “You’ve been on some really strong pain medicine.” She explained.   “Isn’t helping much.” Nick mumbled as he let out a painful sigh. He’d never felt pain like this before.  “The morphine should kick in again soon, sweetheart.” Sarah picked up the water jug from side. “Do you want a drink, sweetheart?” She asked softly as she tipped some water in to a little paper cup.  Nick nodded his head softly. His throat felt like sandpaper. He was so so dry. Sarah popped a little straw in the cup and held it to Nick’s lips.  “Small sips, darling.” She instructed.  Nick sipped the water, feeling the cold liquid slide down his throat. He winced as the straw brushed against a cut on his lip. Everything hurt, he couldn’t move without his body screaming out in pain. He had a few sips of water before pulling his head away having had enough. He was ever so sleepy. He hated feeling so tired. He was terrified of closing his eyes again incase his mind was plagued with flashbacks of the assault again.  Sarah stifled a yawn as she glanced at her watch. It was almost midnight. It was only slightly over 24 hours since Nick had been rushed in to hospital. The worst 24 hours of her life. Watching her child being rushed in resus, bloodied and battered.  Hearing detailed descriptions of what those evil, cowardly men did to him, the injuries they had inflicted on him. If that wasn’t bad enough. She had to sit through the agonising wait as her baby underwent not one, but two operations.  “Your brother and auntie were here” Sarah told him softly as she smoothed out his hair again.  Nick looked up at her. David was here? Why? Surely he had better things to do.  He wished he had been awake to see his Auntie Diane though. “They’ll be back to see you tomorrow, darling.” Sarah soothed.

Nick glanced at his mum. There was one name that she didn’t mention. “Does dad know?” He asked quietly. Sarah sighed. This was a touchy subject. Stephane was always a touchy subject. Sarah wasn’t about to lie or make excuses for her ex husband though. No way!  “I have called your father numerous times, baby.” She explained. “He knows what’s happened. I have left countless voicemails.”  Nick let out a heavy sigh and then winced as it ached his sore ribs. Everything ached. Even just breathing caused him so much pain. “He’s not called back?” he asked. He didn’t know why he sounded so deflated.  This was what his dad did. He should be well used to it by now. The constant no shows. The constant disappointment, but surely his dad would want to visit him. Especially seeing as he’s had multiple surgeries/procedures.  “I’m sorry baby.” Sarah sighed as she reached out to stroke his cheek.  “I’m sure he’s just tied up with work…he will call soon…” she didn’t hold out much hope, but maybe Stéphane would surprise her. Maybe he still had some common decency left. Never say never and all.

Why don’t you go back to sleep, eh?”  Nick sighed. He didn’t want to close his eyes. He was scared, but he couldn’t also feel his eyes growing heavy again as sleep was calling him once again. He hated feeling so weak and tired. Sarah could sense his anxiousness. She wasn’t his mother for nothing.  “You don’t have to be scared, sweetheart.” She cooed.  “You’re safe here. I promise.” She assured him as she squeezed his hand. “Nobody’s going to hurt you, okay??” She promised him if only she could have protected him from this happening in the first place.  “I’ll be right here when you wake up again.” She told him as his eyes began to close again as sleep claimed his body once more.  She arranged the blankets, smoothing them so that he was comfortable and warm before relaxing back against her recliner chair. She wrapped the blanket around herself, allowing her eyes to close. Knowing Nick was asleep and comfortable. She allowed herself to fall in to a much needed sleep.

Sarah was awoken bright and early by the light shining through the window of the hospital room and the birds chirping outside. She yawned and stretched, before rubbing her eyes and glancing at her watch.  7:45am. She suddenly panicked, realising she had been asleep for so long. She had only meant to doze for an hour or two.  She immediately glanced over at Nick but was relieved to see he was still sleeping soundly, his face was relaxed. The bruising looked harsher this morning. The nurse had warned her that it would probably get worse over the coming days, more prominent. His cheek bone was bruised. He had two black eyes, bruising at the side of his head, his chin was bruised and he had numerous cuts on his face, presumably by being punched in the face by someone who was wearing rings.  His lip was cut and his forehead had needed stitches. Sarah felt herself well up every time she looked at Nick’s face. It was just so wrong that her son had been caught up in such a cruel, needless, homophobic attack. Sarah was pulled out of her thoughts by the door opening and Beth walking in. She smiled warmly as she handed over Sarah a steaming mug of tea, not just the tiny paper cups from the hospital canteen, but in a proper mug.  “Morning Sarah.” She smiled as she did some checks on the monitors.  “Sleep well?” She asked kindly.  “I did, thank you.” Sarah replied as she sipped her tea. It was made to perfection.  “Rise and shine, Nicholas.” The nurse sung as she secured a blood pressure cuff on Nick’s arm that wasn’t in plaster.  Nick let out a groan and made no effort to open his eyes. Sarah let out a soft chuckle.  “The struggle I have getting him up for school every morning..”  Beth laughed in response. “Oh I understand you.” She nodded. “I have a 12 year old son myself and he’s exactly the same.”   Sarah smiled softly as she reached out and squeezed Nick’s hand. “Nicky?”

Nick groaned. “ I’m awake….” He heard his mums soft chuckle and the voice of someone he didn’t recognise - he was guessing it was a doctor or nurse. He slowly opened his eyes, blinking at the harsh light. He was still so so sore. He turned his head to his mum, “ hi,” he mumbled. He went to rub his eyes with his hands but was immediately stopped by the jarring pain that ran through his body. He let out a small moan. “I know,” his mum was holding his arm gently. “ just try to stay still. You’ve got a lot of healing to do.”

Beth carried on with her checks, “sorry Nick, I just need to take a look at your stomach, see how you are healing up.” He gave her a small nod and tried to keep as still as he could as she lifted up his gown. He glanced down to see what his torso looked like and couldn’t help the gasp that came from him. There were two large pieces of medical gauze taped to him, one on his chest and the other on his stomach. His entire middle was bruised and swollen. He turned his head to his mum. He didn’t want to watch this bit. He could see from her face that she was trying to keep calm for his sake. But she was obviously fighting back tears as she looked at the mess that was his stomach. He closed his eyes as Beth gently removed the gauze and checked each wound carefully before replacing the bandages. “It’s looking ok, a bit red and angry but that’s to be expected.” She covered him back up. Sarah squeezed his hand, “All done baby, you did really well.” He tried to give her a smile but winced as the cut on his lip pulled.

Beth adjusted his bed so he was sitting up slightly more then took off her gloves and tossed them in the waste bin.  “Right, Let’s get some breakfast in you. Do you think you can manage some toast?” Nick gave her a worried look. He really wasn’t even a little bit hungry. “I know, but we have to start trying to get your strength back up. Is there anything you think you could eat?”

Nick thought, “maybe something soft like a yogurt? I think it’s going to hurt to chew.” Beth gave him a sympathetic smile. “Yogurt it is. I’ll be back in a bit. You can have some more pain relief now too if you like?” He nodded at her.

“Did you sleep well darling?” His mum asked him as the nurse left. Nick sighed softly, careful not to anger his ribs. “Yeah, I think the pain killers knocked me out.” Sarah smiled at him. “What day is it?” Everything was so blurred, he wasn’t sure how long he’d been here. “It’s Tuesday morning baby, you have been here since Sunday night.” Nicks swallowed as he absorbed that information. “Is Charlie coming today?” He really wanted to see him when he was awake.

“I’ll message Jane and find out if he’s going to school today.”  Sarah began messaging on her phone, then popped it down on the tray table.

“Where’s my phone?” Nick realised he had no idea where it was. He suddenly felt his blood run cold as he realised something. “Mum, does everybody know what happened to me?” His eyes widened, he didn’t want to be the talk of the school, everyone gossiping or laughing about him.

“Charlie has told your friends, I don’t know if the news has got out. Don’t worry about that for now baby, let’s just concentrate on getting you healed up and better.” She leaned over and hugged him so gently. “I have your phone in my bag. The paramedics gave it to Charlie, and he passed it on to me.”

“Can I have it? I want to text Charlie. And our friends.” Sarah hesitated. She wasn’t stupid. She knew that word would most definitely have gotten out about Nick and his phone was most likely full of messages. She didn’t want him to have to worry about that just yet. “The doctor said to avoid screens for a bit, you have a nasty head injury baby.” Nick sighed. “Ok, but can you text Charlie for me? Tell him I want to see him?”

Sarah smiled. “Let’s see what Jane comes back with, then I will.” Nick slumped back against his pillow.

Beth appeared with some yogurt and juice for him. His mum tried to help him sit up but the pain that sliced through his abdomen caused him to cry. “ Shit….” He hissed. He tried to control his breathing, short shallow breaths so his ribs didn’t hurt.

“Oh baby, “ Sarah rubbed his hand, “I’m sorry.” Her heart broke seeing him in so much pain.

“It’s fine,” he grimaced. “I don’t think I can sit up properly though.” He felt so useless. He couldn’t sit up, eating was going to be really difficult. He couldn’t even lift his arms without groaning in pain.

“Let me help you sweetheart.” Sarah looked at him tenderly. He felt like he was two years old but eventually he nodded and Sarah opened the yogurt. Slowly, she helped him to eat a few spoons. She could see he felt completely humiliated about it. “It’ll be ok Nick, just give it some time.” After a couple more spoons, he turned his head away and closed his eyes. “I’m tired.” He said. Sarah wasn’t sure she believed him but she didn’t push. “Ok darling. You just rest.”

Jane looked at the message from Sarah, asking if Charlie was able to come and visit today. She had hoped to get Charlie back to school this morning, but he’d had a bad night. She had rushed into his room hearing him shouting out in his sleep. He was twisted in his bedding, forehead covered in sweat as he mumbled and shouted for Nick. She’d gently woken him up and let him cry in her arms. Another day at home wouldn’t hurt him. She replied to let Sarah know they’d be there at 12 again. She made herself a cup of tea, putting enough water in the kettle for the rest of the Springs as they all started getting up and ready for work and school. She made a cup for Charlie and carefully took it upstairs to his room. She knocked softly and went in. He was awake, scrolling on his phone.

“Charlie darling, I made you some tea.” He looked up from his phone and nodded. “thanks. Any news?” He’d been constantly refreshing his chat with Nick in the hopes he’d hear from him, but nothing. His phone had been blowing up with messages from friends…..and from complete strangers. Ghouls who just wanted to know all the gory details. He’d ignored those ones. He’d made sure to let the Paris squad and rugby lads know that the surgery had gone well, but he hadn’t replied since then.

“Nicks awake and asking for you. Sarah was hoping you could visit today?”

Charlie looked up at her wide eyed, “I don’t have to go to school?”

Jane smiled at him gently, “I think this is more important than school. And you are exhausted from last night. I’ll call you in again.”

Charlie couldn’t wait to get to the hospital, he just needed to see Nick. He quickly had a shower and put on some clothes. He couldn’t believe his mum was allowing him to skip school in order to go visit Nick in the hospital, but she knew how important it was for Charlie to see Nick. 

They arrived at the hospital just after noon. They took the elevator up towards the HDU after stopping off at the hospital cafe first to pick up a coffee for Sarah. She’d probably need it.  Sarah had mentioned on the phone that all things going well. Nick would be well enough to be moved to a regular ward sign. They just had to get his strength up a bit more and get the pain he was un under control. Charlie was desperate to see Nick. Jane was a little hesitant to be honest. She had gotten such a fright when she had first seen Nick. It had only been a couple of hours after his operation to remove his spleen. He had still been asleep, heavily sedated on the drugs they had given him but the state of his face had devastated her. It was disgusting and so upsetting to think that someone had deliberately done this to Nick. They had viciously beaten him, for no reason whatsoever other than the fact that he was holding his boyfriend’s hand. In one sense she was relieved that it wasn’t her own son who lay broken and battered in a hospital bed, but this should never have happened. Nick was the sweetest, most gentle boy. He’d never hurt a fly. He would do absolutely anything for Charlie. This was so wrong.  

Jane and Charlie arrived outside Nick’s room. Jane could see how much Charlie was itching to get inside to see Nick. She gently knocked on the door, incase the other teenager was asleep. She was glad she did as she noticed he was very much asleep as they entered the room. Sarah remained in the same position she had been in yesterday. Her eyes fixated on her child as he slept. Her head snapped up as she noticed the door opening and closing, She smiled at Jane and Charlie. “We brought you a coffee..” Jane whispered as she placed it on the table next to the bed. She couldn’t help her eyes falling on Nick’s face. Those bastards really did a number on him. The bruising definitely looked a lot worse since she last seen him. It was more prominent. Blue and purple swirls all over his face. His face was bruised and battered but also cut in several places. Both his eyes were black. His nose slightly swollen and the cut to his lip looked painful.  That poor boy had been through hell. It wasn’t fair.  Sarah smiled gratefully at Jane as she picked the coffee up and took a sip, the caffeine hitting her instantly.  “Thank you.” She said before placing it down. “Nicky’s not been sleeping very long.” She told him. “He ws awake and talking but he’s still very tired. The painkillers he’s on makes him very sleepy.”    Charlie glanced at his sleeping boyfriend. He couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed that Nick was sleeping. He knew his boyfriend needed all the rest he could get but he just wanted to talk to him.   “Did he say much when he was awake earlier?” Charlie asked Sarah.   “He kept asking after you, my love.” Sarah smiled at him warmly. Charlie felt his heart flutter. That was so Nick.   “He’s still in a lot of pain.” Sarah sighed. “He’s on a lot of medication. He managed to eat half a pot of yoghurt.”It was a tiny accomplishment but it was one more baby step in the right direction. 

Charlie sat down on the chair at the left side of Nick’s bed. He still couldn’t believe this had happened. It should never of happened at all. They were on a date, a simple innocent date. It should never had ended like this.  The police had to catch the evil monsters that done this. They had to lock them away so that they could never do this to anyone else again. Charlie carefully told hold of Nick’s hand being so gentle, as much as he wanted to speak to Nick, he didn’t want to wake him up.  Sarah and Jane fell in to their own quiet chatter as Charlie just sat, half listening, his focus fully on his boyfriend.  

Nick stirred. He could hear quiet chatter around him. The voices were fuzzy as he came around properly. He blinked his eyes open, feeling someone holding his hand. He just assumed it was his mum. Until he noticed her sat on his right side, talking quietly to Charlie’s mum. Why was she here? He noticed that Sarah very much wasn’t holding his hand, so who was?? that could only mean one thing. Nick rolled his head to his left side. Charlie! Charlie was here.  Charlie instantly noticed Nicks brown eyes, wide open and gazing up at him.  “Hi…” he breathed out as he stroked Nick’s cheek with his thumb.  “Hi…” Nick replied.  He couldn’t believe Charlie was here.  “Char…” Nick smiled reaching out for his boyfriend’s hand.   Sarah glanced over at her son, hearing his voice.   “Sleep well Nicky?” She asked. Nick just hummed in response, far too besotted with the fact that his boyfriend was in the room.  He gripped Charlie’s had with his unbroken on and gave it a tight squeeze.  “They didn’t hurt you, did they?” He asked, desperate for Charlie’s confirmation that the men didn’t harm him.  “Please tell me they didn’t hurt you.” He sniffed.  He couldn’t bare it. Charlie squeezed Nick’s hand back.  “They didn’t hurt me, Nick. I promise.” He soothed.  Nick let out a relieved breath as if he had been holding it in forever.  “Thank god.”   “They hurt you though.” Charlie whispered as he reached out and trailed his finger along Nick’s bruised jawline.  “Just look what they’ve done to you.” He choked out, struggling to keep his emotions in check. It angered him what those animals had done to his beautiful boyfriend.  “I…I haven’t seen my face yet.” Nick said quietly. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to.  Sarah paled from her chair. She didn’t think that was a very good idea. Nick’s face was a mess. They’d hurt her baby so badly. “I don’t think I want to.” Nick said. “Just yet.”  Sarah breathed out a sigh of relief.  Nick tried to pull himself up the bed so he was sitting upright a little. Big mistake as pain rifled through his body causing him to cry out in agony.   “Easy, baby.” Sarah soothed standing up immediately and gently pushing Nick back down against the pillows. It broke Charlie’s heart seeing him in so much pain.  “Remember you can’t move too much, darling.” Sarah reminded her as she used the bed panels to raise nick’s bed ever so slightly.  Nick sighed he couldn’t do anything without hurting.  

Charlie and Nick chatted for ages about everything and anything. The nurse delivered Nick’s lunch, a bowl of soup which he managed half of. He even allowed Charlie to spoon feed him this time. He didn’t feel half as humiliated as letting his mum do it. Charlie caught Nick up on what he was missing from the Paris squad chat and that all his friends were so upset that this had happened and that they have all been so worried about him. Nick enjoyed just listening to Charlie, he felt himself growing tired but having his boyfriend here was more important that sleep. He was fed up of sleeping.  

It was nearing 3pm when there was a knock on the door. Nick glanced up. Who could that be? His mum was here. Charlie and Jane were here.  David wasn’t coming until much later, according to Sarah which was part of the reason Nick was forcing himself to stay awake right now, so he could nap later through the entirety of his brothers visit. Sarah hadn’t mentioned Aunite Diane or Uncle Rich visiting again. He frowned. He was out of options. He watched as the door opened and there stood was the person he least expected to be.  His dad. 

Stéphane was the last person Nick had expected to see standing in the doorway of his room. He had slowly began processing and realising that his father probably, most definitely wasn’t going to come but of course his dad was always there throwing spanners in the works as usual.  “Nicholas.” 

Nick couldn’t believe he was here. Should he feel happy? Happy that he was here, happy that he had pulled himself away from his work, eventually. Should he feel annoyed? Frustrated?  It had taken Stéphane almost 3 days to come. Sarah had let him know immediately after Nick had been admitted in to hospital. He was here, though. His dad was here.   He had got on a flight and flown over from France to be here. 

Stéphane stepped in to the room, he greeted Charlie with a handshake and Sarah and Jane with a hug. Nobody commented on the awkward atmosphere his presence brought to the room, it was definitely felt though.  The last time Nick had seen his father was the disaster dinner party at the beginning of summer. More than 4 months ago.  He was lucky if he’d received more that 3 messages from him, either.  Sarah was glad Stéphane was here. Yes, slightly annoyed that it had taken him so long. His son had been battered and beaten, rushed to hospital where he required multiple surgeries. That alone is enough to make any parent immediately drop what they’re doing and rush to be by their child’s side in a matter of urgency, but he was here.    Sarah stood up, she glanced down at the Nick before turning to Jane and glancing in between her and Charlie.  “Why don’t we go get a drink? I could really do with stretching my legs.” She said.  Jane nodded as she stood up. She could go a coffee, herself but she knew the real reason was that Sarah wanted to give Nick some space with his father.   Leave them alone for a bit to talk and catch up.   She bent down and kissed Nick’s bruised cheek carefully. “I’ll be back soon, sweetheart.”  She told him.  Jane put her hand on Charlie’s shoulder as to guide him towards the door.   “Char? Can you stay?” Nick asked, turning his head towards his boyfriend, his eyes wide and pleading.  “Please?”   Charlie immediately reached out and took Nick’s hand in his.  “Of course, love…” he assured him as he squeezed his boyfriend’s hand. If Nick wanted him to stay whilst he talked to his dad then he would stay.  Jane squeezed Charlie’s shoulder before following Sarah out the door. She could see Sarah whispering something to her ex husband as she walked past.  She couldn’t really hear what was said but could tell by Sarah’s expression and tone that it was some sort of warning.   

Stéphane stepped further towards the bed. Finally getting a closer look at his son’s injuries. His eyes grew wide as he took in his son’s battered and bruised face. The stitches to his forehead. The plaster cast on his broken hand, the cuts, the bruises, the wires & tubes.  This was not what it was expecting. He knew his youngest son had been beaten up, but he hadn’t been expecting this extent.  “Nicholas? What happened?”  

Nick glanced at his father. Didn’t he know? Hadn’t Sarah told him what had happened? She said that she had and he believed her so why was his dad asking.   “Didn’t mum tell you?” Nick asked. He didn’t really feel like going in to detail about his attack. It was still very raw to him. He didn’t feel very much like talking about it.     “Who did this? Why?” Stéphane asked, struggling to understand why someone would hurt his boy like this. Nick was a gentle boy. He didn’t have any enemies, not that it was aware of. Nick wasn’t a fighter. He could never remember Nick getting in to fights at school when he was younger. That was always David.    Nick raised his eyebrow and frowned.   “We were attacked….” He said slowly.  “We were attacked because we were holding hands.”   He said firmly. He felt the need to address to his father that this was an unprovoked, homophobic attack. 

He heard Stéphane scoff and felt his blood run cold.   “Oh come on, Nicholas. There has to be a reason.” Stéphane said.  “Did you say something to provoke them, to rile them up?”     Charlie felt his body go rigid as he began to feel himself grow angry. Was Stéphane seriously implying that they had asked for this to happen? Why would they ask to be victims of a homophobic attack.    Nick’s eyes grew wide. Was his father seriously thinking that he had asked for this?  That he deserved it.    “They targeted us….because I was holding Charlie’s hand.” He repeated.  “I was holding my boyfriend’s hand and they didn’t like it.”    

 “In public?” Stéphane was quick to ask.  Nick’s body went numb. He swallowed to rid the lump that had formed in his throat.   “Yes in public.” He replied with a frown.  “I’m bisexual dad…I have nothing to hide.”    Stéphane sighed.  “Maybe it’s not the smartest idea to flaunt what you are around so openly?”     

Nick’s eyes flew open.  “Flaunt what I am?” He scoffed.  “You can’t even say the words!”    He snapped. All the anger that had been building up inside of him since he came out to his dad at the dinner party were finally reaching surface point.  His dad was ashamed of him. No matter how hard he tried to disguise the fact.   “I am bisexual, dad…”.   Stéphane pulled a face that infuriated Charlie.  He couldn’t believe Nick’s father was behaving this way, well he could believe it as he knew what he was like, but this was completely not okay.   “Are you sure about that, Nicholas?” Stéphane replied.  “Because I’m not entirely sure that you are…”  Nick’s face turned like thunder. Was his dad actually implying that he was confused about his sexuality. That he wasn’t sure if he was bisexual. He was entirely positive. He knew who he was. He knew his sexuality and he knew that he loved Charlie with all his existence.     “Oh I am completely sure…” Nick spat back sourly.  “I figured that out on my own with the support of Charlie, my friends and mum….you weren’t there you don’t really get to have an opinion.”    Stéphane sighed. “Don’t get worked up, Nick.”   Nick exhaled a heavy breath.  Don’t get worked up? Don’t get worked up! How could he just stand there and say that after pretty much implying that Nick had brought this on himself. That because he was openly displaying his affection for his boyfriend in public that he deserved all that he got. He deserved to be kicked and punched, spat on and homophobia abuse hurled at him.  Stéphane just having that mindset on the situation made him homophobic.   

“I’m sorry Nick, I don’t think I can handle this.” Stéphane spoke in French to his youngest son.  Nick’s eyes darkened as he looked at his son.  “You can’t handle it??” He snapped. He knew his dad’s plot, speak in French so that the Charlie couldn’t hear what was being said. Wouldn’t know what he was saying. So he spoke in English. He knew his dad would be annoyed, he remembered being told as a child to always speak to his father in French. But he didn’t have to listen to his dad? He wasn’t behaving much like a dad.   “You can’t handle this???” He snapped. “You can’t handle it!”  He was getting angrier by the second, he could feel the tears threatening to fall, but he refused to cry in front of his father. His voice imbedded in Nick’s brain from when he was younger and he would display the slightest bit of emotion.   Boys don’t cry, Nicholas.    Boys do cry and they should do every once in a while.    “I was the one who was attacked!” He exclaimed. “I was beaten up and stabbed all because I was holding my wonderful boyfriend’s hand. We were targeted by homophobic pricks that for some pathetic sad reason believe that we shouldn’t exist? Why? Because we’re both boys and we love each other? That should never even come in to it…” Nick breathed in and out. His ribs ached, his chest was tight but he had to get this out. His dad had to hear this, whether he listened or took note was another thing but Nick had to say it.   “You’re no better, do you know what?” He snapped.   “That’s not fair, Nick.” Stéphane replied as he adapted an English accent again. “No!!”

Nick snapped.  “I’ll tell you what isn’t fair. The fact that people like Charlie and I and our friends have to hide who we really are because there’s so many small minded people in the world, people like you!” Nick blinked as the tears streamed down his face. He couldn’t help it, he was just so angry.    “It’s not fair that I can’t rely on my own dad to be supportive.  To protect me from things like this happening, but you know what? I don’t care anymore. I don’t need you. I don’t want you in my life. You don’t get to just rock up here and act like the concerned parent when I haven’t seen you in what? Nearly 5 months!!!”  He tried to calm himself down but everything he was saying. He had been wanting to say for years. He’d just never had the confidence again.   “Nicholas…”  “No! For years I have wondered what I had done wrong? Why you’d want to move to Paris and have nothing to do with us? Do you have any idea how that feels to a 7 year old kid.”  Nick sighed.  “No you wouldn’t. Because you’re selfish and you don’t care…”  “You visited in the summer.” Stéhane replied.  Nick scoffed and let out a sarcastic laugh.  “We stayed with your parents, we’d be lucky if we seen you more than a few times on those visits.  You married Martine when I was 13! 4 years dad. 4 years!!!! I have a stepmother that I’ve never met before. That’s not normal, but then again nothing about our relationship is normal. I don’t care anymore…I am done questioning myself. I am done wishing you gave a damn. I like myself. I love my life.  I have the best boyfriend imaginable, I have amazing friends and I have mum. Who has been both mum and dad for years. I’ve never had to want for anything with her. I….i think you should go…” he said as he collapsed against the pillows, holding on to his side. It hurt to breathe. He knew he had over exerted himself but he didn’t regret a word that was said.   

“Nick…” Stéphane tried. Nick just shook his head as he allowed more tears to trickle down his cheeks, his lip wobbling. Charlie gripped on to his hand, squeezing it tightly. He was so proud of Nick. He had said what he’d probably needed to say to his dad for the longest time.   “I want to do better, I do.”    Nick just shook his head.  “I’ve heard it before. I don’t believe you anymore. I’m sick and tired hoping that the next time I see you would be the time you actually take an interest in me, in my life…” he sighed. “But you don’t so I’m done. Please leave.”   Stéphane made no effort to leave.  “GO! Fuck off!” Nick spat growing frustrated again. “Nicholas.” He said in French again.   Charlie spun around. “He wants you to leave!!” He spat. He refused to allow this man to upset his boyfriend anymore. “So go!!”   Stéphane had no choice as he let out a heavy defected sigh as he moved towards the door, he hesitated before looking over his shoulder at his son once more before disappearing out the door.  Nick wasted no time in letting out a choked sob. Charlie jumped into action, reaching his arms out and allowing his boyfriend to collapse against him as his body was overtaken by gut wrenching sobs. Charlie held him, whispering words of comfort and kissing his hair softly.  

Sarah and Jane returned to his room, bringing a coke for Charlie. Sarah peered cautiously round the door. She had warned Stephane not to upset Nick, not,to comment on how his face looked. She dearly hoped he’d listened. Her heart sank as she took in the sight in front of her. Nick was sobbing into Charlie’s chest. Tears pouring down his bruised cheeks. Charlie was whispering words of comfort and gently stroking his hair. Stephane was nowhere to be seen.

“Baby, what happened?” She was instantly at his side, Charlie moved out of the way. He knew Nick needed his mum right now. Nick tried to get the words out but he couldn’t stop sobbing. His ribs were screaming in pain. His head was pounding. He felt close to passing out, he couldn’t get enough oxygen in. The monitors beside him started to beep more quickly. Sarah could see he was having a panic attack. “Shhh….my darling, just breathe nice and slow….” She hugged him close, gently rubbing her hand down his back until she felt him begin to calm. “That’s it, nice and slowly….” She glanced over to Charlie with raised eyebrows,  “what happened?”

Charlie looked up at the ceiling, trying to think how to word this. He couldn’t believe what he had just heard. “Um, Stephane kept asking Nick if he’d done something to provoke it. He sort of indicated we shouldn’t have been holding hands in public. He um said he didn’t think Nick was bi….then he said something in French about not being able to handle this….” Charlie paused. What kind of father was he? He didn’t ask how he was feeling, hug him, anything….

Sarah was seething. “I cannot believe it. I’m so sorry baby. I should have stayed with you.”

“It’s fine,” Nicks voice was hoarse and quiet as he struggled to get the words out. “I told him I didn’t want to see him again.” His bottom lip wobbled.

Just then they were interrupted by a nurse. “Just checking in, Nicks vitals spiked. All ok in here?” He took in Nicks tear stained cheeks, the exhausted look on his face. “Nick had a visit from his dad. He er, he upset him quite a lot. I think he had a bit of a panic attack.”

The nurse looked at them sympathetically.  “It’s important that Nick here remains calm. He could burst his stitches if he gets riled up.” He checked the monitors and had a quick look under Nicks gown to check the stitches were still in tact. Charlie gasped at the sight of Nick’s battered and bandaged torso. He reached over to Nick and held his hand. “I’m going to give him some more pain relief and something to calm him down. He’s exhausted and he needs to rest.” Nicks closed his eyes. He did feel exhausted, physically and mentally. He kept replaying his dad’s words over and over in his mind. Why did he have to have such a crap excuse for a dad. It wasn’t fair. He felt more tears falling down his sore cheeks and the gentle touch of his mum wiping them away. The nurse fiddled with his IV and he felt himself sinking back into a peaceful slumber. He didn’t even have the energy to fight it.

Jane put her hand on Charlie’s shoulder. “You ok Charlie?” He nodded at her. “I just can’t believe his dad would say those things. Nick looked devastated.” He let his mum hug him as he watched Nick sleep. He looked calm which was a relief.

Sarah was gazing at Nick, stroking his hair and cheek. “Well he won’t be coming back in. I’m going to speak to the reception desk. He’s not visiting again.” That waste of space ex husband of hers could rot in hell before she let him step foot in this hospital again.

Knowing that Nick would now most likely be asleep for the rest of the day, Charlie and Jane left. Sarah text Diane to let her know what had happened and to tell her and David to stay home as Nick needed to sleep. She resumed her vigil beside the bed, desperately hoping that Nick would sleep through till the morning.

Nick woke with a jolt. Instantly feeling his ribs and stomach protesting at the sudden movement. Hed slept for hours. It was getting light outside. He glanced over to his mum who was once again sleeping in the reclining chair next to him. He felt himself well up as he looked over at her. She was the most amazing mum. She would do anything for him. He thought back to his dad’s visit. The cruel words and the look on his face. He didn’t need him. He had her. That was enough. He felt a little less groggy today. His head still throbbed but less so. “Mum?” He whispered. Her eyes snapped open and she looked at him in concern. “You ok Nicky?” He nodded at her, “could I have a drink?” She immediately poured him some water and helped him drink. “ you like a little brighter today darling,” she smiled at him.

“Yeah I think I am. Still hurts everywhere but my brain seems a little less fuzzy.” He smiled at her. Sarah beamed back at him, she was so relieved. She glanced at her watch, realising he had slept for about 12 hours. “I’ll let the nurse know you are awake baby, they were talking last night about moving you to a normal ward.” She left the room to go and fetch someone. Nick considered what she had said. A normal ward….would he have to share with other people? They’d have to see him looking like this. He still hadn’t seen himself, but he’d seen the reaction on other people’s faces when they spoke to him. He knew he looked awful. He could feel that his face was swollen. He voiced his concern to his mum as she returned followed close behind by a doctor he hadn’t seen before.

“Morning Nicholas. I’m just going to do a few checks but all being well let’s get you out of here and onto a ward. One step closer to going home hmm?” Nick looked at his mum for reassurance as he spoke, “um, will I be sharing a room?” Sarah exchanged a glance with the doctor who stopped what he was doing and sat down by Nick.

“Would that worry you?” He looked at him sympathetically. Nick shrugged, then winced. “I know I look awful. I don’t want to have to tell people why I’m here.”

Sarah squeezed his hand. “He’s been having flashbacks in his sleep too.”

“Well, considering what happened to you and your age, I think the best thing would be the paediatric ward, but in a single room.” Sarah was relieved. He was 17 and she didn’t want him on an adult ward after what those men had done to him. Nick nodded in agreement. “You need peace and quiet to heal Nicholas. I’m very pleased with your progress. You probably don’t remember me but I operated on you when you first came in.” Nicks eyes widened. This was the doctor who had saved his life? “Thank you,” he whispered. The doctor put his hand gently on his shoulder. “You don’t need to thank me. Thank me by getting out of here okay?” He smiled at him.

The doctor carried on with his checks and then left, telling them he would be transferred as soon as a porter was available that morning.

“Mum?” Nick looked over to where his mum was busy texting everyone the good news. She looked over at him. “Um, I think I want to see what I look like?” Sarah felt herself pale. She wasn’t sure he was ready for that. “Are you sure baby?” He nodded at her. “Yeah. I need to see.”

“Ok,” Sarah fished in her handbag for her compact mirror. “Just remember, it’s all superficial. The bruises on your face will heal.” He took the mirror from her, closed his eyes and breathed out slowly. He could do this. Nick opened his eyes,  flipped the mirror open and held it in front of him. He let out a gasp as he took in his face. He didn’t look like himself. His face was swollen. His nose was wider than normal. His eyes were swollen and different shades of black, brown and purple. His cheeks had bruises and cuts all over. He had stitches in his forehead. He looked like a monster. “Oh my god,” he whispered. “I look like a freak,” Sarah snatched the mirror away from him, cursing herself for letting him look. Tears pooled in his eyelashes as he looked down at his broken hand. “I’m such a mess mum,” he stuttered. “I can’t believe this happened to me. It’s not fair.” Sarah hugged him as carefully as she could. “You are NOT a freak Nicky, you are injured. And you will heal. But you are right baby, it’s not fair. It’s not fair at all.” She soothed him as much as she could. He looked up at her. “I want to go home,” he sobbed. “I want Nellie and Henry, and my own bed.”

Sarah felt herself welling up, “I know baby, we’ll get you home as soon as the doctors say it’s ok. I promise.” Nick allowed himself to cry for a while in her arms, before sagging back against his pillow.

Charlie was getting ready for school. He couldn’t convince his mum to let him have another day off. He smiled at the text from Sarah, Nick moving to a normal ward was a huge step forward. It meant the doctors were confident he was going to be ok. He sent a message to the group chat to let them know he’d be at school then went downstairs to try and force down some breakfast.

He managed a slice of toast and an apple before racing to catch the bus. He could see his friends waiting for him as the bus pulled up outside Truham. He was immediately engulfed in a tight group hug. He hugged them all back fiercely.

“Charlie,” Elle smiled at him, “we’ve been so worried about you. It’s so good to have you back.”  Charlie smiled softly at her. Darcy’s forehead wrinkled with worry as she asked him, “How’s Nick?”

Charlie sighed. “He’s doing better. They are moving him to a regular room this morning which is amazing.” Everyone looked relieved. “But he’s in so much pain. His dad visited yesterday and um, it didn’t go well.” Charlie wasn’t going to tell them all the details, it wasn’t his story to tell. “He had to be given some medicine to calm him down after that. Sarah said he slept through till the morning. So that’s good at least. I just wish I was with him and not at school.” The Paris squad nodded sympathetically.

“Just so you know Charlie. Word has got out about the attack, so you might get some questions from nosy idiots. We will tell them to fuck off but just be warned.”

Charlie nodded in understanding. He’d expected that. He was more than willing to tell everyone to mind their fucking business.

However it soon became clear that Charlie hadn’t prepared himself for all the questions. On the way to form, during form, after form. Everyone was desperate for an update on Nick.

“Oh my god is it true that Nick Nelson got a gay bashing?”

“Is Nick really in hospital?”

“Charlie? Did they beat you up too?”

Charlie wanted to scream at them all to fuck off, which Tao actually did on a few occasions. He didn’t want to be rude but the last thing Nick was going to want was everything gossiping about him. Especially about what happened. He knew that Nick was very similar to him in that sense, that he absolutely hated being the centre of attention.   It all got a little bit too much for Charlie come lunchtime. He was supposed to meet Tao and Issac out on the field, at their usual picnic bench. He couldn’t face it. He knew he’d just be hounded by everyone again. It was too overwhelming. He knew people just cared and wanted to share their sympathy about what happened and their concerns for Nick but it was a lot and Charlie just didn’t have brain capacity to deal with it today so instead he went to the one place where he felt safe. The art block.   He entered Mr Ajayi’s classroom to find not only him there but Mr Farouk.  He couldn’t help but think there was something going on between the two teachers as they had been spending an awful lot of time together recently. Charlie made himself known by gently coughing in to his elbow. Both teachers snapped their heads up quickly when realisation hit that they weren’t alone anymore. Mr Ajayi quickly got to his feet.  “Ah Charlie! Come on in…” he annouced.  “It’s so good to see you back in school.”   “Uh…I’m sorry to interrupt.” Charlie said quietly.  “I…I was just wondering if I could eat in here?” He said sheepishly. Holding his sandwich box in his hands, although he didn’t intend on eating much. He didn’t feel hungry today, not in the slightest.   “Of course.” Mr Ajayi smiled.     “Thank you.” Charlie smiled as he headed over to his usual spot, on the floor by the sinks.  Mr Farouk stood up. “I have to go.” He announced. He had a feeling that Charlie was probably more likely to open up and feel more comfortable if it was just Mr Ajayi in the room. So he excused himself.     Nathan watched as Charlie sat on the floor, cross legged. His sandwich box unopened in front of him.  He hesitated for a moment before pulling over a chair so he was sitting closer to the teenager.  He cleared his throat.   “I…I was so sorry to hear about what happened to you and Nick.”   Charlie snapped his head up.  “What happened to Nick.” He corrected the art teacher.  “Nothing happened to me. I’m completely fine! That’s the problem…” he said in a shaky voice.   “Charlie….” Mr Ajayi started.  “It’s not fair.” Charlie cried. “Nick is lying broken and bruised in a hospital bed and I don’t even have a scratch on me.” He exclaimed. “How the hell is that fair?”    “Charlie…what happened wasn’t fair. Not at all…” he said.  “You were a victim of a homophobic attack too.”  “No I wasn’t!!” Charlie hit back.  “You were Charlie…” the art teacher said softly.  “Yes, they didn’t hurt you, but they targeted you.  They targeted you and nick because they’re small minded, homophobic scum.”  Charlie looked up at the teacher with teary eyes.   “It was horrible.” He cried. He hadn’t really opened up much about the attack. He found it too difficult but it was all he thought about. Day and night. The events of that evening were constantly on his mind.   “They held me back. They were too strong. I…I tried to stop them. I tried to get them to realise that they were hurting Nick.” He sobbed as images of one of the men holding his arms behind his back as he tried to wriggle free, being forced to watch on as the other 3 men kicked and punched Nick, in the head, the stomach, face, everywhere.  They stamped on him, called him disgusting names, spat on him. Charlie couldn’t do anything. They were too strong.   “They finally stopped kicking him.” Charlie whispered.  “I thought it was all over.  There was blood, so much blood on Nick’s face….” He explained.  “He tried to get up, he tried to crawl away but they kicked him back down. The gang leader whispered something in his ear.”  Charlie didn’t know what that had been. “He then pulled out a knife. I thought he was just trying to scare Nick, even more….i didn’t think he was actually going to use it.”  He cried. The tears streaming down his face. It was too much, retelling the horror.   Mr Ajayi crouched down in front of him, putting his hands on Charlie’s shoulders.  “It’s okay Charlie. You don’t need to tell me anymore.” He soothed.  Charlie didn’t know what to do. He let out a choked sob, he was finally realising how much this whole ordeal has been effecting his as he completely crumbled. Collapsing in to the arms of his art teacher, his sobs echoing through the room.

Chapter Text

Charlie finally stopped crying. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been sobbing on his teachers shoulder but he felt a flare of embarrassment rush through him. “Sorry….” He croaked. He was completely exhausted but he did feel a bit better getting some of it off his chest. “Don’t be silly Charlie, you’ve been through the most unimaginable ordeal. It doesn’t matter that you weren’t physically hurt. You are a victim too.” Mr Ajayi had a steely look in his eye and Charlie knew there was no point protesting. “Now, do you think we should phone your mum? Maybe you have come back too soon?”  “I’ll be fine,” Charlie wiped his face with the back of his hand, “ I only have music this afternoon. I think some drumming would be good for me.” Nathan smiled at him, “ok, but please Charlie. You know where I am if it all gets too much ok?” Charlie nodded and gave him a small smile, “and tell Nick we all wish him well and hope he’s back to school soon.” Charlie shouldered his bag and headed for the music block. His teachers all obviously knew what had happened to him and Nick as they all gave him sympathetic smiles and glances in the corridor. His music teacher was more than happy for him to use the lesson to work on his GCSE music piece on the drums.

When the final bell went he headed quickly for the bus stop so he could get home before going to the hospital to visit Nick. As he was about to climb aboard he saw Tara racing towards him. “Charlie!” He took a step towards her. “You alright Tara?” He watched as she tried to catch her breath. “Yeah,” she panted, “I just wanted to ask you something.” He looked at her curiously, “um, do you think I could come with you to see Nick? I won’t stay long I promise, I just really want to see him, let him know I’m thinking about him.” “Oh….” Charlie stammered, “um I’m not sure if he’s up for visitors? I don’t want to overwhelm him.” He saw Tara’s face fall in disappointment and felt immediately guilty. He wasn’t the only one who loved Nick. “Tell you what, come with me and wait in the cafe? I’ll ask him how he feels about it and we go with what he thinks?” Tara smiled gratefully at him. “Brilliant. I’ll see you at the hospital….what time?” Charlie checked his message from Sarah. “Get there for 5? I’ll meet you out front.” Charlie gave her a hug and got on the bus. The sooner he got home, the sooner he’d be able to get to see Nick. 

Sarah glanced up as she heard the door to Nick’s new room being tapped. She glanced at her son to make sure he wasn’t being disturbed in his sleep. The nurse had explained that it was completely normal that Nick was still taking so many naps throughout the day.  His body had been through so much and it was only normal.  Sarah turned around as she heard the door click open, what she wasn’t expecting was the Police officer that she spoke to on the night of the attack to he standing there. She got up quickly making her way over to where he was stood in the doorway.    “Mrs Nelson…I hope you don’t mind me just dropping in unannounced?” Pc Owen spoke. Sarah shook her head, slightly in shock. Why was the police officer here?  “Could I have a quiet word?”   Sarah glanced between the police officer and her sleeping son.  Nurse Beth stepped in to the room behind the officer.  “I’m just going to quickly check Nick’s obs.” She annouced. He didn’t require just as many routine checks now that it was out of the HDU, but they still wanted to make sure none of his wounds got infected.  Sarah nodded.  That’s good. She was still a little skeptical about leaving Nick, especially after what happened yesterday with Stéphane. She was still so angry about that and she had left her Ex-husband a harsh voice mail. How dare he come here and upset Nick like that. She pulled herself out of her thoughts before following officer Owens out of the room. They stopped in a little waiting room down the hall. It was empty, so it was the perfect place to speak.   “What’s this all about?” Sarah asked quickly.  The officer sighed. He knew she was worried and stressed and desperate to get back to Nick.   “I just thought you’d like to know we’ve caught up 3 of the 4 men that were involved in the attack on your son.”    Sarah felt her body go limp in hearing that. She had began thinking that David was right when he had told her that it was going to be like finding a needle in a haystack. She had began trying to process and accept the fact that they might not be found and that her baby wouldn’t get the justice he deserved. Those men deserved to rot in jail for a very long time.   She then felt herself paling in the face.  3 out of the 4??? So one of those bastards was still out there somewhere. Parading the streets without a care in the world after almost killing her son.   She glanced at the police officer with a desperate look on her face.  “Please tell me one of them is the monster that stabbed my son??!”   She watched as the police officers gaze shifted awkwardly as he looked at the ground. Sarah took that as a no.  The evil scum that had spat in her baby’s face before plunging a knife in to his chest was still out there? Where was the justice in that?  PC Owen’s looked back at Sarah.  “We have a name.” He informed her.  “It seems his mates aren’t as loyal as he thought, one of them blabbed during interrogation.”  He explained.  “I’m here to give you my word that we will not rest until Tony Fitzgerald is behind bars where he belongs.”   He knew he was probably breaking about a hundred rules just by telling Sarah this and revealing the identity of the attacker but scumbags like that did not deserve to be protected, not after what he had done to an innocent seventeen year old kid.  Sarah blinked back her tears.  “Thank you.” She knew she should be thankful that they had caught 3 of the thugs but she wouldn’t be able to rest until she knew that they were all behind bars.    

Sarah made her way back in to the room after the officer left. She was relieved to find that Nicky was still sound asleep. She glanced down at her son’s face. Should she tell him? But then she would have to tell them that the man that had stabbed him was still out there. She knew that wasn’t a good idea. Nick was already suffering from nightmares and night terrors. The past two nights she had been awakened by her terrified son calling out in his sleep, begging his attackers to stop as he tossed and turned.  She had reacted like any other mother would do, running her hands through her son’s sweat soaked hair, soothing him, assuring him that it was just a nightmare and that it was safe and that ‘mummy’ was here and wasn’t going to let anyone hurt him.  It took her back to when Nick was a little boy. There was a stage when he was around 6 years old, intact it was just after Stéphane had moved out. Nick would have nightmares almost every night. She would be woken up by him climbing into her bed, sniffing as he held his stuffed dog teddy to his chest. She comforted him back then and she would continue to do now.   She watched as his chest rose and fell with his breaths. Maybe she wouldn’t tell him right now. Maybe when he was a bit stronger and hopefully by then they would have caught the one that got away.  She was considering telling David, but she knew what he eldest was like and especially have he had a name. She’d only be giving him an invitation to incriminate himself. David had a hot head. He was more like his father than he thought. Quick to anger. Sarah sighed. Not really knowing what to do with the information she had just found out.  She was snapped out of her thoughts, though by a soft groan. She glanced down to see Nick’s eyes flickering open again.   “Hi sweetheart.” She smiled stroking him arm gently.  “Hi.” Nick said hoarsely. Sarah smiled.  “Thirsty?” She asked reaching for the jug of water.  “Mhm.” Nick said sleepily.  Sarah poured some water in to a cup and then used the buttons on the side of the bed to raise it slightly so that Nick was sitting up comfortable. She held the cup out for him. Nick used his left uand. Which was a struggle. They had to go and break his right hand didn’t they? His good hand. He managed though. He managed to get a good grip of the cup, Sarah tried to help but Nick refused. He was determined to this himself.  He managed it. It took a while, but he was able to hold the cup to his lips and take a few sips. Sarah helped him but taking it away as she could she his hand shaking a little.  “Well done, baby.” She told his as he carefully fell back against the pillows. Being ever so gently. Having cracked ribs was a right pain in the arse.  He could barely move without it hurting him.    

“Knock, Knock.”  Nick glanced over to the door. He smiled softly as he seen his Auntie Diane and uncle Rich at the door. Rich was carrying a massive helium balloon that said Get well soon in colourful letters. He was also holding an enveloped card and had a backpack slumped around his shoulder. Diane was carrying the most beautiful bouquet of flowers.  They were mainly for Sarah as she knew her nephew wasn’t much of a flower guy. It was sort of tradition to bring someone flowers in hospital though and she couldn’t resist when she had saw them. Sarah helped her place them on the side, commenting on how beautiful they were.  Rich tied the balloon to the end of his nephews hospital room.  “How are you feeling?” He asked as he sat down.  This was the first time Rich had seen his nephew since the attack. Diane had explained Nick’s injuries to him but it was still a shock to see for his own eyes what those monsters had done.  “Sore.” Nick replied.    “We’ve brought you some Pjs from home.” Diane smiled as Rich handed her over the backpack. She pulled out a few pairs of Pj pants and plain T-shirts and handed them over to Sarah.  “That’s good isn’t it, Nicky.” She smiled.  “You’ll be much more comfier in these instead of that gown.”   Nick nodded softly smiling at his Auntie.  “Thanks!”  “I also figured you’d be going out of your head without entertainment.” She chuckled as she pulled out some magazines and a deck of cards. Nick always enjoyed playing snap when he was little.  “I have also packed your Nintendo Swtich after prying it off of David.” She laughed.  “But maybe wait until you’re feeling less tired before staring at the screen, yeah?”   Nick just rolled his eyes. “You sound like mum.” He mumbled causing his uncle to snort.  Sarah made a face feigning offence although it was light hearted.   “Oh, yeah.” Diane said again reaching in to the bag.  “The twins drew this for you.” She smiled as she pulled out a homemade card. Nick smiled softly as he admired the drawings, decorated by his 8 year old little cousins…”  “Lexie got a little bit carried away with the glitter.” Diane laughed.  Nick grinned. “I love it.” He said as he traced his finger over the drawings. Leo had drawn a stick figure of himself and a taller gangly figure that was presumably Nick holding a rugby ball. Lexi had decorated the card in smiley faces and love hearts and evidently had gone glitter mad.   “Where are the twins anyway?” He asked, noticing the absence of his younger cousins. Hospital wasn’t really a place for them, anyway.  “David’s watching them.” Rich replied.   Nick almost choked on his own saliva.  David? His brother David? No way.   “You’re joking right?” He asked as he raised an eyebrow.  “No..” Rich shook his head. “He’s been really good with them, actually.”  Rich explained to his nephew. Diane nodded in agreement.  “He’s been letting the twins help him walk Nellie and Henry.”   Nick rolled his eyes.  “More like the twins and the dogs walking David.”    “Nicholas!” Sarah scolded.   “Your brother’s been a great help the last few days.”    Nick just sighed, crossing his arm’s over his chest.  “I’m sure.” He scoffed.  Sarah sighed. Maybe her boys were never going to see eye to eye, but she hoped that they could learn to get along.    

“Have they been giving you much for the pain?” Diane asked her nephew as she sat down again.   “Lots of morphine. It either makes me high or knocks me out, mostly.” Nick laughed.  Sarah glanced at her sister and then at her son.  “Do you want some juice, Nicky?” She asked. He had mostly been drinking water but he had enjoyed the apple juice he had at breakfast. Some flavour.   “Yes, please.” Nick smiled. That sounded good, actually.   “Di, do you fancy coming down to the canteen with me. I won’t be able to carry all our drinks.” She lied. She just wanted an excuse to talk to her sister, privately and away from the room.  Rich sensed this and decided to create a distraction for Nick. He picked up the brand new deck of cards, unwrapping the plastic wrap from them.  “Fancy a game of snap?” He asked his nephew with a grin.  “I’ll even go easy on you.”   Nick just laughed.  “Sure.”   He watched his uncle divvy out the cards as his mum and auntie slid out of the room.   

Sarah and Diane ordered their drinks and stood at the end of the counter waiting for them to be prepared. “What’s up?” Diane looked at Sarah questioningly. “You definitely didn’t need my help to get the drinks.” Sarah sighed. “Let’s sit down. Rich has Nick occupied for a bit, come and tell me what’s on your mind.” Sarah smiled at her gratefully and they made their way to a free table. Sarah took a sip of her coffee before filling Diane in about the visit from the police, about how the leader was still out there, about how Nick had been devastated when he saw his reflection in the mirror. She hadn’t realised she was crying until Diane reached into her bag and pulled out some tissues, handing them to her. “Sorry Di, I think it’s all just hitting me. It’s not just a case of getting him physically better. This is going to be with us for a long time. Maybe forever.” Diane reached over and grasped both Sarah’s hands. “He’ll be ok. He’s strong, he’s got the fiercest mum in the world in his corner, friends and family to support him. It’s not going to be easy or quick. But he’ll be ok sis.” Sarah gave her a small smile. “Thank you. I think after the attack and then the whole Stéphane mess, I just want to protect him and keep him safe from the rest of the world. I’m still so angry with him.” Diane looked sympathetically at her. “Come on, let’s get this juice back to Nick and Rich his coffee before it’s too cold.” She hugged Sarah as they made their way back to Nicks room, smiling at the sight in front of them. Nick and rich were playing snap. Nick was grinning, he was obviously winning. Rich had his right hand behind his back to even up the playing field. They were both giggling as they attempted to play one handed. It was the first smile she’d seen on him since the attack and it warmed her heart. “Ow,” Nick stopped to clutch his ribs. Rich looked at him in concern. 

“I think that’s enough snap for one day,” Sarah entered the room and looked at Nick with concern. “You ok baby?” He looked at her, pain etched on his face. “Yeah….just hurts a bit.” He sagged back against his pillow. He felt so pathetic. Sarah brushed his forehead gently with her fingers. “Just rest Nicky,” Nick sighed. He hated this so much. He laid back and closed his eyes, working on his slow breathing to give his ribs and incision sites a rest. “Sorry Sarah,” rich looked sheepish. “I didn’t think….” Sarah smiled at him. “It’s ok, honestly that’s the most animated he’s been in days.” She looked down at Nick. “Sleep now baby, Charlie will be here in a few hours so rest up now.”

Tara was waiting for Charlie when his mum dropped him off at the hospital. She was carrying a small bag of goodies for Nick, along with a card from her and Darcy. She was nervously shuffling from one foot to the other. “Hey Tara,” Charlie gave her a quick hug. Charlie showed her where the cafe was and then went up to Nicks new floor. He found his room and knocked quietly. He heard Sarah’s voice telling him to come in. He peeked round the doorway. Nick was dozing. He’d been changed out of his gown and into his normal pyjamas. He was still attached to a lot of wires and tubes but he looked more comfortable dressed in his own clothes. “Hi,” he whispered, coming over to stand by Nick. “How’s he doing?” Sarah smiled at him, “he’s ok. He’s managed to eat a bit today and he’s been awake more. He insisted I wake him when you arrived!” She leaned over and touched Nick’s shoulder gently. “Nicky baby, Charlie’s here?” Nick stirred and opened his eyes. His face lightened when he saw Charlie next to him. “Hi babe,“ Charlie reached over and kissed him gently on his cheek. “How are you feeling?” He searched Nicks face for any sign of pain. “I’m ok. More awake than yesterday. Still so sore everywhere though. “ Charlie gave him a small smile. “I love you so much Nick.” Nick smiled, “ I love you too Charlie, so much.” He closed his eyes as Charlie gently stroked his cheek. Sarah watched on fondly. “Um, babe?” Nick opened his eyes and looked at him. “How would you feel about another visitor?” Nick paled. Sarah looked at Charlie in shock. “Who?” Nick asked, a tremble in his voice. “It’s Tara,” Charlie could see the fear in his eyes, “she doesn’t have to come. She just really wanted to come and see you. Just her, nobody else. What do you think? If you say no it’s totally fine, she’ll just go home again. “  “She’s here?” Nicks whispered. Charlie nodded guiltily. Maybe this had been a bad idea. “Yeah, she’s in the coffee shop. She loves you Nick, she just wants to see how you are.” Nick sighed. He couldn’t hide from everyone forever and he was really close to Tara, especially after Charlie’s illness last year. Eventually he nodded. “ yeah ok.”  Sarah breathed a sigh of relief. “I’ll go get her baby, Charlie can sit with you. I’ll pop home for some dinner, then be back ok?” She kissed him on the forehead and left. 

“Are you sure you’re ok with it?” Charlie was worried. Sarah had told him how Nick had reacted so seeing his face for the first time. “Yeah it’s ok. I can’t hide forever…..I just don’t want her to be repulsed by how hideous I am.” He tried to make light of it but Charlie saw through it straight away. "Hey, no being mean about my boyfriend.” he took Nicks hand a squeezed it. “There is nothing hideous about you babe. You have some injuries, that’s all. You are still the same Nick.” Nick nodded at him as there was a knock on the door. Charlie got up to get it and let Tara in. “He’s really nervous about you seeing him,” he whispered. “Try not to look too shocked ok?” Tara nodded and entered the room. She tried really hard not to show it on her face but her heart shattered at the sight in front of her. She knew he’d been beaten up, she knew he’d been stabbed. But somehow she hadn’t pictured what he would actually look like. His face was just a cluster of angry bruises. His arms were covered in them, too. His head was bandaged up. She locked eyes with him and smiled softly. “Hi Nick,” her voice quivered. She needed to pull herself together. She walked up to him, “Can I hug you?” Tears pooled in her eyes, she couldn’t help it. Nick nodded at her and she gently bent down and put her arms around him. The tears started to flow then, she just couldn’t stop it. “I’m so sorry Nick, I’m so sorry.” She sat back and pulled up the chair close. “How are you feeling?” Nick sighed, “sore. Fed up. Tired. I’m sorry you have to see me looking like this. I know I look disgusting.” He watched the tears tracking down her cheeks. “What?” She looked at him horrified. “Nick I’m not crying because I think you look disgusting. I just can’t believe what those bastards did to you. I can’t believe anyone would want to hurt you like this. I’m just sorry. I wish I could take it all away.” Nick took her hand. “Thanks Tara.” There was a moment of silence while Tara tried to pull herself together. “How long will you be in here do you think?”

Nick shrugged, wincing slightly. “A while longer I think. I haven’t got out of bed yet and they still have me on a fair bit of morphine. I think they want to make sure my wounds are healing ok first. “ he hesitated. “My stomach and chest are a bit of a mess to be honest.” He looked down at his shirt. He could feel himself welling up again. Tara squeezed his hand. “I’m so glad you are going to be ok Nick. I don’t know what we’d do……” she trailed off. That sentence didn’t need finishing. Charlie decided they needed a change of subject. “What’s in the bag?”Tara brightened, “oh! I got you a few bits to keep you busy!” She rummaged in the bag, pulling out some sweets, snacks, a F1 magazine and a card. Nick smiled as he flicked through all the bits. “Thank you, that’s really nice of you.” Tara beamed at him. “It was my pleasure. Everyone’s been so worried about you Nick.” Charlie held Nicks hand as they chatted. Visiting time was over far too quickly and a nurse appeared at the door. “Hi Nick, time for your friends to go home I’m afraid. We need to do some obs on you and change your dressings.” “Oh ok,” Nick was disappointed. It had been really nice to see Tara and Charlie. He hated it when he was alone. He said his goodbyes to them and watched them leave. Tara and Charlie made their way to the car park where Jane was waiting  to take them home. “God Charlie, I wasn’t expecting him to look so bad. I don’t think I reacted very well.” Charlie hugged her, “you did fine. It was a shock for me too the first time I visited and I was there when it happened.” Tara shuddered. “He really did nearly die didn’t he…..” Charlie nodded. “Yeah,” he breathed. “He nearly did.”

That conversation with Tara stuck in Charlie’s brains. Nick almost died.  He didn’t think he was we going to get the images of himself cradling a bleeding Nick in his arms, desperately trying to stem the bleeding from his stab wound as they waited for the paramedics to arrive, out of his head, ever.   Charlie left Tara at the bus stop as they lived in opposite directions. Today had been tough. His breakdown in school, having to deal with prying students and then visiting Nick with Tara. Seeing how shocked Tara was from seeing Nick for the first time following the assault, was tough.  The small conversation had completely exhausted Nick and he had fallen asleep by the end of it. Charlie had expressed his concerns to Sarah, asking if it was normal that Nick was still so tired. Sarah had told him how she’d been worried about the same things but she had spoken to Nick’s consultant who had assured here it was completely normal for him to still be so tired.  Charlie, although he wouldn’t admit it, was struggling himself.  He glanced at his phone as he entered his room. He had multiple messages from his friends, on the group chat and separately. He glanced through some of them.  

Tao:  Charlie? Are you okay? I thought we were supposed to be having lunch together on the field…

Issac: Hey! Are you still meeting us for lunch? 

Tao: Did you go home?? 

Elle: Hey Charlie. Tao told me you went awol at lunchtime? Is everything okay? 

Tara: Thank you so much for letting me come visit Nick with you, Charlie.  I just had to see him!!  I can’t believe what those monsters have done to him 😫 but how are you? All of this can’t be easy for you, either x 

Charlie sighed as he lay down on his bed as he read through the messages. He felt ignorant but he just didn’t have the energy to reply right now. He felt physically, mentally and emotionally drained right now.  He hoped his friends would understand and realise that it wasn’t trying to be rude. He was just in a really bad place right now. He was struggling to accept what had happened to Nick. What had happened to himself.  You are a victim of homophobia, too. Charlie. Mr Ajayi’s words from earlier mentally screaming at him.  Charlie just didn’t know how to deal with everything, so he did what he did best and ignored it. He put his phone on do not disturb, placed it on the side and buried his head under the duvet. He just wanted to hide away from the world for a bit. 

Back at the hospital. Nick had just finished his dinner. Mashed potatoes and lumpy stew. He managed the potatoes, the stew was a little bit challenging for him to chew. It still hurt so the nurse opted for him to stick to soft foods for the time being, she brought him a yoghurt, which he managed all of. Feeding himself with his left hand was still proving a little difficult and he relied on Sarah’s assistance. He felt like a baby. He hated it.  He definitely felt comfier in his own pyjamas though and his Auntie Diane had brought him his own blanket from home instead of the itchy cotton sheets that the hospital provided.  Nick was flicking through one of his sports magazine. It was definitely harder with a broken hand. So he took his time turning the pages.  He wasn’t really paying much attention, though. His head felt a little fuzzy.  Sarah sat by his side, reading her book. She picked her phone up from the side as it buzzed, she then glanced at Nick.  “Your brothers on his way to see you.”  She was met with a groan of annoyance from her youngest son.  “Nick…” she said warningly.   “Does he have to come?”   He complained. He had been putting off David’s visit request for days. Any time Sarah would mention that David had asked to visit. Nick would make up some excuse. He was too tired. He was in too much pain, etc. Truthfully, he just didn’t want to see David.    “He’s really been trying, Nicky.”  Sarah sighed as she placed her book down.   “Yeah, I’m sure.” Nick scoffed stubbornly, crossing his arms across his chest and pouting. Why did Sarah always have to make excuses for David?     “Really, darling.” Sarah told him.  “David came right away as soon as i called him. He was so so worried about you.”   Nick just rolled his eyes.  “I bet all his birthdays and Christmasses came at once when he heard someone had tried to knock the bi right out of me…”   “Nick!” Sarah said firmly, giving her youngest a stern look.  “That’s not true and you know it’s not.”    Nick just sighed. Okay, maybe that was a little harsh but David has been behaving like a complete bellend ever since he found out about his bisexuality.   

“He was willing to donate blood for you…” Sarah told him, raising her eyebrow. Nick glanced at his mother.  “Really?” He asked.  Sarah nodded.  “After you were rushed in to theatre for the second time, the doctor was concerned about how much blood you had lost  and  that you needed another transfusion but with you being O- it’s not exactly the easiest supply to come by. David volunteered to donate…” she explained.  “They managed to get some sent in from another hospital as they don’t tend to use relatives as blood donors anymore but the sentiment was there…”   Nick blinked in shock. His big brother had actually been willing to give him blood. That was probably one of the nicest things he had ever done, but it didn’t get him off the hook so easily. David would still have a lot of making up to do if he wanted to rekindle some of the brotherly bond.  It isn’t always been this way between the brothers. They were actually quite close when they were younger, but David changed after Sarah divorced Stéphane.   “At least listen to what he’s got to say, eh?” Sarah asked softly.  “If not for him, do it for me?” She asked twinkling her eyes.  Nick rolled his eyes in response. How on earth was he supposed to say no to her.  “Fine.” He huffed.  “I’ll listen to him…” he agreed. “You can’t expect me to forgive him straight away, though.” He said raising his brow.   “I’m not asking you to baby.” Sarah replied as she smoothed out his fringe. She just hoped that both boys would be able to be civil in the same room together.  

David finally appeared after dinner, with only about half an hour of visiting time to go. Nick briefly wondered if he had done this on purpose so he wouldn’t have to stay long. But then he thought back to what his mum had said. How worried he’d been and how he’d wanted to donate his blood to help. Maybe he needed to give him a chance.  “Hi,” David was still hovering in the doorway, looking for permission to come in. “Hey,” Nick gave him a small smile. “Can I come in for a bit” Nick shrugged and David sat down next to him.  “How are you feeling?” David looked at him carefully. Nick wasn’t making,eye contact. Just looking down at his injured hand. “I guess you got want you wanted,” he said quietly. “What? What do you mean by that?” David did his best to stay calm. His mum would kill him if he upset Nick.  “Your pathetic little brother got what he deserved for being in a relationship with a boy.” Nick couldn’t help the anger in his voice. He knew he was goading David, trying to get a reaction, he wasn’t sure why. David paled. Did Nick really think he’d be happy that this happened? Was he really that shit of a brother? “Nick, no!” He said firmly, causing Nick to finally look up and make eye contact. “Look….” David took a breath to collect his thoughts. He wanted to get this right. “I came here to say sorry.” Nicks eyes widened as he stared at his brother. Those were not the words he was expecting. David leaned forward in his chair. “I need to say this. Just hear me out ok and then I’ll go if you want me to?” Nick nodded, watching his brother curiously.  “I’m sorry. I’ve been the shittest brother in the world. Mum is disappointed in me. She accused me of being as bad as the bastards that did this…..and she’s right. I never hurt you physically but I know I did a lot of damage anyway. I think deep down I’ve always been so jealous of you. You and mum have always got on so well, you are better at rugby than me, everyone likes you……” he stopped to catch his breath. 

Nick didn’t dare move, he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “when I found out you were seeing Charlie, it seemed like I’d found a flaw in your perfect life. And I used it to make you feel bad.” “Charlie is not a flaw in my life,” Nick hissed. He didn’t like where this apology was going. David stopped and held his hands up in surrender. “Shit, no I know he’s not. I know that now. I’m not very good at this…..I just….it was something about you that wasn’t what was expected by everyone, by dad, something I could cling on to and make fun of.” David could feel himself tying himself up in knots. He knew he’d been wrong. “I was being homophobic. I know that now. I just….i don’t know many gay people, or bi people. I know I acted like a shit brother….” Nick quietly contemplated David’s words, “you tried to out me to dad. You constantly made fun of me and Charlie. You made me feel like I wasn’t good enough. It’s going to take more than an apology David.” David sighed, “I know. I’m going to do better. I just hope you’ll give me a chance to prove that I want to be better? I want to change.” Nick searched David’s face to see if he believed him. He looked sincere. He thought about his mum and how much it would mean to her for her boys to get on. “Ok,” he said quietly. “I accept your apology.” David smiled for the first time since he arrived. “Thanks,” he replied. They sat in silence awkwardly for a minute.  “So how long are you down for?” Nicks looked at him curiously. “Oh, I’m not sure. I emailed my lecturers to say it was a family emergency. I guess I’ll stay till you are home? Help mum with the dogs and stuff.”  “That’s nice of you.” Nick yawned, “do you maybe want to come and visit me tomorrow?” David smiled at him, “yeah I’d like that. Thanks Nick. Thanks for giving me a chance.” He leaned over and gave a very awkward hug to Nick. “I’ll let you rest.” 

Nick laid back in his bed. That was the weirdest half hour of his life. He was still going to have his guard up around David, but it felt good to hear the apology. It’s a shame it took him being stabbed and beaten to hear it though. Sarah popped up after visiting hours. Nick filled her in on the visit. She has tears in her eyes when he told her he was going to give David a chance. “Oh baby, I’m so happy to hear that,” she sniffled. She stayed while Nick was given his bedtime meds and settled for the night, then gave him a kiss on the cheek. “I’ll be here in the morning sweetheart. Just rest ok?” He nodded at her sleepily and was out for the count before she’d closed the door.

“People like you make me sick,” Nick was on his knees, he could feel his hair being pulled so hard it felt like it was going to be ripped out of his skull. He could barely see, blood was dripping down his face, his whole body hurt. He could hear Charlie screaming. Then a white hot pain ripped into his chest. He looked down and saw blood blossoming all over his hoodie. He was so so tired. The person holding him let go and he slumped onto the ground. He was vaguely aware of noises around him but he was fading. He was going to die….. “No!” Nick was shouting in his sleep, tossing from side to side, “please stop….help me….Charlie!” The door to his hospital room burst open and Nurse Beth was at his side in an instant. “Nick, you need to wake up sweetheart. It’s just a dream.” She gently shook his shoulders, not wanting to hurt him further but determined to wake him up. Tears were streaking down his cheeks as he opened his eyes and tried to work out where he was. He saw a figure looming over him. Oh god was it the attacked was he back? He tried to move out the way but was stopped by the jarring pain in his stomach. “Nick, it’s ok. You are safe. It’s ok.” He heard the voice filtering through his panic. That was a woman’s voice. He let his eyes adjust to the light snd saw the kind face of a nurse looking down at him. “There you go.” She gently stroked his hair. “It was a nightmare. You are safe in hospital.” Nick took a shuddering breath and let himself cry. It had felt so real. He was back there. Beth comforted him as he cried. Eventually his tears dried and he mumbled, “sorry.” Beth chuckled, “don’t you dare apologise!” Her voice more serous as she added, “were you having a nightmare about the attack?” He nodded, closing his eyes. “I was right back there, it was like it was happening again.” He was so tired. It was obviously still the middle of the night, “I want my mum,” he sniffled. Beth’s heart ached for him.“I know, she’ll be here first thing. Let me sit with you while you sleep ok? I’ll make sure you are ok. Do you want something to calm you down?” Nick shook his head. He hated how woozy it made him feel. “No I’ll be ok.” He focused on his breathing, his hand firmly in Beth’s as he worked to calm himself down. Beth gently stroked his hand, “Just sleep Nick. I promise you are safe.” He let himself relax back into his pillow. The sooner he slept the sooner his mum would be back.

Sarah grabbed her usual morning coffee from the canteen before heading towards the lift, towards Nick’s ward. She had fallen in to a daily routine. She would get up, shower, walk the dogs, sometimes even have time to grab a quick shower before making her way to the hospital.  Usual visiting hours didn’t start until 10am but seeing as Nick was still technically classed as a minor and the severity of his injuries. She was permitted to visit first thing so she made a point of arriving at the hospital around 7:30am most morning. Just in time for Nick waking up and the breakfast rounds.    She sipped her coffee as she stepped out of the lift.  She hoped Nick had slept well. This was the first few nights since the attack that she’s not spent the night with Nick. It was a week today, since those monsters brutally beat up her son and just left him for dead.  She had been so hesitant in leaving him, but she knew she had to start somewhere.  She felt very rested up after sleeping at home all night. She stepped on to the ward, using the hand sanitizer and warmly smiling at the nurses station. She was just about to round the corner to Nick’s room when Beth stopped her in the corridor.  “Morning Sarah!” Beth greeted, warmly.  “Could I have a quick word, please?”    Sarah glanced at Beth, frowning slightly. Why was Beth still here? She was night shift last night. Her shift should have ended already.  Beth was supposed to clock off at 6am, when the morning staff took over, but she felt like she needed to speak to Sarah and fill her in on Nick’s nightmare during the night. It had taken her quite the time to settle him. He had been so resistant to allow himself to fall back over again.    “Is everything okay?” Sarah asked, she paled slightly.  “Is it Nick? Has something happened?”  a million horrible thoughts started running through her mind. Had Nicky taken a turn for the worst? Had he left the HDU too soon? She began breathing quicker. What had happened?   

Beth placed a comforting hand on the mother’s shoulder.  “Nick’s fine.” She assured her and then bit her lip, softly. Maybe ‘fine’ wasn’t the right word, but she could hear the cogs turning in Sarah’s mind. She had to quickly assure her that physically Nick was ok.  She ushered her in to a quiet, empty room.   “Did you sleep alright?” Beth asked as she closed the door.   Sarah frowned again, surely Beth hadn’t wanted to speak to her privately just to ask her that.  She nodded. “Eventually…the dogs were over excited, took me a while to settle them.” She explained.  She then glanced at the Nurse.  “Did Nick sleep alright?”  She asked, she couldn’t help but notice the look at crept on to Beth’s face. She paled instantly. Her eyes crowing wide.  She felt her stomach knotting.  “He had another Nightmare, didn’t he?” She asked quietly. The mum guilt suddenly hitting her like a tonne of bricks.  Beth nodded softly.  “2am-ish…i was just doing late night rounds on the ward when i heard him sobbing…” she explained.  Sarah felt like someone had just plunged a knife through her heart. Nick had been crying out in the night, because he was most likely dreaming about what had happened to him. She felt her legs turn to jelly and she had to sit down with her head in her hands. Beth sat next to her.  She continued speaking, she knew this wasn’t nice for Sarah to hear but she also believed that Sarah needed to hear it. She needed to know the mental and psychological effect this had all had on Nick.    “He was screaming out…telling them to stop, to stop hurting him.” Sarah let out a choked sob. She had already witnessed a few similar episodes to this but hearing it, just broke her heart all over again.  “It took me a while to wake him up and to calm him down.” Beth explained.    “He kept asking for you…”   “You should have rung me!” Sarah sighed, frustratedly. She didn’t mean to take it out on Beth. She was the sweetest girl, she had been such a great help and support through all of this but it just upset Sarah knowing that Nicky wanted her and she wasn’t there. How selfish of her was that???  Beth sighed, giving Sarah’s hand a gentle squeeze.  “Sarah you needed sleep yourself.”    “Nick needed me! He was scared and upset and I just left. I knew last night that I shouldn’t have gone home.” She sighed, her tears threatening to fall.  “Nick’s been having these night terrors most nights since the attack. I…I just assumed they would pass, but-“ her voice cracked. “I don’t think they’re going to….those bastards…they’ve not only messed by baby up physically..” she cried. Beth just held her as she sobbed. Sarah needed to cry. She had been holding in her own emotions for far too long. It was about time that the dam broke.   “We can get Nick help, there’s plenty of qualified professionals out there but first things first…we have to get him better first.” She soothed, rubbing Sarah’s arm comfortingly. “How about we just take things one step at a time, eh?” She suggested. Sarah just nodded, she feltSo lucky to have Beth by her side.   Beth handed her a tissue and stood up.  “Let’s go see your boy, eh?” She smiled. “Breakfast should just be getting served around about now…” Sarah smiled, standing up, she was desperate to see Nick.  

They entered the room. Nick was very much awake, sitting up, a breakfast tray in front of him. He’d drank half a cup of apple juice and his whole pot of yoghurt as well as the corner of a bagel. His eyes lit up when he saw sarah.  “Oh baby, I’m so sorry that i left you.” Sarah soothed as she engulfed him in a hug.  Nick frowned at first, what was she talking about and then he remembered. Oh how he remembered.  He woke up with a start, panting and breathing heavily. His hair and the pillow beneath his head were soaked through with sweat.  It had only been a dream. It had felt so so real. He had been back there. The punches and the kicks, they all felt so real as he cried out for them to stop. He used his hands to protect his face from the blows as they rained down on him. Charlie’s screams of horror. It all seemed so real, but it had all been a dream. Beth was there. She had wiped the sweat of his brow with a tissue, gotten him a drink of water and soothed him back to sleep.     Nick turned to Sarah, his lip beginning to wobble.  “It was so real, mum…” he whispered.     “Oh sweetheart..” Sarah cooed, hugging him tighter but being mindful of his broken ribs.   “It felt so real..” he said as his lip quivered.   “It was just a nightmare darling.” Sarah soothed, twisting her fingers around his hair gently, like she used to do when he was little and would be scared or upset.   He’d always be her little boy, no matter how old he was. She felt terrible. Why didn’t she listen to her gut instincts.  She had thought that it had been too soon to leave Nick alone during the night, but she had listened to Diane, David, the nurses. She knew it was too soon. Nick needed her. Her baby boy had woken up during the night scared and frightened and she hadn’t been there to comfort him. She felt so guilty. How was she supposed to leave him again?   She had a feeling these nightmares weren’t going to go away any time soon. Nick was healing, physically healing, but mentally, he still had a lot of healing to do. This traumatic ordeal was going to have a long lasting effect on him emotionally and mentally.   She wanted to make it better. She was his mum. She wasn’t supposed to let bad things like this happen to him.  

Sarah was reluctant to leave his side that morning. She nipped to get a coffee and some food but other than that she was by his side. The doctor came to do his rounds early in the afternoon. He checked Nick’s stitches, causing Nick to wince as he prodded the site carefully. “I’m pleased with how these are healing up,” he announced to the room. “I think it’s time we got you up and about young man. All being well you can go home in a day or two. Nick perked up. He was desperate to go home. He’d be much more comfy in his own bed with his dogs, his tv to keep him occupied. The thought of getting out of bed however filled him with dread. He still had a catheter in and hadn’t had to move at all. “Ok,” he said nervously. Sarah squeezed his hand. “That’s great news Nicky, one step closer to coming home.” The doctor explained that a nurse would be by shortly to remove his catheter and help him go for a short walk round the ward. “It’s important he is able to get himself up and about before he goes home.” The doctor left and Nick sighed. He was not looking forward to this bit. Nick insisted his mum wait outside as the nurse came to remove the catheter. “Oh Nicky it’s nothing I haven’t seen before!” She chuckled as he glared at her, then took herself off for a coffee. When she returned the nurse had Nick sat up on the edge of the bed, hospital grippy socks on his feet. His face was ashen and he was grimacing in pain. “Good job Nick,” Nurse Adam had his hands on Nicks waist to gently support him. Nick was breathing shallow short breaths, “it really hurts.” He grimaced.

Sarah watched from the doorway, not wanting to distract him. “Let’s try standing up,” Adam suggested. Nick nodded and braced himself as he gingerly tried to stand. The pain that ripped through his stomach and ribs was excruciating and he couldn’t quite stand up straight but he made an attempt. His good hand was gripping onto his stomach. Beads of sweat were forming on his forehead. “Excellent!” Adam was pleased with his progress. Sarah felt her heart squeeze tightly she hated seeing him in so much pain. “Let’s go for a short walk hmm? To the bathroom and back maybe.” Nick looked up and saw his mum smiling at him from the doorway, tears in her eyes. “I’m so proud of you Nick. You are doing so well.” He tried to smile but it came out as more of a grimace. Adam held on tight to Nick as they slowly made their way out of the room and down the corridor. Nicks legs felt shaky. He hadn’t moved them in days. He felt a bit queasy too and dizzy. He made it the short distance to the bathroom but on the way back he leaned against Adam, the pain in his chest was overwhelming and his head was pounding. “I think I need to sit down, “ he managed to wheeze out. Adam signalled to a nearby nurse who came to his aid and between the three of them they managed to half drag him back to his room. He collapsed onto the bed, overcome with pain. “Well done Nicky,” his mum was instantly by his side, rubbing his shoulder soothingly. “Just rest, that will have taken it out of you,” he nodded and closed his eyes, focusing on his breathing. He couldn’t believe how much that had hurt, he walked like an old man hunched over. He felt pathetic. Adam looked up at Sarah. “That was brilliant. We will try again later when he’s rested.” Adam left and Sarah resumed her position watching Nick rest for the afternoon. Nick had agreed to more visitors after school. He was really nervous but also excited to see his friends as it had been so long. He was still worried about their reactions to his appearance but Charlie had promised him that they had all been warned what he looked like and that they didn’t care. They just wanted to see him.

So when Charlie popped his head round the doorway and raised his eyebrow in question, Nick smiled and nodded. Tao, Elle, Isaac, Tara and Darcy all piled into the room, arms full of gifts for Nick. They were under strict instructions not to comment on how bruised and cut Nicks face was. But he could see that they were shocked. He didn’t blame them really. He knew it was a frightening sight. “Hi guys,” he gave them a small smile. Darcy was the first to speak. “Nick, my guy!” She walked up to by his bed and gave him a gentle hug. “I’m so glad you are ok,” her eyes were a bit teary but she held it together. Tara squeezed her hand. “Hi Nick,” he smiled at her. Tao was stood still by the doorway. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing. He felt weirdly guilty. Guilty that he was straight and wouldn’t be targeted like Nick and Charlie had been. He took in all the bruises, the cast on his arm. God he wanted them to catch the bastards who did this. He approached the other side of the bed, along with Elle and Isaac. “Thanks for coming,” Nick said quietly. “Of course, we’ve been so worried about you.” Isaac gave him a kind smile. “And we have gifts!” Elle waved her bag dramatically. Nick laughed. It was good to see them all. He opened up his gifts, he had more sweets and snacks. A cute teddy that looked very much like Henry, a dvd player from Tao with some weird indie films, homemade cards. It was all so thoughtful, he could feel himself welling up. “Oh god Nick, I’m sorry, is this too much?” Charlie was instantly at his side tenderly wiping the tears from his cheeks. Nick took a shaky breath, “no no it’s lovely. I’m just a bit all over the place. I didn’t sleep very well last night…I’m really glad to see you all. Honest.” “Are you in a lot of pain Nick?” Asked Elle. Nick nodded at her, “yeah” he sighed., fiddling with the ears on the pug toy. “They made me get out of bed this afternoon. I only made it as far as the bathroom but it’s made everything so sore again. It’s my chest and my stomach that’s the worst.” “But Charlie said you might be home soon?” Isaac looked at Charlie for confirmation. “Yes!” Charlie smiled at him, “Sarah reckoned another day or two.” “That’s great,” Isaac smiled softly at Nick. It was so horrible to see his friend so down, so in pain and so small. He wished he could do more to help.

“Distract me with news from school.” Nick laid back against the pillow. He was exhausted. The lack of sleep from last night combined with the exertion of the walk meant he had zero energy. He closed his eyes and listened to his friends, smiling and laughing at their jokes to let them know he was still awake. Eventually though, sleep claimed him and Charlie gestured towards the door. They all tiptoed quietly out and closed the door behind them. “Jesus Charlie,” Tao was the first to speak. I know you said it was bad, but I don’t know….i wasn’t expecting him to be so badly beaten, so in pain.” “Yeah,” Charlie looked down at his shoes, “ and the worst of it is hidden under his t shirt. I got a glimpse of it a few days ago. He must be in so much pain,” he whispered. Tao pulled him into a hug. They all made their way back out, passing Sarah on the way. She took sight of Charlie’s red rimmed eyes. “Is he ok?” She asked worriedly. “Yeah, he’s fine, he fell asleep.” Charlie’s accepted the hug she offered. “He had a bad nightmare last night, I’m glad he’s resting now. I’ll go back up so he’s not alone.”

“He had a bad nightmare last night” the worlds just kept replaying in Charlie’s mind. It hurt him so much that Nick was being haunted by flashbacks of his brutal attack. He wouldn’t be lying when he said he’d woke up screaming in the middle of the night, too, but he hadn’t been the one that had been beaten to a pulp.  Seeing their friends see Nick for the first time, well apart from Tara, had been just as difficult as he thought it would be.  They had all been as equally shocked as he thought they’d be.  Charlie knew that Nick still had a lengthy recovery ahead of him, not just his physical recovery but his mental one. He promised he’d be there by his side throughout it all.  

Sarah and David entered the main entrance to the hospital 2 days later. Sarah was gripping on to a massive bunch of flowers where as David was holding on to a gift bag that contained several boxes of chocolates and thank you cards.  Today was the day. Nicky was getting to come home, after spending a week in hospital.  It has probably been the longest, scariest week of Sarah’s life.  Sarah just had to show a little bit of gratitude towards the nurses and doctors that had played a part in saving her son’s life. Nick’s charge consultant had told Sarah that Nick hadn’t gotten to hospital as quickly as he did, he probably wouldn’t have survived. Hearing that. Hearing a doctor tell you that your child couldn’t died just put so much in to perspective. They turned on to Nick’s ward. This was it. Nick was finally coming home. Sarah couldn’t wait to get him home, to tuck him up into his own bed. She wanted to wrap him up in bubble wrap and protect him for the rest of his life.  Nick was sitting on top of the bed, waiting for them. He was dressed in loose jogging bottoms and a hoodie. The first time he’d been dressed in actual clothes in a week. Beth had helped him get dressed.  The bandage from his head had been removed, the stitches were healing nicely. He still had bandages on his chest and stomach and Sarah had been shown how to clean out the wounds properly and change the bandages. He’d need to come back in a week’s time for a check-up. He was still on some strong prescribed pain medication but not as much as he had been on as his doctor had wanted to lower the dosage to prevent his body become addicted to the drugs.    “Hi sweetheart.” Sarah smiled as she entered the room.  “Ready to go home?”    Nick grinned. He was more than ready. 

Sarah and David packed up Nick’s belongings, all his gifts and cards from friends and family, his personal belongings, etc. David zipped everything into a duffel bag.  Sarah handed Nick’s trainers over to David. “Can you help him? I’m just going to to drop these gifts in to reception and then we’ll get going…” she said quickly before either boy had a chance to protest.    “I can do it myself.” Nick replied grumpily as he snatched his trainers from David. David gave him a pointed look, raising an eyebrow.  Nick couldn’t bend down without wincing in pain.  How on earth was he supposed to put his shoes on. David held his hands up in exasperation. “Be my guest..” he said, crossing his arms against his chest and watching his younger brother with a smug look on his face.  Things between the boys had been slightly better since their chat a few days again. David had been visiting everyday and they chatted, even shared a laugh together occasionally as David filled Nick in about uni life. It was going to take a while for them to properly mend their bond. Nick has forgiven David, but he made it known that he’d never forget. He’d never forget the way his brother treated him, not just over his sexuality, but the way David had treated him for years.  

Nick unlaced his Vans. That was easy, but how was he going to get them on? He hadn’t really thought this through had he?  He let his stubbornness win.  He sighed as he dropped one of this shoes on the floor luckily it landed up right. He managed to move his left foot so that it was balancing on top of the shoe. Now all he had to do was get his foot inside. This was going to be the difficult part.  He bent over ever so slowly. Wincing and hissing as pain cursed through his ribs. He gripped on to them as he tried to squeeze his foot in to the show. David watched on with a smirk as he tapped his own foot against the floor. He couldn’t watch on any longer. Nick was clearly in pain and he wasn’t about to let his brother hurt himself any further just by trying to prove a point.  He sighed as he crouched down in front of Nick, he snatched the other shoe out of his hand before putting in on for him, whilst rolling his eyes. He ignored the groans of frustration and glare that his little brother was currently wearing. Once the shoes were secured on Nick’s feet he tied the laces.  “I would have managed it.” Nick grumbled.   “You want to get home before Christmas, right?” David asked sarcastically. 

Nick just scoffed and crossed his own arms across his chest.  Sarah returned with Beth. She just had to remove Nick’s IV drip and then they could be on their way. Once it was done. She gave Nick a gentle hug. She had become very fond of the teenager over the course of the week.  “You take care of yourself, ok?” She smiled.  “I don’t want to see you back in here.” She added.  Nick gave her a small smile.  “Thank you for everything…” he smiled.  “You don’t have to thank me, love.” Beth returned the smile.  “It’s my job…”  “You’ve been amazing though, so I do.” Nick replied.    “Right!” Sarah said clapping her hands together.  “Shall we get going? We’ve got two giddy dogs waiting at home!” She grinned.  Nick smiled as he slowly stood up from the bed. He was still in a lot of pain when he walked, but he was slowly getting stronger at it.  David collected all the bags while Sarah linked arms with Nick and they walked out of the room, down the corridor and towards the exit. At Nick’s own pace of course.   

Sarah put everything in the boot as David helped Nick in to the car.  “I can fasten my own seatbelt.” Nick whined. “I ain’t five..”  Sarah couldn’t help but roll her eyes at their brotherly bickering. She was just so glad Nicky was coming home.  She remembered when she arrived at the hospital that night. Frantically, abandoning her car outside the hospital entrance and racing inside. She didn’t even know then what state her son was in, all that she knew was he had been assaulted and stabbed and it wasn’t looking good.  Those doctors had performed a miracle. They saved her baby’s life. She was going to be forever thankful for that.  It had been a tough week, but they were going home. Nick was going home.  She couldn’t wait to see Nellie and Henry’s reaction when they saw him.  He knew they’d be demanding all the cuddles.  She had set up a little welcome home surprise. Not much as she knew Nick had to rest. But she’d baked a cake and put up a massive get well soon banner decorated by Charlie and their friends, who were currently hiding in her living room along with Nick’s auntie, uncle, cousins and Tori. Ready to surprise Nick as he arrived home.   She smiled at her youngest son in the mirror as she started up the car.  “Ready, baby?” She smirked. Nick grinned.  “Yeah! Let’s go home…” 

Chapter Text

“Morning, Nicky.” Sarah Nelson smiled as she dished up some breakfast for herself and her son as he entered the kitchen, dressed for school. “Morning, have you seen my rugby kit??” Nick asked. “It’s in the utility room, darling.” Sarah smiled as she placed Nick’s plate and mug on the table. “I’ve washed it for you.” “Thanks mum!” Nick grinned as he went to retrieve it, leaving it by the front door before returning and sitting at the table across from Sarah. “Have you checked your insulin levels, sweetheart?” Sarah asked. Nick just groaned and rolled his eyes. “You don’t have to check in every morning, you know.” He mumbled. Sarah raised her eyebrows. “You know I do, Nicky.” She knew how dangerous it could be for her son to ignore his blood sugars. Nick was a type one diabetic and it was so vital for him to check his glucose levels at regular times throughout the day, especially before he was about to eat. He also had to inject himself with insulin daily as his pancreas didn’t produce enough insulin for his body. Nick groaned loudly as he opened up his phone, navigating to the app which kept a constant check on his levels, linked to a sensor which he had on his upper thigh. This was just part of of his morning routine, following his Type 1 diabetes diagnosis, 3 years ago.

*flashback*

Sarah Nelson pulled up the drive. It had just gone half past 5pm, she had finished work at 5. She tried to get home as quick as possible most nights as she didn’t like leaving Nick alone for too long. Well he wasn’t exactly alone. Nellie was here. Sarah could already hear her border collie barking from inside the house as she locked up her car and walked up the driveway towards the front door. She opened the door and was greeted instantly by Nellie. “Nicky, I’m home..” she called in to the hall. No response, she frowned. She could tell by the lights on in the hall way and the sitting room and the unlocked door as well as the discarded school shoes at the bottom of the stairs that her youngest son was indeed home. Sarah plopped her bag down on the side, bent down to scratch Nellie behind the ears and walked into the living room. “Nick?” She called again, she stopped as she saw her youngest asleep on the couch. She smiled softly, although she wasn’t exactly impressed that her fourteen year old son was napping so late on in the day, before dinner as well. He was going to be up all night at this rate. “Wakey Wakey, Nicky!” She sung, clapping her hands loudly together as she crouched down next to the sofa and shook her son gently on the shoulder, at least he had changed out of his school uniform. He was dressed in jogger bottoms and a hooded sweatshirt. Sarah couldn’t help but notice a bit of a pattern forming here. This wasn’t the first time recently that Nick had fallen asleep after school. She had noticed how much more tired her son had appeared to be lately, his loss of appetite and he had lost a little weight. She hadn’t thought much about it until now. He’d been going to the toilet a lot more frequently as well. She had been beginning to think that maybe she should schedule a routine check up for Nick at their family GP Just to ensure everything was alright. She snapped out of her train of thoughts as she shook Nick again. “Nick, darling? Time to wake up…” She’d make them dinner and then insist on Nick going to bed early and having an early night. She frowned. Nick had made absolutely no effort to wake up. “Nick? Baby?” She reached out to stroke his face. His skin was clammy. She shook him a little harder, beginning to feel a knotting sensation in her stomach. Why wasn’t Nick responding to her? “Nicholas??” She shook him again. She paled. Her little boy was unconscious. He wasn’t responding to her. She jumped up, quickly. Leaping in to action as she grabbed the phone off the holder quickly dialling and putting the phone to her ears.

“Hello 999 what service do you require?” “Hello…my son’s unconscious!! I need an ambulance…”. Sarah replied desperately in to the phone. She needed help. Nick needed help. She tried to keep herself calm as she answered all the questions. Sharing her location and Nick’s full name, age and date of birth. The young girl on the other end of the phone kept her calm and assured her that the ambulance would be with her in a few minutes. She placed the phone on the side as she could hear ambulance sirens outside. She threw open the front door, being met by two paramedics. She watched as her neighbours peered out their windows, wondering what was going on. What was wrong with Nick? Her stomach was in complete knots.

14 year old Nick sat up right in the hospital bed. It had been 3 hours since he had been admitted. He had begun to come around in the ambulance. Completely disoriented and confused and scared. Sarah had held his hand and spoke comforting words to him as the ambulance reached the hospital. He was immediately whisked away for numerous tests, he was stabbed and pricked by needle after needle, he was fitted with an IV drip, where he was receiving fluids. He had been changed in to an itchy hospital gown. He could see his mum standing outside the room, she was talking to a consultant. She was nodding along as the male doctor spoke to her. What were they talking about? Were they talking about him? What was wrong with him? He couldn’t remember much. He got home from school and got changed. He remembered feeling so so tired at school. He remember laying down on the couch and then that was it. The next thing he was aware of was waking up in the back of an ambulance.

Nick’s head snapped up as Sarah re-entered the room. The middle aged consultant following closely behind. Nick noticed that his mum’s eyes were red rimmed. She had been crying. “Mum?” He questioned in a quiet voice. What was going on? Why was he in hospital? “What’s wrong with me?” He asked, his voice trembling. Sarah made her way over to him, she perched herself down on the edge of the bed, reaching out to take his hand in hers. She gave it a gentle squeeze. “The doctors have done some tests, baby…” she started. She rubbed soft circles on the back of his hand. This wasn’t easy. The doctor had offered to tell Nick, but she was his mum. It would be better coming from her. “Your body went in to hypoglycaemic shock.” She told him, giving his hand a little squeeze. “Do you know what that means, baby?” Nick frowned. He had no idea, but it didn’t sound good. “No…” he said quietly. “It means your blood sugar dropped dangerously low.” Sarah explained, she was looking at the consultant for confirmation that she was explaining this correctly. He nodded and ushered her to continue. “Nick, sweetheart…” she started, taking a deep breath. “You have type 1 diabetes…”

Nick’s eyes widened in shock. Diabetes he had heard about that on the tv. He remembered there was a kid in his primary school class who had diabetes, but he didn’t really know much about it. He knew it was a serious condition though. He looked at Sarah with tears in his eyes. “Am I going to die?” He whispered. Sarah felt a lump form in her throat. “No baby, of course not.” She assured him looking at the doctor for some reassurance herself. The doctor placed a hand on Nick’s shoulder. “Type one diabetes is a chronic condition where the pancreas makes little or no insulin.” He began to explain. “Do you know what insulin is?” Nick’s eyebrows threaded together and he shook his head. “Not really..” he said sheepishly. The doctor gave him a small smile. “Insulin is a hormone the body uses to allow sugar, also known as glucose to enter cells to produce energy…” he explained. He wasn’t surprised to see Nick’s confused expression. This was a lot for anyone to take in. Let alone a fourteen year old kid. “I have had a chat with your mum and she explained some concerns she had…” the doctor told him. “How you’ve been very tired recently and urinating more frequently.” Nick’s cheeks flushed red, feeling slightly embarrassed at his mum discussing how many times a day he’d taken a piss with a random stranger. “The unexplained weight loss and increased thirst are also factors related to the condition.” “I have been really thirsty lately.” Nick admitted. It all made sense. He thought he was just going through a phase, even coach singh had commented on how many times he’d refilled his water bottle during rugby practice. “If I didn’t know any better I’d think you were a fish out of water, Nicholas.” Nick looked up at the doctor. This was all so confusing. He didn’t understand it. “So what happens now. Is there a cure?” He asked hesitantly. He saw the uneasy look that crept on to his mother’s face and he suddenly had a weird feeling in the pit of his stomach. The doctor gave him a sympathetic look. “Unfortunately there’s no cure for Diabetes.” He started. Nick paled. He was going to have this condition for ever?? “There is treatment though and no reason why you won’t be able to live a happy, healthy life…” Nick fell against the pillows. He couldn’t believe this. It was so unfair. “Nicky baby.” Sarah sighed, stroking his arm again. “This isn’t the end of the world…I promise.” Nick glanced at his mum. “Will I have to inject myself every day like Kenny Tucker?” He asked referring to his primary school class mate. “Probably, darling…” Sarah glanced at the consultant. She wasn’t really sure what treatment her son would need. “You’ll be required to take daily does of insulin as well as checking your blood sugar levels at regular intervals…I am going to refer you to a Nutritionist dietition who specialises in the diagnoses of diabetes.” He explained as he passed some pamphlets over to Nick. “I know it’s a lot to take in right now but we have lots of qualified professionals here to help explain things and give you a bit more of an understanding of your condition…” He noticed how Nick had sort of zoned out and wasn’t really paying attention anymore. This was a lot for him to consume. “I’ll leave you to rest for now and pop back in later.” He said before giving Sarah one last smile and leaving the room. Nick sunk in to the pillows and closed his eyes. His mind was racing. He had Diabetes. He couldn’t believe it.

*end of flashback*

“I’ve put an extra apple juice in your lunch.” Sarah commented after they’d had breakfast as she closed the fridge. Nick just rolled his eyes as he stuffed the lunch bag in to his backpack and bent down to give Nellie her morning scratches behind the ears.  “Who’s a good girl, eh.” He grinned.   “I’ll be in the car, sweetheart. We’re running a little later this morning..” Sarah announced before swiping her keys and handbag off the kitchen counter.  “You won’t forget to pack your insulin kit will you?” She asked raising an eyebrow.  Nick just rolled his eyes as he picked up his little black case from the table and held it in the air sarcastically.
“Mum I’ve been doing this for years. I know what I’m doing. My glucose levels are good, I did my morning injection before breakfast. I’ll put it in my bag. It’s all sorted. Stop treating me like an idiot!”
Sarah put her hands up in surrender! “I’m sorry baby, I’ll always worry about you. I know you’ve got it sorted.” She smiled at him as she grabbed her bag and headed to the car, “but if you don’t get a move on we are going to both be late!”
Nick grinned at her, then stashed his injection kit in his bag along with his phone. He always had extra snacks in his bag just in case. But it was sweet that his mum insisted he take more juice. She really worried about him especially on days when he was doing a lot of rugby like the match later on after school.

They made it to school just in time and Nick raced into tutor. He collapsed into the seat next to Charlie, who looked up from his work and smiled at him, “cutting it a bit fine aren’t you?” He smirked. Nick bumped his shoulder, “nah, perfect timing!” He looked at Charlie, he couldn’t believe how much his life had changed over the past few months. He had a boyfriend now! The most wonderful, gorgeous, clever, talented boyfriend. It had taken him a while to come to terms with being bi, but now it felt like his life was just beginning. He was so happy. Nick absent mindedly scratched the Dexcom device on his upper thigh. The sticky adhesive was really itching his skin. A wave of guilt came over him. He still hadn’t  told Charlie about his diabetes. He wasn’t sure why really. At first when they were becoming friends it just wasn’t something to talk about. Then as they got closer, it just felt weirder and weirder that he hadn’t told him….and now it was just plain too late. He didn’t want it to become a big deal. He didn’t want Charlie fussing over him like his mum did. Thinking he needed looking after. So he just hadn’t said anything. He knew he’d have to at some point. Realistically he knew that as they became more intimate with each other, his sensor was going to be impossible to hide.
Charlie interrupted his thoughts, “you ok? You seem really distracted.” Nick looked across to see Charlie’s face etched with concern. Maybe he could just get it over and tell him? “ Oh, um yeah I guess I was just thinking….”
“Yeah? What about?” Charlie raised an eyebrow in question.
“Well… I wanted to tell you….”
“Nick and Charlie keep it down please!” Mr Lange bellowed from the front. Nick looked sheepishly at Charlie and then whispered, “it doesn’t matter, it wasn’t important.” He rummaged in his bag for his maths book and started on the homework that he should have finished at home last night, Charlie looked at him curiously. Nick smiled at home reassuringly. “It’s nothing, honest.” He whispered.
The day passed by in a blur of lessons. Nick hurried along to the changing room to get ready for the rugby match after school. He checked his glucose level. 5.4, That was ok maybe a little on the low side. He grabbed the juice from his bag and downed it in one, before stripping out of his uniform and into his rugby kit. He was almost changed before anyone else had even arrived so he took a moment to relax on the bench while he waited for Charlie to get ready. “Looking forward to the game?” Charlie asked him as he laced up his boots. Nick grinned, “yeah, can’t wait. We thrashed them last season so I’m hoping for the same again!” Charlie smiled at him, “I’m glad I’m just the reserve this time, I can stand on the sidelines and watch my hot boyfriend running around!” Nick laughed and pulled him up by the hand. He gathered up his clothes and stuffed them on the bench by his bag. He picked up his small bag that he always left on the sidelines with coach Singh. It had his insulin and some snacks in. He rummaged in his bag for his phone to add to the bag  so his sensor could stay connected and let him know if his sugars were too low. Where was it? He had it a minute ago. He looked around him but it was nowhere to be seen. Shit.
“Come on lads,” Coach Singh called from the doorway. Warm up started 5 minutes ago.” Nicks had one last look before giving up. Oh well, he’d find it after the game. He’d just had some juice and that always sent his sugars sky high for a bit. He’d be fine for the game. He grabbed his water bottle and followed Charlie out onto the pitch.

Nick tossed his water bottle on the sidelines after taking a swig out of it. He felt a little bit fuzzy but didn’t think too much of it. It was the adrenaline of the rugby match.  Coach Singh gave him a thumbs up which he reciprocated before rushing over to join his team mates.  Charlie watched on from the sidelines. He still couldn’t believe Nick Nelson was his boyfriend. Nick Nelson the rugby captain, was his boyfriend.  He felt like the luckiest boy alive.      Nick ran out on to the pitch, her had a glance around. There was his Charlie sitting on the reserve bench. The most beautiful boy in the world. He felt like the luckiest guy ever.  He glanced in to the stands. He spotted his friends first, always as supportive as ever. He glanced a little more to the right. There she was, his mum. What an angel. She’d obviously gotten early leave from work today so that she’d be able to come watch him play. It had been a while since she’d been able to make one of his games so he was so happy she was here.   Nick swung in to action, leading his team in a huddle before the game started.

It was around half way in to the game that Nick started to feel a little faint. He tried to shrug it off.  He wasn’t exactly an expert on his diabetes, only been diagnosed 3 years ago but he was familiar with the feeling of his glucose levels being low. He could feel himself sweating, despite feeling shaky and shivery.  He was beginning to find it hard to concentrate. His head was beginning to feel fuzzy. This wasn’t good. He didn’t even have his phone on him to check his levels. Was his Dexcom even working correctly?  No. He was fine. He’d just drunk some apple juice. This dizzy spell would pass.  He shrugged it off as he was passed the ball. He ran as quickly as he could, dodging the other players that were very much hot his heels. He breathed a sigh of relief as he scored them a try. They were winning but not by much. Nick tried to play through the fogginess. He caught Coach Singh’s worried glance from the sidelines as she motioned. “Are you ok Nick?” He responded with a thumbs up. He was fine.  He was absolutely fine.  Wait a minute. Why was there two of his coach? His vision began to blur, everything felt more intensified, everything felt double as the world seated around him.  “Nick? You okay mate?”   “Nick you don’t look so good!”   “Nick?”  “NICK?”    That was all Nick could hear as his ears began to ring as he lost his balance and went crashing down on to his backside.

“Otis! Can you grab me Nick’s emergency kit, please!!” Coach Singh instructed, pointing towards the sidelines as she dropped to her knees next to Nick just as the other coach rushed towards them, a look of concern on face.  Sai and Christian had already ran off to fetch the school nurse. She knew about Nick’s diabetes as did they as Coach Singh had briefed the whole team in what to do if Nick collapsed or was showing signs of hypoglycaemia. Nick of course hadn’t been too pleased about the situation and had only agreed as long his team mates promised to keep it to themselves and not discuss his condition with anyone else. He wasn’t ready for the whole school to know yet.  Charlie didn’t even know yet.

“Is he okay?” The opposing team coach asked.  “Nick here is type one diabetic.”  Coach Singh explained as she dropped to her knees next to Nick who undoubtedly wasn’t looking too good, at all.   Otis raced over handing her Nick’s emergency kit.  Coach Singh placed her hand on Nick’s shoulders as he was struggling to keep himself sitting up right as he tried to steady his breathing and stop the world from spinning. He knew he was going in to hypoglycaemic shock, there was no doubt about that. He didn’t understand. His levels had been fine earlier on. Why had he been so stupid? He should have just gone to find his phone.    “Nick? Can you hear me, kiddo?”   That was coach Singh’s voice. Nick was finding it hard to concentrate.  His palms were sweating, he felt woozy and sick. He let out a little groan to show that he understood. He wanted to sleep. He was so tired. He felt his eye lids fluttering.  “Keep your eyes open for me, Nick.” He heard coach Singh instruct.  He just felt so sleepy.   He suddenly heard commotion, a very familiar voice as someone else dropped to their knees beside him.  “Nicky? Baby. Where’s your phone?”  His mum.  His mum was here.  Nick tried to speak, but no words came out. Just a little croak.  He his head begin to fall as he tried his hardest to stay sitting up. He just felt so weak. He collapsed into his mum’s open arms. Sleep was sounding more and more enticing as the moments passed.  “Don’t sleep, sweetheart.”    “I don’t know where his phone is.” Coach Singh said as she opened the little black pouch that contained Nick’s emergency insulin and glucose metre.   “He mentioned something about leaving it in the changing room.” Christian responded from the sidelines as he looked on, concern for his mate written all over his face.   Coach Singh’s hands trembled as she used the needle to prick Nick’s finger, using one of the strips to collect a droplet of blood before using the metre to check Nick’s blood sugar levels. 49mg/dL. Her eyes widened. That was dangerously low.  Sarah’s eyes fell on the metre. She felt panic flooding through her body as he eyes landed on Nick’s face. His eyes were closed and he was unresponsive.  “Call an ambulance now!!”

Charlie, meanwhile stood on the sidelines watching on in complete horror. What was going on. The Dexcom. The blood glucose metre.  Nick was diabetic.  Wait a minute. Nick. His boyfriend. Had diabetes and this was only him just finding out. Why hadn’t Nick told him before? This wasn’t a little secret. This was huge.  He felt a little annoyed but that was replaced by concern right away when he realised the seriousness of the situation.

He watched in horror as Coach called for an ambulance. Sarah was jostling Nick, trying to rouse him. “Nicky baby open your eyes, come on, wake up!” She was getting more frantic. Charlie wasn’t sure what to do but he knew he needed to be close to Nick. He crouched down beside Sarah, “is he going to be ok?” He whispered worriedly, his eyes shining with tears. Sarah glanced at him before returning her focus to Nick. “We need to get his levels up, but we can’t if he’s unconscious and can’t drink or eat anything. When did he last eat do you know?” Charlie thought back, did Nick eat anything in the changing room….he didn’t think so.
“Um, I think he had a juice before the game? I didn’t know he was diabetic,” he said guiltily. If he’d have known he’d have made sure he ate before the game. Why didn’t he know? What did that say about their relationship that he hadn’t shared something so big. Fleetingly Charlie thought about how he’d been keeping his eating troubles secret, until Nick had found out in Paris last term.
Sarah stroked Nicks hair, “he doesn’t like people to know about it. I thought he would have told you though,” she admitted, which made Charlie’s heart sink.
Christian came running up with Nicks phone, “I found it under the bench in the changing room,” he panted. Sarah took it and navigated quickly to the app which immediately sounded a warning tone as it picked up Nicks reading. 1.7. That was dangerously low.
Sirens blared as the ambulance came speeding into the car park, and then onto the field, parking at the edge of the pitch. The rest of the rugby team were all huddled together a little distance away, trying to give Nick some privacy but also desperate for news that he was ok. The paramedics jogged up to where the small group were gathered around Nick.
“Right, what’s going on here then?” The younger of the two paramedics, a woman with dark blonde hair tied up in a ponytail asked. “My son is type one diabetic. His sugars are very low, he passed out about ten minutes ago.” Sarahs voice wobbled as she spoke. The paramedics swung quickly into action. “What’s his name?” Asked the Second paramedic, a man with greying hair and a kind smile. “Nick,” Sarah moved out of the way so the paramedics could get to work. They tried to wake Nick, just,like Sarah had. Charlie held his breath as one of the paramedics rushed back to the ambulance. “I’m going to inject him with glucagon,” the paramedic told Sarah. “With any luck that will get his sugars back up enough for him to regain consciousness.” He held out his hand and the second paramedic handed him a syringe. He lifted Nicks shirt and injected the liquid into his stomach. Charlie noticed a few small bruises, where he had obviously injected himself in the past. Again he wondered how Nick had managed to keep this from him. It seemed so obvious now. Nick had always been strict with what he ate and when, he always disappeared to the bathroom before eating. He was obviously injecting his insulin. He felt so stupid for not realising.
Sarah was watching her son for any signs of him coming round. As the seconds ticked by, the paramedics exchanged glances. “Let’s get him on the gurney and into the ambulance.” Sarahs eyes widened. They tried to reassure her. “Hopefully he’ll start to come round as we get going. But he’s been unconscious for a while now so we’ll need to take him in for checks anyway.” They lowered the stretcher and carefully moved Nick onto it. He let out a small groan at the movement. “ ah, there we are. Welcome back young man. Can you hear me?”

Nick felt himself being jostled. He felt completely and utterly exhausted. Opening his eyes was far too much effort. His limbs felt shaky and his head was fuzzy. Where was he? He remembered playing rugby. He remembered feeling like he was having a low….then nothing. He must have passed out. That wasn’t good, he’d never done that before. Well not since he was first diagnosed. He could hear voices around him and let out a groan. Then his mums voice came through the haze, “Nick baby, please open your eyes.” She sounded so worried, he forced himself to open them. His vision was blurry but he could see her hovering over him and he tried to speak, “Mum,” he croaked out. “Sorry.”
“Oh darling don’t apologise,” Sarah could feel the tears pooling on her eyelashes. She was definitely going to give him the world’s longest lecture once he was recovered fully but for now she was just grateful to see his brown eyes looking up at her. He looked over and saw Charlie crouched beside him. His heart sank as he realised his secret was out, and not in the way he had wanted to tell him. Why hadn’t he told him earlier. He knew he needed to speak to him. But before he got chance he felt the gurney moving and he was taken to the ambulance.

Once safely inside, the paramedic stepped out to talk to Sarah and Coach Singh. “Right, mum are you coming with us? “ Sarah nodded. She turned to Coach Singh, “I’ll let you know how he is. Sorry for all the commotion.” Coach gave her a hug. “Wish him a speedy recovery and we’ll see him soon.” She watched as Sarah climbed into the back of the ambulance and it drove slowly off the field. Charlie came to stand beside her. “You ok Charlie? That must have been a bit of a shock for you.”
Charlie sighed, “ I didn’t even know he was diabetic,” his voice quivered. “ why didn’t I know?”
Coach put her arm around him and sighed, “ When Nick was first diagnosed a few years ago he was devastated. He thought he’d never play rugby again. He refused any help for a long time before one game he had a low and needed to be subbed. His teammates demanded he tell them what was wrong. He swore them to secrecy but they’ve been really good over the years at keeping an eye on him.” She sighed again. “It’s been so long since we’ve needed to mention it in training that I guess we all forgot to look out for him.”
She chatted to the coach on the opposing team and they both agreed to abandon the match. None of the Truham boys were in the right mindset to play. So she sent them
to the changing rooms to change and go home for the weekend.
Charlie looked over to the spectators and saw his friends all hovering by the sidelines. He jogged over to them and then enveloped him in a massive hug. “What the hell happened? Nick just keeled over?” Tao looked at him, wide eyed.
“Yeah, so apparently he’s diabetic?” Charlie felt numb. His friends all looked shocked.
“What?” Isaac was the first to speak. “How didn’t we know about this?” Charlie just shrugged. The adrenaline had left and he felt so tired. He just wanted to get changed and be with Nick at the hospital.

Nick did not enjoy the ride in the ambulance. The paramedic made him crunch some glucose tablets as soon as he was conscious enough to chew. He hated them, they tasted like chalk. He felt so tired but they wouldn’t let him close his eyes. He focused on his mum who was holding his hand, murmuring comforting words. He felt the ambulance come to a halt and the doors opened. He was wheeled out and into accident and emergency for assessment.

Charlie just couldn’t believe it. Nick was a diabetic and he never even knew. Why didn’t he know? He was Nick’s boyfriend. He was supposed to know important things like this. Didn’t Nick want him to know? Why?  Suddenly everything started making more sense. He’d always been conscious of the fact that Nick used the toilet a lot. He never ever though about that. Or how Nick would always disappear before eating around him and their friends and how the Nelson’s fridge was always fully stocked of little carton’s of apple juice. He had always assumed it was Nick’s favourite, but this made more sense.  Coach Singh’s words echoed in his mind as he trudged towards the changing rooms to get changed out of his rugby kit. Nick had been diagnosed a few years ago? So this wasn’t a new thing. This was a massive part of Nick’s life and he hadn’t told him about it. Charlie didn’t know how to process this.  He entered the changing rooms, ignoring all the concerned chatter about Nick from all his teammates. He grabbed his bag down from one of the hooks and slid in to one of the cubicles to get changed before anyone started to talk to him. He didn’t really know what to say. His mind was struggling to deal with this new found information but he knew one thing was for sure that he wanted to get to the hospital to see Nick. He needed to make sure he was Ok, but he knew Nick were going to have to discuss this.

Meanwhile at the hospital. Nick’s sugars had been checked again immediately after arriving at the hospital. His glucose levels; thankfully had started climbing again following the injection of glucagon and the glucose tablets. It was still lower than it should be but he was out of the danger zone. The nurse gave him a cup of apple juice and some raisins and instructed he finished it and then they would test his levels again in a further fifteen minutes. He had also had an IV drip inserted in to his forearm as he was extremely dehydrated.  The were in a little side room. Nick had been changed out of his muddy rugby kit and it had been replaced by a light green hospital gown. Nick rested his head against the pillows. He was extremely tired but he had been instructed that he mustn’t fall asleep until they had gotten his blood sugar levels under control as there was still the possibility of him falling into a diabetic coma or having a seizure. Nick knew the drills. He was no stranger to being admitted to hospital because of his diabetes. This was just the first time it had happened since he had met Charlie.  “Drink your juice, Nick.” He snapped his head up to see his mums concerned face. He knew she wouldn’t be satisfied until he’d finished the lot. He gulped down the remainder of the juice, sitting the little cup on his tray before emptying some of the box of raisins out of the box in to the palm of his hand. He grimaced, he hated raisins. There was absolutely no need for dried fruit to be this sweet but they were good for raising a persons blood sugar.  He ate some of them before turning around and looking at Sarah.   “Are you angry with me?” He asked quietly.  Sarah’s head snapped up as she reached out and took Nick’s hand.  “Oh sweetheart, of course I’m not.” She told him as she gave his hand a squeeze. She was aware that she had been quiet since they’d arrived at the hospital but in all honesty she was still reeling.  Her heart had completely stopped the moment she had seen Nick collapse.  She’d noticed that he seemed distracted. She should have known then but the second she saw his legs buckle and his face turn pale, she knew what was happening. She had legged it down from the stands as quickly as she could, pushing past everyone just to get to her son and then the panic in realising that Nick’s dexcom wasn’t working. They’d spent a lot of money on it and she knew it was reliable as it always was able to pick up when his sugars were low, but obviously his phone had been no where to be seen when he had collapsed.  “You just gave me a massive fright, today.”  Nick looked at her sheepishly.  “I’m sorry.” He he said softly.  “I…thought the juice would help.”    “Nicky?” Sarah asked softly.  “Did you know you were running low?” She asked curiously.  Nick sighed. He had just put his foot in it well and truly.   “I felt a little faint in the changing rooms.” He admitted.  Sarah sighed.  “Why didn’t you tell coach?” She wasn’t angry, or disappointed. She was just a concerned mother but she needed Nick to understand the severity of the situation.   “What if coach Singh hadn’t been there with your emergency kit?” She asked him, watching as he sheepishly looked away.  “Nick, you know how important it is to keep on top of your diabetes…It’s not going away, darling…”   “I know!” Nick sighed, frustrated. Not with Sarah, with himself. With having diabetes. He hated it. He hated having to watch what he ate. Having to check everything for the sugar content.  Having to constantly check his dexcom and inject himself with insulin before he ate.  It wasn’t fair, but Sarah hit the nail head on.  His condition wasn’t going anywhere. He would he diabetic for the rest of his life whether he wanted to be or not.

“I will try and be more careful from now on.” He assured Sarah.   “That’s all i ask, baby.” Sarah said as she bent over and kissed him on the forehead.  She wouldn’t stop worrying about Nick. Having diabetes made Nick more at risk of getting sick. Nick had spent many a time in hospital over the past few years due to some sort of infection. Diabetes made it harder for the body to fight of infections and germs.   Nick glanced at his mum, sucking in a deep breath.  “Charlie saw didn’t he???” He asked.  Sarah sighed. She’d knew that would be the only thing on her son’s mind.  “Yes, darling. He knows…”   “He knows I’m diabetic?”  He said questioningly. Sarah nodded.  “He knows the basics darling…”  “is he angry I haven’t told him?” Nick asked, desperately. He couldn’t cope with Charlie being mad at him.  Sarah took his hand and squeezed it again.   “He was very concerned about you…”. “I need to see him!” Nick said eagerly, trying to pull himself up.  “I need to explain, properly..” Sarah gently pushed him back down against the pillows. “No..” she said firmly. “You have to rest.”   Nick just stared at his mum.  Was she crazy?? He couldn’t just lay here when Charlie was probably upset and confused.  He had to put things right. He had to apologise for not being honest. Would Charlie hate him?   He was about to respond when the door opened and in walked the doctor who had been treated him. “Okay young man!” He smiled. “Let’s check these glucose levels again, shall we?” He said, satisfied that Nick had managed to polish off his snack and juice.

The doctor smiled as he read the glucose reading. “Excellent, back in the normal range.” Sarah breathed a sigh of relief and squeeze Nick’s hand. “ thank goodness! Can i take him home now?” The doctor smiled at her kindly. “I think just to be on the safe side we’ll keep him in overnight so we can monitor his levels and make sure he stays stable. He was unconscious for a while so we want to make sure everything is ok.” Nick slumped back and sighed. He wanted to talk to Charlie and now he’d have to wait until tomorrow. “I know you are disappointed baby,” Sarah said after the doctor had left. “But it’s only one night. I’ll pop home and get you some overnight things ok?” Nicks nodded reluctantly. There was no point arguing. It was all his fault for not looking after his diabetes properly. He still felt really tired. Lows always left him exhausted and this was the lowest his readings had ever gone. “Can I have my phone?” He looked over at his mum, “I want to text Charlie, and the rugby lads. Apologise for scaring them.” Sarah smiled at him and fished his phone out of her bag. “Here you go, I’ll be back as soon as I can ok? Just rest.”
Nick took a breath and looked at his phone. His Lock Screen was filled with WhatsApp and instagram notifications. So many people asking if he was ok and what had happened. Shit. He guessed that now everyone at school knew he’d been taken away in an ambulance. He wasn’t going to be able to keep his diabetes a secret anymore. He scrolled to his text chat with Charlie and was devastated to see that he hadn’t messaged him. Was he mad with him? He started typing, but he wasn’t sure how to even start. He didn’t want to have this conversation over text. He settled for writing ‘I’m sorry xx’ and sent the message before he could overthink it any more. He saw the message delivered and read and then the bubbles indicating Charlie was typing he held his breath and waited. And waited. The bubbles kept stopping and starting. Inthe end he tossed his phone down on the bed and closed his eyes. He could feel himself welling up with frustration. And exhaustion.
“Nick?” His eyes flew open and he looked up in shock. There was Charlie, hovering nervously in the doorway. “Um, I wasn’t sure if I should come? But I was so worried and needed to see if you were ok. Then you text and I wasn’t sure if I should reply or just come in, so here I am. “
Nick felt the tears falling as he shuffled himself up in bed. He held out his arms hopefully and Charlie rushed forward and hugged him tightly, mindful of his IV drip in his arm. “I’m so sorry Char,” Charlie held Nick as he cried, feeling his shirt dampen with his tears. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. Please don’t be mad at me.”
He looked up through teary eyes only to find Charlie’s compassionate blue ones looking down at him.
“I’m not mad babe,” Charlie pulled up a chair and sat next to him, holding his hand. “But I’m really confused. You’re diabetic?” Nick nodded. “And I didn’t know? That just seems like such a big thing to keep from me. I thought we shared everything…..after Paris, and you know, everything that happened with me, I thought we told each other stuff.”
Nick took a shuddering breath, “I know.” He said quietly. “ I owe you an explanation,” he squeezed Charlie’s hand, then took a sip of his water before beginning. He told Charlie about first being diagnosed at 14. How scary it had been, how poorly he’d been. How he hated the fact that he had a chronic illness that would be with him for life. How he was determined that nobody knew so they didn’t treat him differently. That he’d sworn his rugby friends to secrecy when they had to be told after he’d had a low at a match.
“When I first met you, we became friends. I didn’t think I needed to tell you. Then…..then when we became boyfriends, I realised I needed to tell you. But it just never felt like a conversation I was able to have…and then it just became too late….i was going to tell you I promise. I almost did this morning in form. I wish I had. I really am so sorry char.” He laid back down, thoroughly exhausted from the word vomit he’d just done.
Charlie listened in shock. He couldn’t imagine how scary it must have been for Nick. In a way, he did understand why he’d kept it secret at first. But it did hurt that he hadn’t told him.
“I think I get it.” He said softly, Nick waited and held his breath. “I’m not going to lie, I am hurt you kept it from me,”. Tears fell down Nick’s cheeks as he listened. “ but I understand what it’s like to feel you can’t talk about something personal….” He thought back to the conversation with Nick in Paris and how hard that had been.” But Nick, we need to be open with each other, this is a huge health issue. I was terrified when you collapsed on the pitch. I didn’t know what was happening.”
“I’m sorry Char, I promise I’m not hiding anything else.” Charlie’s reached over and hugged him. “When you get home, we are going to talk more. You are going to teach me how you manage your diabetes so I can help. I don’t want to baby you or mother you, but I want you to be safe and healthy.”
Nick smiled and nodded at him. “I promise, I have learned my lesson.”
They were interrupted by a porter who arrived with a wheelchair to take Nick up to the ward. “They are keeping me overnight,” he sighed. “Can you come over tomorrow when I’m home?” Charlie nodded and gave him a kiss. “Rest babe, I’ll see you tomorrow. Text me when you are settled in your room ok?” Nick climbed into the wheelchair and sat down with a huff, he was glad he wasn’t expected to walk, he was shattered. He held onto his IV bag as the porter wheeled him away. Charlie watched him go.

Nick spent the night on the ward which he hated. He had to share with 4 other teenagers and it was noisy and busy with doctors and nurses coming and going at all hours so he didn’t sleep well. The diabetic nurse came by in the morning to give him a lecture on remembering to check his insulin levels regularly and suggested he keep his phone on him at all times. He listened to her sheepishly and promised not to ignore his symptoms again. She booked him a check up the following week to see how he was getting on. He felt pretty much back to normal, just a lingering tiredness. He texted the rugby boys to let them know he was ok and received some nice messages back. He knew he needed to let the Paris squad know he was ok so after breakfast while he was waiting to be discharged he opened up the group chat.

Nick: hi guys. Sorry for scaring everyone yesterday. I’m fine now. I guess I should have told you all before that I’m type one diabetic. I know it was stupid to keep it to myself. I am being discharged this morning so I’ll be back at school on Monday.
Elle:Nick! We were so worried. Glad you are ok.
Tara: so glad you are ok Nick. I wish you had told us tho. We could have supported you.
Tao: not your smartest move to keep this to yourself Nicholas.
Elle: Tao! What he means is we care about you and want to be there to help you if you need us.
Tao: yeah….that.
Charlie:glad you are feeling better, I’ll be over later xxx

Nick smiled. It seemed so stupid now that he’d not told his friends. He sent them a heart emoji and switched his phone off as his mum arrived with his discharge papers.
“Come on darling, let’s get you home. A quiet day on the sofa will have you right as rain again.” Nick picked up his bag and followed her out of the hospital. As they drove home he glanced at his mum, “I am sorry mum,” he repeated. She smiled at him, “ I know you are baby. I’ve lectured you enough. Let’s get home, there’s a visitor waiting for you!”
As the parked in the driveway he saw Charlie stood at the door with Nellie at his feet. He rushed out of the car to hug him. He picked him up and squeezed his middle. “Nick! Put me down, you should be taking it easy!” Nick laughed and did as he was told. Sarah brushed past them on her way to the kitchen. “It’s nearly lunchtime boys, shall I fix up some sandwiches?” Nick smiled, “yes please.”
Charlie led him by the hand into the living room. “Right, come on I want to learn everything there is to learn about diabetes. Show me how that thing on your leg works! And oooh let me do your injection!!” Nick hugged Charlie tight, he was so grateful that Charlie was his boyfriend. He spent the next hour showing him how he checked his levels, how to calculate the carbs in his meal and then how to inject himself. “God Nick, this is a lot of responsibility for you. You’ve been doing this since you were 14? That’s amazing.” Nick blushed and looked away. “I’m used to it now, it’s just a part of my day. But I’m glad you know now.” Charlie beamed at him. “I promise I won’t baby you or anything, but I am going to make sure you keep up with your levels.”
“I’m glad to hear it,” Sarah said as she arrived with their lunch. “Nicky you were so silly to keep this from Charlie.”
“I know I know!” Nick put his hands up in surrender. He’d learnt his lesson, having a chronic illness wasn’t something he should keep to himself. He lent his head on Charlie’s shoulder and they relaxed on the sofa. “Let’s watch a movie,” he suggested.
“Anything but Marvel!” Charlie replied.

Chapter Text

J

Sarah stirred Nick’s tea and threw the spoon into the sink. She checked the clock on the kitchen wall. 9.15. Charlie would be here at 10, they were off on a trip to London for the day with their friends. Nick had been talking about it non stop all week. They had plans to do some shopping, be tourists for a bit and they had tickets for the London eye later in the afternoon. He was so excited. She was surprised he’d slept in, she’d half expected to see him up, dressed and ready to go before she’d even got out of bed.
“Nicky?” She called up the stairs. “You should probably be getting up darling if you want to be ready on time for Charlie? I’ve made you a tea!”

Nick heard his mum calling. He groaned, rolled over in bed and opened his eyes groggily. He was so tired. He squinted in the light and checked the time. Shit! He’d slept in, he must have turned his alarm off. He shot up in bed and then stopped as a woozy feeling overtook him. Must have got up too quickly, he thought to himself. He staggered out of bed and into the bathroom, stepping into the shower and letting the steam wake him up. He felt really cold which was odd as it was June and Kent had been suffering a heat wave the past week. He let the water ease his achey body and then got out and dried himself. He changed into shorts, t shirt, and then grabbed his hoody and pulled it on, sighing at the warmth it provided. He glanced in the mirror as he brushed and styled his hair. He looked pale and there were bags under his eyes. His nose felt a bit tingly and his throat was scratchy. Surely he wasn’t getting another cold? He’d only just got rid of the last one!
He made his way downstairs and into the kitchen, gratefully grabbing the tea his mum had made him which was now lukewarm. He swallowed a gulp, noticing that his stomach rolled angrily as he did. He popped some bread in the toaster and started to sort out some snacks for his bag to keep them going for the morning. He rummaged through the snack cupboard for anything that looked appetising. He didn’t like the look of anything. He didn’t fancy chocolate, or anything rich. He threw a couple of bags of crisps in and a bottle of water.
He was tentatively eating his toast when his mum came into the kitchen, carrying a laundry basket . “Ah there you are, sleep ok Nicky?” She glanced over to him. He looked up and she could see how tired he looked. “Oh, yeah fine thanks,” Nick replied as he took another small bite, wincing at the pain in his throat as he swallowed.
“Um, are you feeling ok Nicky? You look a bit pale?”
Nick shrugged, “yeah, it’s just a cold I think. I’ll be fine.” Sarah smiled softly at him, “why don’t you take some cold and flu medicine , you don’t want to feel poorly in London.” Nick smiled at her gratefully and watched as she located the medicine. She popped two tablets out and handed them to him. He downed them with the remainder of his tea. “You all set for your trip darling?” Nick grinned at her, “yeah we are meeting everyone at the station at 10.15. I can’t wait!” He had visions of walking hand in hand with Charlie through London and sharing a romantic kiss at the top of the London eye. They had been planning this day out for weeks and he was determined it would be perfect.
Nick put his plate and mug in the sink and went upstairs to finish getting ready. He was just brushing his teeth when the doorbell went and he heard his mum letting Charlie in. He rushed downstairs, ignoring the dull thumping of his head as he did so and threw himself at Charlie, wrapping him in a big hug. Charlie chuckled, “morning babe,” he hugged Nick back, “Morning Char, you ready to go?”
Nick pulled away and grabbed his shoes. Charlie stared at him. “Um babe it’s a bit warm for a hoodie?” He looked carefully at him and took in his pale face and the circles under his eyes. “You ok?” Nick looked down at his clothes. He was absolutely freezing. “Oh. Yeah I’m just a bit cold. I’ll tie it round my waist if I get too hot or stuff it in my bag.” He laced up his vans and grabbed his bag.
“Bye mum!” He yelled, taking Charlie’s hand and leading him towards the station.

Sarah watched her son leave. She couldn’t help the niggling feeling in the pit of her stomach. She hoped Nick wasn’t getting ill again. He had only just recovered from a bad cold that had been doing its rounds in Truham a few weeks ago.  He was fine. Nicky would tell her if he felt really poorly, wouldn’t he?

Charlie and Nick walked to bus stop in record time to catch the bus that would get them to the train station in time to meet their friends. Charlie couldn’t help but shoot Nick a sideward glance every now and then. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it but something just didn’t seem right. Nick couldn’t help it as a little sneeze escaped his nose as they walked. Luckily he was able to catch it in his elbow. He scrunched his nose up. It tickled.  “Bless you.” Charlie commented. “You sure you’re okay?” He asked. Concern thick in his voice. Nick seemed off.  His boyfriend just smiled. “It’s just hayfever…” he lied. What a lame cover up. He thought to himself but he knew for a fact that if Charlie knew that he wasn’t feeling very well then he would put his foot down.  Charlie glanced at Nick. Hayfever? Since when did Nick suffer from hayfever.  “I didn’t know you had allergies..” Charlie questioned. Nick just shrugged like it was no big deal.  “I guess it’s never come up in conversation before.”  Charlie just shrugged in response, believing him as they arrived at the bus stop.   Nick sat by the window on the bus, shivering, he wrapped his hoodie tightly around his frame.   His throat burned every time he swallowed. He felt congested.  He was so so cold, but he felt warm and clammy. Nick leaned his forehead against the cold glass of the window.  “Nick?”  He squinted his eyes open and lifted his head up as he glanced at Charlie. His boyfriend’s face was crinkled in concern.  “Are you feeling ok?” Charlie asked him, reaching out to touch Nick’s skin but his boyfriend was too quick and pulled away.  “I’m fine, char…” he smiled, flashing Charlie his most convincing smile.  Charlie, wasn’t convinced though but not wanting to push things he just smiled and nodded.  “I can’t believe you’re wearing a layered jumper in this heat.” He rolled his eyes playfully.  “I’m cold.”   Charlie couldn’t help but frown a little. He knew for a fact that Nick usually ran warm. He, himself was normally the cold one, but even he was sweltering in the burning June heat.    “I can’t wait for London.” Nick grinned.  “I’ve never been on the London eye before…”  Charlie smiled. “Never?”  Nick shook his head.  “My nan took me and David to London when I was little…I was too afraid to go on it.”  Charlie smirked.  “Nicholas Nelson afraid?…of heights!” He chuckled.  Nick just rolled his eyes.  “Not anymore.”   Charlie just smiled.  “It will be a great day.”

They got off the bus just outside the train station. Nick took Charlie’s hand and lead him inside and towards the platform for the London train where he had agreed to meet up with all their friends. They could literally hear them before they saw them as they reached the platform. The entire Paris squad enveloping them in a massive group hug.  “Paris squad day out!!” Darcy chanted as she fist pumped the air.  “London won’t know what’s hit it, with us lot.” Tara giggled as she wrapped her hands around Darcy’s waist.   “I have got snacks!” Imogen grinned as she held up a bag.  “I stopped at the corner shop.” She announced.  “I got everyone’s favourite’s.” She smiled as she started dishing them out. Pickled Onion monster munch for Darcy. Starburst for Tara. Dairy milk Oreo chocolate for Nick and so the list goes on.  “You shouldn’t have, Imogen.” Nick smiled as he accepted his chocolate bar. He had zero appetite today, not even for his favourite chocolate bar.  His throat felt scratchy again, like a cough was threatening to explode from him. His body felt achy, he definitely had a headache and his tummy felt a little sore. This wasn’t happening. Not today of all days. He’d been so excited for this trip.

“Are you ok, Nick?” Elle commented.  “You look like death warmed up…”   Nick frowned. “I’ve never understood that. How can death be warm? Wouldn’t you be cold because you would be, like dead.” He replied with a shrug.  Tara chuckled at her friend.  “It’s an expression, Nicholas..” she smirked. “You’re shivering. Are you ill?”  She observed.   Nick glanced at her. He shook his head quickly.  “No…” he smiled trying to assure her as well as himself.  “It’s just cold.”   “It’s literally 100 degrees outside.” Darcy replied rolling their eyes. “It’s not that hot.” Nick shrugged, realising he was evidently losing this battle with his friends. He wasn’t going to spoil their fun just because he has a little cold.   “You look pale.” Tara commented. His skin was paler than his normal complexion. It made his auburn hair and freckles stand out even more.  He looked tired and had dark bags under his eyes.  “You don’t look well.” Sahar chimed in, studying her friends face  Nick just rolled his eyes. “I’m absolutely fine.” “You seem poorly.” Ellie told him as she took a closer look at him.  “Stop fussing! Im fine.” Nick mumbled as their train pulled up on the platform. Nothing was going to spoil this outing. But he appreciated the genuine concern from the girls. It showed that they really cared but he would not be responsible for his friends having to cut their fun short.

The train was busy, full of other tourists off to visit the sights and sounds of London so they all split up to find seats. Nick spotted 2 seats next to each other and quickly nabbed them, pulling Charlie along by the hand. “Nice work babe!” Charlie grinned at him. Nick smiled back and collapsed into the seat by the window. He couldn’t deny any longer that he really didn’t feel very well. But there was no way he was spoiling the group day out. He just needed a little nap on the train to sort him out. He shivered slightly which caught the attention of Charlie. “Are you sure you are ok Nick?” He asked him again. Nick sighed, “ yeah honestly, it’s just a cold I think. I’m fine. I might have a little sleep on the train though!” Charlie smiled, although Nick was a big baby with a cold that wasn’t anything to worry about. “Fair enough! I’ll listen to some music for a bit.”
Nick closed his eyes and leaned against the window. His head was pounding. He let the motion of the train lull him into a restless sleep. Before he knew it Charlie was shaking his shoulder. “We are nearly there babe, time to wake up.” Nick wiped the drool from his face and struggled to open his eyes. It was so bright. He fished in his bag for his sunglasses and put them on, which helped a bit. He could feel Charlie’s eyes on him so he forced a smile. “That was a great nap!” He lied, “I feel much better now.” Charlie was not convinced at all but kept quiet for the moment. The train pulled into London Bridge station and they all piled out of the train, gathering on the platform.
“Where first!” Squealed Darcy. She was jumping up and down with excitement. Tara laughed at her enthusiasm. “How about Borough market? I’m starving and it’s just round the corner!” Everyone agreed and the gang headed over to the market which was already jam packed with tourists. There were queues for all the stalls and they wandered between each one. Nick was holding on to Charlie tightly. He felt so woozy. The crowds weren’t helping, he felt both hot and cold and claustrophobic as they made their way to the coffee stand. “I need caffeine!” Charlie told him, joining the back of the queue. “And maybe a pastry. “ what about you?” He looked over at Nick, who had a sheen of sweat on his forehead and looked almost grey. “Nick?” Nick snapped his head up and,looked at Charlie. “Oh, um, I’m not that hungry. Maybe a juice?” Charlie didn’t like the sound of that. Nick was always hungry and could eat anytime, anywhere. “You sure? My treat!” That made Nick feel guilty. He looked over at the cakes on offer. Maybe he could manage a small one, it might perk him up at bit. “Oh go on then, maybe a croissant?” Charlie grinned at him. “Excellent. You find somewhere for us to sit and I’ll bring them over.” Nick scanned the area. There weren’t any free tables but he found some space over by the wall in the corner and sank down onto the floor. It was nice to be out of the crowds for a bit. Charlie watched Nick sitting on the floor. He did not look well. He decided to investigate a bit and texted Sarah.

Charlie: hi Sarah. Sorry to text I just wondered if Nick was ok this morning? He doesn’t seem very well but he says it’s just a cold.
Sarah read the message and replied straight away.
Sarah: oh dear. I thought he looked poorly this morning but he was adamant he was fine. Is he ok? Does he need to come home?
Charlie sighed. It was so typical of Nick to keep feeling poorly to himself. He hated being a burden or a nuisance to anyone. There’s no way he’d agree to going home early.
Charlie: I’ll keep you updated. He says he’s fine but I’ll try to look after him.
Sarah:thank you Charlie, you are an angel. Make him take more tablets. I put some in his bag just in case.

Charlie brought the food and drinks over to Nick. “Here you go,” he handed him a paper bag with the croissant in and a bottle of orange juice. Nick opened the juice and took a large gulp. It soothed his sore throat. “Thanks Char,” he smiled at him, then opened the bag and tore a piece of the pastry off. He chewed it slowly, wincing as he swallowed. “Your throat hurts doesn’t it?” Charlie was observing him. “Um, yeah a bit but it’s fine,” Nick rushed to reassure him. “Do you have more cold and flu in your bag?” Nick opened the zippy pocket at the front and pulled out the blister pack. He popped two tablets and swallowed them down with his juice. They enjoyed sitting together for a few peaceful minutes before the rest of the squad found them.
“There you are!” Imogen grabbed Charlie’s hands and pulled him up to standing. “ we’ve been looking for you everywhere! It’s time to hit Oxford street for some shopping!” Nick felt his heart sink as he stood up. He really didn’t fancy that. But he wasn’t going to be the one complaining. They all made their way to the tube station and down to the platform. The wall of heat that hit them made everyone grumble. “Oh my god why is the tube always so hot,” sahar moaned. Tara agreed, “ I know, it’s always boiling hot and you are crammed in like sardines, I hate it!” They glanced over to Nick who was still bundled up in his hoodie and shivering slightly. “Nick, you can’t still be cold surely?” Nick tried to control his tremors. He wasn’t sure he was cold. He was sort of both? Though he wasn’t sure how it was possible to be both hot and cold at the same time. He realised that he was drawing attention to himself so he stripped off his jumper and put it in his bag. “Babe, you are so sweaty!” Charlie’s exclaimed as he took in the sweat patches on Nicks t shirt. “Oh, yeah, guess I was warmer than I thought….” Nick heard the sounds of the train approaching, “trains coming,” he announced, trying to change the subject.
The tube ride was not fun for Nick. It was cramped and hot and smelly and it made him feel really sick. He was so relieved when they finally climbed the steps out of the station and onto Oxford street. He was glad for his sunglasses as he squinted in pain at the bright light. He just wanted to sit down. Not traipse up and down Oxford street along with thousands of other people.
“So, what’s the plan?” Tao asked, hand in hand with Elle. “Why don’t we split into groups, who wants to go clothes shopping?” Elle, Imogen and Tara set off together to do some shopping. Tao, Darcy, Sahar and Charlie wanted to look in the music shops. Isaac wanted to head for Waterstones. Nick thought a book shop sounded like the most relaxing option so he offered to keep Isaac company. “You sure babe?” Charlie looked worried, he didn’t want to be away from Nick when he looked unwell. “Shall I come with you?” Nick shook his head, “ no! You have been looking forward to hitting the record shops all week. Me and Isaac will be fine won’t we?” Isaac grinned at him. Nick felt his phone vibrate and was distracted replying to his mum so didn’t see Charlie take Isaac to one side and whisper to him, “I don’t think he feels very well. Keep an eye on him for me will you? Text me if there’s any problem?” Isaac promised to keep an eye on him and the group split up, with plans to meet back at this exact spot in an hour.

Issac glanced at Nick as they navigated through the busy streets of London towards the street that Waterstones was on. He couldn’t help but glance at Nick, every now and then. Just realising how unwell the older boy actually appeared.  His skin was chalk white almost ghostly like, although his cheeks had a rosy tint to them as if he was running a fever. His eyes were glassy, he had deep, dark bags under them. He was sure he heard Nick sniffing every few minutes as well, like he was congested. He didn’t look good at all. He should he wrapped up in his duvet in bed at home, not traipsing around London.  “Nick?” Issac asked cautiously stopping abruptly, spinning around and looked at his friend, properly.   “Yeah?” Nick replied, wincing at how noticeably hoarse his voice suddenly sounded. Issac noticed the raspiness in his friends voice as well. Nick shot him a questioning look to as why they had stopped in their tracks.   “You’re not feeling well, are you?” Issac asked. Issac was a good observer. He could always tell when something was wrong.   “I’m fine…” he started to say but was caught off guard by a hacking cough. He winced, his throat burning as he fell into a fit of hard, chesty sounding coughs.

Nick couldn’t deny it any longer. He felt like shit. That was the only way to describe it. He felt shit and miserable. The world felt like it was spinning around him, he felt shivery one minute and then roasting hot the next, his throat was sore, his chest was tight, he couldn’t stop coughing and sneezing, his head was pounding and he felt like he could throw up any minute. He glanced at Issac, as he huddled his hoodie closer to himself.  “I feel terrible…” he croaked out.   “I can tell.” Issac said observantly, giving him a sympathetic look. How Nick had managed to pull himself out of bed this morning when he was evidently feeling so poorly, he’d never know. He wouldn’t haven’t been able to drag himself out of the house let alone to London.  Nick glanced at his Isaac, his brown eyes brightly shining with fever.  “Please don’t tell Charlie…” he said hoarsely. The last thing he wanted was Charlie worrying about him, because he knew he would and Nick would feel too bad that Charlie’s fun day that he had been looking forward to for weeks had been spoiled.

“I think he will be able to tell.” Issac responded, giving his friend a pointed look.  “You look poorlier than ever.” He commented.  Nick sighed as he collapsed down on to a bench. He needed a little rest.   “Please?” He asked glancing up at Isaac. “Don’t tell him…he will only fret and he’s been looking so forward to today.” Nick said before coughing into his elbow. It sounded wet and chesty and painful. Issac winced.  Nick wasn’t well, not in the slightest.  “Nick! You’re sick. You look dreadful.” He said and then sighed. Nick looked like a sad, sick little puppy.  “Charlie will spot that you’re poorly a mile away.” He sighed, noticing the feverish looking in Nick’s eyes. “Do you have a fever?” He asked.  Nick looked up at him and shrugged.  “No…I don’t think so.” He said. Issac cocked his eyebrow, tilted his head and gave him a look that said. ‘Are you sure?’   Nick sighed. Issac was most definitely on to him. He hadn’t thought about it until but he busy most probably running a temperature. That would explain why he was struggling to regulate his body temperature. One minute he was freezing cold. The next he was boiling hot. He felt sweaty and shivery at the same time.  Issac gave him a wondering look before hesitantly reaching out and placing the back of his hand against Nick’s warm forehead. He winced at the heat radiating through the other boy. “Jesus! You’re burning up, Nick..” he commented lifting his hand away and looking at his friend in concern. Nick just let out a little groan and he leaned back against the bench. He felt absolutely exhausted. His whole body was aching. He wanted more to curl up and sleep but that really wasn’t an option right now.  “I took some cold and flu tablets a while ago…they’ll kick in soon.”    Issac sighed. Not convinced.  Nick should he tucked up in bed in this state, not being a tourist in the busy streets of London.   He glanced around and spotted a Boots, located just behind them.  “Wait here.” He instructed. Nick gave him a questioning look but Issac had already turned and walked towards the shop entrance.

Issac marched straight towards the healthcare aisle.  He had already collected a basket at the entrance of the store.  He began filling his basket with sick day essentials. Including 2 packets of tissues, some throat lozenges, a tub of vapour rub and a decongestant nasal spray. He added in a bottle of water before  making his way over to the tills. Whilst in line. Issac pulled out his phone. He hesitated for a moment. Charlie had asked him to keep an eye on Nick and let him know if he seemed unwell. Nick had asked Issac not to tell Charlie. He didn’t want to betray Nick, but any one could see that Nick wasn’t feeling well. He wouldn’t be a very good friend if he just ignored that. He sent a quick message to Charlie.

‘You were right. Nick’s is  not very well, at all🤒’  He sent the message before purchasing his items and returning to Nick. He thrust the paper bag in to his friends lap.  Nick raised his eyebrows.  “What’s this?”     “Supplies so that you don’t keel over.” Issac responded watching as Nick reached into the bag, right away he pulled out the Honey and lemon flavoured lozenges, unwrapped one and popped it in to his mouth, feeling instant relief as it began to soothe his sore throat.  Issac glanced at his watch. They still had around 45 minutes until they had agreed to meet back up with everyone.  “Why don’t we head to Waterstones? It’s quiet in there. You can rest for a bit?” He suggested. Nick smiled and nodded, he pulled himself up on to his feet. Swaying a little as a spell of dizziness hit him. He managed to compose himself and followed Issac down the road.  “How much do I owe you?” He asked, croakily.  Isaac just rolled his eyes.  “Nothing.” He replied firmly.  He knew Nick would do the same.  Nick felt instant relief when he saw the Waterstones in sight. He just needed to sit down for half an hour, drink some water and trying to reserve all his energy. He was going to need it in order to get through the day.

Meanwhile. Charlie, Tao, Sahar and Darcy were browsing the records in a vintage music shop. HMV on Oxford street had been a success and he had treated himself to two new records and a set of galaxy patterned drumsticks. He’s been saving up his allowance especially for this day out.   Sahar glanced at Charlie as she browsed throw sections R, S, T, U. Rifling through hundreds of Vinyl records.  “Nick is sick, isn’t he?” She asked. Charlie glanced up. Had they all noticed that Nick wasn’t feeling good.  “Yes!” Darcy chipped in. “He’s definitely poorly. His face was almost the same shade green as Tao’s jacket…” she commented.   “Nick’s unfortunate health is not an excuse to slate my fashion choices.” Tao chucked, rolling his eyes but then Charlie a more serious look.  “Why won’t he just admit that he’s ill?”  Charlie sighed and shrugged.  “Because it’s Nick and he’d rather drag his sorry, poorly backside around all day than spoil our fun.”   “He can’t help it if he’s not feeling well?” Sahar replied. “Exactly!” Charlie sighed. “Try telling Nick that.  He’s too stubborn.”   “He should be at home.” Darcy said as she picked up an album that she had been looking for, for the longest time. She’d definitely be purchasing that.  Charlie’s phone pinged and he glanced at a notification from Isaac confirming what he already knew.  “Issac’s just confirmed it. He’s not well, not in the slightest.”

They paid for their purchases and still had enough time to pop into a juice bar for a refreshment before beginning to walk towards the meeting point that they had all agreed on.

Nick was huddled on a sofa in the small cafe at the back of Waterstones. He’d ordered himself a cup of tea which he hadn’t touched and was making the most of the peace and quiet while Isaac wandered around the book store with an ever growing pile of books in his arms. He kept periodically checking on Nick. He was really worried about him. He was no doctor obviously but it was clear that Nick was getting worse by the second. After paying for his books, he walked over to Nick and gently tapped his shoulder. Nick jumped up, opened his eyes blearily, wincing at the light. “Hey Nick. We need to leave now to meet up with the others. How are you feeling?” Nick plastered on a very fake looking smile. “Yeah, better thanks, “ he lied. “Let’s go.” They made their way slowly up to Oxford street where they could see the others waiting on the corner for them. Nick could feel the world darkening around the edges as his dizziness overtook him. He stumbled and grabbed onto Isaac’s arm. “Shit, sorry,” he blushed as he let go. “Wasn’t looking where I was going. “ Isaac smiled at him kindly. “No problem!” They reached the others and Charlie was instantly by his side. He looked at Isaac who mouthed at him, “he needs to go home.” Charlie nodded and grabbed nick by the hand. “Right, babe, this is ridiculous. You aren’t well. Why can’t you just admit it.” Nick sighed. He didn’t think he could keep this up much longer but he was so desperate for them to have their romantic moment on the London eye. “I’m fine Char, it’s just a cold, honestly. I had a sit down in Waterstones, I feel better now.” Isaac scoffed next to him. “Nick, you look like death warmed up.” Nick looked around at his friends who were all looking at him with a mix of sympathy and concern. “Nick. We can come to London again another day,” Tara squeezed his arm. “We don’t mind going home early.”
“NO!” Nicks raised his voice, then winced as throat burned. “Sorry, but I’m not ruining this day for everyone. I’ll be fine.” He looked determinedly at them. “Come on, our tickets for the London eye are in an hour so we should get going.” He set off towards the tube station. Charlie glanced at their friends. “Guys, leave it with me, I’ll get him home. You stay and have fun. He’ll never agree to coming home if you all cut your day short too.” They all nodded reluctantly. Nick was such A people pleaser, he would never want to upset their plans. “You head off to the London eye, I’ll text you when we are on the train home.” He marched after Nick, who was leaning against a phone box. He had his eyes closed and his breathing was shallow. “Babe, please can I take,you home? Just me and you?"

Nick didn’t dare open his eyes. The world was spinning so fast he knew he was going to throw up. His stomach churned. His head was throbbing, his throat raw. He couldn’t stop shivering despite the heat. He felt completely miserable. Keeping his eyes closed he finally nodded his head in defeat. “I don’t feel very well….” He whispered. Charlie’s heart broke. “Oh babe, I know you don’t. Let’s get back to the train station and get on the train home.” The thought of the tube made Nick want to cry. “I don’t think I can move,” he groaned. Now that he’d finally admitted to Charlie that he wasn’t well, he could give up the pretence. Charlie sighed. Getting Nick home wasn’t going to be easy. “I know babe, but we can’t stay here.” He thought for a moment. He still had some money left he was going to spend on food later. He looked up and saw a taxi approaching and immediately waved it down, “come on, let’s get you home.” Charlie led Nick to the waiting black cab and helped him into the back. “Char, we can’t afford a taxi,” Nick croaked out. He leaned against the window and closed his eyes. “It’s fine. I have some cash left over. This way we’ll be at the station in no time.” Charlie brushed Nicks sweaty fringe out of his eyes, wincing at the heat radiating off his boyfriend. He sent a quick text to Sarah to let them know they were coming home early and he’d text when they were on the train. Nick tried to hold onto the contents of his stomach as the taxi nipped down side streets on the way to London Bridge station. He had his head in his hands, feeling the comfort of Charlie’s hand on his back, rubbing gentle soothing circles. “Almost there Nick.” Charlie said softly. Nick just grunted back. He felt the taxi come to a stop, then immediately opened the door and threw up all over the pavement. “I’m glad he didn’t do that in my taxi,” grumbled the driver.
“Oh babe,” Charlie quickly paid him and helped Nick out of the car, sidestepping the puddle of vomit as they left. Nick had tears in his eyes, he was so embarrassed. He could see people staring at him, whispering to each other about what they had just seen. He felt so unwell, the dizziness was threatening to overtake him. He stumbled away from the taxi and onto a bench by the bus stop outside the station. Charlie handed him a bottle of water and he took a small sip, trying to rid the horrible taste from his mouth, “I’m so sorry, that was so gross,” he whispered.
“Do you feel any better now you’ve been sick?” Charlie asked hopefully. “No,” Nick sighed. “If anything I feel worse now.” Charlie sighed. He checked his phone for the next train to Truham, they had 15 minutes to get to platform 7. This was not going to be easy. He eased Nick up off the bench and put his arm around him. Slowly they made their way across the station and onto the platform just as the train pulled in. Nick had his eyes closed and was leaning his weight heavily on his boyfriend. He felt awful, he wanted his bed, his mum and his dogs. As soon as the train had emptied of passengers they climbed aboard, finding a table of 4 empty. Nick laid down as much as he could across two chairs, his hoodie bundled up as a make shift pillow. He was shivering and sweating. “It’s probably ok to take more cold and flu meds don’t you think?” Charlie looked at him, concerned. Nick nodded, “ I think I’ll just throw them up though so I’ll wait till we get home.”

Charlie glanced at Nick as his eyes fluttered closed as the train began to move. He looked so poorly.  He was shivering, although his hair was soaked with sweat, his skin was pale with a greyish tint to it, although his cheeks were flushed red with the fever he was evidently running.  He quickly sent Sarah a quick message to let her know that they were on the train, heading back to Truham, he received a message back within a few minutes.

Sarah:  I will meet you both at the station. It will save you having to get on the bus. How is Nick feeling?x

Charlie smiled softly. Sarah was a literal angel in disguise. He glanced at Nick who was dozing. He must feel really ill to be able to sleep as the train was very noisy. He could hear the congestion pouring out of his boyfriend as he snored gently, his mouth open a little. Every now and then he would let out a chesty, wet sounding cough. That didn’t sound good, at all. Nick was probably suffering at the hands of a heavy flu.  He tapped away on his phone as he replied to Sarah.

Charlie: Are you sure? I can message you when we’re about 15 minutes away. He’s really not feeling well at, all. He’s been sick.

He took a a snapshot of Nick and sent it to Sarah who, again, replied instantly.

Sarah: Oh dear! He looks poorlier than ever. Is he running a fever? He looks flushed. Is he sleeping? Did he take the pills i packed for him? Has he been drinking fluids?

Charlie couldn’t help the little smile that tugged at the corners of his mouth as he read Sarah’s motherly ramblings. Although he did feel a little pang of jealously in his chest, but only for a split second.  He wished his own mother was like this when he was feeling poorly. Her solution was sending him to bed with a hot water bottle and some paracetamol. Sarah was completely different from his mother. She was such a hands on motherly, caring mum.  He loved his own mother but sometimes he wished she could just be a little less Jane Spring.  He began typing back, giving her a detailed update of her son’s current health, or should he say lack of.  He paused for a second as he stood up and reached over the table, he gently placed the back of his hand on Nick’s forehead as he slept, being careful not to disturb him. Nick stirred a little but didn’t wake. Charlie winced at the heat he felt against Nick’s skin. He felt like a furnace. The temperature radiating off his boyfriend wasn’t normal. He felt a worrying feeling in the pit of his stomach. How had Nick gotten so poorly? Charlie felt guilty, he should have put his foot put down this morning. He could tell Nick wasn’t feeling well. Why had he let him come all the way to London? Nick probably wouldn’t have been in this state if he had just spoken to Sarah.

Charliie: He’s really not well, Sarah. Definitely running a fever… he’s been adamant he’s fine all afternoon🥺 although he finally admitted to me how poorly he’s feeling. He’s really congested and his cough doesn’t sound good at all. He’s really chesty and sleepy. He’s dozed off on the train. He took some cold and flu earlier but I’m 99% he’s thrown it all back up. He’s struggling to keep water down. I’m really worried about him…

Charlie sent the the as he heard a soft moan coming from across the table.   He glanced over to see that Nick has shifted up right, he was blinking his eyes, a sleepy, feverish look clouding them. His hand was firmly clamped around his stomach and he looked like he was trying his hardest not to projectile vomit everywhere.   “Char…” Nick said in a quiet whisper, which was barely audible. Charlie was just able to make him out.  “I feel sick.” He whimpered, his knuckles turning white as his grip on his tummy tightened.  Charlie’s eyes widened. This wasn’t good. This wasn’t good at all. They were on a moving train. Nicks eyes matched the same panicked look at his.   “Shit.” Charlie said under his breath.   Nick could feel his belly begin to flip again. He knew he was going to be sick again and there was no avoiding it. He could taste the sour taste in his mouth. He had to get to a toilet.  Fast. Charlie was standing in front of him in an instant, extending out a hand as he glanced down the carriage. there was a toilet just at the end.  “Come on.” He said as he took Nick by the hand and began to lead him towards the train toilet. Luckily it was unoccupied. Nick flung the door open and raced inside, throwing himself down on to his knees just in time for a fountain of vomit to erupt from him, luckily he got most of it in the bowl. Charlie closed the door and crouched down next to Nick, rubbing comforting circles on his back as his boyfriend got sick right in front of his eyes.   “That’s it baby, just get it all up.” He soothed.  “You’ll feel so much better for it.”  Nick blinked back tears are the stomach acid burned at his throat. His stomach was cramping as he threw himself forward again, puking his guts up.  He felt sicker than he’d ever felt in his entire life.  His stomach was aching, his head pounding. His face was a right mess of tears, vomit and snot. How attractive.  He couldn’t stop shivering. Charlie rubbed his arms.  “You cold?”  Nick shook his head. He didn’t feel cold, he felt hot, too hot but he felt shivery. It didn’t make any sense. He just felt so poorly.  He finished throwing up after a few minutes and  collapsed on to his backside as Charlie unscrewed the lid of a water bottle that he had swiped out of his backpack as they rushed towards the toilet.  “Small sips..”  “No.” Nick said quietly as he shook his head.  “I don’t want any.”  He was scared to put anything else in his stomach in case he puked again.  “You need to stay hydrated, love.” Charlie sighed as he pushed the water bottle in to his hands. “Please? For me?” He asked, a hopeful glint in his eye.  Nick glanced at Charlie. How could he say no?  He didn’t want anything but he shakily reached out, bringing the bottle of Evian to his lips. He used a little to rinse his vomit coated mouth out, swishing it around before spitting it in to the toilet. He then proceeded to take a few sips of the water. They sat in silence for a couple of moments until Charlie broke the quietness. “You feeling well enough to return to our seats?” He asked.   Nick nodded softly as he pulled himself on to his feet with Charlie’s help as he felt a little wobbly, the world felt like it was turning. They returned to their seats and Nick collapsed into his seat. He closed his eyes as he lay his forehead against the window. He let out a sign of relief as the cold glass felt nice against his burning skin.   “Your mums going to meet us at the station.” Charlie explained as he glanced at his phone. “We should be arriving in Truham in half an hour..”  Nick just nodded, sleepily. Hopefully he would be able to refrain from projectile vomiting again for the remainder of the journey.

Charlie kept a watchful eye on Nick who had fallen asleep again, his forehead pressed against the glass window. He could hear the raspiness in his chest as he slept. He could hear the wheezing and crackles as Nick breathed in and out. He was really ill.  He was starting to think maybe his boyfriend needed to see a doctor. This seemed a lot worse than just a little flu.  Maybe nick needed antibiotics? He knew the older boy would kick up a fuss but he always knew that knowing Sarah as well as he did, she would take one glance at her son and agree with him.

Charlie sent Sarah a message when they were around 10 minutes away from Truham. He moved so that he was sitting next to Nick and reached out running his fingers through his hair.  “Nick? Babe?” He said softly. He didn’t want to wake Nick up. He seemed to be sleeping peacefully, but they needed to get off the train soon. Nick left out a groan but made no effort to open his eyes.  “You need to wake up.” Charlie told him.  “It’s almost our stop.”   Nick let out another croaky groan as he forced his eyes open. He thought he’d feel better after a little nap. Nope! He felt ten times worse if that was even possible. Charlie noticed that he seemed to be shivering uncontrollably so he helped him out his jumper on before ensuring they had all of their belongings as the train pulled in to the station.   Nick was desperate now to get home and crawl in to bed, so he could bury himself under his duvet and try and sleep whatever this was, off.

“Oh Nicky…” Sarah muttered to herself as she spotted the boys approaching her car as she sat outside the station in her car, waiting for them.  She quickly got out as they reached the car. She couldn’t stop the gasp that left her lips as she studied her son’s face.  He looked ghostly pale. His eyes were glassed over. His cheeks were red, his nose was running. He was shivering.   “Oh baby you’re not well at all, are you.” She soothed as she brought her hand up, placing the back of it on her son’s forehead and hissing at the heat she felt against her skin as she dragged her fingers down his cheek and his neck. “You’re burning up, sweetheart.” She said in a concerned tone.  Nick was about to reply by he ended up falling in to a fit of chesty coughs. Sarah winced.  It sounded painful.  “I don’t like the sound of your chest, baby.” She sighed as she slipped his backpack off his shoulder.    Nick practically collapsed in to his mum’s open arms. He just needed a cuddle. He needed her to make him feel better. Sarah could feel her baby trembling in her arms as the shakes ploughed through his body.  He was as sick a dog.  “Let’s get you in the car, darling.” She soothed as she guided him towards the passenger seat. Helping him sit down and buckled him in as his hands were shaking too much. Nick instantly sunk against the window again, as she shut the door just as Charlie was putting his and Nick’s bags in the boot. He met Sarah’s concerned gaze.  “I think he needs to see a doctor.” Charlie said hesitantly. To his relief Sarah nodded right away.  “My thoughts exactly, darling.” She replied. “We’re heading straight to urgent care.” She announced. Glancing at Nick through the window. His eyes were closed.  She needed to get him checked over. Basic home flu remedies weren’t going to cut it this time.

Charlie sat in the back with Nick, rubbing his arm soothingly as he shivered and coughed beside him. He had his eyes closed, he looked exhausted. Charlie felt a pang of guilt, he wished he’d insisted that Nick stay home and they postpone the trip. Nick was so selfless, he never put himself first. Nicks eyes opened blearily as the car came to a stop. “Where are we?” He looked out the window and realised they weren’t in their driveway. Sarah turned to look at him, “we are at the walk in clinic at the hospital,” she saw Nicks face and ploughed on, “I want them to take a look at you before we go home.”
“Mum, please no….” Nick felt tears spring to his eyes, he just wanted to go home and go to bed. “I’ll be fine at home.”
Charlie squeezed his hand, “come on babe, let them have a look at you. You seem so much worse than this morning.” He pleaded with Nick, who knew he could never refuse anything Charlie asked. He gave a small nod and rubbed his eyes. Charlie unclipped his seatbelt and helped him out of the car.
The clinic was packed. They found three seats and Nick collapsed onto one of them while his mum spoke to the receptionist. She came back with an apologetic look on her face. “Sorry baby, it’s really busy in here so could be a wait.” Nick groaned. This is what he was afraid of, he just wanted to sleep. His vision was spinning, his head banging, his stomach still churning. “I don’t feel well,” he whimpered. Sarah hugged him tightly, wincing at the radiating heat. “I know sweetheart,” she soothed, “just rest. Do you feel like you are going to be sick again?” She noticed the green tinge to his face. Nick nodded and clapped his hand over his mouth. Charlie took his hand and led him to the bathroom, just in time for him to throw up in the toilet. His ears were ringing, he felt so so awful. After a moment, when Charlie was sure he was done, he helped him up to his feet. Nick felt the ground shift beneath him as he tried to stagger back to his seat….then the world went black.

Charlie watched as the light left Nicks eyes and he pitched forward. He tried to catch him, and was able to lower him down to the floor so he didn’t hurt himself. “Sarah!” He shouted across the waiting room. All eyes turned to look at him, Sarah quickly rushing up from her seat. “I think he’s passed out,” Charlie looked at her fearfully. Sarah knelt beside Nick and gently shook him. He let out a small groan. “Just stay still sweetheart, help is coming. She looked up, the commotion had obviously alerted the receptionist who was approaching with a doctor in tow. “Hello, I’m Dr South, can you tell me what happened?” Sarah told him about how poorly Nicky had become in London and that she’d brought him here because she was worried about him. “He needed to throw up again and he passed out on the way back.” She finished.
The doctor crouched down to Nick, who still had his eyes closed. “Nick, can you hear me?”
Nick groaned. He didn’t want to move. He didn’t want to open his eyes, he just wanted to stay on the cold hard floor where the world wasn’t spinning so hard. The doctor spoke again, “we need to get you into a consulting room, can you stand?” Nick tried to sit up, and was met with a wave of dizziness. Between the doctor and Charlie, they half dragged him through the waiting room and into a quiet consulting room. Nick laid down on the bed on his side, curled up in a ball. Charlie held tight to his hand. He couldn’t believe how poorly Nick had become. Thank god they left London when they did.
The doctor took time to examine Nick, “he’s extremely dehydrated,” he observed. “ he has a nasty chest infection to go with what appears to be the flu. I’d like him to go upstairs to get some IV fluids, we can also administer some anti sickness medicine to allow him to rest. He won’t need to stay overnight, just a couple of hours. The doctor made a couple of phone calls while Nick lay feeling completely miserable. He’d ruined everyone’s day out and now he was in a right mess.
A porter appeared with a wheelchair and helped Nick into it. “Right, let’s get you all fixed up shall we,” he said cheerfully. Charlie looked at Sarah, “shall I come with you?” Sarah nodded at him, his parents thought he was sleeping at theirs tonight so there was no rush to get him home. They made their way to a small ward and Nick was helped up on the bed. He was almost asleep he was so tired. A nurse came along and put a cannula in his hand, injecting him with anti nausea medicine. “There you are love, that’ll help you feel better.” She then attached a bag of fluid and left him in peace. Nick felt the effects of the medicine and allowed himself to drift off to sleep.
Charlie held his hand as he slept. “Poor Nick,” he looked at Sarah, “I wish he’d told me how poorly he was feeling. I feel so bad.” Sarah smiled softly at him. “Don’t beat yourself up sweetheart, I feel the same, I wish I’d been more insistent this morning when I could sense something was wrong. Nicks a stubborn thing,” she gently brushed the hair from Nicks face as he slept.
They stayed on the ward for a couple of hours as Nick received his much needed fluids. Sarah took the time to nip to the hospital pharmacy to pick up his prescriptions and then to the cafe for a drink for herself and Charlie. Nick slept through it all, his body was exhausted.

Sarah picked up the medicines prescribed by the doctors. A course of antibiotics for the chest infection and a decongestant. She also picked up some essentials in the pharmacy. Some throat lozenges, cherry, Nicks favourite. Some more paracetamol and ibuprofen to reduce his raging fever and a lot of tissues.  She returned to the room with a cup of tea for both herself and Charlie as Nick slept comfortably, curled up on his side, covered by a thin hospital blanket. The IV drip in his hand doing the job of flushing much needed liquids through his body. She knew that Nick was really unwell when he barely even flinched when the nurse injected his hand with a needle. Normally, Nick would have put up such a fuss.   Sarah watched her poorly son sleep, his chest rising and falling, the only sound in the room was the raspy sound of him breathing as he was full of congestion and the occasional harsh cough that would escape his lungs every now and then.

The nurse entered the room, carrying another bag of fluid, which she hooked up to Nick’s drip. She looked at Sarah with a kind smile.  “One more and then the doctor will probably want to check in again before discharging him.”  Sarah returned the smile as she glanced back down at her son.  “I feel a little silly, actually.” She sighed. “For rushing him here, in panic mode.” She said as she ran her fingers through a sleeping Nick’s hair. The nurse gave her another warm smile.  “You were just being a mother…it’s completely normal.” She said as she hooked the bag up and adjusted the blanket.  “Nasty chest infections like this one can go downhill pretty quickly.” She explained. “You did completely right thing bringing Nicholas here, left untreated he could have developed pneumonia.”  She said as she gently rested the back of her hand on Nick’s forehead, frowning at the heat she felt.  “It’s this fever I’m worried about.” She told Sarah.  “I’ve injected something in to Nicholas’ IV to help try and bring his temperature down.”  Sarah nodded and thanked the nurse as she left the room. She sighed. She wished she had been firmer this morning and made Nicky stay at home.

Charlie took the opportunity whilst Nick was asleep to update their friends who had all been messaging since they left London. Worried about Nick.

Charlie: Hey guys. Just thought I’d let you know that Nick’s at the hospital.  Don’t worry. He’s not being kept in but Sarah took one look at him when she picked up up and insisted we go straight to the walk in clinic.  Nicks got a really bad flu. He’s been throwing up non stop. He’s also got a chest infection so they’ve got him on IV fluids as he was dehydrated when we got here.  I hope you guys managed to enjoy the rest of the afternoon x

Elle: oh my god! That sounds awful 😢 poor Nick! Hope he feels better soon.

Tara: Oh no! Poor Nick ☹️ he really didn’t look well at all earlier. Chest infections are horrible😭

Issac: that’s horrid😭 hope you feel better soon Nick❤️

Tao: ouch!! That doesn’t sound fun 😩feel better soon Nelson!

Imogen: feel better Nicholas❤️ hope you’re getting lots of cuddles from Charlie 🫶🏼

Charlie: he will get all the cuddles his poorly body requires 👀

Darcy: that is repulsively CUTE!!!

Darcy: Feel better Nick!❤️ the flu sucks and the chest infection just sounds rank.

Sahar: Hope you feel better soon Nick❤️

Nick woke up after 3 hours of receiving IV fluids. He still felt exhausted and so unwell, but definitely felt a tiny bit perkier than before. He didn’t feel like he was going to pass out anymore.  He still felt shivery, everything ached. His chest was sore and felt heavy. His throat raw from all the coughing/vomiting. He blinked his eyes open. He knew instantly that he wasn’t at home in his own bed. The mattress was hard and lumpy and he was covered with the thinnest blanket ever. He realised with the strong sterile smell that hit his nostrils that he was at the hospital. That’s right. It all came back to him. He remembered the train journey home from London. Meeting his mum at the station and her whisking his poorly backside to the walk in clinic at Kent General Hospital. He had been resting his head on his mum’s shoulder, the waiting room was overpacked and noisy. He had squeezed his eyes shut praying for them to call his name when he felt the sickness climbing up his throat again and had to rush to the hospital and then….darkness. Nick’s eyes widened. That’s right!!! He had passed out, in the waiting room…in front of everyone. How embarrassing!

“Hello sleepy.”  The warm voice of his mum sounded. Nick rolled himself out of his curled up ball, so that he was lay flat on his back. He glanced up at his mum. She reached over and put her hand against his forehead, tutting and wincing at what she felt.  “How are you feeling, baby?” She asked as she stroked his hair.   “Horrible…” Nick mumbled. There was no point lying and denying it anymore. He felt like death warmed up. He couldn’t remember the last time he ever felt this poorly.  He just wanted to go home. “I don’t need to stay here, do i?” He asked with wide eyes. He thought he might actually burst out crying if they were to tell him he had to stay in hospital overnight. He just wanted his own bed. He wanted Nellie and Charlie cuddles. He wanted his mum to make him the special lemon tea she always made him when he felt poorly. Sarah smiled softly as she kissed his burning forehead.  “I don’t think so, baby.” He swept his fringe back. “Just waiting on the doctor popping back round.” She bit her lip nervously just hoping the doctor didn’t decide to keep Nick in because of the high fever.  She knew he just needed to get him started on his antibiotics and get some paracetamol in to him.    “Where’s Charlie?” Nick asked softly, a little pout appearing him on his lips. He couldn’t see his boyfriend and it caused him to feel distressed.  “Right here, babe.” Charlie announced as he stood up, coming in to view. He gripped Nick’s left hand, being careful not to knock the cannula.   “I thought you left me.” Nick mumbled, his eyes glassy and teary, it almost broke Charlie’s heart in two.  “Would I ever?” Charlie replied as he kissed Nick’s hand giving it a gentle squeeze. He hated seeing Nick like this.

The doctor came along to check on Nick. “His temperature is higher than I’d like but I think we just need to give it time. Keep him cool, take his antibiotics regularly, alongside his paracetamol and ibuprofen. I’ll order him another anti sickness dose and then you can be on your way. Hope you feel better soon lad.” The doctor shook Sarah’s hand and smiled at Nick and Charlie as he left. Nick sighed with relief, he could go home. To his cosy bed and a dark room. Half an hour later and they were making their way to the car. Charlie gripped tightly onto Nick, terrified he was going to keel over again at any moment. Nick felt like his legs were jelly. The walk to the car was slow and steady and he was relieved when he finally made it to the car and slumped onto the back seat. He fell asleep the instant his car door was closed and had to be woken up by his mum once they had pulled into the driveway. “im so tired,” he moaned as she took his hand and helped him out of the car. “I know baby, the doctor said the medicine would make you drowsy. Let’s get you upstairs and into bed hmm?” Charlie took his arm and led him upstairs while Sarah shooed the dogs into the kitchen and out of the way. The last thing she wanted was for them to trip Nick up.
Once in his room he sat on the edge of his bed and put his head in his hands. He felt so awful. Charlie kneeled in front of him and rubbed his arms. “Let me help you,” he said softly. Nick nodded. He hated being a burden but he just didn’t have the energy to argue. Charlie unlaced Nick’s vans and took them off. He went to Nicks cupboard and found him some soft pyjama bottoms and a white t shirt. Nick changed into them and then Charlie helped him to the bathroom. It felt good to brush his teeth and splash water on his face. Then he shuffled back to his room and straight under the covers. Charlie tucked him in gently. “Sleep babe, you’ll feel better in the morning.” He brushed his sweaty hair off his head. “Are you staying with me? “ nick looked at him with his puppy eyes and Charlie melted. “Yeah course I am. Just sleep, I’ll be here when you wake up.”
Nick dozed while Charlie scrolled on his phone. Sarah appeared with medicine for Nick, a water bottle and a tea for Charlie who took it gratefully. “Are you hungry sweetheart,” she whispered to Charlie, not wanting to wake her poorly son. Charlie thought back. It had been ages since he ate anything and he knew he needed to stick to his schedule as much as possible. “Would you like some cheese on toast?” He smiled at her and nodded. “I’ll bring it right up.”
Charlie wolfed the food down, he was more hungry than he had realised. Nick was out for the count, star fished in his bed. His breathing was awful and he was covered in a sheen of sweat, but he seemed peaceful at last. Charlie sent a text to update their friends and then risked squeezing himself into bed next to Nick. Nick instantly moved over to make room for him and then threw his arm over Charlie, “god babe, you are far too hot to be cuddling me.” Nick grinned, “you think I’m hot?” Charlie laughed, “you know what I mean! You feeling a bit better?” Nick moved his arm away and shrugged. “Not really, but I don’t feel sick anymore. So that’s good. I’m sorry I ruined the day, I should have just told you this morning.” He sighed, “yeah you should but I’m glad you owned up eventually.” He kissed Nicks forehead. “I love you, now go to sleep!”
Nick settled down against his pillow and closed his eyes. It would be a few more days until he was on the mend but he felt loved and cared for every step of the way. If Charlie was at home, then Sarah was there. Nellie set up residence at the bottom of his bed and kept him company while he coughed, shivered and sneezed while he watched marvel movies. His friends sent him lots of get well messages. He finally felt better by the following Monday, over a week later. his cough was still chesty but his temperature was normal and he was back to his usual self. He managed to convince his mum to let him go to school. He was just finishing his tie when the doorbell went. He raced downstairs and opened it to reveal Charlie, grinning at him. “Hi!” Nick looked at him in surprise, “what are you doing here?” He kissed him gently. “Im here to walk you to school,” Charlie smiled at him. Nick beamed back, grabbed his bag, yelled a goodbye to his mum and took Charlie’s hand as they made their way to school.

Chapter Text

“Will you walk Nellie before it gets too late darling?” Sarah asked asked her son as she swiped her keys off of the mantelpiece in the living room. Nick glanced up from the TV and nodded to show that he acknowledged her. Sarah was on her way to her works Christmas do. Yes, it was early. With it only being the first weekend in December, but they’d cleverly booked their reservations in time before everywhere started selling out. “It’s quite icey outside Nicky, please be careful you don’t slip.” She told him as she re-applied her lipstick in the living room mirror before stuffing it into her hand-bag and bending down to kiss Nick on the forehead, resulting in him groaning that she’d probably smudged red lipstick all over him. She rolled her eyes with a light laugh as she ruffled his hair. He batted her away, also rolling his eyes but flashing her a soft smile. Sarah knew he was moping. It was very unusual for Nick to be at home, alone on a Saturday evening, but Charlie had family plans and his other friends were tied up with something or another. “We’ll be fine, won’t we girl..” Nick replied as he bent down to ruffle Nellie’s fur as she was curled up at his feet on the carpet. “Just watch out for the black ice.” Sarah instructed as she adjusted a sting of lights on the Christmas tree. Nicky always insisted on having the house decorated as soon as the first of December rolled around. “The last thing you want is to have to spend the holidays in a plaster cast.” Nick just rolled his eyes. He loved his mum dearly, but sometimes she could be just that teeny tiny tad bit overbearing. “I’ll probably not be back until late, baby.” Sarah smiled. “I’ll see you in the morning.” Nick smiled. “See you tomorrow, mum. Have a great time..” he grinned, standing up and giving her a hug. “You look very pretty, by the way.” He added as he pulled away. Sarah smiled, her heart warming. She really did have the best son in the universe. “Thank you darling.” She smiled as she heard a horn tooting from outside. “That’s the cab…bye sweetheart.”

Nick watched her leave and resumed his marvel movie that was playing. He pouted a little. He and Charlie had made plans to spend the evening watching Christmas movies as he knew Sarah would be out all evening but Charlie’s parents had other ideas and he had been dragged off to spend the weekend with his grandparents in Surrey. Nick glanced at Nellie who was looking at him with her big, chocolate, brown eyes. “Okay, girl I hear you.” He chuckled as he stood up and headed in to the kitchen. He dished up her dinner, re-filled the water bowl and then proceeded to raid the fridge for himself. God bless Sarah. Always ensuring the fridge was fully stocked with Nick’s favourites. He unboxed a ham and pineapple oven pizza and put the oven to preheat. He watched as Nellie hungrily ate from her dish. It was 6:30pm. He’d have his pizza and then take Nellie out for her evening walk before it got much later and that way he could spend the rest of the evening watching movies and feeling sorry for himself that he was alone on a Saturday night.

Nick grabbed himself a can of Fanta and a packet of salt and vinegar crisps as his pizza cooked away, flopping back down on the couch. Nellie hopped up beside him and started licking his face. Nick couldn’t help but chuckle as she slobbered all over his face. He knew what she was after. “We’ll go out soon girl, I promise…” he grinned as he ruffled her ears. Nellie cocked her little head and looked at him. Nick smiled. He knew she was looking for Charlie. She was so used to having him around. “I know, I miss him too.” He chuckled warm heartedly. Nick played with Nellie for a while until he heard the timer on the oven go off. He dished up his pizza and sat back down in the lounge, polishing it off, apart from a few crusts in which he fed to Nellie.

Nick washed up his plate before grabbing his coat from the downstairs cupboard. Nellie bounded up behind him. Her tail wagging excitedly. She knew what this meant. Walkies. Nick smiled fondly at his fluffy best friend as he grabbed her leash from the hook under the stairs. “Shall we go for a walk, girl?” He grinned. Nellie borked excitedly. Nick smiled as he clipped the leash on to her collar, shoving his phone into his back pocket and swiping his house keys out of the dish. He couldn’t help but chuckle at Nellie’s over excited bounce as he locked up the front door. She was such a good girl. Nick glanced at the Christmas lights and wreath that decorated his door and doorway. He and his mum always went overboard with the Christmas decorations. For as long as he remembered. Christmas was Nick’s favourite season. He loved when it turned cold and frosty outside. When the dark nights settled in. He loved the smell of Christmas everywhere he went, the bright lights, the smell of cinnamon and sugar cookies. The movies, the music. All the festivities.

Nick walked down the driveway, hearing the frost that was painted on the pavement, crunch beneath his feet. It wasn’t snowing, although it was definitely cold enough. He felt Jack Frost nipping at his cheeks as soon as he stepped outside. It was freezing but fresh. Sarah hadn’t been kidding. It was very icey. Nick grabbed his phone out of his pocket as he and Nellie strolled down his street. He read through his notifications as his friends filled him in on their evenings.

Charlie: I would much rather be cuddled up with you watching Elf😩🎄 my grandparents tried to make a roast for dinner and failed miserably. Hope you’re not missing me too much 🫶🏼

Tara: Darcy and I have just watched that new Zac efron film at the cinema!!! You guys need to see it!!!😍

Elle: Tara? Are you fangirling over Zac Efron???😮😂

Darcy: RUDE! I am right here 💁🏼‍♀️

Imogen: 😅😅😅. For the record I am definitely up for salivating over Zac Efron with you girls 😍

Tara: you know no one will ever capture my heart the way you do Darcy❤️

Tao: you guys are disgustingly cute…it makes me want to vomit

Elle: TAO!!!!

Tao: you know I’m kidding! But I am not going to the cinema to get all googly eyed over Troy Bolton…

Elle: 😅😅😅😅

Charlie: but WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER!!!!

Tara: 😅😅😅😅😅

Darcy:😅😅😅😅 Charlie!!! My milkshake nearly came out my nose

Elle: grossssss😅 but that was a good one Charlie!

Tao: I don’t think Nick will approve of your Zac Efron fetish🥴

Charlie: I do not have a Zac Efron fetish 🤣

Darcy: No….you have a Nicholas Nelson fetish..

Nick: 😍😍😍😍

Darcy: NICK!!! my man 🙌🏼

Nick: am I being replaced by Zac Efron? 😭

Charlie: I would never replace you baby😘

Nick: Good! I’m glad to hear that ❤️❤️

Sahar: this group chat never fails to make me feel depressingly single 😅

Issac: I always come in at the wrong times 😅

Nick chuckled as he read the messages in the chat. He loved his friends dearly but their conversation subjects were questionable. Nick felt Nellie tugging on the lead. He obviously wasn’t walking fast enough for her as they approached the park. Nick let her off the lead so she could run around and run off some steam. Nick sat on the park bench and continued to read his messages as Nellie did her business. He smiled as she bounded back over to him, an indication that she was ready to go home. “Let’s go home, girl..” he announced as he bent down and re-clipped her leash.

Nick let Nellie lead him towards the footpath. She was clever dog. She knew the way home. Nick always took the same route with her. Nick shivered under his coat. He couldn’t believe how cold it was, well he could. It was December after all, but it was absolutely freezing. He really should let him mum buy him that warm winter coat she kept nagging him to get. He couldn’t wait to get home and change into Pyjamas and his fleecy dressing gown, curl up on the sofa watching Christmas movies with a hot chocolate. He snorted and mentally laughed at how pathetic his Saturday night sounded. He was suddenly tugged forward as Nellie began running, like she was chasing something. “Nellie!!!” He exclaimed. “Slow down, girl!!” He called as he struggled to get a solid grip on her. He suddenly seen what she was running after, a squirrel. He groaned. There was no way he was going to be able to restrain her. She was a playful pup. She wanted to play chase with the squirrel. Nick knew he couldn’t let go as he was always scared that he would lose Nellie. “Nellie! STOP!” He yelled a little bit louder as he felt himself being completely pulled forward, his speed quickening as he ran behind his dog. Surely she would get fed up soon and tire out. No chance! Nick knew that Nellie was a never ending ball of energy. He tried to pull back on the leash, trying to halt her, but she was far too strong for him. Suddenly Nick felt himself skid. He glanced around. The footpath was covered in black ice. “Nellie! Stop, girl…”
He tried again. This wasn’t good. The path was literally like an ice rink. This wasn’t going to end well…it it didn’t. Nick didn’t have anytime to react as he felt himself slip backwards, the leash falling out is his hands as he literally flew in the air before crashing down hard on his back, smashing his head on to the hard concrete ground as he did. His leg bent at an awkward angle. He was aware of himself falling and then everything went dark.

Nick groaned as he came to. His head hurt, his leg hurt. He was also freezing cold, the icy ground beneath him seeping into his clothes. How long had he been unconscious for? He wasn’t sure but judging by how cold he was, it was a while. He could feel something wet on his face and it took him a moment to realise it was Nellie, frantically licking his face trying to wake him up. She was whining and her paws were nudging his chest. “It’s ok Nell,” Nick managed to groan out. He opened his eyes, wincing. Shit. His mum was going to kill him. He should have been more careful. He gently felt the back of his head, hissing at the pain. His hand came away covered with blood . Double shit. He tried to sit up slowly, his vision blurring with the movement. He definitely had a concussion. He’d had one before after a bad rugby tackle so he knew the signs. He glanced around him, the path was completely deserted. He gingerly applied the tiniest amount of pressure to his leg to see if he could put any weight on it but his ankle screamed in pain. Great.
His mind was fuzzy, he knew he needed help. Nellie was whimpering next to him. If only he could send her off to get help like they did in the movies! He fished his phone out of his back pocket. The screen had a large crack which was splintering all across his screen but he breathed a sigh of relief when the Lock Screen lit up. He scrolled to his mums number, then hesitated. She never went out and she’d been looking forward to her Christmas party for ages. He didn’t want to call her and force her to come home early to collect him. It was his own stupid fault he was in this mess. She’d warned him so many times that it was icy. He really should have been more careful, worn something other than his vans which really didn’t have any grip.
Nick shivered as the cold reached his bones. He was in danger of hyperthermia if he didn’t get off this icy path soon. He was so tired. He knew that was due to the head injury. He phoned Charlie, he would know what to do.
“Nick! How’s your evening?” Charlie’s cheery voice came down the line. “I’m in the middle of a board game with my cousins. I’m winning of course. What are you doing?”
Charlie waited for a response. “Nick? You there? You didn’t butt dial me did you?” Nick tried to focus on Charlie’s voice. His vision was swimming. “Ch…Ch…..Char?” He managed to stutter out.
“Nick?” Charlie felt his senses heighten. Nick sounded weird. He excused himself from the game and went to the conservatory where he could talk to Nick alone. “What’s wrong babe are you ok?”
“I….I fell,” Nicks teeth were chattering. “Walking Nellie.”
“Oh no, you idiot! What happened?” Charlie’s smiled softly at the thought of his giant boyfriend slipping over. He waited for Nicks response, growing slightly uneasy at the lack of one coming over the phone.
“Babe, are you ok? Where are you?”
“I’m so cold,” Nick whispered, “I hit my head. There’s blood….” Charlie felt like a bucket of icy water had been tipped over him. “What?” He shrieked. “Nick where are you?”
Nick closed his eyes to try to dull the pain in his head. He just wanted to go to sleep. “Nick!” He heard Charlie shouting through the phone. “Keep talking to me, where are you?”
He forced his eyes back open. “I was walking Nellie…I fell…..” Charlie groaned in frustration. He knew that bit already. He needed to get help to Nick. “Can you see anyone to help you?” Nick turned his head both ways. The path was still empty. “No…” he said, “I’m so tired Char.” Charlie ran his fingers through his hair, “no babe you must stay awake ok? I’m going to get you some help.”
He raced through to the lounge where Tori was sitting on the sofa, can of lemonade in hand. “Tori, come quick, bring your phone.” Tori looked up sharply, seeing the panic on her little brother’s face. She followed him quickly. “What’s wrong?” She asked.
“It’s Nick,” Charlie indicated the phone in his hand, “he’s fallen walking Nellie. He’s hit his head. He sounds so confused. I don’t know what to do.”
Toris eyes widened in shock. “Have you phoned his mum?” Charlie’s shook his head. “She’s out at a Christmas party. She’s not home to go and find him. He needs help Tor, and I’m not there!” He suddenly remembered Nick on the phone. “You still awake babe?” He listened for Nicks response. He could hear his breathing. But he didn’t respond. “Nick!” He shouted.
Nick was feeling so floaty. He didn’t even feel cold anymore. He just wanted to sleep. He was jolted back by the sound of Charlie shouting at him. Charlie was here? He was so confused. No, he was on the phone. “Char,” he whispered. “I need you.” Charlie felt tears spring to his eyes. He looked pleadingly at Tori. “Which of your friends lives nearest Nicks? He can’t be far from home?” Charlie thought desperately. “Tao is only ten minutes away.” Tori nodded, “give me his number I’ll call him. We should also call the police. And his mum. This is serious Charlie, it’s minus 5 out there this evening. He needs to be found NOW.” Charlie felt the tears run down his cheeks as he quickly read out the number to Tori. “Nick? Can you switch to a video call? It might help us find you?”
Nick tried to focus on the phone screen but his vision was swimming. “I can’t see….the button…I’m sorry Char,” he stuttered out. “It’s ok babe, just stay awake for me. Help is coming.
Charlie could hear Tori talking to Tao, “Charlie, where does he normally walk Nellie?” She asked him. “Oh, um, there’s that park off Middle street, he usually does a loop there.” Tori relayed the information to Tao. “Tao’s on his way now with Elle. I’m phoning the police.” She dialled 999. Charlie focused his attention on Nick.
“Baby, keep talking to me,” he begged. Nick had to stay awake he knew how dangerous it was to fall asleep with a head injury.
“Hmm,” Nick replied, “I’m so tired Charlie….” Charlie felt dread rush through him. “I know you are baby, but you need to stay awake until help comes, ok? Keep talking to me….”
“K….” Nick laid his head back down on the ground, wincing at the pain throbbing at the back of it. He looked up at the sky, it was dark, the only light coming from a nearby lamp post. He watched his breath swirl above him. “ I love you Char,” his eyes fluttered shut, he was so sleepy. “Nick?” Charlie shouted into the phone, “Babe?” Nothing.
“Shit,” Charlie looked at Tori desperately. She had just finished on the phone to the police. “They are sending a car out to look for him, Tao and Elle are almost at the park. They will find him Charlie. He’ll be ok.”
“You don’t know that!” Charlie cried. “He’s not answering me anymore.” Toris face fell. “It’ll be ok. We should phone Sarah…..” she looked at Charlie for confirmation. He nodded. “I need to stay on the line with Nick.” She sighed, then went to find Jane, this problem was too big for the two of them to handle.
Charlie listened carefully on the phone. He could hear people approaching, “Oh Jesus, Nick? Can you hear me mate?” Tao! Charlie shouted into the phone, “Tao, is he ok?”
Tao crouched down next to Nick. He was ice cold and obviously not conscious any longer. He took his coat off and carefully draped it over Nick. Elle did the same. She gently touched his cheek, he was frozen. This wasn’t good. She shook his shoulders carefully. No response. Nellie was sitting at Nick’s feet whimpering, she knew her boy was in trouble. Tao could see he still had his phone in his hand and he pulled it out of his grasp.
“Charlie? I’m here, we found him!” He yelled into the phone. “ he needs an ambulance.” He was interrupted by the sound of footsteps. Two police officers came jogging up to them, “is this the missing lad?” They looked at Tao. He nodded, “nick Nelson. Yeah.” His voice was shaky, Nick looked so pale and still, he couldn’t be comfortable on the cold wet hard ground. The police officers took over, radioing for help. Tao saw Nellies lead and picked it up, Nick would be devastated if she ran off in all the commotion.

Tao rushed home. Nellie in tow. Elle had gone in the ambulance with Nick so that he wasn’t on his own. He had sent Charlie a message, explaining that he had Nellie with him and he would keep her at his place for as long as needed. She’d be well looked after. Yan kept a supply of doggy treats in the cupboard for the neighbours dogs and more recently when Nick would bring Nellie round to visit.

Tori rushed towards the kitchen where Jane was helping her mother in law dish up the deserts. “Mum!!” She announced as she came crashing in to the room. Jane glanced at her daughter, noticing her worried expression and her heavy breathing. “Victoria?” She asked. Had something happened? Where was Charlie? What was going on? “You need to call Sarah…” Tori rambled. Jane frowned. Why did she need to phone Nick’s mother? “What? Why?” She asked. She could tell by the expression on her daughter’s face that something bad had happed. “It’s Nick…” Tori told her. “He’s had an accident.” Jane’s eyes widened in shock. That didn’t sound good at all. “What kind of accident?” She asked, her voice was laced with concern. “He slipped on ice whilst walking Nellie in the park.” Tori began to explain. “He…he banged his head, hard….he lost consciousness for a bit.” Jane gasped. Her eyes widening even more. Nick hit his head? That was serious. “He managed to call Charlie and direct him to where he is. Charlie called the police and Tao and Elle who’ve found him…” Jane couldn’t believe all this had been going on and she was only finding out how. “I think he was out cold for a while. He was chittering really badly on the phone. We called an ambulance…he’s on his way to the hospital now.” Jane was struggling to process all the information. “Where’s Nellie?” She asked. She would need to know all the facts for them she phoned Sarah. She had already reached for her mobile and was looking up her sons boyfriends mothers number as she spoke. “Tao has taken her home with him and Elle is riding in the ambulance so that Nick’s not alone. Sarah is at a Christmas party on the other side of down.” “I’ll call her now…” Jane stared as she brought up Sarah’s number and hit dial.

Sarah placed the paper crown on her head from the Christmas cracker as she laughed and joked with her work colleagues over a glass of wine and some appetisers as they waited for their main course to be served. She almost didn’t hear her mobile ring over the noise of the busy restaurant. She glanced at her screen. Jane spring is calling. She frowned. Why would Jane be calling her? Nick and Charlie weren’t together this evening. She felt an unsettling feeling in her stomach. Has Charlie relapsed? She didn’t even consider the fact that Nick could be the one in question. As far as she was concerned her son was at home watching the TV. “Hello? Jane?” She said. “Sarah? Hello! Can you hear me?” Sarah could barely hear Sarah over the excited chit chat surrounding her. “Just a minute.” She told Jane on the phone as she excused herself from the table and headed outside where it was considerably quieter. “Jane? Is everything okay…” Jane took a deep breath. There was no easy way to tell Sarah this without worrying her. “It’s Nick…”. Sarah felt her heart stop momentarily. She felt her legs turn to jelly. “What about Nick?” She asked softly. Dreading the answer. It didn’t sound good. “He’s had an accident…” Jane replied slowly. “He’s taken a tumble whilst walking Nellie.” Sarah’s eyes widened. She had only just warned Nicky about being careful on the ice. “I told him to be careful.” She sighed. She hesitated for a minute. “Is…is he’s okay?” Jane paused for a moment. The suspense was killing Sarah. This wasn’t a good sign. “I don’t know all the details…” Jane started. “He’s hit his head.” Sarah felt sick, a head injury didn’t sound good. “He…he blacked out…I…I don’t know how long for.” Jane explained. “He managed to call Charlie but as far as I know he passed out again. He’s on his way to Kent General.” Jane informed her. “Elle is with him and Tao has taken Nellie back to his house.” Sarah felt tears in her eyes. Her baby was on his way to the hospital?? How serious was it? How long had he been lay in the park, cold and unconscious for?? It was minus 5 outside!! Far too cold. “I…I’m going to leave now. I…i don’t have the car and I have had a drink so I’ll need to get a cab? What about Charlie?” Sarah asked as she frantically rushed back into the reception of the restaurant and asking a member of staff to call her a Taxi. “We’re at Julio’s sisters house in Surrey. His parents are visiting from Spain.”
Jane explained. “If I know my son, though. He’s going to want to get there as soon as possible. So I imagine we will be driving back to Kent shortly. Will you keep me updated?” “Of course!” Sarah replied. “Thank you for calling.”

Sarah ended the call and made her way back over to the table. She grabbed her coat from the back of her chair and slipped in on. Cassandra, her work colleague shot her a questioning look. “Is everything Ok Sarah?” She asked, noticing the tear stains on her friends cheeks. Sarah shook her head. “It’s Nick, he’s had a bad fall.” She said urgently as she picked up her hand bag. “Oh gosh, is he alright?” Stephen, her other colleague asked. Sarah sighed. “I don’t know. He slipped on the ice and hit his head.” She winced. She couldn’t bear the thought. “He’s on his way to the hospital…im so sorry. I have to go..” “You don’t need to apologise. He’s your son.” Cassandra gave her a comforting cuddle. “Keep us updated, yeah?”

Meanwhile Elle sat in the back of the ambulance watching as the paramedics treated Nick. They had him covered in a foil blanket, to try and trap the natural heat of his body. She heard them mention that Nick was ‘Hypothermic’ she was no medical expert, but she knew that sounded serious. They had inserted an IV Cannula in to the back of his hand, placed an oxygen mask over his nose and mouth and were shining a light in to his eyes, calling his name and trying to get a response as her friend floated in and out of consciousness. Elle had gotten a glimpse of her friends face. He didn’t look good. Nick was deathly pale with a blue tint to his lips and eyelids. His breathing was very shallow and his body was violently shivering, despite his semi conscious state. She was snapped out of her though as a painful groan escaped Nick’s lips. He tried to free his arm that was trapped under the foil blanket. “Ssssh it’s okay Nick.” The female paramedic soothed the evidently distressed teenager. “Nick? I’m here.” Elle spoke up, hoping that hearing a familiar voice would be comforting would help keep Nick calm and relaxed. “It’s Elle. You’re okay.” Elle spoke softly. “You’re in the ambulance. You had a bad fall…do you remember?” She said as she hesitated for a moment before reaching out to stroke Nick’s hair. In normal circumstances she would opt to hold his hand for comfort, but he was wrapped up in foil blankets. Nick mumbled something but it was muffled and inaudible under the oxygen mask. “He’s trying to say something.” Elle glanced at the paramedic, who carefully removed the oxygen mask. “Nel…” Nick rasped, it was clearly difficult for him to speak right now. “Nellie..” he repeated, his voice chattering as the cold rushed through his body. The paramedics gave Elle a questioning look. “Nellies his dog.” Elle explained as she focused her attention on Nick again. “It’s okay Nick.” She soothed. “Nellie is with Tao. He is taking good care of her, I promise.” She assured him. “You just rest.” Nick nodded softly as his eyes began to flutter closed again. He was so so tired. “Nick? My names Katie. We’re almost at the hospital.” The paramedic told him. “I’m just going to place this mask back over your nose and mouth to help you breathe, okay?” She explained as she placed the mask back on his face. Nick let out a soft moan as sleep claimed his body once more.

“This is Nicholas.” Katie, the paramedic informed the medical staff that greeted them at the emergency enterance at the historical. “He’s 17 years old. Suffered a serious bump to the head after slipping on some ice.” She said as Nick was rushed through the double doors that lead to resus. Elle kept close, not wanting to leave her friend alone. “He’s Hypothermic and bradycardic. Blood pressure and core body temperature are dangerously low. X-ray will be required on his right leg, suspected sprain…” Nick was wheeled over to an examination bay in the centre of the room. “We need to get him out of these wet clothes!” One of the doctors announced. Elle tried to keep up with the medical jargon. It all sounded so serious. She was stopped by a nurse. “Can’t I stay with him? He’s my friend. He’s scared…” Elle pleaded. The nurse gave her a kind smile. “He’s in good hands. I promise. Shall we get you a warm cup of tea?”

Nick drifted in and out of consciousness. He was aware of people surrounding him, light shining in his eyes, so much medical jargon he didn’t understand. He felt hands on him as they took scissors and cut off his clothes. He didn’t have the energy to feel embarrassed. He was so cold and tired. A hospital gown was put on him and then he felt thick warm blankets over top. He was frightened, he wanted his mum. He tried to speak but the mask got in the way. He let out a moan and one of the nurses came up close, “it’s ok Nicholas, you are at the hospital. You’ve had a nasty bang on the head and your body temperature is very low from being out in the cold so long. We just need to warm you up a bit ok?” Nicks nodded, tears in his eye. “Mum…” he whispered, “Where’s my mum?” The nurse smiled at him sympathetically. She had a teenager herself and as much as they like to think they are all grown up, when things go wrong they always want their mum. “I’m sure she’s on her way, I’ll find out for you.” Nick closed his eyes and sighed. He really needed his mum.
“Right,” one of the doctors said, “I want a CT scan to check his head for any internal injuries and an X-ray on his right leg. Call and let them know we are on our way please!” The porters took the brakes off the bed and Nick felt himself being wheeled away.

Sarah threw some money at the taxi driver and ran into accident and emergency, her heels click clacking on the floor. She rushed to the reception desk. “My son has been brought in, he had a fall?” She looked pleadingly at the receptionist. “Name?” The receptionist replied.
“Nicholas Nelson,” Sarah tapped her fingers impatiently on the desk as she waited, “ah yes, found him. I’ll get someone to come and update you. Take a seat please.” She picked up the phone and began talking to someone on the end. Sarah sighed and glanced around the room for somewhere to sit. She spotted Elle sitting in the corner nursing cup of tea. “Elle?” She walked up to her, “what happened, how is he?”
Elle looked up as Sarah approached. Thank god she was here. She jumped up and hugged her tightly. “Um, he woke up in the ambulance, I went with him so he wasn’t by himself. He was worried about Nellie….Tao has her, she’s fine.” Elles voice trembled as she spoke. “He was really cold, the doctor mentioned hypothermia?” Sarah paled. “I’m so glad you found him, I can’t thank you both enough. If you hadn’t…..” tears sprang to Sarah’s eyes. “Where is he now?”
“They wouldn’t let me stay with him, he was through there,” she pointed to the double doors at the end. “He was so pale, he looked blue.” A tear ran down her cheek. “Ive never seen anyone that colour….” Sarah sank into the chair next to Elle, holding her hand.
Eventually a doctor interrupted them. “Are you here for Nicholas Nelson?” Sarah stood up, “yes I’m his mum. How is he?” The doctor shook her hand, “come with me and I can update you and take you to him.” Sarah nodded, looking at Elle. “Will you be ok here?” Elle gave her a reassuring smile. “Yeah course, my mum is on her way to pick me up. Will you let us know how he is?” Sarah hugged her, promising to phone her mum as soon as she had news.
The doctor led Sarah through to resus. “He’s just back from CT and X-ray. Luckily his leg isn’t broken, just a bad ankle sprain. He has a nasty concussion, but no internal injuries. We will need to stitch up the cut on the back of his head. Our main concern at the moment is his body temperature is so low, he’s hypothermic. We have him on warming blankets to try and get his core temperature up.” Sarah tried to process the information, she couldn’t quite believe what had happened in the last couple of hours. “Can I see him?” The doctor smiled, “ of course, he’s been asking for you.” Sarah felt her heart break. The thought of him being here all alone was devastating.
The doctor led her to a small curtained off section of resus, pulling the curtain aside and Sarah got her first look at Nick. He looked so small in the bed. He had thick blankets covering him up to the neck, an oxygen mask covering his mouth and nose. There was a large bandage wrapped around his head, to control the bleeding until he had his stitches in. An IV line snaked under the blanket and into his arm, giving him much needed fluids. “Oh baby,” Sarah cooed as she walked up to the side of the bed. She couldn’t hold his hand because his arm was under the blanket so she gently stroked his cheek. His eyes fluttered open, “mum?” He croaked. His mum was here, Nick let the tears fall, he finally felt safe knowing his mum was by his side. “I’m sorry,” his voice was muffled by the mask but Sarah understood him. “You don’t need to be sorry baby, it was an accident. Im just glad you are ok,” she stroked his cheek and hair gently, “are you in pain darling?” Nick shook his head, “they gave me something for the pain, I’m just so cold and tired” he was still shivering under the warm blankets. “You just sleep sweetheart, I’ll be right here.” Nick closed his eyes and allowed himself to drift off.
The nurse came by to check his monitors. “Is he going to be ok?” Sarah asked him. The nurse jotted some readings down before answering, “he’s on the mend, his temperature has increased a bit but it’s not normal yet. I would imagine we will be finding space for him on the ward so we can continue to monitor him overnight. He has a bad concussion which we will want to keep an eye on too.” Sarah breathed a sigh of relief. He was on the mend, she clung on to those words. She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket and fished it out. It was from Jane to say they would be arriving at the hospital shortly. “Nicky darling, I’m just going to let Charlie know what’s happening.” Nicks didn’t respond, he was sleeping peacefully. She kissed his forehead and stepped outside to phone Jane. She didn’t want to go far, she stayed in view of his bed the whole time. If he woke up she was going to be there.

She clicked on Jane’s number, not taking her eyes off her son as she watched him sleep through the little glass window. It suddenly began to dawn on her how close she had been to losing him tonight. The doctors have more or less told her if Nick had been outside for much longer, his organs would have probably began to shut down. He wouldn’t have been able to survive the freezing temperatures outside. Someone was definitely watching over her little boy tonight. It was a good thing Nicky had regained consciousness and had been able to call Charlie or…she didn’t even want to finish that thought. The tears were already pooling at he eyes. She quickly snapped back in to reality as she heard Jane’s voice in the other end of the line. “Sarah? We’ve just pulled up outside the hospital. Where are you?” Jane asked. “I’m in Triage with Nick. We’re waiting for a bed to become available on a ward…” Sarah explained as she watched through the window as the nurse tended to her sleeping son. She watched as they replaced the oxygen mask that was covering his nose and mouth with some nasal prongs. That looked so much more comfier. They place heating pads in the crease of his neck and around his torso. Covering him back up with the blankets. Hypothermia. Her baby had hypothermia because he was laying outside in the cold for goodness how long. What if he hadn’t regained consciousness? What if he hadn’t been able to call Charlie? She choked back a sob. She couldn’t think like that. Nick was alive and was being treated. It broke her heart picturing him lying there out cold, though.

Sarah could hear Charlie in the background of the call, his voice desperately asking if Nick is okay? She could hear Jane trying to calm and reassure him as she assumed they were walking towards the hospital entrance. “We’re just in reception we will be with you very soon..” Jane assured Sarah as the call ended. Sarah slipped her mobile back into her bag with shaky hands as she re-entered the room. She didn’t like being away from Nick for any length of time. Not when he was still so poorly. The nurses were still desperately trying to heat him back up. She watched as one of them injected a glass syringe of clear liquid into Nick’s IV. “What’s that?” She asked curiously. “It’s a warm saline solution.” The nurse explained. “It will help warm him up inside as we take care of warming him outside.” Sarah watched as she covered another thick blanket around her son. She could see he was still shaking slightly despite being covered with at least 5 blankets. The other nurse replaced the medical gauze at the back of his head. Sarah felt sick as she caught glance of the what was once white material saturated in red blood. Nicky’s blood. “Once his core body temperature is at a safe level, we will be able to stitch up this wound.” She said as she applied firm pressure to help stop the bleed a little. Nick let out a little sleepy groan. His eyes remained closed.

Charlie took the lead as they made their way from reception to the triage area where the kind lady behind the reception desk had directed them. Charlie just had to see Nick. He would’ve be convinced otherwise until he saw his boyfriend for his own eyes. Charlie pushed through the double doors and practically bumped in to Elle and her mother who were going the opposite way. “Elle!!!” Charlie exclaimed as he flung his arms around his friend’s neck, engulfing her in a tight hug. Elle and Tao had been complete life savers this evening, rushing to Nick’s aid when he couldn’t be there. He didn’t want to even think about what could have happened had they not been there. “Thank you so much for finding him.” Charlie said in a small voice. Elle hugged him tightly in return. This evening had been a close call. She knew it was going to be a while before she stopped seeing the images of Nick lying there, unmoving. His skin pale and his lips blue. He nearly died. They could have lost their friend tonight all because he slipped on some ice.

Sarah snapped out of her trance by a little tapping on the window. She spun around. Jane, Julio, Tori…and Charlie. They all looked so worried. “I’ll be right back baby.” Sarah soothed as she kissed Nick’s forehead. He still seemed to be asleep but the creases on his forehead indicated that it was far from a comfortable slumber. He was breathing heavy, his chest was raspy. The nurse did say that it would be a miracle if Nick survived this without getting sick. He had been outside in freezing temperatures for god knows how long. His ‘winter’ coat, doing nothing to protect him. Nick would always roll his eyes and complain when she would suggest buying him a proper, puffer jacket for the winter months instead of the brown, barely thicker than a windbreaker coat that he insisted wearing. Sarah stepped out the room and was automatically enveloped in a hug from Jane. “We got here as quickly as we could..”. Julio explained, giving her a hug once Jane pulled away. “How’s he doing?” Sarah let out a heavy sigh, glancy at Charlie, who had hung back from the greetings. His eyes fixated on his boyfriend, through the glass window. Sarah reached out and put a comforting hand on his shoulder. Charlie barely reacted. He couldn’t take his eyes off Nick. His boyfriend looked so much smaller tucked up in the bed. His skin looking deathly pale. “He’s got hypothermia.” Sarah stated. “They’re trying to heat him up. He’s going to need stitches on a gash on the back of his head and he’s got a bad sprain to his leg….oh and a concussion.” She sighed. Jane let out a little gasp. “Hypothermia?” Sarah nodded. “The doctor says that he’s so lucky he was found when he was or…he..” she choked back a sob. She couldn’t say it out loud. Jane just enveloped her in another hug. “Can I go in?” Charlie asked in a small voice, barely above a whisper. Sarah smiled softly at him. “It’s not a problem with me, darling.” She smiled. “Just give me a second.”

Sarah popped her head back into the room where the nurse was securing a blood pressure cuff around Nick’s arm again as he slept. “Is it alright if his boyfriend comes in?”

The nurse looked up and saw Charlie hovering in the doorway, “of course love, come in. I’m just doing some checks on him.” Sarah smiled reassuringly at Charlie and gestured for him to go inside. “I’ll give you a few minutes with him,” she said kindly,
Charlie took a deep breath and walked up to Nick. The nurse had finished checking his blood pressure and was tucking him back in under the warm blankets. “All yours,” she smiled. “His temperature is up a bit, but not in the normal range yet, so make sure he stays under the blankets ok?” Charlie nodded and sat down beside the bed. He gently stroked Nicks cheek, examining his face carefully. He was still obviously cold, shivering slightly. His face was grimaced slightly as if in pain. “Nick?” Charlie whispered, “I’m here babe.”
Nick could hear Charlie’s voice. But that wasn’t possible. He was visiting family over an hour away. He couldn’t be here. He felt someone stroking his cheek tenderly. That felt like Charlie. Was he imagining things with his concussion? Nick forced his eyes open, “Char?” He whispered hoarsely. Charlie beamed at him, “hey, how are you feeling? Does your head hurt at all?”
Nick gave him a small smile, “you’re here.” Charlie chuckled, “I’m here. Where else would I be after getting the most frightening phone call of my life. You scared the shit out of me babe!” Nick sighed. God his head hurt, he felt a bit sick actually. “I’m so sorry,” he closed his eyes, he was so tired. “You saved my life Charlie,” he muttered. Charlie scoffed, “Nick I was miles away I didn’t do anything.” Nick cracked his eyes open again, “if you hadn’t answered the phone and got help I’d still be there.” Charlie didn’t want to think about that. “You didn’t answer my question, how are you feeling?”
Nick paused. He didn’t want Charlie to worry, but he felt like death. And he was feeling more and more sick as the seconds went by. “Um, I feel like shit actually. I have a headache, I feel sick…..actually, I think I’m gonna be sick.” Charlie’s eyes widened as Nick tried to sit himself up. But he was so tightly wrapped up in the blankets he couldn’t sit up. He turned his head to the side and started to gag. Charlie kept into action, seeing a small sick bowl next to him he snatched it and got it under nicks chin just in time. Nick coughed and spluttered as he threw up, mostly into the bowl. Sarah came rushing in, she took the bowl from Charlie who was grateful take a step back. “It’s ok Nick,” she soothed, “just get it all out.” Nicks eyes were watering, his head was pounding and he was mildly embarrassed that he just vomited in front of Charlie. “Sorry,” he choked out. Sarah tutted, “don’t be silly darling, do you think you are done?” Nick nodded and turned his head away. Sarah pushed the button for the nurse who arrived quickly. “Feeling nauseous Nick?” He nodded at her. “That’s not surprising with your concussion. I’ll get the doctor to prescribe something to help you so you can rest.” She took the bowl away and cleaned up the small mess on the floor. Sarah rubbed his arm gently.
Charlie watched from the side, he felt so awful for Nick who just looked exhausted. They were interrupted by a doctor who came in. “Good evening, I’m just going to give your son some medicine in his IV to help combat the nausea.” Then I’m going to stitch up that cut on his head.” Sarah thanked him as he spoke to the nurse, giving her instructions for the equipment he wanted. He untucked the blankets to locate Nicks cannula. “That should help you feel better Nicholas,” he said. “Thank you,” Nick replied softly. He wasn’t looking forward to the next bit. The doctor used the controls on his bed to get him to a sitting position which instantly made him feel dizzy. He closed his eyes and took slow breaths to try to get the room to stop spinning. His arms were now free from the blankets and he instantly reached over for Charlie, grasping his hand firmly. “Am I allowed to stay?” Charlie looked pleadingly at Sarah. “If it’s ok with the doctor then it’s ok with me.” The doctor gave a small nod. “Just keep him calm and distracted for me ok? I’m going to inject an anaesthetic around the wound so we can stitch it up more easily. I’ll need to shave a bit of his hair too I’m afraid.”
Charlie rubbed Nicks hand tenderly as the doctor prepared the syringe. Nick hissed in pain as he was injected numerous times to numb the area. A nurse came in with clippers and carefully clipped away a section of his hair. That was going to look awful, Nick thought. They waited a few minutes for the numbing to take effect. Nick was still wrapped in blankets and heat packs. “Well done Nicky,” Sarah said, she was sitting next to Charlie. It felt odd to her not to be the one holding his hand through this, but she could see that he needed Charlie right now.
The doctor took a long time cleaning the cut before he began stitching Nick up. It was a long and uncomfortable process for Nick, who just wanted to lie down and sleep. He could feel each stitch going in, even though they weren’t painful. Finally the doctor was finished. “Well done darling,” Sarah smiled at him,. “That was 10 stitches!”
The doctor put a small dressing over the top of the wound and then removed his gloves, tossing them in a bin. “Ok, Nick, we want to keep an eye on you overnight. A porter will be along shortly to move you onto the ward. Take care of yourself ok?” He patted Nick on the shoulder as he left.
Nick laid his head back carefully, not wanting to knock the stitches. He really didn’t want to stay in the hospital. He wanted to go home. He looked at his mum, bottom lip wobbling, “will you stay with me?” He sounded so young at that moment it broke Sarah’s heart. “Of course I will darling,” she squeezed his hand gently.
Nick closed his eyes briefly, then shot up in bed, “where’s Nellie?” He looked fearfully at both Sarah and Charlie. Was she out there in the cold, lost? Sarah quickly reassured him. “Don’t you remember darling, she’s with Tao. Elle came with you in the ambulance.” Nick sighed with relief. He didn’t remember much to be honest. He remembered being cold and phoning Charlie. There were snatches of memories of the ambulance and lots of doctors. But all he really remembered of the whole thing was being so cold. Probably due to the concussion he guessed. He wondered if he’d ever remember it all.
Jane knocked softly on the door. “Charlie, we should be heading home. It’s late and everyone is exhausted.” Charlie wanted to protest but he knew his mum was right. He wouldn’t be allowed up on the ward with Nick anyway. “Ok, let me say bye first?” Jane smiled at him before hugging Sarah. “Call me Sarah if you need anything ok?” Sarah promised she would.
Charlie kissed Nick softly on the forehead. “Get better soon, I’ll see you tomorrow,” Nick nodded sleepily. Charlie held his hands for a moment before getting up and leaving with Jane.

Nick spent the night in a small room on the ward. Sarah didn’t leave his side, she was there when he woke in the night feeling sick, she rubbed his back as he threw up in the small little bowl. His temperature had finally reached normal levels but now he felt feverish and unwell. The doctor had warned he was bound to feel poorly after suffering hyperthermia. He prescribed some pain killers for the head injury and bed rest for the sprained ankle. Nick was desperate to get home to Nellie. As soon as the doctors gave him the all clear to go home he was ready to go. Sarah had nipped home to get some clothes for him as the ones he was wearing that night were ruined. She also took a detour to pick up Nellie from Tao’s so that she was home ready for Nick. Tao had spoilt Nellie rotten, letting her sleep on his bed with him as she was obviously confused about where her boy had gone. He’d taken her for a short walk first thing too so Sarah wouldn’t have to worry about doing so herself. He knew Nick wouldn’t be able to for a while. Sarah felt warm inside when she thought about the friends Nick had made recently. They all seemed to care so much about him, it made her so happy.
She arrived at Nicks room with a bag of clothes for him to find him sitting up in bed, waiting for her.
“You ready to get out of here?” She smiled at him. He took the bag off her and started changing out of his gown. “Need some help?” Sarah watched him struggle for a bit, his ankle making it tricky along with the dizziness from the concussion.
“No, I can do it,” he said stubbornly. He managed to take his arms out the gown and slip a tshirt over his head but it knocked against his stitches and he hissed in pain. “Of for fucks sake,” he sighed, “I cant do it.” Sarah decided to let the language slide for today. “Baby, let me help you,” she reached into the bag and pulled out a zippy hoodie, helping him put his arms in and zipping it up. “I brought you some comfy joggers, slide your legs over the edge and we can get them on.”” Nick felt his cheeks flush with embarrassment that his mother was helping him get dressed. It was humiliating. But at the same time he really didn’t have a choice unless he wanted to go home in a hospital gown which would be far worse. Sarah helped him put his feet into the joggers, being careful of his swollen and strapped up ankle. He leaned against her as he stood up and pulled them up, then she leaned down and put a sock and shoe on his good leg. “There, all done that wasn’t so bad was it?” She grinned at him. Nick huffed, “I guess not. Thanks mum.”
Sarah reached for the crutches leaning against the wall. “The nurse suggested a wheelchair to get to the car. It’s parked a fair distance away in the car park and you are going to be very unsteady for a few days.” She popped into the corridor returning with a hospital wheelchair. Nick reluctantly agreed with her that the way his head felt there was no way he’d manage to use crutches that far. He gingerly moved himself into the wheelchair and held onto the crutches that the hospital had loaned him for the next couple of weeks. Sarah placed the bag on his knee and wheeled him towards the exit. They paused at the nurses station to thank them for looking after Nick so wel. Then they made their way out into the sunshine. It was freezing and Nick no longer had a coat. Sarah walked as quickly as she could to her car, helping Nick to get comfortable in the passenger seat. She pulled the seat back as far as it would go to give him extra leg room. She had brought a blanket with her which she placed over him and she put the heater on full blast. “I’ll just pop the wheel chair back and then we’ll be on our way.” Nick nodded and closed his eyes, he was exhausted.

They drove the short distance home. Nick used his crutches to get from the car to the house, he could hear Nellie barking from inside. “Let me put her in the kitchen darling while you get settled. Bed or sofa?” Nick wasn’t allowed to watch television so he decide his bed was best. Sarah helped him carefully up the stairs and into bed where she propped his sore ankle up on pillows. She closed the curtains and turned on a night lamp so it wasn’t too bright. “You ready for some company?” She smiled at her son who was bundled under the blankets. He grinned at her.
Sarah opened the kitchen door, “Nellie, find Nick!” She commanded. Nellie raced into the lounge, then barrelled up the stairs towards his room. She lept at the bed and crash landed on top of Nick. “Oof, careful girl!l” Nick laughed as she licked his face, obviously thrilled to see him. “I’m sorry I scared you Nel,” Nick breathed in her fur and stroked her head. “You are such a clever girl staying with me and not running off.” Nellie borked happily and then settled down at his side, sighing contentedly. Nick closed his eyes as he absent mindedly tickled her tummy. “Good plan Nellie, let’s have a nap.”
Sarah popped up a few minutes later to find both Nick and Nellie fast asleep. She tiptoed back out and down the stairs to make herself much needed cup of coffee. She’d already text the Springs to say that they were home so she knew she had about half an hour before Charlie arrived to be with Nick. But for now he had Nurse Nellie to look after him and she could finally breathe a sigh of relief that this whole ordeal was over.

Chapter Text

Nick bounced down the stairs, he’d over slept. Technically, no. He’d woken up on time when his alarm first sounded. He had just chosen to snooze it countless times which lead to him having to have the worlds quickest shower. He rushed in to the kitchen, still buttoning up his shirt. Sarah, who was stirring some milk in to two mugs of tea, shot him an amused smirk. “This is why we get up when our alarm first goes off..”  Nick just rolled his eyes as he slung his tie around his check. He felt all over the place this morning. He hadn’t slept well to be perfectly honest. His throat felt a little scratchy and sore. It was weird, he didn’t feel unwell or feverish or anything. It was more of an irritation than anything but it had kept him awake for most of the night, much to his annoyance as he had now overslept and at this rate he wasn’t going to be able to meet Charlie for cuddles before form like they done most mornings.  Sarah handed the mug over to her son. “Do you want some toast?” She asked as she popped two slices of bread in to the toaster for herself.  Nick scrunched his face up. His throat hurt slightly, the thought of swallowing crispy bread didn’t sound enjoyable.  “No thanks mum.” He said, surprising himself at how scratchy his voice sounded. “I’ll just have cereal.” Sarah frowned hearing the hoarseness behind her sons voice as she watched as as reached for a clean bowl off the rack and grabbed the box of cornflakes off the counter, pouring himself a generous amount, adding milk and flopping down at the dining table. Sarah began buttering her toast, giving her youngest a sideward glance. “You okay Nicky?” She asked softly “You sound like you’re getting a cold..” Nick glanced up from his breakfast bowl. The last thing he needed was his mum fussing over him because he knew the second she suspected he was any kind of unwell she would banish him to bed. School. He wouldn’t mind missing school but if he didn’t attend school today then that would been he wouldn’t be allowed to participate in tomorrow’s rugby match and he had to. He was the captain after all. He couldn’t let his team down all because he had a little tickle in his throat.

“I’m fine mum.” Nick assured her as he polished off his bowl of cornflakes before they became soggy. He then picked up his steaming mug of tea, taking a sip. The warm liquid felt nice against his achey throat. “You sure, darling?’ Sarah asked. She knew how stubborn her sixteen year old son could be. He’d never admit to feeling ill until it was blatantly evident that he was. There was the time last term that Nick had come down with a god awful flu virus, yet persisted he was fine until she had to pick him up from the school nurse office before lunchtime with a raging fever and his tail between his legs. “Yeah, I’m fine.” Nick replied as he took his bowl over to the sink and rinsed it out. Sarah wasn’t completely convinced but she decided to leave it for now as she washed up her own plate and finished up her tea.  “We better go or we will both be late.” She said picking up her keys and handbag.  Nick slung his school bag over his shoulder and followed his mum out to the car. He was fine. Nothing to worry about. Nothing more than just a little scratchy throat.

That was what Nick thought anyway, but as the day went on. His throat got progressively worse. It was sore and raw. His voice was hoarse and croaky and he’s developed an irritating cough. Charlie could see right through his boyfriend’s claims of “I’m fine.” and “I’m not sick..” but Nick was a stubborn one, refusing to admit it. Charlie’s suggestion that he go see the nurse was apparently ludicrous and unnecessary. Nick just continued to shrug it off that he was feeling fine. He was, after all. He would get through the rest of the school day, go home, have a warm shower and have an early night so that he was feeling right as rain tomorrow. This was an important match. It was their chance to redeem themselves against St Johns after the disastrous last game. Luckily for Nick, the school cafeteria was serving lentil soup, which was much more gentle on his sore throat than the ham and cheese baguette that Sarah had packed him this morning. “Why won’t you just admit that you don’t feel well?” Charlie asked as he sat across from Nick at their usual ‘lunch’ table, located in the art department. They both ate in here most days, apart from the occasional day that they agreed to sit with Tao and Isaac on the field, but Isaac had library duty this lunch time and Tao was having lunch with Elle. Nick stirred his polystyrene cup of soup with a spoon, making no real effort of eating it. Charlie eyed his boyfriend up if he continued to play with his food. The roles were completely reversed as it was normally the other way around.  “There’s nothing to admit, Char..” Nick replied as he brought a heaped spoonful of lentil soup to his lips, just to prove a point. Charlie just sighed in defeat. He knew there was more to this but he knew not to push it, he just hoped Nick would come to his senses sooner rather than later.

By the end of school there was no denying that Nick was coming down with something. It felt like there were razor blades in his throat every time he swallowed. He was so glad to get home, closing the door behind him with a sigh. His mum wasn’t due back from work for a couple of hours and he needed to walk Nellie before her dinner time. He shuffled into the kitchen and popped the kettle on, then rummaged in the cupboard for the lemsip. He made himself a cup, adding honey to make it taste bearable. Nellie nudged his legs, impatient for her walk. “In a minute Nel” he whispered. He plonked himself down at the kitchen table and sipped his drink, wincing at the pain as he swallowed. He absent mindly stroked the top of her head as he drank. The heat soothed his throat and the steam cleared his head slightly. Sighing, he put his cup in the sink, grabbed Nellie’s lead and clipped it to her collar. It wasn’t her fault he felt like death warmed up and she’d been cooped up on her own all day. He grabbed his coat, keys and phone and headed out to the park. Half an hour later, he was sat shivering on a park bench, throwing the ball for Nellie, who despite her years still acted like a puppy. Her tongue was lolling happily out of her mouth. “One more throw Nels, then home.” She cocked her head at him as if understanding, happily chasing the ball across the grass. Nick whistled for her and she came back, sitting by his feet as he put her lead back on. They slowly walked back to the house. Nick filled her bowl up with food, then immediately went up to his room to lay down. He felt dreadful. He pulled the duvet up to his chin and closed his eyes.

The next thing he knew he was being shaken awake by Sarah. “Nick, I’ve been calling you for the past five minutes. Dinner is on the table!” She eyed him carefully, he looked pale and exhausted. “You ok baby?” Nick forced himself upright, rubbing his face to try and rid himself of the tiredness seeping into his bones. “Yeah,” he croaked, “I’m fine.” He cleared his throat then tried again, “I’m fine,” it came out like a whisper. Sarah glared at him. “Well you don’t sound fine baby, you sound dreadful.” Nick sat up on the edge of the bed. He was not sick, he was just a bit run down and tired. An early night and he’d be right as rain for the rugby match tomorrow. “I’m fine,” he repeated.  Sarah sighed, she wished he wasn’t so stubborn, though she knew he got that trait from her so she couldn’t be too hard on him. “If you say so darling…..come on let’s have dinner.” Nick followed her down the stairs, leaning against the bannister more than usual, he felt wiped out. He coughed, wincing at the pain in his throat. Sarah glared at him but kept quiet. He’d admit it eventually. 

They sat together at the dining table. Nick was pushing the spaghetti bolognaise round his plate. He had zero appetite but he could feel Sarah’s eyes on him so he shovelled some onto his fork and swallowed it down, ignoring the protests in his throat. “How was school?” Sarah asked him. She’d already finished her dinner and was watching him carefully. Nick shrugged, “the usual,” he croaked. Sarah gathered up her plate and cutlery. “Nicky, darling I can tell you don’t feel well. You can leave your dinner if you like. Go get into bed and I’ll bring you up a nice cup of tea. Or would you prefer a lemsip?”  Nick looked at her gratefully. “Yeah ok,” he whispered. “I had a lemsip when I got in from school,” he admitted. Sarah tutted. “Honestly Nicky, I don’t know why you try to hide it from me when you feel poorly. I’ll bring you a tea now, and another lemsip in an hour or so.” He smiled at her sheepishly and trudged back upstairs. He changed into comfy pj bottoms and a white t shirt and snuggled under the covers. Sarah appeared a few minutes later with a steaming cup of tea and a thermometer. She placed it in his ear and waited for the beep. “38.2 you have a fever baby,” she gently felt his forehead, hissing at the heat coming from him. “Get some rest. I expect you’ll be off school tomorrow. I can call you out tomorrow.” Nicks eyes widened, “no!” He croaked hoarsely. “I can’t miss the match tomorrow, the team needs me.” Sarah sighed and gave him a look. “Let’s not argue about it now, we can see how you feel in the morning ok?” Nick nodded and sagged back against his pillow. 

Nick woke to his alarm blaring out at 6.45am. He reached out his hand to grope for his phone on the bedside cabinet, hitting the screen until the noise stopped. He had slept terribly, tossing and turning most of the night. He was either shivering with cold or sweating with fever. His throat felt like sandpaper and had kept him awake all night. Blearily, he tried to focus on his screen, seeing a notification from Charlie.

Hey babe, how are you feeling? Sleep ok? Love you xxx

Nick sighed. He knew he could be honest with Charlie and tell him he felt awful, but then he’d end up being forced to stay home and miss the game. He typed out a quick response saying he felt fine and then forced himself out of bed and into the shower. Sarah was pottering about in the kitchen, making tea when she heard the shower go on. She sighed to herself. Her stubborn son obviously thought he was well enough to go to school. She’d heard him in the night, coughing, tossing and turning. She’d checked on him a couple of times, convinced he still had a fever. She made him a lemsip instead of a cup of tea and sat at the table to wait for him. Eventually she heard him plodding down the stairs. “Morning baby, how are you feeling this morning?” Nick plastered on his best smile and replied, “I’m fine,”. Well he tried to reply but no noise came out, just a small wheezy croak. He coughed to clear his throat and tried again, “I’m fine,” but still no voice came out. Sarah eyed him suspiciously. “Nicky? Have you lost your voice?” He sighed and sat down next to her, grasping the mug with both hands, enjoying the warmth it provided. “I feel fine, it’s just sore,” he whispered, Sarah strained to hear him. “Baby you can’t go to school with no voice. Just let me call in for you. You can rest on the sofa and watch Marvel movies all day.” Nick looked at her, that did sound appealing. But if he was out of school today then Charlie would be forced to play the whole match against St John’s and after last time there’s no way he would let that happen.  He shook his head. “ I’ll be fine.” He mouthed at her. He drained the last of the lemsip and grabbed his school bag. “You aren’t leaving this house without breakfast young man,” Sarah scolded him. She opened the cupboard and retrieved a breakfast bar for him. “Here, eat that on your way ok? And Nicky, phone me if you feel poorly, I can come and get you.” Nick gave her a small nod and a smile and left the kitchen. He sat on the bottom stair to put on his shoes. He felt so rough. His throat was burning. He still felt like he had chills. He glanced at himself in the hallway mirror, flattening his hair down. He looked poorly. Pale with rosy flushed cheeks and a thin layer of sweat at his hairline. Looking away, he grabbed his rugby bag and stepped outside. The freshness of the morning felt nice on his flushed cheeks but breathing in the cool air hurt this throat. He zipped his jacket up and started the walk to school.

It took Nick double the time that it would normally take him to walk to school, mainly because he was walking slower due to how to how dreadful he was feeling.  He was beginning to wish that he had just stayed in bed that morning. Curled up in bed under his warm duvet, unlimited Nellie cuddles and Sarah there to look after her as she worked at home on Friday’s anyway. It sounded bliss but he was the rugby captain. He couldn’t let his team down, not today. This was too much of an important game for him to forfeit.  Nick made it to school just in time for form. He rushed in to the room just as Mr Lange was about to read out attendance. He muttered a quick apology for his lateness although it came out barely a whisper. He rushed over to back of the room, taking his usual seat next to Charlie.  Charlie glanced at his boyfriend, a bemused smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Cutting it a bit fine this morning, are we not?”    He joked and then smiled.  “Hi…” 

“Hi…” Nick responded although there was no sound to it other than a little croak. Charlie frowned. “Nick? Are you sure you should be here?” He sighed. “You sound awful…” he then studied his boyfriend’s face properly and sighed.  “You look awful, too.”     “Gee, thanks Char…” Nick tried to reply but it just came out as a pained whisper.  Charlie put his finger to the older boys lips. “Sssh…” he said.  “It’s obviously hurting you to speak.”   Charlie noticed the glassy look in Nick’s eyes, he hesitated before placing his hand on Nick’s forehead.  “You’re burning up Nick you absolute donut..”   Nick swatted Charlie’s hand away and ripped a piece of paper out of his binder, he reached into his pencil case, grabbing a pen and began scribbling something down he then slid the piece of paper over the table.  

I am completely fine, Char. You worry too much x 

Charlie read the message and rolled his eyes.  “You most probably have a fever and you’ve lost your voice. You are not fine…” he stated, shaking his head. “I really think you should go home.”   He watched as Nick vigouriy shook his head and tore out another piece of paper. I can’t!! The rugby match is today he scribbled down. Charlie sighed.  “Nick. I’m sure the guys will understand if you’re not feeling well.” Nick shook his head again.  I’m doing the game, Charlie.He wrote down.  Charlie sighed again. He knew how stubborn Nick could be. He knew how proud he was, too. He wouldn’t want to be the one to let the side down. He was a people pleaser, but he had to put himself first for once but he knew it was no use. Nick wasn’t going to listen to him, but he knew someone he would listen to. Charlie pulled his phone out and scrolled down his contact list until he located Sarah’s number. He was about to start a new chat with her when he realised she had already messaged him.

Hi Charlie, darling. You have probably noticed by now that Nicky is a little under the weather this morning but as the stubborn bugger that he is was very persistent on going to school. Can you do me favour and keep an eye on him since he has a blatant disregard for his own health and if he seems any worse will you message me?   I am working from home today so I can swing by and pick him up at any time 🙂 xx 

Charlie smiled softly at Sarah’s message. He can imagine Nick being very persuasive that he’s fine but he clearly was not fine.   Charlie glanced to the side to see Nick looking at him, curiously.  “Just a funny text from Tao.” He lied, hoping Nick would buy it, which he did as he just shrugged.  He knew his boyfriend would be mardy if he learned that his mother and boyfriend were secretly texting behind his back.

The rest of the day was hellish for Nick. His voice was completely gone by lunchtime, the croaky sound that he had been making this morning was barely even audible anymore.  His throat was burning. He felt shivery and hot at the same time and his cough had gotten worse as well. He was thankful for the honey and lemon throat lozenges that Sarah has obviously snuck in to his bag this morning. By the time school ended and he was getting changed for the rugby match was when he started feeling really bad.  He was just glad that St John’s were coming to them for a change and they were playing the game on their own turf because the thought of getting on a crowed mini bus was not a pleasant one.   Nick sat down out the bench as he laced up his rugby boots. He let out a hoarse cough.  Charlie winced from beside him.   “You Ok, mate??” Sai asked from his opposite side as he glanced at his friend, concerned.   “Yeah that cough don’t sound too good.” Christian chimed in.  Nick just responded with a thumbs up, he knew for a fact if his mates knew that he had lost his voice that they would tell coach Singh and she definitely wouldn’t let him play.  Charlie sighed. He knew Nick was in no fit state to be playing the game especially when it was raining outside.  It wasn’t heavy but if Nick was already poorly then this was a really bad idea. He didn’t want to go behind Nick’s back though he just hoped coach Singh would take one look at Nick and forbid him from playing.

“Right boys, 2 laps of the field to warm up, then stretches.” Coach Singh yelled out at the group as the emerged from the changing rooms. A chorus of groans greeted her as they all set off at a light jog. Charlie fell in beside Nick, cautiously keeping an eye on him as they ran. His breathing sounded chesty and his face looked pained each time he took a breath in. “You ok?” He asked as they completed the first lap. “Yep, fine,” he huffed out. He felt so rough. Running was making his throat hurt so much, it felt like razor blades every time he took a breath in. He coughed harshly as they finished up the second lap causing Coach Singh to look over in his direction. “Alright Nick?” She took in his dishevelled appearance. “Are you feeling ok?” Nick took a few sips from his water bottle. “I’m fine,” he croaked out. Singhs eyes widened. “You sound terrible Nick, are you sure you should be playing?” Nick looked at her with determination. “It sounds worse than it is,” he whispered. “I feel fine.” Coach Singh wasn’t convinced but she decided to give him the benefit of the doubt for now. She’d keep a close eye on him throughout the game though.

The St John’s players jogged onto the pitch. “I think they are even bigger than last time,” Charlie complained to Nick. “Please be careful out there babe.” Nick gave him a hug and took his place on the field. He was determined not to think about how ill he felt for the next hour while they played. If anything could take his mind off his sore throat it was rugby.  The first half was brutal. St John’s were as ruthless as last time. Truham had managed to score a few points this time but were still being utterly thrashed. They were all bruised and battered as the whistle went for half time. Nick felt like he was hanging on by a thread. He’d taken a few knocks and was finding it difficult to catch his breath. He collapsed onto the grass with a sigh and downed his water bottle. He rested his head on his knees. Charlie came to sit with him, “those guys are insane.” He grumbled, “I swear they aren’t our age really. Some of them have full on beards!” Nicks smiled at him. “I know,” he croaked out before dissolving into a coughing fit which left him clutching his chest. “Babe this is ridiculous, please come off the pitch now.” Charlie held his arm gently. Nick shook his head and held his hand up while he composed himself. “ it’s ok, I can finish it,” he whispered out. Charlie held out his own water for him, “drink this then. I have some paracetamol too if you want some?” Nick nodded gratefully and popped the two tablets into his mouth, swallowing them down with water. 

The second half began. Nick was being marked by possibly the largest player on the other team. Every time Truham managed to get the ball to him he was tackled to the ground . Each time it got harder and harder to get back up again. Suddenly he had the ball in an open space. He could hear his team mates screaming at him to run. So he did. He sprinted towards the touch line, his throat and chest screaming in pain. He was so close to scoring a much needed try and getting them a few more points when the giant player caught up with him. He knew he wasn’t running his fastest, he wasn’t at his best. He felt the player grip him around his middle, squeezing his chest as he brought him down to the ground. He landed with a thud, the St John’s player on top of him. He felt the air leave his lungs. Dark spots dotted his vision as he struggled to catch his breath. He couldn’t get enough air in as he coughed and coughed. He rolled onto his back, his mouth open as he struggled to breathe. His lungs were screaming at him.  The St John’s player held out his hand to help him up before realising something wasn’t quite right. He looked over to the sidelines, “I think we need some help!” He yelled over. Coach Singh ran across and kneeled down next to Nick, who was still struggling to catch his breath, coughing violently, tears spilling down his cheeks.

“Hey it’s ok Nick, just calm down, nice slow breaths.” She helped him to sit up. Nick tried to slow his breathing to match hers but he couldn’t stop coughing. Charlie jogged over with his water bottle, handing it to Coach Singh. “Here, Nick take a small sip ok?” Nick took the bottle with trembling hands and managed to swallow a small sip. It calmed his throat slightly and allowed him to take a breath. “There you go. Small sips and slow breaths ok?” Nicks nodded at her, feeling the oxygen returning to his screaming lungs. His throat felt like it was on fire. His head was pounding and he felt really lightheaded.  “I’m calling it. Nick, you are subbed. Charlie take over please.” Nick looked ready to protest but one look at Singhs face told him not to bother. Charlie squeezed his shoulder. “Games nearly over anyway Nick. It’ll be fine.” Nick stood up slowly, the world spinning as he did. He leaned on CoachSingh as he made his way to the sidelines, collapsing onto the ground as soon as he was clear of the pitch. “I’m calling your mum to let her know.” Coach Singh told him. “You need to go home to bed Nick. I never should have let you play in the first place.” 

Nick leaned against the bench, closing his eyes. He didn’t have the energy to move. He listened to the sounds of the game. He could tell St John’s had scored at least two more tries since he came off the pitch. Finally the whistle went and the game was over. He hadn’t moved an inch. Charlie came over and sat down next to him. He nudged his shoulder. “Hey, babe, your mum is here to pick you up? We need to go.” Nick forced one eye open. “Ok,” he whispered but made no effort to move. Charlie smiled at him, “come on, I’ve picked up all your stuff from the changing room, her car is literally over there.” He pointed to the staff car park that Sarah had driven into. Nick sighed and tried to get up off the floor. He just wanted to sleep.Charlie held out his hands which Nick took gratefully. He hauled himself upright, swaying with dizziness. A hacking cough overtook him and his eyes watered as his throat burned. He held on tight to Charlie as they slowly made their way to the car.  “Oh Nicky,” Sarah cooed as she climbed out of the car to help Charlie. “Why on earth did you insist on playing today. You looked like death warmed up.” Nick didn’t have the energy to answer her. He just sat down in the passenger seat with a sigh. He turned the heating  on high and sat shivering, feeling completely miserable.

Nick closed his eyes as Sarah began driving. He was far too tired, he leaned his head against the cold window. Charlie had clambered in to the back of car. Sarah offering to drop him home.  “Do you mind if I come back to yours for a bit? Just to make sure he’s alright?” Charlie asked, hesitantly. Nick was clearly not well at all and he’d feel much for comfortable making sure he was okay.   “My dad can pick me up later.”    Sarah smiled fondly at the younger boy through her mirror.  “Of course darling.”   She was so happy that Nicky had Charlie. He was everything she’d ever wanted in a partner for her son and so much more.    Charlie smiled and settled down in the backseat, scrolling through his instagram newsfeed. He could hear gentle snores coming from the seat in front of him.  He was glad Nick seemed to be getting some well needed rest.  He glanced up noticing that Sarah was driving in the opposite direction of home. Where was she going?   It all started making sense when they drove up outside the walk in clinic.  Nick was not going to be happy, not in the slightest.   “Just to be on the safe side.” Sarah said as she noticing the questioning look on Charlie’s face.  Charlie nodded. Nick barely had a voice and he was evidently poorlier than ever.  Sarah reached over, gently shaking her son’s shoulder.  “Nicky? Baby, wake up..” she said softly.   Nick let out a croaky groan and he rolled his head away from the window.  He blinked a few times, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes as he fumbled with the seatbelt release.  He sat up straight. He felt so so tired, he couldn’t wait to get inside, put some warm pjs on and crawl in to his bed. That’s when he realised his surroundings. He turned to look at Sarah, a scowl forming on his face. “No.” He said sourly, although it was no more than a croaky whisper.   Sarah sighed at her son. Always the dramatic.   “I want you to get checked out. 

“You’ve lost your voice baby and your glands look a little swollen.”  She commented as she unclipped her own seatbelt.   “It shouldn’t take very long.” She said, opening the car door and shooting her son a look that says. ‘This is final’  Nick groaned and sulked as he pulled himself out of the car. He couldn’t think of anything worse than being made to sit in a busy waiting room full of sick people when he felt so rotten.  Charlie couldn’t help but smile softly at his boyfriend’s tantrum like behaviour. It was very rare that he saw this side to Nick, but he knew that being poorly turned Nick in to an adult sized toddler.   Nick zipped his coat up to his chin as they trudged through the doors to the clinic. It was very busy. It would be considering it was after 4pm on a Friday, so many people desperate for an appointment before the weekend.  Sarah went straight over to the reception desk as Nick and Charlie found 3 chairs together in the corner of the room.  Nick groaned as he leaned his head on Charlie’s shoulder.  Charlie lifted his hand up, running it through Nick’s hair.  “You don’t feel well at all, do you?”  Nick just shook his head, closing his eyes and hoping this wait wasn’t very long.   “You shouldn’t have gone to school, Numpty.” Charlie sighed. He didn’t like seeing Nick unwell.   Sarah approached them and sat down on the other side of Nick.  “Hopefully shouldn’t be too long, sweetheart.” She soothed as she rubbed his arm.  Nick coughed into his elbow and lay his head back down on Charlie’s shoulder.  This was his idea of hell.   

In the end they had to wait around half an hour much to Nick’s distaste. The small waiting room was too busy and loud and reeked of cheap antiseptic.  His dull headache from before had intensified. His throat was so sore that even swallowing was painful and he still felt shivery, despite being bundled in a hoodie and his winter coat.  Sarah was starting to feel the mum guilt. Maybe she would have been better just taking Nicky home as she had a feeling the doctor was just going to tell them what she already suspects that Nick had a viral infection and just to treat him with home remedies and paracetamol, but they were here now so there was no harm in getting a second opinion.   “Nicholas Nelson?”     Nick’s head snapped up instantly in hearing his name. Finally. Get this over with and then he could go home.  Sarah stood up.  “Do you want me to come in with you, darling?”   Nick was seventeen years old and perfectly capable of going in to seeing the doctor on his own but she knew her son had a fear of doctors, hospitals and anything medical related.  “Please.” Nick croaked hoarsely. He then glanced at Charlie. His eyes pleading as he held out his hand. Charlie smiled softly as he stood up, taking Nick’s hand in his own and giving it a gentle squeeze.  “Try stopping me.” 

The next 10 minutes were awful for Nick as the doctor took his temperature, felt his glands, looked down the back of his throat with a torch, not to mention swabbing the back of his throat with a long cotton swab before diagnosing him with Laryngitis.  He explained that it would go away on its own. Nick just had to rest, drink plenty of warm fluids, gargle with cooled boiled salty water and take paracetamol or ibuprofen for the pain as well as over the counter cough medicines.   “Maybe some vocal rest.” The doctor suggested.  Nick just scoffed and trying to protest but no words came out. Sarah shot her son an amused look before glancing at the doctor.  “I’ll ensure he keeps quiet until his voice returns.”   Nick just wanted to get home and get in to bed now. When they returned to the car. Nick hopped in to the back with Charlie rather than getting in to the passenger seat. Charlie smiled as he clipped his seatbelt into place. Nick had sat in the middle seat so that he was able to rest his head on Charlie’s shoulder.  “You still coming back with us Charlie, love?” Sarah asked, glancing at him through the mirror. Nick instantly lifted his head off of Charlie’s shoulder and looked at his boyfriend with a hopeful expression on his face. Charlie chucked.  “Of course. Only if that’s okay.”     Sarah smiled.  “Absolutely! I don’t think Nicky’s giving us much choice.” She laughed, looking at her son fondly before turning back around to concentrate on the road.  Nick closed his eyes, struggling to stay awake for even a second longer. He was so tired.  Charlie glanced at his sleeping boyfriend. He couldn’t believe Nick had Laryngitis, no wonder he felt so crummy. He should have stayed in bed this morning, but instead dragged himself to school and then if that wasn’t bad enough, forced himself to play in the rugby match.   He knew why Nick did it. He didn’t like to show weakness and admit needing help, but sometimes he just had to.  

“Nicky! We’re home!!” Sarah announced as she pulled up in to the drive. Nick let out a little groan but made absolutely no effort to move. Charlie chuckled softly to himself as he unclipped his own seatbelt before running his fingers through Nick’s hair.  “Come on sleepyhead…” he said softly.  “You can’t stay out here…”   Nick let out another grunt. Walking the short distance between the car and his bedroom was going to feel like an absolute marathon.  Charlie chuckled at his boyfriend’s resistance.  “Nicholas Nelson don’t you make us carry you inside..” Sarah joked as she grabbed her bag from the passengers seat.  Nick lifted his head off of Charlie’s shoulder.  He felt so poorly. He just wanted to curl up and sleep, forever.  Charlie helped him unclip his seatbelt before opening the door and getting out. He extended his hand out for Nick, who gratefully took it as he pulled himself on to his feet with a groan.  Sarah unlocked the door and Nellie wasted no time in bouncing out to greet them the very second she had opened it.  “Hi Nellie, who’s a good girl.” Charlie cooed as she bounced up on his legs.  She did the very same thing to Sarah and Nick.  Nick would have normally dropped to his knees to greet his furry best friend but he just didn’t have the energy right now as he pattered in to the hallway, slipping off his Vans. Nellie preoccupied herself by picking one of Nick’s shoes up by the mouth and running off with it.  Nick let out a hearty chuckle but then winced as it hurt his already aching throat.  Sarah glanced at her son in sympathy as she hung up her coat.   “Bed or sofa??” She asked.  Nick thought about it for a minute. The sofa would be nice as the TV in the living room was bigger than the one in his bedroom but he also didn’t think he had the energy to even watch TV. His bed would definitely be comfier and he could bury himself under his duvet and blankets. He pointed towards the stairs.   Sarah smiled.  “Go on up. I will bring you both a hot drink in a minute.” 

Nick wasted no time in climbing up the stairs and as soon as he was in his room. He quickly changed out of his rugby kit and headed straight for the shower. He wanted nothing more than to just hop in to bed but he was filthy from the game. Charlie heard the water running only a few minutes after Nick had gone up stairs and decided to hang back, he spotted the bag of shopping that Sarah had obviously picked up when she had been out earlier, he picked it up and headed in to the kitchen where Sarah was pouring boiling water from the kettle in to cups.  She paused for a moment, hearing the water running. She then spotted the groceries in Charlie’s arms and smiled.  “Thank you darling.”  Charlie returned the smile as he started emptying the bag on to the counter.  “You don’t have to do that, love.” Charlie just shrugged. He didn’t mind. “I don’t mind.” He smiled as he separated the refrigerated and non-refrigerated items and began putting them away.  “I’ve made Nicky a lemsip.” She told him as she stirred in a heaped spoonful of honey, just the way she knew that her son liked it.  “I made you tea, though.” She smiled as she slid a second cup along the counter. Charlie grinned.  Sarah made the best tea.  He would even go as far as saying she made better cups than Nick and that was saying something but then come to think of it. Nick obviously learned his skill from someone.  “Thanks, Sarah.” He smiled as he took a sip of his tea.    “So how hard do you think it will be for Nick to not speak for a few days?” Charlie smirked. Sarah laughed.  “Oh incredibly…” she replied. She knew her son and she knew how much of a complete chatter box he was.  Charlie chuckled as he knew she had a very valid point there.  “You take those up, love.” Sarah smiled.  “I’ll be up shortly with some more medicine for Nick.”    Charlie nodded as he took hold of the steaming hot mugs and made for the stairs. Nellie happily trotting behind him. 

Nick was out of the shower and already dressed in Pyjamas by the time that Charlie reached his bedroom. Charlie placed the cups on the bedside table, watching as Nick towel dried his damp hair.   “It’s probably not a wise idea to sit with wet hair when you’re already sick.” He pointed out. Nick tossed the towel to the side and flopped down on to his bed, letting out a heavy grunt.  “It’ll dry..” He mumbled croakily. Charlie glanced at him. “No talking!”    Nick rolled his eyes as he slid under his duvet, patting the empty space beside him.  Charlie grinned as he sat down on the bed next to Nick.   “You need rest.” He commented.  Nick pulled the duvet up to his shoulder as he lay his head on Charlie’s chest.  Charlie made a mental promise there and then that he would nurse Nick through this illness until he was right and rain and back on his feet. He would hold a cold rag to his feverish forehead, make him endless cups of tea, god he would even resort to watching marvel movies if that was what Nick wanted to do. Nick was also so great at looking after him when he felt poorly or was just having a bad day so this was his way of repaying the favour. 

Chapter Text

“Come on Nick!” Darcy yelled. “I need you on my team!” Nick was sitting on the picnic blanket, Charlie on his lap. Charlie grinned at him. “Go on, go play sports. I’ll sit here and keep the blanket warm for you!” Nick kissed him softly on the lips. “It’s frisbee Char, you sure you don’t want to come join?” Charlie shook his head, “Nah, I’ll catch up with Isaac for a bit. Go have fun!” Nick smiled, kissed him once more then bounded over to the game like an energetic puppy. He turned and blew a kiss to Charlie before joining Darcy, Tara, Elle, Imogen and Sahar. “Ok what are the teams?” He asked. “How about Nick, Elle and me against Tara, Imogen and Sahar?” Darcy suggested. Everyone agreed and an enthusiastic and silly game of frisbee began. Darcy spent most of the game cheating by distracting Tara. There were lots of giggles and squeals of laughter as they played.
Charlie watched from the blanket, “you didn’t want to play?” Isaac asked him kindly. Charlie shook his head, “no, I’m quite happy to watch my gorgeous boyfriend from the comfort of my blanket.” He grinned at Isaac. It had been ages since the Paris Squad had all hung out like this. Everyone was so busy with school, band and part time jobs that finding an afternoon when they were all free was really hard. But it was Sahars birthday soon and they’d managed to find a free afternoon in the half term holidays to get together to celebrate. Sahar had suggested a picnic at the park, followed by a pizza evening at her house. Everyone had been looking forward to getting together for ages. The sun was shining, it was pleasantly warm out. Charlie watched as a dog walker struggled to keep control of the 6 dogs he had, their leads getting tangled up. He chuckled quietly to himself. He loved dogs but that looked like a horrendous job. He preferred his coffee shop shifts! He had a shift first thing in the morning so he wasn’t going to sleep over after the pizza night. Neither was Nick, who had rugby training early too.
“Shall we set up the food while they play?” Tao suggested. He started rummaging through all the carrier bags. “Hungry Tao?” Teased Isaac. Tao mock glared at him, “I’m just being a supportive friend, sorting the food out while they all throw that plastic disc around.” He gestured to the frisbee game which had now descended into a play fight on the ground. Nick was desperately trying to hold onto the frisbee, laughing hysterically as the other team tried to prise it out of his hands. “Cheaters!” He giggled. He finally relented as Tara began to tickle his ribs. “Fine, fine! I give up! You win!” He rolled out of the way and sat up a huge grin plastered to his face. He was having such a good day. Surrounded by his friends in the sunshine. He glanced over to Charlie and gave him a wave. Charlie grinned back. “Yeah it looks like the game has finished. Let’s get the food out.”
They’d all agreed to bring different things. Isaac, Tao and Charlie pulled out the Tupperwares of sandwiches, salads, crisps and dips. Charlie carefully opened Nicks box which was full of cupcakes he’d spent the morning baking. They arranged everything on the blanket. “Food!” Yelled Tao. Everyone descended on the blanket and started filling up their paper plates. “I’m starving,” Nick said as he put another sandwich on his plate. “ so I see!” Charlie smiled at him. Tao was distracted, waving his arms around. “ god why do bees always head for me,” he grumbled. Isaac chuckled at him. “Maybe if you kept still and stopped waving your arms like a windmill they’d leave you alone.” Nick laughed, reaching into the Tupperware full of chocolate biscuits. “Ouch!” He hissed, pulling out his hand to see a small bee attached to his wrist. He gently picked it off and examined his hand. “Oh my god have you been stung?” Charlie looked over at him. Nick shrugged, “yeah I guess so! I’ve never been stung before.” He looked at his wrist where there was a tiny puncture mark. “Huh, I thought it would hurt more than that!” He took the biscuit he was aiming for and took a bite.
“See Tao, you don’t need to be afraid of bees!” Elle teased him affectionately. Tao rolled his eyes. “Yeah yeah, I guess so. It really doesn’t hurt Nick?” He looked across at Nick who seemed distracted. He was staring intently at the picnic blanket, clearing his throat.
“Nick?” Charlie glanced over at him. Nick looked up at him,, eyes wide. “Um, I feel a bit weird,” he said. He kept clearing his throat. “Weird how?” Charlie felt a panic run through him.
“Um, my throats really itchy,” he tried to swallow. “I think it’s swelling up?” He looked at Charlie. He took a breath but he couldn’t get any oxygen in. His throat felt like it was closing up. He put his hands to his neck in panic, his eyes wide.
“What?” Charlie shrieked, causing the others to look over. “Nick, calm down, just take a breath ok nice and slow,” Charlie rubbed his back in an attempt to soothe him.
“What’s going on?” Tara looked over in horror. “Nick are you allergic to bee stings?”
Charlie looked on helplessly. “He’s never been stung before,” he cried. “Oh my god, Nick can you breathe?”
Nick shook his head in a panic. His throat was swelling up fast, his chest hurt. He felt like he was about to pass out. Every breath in felt like his was breathing through a blocked straw. He couldn’t get any words out but the look on his face was enough to send the whole group into a panic. “Someone call an ambulance,” shrieked Darcy.
Charlie pulled out his phone and dialled 999.
“Help please we need an ambulance, my boyfriend has been stung by a bee and he can’t breathe.”
“Ok, what is your location?”
“We are at Richmond Park, please he can’t breathe.”
“An ambulance has been dispatched. It will be with you shortly. Keep him calm.”
Charlie nodded tearfully as he gripped tightly onto Nicks hand. Nick’s face was red, he was desperately trying to take in oxygen but it was obvious he was fighting a losing battle. His eyes were squeezed shut and he was leaning heavily on Charlie.
“It’s ok babe, an ambulance is coming,” he soothed.
Suddenly Nick collapsed forward and slumped down onto the blanket. “Oh my god!” Tara sobbed. “He’s going to die!”

Charlie looked on horrified at his boyfriends lifeless form on the picnic blanket.  This wasn’t good. This wasn’t good at all. Charlie’s cousin was deathly allergic to nuts . She had to carry around an epipen to deliver an injection of life saving medicine any time she came in contact with any type of nut.  Charlie’s eyes widened.  Nick could die.  “He’s not breathing..” Tara shrieked hysterically as she held her hand against the pulse point in Nick’s neck. She couldn’t find his pulse. He had stopped breathing. This was so scary.  Tao pushed past the other who were standing there, mouths open in shock. They didn’t know what to do. Their friend was literally dying in front of their eyes.

‘Tao he needs help.” Issac commented watching as Tao dropped to his knees next to their unconscious friend. “I know!!” Tao exclaimed as he rolled Nick on to his side.  “That’s what I am trying to do.” He said desperately his he tilted Nick’s chin upwards, tucking one of his hands under his head, placing him in to the recovery position and trying to keep his airway clear.  Tao has never told anyone this before but after the sudden death of his father when he was 12 years old, following a heart attack. Tao and his mother, Yan had underwent an emergency first aid training course. Tao had never imagined having to use his learned skills, that was until now.    “Nick? Can you hear me?” He asked loudly. No response. Tao pressed his ear to Nick’s chest. “Shit!!” He said, shakily. This was bad. Really bad.  He rolled Nick flat on his back. He began performing CPR. He switched between giving 15 chest compressions at a time and then giving Nick 2 breaths. His palms were sweating and he was breathing heavily. It wasn’t working. Why wasn’t it working??  “C’mon Nick! Breathe!!!” Tao said desperately. The others looked on, too shocked to say anything. Elle, Imogen and Tara were full on sobbing, Sahar, Issac and Darcy were in a state of shock  Charlie gripped on to Tara’s hand, gripping it tightly as tears streamed down his face. Nick had to breathe. He couldn’t lose him. Not like this.

They were suddenly interrupted by the shrieking sirens of an ambulance as it pulled into the little carpark next to the grassy area that they were situated. The back door of it flew open and two paramedics rushed towards them. Tao quickly got to his feet standing up and allowing them to attend to Nick. “Help him, please!!” He begged.  “He’s not breathing.”     “What’s his name?” One of the paramedics asked the group.   “Nicholas. Nick Nelson..” Charlie said quickly.  “He…he’s 17.”   “Does he have a known allergy to bees?”  The other paramedic as his colleague injected a shot of epinephrine into Nick’s thigh.   “I…I don’t know….i don’t think so…” Charlie stuttered. “He said it’s his first time being stung.”  He watched as they injected Nick with another clear substance. He watched his boyfriend’s face. His face and arms were covered in hives, his skin had gone a ghostly white colour, apart from the blue tinge on his lips and eyelids.  The paramedic began administering CPR agin just like Tao had been doing previously. It was no use. Nick wasn’t breathing. His heart and brain were being starved of oxygen. This was critical. If they didn’t get the oxygen flowing immediately. Nick was going to die. “We are going to have to insert a Trach.” One of them said.  Charlie just watched on helplessly. What did that mean?    Charlie watched as the male paramedic went back to the ambulance and returned with a bag full of supplies while the other paramedic continued chest compressions.   He secured a pair of latex gloves on to his hands he then placed a sterile sheet on to the grass and began taking supplies out of the bag. Firstly a bottle of rubbing alcohol, a metal scalpel, a thin tube that looked a little thicker than a drinking straw known as an obturator, a tracheotomy tube and a role of medical tape.  He started off by cleaning the area with the rubbing alcohol as well as sterilising his instruments before making a small incision on the front of Nick’s neck, right where his trachea is.   Charlie had to look away. He couldn’t watch this.  The paramedic inserted the trachea tube into the hole that he had cut in Nick’s airway before inserting the smaller tube into the hole and taping everything into place.  The next couple of minutes were silent.

“He’s breathing.” Julie, the female paramedic announced after her colleague had inserted the tube in to the hole in Nick’s neck. “His breathing is shallow, we need to get him in the ambulance now!”    Charlie let out a breath that he had been holding in.  Nick was breathing. That was good wasn’t it?  But he could tell by the looks on the faces of the paramedics that Nick wasn’t completely out of the woods yet.  “Can I come too?” Charlie asked. He needed to be there with Nick. He couldn’t leave him on his own. “Please! I’m his boyfriend…”  the female paramedic smiled softly at him.  “Go on then.” She said nodding to the back of the ambulance as her colleague was securing Nick on the stretcher.   “I better call his mum, first.” Charlie said as he shakily took his phone out of his pocket.

The paramedic secured the straps of the stretcher, propping it up on to the wheels. He turned to look at the group of friends who still hadn’t uttered a word.  “Who gave him chest compressions?”  He asked.  Tao stepped forward.  “I did..” He said slowly, his eyes widened.  “Was that not the right thing to do?” He asked. His eyes wide in fear.  What if he had made things worse. Had he compromised Nick’s life even more?  The Paramedic gave him a small smile.  “You did completely the right thing.” He congratulated him. “Actually,  you may have just saved your friends life.” He stated.  “Keeping his heart beating.”    Tao watched as they loaded Nick in to the back of the ambulance.  He could hear Charlie’s frantic voice on the phone to Sarah.  “They’re taking him to Kent General.”  Charlie explained.  “I…I don’t really know. He’s had some sort of allergic reaction. He was stung by a bee. It’s bad, Sarah.” He decided to leave out the gory details of Nick’s condition and allow the medical professionals to break that to Sarah as he knew he wouldn’t be able to without getting hysterical.

Tao watched on as Charlie climbed into the back of the ambulance beside Nick. He felt numb. He couldn’t believe what had just happened. He felt Elle wrap her hands around his waist and rest her chin on his shoulders, from behind.   “That was amazing, Tao.” She said, the pride strong in her voice.   “Yeah, how on earth did you know how to do CPR like that. I would just panic and not know what to do…” Tara said.   Tao had essentially saved Nick’s life.  “Um…I…I took a first aid course.” Tao replied glancing between them.  “After….After my dad died. I decided I didn’t want to lose anyone else like that so if there was something I could do to help….”   Elle hugged him tightly.  “You’re amazing, Tao.”   “That was so scary.” Sahar sighed. “I know!” Imogen agreed.  “They had to cut a hole in his neck.” Darcy said, shuddering. She would never be able to forget that image.    “They had to do it.” Issac sighed.  “It was the only way to get him breathing again.”

The ambulance door slammed shut, making Charlie jump. He was sat at the foot of the bed on a small seat. Nick was laid on the stretcher, the paramedic was busy attaching wires to his chest and inserting a cannula into his hand. Nick was still completely still. Charlie couldn’t take his eyes off the tube sticking out of his throat. It looked like something out of a horror movie. His visible skin looked red and sore. He lent forward and stroked Nicks leg, the only part of him he could reach. “I’m here babe,” he soothed, “you’re going to be ok.” The paramedic turned to smile at him. “How long have you been together?” She asked. “Just over a year,” Charlie replied, his eyes never leaving Nick. “Well, he’s a fighter, that’s for sure.”
Charlie tried to smile but it came more as a grimace. He had literally watched Nick die. He’d stopped breathing, he was literally dead. If it hadn’t been for Tao knowing how to do CPR it might have been too late by the time the ambulance arrived. He let out a choked sob. The paramedic gave him a sympathetic smile. “You’ve been through a hell of a shock, it’s ok to be feeling whatever you are.” Charlie nodded at her. But it wasn’t about him, he refused to make this about his feelings. “Is he going to be ok?” He asked, his voice small.
The paramedic gave him a soft smile. “We’ve got him breathing again, that’s the main thing. But he’s not out of the woods just yet. He was oxygen deprived for a few minutes so he’ll need a lot of monitoring. We need to get the swelling down in his throat so that we can remove the trach.”

Nicks eyes fluttered open. He could feel the jostling of the ambulance as it sped towards the hospital. His whole body hurt, his skin felt like it was burnt. He tried to let out a groan but he couldn’t make any noise. Why couldn’t he speak? He started to thrash around, his hands coming up to his throat, which felt weird. he grazed the tube, his panic intensifying. What was going on? The monitor next to him started beeping in alarm.
“It’s ok Nick, just try to stay calm,” the paramedic soothed. “You’ve had a nasty reaction to a bee sting and your throat is swollen. We’ve inserted a tube to help you breathe. You won’t be able to talk. Just try to stay calm.”
But Nick was far too frightened to stay calm. The tiny tube in his throat only allowed a small amount of oxygen in, and he was struggling to get enough air as he panicked. He could hear Charlie frantically telling him to breathe slowly and calm down but he was in too much of a spiral to respond. The paramedic quickly inserted a liquid into his IV and he felt himself sinking back into the pillow. “Just a little something to keep him calm,” she told Charlie who was watching on in horror. Nick had looked so frightened, the panic in his eyes was heart breaking. He watched as the monitor readings calmed down and nicks eyes closed again.
The ambulance came to a stop outside the hospital and Nick was wheeled towards accident and emergency. Charlie followed behind as quickly as he could but was soon stopped by a strict looking nurse. “Sorry love, you can’t go through there. Take a seat and we’ll be out shortly.” Charlie looked on hopelessly as Nick was wheeled further away, through some big double doors and out of sight. He flopped down onto one of the plastic chairs in the waiting room. He couldn’t believe how the afternoon had turned out. Not in his wildest dreams would he expect to be sat in a hospital waiting room while his boyfriend was suffering a medical emergency. It was a literal nightmare.
He was interrupted from his spiral by Sarah rushing into the room, her eyes frantically searching for someone to talk to. She saw Charlie and raced over, pulling him into a tight hug which proved far too cathartic for Charlie who promptly burst into tears. “Oh Charlie, darling.” She soothed as she hugged him. He pulled back and looked at her through tear stained eyes. “What happened?” She asked, “where is Nick?”
Charlie took a deep breath. “Um. He went through there?” He pointed to the room at the end of the corridor. “ they wouldn’t let me go in.” Sarah nodded and squeezed his hands. “I’ll go find out how he’s doing.” She marched down the corridor and into the room. The sight in front of her would haunt her dreams for a long time to come. Nick was in the middle of the room, surrounded by doctors and nurses. They’d removed his shirt, he was covered by a small blanket up to his waist. There were wires attached to his chest and 2 IV lines in his arms. But the thing that sent a shock wave through her was the sight of a small tube sticking out of his throat. “Nicky? Baby?” She cried as she rushed over. “I’m his mum, what’s happening?” She looked anxiously at the doctor who was injecting something into his IV.
He gave her a kind smile. “Nick had an anaphylactic reaction to a bee sting. It caused various symptoms but the most serious was his throat swelled up. He was unable to breathe. CPR was performed at the scene and then continued by paramedics. They then performed a tracheostomy at the scene.” Sarahs hand flew up to her mouth, he couldn’t breathe? CPR? She stroked his hair softly, “mums here baby, you are going to be ok.” She looked at her doctor. “What happens now?” The doctor finished updating Nicks chart.
“He’s been given a sedative as he woke up very agitated in the ambulance. We will need to keep the trache in until his swelling reduces which could take a couple of days. He’s going to be very sore from the CPR too, we’ll need to do an X-ray to check for any cracked ribs which is really common with CPR. His skin is obviously very inflamed so we are giving him antihistamine along with the adrenaline he’s already had.” He put his hand gently on Sarah’s shoulder, he could see how visibly shocked she was by this news. “He’s going to be ok,” he reassured her. “It’ll take a bit of recovery time but I’m confident he’ll be ok. I’m taking him up for some scans and X-rays now because he was oxygen deprived for a few minutes. We just need to check everything is as it should be.” Sarah nodded. She leaned down to kiss Nick softly on his cheek. “I’ll be right here sweetheart, you just sleep my darling.” She watched as Nick was wheeled to the lift. As the doors slid closed she felt the tears begin to flow. Her baby had been through so much. She had no idea he was allergic to bee stings. This was all so surreal. A kind nurse spotted her and came over. “Why don’t we go and sit in the waiting room,” he suggested. “ I’ll get you a cup of tea while you wait.” He took her arm and led her back to where Charlie was sat nervously waiting for an update. He saw Sarah’s tear stained face, “is he ok?” He whispered. Oh my god what if something had gone wrong? Sarah sat next to to him, wiping the tears from her cheeks. “They’ve taken him for some scans. They need to check he’s ok after being oxygen deprived. They also said he may have cracked ribs from the cpr.” She looked at him, “who performed it on him?”
“Tao,” Charlie whispered. “He was amazing. We all panicked but he knew what to do.” Sarah felt more tears coming. She could never thank Tao enough for what he had done. He was a hero in her eyes.
The nurse reappeared with two cups of tea, “I’ve popped some sugar in them, it’s good for shock,” he said kindly. Sarah thanked him and sat down on the empty seat next to Charlie. Now they just had to wait.
They were interrupted from their quiet thoughts by the rest of their friends bundling into the waiting room. “Charlie!” Tara exclaimed as they all came over to where they were sitting. “How is he?” They all hugged Charlie, looking anxiously at them for news. Sarah only had eyes for Tao. She walked over to him and hugged him so tightly. “Thank you,” she whispered. “You saved my baby’s life.” Tao felt tears springing to his eyes. He had been so worried he’d made things worse. He hugged her back, “I just wanted to try and help.” He replied quietly. Sarah looked at him intently, “you saved his life.” She repeated, wiping the tears gently from his cheeks. “I can never thank you enough.”

“How did you know what to do?” Sarah asked, intrigued.  So, so infinitely thankful that Tao had known what to do and had stepped up, saving her son’s life.  She’d need to tell Yan that she should be so proud of her child for what he had done this afternoon.  Tao pulled away from the embrace as he wiped at his teary eyes with the back of his hand.  “Oh…uh…my dad passed away when I was twelve. Heart attack..” Tao explained.   “It happened so sudden, with no warning. I didn’t know CPR then. Neither did my mum, really.”  Tao sniffed. Charlie listened on intensely. He’d never heard Tao speak so openly about his father’s death before. “We decided we were going to take a first aid course.” He admitted.  “I…let my dad down so much…I never wanted to be in that situation again. Not knowing what to do…”  Sarah felt the air being suspended in her throat as she blinked back tears. She quickly reached out for Tao, pulling him in for another hug.  “No..No, darling..” She said soothingly as she assured him as she rocked him back and forth like she did her own sons when they were upset. She could feel Tao practically shuddering under her touch as he let out a choked sob.   “You didn’t let him down.” She whispered as she rubbed his upper arm comfortingly.  “I didn’t know your dad but I can assure you that you would have made him so proud for what you done for my Nicky today..” she said blinking back tears.  “The doctor told me that if you hadn’t administered CPR when you did. Nick would have died before the paramedics reached the park..” her voice wavered as she had said that out loud. Her body feeling just as numb as it did when the doctor had told her the same thing a while ago.

“How is he?”  Tara asked quietly, glancing between Sarah and Charlie.  “Is he okay?”  Sarah wiped her tears away with the back of her hand.   “They’ve taken him for some scans and an xray of his ribs.” Sarah explained.  Tao’s eyes widened. “Did I hurt him?” He asked, his voice thick with panic. Had he been too rough with the chest impressions?   “Tao…” Elle said dumfoubdly. “You saved his life.” She couldn’t believe that her boyfriend was struggling to realise just how vital his heroic actions had been.  “That thing in his neck…” Darcy said speaking for the first time.   “The tube…” she said, grimacing as the thought alone sent shivers down her spine.  “Will he have it for long?”   Sarah sighed. She didn’t know much about the after effects this life saving procedure would have on her son. She just knew that it had been a life or death decision that had to be made.   “I don’t know, as far as I know Nick’s airway is still pretty swollen and they won’t remove it until the swelling goes down.”    “He’s not in pain is he??” Tara asked shakily, the thought that her friend was feeling any sort of pain or discomfort upset her deeply.   “They’ve got him sedated, sweetheart..” Sarah reassured her as she reached out to squeeze her hand.  “He won’t feel a thing.”  She hoped that was true. She couldn’t bear the thought of her baby hurting.  “I can’t believe this all happened because of a little bee..” Imogen said tearily. That little comment hit home for Sarah. Nick had been innocently enjoying a picnic in the park with his friends one minute and then fighting for his life the next all because he was stung by a bee.   “I never knew he was allergic to bees…” Elle said softly.   “Neither did I.” Sarah sighed as she slid down into one of the chairs, putting her head in her hands. Wasn’t this the kind of stuff that a mother was supposed to know? This wasn’t just a tiny thing. Her son had a life threatening allergy that she never knew about it.   “Nicks never been stung before now..” She sighed.    “It’s not your fault, you wouldn’t know unless he got stung.” Elle replied as she sat next to Sarah.   “A mother should know these kind of things.”     “You couldn’t have known that.” Elle reassured her.

Just then the silence in the room was interrupted by the door swinging open and a perturbed looked David Nelson entering. Sarah stood up immediately and grabbed her eldest son in a tight embrace. “Oh David thank god you’re here.” She was so thankful that her eldest son had only been in town with mates as he was up visiting from uni this weekend.   “What happened? You said Nick’s in a bad way?”  David asked, his eyes darting around the room. Who were all these people? He only recognised Charlie, he just assumed the others were friends of his little brother.   He wasn’t expecting the 2 voicemails that he had from his mum when he stepped outside the pub to have a smoke to be her hysterically telling him that he had to get to the hospital, that something had happened to Nick. He had just assumed she was calling to ask him to bring home milk or something.    “He got stung by a bee…”   David responded with a scoff as he threw his arms up in the air dramatically. “A bee sting really?” He exclaimed.  “This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard..” he continued.  “Mum, you’ve seriously taken the whole molly coddling Nick thing way too far…”  “David! Stop!” Sarah said firmly, forcing her eldest son to stop talking.  “It turns out your brother is severely allergic to bee stings.” She explained, calmly trying to engage her son in the severity of the situation.   David stared at his mum, a look of confusion plastered over his face.  “So what? Has he had an allergic reaction?”   David asked.  Sarah nodded.  “Yeah…Nick went into anaphylactic shock, sweetheart.” Sarah said slowly.  “He stopped breathing…”  David’s eyes flew open in shock. His little brother stopped breathing?  “But he’s okay, right??” David asked desperately.    “His friend performed CPR as they waited for the ambulance..” Sarah said as she reached out for Taos hand giving it a gentle squeeze.    “The paramedics had to perform an emergency tracheostomy…”. David’s face fell. That sounded serious.  “What does that mean?” He asked.  Sarah sighed. Explaining all the gory details will  make the reality of what has happened even more unbearable.    “Nicky’s airwave closed after he was stung…it caused a lot of swelling which made it difficult for him to breath so…uh…the paramedics had to make an incision around about here…” she spoke as she placed her finger on the lower part of the front of her neck.   “They cut through the thyroid gland so that they could make a stoma in his windpipe, allowing them to place a tube.”  She explained using the same expressions as the doctor used earlier. She watched as the colour drained from David’s face. “Oh my god…” he muttered. Sarah reached out and gripped her son’s hand, squeezing it tightly.    “He’s breathing again.” She said watching as David let out a breath of relief.  “But his throat is still very swollen so he will need the Tracheotomy tube for a while.”   David nodded. Struggling to process what had happened.   “Will it hurt him?” David asked softly.  Charlie watched on, he’d never heard or seen David show genuine concern for Nick in all the time that he had known him.    “He’s sedated, darling.” Sarah replied.  “He won’t be in any pain. They’ve just taken him for an X-ray and some tests.  They think he might have some broken ribs from the chest compressions.”  David just nodded as he turned to Tao.  “Thanks, mate!” He said softly.  “Um…” Tao flustered, awkwardly.  “It's okay.".     "You literally saved my brothers life so thanks." David repeated sincerely.

It was another 30 minutes until the door to the room opened and the doctor who had been treated Nick stepped inside. Sarah stood up immediately.  “How is he?” She asked. She was just desperate to see her baby, to sit with him, hold his hand and tell him everything was going to be alright.  The doctor glanced at all of the people inside the room. Nick must be one popular kid.   “Maybe we should step outside?” He suggested.  Sarah shook her head. She felt her stomach knot.  What wasn’t he telling her.   “Whatever it is you can tell me here..” she said sharply.  She just wanted to know what condition her son was in.    “The X-ray has shown that Nick has 3 cracked ribs.” Sarah put her hand to her mouth.  “Fortuantely there weren’t any abnormalities identified on his brain scan, but we won’t know for sure until he wakes up.” He continued to explain.  “I’m mostly concerned about the swelling around the throat and airway. Nick’s lungs are working double time, breathing for him is still incredibly difficult right now, so we have made the decision to place him on a ventilator, to do the breathing for him whilst giving his body a break. We have inserted the breathing tube into the trachea valve in your son’s neck.”  Sarah felt tears spring to her eyes. This was all so scary.   “We are just settling Nicholas into the Intensive Care Unit-“   “Is my son going to die??” Sarah asked suddenly.  “Nick is critically ill right now, yes, but I can see how much of a fighter your son is.”    Sarah had to hold on to that. It was all she could do right now, just hope and pray that her baby would pull through. It baffled her that her sons probably had this allergy his whole life and she didn’t know until now.    “Can I see him?”

The doctor nodded, he then glanced around the room.   “It’s family only in the ICU..”. Sarah nodded.   “We just wanted to see how Nick was, we will get off now.” Tara said standing up.  “You will keep us updated, though?”  Sarah nodded as she gave her a hug.  “Of course, darling.” She then gave them all a hug, one by one. So so thankful that her son had such a caring, genuine group of friends. Sarah watched them leave.  David stood up, ready to follow. Charlie stood up.   “Immediate family, right doc?” David asked with a smug smile on his face. Charlie sunk back in to his chair. David couldn’t resist the urge to be a complete and utter prick. Not even with his brother fighting for his life.  The doctor glanced at David.  “Oh, well yes…” he said. He just assumed that Charlie was family.   “Charlie is family.” Sarah said throughly as she extended her hand out to the younger boy in which he accepted. He smiled warmly at her as he allowed her to pull him on to his feet, watching as the smug smile was wiped straight off of David’s face as they followed the doctor out of the room, towards the ICU.

Charlie, Sarah and David followed the doctor down endless corridors and up in the lift to the ICU. He led them to a room and gestured for them to use the hand sanitiser before entering. “So we have Nicholas sedated whilst on the ventilator. He is attached to various monitoring wires and has 2 IVs in his arms. Please don’t be alarmed, it’s all so we can keep a close eye on him and give him fluids and medicine.” Sarah nodded seriously and squeezed Charlie’s hand. David looked pale, this was so much more serious than he had been expecting, “can he hear us?” She asked. The doctor smiled at her sympathetically. “We don’t know for sure but I like to tell families that it can’t hurt to talk to him, just in case.” The doctor then opened the door and led them inside.
Charlie took a sharp intake of breath as he looked at Nick. Sarah let out a loud sob. The small tube that was sticking out of his throat had been replaced with a thicker one, attached to a large ventilator tube which snaked down the side of the bed and into the machine. It was making a noise with each breath, the air forcing Nicks chest to rise and fall rhythmically. His face was still slightly swollen and red. He had been changed into a hospital gown and a thin blanket had been placed over his legs. He was so still. Sarah immediately walked up to him and carefully picked up his hand. She stroked his cheek. “I’m here baby, mums here,” she soothed. Tears were streaming down her face. She couldn’t believe the events of the afternoon. He’d left the house so excited for the picnic and then the celebrations in the evening. Never in her worst nightmares could she have imagined the phone call she received from Charlie a little while ago. She’d had no idea he had such a serious allergy. It all seemed like a nightmare. “You’re going to be ok my darling, just rest. Charlie’s here too and your brother.” Charlie stood on the other side of the bed, taking Nicks other hand, being careful not to knock his IV. “I’m here babe,” he whispered. He pulled up the chair so he could sit as closely as possible to Nicks bed. He glanced over at all the machines beeping and blinking and whirring away. He couldn’t get his head around the fact that Nick was on a ventilator in a coma, all because he was stung by a bee. It seemed completely crazy. He could die. The doctor had said he was in a critical condition.
David hadn’t moved from the doorway. He was frozen in place at the sight of his brother. His initial annoyance that Charlie was allowed to come into the room with them had been replaced by a crippling sense of shock. The ventilator tube made him feel physically sick. He watched as Sarah and Charlie both held Nick’s hand as they spoke to him. He felt like there wasn’t enough air in the room. He needed to get out, he couldn’t stand to see his baby brother so critically ill. “Um, I need some air,” he stuttered out as he turned towards the exit. He could hear his mum calling after him but he just started walking faster and faster. He didn’t feel like he could get a full breath until he was back outside in the sunshine away from that terrible room.

Sarah sighed as David bolted from the room, before turning her attention back to Nick. Charlie was completely shocked by his reaction. It almost looked like he’d cared about Nick. He decided not to voice his opinion, Sarah had enough to worry about with Nick. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket so fished it out and looked at the Lock Screen. It was from his mum, asking if he was coming home before going to Sahars or going straight there. Shit, he hadn’t told his mum what had happened. He closed his eyes and took a breath. “ you ok Charlie?” Sarah looked at him with concern. “Yeah,” he nodded, i just need to tell my mum what has happened. I don’t know how to begin.” He looked at her helplessly. Sarah gave him a reassuring smile, “would you like me to phone her for you?” She asked kindly. “You can sit with Nick for a bit before she comes to pick you up.” Charlie nodded gratefully at her although he didn’t want to go home, he wanted to stay here with Nick. But he knew that he wouldn’t be allowed to stay all night.
Sarah stepped out of the room to phone Jane, while Charlie sat by Nick, whispering over and over again how much he loved him and how he needed to get better, to fight. Throughout it all Nick slept on, under the heavy sedation.
Around an hour later, Jane arrived to pick him up. She hugged him fiercely, and then hugged Sarah too, “I’m so sorry Sarah, how is he doing?” She glanced through the window at Nick, shocked by the sight of the ventilator. “He’s really poorly,”Sarah admitted. “They have him sedated and on a ventilator while they wait for the swelling in his throat to go down.” Her voice cracked, “ we just have to wait.” Jane couldn’t believe what she was hearing, it must have been such a shock for Charlie to see Nick like that. He always seemed so strong, so unstoppable. The fact that a tiny bee had caused all of this was just unbelievable. “Do I have to go home?” Charlie looked at her pleadingly. “I’m sorry Charlie, but you do. Visiting hours are over and only one person can stay with him overnight.”
Charlie admitted defeat and lent over Nick to kiss his swollen cheek. “I’ll see you in the morning babe, I love you so much,” he whispered. He gently squeezed his hand and then walked out of the room to where his mum was waiting. “You promise to call me if anything changes?” He asked Sarah. “Of course darling, I promise.” She hugged him tightly. “ thank you for looking after him before I got here,” her eyes were shining with tears as she spoke. Charlie was too choked up to reply so he just nodded, before leaving with his mum.
On the way to the car, he spotted David, sitting alone on a bench near the hospital. “Just a second mum,” he said as he gestured towards David. Jane nodded and headed to wait for him in the car.
“He approached David cautiously. He was sat with his head in his hands, his posture totally defeated. “ David?” David’s head lifted at the sound of his name. “ can I sit here?” Charlie asked. David gave a small nod, brushing the tears from his cheeks roughly. “Are you ok? It must have been a shock to see him like that,” Charlie searched his face for a response.
David sighed loudly. His usual response to anything Charlie said was to make a mean, unkind comment. But Charlie had helped to save Nicks life. He was the one who called the ambulance. He was so fed up of living up to his reputation of being a total dickhead.
“Yeah I’m ok,” he replied, “just in shock I think. I thought mum was just overreacting when I spoke to her on the phone…..I had no idea it would be so bad.” He shuddered at the vision on Nick on the ventilator.
“It happened so fast,” Charlie fiddled with the sleeves on his jumper, “one minute he was fine and then the next…..he couldn’t breathe. It was the most terrifying thing I have ever seen.” David looked at him with sympathy. It must have been horrendous for his friends. “But now, Nick needs us to be strong for him, and your mum needs you to step up David.” David tutted at that, “don’t tell me what my mum needs.” He replied angrily. “Shes my mum.”
Charlie ignored the anger in his voice, “ so prove that you aren’t the mean prick you usually are with Nick. Go back in there and be there for your mum, and Nick. Whatever they need.” He looked determinedly at David, who after a pause nodded softly. “I will,” he said quietly, whatever they need. “Thanks Charlie.”
For a horrible moment Charlie thought David was going to hug him, but he obviously thought better of it and get him a small nod, standing up and heading back through the entrance. Charlie headed for his mums car, sitting in the passenger seat with a sigh.
“What was that all about?” Jane asked. Charlie just shook his head, “nothing.” He replied. Jane started the car and headed home. “Are you still going to Sahar’s later?” She glanced over to him. Charlie didn’t know. He wasn’t in the mood for socialising with his friends but he knew it might take his mind off Nick for a little bit. “I’m not sure,” he replied, “can I wait and see how I feel later?” Jane too, one hand off the steering wheel and squeezed his knee. “ of course it’s ok. Let’s go home.”

Sarah refused to leave her son’s side, except for going to the toilet. She’d never forgive herself if she left and something happened. She was going to be here, holding her baby’s hand until he felt strong enough to open his eyes.    “My strong, brave, boy…” she soothed as she gripped on to his hand, gently stroking his arm, being careful not to knock the IV.  Her eyes darted around at all the medical equipment.  The wires and monitors and machines.  The trache tube in her son’s throat. The ventilator.  Nick was stung by a bee. She just couldn’t believe this was now the reality of the outcome.  She knew she was now going to become one of those mothers who makes their child carry an Epi-pen everywhere they go but this just wasn’t worth the risk.  Would Nick be left with a scar? From the tracheostomy? Probably. What if there was lasting brain damage from being starved of oxygen for so long?   She let out a shaky breath.  She really needed to stop thinking of the negatives and focus on getting Nicky better.  She squeezed his hand again.  “Your brother was here…”  that sent her brain in to overdrive again. Where had David disappeared to? He didn’t stay very long but thinking of the look on his face when he first saw the state of Nick. He looked traumatised.  Had he gone home? He was evidently upset. She wanted to run after him but she couldn’t leave Nick alone. She’d sent him a message and he’d read it but hadn’t responded.  Sarah heard the door clicking open and then shut behind her and just assumed that it was one of the nurses in to check on Nick. They were monitoring him very closely.

“I got you a coffee…” she wasn’t expecting to hear her eldest son’s voice.  She turned around. David was holding two cups of coffee from the hospital canteen.  “Oh thank you, darling.” Sarah smiled softly as she accepted one of the cups.  “I thought you’d gone home…”.    David sat the backpack that was carrying on the floor and sat down on the seat on the opposite of his brother’s hospital bed.  “I did…” he replied.  Sarah glanced over at him and then noticed the rucksack on the floor. “I went home and let Nellie out and grabbed some bits.” he told her.  “Nick’s obviously going to be here a while…” he said as he opened up the zip on the backpack.  “There’s some pjs for him, i figured he’d prefer those to that.” He said, gesturing to the white and blue hospital gown that his brother was wearing.  “There’s also a change of clothes for you and that book you’ve been reading…” he added, catching the surprised look on his mother’s face.  “I’m assuming you’re not planning on leaving Nicky anytime soon…”  Sarah nodded and smiled at her son.  “Thank you, sweetheart.” She paused for a moment.  “Are you alright?”     David sighed as he took a large gulp of his double shot coffee.   “I…I just needed to get out, get some air…”.   Sarah studied her eldest son’s face.   “It was a shock seeing him like this, wasn’t it?”  She asked, hesitantly. David swallowed a lump in his throat and then nervously chewed on his life, he nodded, finally forcing himself to look at his brother, taking in the angry, red rash that remained on his face and arms. The two IV drips, one in his left forearm, the other on the back of his right hand. there was a feeding tube in his left nostril, wires and tubes connected to almost every visible part of his body, even snaking their way under the awful cheap hospital cotton gown, but the most terrifying thing was the tube poking out of his brothers neck and the ventilator tube that was connected to it as it snaked his way around the bed and in to the machine which was doing the job of breathing for Nick right now, in order to give his body a rest.    “Yeah…” David breathed out, feeling himself well up again. He refused to cry in front of his mother as he tried his hardest to compose himself. He refused to cry in front of Nick, although there was a chance his little brother couldn’t hear him, there was also a chance that he could and David wasn’t about to give Nick the satisfaction of witnessing him at his most vulnerable.

Charlie shuffled in to the hallway. His mum had somehow convinced him that going to Sahar’s was a good idea after all. She had offered to drop him off after swinging by home and picking up his things. Nick and Charlie hadn’t originally planned on going to the sleepover but after the traumatic events of today, Jane had told Charlie that it would probably do him good to be surrounded by his friends. She promised that she would let him know if she heard from Sarah. Charlie had taken some persuasion but then finally agreed that he wanted to be with his friends. He couldn’t be with Nick, so they were the next best thing. They had all been through a traumatic ordeal this afternoon and would be able to provide each other with comfort.

Charlie climbed the stairs to his bedroom and opened the door. Letting out a shaky breath, the reality of what had happened today finally catching up on him. Nick had stopped breathing right in front of him. He knew the moment that Nick had been stung that something wasn’t right, he had just kind of disassociated from the group. It was the moment that he saw the absolute panic in his boyfriend’s eyes that he knew that something was really wrong. Nick was clutching his throat and gasping for air. He was struggling to breathe and then everything had just happened so quickly.  Nick collapsing, his body covered in angry looking hives from head to toe. Tao racing in to action and giving Nick CPR as they waited for the ambulance. It had all been so scary.   Charlie grabbed his overnight bag from on top of his wardrobe.   “Charlie?”

He spun around to see Tori hovering in the doorway, concern plastered on her face. She could tell that her brother was struggling to keep his emotions in check as she closed the door behind her and walked over to Charlie’s bed.   “What happened?” She asked softly.  “All mum said before she rushed out earlier was that Nick was in hospital after having an allergic reaction…” she said softly.  “I…I didn’t know Nick had allergies…is he okay?”  Tori asked as she perched herself down on the edge of her brother’s bed.  “Neither did any of us…” Charlie sighed as he put his Pj’s and clothes for tomorrow in to his overnight bag and flopped down on to his bed.   “He was stung..” he explained.  “By a bee?” Tori asked.  Charlie nodded.  “It turns out he’s extremely allergic to bee stings…it…it was horrible..” Charlie said as his voice began to wobble.  “He just stopped breathing, Tor…”.  Tori’s eyes widened in horror.  “His whole body just went limp and he collapsed on to the picnic blanket…” Charlie blinked as a tear rolled down his cheek.  “Tao! Tao was amazing…he knew exactly what to do! The rest of us, we just stood there…I just stood there…” he whispered.  “While Nick was literally dying. I just stood there.”  Tori pulled herself in to a sitting position as she grabbed her brother’s arm and forced him to look at her. This was just typical of Charlie to do this. To blame himself.   “Charlie…you were in shock.” She said softly.  “Your boyfriend literally went in to anaphylactic shock in front of you…”   “Tao saved his life…” Charlie said.  Tori couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She would need to thank Tao the next time that she saw him.  “They had to perform an emergency tracheotomy at the scene…” Charlie told her, watching as the all of the colour drained from his sisters natural pale  face.  “What?” Tori asked.   “It was the only way to get him breathing again. His airway had swollen shut. It was horrible..” Charlie cried.  “It was like something out of a medical drama.”     “Is he okay now?” Tori asked, noticing that her little brother was yet to update her on Nick’s current condition.   “He’s in intensive care.” Charlie sighed.  “I was allowed to sit with him for a bit but he’s heavily sedated.  His throat is still swollen so they will need to keep the trache in place for a few days. They’ve got him on a ventilator to assist his breathing.”   Tori couldn’t believe what she was hearing.  Poor Nick. Poor Sarah.   She watched as Charlie returned to packing his bag.  “Where are you going?”   “Sahar’s having a sleepover…”.  Tori nodded. Charlie definitely needed a distraction. She reached out and pulled him in for a hug.  “Try and not worry too much much, yeah?  Nick is in the best place right now…”.   Charlie just nodded as he placed the last of his belongings in the bag. He could always depend on his older sister and her older sister magic to make him feel better.

“Charlie? Are you ready to go?”  He heard his mum call up the stairs.  “Yeah! Just coming.” He replied as he slung his bag over his shoulder and raced down the stairs. Soon he would be in the comfort of his friends. He’d much rather be with Nick, holding his hand but that just wasn’t possible right now.   

Chapter Text

David left Sarah and Nick after being scolded by the nurse for being there after visiting hours. He wouldn’t admit it to his mum but he was glad to be going home. He found it so hard to be in that small windowless room watching his little brother fight for his life. Sarah was allowed to stay overnight as Nick was still technically a minor. She had been given a blanket and pillow and shown how to turn her chair into a recliner. She’d thanked them but she had no intention of actually going to sleep at any point. She was going to be by her baby’s side all night in case anything happened and he needed her. She grasped his hand tightly, whispering words of comfort and affirmation to him all night. Only leaving the room briefly to use the bathroom or grab a weak, disgusting coffee from the vending machine down the hall. Every now and then her eyes would begin to close and she’d jolt back awake. Nick remained the same all night, the ventilator tube breathing for him. Nurses and doctors came in hourly to perform checks, reassuring Sarah that he was still critical but stable.

Charlie arrived at Sahars house just before 8pm. He rang the doorbell and took a deep breath. It flung open and he was instantly enveloped in a group hug. “Charlie,” Elle cried as she squeezed him tight. “Are you ok?” Charlie let himself be comforted, before pulling out of the hug. He took his shoes off and followed the others into the lounge which had been turned into a sleeping space for the night. Pillows, cushions, duvets, sleeping bags all covered the floor. Charlie dumped his bag in the corner and sank onto one of the cushions. “I’m ok,” he eventually replied. “I think I’m still in shock a bit to be honest.” Everyone murmured their understanding. “How’s Nick doing?” Tara asked. Charlie filled them in on the events since they left. “It was so scary seeing him ventilated like that. He looked so poorly and vulnerable.” Charlie could feel himself welling up, “ Sarah promised to phone if there were any changes and mum thought I could use a distraction as I’m not allowed to visit again until tomorrow late morning.” The gang sat in silence, all trying hard to hold it together. Nick was so loved by everyone, they hated to imagine him lying there so helpless.
“Ok, so let’s do that,” Sahar broke the silence. “Pizza time! What does everyone want?” The next few moments were spent arguing over pizza toppings and placing their order. Sahar got to choose the first movie and they all found comfy spots to sit and watch while they waited for the pizza. Tao came to sit by Charlie, offering his arm out for a hug. Charlie took it gratefully and sank into Tao’s shoulder. He watched the movie through his tears. A notification on his phone startled him and he checked it quickly. Everyone’s eyes were on him. “Sarah says he’s still the same, she hopes we have a fun time and she’ll message me in the morning.” He breathed out a breath he hadn’t realised he was holding.

Nobody at the sleepover got much sleep that night. They chatted late into the night, often going back to the events of the afternoon and trying to make sense of them. Charlie drifted off into a restless sleep at around 4 but was awake again by 6. He was dressed and waiting for a text from Sarah long before the others began to stir. She finally messaged him just before 7 to say that Nick was still stable and had a peaceful night. Charlie filled the rest of the group in before making his way home, leaving them to have pancakes. He just wanted to get to Nick, even if he had to wait in the waiting room for official visiting hours.

Sarah rubbed the sleep from her eyes. She was exhausted. The doctor had just been in to check on her Nicky. His throat was still far too swollen to attempt to remove the ventilator. He said it would probably be another day. He was confident things were going in the right direction, but it was slower than he had hoped. She was jolted out of her thoughts by the door to his room opening. “Sarah?” She whipped her head round at the familiar voice. Shocked to hear it.
“Stephane,” she stood up and hugged him. He looked terrible, he’d obviously been travelling overnight to get to them so quickly. He looked as tired as she felt. He stepped into the room and took a look at Nick. His face visibly paled as he took in the state of Nick and all the various medical equipment keeping him alive. “I came as quickly as I could,” he said shakily. “Have the doctors said anything?”
Sarah returned to her seat and picked up Nicks hand. She gestured to the empty seat on the other side of the bed and Stephane sat down. He hesitated, before,gently patting Nicks arm. “His throat is too swollen to remove the ventilator,”Sarah sighed. “they said he’s stable but still in a critical condition. We just have to give him time,” she brushed Nicks hair out of his face. “Your dad is here baby, he’s come to see you.”
She looked across at Stephane. “Talk to him,” she hissed. Stephane cleared his throat awkwardly. “Um, Nicholas, it’s your papa here,” he looked at Sarah for reassurance, “um, I hope you feel better soon.” He sat back in his chair. Sarah raised her eyebrows at him, “I am sorry,” he said, “I don’t know what to say.” Sarah leaned over to kiss Nick on the forehead, “just tell him how much you love him,tell him to keep fighting, tell him anything Stephane, just talk to him.”
With a little encouragement, Stephane did his best to talk to Nick. He told him about his journey on the euro star and that he had hired a car to drive to Kent he explained he had to go back home again later that day to be in Paris for an important business meeting. Sarah, who had been texting Diane and only half listening to him, raised her head sharply. “What?” She hissed, “ you are leaving today? You’ve only just got here!” Stephane had the sense to look guilty. “I am sorry Sarah, but I simply cannot miss this meeting, it’s been arranged for months. I will come back again in a few days to see him.”
Sarah bit her tongue. She refused to argue with him in front of Nicky, he could well be able to hear everything they were talking about. He needed peace and calm. “It’s typical of you, minimum effort.” She snapped. “Sit with him for a bit while I make some phone calls.” She got up without giving him time to reply and slammed the door closed behind her.

“Sarah?” Diane picked up on the first ring, “is everything ok? How is Nick? Any changes?” Sarah slumped onto the little row of chairs in the corridor. “No change,” she sighed. “But um, Stephane has arrived.”
“Oh my god, has he actually shown up?” Diane was not a fan of her older sisters ex husband. She’d never forgive him for being such a shitty husband and absent father.
Sarah leaned her head back against the wall. “He just arrived. But apparently he can only stay until this afternoon as he has to be back in Paris for a meeting.” Her voice had a sharp tone to it. She heard Diane’s sarcastic laugh at the other end of the phone. “Of course he has,” she snapped. “I hope you aren’t surprised that he’s bailing on you already.”
“No, I’m not,” she eventually replied, “I guess I just hoped he’d step up with his son in intensive care. But I was foolish to expect that.”
Diane’s voice was softer this time, “you aren’t foolish to hope that he would stick around. But we can manage without him. I can be over later this afternoon to keep you company?”
Sarah smiled, she may have had awful taste in husbands but she had really lucked out with sisters. “That would be great, I’ll message you when he’s gone. Charlie will be over soon I’m sure, and David too. He’s been great actually,” she said. Diane was shocked, “he has?” “Yeah he’s brought me and Nick things we might need and he’s looking after Nellie for me while I’m here. He was really shaken up by it all.” Diane was impressed, David had always been harder to get to know than Nick who wore his heart on his sleeve. She’d always been worried he was going to take after his father. The fact he was stepping up now warmed her heart.

Sarah said her goodbyes to her sister and ended the call. She took a deep breath to compose herself before re-entering the room.  Stéphane remained at Nick’s bedside, speaking false promises and words of lies as he rubbed his son’s arm. It made the anger bubble up inside of Sarah. He couldn’t even be bothered to stick around until Nick pulled through this, if he pulled through this. She sighed heavily. She really had to stop thinking negatively, it wasn’t helping anyone, least of all, Nicky.    “When you’re feeling better. You’ll need to come to Paris. Martine can’t wait to meet you..”     Sarah had to refrain herself from scoffing.  Stéphane had been with his new partner for at least a couple of years and he was yet to introduce her to his sons. Stéphane must be deluded if he thinks I’m going to allow Nicky to go to Paris on his own. I’m never going to let him out my sight again. Sarah thought to herself as she returned to her seat on the opposite of the bed, she picked Nick’s hand up again, being careful of the IV.  “I’m back, sweetheart.” She spoke softly as she reached out and stroked his cheek. her heart broke for her little boy. He was so poorly and then she would have to be the one to explain that his dad had visited but was too wrapped up in work to actually stick around. It made her furious and she was finding it very hard not to bite back, but it wasn’t fair on Nicky. If he could hear what was going around. She didn’t want him to hear anything negative

“You haven’t told me what happened.” Stéphane glanced at his ex wife. Sarah peeled her eyes away from son as she looked over at the man who had once swept her of her feet and was now nothing but a distant memory and the father of her children.    “He went in to anaphylactic shock after being stung by a bee..”. Sarah said as she continued to stroke Nick’s hand.  Stéphane lifted his gaze.  “I didn’t know Nicholas is allergic to bee’s?”  He said. Sarah glanced over at him. Normally her reply would be something sarcastic along the lines of ‘well if you even cared to see your children more than two times a year then you would know these thing’s’ but in this circumstance. It was different. She hadn’t known either.    “Neither did we.” She replied, simply.   “He stopped breathing. His friend had to resuscitate him.”  She explained. Maybe Stéphane learning the horrific details of yesterday’s events would make him want to stay, just maybe. For Nicky’s sake.   She could have sworn she saw a flash of horror in her ex husband’s eyes.   “The tube…it’s helping him breathe?” He asked.  Sarah nodded softly.  “The paramedics had to perform a tracheostomy at the scene to get him breathing again as his throat had closed. The ventilator is assisting him until he is stable enough for them to remove it.”   “He will be scarred, yes?”  Stéphane asked.  Sarah sighed, she hadn’t even spared that a thought. That was a bridge they would have to cross later on. Her priority right now was ensuring her son survived the next 24 hours.  “Potentially..” she replied.

Just then the door walked in. Lucy, the nurse who had been overseeing Nick’s care entered.  “Morning Sarah.” She smiled, warmly, her eyes fell on Stéphane. “Ah, you must be dad…” she smiled as she lifted Nick’s chart, took a glance and put it back on to the holder at the foot at the bed.  “Yes, Stéphane.” He replied as he held out his hand, which Lucy shook with a welcoming look.  She then turned her attention to her patient.  “Good morning, handsome.” She smiled as she did the usual checks, ensuring the ventilator tube was still fitted properly. She did some checks on the machines before fitting some gloves on to her hands. Firstly she did a quick suction around the tube to remove any build up of saliva and bacteria. Sarah continued to hold her son’s hands like she had done during all the checkups and observations through out the night. The nurse injected another small dose of antihistamine in to Nick’s IV. The redness and blotchiness of his skin was still present but not as angry looking as it had been before. She then attached a bag of brown liquid to the nasal gastric tube that was thread through Nick’s nose and down in to his stomach. It was posing the purpose of administering much needed nutrients. “Some breakfast for you, sweet pea.” She smiled softly as she tossed her gloves into the bin before performing the normal observations. Blood pressure and temperature etc.   “Would you both like a cup of tea?” She asked both his parents. Sarah smiled. Lucy had been an absolute life saver the last 10 hours or so.  “I’d love one.”  She then glanced over at her ex-husband who was glancing at his wrist watch.  Oh I wouldn’t want to keep you from your important business.  She thought to herself, sarcastically.   “Yes, that would be nice, thank you.”  Stéphane surprised her by answering the nurse. Had he had a change of heart? Maybe he wasn’t going to rush off after all. She wasn’t going to get her hopes up. Stéphane had this way of always letting her down, no matter what. That was one of the main reasons that she divorced him. Lucy smiled at them both and left the room to go and get their drinks.

Sarah hesitated for a moment. “What time is your flight?” She asked, curtly.  Stéphane glanced up from his phone, from whatever was more important than talking to his poorly son, on life support.  “Half three.” Stéphane replied, flatly. Not confirming that he was definitely going back to Paris. Sarah decided not to push it. Stéphane had clearly already made his mind up. She would just have to sit here and bite her tongue.  “Where’s David?” Stéphane asked after a while, breaking the icy, awkward silence in the room.  Sarah glanced up.  “He’s at home. He’ll probably be here soon. They wouldn’t let him stay overnight.” She explained.  “I think he was glad to go home to be honest. It shocked him seeing Nicky like this…” she ran her thumb up and down her son’s arm. “It’s shocked us all, baby.” She said softly.   “We just need you to her better.”      “He can’t hear you..” Stéphane replied in a condescending tone.  “He might be able to..” Sarah replied, with a scoff.  This was just Stéphane all over again.  The doctor had told her that there was no way of knowing what Nicky could and couldn’t hear, but it was providing her with some sort of comfort believing that Nick could hear her so she was going to hold on to that, so Stéphane could go take a flying fuck back to France for all she cared.   A knock on the door caused Sarah to look up, she smiled as Lucy placed the cups of tea on the table.  “I’ll be back in to check on Nick in an hour.” She’d be taking the last observation before her twelve hour shift comes to an end.  Sarah smiled and her gratefully as she left.

The next three quarters of an hour were silent and awkward apart from Stéphane answering a work call much to sarah’s annoyance. She wasn’t even thinking about her own work and she wouldn’t be until Nick was back up on his feet and at home where he should be.  Stéphane would be as well as not even being here as he had barely uttered a word to his son.  Sarah just tried to ignore the elephant in the room. She would continue to talk to Nick, she would continue to provide herself with the same amount of comfort that she hoped she was proving him with. It was a little after 10am when there was a soft knocking at the door.  “Come in.” Sarah replied.  She felt so relieved in seeing her little sister’s head pop around the door.  “Oh Di..” Sarah said quickly as she stood up and literally fell in to her sisters outstretched arms. Feeling instant comfort.  “Thank you for coming.”   Diane held her sister tightly..”   “I’m surprised they let you in. Normal visiting hours aren’t until 11am.” Sarah said, but ever so glad they had and her sister was here. She needed that hug, so, so much.   “Rich didn’t give them much choice.” Diane said softly.   “Rich is here?” Sarah asked, her eyes darting to the doorway for signs of her brother in law.   “He’s gone to get you a proper coffee from the Costa downstairs.” Diane smiled.  “You look like you need one…”  Sarah smiled softly.  “I do. The coffee from the machines is just about bearable.”   Diane laughed. “Oh yes. I remember it well from when I was in having the twins…”   “Where are the kids?” Sarah asked, hospitals were no place for her 7 year old niece and nephew.   “We dropped them at Rich’s parents this morning. I just wanted to get here as quickly as I could..” Diane said as her eyes finally fell on her nephew. She let out a gasp at that she saw.  “Oh my god…” she whispered.

She felt her eyes tear up at the sight of her nephew. He looked so poorly, so vulnerable. The tube poking out of his neck, connected to the ventilator was a frightening sight. The hissing sound from the machine sent shivers down her spine.  “Oh Nicky…” she said softly.  “He’s heavily sedated.” Sarah explained. “I just can’t believe we never knew he was allergic to bees.” Diane sighed.  She would definitely be making of a point of getting her twins allergy tested.  Nobody had imagine this happening ever in their wildest dreams.   Diane glanced at the opposite side of the bed where her ex brother in law was sitting, scrolling through his phone, barely acknowledging her presence in the room. He had another thing coming if he thought he was going to just sit there and blatantly ignore her.  “Hello Stéphane…” she said, peering over her sisters shoulder and forcing him to lift his head and look at her.  “Ah Diane…” he greeted.  “It’s nice to see you.”  Diane had to refrain from snorting out loud. He was so utterly and completely  full of bullshit. She forced a smile on to her face and raised her eyebrows. She just couldn’t help herself.  “It’s nice to see you remember that you have kids…” she said in a sour tone, watching as his face fell.  “Diane…” Sarah said, shooting her little sister a look that said ‘not here’ even though there was 100% truth behind what she had said.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Stéphane retorted, obviously not liking being called out.  Diane just shrugged. “You know what…” she replied. She wasn’t going to waste another breath on him. She’d hold back her tongue only because her sister had asked her to and she didn’t want to cause any distress to her nephew, but as she was concerned. Stéphane had no place here.     “Coffee delivery…” Rich’s voice sounded as he entered the room carrying a tray of coffee’s. Sarah’s face lit up as she gave her brother in law a hug after he put the tray down.  “I got them to put an extra shot in yours.” Rich smiled as he pulled her in to a tight embrace.  He then glanced at Stéphane.  “So sorry, I didn’t know you were here..” he said in an apologetic tone.  “That’s alright. I was just getting off, actually.” Stéphane said as he stood up, fetching his coat from the back of the chair.   “Already?” Sarah asked bluntly.   “What hotel are you staying in? If you hang around for a bit I can drop you off?” Rich suggested.   “I’m heading to the airport…I have a flight in a couple of hours.” Stéphane replied.  Rich frowned “You’re going back to France, already?” He asked. His gaze shifting between him and Nick. How could any father just up and leave when their child was laying in a hospital bed in serious condition.  “I’m scheduled in for an important meeting.” Stéphane replied, as if what he was doing was completely normal.   He bent down. Placing a gentle kiss on his son’s forehead before whispering in French. I’ll be back to see you, soon. Nicholas. I love you.  Sarah knew what he was saying. She was never completely fluent in French but Stéphane had always insisted they speak French around the boys when they were younger so she did know a fair bit.  She held a breath, not believing a single word of what he was saying. She couldn’t believe he was just going to go back to France. He wasn’t going to even wait until Nick woke up.  “It was nice seeing you both.” Stéphane nodded in Diane and Rich’s direction before turning to Sarah.  “You will  keep me updated?”  Sarah said nothing except nod her head gently before sitting back down and taking Nick’s hand in hers again, placing a kiss on it. She had to blink back tears, tears of anger, tears of frustration and devastation that this had even happened. She just felt exhausted and overwhelmed.  Stéphane took one last glance at his son before turning towards the door and walking out of the room. Diane stood up quickly.  “I need more sugar.” She lied before rushing out of the room. Sarah watched her leave, she didn’t before her for a second, but she didn’t stop her either.  She could rip Stéphane to shreds until her heart was content.  Just not in front of Nicky.

Diane rushed down the corridor.  “Stéphane!!” She called, just as he was about to get into the lift. Stéphane turned to face her.  “Are you seriously just going to leave? You’re not even going to wait and see if your son wakes up?” She spat. Her anger bubbling over the surface. How Sarah had managed to keep her cool like that she will never know. She was absolutely fuming.  “This has nothing to do with you.” Stéphane responded, a hint of annoyance behind his voice.  Diane scoffed.  “It has plenty to do with me.” She replied.  “Do you really think I’m just going to stand by and allow you to hurt my nephew, again?  Like you have done repeatedly for years??” She asked him accusingly.  “Your child is fighting for his life down that corridor and you’re choosing a poxy work meeting?” She snapped. “It’s an important meeting.”   “More important than your son?” She asked.  “You know what? Don’t answer that…” Diane replied. She could feel the nurses from the station glancing over. She wasn’t about to start a scene that resulted in her being escorted from the building. Stéphane wasn’t worth that, not in the slightest. Besides, she had come here to visit Nick, not to argue with his deadbeat of a father.   “Just hear me out.” She said, adapting a softer tone.   “Do you want to lose your son for good?”   She asked him, seriously.  “He isn’t going to die…” Stéphane replied as if he had just graduated from medical school and became a trained professional.  “I didn’t mean that.” Diane replied.  “All I’m saying is if you leave now. You’re going to lose Nick. I know for a fact Sarah won’t continue making excuses for you and I definitely won’t be…”  Stéphane glanced at his watch. Which just infuriated Diane even more.  “Why can’t you see what a great kid you’ve got in there?” She snapped.  “Nick is the most caring, genuine, loving young man I’ve ever met and the fact that you’re choosing not to be involved in his life is just sad.” She said shaking her head.  “Just think about it..” she said. She wasn’t going to spend another second with him, she turned to leave when the lift door opened and she heard a familiar voice.  “Dad?”  She spun around to see David.  David glanced between his Dad and his Auntie Diane, wondering what was going on.   “When did you get here?” David asked his father.   “A few hours ago.” Stéphane replied as he gave his eldest son a hug.  “I have to go but I will be back in a few weeks.”

David frowned.  Weeks?? What was his dad talking about? Surely he wasn’t leaving?   “What? You can’t be leaving already, Nick hasn’t even woken up…” he asked confused.  Stéphane sighed.  “I have to catch a flight, David…”   “You’re going home?” David asked, his frown deepening. “While Nick is on a ventilator in the ICU?”  He couldn’t understand this.  “I have to go, this meeting is very important to me…”.  David’s eyes turned fiery.  “You’re leaving because of work?” He asked, outraged.   “I have to go, I’m sorry.” Stéphane said simply as he stepped into the lift, the doors closing swiftly behind him.  Diane wrapped her nephew in a hug.  “Some things never change.” She whispered. She’d become used to wiping her nephews tears over their father throughout the years.  “I can’t believe he’s just going to leave like that…” David mumbled.  “Come on, let’s go see your little brother.” Diane said holding her hand out.

Sarah, Diane, Rich and David sat beside Nick’s bedside for a while. The nurse popped in, did her checks and left them to it. Usually only 2 people were permitted in ICU rooms at one time but she decided to make an exception.  After a while David and Rich headed off to get some fresh coffees.  Diane reached in to her handbag. “You’ll probably think I’m nuts.” She said, glancing at her sister as she pulled out a brightly coloured book. Sarah couldn’t help the smile that crept on to her face as Diane gripped on to Nick’s favourite storybook as a child.  The very hungry caterpillar.   “He used to love me reading this to him.” Diane smiled fondly.  “Every time I put him to bed.”  Sarah smiled tearily.  “It’s Lexi’s favourite at the minute.” Diane explained. “I saw it in the lounge before we left and I just grabbed it. I don’t know it was a silly thought.” She said softly, shaking her head about to put it back in her bag when Sarah placed her hand on top of hers.  “Why don’t you read it to him now?” She suggested.  “I’m sure he would love that.” She smiled, gazing down at her son.  “Wouldn’t you darling?” She said as she brushed his hair away from his face.   Diane glanced at her nephew before nodding softly as she opened the book and began to read.  Sarah leaned back in her chair, listening as her sisters softly ready the story book out loud, feeling a soft buzz in her pocket, she pulled out her phone and her smiled widened. It was a text from Charlie, informing her that he had arrived downstairs and asking if it was alright for him to visit? He was such a sweet boy.

Charlie paced anxiously in the entrance of the hospital. He desperately wanted to see Nick but he knew it was family only. Would he be allowed back in? Sarah had said he was family but would that be enough? He had sent a text to her to let her know he was here, so he just had to wait. He was mindlessly reading the notice board in the corridor when he heard his name. He whirled round quickly, seeing Sarah coming towards him, arms outstretched.
He fell into her hug, feeling reassured. “Morning Sarah, how’s he doing?” He looked at her carefully, she looked exhausted. She had bags under her eyes and was still wearing the same clothes as yesterday. His heart broke for her, she looked so tired.
“He’s much the same sweetheart,”she replied, “ still ventilated and sedated. Would you like to come up and see him with me? David and Rich have popped for a coffee so it’s just me and Di at the moment. I’m sure they won’t mind you coming up.” Charlie nodded gratefully and followed her up to ICU. They were buzzed in by a friendly nurse and Sarah took him back to Nicks room. Charlie readied himself to see Nick again but he still felt the air leaving his lungs as he entered the room and saw his boyfriend comatose on the bed. Everything looked as it did yesterday. He hadn’t moved at all. His skin looked slightly less sore but other than that there was no change. His eyes welled with tears. “Hi Charlie darling,” Di got up from her seat and gave him a hug. , “it’s so good to see you.” He hugged her back, he didn’t trust himself to speak for a moment, he knew he’d just cry and he didn’t want to do that. They didn’t need to be worrying about him at the moment. He wasn’t the one fighting for his life. He hugged her back, then gave her a watery smile. She squeezed his arms in understanding. “Why don’t you take my seat for a bit.” She gestured to the chair. “Sarah we could go and join the boys for a coffee? I’m sure Charlie can keep Nick company for a bit.”
“Good idea,” Sarah gave Nick a gentle kiss on the cheek. “We’ll be back soon sweetheart, Charlie’s here to see you,” she said softly. “You’ll be ok Charlie?” He nodded at her, “yeah,” he managed to whisper. Sarah picked up her handbag and followed Di out into the corridor.
“Poor lad looks in bits,” Di said as they walked towards the lift. Sarah sighed, “he was there when it happened, I don’t think he’s fully processed it all just yet.” Di gave her a hug as they waited for the lift. “Maybe some time with Nick alone to process will help?” She suggested. Sarah shrugged her shoulders. Charlie just needed Nick to wake up. They all did, then this nightmare could be put behind them.

Charlie sat down in the chair next to Nick and gently picked up his hand. “Morning babe,” he said quietly “I’m back. How are you feeling this morning?” He knew Nick couldn’t answer him but it felt more normal to ask him questions rather than just talk at him. In his head Nick was replying. I’ve felt better Char. Charlie lent over and kissed his lips gently. “I missed you last night, I went to Sahars sleepover. Mum thought it would do me good,” he stroked Nicks hair as he spoke, the feeling was comforting to him. “She wanted to take my mind off it all I think…..it didn’t really work but it was nice to be distracted for a bit. Everyone is so worried about you babe. Tao is finding it hard to be called a hero. He’s worried about having hurt your ribs if you can believe that! He saved your life, I told him he can choose every movie we ever watch from now on! Sorry about that!” He smiled at Nick. He could imagine him protesting at the lack of marvel movies in the future….he looked at the machines keeping Nick alive. Their world had changed so much in the last 24 hours, it was crazy. This time yesterday they were in Nicks kitchen and he was happily baking. Charlie still couldn’t get his head around it all. Yesterday could have easily ended in tragedy. If Tao hadn’t jumped in and performed CPR then Nick would have died. Charlie finally let the tears flow. He lent his head gently on Nick’s chest and allowed himself to cry. He wanted Nick to stroke his hair and tell him that everything was going to be ok. But Nick just slept on under the sedation.
He jumped up at the sound of the door opening. He quickly wiped his eyes as the nurse appeared. She took one look at Charlie and her heart ached for him. He was so young. “Sorry to interrupt,” she said kindly, “ just need to do some checks on young Nick here.” Charlie nodded and moved away from the bed. He watched as she expertly checked his vitals and gave him more fluids and medicine. “Is he ok?” He asked nervously, sitting back down by Nicks side as soon as she was finished. She smiled at him. “It’s all going in the right direction, the swelling is going down, we just need to give him a little longer ok?” He nodded at her and thanked her as she left.

Sarah, David, Di and Rich all returned from the coffee shop. Sarah had brought a drink for Charlie who took it gratefully. They spent the afternoon sitting with Nick, taking turns to talk to him, read to him and hold his hand. David remained at the edge of the room , he couldn’t quite bring himself to talk to Nick in front of everyone else. But he helped out in other ways, getting food and drink for people and popping home to feed and walk Nellie. He was trying to show he cared in his own way, Sarah thought.
The doctor came to speak to them at around 5pm. He was surprised to see so many people in Nicks room but decided not to say anything. They were a quiet family and weren’t getting in the way of the nurses. He told them they would hope to reduce sedation and remove the ventilator in the morning if Nick had a peaceful night. The swelling had reduced significantly. The whole room breathed a sigh of relief at the good news. But Charlie couldn’t help worrying what would happen when they tried to wake Nick up. Would he have suffered any brain damage from being starved of oxygen? He desperately wanted him to wake up but at the same time he was scared of what the reality might be. He could see from the look on Sarah’s face that she was fighting the same doubts.
Di and Rich said their goodbyes and headed off to pick up the twins. They promised to be back first thing tomorrow. Diane gave Charlie a big hug as she left, “keep your chin up Charlie, positive thoughts only ok?” Charlie gave her a small smile and nodded.
A little while later his mum text to say he needed to be home for dinner. He sighed loudly. “You ok love?” Sarah looked at him with concern. David glanced up from his phone. “I have to go home,” Charlie grumbled, “l wish I could stay a bit longer.” Sarah smiled at him, watching as he traced his finger in Nicks palm. “You are welcome to stay longer if it’s ok with your mum. I can get David to drive you home? You can eat with us here if you like.” Charlie paled at the thought of being driven home by David. He looked over at him expecting to see him ready to protest and scowl at him but to his shock David just grunted in agreement. A car ride with David would be torture but it would be worth it to spend a little longer with Nick. “I’ll ask my mum,” Charlie stepped out the room to call her.
Jane was not happy about Charlie skipping dinner but he promised to eat in the canteen with Sarah. “You can check with her if you don’t believe me, ask her what I eat.” Jane relented then. He had permission to stay until 8pm but then she wanted him home.

Sarah and Charlie went to the canteen for some food, David offered to stay with Nick, so that he wasn’t alone, but Sarah knew that he just wanted some alone time with his brother. She could sense how awkward David had felt earlier, not showing any raw emotion or even making an effort to talk to his unconscious little brother. It wasn’t David being rude and uncaring. Sarah knew how incredibly hard this was for David, seeing his younger brother so poorly like this and he was struggling to process it and express his emotions.

Sarah purchased a ham and cheese baguette for herself and an extra shot latte, along with a cheese toastie and a cup of tea for Charlie who had been intent on paying for Sarah’s lunch, but she wouldn’t allow it. She’d grab something for David on their way back upstairs.  She thanked the cashier and carried the tray over to the table that Charlie was sat at in the corner.  “Here we go, love.” She smiled as she placed his food in front of him. Charlie gave her a small smile.  “Thanks, Sarah…”

Charlie sat for a bit longer but he knew he didn’t want to get on his mum’s bad side. She had been good enough to let him stay longer, so as much as he didn’t want to leave Nick, he knew Sarah would update him if anything were to change. He allowed David to run him home. It was quite possibly the most awkward car ride he’d ever had, but David didn’t behave like an absolute bellend for once.

Nick’s condition remained stable during the night. The doctors were pleased with his progress. The swelling in his throat had more or less subsided which allowed them to remove the ventilator and begin weaning him off his sedation when morning rolled around. Much to Sarah’s delight. It was now just a waiting game. The doctor had said Nick could wake up any minute or it could take longer, the ball was in his court now.  Sarah would be there when her baby opened his eyes. David had gone home for a sleep, but she refused to move an inch. Nicky would need her there here he came around.

Nick felt like he was floating on a cloud. His eyelids felt heavy as he struggled to open his eyes. He could hear an irritating beeping sound at the side of his head. Everything felt weird and fuzzy. He blinked his eyes a few times, trying to pry them open. Where was he? White. That was all he could see. White walls. White ceiling. The irritating beeping sound. The strong, sterile smell.  The irritating beeping beside him, he discovered was coming from a machine. He was in hospital. Why was he in hospital. What the heck was going on?? Why did his throat feel tight and weird? He turned his head to the side softly. There was his mum. She was sleeping on a chair beside his bed.  Nick began to feel very overwhelmed. He didn’t know what was going on and he didn’t like it. He glanced down to his hand. His mums fingers intertwined with his.  He gently wiggled his fingers and watched as Sarah’s head snapped up immediately. She rubbed her eyes.  She’d dosed off. She’d tried her absolute hardest to keep herself awake but she had barely slept in 2 days.  She glanced at nicks hand. She was sure she had felt his hand twitching, but then that would mean? She moved her gaze up to her son’s face. There, staring back at her, was her Nicky. He was awake. Her baby was awake.  He looked so confused.

“Oh baby..” Sarah said tearily as she ran her fingers through her sons hair.  “You’ve been very poorly.” She told him as she blinked back her tears, the last thing she wanted was to upset Nick by her being upset. Her baby was awake. This was positive. This was good. She searched his face for any signs of recognition, any sign that he recollected what had happened a couple of days ago. “Do you remember what happened, sweetheart?” She asked softly. Nick just looked up at her, his chocolate brown eyes a pool of confusion. He blinked a few times before gently shaking his head from side to side.  He had absolutely zero idea what was going on. Why was he here? Why did he have a tube poking out of his neck. He felt scared and overwhelmed. He blinked again as a stray tear rolled down his cheek. Sarah used her finger to brush it away as she shushed him, trying to soothe and provide him with as much comfort and reassurance as she could.  “Nicky, you were stung by a bee…” she said softly, watching as he just stared at her in confusion.  “You’re severely allergic to bees, baby.”    Nick blinked up at her, his face held a confused expression.  He tried to speak but no sound came out.  “You can’t talk right now, darling..” Sarah soothed as she stroked his cheek gently.  Nick’s eyes were full of fear. He was so scared. What had happened? What was going on? He couldn’t remember anything. The last thing he could remember was meeting up with Charlie and then meeting their friends in the park. Yes. That’s right. It had been Sahar’s birthday.  They were having a picnic in the park. Then it went dark. He couldn’t remember anything beyond that.  He swallowed. All he felt was pain and discomfort from the plastic tube sticking out of his mouth. He had a thin tube threaded up his nose. His skin felt raw and itchy. He was just so so confused. He blinked as tears began pooling in his eyes.

“Oh sweetheart.” Sarah cooed as she swept up his tears once more.  “You had a serious allergic reaction, Nicky.” She began to explain.  “You went into to anaphylactic shock.”  Nick blinked along as she spoke. This made no sense. Surely he would remember having an allergic reaction?   “You stopped breathing…” Nick’s eyes widened in shock. He had stopped breathing? This was like a horrendous nightmare that he just couldn’t wake up from.    “Your friend Tao, he gave you CPR..”    Nick blinked up at his mother in shock. Tao? Tao had given him CPR? Tao had saved his life?   He didn’t even think Tao liked him that much. He had convinced himself that Tao just tolerated him for Charlie’s sake. He couldn’t really blame him. Nick stood back last year and watched Harry relentlessly be a prick to Charlie and Tao and didn’t step in until it was too late.  He couldn’t believe it. Tao had saved his life.  It just felt so surreal.    “You still weren’t breathing very well when the paramedics arrived, your throat was very swollen so…um..” Sarah tried to keep her own emotions in check as she explained everything that had happened to Nick. She felt herself tearing up but tried her hardest to keep herself composed.  “The paramedics had to perform a procedure called a tracheotomy..” Nick just had a blank look on his face. What did that mean? He didn’t understand what any of this meant.   “They had to make an incision in your windpipe, baby, they inserted the tube to help you breathe…” Nick shakily brought his hand up to the tube that was sticking out of his neck. This little piece of plastic had also saved his life?  Sarah carefully reached out and moved Nick’s hand away from the trache.  The doctor had been very strict about nobody touching the tube with ungloved hands. The risk of infection could be life threatening.  “Don’t touch that, love.”  She said as she rubbed Nick’s arm in a comforting way.  This was good. Nick seems coherent. He seemed like he understood her and recognised her. He just looks so frightened, but she would be too if she woke up in hospital with a tube in her throat.  Nick wanted to talk desperately. He wanted to communicate. He felt trapped.  He could feel himself growing frustrated as the tears began to pool around his eyeballs again. He desperately tried to speak, he sure his lips to mouth the words but no sound came out. Only a little puffy sound of air exhaling from the trache.  Sarah could see the frustration on her son’s face. “What is it baby?” She asked.  Nick couldn’t speak but she was his mum. She could figure out what he wanted some other way. She watched as Nicks lips moved, forming shapes as he whispered what he was trying to say. she struggled to comprehend at first, but then it clicked. She knew exactly what he was saying. He was asking for Charlie.  Of course he was asking after Charlie.   “Charlie’s been so worried about you, darling.” She spoke. “He’s came to visit you a couple of times when you were sleeping.”  Nick’s eyes lit up and the sound of that. His Charlie had been here.  Nick pointed to his trache tube and Sarah was almost certain that he was asking when it would be taken out.  “Soon, baby…” she assured him. Hopefully the doctor would be satisfied when he popped in to examine Nick, now that he was conscious.  She missed her baby’s voice.

“Your Auntie Diane and uncle rich came to visit you.” Sarah smiled as she gestured to the get well soon card that was displayed on the bedside cabinet.   “The twins drew you a lovely get well soon drawing.” Sarah smiled as she picked up the card and held it out so that Nick would be able to see it from where he was lay down. Nick smiled fondly, he loved his little cousins dearly.   “Your brother was here, too…” Sarah pretended that didn’t see the way that Nick rolled his eyes.  “He’s been so worried about you…”   Nick just scowled. He’d believe that when hell freezes over.  Sarah tutted softly. She didn’t exactly blame Nick for being on edge with David though, especially given the way he has treated his younger brother since discovering his sexuality.   She hesitated for a moment before deciding against it. She had considered telling Nicky about Stéphane but then decided not to. Nick had just woken up from being medically sedated for almost two days. She didn’t want to distress him anymore than he visibly already was. She wouldn’t lie to her son. She’d always been honest and straight with him. She wasn’t going to make up excuses for her ex husband either. He did not deserve it, but she wasn’t going to tell Nick, not now anyway.  If much further down the line, Nicky were to ask about his father. Did he visit? Did he even care? She wasn’t going to lie.   Sarah’s eyes fell on the book that Diane had brought yesterday.  She smiled softly as she picked it up, tracing the cover with her fingers. She glanced at her son, who was watching her intently. His eyes then darting around the room as he took in his surroundings.   “Look what your auntie Di brought..” Sarah grinned as she held out the book.  “You loved this when you were little..”  Sarah smiled, emotionally, thinking back to the days where she would tuck a tiny little nick into bed and read him his favourite bedtime story.  “You wouldn’t go to sleep until one of us read you it…” Sarah chuckled.  “Every single night.”  She said amused as she glanced at her son and held back a giggle as Nick flashed her a look that said ‘it wasn’t every night’ Sarah smirked as she stroked Nick’s arm. “It more or less was.” She chuckled.  She glanced down at the book in her hands as she clutched it tightly.  “I could read it to you now, baby?” She suggested, trying to gage the expression on her sons face. Would Nick think that it was babyish? For her to read him a story? Or would he find it comforting?  She felt her heart burst when Nick gave her a big genuine smile and a little nod of the head.  “Okay, baby.” She grinned like the Cheshire Cat as she opened up the book and began reading.

“In the light of the moon a little egg lay on a leaf. One Sunday morning the warm sun came up… and POP, out of the egg came a tiny, very hungry caterpillar. He started looking for some food…”

Sarah continued reading to her son until she noticed Nicks eyes beginning to droop shut, as if he was fighting the sleep and trying to keep himself awake. She smiled softly as she closed the book over before reaching out and stroking his arm.  “You just sleep now, my darling…” she spoke softly as she traced her fingers up and down his arm, watching as Nicky gave in to the slumber.

The nurse who had been watching from the doorway, entered the room and put a hand on Sarah’s shoulder.   “That went really well.” She assured her.  “He seems to recognise you.”  Sarah smiled. That had been her biggest fear. The doctor had mentioned that there could be some brain damage as Nick had been oxygen starved for so long but her baby seems okay. She didn’t want to get her hopes up until the doctor had come around and properly examined Nick, but the early signs seemed positive.

Charlie couldn’t slow down as he quickly walked down the corridors of the hospital. Sarah had messaged him, saying Nick had woken up. Nick was awake! He was desperate to see his boyfriend, hold his hand and assure him everything was okay, that he was going to be okay.  He took a deep breath as he rounded the corner before Nick’s hospital room

He knocked gently on the open doorway, causing Sarah to look up from where she was fixed on Nick. Seeing Charlie’s apprehensive face, she immediately got up and engulfed him in a tight warm hug. “Oh darling, thank you for getting here so quickly. Nicks been asking after you.” Charlie’s eyes widened at the news. He was talking? He asked for him? He glanced over to the bed. Nick was fast asleep. The dreaded ventilator was thankfully gone, but the trach still remained, sticking angrily out of his throat. He was still wired up to lots of machines. He moved away from Sarah to stand by Nicks side. Carefully picking up his hand and holding it gently, mindful of the IV. “Nick?” He whispered quietly, “I’m here babe,” he felt himself welling up with the emotion of it all. He turned to Sarah. “How’s he doing?”
Sarah smiled softly as she sat down next to him. “He’s doing really well. They removed the ventilator and reduced sedation. He woke up about an hour ago. He was very confused and scared,” Charlie’s heart sank at the thought of his boyfriend like that. “He can’t speak with the trach in but he definitely knew who I was and where he was. He didn’t remember the incident at all.” She smiled at Charlie. “He kept trying to say your name, so I think maybe his brain is going to be ok? We will know more once the doctor comes to check on him.”
Charlie gently rubbed Nicks hand. “Well done baby,” he said quietly. “I’m so proud of you.”
Nick could hear people talking above him. His brain felt like lead. He was so tired. He tried to take a deep breath but he couldn’t get enough air in. His ribs screamed in protest and the trach stopped him taking more than a small amount of air at a time. He tried to focus on the voices. He recognised his mum straight away but who was she talking to? One of the doctors? No, it was Charlie. Charlie had come to see him. He desperately tried to focus on opening his eyes. The simple effort was exhausting, his body just wanted to sleep. But he needed to see Charlie. Eventually he managed to crack his eyes open and he turned his head to the side to be met with the anxious eyes of his boyfriend.
“He’s awake!” Charlie interrupted the quiet. Sarah took Nicks other hand and squeezed it. “Look who has come to see you Nicky,” she cooed rubbing his arm gently. Nick smiled slowly at Charlie who couldn’t help the tears that began to fall. “Hi babe,” he said with a watery smile. “I am so happy to see you awake.” Nick nodded slowly. He opened his mouth to speak, before remembering that was pointless and closing it again. “It’s ok, don’t try to talk.” Charlie leaned forward and kissed him gently on the cheek. “Just rest, I’m not going anywhere.” Nick nodded, his eyes never leaving Charlie’s.
They were interrupted by the arrival of Nicks doctor, who was very happy to see Nick awake once more. “Good morning all,” he said cheerily. He sanitised his hands before coming to stand by Nick. “Good to see you awake young man. You gave everyone quite the scare. You probably have a lot of questions but for the moment I just want to examine you so we can see about removing the tracheotomy how does that sound?” Nick gave him a nod to show he understood the doctor began his checks, starting with blood pressure, temperature, oxygen readings. He then examined Nick’s airway, checking the swelling.
“This all looks really promising,” he announced. Sarah beamed and Charlie let out a breath he hadn’t realised he was holding. “So what happens now?” Sarah asked, seeing Nicks questioning face. The doctor finished editing Nicks chart. “Well, removing the trache is not a quick process. We need to be sure he can breathe unaided first. So what I propose is we cap the trache, essentially closing it off and monitor Nick for a few hours. If he is able to breathe for that length of time we will remove the tubing. I can discuss the process with you and the aftercare he’ll require once we get to that stage. Sound ok Nick?” Nick was struggling to follow all the information but nodded. He wanted this tube out of his throat. The doctor arranged for oxygen and a nurse came to assist. Charlie watched curiously as they fitted a cap to the opening in the tubing. “Deep breath for me Nick,” the doctor stated and Nick tried to take a breath, but his ribs prevented him breathing deeply. “That’s ok, well done. Nurse, I want him on oxygen while he adjusts ok?” She nodded and began placing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. Nick tried to keep himself calm as he concentrated on breathing. In and out. It felt weird.
The doctor seemed pleased. “I’ll be back to check on him soon, in the meantime if he looks to be struggling for air at any point push the emergency button.” Sarah thanked him as he left. Charlie leaned over Nick. “You did it! How does it feel?”
Nick tried to talk, but it came out as a hoarse whisper, “sore,” he managed to say. Charlie smiled sympathetically. “It will be sore, I’m sure. God Nick I was so frightened. I thought you were going to die.” A tear ran down his cheek as he spoke and Nick lifted his hand to wipe it away. “Sorry,” he whispered. It felt strange to have a gap in his memory. This big huge event had happened and he didn’t remember any of it. But maybe that was for the best. Charlie chuckled, “no s word. I’m just so happy you are ok. Can I text the group and let them know?” Nick nodded, closing his eyes, he was so tired.
Charlie sent a text to the group to let them know Nick was awake and breathing on his own. The replies came in quickly.
Tara: oh thank god, we’ve been so worried.
Darcy: Nick!!!! I knew you would be ok!
Tao: I’m so glad to hear it. I’m sorry I hurt your ribs Nick.
Charlie scoffed at that message causing Nick to open his eyes and look at him curiously. “Tao’s apologising for breaking your ribs when he did the CPR,” he explained. “We keep telling him he’s a hero.” So that’s why his chest was so sore, Nick thought. He really did owe Tao his life, he wasn’t sure how he could ever thank him enough. “Tell him I said thanks,” he managed to wheeze out, his hand holding the oxygen mask tightly. “Nicky try to rest,” his mum scalded. He turned to her and nodded. Charlie carried on tapping on his phone and he drifted back to sleep.

Charlie: Nick told me to say thank you to you Tao. He knows what you did for him.
He watched as Tao kept typing, then stopping over and over. Eventually a message from Elle popped up.
Elle: can we maybe stop by and see Nick later? I think tao needs to see him.
Charlie sighed, Tao really needed to realise what a hero he was. He looked over at Nick who seemed to have nodded off again but was breathing ok. “ Sarah? Do you think Tao and Elle could come and see Nick? I think Tao is feeling really guilty about the broken ribs…..” Sarah smiled at him. “That silly boy. Of course. Maybe let’s wait and see how he does with the trache removal later though first?” Charlie nodded his agreement and messaged Elle.
They passed the next couple of hours, Nick was in and out of consciousness, still very groggy from the sedation and the effort of breathing. Eventually the doctor returned. “Everything has gone perfectly,” he announced. “Let’s see about removing this tube hmm?” He carefully explained the procedure to Sarah and Nick. How after removing the tube Nick would be left with a stoma that would take a week or so to heal. He’d need to keep it clean, covered and dry. And when he wanted to talk he would need to gently press on it to close the hole up.
“Will if leave a scar?” Sarah asked. “He will probably have a small scar, yes, but it should fade over time. Now, you ready Nick?”
Nick nervously nodded and Charlie took his hand, squeezing it tight, “just look at me babe, it’ll be over quickly.” The doctor raised Nicks bed so he was sitting up.
Charlie was right, the procedure was quick and relatively painless. The doctor talked Sarah through how to clean the stoma area and then he gently pressed a bandage over it. “All done,” he said triumphantly. “Now Nick we will need to keep you here for a day or so just to be sure you are ok. But there’s no need to be in ICU anymore, I’ll arrange for a transfer to paediatrics. Nick gently pressed on the wound as he’d been shown, “ thank you,” he whispered. “You are most welcome! We will get you set up with an epi pen too while you are here so if you ever get stung again you can treat it quickly” Sarah thanked the doctor as he left. “Why don’t you tell Tao to come now, before Nicky here falls asleep again!”
Less than half an hour later Tao’s anxious face appeared at the door, followed by Elle carrying a large helium get well soon balloon and some flowers. “Hi,” Tao said nervously. Charlie rushed over to the them and hugged them fiercely. “Hi guys, thanks for coming.” Tao and Elle made their way over to Nick who was watching them fondly from his bed. “Nick!” Elle leaned over and hugged him gently, mindful of his ribs. Tao stood awkwardly next to her until Nick raised his arms questioningly waiting for a hug. Tao smiled and hugged him back. “I’m so glad you are ok” Tao said quietly, “we have all been so worried. I’m sorry I hurt you with the cpr, I didn’t think I had pushed that hard. I’m really sorry….”
Nick cut him off with a glare. “You….saved…my…..life,” he wheezed. “The ribs will heal.” He smiled tiredly at Tao. “I owe you my life.” He lent back against the pillows, exhausted from the sentence but glad he’d said it. “Exactly,” charlie added, “ Tao you are a hero, stop beating yourself up!” Sarah smiled at him. “Tao, we owe you so much, you are always welcome at our house. I will find a way to thank you for what you did.” Tao felt himself welling up as Elle hugged him. “I told you babe! You are a hero.” Tao let out a watery chuckle. “Ok fine, I get it, I’m a hero.”he looked over to Nick who was struggling to stay awake. “When can you get out of here?” Charlie answered for him, “hopefully in a day or two, they want to keep an eye on him just to be safe.” He stroked Nicks hair as he spoke. The friends chatted around Nick while he dozed, reassured by the constant presence of Charlie’s hand in hair. Eventually the porters came to move him and the friends said goodbye. Charlie had to go home too, leaving. Nick with Sarah in his new room on paediatrics. Nick glanced at his mum. She looked shattered. He took a breath and held his hand over his stoma, “mum, go home,” he whispered. She snapped up and looked at him. “I can’t leave you darling.” What kind of mother would do that? Nick smiled, “I’m just going to be sleeping. Please go home and rest.” He looked at her seriously and she finally admitted defeat. “Ok baby. But you promise to get them to call me if you need me. I’ll be back first thing tomorrow.” Nick smiled in satisfaction and drifted back off to sleep.

True to her word Sarah was back bright and early. Nick was still fast asleep and had had a peaceful night. Only waking when nurses came to check on him. They were pleased with his progress, managing to remove the feeding tube in the early morning and convincing him to have a small bowl of porridge which he did not enjoy. The doctor came to do his rounds in the late morning. “Nicks doing so well,” he said, “I don’t see why he needs to stay here any longer. I’m happy to discharge him. But he needs to rest for a few days while his stoma heals. No school or anywhere he could pick up an infection for 2 weeks. I’ve booked him an outpatient appointment with the allergy clinic to discuss his future needs.” Sarah thanked him and hugged Nick carefully.
“You ready to get home baby?” He nodded enthusiastically. Sarah helped him change into joggers and a tshirt and gathered up his ballon and flowers. Nick walked slowly and steadily to the doorway, his energy levels were still very low and his ribs sore but he was so ready to go home. Back to his comfy bed and tv. They walked to the car park. Nick noticed an insect flying near him and instantly felt a spark of panic. Sarah noticed and squeezed his hand. “Just a fly darling,” she soothed. Nick sighed with relief as he climbed into the passenger seat. “It’s only natural you’d be wary of insects for a bit Nicky, but remember, you’ve gone 17 years without ever being stung before.” Nick nodded. She was right obviously. He closed his eyes as they drove home. Before he knew it they were back at the house. Nellie was barking happily in greeting as he bent down and scratched behind her ears. “Mum?” Nick whispered, “can Charlie come over?” He asked. Sarah grinned. “I texted him before we left the hospital, he’ll be here in a minute.” Sure enough the doorbell went and Nick could make out the shadow of Charlie through the frosted glass. His mum really was the best, she knew what he needed and that was Charlie cuddles on the sofa. “Thanks mum, “ he said quietly as he opened the door to the beaming smile of his boyfriend. “Hi,” he smiled back.

Chapter Text

Sarah hugged her dressing gown close to her as she rushed down the hall towards Nick’s bedroom. This was the third time this week that she had been awoken by the sound of distressed screams coming from her son’s room. Sarah pushed open the door, rushing inside. The sight that greeted her, breaking her heart in two.  Nick was thrashing from side to side, tangled up in his duvet as he tossed and turned, rolling from side to side. His forehead was creased in distress and a thin layer of sweat stuck to his forehead. His hands were balled into fists, wrapped around his blankets as he wept.   “No!” He cried, his sobs getting louder and harder. “NOO!” He repeated. “STOP…please.” He whimpered.  Sarah choked back her own sobs as she rushed over to the bed, kneeling down at his bedside. She gently shook her son.  “Nicky? Baby… it’s okay, you’re okay.” She soothed, brushing back his sweat soaked fringe and trying to wake him up from his distressed slumber. Nick continued to shift uncomfortably in his sleep, crying out.  “Don’t hurt him…” He was sobbing hard. Sarah knew her son was reliving the attack.  “Get off of me!!” He was screaming now. He was terrified.   “Nick? Sweetheart…” Sarah continued to soothe as tears pricked at her own eyes. It was breaking her heart to see her little boy so distressed.  “Mums here. I’m here…” she soothed him as she rubbed gentle motions on his back as his body shuddered in obvious fear. “It’s okay baby, it’s okay.” She just kept repeating. “You’re safe. It’s just a nightmare.”

Nightmares.  It had been 3 months since the attack took place. The brutal attack that left her son fighting for his life in hospital. The meaningless attack that saw 4 grown adult men beat her son to a pulp and stab him all because they were homophobic and didn’t like the fact that Nick was holding his boyfriend’s hand.  Nick may have physically healed from the ordeal except from the scars that would live on his body for the remainder of his life. Torturous reminders of what had happened that night. Mentally, though, Nick was far from recovery. After being released from hospital he had completely closed up on himself. The only time he would want to leave the house was to go to school. He would come straight home as he was advised against playing rugby until he had completely healed.  He made up excuses when it came to seeing his friends. He rejected countless sleepover invites, didn’t attend both Imogen and Issac’s birthday celebrations. He barely walked Nellie anymore and when he did he would quickly walk her around the block once and that was it. Sarah had become increasingly worried about her son in the weeks that followed him being discharged from home. She’d spoken to the GP who had mentioned that Nick could be displaying signs of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, considering what had happened to him and learning that one of his attackers were still out there, could come back for him at anytime to finish off what he had started. Nick was a shell of the boy he had once been. The GP had been very helpful, referring Nick to a therapist, which at first he had point blank refused to go to. Sarah was at her wits end. She knew Nick needed professional help. She couldn’t make things better for him on his own. No one could. Not even Charlie. Nick had even shut Charlie out. He wouldn’t talk to anyone. He wouldn’t go anywhere. The nightmares would keep him up during the night and he was exhausted. It took a few weeks of the therapy sessions for Sarah to begin to see a change in her son. He began opening up more and letting her in. He started wanting to take Nellie out on longer walks again and wanting to see his friends. He opened up to Charlie. He wasn’t magically better but he was definitely on the mend, that was until a few weeks ago. The police had managed to catch up with Tony Fitzgerald. When allegations against him were made that he had carried out a similar attack on another young gay male.

Nick woke up in a cold sweat, jolting upright, panting as he struggled to catch his breath. His breathing was heavy and erratic as he slowly realised that it had all been a bad dream and that he was safe. He was in his own bed, in his bedroom. It had been a nightmare, but it had all felt so real.  “Sssshh..” Sarah soothed as she reached out to gently lay him back against the pillows. Nick flinched at her touch, his eyes wide, darting around the room. He blinked as a stream of tears rolled down his cheeks. He was clearly terrified.  “It’s okay darling. You’re okay. You’re safe. I promise..” Sarah soothed as she smoothed out his damp hair with her fingers.  “It was just a bad dream. It’s alright…”   She thought Nicky had gotten passed this but ever since the date for the court hearing came through he’d been on edge. Has her baby not been through enough? Now he was having to stand up in a courtroom of strangers, reliving the night that he was viciously attacked for what? For being himself. He was going to have to come face to face with his attackers again.  No wonder he was petrified.  It wasn’t fair.  She knew it was important. Those monsters needed to be sentenced and locked away for a very long time. Nick needed the justice. He deserved it but seeing her son spiral backwards in his recovery was snapping her heart in two.  She wanted to take it all away. She was his mum.  She was supposed to protect him from bad things like this.  She felt helpless.

Nicks breathing eventually started to slow down as he began to calm. Nellie had snuggled in to his side, sensing that her boy was upset or distressed or both and wanting to provide him with comfort.  Sarah picked herself up off the floor, perching herself on the edge of her son’s bed. Nick was just staring blankly at the ceiling, breathing in and out. Inhaling deeply and exhaling softly as his breathing regulated.   “You need to change out of that shirt, baby.” She told him, noticing he was drenched in sweat.  “I don’t want you to catch a chill.”  She rummaged through his chest of drawers, retrieving a plain white t-shirt.   “Do you want me to help you darling?”  She asked. Nick made no effort to reply, he wouldn’t even look at her.  He was in a trance.  “Nicky?” She tried again, taking his hand and giving it a little squeeze. Nick blinked his eyes a couple of times, a few stray tears rolling down his face. He turned his head to glance at her.  “Sorry.” He said quietly. Sarah felt the air in her throat be suspended as her heart shattered for the hundredth time that evening.  “Oh baby no.” She said softly pulling him into her chest and holding him close, like she used to do when he was a little boy and got scared.  “You don’t have to say sorry.” She assured him. She’d sit up with him every night and soothe him back to sleep if it meant he felt safe and secure.   Nick let out a shaky breath as he relaxed in to his mum’s embrace.  “It felt so real mum…” he said, his voice wobbling.   “They held me down. I…I couldn’t get to Charlie.” He sobbed.  Sarah rubbed soothing circles on her son’s back as she whispered words of comfort in to his hair.   “It was just another nightmare.”

Nick shook his head as he pulled his head away and glanced at his mum, his chocolate brown eyes in a pool of tears.  “It was different this time…” he whispered. Every nightmare had been the same up until now. It was the exact same thing every time. Reliving the brutal attack but tonight it was different.

Nick struggled against his attackers as they restrained him. His arms were painfully twisted behind his back. His face felt wet and sticky. Blood. From where they had punched him repeatedly. His ribs were aching from being stamped on. His head hurt but what hurt the most was the sight in front of him.  Charlie tumbled to the ground after being punched so hard that Nick could feel it.   “NOOOO!” Nick bellowed as he watched two of the four men take turns kicking and punching his boyfriend. Nick thrashed around, desperately trying to free himself. Not charlie. He didn’t care that they’d beaten him to a pulp as long as they left Charlie alone.  “Leave him alone!!” Nick screamed, tears pouring down his cheeks. This was torture. Being held back and forced to watch them hurt Charlie.  He tried to look away but they didn’t let him. He closed his eyes but they slapped him hard and forced him to watch.   "You’re not so tough now are you faggot??!” One of the men screamed at Nick as he swung his leg back and kicked Charlie hard in the side, a sickening crunch was heard.  “CHARLIE!!!”  Nick tried to pull himself out of their grip but they wouldn’t let him.

“What do you mean, darling?” Sarah asked hesitantly as Nick allowed her to help him change out of his damp shirt Nick might not want to talk about it but whatever it was has upset him massively.  Nick glanced at his mum, his eyes swimming with tears.    “They hurt Charlie….” He sobbed.  “They hurt Charlie and they held me back..” he was crying hard.  “I couldn’t help him.” The floodgates opened again as the tears dripped down his face.    “Oh baby.” Sarah soothed hugging him tightly.  “It’s okay…” she stroked his damp hair.  “It was just a bad dream, that’s all…” Nick pulled himself into a sitting position and started fumbling around his duvet like he was looking for something. Sarah frowned, watching him with intent.  “Nick?” She questioned.  “What are you looking for baby?” Nick ignored her, not in a rude way, just in a preoccupied way as he searched for what he was looking for. His phone. He found it buried under his pillow.  “I need to make sure Charlie is ok…”.  Sarah looked at her son as if he was daft.  “Nicky, sweetheart.” She said softly.  “It’s 4 in the morning.” She sighed.  “Charlie will be asleep.”   Nick shook his head.  “No. I need to check. I need to…” he said as he unlocked his phone. How on earth was he supposed to sleep without checking in on Charlie after that.   Sarah sighed, she knew there was no talking Nick round. He was a stubborn one.  She knew there was no way he was going to settle back down to sleep until he had called Charlie so she allowed him to proceed.

“Hello?”  Charlie’s voice came through the speaker, it was quiet and sleepy.  “Nick? You ok? It’s 4am…”   Sarah could see the instant relief on her son’s face as he heard his boyfriend’s voice. His breathing had started to slow down again as he relaxed against his pillows.  “Char?” Nick whispered.  “You’re okay? You’re not hurt?” Nick asked desperately his voice wavering and sounding more like a choked sob.  Charlie bolted upright in his own bed. Where on earth was all this coming from. Wait. Was Nick crying??  “Nick? What’s going on??”    “You didn’t answer my question…” Nick sniffed, his eyes wide with fear.  “Are you okay?”     “Nick I am fine…I promise.” Charlie replied softly.  “I am at home and I am in my bed..” He said slowly, feeling like Nick needed full reassurance.   “They didn’t hurt you?”    Charlie frowned. Who?  Then then penny finally dropped and it started clicking in to place.      “Nick? Did you have another nightmare?”  He asked, his heart breaking. It pained him that he wasn’t there to comfort his boyfriend who was evidently distressed and upset.      “It felt so real Char…”. Nick sobbed. The nightmares were so vivid and real and it was like he was back there again and again, night after night.   “It was only a dream.” Charlie spoke softly.  “It isn’t real Nick.”    “They hurt you…Charlie.”   Nick sobbed.  “They hurt you so badly and….and they made me watch.”  He sobbed, his chest heaving heavily.  Sarah had to blink back tears. Her baby was so distraught.    “I’m so sorry..” Nick cried.  “I tried….I promise…I tried but they held me back.”    Charlie’s face was wet with tears.  “Nick..” He soothed.  “It didn’t happen…It was a nightmare..”    Sarah who had been listening to the exchange couldn’t watch any longer. She knew that Nick wasnt going to be convinced that Charlie was actually alright until he saw it for his own two eyes. She held out her hand. “Can I see your phone for a second, darling.”  Nick glanced at her confused, but he found himself peeling his phone away from his ear and handing it over to his mum’s outstretched hand, curiously.
Sarah put the phone to her own ear.  “Charlie? Its Sarah, can you do me favour darling?” She asked.   Charlie felt comfort in hearing Sarah’s voice because at least he knew that Nick wasnt alone. “Yeah.” he replied, wondering what she was about to ask from him.  “I am going to FaceTime you…can you answer.” She asked.  Charlie automatically knew why. Why hadn’t he thought of that? Nick needed to see him.  Charlie pulled the phone away from his ear and glanced at the phone waiting for the FaceTime request to pop up on the screen and when it did, he answered it instantly.

Charlie pulled himself up in to a full sitting position and flicked on the bedside lamp as he waited for the camera to load. Sarah quickly handed Nick his phone back and switched on his beside lamp.   She watched the instant relief that washed over her youngest son’s face as he saw Charlie. “You’re okay…” he breathed out.  “I told you, so.” Charlie smiled softly, although his heart was aching at the sight of Nick’s tearstained face.   “Do you think you’ll be able to go back to sleep now?” Charlie asked. He was exhausted but he wouldn’t be able to allow himself to go back to bed until he knew that Nick was ok.   “I…I don’t know.” Nick replied.  “I was scared, Char..”    Charlie sighed.  He really thought Nick’s nightmares had stopped since he had started attending his therapy sessions, but obviously not.     “How about I promise to stay right here on the phone until you drop off?” Charlie suggested. Sarah stood up.  “I’ll fetch you a warm drink, sweetheart.”   Sarah told him as she kissed the top of his head. She knew she wouldnt be able to sleep herself until she knew that Nick was sleeping peacefully., but she figured Charlie had things covered here.

Sarah let Nick stay home from school the next day. He was completely exhausted. He’d finally nodded off around 6am and she’d disconnected the call to Charlie, thanking him for helping. She kept checking on him throughout the morning, relieved to see him fast asleep each time. Charlie had gone to school, promising to stop by as soon as he could.

It was around midday when she heard him shuffle down the stairs, his blanket wrapped round him like a cape. “hi baby,” Sarah got up from the dining table where she was trying to get a bit of work done. She went over and hugged him tightly. “How are you feeling?”
Nick hugged her back, then sighed. He felt like lead. His body was so tired and his mind felt hazy. He didn’t want to worry his mum any more than he already had though. “fine,” he lied. He went to the kitchen to put the kettle on. “Let me do that,” Sarah insisted, she shooed him into the dining area and onto a chair. “How about bacon sandwiches for lunch? You must be hungry?” Nick nodded gratefully and pulled out his phone from his joggers pocket. He swiped through his texts from friends asking why he wasn’t at school and went straight to his messages with Charlie.

Char: hope you got some sleep this morning. I’ll be round after school for cuddles. ❤️❤️

He smiled softly, remembering how Charlie had helped him to calm down last night after his nightmare. He typed out a response and put his phone back on the table.

Nick: I’m sorry about last night. I hope you aren’t too tired at school today. 😴

He couldn’t believe how different the nightmare had been. It gave him a small insight into how it must have been for Charlie to witness his attack. He had felt so helpless and scared. He watched his mum bustling in the kitchen, grilling the bacon and buttering the bread while she made some tea. The nightmares had come back with a vengeance since he found out he needed to give evidence at the trial. He didn’t want to do it, he was absolutely terrified. But he knew that he had to. Those men needed to be put behind bars and it was his and Charlie’s evidence that would do it. He had another month until the trial took place.
“Here we are,” Sarah placed two bacon sandwiches in front of him along with a steaming mug of tea.” He smiled at her, “thanks mum. For everything.” He felt his throat tighten as tears threatened to fall. Sarah gently tousled his hair. “You don’t need to thank me baby, it’s what mums are for.” She sat down opposite him with her own sandwich and they ate in silence.
Sarah finished her sandwich and focused her attention on her son. He looked shattered. Sure he was all healed up physically. Although she could see a small scar peeking out from his fringe. But to look at him you’d never know what horrific thing had happened to him a few months ago. She was so worried about him emotionally though. The nightmares were exhausting and increasing. How was he going to get through the next month? What if they didn’t get found guilty? That would kill him.

“Mum?” Nicks voice broke the quiet. “You ok baby?” She looked at him, waiting for his response. Nick swallowed. He wanted to tell him mum how scared he was, how he was worried about reliving everything at the trial. How he didn’t want to do it, how he was scared they would come after him again. But then he looked at his mums worried expression and his mouth closed again. He couldn’t cause her any more pain than he already had. She’d nursed him back to health, helping him, to wash and change and even eat when everything hurt too much. She’d changed his bandages. Taken him to countless medical appointments and more recently solicitor appointments. He couldn’t let her down. “Nothing,” he eventually said, noting her disappointment that he had obviously changed his mind about what he was going to say. She smiled gently at him. “Why don’t you go in the lounge and watch some tv while I finish my work. Charlie will be along in a few hours.” He nodded at her and wrapped his blanket back around himself. He flopped down on the sofa, Nellie instantly jumping up to squeeze into the tiny space next to him. He stroked her fur absent mindedly before picking up the remote control and scrolling for something brainless to watch. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and fished it out, smiling as he saw a text from Charlie.

Char: don’t you dare use the s word! Sitting at lunch with the others, they all say hi and feel better soon. Can’t wait to see you later. Love you. 🥰

Nick smiled. He hearted the message, then returned to the tv screen finally settling on rewatching the avengers for the millionth time. As the movie played he navigated to google on his phone. His searches were all about trials. What to expect, what he would have to do. He read horror stories of trials gone wrong and witnesses ending up murdered by the accused. He felt panic rising in his chest and he squashed it down chucking his phone on the sofa next to him. He didn’t want to do this. The solicitor had told him he could give evidence in a different room due to his age . He hadn’t decided if he wanted to do that or not. Part of him felt like that was a cowardly thing to do. He wanted to look them in the eye. He wanted the jury to see him. To side with him. But maybe that wasn’t a good idea. His mum didn’t want him anywhere near those men. He sighed, rubbing his face with his hands. He was so tired. He just wanted this all to be over. He’d finally felt like he was claiming his life back but now it was slipping through his fingers again.

The doorbell startled him and he glanced at the clock. It was 4pm, he’d spent the entire afternooon doom scrolling in google. He quickly rushed to the hallway and opened the door to see Charlie smiling at him. He held out his arms and Charlie rushed in, hugging him tightly. “Hi,” he breathed, not wanting to let go. “Hi,” Charlie answered. They remained in the doorway until Sarah shouted from the kitchen, “close the door Nicky. You are letting the cold in!” Nick sheepishly let go of Charlie and shut the front door. Sarah chuckled, “tea boys?” “Please!” They both replied as Charlie took off his coat and shoes and chucked his school bag down on the floor. “You go upstairs, I’ll bring it up to you in a minute.”
Nick grabbed Charlie’s hand and led him up the familiar stairs to his room. He stopped at the doorway, realising he hadn’t made any effort to make his bed or tidy his room since last night. He looked guiltily at Charlie. “Sorry for the mess, I’ve been in the lounge all afternoon.” Charlie rolled his eyes at him playfully. “It’s fine, i dont care if your room is a mess!” He breezed past Nick, opening his curtains and cracking open the top window to let some air in. He started making Nicks bed before he even realised what he was doing. “Oh my god, don’t tidy my room!” He groaned, quickly picking up the dirty laundry from the floor and putting it in the hamper. Charlie laughed at him, ignoring his protests as he straightened the bedding and smoothed it out. “There, that’ll do.” He said triumphantly, “now come on, I believe I owe you cuddles.” Nick smiled the first genuine smile of the day as he leapt onto the bed and squashed Charlie into the mattress, his full weight on top of him.
“Oh my god, get off me you giant rugby idiot!” Laughed Charlie. Nick rolled off him and laid down beside him. Charlie wrapped his arms round him and Nick laid his head on Charlie’s shoulder. “Thank you for coming,” he mumbled into Charlie’s shirt.
Charlie smoothed his hair down and gently rubbed his arms. “You don’t need to thank me,” Charlie soothed. “I’ll always be here for you.”
They were interrupted by a knock on the door. “Tea boys,” Sarah called. She came in with a tray with two mugs of tea and a plate of biscuits. “Thanks mum,” Nick said. She softly closed the door behind her and left them to it. She really hoped Nick would be able to open up to Charlie a little after last night.

Nick and Charlie sat up on the bed, leaning against the head board as they sipped their tea, dunking the biscuits in and munching quietly. “Want to talk about it?” Charlie eventually broke the silence. Nick sighed. “Not really….l just want it all to be over,” his lip quivered. “I’m so scared about the trial Char…” he whispered. Charlie took Nicks tea and placed it on the side before gathering him in a hug. “I know,” he replied ,”I’m scared too. I don’t want to see those bastards either.” Charlie didn’t want to tell Nick that he relived that night over and over in his head. He didn’t have the nightmares that Nick did, but he saw that night when he closed his eyes. He lived with the crushing guilt of not being able to stop the attack. His evidence was going to be crucial. He was going to have to tell the court what happened to Nick in graphic detail. Words he hadn’t uttered to a soul since he told the police that night. Charlie held Nick as he sniffled, obviously trying not to cry. “Hey,” he forced Nick to look him in the eyes, “you don’t have to pretend to be strong with me babe,” he looked at him with determination, “I was there. I know how awful it was. “ he watched Nicks face crumple and tears pool in his eyes. He hugged him tightly as he let the tears flow. He was so tired, and emotional. He allowed Charlie to hold him and rub gentle circles in his back as he cried and cried. Eventually he ran out of tears and pulled away, grabbing a tissue to dry his eyes and blow his nose.
“I love you,” he mumbled, feeling a little self conscious. He looked up and saw Charlie looking at him with nothing but love and compassion. “I love you too Nick. You aren’t on your own in this ok? We will get through it together.”

The next few weeks for Nick and Charlie were anything but fun. Just a reminder that the trial was looming. In less than two weeks they’d both have to give evidence about that horrendous evening that resulted in Nick being beaten to a pulp and stabbed, not only that but they’d have to listen to the scum of the earth that had done it try to prove their innocence and convince the jury that they weren’t guilty. Nick and Charlie would have to deal with both sides. The prosecution and the defence. It was a lot for anyone to have to deal with, yet alone 17 and 15 year old kids. Charlie was dealing with things the best he could. Geoff had been a great help. Charlie had spent hours retelling the events of that horrific night, how scared he had been, how hard it was seeing Nick be beaten up like that but not being able to do anything to help. Geoff had listened, supported and assured Charlie that it wasn’t his fault and that the only ones to blame were the guys that had done this. His parents and Tori had been great, too. They’d been so supportive and patient with him. His friends too. He’d say he was coping with things rather well. Nick, on the other hand. Wasn’t coping well at all…

Nick forced his eyes open as his alarm blared for the fourth time that morning. He reached under his pillow and snoozed the alarm again. If he wanted to make it on time for school, he should have been up half an hour ago. He should be showered and downstairs eating cornflakes and drinking tea right now. That was the thing. He didn’t want to be on time for school. He didn’t want to go to school at all. He didn’t want to leave this bed. He didn’t want to talk to anyone. He didn’t even want to see Nellie and that certainly was not like him. He just wanted to curl up under his duvet and forget about the world for a while, well at least until after the trial, but that wasn’t going to be possible. He needed to be there. He needed to give his evidence if there stood any chance of those monsters being sentenced. Nick just felt physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted and drained. As much as he tried to push the upcoming trial to the back of his mind. It just wasn’t possible. The nightmares brought it all back to him. Every night that he would bolt upright screaming out in fear. It just felt like he was going through it over and over again and he didn’t know how to make it stop. Robert. His therapist. He said it was normal for him to feel like this, given what he had been through. Physically and mentally. Nothing about this felt normal. He felt like a shell of the boy that he used to be. The things that he used to enjoy, didn’t interest him anymore. Long walks in the park with Nellie, Rugby, sleepovers with the Paris squad. Milkshake dates and cinema trips. None of it interested him anymore. He didn’t want to do anything other than lay in bed. His mum was worried about him. She had expressed that numerous times. His friends, too and Charlie. They didn’t have to be. He was fine. He was just dealing with things, in his own way. That’s all.

“Nicky? You nearly ready?” That was his mum’s voice, outside his bedroom door, followed by a gentle knock on the door. He didn’t reply. He wasn’t being rude, he just didn’t have the energy. He didn’t have energy for much these days. He pulled himself upright, slightly, holding his body weight up by his elbows. He let out a heavy sigh. “Are you ready yet?” No! He wasnt ready. He didn’t want to be ready. School was the last place he wanted to go. It had been awful lately. Everyone knew that the trial was soon. It was the topic of all conservations. It was all everyone wanted to talk about. Nick. He couldn’t think of anything worse.

Nick snapped out of his thoughts by his bedroom door opening. Sarah popped her head around the doorframe, shocked to see her son still in bed, especially when it was after quarter past 8 and Nick should be leaving for school around about now. “Nick?” She asked, confused. Nick was normally an early riser on schooldays but she wasn’t totally surprised. Nick couldn’t be further from himself, the last few weeks if he had tried.

Nick glanced at his mum. She was such an angel. She had been his absolute rock over the last few months so he felt bad for lying to her. He just didn’t have the energy for anything else, right now. “I don’t feel very good…” he mumbled quietly, failing to make eye contact with her as he was afraid he’d hide himself away. Sarah frowned as she walked over to the bed. “Oh, darling. What’s the matter?” She asked as she perched down on the edge of the bed before lifting the palm of her hand up and resting it on Nick’s forehead. Her frown deepening. “Hmm..” she said softly as she moved her hand his neck. “You don’t feel feverish.” Nick glanced at her as he hugged his arm around his abdomen. “My stomach hurts.” He mumbled. He’d never faked being ill before, he’d never felt the need to, so he knew he was probably making a pretty pathetic attempt at it right now. He couldn’t go to school today. He just couldn’t.

Sarah glanced at her son. She wasn’t stupid. She could tell that her son wasn’t ill. She wasn’t a mum for nothing, she’d had years experience of David feigning sickness to get out of school. Nick had never tried to pull this before. She wasn’t saying Nick didn’t have a stomachache. She just thought, maybe there was another reason for it? She could tell that her son has been riddled with anxiety, ever since the letter from the court came through. Nick has began spiralling. The nightmares, cancelling plans with his friends and Charlie, barely wanting to walk Nellie anymore, his spark and passion for rugby had disappeared and his grades at school were beginning to slip. Her son was starting to fall apart before her very eyes and she had no idea how to help him. She didn’t even know where to begin, but it was breaking her heart watching her son like this. Maybe she could speak to Rob. It took Nick a while to feel comfortable opening up in front of his therapist. It took a good few sessions but Sarah could always see the anxieties and tension that her son felt, slowly settle down after a session with Rob. “Okay, baby.” She said softly as she ran her fingers through his hair. “I’ll ring the school now and then how about I make some tea and a hot water bottle for your tum?” Nick nodded as he collapsed back against the pillows. He had been convinced she was going to see through his lies and make him go to school, but then again that wasn’t really in Sarah’s nature. “Thanks, mum.” He said softly as he watched her leave before rolling back on to his side and pulling the duvet up to his chin.

Nick’s morning and afternoon was spent in bed. Sarah had made him tea and toast, he’d drank the tea but barely touched the toast which just deepened Sarah’s concerns for her son even more. She brought him a hot water bottle for his ‘stomach-ache’ although she wasn’t fully convinced he even had one and she’d called Truham grammar to inform them that Nick was ill and would be absent from school. She then excused herself from work. She couldn’t leave Nick alone like this. She knew if she’d gone to work, she would just spent her full day worrying about him, so she’d just so that, but from the comfort of home. She couldn’t help but think that things were about to get a whole lot worse, with the trial happening in a couple of weeks. How could things get any worse?

Nick woke up for the second time that day, he rolled over and stretched. How long had he been sleeping for? He glanced at the bedside clock. 2pm. He’d slept all of the morning and part of the afternoon away. Luckily, his sleep hadn’t been plagued with nightmares and flashbacks. This time anyway. Nick pulled himself into a sitting position, propping the pillows behind his head as he reached out to grab his phone from the nightstand. He glanced at his Home Screen. He had over 15 notifications. He sighed. Maybe not letting anyone know that he was staying off school today wasnt a wise idea. He knew people would worry. Everything just seemed like such an effort and he felt like he had zero energy. He glanced to his side, an untouched sandwich and glass of orange squash sat on his bedside table. Bless his mother. He grimaced though. He wasn’t hungry, not in the slightest. His stomach just constantly felt like a washing machine going through a turbo wash. He was scared that anything he consumed he would just throw straight back up. He reached out for the glass of juice though. He gulped it down as it relieved the dryness in his throat. He sat the empty glass down before reading through his notifications.

Charlie: Hey babe. You weren’t in form?? Are you late? Or are you staying home today?

Tao: Are you sick??? 🤢

Tara: Hey! Heard you’re off school today. Are you poorly?? We’re all worried about you. Nick xx 💖

Otis: heard you’re out of school mate. I take it we won’t be seeing you at rugby 🏉 again?

Christian: Nick? You okay mate??

Charlie: ok! I am officially worried. You’re definitely not in school. Are you sick? Or is it something else?

Nick just sighed as he locked his phone and sat it on the side without replying to any of the messages. He didn’t know what to say to people who constantly asked if he was okay? No he wasn’t Okay. He was far from Okay, but he didn’t know how to deal with it. He just wanted his brain to stop. To stop reminding him of what happened. He wanted the nightmares to stop because every time he relived that night over and over again, it just broke him a little bit more. He was tired all the time, because he wasn’t sleeping well and it made him cranky. He couldn’t eat because his stomach was always revelling against the very idea. He wouldn’t walk Nellie because he was petrified of being attacked again. He didn’t want to surround himself with his friends because he was terrified of crumbling in front of them so shutting himself away felt like the only thing he could do. Charlie had spent the night on Saturday. It had taken a lot of persuading to get both Sarah and Jane to agree to it. Charlie had suggested that maybe if he was there Nick wouldn’t have nightmares. Oh how wrong he had been. Charlie was awoken around 3am in the morning to Nick screaming out in sheer panic and fear, soaked in sweat, breaking his heart crying. It had taken both Sarah and Charlie to calm him down. It had resulted in Julio picking Charlie up and Nick spending the rest of the night sleeping in his mother’s bed. They had all agreed that it has been Nick’s worst episode yet.

He glanced up as there was a soft knock on the door. His mum was there, hovering in the doorway. She perched down on the edge of the bed. “How’s your stomach feeling?” She asked as she brushed her fingers through his hair. “Little better..” he said softly. Sarah just nodded. “I’m glad because we’re going to see Rob, tonight..” she announced, watching as Nick frowned. “It’s only Tuesday?” He said questionably. “I see Rob on Thursday evenings..” Sarah nodded. “Usually, yes..” she told him. “I called him earlier and scheduled an emergency session for this evening..” she said hesitantly, not sure how Nick was going to react. She had debated over whether she should do this earlier, but Nick needed help. He needed more than one, 45 minute therapy session a week. She wasn’t going to just sit back and watch her son fall in to a pit of depression and wallow away. She needed to intervene. She knew Nicky was going to be less than pleased, but sometimes you just had to follow your maternal instincts and that was exactly what she was doing.

Charlie refreshed his messages and sighed, tossing his phone down on the desk in front of him. Tao looked over, “Still no word?” He asked. Charlie shook his head and groaned in frustration. “ Nothing, not a word. I can see he’s read my messages but he hasn’t replied.” He looked up, the teacher at the front was a sub and was paying no attention to the boys huddled at the back. “I’m so worried about him Tao. The court case is coming up and….he’s not coping.” Charlie didn’t want to spill all of Nicks troubles, it wasn’t his decision whether or not to tell their friends about his nightmares. But they all knew he was struggling. They had watched helplessly as Nick withdrew from them in every single way possible.
Isaac chewed his pen thoughtfully, “have you texted his mum? Maybe she could put your mind at rest that he’s ok?” Charlie gave him a small smile, “that’s not a bad idea.” He quickly sent a message to Sarah.

Charlie: Hi Sarah, sorry to bother you, but I just wanted to see if Nick was ok? He isn’t answering my texts and I’m worried.

He pocketed his phone and tried to pay attention to the lesson. A few minutes later he felt the vibration and quietly slipped his phone out to see he had a message from Sarah.

Sarah:you are such a love. He’s home sick today, he had a tricky night I think. I’m taking him for an extra appointment with Rob tonight. Would you like to come over after? About 7pm. I’m sure he’d love to see you.

Charlie sighed with relief. A therapy appointment was a great idea, though the fact Sarah had booked him an emergency one filled him with a sense of unease. He quickly replied to say he’d definitely be over later.

Nick was ushered into the bathroom by his mum who insisted he showered and changed before they left the house. He stood under the warm spray, letting it clear his head slightly. He didn’t want another therapy appointment. He was sick and tired of talking about the trial and what was going to happen. He’d opened up a little to Rob about his nightmares, but nobody knew how terrified he was of giving evidence. He turned off the shower and stood there shivering in the cold before eventually towelling himself dry and putting on some trackies and a hoodie. He brushed his teeth, realising he hadn’t done that all day, and made a small effort to style his hair.
“Nick it’s time to go,” his mum yelled up the stairs. He sighed, opened the bathroom door and went down to join her in the hallway. He laced up his vans, aware that she was staring at him. “I love you Nicky,” she put her hand on his shoulder gently, “I’m so proud of you.” Nick just stared at the floor and shrugged his shoulders. He didn’t understand how she could possibly be proud of him right now.

They arrived on time and had barely sat down in the waiting room when Nick’s name was called. “I’ll wait right here sweetie,” his mum said, kissing his cheek as he stood. He nodded at her and followed the receptionist down the corridor to Rob’s office. The door was open and he knocked on the doorframe. Rob looked up with a kind smile, “Nick, lovely,to see you, come on in.” Nick stepped into the room and made his way to the comfy chair that he always sat in for his appointments. He sat down with a sigh.
“So…..” Rob sat down opposite him, “much as it’s lovely to see you, this isn’t your normal session. Your mum phoned me this morning, she said you didn’t go to school today?” Nick glanced at him before fixing his gaze on the carpet. “Yeah, I had stomach ache.” He mumbled. It sounded so unbelievable he was surprised Rob didn’t burst out laughing. “Right,” Rob said, “and what brought that on do you think?” Nick shrugged again. He really didn’t want to do this. He didn’t want to go over and over everything all over again.
Rob sat back in his chair and waited. Nick focused on the patterns on the carpet. It was a really ugly carpet to be fair, he wondered if Rob had chosen it.
“Ok Nick, this is your session. If you want to sit in silence for the next 45 minutes then we can. If you want to talk about the weather, we can. But I really hope you’ll talk to me about whatever it is that has you missing school with a stomach ache. Maybe I can help make it better?”
Nick opened his mouth, then closed it. He was so torn between wanting to sit in silence so he could go home and hide under his covers, and opening up. Trusting someone with the scary thoughts inside his head.
“I’m scared.” He finally whispered.
“Scared of what?” Rob leaned forward. “Um…. Well you know the trial is coming up, I have to give evidence and I am terrified. I don’t want to face them. What if they don’t get found guilty? What if they come after me? I have nightmares every night, where I’m back there again. I see the men when I close my eyes, I……I feel all the kicks and punches….i hear the words he said to me before he stabbed me. I remember being certain I was going to die.” He felt tears spring to his eyes and he brushed them away angrily. “When I shower or change I’m forced to look at the ugly scars on my body and I hate it. Sometimes……sometimes I think it would have been better to have just not woken up. “ he finally whispered the words that had been plaguing him for weeks now. He was so tired.
Rob handed him a box of tissues. “Nick, you’ve been through the most horrific ordeal, I cannot imagine what that was like for you. It’s only natural you’d be feeling worried about the trial. I’d be concerned if you weren’t. Have you ever heard of PTSD?”
Nick looked up, sniffing, “um, yeah that’s for like war veterans isn’t it?” Rob shook his head, “not at all. It stands for post traumatic stress disorder. And I think what you have been through was definitely traumatic. I believe you have PTSD and I think it would be a good idea for us to start looking into that in our therapy sessions. What do you think?”
Nick sat back and thought. He guessed it made sense. But what difference did it make. Giving it a label wasn’t going to make it go away. But Rob was looking at him with such sincerity he didn’t have the heart to disagree. “ yeah, ok. Sounds good.”
“Ok, great, I’m proud of you for opening up a bit Nick. You’ve given us lots to talk about today so let’s get into it…..”

40 minutes later Nick emerged from the room and returned to Sarah who was still waiting for him. She looked up anxiously, examining his tear stained face as he approached. She opened her arms up and he hugged her back tightly. “Can we go home now,”he whispered. “Of course baby,” Sarah squeezed his arm as she led him to the car. “How did it go?” Nick didn’t want to talk about it. He was exhausted. Rob had asked him so many probing questions, and suggested ways to manage his panic. “It was ok,” he finally replied. A flash of disappointment flickered over Sarah’s face before she concealed it. “Well, let’s go home and have some dinner. Charlie is going to pop round to see you too.” Nicks heart sank. He didn’t have the energy to pretend he was ok in front of Charlie. He had never felt like this before, not wanting to see him. It scared him. “Great,” he said half heartedly.

Dinner was a quiet affair. Nick picked at his plate of pasta, aware of his mums eyes watching him. He forced some down, enough to placate Sarah. He trudged up to his room and under his covers. He was aware of the doorbell going and Nellie barking, then there was a knock on his door. “Nick?” Charlie. He peeked out from under the covers, “hi,” he mumbled. Charlie hesitated at the door. Nick didn’t look good. “Can I come in?” He looked a little scared, which snapped Nick out of his mood. “Yeah of course, sorry…..I was just sleeping.” He sat up and held out his arms for Charlie who quickly rushed over and hugged him back. Charlie tried not to panic at the state of Nick. He looked exhausted. There was no sparkle behind his eyes, he looked flat. “I missed you at school,” he finally said. Nick grimaced, “ yeah sorry, I had stomach ache.” He wondered why he was still spouting that obvious lie to everyone who asked. “I’ll be back tomorrow though,” he added. Charlie grinned at him, “good. Form is so boring without you.” Nick smiled back, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “Want to watch some tv and cuddle?” Charlie asked him. Nick nodded, “ definitely. How long will Jane let you stay?” Charlie sighed, “ only an hour as I have a ton of homework. wanna watch drag race?” Nick loaded it up and leaned back against the pillows, enjoying the rare calm feeling of having Charlie in his arms.
All too soon Charlie had to go home. Nick got ready for bed with a sense of dread. He didn’t want to fall asleep because he knew he’d have another nightmare. His mum came to check on him around 11 as she headed to bed. He closed his eyes and pretended to be asleep. He heard the door click shut and his mum to go his room. Nick flicked his light on. He wasn’t going to sleep tonight.

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This became a bit of a habit for Nick over the next week. He’d pretend everything was okay, during the day. He’d force himself to eat enough dinner at mealtimes to prevent his mother becoming increasingly worried about him and then when she’d gone to bed. He’d turn the lights on his bedroom and just lay there, starting blankly at the wall, torturing himself with his own thoughts until morning rolled around.

PTSD? That’s what Rob, his therapist was saying. That was what his GP was saying. That what they all thought. That’s what his mum thought. He didn’t have PTSD. He wasn’t crazy, but now they were making him see his therapist twice weekly now and the antidepressants that they’d prescribed were doing nothing. They were supposed to make him feel less depressed, were they not?  Not that he was but anything that made him feel any other way than how he was feeling right now was a bonus.  They weren’t helping him at all, if anything, they were making him feel worse.  The trial was tomorrow. The very thought of it made Nick want to throw up.  He stayed home from school again yesterday. Another stomachache. Although, this time, he actually did feel poorly. His stomach was in knots all day, probably to the fact that all he did was think about the trial.  How it was going to go? What was going to happen?  It didn’t matter how many times his representative explained it all to him. What was going to happen step by step. It didn’t help at all. Nick was petrified.

Nick watched the clock on his bedside table flick to 6.30 and turned the alarm off. He was completely exhausted. He had barely closed his eyes all night, too frightened to sleep. He forced himself up and into the shower. His brain felt fuzzy, like he was outside of his own body watching as he showered, changed and shaved. He went downstairs on autopilot and grabbed a glass of juice. Sarah looked up as he entered, her heart sinking as she took in the sight. He looked awful. Bags under his eyes, so pale and somehow he looked so small. “Morning Nicky,” she said carefully. “What can I get you?” Nick looked up and tried to smile. “Oh, I’m not that hungry, I’ll take a cereal bar with me.” He grabbed one from the cupboard and put it in his pocket. Sarah watched him gather his school belongings and put on his shoes and coat. “You sure you are ok to go back today darling?” Nick looked up, seeing her concerned face. “Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks mum. See you later.” He shouldered his bag and made his way out the house.
He began walking to school. Still feeling like he was hovering somewhere above his body, watching. As he neared the school he was aware of the noise, the hustle and bustle of all the teenagers making their way to school. He felt panic setting in inside him. The thought of going in the building, having to see his friends, talk to them, act normal and make it through the day. He couldn’t do it. Listen to them talking about the trial tomorrow, asking him questions. He couldn’t do any of it. He needed to get away. He couldn’t face Charlie’s concerned expression. He was broken, there was no fixing him. He couldn’t do the trial. He couldn’t do any of it.
Nicks footsteps quickened as he walked past the entrance to Truham. He didn’t know where he was going, he didn’t know what he was doing but he knew he needed to keep walking. Away from the noise, away from the people. Away from the trial. He zipped his coat up, put his hands in his pockets and walked away. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He saw a notification from Charlie, and without reading it he switched his phone off.
He kept walking.

Chapter Text

Charlie couldn’t keep his gaze away from the closed classroom door for the entirety of the lesson. He waited for Nick to bounce through it. He never did. Where was he? He’d been absent yesterday as well. Was he poorly? Was it because the trial was tomorrow. Charlie was feeling immense anticipation and fear of the day that was looming over them. He was going to have to come face to face with the men that targeted him and Nick. The men that teased and taunted them for expressing their love. Then men that brutally beat up his boyfriend, stabbed him and left him for dead. Surely the jury would see right through their pathetic pleas that they were innocent. They did this. They made those choices that night and they would just have to live with it. Just like Nick had to live with it. Charlie feared that his boyfriend would never be the same as he was before the attack. Not that it mattered to Charlie. He loved every inch of Nick. No matter what.

Charlie sighed when form ended and Nick was a no show. Maybe he really was poorly? Or was he just avoiding him? He knew Nick was embarrassed over his nightmare episode the other night, he shouldn’t be. What happened to him was enough to traumatise anyone. He just wished Nick would talk to him. Nick wasn’t talking to anyone, not even Sarah. Charlie wasn’t too surprised to see that his message he sent before form had gone unread. Nick hadn’t been reading or responding to his messages for a while now. Not just him. He hadn’t replied to their friends. Even Tori had tried to reach out to him but had been completely shut out too.

The school day passed by slowly. Charlie kept checking his phone whenever the teacher wasn’t looking. He sent more texts to Nick. None of them even delivered so his phone must be switched off. He hoped he was resting at home, finally getting some sleep. Lunch time rolled around and Tao, Isaac and Charlie gathered together at the picnic benches.
“Still no word on Nick?” Isaac looked worried as he rummaged in his bag for his lunch. Charlie sighed and shook his head. “Nope, nothing. His phone is switched off. Maybe he’s finally getting some sleep.” They ate quietly for a moment before being interrupted by the loud, raucous rugby group who were passing by their table, throwing a ball to each other and shouting friendly insults.
“Hey, Charlie, where’s Nick?” Sai stopped by their table clutching the rugby ball. “Is he off school again?” He looked concerned. The rugby lads had been good friends to Nick after the attack, but he’d withdrawn from them in the same way he had from the Paris squad. Texts went unanswered, invites declined. They were worried about him too. “Um, yeah, he’s at home today.” Charlie replied, not wanting to admit to them that Nick had stopped speaking to him too. “Well, tell him we miss him at rugby ok?” Sai squeezed Charlie’s shoulder then threw the ball at Harry and the group carried on their chaotic way.
Charlie slumped back down on the bench. Should he text Sarah? No, he didn’t want to be over bearing. He’d stop by Nicks after rugby practise and see how he is.

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Sarah dried her hands on the kitchen towel as she finished washing up. She’d made lasagne for dinner, one of Nicks favourite foods. It was warming in the oven ready for him after rugby. She sat down at the table and sighed. The next few days were going to be really difficult for Nick. The trial had brought everything up again and she knew he wasn’t coping. Her only hope was that the thugs would be sent to jail and Nick could begin to heal once the trial was over. They just needed to get through it. A knock at the door startled her. She glanced at the clock. 5.15…Nick must have forgotten his keys. She walked over to the front door and opened it, “Did you forget your……” she trailed off as she saw Charlie stood at the door in his rugby kit. “Oh, Charlie, hello.” She opened the door wider to let him in, looking behind him for Nick. “Um, is Nick being a slow walker?” She made eye contact with him, her heart beginning to pound as she saw his eyes widen in panic. “Charlie? Where’s Nick?”
Charlie opened his mouth to reply but felt panic squeezing his throat closed. Why didn’t Sarah know where Nick was? “Um, he wasn’t at school today. I thought…..I thought he was off again? I came by to see how he is?” He watched the colour drain out of Sarah’s face as she led him into the kitchen. “He went to school this morning,” she whispered. “He didn’t get there?” Charlie shook his head, “I messaged him but he didn’t answer.” He watched as Sarah grabbed her phone and dialled his number. “His phone is switched off,” she said, her voice trembling. “Oh my god. Where has he gone?”
Charlie felt like the room was spinning. Nick was missing? He should have text Sarah at lunch time. He could kick himself for leaving it. He should have known Nick would never normally switch his phone off. He followed Sarah upstairs to Nicks room. It was empty, his bed unmade. Sarah glanced in his wardrobe looking to see if he’d taken anything with him. All his clothes were still there as normal. She checked his bedside table. His anti depressants were on the table. She picked them up, her heart sinking as she realised the bottle was far too full. He hadn’t been taking his medication. She looked at the packaging. There were at least a weeks worth that should have been used by now. “Oh god,” she sat down on his bed and put her head in her hands. Where was her baby? “School didn’t phone you?” Charlie asked, trying to wrap his head around the fact that his boyfriend had been missing all day and nobody knew.
“No,” she sighed, “he’s college age now, I don’t think they are as strict with attendance.”
Charlie sat down next to her. “What do we do?” Sarah rubbed the tears from her eyes, she didn’t have time to fall apart now. They needed to find Nick. He’d been out on his own all day, it was dark and cold and he wasn’t taking his medication. She dialled 999. Charlie tried to hold back his panic as he listened to her.
“Hello, yes my son is missing…….he’s 17……no I know but there are special circumstances…..” she proceeded to tell the operator about Nick being off his medication and the trial being tomorrow. She eventually hung up. “They are sending a police officer.” Charlie nodded. This was serious. He didn’t want to just sit around waiting. “Shall we go looking for him? I can get some friends together?” Sarah smiled and patted his knee. “That’s a great idea. Let’s see what the officer says first though.”
They made their way downstairs. Sarah turned off the oven and made some tea for herself and Charlie with enough in the pot for the police officers. They arrived quickly, obviously concerned.
Sarah and Charlie sat at the kitchen table with the two police officers. Sarah had filled them in on all the background history with Nick. She’d shared a recent photo with them. “I’m going to have all the officers on the look out for him. We are taking this seriously Ms Nelson. Do you have any ideas where he might go?”
Sarah looked at Charlie desperately. Charlie thought of all the places they liked to hang out. “The park? Or maybe the arcade? Places he likes to walk Nellie?” The officers smiled, jotting it all down. “What about other friends? Can you call around and see if he’s gone to one of them?” Sarah nodded. “Of course. I don’t think he has though. If he’s not with Charlie……”she stopped. Her voice trembling. She knew that if he hadn’t gone to Charlie, he wouldn’t have gone to any of his friends. But she agreed to try. “Can we go out looking for him?” The officers nodded. “Of course, just have your phone at all times and maybe someone at home in case he turns up.”

Charlie opened up his phone and created a group chat with the Paris squad, Otis, Sai and Chris.

Hi guys. Emergency situation. Nick is missing. 🙁 He didn’t go to school today but he left for school as normal. We are really worried about him. His mental health isn’t great with the trial tomorrow. We need to find him. Anyone able to help in the search come to his house now. The police are looking for him.

He watched as the group was flooded with messages from concerned friends, all saying they were on their way. Charlie’s heart was warmed with how much they all loved Nick.

Tara: missing??? 😳 Oh my god. Me and Darcy are on our way
Sai: oh fuck. I’ll get my mum to drop me over. She’ll want to see Sarah.
Christian:I’m on my way. Otis I’ll pick you up
Otis: thanks. We’ll find him Charlie.
Elle: oh my god this is awful. I’ll be over as quickly as I can.
Isaac: I’m coming now.
Tao: me too. Hang tight Charlie.

Charlie looked up as Sarah was letting the officers out the front door. “His friends are on their way. They want to help.” Sarah smiled softly. He was lucky to have so many people to care about him. Sarah wanted to phone Di, to get her to come but she was on holiday in America. She didn’t want to worry her just yet. She knew she’d come straight home if she asked. But they needed the break they’d been looking forward to the holiday all year.

The next few minutes were spent greeting everyone. Charlie was bundled into lots of hugs, filled with promises, “we’ll find him,” “he’ll be ok,” “try not to worry.”
Sai’s mum immediately pulled Sarah into a hug. Charlie was glad she had someone to support her. “Sarah, I’m so sorry to hear about Nick.” She hugged her tight, allowing Sarah a few moments to just be still and process everything. Eventually she pulled away. “Thank you,” she said gratefully. She looked around the living room at all the people here to help. “Thank you all for coming. Um, I think it’s best we split into groups and search different places. Someone needs to stay here in case Nick comes home.” Sai’s mum volunteered quickly, knowing Sarah wouldn’t be able to just sit at home.
It was decided that Sarah and Charlie would go to the park, Elle, Tao and Isaac the arcade, Sai Chris and Otis the town centre and Tara and Darcy near Truham. Everyone checked their phones had charge and agreed to keep in touch. Charlie added Sarah and Sai’s mum to the group chat so they could all keep each other up to date.
The house emptied as each group made they way across town searching for Nick.

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Nick hugged his thin jacket closer to his body as he walked. It was cold. No, it was freezing.  Why didn’t you grab a warm coat, this morning, idiot. He thought to himself as he walked through the park, the crisp ground, crunching beneath his feet. It was the end of February. No wonder it was so cold.  Nick didn’t know what time it was. His phone was off and he wasn’t wearing a watch, but he knew school would be well underway by now. Would anyone notice he wasn’t there?  Charlie would. His friends would. He knew that was a given, but he was 17 now. He was sixthform. Attendance was more relaxed in the upper years. So as far as Sarah was concerned. He was at school. He just couldn’t face it today. Not with the trial beginning tomorrow. The last couple of weeks have been bad enough. He’s been the centre of all conversation topics at school and he gas hated every single second of it. He couldn’t go through one class without someone mentioning the attack and the trial. Was he nervous about standing up in court?  Was he going to see his attackers face to face.  What would he do if they were found not guilty. All the same questions that he had been relentlessly asking himself. No. Torturing himself with. He didn’t know how it was going to go. He didn’t know what was going to happen but he was so fucking scared.  He didn’t want to relive that night. Wasn’t it bad enough that he had to go through it again and again, night after night in his dreams? No. They weren’t dreams. Dreams were nice and comforting. They were nightmares. Horrible. Awful nightmares that felt so real every single time. Now, he was going to have to stand up in a courtroom full of strangers and tell them what happened. Would anyone believe him? He was just a kid. Who was going to believe a seventeen year old kid over four fully grown men.

Nick sighed as he came to a stop at the little swing set in the park. There was no one around giving it was late morning, mid week and everyone else was at school or work.  Nick liked the park. He’d always come here when he just needed space. Space to think things over or to just be on his own for a little while.  He collapsed on to one of the swings, dropping his bag on to the ground, leaning back and looking up at the sky as he slowly started to rock himself back and forth.  He used to come here a lot, more so when he was younger.  He’d spent many hours on this swing set. The park became sort of an escape for him especially when he was upset after a fight with David or disappointed that Stéphane had let him down again, broken yet another promise. Failed to visit when he said he was going to or sent a birthday card in the post rather than actually making the effort to see him in person.  Nick took a deep breath out. He knew he shouldn’t be thinking about his dad. Stéphane had made it clear where his priorities lay when he had briefly visited him at the hospital following the attack. Oh Nicholas come on. There must be a reason. His father’s voice screamed at him.  You must’ve done something to provoke it. That statement from his father was permanently burned in Nick’s memory. How could his own dad say that to him? Insinuate that he had done something to initiate his attack. That he had asked for it? Then for Stéphane to reply outraged that Nick told him they reason they were attacked was because he was holding Charlie’s hand. Holding his boyfriends hand. Maybe it is not the smartest of ideas to flaunt what you are in front of strangers.   Nick blinked back some tears as all those memories clouded his mind. Would Stéphane turn up tomorrow.  Nick didn’t want him there, he had meant what he had said back at the hospital. He didn’t want his father to be involved in his life, anymore. Sarah was in agreement with him. She would support Nick’s decisions.  David, on the other hand. David was deluded. At 21 years old, he still believed that his father had it in him to change, to become the dad that they both deserve. That wasn’t possible. David had informed Stéphane of the court dates, he was hopeful that their dad would be there. Nick didn’t care.

The last few months for Nick had been a complete whirlwind of emotions.  Waking up in hospital, releasing he had under gone two life saving surgeries. Remembering the attack, seeing his injuries for the first time, physiotherapy, being discharged from hospital, the nightmares, trying to get his life back on track. Therapy. Therapy was a big one for Nick.  He had been so adamant that he didn’t need it. The very suggestion was ridiculous. It had taken both Sarah and Charlie a lot of persuasion to get Nick to agree to give it ago. He was glad he had made that decision. Rob had helped him a lot. Therapy had been somewhere that he could express what he was feeling, get it all off his chest without the worry of becoming a burden to his mother or boyfriend. Rob didn’t judge him. Rob didn’t pressure him. Rob just listened. It had helped for weeks, that was until Nick got the letter through with the trial dates. He began closing up. He wouldn’t even let Rob in anymore.  The only way to explain what nick was feeling right now was being trapped in a room with no windows and no doors. Trapped in a small space with no way out. That was exactly what Nick was feeling and he didn’t know how to make it stop. He didn’t know how to stop feeling this way, so instead he just pushed everyone round him away. Everyone that was trying to help him.

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Charlie’s mind was reeling. He couldn’t believe that Nick was missing. He had a bad feeling when Nick failed to turn up for form that morning. It was so unlike Nick not to come to school. Well the was a bit of a lie. It was unlike the old Nick. Nick hadn’t been the same since the attack, but more so in the last few weeks. He couldn’t be further away from himself if he tried.  Why didn’t Charlie message Sarah as soon as he discovered Nick was absent from school? Why didn’t he inform her when he realised that Nick’s phone was turned off. That was a red flag right there, Nick NEVER turned his phone off. Unless he ran out of charge but then he would charge it almost instantly that it would come straight back on. Charlie had felt a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach as soon as the call had went straight to Nick’s voicemail. Something wasn’t right. Charlie just sighed he should have acted on it straight away.  Coach Singh had asked him where Nick was when he had failed to show up at practice that afternoon. Before the attack. Nick had barely missed a practice apart from the time he was so poorly with a fever of 40 and Sarah had rushed him to urgent care. Since the attack though, Nick had missed countless rugby practices and numerous days at school. The penny had finally dropped when he arrived at the Nelson house after Rugby to check on Nick. Sarah had been surprised to see him, her surprise quickly changed to worry and shock when she discovered Charlie was alone. Where was Nick?  Charle was horrified to find out that his boyfriend was missing. Nick had left the house just after 8am that morning. It was now almost 7pm and nobody had seen him. Nobody knew his whereabouts or if he was okay?  Nick isn’t Ok. Nick hasn’t been okay for weeks. They had to find him. Why wasnt he taking his medication? Why hadn’t he spoken to him about it. Charle felt guilty. He didn’t want to make this about him but he also couldn’t help but feel slightly hurt that his boyfriend hadn’t confided in him.

“We will find him, Charlie.”  That was Sarahs voice. So gentle and caring and surprisingly calm considering her son was being treated as a missing person. Charlie was surprised at how calm and collected Sarah was coming across although he could sense she was a mess inside. Her child was god knows where. His mental state wasn’t great. It was freezing cold outside. He had left the house that morning wearing a thin jacket, with a rolled up hoodie in his schoolbag. It was far too cold not to be wearing a thick coat. It was dark, the street lamps had come on. Where was Nick?    “I’m so sorry..” Charlie said softly as they approached the gates of the park.  This was one of Nick’s favourite places. He enjoyed just hanging out here with his friends or waking Nellie here.  Sarah huddled her coat closer to herself as she shoved her hands in her pockets for warmth. She stopped in her tracks and glanced at Charlie. Why was he apologising? He had absolutely nothing to be sorry about. Neither one of them could have predicted that Nick was just going to take off like this. God.She felt immense guilt.  She had wanted to drive Nick to school this morning. He had been insistent on walking even though she assured him that it was no trouble seeing as she wasn’t working today. Why had she let Nick talk her out of it? She should have been firm and stuck to her guns, dropping him off at the school gates but then again who was to say Nicky wouldn’t have just made a run for it the moment her car was out of sight.

“No, darling.’ She told Charlie softly.  ‘This is nobody’s fault. Nicky….he just isn’t in a great place right now.”  She sighed. How hadn’t she spotted this sooner? She was Nick’s mum for crying out loud. Yeah she was fully aware Nick wasn’t coping. He wasn’t coping before his PTSD diagnosis and he definitely was not coping now. Skipping school, not talking to his friends, not talking to Charlie. Christ, he wouldn’t even talk to her anymore. The nightmares, barely eating, barely spending any time with Nellie anymore. It was just not like Nicky. Her little boy was broken beyond repair. He needed help, but he needed to accept the help. He needed to just stop pushing people away but that was easier said than done. They just had to find him and get through the trial and then they could start to get the old Nick back.  The scoured the park. Nick wasn’t at the swings, he wasn’t at his and Charlies log. Charlie had thought that he might be there, but he wasn’t. They began walking Nick’s usual route that he would take nellie when walking her in the park.  “Nick?”  Charlie called out in to thin air.   “Nicky?” Sarah called. Loudly. Where was her son?    After 45 minutes of searching every inch of the park. It became apparent to them that Nick was not here.

Sai, Otis and Christian arrived at the shopping centre, accompanied by one of the police officers. They headed straight to the cinema. They searched the lobby for Nick. They then asked behind the ticket desk if anyone has seen Nick, showing the workers a recent picture of their friend. The worker wasn’t very compliant until the officer stepped in, explaining how it was a police matter and very vital that they found Nick. The worker allowed the officer access to the CCTV camera’s. No luck. Nick wasn’t there, nor had been there all day.   “I was so sure he’d be here.” Otis sighed.  “Nick loves the cinema.”   “Used to.” Sai sighed. “Nick doesn’t love anything no more.”  He just wanted his mate back. He wanted the old, carefree, funny, mischievous Nick Nelson back. They all did.    “We haven’t checked the food court yet..” Christian piped up. “He might’ve just gone for some pizza or something.”    Otis glanced at his friend and then at the officer who had agreed that wasn’t a bad shout. They were prepared to look everywhere at this point.

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Nick walked and walked and walked. He had no idea what time it was now. He knew it was getting late though as it was dark and the street lights had turned on. It was so much colder now, too. He shuddered as he pulled his hood up. He didn’t really know where he was intending on going. He just knew he didn’t want to go home. He didn’t want to face a thousand questions from his mum. Where was he? Why was his phone off? Why did he skip school?  In all honestly? He didn’t have any idea.  He didn’t want to have to deal with David. He knew his brother was driving up from Glasgow and would be arriving sometime this evening. Nick had voiced that he didn’t want David at the trial. He knew his brother only cared and wanted to support him, but in all honestly. He didn’t want his brother seeing him so broken, so vulnerable. He knew he wouldn’t be able to hold it together tomorrow In court. He knew he was going to crumble. It was just a matter of time. He wasn’t going. There. He had made the harsh decision there and then. He wasn’t going to turn up for court. Wait. Could he even do that? Or was he legally required to turn up. He didn’t know. He didn’t care, for that matter.  He just wanted it to go away. Where was Aladdin and his magic lamp when you needed him, eh? If only Nick could squeeze his eyes so tightly and when he opened them. This would all be over. The attack would never have happened. If only things were that simple.   Nick had spent his day, aimlessly walking around. He’d visited the park, he’d taken a bus in to town, walked some more, gotten a bus back to Truham, spent an hour in the arcade. Just sitting around, watching as people played the arcade games, bowled. Had a good time. If only he could remember what it felt like to smile? To laugh.  He felt nothing these days. He just felt empty. He didn’t like feeling like this. He didn’t want to feel like this anymore. He wanted to stop feeling anything, to be honest. It just hurt too much. Feeling so helpless and pointless.  That’s what those bastards have done to him. He wished he’d never woken up after the attack. Anything has to be better than feeling like this.  Nick walked down the street that lead away from the arcade.  His stomach rumbled. He wasnt hungry but his stomach begged to differ. He reached into his trouser pocket. He had enough for a bag of chips. He may as well eat something. He wasn’t planning on going home anytime soon. He stepped into the chip shop and ordered a small bag of chips, paid for them and waited for them to be ready. It wasn’t until the lady behind the counter was salting his chips that he realised that this was the same chip shop that he and Charlie had come in to that night.  The night he was attacked. Nick ignored the strange looks as he backed away, towards the door, eyes wide. He was breathing heavy. “Your chips are just about ready, pet…”  Nick felt like the world was spinning around him, his ears felt fuzzy, everything was muffled and he felt like his heart was about to beat right through his chest. He had to get out of here. He had to get out of here right now. His left felt like jelly.  “Are you okay, pet?”  Nick spun around on his heels and legged it out of the door and down the road leaving his chips behind and half a dozen pairs of confused and concerned eyes.  Nick ran as fast as his legs would take him, he wasn’t even paying attention to what direction he was running in. He ran and ran until he couldn’t anymore. He collapsed against a wall, sliding down on to his bottom so that his back was right up against the wall. He was hyperventilating. He tried to remember what Rob had told him to do when he felt like he was having a panic attack. He tried to steady his breathing. He felt like his chest was on fire. He couldn’t breathe. His whole body was trembling. He glanced up. He didn’t even know where he was. He glanced over the road where there was a signpost. Byers Road. He felt his body go rigid.  This was the same street they were on that night. This was the street those men cornered him and Charlie, beat him to a pulp and stabbed him, leaving him for dead. Nick let out a shaky breath. He didn’t want to be alone anymore.  He wanted Charlie. He wanted his mum.

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Elle, Tao and Isaac exited the arcade, feeling deflated.  Tao had been so sure that Nick would be there.  It was one of his favourite places to go. He loved just spending hours playing arcade games or challenging his friends at bowling. He also believed that they did the best chips to ever exist.  Tao begged to differ.  “He’s not at the park either.”  Elle sighed, as she read Charlie’s text.   “Otis just messaged. He’s not at the cinema either.”  Tao sighed.  “Where else could he be?” Issac sighed. They were running out of ideas and it was getting late. They had to find Nick. He had been on his own all day.   “Maybe he was here?” Elle suggested. “He might have just left already. Why don’t we just walk around for a bit…before we just give up.” She said.  Tao and Isaac nodded in agreement. It was worth a shot. They’d do anything to try and find their friend who clearly was very vulnerable and not in the right frame of mind right now.   “I can’t believe we didn’t notice he’d stopped taking his medication.” Issac sighed.  “He obviously went to great effort to make sure we didn’t find out.” Tao sighed. He should have noticed it earlier. He should have spotted it. He was usually quite good at figuring people out.  Nick was clearly just good at hiding it.    “What if we don’t find him tonight?” Issac asked. Asking the question that nobody wanted to hear but it was almost 8pm.  What if they didn’t find Nick this evening? What would that mean?  He was due in court at 10am tomorrow.   “We can’t think like that.” Tao replied.  “We will find him!!” He said confidently. They weren’t going to give up.  “We promised Sarah we would get him home tonight..”. Elle glanced at her boyfriend, squeezing his hand as she wrapped her coat around herself. It was so cold. Nick must be freezing. They walked in the same direction for around 10 minutes.  “Guys, wait.” Issac said as he noticed a hooded figure, sitting against a wall, at the end of the road. Elle and Tao glanced up. It couldn’t be? Could it? They picked up their pace.  “It is.” Ellie said as they got closer. She could tell it was Nick by his hoody and his shoes. She’d been with Nick when he’d gotten those shoes. He’d been in a humph when Sarah had told him he needed new school shoes as his other ones had been falling apart.  She’d sent him to the shop with £50 and strict instructions that he better come home with decent school shoes. Elle had helped him pick them out. Nick didn’t even move an inch as they approached him, apart from the way he was shivering from the cold.  “Nick?” Elle said softly. She didn’t want to startle him.

Nick heard a quiet voice from above him. He tucked his head further into his hood and made himself as small as possible. The panic that had invaded him at the fish and chip shop had gone and he felt cold, numb and so very tired. He could make out two, possibly three voices but was too stuck inside his own thoughts to work out who was talking.
Elle glanced up at Tao and Isaac worriedly. “I don’t want to scare him,” she whispered. “Phone Charlie and Sarah, they will know what to do.” She took off her coat and gently draped it over Nick’s shoulders. Tao quickly dialled Charlie’s number.
“Charlie, we’ve found him.” He spoke quietly a few paces away from Nick.
“Oh thank god, Sarah Taos found him.” Tao could hear Sarah’s cry of relief. “Where are you guys? Is he ok?” Tao swallowed and took a breath before replying. “We found him just on Bridge street, he seems really out of it. He’s sitting against the wall and he’s not registered that we are here. We don’t want to make things worse…..”
He stopped as he heard the sharp intake of breath from Charlie. “Charlie? What’s wrong.” He listened as Charlie spoke to Sarah. “Hes on bridge street……” Charlie felt tears in his eyes, “he’s where the assault took place Tao, that’s right where it happened.”
“Oh shit,” Tao whispered. He’d not registered that. No wonder Nick was in such a state. “Get here quickly Charlie. I’ll phone the police and let them know we have found him.”
Charlie and Sarah hurried to her car and sped quickly to Bridge Street. “Why would he go there?” Charlie cried to Sarah, “I don’t understand. We’ve not been down that road once since it happened. He always avoids going down that road even if it’s the quickest route.” Sarah sighed, “I don’t know darling, but the main thing is we’ve found him, we can get him home safe and sound.” The journey passed quickly, they weren’t far. Soon they turned into the road and saw Tao and Isaac waving them down. They quickly got out the car and hurried over to Nick. Sarah’s heart broke at the sight of her boy sitting, shivering on the cold ground wrapped in Elles coat. She approached him slowly and carefully.
“Nicky? It’s me, it’s mum. I’m here sweetheart.” She gently touched his shoulders.
Nick heard a voice coming through the noise in his head. “Nicky, can you hear me darling?” His mum was here. She’d found him. He slowly brought his tear stained face up from where it was hidden and opened his eyes. His mums kind face was looking down at him.
“Mum?” He whispered, then burst into tears. She immediately wrapped her arms around him and let him cry, holding him tight as he shook. Charlie watched on, his heart shattered at the sight of his defeated boyfriend. He turned round at the sound of another car approaching. The police had arrived. Thankfully they kept their distance, realising how fragile Nicks emotional state was. Sarah looked up, shaking her head at their questioning faces. She wasn’t going to leave her boy to speak to them. The police officers spoke to Tao. “You found him here?” Tao nodded. “He was just sitting on the floor all hunched up, it was Elle who recognised him.” The officers smiled at her, “you’ve done brilliantly, thank you. We can take it from here.” His tone was firm and left no room for arguing. “Charlie call us yeah and tell us what’s going on?” Charlie nodded. As the friends turned to leave an ambulance arrived, “what’s that for?” Charlie asked. “He’s not hurt.” The officers smiled sympathetically. “ we just want them to check him out, make sure he’s not a threat to himself or that he’s got hypothermia from the cold or anything, it’s just routine.”
The paramedics went over to Nick and Sarah. Sarah’s eyes widened as they approached. “Hello there, I’m Sam and this is Meg, can we have a quick chat with you both?” Sarah rubbed nicks shoulders and tried to get him to let go slightly. “Nicky, the paramedics need to check you over darling.” Nicky burrowed further into his mums shoulder, his sobs increasing once more. His breathing was becoming erratic and panic was setting in again. “I think we need to give him something to calm him down, do we know what’s got him so distressed?”
Sarah nodded. “Nicky was attacked very badly a few months ago. He was stabbed and beaten, right here on this street. The trial against the scumbags who did this starts tomorrow. He has been missing all day, out in this cold without a coat.” The paramedics spoke quietly to each other and Meg jogged back to the ambulance, returning with a foil blanket which she draped over him. “I’d like to give him a mild sedative. It won’t knock him out, just calm him down a bit, is that ok with you mum?” Sarah gave her consent, seeing Nick so distressed was breaking her heart.
Meg injected Nick and almost instantly he relaxed against Sarah. The sobs decreased and his breathing began to return to normal.
“Ok Nick, let’s get you in the back of the ambulance just to check you over. It’s more comfy than the floor I promise.” Nick allowed himself to be helped up and he walked up into the back of the van. He felt floaty, the panic was gone. He saw Charlie looking over at him with tears in his eyes. He held out his hand and Charlie grasped it tight.
The paramedics cleared him to go home to rest and Charlie led Nick to Sarah’s car. They climbed into the back, Charlie not letting go of Nick for a second. “I’m sorry,” Nick said quietly as they cuddled together. “Whatever for?” Charlie looked at him. Nick sighed, he was finding it hard to gather his thoughts, he was so tired. “I should have answered your texts. I shouldn’t have run off, I just……I just can’t cope with this,” he finally said what had been going through his mind all day. “I’m so scared about tomorrow Char.”
Charlie wished he could make all this go away. He wished Nick didn’t have to give evidence, but he knew that Nick would regret it for the rest of his life if he didn’t do everything in his power to get these men sent down. So he squeezed him tight, “I know you are scared. I’m scared too. We can do this Nick. You are so much braver and stronger than you think. Let’s just get you home yeah?” Nick nodded as his mum got in the car, “you doing ok baby?” She looked at him with such love. He nodded again, closing his eyes and leaning on Charlie. Sarah and Charlie exchanged worried glances. “Ok,” Sarah said, “ let’s go home, you must be starving.”

When they got back to the Nelson house Sarah encouraged Nick to have a hot shower to warm him up. Charlie followed him upstairs, reluctant to leave him alone “I’ll wait out here for you babe,” he gestured to the hallway. Nick chewed his lip, before saying, “can you come in? I don’t want to be on my own.” He sounded so small, Charlie felt his heart squeeze. “Of course I will.” He followed Nick into the bathroom, busying himself by switching on the shower and locating the clean towels while Nick stood, looking lost in the middle of the bathroom. Charlie helped him to take off his hoodie and shirt. His breath catching at the two scars on Nicks chest. The permanent reminder of what he had been through. He traced them gently with his fingers, Nick watching him. “I hate them,” he admitted, “it’s like I am never allowed to forget what happened. Whenever I take off my shirt I can see them. So ugly.”
Charlie leaned in and kissed Nick gently on the lips. “ there is nothing ugly about you Nicholas. You don’t think my scars are ugly do you?” Nicks eyes widened, “of course not. I’d never think that Charlie…..” he stopped, realising what Charlie was trying to say. “Exactly.” Charlie said. “Your scars show you are a survivor Nick. I could never hate them.” Nick smiled at him softly, then turned around to finish changing, Charlie looked away, this was not the time to see his boyfriend naked for the first time. He waited until he heard the shower door close before sitting down on the closed toilet seat. “You mum has made lasagne,” he called through to him, “are you hungry?”
Nick smiled as he stood under the hot spray, letting it warm him, “yeah I think I am. I was trying to buy some chips earlier but then I realised I’d ended up at the chip shop from that night and I just…..panicked.” Charlie murmured in understanding. They had used a different chippy since that night, neither one wanting to be anywhere near the scene of the assault. He waited patiently as Nick warmed up, then changed into comfy clothes.
They went downstairs hand in hand to the kitchen where Sarah was plating up the lasagne from earlier. Sai’s mum had left, having helped Sarah get the dinner heated up. “You look better,” Sarah greeted Nick with another hug. “Yeah,” he sighed. “The shower helped, and whatever the paramedics gave me,” he chuckled weakly. Sarah smiled at him. “Let’s eat in the lounge and watch tv,” she suggested. Nick agreed and they took their plates through, Charlie and Nick settling down on the sofa, Sarah in the comfy armchair. Sarah flicked through the tv channels, settling on an old episode of bake off. The three ate quietly, Nick realising he was ravenous, finished his quickly.

Eventually they were all finished. Sarah turned to Nick, “Nicky baby, we need to talk about what happened today. We were all so worried about you.” Charlie gripped his hand. “I’m sorry,” he whispered his eyes filling with tears. Sarah was out of her seat in an instant sat by his their side. She held his other hand tight.”no baby. You don’t need to be sorry. I’m not cross. But we need to talk. The trial is tomorrow…..”
“I don’t want to do it.” He said quietly. “I’m so scared mum.”

““oh baby, I know…” Sarah cooed as she sat down beside him, putting her arm around his shoulder. As his mother, it was completely crushing her heart to see her son so vulnerable, so broken. Knowing there was very little she could do to make it better for him. Nick rested his head on his mum’s shoulder. “What…what if they get away with it?” He asked, his voice small and quiet. That had been all he had been able to think about for weeks. He honestly didn’t know if he would be able to cope if his attackers were found not guilty. Knowing that they were out there and could come after him at any time. He would feel permanently trapped. Permanently petrified to leave the house. “They won’t , darling.” Sarah told him as she brushed her fingers through his hair, something she hadn’t done properly since he was a little boy. The very thought of her baby hurting and her not being able to do anything to help was torturing her. She just desperately wanted this to all be over. She wanted those beasts to be locked away for a very long time for what they have done to her Nicky. Charlie watched them. How could Sarah be so sure? He knew the evidence was stacking up in their favour. 2/4 men had already confessed their involvement and he was almost certain that the jury would side with his and Nick’s version of events but there was the very small chance of them getting away with it and that scared Charlie immensely. He watched how Nick clinged to his mother, like a baby cub, desperately holding on to its mother for protection. He hesitated for moment. Maybe he should leave? Sarah quite clearly had things under control here. Nick was still evidently distressed and upset but he had calmed somewhat since they got home. “Maybe I should get off..” Charlie said softly as he sat his mug of tea on the table. Nick’s head instantly snapped up off of his mother’s shoulder, his eyes widening in horror. “No!!” He said adamantly. He then glanced at Charlie. His eyes begging him not to leave. “I don’t want you to go..” he said as he adapted a quiet tone. “Please…” he said desperately. Charlie felt his heart ache at his boyfriend practically begging him not leave. There was no way he was going to after that. He reached out for Nick’s hand, giving it a tight squeeze. “I’m not going anywhere, love.” He promised. “I’ll stay the night if that’s what you want..” he said, letting out a sign of relief as Nick eagerly nodded his head, a confirmation that was what he wanted. Charlie then sheepishly glanced at Sarah. “Only if it’s okay with your mum, though.” He said. He’d never over stay his welcome. He’d always ask Sarah’s approval before he slept over. “Oh darling, of course it’s okay.” Sarah gushed as she reached over Nick’s lap and gently squeezed Charlie’s hand. She then glanced at the empty mugs on the coffee table before gathering them up. “I’ll make us another cuppa, shall I?” There was still a lot that she wanted to talk to her son about so she decided that it was probably better to do it over a warm cup of tea and a sleeve of custard creams.

Charlie wrapped his arm around his boyfriend’s shoulders, watching as Nick automatically lay his head on his chest. Charlie instantly ran his hand through Nick’s hair. He had been so scared earlier when he had realised he was missing. The very thought of his boyfriend being out in the dark and cold, alone, upset and scared completely broke his heart. “I was so worried about you…” Charlie said softly as he wrapped his fingers around his boyfriend’s soft hair. “You scared me..”. “I’m sorry…” Nick mumbled. “I…I don’t know what I was thinking…” he then paused before continue. “I don’t think I was thinking at all, to be honest.” His brain had been foggy all day, he doesn’t know what actually possessed him to run off like that. He just felt like he needed to get away. He felt stressed and overwhelmed and his brain had felt like
It was going to burst. His thoughts had gotten louder and louder and then just nothing. Quiet. Calm.

That was until he stumbled across the chippy and it all came flooding back. “No ‘S’ word.” Charlie told him firmly. “I’m just glad you’re okay. I thought you were hurt.” Nick glanced at Charlie with a guilty expression on his face. “I didn’t mean to scare you.” He said softly, his gaze shifting as Sarah re-entered the room carrying a tray of tea and biscuits. “Either of you…” Nick said glancing at his mum. He must’ve put her through hell today. Actually, not just today. The last few months couldn’t have been easy for her either. “Oh darling, you don’t have to apologise.” Sarah said as she sat back down beside him again. “You just have to promise me that you’ll never do anything like this again, okay?” She never wanted to feel fear like that again. Her son being missing and her not knowing where he was or even if he was alright. “I was so frightened, Nicky..” Sarah admitted as she lifted one of the mugs of warm tea into her hands and passed it over to her youngest son. “I just wanted it to stop…” Nick whispered in a small voice. Sarah frowned. “Wanted what to stop, sweetheart?” “Everything…” Nick replied as the tears threatened to fall once again. He hadn’t spoke to anyone about what had really been going on in his head. Not even Rob. “I just want it to stop, mum.” He sobbed as tears rolled down his face. “Oh baby..” Sarah choked on her own sob as she pulled her son into towards her chest. Just holding him as he cried. She held her baby in her arms as he sobbed. She just wanted to make it better. “I can’t sleep without thinking of it..” Nick said tearily. “Everytime I close my eyes…I see them. Everytime I think I’m moving on with my life. I’m back on that street corner. I…I just want it all to stop…” he cried. Charlie blinked back his own tears as he watched his boyfriend cry. It was breaking him to see Nick so broken and so upset. He just wanted to take it all away. He wanted to make Nick better, the same way that Nick had tried to make him better when he was ill, last year. It hurt him so badly.

Sarah held her son until his sobs quietened down. She ran her fingers through his hair, rubbed his back and whispered words of comfort in to his ear until he calmed down. She then reached in to her cardigan pocket and brought out a little prescription bottle of pills and sat it down on the coffee table. Nick glanced at the bottle. He knew right away what they were. The pharmacy sticker with his full name and date of birth was a dead giveaway. He glanced at Sarah who was looking at him with deep concern. “Why did you stop taking your medication, Nicky?”

Nick flushed red and looked down at his hands, twisting his fingers and picking at the bits of skin round his nails. Truthfully he didn’t know why he stopped taking his anti depressants. He just, stopped. Everything was spiralling and he just stopped taking them one morning. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, tears pooling in his eyes again. “It was stupid. I don’t know why….” A tear ran down his cheek and Sarah immediately hushed him, wiping the tear away with her thumb. “Please stop saying sorry baby. We are just worried about you. You can’t stop taking your medication.”
“I know. I’ll do better,” Nick made eye contact with his mum, hoping she could see how serious he was. She smiled softly at him. “Ok baby, take one now and then I think you should head to bed. Tomorrow is going to be a hard day but we will get through it together.” She grasped both Nick and Charlie’s hands. Nick nodded and enveloped them both in a tight hug. “Thank you,” he whispered, “ for not giving up on me. I know I’ve been a lot to deal with lately.”
“Nick, you haven’t been a lot. You’ve had a shit time, been through something awful….”
“We both have,” Nick interrupted. Charlie sighed, “yeah I know I was there but it really wasn’t the same. What happened to you should never have happened. And tomorrow we are going to make sure that it never happens again. Right?” Nick nodded and allowed Charlie to pull him up from the sofa. “Come on, let’s get you to bed.” Nick was exhausted from the day, from all the crying, from everything. He followed Charlie upstairs and crawled into bed. Charlie laid beside him running his fingers through his hair gently. “Sleep babe, I’ll be here.”
Maybe it was the medication the doctors gave him to calm him down, or maybe it was finally opening up to Sarah and Charlie about his feelings. But Nick slept a dreamless sleep and woke the morning of the trial feeling more calm and determined than he could have ever hoped. He dressed in his school trousers and shirt and tied his tie, he didn’t own a suit and the prosecution thought his school uniform would be a good way to remind the jury that he was a school child. Charlie came up behind him, kissing the back of his neck gently. “You ready?” Nick turned to face him, foreheads pressed together. “Yeah,” he breathed. “Let’s do this.”

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In the end, the trial only lasted a week. The jury took less than an hour to come to their decision. Guilty on all counts. The gang members were all sentenced to 2 years minimum behind bars for GBH, but Tony, the leader who had stabbed Nick and almost cost him his life, was found guilty of attempted murder and sentenced to at least 7 years. Nick drifted through the whole week in a daze. He gave his evidence in court with determination, answering all the questions posed to him. When he finally told everyone what Tony had said to him as he stabbed him, there wasn’t a dry eye on the court room. He shed tears and sought comfort in his friends and family, who were up in the viewing gallery to show their support. Charlie had given evidence which made Sarah cry, hearing his desperation of being unable to get to Nick to protect him. It had been a harrowing week, but as it came to an end Nick felt a strange sense of peace. It was over. They were all going to jail. Sarah insisted the springs return to the Nelson house to celebrate the verdict. She opened champagne, giving the teenagers a small glass. Nick took a sip as Sarah toasted both him and Charlie, speaking about how brave they were and how proud she was of them both. Jane and Julio echoed the comments. Nick felt his cheeks pink as Charlie kissed him gently. He sank down on the sofa, Nellie instantly jumping onto his lap. “You ok?” Charlie asked, looking intently at him. “Yeah,” he sighed. “ today’s been a lot. I feel like I could sleep for a week.” Charlie nodded, “me too.”
They ordered a Chinese takeaway, Nick had an appetite for the first time in weeks. Jane came over to sit by Nick. He looked at her curiously. His relationship with Jane had improved over the past year. When she saw how committed he was to Charlie when he was unwell. But they still didn’t talk often, just a quick hello and small talk about school. He knew she had visited him in the hospital, but those days were a blurry haze to him of pain and confusion so he didn’t really remember that. So for her to come and sit by him was unusual. Jane took a breath, then reached over and grasped his hand. His eyes widened a fraction. “Nick,” she let go of his hand and looked him in the eye. “I don’t think I ever thanked you. I’ve been going over in my mind and I don’t think I ever did.” Nicks eyes widened further. “Thanked me?” He spluttered. Why on earth was she thanking him?
“Yes, thanked you.” Jane smiled at him softly. “You tried to protect my boy. You did protect him. It was him they were targeting initially until you stepped in.” She smiled tearily. “You stopped him being hurt. I’ll never be able to thank you for it. I just wish you hadn’t been hurt. I’m so glad you are doing ok.” She looked at him seriously. “Charlie is so lucky to have you.” Nick shook his head, “no, I’m the lucky one,” he said quietly. Jane smiled. “Can I give you a hug?” Nick nodded. Charlie, who had been watching curiously, was shocked to see his mum, who really wasn’t a hugger, put her arms around Nick and hug him tight. Jane pulled back, squeezed his arms and then walked over to Julio and Sarah who were busy plating up their food. Charlie took the space his mum left. “What was that all about? My mum never hugs anyone!” Nick laughed quietly and shrugged his shoulders. “It was nice. She was thanking me for trying to protect you that night…..” he looked helplessly at Charlie. “There’s only one Spring I want hugs from though.” He held his arms out and Charlie snuggled close. “Good,” he declared. “But she’s right you know…..you did protect me that night. You’re my hero.” Nick hugged him tight and kissed the top of his head. “I’ll always try to protect you Char, but I’m not a hero. I got myself beaten up and nearly killed. Not exactly heroic,” he snorted. Charlie chuckled and lightly slapped him on the arm. “Oi. If I say you’re my hero you can’t do anything about it! End of discussion.” Nick smiled. “Fine. But you are my hero too, you do know that don’t you.” Charlie looked up and grinned at him. “Deal.”

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“You sure you want to do this?” Charlie looked over at Nick, who had a determined look on his eye.
“Yes. I don’t want those men to have any more power over me. They don’t get to decide where I feel safe going.” Charlie smiled at him, it had been a month since the trial and Nick was coming back to life. He was taking his medication religiously, attending his therapy with Rob. He was back playing rugby again and the light was returning to his eyes. “I’m so proud of you babe.” He squeezed his hand gently.
“Proud of us.” Nick argued back smiling softly. “You ready?”
Charlie took a breath, “ready. I’ve missed this place.”
Nick pushed open the door, the smell of salt and vinegar instantly hitting them.
“Hello dears what can I get you?” The lady behind the counter smiled at them.
“Two bags of chips please,” Nick replied. Charlie looked at him, checking for any sign of panic. “I’m good Char, I promise. They don’t get to win.” He took the bag from the lady and they set off towards the park, hand in hand.

Chapter Text

Sarah let out a little sneeze, catching it in her sleeve as she entered the kitchen. She’d woken up with a slight tickle in her throat that morning but thought nothing of it. She couldn’t be sick, not today, not this week. She was far too busy in work. She hit the kettle on to boil as she pulled two clean cups from the drying rack, placing two tea bags inside and waiting for the click of the kettle as she could hear heavy footsteps upstairs. Nicky was up and was parading around like a baby elephant as per usual. She smiled fondly as she stirred some sugar in to both cups. She carried them over to the dining table just as another sneeze surprised her, causing her to spill some of the hot liquid out of one of the cups. She sighed hastily as she grabbed some tissue to clean the mess up as another sneeze caught her off guard.

“Bless you!” Nick appeared in the kitchen, trying to tie his tie with one hand, the other texting on his phone. He eventually gave up, much to Sarah’s amusement and put his phone down with a huff. Sarah chuckled, “Thank you baby, how are you? And Charlie? I’m guessing that’s who you are texting….”
Nick smiled sheepishly as he tied his tie. “We are both good, are you ok? That was a lot of sneezing!” Sarah waved dismissively at him. “Oh I’m fine darling, just a sniffle. Might be the beginning of a cold which would be very inconvenient this week!” Nick nodded sympathetically, he knew his mum had a busy week ahead at work. She’d been planning the meetings for ages. “That would suck. Have you had any medicine?” He took the mug of tea from her gratefully as he popped some bread in the toaster. Sarah shook her head, “ no, I feel fine honest, just a lot of sneezes! I’ll take some in my bag for later just in case.”
“Good plan”Nick checked the time on his phone. “Oh my god, I’m so late!” He hastily buttered the toast and shoved it in his mouth as he put his shoes on and found his school bag exactly where he had dumped in when he got in from school yesterday.
“Want me to drive you?” Sarah offered. Nick hesitated, a lift would definitely be quicker but he didn’t want to put his mum out when she might be coming down with something. “Nah, I’ll be good, just need to walk fast!” He chuckled, kissing her on the top of her head. Sarah could remember when she could do that to him, but he had been taller than her for a long time now. “Ok baby, have a good day, say hi to Charlie from me. You’re home for dinner right? Maybe we could go for a driving lesson?”
“Yep! Sounds good! Bye mum,” nick yelled as he slammed the door shut behind him. He was so late. He shot a quick text to Charlie to tell him he’d meet him in form. He began jogging down the road.

———————

Sarah closed the front door with a sigh. Work had been brutal. Her sneezes had turned into a giant cold, complete with a runny nose, head ache, cough and sore throat. She felt dreadful. Her boss had finally sent her home after lunch saying nobody else in the office wanted to catch what she had and that she should rest up for the rest of the day. She greeted Nellie and Henry who were happy to see her home. She rummaged in the cupboard for some lemsip and sighed when she realised they had run out. Instead she boiled the kettle for a cup of tea and settled herself on the sofa with a blanket over her lap. It was only just past one so she had time to rest before Nick came home starving hungry from rugby practise. She allowed herself to close her eyes…..

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Nick unlocked the front door and clattered around in the hallway, dumping his rugby kit and taking off his shoes. The hallway was dark which was unusual. He clicked on the table lamp and hung his coat up. “Mum?” He called. Her car was in the drive and usually she’d be in the kitchen finishing up dinner. He walked through to the kitchen which was also dark. Weird. He heard some sounds coming from the lounge and followed the noise. Opening the door he was greeted by Nellie and Henry wagging their tails enthusiastically. He squatted down to give them a cuddle. “What are you two doing in here in the dark?” He turned on the light and jumped a foot in the air as he saw his mum fast asleep on the sofa. “Fucking hell,” he hissed. “Mum what’s going on?” He walked over to the sofa and sat down beside her. She was opening her eyes groggily. “Oh Nicky, what time is it?” She let out a hacking cough which caused Nicks eyes to widen. “ it’s half five. Mum are you ok?” He eyed her warily. She smiled at him, but the smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Oh I’m fine, I just laid down for a little nap and I must have slept for longer than I intended.” She grabbed a tissue from the box on the side and blew her nose. She sat up straight, then groaned as pain radiated through her head. “Mum you are sick!” Nick gently held his hand to her forehead, hissing at the heat coming off her. “You definitely have a temperature.” Sarah closed her eyes in defeat. She really did feel rotten. “Have you taken anything?” She shook her head. “I went to make some lemsip but I think we must have used the last one.” Nick felt instantly guilty. He had used the last sachet the other day when he felt a little under the weather. He should have told her so they could order more in their Tesco delivery. “That’s my fault. Let me go and get some from the shop. I’ll be two minutes.” He stood up, ignoring her pleas from the sofa. “I’ll be quick, do you need anything else while I’m there?” Sarah shook her head. “No, I’ll be fine, thank you baby.” She felt so lucky to have such a kind son. It had just been the two of them since David went off to uni and they really did make a good team.

Nick jogged to the little Tesco, grabbing a basket at the entrance. He found the lemsip and added a pack. He also picked up some soft tissues, throat sweets and ibuprofen. He grabbed some fresh chicken soup to try and tempt her to eat. As he went to pay he noticed some daffodils by the till and he chose a small bunch. It might cheer her up a bit. She worked so hard, looked after him so well he was determined to do the same for her. She deserved to have someone look after her for once. He tapped his card on the reader to pay and was back home within half an hour.

Nick entered the house and slipped off his shoes in the hallway. “Mum? I’m back.” He called out. He frowned slightly, seeing the kitchen light was on. It hadn’t been before. He stepped in to the kitchen just to find Sarah hovering over the open fridge, looking like she was about to keel over any minute. “Mum? What are you doing?” Nick asked. “Seeing what i have in for dinner.” Sarah replied hoarsely, it sounding like it was paining her to speak. “I brought you soup.” Nick replied as he closed the freezer and took Sarah’s arm, guiding her over to one of the chairs at the dining table, before she collapsed. “Oh sweetheart, that’s so sweet.” She cooed. She definitely had an amazing kid right there, but she was the mother and Nicky was the child. She couldn’t just stop parenting because she felt a little under the weather, or a lot. It didn’t matter, either way. She couldn’t take a day off from being a mother. “I need to make you something, darling.” She croaked out. “No.” Nick replied matter of factly. “You need to rest.” He said firmly. It wasn’t a question. It was an instruction. His mum looked awful. She had definitely caught the horrible flu that has been charging its way through town the last few weeks. Thankfully he had managed to escape Scot-free apart from the little tickle in his throat and cough he had just the other day. Oh no! Was this his fault? Had he passed his lurgy on to Sarah? “I’m completely fine, love.” Sarah replied, although she was cut off by a hacking cough that couldn’t have timed better if it tried to. Nick raised his eyebrow. “Yeah, you sound it.” He replied as he flicked on the kettle. He turned around to his mum, putting a hand on her shoulder. She looked poorlier than ever, why wouldn’t she just admit it? “Let me take care of you, for once.” He said. “Please…” Sarah looked up at her youngest. What did she ever do to deserve such a wonderful kid? Most teenagers would lock themselves away so they didn’t catch their parents germs. Not Nicky. He was an angel in disguise. “Ok, baby.” She finally agreed. Nicky was stubborn. He wouldn’t have given in until she agreed anyway.

Sarah’s eyes fell on the bunch of daffodils abandoned on the kitchen counter. “What are those, sweetheart?” She asked. Nick smiled sheepishly at her as he picked the flowers up, flashing her a grin. “I saw them in the shop, thought you might like them seeing as you’re feeling poorly.” He said as he placed them down again before rummaging in the cupboard under the sink for a vase. “I better get them in some water.” Sarah felt her heart warm. She really did have a son who was one in a million. “Oh thank you baby.” She smiled. “You really didn’t have to do that.” “I wanted to.” Nick returned the smile as he chopped the stems to make them shorter before popping them in to the vase. “You’re a good boy.” Sarah grinned. She had to physically restrain herself from giving Nick the biggest hug ever and a kiss on the cheek. She didn’t want to pass on whatever illness she had, though, so she held herself back.

Nick smiled. “Go get yourself in to bed. I’ll bring you up some tea.” He said as he gestured towards the stairs. “I haven’t fed the dogs yet.” Sarah replied as she shakily stood up before catching a sneeze in the sleeve of her cardigan. “Never mind that.” Nick replied. “I’ve got it.” Sarah sighed. She knew that Nick wouldn’t be satisfied until she was in bed resting and that actually sounded really nice right now. She headed upstairs, quickly changing out of her work clothes and slipping into some comfortable pyjamas. She glanced at the clock. It was barely 6pm. She shouldn’t be getting in to bed at this time. There was so much needing done. Dinner, dishes, dog walking and the numerous piles of washing that she could be getting through but her bed seemed so inviting right now. It wouldn’t hurt for her to have a little lie down, would it? Sarah slipped under the covers and rested her head against the pillows, sinking in to them. She felt utterly exhausted. She could feel her eyes beginning to close when she heard a little tapping on the door and in walked Nicky armed with a tray of supplies. A bowl of warm chicken soup, some crackers, a mug of tea and a mug of Lemsip, a blister packet of ibuprofen, a packet of honey and lemon throat lozenges and some tissues. Not to mention the thermometer from the bathroom cabinet. Sarah felt her heart melt. Nicky had thought of everything. She picked up the mug that had the lemsip in it, taking a large sip and instantly feeling its effects. “Thank you, baby.” She said hoarsely as she took a tissue out of the package. She felt absolutely dreadful. “You need to try and eat something.” Nick said. Sarah grimaced slightly. The last thing she felt like doing was eating. She didn’t have an appetite at all. “You don’t need to fuss darling…i am fine.” Sarah protested again. “Why don’t we see what this little guys got to say?” He smirked as he picked up the digital thermometer. He mimicked Sarah, the countless times that he’d tried protesting that he was fine as she tried to take his temperature over the years. Sarah shot her son a little glare. Nick just raised his eyebrows as he pressed the device on and handed it over to his mother who reluctantly slipped it under her tongue. “I don’t want to get you sick, baby.” Sarah replied, voice slightly muffled by the thermometer. “I’m 98% sure i gave it to you…i had a sore throat the other day after ruby, besides the majority of school are down with the lurgy at the minute.” Nick replied as he waited patiently for the little beep. Just satisfied that she was finally admitting feeling unwell.

Nick removed the thermometer from his mums mouth and grimaced at the reading. 39.2° C. Sarah was definitely running one hell of a temperature. No wonder she felt so rotten. “Can you try a little soup?” He urged as he gently pushed the bowl towards her. “It’ll help the medicine work quicker.” Sarah couldn’t help but smile softly yet her son, despite having no appetite she did pick a spoonful up to her lips. It was just the right temperature. It was delicious, actually. She managed around half the bowl, along with a couple of plain crackers. “What are you going to have for dinner?” Sarah asked, feeling the guilt of not feeling well enough to make her son a meal. “I’ll stick a pizza in the oven.” Nick replied. “I’m 17 mum…i can feed myself, y’know.” He smirked. Sarah chuckled chestily as she reached out and ruffled his hair. She sipped down the rest of her Lemsip and then reached for the mug of tea, which was thankfully still warm. Nick pushed the blister packet of ibuprofen towards her. “Take some of this and then try and sleep. You look knackered, mum.” Sarah didn’t have to be told twice as she popped the medicine in to her mouth and swallowed it down with some tea. She then nestled down against the pillows as Nick moved the tray to the bedside table and turned the light off. “I’ll just be downstairs, if you need anything.” He said, turning towards the bedroom door just as his phone vibrated. He pulled it out and glanced at the screen.

Charlie: I’ve just finished homework. Meet at the arcade in an hour?

Shit! Nick mentally cursed himself as he had completely forgotten that he had made plans with Charlie and some of their friends to grab a bite to eat and have a game of bowling. It was a school night so wouldn’t be a late one, but he couldn’t leave his mum when she wasn’t feeling well. He sighed. What was he going to do?

Charlie watched the little dots on his screen indicating that Nick was typing. They started, then stopped, started then stopped. In the end Charlie got fed up waiting and hit the call button.
“What’s the matter?” He asked quickly. “Why can’t you decide what to type, is everything ok?”
Nick sighed. “I’m sorry, it had totally slipped my mind that we’d organised bowling. I er….i don’t think I can come,” nick slumped on the sofa with a huff. He hated disappointing people, especially Charlie. “That’s ok, it’s only bowling…..how come though? You were looking forward to it?”
“Mums not well,” he explained. “I came home from school to find her asleep on the sofa. I’ve given her medicine and food and sent her up to bed,…..but I just don’t want to leave her Char. She’s really poorly”
Charlie felt his heart swell, Nick was such a good son. He hated to think of Sarah being poorly by herself. “Oh babe of course you should stay and look after her. Want me to come and keep you company?”
Nick hesitated. He’d really like some support but Charlie and their friends had been looking forward to tonight, he wasn’t about to spoil it for him. “No, honestly I’m fine. You go meet everyone and tell them I’m sorry I can’t come”
“You sure?” Charlie really didn’t care if he missed a game of bowling.
“Yeah definitely. I’ll text you later ok? Love you!”
“Love you too babe,” Charlie ended the call. He smiled to himself. Nick was such an idiot if he thought for a second he was going to leave him to manage his poorly mum by himself. He sent off a quick text to Tao to explain the situation, then headed upstairs to get ready.

Nick heated up a pizza for tea and ate it by himself in the kitchen. He could hear his mum coughing and coughing upstairs. He sighed. He had hoped she was getting some rest. He put his plate in the dishwasher and headed upstairs to check on her.
Sarah was propped up in bed, her face flushed with fever. “Oh mum,” Nick said softly. “Not feeling any better?” He sat down carefully on the edge of her bed. Sarah gave him a small smile, “no, not really. My chest is really sore.” She admitted. Nick felt her forehead again, “you’re still really hot mum. Do you think we should go get you checked out at the walk in clinic?” Sarah closed her eyes. She knew she most likely was developing a chest infection, she’d had enough over the years to know the difference between a regular cough and something more serious. And she also knew the quicker she started antibiotics the quicker she’d start to feel better. But the thought of getting in the car and driving to the clinic made her feel even worse. “probably,” she admitted, “but I really don’t have the energy to drive this evening. It can wait.”
Nick shook his head, if his mum was admitting to feeling that poorly he wasn’t going to let her wait till tomorrow, “why don’t I drive?” He suggested. “It would be good practise for me to drive in the dark.” He could see Sarah’s hesitation, “please mum. I want to help.”
Eventually Sarah nodded. Nick smiled in relief. He helped her to sit up and hovered behind her as she made her way slowly to the bathroom. “Baby, I’m ok, stop fussing,” Sarah smiled, before a hacking cough overtook her. Nick glared at her knowingly. “Oh yes, totally healthy,” he smirked. He waited outside the bathroom for her, then helped her down the stairs. He was just searching for his L plates when the doorbell went.
Confused at who could be calling round he opened the door, eyes widening at the sight of his gorgeous boyfriend bundled up in his coat, cheeks pink from the cold air. “Char! What are you doing here?” He immediately swept him up into a hug. “You didn’t really think I was going to go bowling and leave you here by yourself did you?” Nick grinned at him, “I’m so glad you are here,” he breathed in the scent of Charlie’s freshly washed hair, feeling himself calm down instantly. They were interrupted by a wet sounding cough coming from the kitchen.
“That sounds nasty,” Charlie said heading towards the kitchen. “Yeah, I’m taking her to the walk in clinic, just to be on the safe side. Well I will be when I can find my L plates,” he muttered. Charlie pointed to the hall table where he could clearly see the plates sticking out from under a pile of Nicks school books. “Oh,” Nick blushed grabbing them, “ thanks Charlie.”
They made their way into the kitchen. “Charlie darling, how are you?” Sarah tried to sound cheerful but her croaky voice gave her away. Charlie smiled at her and gave her a little wave. “Hi Sarah, I’m sorry you are feeling poorly. I’ve come to help!” She smiled at him, “ oh you dear, you didn’t need to do that.” Nick grabbed the keys and ushered his mum into the hall. “Charlie’s going to keep me company, come on let’s get you in the car.” He handed Sarah her coat and they made their way to the car.
Charlie climbed into the back while Sarah sat down tiredly in the front. “Nice and slowly Nicky, ok?” Nick gave her a small grin, “of course. I’ve got this.”
Nick drove carefully to the clinic and parked up safely. They made their way in and Charlie and Nick sat down on some empty seats while Sarah checked herself in. She came back and sat down with a sigh. “Shouldn’t be too long,” she said, coughing tiredly into the crook of her arm. She laid back against the seat and closed her eyes. Charlie and Nick scrolled on TikTok to kill time while Sarah dozed. Nick kept shooting glances at her. She looked so poorly. He was relieved when she was finally called through to the GP. He watched her walk away. Charlie squeezed his hand. “She’ll be fine Nick, they’ll sort her out.”
He smiled softly at him, “yeah I know. I just hate seeing her poorly. She’s always the strong one. I guess it just reminds me that it’s just me and her you know? If anything happened to her, I don’t know what I’d do….” Charlie hugged him tight. He had a tricky relationship with his own mum, but he knew he had a much bigger number of close family that would always be there for him. Nick couldn’t rely on his dad or brother. It really was just him and Sarah against the world. “Hey, don’t think like that. You’ve got me too, and my family for what it’s worth. And your auntie Di.” Nick nodded and wiped his watery eyes. “God I love you,” he said.
Sarah was in with the doctors for about ten minutes, emerging with a prescription for some antibiotics and strict orders to rest for the next few days. Nick drove them carefully back home, stopping off at the late night pharmacy to collect the medicine. “Right mum, you heard the doctor, off to bed with you!” Sarah chuckled, “I feel like our roles have reversed, “ she joked. But she didn’t argue, the trip out had wiped her completely.
Nick watched her take the stairs slowly before heading to the kitchen to make some tea for Sarah to take her tablets with. Charlie watched him fondly. “Can I do anything to help?” Nick shook his head. “Just you being here is enough for me, thank you for giving up your night to hang out at the doctors!”
Charlie laughed, “my pleasure. No place I’d rather be.”
Nick took the tea up to his mum, ensuring she took her tablets before leaving her to sleep. He put her phone next to her, “text me if you need anything mum.” She smiled and nodded sleepily at him. “Thank you baby, you’ve been so wonderful.” He smiled back, closing the door gently.
Charlie was waiting at the bottom of the stairs. “I have to head home now,” he sighed. “Call me if you need anything?” Nick hugged him tightly and gave him a kiss. “Thanks for coming, see you at school tomorrow.” Charlie nodded as he stepped out into the cold. “And text me when you get home safe!”

The next morning Nick got up early and got ready for school. He’d heard Sarah coughing a lot in the night but she seemed to have quietened down. He boiled the kettle for some tea and made her some toast. He took it all upstairs on a tray along with some pain killers and her antibiotic. He nudged the door open with his foot. “Morning mum, how are you feeling?” Sarah pulled herself upright in the bed, she still looked feverish but she smiled as she saw Nick shuffling in with the tray of goodies. “I’m fine darling, this is so sweet of you.” She accepted the tray gratefully. Nick sat with her while she ate. “I have to go to school now, are you going to be ok? “ Sarah nodded. “I’ll be fine baby, don’t worry about me. You have a lovely day ok?” He leaned over and kissed her on the top of her head. “I will, love you mum.”

Nick raced to school and into his tutor room just in time. Charlie looked up from his phone as he arrived. “How’s Sarah?” Nick smiled as he sat down, “she’s ok. Told me to stop fussing and go to school!” Charlie chuckled. “I’m glad. Are you ok?” He looked at Nick whose face was flushed. “Me? Oh I’m fine, it’s just really hot in here.” Charlie looked at him puzzled. It was practically freezing in here, the school heating was not very efficient. “Um babe, it’s not hot at all.” He pressed the back of his hand to nicks forehead. Yep, he definitely had a temperature. “Nick I think you might have whatever Sarah has….” Nick looked at him confused, “nah I feel fine char, honestly….” He was cut off by a giant sneeze.
“Oh shit.”

Chapter Text

Nick felt like he was dragging his feet along the ground. His head was throbbing. Where was Charlie? He’d lost Charlie! He’d promised Tori that he would look after Charlie. He wasn’t doing a very good job of that was he?? Everything was too loud, too bright. The smell of smoke from the bonfire was overpowering. Nick could feel his chest becoming tight. Nick’s eyes darted frantically around, trying to see if he could recognise anyone. Ah, yes. There was Issac and who’s that again? Oh yeah, James. He turned his head in the other direction. It was just a sea of people, but where was Charlie? He had to find Charlie.  He then spotted some tents nearby. He could vaguely remember Tori mentioning something about her hanging around there if Charlie needed her for anything. Perhaps Charlie had gone straight there after they were separated in the busy crowds?

“Charlie?”

“Charlie?” Nick called again as he noticed one of the zips was only partially done up. He crouched down as he peered through the little gap, only to find Tori Spring staring back at him as she sipped lemonade through a paper straw. “Hi” “Oh…sorry, um.’ Nick stuttered out, feeling slightly awkward. Charlie clearly was not here. Where was he? Tori was going to end him, for sure. “Where’s Charlie?” She asked, getting straight to the point. Charlie obviously wasn’t with Nick seeing as the older boy had been calling out for him, so where was he?  Tori watched as Nick’s face turned two shades paler than it already was. “Uh..I lost him, sorry.” Nick said slowly. The one thing Tori had asked him to do was look after Charlie and he couldn’t even managed that, without screwing up. “You said you would look after him.” She said accusingly. She’d left them less than an hour ago and Nick had already managed to lose her little brother. “You’re not very good at keeping your promises. Are you?” She said, glancing at him. It was then that she realised he looked a little ill. The glassy look in his eyes and the flushed face. He looked like he could pass out any minute. “You don’t look well.” She commented, stating the obvious. If Nick wasn’t feeling well than surely he shouldn’t be here? He should be at home, but that still didn’t explain where Charlie was. 

 Nick lifted his head to look at her with a look of certainty on his face. “I’ll find him, I promise.” He assured her. Completely ignoring her other comment. He was fine. He just had to find Charlie. He had to male sure Charlie was alright and then he needed to find the Rugby lads. He promised Charlie he would come out. He said he would do it tonight. He wasn’t going to let his boyfriend down. He rose to his feet and turned away from the tent. He had to find Charlie. He took a deep breath before heading back towards the crowds. The noise was piercing his ears, his legs felt like jelly. His face felt hot and he couldn’t work out if it was coming off the heat of the bonfire or was he feverish? He felt like he could be. His headache had intensified and he felt sick to his stomach, like he might actually throw up right here and now.

The lights. The noise. The people. The smell. It was all getting too much for Nick but he pushed through the sea of people, determined to find Charlie. He stumbled through the crowds as people shoved against him, he almost tripped up twice. There were far too many people. He didn’t like this. He couldn’t remember ever feeling claustrophobic before, but that was exactly how he was feeling right now. His chest felt tight, like he was struggling to get air and his heart felt like it was about to beat right out of his chest. His hands felt hot and clammy and he felt like he was practically dragging his feet. “What’s up Nick” He heard a familiar voice. Otis. He blinked a few times. Otis was there and Christian, Sai, too. What was he waiting for? He could just tell them right now. Get it over with, so why was he finding it so difficult. “Um…Yeah…I…uh..just wanted to talk to guys about something.” He forced out, feeling like he was about to choke on his own words. “You’re bisexual.” That was Tori’s voice, he spun around. What was she doing here? Last time he checked she was over at the tents. “So you’re going to cheat on my brother??”  What?? No! He would never do that. Why was she saying this? He would never do anything to hurt Charlie. “Are you sure you’re not just gay?” Tori disappeared and was replaced by Imogen. Why did she look so cross with him? She was his best friend but she looked angry, disappointed. Nick didn’t understand. Why did everyone seem upset with him? What had he done? He was so confused. He had to be dreaming. He closed his eyes, tightly squeezing them shut and then reopened them. Imogen had disappeared. He let out a sigh of relief. He was still there though. He was still at the bonfire so he hadn’t dreamt that part. His mates were staring at him, confusion and concern painted on their faces. Suddenly he felt an arm roughly slung around his shoulders. “Awww! Share with the group.” That was Harry Green. Nick felt his breathing quickening. Harry wasn’t supposed to be here. Harry couldn’t know. He couldn’t tell the bad now. Not whilst Harry was about. The whole school would know by tomorrow morning. “Come on, spit it out.” His voice echoing in Nick’s brain. He could feel his vision blurring slightly as his heart beat faster and faster and his legs had turned to jelly again. He felt like he was about to collapse.

“It’s fun isn’t It?” Ben hope appeared in front of him. “Sneaking about with him?”  Nick felt the bile rising up in his throat. How dare Ben even mention Charlie after what he had done to him. He had taking advantage of Charlie’s vulnerabilities and insecurities and had just trod all over them.  “Pick a side..”  The next voice sent shivers down Nick’s spine. David? No. This couldn’t be real. David couldn’t be here. He didn’t even go to the school anymore, but he was here, stood right in front of Nick, his arms crossed over his chest and a big smug look on his face. It made nick feel sick. “You promised you were going to come out…”. Charlie! Charlie was here. Oh Thank god, but, why did he look so unhappy. He looked annoyed, annoyed with him. Nick choked back a sob. What was going on? He couldn’t bear Charlie being upset with him.  Nick could feel the world begin to spin around him, everything became blurry. The voices were getting louder. They were practically shouting at him. He swatted it to stop. It was too noisy.  “I Should’ve known you’d turn out to be gay…” “Still lying…because you’re gay.” “This is exactly why I didn’t want to tell you.” His own voice seemed to be the loudest of all as it echoed in his mind, piercing his ears. He covered his ears with his hand, vowing for the noise to stop as his legs gave way, sending him crashing down on to his knee’s, he switched position, hugging his knees close to his chest, holding them tightly as he began to rock himself back and forwards, leaving everyone around him stunned in to silence.

“Nick mate, you ok?” He felt a hand touch his shoulder and he flinched, suddenly overcome with a wave of embarrassment. Everyone was watching him. Judging him. He needed to get away, fast.  He pushed the hand away that rested on him. He realised somewhere in the back of his mind that it was Sai….then he stood up and ran. Tears were pouring down his face and his breath was coming in ragged gasps as he pushed through the crowds and into the peace and quiet of the woods. When he felt certain nobody had followed him he slowed down, coming to a stop by an old oak tree. The adrenaline that had coursed through his veins in panic was leaving him and he was exhausted. He let himself fall to the ground, back against the rough bark of the tree. He tucked his knees up to his chest and squeezed his eyes shut. What the hell is wrong with me? Everyone saw you back at the bonfire. They will all be laughing at you. Loser Nick, crying on the floor like a baby. What would charlie think?

Nick felt his breathing quicken again as he descended back into panic. He put his hand to his chest, opening his eyes to realise he was completely by himself in the woods, in the dark. He could hear the faint noise of the party in the distance. But he was completely alone. What was he thinking running off like that? His chest began to hurt….was he having a heart attack? Is that was this was? He struggled to control his breathing but it was no use. He could see spots appearing in his vision. He was going to pass out. He tried to call for help but he couldn’t get any words out. He needed Charlie. He allowed his eyes to close and his head flopped back against the trunk of the tree. 

Charlie felt like he had been going round in circles looking for Nick. They’d managed to lose each other by the bonfire and he couldn’t find him anywhere. He wandered around an area where people had pitched some tents and began peering inside. At the third tent he was surprised to see Tori sitting by herself drinking a can of lemonade through a straw. She looked relieved to see him. “Where have you been Charlie?” “I was looking for Nick, have you seen him?” Tori nodded, taking a slurp of her drink. “He came here about 20 minutes ago looking for you….” She paused, as if debating what to tell him next. “I may have had a go at him for losing you.” Charlie’s eyes widened, “What the hell Tori, why would you do that?” Tori had the decency to look a little guilty. “I told him to look after you.” Charlie huffed, “I’m not a baby Tori, it wasn’t his fault, we just got separated in the crowd.” He sighed, “Which way did he go?” Tori pointed back towards the bonfire and then as he set off in that direction she added, “He didn’t look very well….” Charlie turned back to her. “What do you mean not well?” Tori shrugged her shoulders, “He was pale and a bit sweaty looking. He seemed a bit out of it.” Charlie felt his heart sink. He knew Nick wasn’t right. “I can’t believe you told him off, I have to go find him.” He headed off in the direction of the noise and was soon back at the bonfire. 

The crowd had got louder since he left, the bonfire was dangerously close to being out of control. Whose idea was it to burn all their gcse books? Charlie wanted to just find Nick and take him home.  Eventually he saw Sai and Otis deep in conversation at the edge of the crowd. He jogged over to them, “Hey guys, have you seen Nick anywhere? I can’t find him.” They both turned to face him, their faces full of worry. “Shit, we hoped he was with you.” Sai ran his hands through his hair. “He went all funny and then ran off. We tried to follow him but he was too quick.” “Funny?” What do you mean funny?” Charlie felt a cold sense of fear creeping through him. Nick had run off? “Yeah,” Otis explained, “Mate we don’t know what happened. One minute Harry was being his usual moronic self, the next it was like Nick was in his own world. He was holding his head and crouched down on the floor…..” “I put my hand on his shoulder and he just like….bolted.” Finished Sai.  “Shit….i need to find him. Which way did he go?” Sai pointed towards the woods. “That way. But he could be anywhere by now.” Charlie immediately pulled out his phone and dialled Nick, but it went straight to voicemail. “Fucking hell there’s no signal out here. I don’t know what to do.” He could feel panic rising up in him. “Let’s split up and look for him. Meet back here in half an hour. I’ll go grab Chris, he can help.” Charlie nodded gratefully and immediately set off in the direction Sai pointed.  “Hey, wait up Charlie,” he turned round quickly at the sound of Tori’s voice. “Let me help you look for him.” Charlie hesitated, he was still pissed off with her for what she said to Nick…..but he also didn’t really fancy wandering in the woods in the dark by himself. “Please? I feel bad for how I spoke to him. I’d like to apologise.” Charlie’s eyes widened. Tori never apologised for anything. “Ok. Sure. But if we find him let me talk to him first?” Tori nodded quickly and they made their way into the woods. Tori turned on the torch on her phone and Charlie copied her. It wasn’t completely dark but it would be easy to trip or miss their footing. After ten minutes of walking in one direction Charlie stopped with a sigh. “Shall we go back in the direction of the party? See if we missed something?” Tori glanced around her. “Let’s go left here for a bit and then head back, so we are taking a different route.” Charlie agreed and they set off again. As they walked Charlie spotted something over on the right, just off the pathway….a shadowy form by a large oak tree. He stopped, his hand on Toris shoulder to get her attention. “Is that him?” He whispered, gesturing to the tree. Tori squinted her eyes, “I think it is.” Charlie felt his heart rate speed up. He walked cautiously over, relief flooding through him when he realised he was right. However the relief was short lived as he took in Nicks tear stained face, his strange shallow breathing and the fact that his eyes were closed.  “Nick?” Charlie crouched down slowly in front of him. “Babe? Can you hear me?” He gently put his hand over Nick’s clammy one.

Nick couldn’t breathe.  His chest felt tight and it hurt.  His lungs felt like they were on fire. He didn’t know what was going on. Where was he? He could hear faint music in the distance. Laughter. Chanting. A party?  He had been at a party. No. A bonfire. Yes. That was right. He had been at a bonfire. He remembered now. The heat of the flames from the fire against his skin, the smell of smoke. Someone had tried to thrust a packet of matches in to his hand, claiming that he should be the one to light the fire as Rugby captain. He’d declined. Someone had taken over. Yeah. Harry. Harry Greene had lit the fire. The cheers and the noise got louder and louder. His ears were ringing.  Something had been missing though. No. Not something. Someone. Charlie. He had lost Charlie.  He’d promised that he would look after him. He squeezed his eyes shut tighter.  His body ached and his brain was screaming at him. He could feel tears slip down his cheeks as he balled his fists under his shirt, trying to keep warm. Idiot. Why hadn’t you brought a jacket?? He felt a twig snap and footsteps nearby. He was no longer alone. He started breathing heavier. He didn’t want anyone to see him like this. He heard a familiar voice calling his name. He pulled his hands out from under his shirt, covering his ears as he began to rock himself back and forth. He felt someone crouch down beside him. He didn’t know who it was, but he felt safe. He still didn’t open his eye but he slowly lowered his hand as he felt someone place this hand on top of his.  He quickly pulled his hand away. 

Charlie could feel Nick flinch under his touch, the way he pulled his hand away, his eyes squeezed tightly closed, his jaw clenched and his breathing was shallow and uneven.  It was almost as if he was struggling to breathe. Charlie instantly could see the signs.  Nick was having a panic attack.  Charlie knew what that looked like. Christ. He knew what it felt like having suffered from many of them, himself.  He’d never seen Nick like this, though. Not ever.  The older boy was completely unaware of his surroundings. He was clearly afraid of something. Someone? What had happened? They’d only been separated for less than an hour. Something had got Nick in to this state, though.  Tori hovered back, keeping her distance. She didn’t want to startle Nick or upset him more than he clearly already was, but she wanted to stay close in case Charlie needed her.  Nick had looked even more terrible when she had seen him earlier that evening. She began feeling guilty. Should she had intervened? What would she have done though? She hadn’t known where Charlie was then and she didn’t have a contact number for Sarah. Nick had looked ill earlier and he wasn’t  faring any better now.

Charlie hesitated for a moment before reaching out and brushing a sweaty strand of his boyfriend’s hair away from his forehead.  Nick’s eyes were still shut tightly and his breathing was fast paced and rigid.   “Nick?” Charlie asked in a calm, soothing voice. The last thing he was wanting was to scare Nick.  “It’s me, Charlie.” He said quietly as he again placed his hand over Nick’s. This time Nick didn’t pull away, but he didn’t react, either.  “Can you open your eyes for me, love?” Charlie asked.  “It’s okay, you’re okay..” he soothed.  “I’m not going to hurt you…. I promise.” Charlie clarified. He didn’t know why he felt the need to establish that. He would never hurt Nick. He could never. Something had visibly gotten his boyfriend in to this state though and he needed to find out what.     Nick blinked his eyes open.  He was so confused.  “Nick? I need you to breathe with me, Ok?” Charlie instructed. He was worried that Nick wasn’t getting enough air and would eventually pass out.  “Just copy me…” he said as he took in a deep breath, held it for a few seconds and exhaled.  “In for three, out for three.” He said as he repeated it. “Can you do that for me?” He asked. He needed Nick to keep focusing on him.  Nick was struggling at this point but Charlie was determined. He knew what it felt like to be where Nick was.  Nick tried to focus his full attention on Charlie. He copied what the other boy was doing. He inhaled sharply, holding the breath for the count of 3 and then exhaling.  He repeated this process a few times until breathing became easier and less painful.  “That’s it. You’re doing great.” Charlie told him,   Tori watched on in awe of her brother. She’d coaxed Charlie through some awful panic attacks herself over the years but seeing her brother help someone else filled her with immense pride. 

I…I’m sorry.” Nick said quietly. He didn’t want Charlie to be mad at him, but he had broken his promise so he had every right to be upset with him. Charlie blinked in confusion. What on earth did Nick have to apologise for? Why was he saying sorry.   “Nick? You have nothing to apologise for.” He assured him as he squeezed his hand.   “I promised.” Nick croaked out as he blinked and more tears rolled down his cheeks.   “Tori thinks I’m going to cheat on you.”  Charlie’s eyes widened. What did Nick mean by that?  His sister wouldn’t say something as cruel as that. He glanced around at his sister, meeting the same horrified look on her face that he was wearing. She shook her head. Confirming that she didn’t say that. She wouldn’t say that. She liked Nick, he brought out the best in her little brother.   “Imogen thinks I’m confused. I’m Bi…I..I’m not gay…”. Nick mumbled.  Charlie was growing more worried now.  Nick wasn’t making any sense, at all.   “David says I need to pick a side. That I don’t know what I am.”  Charlie frowned. David wasn’t here? Neither was Imogen, come to think about it. His eyes widened as it become apparent that this was all in Nick’s head. He’d been hallucinating. Had he been hearing voices?    “Ben said I’m just stringing you along.”   Charlie froze at the mention of Ben.  Ben had no right to say anything like that to Nick.  “I…I’m just like him.” Nick sobbed.  “I lied to you.”   Charlie instinctively reached out, cupping both sides of Nick’s face with his hands and forcing him to look him in the eyes. “Look at me.” He said firmly.   “You’re nothing like Ben.” He needed Nick to hear that. He needed him to know it.  “Do you hear me?” He repeated. He needed confirmation from his boyfriend that he understood.  Nick nodded. His eyes fixed on Charlie’s.  “David is an arsehole.” Charlie told him.  “Don’t take anything he says seriously and Imogen…she doesn’t mean any harm. She just words things incorrectly.” He explained. He needed Nick to know that the voices in his head weren’t real.   Nick blinked back more tears.  “I lied to you…” he breathed out.  Charlie frowned. Why did Nick keep saying that? What had he lied about.   “What do you mean?” He asked as he traced his finger along Nick’s fringe.    “I promised.” He mumbled.  “I promised you that I was going to come out.” He croaked.   “I…I tried.” He sobbed.  “I promised I tried.” His sobs became heavier.  “I…I just couldn’t.”    It was all beginning to make sense to Charlie.  Nick was having panic attacks because he felt pressure to come out.  He obviously felt like he owed people that. He didn’t. He shouldn’t feel like he had to come out to anyone.  Charlie felt guilty. Had he made Nick feel like he had to come out he quite obviously wasn’t ready to.   “Nick…” he soothed.  “There’s no deadline. Tonight just wasn’t the night.” He said softly.  “I think when you’re not straight there’s like this rule that you need to come out right away…you don’t.” He assured him. “You’re in control Nick. You get to decide who knows and who doesn’t.” He squeezed his hand again.   “I’m sorry if I made you feel like you need to tell everyone.” He said softly. He felt awful that he has put some sort of unnecessary strain on Nick, he didn’t mean to. The prospect of being out with Nick as his boyfriend was exciting but he hadn’t meant to force that on to Nick.  Nick’s breathing had started to calm down. For the first time since Charlie had found him was his breathing starting to sound normal. Nick rested his head against the tree.  “Nick? Are you Ok?”  Charlie asked.  “I feel really ill..”  Nick whispered quietly. Charlie instantly pulled his phone out. He had to get Nick home. 

Sarah had just settled down with a cup of tea and a sleeve of digestive biscuits about to start watching the newest episode in the current drama series when her phone started to ring. She frowned when she saw her youngest son’s name flash up on the screen. She glanced at her watch. It was barely even 9pm. Far too early for Nick to wanting a lift home. He had hours before curfew, unless he was genuinely not enjoying himself.  She picked  her phone up and answered it before pressing it to her ear.  “Nicky? It’s a bit early darling…is everything ok?”      “Sarah, hi…” Charlie spoke. He hadn’t really thought this through. He didn’t really know what to tell Sarah but all he knew was that Nick needed to go home.    “Charlie? Is everything alright, love?” Sarah asked, her frown deepening. Why was Charlie calling her? On Nicky’s mobile? Had something happened?     “Nick’s not feeling very good..” Charlie said quickly.  It wasn’t exactly a lie. Nick looked awful but he didn’t want to tell Sarah like this, over the phone, that Nick had suffered a massive panic attack. He didn’t want to betray his boyfriend’s trust but he also wouldn’t be being a very good boyfriend if he left Nick sitting alone in the cold, dark woods.   “Oh dear..” Sarah replied, her voice thick with worry. Nick had looked little flushed earlier, but she had just put that down to the fact he had taken Nellie for a walk without wearing a hat even after her advising him to as it had been very hot out this afternoon. She knew her son was like a sun magnet. That would be the strawberry blonde gene. “Is he alright?”  Charlie glanced at Nick, who had again had closed his eyes as he leaned his head back against the tree trunk behind him. He was taking deep breaths again in an attempt to regulate his breathing.  Charlie reached out for his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze when he scrunched his nostrils. He hadn’t noticed it before. The smell. The smell of vomit. He glanced down to Nick’s shirt. It was damp. Had Nick gotten himself so worked up that he had thrown up?   

“Charlie?”  He snapped out of his train of thoughts by Sarah’s voice and realised he’d left her hanging on the other end of the call.   “Uh…he said he had a headache earlier.” Charlie explained.  “He’s been a little sick, too.” He added, hearing Sarah sigh on the other end. “Poor thing.”   “He’s probably caught a bug.”    “Yeah.” Charlie agreed.  Although it was on the tip of his tongue to tell Sarah the real reason for Nick’s poorly state. He bit his lip.    “Could you pick us up?” He asked quietly.  He just knew one thing that he had to get Nick out of the cold and in to the comfort of his own bed.   “Of course darling.” Sarah said quickly.  “I’m on my way. Where was the party again?” She asked.  Nick hadn’t been very clear on the location earlier when he had told her that he was going out for the evening.  Charlie sighed. It wasn’t exactly legal, what they had been doing. Like really? A bonfire in the woods?  “We’re in the forest behind Sai’s house.” Charlie explained, deciding to skip out on the details, although he knew Sarah would probably have some questions for them later.  “I’m leaving now sweetheart.” Sarah assured him.  “Could both make your way to the main road. I should only be about 10 minutes..”   “Okay! Thank you, Sarah.” Charlie said as he ended the call and shoved his phone in to his pocket.  He glanced at Tori who was still keeping her distance.  “Can you help us?” He mouthed. He knew there was no way he could hold Nick’s weight by himself but he also knew Nick probably was in no stable way to walk, unaided.  Tori nodded quickly as she rushed over.  Charlie crouched down again as he reached out to touch Nick’s face. The older boys eyes immediately flew open.  “Hey, ssshh.” Charlie said softly as he gripped is hand.  “It’s alright. I’m going to take you home, Ok?” He said. “Your mum is coming to pick us up.”  He watched as Nick began to calm down again. “Ok.” He whispered. He allowed Charlie and Tori to help him on to his feet and begin to guide him out of the woods and towards the main road. He was exhausted. He just wanted to sleep. 

Sarah didn’t know what she was expecting when she pulled up on the side of the road. She quickly got out the car spotting Charlie and Nick and a girl, resembling Charlie so she could only assume this was Tori- Charlie’s older sister. Sarah studied her son’s face.  His face was pale, too pale for her liking, he was trembling and had dark bags under his eyes.  Her maternal instincts quickly took over as she brought her hand up to rest on Nick’s forehead. She frowned. She had been expecting to find him feverish but apart from his skin feeling a little bit clammy, his temperature felt completely normal.  “No fever.” She commented.  “What’s wrong sweetheart?” She asked.  Nick just shrugged in response, refusing to make eye contact with Sarah, which wasn’t like him at all. “Migraine.” He muttered quietly.   Sarah eyed him up more closely, spotting the puke stain on the front of his shirt. The stale smell of vomit hitting her nostrils.  “Have you thrown up, baby?”   She asked, concerned.  Nick glanced at her and followed her gaze down to his shirt. His face blushed red with embarrassment.  When had he vomited down himself? He didn’t remember that. He couldn’t remember much before Charlie finding him.  “Oh..uh…yeah.” He said quietly.  Sarah sighed. “Lets get you home to bed, sweetheart.” She said as she helped him in to the passenger seat. Nick glanced at Charlie.  “Can Charlie come?” He asked his mum in a small voice.  Sarah glanced at her wrist watch, there was still a good hour before Charlie’s know curfew and she couldn’t exactly say no to her poorly son, now, could she?  She glanced at Charlie who was wearing the same hopeful grin as her son.  ‘As long as you let your parent’s know then it’s alright with me.” She smiled.  Charlie smiled gratefully.  He glanced at Tori who gave him a nod of approval.   Sarah smiled at the young girl, extending out her hand. “Im Sarah.” She smiled warmly.  “You must be Victoria.”   Tori returned the smile and accepted the handshake. “Tori!” She smiled. “Do you want a lift home, love? We’re going that way anyway.”  Tori smiled but softly shook her head.  “That’s Ok, thanks. My dad’s picking me up soon.” She then glanced at Charlie.  “I’ll see you at home.”  Charlie smiled at his sister and mouthed a ‘Thank you’ before climbing into the back of the car.  Nick had wasted no time in resting his head against the cool window, his eyes closed. He was knackered. Panic attacks were exhausting.  ‘I told you the you should have put a hat on.’ Sarah said softly as she started the engine.  “Probably just a touch of Sun stroke.” 

Chapter Text

Charlie stared through the glass window of the hospital room watching the rise and fall of Nick’s chest as he breathed slowly. He was asleep which Charlie was glad about. It was the first time in days that he’d been able to rest. He glanced at the sign on the door:

DO NOT ENTER WITHOUT AUTHORISATION

STRICTLY MEDICAL STAFF ONLY

PATIENT IMMUNE COMPROMISED

PPE MUST BE WORN BEFORE ENTRY

God he wished he was allowed in to sit with him. He’d been quarantined in that small room for 4 days now. 4 days without being able to hug him, hold his hand and help to alleviate the boredom of being in that room alone. Nick had been through such an ordeal the past couple of weeks. He had been so poorly. Charlie thought back to that innocent text he had received from Nick when it all began…..

2 weeks earlier

Nick: hey babe I’m not at school today. Feel like shit and have come out in a weird rash! 😭 mum says I have to stay home in case I’m contagious.

Charlie read the message with a frown. School without Nick sucked. He hated form on his own. Though he didn’t fancy getting a rash too so maybe it was for the best. He sent him a quick reply full of sad emojis and get well soon vibes then pocketed his phone and headed for the bus stop. It was going to be a long day. Tori sat down beside him with her headphones in and they headed off to school. He text Nick throughout the day but didn’t hear much back. He hoped he was resting and feeling better. As he walked out of the school building at the end of the day he sent him a text

Charlie: are you allowed visitors? Can I come over?

Nick groaned as he heard his phone ping with a message. His head was banging and the idea of looking at his screen was not appealing. He cracked one eye open and saw Charlie’s name on his Lock Screen. He hauled himself into a sitting position only to be hit with a hacking cough that made his head hurt even more. Sarah popped her head into his room, “Nick baby how are you feeling?” She frowned taking in his disheveled appearance and listening to him cough. She perched on the side of the bed and placed her hand on his forehead, hissing at the heat coming off him. “Oh baby you are burning up!” He groaned, taking a sip of water from the glass by his bed. “I feel like death,” he sighed sinking back against his pillow. “And I’m itchy.” Sarah gently lifted up his sweaty t shirt to examine the rash that had appeared on his cheeks and neck this morning, noticing that it had already spread all down his chest and stomach. “I think we might need to pop to the doctors darling,” she said softly, ignoring his huff of protest. “This rash doesn’t look like one I’ve seen before, I want someone to take a look at you.”

Nick sighed loudly, he hated the doctors. But he really did feel absolutely awful so  he guessed his mum was right. He watched her warily as she called the surgery, explaining his symptoms which were apparently serious enough to warrant an emergency appointment. Sarah bustled around the room finding him some clean comfy clothes and then leaving him to change while she fed Nellie and let her out. Nick struggled into his clothes. He was so tired. He remembered the text from Charlie and replied quickly

Nick: mums dragging me to the doctor I’ll text you when we get home and let you know what happens.

He saw it immediately marked as read and then the dots as Charlie started replying

Charlie: not feeling any better then? Hope it goes ok I love you ❤️

Nick pocketed his phone and made his way slowly down the stairs to where his mum was waiting. She ushered him into his shoes and coat and then into the car. He leaned his hot head against the cool glass of the car window and shut his eyes. The bright lights felt like they were piercing his skull. Sarah glanced at him anxiously. She had a bad feeling about this. Nick had deteriorated so quickly. Yesterday he had a bit of a cold but today he just looked dreadful. And the rash made her feel uneasy. It didn’t look like a meningitis rash, she’d even done the glass test on him much to his amusement. But it also didn’t look like the viral rashes he’d had in the past. She patted his knee as she drove the short distance to the surgery. “Won’t be long sweetheart and you can get back in bed.’   The doctors wasn’t too busy. They were winding down at the end of the day and had squeezed Nick in as an emergency last appointment. Because he had a rash they didn’t want him waiting on the waiting room in case he was contagious. So he and Sarah had been directed to a small little side room to wait. That suited Nick fine. He closed his eyes and leaned back in his chair. The only noise was his occasional coughing fit. Sarah stroked his back gently which led him to hiss in discomfort. “I think the rash is on my back too.” He admitted. Sarah felt her heart sink. “It’s ok baby, the doctors won’t be long.”

Sarah was right and they were soon called in to see a cheery young GP who said his name was Dr Roberts. He examined Nick carefully, listening to his symptoms. After studying his rash he had Nick put his top back on and gestured to the chair next to Sarah.

“Well this looks like a classic case of measles. Textbook case in fact.” Sarah looked at him in horror. Measles? But Nick had been vaccinated as a small child. Surely that was impossible  “Measles? Are you sure? Nicky has had all his vaccinations. I don’t understand.”  The doctor smiled sympathetically. “Unfortunately vaccinations are not 100% accurate. There’s a nasty strain going about at the moment. Nick has just been unlucky I’m afraid.” Nick slumped down. Measles, that was a little kids disease. Of course he had to catch something embarrassing like that. He listened half heartedly as the doctor explained that he needed to rest, keep up the fluids and take painkillers to bring the temperature down. It was normal to be sensitive to the light so closing the curtains and avoiding screens would help. He had to stay off school for the next 4 days so he didn’t infect anyone else.  Sarah thanked the doctor and they returned to the car. “I’m going to pop to the shop on the way home for some more tablets for you. Want anything else?”  Nick shook his head, “just Charlie.” He sighed. He was feeling sorry for himself and wanted boyfriend cuddles. “I’m sorry baby. He won’t be allowed over while you have that rash. Why don’t you FaceTime him when we get in hmm?” She gave him a gentle squeeze on his sore arm then drove to the nearest supermarket. Nick sat in the car waiting, he felt a tear slip down his cheek. God he was pathetic to cry over this but he felt really sorry for himself and he really did feel awful. He’d thought measles was just a rash but he felt like shit. His body felt like it could sleep for a week.

When they got home he went straight up to his room and crawled back into bed. Sarah followed him, closing the curtains and putting on his fairy lights so the brightness didn’t hurt his eyes. “I’ll bring you up some dinner darling. Think you can manage some tea and toast?” Nick nodded slowly. He reached into his pocket and sent a video call request to Charlie who answered on the first ring. Clearly he’d been waiting to find out what happened at the doctors.   Charlie could hardly mask his gasp when he seen the state of his boyfriend.  Nick’s hair was tossled, his skin was pale, apart from his cheeks that were rosy with fever, his eyes were glassed over.  He could have swore he seen a couple of pimples decorating Nick’s forehead but that wasn’t important right now. Nick looked poorlier than ever. “You don’t look well, at all..” he said softly.“What did the doctor say?” Nick let out a massive, heavy sigh as his cheeks burned even redder.“It’s…it’s  embarrassing.” He muttered.Charlie frowned.“What do you mean? Did they tell you what’s wrong?”“Yeah…” Nick responded as he flopped against his pillows.“So?” Charlie pressed, confused as to why Nick was delaying telling him what had happened at the GP office.  Nick sighed again.  “I’ve got measles…”   Charlie’s eyes widened.  He was not expecting that.

  “Measles? Wha- are they sure?”    Nick nodded.  “It’s a confirmed case of textbook measles apparently.” He shrugged.  “Mum demanded a second opinion. She got David and me vaccinated when we were little but according to the doctor, you can still get it.”    “That sucks.” Charlie pouted.  “I won’t be in school for the next 4 days as I’m still contagious.” Nick sighed.   “I take it I can’t come see you?” Charlie asked. Knowing the answer was probably an obvious no.  Nick shook his head softly.  “I wouldn’t want you to catch this. I feel like crap.” He pouted. “I just want a cuddle from you.”  “Aw babe.” Charlie sighed.  “I’ll give you extra cuddles when you’re not contagious anymore to make up for it.” He promised.  “Nick smirked. “I’ll keep you to that.” He was then cut off by another hacking coughing fit. His lungs feeling like they were on fire. Charlie winced. It really sounded like Nick was in pain.  “Did they give you anything to take?”  He asked.  “They can’t really prescribe anything for measles.” Nick sighed. “I’ve just to keep taking paracetamol and stay in bed.” He huffed.   “Look at it on the bright side, you get to skip school all week.” Charlie said, trying to lighten the mood.  “Yeah, I guess.” Nick agreed.  “I’m going to be so bored though.”   “You could have a movie marathon?” Charlie suggested.  “It’s not as fun without you.” Nick pouted. Charlie couldn’t help but chuckle slightly. Nick was definitely 10 times more clingier when he wasn’t feeling well.  Nick could hear voices in the background of the call.  Charlie sighed. “I have to go to go have dinner. I’ll call you back later if you want?”  Nick smiled, but was cut off by a yawn. He was so exhausted.  “Or maybe not. You should probably rest.”   Nick sighed. “I’m so tired.” He admitted. “But I want to talk to you again later.”   Charlie smiled. Nick was such a simp.  “I’ll tell you what. I’ll text you later and if you’re still awake then I’ll FaceTime you again. Deal?” He negotiated.  “Deal.” Nick grinned as waved goodbye as Charlie disappeared from the screen just as he heard a gentle knock on his bedroom door.

Sarah opened the door and slipped in to the room, carrying a tray with an excited Nellie hot on her heels. Nellie instantly jumped up on to Nick’s bed and curled up beside him. She could always sense when her big brother was feeling poorly.  Nick smiled softly as he ran his fingers through her soft fur.  “Hello Nellie. Who’s a good girl, eh?”  Sarah watched them fondly as she sat the tray on the side. She’d made Nicky some lightly buttered toast with a mug of tea.  Nick glanced at the plate and grimaced slightly. He didn’t feel like he had much of an appetite but he also hadn’t eaten anything since dinner last night, which he had only eaten half of. Sarah caught the look of disgust on his face. “Not hungry?” She asked softly as she sat on the edge of the bed, brushing his fringe back with her fingers. She hissed at the heat she felt there.  Nick shook his head. “Can you try a few bites, darling?” She questioned, knowing the paracetamol would probably work better if he had something lining his stomach.  Nick pouted softly but agreed to try a little bit. Sarah smiled, satisfied as she placed the plate of toast on to his lap. Nick tore the toasted bread in to bite sized pieces and nibbled on some. He managed to eat one slice before pushing the plate away. “Well done, baby.” Sarah smiled as handed him his tea which he gratefully sipped. She popped out two paracetamol capsules from the blister packet and placed them in Nick’s palm which he wasted no time in swallowing them, chasing them down with his tea and a grimace.  God. He must feel really rotten as he never even put up a fight about taking pills. Nick rolled his eyes as he spotted the thermometer on the tray as Sarah reached for it. He just wanted to sleep but he knew his mother wouldn’t allow him to until she had checked his temperature, which he knew would probably be rather high, seeing as he felt like a furnace, turned up on full.  Sarah removed the cap from the ear thermometer and placed the tip of it in to Nick’s right ear.  He winced. His ear felt a little achey. Sarah didn’t notice as she held the device there for a reading. It beeped after a few seconds. She glanced at the reading, her eyes wide.  38.7° C. The was far too right for her not to worry.  “Definitely a fever, sweetheart.” She sighed as she kissed his warm forehead. “Hopefully the medicine will bring it down.” She fixed the blankets, tucking him in as Nellie cuddled closer in to his side.  “Get some sleep, darling. I’ll check in on you later.”    Nick just gave her a sleepy nod as his eyes drifted closed, sleep claiming his body. He felt completely and utterly exhausted.

Over the course of the next few days. Nick remained the same. He slept mostly. His cough had intensified and he had started complaining about earache much to Sarah’s concern. She’d been straight on the phone to NHS 24, who explained that Nick’s symptoms were all linked with the Measles and that sometimes virus caused ear infection so Nick was prescribed some antibiotics, which his auntie Diane very kindly picked up and dropped off in the afternoon.  She didn’t stay long and kept her distance on the doorstep as Nick was still contagious and they didn’t want to risk her being infected or spreading it to her twins.  She dropped the little paper pharmacy bag off as well as some of Nick’s favourite juice and chocolate for when he was feeling a little better and a Formula 1 magazine. She’d also picked up some cough medicine as Sarah was concerned about Nicky’s cough. She then left wishing her nephew a speedy recovery.   Sarah had taken the week off work herself. Nicky was too sick for her to comfortably leave him alone.  Day 4 came and went. Nick was far from recovery. He just dozed on and off. He’d watched a couple of movies but he’d be lucky if he’d managed to watch one all the way through from start to finish. Sarah was worried about her son’s lack of appetite. He’d barely eaten anything over the last few days. He’d managed some toast and about half a bowl of soup. She was managing to keep him hydrated though endless cups of tea and juice. There was no improvement in Nick’s condition by the time Monday came back around. His cough had developed into a wet, chesty sounding bark. The rash had faded a little but was still present on his cheeks, chest and torso. He was still running one hell of a fever and his ears were hurting.  Sarah placed the phone back on the hook after calling Nick out of school again and herself out of work. She climbed the stairs and entered Nick’s room.  She couldn’t help but feel alarm bells and an unnerving feeling in the pit of her stomach. It had been a week since Nick had been diagnosed with measles. Doctor Robert had explained that Nick had probably already been exposed to the disease for around 7-10 days before his symptoms appeared and that he should not be contagious after around 4-5 days. He had explained that he would be able to return to school then but he was in absolutely no fit state for that.  Nick just seemed to be getting worse instead of better.  

She glanced at her son who was curled up in her, the duvet tangled around him. Nellie was sat up on the bed keeping a protective and watchful eye over her brother.   “Oh Nell’s, our boy isn’t well at all, is he?” Sarah said as she ruffled Nellie’s fur and perched on the edge of the bed. Nick let out a little painful whimper as he reached his hand up to his left ear. His face scrunched up in discomfort.  “Oh baby.” Sarah cooed. “Are your ears still hurting?”  She’d thought the antibiotics would have started to kick in by now.  Nick mumbled a confirmation as he rolled over on to his back, not even bothering to open his eyes. He felt awful.   Sarah laid her hand on his forehead, hopeful that his fever had maybe broken during the night but it hadn’t.  She hissed as she felt the head radiating off him. He was burning up, more so than before. “I don’t feel well.” Nick muttered as he brung his knees up to his chest, curling on to his side again. Shivering.  “I know, baby, I know.” Sarah soothed as she reached out for the thermometer on the side.    He winced as the thermometer was placed in his ear, “sorry baby,” Sarah said softly. She hated causing him more discomfort. The thermometer beeped and she gently removed it, Nick immediately holding his sore ear as he lay shivering. “Oh my goodness, 41.7.” Sarah could not disguise the panic in her voice. That was dangerously high. “Mum….” Nick whispered, his eyes were open but unfocused, darting around the room. “mum what’s that smell?” Sarah felt her heart rate increasing. “Smell? I can’t smell anything baby,” she stroked his sweaty hair off his forehead. Nick frowned, “it smells weird in here….i feel really strange mum….”his words began to slur as he fought to keep his eyes open. “My arms feel all tingly…..I think……” suddenly Nick stopped speaking, Sarah watched in horror as his eyes literally rolled into the back of his head and he started convulsing. “Nick!” Sarah shrieked, all pretence of calm vanished as she watched her boy have a seizure in front of her. His face was twisted into an unnatural position and his arms and legs were jerking painfully. He looked to be in pain, he was making groaning noises. Sarah  didn’t know what to do. Was she meant to hold him still or let him move? She didn’t want to hurt him. “It’s ok baby,” she tried to soothe him, unsure if he could hear her. Grabbing her mobile she dialled 999. “Please help my son is having a siezure, oh god please I don’t know if he’s breathing.” She began to sob, her breathing laboured as she panicked.

The man on the phone tried to calm her down enough to get her location and assured her that an ambulance was on the way. “Leave him room to move. Don’t try to keep him still, just make sure there’s nothing near him he can hurt himself on.” Sarah moved the bedside table out the way so his arms wouldn’t catch on it and then gently sat down beside him stroking his hair and uttering soothing noises. She felt numb. Something was very wrong with Nick, this couldn’t just be measles anymore. Gradually the seizure began to subside and Nicks movements slowed. He didn’t regain consciousness though which filled her with even more dread. Her attention was drawn to the voice on the loudspeaker, “Mrs Nelson the ambulance should be with you in 2 minutes. Make sure the front door is unlocked so they can get in.” Sarah took the stairs two at a time and opened the front door, securing Nellie in the lounge. She sped back upstairs to find Nick exactly as she left him, laying on his side, drenched in sweat, his eyes closed. His breathing was shallow. “It’s going to be ok my darling,” she soothed, gently stroking his hair. Nick didn’t respond. She heard sounds from downstairs, relief flooding through her at the thought that help was coming. “Up here!” She shouted, not wanting to leave Nick alone again Two paramedics appeared at the doorway, large bags and medical kit slung over their shoulders.   “Hello, I’m Paul, this is Sean,” the older of the two men introduced themselves. “Can you tell us what’s happened?” they placed their equipment down on the floor by the bed and immediately began checking Nicks vitals.  “Um…..Nick was diagnosed with measles about a week ago. The doctors said he’d be better by now but every day he just seems to be worse. His temperature was so high and he…he just had a seizure and now he won’t wake up.” Sarah choked out the information with a sob. Sean gave her a reassuring pat on the shoulder before crouching by Nick’s head.

“Nick, can you hear me?” He shook his shoulders gently. Nick let out a groan. He didn’t open his eyes but his mouth opened slightly. “That’s it, well done. Nick you’ve had a seizure so we are going to take you into hospital to find out what’s going on, ok?”   Nick felt like he was in a fog. His entire body was screaming at him in pain. What the hell had happened? He could vaguely make out someone talking to him but his brain felt like it needed rebooting. He couldn’t follow the conversation at all. He felt so poorly. He couldn’t understand why his body felt like he’d been in a fight. He hadn’t had he? He remembered being at home in bed like he had been for the past week. None of this made sense. He felt a scratch in his arm and some pressure. Something was placed over his nose and mouth and cool oxygen started to flow. He groaned in pain as he felt himself being moved from his bed. Just leave him to sleep.   Sarah watched on helplessly as the paramedics inserted an IV and gave Nick oxygen. They brought up a gurney and carefully manoeuvred him onto it. Her heart broke as she heard him moaning in pain as they moved him. Paul tried to reassure her, “he’s bound to feel sore after the seizure. I’m afraid we can’t give him any pain relief we need to get him seen at the hospital first. His temperature is still extremely high so we want to get him in quickly.” Sarah nodded her understanding, grabbing her phone and following them down the stairs. Nick still had his eyes closed he looked so poorly and uncomfortable as he was jostled down the stairs.   “I take it mum you are coming with us?” Sean asked kindly as they loaded Nick onto the ambulance. Sarah nodded determinedly. Her mind was reeling with everything that had happened and what she needed to do. The ambulance had been spotted by the neighbours who had come out of their house to see what had happened. “Sarah what’s going on?” Sarah sighed. Her neighbours were elderly and very well meaning but also extremely nosey. “Nicks not well,” she said not wanting to elaborate more. “Oh god I’m sorry Sarah can we do anything to help? Want us to watch Nellie for you while you are out?” Sarah nodded gratefully. Actually that would be really helpful. They already had a spare key for emergencies. “That would be amazing actually. Can she stay with you tonight?”

“Course, take as long as you need. We’ll enjoy the company won’t we love?” His wife nodded. “look after that lad love, he’s such a good boy.”   Sarah gave them a small smile and climbed into the back of the ambulance. They pulled out of the driveway, then turned on the lights and sirens as they increased their speed. Sarah held on tight to Nick’s feet, the only part of him she could reach from her seat. “It’ll be ok baby.” She soothed. “The doctors will figure this out and get you better…”  Sean, who was busy monitoring Nick and fiddling with his IV drip smiled at her, “he’s going to be well looked after. We’ve radioed ahead so they are expecting him. Try not to be alarmed at the speed everything happens when we arrive. Their priority will be getting that temperature down first to avoid another seizure as we expect that’s what’s caused it. They’ll have lots of questions for you about his recent medical history just answer as thoroughly as you can.” Sarah nodded gratefully. She could do this, she would be strong for Nicky.

Sarah followed quickly as Nick was rushed through the double doors of the hospital that lead to the examination bays. She watched as Sean, the paramedic did a handover with the charge doctor. “This is Nicholas Nelson. He’s 17 and last week was diagnosed with a textbook case of Measles. Temperature is currently 41.8° C, seizure was triggered.  IV cannula and oxygen have administered. Patient has regained consciousness but is severely disoriented and lethargic…”  Sarah listened on as they exchanged medical jargon, she couldn’t take her eyes off of her son, though.  He looked so little lay there on that stretcher, curled up on his side, he was shivering and whimpering softly.  She felt a pang of mum guilt. Nick has been deteriorating a little more each day. Why hadn’t she phoned an ambulance earlier? She’s known something hasn’t been right with Nicky, she just couldn’t place her finger on it.   “Mummy…” Nick whispered, barely audible, but Sarah was able to hear him as she stroked his damp hair, desperate to provide him with some comfort.  “I’m here, baby, Mummy's here.” She assured him as she stroked his cheek.  Nick’s eyes fluttered as if he was struggling to keep them open.   “You must be mum?” A nurse asked Sarah as came up beside the bed and she placed a heart rate monitor on to Nick’s finger.  Sarah nodded.  “Can you list all of your son’s symptoms for me please?” Sarah nodded as she blinked back her own tears, seeing her child so ill was breaking her heart.  “His temperature has been at about 39 all week, but it just spiked this morning.” She explained. “He’s had ear pain, headache and a chesty cough and he’s been extremely tired..” she listed off all of Nicky’s symptoms one by one.  The nurse nodded as she uncapped a syringe and needle.  “I’m just going to draw some blood which will give us a clearer idea of what’s been going on.” She said before turning her attention to Nick who was fighting so hard to stay awake.  “Just a little nip, poppet.” She explained as she inserted the needle in to a vein in Nick’s arm. He barely reacted apart from a little hiss when he felt the needle.  “Well done, darling.” Sarah told him as she squeezed his free hand.  Once she had taken the blood, she sent it down to be tested. Nick was then administered some paracetamol and ibuprofen through his IV. The door opened and two more nurses entered armed with ice packs.  “Let’s get this temperature down, shall we.”    “We’re going to try cooling Nicholas down with cold sponges and ice packs, if that is unsuccessful we may need to place him on a cooling blanket.”  April, the lead nurse said as she removed Nick’s sweat soaked t-shirt. She tucked two ice packs in at his neck, under his armpits and behind his knees. Nick shuddered instantly as the cold temperatures were a shock to the system.  “I know it’s cold, love.” The older nurse said softly as she used a cold sponge to dab at his forehead.  Sarah could only watch on helplessly as they treated her son. She watched as Nick’s teeth began to chatter. She knew they weren’t doing it to be cruel, they had to get his core temperature back down to a safe level to prevent him having another seizure but it was upsetting seeing him like this and not being able to do anything to help. They continued to cool Nick down for a further 15 minutes.  “C-cold.” Nick stuttered. His whole body shivering as they replaced the cold sponges with even colder water.  “I know, darling…” Sarah soothed.  “How much longer?” She asked one of the nurses.  “Not long now, petal.”

After another five minutes the ice packs were removed and Nick’s temperature was taken again, luckily it had gone down to a more manageable reading. 38.9. Still a lot higher than it should be but easier to handle.   Nick was changed into a hospital gown and tucked under a light blanket.  He was fighting sleep again.   His whole body was exhausted. The seizure earlier along with the illness cursing through his body have wiped him out.  “You can sleep now if you want, love.” April told him before turning to Sarah.  “There’s not much we can do other than keep him comfortable until we get his blood results back, the lab are rushing them so hopefully we should know more soon.”  Nick didn’t have to be told twice as he allowed his body to drift off in to a deep slumber. Sarah remained holding his hand.  “He’s stable now. Why don’t you go get yourself a cup of tea?”  April smiled, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. Sarah hesitated for a moment. She didn’t want to leave Nick’s side. What if he woke up asking for her? What if something happened?   “He’s in good hands. I promise you.” April smiled kindly. Sarah placed Nick’s hand back down on to the mattress and stood up. She could do with stretching her legs and a hot, sweet tea is exactly what she needs after the shock she has been through.  She also had to inform Diane, David and Stephane of what had happened and Charlie. Oh Charlie. He will be beside himself.   Sarah took one last look at her son, who was sleeping soundly before slipping out of the room. She stumbled across a hot drinks machine just at the end of the corridor and purchased herself a tea, she stirred in 3 sugar packets before slumping down in to one of the seats in the hall.  She couldn’t believe the events of the morning. She hoped she’d never have to witness anything as scary as that ever again.  She took her mobile out of her handbag and dialled her sister’s number.  She needed to talk to someone. 

It rang a few times before Diane’s cheery voice was heard on the other end.  “Morning Sis. How’s my handsome nephew feeling today?”  Sarah let out a shaky sob. She’d held herself together long enough . “Oh Di..” she choked out.   “Sarah?” Diane asked, her voice thick with concern.  “What’s wrong?” She asked, a horrible feeling creeping in to the pit of her stomach.   “It’s Nicky.” Sarah cried.  “He’s so poorly…we…we’re at the hospital.”    “What?!” Diane exclaimed.  “What’s happened??” She didn’t want to imagine her nephew being so unwell that he’s been hospitalised.   “His fever spiked to nearly 42.”  Diane gasped. "Oh my.."  “He had a seizure.” Sarah explained.  “I’m so scared, Di, they’ve took bloods. I don’t think it’s the measles anymore. I…I think something serious is wrong.” She said, feeling sick to her stomach as endless possibilities ran through her mind.   “What hospital?” Diane asked. She’d already put her coat on and had grabbed her keys. She wasn’t due in work until the afternoon but this was way more important.   “Victoria.” Sarah answered. “I’m on my way, you’re not going through this in your own.” Diane said firmly.  “Thank you…” Sarah replied. She needed her sister, now more than ever.  She ended the call and then called her ex husband and eldest son. She got no reply from either so she was forced to leave voicemails. It wasn’t the kind of news that she wanted to leave on and answering machine but they’d left her with no choice. She then called Charlie.  He didn’t answer, either. Of course. He didn’t. He was in school. She quickly typed out a text message asking him to give her a call whenever he saw her message. She just left it at that. She’d rather tell Charlie, personally.  She let out a heavy sigh, wiping tears from her face and took a large sip of her tea. The warm, sugary liquid proving her with immediate comfort. Suddenly the double doors at the end of corridor swung open and a swarm of medical professionals ran past her. Whatever they were attending to, looked urgent. She sighed, hoping it wasn’t too serious.  Her heart stopped when she heard one of them shout out.  “Emergency  situation. Room 22.”    That was the room Nicky was in. She stood up immediately her legs taking her as fast as they could down the corridor.    

Chapter Text

An alarm was sounding in the corridor as Sarah raced towards Nicks room “Code blue room 22…..code blue room 22.” As she reached the doorway her way was blocked by a nurse. “I’m sorry, you can’t come in, if you just wait out here someone will be with you as soon as they can.” Sarah’s eyes widened as she tried desperately to see what was going on behind the nurse. “Please he’s my son I need to get in there,” she tried to push her way through but the nurse held her still. She watched anxiously from the doorway. Her heart plummeted as she caught a glimpse of what was happening.
Nick was laid flat out on the bed, his gown lowered so his bare chest was visible. She watched in horror as the doctor attached two pads to his chest before shouting “clear” and shocking him. She watched his chest rise, then fall. Sarah felt like her heart had stopped too. She didn’t want to breathe until Nick did. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing. The nurse had said he was stable and she was safe to leave him. How could she have left him, he must have been so scared.
The doctor repeated his motions again and again until finally she heard him declare, “he’s back with us.” Sarah collapsed to the floor and put her head in her hands. Thank god. The nurse put a hand on her shoulder, “he’s a fighter your boy, come on you can come back in and see him now.”
Sarah immediately hauled herself up and raced to Nick’s side. He was covered in more wires monitoring him, the oxygen mask was back on his face and he had 2 IVs in now. He looked so pale. So poorly. But she could hear the steady rhythm of his heart beating on the monitor as she picked up his hand gently. “Nick, baby? I’m here, mums here. You are doing so well sweetheart, just hang in there ok?”
Nick’s eyes fluttered open at the sound of his mums voice. He fought his way out of the fog of his brain. His chest felt like it was on fire. Like he’d been kicked repeatedly in the ribs. He tried to focus his eyes but it was too difficult. So he just looked in the direction of the voice. He opened his mouth to speak but could only manage a groan. Something was covering his mouth. He tried to lift his hand up to pull whatever it was off him but he felt a hand gently guiding his arm back down. “Shh, it’s ok baby, don’t try to take the mask off it’s helping you breathe.” His mums soft voice was soothing and calm amidst the chaos. He sighed and nodded slowly, “does it hurt anywhere sweetheart?” He could hear the worry in her voice and he didn’t want to make her panic but he hurt everywhere. So he nodded, closing his eyes once more against the bright lights on the ceiling.
Sarah looked over at the nurse. “Can he have something for the pain?” The nurse checked his chart, “I’m sorry, he’s already had a low dose and we need his bloods back before we prescribe him anything else. Just try to keep him calm ok?” Sarah sighed but nodded her understanding.

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Charlie sat at the back of his maths class, watching the clock tick on the wall. He was on countdown, his last class of the day before the weekend. Finally the bell went and he gathered up his pencil case and books, immediately pulling out his phone to see if he’d had a text from Nick. He was getting really worried about him. He’d been poorly for so long. He’d hoped by now that he would be back at school but he’d text him earlier this morning that he was still in bed. Charlie was hoping he’d be allowed to go and see him tonight as he surely wasn’t still contagious after this many days. He opened up his phone and his heart skipped a beat as he saw a missed call and a message from Sarah. She’d text him an hour ago. He felt uneasy, why was Sarah messaging him? He got on really well with his hopeful future mother in law but they weren’t yet at the texting stage of their relationship. “Ready to go?” Tao approached him, they weren’t allowed to sit together anymore as they had chatted too much so Tao had been moved to the front to help him concentrate. He frowned as he saw the look on Charlie’s face, “what’s wrong?” Charlie showed him the message. “Why would Sarah be calling me? Why not Nick?” Tao paled, he had a bad feeling about this but seeing the panicked look on his friends face he squashed it down. “Well, only one way to find out Charlie boy!” He smiled at him. “Phone her back!” Charlie wasted no time in calling her as they walked out of the building into the afternoon sunshine.

Sarah was stroking Nick’s hand, murmuring reassurances to him as he lay quietly. She felt her phone vibrating in her pocket and pulled it out, seeing Charlie’s name on the screen. She glanced at the time, 3.17 school had finished. “I’ll be right back sweetheart, I’ll be just at the door ok?” Nick didn’t respond, he’d nodded back off again.
Taking a deep breath Sarah walked into the corridor and clicked accept.
“Hi Sarah is everything ok?” Charlie sounded worried which wasn’t surprising. Sarah had never called him before. She could hear the hustle and bustle of school kicking out time in the background, he was obviously still at Truham. “Hello love, thank you for calling me back.” She hesitated, unsure of how much to tell him over the phone but knowing he needed to be told. “Is anyone with you love?”
Charlie swallowed down his rising panic, “um yeah, Tao is with me, why? Sarah you’re scaring me.” Tao’s eyes widened as he listened to half the conversation.
“Ok. Listen Charlie I don’t want you to panic but Nick is in the hospital.”
“What?” Charlie gasped, “why’s he in hospital?” He stopped walking as they neared the picnic benches and sat down. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“He was really poorly and his temperature was really high.” She paused, “Charlie he had a seizure so I had to call the ambulance.” Charlie felt like he was going to be sick. “A seizure?” He whispered, hearing Tao gasp next to him. “He’s ok though yeah?”
Sarah pinched the bridge of her nose. She didn’t know how to tell him. “Well, the doctors are looking after him and trying to figure out what’s going on…..but Charlie you need to know that earlier this afternoon his heart stopped beating and they needed to resuscitate him.” She waited to hear a response but could only make out Charlie’s irregular breathing. “They got him back sweetheart, he’s alive. Did you hear me?” She heard a sob, “he’s not dead?” Charlie whispered so quietly she could have misssd it. “No darling I promise, I’m looking at him right now.”
“Can I come and see him? Please?” He begged. Sarah sighed. “I don’t know if you’ll be allowed to come and visit but I understand if you need to be here. Why don’t you go home and speak to your mum. See if she can bring you over.”
Charlie thanked her and hung up looking at Tao with a devastated expression. “What’s going on Charlie?” Tao gently squeezed his shoulders helping to ground him. “Nick had a seizure?” Charlie nodded, tears pooling in his eyelashes. “He stopped breathing Tao. He nearly died” he sobbed out. Tao quickly pulled Charlie into a hug and held him as he cried. Nick nearly died? From the measles? None of this was making sense. He felt completely helpless.

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Diane arrived at the hospital a little over 45 minutes after speaking to her sister. She’d have liked to have been there a lot sooner but she had to sort out after school childcare for her kids and inform her husband about what had happened. She rushed in to the main reception area, speaking to the kind receptionist who pointed her in the right direction. She frowned in discovering that she had been pointed in the direction of the examination rooms. Surely Nick wasn’t still here? He’d been at the hospital for over 2 hours by this point. Hadn’t he been admitted to a ward yet? Diane paused as she spotted a hot drinks machine and she purchased two coffee’s. She knew her older sister and knew that she would probably be in desperate need of a caffeine fix right now. She arrived outside room 22. She could see Sarah sitting in the centre of the room, holding on to Nick’s hand. Oh my. Her heart crumbled at the sight of her nephew. He looked very sick. The wires and monitors that were connected to almost every visible part of his body. Sarah looked physically and mentally exhausted. Her eyes were closed and she clasped on to Nick’s hand tightly, holding it close to her cheek. Every now and then she would place a gentle kiss on his knuckles. Diane gently tapped on the glass window, watching as Sarah’s eyes snapped over and she glanced over in the direction of the window. Oh thank god. She thought seeing her younger sister. She gentle placed her son’s hand back on the mattress, tracing it with her finger. “I’ll be right back, my darling…” she soothed. “You just keep sleeping..”

Sarah slipped out of the room and straight in to her sister’s open arms. “Oh Diane…thank god you’re here.” She said tearfully. Diane held her sister tight. “Of course I’m here Sarah…I meant what I said on the phone, you’re not doing this alone.” Sarah pulled back from the embrace after a couple of minutes. She let out a shaky breath as a couple of tears rolled down his face. “His heart stopped, Di.” She whispered. “Nicky stopped breathing…”. Diane gasped. “What?” She asked. Her eyes widened in horror. “During the seizure?” She questioned. Sarah shook her head softly. “No…uh…after I ended our call. I saw some doctors rushing towards the room. They were screaming all sorts of things I didn’t understand but I knew it was bad…so I followed them.” She explained, recalling the second most frightening things she’s ever witnessed, the first being the seizure that Nick had suffered. “They wouldn’t let me in to the room.” She sighed, sniffing as more tears fell. “They just told me that Nick had gone in to respiratory failure and suffered a cardiac arrest, they had to resuscitate him, Di.” She cried falling in to her sister’s arms again. Diane held her close, feeling the tears prick at her own eyes. She couldn’t believe this had happened. Nick had measles. Lots of kids get measles. How on earth could it have resulted in this?

“Have they said anything else?” Sarah shook her head. “We’re still waiting on the results.” “Can I come in and see him?” Diane asked. Sarah sighed. “They’re not letting anyone in until we know what we’re dealing with…” Diane nodded. Totally understanding that but she needed to be there. She needed to stay close. “You go back in, he needs his mum by his side. I’ll just stick around out here until the doctor comes and sees us, Ok?” Sarah squeezed her sisters hand gratefully before giving her another hug. “Thank you.” She said sincerely before going back in to sit with her son.

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Charlie slipped off his shoes in the hallway, hanging his coat up on the peg. “I’m home.” He called. Wondering where everyone was? Tori was probably upstairs as she’d gotten the bus home whereas he’d walked with Tao. “In the kitchen, Charlie…” he heard his mum reply. He shuffled in to the kitchen, the smell of spices and vegetables hitting his nostrils. Jane stood by the chopping board wearing her apron as she diced some chicken into little pieces. “It’s chicken and vegetable pasta bake on your meal plan for tonight, is that Ok?” She asked as she turned around to face her son, instantly taking in his bloodshot eyes and tear stained face. “Charlie? What’s wrong?” She asked as she put the knife down and moved over to him. “It…it’s Nick.” He said, shakily. Jane frowned. She knew Nick has been poorly all week, of course she knows what. She’s been the one that’s had to deal with Charlie’s moping around as he hasn’t been able to visit. “Is everything ok? He’s not still under the weather is he?” She asked, in concern. It had been quite a while since he first fell unwell. “Nick is in hospital…”. Jane’s eyes went wide. “Hospital? Why?” Charlie blinked, trying to stop his tears, which were threatening to fall again. “Sarah had to call an ambulance this morning. Nick’s symptoms had worsened and his temperature spiked dangerously high..” He explained, watching the worry paint all over his mum’s face. “He had a seizure, mum..” He cried. “Oh my god..” Jane muttered as she pulled Charlie in to her chest as he began to sob. “Sarah called me when I was at school, so I called her back. Nick stopped breathing..” He said quietly. “He nearly died, mum.” Jane was speechless. She couldn’t believe that this had happened. She just held her son. Tori who had overheard the conversation, stood frozen at the kitchen door, holding on to a can of diet lemonade. “Is he going to be Ok?” She asked. She had become very fond of Nick recently. There wasn’t much between them in age. Nick was only a few month’s younger than her. She sometimes forgot that he wasn’t the same age as Charlie. “They’re waiting on some blood test results to find out what’s been making him so sick. I don’t think it’s the measles anymore..” Charlie replied. He pulled back and glanced at his mum. “Can you take me to the hospital?” Jane let out a small sigh. “I don’t think that is a good idea, sweetheart. I’m sure Sarah will let you know as soon as she hears anything.” “Please!” Charlie said desperately. “Charlie. They probably won’t let you anywhere near Nick right now..” “So??” He replied stubbornly. “Mum, I haven’t been able to see Nick for 10 days. I need him to know that I’m close. Even if I have to stay in the waiting room. Nick needs me, Sarah needs me. Please?’ He said, his tears threatening to start pouring again. He couldn’t handle if she said no. Jane sighed as she wiped her hands on a dish towel before tossing it in to the laundry basked. “Okay…” she said softly. “We’re not staying long though…”. Charlie nodded as he gave her a quick hug. That was better than not being able to go at all. “I’m coming, too.” Tori announced. Charlie gave he a soft smile. She was the best sister.

Sarah glanced up in horror at the door as it was suddenly thrown open and a team of doctors and nurses walked in. All dressed in sterile aprons, gloves, masks and visers. Sarah’s breath caught in her throat. This was like a scene out of a Sci-Fi movie. What was going on? April, the nurse that had been overseeing Nick’s care since he arrived was asked to leave the room. No explanation just that she wasn’t wearing the proper PPE required. Sarah didn’t understand. What did that mean? “I’m sorry mam, we’re going to have to ask you step outside. I’m afraid you can’t be in here…” Sarah glanced up at the doctor, wide eyed. “What? I…I’m not leaving him again.” She refused. She wouldn’t leave him. She couldn’t leave him. She had stepped out of the room for a few minutes earlier and look what had happened. She couldn’t risk that. She continued to squeeze Nick’s hand. He was asleep but she needed him to know that she was there. She needed him to be able to feel that she was there, right by his side. She suddenly felt her hand being prised away from Nick’s. “You cannot touch him.” The doctor told her firmly, but not unkind. Sarah blinked. What on earth did he mean that she couldn’t touch him? She was his mother. “What…What is going on?” She demanded, forcing herself on to her feet as the other medical professionals swarmed around her son, checking vitas, injecting clear liquids in to his IV. She heard a soft moan coming from Nick as they poked and prodded him, disturbing him from his slumber. “It’s Okay, baby.” She soothed. “It’s alright.” Was it? She wasn’t so sure anymore. “Nicholas bloods have come back.” Dr Jefferson informed her. “I’m afraid his white blood cell count is practically none existent which explains why his body has been unable to fight off infection…” Sarah felt like she had been punched in the stomach. She didn’t really know what was going on. What does this mean? Sarah watched as they removed the break from the hospital bed and began wheeling Nick towards the door. “Where are you taking him?” She shrieked. Why were they taking her little boy away? What was going on? “Nick’s immune system is completely compromised. His body has stopped producing antibodies to fight off bacteria and infection. The slightest germ could kill him.’ The doctor replied firmly. “We need to isolate him in a sterile environment.” “Mum…” She heard Nick’s small, terrified voice. He was awake. He must be so petrified. “It’s okay, darling.” She soothingly, reassured him. Trying to convince herself as much as him. “Someone will fill you in when we know a bit more.” The doctor told her before rushing out of the room, following the gurney. Sarah was left standing there alone, distressed and so confused. Nick’s immune system was wrecked? He’d probably been exposed to so much germs. She gasped. She’d been holding her baby hand. When was the last time she’d washed her hands. Not since arriving at the hospital. What if she had made things worse? Suddenly Diane appeared in the doorway, looking equally as horrified as Sarah after watching her nephew being whisked away down the corrdior. Sarah wasted no time in falling in to her sisters arms sobbing.

Charlie and Jane arrived at the hospital, Charlie’s stomach was in knots. He hadn’t heard anything from Sarah since he’d text her earlier, he hoped it was ok that he’d come. He just needed to be here, see Nick if he was allowed. They walked up to reception and gave Nicks name. The lady at the desk directed them towards a and e. “He’s not been admitted?” Jane asked, shocked that he might still be laying in accident and emergency after all he’d been through this afternoon. The lady was apologetic, “the system hasn’t updated with a new location for him so that’s your best bet for now. They’ll be able to point you in the right direction if he’s been moved.”
Charlie pulled his mums arm and started leading them towards the large double doors of a and e. His footsteps were getting quicker as he got closer to the doors.
They opened the door to the chaotic noises and sounds of accident and emergency. There were people waiting on chairs, laying on gurneys, it was noisy and overwhelming. Jane began to approach the reception desk when she spotted Sarah tucked in the corner of the waiting room with another lady. She was clearly very upset and being comforted. Jane felt a rush of cold go through her and stopped still. Why wasn’t she with Nick?
Charlie turned to his mum to see why she’d stopped, then followed her gaze to the corner of the room. He let out an involuntary sob as he saw Diane hugging a very upset Sarah. Oh god. What had happened? Was Nick still alive? Had he stopped breathing again? On shaking legs he walked up to the two women. “Sarah?” His voice was trembling, “what’s happened? Is Nick…..is he…..”he couldn’t get the words out.
Sarah startled at the sound of her name. Looking up she saw the wide, teary eyes of Charlie looking back at her. Hastily she wiped her eyes and stood up, opening her arms to allow him to hug her. “Oh sweetheart thank you for coming. I’m sorry if I have frightened you.” She took a breath before pulling back from him, patting the chair next to her. Charlie sat down hesitantly. “Where’s Nick?” He asked quietly.
Sarah sighed, “I don’t know.” She admitted. I was sitting with him about 20 minutes ago, then all these doctors and nurses came rushing in dressed head to toe in gowns, gloves and masks….they made me step back and they just wheeled him away. The doctor said his blood tests have shown that he has no white blood cells so he can’t fight any germs. Even a cold would kill him. They have taken him to isolation somewhere. I was told to wait here for news…..” she trailed off.
Charlie was in shock. How had this happened? “Was he awake?” He couldn’t bear the thought of Nick being whisked away on his own, frightened. Sarah nodded, “he’d been mostly asleep but he called for me as he was taken away,” her eyes filled with tears again. Where was her Nicky?

2 floors up Nick was in a daze. One minute he was resting, listening to his mum’s soothing words, the next she’d been pulled away from him and he was being wheeled away. The jostling of the trolley had made his aching muscles even more sore. His headache was pounding. His ribs were agony. The nurse had been kind, explaining through her mask that they needed to get him somewhere completely germ free so that he could work on building up his strength and get well. They had wheeled him into a small single room and begun hooking him back up to various machines. He was so tired. “Can I see my mum?” He whispered. The nurse smiled softly at him, “I’m sorry love, for a little while it’ll just be medical staff allowed in. We need to get you better ok? I’m going to give you something to help you sleep, you just work on resting.” If Nick felt well enough he would have panicked at this information but as she injected something into his IV and replaced the oxygen mask back on his mouth he felt himself drifting off.

“Mrs Nelson?” Sarah’s headache snapped up at the sound of her name across the room. She stood quickly and the doctor approached her. “Come with me?” Sarah started to follow the doctor, turning to gesture the others follow her. Jane squeezed Charlie’s hand as they followed Sarah into a small empty room. It had a sofa, a couple of chairs, a coffee table with a box of tissues on. It was the kind of room people received bad news in. Charlie felt his heart beating out of his chest as he sat on the sofa beside Sarah, his mum on his other side and Diane on one of the chairs.
“First of all I’m sorry for the abrupt way we took Nicholas earlier. That must have been frightening.” Sarah nodded, “is he ok?”
The doctor gave her a reassuring smile. “His condition is the same. His bloodwork set off a lot of alarm bells. His white blood count is virtually nil. We need white blood cells to help us fight off illnesses.” Sarah tried to take the information in. “What caused it?”
“It’s a rare side effect of the measles unfortunately. “ the doctor explained. “It’s why he couldn’t fight off the virus.”
Sarah paused to process the news, “so where is he now? And what happens now? How do we get his blood count back?”
The doctor leaned forward in his chair, “right now we have Nick in isolation, quarantine. Only medical staff wearing full PPE, that’s masks, gowns, gloves, will be allowed into his room and strictly as little as necessary. I can’t stress enough how important it is we don’t introduce any more germs to Nick, his body simply can’t fight it. We will be giving him medicine to try to stimulate the growth of his white blood cells and other medicine to help him recover.” He squeezed Sarah’s arm, “his body has been through a lot these past few days. He needs time and rest.”
Charlie listened wide eyed, “so we can’t visit him?” He desperately needed to see him.
“I’m afraid not. There is a viewing window for his room and you are more than welcome to visit him from there. There is a speaker system so you can talk to him. He won’t be able to answer you but it is often a comfort for patients to know their loved ones are nearby.
“Can we see him now?” Sarah asked hopefully. “Of course, visiting hours are over but we are fairly relaxed in this ward so I’m sure they won’t mind just for a little while. Nick has been given a mild sedative to help him sleep so I don’t expect he’ll be awake. Follow me.”

They took the lift up to the ward and stopped outside Nick’s room. Charlie’s heart broke as he finally got to see Nick. He was asleep, wires and tubes seemed to be coming from everywhere. His face obscured by a mask. He put his hand to the window. Sarah hugged him gently. “I wish I could give him a hug,” Charlie sighed. “I know darling, me too. We just have to be patient and trust the doctors know what they are doing. They stood quietly watching Nick sleep.

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*End of Flasback*

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Charlie stood outside of Nick’s isolated room, alone. Sarah had gone home earlier that day to freshen up, but she would be back along with Diane. Charlie just couldn’t believe the events of the last few weeks. Nick had innocently caught Measles. Lot’s of people got measles, but Nick had been through one hell of an ordeal. It was breaking every part of him that he couldn’t sit with his boyfriend, talk to him, comfort him. All he could do was watch him through this little window, but as long as Nick felt his presence and knew he was there, then that was all that really mattered. David had visited a few days ago, completely shocked to see the state of his little brother. It was weird for Charlie to see David actually give a damn about Nick, but they were still brothers at the end of the day. Nick’s father Stephane on the other hand had failed to visit his son, not to Charlie’s surprise or to Sarah and Diane, either. What kind of dad chooses not to visit their kid when they know fine well the situation and how sick he is? It made no sense. Diane had went through him on the phone. Royally ripped him a new one. Rightly so, he had to hear it. Charlie sighed as he read the wording on the door again. This sucked. No one was giving them a clear idea of how long that Nick would have to be isolated for. He knew it was because nobody really knew the answer to that. It was all down to Nick. He just hoped it was sooner rather than later.

Nick blinked his eyes open. His head felt fuzzy, but he knew that was probably down to all the medications he was on. They had him on so many different drugs that he had lost count. Antibiotics, to keep his fever down. Immune globulin injections, containing antibodies to help rebuild and strengthen his immune system. They’d also given him Vitamin B-12 injection’s and Paracetamol and Ibuprofen to treat any pain and discomfort he may be in. If they were’t injecting him with medication’s, then they were drawing blood. He was beginning to feel like a human pin cushion. If it wasn’t for the chronic fatigue that he was feeling, he would probably be putting up a verbal protest, but he was just so tired all the time. The kind nurse had told him that it was completely normal, considering all that his body had been through. When he was awake long enough to comprehend what was going on, he was lonely. The doctors and nurses only came in to the room when they really needed to, like changing his catheter bag, checking his vitals or injecting him with drugs. Nick had also been fitted with a feeding tube as being so unwell had caused him to be severely undernourished. Much to his distaste, he was glad Charlie wasn’t allowed to visit him, for that sole reason. His boyfriend had been treated for an eating disorder in the past, he’d been close to being tube fed, this could be very triggering for him. Nick rolled over to his back, letting out a little groan as he did. His body was aching, probably down to being stuck in bed. He was still feeling the after effects from the seizure, too. He hoped he didn’t feel like this for too much longer. The brain fog, the sore muscles, feeling so lethargic and alone. He felt like a caged animal. Nobody was allowed in and he wasn’t allowed out. He hated it, he hated it so much.

“Nick??”

That was charlie’s voice. For some reason it always seemed to have such a calming effect on him. Just hearing his voice soothed him. It just frustrated him that he couldn’t reply. Well he could. There was nothing stopping him from speaking, but he would be speaking to an empty room. He could hear Charlie through the speaker but Charlie could not hear him. In a way, it made Nick feel even more upset that he couldn’t respond properly. “Your mum’s just nipped home, she will be back soon.” Charlie replied. Nick hoisted himself in to a sitting position, being careful of the tubes and monitors attached to his body, being super cautious as he didn’t want to set any worrying alarms off. He gave Charlie a small smile to show that he could hear him. Although all he wanted to do was cry and cuddle his boyfriend. Charlie wasn’t convinced though. He could sense Nick was putting on a false pretence. “Did you sleep okay?” He asked. Nick just nodded in reply. He could feel himself tearing up but he refused to appear any weaker than he already was. He would not cry. Not in front of Charlie so he blinked back his tears.

“Sorry darling, I’m going to have to ask you to step back from the window.” One of the nurses asked, dressed in head to toe with PPE. Charlie sighed. This was the time of day that he hated. He wasn’t allowed to be anywhere near the room when they did their routine check up on Nick, so he usually used this time to go home, freshen up, have something to eat, if he felt like it. He felt his phone buzz in his pocket and reached in to pull it out, noticing that he had a message from his mum.

I’m outside xx

Even his mother had become an accustomed to his routine over the past few days whilst Nick had been quarantined. He glanced at the Nurse. “Will you let him know that I will be back later?” He said, gazing through the window where Nick had appeared to have dozed off again. The nurse nodded. “I will, don’t worry.”

Charlie got in to his mum’s car and sunk in to the passenger seat with a heavy sigh. Jane glanced at her son in concern. “Everything okay, Charlie?” She asked as she began reversing out of the parking space. “No…” Charlie replied flatly. Jane frowned, glancing at him again. “Is Nick alright? He hasn’t taken a bad turn again has he?” Charlie shook his head quickly, feeling slightly guilty for worrying her. “No…No. Nothing like that.” He assured her. “It just sucks not being able to visit him properly.” “I know, love.” Jane sympathised with him. “It’s for the best though, you know that. Nick can’t risk getting sick again until his immune system picks up.” “I know…” Charlie sighed. “It’s just…he looks so upset and alone and it’s killing me that I can’t be there to comfort him. Nick was always there for me when I was…you know, ill. It just hurts that I can’t be there for him, too.” “That was different Charlie.” Jane reminded him. “I just…how long are they going to keep him in there for???” Jane sighed. “I don’t know, sweetheart.” She knew the doctors would do whatever they thought was the best for Nick. Charlie let out a loud sigh, he hated the not knowing part. He glanced out the window frowning as his mum had completely missed the turning to their street. “Mum? You’ve gone the wrong way…”. “We’re not going home, Charlie.” Charlie’s frowned deepened. If they weren’t headed home and they’d just left the hospital. Where the hell are they going? His brain rattled with all types of possible destinations. Until he saw the familiar sights of Whitesbridge avenue. Tao’s street, his best friend. “Tao’s?” He asked, confused. “Your friends are worried about you Charlie. They’re worried about Nick, too of course, but they’re concerned that you’ve shut them out. You need them.” Jane said firmly as she pulled up right outside house number 142. Charlie sighed, she was right. He did need them. He just didn’t know how he was supposed to deal with all this.

Half an hour after stepping into Tao’s bedroom he felt better than he had in days. His mum was right, he really did need this. He was cuddled up against Isaac, Tao and Elle were sitting on a beanbag. Tao’s mum had made bao buns and everyone was stuffed. “So, how are you Charlie,” asked Elle looking at him kindly. Charlie sighed, that was a question he didn’t know how to answer really. “I’m just stressed I think,”he admitted. “And tired. I’m so worried about Nick…” Isaac gave him a hug side hug, “have they given any updates yet?” Charlie shook his head, “I think they did more tests of his immune system this morning so hopefully we will know more later today.”
“He’s a big rugby lad,” Tao said, “he’ll be ok.” Charlie nodded, “yeah, I hope so.”
“Ok.” Elle clapped her hands, “let’s do something productive. “I’ve brought my art supplies, let’s make a card for Nick to cheer him up!” Charlie grinned, that sounded like a great idea.
Charlie was covered in glitter when his phone buzzed next to him. He grabbed it with one hand and his eyes widened. “Oh my god!” He whispered. Everyone stared at him. “What?” Tao asked, looking worried.
Charlie broke into a wide grin, “it’s from Nick! He’s got his phone back!” He opened his messages,
Nick: Char!! Good news! 🥳 the doctor said my white blood count is improving. I might be out of isolation as early as tomorrow! Mum was so happy she agreed I could have my phone for a little bit.i love you ❤️

Charlie felt tears spring to his eyes as he told his friends the good news. Things were looking up.
Charlie: omg babe that’s amazing! I’m so proud of you! Can I call you?
Nick read the message and called Charlie instantly.

“Nick,” Charlie breathed his name out. He was so happy. “Char,” Nicks voice was softer than usual, and a little weak but Charlie didn’t care. “I’m here with Tao Elle and Isaac, can I put you on loud speaker?”
Nick was glad that Charlie was with his friends but he felt a pang of jealousy that he was missing out on a catch up. He wondered what else he’d missed out on when he was cooped up in this room. “Nick?” Charlie broke his thoughts, “oh yeah course.”
“Nick!!” Elle squealed into the phone, “how are you??” “We’ve been so worried about you,” added Isaac. Nick smiled “I’m ok thanks, really tired and a bit fuzzy from all the medicine they have me on, but loads better than I was when I got here.”
“That’s good news,” Elle replied. “When do you think they will let you go home?”
“Soon hopefully. Once my white blood count is back to normal I can go home to recover apparently. Less likely to catch something at home than in hospital!”
“That’s brilliant,” Tao was relieved. He was worried about Nick, but also how Charlie had been coping. This was good news all round.
They chatted for a few minutes before Nick tired. “I’d better go, mum is glaring at me through the window.” He sighed, he couldn’t wait to get back his bedroom where he didn’t feel like a zoo exhibit. He said goodbye and chucked his phone down next to him. That small conversation had worn him out. He wondered how long it would take for his body to get back to normal.

In the end Nick stayed in quarantine for another 2 days before the doctor was finally happy that his white blood count was back in the normal range. His feeding tube had been removed the day before and he was able to eat small portions of food. He was only hooked up to an IV for medication now and he was feeling much more like himself again. Sarah had been hovering outside the door while he performed a few final checks, then he beckoned her through. Sarah wasted no time in racing to Nick and pulling him into a big hug. “Oh baby, I’m so glad you are ok. It’s been so hard not being able to come in and hug you.” Nick choked back the lump in his throat, “I know,” he whispered, “I missed it too.” Sarah grasped his hands and squeezed them tight. She looked at the doctor. “So he can come home?”
The doctor nodded. “He still needs plenty of rest and to avoid crowded spaces. No visits from anyone who is feeling under the weather just to be on the safe side for the next couple of weeks. No school for the rest of the month.” Nick grinned at that causing Sarah to nudge him playfully. “You can do home learning like during Covid,” she smiled at him, “no escaping your school work.” Nick was so happy to be going home he didn’t care.
“On a serious note,” the doctor continued, “your body has been through a lot Nick. You need to give it time to heal. Don’t push yourself, rest when you feel tired. I’d like you to book a follow up appointment with me in a weeks time to see how you are getting on.”
Nick nodded, “thank you.” He said quietly.
Sarah helped him to gather his belongings. A nurse returned with prescriptions for him to be collected from the pharmacy.
“Can I see Charlie?” He asked his mum. Charlie had been ecstatic to hear that Nick was coming home. “Of course darling, let’s get you home first though yeah?”
Nick nodded, as he stood up stretching his sore limbs. Getting back to rugby fitness felt like a long time away. Sarah grabbed his bag and they walked slowly out to the car.

Nellie was thrilled to see her boy back, she jumped up and smothered him in kisses. “Oh nel, I missed you.” Nick crouched down to pet her, feeling light headed as he stood back up again too quickly. Sarah obviously noticed. “Come on, straight to bed mister.” She ordered him upstairs. Nick was so happy to be back home, he changed into his pjs and snuggled under the covers. Sarah appeared with his medication and a cup of tea which he gratefully took. Hospital tea tasted abysmal. He was sipping his tea when he heard the doorbell and his mum answering the door. He just had time to place his mug on the bedside table when his door opened and Charlie launched himself into Nicks room and onto the bed, engulfing him in a tight hug. “God I’ve missed you.” He sighed. Nick hugged him back just as tightly. “I missed you too Char.”
It might take a while but right now Nick knew that everything was going to be ok. He was back home where he belonged, with his mum, Charlie and Nellie. That was all that mattered.

Chapter Text

Nick sighed heavily as he took a swig from his red bull can before slamming it down on his desk with more force than intended causing Nellie to let out a little whine from where she was curled up, sleeping on his bean bag chair. “Sorry Nel.” He apologised as he ran his hands down his face in frustration. 4 hours he had been set there, cramming. He had his Maths Exam tomorrow. He knew he had to do better than he did with his GSCE in the subject, last year. He knew his grades had to improve between this year and next. They would determine what university he got in to. He glanced down at his textbook. Why was none of it going in? His mind kept blanking. Probably due to the lack of sleep and over caffeinating. He finished the dribbles off in the can before tossing it into the bin along with the other 4 crushed up cans that he had consumed in the last 48 hours. Between studying and rugby he had no time to sleep. Exams were important. Rugby was important. Charlie was important. He’d been worried about his boyfriend recently. Normally Charlie would confide in him after his therapy sessions with Geoff, but Nick couldn’t help but notice that he had become sort of withdrawn and distant over the last couple of weeks. It was probably nothing to worry about but that did nothing to put Nick’s mind at ease. What if Charlie was getting bad again? What if he wasn’t eating? What if…What is he was hurting himself again? Nick couldn’t bear to think about it. He’d do anything to stop Charlie diving back in to that dark place again, even if that meant neglecting himself.

Nick was suddenly torn out of his train of thoughts by a ping coming from his phone, he glanced down at the screen and couldn’t help but smile when he saw his boyfriend’s name.

Charlie: Hey! How is revision going?❤️ ps we missed you at Tao’s tonight. Even though he forced us to watch Donnie Darko…again

Nick smiled. He’d felt bad about pulling out of Tao’s movie night, much to his friends annoyance as he had been planning it for weeks but Nick had explained to his friends that he needed to sit this one out if he had any hopes in passing any of his exams. So he instead spent the evening cramming in revision. What a fat load of good that was doing! He was definitely going to fail maths.

Nick: I wouldn’t have expected anything less from Tao if I’m honest😅 hope you didn’t miss me too much👀 as for the revision…I am definitely failing maths tomorrow…😩

Charlie: ofc I missed you, you dork😅 I missed using you as a pillow! Going that bad huh?

Nick: Nothing is going in 🤯 my head is empty…I’m definitely failing!

Charlie: I can come over and help you study❤️

Nick: it’s 11pm, Char😅

Charlie: So???

Nick: I don’t think our parents will approve

Charlie: I can sneak out 👀

Nick: No! Please don’t. Your mum hates me enough already 😅😅

Charlie: My mum does not hate you, Nicholas 😅

Nick: I think we can both easily agree that she is not my biggest fan😅

Charlie: …

Nick: my point exactly 🙈

Charlie: Please at least try and get some sleep tonight, Nick ❤️ you’ve got an exam tomorrow and then rugby in the afternoon. You need to rest xx

Nick: please don’t remind me, Char

Charlie: I think you’ve studied enough. Please go to bed.

Nick: I can’t. I still don’t get Quadratic equations 🙃

Charlie: go to sleep Nicholas ❤️❤️

Nick chuckled softly to himself as he placed his phone back down on his desk and then sighed in exasperation as he stared at the stack of revision notes, school books and past papers in front of him. None of it was helping. His revision cards were doing nothing. He was going to fail tomorrow. That was it. He couldn’t sleep tonight. He’d need to stay up and trying at least make something stick. He’d just have to sleep at the weekend. He turned around as he heard a soft knocking on his bedroom door. Charlie hadn’t snuck out had he??

“Nicky?” It was just mum.

“Come in.” Nick replied as he sat his pen down. He smiled softly as Sarah shuffled in to the room carrying a mug of what he assumed was tea. “I’m heading to bed sweetheart, thought you’d fancy a cuppa.” She smiled as she placed it on the desk. Nick smiled as he instantly picked it up and brought the mug to his lips. That was exactly what he needed. “Thanks, mum.” Sarah smiled as she placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. “How is the revision going?” She asked, chuckling as she watched her son screw his face up. “I’m going to fail.” “You will with an attitude like that.” She said as she ruffled his hair. Nick just sighed. “Nothing is going in, mum.” “You’ll know, there is such a thing as over revising.” Sarah informed him. “You’ve been up here for hours, baby. You need a good nights sleep.” She said as her eyes darted around the room. She tutted. He also needed to clean his bedroom, it was a pigsty, but that could wait for another day. “And Nicky, no more of those energy drinks, they aren’t good for you.” She lightly scolded him as she noticed the several crushed up cans in his waste basket. She could see her son was making no effort to move from his desk to start getting ready for bed. She sighed. Nick was definitely over working himself. “Please go to bed.” She told him as she kissed his forehead. “I will soon, I promise.” Nick responded watching as his mum strode over to the door. “Goodnight baby, I love you.” Nick smiled. “Love you too.” He waited until the door had clicked shut and turned back to his books. This was going to be a long night.

Nick did not sleep at all that night. Instead he consumed another can of red bull, he knew he’d get a lecture about that from his mum later and he’d also reverted to coffee. He hated coffee. It tasted like tar but he was willing to try anything that was going to get him through his exam and give him enough energy for his rugby practise, too.

Nick sat at his desk until 6:30 before stuffing his books and revision notes in to his school bag and going for a shower, hoping that would wake him up a little. He got washed, washed his hair and brushed his teeth before pulling on his uniform and making his way downstairs, just before 7am. Sarah was pottering around in the kitchen. She was always up so early. She was surprised to see Nick down this early as normally she would have to shout upstairs at least 3 times before having to go up and practically drag him out of bed. Little did she know. Nicky hadn’t even been to bed. “Morning, darling…” she sang in a chirpy voice as she pulled two mugs out of the cupboard and put the kettle on to boil. “Morning.” Nick responded as he collapsed into one of the chairs at the breakfast table just as an excited Nellie bounced up on his legs, happy to see her big brother. Nick chuckled and grinned and he scratched behind her ears. “Good morning to you, too.” Sarah smiled fondly at the pair as she placed Nick’s tea in front of him, finally taking a look at her son, she gasped. “Nicky!” She exclaimed, taking in the dark bags under his eyes. “Please tell me you didn’t stay up all night…” “No, of course not.” Nick lied. He hated lying, especially to his mum. Not only that, but he was so bad at it, she could almost always see right through him. “Nicholas Luke don’t lie to me…” Sarah replied in a slightly annoyed tone. Nick sighed. She was using his full name. This was never a good sign. “Sorry…” he sighed. Sarah sat down on the seat across from him, giving him her most disappointed face. “Did it help?” She asked. “What?” Nick asked confused. “Staying up all night cramming.” Nick sighed. “No, not really…” Sarah’s face softened a little as she placed her hand on top of his. “And now you’re just tired, yeah?” “Yeah.” Nick sighed heavily. “Not worth it, baby, sleep is important.” “So is not failing maths.” Nick retorted. “Nicky…” Sarah sighed, squeezing his hand. “Trust me, nothing fills me with more pride than you taking school this seriously, but you have to look after yourself properly.” Nick sighed. “Tonight, I want you to take a night off from the books. We will order a takeaway and watch a movie…how does that sound?” Nick thought about it. It did sound like a nice idea. One night away from studying wouldn’t hurt, would it? “Can Charlie come over?” He asked, with a little smile. Sarah couldn’t help, but smile herself. She knew there would be a catch. “You know Charlie’s always welcome, darling.” Nick grinned. Could he really risk a full night off studying though?

Nick arrived at school just before the bell went. He slunk into form and collapsed into his seat with a loud sigh. Charlie looked up from his homework, chuckling at the noises coming from his boyfriend, the laughter dying on his lips as he caught sight of his bloodshot eyes and the dark circles shadowing underneath them. He looked exhausted and Charlie told him as much.
Nick ran his hand through his hair, causing it to stick up in all directions. “Yeah, I had a late night studying,” he decided against telling Charlie that he had in fact been awake all night. He didn’t want to worry him.
Charlie rubbed his arm in sympathy, “how did the revision go?” He asked. He’d be glad when these mock exams were over, he hated how much it was taking out of Nick.
“I literally can’t remember a thing,” he pouted . “I’m definitely going to fail. Remind me why I took this horrible subject again?”
Charlie gave him a reassuring smile, “because you want to keep your options open for uni and some of the courses you like need a maths a level. You are clever babe, you have worked so hard. You’ll be ok.”
Nick thumped his head down on the table with a loud bang. “Ow” he complained. Charlie snorted. “Now you’ll have a headache as well as everything else! Come on, let me quiz you until the register.” Nick turned his head to the side, still planted firmly on the desk. “Ok,” he whispered, watching as Charlie rummaged through Nick’s bag for the revision cards he’d helped Nick write weeks ago. “Ok, quadratic equations….”

By the time it was the end of form Nick felt a little better. He’d remembered most of the questions Charlie had asked him. He just wished he wasn’t so tired. His eyes were watering and sore and he just wanted to close them for a little nap. But no such luck. He quickly downed a can of red bull on his way to his maths class to give himself a last minute burst of energy. With Charlie’s encouragement ringing in his ears he sat down at his seat as the teacher gave out the papers.

Charlie was waiting for Nick by the tennis courts at lunchtime. He was worried about Nick. He’d looked so tired this morning, he really hoped the exam had gone ok. He looked up as he saw him walking slowly towards him. His shoulders were slumped and he looked knackered but he did have a small smile on his face. Charlie rushed over. “How did it go?” Nick didn’t speak, just leant forward for a hug, nuzzling his face in Charlie’s shoulder. “Hug time,” he whispered.
Charlie wrapped Nick up in a hug, gently rubbing his back. Eventually he broke away, leading Nick to an empty picnic bench.
“So?” He asked, “put me out my misery!”
Nick sighed, “uh i think it went ok. I definitely messed up a few questions but I think I did enough to pass?” Charlie beamed at him. “Yes! I knew it!”
Nick smiled tiredly at him. He started eating his lunch when he remembered what his mum had said that morning. “Oh, mum is insisting I take a break tonight and have a pizza and movie night. You interested?”
Charlie grinned, “obviously! I’m glad you are taking a break. You look like shit babe.”
“Gee thanks,” Nick huffed jokingly. “I’ve got 2 more exams left after today. Biology on Friday and then psychology on Monday. Then I can get my beauty sleep!”
Nick felt a little more energised after lunch. He just about stayed awake in his biology class and was very relieved to get a message to say that rugby practise was cancelled due to a pitch clash with the football team. He put his maths books in his locker and made sure he had all the books he needed for his biology and psych revision. He was so looking forward to pizza and a film but he had a feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach at the idea of taking a night off. Could he really do that? Maybe he could do a little revision before the movie and then once Charlie went home. Not pull an all nighter or anything but just so he felt a bit prepared.
He made his way home and was greeted by Nellie and Henry as he closed the front door with a bang. “In the kitchen Nicky,” came his mums voice. He dumped his bag and shoes in the hall and went to find her. She was busy putting the kettle on, a small plate of biscuits already on the table. “How was your day darling, how did the exam go?” He walked up to her and gave her a hug before plonking down on the chair and helping himself to a biscuit. “It went ok I think?” He said, “I’m glad it’s over anyway.” Sarah smiled at him proudly. “All that hard work paid off then huh?” She said as she passed him a steaming mug of tea. “Yeah I guess so.” He sat quietly, eating biscuits and sipping his tea. “Nicky, you look shattered why don’t you have a little nap before Charlie gets here.” Nick shook his head, “can’t. I need to do some revision for psychology if I’m going to take the night off for a movie.”
Sarah frowned at him. “Nicky you are going to make yourself ill…..” she began her lecture but Nick cut her off with a kiss on the cheek as he picked up his tea. “It’s under control mum I promise.” He ignored her protestations as he scooped up his school bag and made his way up to his room. Once inside he changed out of his stuffy uniform and into comfy joggers and a hoody. He started laying out all his revision materials on his bed. He sat with his back against the headboard and picked up the first stack of revision cards.

🎵 Ding dong 🎵
Nick jumped awake with a start. He wiped the drool from his chin as he sprang upright. No. Shit. No! He’d fallen asleep! He checked the time, 5.15pm. His heart sank. He’d wasted two precious hours of revision time by falling asleep. He didn’t have time for that. He heard the sounds of his mum answering the door, chatting happily to Charlie. Nick moved his revision notes to the side and climbed out of bed. The nap hadn’t actually made him feel any more awake. He was still completely knackered and now he had the added worry that he had just wasted all that revision time.
He stretched his arms up to try and rid himself of some of the fatigue and then made his way downstairs to where his mum was still chewing Charlie’s ear off about something or other.
“Hey,” Charlie looked up to the stairs at the sound of Nicks voice. He grinned softly at him, holding his arms out for a hug. Nick fell into the hug with a sigh. “I’m glad you are here,” he whispered into his ear.
“Right boys, pizza will be ready in ten, start thinking about a movie you want to watch ok?”
They both nodded at her and Nick led Charlie into the lounge, pulling him down on the sofa next to him. “Cuddle first,” he smiled happily. “How did the revision go?” Nick tensed. He didn’t want to admit that he had fallen asleep. “Oh, it was ok.” He said slowly. “I still have a bit more to do but it’ll be nice to take a break.”
“You need to relax babe, come on. Let’s pick a film. What do you fancy?”
They scrolled through the apps, bickering good naturdely as they tried to find a film to watch.
Sarah appeared with two large plates full of pizza, “what have you decided on boys?” She placed the plates down on the coffee table and sat in the armchair. She smiled as she saw that they had chosen the new Bridget Jones film. “Did you pick that for me?” She asked smiling.
Charlie laughed, “that’s what Nick wants you to think! He’s been banging on about it for weeks!”
“Lies!” Scoffed Nick with a smile. He helped himself to a large slice of pizza and leaned back against the back of the sofa. He held out his arms for Charlie to snuggle into and they began the film.

Nick had enjoyed his chilled night with Charlie and his mum. They ate pizza, watched a few movies and indulged some Oreo ice cream that Sarah had purchased. It was exactly what Nick had needed, some time away from the books, but it was short lived. as soon as Charlie had left at curfew and Sarah had gone to bed, Nick retreated back to his room, armed with revision notes, a mug of coffee and can of red bull. He set his books down on his desk and got to work. He sat there until about 6am where he passed out on his chair. Waking up at 7:30am with a stiff neck and a banging sore head. What was that annoying ringing sound? His eyes widened. His alarm. He grabbed his phone from the side, shutting up the irritating alarm sound.

“Nicky! Time to get up…” Sarah’s cheery voice sounded up the stairs. Nick groaned as he rubbed his aching neck. He could kick himself. He wasn’t meant to fall asleep. He sighed as he glanced down to his unfinished mock exam paper, his sigh deepening when he realised he’d knocked the remainder of his coffee over it. Great, he’d need to start all over again. So much for the caffeine keeping him awake. He’d just need to study extra hard later when he got home from school. He only had two days until his next exam. Nick glanced at his clock, if he wanted to make it to school on time to use the library to get some revision in before form then he would have to skip showering. He could live with that for one morning. Nick quickly washed his hands and face, shoved his school uniform on and brushed his teeth before stomping down the stairs. “Morning, sweetheart.” Sarah said cheerily as she spun around, extending out the mug of tea she had made for him, her face fell at the sight of her teenage son. His hair tousled messily, his eyes bloodshot, with dark bags under them, an indication that he hadn’t gotten nearly enough sleep, his skin was pale. “Oh nick.” She said, genuinely shocked at his appearance. “Did you stay up all night again?” She asked firmly. She knew by the pause, that he had. “Nick?” She asked him again, crossing her arms over her chest. Nick looked at her sheepishly, knowing that he couldn’t lie to her. One because he was a rubbish liar and always ended up getting caught one way or another and two, he knew he looked like shit. “Yeah…” he mumbled softly as he sat his tea down on the counter. “Revising?” “Mhm-“ Nick replied, failing to look her in the eye, avoiding her disappointed look because he’d already had this lecture, yet he’d continued to do what she told him not to. “I thought we agreed you’d take the night off?” She replied. She wasn’t mad that Nick was taking an interest in his education, she was annoyed that he was failing to look after himself whilst he did it. “Are you mad??” Nick asked quietly, if there was one thing in this world that he hated more than anything, it was upsetting his mum. Sarah sighed as he face softened a little, she reached out and squeezed Nick’s hand. “No, baby..” she assured him. “I’m not angry, but I am worried about you..” she said as she ran her hand through his matted, unbrushed hair. “I know you’re worried about getting good grades, but this really isn’t the way, darling.” Most parents grounded their kids for not taking an interested and here she was on the verge of grounding her son for doing the complete opposite. It wasn’t worth it if he was going to make himself sick. Sarah studied her son’s face again before standing up. “Maybe you should take today off, sweetheart.” She suggested as she grabbed her empty cup from the wide and placed it in the sink. Nick looked at her as if she had two heads. How could she suggest something so barbaric. He had two exams left. He couldn’t afford to take any time off school. He hopped off of the breakfast stool. “There’s really no need-“ he said, just as his feet touched the floor, the room started spinning around him. His vision was clouded by black dots, everything was faded and blurry and he had to grab on to the counter top to steady himself. The movement send his mug spinning across the breakfast bar before crashing to the floor. Sarah gasped as she leapt in to action. “Woah..” she said softly as she guided Nick back in to the chair. Nick suddenly felt a hand on either side of his shoulders, gripping on to him as they guided him in to a chair. Sitting down didn’t feel any better than standing as the world continued to twirl around him, his head felt fuzzy and he felt a little nauseated. He rested his elbows on the table before laying his head in his hands, trying to make the world stop spinning. Sarah sprang in to action. She knew a dizzy spell when she saw one. She filled a glass of with water and sat in on the table before crouching down next to her son, placing her hand on his knee. Nellie occupying his other side, keeping a protective eye over her big brother. “I’m okay…” Nick mumbled, failing to lift his head out of his hands. “Just got a little dizzy..” “That’s it.” Sarah said matter of factly as she rose to her feet again. “I’m calling you out of school.” “Mum No..” Nick retorted as he lifted his head up, a little too quickly as the little dots appeared in his vision again. He groaned, resting his head on the table. “No arguments, mister.” Sarah said grabbing her phone and dialling the office number for Truham. It took 15 minutes for her to get through as the line only opened at quarter past 8. Then it was the usually rigmarole of stating Nick’s full name and form group. “Ah, hello yes…this is Nicholas Nelson’s mother.” She spoke as she got through. “Year 12, hamlet house.” Nick groaned softly as he lifted his head up again, glad to find that the dizziness has somewhat subsided. He couldn’t believe his mum was making him stay at home though. He wasn’t even sick. “He’s got a bit of a poorly belly and a temperature. Probably one of those 24 hour bugs…” Nick raised his eyebrow at his mother, watching her telling bare faced lies and making it look so natural. He waited until Sarah had ended the call and put her phone down before smirking. “A lie is still a lie, no matter how small it is..” he rhymed off, scripting the same words his mother used to always tell him, growing up, when she would teach him about honesty etc and here she was telling lies to get him out of school for the day. “This is different.” Sarah replied. “Just because you have a blatant disregard for your health and well being. I’m not going to sit back and watch you make yourself ill.” She scolded as she motioned to the glass of water. Nick rolled his eyes and took a large gulp before polishing off the glass. “Off to bed with you.” Sarah instructed as she took away the empty tumblr. Nick gave her a pointed look. “But I’m not ill.” He protested. “I know that but you’re flaming exhausted.” She replied. “You need to sleep.” Nick sighed. She was right. He couldn’t really the remember the last time he had slept the full night though without worrying about exams. “Go get in to bed. I’ll bring you up a cup of tea.” Sarah said. She was going to make sure Nick did nothing but rest today, if it was the last thing she did, even if it meant taking the day off work herself. She knew Nick would be less than pleased but if it meant keeping an eye on him and ensuring he was actually getting some sleep in then that’s just what she’d do. Sarah watched as her son trudged out of the kitchen and up the stairs before grabbing a dustpan and brush and cleaning up the shattered mug. She’d need to purchase Nick a new one. That had been one of his favourites.

Nick changed into his comfy clothes and snuggled under his duvet. He didn’t even have the energy to watch a movie, he just wanted to sleep. He stayed awake long enough to send a text to Charlie to let him know he was out of school for the day at Sarah’s orders, then chucked his phone on the bedside table and closed his eyes.
By the time Sarah opened his door with a fresh cup of tea Nick was laid on his back snoring softly. She smiled at the sight and tiptoed back out the door and down the stairs. She was so glad he was finally resting.

Nick slept until lunchtime and woke up feeling so much better. The dizziness had gone, he was just left with a nagging headache probably the result of those stupid caffeine drinks he’d been downing. He stretched as he got out of bed and plodded down to the kitchen in search of his mum. He found her working on her laptop at the dining table. “Oh baby you look much better,” she smiled as she looked up from her work. He grinned back, cheeks pinking, “yeah. I’m sorry about the mug, I really liked that one.” Sarah got up from the table to give him a hug, “don’t worry I know where to but a replacement! Amazon to the rescue. Now, are you hungry shall i do us some lunch?”
Nicks stomach chose that moment to rumble, making them both laugh. “I’ll take that as a yes! Cheese toastie sound good?” He nodded at her and sat down at the table. “I guess I should revise this afternoon…” he began before being cut off instantly by his mum. “Absolutely not! You are off school sick, so it’s the sofa and a movie with your mum. No arguments!” Nick could see it wasn’t worth protesting so he just decided to go along with it.
“Oh and baby? No more energy drinks! Promise me?” Nick nodded, “yeah they made me feel like shit to be honest.” He chuckled.
“Language Nicholas!” Sarah said jokingly.

Nick spent the afternoon on the sofa watching pirates of the Caribbean for the hundredth time with his mum. He dozed off a couple of times and Sarah let him sleep. He was already word perfect for this film so it really didn’t matter if he missed a bit.
Charlie came over after school to check on him. Nick let him in and was immediately enveloped in a bone crushing hug, “I missed you at school, are you feeling ok?” Charlie studied Nicks face for any sign of illness. Nick smiled sheepishly, “yeah I’m fine. I pulled another all nighter last night and that combined with the energy drinks made me feel a bit loopy this morning. Mum insisted I stay home and sleep.”
Charlie kissed him softly on the lips. “Always listen to your mother Nick, she knows best!” Nick agreed wholeheartedly.

Charlie stayed for dinner and another chilled evening on the sofa. Sarah joined them to watch the latest love island episodes before offering to drop Charlie home. “I’ll walk him mum it’s fine. The fresh air will do me good.”
Nick walked Charlie home, hands joined the whole way swinging between them.
“Babe? You promise you won’t revise tonight? I’ve been so worried about you. It’s important to rest and relax you know.”
Nick felt a pang of regret that he’d worried Charlie, that hadn’t been his intention at all. “Yeah I promise I’ll go straight to sleep. Revision can wait till tomorrow.” He had definitely learnt his lesson.

Chapter Text

Nick collapsed onto the grass, sweat pouring off him. The match had been brutal, the opposing team played hard and he had lost count of the number of times he’d been thrown to the ground. His legs were covered in cuts from rugby boots and dark bruises were beginning to form everywhere. He chugged his water bottle, tipping the remainder over his head and shaking his hair like a dog. “Fucking hell what a game,” Sai threw himself down next to him, panting. “I know mate, it was brutal. I need a lie down,” Nick joked with him. The result hadn’t gone their way either so everyone was a bit down. Nick heaved himself up to standing and held his hand out for Sai who took it and pulled himself up. “Come on, we both need a shower and I need to go and find Charlie.” Charlie had been watching from the sidelines with a very reluctant Tao, and Isaac who hadn’t looked up from his book once. Watching this match had made him extremely glad that he’d decided to give up rugby. “It looks like it’s over,” he announced as he watched Nick and Sai walk slowly towards the changing room. “I’m gonna go wait for Nick, I’ll see you guys later?” Tao nodded, “tell him bad luck from us. That team were definitely cheating.” Charlie chuckled, “I know right?”

He waited outside the changing room. He knew he could go in and wait but he didn’t want to have to listen to any teasing about him peeking at people in the shower. Most of the rugby lads were nice but there were a couple he wasn’t keen on. Nick stripped out of his uniform, grabbing his towel and headed for the shower. He preferred to wait till he got home to shower but he was absolutely filthy and there was no way his mum would let him in the car covered in mud. He stood under the lukewarm spray and let the mud slide off him, wincing at the stinging feeling on his legs. He glanced down, the cuts were only small, but they stung like hell. A scrape just above his knee was a little deeper, he must remember to put some antiseptic cream on it when he got home. 

Mud free, he dried off and put his uniform back on. He was so glad the day was done and it was the weekend. Charlie was coming over to hang out and his mum had promised they could order a dominos. Charlie’s curfew was half ten on a Friday so they had loads of time. He opened the changing room door and saw Charlie waiting, head down, scrolling on his phone. He looked up at the sound of the door and smiled, holding his arms out for a hug which Nick gratefully walked into. “I’m knackered,” Nick mumbled into Charlie’s chest, “I’m not surprised. That team were ROUGH!” Charlie pulled back to look at Nick. “You ok though yeah? Not hurt anywhere?” Nick smiled at him, “nah, just a few scrapes and bruises, the usual. I can’t wait to get home to chill though.”

They walked together hand in hand to the street outside Truham where Nick spotted Sarah parked up across the road. She waved to them as they crossed the road and climbed into the back of the car. “Hi darling, hi Charlie, how was your day? How was the match Nicky?” She started driving off towards their home. “My day was ok. We got thrashed in rugby though. I think I spent more time tackled to the ground than I did standing to be honest!” Sarah grimaced in sympathy. Charlie chuckled, “it wasn’t that bad Nick, you were by far the best one on your team as usual. You scored a try!” Nick smiled sheepishly, “yeah I guess. Still got beaten though!” “Oh well done baby for scoring. Still want domino’s tonight?”     “Yes!” Both boys chorused in reply and then laughed. Sarah grinned at them in the mirror. “Ok, let’s get in and settled, I’ll order at about 6pm ok? So Nick, no big snack when you get home!”

Nellie was there to greet them and both boys knelt down to give her strokes and let her give them kisses. Nick led Charlie up to his room and they both snuggled together on his bed. “Wanna watch a film before dinner?” Charlie asked, tracing patterns on Nick’s arms, trying to avoid the numerous bruises that were appearing. “Can we just nap?” Nick sighed contentedly, “I just need to recharge a bit.” Charlie pulled Nick closer and hugged him as he closed his eyes. Nap time was a great idea.

Nick had a busy weekend and before he knew it he was back at Truham on Monday. He was behind on his homework, having managed to successfully avoid it all weekend in favour of doing literally anything else. He made himself spend lunchtime in the library in a vain attempt to catch up a bit. He had rugby practise again after school. As he was changing he noticed that the scrape above his knee was still weeping a bit and looked slightly red. He made another mental note to put some cream on it when he got home and then made his way out onto the pitch. After another tiring practise he was glad to get home. He called Charlie after dinner and they chatted while they both tried to get some school work done.

The week carried on in the same way, it felt a little like Groundhog Day. School, rugby, homework, bed, Nick was exhausted. He felt tired and run down. He was definitely coming down with a cold which he really didn’t have time for. As he arrived at school on Friday, he shivered, zipping his coat up tightly to try to ward off the chills. His head was aching and he could feel himself shivering. Typical to be getting a cold at the weekend. He shuffled into form and plonked himself down next to Charlie who looked up at him with concern, “babe are you ok? You look a little sweaty.” He held out his hand to feel Nicks forehead before hissing at the heat coming from it, “oh shit, you are really hot babe,” Nick gave him a teasing grin, “I bet you say that to all the boys.” He joked. Charlie didn’t join in. “Seriously babe, you have a temperature, you shouldn’t be at school.”   Nick sighed, “I’ll be fine, I’m just a bit run down I think. I’ve got some tablets in my bag somewhere…..” he started rummaging through his bag eventually triumphantly pulling out a blister pack of ibuprofen, “aha, there we are!” He popped them in his mouth and swallowed them down with a drink from his water bottle. Charlie didn’t look convinced. “You should go home babe, you look rough.” Nick gave him a small smile, “ok, if I still feel rubbish later I’ll go to the nurses office, I promise.” Charlie was relieved and let the ,after drop.

Nick felt even worse by the end of the first period with Mr Lange, who stopped him on his way out of class. “Nicholas are you feeling ok?” Nick was visibly shivering now despite the fact his hair was wet with sweat. “Um, actually I don’t feel that good.” He admitted. The lights felt too bright, he felt stomach churn. “I feel a bit sick actually,” he managed to croak out before clamping a hand over his mouth and looking around frantically for somewhere to be sick. Mr Langes eyes widened as he realised what was happening and quickly grabbed the bin from by the door and thrust it at Nick just in time for him to vomit the contents of his breakfast into it. “Er, ok…..” mr Lange did not do very well with vomit and he looked towards the doorway for some support. “Ah, Sai, can you please take Nick and this bin to the nurses office? He needs to go home.”     Sai pulled a face as he was handed the bin but felt guilty for that when he took a good look at his friend who looked absolutely awful. “Mate, you look rough!” He picked up Nicks bag and held his arm with one hand, holding the bin as far away as possible with the other. Nick just groaned in response. God he felt rubbish.   Sai helped him to the nurse and was glad to hand over the bin to the nurse, who also looked less than thrilled to have to deal with it. “Right young man, let me give your mum a ring and get her to come and get you. You just sit here. Do you feel like you might be sick again?” Nick slumped into the chair. Truthfully he thought he might throw up again and the nurse was obviously less than convinced by the look on his face as she plonked a bucket down in front of him. “Feel better mate yeah?” Sai squeezed his shoulder awkwardly. “Thanks,” Nick whispered. “ can you tell Charlie I’ve gone home? I can’t face looking at my phone.”  “Yeah course, I’ll find him at break time. See you soon ok, go get some rest.”   Nick slid down the chair until he was almost laying down as he listened to the nurse call his mum. “She’ll be here in ten minutes, just hang tight.”

Sarah had taken one look at her son slumped in the chair in the nurses office before taking him straight home to bed. Nick didn’t protest at all as he quickly stripped out of his uniform, into light pyjamas that Sarah had left out for him. He crawled int o bed, snuggling under the covers and curling on to his side. He felt exhausted.  He felt the weight of something on his legs as Nellie hopped up on to the bed and curled up beside him.  He didn’t even have the energy to greet her like her normally would so he just lifted his hand out to let her lick, to let her know that he acknowledges that she’s there looking after him.   Nick blinked his eyes open as he heard a soft knocking on his bedroom door. His eyelids felt heavy and he was struggling to keep them open. He just wanted to sleep for a year straight.  Sarah walked in carrying a glass of water, some paracetamol and a thermometer in one hand and a bucket in the other.  “Oh baby..” She said softly, seeing her son curled up in bed, shivering.  “You don’t feel well at all, do you?” She cooed as she perched on the edge of the bed. She placed her  the back of her hand against Nick’s forehead. She hissed at the heat that she felt there.  “You’re burning up.” She commented as she placed the glass and medicine on the bedside cabinet.    She fumbled with the digital device in her hand, pressing it on and glancing at Nick.  “Open up.” She instructed gently. Nick let out a little groan, he felt too tired and drained go energy to argue or protest so he rolled on to his back and allowed Sarah to slip the thermometer under his tongue.  “Keep that there.’ She instructed, getting to her feet and leaving the room, only to return a few moments later with a cool, damp washcloth. She returned just in time to hear the beeping from the device. 

Sarah removed the thermometer from her son’s mouth with one hand, placing the cold compress on his forehead and pressing down with the other. She watched as Nick closed his eyes and sank in to her touch in relief.  “Does that feel nice, sweetheart?” She asked before glancing at the little digital reading on the thermometer. She gasped. Nick was running a fever of 39.7.  That was far too high. She tried hugging the thicker blanket away from him, but he just whimpered and clung on to it as he violently shivered.   How hadn’t she noticed Nick was this poorly this morning?  She knew he was coming down with something when he came down for breakfast this morning, sniffling and when he had declined her offer of toast and egg. His favourite.  He’d just settled for cornflakes instead, which he’d only eaten half of.  This fever had come out of nowhere though.  “Do you feel like you might be sick again Nicky?” She asked, kneeling down beside the bed.  Nick shook his head. He didn’t feel nauseas anymore. Just so, so tired and cold.  “Tired.” He mumbled.  “You can sleep soon baby, I promise.” Sarah soothed as she ran her fingers through his damp hair.  “I just need you to take some medicine, first.” She said, coaxing him to sit up a little. Which he did after Sarah propped the pillows up a little. She handed Nick the glass of water and popped 2 paracetamol capsules out of the blister packet in to her son’s hand. Nick took the with zero fuss which was also an indication that he wasnt feeling good at all as normal he’d put up more of a fight.    Nick collapsed back against the pillows. His eyelids growing heavier. He just wanted to sleep.   Sarah tucked him in with a lighter blanket as she didn’t want him overheating and his temperature spiking even higher than it was right now.   “You just sleep, love.” She soothed. “I’ll just be right downstairs.” 

Sarah sat at the kitchen table nursing a mug of tea with her mobile phone held firmly to her ear.  It was 11:30am on a Friday morning. She’d been sat on hold for the past twenty minutes trying to get through to the GP office. She was worried about Nick.  His temperature, he was so lethargic and drained of energy. She knew it was probably nothing to worry about, but there was that little niggle in the back of her mind that she should get a second opinion.   “Hello Truham medical centre, Lizzie speaking, how can I help..” Sarah was snapped out of her train of thoughts by the receptionist on the other end of the call.    “Hello, I’m calling on behalf of my son-“   “What’s your son’s full name and date of birth?” The receptionist cut Sarah off before she’d even finished speaking.  “Nicholas Luke Nelson, 4th September 2006..”  Sarah rhymed off.  “What seems to be the problem?”    “I’d like to make an appointment for Nick. He was sent home from school this morning. His temperatures extremely high and he’s very lethargic.”  Sarah explained.  She wasn’t being one of those overbearing, over protective mothers. Nick has been sick plenty of times in the past. She just couldn’t help feel like it was different this time.   “I’m sorry Mrs Nelson. We unfortunately have no appointments left this afternoon.”  “Please. I really think he needs to see a doctor.” Sarah replied. When did it become so difficult to get a doctors appointment?   “What are his symptoms?”     “Vomiting, fever, severe fatigue and he’s got a bad case of the shivers.”  Sarah listed off the evident symptoms. Nicky hasn’t really confided her in how awful he’s feeling, so there could be more that she isn’t yet aware of, but surely that was enough to warrant an appointment.  “Sounds to me like a bad viral infection. The doctor would only recommend that Nicholas drinks plenty fluids and rests in bed.”    “I would feel a bit better if he was seen by a GP..” Sarah replied, desperation thick in her voice. The receptionist wasn’t having any of it though, not that she was uncaring or unsympathetic. She was just doing her job.   “If his symptoms worsen, you could drop in to the urgent care centre on bridge street..” Sarah just tutted. “Okay, thank for nothing….” She said with a little bit more force than intended as she hung up the phone and let out an agitated sigh.  Nick needed to see a doctor. If his fever didn’t go down before evening. She would take him to the hospital herself.  

Charlie scanned the playing field for any sign of Nick as he met up with Issac and Tao at their usual meeting spot at the picnic benches. His boyfriend was nowhere to be seen though.   “Earth to Charlie??” Tao said as he chucked a bite sized carrot as his friend. “Wha-“ Charlie said snapping out of his trance.  “I asked if you wanted a carrot.” Tao laughed. “You were too preoccupied looking for loverboy.”  Charlie just rolled his eyes.  “Nick said he’d meet us here.” He shrugged. He couldn’t help but feel worried. Nick wasn’t looking good at all this morning. Had he gone home sick? Surely he would have let him know. “Hey Charlie??”  Charlie spun around to see Sai, Otis and Christian walking his way.  “Hey.” Charlie smiled.  “You guys haven’t seen Nick have you?” He asked curiously.   “Well actually…” Sai started.  “He’s gone home poorly hasn’t he?” Charlie asked.  Sai glanced at him.  “Wait? How did you know?”   “I tried to get him to go to the nurse this morning.” Charlie explained. “He turned up to forum looking like death.”   “Yeah he puked up his guts in Lange’s lesson.” Christian grimaced.  “He vomited?” Charlie asked, feeling guilty. If he’d known Nick was that sick he would have forced him to the infirmary.  “Yeah..” Sai nodded. “His mum picked him up about an hour or so ago.”   “Poor guy looked like shit.” Otis sighed.  “He’s an idiot for even coming in.” Charlie sighed.   “Give him our best if you see him later, yeah?” Otis said as he patted the smaller boy on the back. Charlie watched them leave as he pulled up his phone. 

Charlie: you are a moron 

Charlie: I told you that you shouldn’t have come to school 

Charlie: poor Lange will be cleaning puke out of his carpet for the foreseeable 

Charlie: seriously though, are you okay?? 

Charlie: can I come see you after school🥰

Charlie: okay, I’m assuming by the lack of replies that you are asleep. Please let me know you’re still alive though❤️ i love you 

Sarah spent the next few hours pottering around downstairs, catching up on household chores. She dusted and mopped the kitchen and living room, put a few washings on, checking on Nick every so often and made a start on a pot of soup just incase Nick had an appetite later. If he had been throwing up then he wouldn’t be wanting anything too heavy. Making the soup reminded her that she and Nicky had been supposed to be going to her mothers house for dinner that evening along with her sister and her kids so she had to send her mum and Diane a message apologising that they’d have to cancel as Nicky was under the weather. There was no way he was in any fit shape or form to be going anywhere. They had both promptly replied and agreed to reschedule to a day next week when Nick was feeling better.  Sarah let Nellie out in the garden before putting her dinner out. She then climbed the stairs to Nick’s bedroom.  The room was dark as she’d drawn the curtains earlier to he’d be able to sleep better.  She peered in to the room. He still appeared to be asleep. She turned to leave when he heard him call out. 

“Mum?”  She turned back around and walked over to the bed. “Sorry baby, did I wake you?”    “No.” Nick replied his voice soft.  Sarah flicked on the lamp on Nick’s bedside table so she could get a closer look at her son.  “How are you feeling?” She asked, tracing her knuckles along his burning skin. She hissed. His temperature hadn’t seemed to gone down much despite him taking paracetamol.  “Rubbish.” Nick replied.  “I can tell, sweetheart.”  She glanced at the glass of water that he had barely touched. “Can you try drinking something for me?”  Nick groaned. The very thought of anything entering his stomach made him feel like puking.   “Please? Just a couple of sips?” Sarah tried to reason with him.   “Ok.” He finally agreed although he really didn’t want to. Sarah helped him sit up a little so he was leaning against the cushions.  He took the water with trembling hands. He managed to drink a about a quarter of the glass before pushing it away and less than 60 seconds later he had his hands clamped over his mouth as Sarah scurried about to locate the bucket she had brought up earlier. She managed to place it in front of Nick in just enough time before he projectile vomited in to it. “Oh darling…” Sarah said as she rubbed comforting circles on his back.  Nick blinked back tears as he threw up, his throat burned with stomach acid and he hated being sick.  Nick proceeded to be sick another two times before collapsing against his pillows exhausted. He had nothing left to bring up. Nick muttered something. Sarah couldn’t really understand him through his delirious state.   She helped him changed his T-shirt as the other was soaked through with sweat. She tucked him in again and ran her fingers through his hair. Nick was completely and utterly exhausted as he drifted off to sleep.

Sarah had managed to peel herself away from her sleeping son without disturbing him as she went downstairs. She called NHS 24 for a bit of advice. They weren’t much more helpful than the receptionist she’d spoken to earlier. Fluids. Rest. Paracetamol. As if she wasn’t already doing all that.  Nicky was struggling to keep down water before vomiting it back up. He was lethargic and delirious.  Her maternal instincts were screaming at her.  Something wasn’t right. This didn’t seem like just a normal sickness bug. She’s never seen Nick this poorly before. Anyone could see how unwell he was. She was torn from her thoughts by her phone pinging as phone call came through. She glanced down as she seen Charlie’s name flash on the screen.  “Hello? Hi Charlie, darling…” she heard shuffling on the other side of the line and voices in the background. She glanced at the clock on the kitchen wall. School would have just finished. Charlie must be on the bus.   “Hi Sarah. Sorry for calling like this…I just wanted to make sure Nick is Ok? He’s not replying to my messages.”  Sarah felt her heart swell.  Charlie and Nick cared for each other so dearly.  “Nicky’s not very well, love.” She told him.  “I know…Sai told me.” Charlie replied.  “He didn’t look well in forum this morning…can i come see him?” He asked.   Sarah sighed. She knew Nick would want Charlie here, but she didn’t know if that was a wise idea. She didn’t really know what was wrong with Nick yet or if he was contagious yet and the last thing she needed was an angry Jane Spring breathing down her neck.  “I’ll tell him you called.” Sarah replied.  “I think he just needs to sleep whatever this off..” Charlie sighed. He knew that was probably for the best. He just hated being apart from Nick when he was like this. “I’ll let you know how he is later, ok?” Sarah negotiated with him. “Okay! Thanks, Sarah.”

The next time Sarah checked on Nick was just after 8pm. He was curled up in the fetal position, shivering and shaking. The thin throw blanket that Sarah had earlier tucked him in with earlier was now discarded on the floor, his face was pale, except from his cheeks that were flushed with fever. His eyes were open but he wasn’t really paying attention to anything around him. Nellie was snoring soundly beside him.   “Oh baby.” Sarah cooed as she sat beside him. She slapped her hand against his forehead and retreated away in shock. Nick was on fire.  “We need to get this fever down.” She said as she left the room, returning again with a cloth and a bowl of cold water.  She dabbed Nick’s face and down his neck. She pulled his t-shirt off and wiped down his chest and neck, any attempt to cool him down. Nick was completely out of it, mumbling a lot of nonsense, in a state of delirium. Nellie, who could sense someone was wrong, climbed on to Nick’s lap.  Nick let out a hiss of pain as she brushed against his left knee.  Sarah frowned.  “Nicky?”  “Hurts.” Nick whimpered.  Sarah carefully rolled up the leg of Nick’s pyjamas trousers to reveal a gash below his left knee which was red and raw and evidently infected. “Nick!” She said, horrified.  “How did you get this, darling?” She asked.  “Don’t know.” Nick replied, his head lolling side to side. He was weak and had no energy. He just wanted to curl up again.   Sarah began to piece parts of the puzzle together. Something was really really wrong here. She had to get Nick to the hospital.  "I don't feel good.." Nick whimpered as he curled back on to his side. 

"Nicky darling, I need you to try to sit up for me.” Sarah tried to squash the panic in her voice as she spoke. Nick didn’t respond, just burrowed himself further into his bed, his whole body shaking, his face pale and slick with sweat. “Nick!” Her voice was more insistent and Nick managed to open his eyes, “That’s it. Baby we are going to the doctor to get you checked out. I need your help getting you in the car, but you need to sit up for me.” Nick was barely aware of anything happening around him. He could hear his mums voice getting more insistent but it sounded like he was inside a bubble and her voice was muffled from the outside. He felt her tugging him up into a sitting position and he tried to help. He felt so very awful, his head was pounding like a hammer hitting him, his vision was blurry. Sarah managed to get him upright and into a fresh T-shirt and hoodie and helped him out of his room to the stairs. He sat down on the top step, his energy completely spent. “Can’t…” he mumbled out, leaning his head against the bannister. Sarah felt tears springing to her eyes, she didn’t know how to get him to the car. Should she phone an ambulance? She was distracted by a knock at the door. Leaving Nick to rest she went down to open it, surprised and relieved to see Charlie on the other side. “I’m sorry I know you said I shouldn’t visit,” he rushed out, “I just wanted to drop off some things for him for when he’s feeling better…..I won’t stay or anything…..” he stopped talking as he saw Sarah’s  tear stained cheeks. “What’s happened?”

Sarah let Charlie in and closed the door. “Charlie I’m so glad you are here, I’m trying to get Nick in the car to go to the hospital but I can’t get him down the stairs….hes so much bigger than me.” Charlie gasped, “hospital? Why does he need the hospital?”     “His temperature is out of control, he’s barely conscious and I found an infected cut on his leg which really worries me, I just need to make sure this is just a virus. I tried to get him a GP appointment but obviously they wouldn’t see him….” Her voice turned hard. A moan from upstairs caught their attention and she quickly ushered Charlie up to where she had left Nick. He was still on the top step, eyes closed leaning against the bannister exactly as she had left him.  Charlie couldn’t believe the sight of Nick. He looked a million times worse than this morning, how had he got so poorly so quickly it didn’t make sense? “Nick?” He crouched beside him and placed his hand on Nick’s cheek. Nick stirred and let out a moan. “Come on sweetheart let’s get you in the car,” Charlie’s voice was soft but firm.  Between Charlie and Sarah they pulled Nick upright and down the stairs. Nick leaned heavily against Charlie as they made their way to the car and it was a relief all round to get him in the backseat. Charlie buckled him in and then turned to Sarah who was watching him fondly. “Can I come with you?” Charlie asked hopefully, “I can help you get him into the waiting room?” Sarah hesitated, she didn’t know how serious this was and she didn’t want Charlie to worry, but he was right she could do with his help. “Only if it’s ok with your parents, I don’t want you to get into trouble.”

Charlie fired off a quick text to his mum, letting her know what was happening and promising to be home by curfew. Jane liked the message, which Charlie took as her approval. “It’s fine,” he said to Sarah before climbing into the back with Nick. He sat in the middle seat so he could hold his hand. Nick was leaning against the window. Still shivering violently. “Ch….char?” His voice wobbled as he spoke. “ Im  here,” Charlie squeezed his hand, “just sit tight it wont be long.”

Sarah drove to Truham general and pulled up in the drop off lay-by next to the entrance, knowing Nick wouldn’t be able to walk that far in the state he was in. Charlie helped Nick out of his seatbelt, again bearing his weight as he tried to manoeuvre him out of the car. Sarah spotted a wheelchair by double doors and grabbed it. If he’d been aware of what was happening she knew Nick would have protested being wheeled around but it was proof of how poorly he felt that he didn’t even acknowledge being helped into the chair. Sarah left Charlie and Nick while she parked up the car and then jogged back to the entrance. Charlie was knelt in front of Nick whispering resssurances to him. She could hear Nick moaning softly, the sound breaking her heart.  Sarah wheeled Nick up to the reception desk and accident and emergency and explained his symptoms. She made sure to emphasise the cut on his leg too. The receptionist looked sympathetically at Nick, “it might be a bit of a wait I’m afraid, we are extremely busy. Flu season, “ she sighed. Sarah bit her tongue, she didn’t want to anger the lady who was just doing her job but surely Nick was a priority.  Charlie helped Nick out of the wheelchair and helped him to lay down on a row of unoccupied chairs at the back of the waiting room. Nick immediately hunched in on himself, curling on his side in the fetal position. He felt so poorly. He wanted his bed, he wanted Nellie, and he wanted this all to go away. 

The minutes stretched by and Nicks name wasn’t called. Sarah had begun pacing, checking in with the receptionist every now and then to ensure he hadn’t been forgotten. Charlie was sat with Nick, nicks head resting in his lap. He was gently running his fingers through nicks sweat soaked hair, trying desperately to comfort him. He was really worried.  Nick was trying so hard to focus but the fever coarsing through him was relentless and seemed to be getting worse. Even with his eyes shut he could see shapes and colours swirling around him. People were speaking near him but he couldn’t make out their words. He tried to stay calm but he felt a strange sensation of panic flood his entire body. He needed to get out. He needed to move, he was too hot….too cold….his body felt like it didn’t belong to him anymore. Sarah’s eyes widened in panic as she saw Nick struggling to sit himself upright, his eyes suddenly open and looking around him wildly. It was like he wasn’t seeing them at all, he was completely delirious. “Nick, sweetheart sit back down,” she tried to comfort him. But Nick couldn’t hear her, he was trapped in his own mind which was playing the strangest of tricks on him. He forced himself upright, staggered a few steps forward before his eyes rolled into the back of his head, the world pitched sideways and everything went black. Nick crumpled to the ground with a loud bang. Charlie cried out in horror, Sarah immediately started yelling for help. 

The commotion drew the attention of all medical staff in the area. Within seconds a doctor was crouched at Nicks head, checking his pupils, jostling him trying to wake him up. Nick remained completely still and motionless. Sarah and Charlie held their breath, “come on baby,” Sarah cried, tears rolling down her face, “Wake up sweetheart.”  A hospital trolley appeared and Nick was lifted onto it. “Please help him,” Sarah cried. “I take it you are mum?” The doctor looked at her. “Follow me, I need to know his recent medical history.” The trolley was wheeled quickly away to a cubicle, Sarah jogging to keep up. Charlie stood still in the waiting room in complete shock at what he had just seen. Nick had collapsed? This was serious. He slumped back into his seat. What was he meant to do? He couldn’t leave, but he obviously couldn’t follow Sarah. He closed his eyes and pressed his hands against his eyelids, trying desperately to stop the tears from flowing. 

Nick was wheeled into an empty cubicle and transferred onto the bed. A nurse had appeared and was busy inserting an IV. They began removing his clothes, cutting away his t shirt and hoodie so they could  begin attaching sensors to his chest. An oxygen mask was placed over his mouth and nose. “Right,” the doctor looked at Sarah. “Can you give me a brief medical history?” Sarah was stood at the edge of the cubicle watching on in horror as they worked on her baby, who worryingly had not regained consciousness.  “Um, he was sent home from school this morning. He’d been sick and had a temperature. But he just kept getting worse, lethargic and vomiting. Headache. He couldn’t keep water down. His temperature was nearly 40….. I tried to get a doctors appointment but they wouldn’t see him….and then when I was helping him change out of his sweaty clothes I saw he has a nasty cut on his leg that looks infected.” The doctor who was listening carefully immediately rolled up the legs of  pyjama bottoms, exposing the angry looking wound.  “Ok, thank you Mrs Nelson. That’s all really helpful. Does your son have any allergies?”  Sarah shook her head. “Please help him,” she begged. A nurse put her arm around her, “your boy is in the best hands I promise. Come with me and let’s get you a cup of tea.” Sarah recoiled at that thought, “I can’t leave him, “ she shrieked, “what if he wake up and wonders where I am?” The nurse was sympathetic but firm. “ we need to run some tests, I promise we will take care of him. Let me show you to a relatives room while you wait.”

Sarah was completely beside herself as she was ushered in to a quiet room. A kind nurse sat her down on one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs and forced a cup of lukewarm hospital tea in to her hands.  “Drink that lovely, the sweetness of the sugar will help with the shock.”   Sarah gripped on to the cup. She didn’t want it. She wanted to be by her son’s side. How had this happened? How has Nick gotten so sick, so fast? It didn’t make sense.  She could feel the anger bubbling up inside her up. She knew something wasn’t right. She knew it this morning when she collected Nicky from the school infirmary. She knew it when she phoned the GP office and spoke to an NHS 24 worker. She knew it when she rushed her poorly son here. They could see how sick he was, yet they made him wait. Wait in a crowded waiting area until he collapsed.  Somethings not right. This couldn’t just be a sickness bug.   “I told them he needed to see a doctor.” She said to no one in particular, but the kind nurse gave her shoulder a soft, reassuring squeezed.  “He’s in the right place, pet..” she assured her.  “I tried to get him a GP appointment this afternoon .” Sarah sniffed. “They wouldn’t listen…”.  Why did she feel like this was her fault? She hadn’t pushed hard enough. She should have demanded that Nick be seen.  Maybe this could have been prevented.  Her brain was filled with an overwhelming amount of what ifs.  She felt helpless. Her child was somewhere down that corridor being poked and prodded. She should be with him.  She couldn’t bare to imagine him waking up and looking for her and being terrified and her not being there to calm and comfort her.  The nurse gave her hand one more reassuring squeeze before excusing herself. Sarah was left on her own. There was so many people that she needed to speak to. Her mother. Diane. David. Stéphane. What on earth was she supposed to say? She didn’t even know what was going on.   

Nick had been stripped and changed into a hospital gown now. The wound on his leg had been cleaned out with a sterile solution and patched with a sticky bandage. He had two IV drips one in his hand and one in his arm, feeding him fluids and antibiotics to try and bring his temperature under control. He had blood drawn and a lumbar puncture was performed as the initial assumption was Meningitis as most of the symptoms were linked.  He hadn’t regained consciousness yet.  It wasn’t until the doctor began to think that the wound on Nick’s leg could be contributing to his illness that he was sent for an MRI and CT and more bloods and urine samples were taken after a catheter was inserted. With Sarah’s consent as Nick as unable to verbally consent  to the procedure himself. Dr Morris, the lead consultant in Nick’s care had his suspicions, but he would need to wait until all of the results were concluded.  

Charlie felt numb as he sat, alone in the main reception area of the hospital. It had been 45 minutes before Nick had been whisked away to be assessed, Sarah right by his side. Charlie didn’t want to leave until he knew what was going on, but he also didn’t want to interfere and get in the way.  He couldn’t help but think something was seriously wrong. Nick looked so ill. The way his body shivered and shuddered as feverish chills ran through it, the glassy, confused look in his eyes.  He’d been completely out of it. He had clearly been in a lot of pain and discomfort with the way he whimpered. It broke Charlie’s heart to think about it. He wanted nothing more to rush through those double doors so he could be there to hold his boyfriend’s hand and tell him everything was going to be Okay.  Charlie snapped out of his train of thoughts by his phone pinging, he glanced down as his sisters name flashed up on the screen.  

Tori:  Mum said you’re at the hospital with Nick? What’s happened? Is he okay? Are you okay??!! 

Charlie sighed. He needed to talk to Tori. She always knew how to calm him down and when he was stressed and worried. His fingers hovered over the call button when another message came through.  

Tori: I see you creeping Charlie👀 call me now… 

Charlie felt the corners of his mouth tug into a small smile as he read her message. Trust his older sister to know how lightening the mood at a terrible time like this. He took a deep breath before hitting the call button. He had no idea how he was going to explain all this to her.  “Tori…” 

Rose and Diane Nelson rushed into the main reception of the hospital. Rose after receiving a hysterical call from her eldest daughter, had called Diane who’d left her husband in charge of bath and bedtime with their twins as she drove as fast as she legally could to pick up her mother and get to the hospital.  Rose headed straight to the reception desk as Diane scanned around the busy seating area at the Truham Generals A&E department for any sign of her sister and nephew.  She instantly spotted a familiar face. Charlie, sat on one of the chairs at the back of the room. His eyes red and puffy, tear stains on his face as he lifted his phone away from his ear as he ended a call.   “Charlie?” She rushed over.  Charlie got to his feet instantly, accepting the hug from his boyfriend’s Auntie.  “Oh love you’re shaking.” Diane commented as she rubbed his arms.  “Oh hello sweetie.” Rose exclaimed as she approached them, engulfing Charlie in a tight embrace, placing a slobbery peck on his cheek, her lipstick leaving a mark behind. Anyone who made her grandson as happy as Charlie appeared to make Nicky was a good egg in her opinion.  “What did they say?” Diane asked her mother, desperate to find out what was going on.   “Not much.” Rose scoffed, clearly unimpressed with the lack of communication.  “They took Nick down there.” Charlie explained, surprising himself with how hoarse his voice had become after he’d been crying so much.  He pointed down the corridor.  “Sarah went with him.” He explained.  “Uh…they made us wait here for over an hour.” He sighed. He couldn’t believe how long they had been made to wait.  “Sarah kept begging for someone to come look at Nick…he just kept getting sicker and sicker. Then he collapsed…” he said, shuddering as he relived the horrific ordeal. He wouldn’t be able to erase the sight of Nick crumbling to the floor right on front of his eyes out of his mind, ever.  “Do they know what’s wrong with him?” Rose asked. She was so worried about her grandson. Charlie just shook his head.  “It’s bad whatever it is.” He whispered.  “He’s got a cut on his leg. I…I don’t know where he got it, but they think it may be infected.”    “Oh god…” Diane gasped. Surely it couldn’t be a little cut that’s made him so poorly.   “He looked so sick…” Charlie mumbled, his wobbling and his tears threatened to fall one more time. Diane just responded by pulling him in for another bone crushing hug. 

Sarah felt like the minutes were turning in to hours as she stared at the white wall in front of her, her eyes fixed on the clock positioned in the centre of it.  Why was nobody telling her anything?  What was going on? Where was Nicky??  She felt like screaming in frustration. She glanced at the half drunk cup of tea, abandoned on the table next to her. It had probably gone stone cold by now. She couldn’t face drinking it right now. Her stomach was in knots currently that she afraid she might just bring it back up.  She just couldn’t make sense of all this. Nick had been absolutely fine yesterday, a little tired after school but she had just put that down to Rugby. He had seemed run down this morning, like he had the start of a cold. If she’d known he had been feeling as unwell as he had then there is no way she would have sent him to school.  Things had just gone downhill from there as it was only a couple of hours after that she had collected him from school. He was so poorly.  Sarah ran her hands down her face. She felt sick to her stomach with worry and anxiety. There is no way to describe how she felt until you’ve literally watched your child collapse in front of you.  Sarah glanced over  at the door as she heard it open as the doctor that had been treated Nick earlier stepped inside. She leapt to her feet instantly, desperately awaiting an update on her son.  Dr Morris strode in to the room, gesturing for her to take a seat again as she did the same, opposite her.  Sarah didn’t want to sit. She wanted to see Nick. She needed to see him, but she could hear the urgency in the doctor’s voice so she reluctantly sat down.  “Is he Ok?” She asked in anguish.  She needed to know.   The doctor removed his glasses as he rubbed at his tired eyes. It had been a long day, but cases like NIck’s that had this level of urgency were always hard going.    “Nicholas is critically ill..” he started off.  It was tough what he was about to tell her. Something that no mother wanted to hear. Sarah just glanced at him, her eyes screaming at him to just put her out of her misery.   “We’ve carried out various tests. Blood & urine samples, a lumbar puncture, MRI and CT scans and a wound culture to the laceration on your son’s leg..” he scripted off.  Sarah tried to follow along with the medical jargon. The thought of her baby going through all that without her near broke her heart. “We have ruled out meningitis.” He explained. Sarah let out a breath of relief.  That was good news, wasn’t it?  That had been a worry in the back of her mind, ever since she’d seen a meningitis awareness poster in the main waiting area.  Although she suddenly felt unnerved as the doctor shifted uncomfortably in his chair. What wasn’t he telling her?    “Nick has become gravely unwell as a result of an infection in his bloodstream, presumably caused by the laceration on his left leg…”  Sarah felt her stomach twisting. This didn’t sound good at all. 

“I’m sorry to tell you Mrs Nelson, Nicholas has Septicaemia, more commonly known as Sepsis…” 

Chapter Text

Sarah felt like her heart had dropped into her stomach. “Sepsis?” She gasped. “No, you must be mistaken….he…he can’t have….” she stood up and began pacing the room, her thoughts a jumble of panic. “I don’t understand….”
The doctor gave her a sympathetic smile, “please sit, I know this is a massive shock. I promise we are doing everything we can to make your son well again.”
Sarah sat down and pulled at her hair. This was a nightmare. “Will he be ok?” She whispered quietly.
The doctor spoke calmly and slowly as if talking to a frightened animal. “Nicholas will be taken up to intensive care,” he paused at the small sob that escaped Sarah’s mouth, “we have him on IV antibiotics to try to fight the infection. His blood pressure is very low so he is on fluids to try to bring that up. We are worried about his kidney functions so are monitoring him closely. His oxygen rate isn’t great either so we have him on oxygen. We are hoping to avoid ventilating but I must warn you that is a possibility.”
“Is he awake? Can I see him?” Sarah wiped at the tears on her cheeks. She needed to be with her boy.
“He’s heavily sedated to try to help him heal, but of course you can sit with him. It’s immediate family only on the unit.”
Sarah nodded. “So what happens now?”
“Now we give Nick time to get on top of the infection. But I must advise you that sepsis can progress extremely quickly. Nick is in critical condition, you need to prepare yourself that he may not recover. Is there someone we can call to be here with you?”
Sarah’s mind was reeling with those words ‘critical condition…..may not recover….” She couldn’t believe it had come to this. Her baby in intensive care. It wasn’t fair. All because of a small cut? And why hadn’t the doctors helped him sooner….
“Mrs Nelson?” The doctor repeated, “can we call someone to be with you?”
Sarah hand flew to her mouth, “oh my goodness Charlie! Nicks boyfriend….he came with us to A and E….i left him there. And I called my mum and sister. They might be here by now.” She felt so bad, Charlie must be worried sick.
“Don’t worry I’ll get the nurse to bring them here. It’ll take a little while to settle Nick in his new room so I’ll be along when he’s ready to see you ok? Try not to worry, he’s in good hands.”
Sarah shook the doctors hand and thanked him. It wasn’t his fault they were in this mess.

Charlie, Diane and Rose were sitting impatiently in the waiting room when they saw a nurse appear, “for Nicholas Nelson?”
“Here!” Diane jumped up quickly. The nurse made their way over to them.
“Sorry to keep you waiting, if you’ll follow me I’ll take you to where his mum is waiting.”
“How is he doing?” Rose asked. Charlie looked anxiously at him for news.
The nurse remained neutral as he spoke, “I’m sorry I can’t give out any patient information. I’m sure his mum will be glad to see you though.”
The lack of news that Nick was ok made Charlie’s chest tighten with anxiety. Surely if he was ok the nurse would have just said so? Did that mean it was bad news?
They followed him along the corridor where he stopped outside a closed door named ‘family room’ the occupied sign had been put on. “She’s just in here,”
The nurse knocked and opened the door.
Sarah looked up at the sight of her family coming through the door. In an instant she was surrounded by the warm embrace of her mum, Diane and Charlie close by. Sarah let out a sob of relief that she was no longer alone in this nightmare. She allowed herself a moment to let out her emotions before taking a breath and sitting back down. She gestured to the others to sit too.
Charlie couldn’t take the not knowing any longer. He took in Sarah’s red rimmed eyes and tear stained cheeks and the fear inside him doubled. “Sarah what’s going on? How’s Nick?”
Sarah tried to stay calm as she spoke. “Charlie darling I’m sorry I left you for so long…..” Charlie shook his head, “it’s fine Sarah honestly I’m glad you went with him.”
Sarah gave him a small smile and continued, “Nick has sepsis…..blood poisoning from an infected cut on his leg. The doctors have put him in intensive care…”her voice cracked as she spoke, “he’s really very poorly…..they said I….they said….” She dissolved back into tears and Diane hugged her fiercely.
“I’m sorry,” she sobbed, “they said…. I should prepare myself that he might not make it.” Rose gasped out loud.
Charlie sat in shock trying to make sense of what he was hearing. Sepsis, he knew that was really serious. But the idea that Nick might not make it? He couldnt get his head around that at all.
They all sat in somber silence as they processed the news.
Eventually Diane broke the silence. “Can we see him?”
Sarah sighed. “He’s sedated so he won’t be awake. They said immediate family only. So I need to find out who can come.” She looked at Charlie. “I’ll do my best to get them to let you come visit sweetheart. I know Nick will want you there.”
Charlie looked at her gratefully. He hadn’t even considered that he might not be allowed to visit. He fiddled with his fingernails as they waited for what felt like a lifetime. Diane offered to go and get a coffee for everyone while they waited but nobody wanted one.
After an anxious wait the door opened and the doctor came back in. “Mrs Nelson, we have Nick all settled in the icu if you’d like to come and see him?” Sarah nodded gratefully.
“We will wait right here,” said Rose. “Go see your boy.”
Sarah followed the doctor up into the lift and to the third floor. He let her through the security doors and into the intensive care unit. Nicks room was at the far end of the corridor. Before entering he stopped her. “He’s hooked up to a lot of machines which are all doing the job of keeping alive and monitoring him. Don’t be alarmed ok? There will be machines beeping and various noises. It’s all there for Nick. He’s heavily sedated but I encourage families to talk to their relatives. We don’t know how much he can hear right now.”
Sarah nodded and steeled herself as she entered the room. She let out a cry as she was finally reunited with her baby. She couldn’t believe how poorly he looked. He had been dressed in a green hospital gown. There were wires and tubes literally everywhere. His face was partially obscured by a large oxygen mask. There were IVs in both arms and she could see tubes coming out from under his gown. A catheter she guessed. He was completely still. Lifeless. And so very pale. His eyes had been taped closed. Tentatively she approached the bed and sat in the chair next to him. “Nicky? Baby I’m here.”
The doctor smiled, “that’s it, talk to him. You can hold his hand just mind the IVs. He’s on 15 minute obs so there will be people in and out. You can stay as long as you like.”
“Thank you,” she whispered, reaching out her hand to pick up Nicks. She held it in both hands and kissed his fingertips. “Oh Nicky, I’m here’. I love you so much my darling. It’s going to be ok.”

Sarah gripped on to her son’s hand. The machines and the tubes and wires. It was all so scary. Sepsis. She couldn’t believe it. She thought Nick just had a nasty stomach virus. The lady on the phone earlier had dismissed her, saying it was just a bug. Refusing to even book Nicky in for an appointment. She felt so angry.  If they’d taken her seriously Nick could have been treated earlier, but no. Her baby was laying in intensive care fighting for his life.  ‘Critical Condition’. The doctors words just kept playing in her head on a continuous repetitive loop. She knew what that meant, although she didn’t want to believe it. Nick could die. Her baby could die because he got sick and nobody took it seriously.  Yes, she couldn’t fault the staff that were treating Nick now. They were all wonderful and evidently had her sons best interests at heart but the GP surgery had let them down, NHS 24 had failed them and even the staff in the A&E department to a certain extent. Anyone could see how poorly Nick was, curled up on those hospital chairs, a blanket wrapped around his shoulders, fever pouring out of him as his body shivered uncontrollably due to the infection coursing through his blood stream, yet he was made wait…for over an hour.    Sarah continued to gently stroke Nick’s hand, mumbling soft words of comfort, in hope that he could hear her. She glanced at the nurse who was observing the monitors that her son was hooked up to.   “My mum and sister are outside. Can they visit?”    The nurse glanced at Sarah and smiled softly.  “Yes, of course. Although maybe it’s best to restrict it to two visitors at a time..” the nurse smiled kindly.  “They will also be required to wear PPE.”   Sarah nodded as she glanced down to the paper apron she was wearing as well as the gloves on her hand.  “Nick’s boyfriend is outside, too.” Sarah said, stroking Nick’s hand gently with her thumb.    “Unfortunately, it is immediate family only…”  “Please.” Sarah said softly.  She wasn’t one for begging, but she knew how much being able to see Nick would be a comfort to Charlie and she knew Nick would want him there. They were completely inseparable.  “Even just for a few minutes.  Nicky would want Charlie here.” Sarah sniffed. The reality of the situation had finally hit her.  The nurse gave her a sympathetic smile as she handed her over a tissue. She glanced down at Nick. He seemed like such a sweet boy. This was such a horrible thing that had happened. Sepsis was a horrible, deadly disease, as a mother herself. She couldn’t begin to imagine what Sarah was going through right now.  “A couple of minutes won’t hurt..”.  Sarah’s eyes twinkled as she smiled in the first time since this ordeal started. “Thank you.” She said tearfully at the nurse, before letting out a choked sob. She covered her mouth and tried to hold back the rest of her tears from falling. “Sorry..”
“I have a son the same age.” The nurse replied as she adjusted a blood pressure cuff on Nick’s arm.  “I would be exactly the same in your situation.” She sympathised as she took a note of Nick’s blood pressure, grimacing as it was still so much lower than it should be. She took his temperature, which was a lot higher than it should be.  She scribbled down some readings before flushing out his IV line, ready to administer another course of antibiotics.  “I just don’t understand.” Sarah sighed.  “He got so sick out of nowhere. He was fine yesterday..”. She just couldn’t understand it. If didn’t make sense at all.  “Sepsis is such a complex condition, it’s so fast progressing and most times the symptoms can be masked as flu…the main thing is you believed something more serious was wrong and you got your son here.” The nurse reassured her as she put a comforting hand on her shoulder “Now, how about I go get you a nice cup of tea?”

Charlie paced up and down the waiting room. They had been directed to one closer to the ICU, just down the corridor from Nick’s room.  He couldn’t get what Sarah had said out of his mind. Nick has Sepsis. Sepsis kills. Nick could die.  It wasn’t fair at all.  Nick had been fine a couple of days ago.  All this has happened because of a little cut on his leg.  It all started making sense.  Nick had gotten multiple scrapes and grazes from rugby last week. Dirt had obviously gotten in to one, poisoned his blood and now he was laying in Intensive care, hooked up to various machines. Fighting for his life.  Charlie glanced over to where Nick’s Nan and Auntie were sitting. Both with red, puffy eyes as they tried to process the reality of everything.  He felt his phone vibrating, reaching in to his pocket, he pulled it out. He had loads of messages from all different people.  His mum, Tori. The Paris Squad and even the rugby boys.

Mum:  Charlie? When are you planning on coming home. It’s way past curfew.

Tara: Is it true? Nick got sent home unwell?
Tao: Yes. Sarah had to pick him up this morning.  I do not want your germs, Nelson🙅🏻‍♂️
Elle: Tao!!  Are you okay Nick? ☹️
Issac:  Has anyone heard from him? Or Charlie?
Darcy:  Charlies probably over at Nick’s right now playing doctor 😉
Tara: Darcy!!
Elle: Poor Nick! Being poorly sucks anytime but especially at the weekend!
Sahar: Second that!!
Imogen:  I heard he vomited in Mr Lange’s class🥴Nicholas?? Is that true?

Charlie sighed as he read the messages from his friends.  They had no clue what was going on. What was he supposed to tell them? They would be devastated and so so worried.  Should he tell them? Without speaking to Sarah?  Maybe he should wait until he had more to tell. He sighed, deciding just to not reply to the chat right now.  It was going to be so difficult.  The reality of it all weighing on top of him. Nick may not recover from this. He glanced down noting that he had been added in to a chat with some of the rugby boys.

Sai: Has anyone heard from Nick?  He really didn’t look well this morning.
Otis: No. I messaged him later but the numpty has left me on read!
Christian: probably burying himself in embarrassment after puking in Lange’s class
Otis: I would too
Sai: Charlie?? Have you heard anything?
Christian:  Yo Charlie! How much whinging is Nick doing?
Otis:😅😅
Sai: Yeah Charlie we should have warned you that he’s a moaner when he’s not feeling well

Charlie sighed again. He knew Nick’s mates would be beside themselves if they knew what was going on. He just didn’t feel it was his place to say anything, not until he’d spoken to Sarah.  His phone pinged again and he glanced down.

Tori: ????
Tori: the silence is filling me with anxiety Charles….
Tori: Mum is going off on one as it’s past your curfew and you’re not replying to her messages.  You’re brave!!
Tori: Seriously. Charlie? Has something else happened? Do you know yet why Nick collapsed?
Tori: That’s it.  I’m coming there.

Charlie felt a calming sensation take over his body.  Tori was coming. He really needed his sister right now.  He didn’t know if he could do this without her. He didn’t know how to be strong for Nick. For Sarah. The not knowing was the worst part. It was suffocating him.  He was forced out of his thoughts by the sound of the waiting room door opening and a young nurse walking inside.  “Charlie? Would you like to come see Nick?” She asked softly.  Giving him a sympathetic smile, noting the tear stains and worry painted all over his face.   “I can see him??” Charlie asked, his eyes wide. He hadn’t expected it. When Sarah had told him that it was strictly family only permitted on the intensive care unit. He had just accepted it.     “Only for a few minutes..” the nurse nodded.   “It’s normally family only, but I’m sure Nick would be comforted by his boyfriend visiting…” she smiled. They seemed like such a sweet couple together.   “What are you waiting for, darling.”  Diane said as she stood up and gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze.  “Go sit with him and hold his hand…” she smiled.  Charlie felt a pang of guilt. It didn’t feel right that he was being allowed in to see Nick before his family, but at that precise moment, nothing else mattered. He needed to be with Nick.  He nodded before following the nurse out of the room, trying to mentally  brace himself for what ever state his boyfriend may be in.

The nurse stopped outside a door that lead on to the part of the ward that Nick was on, she motioned for Charlie to clean his hands with the sterile hand gel that was on the wall. She then handed him a sterile gown and gloves.  “I’m afraid all visitors are required to wear PPE before stepping on to this wing of the unit.”  Charlie didn’t care as he quickly put the gown on and slipped the gloves on to his hands. He would do anything if it meant being able to see Nick.   Charlie took a deep breath before pushing the door open and stepping into the room.

Nick was laid flat on his back. He looked deathly pale, there was a thin layer of sweat, beaded on his forehead. He had an oxygen mask over his nose and mouth, one IV in his left hand and another in the crook of his right arm. Tubes and monitors snaking their way around his entire body.  A thin white blanket was tucked around him. He looked so unwell. Charlie felt frozen at the door as a lump formed in his throat. He was expecting Nick to look bad but this was just another level.  Sarah stood up immediately as she saw Charlie, she stepped towards him, taking his hand in hers and guiding him towards the bed.  “Come on, love…” she spoke softly.  “Come say hello.”    Charlie occupied the chair at the opposite side of the bed from where Sarah had been sitting. His eyes completed fixed on Nick.  “Talk to him.” Sarah encouraged.  “He might be able to hear us…” she said as she sat back down in her chair, taking Nick’s hand in hers once again. She couldn’t bring herself to leave the room. She had to stay there in case anything changed.   Charlie hesitated for a few moments before reaching out and picking up Nick’s other hand. Holding it carefully and gently.   “I’m here, babe…” he spoke, surprising himself at how hoarse his voice sounded.  “I can’t stay long. I…I just need you to know that I’m here.” Charlie said, his tears threatening to fall again.  “I need you to know that-“ he paused for a brief second, glancing at Sarah and then back at Nick. “I love you…” he finished.  “I love you so so much…” he sniffed.  “I need you to fight this. Nick. I need you to get better…” he knew he sounded desperate. In a way he was. The thought of losing Nick was unbearable.   “You hear that Nicky??” Sarah said, tearily.  “You listen to Charlie. You’re so strong and you’re going to get better…” she kissed her son’s hand.  The only sound in the room for the next few minutes was the soft beeping of the machines.  Charlie stayed in the room for 10 minutes. The nurse didn’t say anything but Charlie didn’t want to get anybody in to trouble. She had been kind enough to let him visit for a short time.  He placed a soft kiss on Nick’s forehead before leaving the room. He had informed Sarah that he would stay around for a bit longer. He wasn’t quite ready to leave the hospital yet. He needed to be near in case god forbid something bad happened.   Charlie wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve before re-entering the waiting room, only to be immediately enveloped in a tight hug. Tori. She was here.  Thank goodness. Charlie withheld the emotions he had been holding back, allowing himself to let go as he crumbled. Breaking down sobbing in the arms of his older sister as she just held him tightly, whispering words of comfort in his ear.   “He’s got sepsis Tori…” Charlie cried.  “Nicks got sepsis.”

Rose and Diane took it in turns to visit Nick. Sarah refused to leave his side, even for a second. Nurses and doctors came in and out the room constantly, checking machines, taking observations, drawing blood, flushing the lines and administering antibiotics, all sorts of medicines and fluids.  Nick’s condition remained unchanged. He remained under a drug induced slumber.  Sarah, in a way was glad. She didn’t want her baby to be feeling any pain or discomfort.   Diane had tried calling Stephane again. Not surprised to be hit with his voicemail. Sarah had already left two messages. David was on his way, but he had a long drive from Glasgow.

“Your brother’s on his way.” Sarah spoke as she held on to her son’s hand. Rose sat at the other side. She held her grandsons other hand, occasionally placing a gentle kiss on it.  It broke her heart seeing him like this. It broke heart seeing Sarah like this. She was her baby after all.  “Why don’t you step outside, darling?” Rose suggested. “Go get a coffee and some fresh air. I won’t leave Nicky, I promise.” Sarah instantly shook her head.  “I’m not going anywhere.” She said firmly.  “Mum’s staying right here, baby.” She squeezed Nick’s hand. “I promise…”   Suddenly the machine next to the bed started sounding a loud alarm. Sarah’s eyes widened as she flew to her feet, her arms darting around. The nurse rushed over to check the monitors.  “What’s going on?” Sarah panicked. “Nicky?? Baby?” She cried, desperately as Rose came behind her, holding her tightly from behind as she watched on anxiously.  The nurse pressed a buzzer on the wall alerting more help and suddenly the room was once again flooded with doctors and nurses. Sarah and Rose were ushered out in to the hall.

A nurse led them back to the waiting room, despite Sarah’s protestations. . “I need to be with him,” she cried. Rose gripped her arm to stop her returning back to Nick. “Sarah, darling let the doctors and nurses look after him.” Sarah let out a sob and buried her head in her mums shoulder.
Charlie and Diane looked on in horror, “what’s happened??” Diane asked anxiously. Charlie felt the air leave the room as he gripped Toris hand tight. Why had they left Nick? What was happening?
Rose answered for Sarah, who was quietly crying on her mum, “an alarm went off on one of Nickys monitors and they told us to wait here. We don’t know anymore than that.”
They all sat, waiting, watching the door for news. Seconds turned to minutes and suddenly they’d been waiting an agonising hour for news. Nurses and doctors hurried down the corridor in both directions. Were any of them treating Nicky? “I can’t stand this any longer,” Sarah felt like screaming.
Charlie felt his phone vibrating constantly in his pocket. He knew it was his mum but he kept ignoring it while he waited for news. He didn’t care how cross she was. Tori looked at him knowingly, “it’ll be ok. I’ll handle mum.”
Finally the doctor who had been looking after Nick appeared in the doorway, a solemn look on his face. “Sorry to keep you all waiting,” he said indicating they all sit down. He sat opposite them, an iPad in his hand which he began tapping on, presumably bringing up Nicks notes.
“We’ve managed to stabilise Nicholas,” he said as everyone let out a sigh of relief. “However…..” Sarah looked up sharply. “What’s wrong?” She asked.
The doctor sighed, “the alarm was his blood pressure monitor. His blood pressure was dangerously low. We’ve managed to raise it slightly but while carrying out checks we discovered his kidneys have stopped functioning properly. I’m afraid this is a common side effect of sepsis so it’s something we’ve been preparing for.” He paused to allow everyone to absorb this information. They all looked on completely horrified. “We will need to start Nick on dialysis. we can administer it in the room he’s currently in. It’ll buy us some time.”
“What do you mean by that?” Sarah snapped quickly. “Im sorry…” she added. The doctor gave her a compassionate look, “I’m afraid Nick isn’t fighting the sepsis yet. It’s still got control of him. His kidneys failing mean the sepsis is progressing. His body won’t be able to continue like this for long. The next 24 hours will be critical. I promise we are doing everything we can. Would you like to come back through?”
Everyone sat in stunned silence. This was a complete nightmare. Charlie spoke first. “Um Sarah my mum wants me home, can I see Nick quickly before she comes and drags me home?” Sarah wiped the tears from her cheeks and held her hand out to Charlie. “Of course love, come with me.” She held on tightly to him as they walked along the corridor to Nicks room. Charlie could feel how shaky Sarah was as she walked. He didn’t know how she was coping. He knew he wasn’t coping. He wanted to wake up and find out this had all been a nightmare.
As they put on their ppe Charlie asked Sarah about letting their friends know. “I’ve had loads of texts from our friends asking how he is. They know he was sick at school, they all think he has a sick bug or something…..what shall I say to them?”
Sarah thought as she put on a paper face mask. “I think Nicky would want them to know. I’m ok with you telling them Charlie, you need their support too. Just please tell them not to come to the hospital.” Charlie nodded, “of course not. Thanks Sarah I’ll message them later.”
They both entered the room. It was a relief to see that Nick looked the same as before, but that relief was short lived as they took in just how pale and unwell he looked. The doctors words kept going round their heads. Charlie sat one side and Sarah began her vigil on the other. Both held his hands and whispered comforting words to him. Charlie wasn’t even slightly religious but in that moment he sent up a prayer to anyone who might be listening to help Nick.
All too soon Charlie’s time was up. Tori stood at the door, her face starkly pale and her eyes wide with worry as she took in the sight in front of her. “I’m sorry to interrupt but Charlie, mum is downstairs we really need to go.”
Charlie nodded. He’d pushed his luck and he knew they’d bent the rules to let him see Nick. “Ok,” he whispered. He leaned over to Nick and kissed his cheek through the mask. “Please fight Nick as hard as you can. We all need you to get better. “ he looked at Sarah “you’ll let me know if anything changes? Please? Good or bad I need to know.”
“Of course I will sweetheart, thank you for coming I know Nick would have wanted to see you.”
Charlie felt like he was being torn away from where he needed to be but he followed Tori down to the hospital car park where his mum was waiting in the drop off section.
“Charlie. How’s Nick doing?” Her face was full of compassion, which he found annoying. If she cared that much she’d have let him stay. “He’s in critical condition,” he spat out, “the doctor said the next 24hours are critical. His kidneys are failing….he….he might not…” Charlie choked out a sob as Tori hugged him tight in the back of the car. “He’s really sick mum,” she said. “Charlie that’s awful I’m sorry.” Jane replied. “I know you wanted to stay but it’s so late. I promise I’ll drive you back here first thing tomorrow ok? I am really sorry this is happening.”
Charlie nodded, trying to compose himself. He spent the car ride home trying to work out what to say to their friends. It was such a difficult thing to tell them, he knew they’d all be beside themselves.
Once they arrived home he ignored his mums attempts to give him a snack and took off up to his room, shutting the door and laying on his bed. He decided to just create a WhatsApp group so he could tell everyone what had happened in one go.

He set it up adding the Paris squad plus some of the rugby lads. He just named the group “Nick”
Charlie: hey guys thanks for all the messages checking how Nick is. I have some really horrible news to tell you. I can only cope with saying this once so I’ve added everyone to a group chat.
He sent the message and saw a few of their friends were still awake and online as they read it straight away.

Charlie: so Nick is in hospital. It’s really serious he has sepsis. Which is blood poisoning. He’s really poorly. He’s unconscious and on loads of machines and stuff to try and help him. But his kidneys are failing and the doctors said the next 24 hours are critical. I got to see him for a bit but I’m at home now. Sorry to dump this on you all but Nicks mum said I could tell you.

He pressed send and took a deep breath as his friend started reading and replying. He closed his eyes waiting for the notifications.

Sai: fuck. I don’t know what to say. He looked really ill today but I thought it was just a sick bug.
Tara: oh my god. I can’t believe this. I’m in total shock.
Isaac: poor Nick. Sepsis is really serious how did he get it? Do they know?
Tara: Darcy is with me, they are really upset. Can we visit him?
Otis: shit man I don’t know what to say. I can’t believe it.

Charlie rubbed his hands over his face before sending out a reply.
Charlie: he has a cut on his leg that got infected. They think it’s from that. It all happened so quickly I went to his house to check on him after school and Sarah was trying to get him to the hospital. He collapsed in the waiting room. His family is with him. No visitors are allowed other than family 🙁 I’m gonna try and sleep now guys. I’ll let you know if there’s any news.

Charlie turned his phone over so he couldn’t see the notifications popping up. He couldn’t turn the sound off incase Sarah phoned. He laid down with a sigh as Tori knocked softly on the door and came in. She didn’t say a word, just laid down next to him and held out her arms for a hug.

Back at the hospital Sarah was maintaining her vigil. She’d insisted her mum and Diane go home for the night, promising to call with any news. Her mum was amazing but at 75 she needed to look after herself. David was driving down from Glasgow and would arrive in the next couple of hours. So she wouldn’t be alone for long.

The nurses had been in and out checking on Nick. They’d begun treating him with dialysis and he now had two more needles in his arm. She watched the way the blood was pumping round rhythmically. She was exhausted but refused to sleep. She wasn’t going to rest while Nicky was so unwell.
A nurse came in to do the obs. She did the usual checks then lifted his blanket to check the wound on his leg. “Oh.” She said quietly. Sarah’s ears pricked up, “what’s the matter?”
The nurse replaced the blanket. “I just need to fetch the doctor, won’t be a tick.” Sarah’s heart started to beat faster. She tried to keep the stress from her voice as she spoke to Nick, “it’s ok sweetheart, you are doing so well. Just keep fighting ok?”
The nurse returned quickly with the doctor in tow. She lifted the blanket, Sarah leaned round to look and gasped as she saw that the toes on Nicks right leg were blackened. “What does that mean?” She shrieked.
The doctor immediately started giving instructions to the nurse who raced out the room. “Mrs Nelson your sons showing signs that his feet are not getting enough oxygen. See the blackening of his toes? If we let this progress it will spread and he will die. We have a small window of time to try to stop this but it could well end up being an amputation.”
“What?” Sarah’s hand flew to her mouth. “Of his toes?” The doctor shook his head grimly. “If we can’t get this under control it would be a below the knee amputation. To remove the infected tissue from the cut.”
Sarah felt the room spinning. “I don’t understand….what are you going to do?”
The doctor stood in the doorway, clearly preoccupied, “we need to get him into surgery and give the wound a thorough clean out. It’s our only hope. I need you to come with me to sign the paperwork….”
He left the room and Sarah just sat down in shock. Amputation? Nick could lose his leg? This day just kept getting more and more of a nightmare. She looked over to Nick who was still laying, unmoving. She hoped he wasn’t in any pain and that he was having lovely dreams. How could it have come to this?

Once again, Sarah was left alone in the small relatives room on the Intensive Care unit, completely oblivious to what was going on. All she knew was that Nick had been rushed in for emergency surgery. She had to give consent.  She had to sign to confirm that she was consenting to handing her son over to be operated on.  Possible Amputation.  It made her feel like her heart was going to stop. Nick could lose his leg or she could lose Nick. She blinked as the tears rolled down her cheeks. She couldn’t do anything now, except wait. Wait for news. However long that may be.  She had debated on calling David but she knew he would be driving and didn’t want to distract him from the road. Hopefully, he should be here soon anyway. Thank god for her sister though. She had picked up the phone on the first ring. Sensing the distress in her older sisters voice, had announced that she would be there as soon as she could. That had been about twenty minutes ago, just after Nicky was rushed in to theatre. Sarah glanced down at her screen.  Charle’s number.
She didn’t want to phone him in case he was sleeping. He needed his rest, but she had promised that she would keep him in the loop and she never went back on a promise. So she typed out a text message and hit send, just as the family room door flew open and Diane rushed in. Sarah got on to her feet immediately and fell in to her arms.

Diane held her sister as she cried, holding back her own tears. There was no way she was going to have been able to sleep when she went home so she had just settled down in the living room with the TV quietly playing in the background and her phone right beside her. When she had gotten Sarah’s panicked call a short while ago she knew she had to come back. David wasn’t here yet and Sarah couldn’t do this herself.  She didn’t really know much of what was going on but she knew it was serious. Sarah had just told her that Nick had been rushed in to surgery.

“Sarah?” Diane spoke, watching as her sister pulled away from the hug and composed herself, accepting the tissue that she handed to her. “What’s going on? Why does Nick need surgery. Is it his kidneys?” She asked, fear racing through her body. The very thought of her nephew laying on an operating table made her want to cry. This wasn’t fair. He had already been through so much in the last almost 24 hours.  He’d only been at the hospital for just over 8 and it had been a whirlwind of events. “No..” Sarah sniffed, shaking her head as she dabbed at her tears.  “It’s….um…his leg…” She croaked, trying to find the right words. She collapsed back in to her chair.  Diane perched on the one beside her.  ‘His toes on his foot have started turning black, Di…”. Sarah explaining, her voice wavering.  Diane let out a little gasp as her hand flew to her mouth. She wasn’t a doctor or medical professional but she knew what that meant. She knew what Sepsis could do.  “His foot isn’t getting enough blood flow and the sepsis is still spreading. It’s caused the start of gangrene..” Sarah cried. “The antibiotics aren’t working.”    Diane felt her stomach knotting. What did that mean?  “Is Nick going to lose his foot?”  She asked, hesitantly.  She didn’t know if she was prepared to Sarah’s response.  “They…uh…They’ve taken him in to theatre to do a deep clean of the wound, they want to throughly disinfect the wound to stop the infection.” She explained.  “If the antibiotics don’t start working soon. They might need to amputate.”

Diane had got herself and Sarah a cup of coffee from one of the hot drinks machines as the hospital cafe was closed considering it was 5am in the morning. The wait was torturous. Sarah just couldn’t stop thinking about what the doctor had told her.  Nick might not make it and if he does, he could lose his leg. Both possibilities were as terrifying as each other.  No mother should ever be put in this position.  If Nick had to have his leg amputated it would completely impact and change his life forever.  He’d no longer be able to play rugby which he loved.  It just wasn’t fair. How all this had happened because of a small cut. “Have you heard from Stéphane?” Diane asked, breaking the silence in the room. Sarah just shook her head. She’d left countless messages and voicemails for her ex husband. She hadn’t heard a thing. He should be here. If he was the type of father that he always claimed himself to be he would be here.  His son was critically ill.  Nothing in this world would keep her away from her poorly children. It just proved that she and Stéphane were on a completely different wavelength when it came to parenting.

David rushed in to the main reception area of the hospital.  It had taken him over 7 hours to get there. He had left Glasgow at just over 10pm when he had received Sarah’s call.  His mother had been hysterical. He didn’t really know what was going on, still.  He knew Nick was unwell and that Sarah had mentioned critical on the phone. That worried him. It didn’t sound good. What was wrong with his little  brother? He needed to find out.  He hurried over to the reception desk. “Can you tell me where Nick Nelson is?” He asked. He had no idea where about Nick was. He hadn’t heard from his mum, since her phone call. That worried him.  The middle aged woman behind the desk typed something in to her computer. “Can I ask your relationship to the patient?” She asked, chewing on a piece of gum.  “I’m Nick’s older brother, David.” He replied as he pulled his wallet out, showing her his ID. He didn’t appreciate much getting interrogated. He just wanted to know what the hell was going on.   “Your brother is on the Intensive Care Unit. I will fetch a nurse to direct you.”    David’s eyes widened. Intensive care.  Why was Nick in the ICU? Was it that serious?  He must be really sick.   David was shown to the ICU by a kind nurse and directed to the small family room.  He took a deep breath before pushing the door open.

Sarah’s head snapped up immediately in hearing the door open, hoping it was the doctor, but when she saw her eldest son, she leapt up pulling him in to a tight embrace. “Oh David…” she sobbed, holding him tightly. Thank god he was here.  David held her tightly for a few seconds before pulling back and studying her face. She looked absolutely exhausted. Her eyes tired and puffy, red rimmed and bloodshot.  He glanced to the corner of the room, noticing his Auntie Diane who also came over and gave him a hug.  “Mum??” David asked. “What’s going on? Where’s Nick?”  He asked. Why wasn’t she with him? He knew what she was like. She wouldn’t leave his side unless she had to.  Sarah didn’t know how she was going to tell him. Diane could sense her sister struggling. So she took over.  “Nick’s not very well.” She started, squeezing David’s hand. “He’s really very poorly…”.  “What’s wrong with him?”   “He’s got sepsis, darling…” Diane replied, watching as her nephews he’s widened as he tried to process what he was hearing. “What? Sepsis…” he was shocked.  “How??”   “The doctors think he got it from a cut on his leg. It got seriously infected and he became unwell…”   “He’s going to be okay, yeah?” David asked. He couldn’t really believe what he was hearing.  “The doctors are trying everything..” Sarah said softly, finding her voice. She took David’s hands in hers, giving them a squeeze. “They’re doing everything they can to try and make him better…”    David blinked. He knew what that meant. There was a chance Nick could die.  His little brother could die. It made him feel sick to his stomach. He glanced in between his mum and auntie.  “Why aren’t you guys with him?” He asked, anxiously.   “Nicky’s in surgery, sweetheart..” Sarah said.  David frowned. Why?  “What for??” He asked. This was all so much to handle.  “Nick isn’t responding to the antibiotics…they are worried about the lack of blood flow in his leg and tissue damage…” David’s eyes widened.  “Is Nick going to lose his leg?” he asked, horrified.   “I don’t know, darling…” Sarah whispered as she hugged him again.  “I don’t know.”

Nick was in surgery for almost 2 hours. The laceration on his leg was throughly cleaned out after the surgeon making an even bigger incision to ensure the site was sterile cleaned out good and proper, although they had to remove some damaged tissue. Replacing it with a skin graft, taken from an area on Nick’s thigh. They had also had to remove a bit of damaged tissue from the bottom oh his left foot. He would be left with a scar but it wouldn’t impact him too much. He’d also been given a transfusion of healthy blood along with more intravenous antibiotics.  He was returned to his room, hooked back up to the same monitors. His body was completely covered in tubes, wires and monitors. He had various IV drips, needles in his arms from the kidney dialysis and the blood infusion.  His skin was still deathly pale and his hair was damp with fevered sweat. The blanket was tucked around his waist again although his leg was left uncovered so that the colouring of his foot and leg could be easily monitored. There was a bandage on his foot, covering the ball part of his foot and two of his toes. The skin around his foot had returned to a healthy, pink colour, however there were some tinges of black still to his uncovered toes.  They just needed the antibiotics to start working now.

Charlie blinked his eyes open. He squinted as the sunlight beamed through his curtains. He grabbed his phone from the side. 6:30am. He was lucky if he had slept an hour. It was 3am by then time he had gotten home after spending over 6 hours at the hospital.  He couldn’t believe how the evenings events had gone. He had left his house after 7pm. He knew Sarah had told him to stay put and that she would let Nick know that he had rang, but something inside him had told him that he had to go see Nick. Thank god he did.  He’ll never forget the sight of Nick sat at the top of the stairs looking like death. Getting him to hospital had been a struggle but thank goodness that they had gone when they did. Things had just progressed so quickly from then. He couldn’t believe it. Nick had sepsis, that was why he was so poorly. He had blood poisoning. It made Charlie shudder every time that he thought about it.  He forced himself in to a sitting position as his eyes finally adjusted to the daylight. He glanced at his lock-screen. He had various messages from his friends. None of them being able to sleep until they knew what was going on. Charlie noticed he had message from Sarah, sent an hour ago.  His breath hitched as he clicked on it. His stomach twisting as he read it,

Sarah:  Hi Charlie love.  I hope you’ve managed to get some sleep. I thought I would just send you a message rather than calling as I didn’t want to disturb you at this early hour. However, something has happened with Nicky.  I don’t want to alarm you too much, I don’t really know myself what is happening yet. Just that Nick has been rushed in to theatre for an emergency operation on his leg. They are worried about tissue damage and the lack of blood flow to his foot so they’ve taken him down for surgery to give it a thorough clean. Hopefully we will know more afterwards. I promise I will keep you up to date and again thank you for all your help with Nicky last night you really are a good boy and my son is very lucky to have you.  Sleep well my lovely xx

Charlie felt tears spring to his eyes. Surgery?? Nick has been rushed in for surgery.  It just wasn’t fair. He wasn’t getting a break at all. First collapsing and then all the nasty procedures and tests that he underwent, his kidneys failing and now this? It just wasn’t fair. Charlie wasted no time in kicking his duvet off his legs and jumping out of bed. He had to get to the hospital. He knew he probably wouldn’t be allowed in to see Nick again as the nurse last night had probably broken so many rules in allowing it and the last thing he was wanting to do was get anyone in bother. He just needed to be there, though.  He quickly had a shower and brushed his teeth before tossing on some clothes. As he left the bathroom, he almost had a heart attack as Tori was stood In the landing. “Jesus Tori!!” Charlie exclaimed. He hadn’t expected her to be up. It was before 7am on a Saturday morning. He wasn’t expecting anyone to be up.    “Did you even sleep?” Tori asked bluntly, taking in her little brothers dishevelled appearance. He looked like shit, to put it frankly.    “I slept..” Charlie shrugged. “For a bit.” He added. He knew Tori and he knew how she could always see right through his lies.  “Are you going to the hospital?” She asked, making sure to keep her voice down so she didn’t wake up their parents. Saturday was always a lie in day in the spring household.  Charlie didn’t reply as he walked into his bedroom. Tori followed, taking his silence as a yes. “It isn’t even 7am Charlie-“    “Nick is in surgery!” Charlie cut her off, he let out a sigh as he sat on his bed. He watched Tori’s eyes widen in shock. “Sarah messaged me.  They had to take Nick in for emergency surgery. It…It’s his leg. He..He might lose it, Tor.” He sobbed as tears streamed down his face. Tori’s face paled. Paler than her usually pale complexion. She quickly sat beside her brother, putting a comforting arm around his shoulders.  “He’ll be fine.” She assured him, trying to assure himself at the same time.  “He’s Nick Nelson. He’s strong…’ She reminded him, but this was Sepsis they were dealing with and right now the Sepsis seemed to be winning.  “He can’t die Tori..’ Charlie sobbed.  “He’s not going to die.” Tori said firmly as she squeezed his hand.   “Go!” She said. “Go to the hospital. Be with Sarah…find out what’s going on.” She nudged his shoulder softly. “I will cover for you with mum..”    Charle gave her a tearful smile. He really did have the best big sister in the world. She always was there for him. Always knew to to cheer him up with her Older sister magic.  Charlie thanked her again as he picked up a pair of converse from his wardrobe and a hoodie. He paused for a second.  It was one of Nick’s. He had left it here last week. Charlie quickly pulled it over his head. It still smelled like Nick.  He wrapped it around himself as he pocketed his phone, laced up his shoes and ran down the stairs and out the door to make the bus that was due in a couple of minutes.  He read through some of the messages from their friends as he sat on the bus. He should really fill them in some more. They would all be so worried.

Tara: Is anyone else struggling to sleep?
Darcy: me!
Elle: Me! I havent slept a wink 😭 I just can’t stop thinking about Nick
Issac: me either ☹️ has anyone heard from Charlie? I messaged him separately but he hasn’t opened it.
Sahar: maybe he’s sleeping?
Tao: I doubt it.  Why did I think reading up on Sepsis was a good idea?
Elle: Don’t believe everything that you read Tao. We just need to wait for an update.
Sai: I haven’t slept either. My mum tried calling Nicks but she didn’t answer. I can’t stop thinking about how sick he looked yesterday🤒
Christian:  I take it nobody has heard anything?
Otis: He’s going to be fine guys.
Imogen: Otis is right. We need to stay positive for Nick

Charlie:  Hi guys. I just thought I would give you all a Nick update. I’ve had a message from Sarah. I wish I could give you a more positive update but unfortunately Nick has been rushed in for emergency surgery.  The doctor is worried about the lack up blood flow in Nick’s injured leg. I don’t know much more than that right now but I am on my way to the hospital so will hopefully have more to share soon.

Charlie put his phone in his pocket. It only took a few seconds before it started buzzing in his pocket with replies. Charlie didn’t have the energy to read any more messages right now. He just had to get to the hospital.  When he arrived. He picked up two coffee’s from the canteen and headed straight towards the ICU. He spoke to one of the nurses from yesterday who had pointed him towards the little family room again. He stepped inside, expecting to find Sarah, so was surprised to see Diane and David.  He had finally made it then. Where was Sarah?  Diane got up immediately and gave him a hug. David just glared at him, raising an eyebrow. “What are you doing here? It’s family only…”   “David!’ Diane scolded her nephew for his rudeness but Charlie just rolled his eyes, completely unfazed by the elder Nelson’s reaction to him being there.  “Nick is my boyfriend so I’m not going anywhere.” Charlie said simply as he sat down. Diane shot him an impressed smile at how well he handled himself with David. She knew he could be hard work.   Charlie handed her one of the coffees. He had got one for himself and Sarah but he didn’t feel much like drinking it and Sarah was no where to be seen.  “Where’s Sarah?’ He asked. The suspense was killing him. He needed to know how Nick was.  “She’s with Nick, darling.” Diane replied, taking a well needed sip of the hot coffee.  “He’s out of surgery?” Charlie asked. If Sarah was allowed to sit with him so surely that was a good sign, yeah?  Diane nodded.  “Only just. Sarah followed the doctor to go see him about 10 minutes ago.”   “How did it go?’  Charlie asked, desperately. He needed someone to put him out of his misery and fast.  “They’ve managed to save his leg…” Diane explained. “Yeah for now!” David scoffed from the corner. “David!”  Diane exclaimed. Her patience was already beginning to run thin with him.  “You heard that doctor.” David tutted “They don’t have a clue what they’re doing.”   Diane decided to ignore her nephew for now, turning her focus back to Charlie.  “They’ve cleaned out the wound and given Nicky a blood transfusion. They’ve started him on a new antibiotic, a stronger one.” She explained. “We just need to be patient and wait. It’s up to Nick now..” 

Chapter Text

Part 3

Sarah was completely and utterly exhausted. She was still wearing the same clothes she’d had on when she brought Nicky into A and E 24 hours ago. She had refused to leave the hospital in case anything happened to him. The nurses had been so kind, bringing her the odd meal and cup of tea. They had even offered her use of the staff showers but she just couldn’t bring herself to leave the room for longer than to use the bathroom. She was so tired it was hard to concentrate on anything. Nick had been on 15 minute obs so she was never alone with him for long.
He was doing well. The doctors were starting to say more cautiously optimistic things about his prospects. She gently stroked his arm as he slept. He was still covered in wires and tubes and the dialysis machine was still whirring away beside them.
She remembered the look on David’s face when he first visited. She loved her eldest very much but his relationship with his brother had been strained so it came as a bit of a surprise when he burst into tears at the sight of Nick looking so poorly. She’d sat him down and encouraged him to talk to Nick, but he’d found that too difficult. So he’d settled for sitting with him quietly and listening to Sarah’s soothing words. David had stayed for the morning before going home to look after the dogs and check on the house.
Charlie had sat with Nick too, and when he wasn’t sitting with him he was waiting in the family room outside. He couldn’t bring himself to leave either. It warmed her heart when she thought of how much love the two had for each other. She hoped Nicky could hear their pleas for him to get better.
He’d been admitted around 24 hours now. The doctors had said in the beginning that surviving the first 24 hours was his main goal. “You’ve done it baby,” she smiled at him as he lay sleeping. “I’m so proud of you sweetheart keep fighting ok?”
A knock at the door startled her. She looked up to see Diane, who was taking the seat Charlie had just left. “How’s he doing?” She asked, leaning forward to kiss Nick on the forehead before settling in the chair and immediately holding his hand.
Sarah stifled a yawn, “The doctor is due in shortly. The nurse who just did his obs said he was doing well…..whatever that means….”
Diane smiled. “He looks less feverish don’t you think?” Sarah nodded slightly. She didn’t want to get her hopes up but she’d noticed the sheen of sweat from his forehead had gone. The nurse had replaced the large oxygen mask with two prongs up his nose which seemed to be a good sign.
Soon after that the doctor arrived. He pulled up a chair and sat next to Sarah.
“Mrs Nelson, I have some news to share with you about your son.” Sarah held her breath. Please let it be good news.
The doctor smiled. “It’s looking really positive.” Sarah felt like she could breathe again. “Really?” She whispered, barely able to believe it.
“Yes. His fever is down, his blood pressure is coming back up. His oxygen levels have improved. He’s still extremely poorly and I am still worried about his kidney functions but I’m pleased to say I no longer consider his condition critical.”
Sarah let out a choked sob of relief, “he’s not going to die?” The doctor smiled and squeezed her arm, “he’s got a long road of recovery in front of him and I’m not saying he’ll be skipping out of here any time soon. But no. He’s not going to die.”
Diane raced over to Sarah’s side of the bed and enveloped her sister in a hug. Finally they had some good news.
“I’ll leave you to process the news,” the doctor said, “I’m going to try reducing Nicks sedation first thing in the morning. Bring him back round.” Sarah beamed at him. “Thank you so much.” She stroked nicks fringe, “I’m so proud of you baby. Everyone has been so worried.”
Diane watched on fondly, she was so relieved. “How about you go home and get some sleep tonight now he’s stable? Before he wakes up? Give you a chance to freshen up and be more human when they reduce the sedation.”
Sarah instantly bristled at the idea she’d leave him. “I can’t Di, I need to be here. You understand surely?” Diane sighed, she knew she’d have been the same if it had been one of the twins. “ok how about a compromise. Go home and have some food, take a shower then come back. I promise I’ll sit with him the whole time and phone you if anything happens.
Sarah hesitated. It did sound appealing to shower and change. And she could drop Charlie home, Jane would be keen to have him back. “Ok,” she finally agreed, “but I’ll be an hour tops.” Diane smiled. Sarah kissed Nick on the cheek, “I’ll be back my darling, auntie Di is here ok?”
It felt strange leaving Nick. Sarah made her way to the family room where Charlie was sat scrolling on his phone. His eyes widened when he saw Sarah appear at the door. Why was she here? He jumped up quickly. “What’s happened?”
Sarah gave him a smile and held her arms out for a hug. “It’s good news Charlie. The doctor said he’s not critical anymore.he still has a lot of getting better to do but the doctor thinks he’ll be ok.” Charlie felt his eyes watering and he let out a relieved sob. “Thank god,” he breathed out. “Is he awake“
Sarah shook her head. “They are keeping him sedated overnight. They will try waking him tomorrow morning. How about I run you home? I’m popping back to change and have a quick bite to eat with David. Di is going to sit with Nicky while I’m gone.”
Charlie couldn’t believe it. Finally some good news. He couldn’t wait to tell the others. He quickly text Tori to say he was on his way home.
Sarah dropped Charlie at his house and made a very quick stop home. She was only away from Nicks side for about 50 minutes but she spent the whole time worrying that something had gone wrong. Her heart rate didn’t return back to normal until she was back sitting by Nick’s side.
Diane chuckled as her sister arrived back, breathless. “That was speedy!” She joked.
“How’s he doing?” Sarah asked, mock glaring at her sister for the teasing. “He’s fine Sarah, his obs are all still good.” Sarah sighed with relief. “That’s good.” Diane nodded. “How was David?” She had seen how affected he’d been from seeing Nick in this state. “He’s ok. He cooked for me if you can believe it?” Diane gaped at her, “wow!” Sarah smiled. “It was really sweet actually. He had it ready when I got out the shower. I think he’s really trying to step up a bit.” Diane smiled at her, “that’s great.” She glanced at her watch, “I’d better go and help out with bath and bedtime. You gonna be ok?”
“I’ll be fine. Thanks for everything Di. I’ll let you know how it goes tomorrow morning ok?”

Charlie was in his room composing a text to send the group. He read through all the unread messages. His friends were so worried about Nick. It was heartwarming to know how much they all loved him.

Charlie: I have news! 😁 the doctor is really pleased with Nick. He says he’s no longer critical. They want to try to wake him up tomorrow!!!!!!!
He watched as messages flooded in. His friends were all obviously waiting by their phones for news.
Tao: thank god that’s great news
Darcy: 🥳🥳🥳🥳 go Nicholas!
Imogen: I’m so happy I could cry. We love you Nick.
Elle: you must be so relieved Charlie.

Charlie smiled as more messages came through.
Charlie: yeah it’s such a relief. Just want him awake now.

Jane called up the stairs that dinner was ready. He actually felt for the first time all day that he might be able to manage to eat something. He pocketed his phone and headed downstairs.

Sarah made herself comfortable next to Nick and settled down for the night. A kind nurse stopped by with a pillow and blanket for her which she accepted gratefully. She didn’t expect to get much sleep. Nick was still on regular half hour obs now after all. But she dozed in the chair beside him and it was morning before she knew it. She hurried to the vending machine and selected a black coffee. She added a load of sugar to make it drinkable and returned to Nicks side just as his doctor arrived. He was busy looking over Nicks chart. “Good morning Mrs Nelson. What do you say we start to bring your boy back round?”

Sarah felt sick with anxiety and anticipation as she sat next to her son’s hospital bed. The nurse had begun weaning him off of the drugs that had kept him sleeping for the last 36 hours. Nick was stable. Dr Morris had told her that himself. He was still very poorly and was going to need a lot of time and help to recover, but he was stable. “You’re doing so well my darling,” She said softly as she held his hand tightly. The antibiotics had started to kick in and the sepsis wasn’t progressing anymore which was a good sign. Nick’s foot was back to its normal colour and the nurses were keeping the surgery wounds clean and sterile. Nick was still receiving Dialysis as his kidneys still weren’t functioning correctly and he didn’t seem to be passing urine normally, which was a huge concern, so he was still on a bunch of medication’s to help with that, but he was certainly moving in the right direction. She couldn’t believe how close she had been to losing her son. Nicky had almost died. If it wasn’t for the nurses and doctors here at the hospital. Things could have been so different. It wasn’t worth thinking about. She squeezed his hand, her gaze fixated on it for the slightest of twitch. Nothing. She was scared to even blink. She didn’t want to miss Nick coming around. The doctor had warned her that he would probably be very groggy and confused and maybe a little frightened. He had been through a horrific ordeal. Sarah glanced at the cards that she had put on the table next to Nick’s bed. Well wishes from his friends. Charlie had brought them yesterday. She glanced at the little stuffed rabbit that was tucked in under her son’s arm. His childhood comfort toy. Her mother had found it a few months ago whilst cleaning out boxes in her attic. She’d brought it when she visited last night, along with her father, Rodger. Both relieved to find out that their grandson was doing well and that his condition hadn’t worsened. Oh how Nick had been attached to that bunny as a child. Bugsy had gone everywhere with Nicky. “When are you going to wake up poppet, eh?” She sighed as she brought his hand up to her lips, kissing it softly and being careful of the IV. It was just a waiting game now as the doctor had said. Sarah was desperate for her boy to open his eyes. It was a couple of hours later when Nick began to stir.

Nick felt like he was floating on a cloud. He could hear an irritating beeping sound coming from either side of him. His eyelids felt heavy. His throat and mouth felt dry. So very dry. He was laid flat on his back. He felt in between being awake and being asleep. It felt weird. His eyelids twitched. His head felt so fuzzy. Where was he? Why did he feel so funny? He was struggling to open his eyes. Everything just felt so far away. He could hear a familiar voice. He recognised it. It was soft and gentle. They were saying his name and telling him to open his eyes. It was his mum. She sounded like she was crying. What the hell was going on? He felt someone squeeze his hand. He tried to open his eyes. He blinked. White. That was all he good see. White walls. White ceiling. He was in a completely white room. “That’s it baby, open your eyes..” He was trying. Why was it so difficult? It felt like the impossible task right now. The room smelt clean and sterile. He was in bed. He could feel a stinging sensation on the back of his hand and in the crook of his arm. He was in hospital. Why? He tried to focus his eyes. He fluttered his eyes open, groaning as he was blinded by bright light. His mum’s face suddenly came in to view. She was crying, her face wet with tears and her eyes red and puffy. She looked like she hadn’t slept in weeks. “Hey baby.” Sarah choked out as she saw his eyes open. Nick just blinked. Trying to adjust to his surroundings. He was so confused. He was so tired. He could feel the exhaustion trying to pull him back in to slumber. He tried his hardest to fight it. He was suddenly aware of someone else at the opposite side of the bed. Dressed in pale blue. A nurse. Perhaps?? Yes. She was a nurse as she fiddled with the tube attached to his hand. He winced. It stung a little. What was it for? Why was he here? He didn’t understand. ‘It’s nice to see you awake, handsome…” the nurse smiled as she twisted his arm in to a blood pressure cuff. How long had he been asleep? Nick had so many questions floating around his head. His head ached. His leg felt weird. He felt so so tired. He was scared. He didn’t know what was happening. His mum was there though. That provided him with some comfort. Suddenly he felt himself moving slightly forward as the nurse sat the bed up ever so slightly. “Are you thirsty, pet?” She asked, barely waiting for his response before putting a straw against his lips. Nick was grateful, his mouth was do dry and his throat felt like sandpaper. The cool liquid felt amazing as it slid down his throat. He took a few sips before rolling his head to the side to indicate that he was finished.

Sarah combed her fingers through her sons hair. The relief that she felt seeing his eyes open was amazing. Nicky hadn’t said a word, but that was okay. He was awake. He had opened his eyes. She glanced at his face, his chocolate brown eyes swimming with confusion. She couldn’t believe how close she had been to losing her sweet, kind, wonderful baby boy. “You’re in hospital sweetheart.” She soothed, squeezing his hand in a comforting manner. “You have been very sick, Nicky..” She explained. Watching his eyes, which just held a blank expression. “It’s normal for him to be confused and disorientated.” The nurse reassured her as she placed the cup of water back on the side. “His body has been through so much..” Nick couldn’t keep his eyes open any longer as he fell back to sleep. His body was exhausted. Being awake for only a few moments had completely drained him. “Nicky?” Sarah asked, panicked. Was this normal? He’d only just woken up. “He’s exhausted..” The nurse told him. “He will probably be groggy and sleepy for some time…we have reduced the sedation, but the drugs are still in his system. I can assure you that went very well.” She smiled as she squeezed Sarahs shoulder, encouragingly. Sarah allowed herself to relax a little. This was a good sign. They were heading in the right direction. The nurse finished doing some other checks before taking a look at Nick’s catheter bag. It was still only half full. He was passing urine, just not as regularly as he should be but it was a sign that is kidneys were still functioning. They had to just keep a close eye on it and ensure it wasn’t causing Nick any pain or discomfort. “Would you like a cup of tea?” Sarah smiled, warmly. That sounded really nice actually. She might be able to drink one and actually enjoy it for the first time since this ordeal started. “Yes, please…”

Charlie laid on his bed. It was Sunday afternoon which only meant one thing. School tomorrow. The thought of going to school without Nick made him feel sick. He knew how quickly news spread around Truham and Higgs so he was expecting that everyone and their dog knew about Nick at this point and it would be the talk of the school. He knew people just cared and they were worried, but Charlie wasn’t in the mood to talk.He just wanted to be with Nick. Jane and Julio had requested they wait until he had heard an update from Sarah so had stopped him going to the hospital this afternoon, despite his pleas of protest. Charlie nearly head butted the wall with how quickly he leapt up in hearing his phone ping with a message. He glanced down, his heart stuck in his throat as he saw Sarah’s name on his notification screen. He clicked into the message. Please be good news, please be good news.

Sarah: Hi Charlie love. I thought I would just update you on how Nicky is doing today.
He woke up for a few minutes just now. He’s very tired and he didn’t say anything but the doctor was very pleased with how it went. He says he’ll probably be sleeping on and off for the next day or so.

Charlie felt a shiver of relief rush through him. Nick had woken up! He couldn’t believe it.

Charlie: I’m so happy he woke up. Do you think I can visit him later today?

He held his breath as he waited, watching the dots appearing on the screen. His heart sank as he read her reply.

Sarah: probably best wait will tomorrow if that’s ok Charlie love? I’m expecting Nicky’s dad this evening. I think he’ll probably be asleep the whole time anyway. Come after school tomorrow?

Charlie was disappointed but he understood. Nicks dad was a complete waste of space but he deserved to spend some time with Nick.

Charlie: yeah course, send him my love and tell him I’ll be there as soon as school is over

He watched Sarah heart the message, then chucked his phone on the bed. He laid down with a sigh. It was amazing news that Nick had woken up, even briefly, but he was gutted he had to wait till tomorrow to see him.

Back at the hospital Sarah couldn’t keep her eyes off Nick. He was deeply asleep again, his chest rising and falling rhythmically. She had felt bad telling Charlie to hold off on visiting. She glanced at her watch. Stephane was due any minute. She’d finally managed to get in touch with him and to his credit he’d caught the first flight over from Paris. His plane had landed early this afternoon and he was currently on his way in an Uber. She sighed. Dealing with her ex husband was exhausting. He had a way of always saying or doing the wrong thing.

Nick moaned a little in his sleep and her heart skipped a beat. She gently stroked his hair and tried to soothe him, “shhhh, it’s ok sweetheart, just rest.” Nicks eyes fluttered open, unfocused, then closed again and he drifted back off.
Sarah kept her hand in his hair, gently stroking him to keep him calm and resting. He needed all the rest he could get after everything he had been through.
A gentle tap at the door caught her attention and she looked up to see Stephane in the doorway. He had a mini wheely suitcase with him and his coat draped over his arm. She watched as he processed the sight in front of him. The monitors, the wires and tubes. and Nick still looking extremely pale and poorly asleep in the centre of the room.
“Sarah! How is my boy doing?” He asked, putting his case in the corner of the room and then greeting her with two kisses, one to each cheek.
“He woke up a little while ago,” Sarah said with a small smile. “ he didn’t say anything but it’s a good sign. The doctors are pleased with his progress,”
Stephane stood awkwardly at the side of the bed looking down at his youngest son. “You can hold his hand,” Sarah said, gesturing for him to sit down. Stephane sat in the plastic chair and patted Nicks arm. “Nicholas,” he said, his voice loud in the quiet of the room, “it’s your dad here. Come to see how you are doing,” he stared at Nicks face for a sign that he was listening, then sighed as he realised Nick was fast asleep. “Will he wake soon? I would like to speak to him while I’m here.” Sarah narrowed her eyes at him, “he needs his sleep Stephane, he’s been so ill. What’s the rush anyway? Surely you don’t have anywhere better to be?”
Stephane looked sheepish. “no of course not Sarah, I do have a meeting in London tomorrow. But I can stay this evening.”
Sarah seethed inwardly. Of course he decided to combine a trip to see his seriously ill son with a business trip. She swallowed her anger for the sake of Nick though. He needed rest, not to hear his mum arguing with his dad. “Right,” she muttered, “of course.”
Stephane ignored her comment, his hand patting Nick’s in a way that he probably thought was comforting.

Nick could hear voices above him. He was still so sleepy. The kind of exhaustion where you simply don’t have the energy to open your eyes. His eyelids felt like lead. But added to the voices was an annoying tapping sensation on his arm. He flinched to try to stop it, a voice then becoming clearer, “ah! Nicholas you are waking up yes?” Nicks mind desperately tried to figure out what was going on. That sounded like his dad? But what on earth was his dad doing here? He forced his eyes open, blinking at the brightness which made his head pound. He rolled his head to the side and, yes, there was his dad large as life with a huge smile on his face.
On the other side of the bed, out of his vision Sarah was seething that Stephane had woken Nick up. Typical of him to get what he wanted. Sure he’d say he hadn’t meant to wake him up but Sarah knew better. She swallowed her anger as she gently spoke, “hey baby, your dad is here to see you,”
Nick looked at his mum. This was all so confusing. He still wasn’t sure why he was in a hospital and he didn’t have the ability to form any words to even begin to ask. His dad was in France? Why was he here?
Stephane looked at his son, “Nicholas” he repeated, “it is good to see you, how are you feeling?”
Nicks mind desperately tried to come up with an answer but he didn’t know how he felt. His leg hurt, his head hurt, his stomach felt weird. His back ached too. The IVs in his arms were pinching and the nose prongs giving him oxygen were uncomfortable. He looked at his dad blankly and managed to shrug his shoulders. He just wanted to go back to sleep.
“Just rest baby,” there was his mums soothing voice. “Sleep. We will be here when you wake up.” Nick nodded and closed his eyes back to the blissful blackness and sleep.
“Why did you tell him that?” Stephane was annoyed. “I wanted to talk to him while I was here.” Sarah glared at him before gesturing to the door. “Let’s talk outside.” She hissed.
She got up without waiting for a response and Stephane followed her into the hallway. she kept an eye on Nick through the doorway before turning to her ex husband. “Nick needs to rest, you woke him up on purpose. Just because you want to get back to London for your meeting doesn’t mean you can force him to be ready to talk for you.” Stephane looked guilty. “I did not wake him on purpose,” he argued. “I know you don’t think I care. But I do. But I need to get up to London later and if Nick is going to stay asleep the whole time then I would be better going and then visiting another day when he is more awake.”
“You’re leaving already?” Sarah failed to keep the anger out of her voice, “ just because he’s asleep?” She paced up and down. “ you should want to be here”
Stephane looked down as he spoke, “I do Sarah. You don’t understand my business is…..”
“I don’t give a flying fuck about your business,” she hissed. “That’s your son in intensive care.” She entered his room and retrieved the wheely case and coat. “Here,” she shoved them at him. “Just go. I’ll text you when he’s awake.” She turned her back on Stephane and sat back down next to Nick, picking up his hand once more and concentrating on calming her breathing down.
Stephane stood in shock at the doorway. Sarah rarely swore when they were together. It just wasn’t her thing. So to hear her that cross, he knew she was angry. He quietly gathered his belongings and made his way out of the hospital. he’d return in a few days.

Nick slept for the rest of the afternoon and into the evening. He finally stirred once more as the nurse came in to do his final evening obs. His eyes fluttered open as she hung a new bag of fluids. “Evening sweetheart,” she said as she jotted down some information on his chart. “How are you feeling?” Nick looked from the nurse to his mum, “um…”he croaked out before coughing which caused him to wince in pain, “it’s ok darling,” Sarah said, holding a glass of water for him with a straw poking out the top, “have a sip.”
Nick accepted greatfully, then tried again, “what happened?” He asked a hint of fear in his voice. “Why am i in hospital?”
The nurse looked at Sarah, “now he’s more awake I’ll fetch the doctor so he can have a chat with Nick ok?” Sarah nodded , “thank you.”
Sarah squeezed Nicks hand, “what do you remember darling?”
Nick leaned back against the pillow. What did he remember? He remembered being at school and feeling rough. Oh god he remembered throwing up in class, that was so embarrassing. He could remember snippets of being at home, a weird memory of being in the car with Charlie….but nothing else.
“I’m not sure…” he sighed, closing his eyes against the brightness.
“Darling do you remember cutting your leg a little while ago? At rugby maybe?”
Nick thought for a bit. He was always hurting himself at rugby and he did have that scratch on his leg. He glanced at his leg then his eyes widened as he realised it was bandaged up. “Baby it got infected and you contracted sepsis. You’ve been really poorly my love.”
Nicks head was swimming. Sepsis? That was deadly, he knew that much. But it had only been a little cut? That didn’t make sense. His brain was still so foggy and tired he didn’t know how to process what he was being told so he just stared at his mum in shock. He could feel his heart rate rising as he began to panic. Was he going to die? . “Nicky?” Sarah frowned. The beeping of the heart monitor next to the bed was beginning to speed up, she could see he was panicking. “Hey, sweetheart look at me,” she took her hands and held them to the side of Nicks face, forcing him to just look at her, “you are going to be ok baby I promise. The doctor is really pleased with you. But sweetheart you need to calm down, breathe with me.” She exaggerated her breathing and it took a while but eventually Nick was able to follow her and calm his breathing down.
At that moment the doctor arrived, frowning at the monitors beside Nick. “Everything ok in here?” He asked. Sarah spoke to him without taking her eyes off Nick, “he just had a little panic when I told him what had happened. It’s ok now tho sweetheart.” Nick nodded. He was so confused and tired and felt so foggy but he trusted his mum more than anyone in the world. If she said he was ok then that was enough for him for now.
The doctor seemed satisfied with this and sat down beside Nick,
“Ok, time for an update I think. Nicholas it’s very nice to meet you properly,” he smiled kindly at Nick who tried to smile back but it came out more of a grimace, “ so lab results are still all looking more positive. Your urine output is on the rise which is the thing we were most worried about. Still not quite where we need it so we will continue dialysis for now.” Nick noticed the weird whirring machine for the first time but again didn’t have the mental capacity to think about it. “You are going to need an awful lot of rest young man, your body has been through hell. The good news is we’ve saved your leg and I’m not concerned about it anymore. I want to keep you in ICU today and then look to moving you down to HDU tomorrow. We still need to keep a close eye on you.”
Sarah beamed at Nick. “That’s wonderful news thank you so much doctor,” he smiled back at her then patted Nick on the shoulder. “Nick has done all the hard work, you should get some rest now son ok?”
He was barely out of the door before Nick had closed his eyes once more. Sarah watched him sleep with a new sense of calmness. He was going to be ok.

Chapter Text

Sarah sat down at the breakfast bar with her coffee. This was one of the rare occasions that she could actually sit with a coffee, knowing that Nick was okay. Diane had gone to the hospital for morning visiting hours after the school drop off, giving her a chance to have a long lie, shower and get a decent coffee before she would head up to the hospital at lunchtime. She had a meeting with Nick’s consultant this afternoon with an update on Nick’s kidney functions and she was hoping that Nicky was well enough to leave the HDU. Being on a regular ward didn’t just mean that his friends could visit it also meant that he was one step closing to being discharged all together and ready to come home. She was desperate for the day and she knew her son was, too. It had been an overwhelming week for everyone. Sarah sipped her coffee as she flicked through the morning newspaper. One headline in particular grasping her attention. She went on to read the article. She felt the anger bubble up inside of her as she read a story about a little 6 year old girl in Ireland who had contracted meningitis. Her mother spoke of how her daughter was misdiagnosed with a viral infection despite her asking them to carry out further tests as she had a feeling that it was something more than that. The little girl died and now her mother was suing the GP practice for medical negligence. Sarah blinked back her tears as she read the article. That poor poor mother, having to go through all of that. She knew her child was seriously sick, she knew it was more than just a virus but the doctors didn’t listen. Sarah suddenly felt very angry. The same thing could have happened to her, it very nearly did, given how seriously ill Nick was when she got him to the hospital. How rapidly his condition had deteriorated in the waiting room. If it hadn’t been for the fast acting actions of the medical staff at the hospital, things could have ended up so much differently. Nick could have died. She could be sitting here in the same position of that poor mother in Ireland. Having to arrange a funeral and bury her child because she wasn’t taken seriously by the NHS. It wasn’t right and it was happening far too often. Something had to be done about it. Sarah made a bold decision there and then as she picked up the phone.

Later that afternoon Sarah arrived at the hospital after picking up a coffee for herself and Diane and some lunch for Nick from the hospital cafeteria. He was starting to get his appetite back and the food from the cafe was much better tasting than the food served on the ward. She smiled when she entered the room. Nick was sitting upright in bed flicking through some school work that Charlie had dropped off so that he wouldn’t fall behind. “Hi sweetheart.” Sarah greeted as she walked into the room. She handed Diane her coffee and sat down before rummaging through the carrier bag. “Cheese and tomato toastie and some chips?” She told her son as she handed it over. Nick grinned. He was hungry, properly for the first time since getting poorly. “Thanks mum.” Sarah smiled as she ruffled his hair. “No problem, baby,” she then pulled out a slice a chocolate cake. Nick smirked. “You’ll get kicked out for sneaking in food.” “it’s worth it to see you have your appetite back.” She chucked as she sat down and sipped her coffee.

“I…I made a phone call this afternoon.” Sarah hesitantly announced, glancing between her sister and son. Diane glanced at her sister, waiting for her to continue. “I made a formal complaint against the NHS, specifically against the GP clinic on Byers Road.” Sarah replied. Diane sat her coffee down. She wasn’t expecting that. Nick frowned. Why? Why would his mum put a complaint in. It didn’t seem like something that she’d normally do. “Why?” He asked. What had he missed? “Nicky…you nearly died, sweetheart.” Sarah sighed reaching out to hold his hand as his frown deepened. “I tried to get you a doctor’s appointment. I knew something was wrong. You were so poorly, baby.” She said, tearing up slightly as she recounted the ordeal. “I was scared, I didn’t know what to do. They wouldn’t give me an appointment because you apparently weren’t sick enough.” She fumed. “I thought, okay, maybe they are over busy, but you just kept getting sicker…I phoned nhs 24 for some advice and they palmed me off as well…I…I dread to think what might have happened if I hadn’t taken you to the hospital when I did..” she choked back some tears. “The doctors here have been great, though.” Diane replied. Sarah couldn’t agree more but that wasn’t the point, nor the principle. If Nick had been seen sooner by a GP. This could have all been prevented. “If they’d just been able to give you an appointment. This could have all been avoided…” Nick glanced at his mum. He didn’t like seeing her get upset. “Mum…it’s okay.” He said. “I’m okay.” He added. Sarah gave him a teary smile as she reached out and squeezed his hand. “Yes, and I am forever thankful.” She said, rubbing his arm. “I read an article in the paper this morning..” she sighed. “A little girl in I Ireland…she was wrongly diagnosed with a flu virus, when she really had meningitis..” She explained. “She…uh…she died.” She watched as her sister gasped, er hand flying towards her mouth. “6 years old…mother is suing hospital for medical negligence.” “Oh my gosh….that poor family.” Diane said. Nick’s eyes widened. That could have been him. He could have died. “I can’t just stand back and allow it to keep happening. Something has to change I almost lost you, baby.” She said in a choked voice as she reached out and ran her hand through Nick’s hair. “I almost lost you..”

The next day the doctor visited with good news. “We are pleased with how your kidney functions have improved so we are going to try you off the dialysis. We’d also like to try and get you up and about. It’s important we get you moving, the last thing you need is a blood clot in that leg of yours.” Sarah smiled at Nick, “that’s amazing news baby,” she squeezed his hand, “isn’t it?” Nick wasn’t sure how to feel. He knew he should be happy that he was getting better and he was, but he was also a bit frightened. What happened if he came off the dialysis and his kidneys didn’t work? What if he couldn’t walk on his sore leg,? He had so little energy at the moment, even the thought of walking to the bathroom seemed like an impossible task. “Uh yeah,” he said quietly, Sarah frowned at him. Once the doctor left, stating that a nurse would be by later to bring him upstairs to remove his catheter for the dialysis, she took his hand. “Baby, talk to me? What’s worrying you?” Nick pulled himself into a sitting position, Sarah helped alter the controls on the bed so he was comfy. He sighed, “I know it’s good news, I guess I’m just a bit scared that something will go wrong.” He felt tears spring to the corner of his eyes. Sarah immediately pulled him into a hug, rubbing his back gently. “Oh sweetheart that’s totally understandable. But the doctors wouldn’t be doing it if they didn’t think you were ready. We have to trust them ok?” Though as she said that she thought back to how she’d been fobbed off by the doctors in the first place. But the doctors here had been amazing, she had to trust them. Nick nodded into her shoulder, sniffing. “Yeah I know. I’m just so tired mum, I’m not sure I’ll be able to get out of bed.” Sarah kissed the top of his head as she sat back and let Nick lean back against his pillows, “just do your best ok? If anything is too much just speak out. It’s ok to take it slowly baby, your body has been through hell the last week.”

Nick nodded and allowed himself to doze once more. It felt like seconds later he was being shaken awake by Sarah, “The nurse is here to remove the dialysis catheter sweetie.” Nicks eyes widened quickly, “does it hurt?” He asked her. She shook her head, “we’ll give you a mild anaesthetic so you’ll be asleep while we do it. It’ll only take half an hour tops ok? Nothing to worry about.” Nick gave her a Weak smile as she switched off the dialysis machine and readied his bed for movement. Sarah followed beside him up into the lift until they reached the double doors to the surgical unit and she had to stay behind. She kissed him On the forehead and stroked his hair, “I’ll wait right here baby. One of the benefits of being so exhausted was that Nick didn’t really have time to worry much about the surgery. He dozed as they took him through and the anaesthesia knocked him out quickly. The next thing he knew he was back in his room, his mum sat by his side scrolling on her phone. She noticed him opening his eyes and smiled broadly. “Everything went well baby, just rest for a bit”
Nick relaxed back against his pillow and closed his eyes.

It was a couple of hours later when he woke, realising he needed the bathroom for the first time since he arrived. His catheter had been removed. He needed to get out of bed. He cracked his eyes open and was relieved to see his mum still sitting beside him, her head in a romance novel “Mum?” He whispered, causing her to look up sharply. “I need the toilet.” Sarah’s face softened. “Ok baby let me fetch a nurse and we can get you there.” Nick fought down his anxieties and worries as she reappeared with a nurse in tow. “Right Nick, let’s get you up and about!” He made short work on disconnecting Nick from his various wires and tubes. He raised the back of the bed so Nick was upright. “Ok, gently swing your legs over, feet flat on the floor.” Nick took a deep breath before doing as instructed. He felt the blood rushing down to his foot on his injured leg, the immediate feeling of pressure and pain hit him and he gasped. “That hurts a bit,” he gritted. The nurse looked sympathetic. “I know, you’ve had that leg elevated for a good few days. It’s going to feel odd. Just rest there a minute and let the feelings all come back.” Nick wiggled his toes experimentally. After a couple of minutes the throbbing died down and he nodded at the nurse. “Ok, take my arm and stand up slowly.” Nick followed his instructions and began hobbling slowly towards the bathroom which was thankfully right opposite his room. The few steps there completely wore him out and he sat down on the toilet seat to catch his breath. “Good work Nick!” The nurse said enthusiastically, “I’ll give you some privacy, any problems pull that red chord there and I’ll be straight in ok?” Nick nodded gratefully.

It felt good to be able to do something as simple as peeing by himself again. He looked at his reflection in the mirror as he washed his hands and was taken aback at how pale he looked. His hair was greasy and messy, he had circles under his eyes and he looked gaunt. Sighing he left the bathroom and was helped slowly back to bed. The ten minute ordeal had exhausted him And he desperately wanted to sleep. But he knew Charlie was coming by and he really didn’t want to sleep through it again. “Mum? Promise me you’ll wake me when Charlie gets here?”
Sarah gave him a soft smile. “I promise sweetheart, just get some rest.” it felt like he closed his eyes for a minute before he felt someone gently shaking his shoulder. “Nick?” He opened his eyes and smiled at Charlie who was peering over him with such love and affection it warmed his heart. “Hi.” He said quietly, revelling in the feeling of Charlie stroking his hair gently. “Sorry my hair is so gross and greasy.”
Charlie scoffed. Oh for goodness sake I don’t care if it’s greasy Nicholas!” Nick grinned. “So how do you feel? Your mum said you got out of bed earlier? That’s amazing!” Nick gave a small smile, “yeah I guess. Just to the bathroom and back and it wiped me out. But it felt nice to be upright for a minute.” Charlie squeezed his hand, “I’m so proud of you.” He hesitated. “What’s the matter?” Nick asked scrunching his forehead in confusion. “Well….i was talking to the gang earlier, and they really wanted to come by and see you? I told them you might be too tired or asleep or whatever but they came anyway just on the off chance? They are waiting in the waiting room….”
Nicks eyes widened and he felt the beginnings of panic. Was he ready for visitors? He looked so rough, would they be pitying him? He’d hate that. Charlie sensed his hesitation, “hey, I can tell them you are too tired if you like? They all love you babe, they just want to see how you are doing.”
Nick nodded slowly, “yeah ok. It would be nice to see them.” Charlie beamed, “great! I’ll get Tara and Darce first!” He kissed Nick gently on the lips and rushed out to find his friends. Tara, Darcy, Tao, Elle, Isaac and Imogen were all huddled together in the waiting room. They looked up anxiously as Charlie arrived. “What did he say?” Asked Tara, “was he cross that we came without asking?”
Charlie smiled, “no course not. I think he’s a bit nervous to see you all. He’s still really tired, I had to wake him up. So maybe just a quick hello for today and then when he’s up on a normal ward you guys can stay longer.” Everyone nodded their agreement and paired up ready to go and see Nick for the first time in what felt like forever.

Tara and Darcy went first. Darcy was clutching an enormous stuffed dog that looked a bit like Henry, while Tara had a bag full of sweets and magazines. They approached the room and peeked their heads in. Nick was sat up, anxiously trying to straighten up his hair. They immediately noticed how pale he was. And that he still had some tubes attached. But he was smiling softly at them looking a little nervous. Darcy immediately bounced into the room and thrust the stuffed dog at him, “Nicky nacky noo! You scared us all half to death!” She flung her arms round him and he chuckled as he hugged her back. “Yeah, sorry Darce, I scared myself for a while.” Tara sat next to him quietly, then took his hand and squeezed it, tears in her eyes. “Don’t ever scare us like that again ok?” She whispered tearily. Nick squeezed her back, “I’ll try not to.” She handed him the bag of goodies, seeing his eyes light up at the array of sweets inside, “we won’t stay long, we know you need to rest but we just needed to see for ourselves that you are ok.” Nick smiled bashfully, “thank you for coming. It means a lot that you did.”

Of course we would come Nicholas! You are our favourite ginger! “Darcy teased. “Oi, not ginger thank you very much.” Nick replied laughing.
They stayed for a couple more minutes before swapping first with Tao and Elle and finally Isaac and Imogen. Nick was exhausted and Isaac could see he was barely able to keep his eyes open as they chatted. He handed Nick a couple of books he’d brought for him to read and Imogen gave him some hand cream. “Thanks guys,” he whispered, slightly overwhelmed by all the love from his friends.”sorry I’m not great company.”
“We don’t need you to entertain us Nicholas,” Imogen smiled as she tousled his hair. “Just get better ok?”
Charlie popped in to say goodbye once the others had left. Nick was already half asleep but managed to stay awake for a quick cuddle. “I love you,” Charlie whispered into his hair as he hugged him. “Love you too,” Nick replied, his eyes already closing as he let out a yawn. “Sleep well babe,” Charlie waited until nick’s breathing had evened out and he was sure he was asleep before tiptoeing out quietly. Sarah was in the canteen getting some food so he went to find her.
“How did it go love?” She asked as Charlie approached. He smiled at her, “really well. I think he enjoyed seeing everyone. It really tired him out though, he’s fast asleep now. He really doesn’t have any energy at all does he?” Sarah sighed, “No I think it’s going to be a while before we get the old Nick back. We just need to be patient and give him time.” Charlie nodded, “he can take as long as he needs. I can’t really believe all that’s happened to him these past few days.” He didn’t think he’d ever get the image of Nick collapsing out of his head. Or seeing him in icu unconscious and hooked up to so many machines. He’d keep Nick wrapped up in bubble wrap for the rest of his days if he could.
Sarah knew how Charlie felt. “It’s been a hellish week or so hasn’t it. Thank you for being so supportive and loving Nick so much.”
Charlie blushed at the praise, “he’s pretty easy to love Sarah,” he smiled. She chuckled, “yeah he is. Do you need a lift home sweetheart?” Charlie shook his head, “mums in the car park waiting for me. Can I come again tomorrow?” “Of course love, come whenever you like.”
After saying goodbye to Charlie Sarah popped to check on Nick who was out for the count. She kissed him softly, “ I’ll be back in the morning darling, sleep well.”

Nick remained in the HDU for two more days before the doctors were happy to discharge him to a regular ward. Nick felt like he was improving but it was still so slow. He wanted to go home. He had a physio who visited him twice a day and made him go for walks to keep him moving. He found it all so exhausting it was hard not to snap and get cross. But the physio whose name was Andy, was patient and seemed immune to his grumbles. They were returning from a walk around the ward when Nick looked up to see David sitting by his bed. His heart sank. He had been trying to avoid speaking to his brother. He would pretend to be asleep usually. But he couldn’t do that this time. He’d have to talk to him, at least until his mum arrived to rescue him.

“Hey,” David said as Nick sat down with a huff on his bed. “Took you long enough, how far did you walk?” Nick glared at him “sorry for keeping you waiting,” he said sarcastically. “Sorry my illness is such an inconvenience.” David held up his hands in surrender, “chill out I was only joking. God. Where’s your sense of humour.” Nick rolled his eyes and then laid back in bed shutting his eyes, he was ready for a nap. But David wasn’t getting the hint. “I wanted to talk to you.”
“Yeah? What about.” Replied Nick without opening his eyes.
David paused, swallowing. He tried to think of the right words. Nick cracked one eye open as he waited for his response. “David?”
David sighed. “I wanted to say sorry,” he said causing Nick to open both eyes wide in surprise. “I know I’ve been a bit of a dick to you….” “Understatement of the century,” scoffed Nick. “Yeah I know,” David said quietly. “But seeing you so poorly in hospital, I guess I just realised I didn’t want you to die and the last thing that happened between us was me being a twat about your love life.” He looked at Nick who was eyeing him curiously. “ I want to try to be a better big brother. I know it’s going to take more than words but I wanted to tell you I’m sorry and that I’m going to try to do better.” He looked hopefully at Nick who was laying in stunned silence. David was apologising? He had not seen that coming. Maybe his near death experience had an upside to it. But could he really trust David to change after all this time? Before he could answer David spoke again. “I dont expect you to believe me. But can I ask you to try and keep an open mind? I want to be better.”
Nick searched his brothers face for any sign of bullshit but amazingly found none. “Ok,” he finally replied, “I’ll give you a chance to prove it. But you have to apologise to Charlie too.”
“I will,” David said seriously “thank you. I’ll leave you to rest now, but maybe I can come again tomorrow?”
“Shouldn’t you be back in Glasgow by now? “ Nick asked. “I’m staying until you get out of here. To help mum out, and just to be near really”
“Ok, come tomorrow then,” Nick gave him a small smile and watched him walk away. That was the most surreal chat, he thought to himself. Charlie was going to lose his mind.

When Charlie visited later that evening. Nick was propped up in bed, the giant dog plushy that his friends had brought him was beside him on the bed. Nick had a textbook open on the little moving tray attached to his bed, although he didn’t look like he was paying much attention to it as he twirled his little medical bracelet around his wrist, clearly trapped in his own mind. “Earth to Nick?” Charlie smirked as he entered the room properly and strode up towards the bed, plopping himself down on one of the plastic seats Nick snapped out of his trance as he dropped his pen. “Hi..” He grinned, seeing his boyfriend. “Hi.” Charlie grinned. “Studying? You must be bored…” “I am extremely bored, char.” Nick sighed as he closed over his science book. “Less bored now that you are here, though.” He smirked. “Glad to hear it.” “David came earlier.’ Nick said suddenly. “He didn’t upset you, did he?” Charlie asked, suddenly becoming very protective of his boyfriend. David Nelson could be a complete and utter toss pot sometimes and he didn’t want him purposely riling Nick up, especially when he has been so poorly. “He apologised..” Nick mumbled. “What?” Charlie replied, she’ll shocked. That was not what he was expecting to hear. “He apologised for it all, Charlie…”. Nick was still sort of reeling himself from the earlier conversation with his brother. “From being a total arsehole towards me whilst we were growing up, invading my privacy and acting like a total dick when he found out I’m bisexual..” Nick explained. Charlie just listened. He’d never imagined David Nelson to be capable of apologising, but here we are. “He apologised for basically outing me to dad.” Charlie grimaced. He still got angry when he thought about that. David had snatched that right away from his little brother. The right to decide who knew about his sexuality and when they knew. “He wants to do better…” “What did you say?” Charlie asked curiously. “Nothing..” Nick replied. “I think I was a little stunned. David never apologises.” Nick sighed. “He told me he was petrified I was going to die…” “Well…he wasn’t the only one.” Charlie replied. Nick gave his boyfriend a small smile. “I guess it’s just weird coming from him…like seeing him acting like he genuinely cares. I have never seen that side of David before.” “He’s still your brother, I guess..” Charlie shrugged. He knew deep down that David would probably be devastated if something happened to Nick. He just had to learn how to be less of an arsehole. “I told him that he has to apologise to you first though before I even consider forgiving him..” Charlie raised his eyebrow. Now that wasn’t going to happen. Ever. Pigs had more chance of flying, first. “He has been completely bang out of order and just plain nasty to you since he discovered that we’re going out.” Nick sighed. “If he wants to be in my life and try and rebuild our relationship, then he apologises to you first. Simple.” Charlie smiled softly as he leaned over and kissed his boyfriend on the lips. “I love you Nicholas Nelson.” Nick smiled against his boyfriends soft lips. “I love you Charlie Spring.”

The next day. Nick was sitting up in bed flicking through a F1 magazine that his uncle Rich had brought him. He had eaten lunch. Cleared his plate, much to the delight of his nurse. His temperature was completely down. The nurse had literally jumped in glee whist doing his morning jobs when the thermometer had read a crisp 36.3. He seemed to getting on perfectly fine without the kidney dialysis. His most recent scan came back clear, no visible signs of decline. Both surgical wounds on his leg and foot were healing nicely. Sarah entered the ward. She’d received a text from Stèphane this morning that had put her in a foul mood. It had stated that he was back in Paris. He had to fly back a few days ago as he had a very important meeting to attend to and that he hadn’t had time to come back to the hospital and visit Nick. Bullshit. He had a choice. Of course he did. He had just chosen the wrong one. He had went on to ask her to give Nick his best wishes and that he promises that he will visit soon. Pointless promises. Empty promises. Sarah was fizzing. How had she ever felt anything romantically towards that man? It just angered her so much. David and Nick deserved so much better than their father. He wasn’t a father. A name on a birth certificate meant nothing. He didn’t behave like a father. She decided that she wasn’t going to get hung up on it though as she approached Nick’s room. She wasn’t going to stress him out. He was doing so well in. his recovery She refused to let this set him back.

“Hi darling…” She smiled as she entered the room. Nick smiled widely at her as she entered. “Hey!” “Someone’s looking chirpy today.” Sarah grinned. The nurse who was hovering at the side of the bed administering the last of Nick’s antibiotics smiled at Sarah. “His fever is completely down.” She announced. Sarah grinned as she slapped the back of her hand against Nick’s forehead and smiled as all she felt was cool skin. Nick’s temperature had been fluctuating for days, so it was total relief to find it was normal. “That’s great.” “The doctor will be around shortly with an update.” She smiled kindly as she left the room. “Guess who I bumped in to this morning in Asda.” Sarah smiled as she sat down. “Who?” Nick asked, intrigued as he put his magazine down. “Coach Singh.” Sarah replied. “She was asking after you. Can’t wait to have you back on the team when you’re fully recovered.” Nick smiled the first properly genuine smile that he had in days at the mention of rugby. “I did tell her it won’t be for a while, though..” “Muuumm..” Nick whined. “Nicky…” Sarah replied firmly. “It’s still going to take some time until you’ve fully got your strength back. One step at a time, baby.” She reminded him. Nick sighed, but nodded. She was right. She was always right. They sat chatting for the next half an hour before a knock at the door interrupted them and Nick’s consultant walked in. “How are you feeling today Nicholas?” “Fine.” Nick replied. He felt the best that he had in days. “Im glad to hear it..” The doctor smiled. “I am really impressed with your recent blood work..” Sarah smiled. This sounded like a positive chat. “So much so that I don’t see any need for you to continue staying in hospital..” Nick’s eyes widened. Did he hear that right? He was getting to go home. “He’s really well enough?” Sarah asked, equally as shocked as Nick. The doctor smiled and nodded. “I am not saying that you are 100% recovered yet. You will probably feel tired and weak for sometime but nothing that some good old fashioned bed rest at home won’t cure.” “Thank you!” Sarah told the doctor sincerely as her eyes began to well up. A week ago she hadnt believed that they would get here. A week ago she was told to prepare herself for the worst. That her son might die and now she was being told that he was well enough to be discharged. She felt so blessed and so lucky. Not everyone got this outcome. “You don’t have to thank me.” The doctor smiled softly. ‘I’m just doing my job.” “You saved my son’s life.” Sarah said tearily. ‘If it wasn’t for you and the wonderful team you have here. I might have lost Nicky.” Sarah blinked back tears. “So, just thank you.” She said as she gave him a sincere hug before hugging her son. “You’re coming home, baby.” She happy cried. “I will sort out the discharge paper work.” The doctor announced before leaving them to process the good news. “I need to call your Nan and Auntie Di and Uncle Rich.” Sarah said reaching for her phone. “Oh and your brother. I knew there was a reason that I stripped your bed this morning.” Nick chuckled as his mum. He couldn’t believe it. He was going home. He was finally getting to go home. He would get to be in his own house, in his own bed and be reunited with Nellie and Henry. He couldn’t wait but there was one person that he had to tell right away. He reached over on to his bedside table and retrieved his phone before sending a text to Charlie.

“Guess who’s coming home today??”

Chapter Text

Sarah pulled up in an empty bay of the school carpark. It was mayhem. A bright yellow and blue coach was parked outside the gates of Truham and there was a constant sea of people inside and outside the gates.  It was a Saturday morning and it marked the year 10 and 11 trip to Paris.    Sarah turned the engine off and reached in to the glove compartment and pulled out a pharmacy bag before plopping it in to her son’s lap. Nick gave her a pointed look before he peered inside.  Travel sickness pills, a box of travel bands and a bundle of folded up sick bags.   Travel sickness.  Nick had suffered from it for as long as she could remember.  He was fine in the car, as long as it was short journeys.  The school drop offs and pick ups had never been an issue. But long coach journeys.  It was always better to be organised than sorry and, don’t even get her started on plane rides. The vivid memory of last year’s Minorca holiday imprinted in her mind. She spent the majority of the flight rubbing soothing circles on her sons back as he proceeded to get sick in the brown paper bag that the airline had kindly provided.

“I don’t need them anymore.”  Nick replied as he held the bag back out to her.  Sarah raised her eyebrow and gave him a look.  “Nicky..”

“I haven’t gotten car sick in ages.” Nick argued. In reality he didn’t want his classmates, his friends to know that he suffered from motion sickness, at least not Charlie.

“Shall I remind you of the flight to Minorca last year??” Sarah replied.  “You spent the duration of the flight throwing up in a paper bag and napping on my shoulder.” She reminded him, watching in amusement as Nick’s cheeks burnt red in embarrassment.  “Honey, there’s nothing to be ashamed about.” She told him.  “Lots of people suffer from travel sickness and I bet you’re not the only one on this trip taking travel medicine.”   Nick glanced at his mum. She was right. She was always right.  But he wasn’t ready to whip out the pills on a crowded bus yet so he popped two from the blister packet and swallowed them down with some water and securing one of the travel bands on his wrist before cramming the white paper pharmacy bag in to his backpack    “Trust me, you’ll be thankful that you have them if,  no, when you need them.”

Nick sighed. She was right, again.  “Thanks mum.” He smiled as he unclipped his seatbelt.  He opened the door and headed round to the back of the car, opening the boot and pulling out his luggage. Sarah got out of the car.  “You’ll call me as soon as you get to Paris?” She reminded him.  Nick smiled softly and nodded.  “Yes, of course…”  Sarah smiled again before pulling her son in to a right embrace.  “I’ll miss you, darling.”  Nick chuckled as he hugged her tightly.  “It’s 5 days mum.”  He would miss her too, though. He wasn’t used to being away from home, being away from his mum and Nellie.   “5 long days.” Sarah corrected him as she pulled away.   “I’ve informed Mr Ajayi and Mr Farouk of your travel sickness…”  Nick let out a long groan. That was not necessary. The last thing he wanted was being fussed over. It really wasn’t a big deal.  Sarah just chuckled at her son. He’d thank her for her every-always over prepared and organised thinking, later.

Nick said his goodbyes to his mum and walked up to the coach.   “Nick!” He spun around to see Charlie.  He smiled, widely. There he was.  He just couldn’t wait to be able to spend 5 days with Charlie but, then he remembered the agreement of them staying lowkey in Paris. Nick clearly wasn’t ready to be out in front of the entire school, not yet. The end of term bonfire party that had taken place a few nights before hadn’t gone as planned. He had made the decision that he was going to come out to some of the rugby boys, at least, but when it came down to the crunch. He couldn’t do it, he ended up having to leave early with a pounding headache, feeling sick to his stomach and being tucked up in bed by 9:30pm on a Friday.  If he couldn’t even come out to a couple of his mates without experiencing crippling anxiety. How on earth was he supposed to come out fully, to everyone.

“You sure about keeping it low-key?” Nick asked Charlie as he placed both of their luggage in the baggage hold on the coach.  “Yeah.” Charlie nodded. “We probably shouldn’t sit next to each other on the bus.”   Nick felt his stomach knot. He hadn’t even thought about that. The journey to Paris was going to take around 8 hours.  8 hours sitting next to someone else when he should be sitting next to Charlie. His boyfriend.   “It could be fun.” Charlie said, snapping Nick out of his thoughts.  “Being a secret again.”  Nick forced a smile on his face and nodded. “Yeah.”  “But…” Charlie started with a smirk on his face.  “I bet you can’t last 2 days without kissing me..” he challenged.  Nick inhaled.  “Oh, is that a challenge I hear?” He replied as he moved round towards the front of the bus, Charlie right behind him.  “Maybe.”  Nick just laughed as they joined the line of students piling on to the coach.    “Hello, you two.” Mr Ajayi greeted them both as they boarded the coach.  Charlie was the first to walk down the aisle of the coach coming at a stop at the empty seat next to Issac. Nick sighed as he stopped in his tracks as realisation hit him that Charlie had been right about them not sitting together. He knew it was probably the smart thing to do, they wouldn’t attract attention this way, at least not yet. He wasn’t completely ready for the whole school to know that he was bisexual yet.   He glanced around himself, not quite knowing what to do with himself or where to sit.  He spotted an empty seat next to Tao and sucked in a deep breath before occupying it. Here goes nothing.  He thought to himself.  He noticed the foul look on Tao’s face as he scoffed and shoved his EarPods in to his ear. Nick sighed. This was going to be a long journey.  He glanced up as Elle got on to the bus, maybe he wouldn’t have sat next to Tao after all.  He hadno idea what he’d done to make the other boy dislike him so much.

“Elle, do you want to sit next to Tao?” He asked quickly as she walked past them. Elle stopped in her tracks, glanced at both boys and shook her head.  “No, I’m going to sit with the girls.” She told them as she moved in to the row, behind them, next to Sahar.   Nick sighed.  This was going to be a long 8 hours. He connected his earphones to his phone and leaned his head back against the headrest as the coach began to pull away from the school.  He glanced back at Charlie who was chatting away to Issac. Oh how he wished they were sat next to one another.

It was roughly about 2 hours in to the journey when Nick started to feel a little sick. Damn, the tablets and the travel band for not doing their job, properly. Nick closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Mr Ajayi had announced a short while ago that they would be pulling in to a service station in about 45 minutes.  Not long and he could get off the bus and get some fresh air and then he would feel better. He was now regretting having breakfast that morning as the toast and eggs and generous amount of orange juice was now threatening to make a reappearance. He felt a buzz and glanced down to his phone screen. Papa calling decorated the screen. He grimaced. His father picked his times. Especially when Nick had been messaging him constantly for weeks, trying to arrange possibly meeting up whilst he’s in Paris but getting ignored.  He sighed as he answered the call.

“Hello!”

“Hello Nicholas. I’m sorry I haven’t responded to your messages. I have been very busy with work..”

“That’s ok, dad.” Nick responded. It was always the same excuses. Work. Work and
Work. He didn’t expect anything else from his father these days.

“So. Tell me about this school trip you’re taking soon to the Paris…”

“Well…actually, I’m on the coach right now.”  Nick responded. Of course his father would know this information had he looked at his text messages recently. Nick had been very specific about the dates that he would be visiting Paris.

“Oh. I didn’t realise it was this week.”

“I did message you. We’re about 3 hours into the drive.” Nick explained.  “Can we still meet up? I’d love to see you.”

“Yes! That would be great. I can message you when I’m free.”  Stéphane replied.

“You promise you’ll have time? I haven’t seen you in ages…”. Nick responded. He glanced to his side to find Tao staring at him with a confused expression on his face. Oh yeah, he may have forgotten to mention that he’s half French.

“I promise.”  Nick knew that his dad had a tendency to break promises but surely he would make the effort to meet up with his son, especially when he’s in the same country.

“Okay! Great!” Nick beamed, grimacing as his stomach started doing somersaults.

“I have to go, Nick. I have a meeting starting in 10 minutes. I will message you soon. Okay?”

“Okay! Bye, dad…”  Nick ended the call and brought his phone away from his ear before looking at Tao, who was frowning.

“What the hell was that?” Tao replied, clearly shocked to find out that Nick knew how to speak fluently in French.

“Oh.” Nick nodded, understanding.  “My dad.”

“Your dads French?” Tao questioned, surprised by the information. Charlie’s never mentioned that before. Wait. Did Charlie even know?  He’d never heard Nick’s dad being mentioned before, he knew his parents were divorced, but that was about it.

“Yeah.” Nick nodded as he shoved his phone back in to his pocket. He noticed Tao giving him a quizzical look.  “What?” He questioned. Tao shrugged.  “Oh…nothing, just surprising I guess…”

Nick just raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything else. He honestly didn’t think it was a big deal. His dad was French? There was nothing else to it.

“Alright everyone!” Mr Ajayi announced. “We will be stopping at services in roughly five minutes. We will only be stopping for approximately twenty minutes. So please use this time wisely if you need to use the restrooms or purchase refreshments. If you’re not back on the coach, we will leave you here.”

Nick let out a relieved sigh. 5 minutes. He could hold off five minutes.  Couldn’t he???

Nick was the first off the coach when it pulled in to the service station. He didn’t even wait for Charlie to get off the bus. He needed to find the rest room and quick. He followed the signs and rushed inside the building towards the toilets as fast as his legs would take him. He raced inside, pushing through door to the gents, throwing open one of the little cubicle doors and dropping down to his knees just in time as a fountain of vomit sprayed directly in to the toilet bowl. He had literally just made it in time or else he would have puked all down himself.  When he was sure he wasn’t going to vomit again, Nick stood up, flushed the toilet, washed his hands and then made a swift dive in to WHSmiths to purchase a bottle of water and packet of mints. Two essentials he badly needed right now. He popped a mint into his mouth and then caught up with his friends.

“Nick?? Where did you go?” Charlie asked. He had been so confused when he got off the coach and couldn’t find his boyfriend and he had been even more confused when Tao had told him that Nick had practically legged it the moment the bus came to a stop.  “I really had to piss.” Nick lied. Charlie studied him suspiciously. He looked a little pale, and his forehead had a thin sheen on sweat on it. “You sure you’re ok?”
Nick nodded quickly, “I’m fine Char, honest.” He glanced over to the coach where he could see students clambering noisily back up the steps. His heart sank. He really didn’t want to get back on there. His stomach still felt a little unsteady. a little better now he had thrown up but definitely not right. He sighed, “guess we’d better get back on the coach,” Charlie followed his gaze and nodded his agreement. He side eyed Nick on the walk across the car park but he wasn’t giving anything away. “You ok next to Tao?” Nick grimaced slightly, “yeah,” he hesitated…..”what’s up?” Charlie waited for his response. “I still don’t think he likes me much,” he admitted. “He’s not very chatty“ he added.
Charlie smiled sympathetically, he really wished Tao would be nicer to Nick. He understood his reservations but he just wished he would trust Charlie’s judgement. “Do you want to switch for the next bit? Sit next to Isaac?”
Nick hesitated, that sounded really nice. He knew Isaac didn’t have an issue with him. But this was his chance to try and win round Tao a bit. If he swapped seats that would probably piss Tao off even more. Now if Charlie had offered him to swap with Isaac so they could sit together he’d probably have taken him up on it. But he knew why he hadn’t suggested that. “No, it’s ok,” he finally replied as they reached the coach, “I’ll try and win him over with my unique charm,” Charlie chuckled, checking nobody was watching before carefully brushing his fingertips against nicks. “See you in France,” he grinned before hopping up onto the coach. Nick smiled, took a deep breath of fresh air and then, slightly less enthusiastically climbed up the steps.
The driver had switched off the engine while they were parked up so immediately the coach felt hot and stuffy. Nick approached his seat, Tao was already sat down with a face like thunder. He was staring at Elle, who was laughing and joking with the girls. “Hey,” Nick said as he sat back down and put his seatbelt on. “Alright?” Tao grunted back before putting his headphones back in and facing the window. Nick sighed, he kind of wished he could ask to sit by the window instead. It always helped him if he could focus on the world outside. But Tao’s body language was most definitely, ‘leave me the fuck alone.’ He rummaged in his bag for his AirPods, selecting a playlist of upbeat songs to try and lift his mood.
“Right everyone,” came the loud voice of Mr Farouk. Nick paused his music to listen.
“We will be at the port soon. We won’t be getting off the coach, just stay in your seat, seatbelts remain on please. Once we are through the tunnel it’s a couple more hours to Paris.” Everyone cheered. Nick cast a glance back at Charlie who was smiling happily with Isaac.
The coach engine roared to life and they set off once more. Instantly Nick felt sick again. He tried to keep his eyes on the road ahead as his mum had taught him. Pretend you are driving Nicky, she would say. Drivers never get car sick. He kept his eyes on the road but it was difficult half way down the coach. He stuck his head out slightly so he could see down the aisle way. “What are you doing?” Tao’s voice cut through his music. “Oh, um….just looking to see where we are going?” His reply sounded more like a question. Tao stared at him. “ we are going to Paris.”
Nick chuckled, “yeah I know that. I just like to see the road.”
“You don’t get car sick do you?” He asked with a shudder, “if you barf on me you will never hear the end of it.” Nicks eyes widened. “Um, no…” he stuttered out. “ I won’t be sick. I’m fine, I just like looking where I’m going.”
Tao seemed satisfied with the response and went back to moodily staring out the window.
Nick watched the road for the next fifteen minutes until finally he saw Dover port on the horizon and they slowed down to join the queue of coaches waiting to board the train. He sighed with relief, instantly feeling better now the coach had stopped. He glanced back to Charlie and Isaac. Charlie was staring at him, his phone in his hand. He pointed at it meanfully. Nick took a second to realise what he was trying to say, before pulling his phone out of his pocket and seeing the message from Charlie on his Lockscreen.

Charlie: I wish we were sitting together. 🥺 how’s it going with Tao? Won him over yet?

Nick smiled as he replied,
Nick: I do too….i hate that we can’t sit together. You sure about keeping it low key?

He glanced over to check Tao wasn’t looking before adding….

No luck winning him over yet. Maybe when we get across the border his mood will lift? He keeps staring at Elle. 😬

He sent the message and looked back to see Charlie open it with a smile. Dots appeared immediately on the screen to show he was replying.

Charlie: best leave him in peace when he’s in this kind of mood. Isaac says hi btw.

Nick turned and grinned at them both, giving Isaac a little wave.

Nick: I wish we could get off this coach. Can’t wait to get to get there. Shame I can’t kiss you or I’ll lose the challenge. 😜
Charlie: oh you’ll lose the challenge Nelson. No way you can resist my charm. 😘
Nick: you are a menace Charlie spring. I will win the challenge!
Charlie: we’ll see. Better go. See you in Paris xx

Nick hearted the message and put his phone back. The coach slowly snaked its way through the queue and onto the train and before long they were making their way through the tunnel to France. Nick breathed a sigh of relief. He didn’t get sick on the tunnel. He’d done this journey plenty of times to visit his dad in France when he was younger. Back when he used to see his dad every summer. He’d always been so excited for his trips to see him and every single year he’d end up spending more time with a babysitter in his dad’s apartment while his dad did his ‘important’ work. He felt nervous at the thought of seeing his dad on this trip. He really wanted to introduce him to Charlie and tell him that they were together. He wasn’t sure how his dad would take it. He had fairly old fashioned views. He wished he didn’t care so much what his dad thought about him, he wished he didn’t crave his approval so much. Life would be so much easier if he didn’t care what his absent father thought of him. He sighed.
Tao glanced over,”sorry,” he said quickly. He rummaged in his bag for his pack of mints. “Want one?” He offered the pack to Tao who took one, “thanks.”
“Is everything ok?” Nick looked at Tao, “you are very quiet.”
Tao stared out the window. Nick thought maybe he hadn’t heard him but then he quietly said, “things are weird between Elle and me. I don’t know what I’ve done wrong.” He turned to face Nick. Nick looked at him sympathetically. “That sucks, have you tried asking her?
Tao tutted, “just leave it, I don’t want to talk about it.” He turned away again. Nick decided not to push, it was progress Tao had said anything to him at all!

Before long they arrived in France and the coach left the train. Nick took a sip of his water, he had started to feel sick again. He took slow breaths and tried to keep from panicking. He knew they still had a long way to go before they arrived in the centre of Paris. He tried to ignore the swooping feeling in his tummy. It felt like the inside of a washing machine. His head had started aching, he felt hot and clammy. He was not going to be sick on the coach in front of everyone. He’d never live it down. He glanced around, everyone had quietened down since the excitement of first driving on the wrong side of the road and people were snoozing, chatting or playing games. He took a shuddering breath, tasing bile at the back of his throat. Shit. Shit, he was not going to make it to the hotel without being sick. He quickly found one of the sick bags his mum had packed for him and he clutched it tightly as he closed his eyes and willed his stomach to relax. He could feel himself panicking.
“Nick?” Tao’s voice cut through the haze. He gritted out a response, “mmm….”
Tao was watching his seat mate with mounting worry. He looked positively green. He was sweaty and his breathing was weird, “nick are you going to be sick?” His eyes widened as he saw Nick nod his head slightly, “yeah….” He stammered out, “I think I might be…..”
Tao wasted no time unbuckling his seat and squeezing past Nick to get to where mr Farouk and mr Ajayi were sitting, deep in conversation. “Sir?” He asked, holding onto the seat as the coach wobbled along the road. “ Tao! Get back in your seat!” Barked mr Farouk, looking horrified at the thought of a student unbuckled.
“I think Nick is gonna be sick.” He said quickly,before mr Farouk had a chance to yell at him again. They all turned to look at Nick, who even from that distance away looked a greyish green colour. Mr Ajayi leant forwards to the driver, “can we pull over at the next available point? One of the students isn’t feeling too well.” The driver nodded, “yeah, there’s a parking stop just up ahead. Won’t be a tick.”
Mt Farouk unbuckled his seatbelt and followed Tao back up the coach to where Nick was sitting. The movement had caught the attention of the other students who were looking curiously to see what was happening.
“Mr Nelson, feeling a bit sick?” Nick was breathing into the sick bag, he didn’t dare take it away from his face. He nodded and gritted out, “mmm….” In response. “Coach is going to pull over so you can get some air ok?” Nick felt relief coarsing through him. He was getting off the damn coach. He nodded gratefully. Mr Farouk stood alongside him until the coach came to a stop, then ushered him off the coach quickly. Everyone started whispering and muttering.
“Why have we stopped?” Imogen shouted from the back, “ this doesn’t look like Paris?” She scrunched her nose in confusion.
“Nelson is about to barf,”yelled Harry with a laugh.
“Oh shut up Harry,” Elle replied, “people can’t help getting travel sick.”
Charlie had watched Nick almost run off the coach. His heart sank. He didn’t know Nick got car sick. That was why he was acting so weird at the service station. He desperately wanted to go and check on him to see if he was ok. But he couldn’t do that without drawing attention to himself. He glanced out the window to see if he could spot him, eyes widening as he realised Nick was standing with Tao who was awkwardly patting him on the back. Isaac leaned over him to see out the window too,
“Wow.” He said, “I never thought I’d see the day…”

Outside Nick was taking gulps of relatively fresh air. His stomach was instantly settled by getting off the coach. He had his eyes closed but was aware of someone standing nearby. He cracked one eye open and was surprised to see Tao hovering next to him.
“I’m sorry,” he said between deep breaths.
“What for? You didn’t actually throw up on me. So it’s all good. You should have said you get car sick.”
“Yeah, sorry.” Nick repeated, then chuckled at Tao’s expression, “it’s a bit embarrassing….” He added.
Tao scoffed, “ it really isn’t, loads of people get car sick. I get sick on rollercoasters.”
He patted Nick on the back. “Do you feel any better?”
Nick nodded. His face was no longer green. “ yeah, much better, thanks for getting them to stop the coach.”
Tao gave him a small smile before turning to get back on the coach. As he went to sit down, Charlie immediately got out of his seat to speak to him. “Is he ok?” He asked worriedly.
“Yeah, he didn’t barf, just felt sick.” Tao sat down with a thud.
“ thanks for helping him Tao,” Charlie gave him a smile. “I’m glad he had you with him.”
Tao gave him a half smile, “yeah well…..” he paused, “couldn’t have you moaning at me for letting him suffer alone could I!”
Charlie grinned, then turned as he saw Nick and Mr Farouk getting back on the coach. Nick didn’t take his seat next to Tao, but instead took one of the front row ones, leaving mr Farouk and mr Ajayi to sit together on the other side. They both looked fairly happy about the new seating arrangements.
Nick kept his eyes on the road for the remainder of the journey, enjoying watching the skyline of Paris appearing in front of him. He still clutched his sick bag in his hand, but now he had a clear view of the road, he felt a lot better.
Eventually the coach pulled over on a side street in Paris and they all clambered off the coach. Charlie was by Nicks side quickly, “hey you ok?” He said quietly.
Nick gave him a sheepish smile, “yeah I’m fine now.” He rubbed the back of his neck, “I probably should have told someone I get travel sick….” He added.
“Yes you should,” Charlie swatted him playfully on the arm. “But we are here now! Our adventure in Paris. Let’s go find our room.”
Nick smiled, following Charlie to collect his bag. He was definitely an idiot for keeping it to himself. He glanced at Tao who gave him the smallest of smiles. He beamed back . Maybe Tao didn’t hate him after all.

Chapter Text

Sarah hugged her dressing gown around herself as she walked down the stairs, wincing as she heard a hacking cough coming from Nick’s bedroom.  That didn’t sound good.  She had heard her youngest coughing throughout most of the night, but now it just sounded like a harsh bark. He was definitely sporting some sort of cold or flu.  She made her way into the kitchen, turning the kettle on to boil and checking the kitchen cupboards to ensure she was fully stocked on cold and flu tablets and lemsips.  By the sound of that coughing. Nicky was definitely going to need them.  

Nick knew as soon as his eyes opened this morning that he was getting sick.  The rawness in his throat, the dull headache, the congestion and the fever/chills running through his body.  He had no time for sickness though. Not with exam season looming around again and Rugby. The practices were intense this week. They had a match on Saturday morning again St John’s. So there was absolutely zero time for illness.    Nick peeled himself out of his bed, instantly regretting it as he shivered, pulling himself in to a sitting position and running his fingers through his matted hair. Nothing a shower wouldn’t cure. He would feel tight as rain right after.    Nick showered and brushed his teeth. He styled his hair the way he normally did and caught a glimpse of himself in the bathroom mirror. His pale skin and dark eye bags were going to be difficult to disguise from Sarah.  He knew that the very second his mother got an incline that he wasn’t feeling very well, she would instantly put her foot down.  No school. No Rugby and most importantly No Charlie cuddles.   He sniffled. The steam from the shower had helped ease the congestion a little and his chest didn’t feel just as heavy as it had when he had woken up.  He just had to get through breakfast without Sarah becoming suspicious or better yet avoid seeing her all together. If she didn’t seem him then she couldn’t place his under house arrest.  Perfect.   He shuffled in to his room with a towel around his waist and quickly threw up on his school uniform. He debated whether or not put on his blazer.  He was chilly but it was also the may and the start of the good springtime weather. In the end he decided to put in on as well as his coat on top. He may get some judgey looks but at least he’d be warm-ish.   He shoved his revision notes in to his backpack before rushing down the stairs and slipping in to his shoes. He gave Nellie a quick pat as she was waiting for him at the bottom of the stairs, like he did every morning.   “Nicky? Breakfast is ready, darling.”    Nick grimaced. He felt bad as he was just about to rush out the door but he knew the moment his mother set eyes on him that she would demand he stay home from school and he just couldn’t afford to do that.  Not this week.     “I’ll get something on the way Mum, I’m meeting Charlie..” Nick replied in a hoarse voice despite his best attempt at disguising it.    “Nick, I can drop you off at the bus stop. You need to eat breakfast…”. Sarah called from the kitchen. Nick heard the clattering of mugs and sighed. He hated lying to his mum.   “I’m running late mum. I’ll see you later.” He called before rushing out of the door before she had a chance to stop him. He could faintly hear his full name being spoke as the door clicked shut.  He’d deal with the wrath later.   He slung his back over his shoulder and begun the walk to school.  

By the time Nick arrived at the school gates. He was panting heavily.  The walk to school never usually took it out of him like this.  He leaned against the wall trying to compose himself. The ache in his chest from earlier had returned and intensified. His throat was burning and he felt a little lightheaded. He just needed a minute.  “Nick? You Ok?” Charlie’s voice sounded. He had spotted his boyfriend leaning against the wall as he was getting off the bus.  In getting a closer look, he noticed the thin layer of sweat on Nick’s forehead, his pale skin, rosy cheeks and glassy eyes. He didn’t look well.   “Hi.” Nick smiled out, he sounded breathless.   “Hi..” Charlie replied, although he couldn’t hide his concern.  “Are you feeling ok?” He asked curiously.    Nick glanced at his boyfriend and forced a smiled. “Yeah I just walked too fast.” Nick lied.  Charlie frowned, unconvinced. Nick looked sweaty and shivery at the same time.  His frown deepened in seeing Nick bundled up in his jacket even though the sun was splitting the tree’s.  He reached out his knuckles against Nick’s cheek.  He felt warm.   “You’re a bit hot..’  Charlie replied dragging his knuckles up and brushing them against Nick’s forehead.  Nick pulled back, shooting him a smirk. “Charles Spring! Flirting in the playground are we??”  He teased.      Charlie rolled his eyes giving him a playful shove but then glancing at him again with evident concern on his face.  “You know what I mean..”  He sighed. “I think you might be running a temperature..”   “I’m not. I am fine, I swear.”  Nick said quickly. His voice sounding far from fine.   “Maybe you should go to the nurse?”  Charlie suggested.  If nick was poorly then he shouldn’t be at school.  He should be at home resting in bed.  He was being stubborn.    Nick shook his head.  “There’s no need.” He said before being cut off by a cough.  Charlie raised his eyebrow. Nick coughed in to his elbow a few more times and sighed.  “It’s just a little cold.”  He said.  “I am ok, honestly…”.  Charlie wasn’t convinced, not even in the slightest but he knew there was no way Nick was going to sacrifice Rugby practice, especially not with such a big game coming up. “Please promise me that if you feel any worse you will either go to the nurse or call your mum to take you home?” Charlie bargained.  Nick thought for a moment before nodding. There was no way he was doing either  

Nick had hardly made it through form without coughing up a lung, earning himself an unimpressed look from Mr Lange. So, he didn’t really know hoe he was planning on surving the full day at school and then rugby in the afternoon.  Maybe he should have told Sarah how he was feeling after all. No! He couldn’t think like that. He couldn’t let the team down. He was the captain after all.  Rugby captains don’t get sick. The bell sounded to signal the end of form and Nick groaned loudly. That only meant one thing. Double maths.  He hated it on the best of days let alone when he was feeling absolutely shit.   “Here.”  Charlie reached in to his school bag and pulled out a sleeve of throat lozenges.  He had them in there from when he had a really sore throat a few weeks ago.   Nick gratefully took them but didn’t say anything. He wasn’t going to admit that he was feeling unwell because then Charlie would never let him live it down. Hopefully the throat sweeties would help numb the burning pain he felt every time he swallowed.  He just didn’t feel well at all.  His head was pounding. His ears felt a little blocked and achey and his nose had been running like a tap ever since he had opened his eyes this morning.  “See you at lunch?”  Charle smiled, giving his hand.a little. Squeeze.  Nick smiled and nodded although the very thought of food made him want to throw up last nights dinner.    Charlie shot his boyfriend one more concerned look before heading odd in the opposite section, towards the English department.  Hell.  The only way to describe double maths followed by Physics.  Lunchtime finally came around after what seemed like forever.  He had done it. He had made it through most of the day.  He just had to endure two more lessons and then it would be rugby time.  He had been happy with that prospect earlier on but now the very thought of it just made him want to cry.  He couldn’t think of anything worse than running about a rugby field. Being thrown to the ground and probably having a ball bounced off his head.  His muscles had started aching during third period and his headache had intensified.  He felt like he needed to lie down to stop his surroundings spinning around him.  He slowly made it to the art block. Where he and Charlie had agreed to have lunch.  He wasn’t hungry, but he had agreed to meet Charlie there. He stepped inside, spotting Charlie at one of the tables in the back of the room. Talking to Mr Ajayi.  Charlie smiled when he saw his boyfriend but his smile faltered as soon as he seen that Nick looked 10 times worse than he had this morning. Even mr Ajayi noticed.  “You feeling okay Nick?” He asked. The student didn’t look too good.   “I’m fine, sir..” Nick replied hoarsely, giving him a small smile.  Mr Ajayi didn’t look convinced.   “Honestly sir, I just stayed up too late reviving last night.” He lied.  Mr Ajayi glanced at him again before humming to himself, not fully satisfied with the students answer.  “No crumbs you two..” he said before turning to leave the room.   

Nick flopped down in the seat across from Charlie and let out a groan before putting his head on the table.   “Nick?” Charlie asked, his voice of concern.  “Nick? What’s wrong?” He asked against when Nick failed to answer him.  Slowly, Nick lifted his head from the table, his eyes were glassy and swimming with fever.  “Still feeling poorly?” Charlie asked moved his chair around the table so he was sitting next to Nick.   “No.” The older boy croaked out stubbornly.  “Nick…” Charlie replied, fixing him a stern look as he lifted his head off the table.  “Will you just admit that you’re sick??”   “I’m not sick…” Nick replied stubbornly just as he sneezed into his elbow, causing him to groan because the action hurt his already sore throat, he flopped his head back down on the table, letting out another moan.   “Yeah you’re the picture of health.” Charlie replied sarcastically.  “You should be at home. In bed..”   “I told you. It’s just a cold.” Nick mumbled, his voice muffled as he refused to lift his head up.  “Go to the nurse.” Charlie said as he unwrapped his sandwich.  “No…” Nick whined.  “Nick..”  Nick lifted his head again. “If I go to the nurse. She’ll send me home. I can’t miss rugby..”  “You’re allowed to be unwell, Nick.”  “No.” Nick replied firmly.  “I’m not going…”  Charlie sighed. He had half a mind to call Sarah Nelson himself and tell her just how stubborn her son was being as he had an obvious disregard for his own health but that would be going behind Nick’s back. Betraying him. He couldn’t. “Fine.” He said taking a bite of his sandwich. He glanced at his boyfriend. “You’ll promise to tell me if you feel worse??”   Nick looked at him with glassy eyes and nodded. “I promise.” He said his voice sounded stuffy and congested. He then put his head down again. Maybe a little lunchtime nap would help?  

*time skip* 

Nick trudged up the driveway with his school bag slung over his shoulders. He coughed into his elbow. Wincing. He just wanted to crawl in to bed. He was exhausted and shivery. His head was pounding. His chest sore and achey and his throat raw. Everytime he spoke or swallowed feeling like he was swallowing razor blades. The worst thing was it was only half past 3.  Coach Singh had took one look at him and forbid him from playing rugby, she had also chastised him for being an idiot and turning up to school in his condition in the first place. She’d insisted on calling Sarah to collect him but Nick being Nick and giving how stubborn he could be had insisted that he’d walk home and that the fresh air may do him some good. Boy was he wrong. He felt worse. Every step felt like it was taking everything out of him. Coach Singh had called Sarah and explained how poorly Nick had appeared and that he was on his way him.  Nick lifted his head and sighed as he could see his mum standing at the living room window watching for his arrival home. She didn’t look very impressed as she stood with a hand on her hip. He remembered back to this morning and sighed. He strode up to the front door he could hear Nellie’s barking on the other side as she scratched the door from the Inside trying to get to him. He took a deep breath before opening the door. Ready to face the wrath. If that meant he could crawl under his duvet and sleep for days. He’d take it.   He stepped through the front door with a sigh. Toeing his shoes off he dropped his bag onto the floor. God he felt rough. He glanced at his face in the hallway mirror. He did not look good. His eyes were shining, his nose red. He had dark circles under his eyes and a sheen of sweat across his forehead, hair damp and sweaty. He sighed, which caused him to cough. He tried to stifle it, but it was no use. He coughed and coughed and coughed, hand on his chest to try to dull the pain. He became aware of a pair of eyes on him and as his coughing fit finally let up he looked up to come face to face with a stern looking Sarah Nelson. “Nicholas Luke Nelson!” He winced at her tone, “what on earth were you thinking going to school in this condition!” He gave her a sheepish look, wincing as he swallowed. “Sorry mum,” he rasped, “I thought I’d be ok once I got to school.” 

She folded her arms across her chest, “and how did that stubborn streak of yours work out for you today then hmm?” Nick looked down at the floor. He hated disappointing his mum. Looking back it was such a stupid decision to go to school today. Rugby really wasn’t that important. He felt tears spring to his eyes and he blinked them back furiously. He was always emotional when he felt poorly. Sarah’s face softened as she watched her youngest blinking back tears. “Hey, Nicky, come here,” she held out her arms and Nick fell into the hug, “I’m sorry,  “ he said again. 

“It’s ok baby, I’m sorry I snapped at you.” She held him gently as he sniffled in her shoulder. He was such an emotional soul. She loved how he wore his heart on his sleeve. He hated to disappoint her. She carefully pulled out of the hug and examined his face. “Right, you go upstairs and get into bed. I’ll bring up some medicine and tea for you ok?” Nick gave her a small smile and trudged upstairs to his room. His bed was still unmade from the morning, his pjs in a pile on the floor. Nick stripped off his uniform, chucking it on his desk chair and was in his pyjamas and under his duvet in minutes. He lay there shivering. His head hurt, his chest hurt from the coughing fit earlier. He felt really miserable. 

Sarah made a tea and a lemsip for Nick. She buttered a toasted bagel and popped it all on the tray. She also raided the first aid cupboard and added a thermometer, box of tissues and vapour rub to the tray. She carefully carried it all upstairs, knocking gently before entering her son’s room.  “Here we are sweetheart,” she said softly, placing the tray down on the bedside cabinet. Nick shuffled upright in his bed. Sarah placed the digital thermometer in his ear and waited for it to beep. She tutted as she read the result. “38.9, that’s too high.” She handed him the lemsip. “Get that down you, we need to bring your temp down a bit.” Nick sipped it gratefully, letting the hot liquid soothe his sore throat. He let the steam clear his nose. Sarah gently swept his fringe out of his eyes. “You feel really rough huh?” 

Nick nodded. “Yeah,” he said quietly. They sat silently together for a few minutes while Nick finished his lemsip, handing the mug back to his mum. “Eat the bagel baby, I’ll be up to check on you later. Have you got your phone with you?” He nodded, gesturing to where he had abandoned it on the bed next to him. “Ok, call me if you need me, I’ll just be downstairs.” She kissed him on the top of his head and then left him to rest, closing the door quietly behind her. Nick sighed as he took a small bite of the bagel. He usually loved them, but he wasn’t at all hungry. He nibbled a little of one half before giving up as he felt his stomach roll in protest. Instead he picked up his tea and sipped that. A buzz from his phone startled him. He looked at the lit up screen, smiling as he saw it was from Charlie. 

Charlie: hey babe, how do you feel? I went to see you at rugby practise and coach singh said she’d sent you home. 

He replied quickly, tea forgotten on the side.

Nick: i don’t feel too good. Mum was pissed at me for going to school. She’s sent me to bed.

Charlie: her and me both! Want me to come over and keep you company?

Nick hesitated. As much as he wanted nothing more than cuddles from Charlie, he knew his mum wanted him to rest. He didn’t want to pass his germs onto him either. To be honest he just wanted to sleep. 

Nick: it’s ok. I’m just gonna go to sleep I think. 

Charlie: ok. Feel better soon, text me if you get bored!

Nick hearted the message and chucked the phone next to him. He laid back down, closing his eyes. 

******

Sarah sat down at the table nursing a cup of tea. It was half five in the morning, far too early to be up and about. Nick had had a tricky night. He’d been up coughing for the majority of it. At one point he coughed so hard he made himself sick. She’d found him slumped over the toilet, fever still raging as he gagged and coughed. In the end she’d turned on the shower to create steam which had eventually helped to ease his coughs. He’d finally succumbed to sleep at around 4am and she’d sat by his bedside watching his chest rise and fall peacefully. She hoped he’d be improved by the morning or she’d be on the phone to the GP to get him seen to. She let out a loud yawn. Maybe she could grab a couple of hours sleep before he woke again.  

Nick groaned as he came to. His head hurt, his chest was so sore from coughing all night. He could feel cold sweat still clinging to his body. He stretched out slowly, and opened his eyes. The light instantly made things a hundred times worse and he squinted them closed, looking through a tiny crack in his eyelids. He reached blindly for his phone, seeing the time 10.51am. Oh. Guess he was missing school today then, he thought. He saw messages from Charlie, but couldn’t quite bring himself to open them just yet. He chucked his phone back down and sighed, causing his chest to tighten into a cough. He grabbed his water bottle and took a few careful sips, desperately willing the cough to die down a bit to save his aching ribs.  A knock at his door startled him, he squinted over and saw his mum’s anxious face in the doorway. “Hey sweetheart, how are you feeling?” She asked, studying his face carefully. He pulled himself up into a sitting position, “shit,” he said hoarsely. Sarah smiled, “I’ll let the language slip as you are poorly, but no swearing in this house young man,” she joked, coaxing a smile from her youngest. He noticed the tray in her hand, once again laden with medicines, drinks and some dry boring looking food. She popped the thermometer back in his ear, tutting that his temperature was still up. Sarah took some tablets from the tray and handed them to him with a steaming hot cup of tea. “Here you go baby, these will make you feel a bit brighter.” Nick took them gratefully, and enjoyed the soothing feeling of the warm mug in his hands. “I’m glad you managed to get some sleep,” she said, stroking his fringe. “I called in to Truham to say you wouldn’t be in today. I’m staying home too to keep an eye on you.” That made Nick feel guilty. His mum didn’t get many dependency days, and he knew she’d probably had to take it unpaid. “Sorry….” He whispered, causing Sarah to lightly smack his shoulder. “Oh don’t be silly,” she said, “after last night I need a quiet day too. I don’t think either of us got much sleep last night. Work can manage without me for one day.”

Nick took a slice of toast, and gingerly took a small bite. He really wasn’t hungry but he knew his mum would hover if he didn’t eat. “I think I should book you an appointment with the GP,” she declared. Nick shook his head vehemently. “No, no don’t do that. It’s a waste of time. It’s just a cough mum.” He pleaded with her. He hated going to the doctors. They would just say it was a virus and needed time to get better.  Sarah hesitated. Her mum instincts were telling her that he should get checked out but she also was very aware that Nick was fast approaching adulthood. He needed to make these kinds of decisions for himself and she needed to trust him that if he said he was ok, then he was ok. “Fine,” she said finally. “I won’t phone them. But you must promise to rest up ok?” Nick nodded quickly, taking another bite of toast to prove to her that he was fine. Unfortunately the crumbs tickled his throat, setting off another round of coughing. Sarah gently rubbed his back to soothe him until he finally calmed. He took a sip of his tea and then laid back down. “I think I’m gonna sleep,” he mumbled. “Ok baby, I’ll be downstairs if you need anything.”

Charlie was trying hard not to imagine every worst case scenario as he sat on the picnic benches at lunchtime with Tao and Isaac. He hadn’t heard from Nick since he text yesterday to say that he was going to sleep. Charlie had sent him a goodnight text, a good morning text, an are you coming to school text, an ‘I’m glad you are taking the day off’ text and about 5, ‘are you ok’ texts. Not one had been opened. “Maybe I should call Sarah?” He said to Isaac for the third time that lunch. Tao rolled his eyes. “Oh for gods sake Charlie, he’s probably just asleep.” Charlie sighed. “Yeah I know, I’m just worried about him.” Isaac smiled softly. “Why don’t you pop over to check on him after school?” Charlie nodded, “yeah I think I will. Just to be sure he’s ok.”   School felt like it took forever, Charlie clock watched the last lesson and was relieved when the final bell rang. He immediately checked his phone, still nothing from Nick. He quickened his pace out of school and raced to the Nelson house at a light jog. He was out of breath as he finally rang the bell, hopping nervously from one foot to the other as he waited for an answer. 

Finally Sarah opened the door, smiling as she realised who it was, “Charlie darling, how are you?” “Hi Sarah, I’m sorry to come unannounced,” he began, “I just hadn’t heard from Nick and I just wanted to see if he was ok?” Sarah’s heart warmed. He was such a Sweet boy. So good for Nick. “Oh that’s lovely of you, he’s fast asleep. He was coughing  non stop last night so didn’t get a wink of sleep. He’s been nodding off most of the day, he’s still coughing far too much for my liking and his temperature is still up, but he insists he’ll be fine. Has he not texted you at all?” Charlie shook his head, relieved to hear that Nick was ok. “No, but that’s ok….im glad he’s resting. Do you think it would be ok to go up and say hi?” 

Sarah smiled, “I don’t see why not, I’ll pop the kettle on for us all ok?” Charlie nodded gratefully before heading up the stairs to nicks room. The door was ajar so he peeked his head in. Nick was asleep but he didn’t seem to be sleeping very soundly. His breathing was raspy, Charlie was sure he could hear it rattle from the doorway. His face looked flushed and he’d bundled himself under the covers. “Nick?” He whispered, moving slowly towards the bed. He sat down gently beside him and gently stroked his cheek, “Nick?” 

Nicks eyes fluttered open. It took him a moment to register who it was sitting beside him but when he did he smiled, “Char,why aren’t you at school?” He looked at him in confusion. Charlie smiled back, kissing him on his warm forehead. “Schools over babe, you’ve been asleep I think.” Nicks eyes widened. “Shit, I’m sorry, I meant to text you at lunch but I couldn’t face looking at my phone. I’ve been coughing so much, I must have worn myself out and fallen asleep. I didn’t mean to ignore you, I promise…..I’m so sorry….” Charlie put his hand over nicks mouth to stop him speaking. “Oy, enough! You don’t need to say sorry, I’m glad you are ok though I was a little worried.” Nick looked down guiltily, Charlie immediately took his hand. “How do you feel now?” He asked,  Nick sighed, stifling a cough in the process. “Not great,” he admitted. “I can’t stop coughing and my chest really hurts. Feels like I might crack a rib at this rate,” he half joked. Charlie frowned, “have you seen a doctor?” He asked. Nick shrugged, “nah, no point. You know what doctors are like. They’ll just tell me to rest up.”   Charlie wasn’t sure he agreed with that. Nick really didn’t look very well. But he also knew how stubborn his boyfriend was. There was no point arguing with him. “Budge up,” he said, Nick quickly shuffling to the side to create some room. Charlie pulled Nick into a hug, letting him rest his head on his chest. He gently ran his fingers through nicks sweaty hair, trying to to feel alarmed at the rattles coming from his chest as he breathed shallowly in and out.

Sarah popped up with some tea and biscuits, along with more medicine for Nick. Charlie sat with him until he was distracted by his phone buzzing in his pocket. “It’s my my,” he sighed. “ I have to go home. You gonna be ok?” Nick nuzzled into Charlie’s shoulder, “no. I need you to stay and be my pillow,” he half joked. Charlie chuckled before carefully extracting himself from the bed. “I’ll text you later, try and reply if you are awake so I don’t worry,” he smiled. Nick looked guilty, “I will, promise.”  Charlie gave him one last kiss before going back downstairs. Sarah, who was in the living room, looked up as he came through, “you off sweetheart?” “Yeah, mum needs me home.” He sighed. “Well thank you for cheering Nicky up. Do you need a lift?” Charlie smiled, “no im fine thanks. Thanks for having me.” He gathered up his belongings and headed home, his mind still full of worry for Nick. He hoped he was over the worst of it by now.

Night fell and Nick felt even worse than before. He had been coughing non stop for about ten minutes. His eyes were streaming, he could hardly catch his breath, his chest was in so much pain. Sarah was downstairs watching tv when she realised there was noise coming from upstairs. She muted the tv, her heart sinking as she realised it was Nick coughing and coughing and coughing. She raced upstairs to find him huddled in his bed, gasping for breath in between fits of coughing. “Mum,” he croaked out, “I can’t……breathe….properly……” he gasped the words out. Sarah was by his side in an instant. “It’s ok sweetheart, calm down. You need to slow down your breathing,” but Nick was panicking too much to hear her. Sarah realised he was going to pass out if he kept breathing like that. His cough was so nasty, his chest obviously painful. Why didn’t she listen to her own instincts and take him to the doctors earlier on. She could kick herself for ignoring her own judgement. 

“Nick? We need to get you checked out. I’m taking you to urgent care.” 

Nick was finding breathing to be really challenging so didn’t have the energy to argue. He was desperately trying to get control of his breaths and slow down the coughing. It felt like he was breathing through a straw and every time he managed to get some oxygen in it caused him to cough it straight back out again. He felt lightheaded and dizzy with it. He wasn’t really aware of his mum bustling around getting him a hoodie and some socks. He let her guide him to the car as he continued coughing and wheezing. She buckled him in, her eyes wide with fright. She’d never heard him sound  before. She was really worried about him. She googled the nearest urgent care centre and put the address in her maps. “Hold on sweetheart, we are going to get you help.”

Sarah drove to the urgent care clinic in record time, probably breaking umpteen speed limits on the way but she didn’t care about that right now. Nick was really sick. She had to get him help.  Oh why hadn’t she listened to her maternal instincts earlier.    Sarah parked the car in one of the bays, not even bothering to straighten up.  Nicky’s breathing had gotten worse during the drive. He was wheezing pretty hard, every time he coughed. He groaned in pain. His cough was wet and chesty sounding. He just looked and sounded so unwell.  “We’re here baby.” She announced as she unclipped her own seatbelt before reaching over to the passenger seat and unclipping his.   “Come on darling.” She said as she opened her door and walked around the other side to help Nick out of the car. 

Sarah should have known it would be busy. It was Friday evening. The waiting room was packed. Loud and busy. Nick’s worst nightmare.  She studied the busy waiting area as they made their way over to the reception desk. She had her arm linked in between Nick’s, he’d stop and cough in to his elbow every now and then, earning a glare from an elderly women. Sarah retaliated by giving her a dirty look that said ‘mind your own business’ before guiding her son towards the desk.  She could tell at first glance that the majority of the people that were waiting were either hypochondriacs or time wasters and did not require urgent care. It was Friday night. The clinic was full of people that had one too many drinks already or minor injuries. She hoped that this didn’t interfere with Nicky getting seen to.  

The receptionist gave them a tired smile. It had evidently been a busy day and a long shift. Sarah didn’t envy her at all.  “Can I help?”   Sarah returned the smile as she gripped on to Nick’s arm. He looked like he was going to keel over any minute now.   “HI, yes. My son’s unwell. I…I think he may have a chest infection..”  the receptionist flashed them a sympathetic look without looking up from her computer screen. She typed something on her keyboard.  “Full name and date of birth?” She asked.  “Nicholas Luke Nelson. 4th September 2006…” Sarah rhymed off as she watched the receptionist type away. “It’s very busy this evening…I’m afraid it might be a bit of a wait.” She apologised.  Sarah shook her head quickly. That wasn’t good enough. Anyone could see that Nick needed to see a doctor.   “Can’t you get him seen a bit quicker?” She asked desperately.  “He’s having some trouble breathing.”    “I’m sorry. We are doing the best we can to ensure everyone is seen too quickly.”  Sarah just scoffed. She knew it wasn’t the receptionists fault. She was just doing her job, but it felt unfair that Nicky was expected to wait in a busy waiting room when he was ovbiously poorly when the drunken idiot with a black eye and bruised knuckles two rows back would probably been seen to and treated to first.   “Come on darling, let’s sit you down.” She soothed as she guided Nick over to a row of chairs in the back of the room. Nick wasted no time in curling up along them, his head in Sarah’s lap as she ran her fingers through his damp hair. His cough had Intensified. Every couple of minutes he would let out a harsh bark of a cough. Sarah could actually feel his chest rattling as he leaned in to her.  Sarah wished she had brought a blanket from home as she saw him shivering. She’d never anticipated that they’d need to wait this long. 10 minutes turning in to half an hour. So much for urgent care?  “Shouldn’t be too long now, sweetheart..” she said softly.  She hoped not. This was ridiculous. 

Nick felt awful. His chest felt like it was on fire, every breath he took caused his pain. Every cough caused him to wheeze. Breathing was becoming more and more difficult. He felt tired, hot and cold at the same time.  The noise of the busy waiting room was doing his head in. He just wanted to go home and get back in to bed but he knew his mum was right. She was ways right. He knew he probably needed antibiotics or something if he wanted to feel better. He just hated how long it was taking. He hated urgent care.  Nick coughed. It hurt like hell. His eyes widened as he realised he wasn’t getting enough air. He coughed again, but it came out more like a forced wheeze.  He pulled himself in to a sitting position, grabbing hold of his chest as he tried to take deep breaths. He let out a choked, strangled breath. His eyes wide with panic.  Sarah’s eyes flew opened as she heard the strangled sound.  “Nicky? Baby?”  She got to her feet immediately. Nick coughed and coughed. His chest was hurting so bad and he felt so breathless. The commotion had alerted the receptionist who rushed over with a cup of water.  Nick’s hand shook has he brought the cup to his lips, hoping that the liquid would help subside the coughing. It didn’t help much. The receptionist took one look at Nick and gasped. She immediately paged for a doctor.   “We’ll get him in with the doctor, next.” She assured Sarah, who was rubbing soothing circles on her son’s back as he coughed and groaned. He wasn’t well at all.  

The receptionist kept true to her word and Nick was whisked straight in to the next available examining room. The doctor, a middle aged man shook Sarah’s hand and motioned for Nick to sit up on the examination table. Which he did. The doctor firstly took his temperature, not to Sarah’s surprise she discovered his fever had spiked from earlier.   “Temperatures a little on the high side.” He spoke as he popped the ear thermometer on the side and then proceeded to secure a blood pressure cuff on Nick’s arm.  He did a few more checks including looking in Nick’s ears, and down his throat before removing the stethoscope from around his neck.  “I don’t like the sound of that chest.”  He said as he asked Nick to lay back and lift up his pyjama top, in which he did, exhaustedly.   He grimaced as the cold instrument touched his skin and tried his best to follow the doctors instructions. Breath in and breath out slowly.  It hurt like hell.  He exhaled but ended up double over into a coughing fit.  “Oh Nicky.” Sarah sighed, wincing at the harsh coughing as she held out and squeezed his arm. He was so poorly.   “Let’s try that again.” The doctor said as he rubbed the metal side of the stethoscope and placed it against Nick’s chest. Trying to get a good listen to the teenagers lungs.  Nick tried to take a deep breath, he only managed to exhale half way before falling into another fit of coughing, each one sounding raspy and chesty. The doctor put the stethoscope back around his neck, confidently ready to diagnose his patient. “Sounds like a nasty chest infection..” he said.  “I’m presuming a nasty case of bronchitis, but by the sounds of those lungs it sounds like it’s progressed to mild pneumonia.”   Sarah gasped. That sounded serious.   “You did the right thing in bringing him in, left untreated these kind of infections can go downhill pretty quickly.” The doctor said as he pulled out a prescription pad and started scribbling down.  “He doesn’t need to be hospitalised, does he?” Sarah asked, not missing the flash of fear in her son’s eyes. The doctor gave them a small smile and shook his head.  “That’s not necessary.” He assured them, watching as the relief flooded over Nick.   “However I am prescribing him with a strong course of antibiotics to fight the infection and a steroid inhaler and I recommend complete bedrest.” The doctor instructed as he handed the prescription over to Sarah. “Just normal paracetamol and ibuprofen to help with the fever and pain. Steam is quite good for cleaning the airway and lifting any mucus. Or a humidifier if you have one at home.”  Sarah nodded, taking it all the information.  “If his breathing gets any worse…don’t hesitate to head up to A&E, but hopefully the antibiotics and steroids will begin to help ease the symptoms..”   “Thank you.” Sarah smiled gratefully, helping Nick redress in his hoodie.   “That’s quite alright.” The doctor smiled.  “Hope you feel better soon, Nicholas.” He smiled. “You won’t want to be off the rugby pitch for too long.”   Nick raised his eyebrow.  “How’d you know that I play rugby?” He asked, curiously and hoarsely.   “My son Noah is on the team..” the doctor smiled.  “I don’t get to many games with my jobs but I recognise you from some of the ones I’ve been to. Team captain, right?”   Nick smiled and nodded. “Yeah.”  Sarah watched with pride, Nick always looked so genuinely happy when he spoke about rugby.   She thanked the doctor again before guiding him Nick out of the room and back towards the car.  

Sarah made a quick stop off at Asda to pick up Nick’s prescription from the chemist. She also picked up some sick day essentials including Nick’s favourite soup, some more tissues and Lemsips and more paracetamol and ibuprofen as well as some of Nick’s favourite snacks for when he was feeling a little better. She couldn’t resist herself in picking him up some new pyjamas. There was nothing better than cozy new pyjamas when you weren’t feeling well. Satisfied with her purchases she promptly made he easy to checkout, not wanting to leave Nicky alone in the car for too long. 

Nick rested his head against the window of the car. He felt awful. Trust him to have more than just a cold. He couldn’t just pop a few cold and flu tablets and be on the mend, no he had to have a weeks course of antibiotics and a bloody inhaler. Fantastic. He closed his eyes as he felt the relieve of the cool glass against his fevered skin.  He just wanted to curl up in bed with Nellie cuddled and Charlie cuddles. His eyes flew open. Charlie. He hadn’t responded to Charlie’s messages from earlier. He knew what a worrier his boyfriend was as well.  He Scurried around trying to locate his phone, he checked the glove compartment, the foot well and his hoodie pocket and then sighed heavily, remembering that he had left his phone on his bed.  He needed to message Charlie as soon as they got home, but right now, he jut needed to close his eyes for 5 minutes. He felt so so sleepy. He relaxed against the cool window again, allowing his eyes to close. 

“Nicky? Wake up, sweetheart..”  Sarah announced as she pulled in to their front driveway. “We’re home.”  She said as she stopped the car and glanced at her son, sleeping soundly, his head pressed up against the window.  She was glad he seemed to be getting some rest, but that couldn’t be comfy. He would feel much better tucked up in his bed.     Nick blinked his eyes open and let out a little groan.  “I know you want to sleep, baby.” Sarah said softly, grabbing Nick’s prescription and her shopping from the back of the car and opening the passenger door. “Let’s get you inside.”  Nick forced himself on to his feet and followed his mum up to the front door.  Nellie bounced up on to his legs as soon as he walked through the door. She could sense her brother wasn’t feeling well.   “How about I run you a quick hot bath?  I can freshen up your sheets…”Sarah suggested. She knew Nick just wanted to curl up in bed but the steam from the bath might help him feel a little better and release some of the pressure in his chest. It would also give her a chance to strip his sweaty sheets and replace them with fresh ones.   “Ok…” Nick mumbled tiredly as he held on to the bannister. He felt too exhausted to protest or argue.   Sarah ran a shallow hot bath and mixed in some Epsom salts before folding a towel over the radiator and leaving Nick to it.  She stripped his bed sheets, put on fresh ones and left his new pyjamas on the bed before going downstairs. She then opened a tin of soup and put it on a low heat on the stove. She knew Nick wasn’t hungry but if she could get him to at least try and eat a few spoonfuls then she would be happy.  She made him a Lemsip and poured out a glass of orange juice before setting everything on a tray, along with Nick’s antibiotics, some paracetamol and the inhaler whilst waiting for the soup to heat up.   10 minutes later she heard footsteps up above her.  Nick must be out of the bath. She decided to wait a few moments to give him time to get sorted.  

Nick dried off with a towel and smiled as he spotted the new pyjamas lay out on his fresh bed. His mum was an absolute angel. It wasn’t much. A light grey top and flannel bottoms but there was just something comforting about new Pjs when you’re poorly.  Nick wasted no time in pulling back the duvet and climbing under the covers. He hadn’t bothered washing his hair because frankly he couldn’t be bothered, but also sitting around with damp hair when he already had borderline pneumonia wasn’t exactly a good idea and the thought and effort of blow drying his hair wasn’t the one. The first thing Nick did was reach for his phone which he had earlier abandoned.  He wasn’t surprised to see his Home Screen light up with numerous notifications. The majority of them from Charlie.  

Charlie - (21:00) How are you feeling? Did you manage to get some sleep after I left? 

Charlie - (21:01) Mum was pissed that I didn’t come straight home from school😳 

Charlie - (21:02) Although she did lighten up a little when I told her that you’re sick. Tori says feel better soon 

Charlie - (21:07) are you awake? 

Charlie - (21:10) I am assuming by the lack of response that you are probably sleeping?😴 sleep is the best thing. Hope you feel better in the morning and I can come engulf you with cuddles

{Paris Squad Chat}

Darcy- (21:22) What time are we all meeting tomorrow?

Tao - (21:23) I can’t believe I have let you all convince me that spending my Saturday morning watching rugby players tumble around a muddy field is a good idea🫩

Issac - (21:24) you love it really Tao

Elle - (21:24) Oh come on Tao!! You promised Nick you’d be there to support him

Elle - (21:24) and Charlie too! Who knows he might even get off reserve for once🙌🏼

Tao - (21:25) I’ll still be there.  Just don’t expect me to be happy about it. 

Issac - (21:25) 😅😅😅

Tara - (21:26) You’ve got this Nick!! 🏈

Darcy - (21:27)Yes Nicholas!! Tomorrow might be the day Truham finally kick St John’s a$$👍🏼

Sahar - (21:27) Let’s go Truham!!!

Imogen - (21:28)What’s everyone wearing?👀

Sahar - (21:28) Oh Imogen 🤣

Charlie - (21:30) Hey guys! Got some bad news…Nick won’t be playing tomorrow

Darcy - (21:30) WHAT???? 

Tao - (21:31) Explain yourself Nelson! 

Tara - (21:31) Why??? 

Elle - (21:31) Omg why??? There’s no way Nick would miss such a big game? 

Charlie - (21:32) Nick’s poorly🤒

Elle - (21:32) Oh no. That sucks. 

Tao - (21:32) Ah so he really is sick then? I thought you were just overeating earlier

Tara: - (21:33) What’s Wong? 

Darcy - (21:33) Man up Nicholas! You have a game to win!🏈

Tara - (21:34) DARCY!!  

Charlie- (21:36) I think it’s the flu or something. His chest sounded really bad earlier😭 

Sahar - (21:37) Chest infection??? 

Charlie - (21:38) I hope not😩 but he’s definitely in no shape to play tomorrow! 

Darcy - (21:38) I feel bad now. Sorry Nicholas❤️

Tao - (21:39) Wait….

Elle - (21:39) What??? 

Issac - (21:39) Oh that is rubbish. Hope you feel better soon Nick 🫶🏼

Tara - (21:39) ??? Tao?? 

Tao - (21:40) Charlie is the reserve…

Charlie - (21:40) so???  

Elle - (21:40) Oh yeah…never thought of that! 

Issac - (21:41) I am so confused. What is going on?? 

Tao - (21:41). Charlie is the reserve. Nick is sick, so can’t play. Truham will be down a player… 

Tara - (21:42) ah I get it

Charlie - (21:43) Oh shit!!!🙅🏻‍♂️ I am going to die 

Tao - (21:43) 😅😅😅

Elle - (21:43) you’ll be great Charlie❤️

Tara - (21:44) Elle is right Charlie. You’ll be fine and we will all be there to cheer you on! 

Darcy - (21:45) GO CHARLIE!! 

Nick flopped back against the pillows after reading all his messages. He’d never thought about that until now. Charlie was going to have to play in his place tomorrow. Maybe he’d feel better in the morning and he convince his mum and coach Singh that he was well enough to play? No, that wasn’t going to happen.  Besides, he was already skating on thin ice with his mum. She’d be furious with him if he even suggested playing in his state. Charlie would be fine. He’s watched enough games as reserve to know the rules. Nick’s train of thoughts were interrupted by a light tapping on his door.  Sarah peered her head around the door, glad to see Nick was changed and in bed. She carried the tray over to his bedside table and perched on the edge of the bed.  “How are you feeling, darling?” She asked, resting the back of her hand against his forehead and wincing at the head she felt there.  “Horrible.” Nick croaked out, sinking into the pillows. Sarah sighed as she reached out for the thermometer on the bedside table. She pressed the on button and slipped the device in to her son’s ear before he had the chance to protest. The thermometer beeped after a few moments. Sarah frowned at the reading. Nick’s fever was still far too high for her liking. She picked up the antibiotics and popped two of the capsules out and handed them over to Nick to take with a sip of orange juice. 2 tablets, 3 times a day for 7 days. Nick was less than impressed but he swallowed them down, chasing them with a gulp of orange squash. He coughed a few times and groaned. Sarah winced. It sounded really painful. She had handed the pamphlet that had come with the inhaler whilst Nick was in the bed.  He was to take a few puffs in the mornings and evenings whilst he was feeling poorly and any other times that he was struggling to catch his breath. He wasn’t asthmatic but his lungs were compromised at the minute due to the infection. So it was precautionary.  Nick raised his eye and glared at her. He was less than impressed.  “You heard what the doctor said, Nicky.” Sarah said handing the inhaler over.  “It will help.”  Nick sighed. He didn’t really have a choice over this. He brought the tip of the inhaler to his lips, he pressed down on the pump, jumping a little as the mist filled his lungs. It felt weird. He didn’t envy asthmatics at all but if it stopped him wheezing like someone who had smoked eighty cigarettes a day for years until he was over this chest infection then so be it. He took another puff and chucked the inhaler down on the bed. Sarah chucked at her son’s actions.  “I made you some soup.” She told him causing him to grimace and pull a face.  “I know you’re not hungry, but can you at least try a few spoonfuls for me?”   

Nick glanced at his mum. He knew she wouldn’t leave him alone to sleep unless he had at least tried a little bit. He let out a chesty sigh before picking up the spoon. He slurped a few spoonfuls. It actually tasted really nice, he just had zero appetite. He managed about six sooonfuls before pushing the bowl away. Sarah took the hint as she lifted the bowl back on to the tray. “Good job, baby.” She smiled stroking his hair. Nick coughed. He just sounded so congested and bunged up, an idea struck.  “Be right back, sweetie.” She announced as she left the room and headed towards the storage cupboard in the upstairs hallway. She rummaged around, smiling to herself when she finally found what she was looking for. She closed the door to cupboard and returned to Nick’s bedroom. Chuckling as she seen her son roll his eyes upon her return as she was carrying a steam humidifier.    “You’ll be thanking me later, Nicky…” she told him as she set it down on the other side of Nick’s bed. She then went to grab a jug of water to fill the humidifier up before switching it on. It didn’t take long for it to start producing steam.  “Drink your Lemsip baby, it will help bring your temperature down.”   Nick hoisted himself in to a sitting position and grabbed the mug of lukewarm liquid, bringing it to his lips. Blackcurrant. His favourite. He sipped the warm liquid, feeling instant relief. Sarah grabbed a thin throw blanket from the bottom of Nick’s bed and draped it over tucking it in at the edges. Nick finished his drink and Sarah placed the empty mug back on the tray. She left the inhaler, thermometer and orange juice on the bedside table before packing everything else up.  Nick settled against the pillows, grabbing his phone from the side.   “You need to rest, Nick.” Sarah said giving her best ‘mum face’ and reaching to take the phone.  Nick tried to hold it out of her reach.  “Nicholas!” Sarah said sternly.  “You’re sick you need to sleep. Not sit glued to your phone all night…”  “I know.” Nick replied. “I will, I promise…just after I text Charlie back.” Nick reasoned.  “He will just worry if I don’t..”.  Sarah’s face softened a little bit. “5 minutes and then I’m taking your phone downstairs, ok?”  She said. She wasn’t usually a strict parent but Nick needed sleep.  She wasn’t prepared to risk him getting worse because that would probably just end up in a hospital stay and she knew neither of them wanted that.  Nick nodded and watched as she left the room.  He then brought up his messages with Charlie. 

Nick - (22:46). I’m so so sorry Charlie. Mum made me go to the urgent care clinic and I forgot to to take my phone with me. I didn’t mean to worry you ❤️ sorry. 

Nick - (22:47) Sorry if I wake you up. I just wanted to let you know I’m okay-ish 

Charlie - (22:48) that is one S word too many Nicholas

Nick - (22:48) 🤣🤣🤣sorry 

Charlie - (22:49) NICK!!! 

Charlie - (22:50) How did you get on at urgent care? Are you feeling any better? 

Nick - (22:51) No not really😢 I feel worse if that’s even possible. Doctor says it’s a chest infection caused by bronchitis or something like that.  Said I’m lucky that mum dragged me there or it might’ve developed in to pneumonia…

Charlie - (22:52) Nick….that’s pretty serious. 

Nick - (22:53) could be worse I guess. I feel like shit though🤒

Charlie - (22:53) No wonder😭 I hope they gave you something to help. 

Nick - (22:54) yeah…antibiotics and a bloody inhaler

Charlie - (22:55) Jeeez. Must be bad. Hopefully those help though

Nick - (22:56) you’ll never guess who my doctor was… 

Charlie - (22:56) whoooo??👀

Nick - (22:57) his son goes to Truham and is in my year 

Charlie - (22:58) Nick, that could be anyone you dork 🤣

Nick - (22:59) Noah Ferguson’s dad

Charlie - (23:00) I didn’t know he was a doctor 🤔

Nick - (23:01) Neither did I.  I’m so sorry that you’ll probably have to play tomorrow, char. 

Charlie - (23:02) Nick you can’t help being unwell. Besides we both knew I wasn’t going to stay on reserve forever. I’m kind of excited to play St John’s again…

Nick - (23:03) just be careful please❤️

Charlie - (23:04) look at it this way, I’ve I get injured. We can be matching invalids🤕

Nick - (23:05) not even funny, Char 

Charlie - (23:06) what if I promise to come see you after the game? 

Nick - (23:06) for cuddles?

Charlie - (23:06) for cuddles 🥰 

Nick - (23:06) I can’t wait 🥳

Nick - (23:07) I better go before my mum confiscates my phone🤣

Charlie - (23:08) you need rest, Nick❤️

Nick - (23:08) you sound just like her

Charlie - (23:09) what a compliment!! Sarah Nelson is a legend😅

Nick - (23:10) 🤣🤣🤣 going to sleep now😴

Charlie - (23:11) Good! See you tomorrow❤️ love you! 

Nick- (23:11) love you❤️

Nick smiled softly to himself as he put his phone down on his chest and stifled a yawn. He hadn’t realised he was so tired until now. He closed his eyes and allowed himself to drift off in to a well needed slumber.  

Sarah finished cleaning up the kitchen and folding some washing until she caught a glance at the kitchen clock. It had been well more than five minutes since she had left Nick’s room and she knew what her son was like. He would sit up all night texting with Charlie if she allowed it. She out her washcloth down and climbed the stairs.  

“Nicholas Luke Nelson-“ she spoke in an authoritative voice about to chastise him for still being on as she entered his room, quickly softening her tone as she saw Nick fast asleep, his phone balancing on his chest.  She smiled fondly at the sight as she carefully picked it up and placed it on the bedside table and switched off the lamp. She fixed the blankets, tucking Nick in properly, like she used to do when it was a lot smaller and allowed her to do so. She placed a soft kiss on his forehead as he slept. She glanced at Nellie who was curled up asleep beside Nick on the bed. Normally she would shift Nellie. She didn’t want her getting used to sleeping in Nick’s bed or she would want to do it all the time. She allowed it every once in a while and Nick being under the weather was certainly an exception.  She left the room, leaving the door open a smidge and went to get ready for bed herself. Hopefully Nick would get a better nights sleep than last. 

Nick blinked his eyes open as sunlight crept in to his room. He was still so tired as he had experienced another rough night. He’d slept right through until about 4am before waking up and falling in to a fit of coughing, so violently that he almost made himself sick. The commotion had woken up Sarah, who was by his side in an instant. Rubbing his back, helping him take the inhaler and instructing him to take small sips of water. He had fallen back asleep about 5am with Sarah running her fingers through his hair, she’d ended up falling asleep herself until about 8ish when she got up and headed downstairs. Nick remained fast asleep so she didn’t want to disturb him. Sleep was the best medicine.   Nick glanced at the clock it was nearly 11:30am. He couldn’t believe he had slept that amount of time. He had obviously needed it. He grabbed his phone and read through some of his notifications. 

Charlie - (8:03) Morning ❤️ hope you managed to get some sleep. 

Charlie - (10:02) Heading to rugby in a bit. Pray for me 🙏🏼

Charlie - (11:00) I’m filling in for you. If you don’t hear from me again. I’ve died. Ps love you. Hope you’re resting. 

Nick couldn’t help but chuckle at his boyfriend’s silliness. He heard the door creek open and Nellie bounced up on to the bed, excited to see him awake.  “Hi Nellie girl..” Nick croaked, giving her morning belly rubs. Nellie licked his face and curled up next to him. Sarah entered the room carrying a steaming mug and a plate of lightly buttered toast. “Oh good, you’re awake..” she smiled sitting them down on the side. Nick returned the smile and instantly reached for the mug of tea. He didn’t touch the plate of toast.  Sarah fussed over him for a bit, taking his temperature, which had went down slightly but was still above average. She gave him his morning antibiotics and some more paracetamol.  “Eat your toast, love.” She told him as she kissed his cheek and turned to leave.  Nick grimaced as he picked up a slice of toast and nibbled on the edge of it. He was surprised to find himself polishing off the slice. He didn’t reach for a second though as he didn’t want to over do it.  He sipped his tea and leaned back. The tightness in his chest had eased a little and breathing was a little more easier. Thanks to the humidifier. He closed his eyes and was about to drift off again when he heard the doorbell ring. Nellie instantly leapt off the bed. Barking and tail wagging, she rushed downstairs to greet whoever it was.   Nick’s eyes pinged open when he heard a very familiar voice. Charlie. 

Charlie had wasted no time in rushing over to see Nick after Rugby. He wanted to share the good news. They had won against St John’s and of course he wanted to see his poorly boyfriend. He’d politely declined the invite to go get lunch with their friends as he just wanted to see Nick. So he’d walked straight there as soon as the rugby match had ended.  Nellie had greeted him at the front door. Excited to see his other big brother. Charlie gave her great scratches and belly rubs just like Nick.  “Charlie sweetheart, hi..” Sarah smiled as she poked her head out of the kitchen. “Hi Sarah.” Charlie returned the smile.  “I hope you don’t mind me just stopping by.”  “Nonsense dear..” Sarah replied as she dried her hands on a tea towel and pulled him in for a hug which he happily accepted.  “How’s Nick doing?” He asked. Sarah sighed.  “Poor things not well at all.” Charlie sighed. He hated the of Nick feeling so bad.  “His fever is down a little though so that’s progress..” she explained. “His cough is still horrendous, but hopefully the antibiotics will kick in soon.” Charlie nodded.  “Is it alright if I pop up to see him? I won’t stay long…”  Sarah smiled. Charlie was such a lovely, polite boy.  “Of course, darling. I’m just making some soup. Would you like a bowl? I really need to get Nicky to eat.”   Charlie smiled. Sarah’s cooking was always delicious. “Yes, please. That sounds great.” Sarah grinned. “I’ll bring it up when it’s ready.”  Charlie smiled again before turning and climbing the stairs, Nellie was hot on his heels. He gently knocked on his boyfriend’s bedroom door before stepping inside.  Nick was wrapped up in blankets, curled on his side. His eyes glassed over with fever but his face broke out in to a smile when he saw charlie.  

“Hi..” he croaked. Charlie wasted no time in walking over to the bed and perching on the side. “Hi..” he said, resting his hand on Nick’s cheek. “You’re really warm.” He hissed. If this was Nick’s fever on the lower side, he hated to think what it was like last night. “You’re mum’s making soup.” He said as she ran his fingers through Nick’s hair. Nick just nodded in response as he leaned in to Charlie’s touch.  “How was the game?”    “We won!” Charlie grinned. Nick pulled himself into a sitting position, a little too quickly as he literally collapsed against the pillow with a heavy sigh,  causing Charlie to chuckle. “Easy tiger.” He laughed.  “I’m so proud of you!” Nick grinned. “I didn’t hit a score though.” Charlie pouted.  “You played though. I know you’ve been worried about having to do that since the last St John’s match, so I’m proud.” Nick smiled. “I’m just gutted I wasn’t there to see it.”   “Don’t worry.” Charlie laughed. “Tao recorded the whole match. He will probably make you watch it at the next movie night.”  Nick laughed. “Can’t wait.”   “You feeling any better?” Charlie asked sceptically as he leaned back against the headboard. Nick

Shrugged his shoulders. “Doesn’t sound like an elephant is sitting on my chest anymore.”  Charlie snorted. “That’s good I guess.” He laughed.  “I recall you promising me cuddles.” Nick smirked.  Charlie rolled his eyes but then smiled fondly as he wrapped his arm around Nick’s shoulders and allowed the older boy to lay his head on his chest.  “That better?” He asked.  “Much.” Nick grinned. 10 minutes later Sarah knocked at the door and smiled at the sight.  “I’ve made you both some lunch..” she announced as she placed two bowls of soup on the side. “Sounds lovely, thank you Sarah.” Charlie smiled politely.  Sarah picked up the remainder of Nick’s toast and empty mug of tea, satisfied that he had eaten some of that earlier.  “Try and eat some Nicky..” Nick just groaned in response. He was quite content in his cocoon of blankets cuddled in to his boyfriend.  Sarah and Charlie exchanged an amused look. Sarah reached in to her cardigan pocket, placing the blister pack of antibiotics down. “Will you make sure he takes them after he’s eaten something?” She asked Charlie, who nodded in response before leaving them to it. Charlie tried to shift slightly out Nick’s embrace causing him to whimper and pout. “You need to eat some soup. It will help.” Charlie chuckled.  “Cuddles.” Nick simply said. Charlie rolled his eyes. If he thought Nick was clingy at the best of times then he was ten times more clingier when he wasn’t feeling well.  “If I promise to eat something, will you?” He replied. Knowing that always seemed to work. Nick picked his head up, looking at his boyfriend with glassy eyes.  “Fine.”  Charlie grinned to himself. Satisfied as he placed the tray with the bowls of soup on his lap. Nick hoisted himself up against the headboard and reached for the soup. It did smell pretty good actually. Sarah always made the best soup when he was poorly.  He managed to polish off the full bowl and take his antibiotics.  Charlie finished his bowl of soup and let Nick cuddle back in to him. “You’re gonna get sick, too.” Nick mumbled as he shuffled on to his chest.  “I don’t care.” Charlie replied, as long as Nick was happy and comfortable.  “Besides if I do, you’d need to look after me. Which means more cuddles.” He chuckled.  Nick laughed.  “Yeah, not the worst thing that could happen…” he said stifling a yawn. “Tired, baby?” Charlie asked as he ran his fingers through  Nick’s hair, in which the older boy nodded.  “Go to sleep..”  “Stay..” Nick mumbled sleepily. “I’m not going anywhere.” Charlie promised as Nick drifted off.  

That’s how they spent the remainder of the day. Cuddled up in Nick’s bed watching movies.  It took Nick another week to feel completely better but it was worth it as he had the best mum and best boyfriend looking after him. Sometimes being sick had its perks.  

Chapter Text

Nick stuffed the last of his clothes into his duffel bag and squeezed it shut. He hated packing but he was so excited for the weekend. The Paris squad were going camping! The Easter holidays had just begun and they had two whole weeks off school to look forward to. Everyone had revision for upcoming exams but they’d all decided to have a fun weekend away first before knuckling down and getting stuck into boring revision. Nick was really looking forward to time with friends and getting to share a tent with Charlie for two whole nights. He slung his bag over his shoulder and picked up his sleeping bag, pillow and mat. He stumbled along the hallway and down the stairs, dropping them all into a pile by the front door. He checked his watch. Tao’s mum was picking him up in a little while. She had a large car that could fit Tao, Elle, Charlie, Nick and Isaac. The rest of the gang were meeting them there.
“You all set darling?” Sarah appeared in the hallway, drying her hands on a tea towel. “Time for a cup of tea with your old mum before you leave?”
Nick grinned, “ always.” He followed her into the kitchen and began gathering mugs while Sarah popped the kettle on. He sat down at the table grabbing a biscuit from the open pack. “ have you packed any snacks sweetheart?” Nick shook his head, “Tao’s mum is stopping off at the big Tesco on the way so we are all going to stock up together, make sure we don’t double up on anything.” Sarah smiled fondly at Nick as he hoovered up more biscuits. “Have you sorted meals?” Nick nodded, “yep, don’t worry mum we have it under control.” Sarah sighed, “you’ll understand one day Nicky, I’ll always worry about you. What about a first aid kit is anyone bringing one?” Nick paused his demolition of the biscuit packet, “um actually I don’t know.” He admitted. Sarah was up instantly,”I’ll grab you a few things, just for in case ok? Last thing you want is someone to cut themselves and you’ve no antiseptic wipes or plasters.”
Nick chuckled as he watched her whizz round the kitchen gathering items for a first aid kit. She seemed thrilled to be being useful and he had to admit it wasn’t a bad idea. Darcy was the definition of clumsy and if anyone was going to hurt themselves it was probably her. He finished his tea and was putting his mug in the dishwasher when Sarah handed him a small toiletry bag, “here you are, pop it in your bag to keep your old mum happy.” Nick took it was a smile and thanked her. He managed to find space in his bag and was just zipping it back up when the doorbell rang, making him jump.
Tao’s face appeared through the letterbox, “come on Nelson we are on a schedule here!” Nick laughed, opening the door. “Ok I’m ready,”he pulled on his shoes and shouted a goodbye to his mum.
“Be safe Nicky,” she came rushing through to hug him goodbye, “have fun, call me if there are any problems. You have your phone battery pack yes?”
“Course, and of course I will. Love you mum,” Nick hugged her back tightly before grabbing his stuff and following Tao to the car. “Hi Yan, thanks for the lift,” he said as he put his things in the boot. “No problem darling, my pleasure.” Yan smiled back.
Nick climbed into the back where Isaac and Elle were already sat waiting. “Hi guys,” he grinned at them. Tao sat in the front with his mum, “right mum, Charlie’s next and then we are ready to go!” Elle Isaac and Nick all whooped and clapped, “I’m so excited, we are going to have the best time,” Elle squealed. Nick smiled, he couldn’t agree more.
After another stop to collect Charlie who was not quite ready when they left and a five minute chat with Julio about the dangers of the forest and how best to keep a campfire under control, they were finally on their way.
The campsite they were staying at was only half an hour away, in a lovely secluded wooded area. The pitch they had reserved was near a lake and had its own fire pit. They had two large tents, each big enough to sleep 6 so Tao, Elle Charlie, isaac and Nick were sharing one and Sahar, Imogen Tara and Darcy the other. There should be plenty of room for everyone. The upside of booking with this site was that the tents would already be up when they arrived.
They stopped off at Tesco and stocked up on far too many snacks. As the only 18 year old, Nick bought some drinks for the gang to share. They staggered back to the car and put the supplies in the boot.
It wasn’t much further to the campsite and Yan waved through the window as she left, “have fun my darlings, see you in a couple of days!” Everyone yelled their thanks to her. The girls had arrived already and were waiting for them at the side of the car park. Darcy turned to the gang as they approached, arms up in the air as they yelled, “ the Paris squad camping trip begins now!” They ran at the group, flinging themselves towards them. Nick put his rugby skills to use and caught them easily, hugging them tightly. The rest of the group joined in a group hug, everyone was chatting and it was noisy, chaotic and fun. Nick was so happy. He beamed at Charlie, grabbing his hand and pulling him into a cuddle. “This weekend is going to be amazing,” he murmured into his ear. Charlie grinned back. “Let’s go find our tent!”
Tara appeared with a map and a trolley for all their gear. “Our plot is here, according to the man at reception,” she indicated the cross on the map. It was a bit of a walk from the car park so they were grateful for the trolley to carry most of their stuff. Nick took charge of pulling it along after Darcy had clipped the heels of virtually the entire group, causing Tao to complain bitterly, “ok fine, put your rugby muscles to use,” they huffed before jumping onto Tara’s back and demanding she carry them to the plot.
It was warm for spring and everyone was sweaty and sticky when they finally reached the tents. “Oh it’s so beautiful,” gushed Tara, putting Darcy down and staring at the vast lake in front of them. “Wow,” Imogen breathed out. This is perfect!”
Nick looked over at Charlie, who was staring out across the lake. “It’s perfect,” he agreed.
They spent some time unloading their things and getting set up in the tents. It was too early for dinner so Imogen suggested they all have a swim in the lake. Everyone agreed enthusiastically apart from Isaac who waved his book at them and sat down on the picnic bench. “ I’ll watch and keep an eye on our things,” he said happily. “I’ll stay with you,” Charlie said quickly. Nick frowned at him. “It’s fine nick. Honestly. You go have some fun. I’ll warm you up when you get back. Nick searched Charlie’s face but only saw a sincere look, so he shrugged, kissed him on the lips and then started emptying his bag on top of his sleeping bag in the hunt for his trunks.
Charlie watched as Nick and the others raced up to the lake edge, shrieking as the ice cold water hit their toes. He was feeling so much better about himself lately, he could kick himself for not going in. But at the same time he wasn’t quite ready to strip down to his trunks in front of everyone. And the water looked bloody freezing. He chuckled as he watched the rest of the group inching into the water. Nick shouted something that sounded like, ‘fuck it’ and then dunked himself under the water, coming up with a gasp. “Fuck that’s cold!” He shouted.
With nicks encouragement, soon everyone was swimming happily and a strange game of tag began. “You sure you don’t want to go in?” Isaac asked his friend.
“Nah, it looks bloody cold! What about you? “ Isaac shook his head. “Definitely not. Crisp?” He offered the bag to Charlie who happily took a handful and started munching on them. Isaac smiled at him. “Shall we see if we can get the bbq lit? Everyone will be starving when they get out.”
“Great idea,” Charlie stood up brushing the crumbs from his hands. The bbq looked simple enough. They loaded it up with coal and some fire lighters and by the time the others came shivering out of the lake they had managed to get it heated up. Nick rushed up to Charlie, dripping everywhere. “Nick!” He shrieked, don’t get me wet!” Nick laughed, chasing him around the campsite before finally stopping and grabbing a towel from the tent. He dried himself off and came to sit down next to the others. The sun was still warm so most of them were still in their swimming things, making the most of the late afternoon heat. Nick stretched his legs out, wiggling his toes in the long grass. Elle and Sahar had opened up the cool box and were busy putting some sausages and burgers on the bbq. Tao and Isaac were buttering some rolls and Darcy was opening some of the cider Nick had bought at Tesco on the way. “This is just so nice,” Nick sighed contentedly. Charlie was in complete agreement. A whole weekend without their parents. He was still amazed his mum had agreed to it but she had been surprisingly chill about the whole thing. It bode well for when Nick was at uni later this year. Hopefully she’d be ok about him going up to visit every so often. Darcy handed everyone a cup. “Cheers guys,” they shouted, before downing the cider in one. “Slow down Darcy, we’ve got all night,” Tara laughed. Darcy just grinned at her before letting out a loud burp.
Nick and Charlie clinked their paper cups together and drank their cider. After a while Nick sighed, “I need a piss,” he looked over to the wooded area beside the tent. The toilet block was a long walk. He really couldn’t be bothered to go all the way back. “I’m gonna go find a quiet tree,” he said standing up. “Ok, want to borrow my sliders?” Charlie glanced at nicks bare feet. “Yeah thanks char, good idea.” He popped them on and walked a little ways into the wood until he was sure nobody was around.
Feeling better, he started to walk back towards the group when he felt a sudden sharp sting on his toe. “Fuck, shit. “ he hissed, lifting his foot off the ground. He watched in horror as a snake slithered away from him at speed. He looked at his big toe which had two very clear puncture holes. “Bugger,” he said. His toe felt like it was on fire, it really hurt. He gingerly put his foot down on the ground and the pain exploded. Leaning against a tree he shook the slider off his foot and slid down to the ground. It was only once he was sat, leaning back against the tree that he realised that was probably not a good idea as there was a snake somewhere near. He didn’t even know there were snakes that bit you in this country. He’d never seen one before. Mum had seen a grass snake in the garden once she said but he was never convinced she was right. He managed to stand back up again. His foot was swelling up. The big toe was double the size. Nick groaned in frustration. He didn’t want to spoil their evening. But there was no way he would be able to hide this from Charlie. It hurt like hell. Slowly he started limping back towards the others, slider in hand. “Come on Nick,” yelled Sahar, “ there’s a burger ready for you!” He watched as Charlie turned to face him and saw the moment he realised that something was wrong. He was up out of his seat and racing over to Nick in a flash. “What’s happened?” He looked down at nicks foot and gasped. It was double the size of his other foot and was an angry purple colour. “Shit, Nick, what the hell happened?”
Nick had gone pale. His forehead was sweaty. He could feel an odd sensation of panic coming over him. He looked at Charlie, “a snake bit me,” he stammered out. Charlie’s eyes widened. “What the fuck? Are you serious?” Nick nodded, gritting his teeth at the pain pulsing from his foot. Charlie took him by the arm and helped him limp slowly towards the others who were all looking over at them as they neared the group.

“What’s going on guys?” Tara asked as she placed a plate of buttered burger buns in the middle, next to the campfire. She then glanced up, frowning as she saw Nick. His face was chalk white as if he had seen a ghost. He was sweating and evidently limping as he gripped on to Charlie for support. “Nick? Are you okay? You don’t look so good.” She asked, alerting the rest of their friends who turned around to see what the commotion was. “Nick?? What’s happened?” Tao asked, noticing that Nick’s face was scrunched up in pain and he was breathing heavily. “He’s been bitten.” Charlie said, his voice wavering. This really was quite serious. Nick had been bitten. By a snake!! Was it poisonous? What was he supposed to do? Was Nick going to be okay? Shit. This was really bad considering they were in the woods in the middle of nowhere. How on earth were they going to get to the hospital?? That was bad. Really bad. “Oh god…” Ellie said, looking at her friend in concern. “By what? There’s loads of spiders around here…” Nick collapsed on to one of the logs with a thump. He couldn’t bear to stand any longer. His toe was throbbing. It was so painful. He felt like he was about to pass out. “It…it was a snake..” he said softly. His voice was shaky. He was in shock. “Oh my god!” Tara screeched. “What kind of snake? What if it’s poisonous? What are we going to do!!!” “Tara…” Charlie said calmly. He knew she was panicked. He was too but freaking out like this wasn’t helping. It certainly wasn’t helping Nick. “Elle your mums a nurse, isn’t she?” Sahar asked. “She’ll know what to do..” “uh.. yeah.” Ellie mumbled, clearly shaken up by the events she pulled her phone out her pocket and cursed under her breath as she realised she had limited signal. She moved a few steps to the right and breathed a sign of relief when she noticed she’d gotten another few bars. She pressed her phone to her ear.

Nick tried to take deep breaths to stop himself from hyperventilating. Issac pressed a water bottle in to his hand and instructed he take small sips. The pain in his foot was unbearable. It had spread over the entirety of his foot and around his ankle area. The swelling had intensified. His toe and majority of his foot was swollen, angry red and puffy. He had a thin layer of sweat on his forehead and he felt sick. Probably the adrenaline. He couldn’t believe this had happened. Why had he been so stupid? He should have just gone to the designated toilets on the campsite instead of venturing in to the wooded area. “Sorry…” Nick mumbled, his voice was barely higher than a whisper as he shivered violently. He didn’t even feel cold but he couldn’t stop shuddering. Darcy noticed and grabbed a blanket from one of the tents, draping around their friends shoulders. “Hey.” Charlie soothed bending down in front of Nick and forcing his boyfriend to look at him as he squeezed his hand comfortingly. “You have nothing to apologise for…” This wasn’t Nick’s fault. It was just a very unfortunate event.

“Okay mum…I am putting you on speaker now.” Ellie said as she placed her phone down. “I need you to check the site of the bite. Is there any puss or fluid seeping?” Miriam Argent asked. The last thing she had been expecting to happen on her Saturday evening home from work was her 17 year old daughter panicky calling to inform her that one of her friends had been bitten by a snake. “I…I don’t think so.” Elle said as she bent down on to her knees to inspect Nick’s foot properly. She carefully pressed down on the area to make sure there wasn’t any leakage. Nick let out a sharp hiss of pain and Elle shot him an apologetic look. “His whole foot is really badly swollen, though and red. It looks really painful mum.” “Is he running a fever?” Elle glanced up at Charlie for confirmation. Charlie lightly placed the back of his hand on Nick’s forehead. He was clammy and sweaty and a little warm. He nodded. “I think so..” Elle replied, feeling unnerved when she heard her mum curse under her breath on the other line. “Okay, listen carefully.” Miriam instructed. “I need you to clean the puncture site with water.” Tao instantly grabbed a bottle of water and unscrewed the cap. He apologised in advance to Nick before slowly tipping the water over the wound causing the older boy to wince and groan in pain. “How long for?” Elle asked. “For around 10 minutes. You need to clean the area throughly…” After around 10 minutes and 3 and a half litre bottles of water later. Thank god for Jane Spring and her impulsive excessive water buying. You’ll thank me later Charlie when you’re not dehydrated. Miriam spoke again.

“Now you need to cover Nick’s foot with something clean and dry. Preferably a bandage if you have one??” Elle glanced at her friends hopeful that one of them had been smart enough to pack any, she wasn’t surprised to be met with blank faces. “Backpack…” Nick mumbled quietly. “What?” Charlie asked, squeezing his boyfriend’s hand. “Front sip…” Nick whispered. He was struggling to concentrate. The pain was too much. His whole foot was burning and throbbing. Imogen acted swiftly as she grabbed Nick’s backpack out of his and Charlie’s shared tent and ripped open the front sip to reveal bandages, plasters, antiseptic wipes, painkillers, tissues & safety pins. Charlie danced at Nick. “Your mum?” In which his boyfriend nodded. “God bless Sarah Nelson!” Darcy cheered as they handed over the bandages to Tara. She was trained in first aid. She knew what she was doing. “What about the wipes?” Imogen suggested. “They’re antiseptic.” “No!” Miriam explained from the other side of the phone. “Don’t put anything on the wound. Just use the bandage to keep the area clean and covered.” Tara loosely wrapped the bandage around Nicks big toe and then secured the rest of the blanket around the foot, using a safety pin to keep it in place. “Ok, now I need you to be very specific. Where exactly are you?” Miriam said. Elle explained their location as best as she could and Miriam explained that she was on the phone to 999 on another line. “They’re dispatching an ambulance.” She explained. “I need one of you to stay near the main road so you can direct the paramedics to Nick.” “Ambulance?” Darcy gasped. “Is that really necessary?” She hadn’t expected a tiny snake bite to be this serious. “It’s vital Nick is treated with antivenin as soon as possible. We don’t know what type of snake he was bitten with, do we?” Elle looked at Charlie who glanced at Nick who was beginning to look paler by the minute. The shock had well and truly kicked in. “I…I didn’t see.” Nick stuttered. “It…it was black…I think…I…I don’t know.” He had suddenly begun to feel quite cold. “Shhh it’s okay.” Charlie whispered as he placed a kiss on Nick’s clammy forehead. The last thing Nick needed was getting distressed. “It really hurts, char…” Nick usually had a high pain tolerance but the pain that was exploding through his foot right now was something like he’d never experienced ever and he’d broken several bones before playing rugby, but this pain was on a different scale. The snake was tiny. The bite was tiny. Yet his whole foot was throbbing and felt like it was on fire. “Deep breaths.” Charlie instructed. “Helps on its way.” Nick wanted his mum but he didn’t want to appear weak and pathetic but he wanted his mum. She always knew what to do. She always knew how to keep him calm and make him feel better when he was hurt or feeling poorly. “I’m going to call your mum Nick, is that ok?” Miriam asked through the call. Nick felt a weight off his chest and let out a sigh of relief. “Yes please…” he replied. Miriam stayed on the line, called Sarah and waited until the paramedics had reached the campsite.

Sarah had just sat down in front of the TV for the evening with her favourite Chinese takeaway and a glass of wine. Nellie had been walked and settled and Nicky was away camping with his friends so she had free rein of the TV all weekend. She could catch up on all her shows. She had just pressed play when her phone started ringing. She glanced at the coffee table beside the settee where her phone was. Incoming call. Miriam Argent. She suddenly felt a cold feeling wash over her. Why was Elle’s mother calling? Had something happened? She instantly answered. “Hello?” “Hi Sarah. So sorry to call you like this.” Miriam replied on the other line. “Not at all Miriam, is everything okay?” She asked, curiously, feeling unnerved and the air suspended in her throat. “I don’t want you to panic..” Miriam said. Sarah felt a lump in a throat. Don’t panic? Why? What’s wrong? Had something happened to Nick? “It’s Nick..” she felt her heart shatter. “What’s wrong? Is Nicky okay?” Sarah asked immediately. “He’s been bitten..” bitten? Bitten by what? “Okay…” Sarah said softly, trying not to panic herself too much. “By what?” She asked, not sure if she wanted to hear the answer. “He’s been bitten by a snake…” Sarah gasped. That wasn’t good. Not in the slightest. Snake bites could be deadly. “He was bitten on his foot.” Miriam explained. “I’ve called an ambulance. He is conscious, but he’s in pain.” “What kind of snake?” Sarah asked. “I’m not sure. Nick didn’t see. I think he’s in shock.” Sarah felt her heart ache. The thought of her son being in pain and wanting her and she wasn’t there. “He’s going to need a shot of anti-venom at the hospital for sure. The wound will need cleaned out properly. The kids have cleaned it with water but it will need sterile cleaned, also.” Miriam told her. “He’s also running a temperature but that’s probably just his body reacting to the venom.” Sarah wasted no time in grabbing her car keys and heading to the hospital. She needed to be there for when Nicky arrived. Oh what a turn the evening had taken.

Nick felt cold. It wasn’t cold at all. It was a sunny evening, but he couldn’t help shivering, despite the thick blanket that was wrapped around his shoulders. He couldn’t stop his hands shaking. His foot hurt, he felt sick and scared. What was going to happen. What if it was deadly? What if it was poisonous. Was he going to die? He was terrified. Charlie wrapped his arm around his boyfriend’s shoulders. He could tell Nick was scared. He was too. He felt a little useless. He didn’t really know what to do. Thank god for Elle and calling her mum, at least he knew they had gotten medical advice and that the paramedics were on their way. Nick was going to get help. Not long now. He glanced at his boyfriend’s face. Nick was miles away. His dark eyes swimming deep in thought. “Nick?” He asked. Nick had to stay coherent. Miriam had said it was vital that Nick stayed awake and talking until the professionals arrived. “Nick?” He said a little louder watching as the older boy snapped out of his trance. His beautiful brown eyes brimming with tears. “I’m sorry…” Nick sniffed. Charlie frowned. What on earth was Nick apologising for? “What?” He asked, dumbfounded. “I’m sorry…” Nick repeated, letting out a choked sob. Charlie’s eyes widened. Nick was really upset. “Nick…” “I ruined our trip..” Nick sobbed. “Nick, nooo.” Charlie said softly. Nick was feeling guilty and it broke his heart. He had nothing to feel guilty for. What had happened hadn’t been his fault and it could have quite easily happened to any of them. “Nick, it isn’t your fault.” Charlie assured him. “You didn’t run anything.” “Everyone’s been looking so forward to this weekend.” Nick sobbed, as tears rolled down his cheeks. He hated being the reason that the camping trip was being cut short. “There will be other weekends.” Charlie told him as he squeezed his hand. Tara who had overheard the conversation, sat down at the opposite side of Nick, placing her hand on top of his. “Charlie’s right..” she said in a soothing voice. “You haven’t ruined anything. We can do it again when you’re feeling better.” “We’ve been planning this for ages though…” Nick sighed. Trust stupid him to get bitten by a stupid snake. He was an idiot. Why did he think it was a good idea to go do a piss in the bushes. He should’ve just gone to the actual toilets. This could have been prevented but instead he’d cut corners which had resulted in his friend’s weekend being cut short. He felt awful. Suddenly ambulance sirens were heard close by. Tao stood up. “I’ll go meet the paramedics by the footpath and lead them here.” “I’ll go with you.” Issac volunteered. “You hear that?” Charlie told Nick. “The ambulance is here…they’re going to make you feel better, okay?” He soothed. Nick just blinked as more tears rolled down his cheeks. This was the worst weekend ever.

“Hi Nick, I’m Steve and this is my colleague Liam.” one of the paramedics introduced himself as he knelt down in front of them. “Can I take a look at this foot of yours?” He asked. He could sense the teenagers distress right away. Nick nodded slowly, hesitantly. The last thing he was wanting was anyone poking around his sore foot, but he know the paramedic was here to help. Steve peeled back the bandage and inspected the bite on Nick’s toe. He tried to be as gentle as possible as he could tell just by looking at it how painful it must be. “That’s a nasty bite there, all right..” he said as he removed the bandage, dabbed the area with a sterile solution, apologising as the teenager hissed out in pain and then applied a fresh dressing. “I’m going to insert a Cannula in to one of the veins in the back of your hand so that I can administer some anti-venom as it’s vital we treat the bite with a dose of antivenom as soon as we can. Is that alright Nick?” Steve asked as he rubbed some antibacterial gel between his fingers before slipping on some latex gloves. Nick nodded hesitantly. He wouldn’t say he was exactly okay with it. He hated needles, but he didn’t really have a choice. He knew he needed the injection. “Ok…” he said quietly. Charlie knew his boyfriend inside and out. He knew that Nick had a fear of needles. He teased him often enough, not maliciously though, in a playful manner. He knew Nick was scared so he reached out and squeezed his other hand gently. “You can do this, babe.” He whispered. “I’m right here, ok?” He wanted Nick to feel safe and comforted. Nick nodded and decided it would probably be better if he didn’t look. So he squeezed his eyes shut as the paramedic prepared the needle and drip. He did let out a little wince when he felt the needle pierce his skin. It wasn’t too bad. Just a little nippy but nothing compared to the burning pain in his toe. “Good Job, Nick.” Steve spoke. “That’s the IV cannula in place. Now I’m just going to give you a dose of anti-venom, okay?” Nick nodded, although he still had his eyes squeezed tightly shut. Steve administered between 4-6 vials of the antivenin drug before connecting a clear bag of saline solution to the drip to prevent Nick from becoming dehydrated. “Okay Nick.” Liam, the other paramedic spoke. “The ambulance is just parked down at the end of the footpath, I’m going to help you stand up and support you over to it. Alright?” Nick felt a little uneasy about standing up as the thought of putting any pressure on his poorly foot was agonising. “I have been informed that your mum will meet us at the hospital, ok?” Steve said as he supported Liam in getting Nick stood up. Nick shifted his wait on to his support as he tried to keep as much pressure as he could off of his sore foot. Charlie quickly gathered up as much as Nick’s things as he could and stuffed them in to his backpack. “Can I come?” He asked Steve, hopefully. “Please…I…I’m his boyfriend.” Steve gave him a soft smile. “That’s absolutely fine. I’m sure Nick will appreciate someone, eh buddy?” He asked as he gripped on to Nick’s shoulders as he supported him towards the foot path. Nick grinned in return. Charlie was coming too. He didn’t feel as scared anymore. He held tightly on to the crutches that Liam had fetched from the ambulance to make the short walk easier. “Feel better soon Nick.” Tara called. “Yeah let us know how you get on.” “Hope your foot doesn’t fall off Nicholas.” Darcy replied adding their own humorous twist to the situation. Nick rolled his eyes as he knew it was all in good spirits.

The ride to the hospital wasn’t too long. Nick had been propped up on a stretcher so he could keep his leg elevated. He was receiving fluids through his IV, but wasn’t allowed any pain relief until the wound had been properly examined at the hospital. “I can’t believe I ruined the trip.” Nick huffed folding his arms against his chest but being careful as to not knock the cannula in his hand. “Nick…” Charlie replied firmly. They’d already been through this. Nick needed to stop blaming himself. What had happened was unfortunate, yes. It could have happened to any one of them though. “It wasn’t your fault…” Charlie reminded him. “It just sucks.” Nick sulked. “We were supposed to have the best time.” Charlie sighed. He knew Nick was disappointed at how the evening had went but they would make up for it once he was feeling better. He would make sure of it. “Right here we are…” Steve announced as he pulled the ambulance into a parking bay right outside the hospital where two porters were already waiting alongside a frantic looking Sarah Nelson. The back doors to the ambulance opened and the stretcher was lowered. Charlie climbed out, giving Sarah a small smile to try and convince her that Nick was doing okay. “Oh Nicky…” she said tearily as soon as she saw her son. “Mum…” Nick said. He was so glad to see her. “Let’s go get this poorly leg seen to, eh?” One of the hospital porters smiled as he took charge of the stretcher as Steve conducted the paramedic handover as they approached one of the examining bays of the hospital. Charlie and Sarah hung back in the room, not wanting to get in the way as the doctors and nurses tended to Nick. They cleaned the area of the bite out properly which wasn’t a fun ordeal for Nick as he cried out in pain. They then administered some antibiotics and antihistamine through Nick’s IV to help with the redness and swelling. One of the doctors approached Sarah, introducing himself. “I’d like to keep Nicholas overnight for monitoring. As we’re not aware of the snake bite I’d like to keep a close observation on him to make sure there is no delayed reaction to the venom. He is running a low grade fever which is a typically normal reaction to a snake bite, but I’d like to keep an eye on that as well…” He explained. “Nurse Andrea is going to finish re-bandaging Nick’s foot and then we will get him admitted. Does that all sound alright?” Sarah nodded. “Yes, thank you.” She smiled, although the thought of her son having to spend the night in hospital wasn’t a good one and she could tell just by the sour expression on Nicky’s face that he was less than thrilled.

“I don’t want to stay here.” Nick huffed. “It hurts, yeah, but I feel alright apart from that.” He sighed. He didn’t want to stay here. He hated hospitals. He hated the thought of having to stay here on his own. “I know, baby,” Sarah soothed as she ran her fingers through his hair in a comforting manner. “You heard the doctor. It’s just procedure. You’d hate to go home and then have to come back in the middle of the night, wouldn’t you?” Nick sighed. She had a point. She was right. She was always right. “I guess so..” he sighed. He had no choice on the matter. It had been decided for him. “I’ll call your brother and ask him to drop off a bag so that you have your own pjs, how does that sound?” “David’s home?” Nick asked flatly. “He got home this afternoon. He’s staying for the week.” Sarah explained. Nick groaned. Great. Not only did he have to deal with the pain of the snake bite on his foot but he would also have to put up with the agony of dealing with his older brother when he got home. The nurse then explained that the porter was here to transfer Nick to the ward and would fetch them when he was settled in. Much to Nick’s displeasure. Sarah kissed his cheek and watched as he was wheeled away. “I could really go a cup of tea whilst we wait, how about you darling?” “Definitely.” Charlie grinned, following her towards the little hospital canteen. Sarah quickly called David to explain what had happened as she had just rushed out earlier without an explanation. She told him what had happened and asked if he could pack and drop off a bag for Nicky which he grumpily, finally agreed to as long as it didn’t interfere with his evening plans. Sarah then purchased a cup of tea for herself and Charlie. “He really doesn’t want to stay here, huh?” Charlie said as they sat down in the waiting area. Sarah sighed and shook her head. “He hates hospitals.” She admitted. “He’s only ever had to stay in hospital once before when he was 11. Appendicitis..” she explained. Ah so that would explain the scar on Nick’s lower abdomen. He’s never questioned it before but always wondered. “He told me he hates hospitals and needles and anything like that.” Charlie said as he sipped his tea. “Yeah.” Sarah nodded. “He always has..” “He’s gutted this happened.” Charlie sighed. “I can tell. He looked upset.” Sarah agreed. “He is.” Charlie sighed. “He feels bad that he’s ruined the weekend.” “It wasn’t done purposely.” “Exactly!!” Charlie said. “He won’t listen though.” “Stubborn one, my boy.” Sarah chuckled. “He feels guilty that he’s ruined it for everyone. I keep telling him that we have all holiday. He won’t listen.” “He’s probably just feeling disappointed. I know how much he had been looking forward to this weekend.” “Yeah.” Charlie sighed. Suddenly an idea struck. “I’ve just had the best idea.” “Oh??” Sarah asked. Charlie grinned. “Ok, hear me out…”

Staying in hospital overnight wasn’t just as terrible as Nick had imagined it. He fell asleep almost instantly after Charlie and his mum had left last night. His room wasn’t so bad. He was lucky to have secured a small singular room. So that was nice. Not having to share with people he didn’t know. David had dropped off some pjs so he didn’t have to wear the itchy hospital cotton gowns. His fever had broken sometime during the night and the swelling had gone down somewhat on his foot. The pain was nowhere near as bad as it had been yesterday. The doctor had come by around 1pm to checkup on him. He removed his bandage, cleaned the area again and put a thinner bandage on. “I’m happy with how this looks.” He smiled. “There doesn’t seem to be any signs opf infection and Nicholas has responded well to the anti venom and antibiotic drugs..” Nick glanced up to him with a hopeful look on his face. “Does that mean I can go home?” He asked. The doctor smiled softly. “I don’t see why not. One of the nurses will be around soon with some discharge paperwork.” Nick grinned. Thank god. The night hadn’t been the worst but he definitely didn’t want to spend another night here. The first thing he did with message Charlie.

Nick: Guess who’s getting home???
Charlie: OMG!😃 that’s the best news. I bet you can’t wait?
Nick: too right! I hate hospitals…
Charlie: oh I know 😂
Nick: can I see you later??🥹
Charlie: hmmmm not sure about that🤔
Nick: pleaseee😇 I need cuddles
Charlie: you need cuddles?
Nick: it’s a matter of life and death
Charlie: it’s a bit soon to joke about death considering you literally almost died yesterday…
Nick: which is why I require boyfriend cuddles immediately
Charlie: you’re such a sap
Nick: but you love me 😇
Charlie: that’s very true
Nick: so do I get cuddles??
Charlie: I guess soooo🥰
Nick: 🥳🥳🥳🥳

Nick was given the all clear to be discharged around 2pm, much to his pleasure. Sarah packed up his bag as he got changed into joggers and a hoodie. The doctor had given him crutches to help with walking until he could place his foot flat on the floor and put pressure on it without it hurting. He had been very lucky. The snake hadn’t appeared to be too venomous. It could have ended up a lot worse. Some snake bites can be deadly, so Nick was one of the lucky ones.

“Let’s get you home, sweetheart.” Sarah grinned as she started the engine. “Yes please!” Nick smiled as he clipped his seatbelt in to place, desperate to see the back of the hospital. “You’ve been so brave my darling.” Sarah smiled. “I’m so proud of you.” “Looks like your first aid kit came in handy afterall.” Nick smirked. Sarah rolled her eyes. “See…it always pays off to be prepared.” Little did Nick know that Sarah had been secretly messaging Charlie whilst they had been waiting for Nick to be discharged. Charlie and the Paris squad had planned a little surprise.

“Home sweet home Nicky.” Sarah grinned as she pulled in to the drive. Nick smiled. It felt good to be home. Even if it had just been one night that he had spent in hospital. It had been one night too many. Nick unclipped his seatbelt as Sarah got his crutches from the back. She helped him in to the house. Nick had been expecting Nellie to bounce up to him excitedly like she always did, but she didn’t. She was nowhere in sight. Nick frowned. “Where’s Nellie?” He asked instantly. “Oh she’s out in the back garden with Charlie…” Sarah replied. Nick’s eyes lit up instantly. “Charlie’s here?” He exclaimed. Why didn’t she say so sooner? Sarah chuckled at the excited expression on her son’s face. Nick wasted no time in hopping through the kitchen towards the patio doors. He was so preoccupied by getting to see Charlie that he hadn’t noticed the dining table set up with paper plates and cups, cakes and snacks. Nick limped towards the patio doors with his crutches and stepped outside only to be met by Charlie, Nellie and all their friends, surrounded by the tents from the camping trip that had been re-set up in his garden.

“SURPRISE!!!”

Nick couldn’t believe his eyes. He was so overwhelmed. He couldn’t believe his friends had done this for him. They were recreating the camping trip. “We felt so bad about what happened that we decided we had to try again.” Tara grinned as she and Darcy engulfed Nick in a hug. “I can’t believe you guys have done this..” Nick replied. He had the best friends ever. “It was all Charlie’s idea.” Elle smiled as she got in on the hug, before they knew it, it turned in to a massive Paris Squad group hug. “Careful guys.” Charlie said. “Nick is still on crutches.” “I’m fine.” Nick smiled as he soaked up all the affection from his friends. “It’s not the same as proper camping.” Tao shrugged. “But we figured you’d still like it.” “I love it.” Nick grinned. “You guys are the best!” “I brought my dad’s old video protector. So we can set up a movie later.” Tao smiled. “That sounds great!” Nick agreed. “I’ll order pizza’s in a little bit.” Sarah smiled, stepping out on to the patio. Nick smiled at his mum. “You knew?” “Yup!” Sarah smirked. “We thought it would cheer you up, darling.” “It did, for sure.” Nick grinned as he gave his mum a quick hug before going back to enjoy the afternoon with his friends. It hadn’t been the camping trip they had spoken about for ages but they were all together, having fun and that was all that mattered.

Chapter Text

Sarah was absolutely beside herself as she sat in the waiting room of the hospital. Charlie was beside her, he looked just as terrified. Tonight was supposed to be special. Nick and Charlie had planned to go for dinner at a nice restaurant to celebrate their one year anniversary of being boyfriends. Sarah and Jane had already paid the restaurant a substantial amount of money and requested that the boys order as much as they want. They’d also thrown in a bottle of bubbly. Non alcoholic of course, just something nice for the boys to toast to. It wasn’t supposed to end like this.

🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂

Earlier that evening

Charlie had started to worry when Nick still hadn’t turned up to the bus stop 10 minutes after he had said he would. He was so excited about tonight, getting to celebrate with Nick in a proper grown up restaurant. His parents and Sarah had been so generous paying for the meal. He was sure that had been Sarah’s idea, but his parents had seemed happy to chip in. He decided to give Nick a ring, to find out what was taking so long. He dialled his number and listened as it rang and rang…..His concern grew bigger when Nick didn’t pick up his phone. It wasn’t like Nick. He always answered his phone. He wasn’t sure what to do. The bus they had planned to take approached and Charlie took a step back to let it pass by. Where was he? He had a weird feeling in the pit of his stomach. Charlie called Sarah, maybe Nick had been held up at home.
“Charlie, darling is everything ok? Are you both at the restaurant yet?” Charlie’s blood ran cold. Nick wasn’t home?
“Erm, I’m still at the bus stop waiting for Nick. I was wondering if he was running late?” There was a pause as he felt Sarah take in this information. “No darling, he left 20 minutes ago. He should be with you by now?” He heard her rustling as she put her coat on. “I’m just going to walk up your way, see if I can spot him anywhere. Ok? I’m sure he’s fine……”
“Ok, thanks Sarah.” Charlie hung up. He sat back down. Should he wait here? It made more sense to start walking towards Nicks home, meet Sarah in the middle. Maybe Nick had twisted his ankle or something….but he’d be answering his phone then….
Charlie started to speed walk along the pavement towards Nicks. There was no sign of him. He turned into the end of Nick’s road and his heart stopped. He would never forget turning into Nick’s street and the unsettling sight of an ambulance, police car, medic car and a crowd of people. It had to be a coincidence. It was nothing to do with Nick he told himself, although deep down he knew Nick would never leave him waiting at the bus stop without a good reason. That was until he saw a shoe, discarded on the side of the road only a few yards from where the crowd was currently surrounding the poor casualty. His heart sank and his eyes grew wide as he recognised the shoe to be a beaten up original black van. Nicks vans. He let out an involuntary scream as he picked up the pace and sprinted to the accident site. He was stopped from getting close by a police officer. “Woah, hold on there lad. I’m afraid you can’t come any closer.”
“Please,” Charlie shouted, “please, I think it’s my boyfriend…..please I need to see him.” The officer held him firmly. “Sorry I’m afraid I can’t allow it….”
“Nick!” Charlie screamed, he needed to be sure. He needed to see him, to make sure he was ok. “Charlie?” A shaky voice called for him. He leaned round the officer and saw Sarah stood at the side of the road, her face bone white, her eyes full of fear. “Let him through please, he’s family.” The officers nodded and gestured for Charlie to join her. He approached Sarah, he couldn’t see what was happening at first. Then he saw a sight that would be seared into his brain for all time. Nick. His beautiful, kind, wonderful Nick was laid at the side of the road. Though if he didn’t know it was Nick he wouldn’t have recognised him. There was blood everywhere. His face was covered with an oxygen mask, paramedics were congregated at his head where he had an obvious head injury. A doctor was there too, who had reached the accident before the ambulance and had been administering care while they waited. “Oh my god,” he whispered clinging to Sarah’s arm. “What happened?” Sarah didn’t take her eyes off Nick as she spoke. “He was hit by a car,” she cried, “it mounted the pavement and hit him from behind. That man over there witnessed it.” Charlie felt his world stop. Hit by a car? No, not Nick it wasn’t possible. “The driver didn’t stop….” Sarah continued, a hardness in her voice. “He drove away, left Nicky at the side of the road.” Charlie gasped. “They won’t let me hold his hand,” she broke down in tears. “I can’t hug my baby, he must be so scared.” Charlie felt tears stream down his face. This just didn’t make any sense. Sarah gripped his hand tightly as they watched the paramedics work on Nick. He was obviously unconscious. There was a sense of urgency from the medics. Charlie watched in horror as they expertly placed him on a spinal board, putting foam blocks around his head. He couldn’t get over how much blood there was. As they lifted him onto the stretcher, the ground beneath him was stained red. Sarah pushed her way past the police to be closer to Nick. “Nicky, baby? I’m here, mums here…..” the parademics manoeuvred the gurney into the ambulance. “I’m afraid we will need you to meet us there. We need the space in the back for the doctor. We will look after him, I promise.” Sarah clung to the side of the gurney. “Please let me sit with him?” She begged.
The paramedic gently pulled her away. “I know you want to be with him. But we need the doctor to travel back with us. We are worried about the head injury to your son. I promise we will take care of him. I’ll get the officer to follow behind. You can ride with them.”
Sarah nodded, and both her and Charlie were quickly sat in the back of the police car. They watched the ambulance door close and the lights begin to flash as it pulled away. The noise of the sirens cut through Charlie’s head. It didn’t feel real. He wasn’t sure what to think. He couldn’t quite believe that Nick was in the ambulance in front of them, being worked on by medics. He held tightly to Sarah’s hand as the police car followed behind the ambulance, at a very fast pace along the streets of Truham. They arrived at the hospital quickly and were out of the car following the paramedics into an and e. “I’m here Nicky,” Sarah called again, desperately hoping he could hear her. As they reached the accident and emergency waiting room their way was blocked. “If you could sign your person in here please someone will be along to see you.
Sarah couldn’t contain her frustration. She quickly told the receptionist Nicks details. “Please, he’s only 17, I need to be with him. He’ll be so frightened.” The receptionist was sympathetic but firm. “Please take a seat. Someone will be with you as soon as they can.”
Defeated, Sarah and Charlie sat down in the busy waiting room. After waiting about half an hour they were shown to a smaller, private room to wait. This made Charlie nervous. It was the sort of room people got bad news in. If it was going to be good news surely they’d be told in the main room with everyone else. He paced up and down the small room. How had their evening come to this? They’d been so excited. This just wasn’t fair.

Charlie snapped out of his trance as the door to the waiting room opened and in walked a doctor. He smiled softly, greeting them and sitting down in front of them.

“I have an update on Nicholas.”
Charlie sat down with a thump next to Sarah and grabbed her hand. “First off, he is alive, but his condition is critical. His left arm is severely broken…” the doctor explained. “It will require surgery to repair the bone..” that was the least of the concerns regarding Nick’s injuries though. The doctor pushed his glasses down the bridge of his nose and sat down, taking in a deep breath. “Nicholas has sustained a serious skull fracture and we are concerned about some swelling around the spinal cord.” Sarah gasped, her hand flying to her mouth as fresh tears began pooling around her eyes. Her baby. She’ll never forget the image of him laying there at the side of the road, unconscious and unmoving. The impact of the collision had been so powerful that he had lost a shoe. The scumbag who had been driving the car. The idiot who hit her son…just drove away. They knocked her boy down and just drove off, leaving him unconscious and injured.It filled her body with rage. How could someone do that??? “Is he going to be ok?” She asked. Nicky had head and spinal injuries. She was terrified.
“I can’t lie to you Ms Nelson, he’s in a critical condition. We have him sedated while we assess to see if surgery is needed. He may need an operation to reduce the swelling to his brain from the skull fracture…” Sarah paled, her grip on Charlie tightening. “And the spinal cord?” She didn’t want to ask but she needed to know. “Again, that needs time for us to monitor. “Will he be able to walk?”
The doctor gave her a sympathetic smile, “we just don’t know at the moment. We need to monitor him. But I can’t guarantee he’ll have full functionality of his limbs.we just need to let the swelling reduce first.”
Sarah closed her eyes. Charlie stared at the doctor in disbelief. “Can I see him?” She looked at the doctor, pleading, “please?”
The doctor nodded. Yes of course. I’ll take you to him now. He’s still here in a and e while we wait for a bed in icu to be prepared. If you follow me…..” Sarah and Charlie stood up. The doctor frowned, “I’m afraid it’s immediate family only, “ he said glancing at Charlie. “He’s family,” Sarah said for the second time that night. The doctor hesitated, “please, I need to see him,” Charlie’s voice trembled as he spoke. He gave a small nod, “ok, just for a few minutes before he’s taken up to icu.”
Sarah and Charlie followed the doctor along the corridor to the resus section of the department. “He’s heavily sedated, “ the doctor reminded them, “but talk to him. We don’t know what sedated patients can hear, but I like to assume they can hear us. Don’t be alarmed by all the monitors, they are all there so we can keep your son safe.”
Sarah nodded, gripping Charlie’s hand as they rounded the corner to where Nick was.
Sarah took a deep breath as she saw her baby for the first time since he arrived at the hospital. The nurses had tried to clean up some of the blood. The top of his head and forehead were covered in a thick white bandage. He still had the oxygen mask on so it was hard to see his face but there was obvious bruising. He had been changed into a hospital gown with a think blanket over top. There were wires and tubes everywhere. He had cannulas in both arms. His left arm was in a protective sling. Sarah glanced at the monitors, the reassuring sign of his heart beating steadily on the screen was surprisingly soothing. They approached the bed cautiously. Sarah gently stroked his good arm, “oh Nick sweetheart. It’s going to be ok. I promise. The doctors are going to look after you.” She stifled a sob as she stared down at him.
Charlie didn’t know how to process what he was seeing. Nick looked so poorly. So hurt. Right now they should be stuffed full of delicious food, walking back home to Nicks where they were having a sleepover. Not here in the hospital.
They had only been there a few moments when the porters arrived to take him up to intensive care. “Can we come with him?” Sarah asked the doctors who were busy attaching his monitors to the bed for transport. “It’ll take a little while to settle him. Why don’t you use this time to make any phone calls you need to, get yourself a coffee. We’ll look after him”

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Sarah hadn’t wanted to leave her son. It had taken a lot of persuading but she knew the doctors all had his best interest at heart. They had all been amazing since they’d arrived an hour ago. Charlie had guided her towards a coffee machine in one of the corridors, not too far from where they had been instructed to wait for any further news on Nick. Sarah slumped into a chair as Charlie thrust a cup of cheap hospital coffee in to her hands. His own hands shaking equally as much as hers. They were both in shock. “I need to call David..” Sarah spoke up as she fumbled with her phone. “I should let my mum know..” Charlie said quietly. For all Jane spring knew, Charlie and Nick were sitting in the posh restaurant together, enjoying their anniversary meal. Little did she know that was very much not the case. Sarah knew she had to let her parents know and of course Diane and Stèphane. She didn’t have much contact with her ex husband anymore unless it was anything concerning the boys. How was she supposed to break this to him?

Sarah made her calls. David was shocked to hear that his little brother had been in a serious accident. He was going to drive home from uni. It provided Sarah with some sense of comfort hearing David being so concerned about Nick. He did love and care his little brother really, he was just pretty bad at showing it. Charlie called his mum. He had barely been able to hold himself together as he recalled the evenings events to her. She assured him that she was on her way to the hospital.

*flashback*

Sarah slipped her shoes on and slipped out the front door, ignoring Nellie’s whimpering, who clearly assumed she was going out on a walk. Sarah walked down her drive. She couldn’t shift the unsettling feeling in the pit of her stomach. This was so unlike Nicky. Not to answer his phone. Not to turn up at the bus stop to meet Charlie right away. He’d left the house more than 20 minutes ago. He and Charlie should be well on their way to the restaurant by now. This just didn’t make any sense. The sight she saw when she turned on to the bottom of River Crescent would haunt her in her dreams forever. Something had happened. Something bad. She could feel it in her bones and she knew right away when she saw the crowd of people. She will never forget the look of horror that Mrs Jenkins who lives 3 doors down from her, shot her when she spotted Sarah. Her eyes wide. Her face pale. Sarah had instantly felt uneasy as she walked towards the crowd. What had happened and why did she feel a dull ache in her chest? She pushed through the crowd. There must have been at least 8 people crowded on the road. Sirens could be heard in the distance. She felt chills down her spine. Something bad had happened. Something very bad. “Oh Sarah..” She heard the voice of her neighbour Tim as he put a comforting hand on her shoulders. Sarah’s eyed widened as her gaze fell on to the cause of the commotion. There laid at the side of the road was Nicky. Her Nicky. Her baby. Sarah let out an almighty spine tingling wail as realisation hit. “The car just came from nowhere.” She heard a voice. “He wasn’t even on the road..” Sarah felt her legs buckle as she crumpled down, falling on to her knees beside her son. “Nicky?” He was unconscious. “NICK!” She shouted, firmly. No response. “What the hell happened?” She demanded, tears streaming down her face. “It wasn’t his fault.” Someone said. Sarah grimaced. She knew that. She knew for a fact that Nick didn’t do anything wrong. She had drummed road safety and awareness in to him as soon as he had been old enough to walk. It was then Sarah learned that Nick had just been walking along the pavement when a car sped around the corner. The driver was going more than double the speed-limit. They were all over the road and then mounted the pavement, crashing into Nick. The impact of the collision had thrown Nick over the bonnet of the car, he had practically lifted into the air, before crashing harshly on to the side of the road, losing a shoe in the process.

Sarah snapped out of her thoughts by the room opening and a police officer stepping inside. She and Charlie exchanged a glance. They knew the offer would be looking for a statement. The witness that had actually seen the incident occur had provided them with a witness statement at the scene but they were wanting to speak to Charlie and Sarah. This was serious. It was being treated as Hit and Run. The police were on a desperate mission to find the driver of the car that had struck Nick earlier in the evening. They would be reviewing all CCTV footage in the area. Sarah sat up straight as the officer introduced himself siting down. “Have you caught the driver yet?” Charlie asked. He couldn’t believe it when he learned that the driver of the car had just sped off. They knocked Nick down and just drove off as if it was nothing. They just let him for dead. How could someone do that to anyone. To Nick. To It disgusted him. “No..” The officer responded, honestly. “I assure you we have officers patrolling the area, we are in the process of receiving CCTV footage on River crescent. We are doing all we can to ensure the driver of that vehicle is found and detained.” “My son was on the pavement.” Sarah made sure the officers knew all the details. She wouldn’t allow this to be turned on Nick. He wasn’t even on the road. The doctor nodded. “The witness statements have confirmed that piece of information, Mrs Nelson…I assure you that we will do what we can to make sure your boy gets justice.” Sarah shot the officer a teary smile. He seemed nice. He probably had kids of his own. “He was on his way to meet his boyfriend. It’s their one year anniversary today.” Sarah told him as she took Charlie’s hand and squeezed it softly. The officer gave them a symphonic small. “How is he doing?” He asked hesitantly. “He’s still unconcious. They’ve just taken him up to the ICU..” Sarah sniffed. “They said the next 24 hours are critical..” She cried. “My son could die…”. The seriousness of the situation finally catching up.

It felt like forever had passed when a nurse finally entered the room and offered to take Sarah and Charlie up to intensive care. Given the seriousness of the situation only one person was permitted to be in the room at a time. “You go first. He needs his mum.” Charlie told Sarah. “Besides my mum should be here any minute..” Sarah hugged Charlie tightly. “Nick is so very lucky to have you in his life.” She told him sincerely before following the nurse in to the room.

“Please don’t be alarmed…the machines and tubes are all there to help your son.” The nurse explained. She stepped in to the room. Her eyes instantly falling on her son. “Oh Nicky…” she cried as she stepped closer to the bed, getting a proper look at her son. Both of his eyes were swollen shut, dark purple and blue rising circled his eyelids and under eyes. He had bruising along his forehead and down the side of his face. He still had cannulas in both hands and one in his forearm, carrying blood. There was machines flocking both sides of the bed. Several tubes and wires covered Nicky’s entire body. “I’m here darling, Mum’s here..” Sarah told him. She needed him to know that she was nearby. She hated the thought of him being frightened even though she knew he was heavily sedated. “You can hold his hand if you want.” The nurse told her softly. “Just be very careful of the IV’s.” Sarah didn’t hesitate at all as she reached out and very gently picked up Nick’s hand, giving it the mostly gentlest squeeze imaginable. “Can he hear me? If I talk to him?” She asked. She knew the doctor had mentioned earlier that it was a possibility. “We like to think coma patients are aware of what is going on around them.” The nurse replied as she adjusted some of the buttons on the machines. “It may come as a comfort to you just as much as Nick.” She urged. Sarah nodded with a smile as she sat down next to the bed, still gripping her son’s hand. “You just take all the time you need, baby.” She soothed. “I’ll be right here, my strong, brave boy.” “He really is a handsome lad.” The nurse smiled as she repositioned the heart rate monitor on Nick’s other hand. “Oh I know.” Sarah shot her a teary smile. She wasn’t biast in the slightest but her boy was gorgeous.

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Charlie flopped down on his bed. He was totally and utterly knackered, although he didn’t dare sleep. He couldn’t. He wouldn’t be able to anyway. Not whilst Nick was lying in hospital fighting for his life. It wasn’t fair. Nick was the kindest, purest soul ever. He didn’t deserve this. He was going to be okay. He had to be. He glanced to the side of his where his clock Was. 2:32am. He was surprised his mum had allowed him to stay at the hospital for so long. Jane had sensed how much Sarah needed the company. David wouldn’t be there for another couple of hours at least. Nicks auntie Diane arrived just after midnight. She’d driven the hour drive from her home in Southend after learning about her nephews accident. Charlie hadn’t wanted to leave the hospital. How could he leave Nick there but Sarah had insisted he gone home and at least tried to sleep. Fat chance of that happening. Tori had accompanied their mother to the hospital. She looked worried, upset. She liked Nick, she was forever telling her younger brother that he was one of the good ones. She couldn’t believe this had happened. Charlie pulled his phone out of his pocket. It was the first time he had really touched it since phoning his mum at the hospital to tell her what had happened. He couldn’t help but notice his Home Screen decorated in notifications, mainly from the Paris Squad group chat and mostly his friends wishing him and Nick a Happy Anniversary.

Tara: Happy 1 year anniversary as boyfriends Nick & Charlie 🫶🏼
Elle: Happy Anniversary boys❤️ can’t wait to hear the romantic gossip.
Tao: You will need to let me know if that restaurant is as good as everyone is making out it is 👀
Issac: Have the best time!!!
Darcy: Happy anniversary Nick and Charlie!😍 we love you guys!!!
Imogen: so sweet 🥺 enjoy your meal!
Sahar: Have the best time 🫶🏼

Charlie felt a lump in his throat as he read through the messages. How on earth was he supposed to break this to them? How was he supposed to tell their friends that Nick had been the victim of a hit and run and was now fighting for his life in hospital. They were going to be devastated. But Charlie knew that he had to tell them. It wouldn’t be fair for them to find out from someone else. They deserved to know as soon as possible. Charlie pulled himself in to a sitting position, leaning up against the headboard. He knew it was early hours of the morning, but he knew had to tell them.

Charlie: Hi guys. Thank you so much for your anniversary wishes. I would love more than anything to tell you that Nick & I had a fantastic evening, but that’s just not the case. Nick was involved in a hit and run earlier. Some idiot mounted the pavement as Nick was walking to meet me at the bus stop. They knocked him down and just sped off. Nick is in critical condition in the ICU. I’m so so sorry for the bluntness of this message. I just needed you guys to know what happened x

Charlie hit send and put his phone down on the side. It didn’t ping or buzz. Why would it. It was almost 3am. He knew his friends would be devastated when they read the messages though. He knew he should try and sleep. He promised Sarah that he would return to the hospital early tomorrow morning. Nick was having surgery to repair the broken bone in his arm, first thing in the morning. Charlie blinked as more tears ran down his face. How could the night have ended up like this? He rolled on to his side, reaching under his pillow and retrieving Kitty, his beloved childhood stuffy. He buried his face into the softness of kitty and let out a choked sob Just as he heard a soft tapping on his bedroom door. He didn’t respond, but the door opened anyway. Tori slowly walked towards her brother’s bed, steaming cup of tea in hand. She placed it on the side, didn’t say a ward, but perched herself on the edge of Charlie’s bed. Charlie acknowledged his sister’s presence, he just didn’t say anything as he cuddled kitty close to his chest. 5 minutes of silence between the siblings passed. “I don’t know what I’ll do if he dies.” Charlie said in a small voice. He didn’t want to think like that, but he had heard the doctor. Nick was in critical condition. The next 24 hours could be touch and go. The injuries Nick had sustained were very serious. Especially the head injury. Would Nick be brain damaged. Sustained serious spinal trauma. Would his beautiful Nick end up paralysed? It pained him to think about but he knew he had to consider the possibilities. “Nick isn’t doing to die.” Tori said firmly as she reached out and placed her hand on Charlie’s. “You don’t know that!” Charlie cried. “They just drove off and left him there.” He seethed. It filled him with so much anger that someone could do such a thing. “They’ll catch them Charlie. There is CCTV everywhere.” Tori assured him. “They will find them.” “Nick is going to be just fine. He’s strong. He’s a fighter.” She told him as she wrapped her arm around his shoulder. “What is he isn’t?” Charlie whispered. His heart aching at the possibility of a life without Nick. “He’s going to be fine.” Tori repeated. Charlie rested his head on his sister’s shoulder, with her beside him, he was able to drift off for a couple of hours well needed sleep. Nicks surgery was scheduled for first thing. It was a simple procedure and wouldn’t take anymore than a couple of hours.

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David stood in the doorway to his brother’s hospital room in intensive care. Something he never thought in a million years he would be doing. He was completely numb. After a frantic call from his mum he’d shoved some clothes in a duffel bag and hopped straight into his battered old car and driven down from Scotland. The whole journey had passed in a blur, his mind trying to comprehend what his mum had told him. Nick had been hit by a car, a hit and run. It was really bad. He hadn’t spoken to his mum since he left so to be directed up to ICU by the receptionist had shocked him. It was that bad?
Now, standing at the doorway he realised how serious it was. His mum hadn’t noticed him yet. She was sat as close to Nick as possible, her hand clutching one of his. She was gently stroking his cheek and murmuring something to him. David couldn’t hear what. He took in Nicks appearance, the bruises, the bandages, the wires and tubes. So many monitors. “mum?” He whispered, he didn’t want to startle her.
Sarah turned quickly, her eyes filling with tears once again as she saw her eldest son looking as white as a sheet in the doorway, his eyes fixed on Nick. She was out of her seat and pulling him into a hug in an instance, “I’m so glad you are here sweetheart,” she said, hugging him tight. “How is he doing?” David asked, pulling back to look once again at his unconscious brother.
Sarah sighed, “he’s hanging in there. He has a surgery soon for his arm. But they are worried about some swelling in his spine. And his skull fracture too….” She stifled a sob. David’s mind was whirling. Spinal injury? Jesus. They were interrupted by a nurse who had come to check on Nick. “Hello, you must be Nicks brother David?” She smiled kindly at him. “Um…yeah….hi,” David stammered back.
Sarah watched as she checked Nicks monitors and injected something into his IV. “Is it ok if David sits with me for a bit? He’s just got here from Scotland.” The nurse smiled as she finished up. “That’s fine, I’ll find you a second chair. Nick is on the list for surgery, there’s talk to taking him a bit earlier as we had to cancel someone else’s surgery. So it might be quite soon,”
Sarah thanked her and they put a chair on the opposite side of the bed for David to sit on. He stared at his little brother, “has he been awake at all?” He asked Sarah who shook her head. “No, he’s been unconscious since it happened. I think they have
him sedated too at the moment to help him recover. The doctor said to talk to him though, he might be able to hear you.” David pulled a face. He’d feel silly talking to Nick while he wasn’t awake. And would Nick even want to hear his voice? He might make it even worse! Sarah could see his reluctance, “please David,” he sighed. “Ok, fine.” He cleared his throat and looked at Nick, his eyes swollen shut, bruised a dark colour. “Hey Nicky,” he glanced at his mum who was smiling softly at him, “er, it’s David. I’ve driven all the way down from Scotland to see you, so the least you can do is wake up hey,” Sarah frowned, “Be nice David,” “I’m kidding!” He held his hands up in mock surrender. Truthfully he didn’t know how to talk to Nick in any way other than with sarcasm. They didn’t have a good relationship. He knew that was mostly his fault. His jealousy over his brothers sunny nature, his ability to make friends and his relationship with their mum. He knew it wasn’t a healthy sibling relationship. As he stared at nick, he was struck with the realisation that life is short. That he wanted to be a better big brother. Maybe he could step up. Help his mum and be there for Nick. He took a deep breath, “sorry Nicky. You need to get better ok? Nellie won’t be able to cope without you.” He paused, “none of us will.”
Sarah watched with tears in her eyes as David talked quietly to Nick. Telling him how much fun uni was and that he needed to get better so he could come and visit him in Scotland. Maybe something good would come out of this nightmare. Maybe the boys could mend their relationship. She was interrupted from her thoughts by two porters, a nurse and a doctor who appeared in a flurry of activity.
“We have an opening in theatre, so we are taking Nick down now,” the doctor explained as they began readying Nick and all his monitors. “Oh, ok. Um should we stay here?” Sarah asked, backing out of the way so the team could work.
“Best wait in the small family waiting room. We will come and get you when he’s done, it should be a fairly simple fix, a couple of hours maximum.” Sarah nodded. She gave Nick a kiss on the cheek, “sleep tight baby, I’ll be here when you are done.” She stroked his head one last time then nodded at the porters who unlocked the brakes and wheeled the bed out of the door. Sarah turned to David and her face crumpled. He hugged her tightly. “He’ll be ok mum.” He soothed.

The doctors brought Nick into the operating theatre. The team prepped him and began the surgery. The anaesthetist kept a close eye on his vitals which remained steady. He nodded at the surgeon, who picked up his scalpel and began.

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Sarah, David and Diane were in the small waiting room. Sarah was holding a cup of coffee in her trembling hands. David was laid across a couple of chairs resting his eyes. Diane was tapping on her phone, fielding questions from other family members. “It’s been 2 hours….” Sarah sighed. “He should be out by now.”
Diane squeezed her sisters thigh, “try not to worry. Maybe there was a delay getting started, or it’s a bit harder to fix. The doctor will come and see us soon.”
Sarah nodded and fixed her gaze back on the steam coming from her cup.

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“Ok,”the surgeon announced to the room, “I’m happy that we have the hardware in place. If everyone is happy, we can close this young man’s arm up and get him into recovery.” He looked over to the anaesthetist who checked his monitors and frowned. “His blood pressure is a little on the high side, but other than that we are all good. Yes, let’s get him out of here.” The surgeon began stitching up Nicks arm. Suddenly the machine at the head of the bed began to alarm, “blood pressure is far too high,” he said, “his heart rate is increasing,” the surgeon stopped stitching and examined the monitors. All of a sudden Nicks body began convulsing, his arms and legs twitching and jerking. “He’s seizing,” the doctor declared, “get me 10mills of phenobarbital stat.” He injected Nick and they waited for the medicine to take effect.
After a few moments his body began to calm. His arms and legs relaxing back into the bed. “Good lad,” the surgeon said. He was about to resume stitching so that they could get Nick back into icu when nicks heart monitor began to alarm. “He’s going into cardiac arrest,” the anaesthetist declared. The monitor continued to beep as Nicks heart stopped and his heart beat flatlined.

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Chapter Text

Sarah could barely focus on anything else. It has been over 3 and a half hours since Nick was taken into theatre. The doctor had assured her that it shouldn’t take any more than a couple of hours so why was it taking so long? Why did her insides feel like they were about to fall out? She felt helpless. Sitting here whilst her child was laying on an operating table. Diane and David would talk to her every now and then but she felt sick to her stomach with worry. She’d barely touched her coffee earlier. How could she when she didn’t know how Nick was? She’d updated Charlie via text message over an hour ago but she knew the younger boys nerves would be just as shattered as hers.

“Have you spoken to Charlie?” Diane asked. She was trying to keep her older sister talking, although she couldn’t even bear to imagine what Sarah was going through right now, she knew for a fact that if it was one of her kids that were in surgery, she would be exactly the same. “I messaged him a few hours ago. His mum is going to drop him off around lunchtime. Nicky should be done with surgery by then.”

Just as the sisters were in deep conversation, a swarm of doctors and nurses, dressed in scrubs rushed past the open waiting room. “Code blue, theatre 6!!” Sarah felt her blood run cold. No. If couldn’t be. It had to be a coincidence. She felt her body go numb as Diane gripped on to her hand. “It’s not Nicky. It’s not..” she kept repeating with a reassuring tone behind her voice.

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“1..2…3 clear…” the doctor announced as he placed the defibrillator on the teenagers chest. Nicks whole body jerked up with the shock of the machine. The surgeon checked for any sign of Nick breathing. He shook his head at his colleague. “Again.” He said as he looked down at the 17 year old kid on the operating table in front of him. What a waste. Nick still had his while life in front of him. “Come on kid.” The surgeon whispered as he warmed up the metal pads again and placed them on Nick’s chest and shocked him. He did this once more when suddenly the heart monitor sparkled in to life again. The doctor checked Nick’s pulse. “We’ve got him back.” He announced, glancing down at Nick. “Good lad.”
“His pulse is very weak, he is barely breathing. I want to intubate him now.” The anaesthetist left no room for argument as a flurry of activity began around Nick. The surgeon sighed. Placing this boy on a ventilator was the correct decision, but he knew it would be tough to get him off it again in the future. He waited as the crash team intubated Nick and placed him on a ventilator, hooking him up to the machine carefully. Once they were happy that his had stabilised they gave the surgeon the all clear to finish up. Nick’s arm was quickly stitched up and he was rushed for an emergency CT scan to detect the reason for the seizure. “He has as an acute subdural hematoma. We need to operate straight away.” the radiographer announced and with that Nick was whisked straight back in to the operating theatre.

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“I got you another coffee..” Diane said as she placed the cup down and sat next to her sister. David was sitting across for them, his head leaning back in the chair as he had dozed off. No surprise after driving 5 hours from Glasgow. Sarah glanced up at her sister. “It’s been over 5 hours now Di…what is going on?” She said getting to her feet. “I need to ask someone.” “Sarah they said they’d fetch us with an update..”. “They also said it would take no more than a couple of hours.” Sarah snapped back unintentionally, immediately adapting a softer tone. “I’m sorry…my nerves are just shattered.” She apologised. She was just all over the place. Diane instantly reached out and grabbed her sisters hand, giving it a tight squeeze. “He’s going to be just fine.” She tried to assure her just as much as herself. “They’ve probably just realised his arm is broken more seriously than they initially thought.” “Yeah, you’re probably right.” Sarah nodded, although she couldn’t help the little niggle in her head and the gripping feeling of worry in the pit of her stomach that the earlier commotion had something to do with Nicky. No. She couldn’t think like that. Diane was right. There had to be an innocent explanation as to why Nick’s operation was taking longer than expected.

Charlie entered the main reception of the hospital. Jane had insisted on coming inside with him for moral support and also to extend a comforting hand to Sarah. Tori was also there. Charlie confidently led his mother and sister towards the waiting area on the icu. Nick’s surgery was scheduled for 8am. It was now almost 2pm. Nick should be well out of theatre, he should probably be out of recovery and back in his room by now. Charlie smiled at the nurse that he recognised from last night, he noticed the sympathetic smile that she shot him but he didn’t think much of it. Charlie led them to just outside the room that Nick had been occupying last night but his face fell when he realised his boyfriend wasn’t there. Surely he wasn’t still in recovery? “Charlie…” he quickly spun around to see Sarah coming out of one of the restrooms. She looked pale as a ghost and her eyes were red and puffy as if she had been non stop crying. “Sarah? Where’s Nick??” She asked. “He’s still in surgery, darling.” Sarah said softly as she crossed the hall and pulled him in for a hug. She then retreated and did the same to Jane and Tori, thanking them for being there. Charlie’s eyes widened. “I thought his operation was at 8am. Did it get postponed?” He asked confused. Nick was only having surgery on his broken arm. Surely that didn’t require 6 hours?? Sarah sighed as she took Charlie’s hand in hers, giving it a gentle squeeze. “He actually went down a little earlier than that…. he’s still in theatre.” She didn’t understand it herself. It wasn’t making sense. She needed someone to inform her of what was going on soon before she began to lose her mind. “Hopefully it shouldn’t be much longer..”.

Dr Roschild, the doctor undertaking Nick’s care paused outside the relative room on the ICU. He took a heavy breath before knocking on the door and entered. He was surprised to see so many people there waiting. “Are you all here for Nicholas Nelson?” He asked. Sarah stood up immediately. “How is he?” She asked desperately. “Maybe we should chat outside?” Dr roschild suggested. “We’re all family here.” Sarah replied glancing at Charlie, Jane and Tori with a wobbly smile. “Anything you tell me, you can tell us all..” she just needed to know how Nick was and why things had taken so long. The doctor nodded and sat down, gesturing for Sarah to do the same, which she did. “I apologise for the wait…we…uh…we came by some complications during surgery…” “What kind of complications?” Sarah asked. Her eyes widened. “Nick suffered a seizure during the surgery to correct the broken bone in his arm.” Sarah gasped. “A seizure?? Why?” “I believe it was caused by a serious increase in high blood pressure. They managed to control the seizure with phenobarbital, an anti-seizure drug..” Dr Roschild continued to explain. “However, Nicholas’ condition unfortunately began to decline and he went in to cardiac arrest.” Sarah’s eyes widened in shock. Cardiac arrest. The swarm of medical professionals that rushed past earlier. They had been rushing to deal with her son. “Nick’s heart stopped..”. Sarah felt her legs turn to jelly as she fell back in to her chair. “No.” She cried. “We managed to resuscitate Nick after a few moments.” Sarah could feel the room spinning. She couldn’t quite believe what she was hearing. Nick had flatlined. He’d stopped breathing. His heart had stopped. He’d died, only for a few minutes, but he’d died. “After this, the team were concerned about how hard he was finding it to breathe, it was decided to place him on a ventilator.” He paused,as Sarahs face went an even paler shade and she put her hand to her mouth. With fast instincts, he immediately grabbed the bin from the corner of the room and held it under her as she vomited the weak coffee she’d been nursing.” Sarah felt Diane rubbing her back gently, “it’s ok Sarah, just breathe for me, ok?” Eventually Sarah stopped heaving and collapsed back into her seat. “I’m sorry…” she gasped out. “Please carry on…”

The doctor handed the bin over to a passing nursed and then sat himself down next to Sarah, taking her hand gently as he spoke. “Following a CT scan we discovered that Nick had suffered an acute subdural hematoma.” “What does that mean?” Diane asked as she gripped her sister’s other hand. “It’s a bleed on the brain that occurs when blood accumulates between the brain and surface of the skull. We have had to perform an emergency craniotomy to prevent any further pressure on the brain.” “A crainy-what?” David asked, speaking up from the corner of the room. He didn’t understand any of the medical jargon but that sounded serious. Brain surgery. His little brother he needed brain surgery after he flatlined in theatre? This was like a horrible nightmare that he needed to wake up from. “A craniotomy…” the doctor repeated. “A procedure where we remove part of the skull in order to drain a build up of cerebrospinal fluid or in Nick’s case blood in order to try and reduce the swelling and pressure on the brain.” David’s eyes widened. Charlie felt numb. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Nick. His beautiful Nick. He felt Tori reached out and squeeze his hand but he couldn’t move he just felt frozen. “Is my son going to die?” Sarah said suddenly. She just had to know. The doctor pushed his glasses down on the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath. “Nicholas is a very poorly young man.” He started. “We are doing everything we can for him but I must warn you the next 48 hours are critical.” Sarah blinked back tears as Diane tightened her grip on her hand. This was the kind of things you watch on casualty. You don’t imagine ever being in this situation, being told that there is a chance your child could die. “What is his survival rate?” Sarah asked quietly. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to hear it. “It’s hard to say…” “Please!!” Sarah begged. “Right now I’d say about 50%..”. Sarah let out a choked sob. “We have moved Nicholas to level 3 critical care, where he will receive the most advanced, comprehensive care and around the clock monitoring. I’m afraid he is in a coma.” “Can I see him?” Sarah asked, desperate to see her son, sit by him and tell him that everything was going to be okay. The doctor nodded. “Of course. I can take you there now. I’m afraid I can only permit two people to visit at a time giving the severity of Nick’s condition.” Sarah nodded. Charlie wanted to leap up and go with Sarah but he knew Nick’s Auntie and even David had more right to visit. They were family. Diane glanced at her eldest nephew. “You go with your mum, sweetheart.” She said as much as she wanted to see her nephew. David shook his head before glancing over at Charlie. “Charlie should go…” he said quietly, shocking everyone in the room. Charlie’s eyes widened. “I…you should go..”. David shook his head. “Nick will want you there.” He said. He knew his little brother. He knew how much he would want Charlie by his side. “Come on darling..” Sarah gave him a teary smile as she extended out her hand. Charlie stood up, taking Sarah’s hand as they followed the doctor out of the room towards Nick’s new ICU room.

Sarah and charlie entered the room. Nick was laying flat on his back. A thick white bandage was wrapped around his head from the craniotomy procedure. The bruises around his eyes looked darker and more prominent. Charlie stifled a sob as he looked at the ventilator Nick was now attached to. He was hooked up to other tubes and wires, every visible part of his body was hooked up to some sort of wire or monitor. He had IV cannulas in, his left arm in a cast up to the elbow, a catheter snaked its way under the blanket that was tucked in at his waist. “Oh baby…” Sarah said collapsing into the chair beside her son’s bedside. “Mums here. I’m here sweetheart.” She soothed. The nurse that was adjusting some of the monitors smiled kindly at her. “You can hold his hand if you want…just be careful of the IV’s..” Sarah nodded as she gently reached out and picked Nick’s unbroken hand up, stroking it softly. “My brave boy..” she muttered as she lifted his knuckles to her lips and placed a soft kiss on them. Charlie hovered in the corner. They moved another chair over towards the bed. “Sit down, love.” She smiled. Charlie sat down, but he couldn’t take his eyes off of Nick. He looked so vulnerable, so broken. He still couldn’t believe this had happened. On their anniversary. It was supposed to be a happy time and now Nick was laying there fighting for his life.

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David entered his brothers hospital room on the intensive care unit. This was now part of his daily routine. Wake up, walk Nellie, put Nellie’s food out, drive to the hospital via Starbucks to pick Sarah up some proper coffee as the hospital coffee wasn’t very good. He’d then make his way on to the ICU, greeting the same doctors and nurses that were constantly monitoring his little brother. Nick’s condition remained the same. It had now been 8 days since the accident. He hated that expression. This was no accident. Nick had been hit by a car and then left alone on the side of the road whilst the driver sped off. Luckily they had caught the bastard. It would have been hard for them not to have caught up with the driver with the amount of CCTV recovered from the area. 3 times over the drink limit. That moron had gotten behind the wheel absolutely smashed, knocked Nick down and then just drove away, didn’t have the decency to even stop and check that Nick was okay. He evidently was not ok. It angered David how someone had done this and just drove away, but at least the police had caught up with him now. He would pay for this.

“Morning…” David greeted Sarah with a smile, extending out a grande extra shot latte. Sarah smiled tiredly at her eldest. “Hi sweetheart.” She said taking a sip of the hot drink before sitting it on the side. “You look exhausted mum.” David commented as he took a proper look at Sarah’s face. Her eyes had dark bags under them and looked sunken, her skin was pale and her hair was slicked back, evidently in dire need of a wash. She’d barely left Nick’s side. She had gone home once since it happened, a few days ago as Diane and David had practically forced her to go home and get her head down. She’d only been gone for a few hours though before coming straight back to continue her bedside vigil at her baby’s side. She couldn’t bear to be away from Nicky for any length of time. “I’m fine, David.” Sarah replied stubbornly. “How’s Nellie girl?” She asked, clearly changing the subject. “She’s missing Nick…” David sighed. He could tell. Nellie wasn’t her self. She missed Nick and Sarah. She was a clever dog. She could tell something had happened. “I brought you those clothes you asked for.” He said as he sat the duffel back down at his feet. Sarah had requested David bring her a change of clothes as the nurses had said that she was welcome to use one of the staff washrooms to freshen up. That way she wouldn’t have to leave Nick’s side for too long. “Thank you, darling.” Sarah smiled softly as she gave Nick’s hand a gentle squeeze and kissed his knuckles. “Your brother is here to see you baby.” She whispered. David flopped down on the chair at the opposite of the bed. “Hey Nicky…” He then glanced at his mum. “No change then?” He asked in a hopeful tone. Everyone was desperate for some sort of eye twitch or finger flinch from Nick, but there had been nothing. Nick’s condition has remained the same. Steady, but critical. It hadn’t deteriorated, however it hasn’t improved either. Sarah shook her head, sadly. “He just needs more time.” She said. She knew her baby would come back to her when she was ready. David on the other hand had serious doubts. The longer that time went on without any sign of life from Nick. The more that he feared his little brother wasn’t going to recover from this. “Have you heard from dad yet?” David asked. Sarah shook her head. “I’ve left several voicemails.” “I’ll try calling him later.” David said. “He should be here.” It angered him that his father hadn’t showed up yet. His youngest son was fighting for his life in a coma. Why wasn’t he here? David reached into the bag and pulled out a tatty teddy bear. Sarah’s glanced up a smile forming on her lips. “You found binky.” David rolled his eyes. “I didn’t have to look hard. He had him stuffed under his pillow.” David used to tease Nick relentlessly about the fact he still slept with a teddy bear even when he was far too old for it. In David’s opinion. Even when Nick went to secondary school. He didn’t have the heart to part from his believed childhood teddy. So he just kept it hidden instead whenever his mates were over. It wasn’t until he discovered that Charlie still slept with a stuffy that he didn’t feel so ashamed. Sarah smiled at he boys as she stood up. “I’m going to freshen up call me if anything changes.” She told David. David nodded and watched as Sarah grabbed her clothes and made her way out of the room. He turned his attention back to his younger brother. He carefully tucked the battered teddy bear under Nick’s arm and let out a shaky sigh. Tears brimming his eyes and threatening to fall. He hesitated for a moment before reaching out and carefully taking Nick’s hand in to his. “Please get better Nicky…” he croaked out as he gripped on to his hand. “I’m so sorry that I’ve been a crap big brother.” He said as tears streamed down his face. “I promise I will do better. Please….please just wake up..” little did he knew Sarah had paused at the door and heard the conversation. She blinked back tears before walking off.

Charlie stood in front of his mirror, tying his tie with a loud sigh. His parents had let him stay home since the accident, but they were now insisting he go back to school. Nobody knew when, or even if, Nick was going to wake up and they knew that Charlie needed to go back to some sort of routine. He couldn’t just stay at home or at the hospital. Charlie had begged for longer. It felt like people were starting to give up on Nick. Charlie refused to do so, Nick would wake up when he was ready. He had to believe that he was still in there somewhere. He had visited every day, holding his hand and whispering to him how loved he was and how much he needed to open his eyes and come back to him. The doctors had the same speech every time they came to check on him. ‘Critical condition’. they just had to wait to see if Nick was going to wake up. There had been talk of seeing if they could wean him off the ventilator but so far his doctors had said that he wasn’t ready. They’d explained they needed to be confident he would breathe unaided because apparently reintubating was extremely risky. Charlie’s phone buzzed on his bed and he reached over to grab it, smiling softly at the messages from his friends.

Darcy: Charlie bear! Can’t wait to see you later 💖💖💖
Tao: I’m walking you in today, a temporary replacement for Nick. I’ll be at yours in ten.
Elle: love you Charlie, you’ve got this
Tara: Any update from the hospital?

Charlie sat down on his bed as he typed out a quick reply.
‘Thanks Tao. I’m nearly ready.
No update Tara. Hopefully Sarah managed to get some sleep and will text me when she wakes up. ‘

He grabbed his bag and made his way downstairs where Jane was at the breakfast table. “Morning Charlie, how are you feeling about today?” To give her credit he could see from her face that his mum felt guilty about sending him back to school. He knew deep down that she had a point but he was still pissed off about it. “Crap,” he said bluntly, noting her wince at his tone. “I want to spend the day with Nick.”
Jane sighed. God being a mum was hard, she didn’t have a clue what she was doing really, just trying to do the right thing. She knew how much Charlie wanted to be at the hospital, but she had a horrible churning feeling in the pit of her stomach that they weren’t going to get the positive outcome everyone was praying for. And Charlie needed to be careful, he’d worked so hard to improve his mental health and his eating, she couldn’t just let him slip back into not taking care of himself. She decided not to rise to his bait this morning, simply saying, “I’m sure you do.” She handed him a coffee and protein bar, knowing he wouldn’t be hungry, and squeezed his arm as she left the kitchen. “I love you Charlie, I’ll take you to the hospital straight from school ok? Promise.” He gave her a small nod and she left him to it, going to get ready for work as the doorbell went. Charlie downed the coffee and put the bar in his blazer pocket before stuffing his feet in his shoes and answering the door to Tao, who immediately pulled him into a hug. “It’s good to have you back at school,” he said softly, “I know you don’t want to be there. We will try and take your mind off everything ok?”
Charlie bristled, “I don’t want to take my mind off Nick.” He snapped, “I want to think about him. I want to be with him, to hold his hand and talk to him…..”
“Shit, yeah I didn’t mean it like that…..”Tao stammered. He was always so shit with words. He wished Isaac was here. He’d say the right thing. “Sorry…..” he whispered. Charlie felt a stab of guilt. He wasn’t cross with Tao, who was trying his best….”no, I’m sorry I snapped.” He said, “I just really don’t want to go back to school. Everyone is going to be asking me about Nick, staring at me like some kind of freak aren’t they.” He looked at Tao for confirmation who just winced at him, “yeah I thought so, “ Charlie sighed. He closed the front door and they began walking to school. His phone pinged with Sarah’s notification. He’d set his phone to alert him whenever she called or messaged so he didn’t miss any updates,
Sarah: morning darling. No change. Nick had a peaceful night. Good luck at school today and we will see you later. I promise I’ll message you if any news.

He clicked off his phone and angrily put it in his pocket. “No change.” He said. Tao looked at him compassionately. “I’m sorry…..want to talk or want a distraction?”
“Um, distraction please.” Tao grinned. “Excellent! So let me tell you all about the latest drama in the film club at school. Meg Walker had the audacity to do a presentation on the short comings of Donnie Darko as a film and how Mama Mia was better directed. Can you imagine? I was livid, Charlie. Livid!” Charlie half listened as Tao went into graphic detail as to why Meg was mistaken and they were at school before he knew it.

As he has expected he was bombarded with questions about Nick from the second he arrived at school. Mostly from people who genuinely seemed to care and want to know how he was doing. But also from kids who just wanted gossip. They asked him invasive questions about nicks injuries “is it true he’s basically a vegetable now? Is he really on life support? I heard his brains splattered on the ground.” Charlie lost his cool at that and had to be physically restrained from punching the year 8 boy. He got through the day by gritting his teeth and by hiding in the art room at every break time.
He was thrilled when the final bell went and he sped out of school to wait for his mum to arrive. The sooner he got to the hospital the better. He was surprised to see Tara nervously approaching him as he waited. She greeted him with a hug and a sad smile. “How’s today been?” She asked sympathetically. Charlie sighed. “Fucking awful.”she giggled quietly at that. “Yeah I can imagine. Um… listen,” she hesitated. Charlie looked at her curiously. “Um, I was wondering if I could visit Nick?” She bit her lip self consciously as she rambled, “I know he’s not awake for anything and I do understand if his mum doesn’t want me to, but I’d really like to see him…..I really love him too you know?” Charlie’s heart softened. He squeezed her hand, “honestly? I’m not sure what his family will say. I can ask though?” Tara smiled back, “thanks Charlie.” They were interrupted by Jane pulling up in the Springs little yellow car. “Text the group later yeah? Give us an update?”
Charlie hugged her tightly, “course I will.” He climbed into the passenger seat and waved to Tara as they drove towards the hospital. “How did it go?” Jane asked, eyes concentrating on the school run traffic, Charlie shrugged. “It went.” He replied. He leaned forward and switched on the radio, ending the conversation. He didn’t have the energy for his mum right now. He knew that was unreasonable, but if you can’t be unreasonable when your boyfriend is on a ventilator in a coma, then quite honestly when can you?

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The following day Tara was waiting nervously for Charlie outside Truham. Sarah had been initially reluctant, worried about people seeing Nick so poorly, unsure if Nick would want to have visitors in his condition. Charlie, and Diane, had persuaded her that the more people who come and talk to Nick, the more chance there might be of him hearing them. Charlie reassured her that Tara was a genuine friend. Eventually Sarah had spoken to the doctors who had agreed with Charlie and Diane that it couldn’t hurt and that it might well help for Nick to be exposed to different friends and family.

Charlie walked up to her as she leaned against the fence, doom scrolling on her phone. “Hey,” he said causing her to jump. She pocketed her phone, “ hi Charlie,” she looked apprehensive . Charlie took her arm. “My mum is over there,” he said pointing at his parents car as his mum tapped her hands impatiently on the steering wheel “come on, let’s go see Nick.” Tara gave him a small nod and followed, slipping into the back seat of the car. “Thanks for the lift mrs spring, “she said politely. Jane smiled at her in the mirror, “not at all, it’ll be nice for Charlie to have some company there.”
The journey to the hospital didn’t take long and Jane pulled up outside the main entrance, “Charlie I’ll pick you up at 8pm ok? You need to come home and do your homework. I’ll save you some dinner.” Charlie nodded, “Yep ok see you later,” he led Tara inside the hospital and up to the intensive care floor. “Sarah has added your name to the visitor list so it should be straightforward to get you in,” he buzzed the door and listened for the click as it unlocked. Tara followed him to the small reception desk. “Hello Charlie,” the nurse at the desk smiled at him. Nick and his family were well known by now on this floor. The nurses all had a soft spot for Charlie. “And who is this?” She smiled at Tara. “Oh, I’m Tara, a friend of nicks. His mum said I could visit?” Nurse Emma looked at nicks information. “Tara Jones? Yep, got you right here. You can take her through Charlie love. Just buzz if you need anything ok?”
Charlie smiled, “thanks Emma. How’s he been today?” Her smile softened slightly, “no change love.” Charlie sighed. He was sick of hearing those words.
Charlie took the familiar walk to nicks room. He stopped at the doorway and turned to Tara who looked extremely tense. “Like I said, he’s hooked up to a lot of different wires and tubes. It took me a while to get used to them. It’s a lot to take in.” Tara nodded and Charlie led her into the room.
Tara took one look at the sight in front of her and burst into tears. Sarah, who was sitting by Nick holding his hand as always, was out of her chair and hugging her tight in an instant. “Shhh, it’s ok. Please don’t cry,” she rubbed her back as Tara’s wide eyes stared at Nick. “I’m sorry,” she stammered, I thought I was prepared….but i guess I wasn’t.” Sarah sighed, “no dear, none of us were.” She pulled back from the hug to study Tara’s teary face. “Are you going to be ok in here? I understand if it’s too much.”
“I’m fine,” Tara said wiping her face with the back of her hand. “It was just a shock.” She gave Charlie a small watery smile before carefully walking over to the bed where Nick was. She took in the sight in front of her. The loud ventilator, the tubes snaking from Nick to different machines. The wires, the beeps, the different monitors. Then she looked at Nick himself. He looked so unwell. His head was bandaged, his face was so bruised. The tube sticking out of his mouth looked so unnatural. She watched his chest rising and falling rhythmically in time with the machine. Tentatively she reached out and laid her hand gently on his chest. “I’m going to go and get a coffee and have a bit of a freshen up Charlie, do you two want anything?” Charlie shook his head and took his seat on the other side to Tara as Sarah left the room quietly. “Hey baby,” Charlie said, leaning forward to kiss Nick gently on the cheek. “School was so boring without you. I think it’s time you woke up to save me from the misery of form by myself hmm?” He gripped Nicks good arm and stroked his wrist carefully. Tara sat down in the other chair. “Tara has come to see you babe,” Charlie said softly, “she’s right here if you want to wake up and talk to her?” He looked half hoping, though knowing it was highly unlikely he’d suddenly awaken. “Say hello Tara, tell him about your day?”
Tara took a deep breath, a tear trickled down her cheek as she spoke, “ hey Nick, I wanted to come by and see you. I’ve missed you so much.” Charlie looked at her reassuringly, “um, Darcy says hi, she really wanted to come too but we thought she might cause a bit too much chaos!” Tara placed her trembling hand on nicks arm. “We are all so worried about you Nick. Please wake up.”
Tara stayed for an hour, she found she got used to talking to Nick. Not expecting an answer obviously but it felt like he was listening. Her and Charlie made each other laugh filling Nick in on all the highs and lows of Truham and Higgs over the past few days. Sarah returned, her hair slightly damp from the shower and a large coffee in her hand. Her heart swelled as she stood in the doorway watching the two teenagers including Nick in their conversation. She was glad she’d agreed to this. “Ok you two?” Tara and Charlie looked over to her. “Thank you for letting me visit, my mum is downstairs so I’ll get out of your hair.” She leant over to Nick and whispered in his ear, “I’ll come and see you again soon. Maybe you could be awake for me? “ she kissed his cheek and looked at Charlie. “See you tomorrow. Thanks for this.”
“Thanks for coming.” Charlie gave her a hug as she left. Sarah slipped straight into the spare seat and held nicks hand once more. “I’m back sweetheart,” she said gently.

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4 weeks. Sarah could hardly believe that this was her life now. It had been four weeks since her life as she knew it ended and her nightmare began. Four weeks of living in the hospital. A month since Nick had last opened his eyes, spoken, breathed on his own. She stretched in her chair and cracked her back. “I think I’m going need to see my chiropractor when all this is over,” she joked to Nick. He was still in the same position. The doctors had removed the large bandage around his head and it was replaced with a smaller one. She could see the area of his hair that had been shaved for the surgery. Nick was not going to be happy about that when he woke up. And he was going to wake up. He just had to. Other than that and a yellowing of his bruises, Nick looked exactly as he did when he arrived.
Charlie tapped gently on the doorframe. Still dressed in his school uniform. Sarah checked the time. “Gosh Nicky it’s 4 already, Charlie is here for you darling.” David looked up from his phone, seeing Charlie hovering awkwardly in the doorway. “I’m going to meet Autie Di in the canteen for a bit if you want to sit here?”
“Thanks David.” Charlie found it hard knowing how to be around David. He’d been so good to Sarah since the accident, but Charlie wasn’t ready to let his guard down just yet. “Ok sweetheart, see you later. Hi Charlie,” she smiled as Charlie took up his usual spot on the other side of the bed.

A knock at the door interrupted them a while later. Sarah glanced up to see nicks doctor in the doorway. “Mrs Nelson, we’d like to take Nick for another scan, see if there’s any improvement, or any reason why he’s not waking up yet. The porters are on their way.”
“Ok, thank you,” Sarah leaned close to Nick. “Come on sweetheart show those doctors you are ready to wake up.”
Charlie and Sarah watched as the nurses unhooked Nick from various machines and arranged for the portable ventilator to take him over to CT. He was gone for around half an hour, returning with the doctor. “Can we have a chat?” He looked at Sarah who paled. “Um yes. Here?” Doctor Adam’s hesitated, “do you have any other family here with you?” Charlie’s heart plummeted. This did not sound good. “My sister is in the canteen with Nicks brother……” the doctor nodded, “why don’t you round them up and I’ll meet you in the family room.”
Sarah phoned her sister in a daze. It felt like she was watching herself go through the motions. Her mind kept replaying the doctors words. Why did she need her family? What was happening. The Nelson’s gathered in the family room along with Charlie who was white with worry.
Dr Adam’s joined them and sat in the chair next to Sarah. “So we have rescanned Nicks head to check for any changes in brain activity, swelling, to see if maybe we can look to remove the ventilator and try Nick breathing on his own….” He cleared his throat, “I’m afraid there hasn’t been any improvement in nicks condition. He is showing minimal brain activity. There is still a lot of swelling around his brain.”
Sarah grasped her sisters hand, “what does that mean?” She whispered. Dr Adam’s looked at her soberly, “our concern is that we will not be able to take Nick off the ventilator. I want you to prepare yourself as a family that it might be you need to make a decision about whether you want to keep Nick on the ventilator…..or…..”
“Or what?” David hissed, his eyes wide with horror, “or if you want to let him go.” The doctor finished.
The room sat in stunned silence as they processed the doctors words. Charlie let out a sob and clapped his hand over his mouth. Switch off the ventilator? “You can’t,” he shrieked, “you can’t give up on him.” His voice was higher than normal, he could feel himself spiralling into panic. Sarah took his hand and looked to the doctor with a fire in her eyes, “I will not give up on my son,” she seethed. “He just needs more time.”
Dr Adam’s nodded compassionately. These sorts of conversations were the hardest part of his job. He knew families needed time to come to terms with these sorts of things. “I understand mrs Nelson, we don’t need to make any decisions today. But I do need to stress to you. We can’t keep him ventilated for ever with little brain activity. I wouldn’t be doing my job if I didn’t keep you appraised of the situation.” He looked around the room at the furious and devastated faces in front of him. “I’ll leave you to process for a bit. We can chat more in a few days…”
He excused himself from the room and closed the door.
“We can’t give up on him,” Charlie looked pleasingly at Sarah. “We just can’t.”
“We won’t sweetheart,” Sarah hugged Charlie as he cried, her own tears staining his school shirt. How had it come to this? What would they do if Nick didn’t wake up soon? He was running out of time.

Chapter Text

Sarah put the book down and let out a tired sigh. She’d started reading to Nick a few weeks ago. She’d gone through countless of his favourite books as a child. She didn’t even know if Nick could hear her but it provided her with some comfort. “When are you going to open those eyes, eh?” She said reaching out her thumb to stroke his cheek. When was her son going to come back to her? It has been 2 days since the doctor sat here down and told her that Nick’s condition hasn’t shown much improvement over the last four weeks and maybe she should consider making the decision to turn off his life support and allow him to pass away peacefully. How could she even consider doing that? How could she make the decision to kill her child. That’s what she would be doing, wouldn’t it? Nicky was still alive. Not conscious, but alive. She couldn’t give her consent to that. She just couldn’t. “Nellie misses you so much, darling.” She said as she took his hand in hers. “We all miss you..”. This just wasn’t right. She shouldn’t be sat here whilst her 17 year old son lay in a coma, where he had been the last month. It wasn’t fair. The doctor had suggested removing the breathing aids and allowing Nick to slip away, rallying up the rest of the family, to say goodbye. She didn’t want to say goodbye. She couldn’t say goodbye. She didn’t want to even have to consider thinking about planning a funeral for Nicky. She wouldn’t give up on him. She was his mother and he was her son. They were going to get through this.

“You got some more cards, sweetheart.” Sarah said as one by one she opened up the cards, reading them out loud to Nicky. Each one a get well soon wish and silent prayer for her son. The side table and a large portion of the wall in Nick’s hospital room were decorated in cards. “Here’s one from Coach Singh, all of the rugby boys have signed it.” Sarah said as she put some blue tac on the back of it and popped it up on the wall. “Even Harry Greene.” Sarah spent every moment by her son’s bed, only leaving for short intervals to freshen up or grab a drink or snack. Her sister and brother in law had moved in to her house, along with their eight year old twins. It just had made more sense. Diane wanted to be close to the hospital and it meant she was there to look after Nellie whilst David was at the hospital our out. Diane hadn’t hesitated about pulling the kids out of school. She needed to be close to her sister. David said he’d would eventually need to go back to university. It had been over 4 weeks. His uni had been great for the first few weeks but now he was in a predicament of failing his course if he didn’t return soon. It was a tough situation. He’d worked so hard for nearly two years but he needed to be at home to support his mother whilst his little brother was so gravely unwell. Sarah hung up the last of the cards. One from an old childhood friend who lived in Ireland. They still kept in close contact and she had been incredibly devastated to hear of Nick’s accident. She then sat back down and took Nick’s hand as she gently hummed the tune of. You are my sunshine. “Please don’t take my sunshine away..” She whispered as she tightly squeezed Nick’s hand as she placed a kiss on his knuckles. Tears rolling freely down her cheek.

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Charlie stuffed his Pyjamas and a spare set of clothes in to his overnight bag. This didn’t feel right. Having a Paris Squad sleepover without nick, but Tao was throwing a movie marathon and Jane had suggested that it would be a good idea for Charlie to attend. Tori had even agreed with her mother for a change, stating that it might do him the world of good to have some fun with his friends. “How am I supposed to have fun without Nick?” Had been Charlie’s initial reaction but after thinking it over he thought it wasn’t actually a bad idea. Nick would want him to go and he knew it would mean the world to his friends if he showed up. “Ready to go Charlie?” Julio spring asked as he popped his head around his son’s bedroom door. He knew the past month had been incredibly hard on his 16 year old son. Having to deal with visiting his critical boyfriend in intensive care. He had worried that the whole ordeal would have a negative effect on Charlie’s mental health, but his son has amazed him with how brave and grown up he had been about the whole situation. Julio was very fond of Nick. He was a good lad and it was evident that he only had Charlie’s best interest at heart, so the whole situation had been very upsetting. He just hoped Nick pulled through, for everyone’s sake. “Yeah dad, I’m ready!” Charlie smiled as he slung his backpack over his shoulder and grabbed his sleeping bag from on top of the bed.

“Charlie!!” Tara and Dairy both squealed as they engulfed the curly haired boy in a bone crushing hug. “I’m so glad you decided to come..” Tara smiled. She had been worried when she had learnt that Charlie had been debating whether to one or not that he would change his mind and decide against it. Charlie smiled at them both. “Nick would want me to come..” He said shakily. This was in no way him allowing himself to be distracted or forget about Nick. He would be straight back up at the hospital tomorrow to visit his boyfriend and tell him all about the sleepover but he had realised he, himself needed a night off. Just to breathe, just to be Charlie again. “We’ve got your favourite snacks.’ Issac smiled. Putting his book down and giving Charlie a hug. Half an hour later and the Xu’s living room was decorated in pillows and sleeping bags, the coffee table topped with all sorts of snacks and drinks and the pizzas ordered. Charlie had decidedly not updated the gang on the most recent chat with Nick’s doctor but upon chatting with Sarah recently. He’d agreed it was wrong to keep it from them. They deserved to know what was going on. Charlie waited until the pizzas had been delivered and devoured and everyone had settled down ready to pick the movies and get comfy.

“So…um..” Charlie started awkwardly. He knew this was going to be tough but it needed to be done. “Nick had another brain scan a few days ago…”. He explained, awkwardly fidgeting with the hem of his cardigan, listening as the chatter hushed down and his friends fell silent. “How did it go?” Elle asked hesitantly as Charlie hadn’t continued. Charlie remained silent for a moment trying to find the right words. “Charlie??” Tara asked. Charlie blinked as his tears were threatening to fall. “The doctor told us that Nick hasn’t shown any improvement and he has minimal brain activity.” Imogen gasped. “What does that mean?” Charlie swallowed a lump in his throat and rubbed the tears away from his eyes. “He said that usually if a patient in a coma had any chance of regaining consciousness, normally they would have done so by now.” Elle’s eyes went wide. Surely Charlie wasn’t saying what she thought he was. “What does that mean for Nick though?” Darcy asked, desperation in her voice. “Yeah.” Tara agreed “If the ventilator isn’t working then surely they just need to try another kind of treatment?” Charlie chewed his lower lip. “The ventilator is the only thing keeping Nick alive right now…” “What are you saying Charlie?” Tao asked, eyes wide. “The doctor suggested switching the ventilator off…” “I thought you said it’s the only thing keeping him alive?” Sahar asked, confused. “It is…” Charlie whispered. Tao shook his head, struggling to comprehend what he was hearing. Was Charlie saying what he thought he was. “ You mean-“ he couldn’t even get his words out as emotion took over. “Letting him go.” Charlie said quietly as he choked back a sob. “What??” Tara exclaimed. “They can’t!!” She cried. “They can’t just let him die.” Darcy said, feeling numb. Tao hadn’t said anything. He was in shock. This was the second time he had been in this predicament. His mother had to make the decision to turn his father’s life support off after a devastating heart attack when Tao was twelve. He’d never thought he would have to experience something like this again, especially not with one of his best friends. “Don’t they need consent?” Issac asked. “Surely Sarah won’t give them that.” Charlie nodded. “They can’t do it without Sarah’s consent which she’s adamant she’s not giving…” Tara sighed a breath of relief. “That’s good though isn’t it?” Charlie sighed. “The alternative being Nick stays on life support, but for how long??” He exasperated. “What kind of life is that for him? Laying there hooked up to machines as the world carries on around him…” “Charlie? What are you saying?” Elle asked hesitantly. “You’re not agreeing with the doctors are you??” “I don’t know!!” Charlie exclaimed as more tears ran down his face. “Of course I don’t want Nick to die. I love him. I love him more than life itself.” He cried. “I don’t know how much longer I can bear to see him like this, though. It’s killing me.” Tara quickly got up and rushed over, engulfing Charlie in a hug as he completely broke down. His whole body jerking with sobs. This has probably the most he had cried since Nick’s accident. He had been so busy keeping himself together around Sarah and holding up his armour so that he wouldn’t crumble and fall apart but he just couldn’t do it anymore. “I don’t want to lose Nick but part of me feels like I already him. I look at Nick some days and I feel like he’s not there anymore that it’s just a shell. It’s Nick on the outside but on the inside. He’s gone..” he cried as Tara just held him. The rest of the gang were numb with emotions. They didn’t know what to do or what to say. They didn’t know how to process what Charlie had just told them. Nick had to get better. He had to recover from this. They didn’t know how they would cope otherwise.

Tao was the first to break the silence 10 minutes later. “I think it’s only fair that we watch Nick’s favourite film out of respect for our favourite golden retriever.” He said as he reached into the drawer under the TV and pulled out a captain America DVD which in he had rented out this afternoon against his will. “Tao? Marvel? Are you feeling okay?” Issac asked as she slapped his hand against his friends forehead, mock checking his temperature. “This never leaves this room…” Tao replied as he carefully took the dvd out of its case and popped in into the DVD player. Charlie shuffled closer to Tao and rested his head on his friends shoulder. He appreciated the gesture and he knew Nick would too.

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“Am I doing the right thing, Di?” Sarah asked as she put her head in her hands as tears trickled down her cheeks. “What do you mean?” Diane asked as she sat down beside her sister. The relatives room was quiet. They were the only occupants in the room. Diane knew her sister often came in here if she needed a moment or was feeling overwhelmed at Nicky’s condition. She’d know as soon as she noticed the lack of her sisters presence in her nephews hospital room, she knew Sarah would be in here. “Keeping Nicky hooked up to that machine?” Sarah asked, her voice raw and hoarse. She had cried more tears over these past 4 weeks that some people do in a lifetime. Diane frowned. What was Sarah saying? “That machine is keeping him alive…” Diane replied. “Is it, though??” Sarah hit back, her tears once again threatening to fall. “You heard the doctor. Minimal brain activity. Nicky may not even be in there anymore. What if my baby is already gone?” Sarah choked out as her tears bubbled over the surface, her body wracked with heavy sobs. Diane instantly pulled her sister against her chest and let her sob. “I…I can’t help but feel like I’m being cruel by keeping him here. For me, for us…” Sarah sobbed. “It’s nearly been 5 weeks Di. Maybe he’s never going to wake up..maybe I have to just start to accept that.” She sobbed. Diane just held her sister and soothed her. She didn’t really know what to say. What could she say that would make this whole situation better? Nothing. The only thing that would make this situation better was Nicky waking up but he possibility of that happening was getting thinner and thinner.

“Why don’t we wait and speak to the doctor tomorrow? That neurology specialist is coming to speak to us…let’s just see what they’ve got to say.” Diane said. Sarah let out a shaky breath. What difference would that make. The doctors had obviously made their minds up that Nicky wasn’t going to recover for this. Maybe miracles could still happen?

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Diane sat by her nephews bedside. Sarah had nipped outside in the corridor to take a phone call and David had gone down to the cafe with Rich to get them all a drink. The meeting with Nick’s doctor’s and the neurologist wasn’t taking place until later in the afternoon. Sarah had pushed for it to happen in the afternoon as she refused to hear any sort of updates without Charlie present. “How about you outsmart all these doctors and open your eyes for us, love.” Diane said as she glanced down at Nick’s face. No reaction. No eye twitch. No nothing. She sighed. “The twins miss you loads…they keep asking me when big cousin Nicky will be well enough for piggyback rides..” she chuckled softly. Nick really was great with his younger cousins. He had always wanted a little sibling so when he’d found out that she was pregnant. He’d promised to treat his cousins just like he would a little brother or sister and he had stayed true to his word. Diane glanced up as David entered the room with Rich and the coffees. She couldn’t help but noticed her oldest nephews expression. His face looked like fizz as he slumped down on the chair after putting the coffees on the table. “What’s up with you?” Diane asked raising her eyebrows. “Mums just got off the phone with the court…” Diane nodded in understanding. The scumbag that had knocked Nick down and just drove away was being sentenced today. “5 year driving ban and 3 year custodial sentence.” David scoffed. “3 years??? Look what that bastard done to my brother!!! How the fuck is that justice?” He fumed. “Calm down, Davie.” Rich said. He understood his nephews frustrations. He was angry too. 3 years locked up was barely a punishment. “How can I calm down? That’s not justice. Nick still might die…” David replied, just as Sarah rented the room and the air in the room turned cool. David sighed as he looked at his mum. “I’m sorry mum…I’m just angry.” He sighed. “I know baby, me too.” Sarah said as she collapsed in to the seat. Giving the seriousness of Nick’s condition and the length of his coma. The two visitors at a time rule had been dropped weeks ago. The doctors and nurses agreeing it was vital that Nick’s family spent as much time as they wanted with him. “It just ain’t right.” David said. “You know you can appeal the decision..” Rich informed them. “I will be don’t you worry..” Sarah said firmly. “Not today though, let’s just hear what these doctors have to say, yeah.”

Sarah sipped her 3rd coffee of the day. She knew she really should cut down her caffeine intake but it was one of the very few things helping get her through the long days at the hospital. Rich had gone to pick the twins up from a child minders. Diane was flipping through a magazine and David lazily scrolling through his phone when there was a tapping at the door, Emily, one of the nurses on the ward stood. “Sorry to interrupt. Nicholas has another visitor.” Sarah frowned. Who else could it be? She, Diane and David were already here. Charlie would still be in school and she knew that her parents only visited in the evenings. That could only leave one other person. It couldn’t be, could it? Her ex husband would have a nerve showing up now. Nick has been in hospital for just short of 5 weeks and his father has visited once. 6 days after the accident. It had taken them long enough to get a hold of him in the first place, but when they finally had. He played the concerned parent card and booked.a flight right away. Sarah had been surprised, yet pleased he was making an effort although it had been short lived as he had only stayed 2 days and had to rush off with the excuse that something important had come up at work and that he had to go back to France immediately. Something more important than his son being in critical care in hospital? He had left with the promise that he would visit again as soon as he was able to be. Sarah had kept him in the loop for a few weeks after, sending him daily updates but then had stopped messaging him when his replies got more and more distant. It angered her, but she didn’t give Stéphane the reaction that he was probably fishing for.

“Just in here sir.” Sarah practically rolled her eyes, firstly at the fact that Stéphane hadn’t remembered where Nick’s room was. I mean he hadn’t visited in almost 4 weeks, but these are the kind of things a parent shouldn’t forget. Stéphane entered the room, glancing over at the bed that nick was occupying. His expression looked shocked at seeing the same tubes and machines that had been present when he had last visited his son. What? Had he been expecting to see Nick awake and talking? Not expecting his son to still be in a coma. Did he think the lack of messages from his ex wife meant that Nick was miraculously on the mend? She barely reacted when he greeted her with a kiss on the cheek. He hugged David who didn’t look ecstatic to see his father for once. He awkwardly hugged Diane. She didn’t mask the fact that he didn’t like her ex brother in law very much. Sarah really tried to keep her mouth shut, but she couldn’t. ‘ What are you doing here Stéphane?” She asked. Her ex husband shot her a confused look. “Visiting my son, what does it look like?” He replied. “The same son you have forgotten exists for the last 4 weeks?” She replied, her voice thick with sarcasm and annoyance. Who did he think he was? Rocking up like this as if he had a right. He lost any right he had as a parent when he chose work over his sick child. “That isn’t fair, Sarah.” Stéphane replied. “No I will tell you what isn’t fair..” She seethed. “You thinking you can just walk in and out our boys lives whenever you feel like it, not even regarding the fact that it is me that has to pick up the pieces when you let them down time after time. That’s what’s not fair. You haven’t even asked how Nicky is.” “You haven’t given me the chance.” “Well go on then..” Sarah replied, her patience with his running thin. “How is he? I take it he hasn’t woken yet? No?” Sarah scoffed. “Does it look like he’s woken up yet?” She fumed. “Mum, calm down.” David said softly. The last thing he wanted was his mum getting worked up. She had been through enough already. She was mentally and physically exhausted. “Your mother is just overreacting..” Stéphane replied. “What?” David said. It felt like something inside of him had just snapped. How dare his father insult his mother? How dare he make snide, witty comments when Sarah had been the one here, sitting by Nick’s bedside all day, everyday. “How dare you…” He said angrily. “I think she has every right to overreact don’t you?” He fumed. “She has practically been living here in the hospital with Nick for the last 5 weeks. She has sat by his side day and night, held his hand through every procedure that he’s gone through. Kept me from flying off the rails when where the hell have you been? Not here dad..” “David, you know I have had important work to attend to.” “Fuck your work dad.” David growled. “Nicky needed you. Mum needed you….I needed you.” He spat. “You weren’t here because you put everything and everyone else above us. Like you always do, like you always have. I have just been so naive not to have noticed it by now. Nicky did. He noticed it along time ago. He was right. You don’t care about us, so if you don’t care. Why should we?” “David…” “No!! I don’t want to hear anymore pathetic and pointless excuses. Nick almost died, dad….he still might die. He’s been through two major surgeries and has been breathing through a tube for weeks but even that wasn’t important enough for you to visit.” “I did visit.” “Correction.” David said. “Wasn’t important enough to make you stay.” Usually Sarah wouldn’t condone David speaking to his father like this but it needed said and he needed to hear it. “Maybe you guys should take this outside?” Diane suggested speaking up from the corner. “We’re still not 100% sure if Nicky can hear anything and do we really want him hearing any negativity?” “Diane is right.” Sarah agreed. The last thing she wanted was Nick hearing David ripping his father a new arsehole, although deep down she knew he would probably take great pleasure in witnessing it.. She glanced at her eldest son who shook his head. “Nah. It’s fine. I have nothing else to say to you, dad.” He had gotten it all off his chest. “I’m gonna go for a walk. I’ll be back in a bit.” He said as he gave Sarah a hug. He knew if he stayed in the room any longer he would start throwing punches and the last thing he wanted was to be banned from visiting his brother, especially not at the expense of his dead beat dad. With any luck, Stéphane would be gone by the time he returned.

Charlie couldn’t be gladder when school finished. Desperate to get to the hospital. Sarah had informed him yesterday that a meeting was taking place with Nick’s doctors and a neurology specialist who had more than 30 years experience working with brain injuries like Nick’s. Sarah had said that she wanted him there for the outcome of the meeting. He had given her his word. Jane was there to pick him up and drop him at the hospital. He knew that the doctors and neurologist were having their meeting around 3pm so hopefully by the time he got to the hospital, they would be ready to give them an update.

Sarah felt herself tense up at the knock on the doorframe. Glancing up she saw a kindly looking doctor waiting in the doorway. He was in dark blue scrubs, his hair was greying, he had glasses perched on the end of his nose and an iPad in his hand. Taking a breath, she squeezed Nick’s hand gently, “it’s time sweetheart. Let’s show this doctor how strong you are hmm?” Sarah stood up and greeted the doctor, who shook her hand as he introduced himself. “Mrs Nelson? I’m Dr Khan, I’m the neurologist over at Queen Elizabeth hospital.” Sarah smiled at him, “you’re here to help my Nicky?”
Dr Khan smiled gently at her. “May I sit?” She nodded and he brought a chair next to Sarah’s, sitting next to her. He glanced over at Nick, his face composed as he took in his appearance. He looked at the monitors, satisfied they were displaying as he expected. “So, as you know I’m head of neurology at my hospital. Dr Adams called me for a consult. What I’d like to do is get a whole new set of images of young Nicholas here. CT, X-ray, the lot. Then my team and I from QE will examine the images and discuss with both yourself and Nicks medical team what we believe the best course of action is.” He paused, sensing the hope radiating from her. “I do need to stress to you though, being ventilated this long, and still in a coma……I don’t want you to get your hopes up. I will be honest with you. It’s important we do what’s best for this young man here.” Sarah nodded, “I know. Thank you. I just know he’s in there somewhere. Thank you for coming, for helping.” Dr Khan placed his hand on her shoulder. “I know how hard this all is for families. We will do everything we can to get him back for you.” He shook her hand as he left. Immediately a team of doctors and nurses that Sarah didn’t recognise all swarmed into the room and began preparing Nick for the different scans he was having. She noted they all had the QE emblem from the queen Elizabeth hospital on their uniforms and stood out the way to let them work. Before they wheeled him away, Sarah gave him a kiss on the forehead. “I love you sweetheart, I’ll be here when you get back.” She watched, lower lip trembling as they wheeled him down the corridor and into the lift, finally letting out a quiet sob as the door closed. Sarah sat on the edge of the bed,her hands clasped in front of her. This was it, this was the last chance. If dr khan and his team thought it was hopeless what was she going to do? Was it time to let Nicky go?

A couple of hours later Nick was wheeled back into the room. Nurses busied themselves settling him back in. Reattaching wires and tubes, making adjustments. It still blew Sarah’s mind just how many people were all working with the one aim of looking after Nick. She would never be able to thank them enough. No box of chocolates or biscuits could possibly convey her gratitude to them. She made sure to bring such items with her most days and the staff were always very appreciative. But it felt like not enough. “Thank you,” she said as the nurses left, satisfied Nick was ok. “Our pleasure as always Sarah, thanks for the biscuits this morning, they went down a treat!” Sarah smiled at them, “least I can do!” She answered, taking her seat once more beside her son.
She was joined shortly after by a now calm David, along with Diane. “Rich has to stay with the children,” Diane apologised. “Any word from the doctors?”
Sarah shook her head. “Not yet. Where’s Stephane?” She glanced behind her sister to the empty corridor. “He’s on a work call in the canteen.” Diane grimaced, “I said we’d fetch him when it’s time for an update.” David scoffed in the corner. “I’m surprised he’s still here,” he spat out. Sarah held her hands out to him and he walked over to her, accepting her hug. “Baby, I know you are cross with him. I am too, but he’s here and we should let him be part of the conversation.” David looked at her wide eyed, “he hasn’t got the right to decide Nicky’s fate? Mum seriously?” Sarah stopped him with a look “no darling of course not. But he can have an opinion. WE will decide what we do, along with Charlie when he gets here, which shouldn’t be too much longer.” She glanced at her watch. It was already 3pm, the scans had taken so much longer than she had expected.
Dr Khan and Dr Adams arrived a few minutes later. “Hello again Mrs Nelson,” dr Khan said, “sorry that took a little longer than expected but I’ve been thoroughly examining. nicks scans. Are you ok for an update now?” Sarah nodded. “Just let me phone his dad, he’s downstairs.”
Diane held up her phone, “already on it sis.” She stepped out the room to make the call. Dr Adams suggested there was more room in the relatives room so they all made their way into the brightly coloured room. Sarah hated that room. So far it had given her nothing but bad news and she was deeply worried that it was going to be the same again. This was it. The verdict from one of the top neurologists in the country. If he thought there was no hope……
Stephane came striding into the room and took the remaining seat next to Sarah. Diane was on her other side. David was perched on a small chair next to them. Drs Adams and Khan both stood on the other side of the coffee table. “Is that everybody?” He questioned kindly. Sarah nodded. “Nicks boyfriend Charlie will be along later.”
Dr Khan nodded. “Right,” he cleared his throat, “let’s get straight to the point.” Everyone held their breath. “First off I am happy with all the steps taken by Dr Adams up to this point. I honestly wouldn’t have done anything different if he’d been under my care,” he nodded his appreciation to him. “ now, we have examined Nick’s scans. We’ve discussed it at length as a team and we believe the best course of action is to try taking Nick off the ventilator and seeing if he is able to breathe unaided.” He paused as the tension in the room rose. “What if he doesn’t breathe?” Sarah asked quietly. She had been bracing herself for this all day. “If he doesn’t breathe we will reintubate.” “You can do that?” Stephane asked, “it is possible?”
Dr Khan removed his glasses, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Yes. However I must advise you that reintubation comes with its own risks. I could not guarantee 100% that we would be able to successfully reintubate Nicholas.”
Sarah put her head in her hands. This felt too risky. “Why can’t we wait?” She looked pleadingly at both doctors. “Why does it have to be so soon? He just needs more time.”
Dr Khan smiled gently at her. “I know this seems risky Mrs Nelson, but I can assure you we all believe this is the right course of action for your son. He hasn’t shown any improvement on the ventilator. We need to get him breathing unaided as soon as possible. Then, hopefully he will be able to wake up. We would advise against leaving him on the ventilator long term, that also comes with risks. Lung conditions, blood clots are all associated with long term use of a ventilator.” Sarah looked at her sister, who gave her a teary small smile. “Um, ok can we chat as a family? When do you need an answer.?”
Dr Khan glanced at Dr Adams, “well if it’s ok with dr Adams here I’d like to be present when he is removed from the ventilator. I have a window of time tomorrow afternoon? If you decide to go ahead with this course of action I’ll get Dr Adams to let me know. How does that sound? Gives you the rest of the day to make a decision.”
“Thank you doctor,” Stephane shook his hand, “thank you for taking care of my boy.”
Sarah tutted quietly under her breath, causing David to grin at her.
The two doctors left the room and the atmosphere immediately calmed. “So…..” Diane said, breaking the silence, “what do you think Sarah?”
Sarah was about to reply when Stephane interrupted, “well obviously we go with the doctors advice no?” He looked from one sister to the other, obviously bewildered by their indecision. “It’s not that simple Stephane. This is a huge decision.” Stephane tutted. “We should trust the professionals. They know what they are doing. Nick is strong, he will be fine.”
“He got hit by a car Stephane,” Sarah hissed. “He got thrown in the air and landed so hard on his head he’s been on a ventilator ever since. It has nothing to do with being strong.”
“Yes yes I know that. I did not mean to offend you. I just think we must listen to the doctors…..”
“Dad, don’t you get it?” David stared at him, “this could kill Nick. The doctor literally said as much, they might not be able to get him back on the ventilator. It’s not an easy decision to make. We are literally gambling on Nick’s life. It they switch him off and he doesn’t breathe by himself….then….he might….”David tailed off as he looked up at the doorway and saw Charlie’s ashen face staring at him, his mum Jane looking equally horrified. “Die?” Charlie whispered, finishing the sentence before bursting into sobs. This could not be happening.
Jane held Charlie as he cried, looking to Sarah for confirmation of David’s words. “What’s happened?” She asked quietly, rubbing Charlie’s back.
Sarah tried to smile but it came out wrong. “Come and sit down Charlie love. We need to talk to you.”
“I’ll go and grab some coffees for everyone, “Diane declared, “I need to phone rich and tell him the news. I’ll be back and we can decide what to do. As a family.” She left no room for arguing and Stephane nodded sheepishly.
Sarah carefully filled Charlie and Jane in on the update from the doctor. Charlie tried to take it in but his head was fixated on what might happen if Nick couldn’t breathe in his own. “What are you going to do?” He asked Sarah, his eyes shining with tears. “I’m not sure sweetheart. I trust the doctors 100%,” she looked at Stephane as she said that, “but as his mum this is a scary decision.”
Charlie thought about his gorgeous, loving, generous boyfriend from before the accident, and thought about how he was now. Nick wouldn’t want to live like this forever. He would want the chance to come back to them. “I think maybe we should try it,” he whispered. “Nick would hate being helpless like this. He’s such a fighter, I believe in my heart he’s going to be ok.” Sarah smiled at him, “I think so too. It’s just an awful lot of responsibility as his mum to make this decision.”
She squeezed Charlie’s hands then turned to her eldest. “What do you think David?”
David shrugged his shoulders helplessly. He wasn’t the right person to make this decision. “I don’t know mum. I wish we could wait a little longer, but I guess I trust the doctors. We should try.”
Sarah nodded. Diane returned with a tray of drinks, passing them around to everyone. “I think I’m going to tell the doctors to try,” she said to Diane, “do you think that’s the right call?”
Diane hugged her tight, “Sarah, there’s no right or wrong call, I think listening to the doctors is smart. And whatever happens, Nicky knows you are looking out for him.” A tear crept its way down Sarah’s cheek. They were really going to take Nick off the ventilator? She was glad that everyone was in agreement, it would have been an impossible decision if just one member of nicks circle had disagreed.
“Can I go see him?” Charlie whispered, his cheeks stained with tears. “Of course love, he’ll be thrilled to see you.”
Jane stayed with Sarah while Charlie made his way to nicks room. “Hi baby,” he said softly, kissing him gently on the forehead. “God I love you Nick. I need you to listen to me ok? Tomorrow the doctors are going to take you off this machine. You just need to breathe for me. Please?” He begged quietly. “You’ve got this babe, I know you have.” He laid his head down on nicks chest, listening to his heart beating and comforted by the rise and fall of his chest.

Later that evening after everyone had gone home, and Stephane had checked into a hotel, Sarah made herself comfy in the reclining chair which had been her bed for what felt like forever. She laid quietly, watching her youngest son. “Now you listen to me Nicholas Nelson,” she looked at him sternly. “Tomorrow is a big day. You show those doctors what Nelson’s are made of. You breathe my darling. You hear me?”
Nick remained motionless. Sarah closed her eyes. She didn’t expect to get any sleep tonight, but she might as well try.

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Charlie didn’t get a wink of sleep. He kept replaying David’s words over and over in his head. This was it. By the end of the day Nick would either be breathing on his own….or…..the other choice didn’t bear thinking about.
He dragged himself downstairs at around 6am, finally giving up the pretence of sleep. He was surprised to find his mum at the kitchen table, nursing a cup of tea. “Charlie, I didn’t expect to see you yet. Couldn’t sleep?” He shook his head, “no, not really. Mum can I stay home today? I can’t think about anything other than Nick. I need to be there….please?” He sat down opposite her at the table. Jane smiled sadly at him. “Of course. I should have said as much yesterday. I will give the school a ring and let them know.” She hesitated. “Have you spoken to your friends about the decision?” Charlie shook his head, letting it thump on the table in front of him. “I don’t know how to tell them,” he mumbled. Jane sighed, “just be honest with them, tell them the facts and that you will update them later today.” Charlie nodded. He took his phone out of his pj trouser pocket and went to the group chat.

Charlie: hey guys I won’t be in school today. The doctors are taking Nick off the ventilator later to see if he can breathe on his own. It’s risky but the best next step. If he can’t they will try to reintubate but the doctor said there’s no guarantees that will be successful. Please send Nick all the good vibes and luck. I’ll message you later. I don’t have the headspace to reply today but I’ll make sure Nick knows you guys are thinking of him. Love you ❤️

He put the phone down on the table with a loud sigh. Jane handed him a cup of coffee. “I’ll take you to the hospital at lunch time. Try and rest up till then ok?” Charlie nodded, grabbing the mug and heading back up to his room.

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Tao met the rest of the Paris squad at the gates to Truham. “Hey,” he said, dropping his bag on the grass and looking at everyone. The mood was somber. “I’m not sure what we should do.” Isaac was saying. I know we can’t go and visit Nick. But it just seems so wrong to carry on our day when something so massive is happening to our friend.”
Tara nodded, “I know, when I read Charlie’s message it felt like my heart just stopped. I can’t imagine what his family is going through. It’s just so awful…..” she choked out a sob, causing Darcy to wrap her in a tight hug.
Tao swallowed. This all felt so close to home with his dad. But Nick had youth on his side. He had to be ok. “Come on guys, we need to think positive. Moping isn’t going to help. Nick needs all our positive energy. And if the worst happens……we need to be strong for Charlie,
Elle nodded, putting her arm around Tao. “Positive thoughts only. And I’m not religious, but I’m not above saying a little prayer or two…..you know, in case anyone is listening.”

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Charlie arrived at the hospital at noon. The mood was quiet and nervous. “Hi,” he said gently leaning over to kiss Nick. “Charlie love, it’s good to see you.” Sarah smiled warmly at him. “Um, so what is the plan?” He didn’t take his gaze off Nick as he spoke. “Dr Khan should be here in an hour or so I think.” Charlie nodded. One more hour. He perched on the bed beside Nick, stroking his arm carefully. “You’ve got this baby,” he whispered.

Dr khan arrived sooner than anyone was ready for. He sat down and explained the procedure to Sarah and the rest of the group. “ we will know,pretty much instantly if he is able to breathe unaided. I’m afraid we don’t allow family in for this procedure. It can be quite jarring for families to watch. I promise we will let you know straight away.”
Sarah nodded before turning to Nick. “I love you so much my darling. Just keep fighting for me ok? Just breathe. I love you.” She allowed the tears to flow as she kissed him for what could be the last time. Charlie was quiet. He didn’t want to say goodbye to Nick. He had to believe that this was going to work, so he just kissed him softly and whispered, “I love you. Always will,” then took Diane’s hand as they went back to the dreaded relatives room. Stephane gave Nick an awkward pat on the shoulder. David stood watching, numb. Tears in his eyes that refused to fall. “See you later Nicky,” he said quietly. Sarah was the last to leave. She walked slowly to the relatives room and sat down. “And now we wait,” she said quietly.

Dr Khan and his team prepared the room. The had a crash cart ready. All the equipment they might need to reintubate Nick if needed. “Everyone ready?” He looked at his team, who along with dr Adams were all in position. “Ok. Switching off the ventilator now.” He leaned over to the machine, clicking the large switch into the off position. Instantly the whirring noise stopped. “Removing the ventilation tube,” he reached over to nicks face, gently unstrapping the large tube from around his face and carefully pulling it out until finally it was completely removed. “Oxygen” he stated, and a nurse placed an oxygen mask over nicks mouth and nose.
They watched the monitors. Nicks heart rate slowed significantly and the alarms sounded. “Come on lad,” Dr Khan jostled Nick slightly. “There’s a room full of people waiting for you to wake up. You just need to breathe on your own.”
His heart rate continued to slow. “Damn.” The doctor stated. “Shall we prepare to reintubate?” The nurse asked, bringing the tray of instruments closer. “No….not yet…..” dr khan studied the monitor. The whole room watched, willing Nick to breathe on his own.
Just as Dr Khan was considering putting him back on the ventilator nicks heart rate began to pick up. The beeping became more regular and the alarm stopped. “Excellent!” Dr khan declared with a smile. He looked at dr Adams. “Do you want to give the family the good news or shall I?”

Sarah was pacing the room like a caged animal. The waiting was literally unbearable. Right now just down the corridor her baby was being taken off a ventilator. He probably already was. Was he breathing? Had they had to reintubate? Was he even alive at this point? She groaned in frustration before feeling her heart stop at the knock on the door. Her head snapped up to see Dr Adams with a huge smile on his face. Surely that meant good news?
“He’s breathing on his own,” dr Adams declared triumphantly. The room exploded into noise, relieved shouts and laughter. “Oh thank god.” Sarah exclaimed. “He’s really breathing on his own?” Dr Adams smiled and nodded. “It was touch and go to begin with but his heart rate has stabilised and he’s just on oxygen now. The next step is hopefully getting him to wake up.” Sarah looked in disbelief. Her baby was breathing. Charlie was openly crying, tears of happiness for the first time since the nightmare began all those weeks ago. “Can we see him?” Dr Adams smiled. “Of course, come on through. Maybe not all at once as if he does wake up it’ll all be very overwhelming for him. I’m not enforcing a two person rule, just maybe not this many to start. Nick is still very poorly but this is a fantastic step forward.”
Sarah and Stephane went first. Charlie was desperate to see Nick but he didn’t feel he could argue with his dad seeing him first, even if he was an absent father. He doubted he would stay with him long.
As expected a few minutes later Stephane emerged. “David do you want to visit your brother?” David looked over to Charlie. “You can go first if you like.” He offered. “Youre sure?” Charlie didn’t think he could wait a moment longer. “Yeah.” David reassured him. Charlie raced into the room to be with Nick. He immediately noted the lack of tubing in his mouth and how much quieter the room was without the noise of the ventilator. Nick now had a large oxygen mask on his face but his chest was rising and falling and he was doing it without help. Charlie beamed at Sarah. “He did it!” She grinned back. I know. It’s amazing. The doctors think he will start to wake up now that the sedation from being ventilated is wearing off.” Charlie s eyes widened. So much progress. Nick was coming back to him.

It took Nick a further day before he began to show signs of waking. Charlie and Sarah were sat with him, Charlie telling him how excited the Paris squad were that he was doing so well, and that they couldn’t wait to visit when he woke up. Sarah was listening to his chatter, smiling softly to herself. Suddenly Nick let out a groan under his oxygen mask and his head twitched slightly. “Nicky?” Sarah whispered, leaning close. “Nicky darling, open your eyes, it’s mum.” Charlie held his breath as nicks whole body became more animated. He was groaning, making noises but he still hadn’t opened his eyes. Sarah pressed the alarm button on the wall behind nicks head and a nurse appeared instantly. “I think he’s waking up?” Sarah sobbed with relief. “That’s it, wake up baby.” Charlie held nicks hand, rubbing it gently also quietly begging him to wake up.
Finally, Nick opened his eyes and began taking long slow blinks. “Oh my god,” Charlie breathed. “Nick?”
Nick felt like he was drowning. His ears were pounding, the pain in his head was unbearable. His chest felt heavy, like he’d taken a hit from something. Where was he? He opened his eyes and looked around. A woman was sat on one side, her face smiling but teary. She looked familiar but he wasn’t sure who she was. He turned to the other side and there was a teenage boy, he had lovely curly hair…..but who was he? He tried to open his mouth to speak but all that came out was a strange garbled moan. Why couldn’t he speak? What was happening? He began to thrash from side to side, he needed to get out of this bed. But where was he meant to go? He felt panic rise in his chest, he tried to move his arms but one of them screamed at him in pain.
“Nicky, darling calm down. It’s ok sweetheart it’s going to be ok”
Charlie looked in horror. He could see in nicks eyes that he had no idea who he was. Who his mum was. He’d been so stressed about getting Nick off the ventilator and awake he hadn’t considered what state he might be in when he woke. Was this the brain damage they spoke of all those weeks ago? What would happen if Nick was permanently brain damaged?
The nurse injected his IV with a clear liquid. “Just to calm him down a bit. It’s not good for him to be worked up. I’ll page the doctor immediately and we can have a look at his cognitive functions. Try not to worry.”
Nicks eyes closed as he sank back into the pillow letting the darkness claim him once more.
Charlie and Sarah looked at each other in horror. They’d been so convinced the worst was behind them, but now…..they weren’t so sure.

Chapter Text

“He didn’t recognise us…” Charlie muttered as he glanced down at Nick who had drifted off into a drug induced slumber. He looked peaceful. His chest beating up and down a friendly reminder that Nick was breathing on his own, unaided by the ventilator. He was petrified that this was the way things were going to be now. Nick not knowing who anybody was. Having to relearn everything? Not his beautiful Nick. Sarah felt numb. That hadn’t been the reaction to Nicky waking up she had been anticipating. “He’s in there. I know he is…” she said softly as she held on to her son’s hand. “Don’t be alarmed by that reaction.” The nurse said as she fiddled about with Nick’s monitors. “Nick has been unconscious for a long time. It’s natural for him to be frightened and confused. We will know more after the doctor does a full assessment.”

Dr Adams popped in a little while later. Nick was in a deep sleep. The doctor checked the monitors and listened to Nick’s chest and lungs, being careful not to disturb him. He glanced at Sarah. “How did he seem when he woke up?” He asked. Sarah sighed. She had built herself up so much for that moment and it just wasn’t what she imagined. She knew she had to be patient. Nicky had been through so much. “Frightened..” She said blinking back tears. “So very confused.” The doctor nodded. “He will probably be in and out of it for the next few days. His body has been through so much. He is probably exhausted..” He explained. “Once he is a little more alert. I have various tests that I would like to carry out. Please try not to worry. Nicholas is awake snd breathing unaided. This is massive progression.” “He didn’t look like he remembered us.” Charlie sighed. “Nicholas has suffered a massive head injury. Temporary amnesia is a very common side effect related to these type of brain injuries. We will know more after I conduct a full physical and cognitive assessment.”

Nick felt like he was floating. His head felt heavy and fuzzy. There was a heaviness in his left arm. His head ached. His throat was so sore. It felt raw and was painful to swallow. His mouth was dry. He was confused. Where was he? What was that irritating beeping sound around him. He blinked open his eyes. White. White walls. White ceiling. He moved his head to the side and let out a little groan and in an instance the kind face from before was towering over him again. “Nicky? Baby?” She looked familiar. Very familiar. That’s right. He knew her. She was mum. She was nice. She was good. She wouldn’t hurt him. “It’s okay sweetheart.” Sarah soothed as she ran her fingers through Nick’s hair. He looked terrified, confused and disoriented, but he didn’t seem to be freaking out just as much as he had before. “You’re in the hospital, baby.” She explained, watching as his eyebrows knitted together as he was trying to remember what had happened. His mind was very fuzzy. It was no use right now. The oxygen mask from earlier had been replaced by a nasal tube. It was more comfortable. “There was an accident.” She decided to leave it there for now. Nick evidently wasn’t taking any of it in. He rolled his head to the side and allowed his eyes to drop shut again. Sarah let out an exasperated sigh as she sunk bank in to her chair. “You just sleep my darling…” she said softly. She was desperate for any sign that Nick was okay. What if he was brain damaged? What if he didn’t know anything. Could he even speak? Would he be able to talk? Did he even know who she was? So many unanswered questions.

“What are you trying to tell me, baby?” Sarah asked. She could tell by the frustrated look on her son’s face that he wanted to tell her something. He just couldn’t find the words. Nick let out a muffled sound, but no words came out. He was trying. He brought his good hand towards his head. “Your head?” Sarah questioned. “Is it hurting?” She asked. Fearing that her son was in pain and wasn’t able to tell her that. Nick gripped on to his hair, looking at the empty chair. Sarah frowned. She didn’t understand. “Are you in pain, darling?” She asked again “Blink once for yes and twice for no…”. Nick blinked two times. Sarah smiled softy. Nick understood. That was good, but she still didn’t know what he was trying to say. She glanced at her son, his eyes fixated on something. She followed his gaze towards the bedside table where a framed photo was. A photo of Nick and Charlie. Smiling. At the top of the Eiffel Tower, during their school trip there in the summer. The penny dropped. “Charlie?” She said. Nick’s eyes lightened up at the mention of his boyfriends name and Sarah felt her heart swell in her chest. “He’ll be here later baby.’ She smiled assuring him. This was good. Nick knew who she was and he clearly remembered Charlie. The younger boy was going to be thrilled.

The next day was full of scans and tests. Nick was less than amused at the amount of times a torch was shone in his eyes. He was asked a series of questions, blinking once for yes and twice for no in response. He had a CT scan and an MRI. Both coming back clear. The swelling around Nick’s brain had almost completely subsided. There was no swelling around the spinal cord and after carrying out a series of tests, the doctor was fully confident that Nick had full sensation and feeling of his lower limbs. The lack of verbal communication was concerning, but Nick was alert and coherent. He advised Sarah that these things just took time. He said that sometimes selected mutism was associated with head injuries and that Nick would speak when he was ready or may just require some help from a speech therapist but there seemed to be no neurological issues.

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Charlie closed his maths book with a sigh. Today was dragging massively. He didn’t want to be at school, he wanted to be at the hospital with Nick. His lovely, gorgeous Nick, who was finally awake! The last day had felt like a rollercoaster. One minute there was amazing news that Nick was breathing unaided, then he woke but didn’t recognise them. A text from Sarah this afternoon saying he’d been trying to ask about him….but unable to speak or verbally communicate in any way. The most recent message said that the doctors were confident he had no lasting damage to his spine which was amazing news but that it may take time for him to speak again. Charlie wasn’t sure he could take any more news from the hospital. He just wanted to be there while it was happening. It was torture to be at school. He shoved his book in his bag and made his way to English class. The last class of the day. He was meant to go to orchestra practise after school today but he was absolutely skipping that to get to the hospital quicker.
Eventually, after an hour of listening to his teacher drone on about god knows what….his torture was finally over and he was heading into the hospital. As he approached the intensive care unit he bumped into David who was walking down the corridor, coffee in hand and an overnight bag slung over his shoulder. “Oh, hi,” David said awkwardly, not making eye contact with Charlie. “Um, Nick’s being moved to a room on the next floor up. The doctor said he doesn’t need the critical care anymore. So….yeah. He’s just being settled in.” Charlie didn’t care that the news was coming from David. He broke into a huge grin. “That’s amazing!” He breathed out. “Oh my god. That’s such good news.”
David looked at him, “yeah it is. I can show you where he is?” Charlie nodded and followed David into the lift. An awkward silence settled over them as they waited for the lift to make its way to the correct floor. “How is he doing today?” David shrugged. “The same really. Hasn’t said anything. He seems a bit more alert but he’s sleeping a lot. Mum told you about the tests he’s had on his spine and everything?” Charlie nodded. “Yeah. Such a relief.” David nodded. The lift went quiet again. Thankfully it was a short ride and the doors opened with a ping. “This way.” He gestured down the corridor to a small side room. Charlie poked his head round the doorway and was delighted to see Nick awake in his bed. The bed had been raised at the head so he was more upright. He still had nasal oxygen and a couple of IV drips in his arms. But some of the monitoring had been removed and he had been changed into his own pyjamas. He looked much more like himself. A very battered and bruised version of himself but still vastly improved than the last few days. Charlie could scarcely believe how much better Nick was since only a couple of days ago when they were worried he wouldn’t be able to breathe unaided.
David squeezed past him and into the room. “Look who I found on my way up here,” he announced to Nick and Sarah, who immediately turned their heads toward the door. “Charlie,” Sarah beamed. “You found us ok then!” Charlie smiled at her, then turned his attention to Nick. He was looking at him with a small, slightly pained smile, but with a definite look of recognition.
“Hi,” Charlie walked up to the bed, close to Nick without touching him. “How are you feeling?” He searched nicks face for any answer.
Nick couldn’t take his eyes off Charlie. His brain was still very foggy and confused and it took him a while to process what he was hearing around him. But he knew Charlie. His boyfriend. He opened his mouth to say hi back but the words just got stuck in his throat. He groaned in frustration and furrowed his eyebrows. Why couldn’t he just say hi back? What was wrong with him? His breath started to sound shallow as he began to spiral. “Hey, Nicky, it’s ok.” His mums voice broke through his panic, her hand gently on his shoulder. “You don’t need to speak sweetheart. Just relax for me ok?” She looked up at Charlie who was looking crest fallen. “He’s still finding it hard to get any words out. But he definitely knows who you are don’t you baby.” Nick nodded, his eyes focused on Charlie’s.
Charlie immediately crossed the room and sat down beside Nick. He gently reached out to hold his hand and give it a squeeze. “Hi babe,” he said,feeling his eyes fill with tears as he spoke. “I’ve missed you so much. I love you. Don’t worry about talking ok. Just give you self some time. You’ve been asleep for so long.” Nick lifted his arm up and Charlie looked over to Sarah, “ can I hug him?” He asked. He was nervous of hurting him. There were a lot less wires and tubes than before but he didn’t want to do the wrong thing. Sarah smiled. “Of course, just be gentle. David and I will pop and get a snack. Give you two a moment to reconnect ok? “ she looked at Nick. “We will be right back baby ok?” Nick nodded slowly, then turned his head back to Charlie, raising his arm up once more. Charlie carefully laid himself down next to Nick, tucked in the crook of his arm. His head on nicks shoulder. He felt Nick sigh and relax into his pillow. He looked up to see nicks face looking down at him. “I love you so much Nick. I….i have been so worried about you.” Nick blinked slowly, trying to process the words. He wasn’t completely sure what had happened to him. The doctors had asked him questions, and he knew he’d been in a coma for a long time. He had been told he was hit by a car. But he didn’t remember anything. Everything in his past seemed so blurry. He wanted to ask, to find out more details. But with Charlie in his arms all he really wanted in that moment was to just be. He ran his good arm gently along Charlie’s back. He breathed in Charlie’s shampoo, wincing at his sore throat. From a ventilator tube apparently. Something he couldn’t get his head round at all. He’d literally not been breathing by himself for all those weeks. It was crazy.
He allowed his eyes to close. Charlie held him carefully.

Sarah and David returned from the hospital shop with a small bag of snacks to keep everyone going for the evening. Her heart melted at the sight in front of her. Both boys fast asleep on nicks hospital bed. Nick looked calm for the first time since he woke up. She nudged David. “Don’t wake them ok?” David nodded, quietly tip toeing into the room and taking an empty seat in the corner. He started scrolling on his phone. Sarah sat in the chair by Nick. She felt a lump in her throat and willed herself not to cry and wake them up. They looked so peaceful and innocent curled up together, a scene she wasn’t sure she’d ever see again.

Eventually the doctor came in to do his rounds and they woke up. Charlie looked sheepishly at the doctor but he just smiled. “Hello everyone,I’m Dr McNeil, I’ll be taking over from dr Adams now that Nick here has been discharged from critical care.” Charlie slid off the bed and into his chair as Nick groggily opened his eyes and tried to focus on what the doctor was saying. “How are we doing this afternoon?” He brought up nicks chart and began taking readings. “He’s still quite confused,” Sarah answered, “he hasn’t managed to say anything yet.”
The doctor nodded, “I’m not too concerned about that just yet, he’s only been awake for a day.” He looked at Nick, “your body and your brain have been through something extremely traumatic. You need to give yourself time and patience. Ok?” Nick stared at him for a while before nodding. He felt like he was on a ten second delay. Like when the sound and the picture aren’t in sync on the tv.
“Now, it is extremely important that we get this young man up and moving. His muscles will have atrophied a bit and the sooner we get him mobile the better. I’ve arranged for his physio to begin first thing tomorrow. First step will be getting him walking to and from the bathroom so we can get rid of his catheter. How does that sound?” Charlie squeezed nicks hand, Sarah looked at the doctor carefully, “you think he’s ready?” The doctor smiled, “he’s ready. I’ve got my best physio coming to see him tomorrow. He’ll have him up and about in no time.”
“And the communication issue?” Sarah looked nervously at him, “his scans are all clear so for now we just wait. If there’s no improvement in a day or two we’ll get a speech and language consult. But I honestly believe he just needs some time”
Sarah nodded. “Ok, any other questions?” They all shook their heads. “Ok, well I’ll see you tomorrow. Get some rest Nick, tomorrow will be a busy day.”

The following day Nick was woken up by a nurse bustling into his room. His mum had gone home to sleep for the first time since Nick had been admitted. The doctors had insisted on it. Sarah had been very reluctant, but had been gently but firmly told that she needed to go home. Nick was no longer in critical condition and they needed to get him used to being by himself overnight. Sarah had eventually agreed, insisting they phone her instantly if anything happened. Nick had been so exhausted that he had barely registered her leaving. But it felt odd to wake up to someone other than his mum. He looked bleary eyed at the nurse who was carrying a tray of breakfast. “Morning Nicholas,” he said kindly. “Are you hungry? I have the finest breakfast on the 5th floor of this wonderful establishment!” Nick frowned at the tray. It looked distinctly unappetising. He tried to remember the last time he actually ate anything. It must have been before the accident. He wondered how he was getting his food in his coma. The nurse sensed his confusion. “Hey, don’t worry. We will just try a little. You’ve been tube fed for a long time so anything that takes your fancy on this tray? Well give it a go. No pressure.” Nick nodded his understanding. Ben, his nurse, raised his bed head for him so he was upright and pulled the tray up close. There was porridge, toast and a yogurt. Along with a juice box and a cup of tea. Nick eyed it all warily, his gaze settling on the yogurt. “Ok great!” Ben opened the yogurt and put a small amount on a teaspoon. He lifted it to nicks mouth. After a beat, Nick opened his mouth and let Ben feed him a spoonful. He held the yogurt in his mouth for a bit before swallowing carefully. The yogurt felt nice on his sore throat and he smiled softly at the nurse. “Excellent!” Ben grinned at him, scooping some more up and feeding him. Nick shook his head and tried to take the spoon from him. “Oh I see, you want to do it yourself?” He handed him the spoon. Nicks arm was shaking as he made his first attempt, the yogurt spilling slightly as he lifted it to his mouth. Ben helped him and smiled at the satisfaction on nicks face as he managed to feed himself. “Nice work mate,” he said, holding out the yogurt for Nick. It was a little messy but eventually he had managed the whole thing. “Well done Nick. Want anything else?” Nick reached for the juice. Ben opened it for him and he sucked on the little straw. It was heaven for his sore throat. Ben cleared the rest of the tray away. “That was fantastic Nick. We’ll have you out of here in no time. Your physio should be here soon. Work hard for her ok, she is amazing and if you listen to her and do all the exercises she gives you it’ll help you recover quicker ok?”
Nick nodded. His head felt less fuzzy today. Things seemed, clearer. Sharper.
Sarah arrived a little after 7am, she rushed into the room. It had been horrible being away from Nick, but she had to admit that a hot shower, a night in her own bed with Nellie and a Decent breakfast had made her feel like a new woman. “Morning Nicky, how did you sleep?” Nick looked at her with a small smile, giving her a thumbs up. “That’s good sweetheart,” she replied, noticing that he had answered her much more quickly than yesterday. She settled down in the chair next to him.
“Hi Nick,” a young woman appeared in the doorway, dressed in white uniform. “I’m Rebecca, I’m your physio.” She shook hands with both Sarah and Nick. “I’ve had a good look at your file, I’m going to get you to respond to me with nods and shakes of your head ok? Anything hurts and you need to stop, squeeze my arm ok?” Nick nodded. He was a little nervous about what was about to happen.
“So the plan is, I’m going to get you to sit up, swivel round in bed and then to standing. That might not sound like much, but trust me it’ll be enough for our first session.” She smiled kindly at Nick. “Mum, you are welcome to stay, or you could go get yourself a cup of tea.” Sarah looked to Nick. “Nicky baby, would you like me to stay?” Nick nodded quickly. Sarah smiled at him. “Ok sweetheart I’ll stay right here.”
Rebecca gave her a smile. “Perfect. Right…..let’s do this Nick!”

Half an hour later, Nick was sweating as he laid back in bed. That had been the hardest 30 minutes of his life. He couldn’t believe that he, an athlete a rugby player, would be saying that standing up was the hardest thing he’d ever done. But it was. He was exhausted. His legs had almost given way multiple times. His injured arm kept getting in his way and he’d ended up putting most of his weight on poor Rebecca, who had taken it all cheerfully in her stride. They’d managed to get him to standing, and even to take two steps away from the bed before he almost collapsed and they got him sat back down again. As he lay back, breathing heavily, Rebecca updated his chart. “That was such a good first session Nick. Don’t look so disheartened. I’m really pleased. I’ll be back this afternoon. I want to get you sat in your chair. Ok?” Nick nodded sleepily and allowed himself to doze as she finished up.
Sarah had watched the whole thing with her heart in her mouth. “Did he really do ok?” She asked as she watched Nick sleep. “He really did,” Rebecca reassured her. “It’ll be baby steps for a while. But just think how far he’s come. He’s a fighter, the fact that he’s an athlete will help him. He has the right attitude, the right mindset. You’ve raised a wonderful determined young man.” Sarah beamed with pride. “He really is,” she agreed. “Thank you for helping him.”
“My pleasure,” Rebecca gathered her things, “I’ll see you around 3pm.” She left and Sarah turned back to Nick. He was sweaty. So she gently brushed his hair off his forehead and stroked his hair as he dozed. “Well done sweetheart, “ she whispered.
“Mmmm…..mum….” Nick murmured in his sleep. Sarah’s hand froze in his hair. “Nicky?” Nick cracked his eyes open. “Nicky baby, say it again?” Nick looked at her confused for a second before his eyes widened and he opened his mouth, “mum…” it was quiet and it was hoarse, but he had done it. Sarah threw her arms around him allowing the tears to flow. “Oh my clever clever darling boy. “ she wept. “I knew you were in there somewhere.” Nick smiled softly at her. “Mum,” he repeated. It was just one word but it was the best word Sarah had ever heard. She couldn’t wait to tell everyone. They would be so excited. She pulled back to look him in the eyes. “Rest now baby, I’m so proud of you.” He closed his eyes and succumbed to sleep.
Sarah pulled out her phone and sent a text to the group chat which had been set up in the early days of nicks stay at the hospital. When she’d been so stressed and worried and wanted to update everyone on any changes in his condition. The group consisted of Sarah, her mum, Di, Rich, Charlie, Jane, david and Stephane. She scoffed at the thought of getting a reply from Stephane but she knew everyone else would be made up at nicks progress this morning.

Sarah: Nicky has had a fantastic morning! The physio got him out of bed, she was really pleased with him, and then as he was falling back to sleep he said ‘mum’! Twice! 🎉🎉🎉 things are looking up. ❤️

Charlie read the text at lunchtime sitting on their usual bench outside. “What’s got you smiling like a Cheshire Cat?” Tao looked at him suspiciously. Charlie beamed at him showing him the message from Sarah. “Oh my god!” Isaac almost squealed. “That’s amazing news Charlie,” “I know!” Charlie grinned, “I can’t wait to see him later.” He sent a quick reply to Sarah full of happy celebration emojis. He felt happy for the first time in a long time. Nick was getting better. He knew it would be a slow process but for the first time he really felt like they were going to be able to put this behind them. That Nick was going to be ok.

He stopped off at the little Tesco on the way to the hospital after school and picked up some snacks for Nick. As he was queuing he spotted a small stuffed teddy with a love heart in his hands. It was in the reduced section, looking very sad and sorry for itself. Obviously a left over from last valentines. He picked it up and added it to his basket. It would make Nick smile. He arrived at nicks room and was astonished to find Nick sitting up in the chair by his bed. He looked exhausted and sweaty but extremely proud of himself as he grinned at Charlie. A lady was with him, his physio Charlie guessed. “ hello there,” she said, “are you a friend of nicks?” “Charlie’s his boyfriend,” Sarah said quickly, jumping up to give Charlie a hug. “Hello sweetheart,” she smiled. “Oh my apologies,” Rebecca said, “lovely to meet you Charlie.” She turned to Nick. “Now I’d like you to sit here for the next half hour or so. Then I’ll be along to get you back into bed. If you feel unwell or have any issues get your mum to call for me ok? Nick nodded, his focus clearly on Charlie. Rebecca chuckled, “right, I’ll see you in a little while!”she left the room.”look at you all upright!” Charlie giggled, clutching the bag of snacks in front of him. “You feeling ok?” Nick nodded gesturing for Charlie to sit on the edge of the bed next to him, which he did. “Nicky’s got a surprise for you, haven’t you baby?” Nick nodded, then shifted a little in his chair before clearing his throat and saying in a quiet but determined voice, “char…” he looked extremely pleased with himself. “He’s been practicing all afternoon,” Sarah said fondly. Charlie’s bottom lip wobbled as he tried in vain to keep it together. “Oh my god,” he whispered, launching himself at Nick who caught him with a slightly pained noise. “Oh shit, sorry. I’m sorry.” Charlie immediately tried to loosen his grip but Nick wasn’t having it. He pulled Charlie closer until he was virtually sat on his lap. “Char,…..” he said again. “God I love you,” Charlie replied snuggling in closer.
After a couple of minutes he remembered his bag of goodies. “Oh I picked you up some snacks in case you are hungry?” He began emptying them out onto the bed. Nick looked hungrily at the Oreo dairy milk bar so Charlie opened it and broke off a piece, carefully popping it in his mouth for him to suck. Nicks eyes went to the lump still inside the bag and he raised his eyebrows. Charlie blushed, “oh..I saw this and it reminded me of you,” he stammered out, he felt silly doing this in front of Sarah, but Nick didn’t seem to care. He carefully opened up the bag and broke out into a big smile. “Oh,Charlie that’s so sweet,” Sarah cooed, her eyes lighting up at the sight of her 17 year old son cradling a teddy bear so gently. Charlie blushed a deeper shade of red. “It just looked all sad by itself at the checkout….so ……yeah.” He finished.
Nick stared at it and then at Charlie. “Th….th….thanks.” He said quietly. Sarah squeaked with surprise. “I don’t think I’ll ever take for granted anything you say again baby.” She chuckled, as her eyes filled with tears again. “They are happy tears I promise,” she said as she noticed nicks concern. “I’m just so happy to hear you speak sweetheart.”

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Sarah entered her son’s new hospital room on the HDU. Nick was still under close care but he wasn’t in ICU anymore. He wasn’t receiving life saving care anymore. Sarah held on to that tightly. She was no longer coming to the hospital day on day, hoping and praying that this would be the day that her son would open his eyes. She was not living with the constant fear that her son was going to die anymore. Nick still had a long way in recovery to go but the main thing was he was alive and awake and he was going to be just fine in the long run. Sarah pumped some sanitiser into her hand, greeted the charge nurse and popped in to Nick’s room. He was sleeping soundly. The nurse had informed her that Nick had another peaceful night. It was day 5 since he’d come out of his coma. He was still sleepy but not just as much as he’d been. Sarah sat down next to the bed. It was still early. It was only just gone 8am. She always liked to be at the hospital first thing. She’d let Nick sleep a little longer until the nurse came around for the his morning obs. Sarah pulled her book out of her bag and started reading.

“Mum?” Sarah glanced up from the book at the soft voice of her youngest son, she popped the bookmark in between the pages and sat it down on the side. “Good morning, sweetheart.” She smiled. “Sleep well?” “Y…yeah.” Nick replied as he twirled his finger around the IV cannula in his hand. His mind elsewhere. Sarah noticed. “Don’t play with that, baby.” She scolded gently as she placed her hand on top of his, forcing him to make eye contact with her. “What’s going on in that head of yours, eh?” She asked. She could tell by the look in his eyes that he was thinking of something. Nick blinked as he looked up at her. “Why…why am I here?” He asked. His pronunciation was definitely improving although his sentences were still slow and slurred at some points but he was defitnely speaking more. Much to everyone’s delight. Sarah frowned. “You know why Nicky…” she replied. “You were in an accident.” “I…I don’t know what happened.” Nick replied. He’d tried to remember. He has tried his hardest to remember what happened that night but his mind was just blank. Sarah sighed. She hasn’t been completely honest with Nick about what happened because in all honesty, she just wanted to forget it, but she knew that was wrong and that she was being selfish. “You were hit by a car baby…” she said softly. “Do you remember anything about that day?” She asked. Nick’s eyebrows knitted together. “The last thing I remember was talking to Charlie on the phone…” he said softly. “That’s good baby.” Sarah smiled. That had happened. Nick had called Charlie to let him know that he was leaving and would meet him at the bus stop. “We…we were going for dinner…I think.” Nick continued. Sarah nodded. “That’s right…for your anniversary.” Nicks eyes lit up. “One year anniversary as boyfriends.” He smiled. “That’s great baby.” Sarah beamed. “Do you remember anything else??” Nick sighed as his face fell and he shook his head. “No…” he sighed again. “It just goes dark after than…then I remember waking up in hospital.” Sarah reached out and squeezed his hand. “You were hit by a car just at the bottom of River Crescent…the driver was going almost triple the speed limit. He mounted the pavement and hit you from behind.” She explained watching as Nick desperately tried to remember. “The driver sped off after he hit you.” “He just drove off?” Nick asked. Shocked. Sarah sighed and nodded. “Don’t you worry baby. The police caught up with him. He isn’t getting away with hurting you.” “I…I wish I could remember.” Nick sighed. Sarah squeezed his hand again, encouragingly, although a big part of her was glad that her son didn’t remember the horrific ordeal. “Was I really unconscious for 5 weeks?” Nick asked. “Yes.” Sarah said. “The longest worst 5 weeks of my life.” She said growing teary. “I thought I had lost you, darling.”

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Nick felt exhausted. The last couple of days had been a lot. Well not a lot for anyone else, but to him. He was knackered. The last few days had consisted of morning physio, speech therapy and then afternoon physio therapy sessions. It took a lot out of him and then he’d spend the rest of the day napping. He was awoken by rustling around in his room. He blinked his eyes open to see one of his nurses, placing his dinner tray on the table. “Dinner-time Nick!!” He announced cheerily. Nick blinked tiredly as Ben raised the bed with the control panel. Nick gave a disgusted look at his dinner tray. The meals on the hospital ward were becoming more and more unappetising. Nick decided to avoid his lumpy mash potatoes and inedible looking sausages and beans and reached for the dry bread roll, taking a nibble off the corners in a lame attempt to satisfy his nurse as he left the room. The rest of his tray consisted off a fruit cup andsome apple juice.

“That looks rank!” Nick’s head snapped up in the direction of the voice, only to see his brother standing in the doorway wearing a smirk on his face.

“It is rank.” Nick replied as he took a sip of his apple juice, stabbed at the sausage with his fork, pulled a face and pushed the tray away. David chuckled at his younger brother’s antics as he entered the room, placing a bag on Nick’s bed. “Well good thing your big brother had other plans.” He smirked as he pulled out 2 individually wrapped Greggs sausage rolls and a pink jam donut. Nicks favourite. Nick’s eyes lit up at the sight of proper food. “How did you sneak this in?” “Wasn’t hard.” David shrugged as he pulled out another sausage roll and unwrapped in holding it out towards the one that was in his brother’s hand. Nick instantly got the message and unwrapped his own before tapping it against the other savoury treat, flaky pieces of pasty crumbling on to the bed. David made a mental note to clean it up before the nurses saw as they had this strict rule about no outside food on the HDU. “Thanks.” Nick mumbled as he took another bite. This was exactly what his body had been craving. The sausage was still warm but not piping hot and the pastry was golden, flaky and perfection. Nick’s eyes said it all as he devoured it. “That good, eh?” “You try being fed hospital muck for almost 2 weeks.” Nick retorted as he polished off his sausage roll. He glanced around his tray for something to wash it down with. His eyes falling on the apple juice. David followed his gaze and smirked reaching in to the bag again and pulling out a cold can of orange Fanta and handed it over. “What else have you got in there.” Nick rolled his eyes as he immediately cracked open the can and the fizzy drink instantly satisfying his thirst. It tasted amazing. “Not much…brought you some snacks for later though.” He shrugged. “Why?” Nick asked. “Because hospital food sucks…thought we’d already clarified that.” David said. “No, why are you being nice?” Nick asked. “Do I need a reason?” David asked. Nick shot him a questionable look. “You’re in hospital..” David replied. “I am well aware of that.” Nick replied cockily as he crossed his arms over his chest. David rolled his eyes. “I don’t think you realise how bad things were Nicky…” David sighed. “They thought you were brain dead…they uh…they were going to pull the plug.” Nick swallowed a lump that had formed in his throat. He knew it had been bad, Sarah had told him as much, she’d obviously forgotten that vital detail. “So you got uni leave or something?” Nick asked. David gave him an awkward look and shifted his gaze to the floor. “Oh uh about that…” he mumbled. “What?” Nick asked confused. “I may on an attendance probation.” David admitted. “What? Why?” Nick asked. “Because I’ve sort of not gone back since your accident.” David explained. “I think I’m on the verge of being kicked off my course.” He shrugged. “David!” Nick retorted. “You have to go back! You’ve worked too hard.” “I had to be here. Mum was falling apart and you were in a coma.” The elder Nelson replied. “Sorry.” Nick replied sarcastically. “I didn’t mean it like that.” David sighed. “Mum needed me. I needed to be there for Nellie whilst mum was practically living at your bedside.” “I didn’t know you cared so much.” Nick replied. “That’s not fair Nick..” David replied. “You’re my little brother. You almost died. I was terrified.” Nick glanced up at his brother. He’d never seen David so genuine, so full of emotion. “I’ve been such a fucking knob to you.” The elder of the pair said quietly. “You really didn’t deserve that. I’m sorry.” Nicks eyes grew wide. He honestly can’t remember ever hearing David apologise in his life. Not sincerely. “Let’s not do this.” Nick said softly. He didn’t want it to be awkward for either of them. “I just want you to know that I’m going to try and be better. Okay?” David said. “I want to be a better brother. Just let me try, ok?” Nick glanced at him and could tell he was being serious. “On one condition.” “Yeah?” “You apologise to Charlie, too.” Nick said firmly. David glanced up to him. “Deal!”

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Charlie entered Nick’s hospital room. He smiled as he saw that Nick was sitting on the arm chair in the corner of his room, instead of being cooped up in bed. “Look who’s out of bed.” He grinned. Nicks head shot up instantly at the sound of his boyfriend’s voice and he smiled widely. “Hi..” “Hi..” Charlie smiled as he bent over and placed a kiss on Nick’s lips. “How was pyshio?” “Tiring.” Nick sighed. “I went a walk around the ward and I’m buggered.” He groaned. “You walked?” Charlie grinned, wide eyed. “Like unaided?” “Yeah.” Nick smiled. “Although it took me about an hour.” “Nick!!” Charlie beamed as he sneak hug attacked his boyfriend. “That’s amazing! You’re amazing!!” He exclaimed. Nick chuckled as he leaned in to the hug. “I only went for a walk.” “You don’t know how amazing that is to hear.” Charlie told him. There was a time that he didn’t think Nick would walk again. There was a time that he didn’t think Nick would do anything again so any step, no matter how little it seemed, deserved to be congratulated. He had his Nick back and he couldn’t be happier.

“Sooo…” Charlie said as he scooted in beside Nick on the big armchair that was only designed for one but was big enough for both of them. “Soooo?” Nick smiled as he leaned his head on Charlie’s shoulder. “The gang have asked when they can visit?” Charlie asked. “Oh…” Nick said softly, forcing a little smile but Charlie could tell that it was pushed. “Nick?” He asked. Nick glanced up at him. “It’s just weird having visitors. I….i don’t know…it makes me feel weak.” “You are not weak, not in the slightest.” Charlie replied, shocked that Nick was thinking that. “You’re the bravest person I know…” “Char, you’re just saying that…” Nick replied. Charlie shook his head. “No! You’re not allowed to say mean things about my strong, brave boyfriend.” He replied firmly. “Honestly, Nick. I’m so proud of you. You’ve been through so much and you’ve taken it like a champ. I’m proud of you and so are our friends..”. Nick smiled softly. “Okay…I guess I have missed them…a lot.” Charlie grinned. “They’ll be made up! I’ll message the group.”

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8 weeks! Eight full weeks since Nick had been admitted to hospital. 8 long weeks. It had been just over 3 weeks since Nick first regained consciousness. Nick was beginning to lose the will to live. He was desperate to go home. He was hoping it would be anytime now. He was feeling ready. He was feeling stronger. His cast on his broken arm was removed yesterday and replaced by a fabric support. It had healed nicely. The only reminder of his horrific head injury was a scar that went behind his ear and under his hairline. He’d had a lot of visitors recently. Including the Paris squad, coach Singh, some of the rugby guys and his Auntie and Uncle. It had felt so overwhelming seeing everyone again. He remembered the concerned looks on his friends’ faces as they bundled into the room. He’d been so scared, it seemed silly now. Within minutes his friends were all treating him like normal. Nobody said a word when he took a while to get his sentences out. They didn’t comment on the scar on his face or that he sometimes looked to Charlie to speak for him. It had been a small slice of normalcy in what had been a fairly horrendous experience all round.
The doctors were pleased with his progress. Now all he needed was to be discharged.
He looked up as his mum entered the room. “Well?” He asked. “What did the doctor say?”
Sarah looked at him and sighed, “I’m sorry baby….” Nick slumped back down the bed. “But I’m ready to go home.” He pouted, crossing his arms, “did you tell them? I can’t believe this. I am fine to go home. I want to sleep in my own bed. I miss Nellie…..”
Sarah held up her hands to hush him, “if you’d let me finish….i was going to say I’m sorry baby but you need to get up out of that bed and help me pack.” She beamed at him and chuckled. “MUM!” Nick cried, “don’t tease me! am I really going home?” He felt suddenly scared of her response and tears sprang to his eyes. “Oh I’m sorry baby, I couldn’t help myself.” She sat down on the bed bedside him. She took his hands in hers, “you are coming home sweetheart. The doctor just signed the discharge papers. I have a long list of instructions and we will need to go to daily physio and speech and language for a little while longer….but you can come home.”
Nick burst into tears, shocking Sarah who quickly gathered his large frame in her arms. “Oh darling, I’m sorry I teased you.” Nick cried into her shoulder for a bit before wiping his nose on his sleeve. “I don’t know why I’m crying,” he said, smiling tearily. “I’m a bit overwhelmed I think.”
Sarah looked at him fondly, “I’m not surprised. It’s been a hell of a few months. I wasn’t always sure we’d get to this day…” she admitted, feeling herself get a bit teary too. “You were so poorly my darling.” Nick looked down at his hands. “David told me…..he said they wanted to turn off my life support?” Sarah nodded, “it was such a scary time. We had to trust the doctors. But I knew you were in there somewhere,”she said stroking his forehead. “And you fought so hard to come back to us. I’ll never take life for granted again. And fair warning, I’m not letting you out of my sight until you leave for uni!”
Nick chuckled, “that’s fair.” He smiled and gave her a hug, “thanks for not giving up on me mum,” he whispered.

An hour later Nick was being wheeled out of his room and towards the lift by one of his favourite nurses, Ben. Sarah was trailing behind carrying a duffel bag full of his things, and a get well soon balloon from his friends. Nick had the little bear from Charlie sitting in his lap. “Well Nick,” Ben said as he deposited Nick on the pavement next to Sarah’s car which she had pulled up to the drop off bay. “It’s been a pleasure. Keep working on those physio exercises yeah? You’ll be back to rugby before you know it.” Nick shook his hand, “thank you.” He climbed carefully out of the wheelchair and into the waiting passenger seat. Sarah busied herself putting all this things in the boot. Nick sent a quick text to Charlie to let him know he was on his way home. Nick opened his window and enjoyed the feeling of fresh air on his face for the first time in a long time. “Ready to go home baby?” Sarah asked him as she put the car into gear. “Yeah,” nick grinned. “Let’s go home.”

Chapter Text

“I can’t believe this is what Darcy wanted to do for her birthday,” grumbled Tao as he sat next to Elle on the bus, which immediately lurched forward, continuing its journey out of Truham. Charlie and Nick were sat behind them, nicks leg was bouncing up and down as he looked out the window at the passing cars. “This is a classic Darcy activity Tao,” Charlie replied. Nick hummed in agreement.
Tao tutted and began chatting quietly to Elle.
Charlie turned his attention to his boyfriend who seemed to be vibrating in the seat next to him. “You ok?” He asked him quietly. Nick turned to him, holding his hand and squeezing gently. “Yeah….course. I’m excited to do this. Bit nervous too….” He admitted with a bashful smile.
Charlie squeezed his hand back. “Yeah I am a bit too. I’ve never been rock climbing before. Have you?”
Nick nodded. “Yeah, when I was in cubs when I was little. We went on a group activity weekend thing. But we were small so it wasn’t a very big drop. This one sounds massive!”
Darcy had googled local activities and been thrilled to find that one of the largest rock climbing and abseiling adventure parks was only a twenty minute bus ride from their town. She had insisted it would be a good bonding activity for them all to do, and as it was her birthday they couldn’t really argue with her. So that was why they were all on the bus on a sunny Sunday morning when they would usually all be asleep, or in Nicks case, at a rugby game. Coach Singh had been a little frustrated that her star player was going to be missing the last game of the season. But it wasn’t a crucial one. They were comfortably mid table this year. So it didn’t really matter what the result of this game was.
Nick sighed. He didn’t want to admit to the group that he was actually bricking it. He’d been terrified when they did the tiny climb at Cubs. He’d cried at the top and Harry had made fun of him for weeks after. But Nick was nothing if not a people pleaser and he wasn’t going to be the reason Darcy didn’t get her fun birthday day out. Besides he was older now. Maybe the fear would have lessened. Isaac had made the sensible to meet them later. Sahar and Imogen couldn’t make it. So it was the 6 of them taking part. Apparently it was a climb suitable for beginners so long as they had a reasonable level of fitness. Nick had poured over the website during the night when he couldnt sleep. It had excellent safety reviews and lots of people had taken the time to leave comments saying how great it was. His stomach twisted at the thought of the morning they had planned.
Darcy and Tara got on at the next stop. “Guys!” Darcy bounced along the bus and sat across from them, Tara hot on her heels. “Im SO excited!!!” They squealed. Tara sat down, putting a calming hand on Darcy’s thigh. “Hi guys,” she smiled. “Everybody excited?” “Yeah definitely,” Charlie replied for everyone. “Maybe not quite as excited as Darcy tho!” They all laughed.
“I am so happy you guys all agreed to come with us. I have always wanted to go rock climbing. It looks so much fun!”
They settled back in their seats and the bus carried on. Soon it was leaving Truham behind and joining the duel carriageway. Nick watched the scenery pass by, ignoring the nervous feeling bubbling up. “How was your birthday yesterday Darce?” He asked.
Darcy grinned, “it was good thanks. My gran spoiled me with some awesome new clothes. Then Tara came over for food and a movie and sleepover.” She leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. “Such a good day. And now this!” They exclaimed dramatically.
Charlie laughed, “has anyone here actually done rock climbing before? Apart from Nick when he was little….”
They all shook their heads. “It says it’s fine for beginners,” elle said. “It looks really fun.”
“Yeah, it actually does.” Tara agreed. “And if it makes Darcy happy then it’s worth it.”
Nick mumbled what he hoped was an enthusiastic agreement. It wasn’t that he was scared of heights. I mean sure he wasn’t the biggest fan of them. But it wasn’t the height that scared him. He just had visions of the rope snapping or a gust of wind sending him crashing into the rocks. He had watched one too many disaster films over the years. Rock climbing usually ended with some sort of horrific injury. He spiralled in his own anxiety for a little while. All too soon Darcy screamed, “we are here!”
Nick looked out the window and saw the bus approaching a large building which looked a bit like a leisure centre. He could also see behind the building a large , man made climbing wall. It was absolutely enormous. “Fuck! We aren’t climbing that one are we?” He exclaimed, eyes wide. “Yes!” Darcy grinned, “doesn’t it look amazing?!”
“Erm….yeah….amazing.” The friends all got off the bus and stared up at the large rock structure. “Surely they won’t let beginners climb that?” Tao looked horrified.
“Oh come on guys. The minimum age is 11. Stop being babies.” Darcy grabbed Tara’s hand and dragged her towards the building where they would check in and have the safety briefing.
Nick felt sick. But he plastered on a smile and followed everyone.
The briefing room was a small windowless one which instantly made him feel claustrophobic. They watched a short presentation on the screen in front of them which really just told them not to be idiots while climbing up a rock. No selfies. Who would want to get their phone out? Nick watched carefully, taking all the safety tips in.
“Ok guys!” The group leader, who didn’t look much older than they did, clapped his hands drawing everyone’s attention.
“Hi everyone my name is Max and I’m going to be leading you guys today. I’ll get you harnessed up and then we will make our way over to the rock face. Any questions before we start?” Everyone shook their heads. Max took time to get everyone in a harness, securely fastened. Charlie grinned at Nick as he was secured in his harness. “I can’t believe we are doing this! It’s so exciting!” Nick smiled back, “yeah, it’s very cool.” He tried to look excited as Max approached him with the harness and secured him in. Nick watched carefully as he tightened the straps to secure him. “There, all set!” Max clapped him on the back.
“Ok, leave your bags here in these lockers and follow me! Let’s do this!” Darcy whooped loudly in response which made everyone laugh and eased nicks tension slightly.
They chatted as they walked over to the outdoor climbing wall. There was an excited buzz of nervous energy coming from them all. Max explained the techniques and how they would be buddied up. One climbing, one at the bottom in charge of keeping the rope tight and secure. “And don’t worry I’ll be here the whole time to make sure you are safe up there.”
It was a large climbing wall so there was room for them to pair up and climb at the same time. Charlie and Nick made their way over to the end climbing route. “You want to go first?” Charlie looked to Nick. “Um, no it’s ok you go first.” Charlie gave him a nervous smile. “Okay! Don’t drop me!” Nick paled. He’d been so worried about himself falling he’d not even considered that he was now responsible for keeping Charlie alive and safe while he climbed what looked to be a mountain in front of him. “I’m kidding!” Charlie saw how nervous Nick looked. “I have good grip, I’ll be fine.”
Charlie began his climb. Nick watched in awe from the ground, his hands holding the rope tightly, releasing the rope as needed and holding it secure. He was glad they’d given them all gloves to wear as he hands were sore already. Charlie was, of course, a natural and virtually skipped up the wall face. He was miles ahead of Darcy and Tao. Tao was not enjoying himself very much. He’d only climbed a few metres and was looking distinctly sweaty.
“Come on Tao!” Charlie shouted to him in encouragement, “the view up here is amazing!”
“I’m trying,” he grumbled. “I don’t have the coordination for this.”
“Oh my god this is so much fun!” Squealed Darcy as she climbed carefully towards the top. Nick smiled at her. Maybe it wouldn’t be too bad.
Charlie reached the summit and looked down to Nick, “babe the view is amazing!”
“Well done Charlie,” max called up to him. “Now it’s time to descend. Nice and slowly like we demonstrated earlier.”
Charlie eased himself down the rock face, bouncing gently against the rocks as he went. He landed with a graceful step to the ground. He turned to Nick, his cheeks were flushed pink, his eyes bright. He looked so happy. “That was amazing!” Max helped him unclip. “You ever thought about joining a climbing club? You are a natural.” Charlie beamed. “Oh, no I haven’t….but maybe. It was really fun.”
Nick pulled him into a hug. “That was insane. I’m so proud of you baby.” He whispered in his ear.
“Your turn now!” Charlie kissed him on the cheek.
Max began to clip Nick onto the ropes. Tao had given up half way up and was making his way back down. Darcy was currently screaming at the top of the wall, “I’m the king of the world! Woohoo!”
“Yes Darcy!” Charlie yelled back. They watched as she made her way down. Slightly less gracefully than Charlie had. But Tara had her held steady.
“Right Nick. Off you go.” Max walked away towards Tao to help him unclip.
“Right.” Nick took a deep breath, placing his hands on the first hand hold. “You’ve got this babe,” Charlie said encouragingly.
Nick looked up. The top seemed an extremely long way away. Right, he thought to himself. One step at a time.
Nick slowly began to climb. He was aware of the sounds of Tara and Elle climbing alongside him and he could hear the encouraging shouts from their friends below. He took each step, found each hand hold. It wasn’t as scary as he was thinking. He felt like he actually might make it all the way to the top. That was until he made the foolish decision to look down to see Charlie below him. Holy fuck he was really high up. He felt the panic swoop in his stomach as his vision blurred. What was he doing this high up? What was he thinking.
He closed his eyes, gripping the hand hold tightly as he tried to regulate his breathing. He heard Charlie calling below him, “keep going Nick! You are so close!” Nick took a deep breath. He could feel his hands shaking as he held on tight. He needed to move. He couldn’t just stay on the wall forever. He forced his eyes open and looked up. He could see a hand hold a little bit above him. He just needed to let go of one hand and reach up.
Slowly he prized his hand off the hold and reached up to grab it. His fingers brushed the plastic handle. He couldn’t quite reach.
Shit.
He tried again, leaning his body up to try and get the extra inches he needed to reach. He managed to get his fingers on the handle. So he let go with his other hand to bring it up to the handle next to it.
He realised half way through his manoeuvre that he had misjudged the situation. His hand grasped at absolutely nothing and he felt his other hand slip off the tenuous grip he had.
He felt an odd feeling of calm as he began to fall backwards. His body went slack as he felt himself tumble for what felt like ages but in reality was only a few seconds before the rope went tight and he went crashing into the rock face. Pain exploded in his shoulder as it took the impact of his body.
Charlie was screaming up at him. He’d watched in horror as he saw Nick reaching for a handle that he could see even from this distance that he wouldn’t be able to reach. His heart was in his mouth as he watched Nicks hand slip and begin to fall. He immediately pulled on the rope hard to stop him but then watched in horror as Nick collided with the rock face.
“Nick!” He shouted up. “Are you ok?”
Max who had been busy helping Tara with her descent was immediately at Charlie’s side.

Nicks breathing was heavy as he came to a still against the rock face. His eyes clenched shut as a burning pain erupted through his left shoulder. He’d never felt pain quite like it and he’d sustained various different injuries over the years as a rugby player but this was different. This felt different. His shoulder felt like it was on fire. Nick could hear muffled chaos below him as his friends shouted in concern and worry but he could barely concentrate as he tried to stop his hands from trembling as he gripped on to the rope. His feet dangling in the open air. He tried to steady his breathing but it was hard to as adrenaline pumped through his body. He tried to block out the pain but it was no use as it was too severe. He blinked as tears pooled around his eyes.

“Nick?” The voice was soft but firm, thick with concern. It was Charlie. Nick immediately felt himself relax as he tried to control his breathing as Charlie climbed to where he was along with Max. “Nick? Are you okay?” Charlie asked. Nick had dropped quite a few metres down the rock face but was still about 10metres off the ground. Max immediately stepped in to action as he brought Nick’s feet to level surface to prevent any further falling or injury. “Nick? Did you hit your head?” Max asked as he unclipped the safety helmet from the teenager, looking for any obvious signs of a head injury. “I…I don’t think so.” Nick mumbled, his words slurred by pain as he had his teeth gritted together. Tears threatening to fall from his eyes. He had never felt pain like this. His shoulder was in agony. He couldn’t move an inch without an explosion of agonising pain. “That’s good.” Max said, replacing the helmet carefully. Ruling out any potential signs of head injury or concussion was a relief although he knew the medical professionals would do all these checks. His colleague had already radioed for an ambulance. “Are you in any pain?” Max asked, although he could tell by the way that Nick’s eyes were clenched shut tightly and his teeth were gritted that the answer was yes. “My shoulder…” Nick breathed out. “I’m here Nick. It’s okay.” Charlie assured him. “What shoulder?” Max asked. “Left.” Nick replied. “It really hurts.” He sniffed. The pain felt like it was Intensifying every second. “Ok, try and not move it too much.” Max instructed. “Helps on it’s way.” He explained “we need to get you down to the ground. I’m going to clip you to me and my colleague will lower us down slowly. Ok?” Nick closed his eyes and nodded. He was in so much pain he didn’t care how he got off this bloody rock. He just wanted to be on the ground again. Nick cried out in pain as he was manoevered over to Max. It didn’t matter what position he was in. It hurt. “Charlie? What’s happened? Is everything okay?” Tao called up from below the the platform. Charlie peered down. “Nick’s hurt his shoulder. I think it’s pretty bad.” He said. “He’s coming down now.” He then glanced at his boyfriend whose eyes were opened wide in fear. “Hey, it’s okay. You’re going to get help okay?” He soothed. He knew Nick hated doctors and hospitals or anything medical like that and knew he was going to freak out when the ambulance arrived but Max seemed pretty concerned about the injury to Nick’s shoulder.
Slowly and steadily max and Nick were lowwered to the ground. Nick gritted his teeth and hissed loudly as the pain shot through his shoulder. But finally he was on the ground and sat, leaning against the wall with his good arm cradling his bad one.
Eventually sirens could be heard in the distance, getting closer and closer. Max glanced at Charlie, placing a hand on his shoulder. “I’m going to go and meet the paramedics, okay? Keep him calm and talking. We don’t know for sure if he hurt his head or not when he fell.” Charlie nodded and watched as Max went to meet the paramedics.

“Okay, Nick is it?” One of the paramedics spoke as he dropped down on to his knees next to the injured boy. Nick nodded softly, chewing harshly on his lip to prevent himself from screaming out in pain. “I’m Stewart and this is my colleague Andy. Can you tell me what hurts?” “Shoulder.” Nick replied, yelping as Stewart gently pressed down on a tender part of his shoulder. Nick’s agonising scream was enough to make Charlie shudder as he kept himself back so that the paramedics could work on Nick but kept himself in sight so that his boyfriend knew he was there. “Sorry about that kid.” Steward replied apologetic. His suspicions were that Nick was sporting a fracture or dislocation to his left shoulder but would need to wait for the hospital to confirm. Steward pulled out a pen torch from his jacket pocked and flicked it on. “Can you follow the light with your eyes.” He instructed as he shone the light back and forward between both of Nick’s eyes, checking for any sign of concussion. He held his finger out, moving it around and asking the teenager to follow it with his gaze before holding several fingers up and asking Nick to tell him how many. He passed all the assessments with flying colours. The paramedics satisfied that there didn’t seem to be any signs of a head injury. “Ok Nick I’m going to administer some pain relief, you’re just going to feel a sharp scratch on the back of your hand, alright?” Andy spoke as he prepared a cannula kit. Nick squeezed his eyes shut. Needles. He hated needles. “Hey Nick.” That was Charlie’s voice. Calm and soothing from in front of him. “You’re doing great…”. Charlie knew about Nick’s phobia of needles. Andy inserted the Cannula and began administering some morphine. “That should take the edge off of the pain, you’re doing really well, bud.” He explained as he removed his gloves as Stewart waited a few minutes for the drugs to begin kicking in before securing Nick’s arm and shoulder in to a sling to
Keep it elevated until they got him to the hospital. “Can I come with him please?” Charlie asked the paramedics, desperate to ride with nick in the ambulance, knowing that the older boy would probably freak out if he wasn’t there with him. “I’m his boyfriend.” Stewart nodded his head. “That’s fine. Do you have a contact for a parent or guardian?” “I’ll call his mum.” Charlie said, getting to his feet as the paramedics loaded nick in to the back of the ambulance.

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“Oh sweetheart..” Sarah soothed as she rushed over to the hospital bed in the triage area of the hospital. She gently hugged Nick, being careful of his sore shoulder. “Mum.” Nick said tearfully as he snuggled in to her embrace. Glad she was here. “I was so worried when I got that phone call baby.” Sarah said pulling back and placing a hand on Nick’s cheek. “Are you okay? You’re not hurt anywhere else are you?” She fussed. “No.” Nick assured her. “Just my shoulder…it really hurts.” He replied, his lip wobbling. “Have they given you anything for the pain?” Sarah asked. “He’s had 15ml of morphine through his IV drip.” A middle aged man replied. He held out his hand. “I’m Dr Thompson, you’re mum I take it?” Sarah nodded as she shook his hand. “Is he okay?” “We’re just waiting on a porter to take Nicholas here round to X-ray so we can get a closer look at this shoulder.” The doctor explained, although he was about 97% sure that the scan would just confirmed his suspicions that Nick’s left shoulder was severely dislocated. “Where’s Charlie?” Nick asked immediately. “He’s out in the hall, baby.” Sarah reassured her son. “He’s just letting his parents know where he is.” Nick nodded, relieved that Charlie hadn’t left him. “What am I going to do with you, eh?” Sarah sighed as she glanced at her son’s bandaged up shoulder as she brushed her hand through his hair. “Permanently ban me from any outdoor activities that involve height.” Sarah chuckled as she stroked his cheek. “Don’t tempt me..”

Nick’s X-ray only took around 15 minutes. He was wheeled back to a side room where he was admitted with more morphine to help the pain. The nurse explained that the doctor would be around soon with the results of the X-ray. Nick felt a bit tired and sleepy due to the morphine so was grateful to be allowed the lay on one of the beds as they awaited the results. “Mum?” He asked softly. “Yes, darling?” Sarah replied as she placed down her magazine. “What if my shoulders broken?” He asked in a small voice. “What if I need surgery?” He questioned, his face turning fifty shades of pale at the possibility. It had been mentioned earlier that given the severity of the injury, surgery may be required. Nick really hoped that was not the case. “Whatever happened, we will deal with it together, baby.” Sarah soothed, squeezing his good hand in a comforting manner. “Your mums right.” Charlie said reaching out and running his hand through Nick’s hair.

“Sorry about the wait.” Dr Thompson announced as he entered the room. “There was a slight delay down in the radiology screening unit.” He explained as he was gripping on to a white envelope. Nick who had been dozing off, snapped his eyes open immediately in hearing the doctors voice. The doctor pulled up a seat and pulled out Nick’s X-ray, wasting no time in getting straight to the point. “The good news is Surgery won’t be necessary.” He said, starting with that as he had sensed his patients anticipation of the possibility of having to undergo a surgical procedure. He could see the look of relief on all of their faces. He held the image up higher so they could inspect it a little closer. Sarah glanced at the image of her son’s shoulder, not really sure of what she should be looking for. “However Nick has popped his shoulder, quite severely actually.” The doctor explained. “More commonly known as a dislocation.” He pointed to the part of the shoulder where the shoulder joint connects with the upper arm. “You can see here the dark area is where the joint has popped out of place.” Nick felt sick looking at the image. “So what happens now?” Sarah asked. “What is the treatment?” “It is a very simple fix.” The doctor explained. “We just realign the shoulder and simply pop the joint back in to place.” He explained. Nick glanced at the doctor. Wy did he have a feeling this wasn’t going to be as easy and as simple as he was making out. “Unfortunately this can be very uncomfortable and painful for the patient but as the procedure itself only takes about 10 to 15 minutes. General anaesthetic isn’t required. Pain relief and gas and air will be provided to ease the pain and discomfort.”

Sarah nodded and the doctor and glanced at her son who looked even paler than before. She reached out and squeezed his hand. “It’s ok Nicky.” She soothed. “I’ll be right by your side.” She then glanced at the doctor for approval. The middle aged man smiled and nodded. “Absolutely. I know it’s a frightening thought but you will feel sudden relief as soon as that shoulder is popped back in to place. You will also feel less pain and discomfort. What do you say?” Nick swallowed the lump in his throat. He was completely bricking it at the thought of his shoulder joint being forced back in to place whilst he was vey much awake but the alternative was being put to sleep and he really did not want that so he found himself nodding his head softly. What the heck was he getting himself in to?”

Charlie was asked to wait outside. Which he did reluctantly. He really wanted to hold Nicks hand but he understood that he would be in the way and that Sarah needed to be with him. He made his way down the corridor to the waiting room where he was surprised to see Tao, Elle, Tara and Darcy taking up a row of seats, all looking apprehensive as they spotted Charlie.
“How is he?” Darcy looked on the verge of tears. “It’s all my fault!” She cried. “I shouldn’t have suggested this as a birthday activity.” Tara squeezed her hand, “it was an accident babe, it’s not your fault.” She turned to Charlie. “Is he ok?”
Charlie sighed but nodded, “he will be ok. He’s got a nasty shoulder dislocation so he’s in a lot of pain. The doctor is realigning it now. Then he should feel better apparently.” The group all looked relieved. “That sounds painful though,” Tao admitted. Charlie slumped down next to him, “yeah it’s going to hurt apparently. They are giving him gas and air.”
“Can he come home?” Elle felt so sad for Nick, he was the one who was worried about the activity and he ended up being hurt. “Yeah I think once they have done it he can go home. Probably have to take it easy for a bit.”
“Think he’ll still be up for a McDonald’s?” Darcy didn’t want to celebrate without him. “I’m not sure,” Charlie answered, “let’s see how he goes.”

The doctor gave Nick a minor sedative to calm him down and then handed him the gas and air. “Pop this in your mouth and suck hard on it. You need to take a decent amount in for it to take effect.”
Sarah held his hand on his good arm, “I had gas and air when I was having you,” she smiled “it’s good stuff. Makes you feel a little dizzy though so no quick movements,”
Nick took a deep breath in using the gas and air and was immediately hit with a wave of dizziness. He felt almost drunk, it was a weird feeling. He was vaguely aware of the doctor taking his arm and lining himself up. A nurse was behind him to hold him in position.
“Ok, right, on the count of 3….1,2,3….” The doctor twisted Nicks arm and Nick screamed out as pain exploded from his shoulder. It felt like his bones were snapping and grinding as the doctor manoeuvred his shoulder into the correct position. Nick took more of the gas and air to try to take the pain away. He felt the moment that he managed to realign it as the shoulder joint clicked into place and the stabbing pain stopped, replaced with a burning ache which was much more tolerable.
“Aha! There we go,” the doctor announced triumphantly. “Well done sweetheart,” Sarah rubbed his arm gently. That should feel better.”
Nick nodded shakily, putting the gas and air down. He felt a bit queasy, the adrenaline leaving him.
“Ok nurse, if you could strap his arm up for me into a sling. I’m happy that we are done here.” He turned to Sarah as Nick was obviously not focusing. “Keep up with the pain medication every 4 hours. We will send through a follow up appointment in a week or so just to check it’s all healing as it should. Keep the sling on until then and no sports.” He looked at Nick with a smile, “best stay clear of rock climbing for a little while,”
Nick gave him a small, slightly green smile. “Thank you,” he said softly. “It feels a lot better now.”
“My pleasure,” the doctor said before sweeping out the room to go and deal with the next casualty waiting for him.
“Well, Nicky,” Sarah smiled at him. “How are you feeling now?”
Nick looked at her, grimacing slightly as the nurse finished placing his arm in the sling. “A bit sore. But surprisingly not too bad?” The gas and air was wearing off quickly and he actually felt a bit hungry. “I could eat lunch…”
Sarah laughed loudly. “That’s my boy,” she joked. They made their way to find Charlie and were instantly surrounded by his friends, all talking over each other to see how he was doing. “Guys I’m fine,”he chuckled. “Thanks for coming to check on me.” He looked at Darcy. “I’m sorry I ruined your birthday.”
Darcy looked at him like he’d grown a second head, “you’re sorry? I’m sorry I suggested climbing in the first place! I feel awful.”
Nicks eyes widened, “it was my own fault. I panicked. Please don’t blame yourself.”
Darcy smiled tearily at him. “Ok. Same goes for you though.” He smiled back at her.
“Right!” Sarah clapped her hands. “This one is hungry apparently. Have you all eaten yet?” They all shook their heads. “We’d planned to go to McDonald’s” tao admitted “but we didn’t want to go without Nick.”
Sarah looked at her youngest. “What do you think Nicky? Fancy a burger?”
Nick grinned, “yes! I’m starving!” Everyone laughed. “Ok, I can fit 3 more of you in my car along with Nick, why don’t we order a Deliveroo to our house so Nick here can rest comfortably.”everyone nodded their approval at the plan “My mum is on her way,” said Elle, “she can drop me and Tao round.”
“Perfect,” Sarah beamed.
“I’ll text Isaac and let him know to meet us at yours Nick,” Charlie said.
Nick gently held Charlie’s hand as they walked to Sarah car. Charlie glanced up at him, “thanks for keeping me calm up there,” Nick said quietly to him. “I was really scared.”
Charlie squeezed his hand back. “I’m
Just glad you are ok, please don’t scare me like that again.” Nick smiled. “I’ll try.”
They followed the rest of the gang to the car park and into the two waiting cars.
Once back at nicks house, they all made a big fuss of getting nick comfy on the sofa with a ridiculous amount of cushions. Sarah watched fondly from the doorway. She was beyond grateful for the new group of friends her son had made over the past year. He was in good hands.

Chapter Text

Nick shoved the last of his belongings in to his case before zipping it up and collapsing on his bed with an exhausted sigh. They were leaving for Paris early in the morning. He was so excited. Five days in Paris with Charlie and his friends. No parents. No curfews. Well apart from Mr Farouks all lights out by 11pm rule, but he was getting to share a room with Charlie - along with Tao and Issac but five full days of sleeping next to Charlie. He could hardly wait. The only downside of the trip was Ben was going. Why? Nick had no idea. Ben didn’t even take French. This was clearly just another way for him to harass Charlie. He had another thing coming. Nick was excited to visit Paris again. It has been at least 3 years since he’d visited. The last time, his father dropping the bombshell that he was engaged to re-marry. Three years on and Nick is yet to be introduced to Martine- his new stepmother. Did his father even want him to meet her? Nick was determined to meet up with Stéphane during this trip. Desperate for his dad to take even the slightest bit of interest in his life. He wanted to come out to his father, he wanted to introduce him to Charlie. Being in Paris for almost a week was going to be the perfect oppurtunity.

Let’s just stay low key in Paris. Then it will be the summer holidays. We can just be us.

Charlie’s voice echoed in his head. The conversation they had after returning home from the end of exams bonfire last. Night. Nick was still mortified at how the night had ended. Charlie having to call Sarah to pick them up because he had felt too poorly to walk home. Nick had felt so ill and it had all been down to the stress and anxieties of coming out. Why was he finding it so difficult? He’d told his mum no problem and she had been absolutely over the moon for them both. Telling Tara and Darcy had been a piece of cake along with the rest of their friends. He was so so happy with Charlie, being his boyfriend. He felt like his real self. So he didn’t understand why he was so afraid of people knowing that.

Nick was snapped out of his train of thought by a light tapping on his bedroom door. “Come in..” He called and smiled as Sarah walked in carrying a mug of steaming warm tea. “Im going to head to bed shortly, darling.” She smiled as she set it down on Nick’s nightstand. She let out a little sigh as she darted her eyes around her son’s bedroom. What a mess. She hoped he was going to tidy it up before leaving in the morning. “All packed, Nicky?” She asked, gazing down at his suitcase and backpack. Hoping he had packed sensibly. “Yep.” Nick replied as he pulled himself in to a sitting position, reaching out for the mug of tea but was cut off guard by an irritating cough in his throat which he caught in his elbow.

“Nicky? Are you feeling ok?”

Sarah frowned at the sound of her son coughing…again. “You’ve been coughing an awful lot today..” She commented as she sat down next to her son on his bed, extending out her and to feel his forehead. Nick, quickly realising what she was doing, pulled away in retreat and rolled his eyes. “Mum I am fine.” He replied. “I feel fine..” He hoped that would be enough to convince her but his body had other plans as it rebelled against him as let out another cough that then escalated it to a fit. It sounded a little chesty. Sarah wasn’t impressed, nor she was convinced with her son’s adamant plea that he was feeling ‘fine’. “You don’t sound fine.” She told him, firmly. “I don’t like the sound of that cough, Nick.” She said adapting a serious tone. “Maybe going to Paris isn’t the best idea.” She said hesitantly. “Especially if you’re coming down with something.” Nick’s face fell and his eyes widened in shock. There was absolutely no way that he was pulling out of the trip. Especially when there was zero reasoning for it. He was completely fine. Nothing more than a little cough that would probably disappear by the time he even arrived in Paris. “Mum!!’ He exclaimed. “No way..” “Nicky…”. “No! I am not missing Paris all because of a little cough.’ He replied stubbornly.

‘Baby it sounds more than just a little cough.” Sarah replied. She didn’t want to ruin Nick’s fun but she also didn’t like the idea of her son travelling to Paris without her when he was feeling under the weather. What kind of mother would that make her? “You’re overreacting.’ Nick scowled. He couldn’t believe they were having this conversation. “You were feeling poorly last night.” Sarah replied, reminding him that she had to pick him up 2 hours before curfew because he had a headache and felt like he was going to throw up everywhere.

“That’s completely different.” Nick hit back. This was ridiculous. Yes, he felt ill last night, but not because he was physically unwell but because the reality of coming out to his mates and the rest of the world is absolutely terrifying him. “Baby, I don’t want to be unfair.” Sarah said, adapting a softer tone as she reached out and brushed the hair away from his face, using this as a sneaky attempt to check his temperature. There was a little warmness against his skin, but nothing to be too worried about. “I’m just worried..” She added. Nick breathed out a sigh. He didn’t want to argue with his mother. They didn’t do it very often but it always left him feeling completely shitty afterwards, but he also didn’t want anything come between the Paris trip. “I know you are…” he said quietly. “You don’t have to be, though.” He assured her. “I feel fine…I promise.” Sarah sighed. She knew her youngest son could be just as stubborn as her a times. “Let’s see how you feel in the morning, okay?” She said simply, knowing there was no point in getting in to an argument right now. Maybe all Nicky needed was a good night sleep. “Don’t stay up too late.” She warned him as she bent over and placed a gentle kiss on his forehead. Nick gave her a small smile as he gulped down the ret of his tea before laying down beside Nellie who was curled up beside him on the bed, snoring softly. He had nothing to worry about. He would feel right as rain in the morning.

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Nick did not feel right as rain when he woke up. His alarm snatched him from his slumber as it was blaring at 6am. The coach would be leaving Truham just after 7am. Nick groaned as he pulled himself in to a sitting position. His chest felt heavy and tight and his throat was dry and raw from coughing most of the night. His chest ached whenever he breathed in too hard. He just generally didn’t feel good at all, but he knew he absolutely could not let on to Sarah. She would forbid him from going to Paris and he didn’t want that. He pulled himself out of bed, picking up his phone and glancing at the stream of notifications form the group chat with his friends.

Charlie: MORNING!!😄
Darcy: Hip-Hip-Hooray. ITS PARIS DAY! 🥳
Tara: Is everyone else as excited as me?
Elle: YESSSSSS! 🙌🏼
Tao: For Paris. YES. For sitting on a crowded bus for over 6 hours. NO😫
Issac: I am! I have 3 books packed for the journey🙌🏼
Tara: 3???😲
Issac: What? Should I have packed 4?
Tara:🙈🙈
Charlie: I cant wait!!! 🥳
Elle: I am so excited to view the sites of Paris❤️
Sahar: Me too! 🥳
Nick: Buzzing! Paris here we come 😃

Nick then placed his phone back on the nightstand before grabbing his towel and heading in for a shower. Hoping the steam would make him feel a little bit better. He showered, brushed his teeth and got ready in comfy joggers, a plain white t-shirt and left out his favourote teal green sweater out to throw on over the top. He would be sitting on a coach for hours. He wanted to be comfy. He then grabbed his suitcase and backpack and made his way downstairs. Nellie happily greeted him at the kitchen door like she did every morning. Nick grinned as he bent down on his knees and ruffled her fur. “Morning Nellie girl!” He grinned. He was going to miss her. He wasn’t used to going for more than a day without seeing her yet alone five.

“Morning Nicky.” Sarah smiled as she placed a cup of tea on the dining table next to a plate of blueberry pancakes. Nick’s favourite. “How are you feeling?” Nick let out a small smile. She hadn’t missed a beat. “Fine..” He replied, shooting her his most convincing smile. Sarah grimaced slightly at the slight hoarseness in Nick’s voice. “Are you sure?” She asked. “Mh-hm.” Nick replied as he sat down and made quick work of his breakfast. Sarah watched as her son literally hoovered up his pancakes like a human vacuum. There was definitely nothing wrong with his appetite, that was for sure. Maybe she was overreacting? but she has also heard him coughing numerous times during the night. She also knew though that if she stopped Nick going on this trip, he probably wouldn’t talk to her. She knew she had to trust him. “You promise me the second you fee any worse you’ll let me know?” She told him. “Or at least Mr Farouk or Mr Ajayi?” Nick’s eyes lit up. She was actually letting him go? This had been a lot easier than he had thought. “You’re letting me go?” He grinned as he stood up and quickly hugged her. Sarah laughed softly as she returned the hug, glancing at her son as he pulled away. “I need you to be smart about this, Nicky.” She warned. “If you start to feel poorly. You need to tell someone, Ok?’ Nick nodded. “I will…”

Sarah smiled, satisfied with his answer. She then reached out to the counter, retrieving some items she had fished out from the medicine cabinet early hours this morning. “Just in case.” She said handing them over. Nick glanced down at the lemon and honey cough drops and the unopened box of cold and flu tablets and rolled his eyes before slipping them in to the front pocket of his rucksack. “Thank’s mum.” Sarah smiled as she ruffled his hair. “Now drink up your tea before we end up late..”

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Nick grinned as he spotted Charlie, after saying a tearful goodbye to his overbearing mother and Nellie who just looked up to his with her big brown eyes, having no idea that she wasn’t going to see her Nicky for 5 long days.

“Hi.” Nick said approaching his boyfriend.

“Hi…” Charlie replied.

“Are you sure about the whole keeping us a secret thing?” Nick asked. He hated the fact that he was making Charlie hide and keep their relationship a secret again. He just wasn’t ready yet to come out properly. “Yeah.” Charlie nodded. “We probably shouldn’t sit next to each other on the coach either…people might talk.’ He said. Nick felt his stomach sink. He hadn’t thought about that part. He had been sort of looking forward to sitting with Charlie for the journey as well. “It could be fun…being a secret again.” Charlie grinned, nothing Nick’s sad face. Nick forced a smile on to his face. “Yeah..” He agreed. Charlie smirked and shot Nick a wink. “I bet you cant last longer than two days without kissing me..” He challenged. Nick scrunched up his face and let out a sigh. “Is that a challenge I hear?” He smirked. “Maybe..” Charlie chuckled as they approached the front of the coach where they were greeted by their two teachers.

Charlie decided that he would sit with Issac which left Nick wandering the aisle trying to work out where to sit as there weren’t very many free seats as everyone was sitting next to who they wanted to. Nick had desperately wanted to sit next to Charlie but that wasn’t happening. He spotted an empty seat next to Tao and headed over. He smiled at the other boy who jut rolled his eyes and let out a sigh. Nick also sighed himself as he sat down. This was going to be a long journey. Nick didn’t know what he had done to Tao but for some reason, he just didnt seem to like him very much. Nick popped his earphone into his ear and sent another text to his dad. He’d mentioned to Stéphane last week that he was visiting Paris and it had actually been his dad’s idea that they should meet up when he’s there so nick was just reminding him. He sent the text and leaned back in his seat, closing his eyes. The ache in his chest felt greater than this morning. He tried to ignore it. Nothing was going to spoil this trip.

The hum of the bus engine vibrated through Nick, each cough sending a sharp pain through his chest. He tried to be as discreet as possible. He stared out the window, the white cliffs of dover shrinking into the distance, replaced by a grey choppy sea. He usually loved trips like this, looking out the window, seeing all the scenery. It remedied him of visiting Paris as a child. Today, his lungs felt tight and a heavy weight pressed down on his chest. He coughed again, stifling the sound with his hand, hoping no one noticed. He didn’t want to worry anyone, let alone Charlie, who was sat a few rows back next to Issac. The stuffy air on the bus didn’t help. Each bump in the road sent a fresh wave of discomfort through him He closed his eyes again. Trying to focus on his breathing, trying to block out the block out the smell of diesel and the excited chatter around him. Just a little bit longer. He thought to himself, willing the tightness in his chest to ease. He felt a tap on is shoulder. “You okay Nick? You look a bit pale?” Tao said, his brow furrowed in what looked like genuine concern. Nick forced out a smile as he blinked his eyes open. “Oh yeah, I’m fine.” He replied. “I just didn’t sleep that great last night.” He lied. Hoping Tao would buy it. Tao didn’t look convinced at all. “Are you sure? You kind of look a little feverish.” He commented, Hoping the older boy was not contagious. The last thing he needed was Nick Nelson infecting him with whatever plague he was sporting. “Maybe you should tell one of the teachers?” He suggested. Panic flared in Nick’s chest. Telling a teacher meant, phoning Sarah and potentially being sent home before they even arrived. He couldn’t miss Paris. “No, no, I’m fine…honestly.” He lied, once again. “Just a bit of a headache.” Lying was becoming easier and easier. “I will take some paracetamol when we get there.” He promised. Tao just nodded, buying his story. “Ok, but if you feel worse let me know okay? Or at least give me warning if you’re going to barf on me..” Nick couldn’t help rolling his eyes as he let out a little chuckle and closed his eyes once again, hopefully a little Nap would help him feel better. He allowed himself to fall in to a light slumber as the coach continued it’s way along the busy roads.

He was woken later by Tao gently nudging him in the side. “We are here,” Tao stood up to retrieve his bag from the overhead compartment. Nick groaned as he rubbed his eyes wearily. The nap had not made him feel any better. His chest felt tight and sore. His head was pounding and he felt a bit sick. He took a small breath as he forced himself out of his seat which immediately started a round of coughs. His eyes watered as he reached for his water bottle and took a shaky sip, letting the cool water soothe his sore throat. Tao watched him in concern, “you sure you are ok?” I can get Mr Ajayi?” Nick shook his head vehemently. “I’m fine,” he rasped, he reached into his bag and took out the throat sweets his mum had given him and popped one in his mouth. Tao looked unconvinced but decided to just keep an eye on him for now.

It was unseasonably warm as they descended the steps of the coach and Nick was immediately hit with a wall of heat. He peeled off his hoodie and stuffed it in his bag before heading to collect his holdall from the underneath of the coach. Charlie was already there, chatting with Isaac. He looked up as Nick approached. “I’m so excited!” He grinned at Nick who smiled back. He was determined to have a good time on this trip. “Yeah me too.” Charlie studied his face, “you ok? You look a bit pale….and sweaty?” Nick chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand, “gee thanks! I’m fine, just a bit coach sick I think. Glad to be off it.” Charlie nodded, grabbing his suitcase from the pile. “Let’s go find our room.”
Nick followed along behind trying really hard to stop himself from feeling completely miserable. There was no denying it, he felt like shit. Trust him to come down with a bug. His phone vibrated in his pocket, he fished it out hoping to see a text from his dad, but it was a just a message from his network provider welcoming him to France. He sighed and pocketed it. They made their way up to their room. He just wanted to get in, have a lie down on his bed and chill.
Opening the room they all stopped dead in the doorway. Two beds. Two small double beds. Nicks eyes immediately went to Charlie. Would he want to share with him? Before he got a chance to say anything Tao and Isaac each claimed a different bed. He gave Charlie a sad look and plonked his bag down on Isaac’s bed. He then headed for the bathroom and shut the door. He splashed some water on his face. The room was spinning slightly and he gripped onto the sink. He felt himself tear up. ‘God get a grip,’ he chastised himself. He really wanted his mum. He tried to give himself a pep talk before going out to join the others.

“We have to go down for dinner,” Charlie said as Nick joined them. “Ok,” he stifled a cough. Charlie reached over and felt his forehead. “You feel a bit warm? You sure you are ok?” Nick nodded, “yeah I’m fine. Might take some paracetamol before we leave though.” Charlie watched as he popped a couple of pills into his mouth and swallowed them. He wasn’t convinced and shared a look with Tao who also looked a little worried. “Come on then…” Nick headed out the door not leaving any room for arguing.

2 hours later and Nick was regretting his life choices. The paracetamol had barely taken the edge off. He was definitely running a temperature and his chest was hurting a lot. He was finding it harder and harder to stop himself from coughing. They were in a small restaurant just round the corner from the hotel they were staying in. It was loud, busy and full of the smells of food and Nick just wanted to get out. He had pushed his food around on his plate, but his appetite was non existent. He half listened to the conversations going on around him but suddenly an intense bout of coughing took him by surprise. He could hardly get any air as he coughed and coughed. His eyes were streaming and his lungs were burning. He felt a hand in his shoulder and could hear the concerned voice of Mr Ajayi, “easy Nick, have some water,” he passed him a glass of water which he took with shaky hands. The liquid soothed his throat slightly, just enough for him to take some much needed air. As his coughs subsided, mr Ajayi took him by the arm and led him out into the fresh air. He took small shallow breaths as his throat calmed down. “Sorry,” he managed to wheeze out. Mr Ajayi looked at him with concern, “nick that cough sounds terrible. Are you ok?” He nodded, “yeah, I just have a bit of a cold and I think the food went down the wrong way….” He lied convincingly. “Hmm, ok. Do you want to go back to the hotel to rest a bit?” Nick sighed in relief, he really did want to go and lie down so he nodded. “Ok I’ll see if one of your roommates wants to go with you. Charlie’s in your room isn’t he?” At Nick’s nod, mr Ajayi disappeared, returning quickly with a worried looking Charlie. “Hey, you ok? You want to go back to the room?” Nick nodded again, he didn’t have the energy to say anything. “Charlie, take Nick back to his room. Are you ok to stay with him? We are almost finished up here but I’d rather he wasn’t left alone.”
“Of course,” Charlie rubbed his arm, “come on, let’s get back. “
They walked quietly round the corner to the hotel. Nick stopping every few steps to cough into the crook of his elbow. Charlie was worried about him. He knew Nick didn’t like to make a fuss but he sounded really poorly.hopefully a lie down would help.
Eventually they made it back to their room and Nick collapsed onto the bed with a sigh. He didn’t even bother to take his shoes off. “Nick!” Charlie chuckled at him. “Get into your pyjamas at least.” He hauled him off the bed and towards the bathroom. While Nick brushed his teeth and got ready for bed, Charlie opened the window to let some fresh air in. He rummaged in his bag and found some cold and flu tablets and a fresh water bottle. He tidied up the bed and got it ready for Nick. As Nick left the bathroom his eyes softened as he saw Charlie plumping up his pillow. Charlie blushed as he realised Nick was watching him. “Come on, in you get.” Nick gladly slid under the covers. He was shivering slightly, despite the heat. The rooms weren’t air conditioned and it was a warm night. Charlie handed him the medication and water which he took thankfully. Charlie stroked his fringe out of his eyes and Nick leaned into his cool touch. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly, “I didn’t mean to ruin your night. “
Charlie smacked him gently on his shoulder, “don’t be ridiculous. I’m sorry you feel so poorly.” Nick closed his eyes, “just sleep for a bit. I’ll be here”
Nick nodded off. Charlie watched him sleep, his breathing was raspy. He sounded like he was getting a chest infection. He sent a text to Tao and Isaac to let them know to be quiet when they came in and he got ready for bed. To their credit they came in silently and got ready for bed in the bathroom, all taking care to let Nick sleep. “Isaac do you want to trade beds?” Charlie asked. At Isaac’s raised eyebrow he continued, “not like that! It’s just if he’s poorly it might be better if I’m sharing with him?” Isaac agreed and they switched places for the night. Nick was on his side, breathing heavily, but asleep and Charlie allowed his eyes to close.

He woke up in the middle of the night and it took him a few minutes to realise where he was, as he looked up at the unfamiliar ceiling. He turned to his side and saw Isaac fast asleep with a book still in his hands, Tao next to him snoring quietly by the window. He turned to the other side to see if Nick was still sleeping peacefully and was confronted with an empty bed. He could see light coming from underneath the bathroom door and he could hear the sounds of the shower running. But his heart sank as he realised that what most likely woke him was the sound of coughing. Harsh, hacking coughing that didn’t seem to stop. Immediately he was out of bed and knocking gently on the bathroom door. “Nick,” he whispered. “Can I come in?” The only answer was more coughing. So he carefully opened the door and his heart broke at the sight in front of him. The shower was running hot, creating steam in the room but it was having little effect on Nick who was on his hands and knees on the floor, coughing and coughing. His face was ashen, his lips faintly blue as he struggled to get any air in. There were tears in his eyes and he looked up at Charlie as he opened the door with terror in his eyes. He tried to take a breath but he just couldn’t stop coughing. “Oh my god Nick!” Charlie raced over to him. He leaned behind him and turned off the shower. He placed a gentle hand on Nicks back to try to comfort him, “breathe sweetheart, come on.”
Nick tried. He tried to calm his cough but he couldn’t do it. He could see black spots in his vision as he struggled to take in air. Charlie screamed out, “Tao, Isaac, get help.”
Tao, who had woken at the commotion appeared in the doorway with a look of horror on his face. “Shit, what happened?”
“I don’t know but he can’t breathe Tao, get help.” Tao immediately raced to get a teacher. Isaac looked on worriedly. Nick continued coughing, his vision blurring as he tired. He reached blindly for Charlie’s hand, who took it and squeezed it tight. “We are getting help, just hang on ok?”
Mr Ajayi and mr Farouk came running into the room, mr Farouk was clutching a first aid kit which he chucked on the bed as he realised the seriousness of the situation. “I’m calling an ambulance,” he said as mr Farouk bent down next to Nick. “It’s ok Nick, help is coming. Try to breathe for me.”
The friends watched in horror as mr Farouk rattled off instructions in French to the operator on the phone. Nicks eyes were unfocused, his face was turning a scary shade of grey. His coughs were weakening but he was clearly still not getting enough oxygen in. As the room became even more busy with the arrival of the paramedics his grip on Charlie’s hand slackened and he slumped to the side. “Nick!” Charlie screamed.
“Ok, everyone out of the way,” the paramedic shouted. He spoke in English, already aware that these were English students he was dealing with. He knelt down next to Nick and began his examination. He tried to jostle Nick awake, alarmed by the colour of his face. His colleague placed an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, “we need to get him into hospital, his oxygen levels are far too low.”
Charlie stood back watching in shock as the lifted Nick onto the stretcher. His eyes fluttered open, looking around wildly in panic.”it’s ok Nick, they are here to help you.” He tried desperately to reassure him. He must be so scared. He quickly grabbed nicks phone and handed it to him, he needed to be able to keep in touch with him. Check he was ok.
Nick could feel the oxygen squeezing into his clogged up lungs. It made it slightly easier to breathe, but still a struggle. He wanted his mum. Or even his dad. He lived in Paris, maybe he could come? Mr Farouk followed the paramedics as they made their way to the lift “I’ll go with him, I’ll call his mum on the way to let her know what’s happening.” He looked over at Mr Ajayi, “it makes sense that I go as I speak French. I can make sure Nick knows what is going on”
Nathan nodded, putting an arm around Charlie’s shoulder who was white with fear. “Ok, keep us informed ok?”
“We need to get going,” the paramedic said curtly, “I’m worried about his oxygen levels.” They wheeled him into the lift and the doors closed. Nick turned to Mr Farouk, mumbling under his mask. “Sorry lad I can’t understand you.” Nick took a shaky hand to his face and pulled the mask off long enough to wheeze out, “my dad….lives….in….paris….” Before the paramedic moved his hand out of the way and snapped the mask back in place. Nick allowed his eyes to close as he was jostled along the corridor and into the ambulance. Mr Farouk was relieved to hear that he had a parent in the city. He wouldn’t have to face a hospital visit without one of his parents.

Charlie, Isaac and Tao stood together in shock. How had things got so bad so quickly? “I don’t understand,” said Tao shakily, “he said he was fine.”
Charlie’s eyes shone with tears, “he’s not fine though is he,” Charlie was cross. Why hadn’t nick been honest with them? They could have got him help sooner and maybe they wouldn’t be racing him into hospital struggling to breathe. Mr Ajayi ushered them back into their room. “ I know this has been a shock boys, but you need to try to get some sleep. I promise I’ll let you know if I hear any news. His phone started to ring and he answered it quickly. “Youssef, everything ok?”
The boys watched on, was this about Nick? “Oh that’s excellent news,” mr Farouk replied to whoever was on the phone, “send me the contact details and I’ll phone him now. You phone his mum.”
He hung up. “Apparently nicks dad lives in France, I’m going to call him so he can meet Nick at the hospital.” He looked relieved. Charlie looked at Tao and Isaac. “Did you know his dad lives in paris?” They all shook their heads. It was good news although Charlie had a nagging worry. Why hadn’t he mentioned his dad lived here?

Nathan stepped back into his own room and sat on the bed to call Stephane Fournier. It rang and rang and went to voicemail, so he tried again. After the third time of trying he decided to leave a voicemail asking him to call and saying it was urgent regarding his son Nick. He also sent him a text message asking him to phone him. Sighing he put his phone down. This was not how he had excepted their first evening in Paris to go. He was exhausted already. He hoped Yousef was getting on ok at the hospital.

Youssef followed behind as Nick was wheeled into the hospital. He’d been hooked up to an IV for fluids and was receiving much needed oxygen. He looked poorly. A nurse and doctor met them as he was wheeled into a space in the emergency room.

“qui est-ce?” (Who is this?)
“Nicholas Nelson, 16 ans, est ici en voyage scolaire. Il a du mal à respirer, tousse beaucoup et a perdu connaissance. Il a reçu des perfusions et de l'oxygène.”(Nicholas Nelson, 16 years old here on a school trip. Difficulty breathing, coughing a lot and lost consciousness. He’s had IV fluids and oxygen.)

The doctor turned to Nick and Youssef, switching to English. “Hello, I’m Dr Henri, I’m just going to give you a quick examination ok?” Nick nodded tiredly. He didn’t have the energy to speak. Youssef took the time to step outside to speak with Sarah Nelson. He took a breath as the phone rang. It was the middle of the night and she was most likely sleeping. She answered with a sleepy “hello?”
“Mrs Nelson?” He heard the sounds of her waking up, clicking on a bedside lamp. “Yes, who’s this?”
“I’m so sorry to wake you, I’m Youssef Farouk one of the teachers on the Paris trip…”
“Is Nicky ok?” Sarah’s voice was more clear now as the adrenaline woke her up. Getting a call in the middle of the night from the teacher on a school trip was never going to be good news.
“I’m afraid Nick isn’t very well.” Sarah breathed slightly easier. She knew that boy was getting a cold. He probably just needed permission to give him some stronger medication. “Oh I told him he looked peaky before he left, but he wouldn’t have it…..does he need some medication?” Youssef paused. “Um I’m afraid it’s a little more serious. He was having trouble breathing so we’ve taken him to hospital just to be on the safe side.” He heard Sarah’s gasp of breath. “Oh my goodness. Um….i should be there. Is he ok? Oh he must be so frightened….”
Youssef tried to stop her spiral. “I think it might be a good idea for you to come. He is going to need to go home once he’s well enough. But we understand his father lives in Paris? We are contacting him so he can be with him until you are able to be here to get him home.”
Sarah tried to keep calm. Panicking was not going to help. Calling Stephane was a good idea. He wouldn’t let Nick down when he was in hospital surely. “Yes ok. I’ll look into the best way to get to Paris.” She spoke with nicks teacher for a little longer before she hung up. Nellie was laid at the bottom of the bed looking at her with her big brown eyes. “Oh Nellie, our boy is poorly. We need to get him home don’t we?”
She tried to think. What was the best way to get there? Flying was quickest. But then how was she going to get Nick back home again. If he was poorly he wouldn’t want to be on public transport. Driving was her best option. She brought up google to find out times and available for the Eurostar. There was space on a train but it wasn’t leaving until late in the afternoon. She sighed. She didn’t have any other option so she booked the space and glanced at the clock. It was 3am. Far too early to phone her sister to ask her to take the dogs for a few days. She laid back down. Sleeping was going to be impossible while she worried about Nick. So she got up, found her small suitcase and started to pack a few bits in case she had to stay.

Back at the hospital Nick was admitted. “It looks like pneumonia,” the doctor said to Youssef whose eyes widened in surprise. That was serious. “What happens now?” He asked. “We will keep him here until his oxygen levels improve. We have him on antibiotics and fluids. He needs rest. Are his parents coming?”
“His mum is arranging travel from England. We are trying to get in touch with his dad, who lives here in Paris,”
“Ok, well visiting hours are 2-4 and 6-9. We will look after him. Do we have your details in case we need someone nearby?” Youssef was reluctant to leave Nick on his own but he knew that he needed to rest. He left his details with the receptionist and sent a text to Nathan to fill him in. He then grabbed a taxi back to the hotel and arrived back as dawn was breaking. He scrubbed the sleep from his face as he trudged up the stairs to the room they shared. Nathan was awake and got to his feet quickly. “How is he?” His face paled as he heard the latest update. “I can’t get through to his dad.” He sighed, glancing at his phone again, willing it to ring.
“He’s probably asleep. As soon as he gets your message I’m sure he’ll be calling straight back.” Nathan nodded, “yeah I’m sure you are right. He’s his dad after all. He will want to be here for him.”

The sterile smell of the hospital hung heavy in the air. Nick lay in the narrow, single, hospital bed, hooked up to an IV drip, his chest was tight with each shallow breath as the antibiotics pumped through his body. Pneumonia. The doctors were saying, and it had hit him hard. The doctors had insisted on admitting him as left untreated pneumonia could be fatal. Nick hated hospitals. Everything felt so cold and impersonal. The sterile smell, the white walls and bright lights. Being at hospital in general sucked, but being in hospital in a foreign country hundreds of miles away from home, from his mum, dogs and the comfort of his own bed sucked ten times worse. Luckily he had been placed in a singular room. His immune system was clearly compromised and the doctors worried about him picking up any further germs or infection.

Nick felt awful. He was exhausted. His chest ached and his skin felt on fire as the fever coursed through his body. He couldn’t believe this had happened. He was supposed to be at the hotel, enjoying being in Paris with his friends. Getting excited to explore the sights of the beautiful city, once again, but instead he was stuck in hospital. He felt so poorly and scared and alone. My Farouk had stayed by his side the whole time from being in the ambulance, to being examined and then being admitted. How embarrassing. He was for sure going to be the talk of the school. Being whisked into hospital because his lame lungs were being over dramatic. Mr Farouk had to go back to the hotel so he was alone. Nick didn’t like being alone.

🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂

The last thing Youssef had been expecting upon entering Nick’s hospital room first thing was the nurse towering over the teenager after just removing a digital thermometer from his ear, a worrying look plastered on her face as she tutted at the reading. Mr Farouk had wasted absolutely no time in getting at the hospital bright and early.

“Is everything ok?” He asked, his voice thick with concern. Nick was a student under his care and was seriously unwell. The whole situation was stressful. The nurse turned to look at Youssef and sighed before dunking a washcloth cloth in to a bowl of cold water and dabbing it across Nick’s forehead and the crease of his neck. He was sleeping. His sleep was restless as his chest rattled as he let out shallow, raspy breaths. “His temperature has spiked dangerously high.” The nurse explained. “The doctor is concerned that the antibiotics aren’t working.” Youssef’s eyes widened. What did that mean? “So what happens now?” He asked, glancing at Nick and back at the nurse. “The doctor will be around soon. It will probably be a case of switching out the antibiotics to a stronger kind. We want to carry out a chest x-ray.” The nurse secured a blood pressure cuff on Nick’s arm. “He’s had a bit of a restless night.” The nurse admitted. “Any news on mum? He’s been asking for her.” Youssef let out a little sigh, feeling even more terrible for Nick than he already was. It must be rotten falling so unwell, especially being away from home, away from his family. Even as a grown adult, at the grand age of 36 years old, when he was unwell, he wanted his own mother. “His mum is on her way, however, she’s driving from England so she probably won’t be here until late afternoon or evening.” Youssef explained. “What about dad?” The nurse asked, her English was very good. She was quite young, couldn’t be any more than 22/23. Probably not long out of medical school. He shook his head. Youssef shook his head. “My colleague is still trying to reach him. Nick’s going to be alright, yeah?” He asked. His voice laced with worry. “We just need to get his breathing under control and find an antibiotic that works.”

🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂

Nathan sighed as he reached Stèphane Fournier’s voicemail for the twelve time. Why wasn’t he answering? Last night, he understood. He’d probably have been sleeping, but it was now 8:30 in the morning. One more time. He’ll try one more time before he has to go downstairs and update the students. Nathan placed the phone against his ear, expecting to be met with voicemail again but to his surprise he was met with a gruff, french voice.

“Bounjour, qui est-ce?” (Hello, who is this?)

Nathan cleared his throat. “Hello, am I speaking with Stéphane Fournier?”

“Qui.”

“This is Nathan Ajayi. I’m one of your son Nicholas’ teachers chaperoning the trip to Paris.”

“Je vois. Que puis-je faire pour vous?” (I see, what can I do for you?)

“I’m afraid Nick isn’t very well. His mother informed me that you are living here in Paris..”

“Oh mon Dieu, quelle malchance. Est-ce qu'il va bien ? Il y a une vilaine grippe qui circule en ce moment...” (Oh dear, that's rotten luck. is he okay? there is a nasty flu going around at the minute...)

“It’s a little more complicated than that.” Nathan said as he swallowed a lump in his throat and continued. “Nicholas is in hospital…”

“À l'hôpital ? Pour quoi faire ? Tu as dit qu'il était malade... à quel point?” (Hospital? Whatever for? You said he was sick…how sick?). Stéphane sounded generally concerned on the phone.

“He came down with a bad cough, we initially thought was a chest infection…last night he was struggling to breathe so he was admitted in hospital.” Nathan explained, trying not to leave out any important details.

“une toux ? Vous m'avez vraiment inquiété pendant un moment, monsieur Ajayi. Je prends juste du repos et des médicaments, oui ?” (a cough? you had me really worried for a moment there, mr ajayi. i take it just rest and medicine, yes)

Nathan paused for a moment, shocked at how un-concerned Nick’s father appeared at the mention of his condition. Maybe he didn’t realise how bad things were. “Nick has pneumonia..” he said bluntly. “He really is, quite poorly..”

“pneumonie ?? comment a-t-il attrapé une pneumonie ! il a 17 ans...” (pneumonia?? how has he got pneumonia! he's 17 years old..)

Nathan frowned slightly. He was almost completely certain that Nick was sixteen, not seventeen. Shouldn’t a father know this? Although this has probably came as a massive shock to him. “His mother is travelling from England but she’s driving so as you can imagine it will take her some time…Nicholas is unwell and frightened, he really needs a parent’s presence.” It concerned him that Stéphane wasn’t rushing right to the hospital. If Nick was his child. He would be there in a flash.

“quel hôpital?” (“What hospital?”)

“Saint-Louis..”

“je serai bientôt là. merci. au revoir..” (I will be there soon. Thank you, bye)

Chapter Text

Charlie stared at himself in the mirror as he brushed his teeth and pulled on his shirt. He hadn’t slept. Not after Nick had been rushed to hospital. How could he? He just couldn’t stop replaying the events in his head. Finding Nick. What if he hadn’t woken up? It wasn’t worth thinking about. It had been horrible, watching Nick’s body go limp as he struggled to breathe, the grey colour of his skin and blue tint to his lips. How had he gotten so sick?

“Charlie are you okay?” He opened the door to reveal a worried looking Tao. “Yeah…” he mumbled. He wasn’t. He was far from it.

“We better go down for breakfast. Everyone will be wondering where we are..” Issac said, tucking his book under his arm. Charlie sighed. The girls didn’t know yet. Nobody knew. Only them and the teachers.

Charlie entered the busy breakfast lounge, met with loud chatter. He overheard Harry greene explaining how he had heard an ambulance during the night. “It was crazy loud, deffos someone in this hotel..” he said. “I heard that too.” Tara spoke up from where she was spreading Nutella on to a pancake. Charlie felt a chill run down his spine. “Where’s Nick?” Darcy asked, instantly noticing the absence of their ginger headed friend. “Oh no is he still feeling poorly?” Elle asked, genuine concern on her face. “Yeah, he didn’t look very well at dinner last night.”

“Nick’s in hospital.” Charlie blurted out, just as Mr Ajayi came up behind him ready to inform the group on what had happened.
“What?” Darcy shrieked loudly. The others looked shocked and concerned. “What happened?” Tara asked, her eyes wide with concern.
“Oh my god. It was Nelson in the ambulance?” Laughed Harry, causing Mr Ajayi to glare at him until he shrank back down to his seat.
“Everyone, can I have your attention?” Mr Ajayi called out, the room quietened down, the students all keen to hear what had happened to cause Nick to be in hospital. “Now, as some of you are aware, we did need to call an ambulance for Nick last night. He became poorly in the night. Mr Farouk is staying with him until his mum can arrive from England, so we’ll be one adult down today. I trust you can all be sensible and stay out of trouble during our trip into the centre of Paris.”
“Is he ok?” Imogen asked quietly, her eyes wet with tears. She hated to think of Nick being poorly enough to need an ambulance. Nathan’s eyes softened as he looked at her. “I can’t discuss his medical conditions with you, I’m sure you understand. But he’s in the best place and being well looked after. His mum is on her way.” Imogen nodded her understanding, biting her lip to prevent her from crying. “Ok, meet in the reception area in half an hour. Make sure you have your water bottles, it’s hot today.” Everyone returned to their conversations with friend groups, Charlie could hear nicks name being whispered nearby. “Mr Ajayi?” He looked over. “Can I visit Nick?” Nathan softened as he looked at Charlie’s worried face. He wasn’t daft, he knew something was going on between the two boys. The hushed whispers as they ate in the art room, he could have sworn he saw them holding hands at one point. He sighed, “I’ll see what I can do Charlie.” He patted him gently on the shoulder as he left to phone Youssef. Surely by now his dad would be with him, he could ask him if he wouldn’t mind a visit from Charlie.

Stephane Fournier swept into the hospital reception area and strode determinedly to the desk.
“je suis ici pour voir mon fils, Nicholas Nelson,” (I am here to see my son Nicholas Nelson) he checked the time on his watch. He had a meeting this morning, he was hoping he could still make. The receptionist directed him up to Nicks room on the second floor and he made his way there quickly, taking the stairs two at a time. As he approached the room he saw a man standing in the doorway tapping furiously on his phone. He stopped and pocketed his phone as Stephane neared him. “Mr Nelson?” Youseff asked, holding his hand out to shake it. “It’s Fournier. Stephane Fournier,” he replied curtly, shaking his hand. “You are Nicholas’ teacher?” Youssef nodded, “how is Nick doing?”
“He’s asleep at the moment, he didn’t have a very peaceful night. The doctors are still trying to get his oxygen levels up so that he can travel home. I know his mum is on her way but he’s been asking for you as well .” Stephane raised his eyebrows, “for me?” He smiled a tight smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, “ah he was always such a mummy’s boy.” He brushed past Youssef and entered Nick’s hospital room. Nick was sleeping restlessly in bed, his oxygen mask was strapped tightly to his face. He was still receiving fluids through an IV. His forehead was sweaty and his skin pale. He looked poorly. Stephane walked to the edge of the bed and gingerly put his hand on Nicks shoulder, “Nicholas,” he said as he gently nudged him. Youssef was surprised that Stephane had decided to wake Nick up, but he guessed he wanted him to know that he had arrived. He stood awkwardly in the corridor, unsure if he should leave and return to the students now that nicks dad had arrived. He cleared his throat, “I will leave you two to it now? I’ll come and check on Nick later.” Stephane waved his hand to show he understood, effectively dismissing the teacher. Youssef walked down the corridor towards the lift, he had a strange, uneasy feeling in his stomach about leaving Nick, but surely he’d be fine with his dad.

Stephane shook Nicks shoulder again a little more roughly. Nick let out a groan and immediately began to cough in his mask. He opened his eyes blearily. It took him a moment to realise where he was. The room was so white. The unfamiliar beeps and noises around him were confusing. He could feel oxygen being forced into him through the mask, it felt uncomfortable. He was completely exhausted and confused about what had woken him up. Until he turned his head to the side and saw his dad peering down at him. “Ah, you are awake, how are you feeling?” Nick tried to sit up slightly. It was a little unnerving seeing his dad after so long. When was the last time he’d seen him? Must have been the flying visit he had to the UK almost a year ago. But he was glad he was here, it was frightening being poorly in a different country. He was happy that he could have his dad until his mum could come and get him. “I’m ok,” he wheezed out, coughing again. Stephane reached for his water and passed it to him. He removed his mask just long enough to take a few precious sips, then he placed it back over his mouth. The ice cool water soothed his sore throat. “Thank you for coming,” he said quietly.
“Of course,” Stephane said, “I was worried when I got the call from your teachers. It is good to see you are feeling better already.” Nick wasn’t sure he felt better but he didn’t want to argue.
A doctor came by to check on Nick. He took readings and began conversing with them in English before Stephane interrupted him.
“je suis française et mon fils est à moitié français. nous n'avons pas besoin que vous parliez” (i am french, and my son is half french. we dont need you to speak in english. )
The doctor smiled and filled Stephane in on Nicks condition. Nick listened as much as he could but he was exhausted so he let the words wash over him. He dozed as they chatted, only opening his eyes once more as the door clicked shut.
“So your mum is on her way,” Stephane said, “I sent her a text to say I had arrived. She is getting the Eurostar later today. She will be here this evening.” Nick smiled and sank back into the pillows. “That’s good,” he rasped out, coughing again.
Stephane checked his watch, “you will be ok until she arrives yes?” Nick looked at him confused. “You’re not staying?” Surely his dad wasn’t leaving already. He’d only just arrived. “Unfortunately I have an important business meeting this morning. I should be able to pop back this afternoon. The doctor said you are stable. You just need to rest and you’ll make a full recovery.”
Nick felt his eyes well up with tears. His dad wasn’t leaving him here on his own surely? He swallowed before answering, “please don’t go,” he whispered, blinking back the tears. He knew his dad didn’t like it when either he or his brother cried.
Stephane sighed, “I am sorry, I would stay if I could. But this meeting has been scheduled for months and the gentleman I’m meeting flies out again tomorrow.”
Nick couldn’t believe what he was hearing. His dad’s meeting was more important than him. He turned his head away from his dad and closed his eyes, ignoring the tear that fell onto the pillow beside him. “Fine, see you later,” he said quietly.
Stephane hesitated. “I will be back as soon as I can.” He squeezed Nicks shoulder before leaving, racing down the corridor towards the stairs. If he was quick and got a taxi he could still make his meeting. He dialled his secretary to tell her he was on his way.

Nick listened to his dad’s retreating footsteps and let the tears that had been threatening fall. He was alone in hospital. He wanted his mum. He wanted Charlie, he wanted someone to hold his hand and tell him everything was going to be ok. He willed himself to calm down, he could hear his heart rate was increasing, the beeping on the monitor was getting faster.

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Sarah had sighed with relief when she read the text from Stephane. She was so pleased that Nicky wasn’t alone in hospital. But still, she wanted to be with him as quickly as possible. She’d dropped the dogs off at Diane’s and was on her way down to Dover to join the Eurostar. She’d left plenty of time before her booking at 4pm. She couldn’t believe this had happened. She knew he was poorly, despite his insistence that he was completely fine. She should have pushed harder to get him to stay home. But she knew deep down that there was no way he’d have ever agreed to that. The important thing now was to get him home so he could recover and get better. She tapped her hand on the steering wheel as she joined the motorway. She wouldn’t be able to relax until she was at the hospital holding his hand.

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Nathan was surprised but pleased to see Youssef approaching them as they disembarked the coach at their first stop. “You’re here!” He said, relieved that he didn’t have to wrangle all the teenagers on his own. “How’s Nick?”
“His dad arrived, so I left them to it. Didn’t think I should stay.” Youssef answered. Truthfully he wasn’t sure about Stephane Fournier. He had a bad feeling about him. Nathan smiled, “that’s great.”
Charlie raced over when he saw Mr Farouk talking to Mr Ajayi. “Is Nick ok?” He blurted out. Youssef nodded, “his dad is with him.” Charlie smiled, that was good news. He quickly went to tell the others the news, before deciding to text him. He wasn’t sure if Nick would be on his phone at all but he hoped he would feel well enough to check it at some point. He was also still hoping to see Nick later on this afternoon.

Charlie: I really hope you are feeling better, is your dad looking after
you? I am going to try and visit you later. Miss you, Paris is no fun without you ❤️

He sent it and watched to see if Nick was online. The message delivered but was left unread. He sighed. Hopefully Nick was sleeping.

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Nick stared up at the ceiling. He was trying to take it one breath at a time. But truthfully he was really frightened. The doctor had said he just needed to take it easy while they figured out the right medicine to help bring his fever down. And that his lungs just needed a bit of extra support. They were hopeful he wouldn’t need the oxygen for too long. But Nick just felt sorry for himself. He turned his head to the side and reached for his drink, noticing for the first time that his phone was sitting on the side beside him. He vaguely remembered Charlie thrusting it at him when he was being taken out in the ambulance. He reached for it and was mildly horrified to see how many messages he had received in the past few hours. It seemed everyone on the Paris trip knew he was in hospital. That was extremely embarrassing. He scanned through a few of them before spotting a message from Charlie. He read it, his heart skipping a beat as he read that Charlie was going to try and visit this afternoon. God he wanted Charlie here to make him feel better like he had after the disastrous bonfire celebrations a couple of days ago. He hesitated. Should he reply and tell him that his so called dad had bailed on him already? He didn’t want Charlie to worry. He settled on slowly typing out a short reply.

Nick: I’m doing ok. Everything is under control here. Can’t wait to see you later xx

He also saw a text from his mum saying she was on her way and to hold on, which he hearted exhaustedly.

A little later as he was dozing in his bed the doctor reappeared.
“How are you feeling Nicholas?” He began his checks, frowning at the temperature and oxygen levels.”
“I’m a bit tired,” Nick admitted, coughing into his mask again. The doctor hummed in sympathy, “I’m not surprised. Can I have a quick chat with your dad? I would like to try a different medication so I’d like to run it past him.”
Nick closed his eyes and sighed, “he had to go to work.” He said quietly. The doctor’s eyebrows raised so high they almost disappeared into his hairline. “Ah. Ok. Is your mum here yet?” Nick shook his head miserably. The doctor looked horrified. He couldn’t imagine leaving his own child alone in a foreign hospital. No work meeting was more important. He took a breath before continuing, “ok not to worry. We can sort something out. Are you ok in here in your own?” Nick nodded his head, the doctor could see he was on the verge of tears so didn’t press the issue. “My friend might visit this afternoon, is that ok?” He asked quietly. The doctor smiled, “of course, that’s a great idea.”

Lunch in the hospital was fairly miserable. Nick had no appetite at all and picked at the sandwich he’d been given by a kind nurse. His lungs still felt clogged up and having the mask off to breathe was uncomfortable so eventually he gave up and pushed the tray away. He leaned back against his pillow and sighed for what felt like the hundredth time that day. He closed his eyes and tried to doze for a bit. It really was horrible being here on his own. He briefly wondered if his dad would turn up this afternoon. Part of him hoped he wouldn’t as he was still really pissed off that he didn’t stay. But still, it was his dad….and deep down he still wanted him here.

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Charlie and Mr Ajayi walked into the hospital reception. Charlie was so grateful that mr Ajayi had managed to find a little time in their schedule to leave the group and come and see Nick. He’d texted him a few more times but hadn’t heard back. Hopefully he was resting. Charlie was a bit nervous to meet Nicks dad. He obviously didn’t know they were a couple. Nick had never really mentioned his dad. How should he act with him? He approached Nick’s room nervously. They were stopped in the doorway by the doctor who was just leaving his room. “Ah you must be Nick’s friend. He’ll be very pleased to see you.” Mr Ajayi shook the doctor’s hand, “I’m one of Nicks teachers how is he doing?” The doctor smiled, “he’s doing ok. His oxygen levels still need a bit more improvement before he can come off the mask. I think it’ll do the world of good for him to see you, he’s been a bit lonely.” Charlie did a double take as he heard that. “Isnt his dad with him?” He blurted out, before blushing at how he just interrupted their conversation. “His father didn’t stay. Apparently he had to work.” The doctor struggled to keep his voice level. It wasn’t his job to interfere in their family dynamics even though he was not impressed with Mr Fourniers level of parenting.
Charlie looked at Mr Ajayi, horrified. So Nick had been all alone all day? In hospital by himself? Mr Ajayi looked equally upset. “Charlie, why don’t you go and sit with him while I discuss some things with the doctor.”
Charlie didn’t need to be told twice. He opened the door and stepped in, his heart softening at the sight of Nick sleeping. He had a hospital gown on, and a thin scratchy looking blanket up to his waist. The mask on his face looked uncomfortable and Charlie stepped closer to get a better look. Nick looked poorly. He had a frown on his face, his breathing was laboured and more shallow than it should be. Glancing behind him he could see that the adults were busy chatting, so he risked picking up Nicks hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.

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He must’ve managed to sleep because the next thing he knew he felt the pressure of someone squeezing his hand. He blinked his eyes open tiredly and smiled for the first time since he’d been admitted when he saw Charlie peering worriedly down at him. He managed to give his hand a squeeze back. “Hi,” he rasped, sounding quiet under the mask. “Hi,” Charlie replied back with a sad smile. “How are you feeling? I’ve been so worried about you.” Nick leaned back against his pillow, “I’m ok. Really tired.” Charlie nodded in understanding, his thumb gently stroking Nicks. “What happened with your dad?” He asked. He couldn’t imagine his own dad leaving him alone in hospital like that. His family drove him crazy with their meddling, but he never doubted that they loved him and would turn up for him if he landed himself in hospital.
Nick closed his eyes. “He went to work,” he said flatly. “You never mention your dad,” Charlie said carefully. “He isn’t a big part of my life any more I guess.” Nick replied quietly, “he left when I was little and moved back to Paris. He has a whole life here I don’t know about. But I thought he might stay with me…..I guess he had more important things to do than stay….” he stopped, rubbing his eyes roughly to stop the tears. Charlie was immediately incensed with a man he’d never met for making his boyfriend so sad. He thought of Sarah, travelling as fast as she could to be there for her son. And his dad couldn’t even reschedule a meeting in his own town. His thoughts were interrupted by a fit of coughs. He handed Nick his water and gently rubbed his back as he sipped it carefully. “I’m sorry,” he said eventually as Nicks cough calmed down and he laid back, thoroughly exhausted. “Your mums on her way though right?” Nick nodded, “yeah her crossing is soon. She will be here this evening.” Charlie was relieved. He hated the idea of Nick spending so much time here alone.

Visiting hours were over far too quickly and Mr Ajayi appeared at the door to retrieve Charlie. “I wish I didn’t have to go,” he said sadly. Nicks bottom lip wobbled under his mask as he replied, “i wish you didn’t have to go either.”
“I’ll text you later ok?”
Nick nodded. Charlie leaned over and kissed his forehead, ignoring the knowing look from his teacher as he left the room. “His mum should be here in a few hours,” Nathan said as he looked back into the room. Nick looked really young, and he was struck by the fact he was still only 16. Poorly in a foreign country. He couldn’t believe that his own dad hadn’t stayed with him. If they’d known, one of them would have returned to the hospital to keep him company. He was angry that not,only had Mr Fournier abandoned his son, he hadn’t let them know so that they could come and be with him instead. “Come on Charlie,” let’s go and find the others. I think they are getting ready for dinner.” Charlie reluctantly followed, already texting tao and Isaac with an update on Nick.

Charlie and Mr Ajayi entered the busy restaurant only a few blacks away from the hotel. Everyone had ordered and were hungrily tucking in to their meals, chatting away, apart from Nick and Charlie’s friends who quietly picked at their food, overwhelmed with concern and worry. They couldn’t believe that Nick had become so poorly that he had been rushed to hospital in the middle of the night. He must be so frightened.

Mr Farouk spotted them entering the restaurant and got up, approaching them right away. He could sense by the look on his colleagues face that something wasn’t right. Had Nick taken a bad turn? Surely not. Nathan wouldn’t have left. “Is everything ok?” “Charlie why don’t you grab a seat with your friends and we will get you some food ordered.” Nathan said as he picked a menu up from the side. Charlie sighed but nodded, the last thing he wanted to do was eat, but he also knew that the adults had to discuss what had happened at the hospital. Charlie couldn’t believe that Nick’s dad had just left him like that, knowing how poorly he was. What kind of parent did that? It wasn’t right. Charlie slumped down in a chair next to Tao at the end of the table and let out a heavy sigh. His friends attention was immediately on him.

“What’s wrong?”

“Is Nick okay?”

“Has something happened, Charlie?”

Charlie took a deep breath before explaining the events of the afternoon to his friends group.

“His dad just left him??” Mr Farouk asked Mr Ajayi. He couldn’t believe what he had just been told. He had sensed a strange vibe from nick’s father when he had met him earlier that day. Something had seemed off but he had thought nothing of it and just pushed it to the back of his mind because Stéphane is Nick’s dad. He’d look after him. He should have acted on the first alarm bells when Stéphane had got Nick’s age wrong but he hadn’t thought much of it. “Why did he leave?” “He had to go to a work meeting..” Nathan seethed. Youssef looked outraged. Work? “His son has pneumonia and is in flipping hospital..” He exclaimed. “Youssef..” Nathan said slowly as he placed a calming hand on his shoulder, aware that they were attracting attention from other diners. “So Nick has been alone all afternoon when we thought he was with his dad?” He sighed. He felt sick to his stomach at the thought of his student being alone, sick and scared. Nathan nodded. “I had to bring Charlie back but I reckon one of us should go back, at least until Sarah arrives..”

“I’ll go.” Youssef volunteered. The thought of Nick being alone a second longer was unacceptable. He just hoped for his own sake and Stéphane Fournier’s sake that they don’t cross paths with each other again or he won’t be accountable for his actions.

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Sarah ran as fast as her legs would take her down the hospital corridors. Saint Louis hospital was massive. She’d only ever stepped foot in the building once before. Years ago, when the boys were little. David had fallen off the monkey bars in the play-park and had required stitches in his forehead. It hadn’t been the family holiday they had planned and it had been the last before the divorce. Come to think of it, it was probably the last time Sarah had visited Paris. Nicky had only been four and a half at the time. Sarah was panting breathlessly by the time she reached the nurses station. “Im looking for my son Nicholas Nelson. I believe he’s on this ward.” She spoke slowly being mindful that she was in a different country and that the receptionist may not understand but to her relief, she did speak English. She smiled warmly at Sarah as she typed something in to her computer. “Ah you’re young Nicholas mother? He’s been waiting for you.”

That sentence alone was enough to break Sarah’s heart. The very thought of her child, poorly in a foreign hospital, wanting her was too much to bare. “I got here as quickly as I could.” Sarah replied. “I have been worried sick. How is he? Is he ok?” She rambled on, she was just desperate for some peace of mind that Nick was okay. “I’m not qualified to discuss the condition of patients.” The receptionist apologised. “Nurse Camille here will take you to your son and fill you in.” She smiled softly. Sarah returned the smile. The lady behind the desk was just doing her job.

“Bonjour.” Sarah greeted the nurse. Camille held her hand out and smiled softly. “I am fluent in English.” Sarah breathed out a sigh of relief as her French was very rusty. “Nicholas has been expecting you.” She smiled as she lead Sarah along the corridor. “How is he?” Sarah replied quickly. “His temperature is still alarmingly high and he is receiving oxygen through a NG tube to assist with breathing. The doctor switched out the antibiotic this morning to a stronger kind with a steroid..Nick still isn’t responding, although sometimes these medicines take time to take effect..” She updated the worried mother as they arrived outside an alarmed door. The nurse swiped her keycard and punched a digit in to the keypad to release the door. Sarah glanced at the bold sign hanging above the door. High Dependancy Unit. She felt a chill run down her spine. “Nick has been pretty lonely.” Camille informed her as the walked along a narrowed corridor. Sarah frowned, but did not question it as they arrived outside a door. She couldn’t help it but wonder what the nurse meant by that. Stephane was with Nicky right now. Was he not?

The nurse squirted some hand sanitiser from the pump on the wall outside the room and prompted for Sarah to do the same, which she did. She then opened the door and took a step inside. Sarah hovered back for a moment, scared of what state she was going to find her son. “Ah! Good evening Nicholas.” Camille beamed at the teenager who was propped up slightly in bed with cushions. He looked a lot more comfortable at ease with the nasal prongs delivering the much needed oxygen instead of the irritating mask. She tutted slightly when she noticed his barely touched dinner tray on the table. “You haven’t eaten very much.” She commented as she touched her fingers to his forehead. Fever was still up. “M’Not hungry.” Nick mumbled as he collapsed against the cushions. He was fed up of being so tired. All he’d done since arriving was sleep on and off. “I have a surprise.” Camille announced. “Someone here to see you.” She glanced back to the doorway. Sarah dropped her overnight case and rushed to the bedside. Nick’s eyes lit up immediately as he saw her as if all his Christmases and birthdays had come at once. “Mum!” He exclaimed. “Oh baby..” Sarah said as she enveloped him in a bone crushing hug before pulling back and thoroughly examining her son. “I got here as soon as I could, darling.” She assured him as she lay her hand on his forehead, frowning at the heat radiating off of him. He was like a furnace. “You’re burning up, baby.” She sighed. “We’re still trying to get his fever under control.” Camille replied as she secured a blood pressure cuff on Nick’s arm. Camille carried out a few more observations and administered another dose of antibiotic before leaving them to it.

“Im so sorry, darling.” Sarah said as she sat down next to the bed taking her sons hand in hers. “I had an inkling that this was more than just a cold. I shouldn’t have let you come.” She felt riddled with guilt. She should have acted on her mothers instinct and kept Nicky home. Yeah, he would have probably fallen out with her but this wouldn’t have happened. Nick glanced up at her. “It’s not your fault.” He assured her. “It’s mine.” He mumbled. His stubborn streak had caused this. “No, baby.” Sarah soothed. “I should have been stricter. You were sick and I still let you come.” She sighed. “I didn’t exactly make it easy for you.” Nick mumbled before being cut off as he fell in to a fit of harsh coughs. Sarah winced. His cough was ten times worse than it had been a few days ago. She could literally hear his chest rattling with each sharp intake. She rubbed his back as he struggled to get enough air in, but after a few minutes the coughing eased and Nick collapsed in to the pillows, exhausted. “Nicky?” Sarah asked, she could tell he was tired but she needed to know where Stéphane was. “Where’s your father?” Nick glanced up at her with sad, tired eyes. “He had to go to work..” He mumbled sleepily as his eyes began to droop shut. “You just sleep, darling. I’m here.” Sarah soothed as she brushed his hair away from his face. “I’m not going anywhere.” She promised. She felt anger bubble up inside of her. She was absolutely livid with Stéphane. His child was sick in hospital and he chose work over sitting by his poorly son’s bedside. It made her so angry. She was going to give him a piece of her mind for sure. How dare he do this to Nick? It had killed her every second that she had been separated from Nick and Stéphane had willingly made the choice not to be here. It angered her so much. She watched her sleeping son as tears welled up in her eyes, threatening to fall. Her ex husband wasn’t going to get away with this, not this time. She would be ready for him whenever he decided to come back with his tail between his legs.

Sarah was interrupted by a knock at the door. She looked up, recognising one of Nicks teachers peering into the room apologetically. “Mrs Nelson, I’m Youssef Farouk, Nicks science teacher. I just came by to keep him company once I found out his dad hadn’t been able to stay……” Sarah smiled at him warmly and stood up to hug him. Youssef stood stock still before eventually leaning into the hug awkwardly. “That’s so kind of you,” she said pulling out of the hug and gesturing to the teacher to sit down. “I’m livid that his dad didn’t stay with him today. Honestly….i could throttle that man.” She stroked Nicks cheek tenderly as he slept. His face felt a little less hot. Maybe the drugs were finally working? Youssef chose his words carefully, “yes I was surprised to hear that. I’m sorry that Nick was alone this afternoon. If we’d known one of us would have stayed with him.”
Sarah smiled, “I really must thank you for getting my Nicky into hospital and sorted out. He’s lucky to have such dedicated teachers looking out for him.” Youssef blushed slightly, not used to hearing praise from parents. They were usually scared of him.
“Not at all. I won’t stay now you are here, but please keep us informed on how he’s doing? We can bring his luggage home on the coach so don’t worry about organising collecting it. Has the doctor said when he’ll be well enough to travel?” Sarah shook her head. “Not yet, we need his temperature down first.”
Youssef gave her his number and left her with Nick, he was glad he hadn’t seen Stephane on his way in, he’d have struggled to remain civil.

Eventually Sarah had had to leave Nick and check into a hotel for the night. The nurses had promised to call her if there were any concerns but reassured her with the medication he was on he was likely to sleep through the night. Stephane hadn’t shown up and his phone was going straight to voicemail. Sarah had managed to sleep for a few restless hours before giving up and arriving at the hospital at 7am armed with a coffee and croissant from the nearby cafe. She hurried along to nicks room and was relieved to find him still sleeping peacefully. She quietly sat back down beside him and carefully felt his forehead. He felt much cooler than last night and the sheen of sweat on his face had gone. His breathing was still rattling but he seemed to have turned a corner in the night.

Nicks eyes fluttered open and he looked sleepily over at his mum. “Morning darling, how are you feeling?” She asked him, smiling at him as she sipped her coffee. He cleared his throat, “ok,” he said quietly, “when did you get here?”
“Oh not long ago sweetheart. The nurses said you slept well. The doctor will be in to check on you soon. Are you thirsty?” Nick nodded and Sarah used the controls to sit his bed up. She passed him his water and he sipped it greedily. He actually felt a bit better. It didn’t feel like he was breathing through a straw anymore. He was bone tired and his chest hurt, but after how he’d felt in the hotel he was so much better.

They sat together peacefully, Nick dozing while Sarah filled him in on her journey, how she’d brought the car to get him home. Suddenly the door swung open with a bang and Stephane appeared. “Ah! Sarah you made it.” He swept confidently into the room and over to her, ready to kiss her in greeting. His confidence dwindled as he took stock of the stony look on her face as she stood up to her full height and glared at him. “Nice of you to bother to join us,” she spat. Stephane paled. “But I came yesterday? I checked on the boy. Didn’t I Nicholas?” He looked to Nick to confirm his story. But Nick just sighed. “I guess.” He said quietly. “See?” Stephane looked triumphant. “I came and made sure he was ok.” He looked at Sarah, who was brimming with the fury only a mother could have. “You left him alone.” She hissed. “In a foreign hospital, in a high dependency unit. When he was struggling to breathe.” Nick hadn’t heard his mother sound so angry in years. Not since David was caught shoplifting energy drinks with his friends at the newsagents by their house. God she’d been mad at him, made him apologise and offer to work there for free as compensation. Nick smiled at the thought, then tuned back into her as she ranted at his dad. He knew what his dad had done was shitty, and it was nice to hear her go at it like that in his defence. He wished his dad was better at parenting. He didn’t think he was a bad person, he just was a crappy father. Sarah was getting louder, her face an angry shade of red. The noise drew the attention of nearby staff and a nurse popped her head round the door. “Everything ok in here?”
Sarah took a breath to calm herself down. She hadn’t been this angry with Stephane in years. She felt a lot better getting it all off her chest, though she felt a pang of guilt at the fact she’d caused a scene in Nicks hospital room.
“Yes,” she said carefully, “I’m sorry for the noise. “ the nurse nodded understandingly. “Just please remember this is a place for recovery. We need to keep the noise down.” Sarah apologised again, pinching the bridge of her nose. She sighed. Stephane stared at her, trying to decide if she had finished yelling at him.
“I am sorry I left him yesterday, I am here now though?”
Nick sighed, catching the attention of both his parents. “I am sorry Nicholas,” Stephane repeated. Nick didn’t have the energy to listen to his parents argue. “It’s fine,” he said quietly. “But I’m really tired now, I’m going to have a nap.” He rolled to the side and closed his eyes. “It was nice of you to come dad, I’ll see you soon.”
Sarah gave nicks hand a gentle squeeze, “you sleep baby, I’ll be here when you wake.”
Stephane hovered awkwardly, “just go,” Sarah hissed at him. “Let Nick rest. I’ll text you updates,” she left no room for argument so with a small sigh, Stephane left.
Nick cracked one eye open, “he’s gone?” He asked. Sarah nodded, “yes baby.” She stroked his fringe. “Good. I don’t need him here, just you.” Sarah smiled down at him. “I’m not going anywhere. Just rest.”

True to her word Sarah spent the whole day sitting with Nick. She sent Charlie regular updates, and because she felt obligated, she also sent them to Stephane who responded to each one with a thumbs up emoji. The doctors were pleased with nicks progress and by the afternoon he was off the oxygen and his temperature was almost back to normal. The doctor came by in the evening to do his rounds, checking his vitals and updating his chart. “I’m really happy with how this young man is doing. I’d like to keep him overnight just for monitoring but I reckon he can be discharged in the morning.” Sarah beamed at Nick who smiled softly back. “That’s wonderful news, thank you so much,” she shook the doctor’s hand. “One more night sweetheart and we will get you home,”

The following day, the doctor gave Nick the all clear to return home. Under strict instructions to rest and to make an appointment with his doctor at home to ensure his continued recovery. Nick was relieved and he sank into the passenger seat of his mums car with a contented sigh. “Home baby?” Sarah asked as she put the car in gear and began reversing out the car park space.

“Home,” he agreed.

Chapter Text

Nick blinked his eyes opened and smiled as he rolled his head to the side to be met with a head of dark curls. Charlie, fast asleep and curled in to his side, his head resting softly on Nick’s shoulder. This was a new development in their relationship. It had been three weeks since the summer fete, meaning it had been three weeks since Charlie had first stayed round the night at Nicks and they’d…you know. It had now become a regular thing. Last weekend Nick had spent the night at Charlie’s and now it’s was Charlie’s turn staying at the Nelson’s again. Nick grinned as he admired his sleeping boyfriend’s face. He’d never get over waking up next to the boy he loves.

Nick turned his attention to a scratching sound across the room at his door. Nellie. He rolled his eyes fondly at his beloved fluff-ball scratching at the door to get out. “Nell ssshhh…” he whispered. “Don’t wake char..” he very carefully peeled himself away from Charlie, throwing back the duvet and climbing out of the bed. He tiptoed over to Nellie, falling to his knees and giving her, her morning scratches. “Where’s my good Nellie girl, eh??” He whispered as he placed a soft kiss on her fur, before standing up and opening his bedroom door. Nellie eagerly bounded out of the room, off to find Sarah and get some more morning snuggles. Nick chuckled to himself as he turned around to see Charlie rubbing his eyes.

“Char. Im sorry if Nellie woke you..” He apologised as he trudged over to the bed and perched on the edge.

“She didn’t..” Charlie yawned as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. “You did…”

“What?” Nick replied, feeling a pang of guilt in his chest. He tried to be as quiet as he could so that he hadn’t woken Charlie up.

“You moved…” Charlie pouted as he pulled himself in to a semi sitting position, his head up against Nick’s headboard. “I was comfy.”

Nick chuckled. “Ah! So I’m your personal pillow now, am I??” He smirked.

“Yep!” Charlie replied matching his boyfriend’s smirk.

Nick dived back onto the bed and wrapped himself around Charlie who sighed contentedly and snuggled into his chest. “That’s better,” he mumbled sleepily, closing his eyes. They dozed together until they were interrupted by a loud rumbling sound. “Sorry,” Nick whispered, his cheeks reddening. “Hungry babe?” Charlie laughed.
“Yeah,” Nick replied sheepishly.
“Well, I wouldn’t mind a toastie?” Charlie opened one eye and looked pleadingly at Nick who chuckled. Last week at Charlie’s house they had made toasties for breakfast and had both agreed it was the king of breakfast choices on a weekend.
“Oh would you now,” he sat up and stretched, “I think we have a toastie maker in the cupboard. We haven’t used it in years, but I know David went through a phase of eating them non stop. I tell you what….as I am the best boyfriend in the whole world, I’ll go down and make us a couple of toasties and bring them up.”
Charlie smiled, “and coffee?” Nick snorted, “alright princess you just lay there and look pretty while I go and do all the work.”
“Sounds good,” Charlie said sleepily as he pulled the covers up to his chin and sighed happily. “So cosy.” He murmured.
Nick watched him for a moment from the door. It wasn’t lost on him how far Charlie had come with his eating that he was suggesting food so easily and without any worry. He was ridiculously proud of him. “Stop staring at me and go make me breakfast,” Charlie mumbled from his cocoon. Nick chuckled, “I’m going I m going,” he closed the door behind him and went downstairs.

Sarah was in the living room, coffee in hand watching Sunday brunch on the tv. “Morning darling,” she smiled as Nick walked over and gave her a hug, “you two sleep well?” Nick nodded, “yeah, I’m just going to get us some breakfast. You want anything?” Sarah shook her head, “I had mine ages ago sweetheart but thanks for asking. I’ll have another coffee though if you’re offering?” She downed the last bit and handed her mug over. Nick took it with a chuckle, “you and Charlie are both coffee addicts. Am I ok to give him one of your nespresso pods?”
“Of course, there’s some more in the cupboard.” Nick grinned and took her cup through to the kitchen. He made his mum a cup of coffee and then began rooting around in the cupboard and fridge for everything he needed. He opened and closed most of the cupboards before finally spotting the old toastie maker at the back of the corner one. He pulled it out, carefully avoiding knocking over the thousands of Tupperwares that seemed to be multiplying in the cupboard. How could they possibly need this many tupperwares?
He opened up the toastie maker and placed the bread inside. He then grated some cheese and added that along with some ham. Annoyingly the toastie maker only made one at a time so he plugged it in and set the first one off while he took the coffee through to Sarah.
As he returned to the kitchen he noticed a faint waft of smoke coming from the toastie maker so he quickly switched it off, worried he was going to burn it. He carefully picked up the sandwich and placed it on the plate, then began to make the second one.
The last thing he remembered was switching the toastie maker back on, a shooting pain running through his whole body…then everything went black.

Sarah was sipping her coffee, watching her program and listening to Nick bustling around in the kitchen. She could imagine him and Charlie in the future, in their own flat maybe, the domestic bliss of living together. Maybe they’d have a dog like Nellie. Nick had always been at home in the kitchen and she loved the idea that he would be making breakfast for Charlie in the future. They were so well suited to each other. Not like her and Stephane. Alarm bells had been ringing for her from day one, but she was young and foolish and so sure that it had to be love. Marriage and babies had come along far too quickly and before she knew it she was home alone with two small boys while her husband was off doing good knows what with god knows who.

Her thoughts were stopped by a loud bang. The tv immediately switched off. “Nick?” She called, “have we had a power cut?” She listened but no sound came from the kitchen. Nellie shot off the sofa and into the kitchen, barking frantically. A sense of unease ran through her body. She put her coffee down and headed to the kitchen. She was immediately met with a smell of burning. And then her whole world stopped as she looked down to see Nick flat on his back on the kitchen floor. His eyes were closed, Nellie was licking his face to try to wake him. He was eerily still and quiet. “Nicky?” She rushed towards him and crouched beside him. His right hand was burnt. It was red and angry and blistering. “Nicky?” She said a little louder.
Nothing.
Her eyes were drawn to the smouldering toastie maker on the side. She didn’t even realise they still owned that. It had been a wedding present, so it must be at least 20 years old. She’s meant to throw it out when David left for uni.
The smoke alarm started, loud and piercing. Still Nick didn’t move. With a growing sense of dread Sarah kneeled next to Nick and put her ear to his mouth and nose to listen for any sign of breathing. Nothing. Shakily she put her fingers to the pulse point on his neck. “Nicky,” her voice cracked as she shouted his name. She shook his shoulders to try and rouse him. “Oh my god, Nicky, please wake up.” She put her hands on his chest and began chest compressions. Tears streaming down her face. She needed to phone 999. Her phone was in the living room. She couldn’t leave him. “Charlie,” she screamed, “Charlie come quickly.”

Charlie was so cosy and warm swaddled in Nicks duvet. He loved that he had a double bed. It meant the duvet was lovely and big and snuggly. He slept so well at Nicks. He also loved how chill Sarah was about him staying over. His parents were trying, but it was so much more awkward at his house. It felt like a walk of shame in the morning. But here Sarah was just her usual cheerful self. His relaxing lie in was interrupted by the sound of the smoke alarm. He snorted out a laugh. Nick had obviously managed to burn the toasties. And then he heard Sarah. Screaming his name. His blood turned cold and he was out of bed and racing down the stairs before his brain could process what was happening. The tone of her voice was terrifying.
He burst into the kitchen and tried to process what he could see in front of him. Sarah, on her knees next to Nick, giving him chest compressions. The smoke alarm was still going, the toastie maker still smouldering on the side.
“Oh my god, Charlie. Thank god you are here. We need to call 999.”
“What happened??” Charlie’s eyes were fixed on Nick who was obviously not breathing. “I think he’s electrocuted himself.” She managed to huff out. Her arms already tiring from the compressions. “Do you know cpr?” Charlie nodded. He had taken a first aid course as part of his Duke of Edinburgh award that his mum had insisted he do last year. He knelt down next to Nick, who was far too pale and still motionless. He took over from Sarah who stood and raced to the lounge to grab her phone, dialling 999.
Charlie stopped compressions and tilted nicks head back to open up his airway. He gave him two breaths, then continued compressions while Sarah spoke to the lady on the phone.
“Ambulance is 2 minutes away,” she said as she carefully used a wooden spoon to switch off the toastie maker. She flung open the window to try to rid the air of the toxic smoke. Charlie continued compressions, adrenaline coursing through his veins. He couldn’t get his head round what was going on. His whole being was consumed with giving compressions.
A loud wailing of sirens pierced the air and Sarah raced to the door to let the paramedics in. Charlie moved out of the way, shock beginning to set in as the paramedics got to work. They immediately pulled out a portable defibrillator and the first paramedic made quick work of cutting nicks t shirt off before attaching the pads. The machine came to life, giving out instructions as Sarah and Charlie watched helplessly. The first shock went through nicks body, before the machine began its cycle again. Finally after the third shock the machine detected a heartbeat.
“He’s back with us,” the paramedic said with a smile as nicks chest began rising and falling on its own.
“Oh my god,” Sarah sobbed, reaching for Charlie’s hand, who took it and squeezed it. He couldn’t believe what had just happened. Nicks heart had stopped beating. It was going again now but he was still not awake. Charlie watched on through tears as the paramedics wrapped a special gauze around his burnt arm. They placed an oxygen mask over his face and nose and began to manoeuvre him onto a stretcher. Nicks eyes fluttered open and he let out a loud moan.

Nick slowly became aware of noises around him. A horrible smell in the air. And a crushing pain in his chest. As he tried to remember where he was and what had happened he realised his arm was in agony. A searing pain from the tips of his fingers reaching all the way up past his elbow. He could hear voices that he didn’t recognise. Then he heard his mum…..and Charlie. As he was jostled he managed to open his eyes and he groaned at the pain. “Nicky? Baby?” He heard the panic in his mums voice and he turned to try to look at her. She looked terrible. Her eyes were puffy, her cheeks red, with tear tracks running down them. “Mum….”he managed to whisper out. “It hurts,” she reached over and held his good hand. “You’ll be ok baby. They are going to look after you.” He glanced over to Charlie who was white with worry. “Char….” He rasped out. “Shh, don’t try to talk ok,” Charlie leaned over and stroked his hair. “Just rest.” Nick nodded, totally exhausted and allowed his eyes to close.
“We’ve given him some strong pain relief for the burn which will make him drowsy. We need to get him to hospital.” They started to wheel the trolley out onto the driveway and into the ambulance. “Charlie I need to go with him. Will you be ok? I’ll phone you as soon as I know anything.”
Charlie nodded. He wasn’t sure he was ok but he knew that Sarah needed to go with Nick. “I’ll phone my mum and get her to bring me to the hospital if that’s ok? I can sort out Nellie first?” Sarah gave him a hug, “of course darling. Thank you.” She followed Nick into the back of the ambulance and Charlie watched as it pulled out of river crescent. He slumped down onto the front step. What the hell had just happened? Had he really just performed cpr on his boyfriend? Nellie came and sat next to him resting her head on his knee. “It’s ok girl,” he whispered. “He’s gonna be ok.”
Charlie stroked her head, allowing his heart rate to slow to a more normal level before he got up and went back inside.
The smoke in the kitchen had cleared. He threw out the now cold toastie and cleaned up, his mind on auto pilot. He let Nellie out into the garden, then sat at the kitchen table and allowed himself to cry.

Sarah gripped on to her son’s un- injured hand as they rode in the back of the ambulance. The earlier sight would haunt her forever. The image of her baby laying on his back motionless, unconscious and un breathing. Nick had been electrocuted. Her son had literally stopped breathing. He’d died. The paramedic had said as much. Nick had stopped breathing for around 3 minutes. Sarah felt her body trembling. She was still in shock. What if she hadn’t been home? Nick would have died. She shuddered at the thought, but it was true. Charlie had been upstairs. Had she not been in the house when it had happened and the TV had gone off. Oh god, she hated to think about what could have been the outcome. Thank god she was. Thank god that the emergency services had acted so quickly and thank god Charlie had been there so she could call the ambulance car whilst he administered CPR on her son. Oh Charlie. He must be beside himself, but only she was allowed to accompany Nicky in the ambulance. She’d need to call him and check in when she arrived at the hospital and make sure he was okay. She was pulled out of her train of thoughts by a soft moan. She looked down to see Nick’s eyes flickering open. He had been drifting in and out of consciousness since they got in to the ambulance.

“It’s okay, sweetheart.” Sarah soothed as she rubbed her thumb across the back of his hand before giving it a gentle squeeze. “Mum’s here..”

Nicks eyes fluttered opened and closed. He didn’t really know what was going on. All he was aware of was pain. His chest ached. He had a dull piercing pain running up his arm to his fingers from his elbow and his hand and fingertips were stinging. “Mum…” he mumbled. His voice restricted by the plastic oxygen mask covering his mouth and nose. “I’m here baby..” Sarah assured him. He sounded terrified. No wonder. “Hurts..” Nick whimpered. “Can’t you give him anything stronger?” Sarah asked the paramedic who was monitoring Nick’s obs. The paramedic gave her an apologetic look. “He’s exceeded the dosage of morphine we are allowed to administered before he’s properly examined at triage.” Sarah sighed. Seeing her baby writhing around in so much pain was pulling at her heartstrings. “Will he be okay?” She asked. She needed to know what they were dealing with. Her son had been electrocuted in his own home, whilst innocently making some breakfast. She felt so guilty. She had meant to throw that darn toastie maker out years ago. If she had, this would never of happened. The paramedic, a female turned to face her. “He’s a lucky kid.” She said. “Things could have been so much worse.” Sarah let out a shaky breath. She felt like she had been holding it for so long. The air in her lungs suspended. That sentence alone filled her with the tiniest bit of reassurance that Nick was going to be okay. “I think there’s a definite fracture to the left elbow, some possible bruising of the ribs from the CPR compressions. We won’t know the extent of the burns to his fingers until he’s assessed properly but he seems to luckily escaped any head injury or concussion.” Katie, the paramedic smiled as she placed a soft hand on Nick’s shoulder. “You’re a tough lad.” “Yeah, he is…” Sarah gave her a wobbly smile as she placed a kiss on Nick’s hand.

The ambulance came to a halt as they whizzed up to the entrance of A&E. A medical team already there to greet them as the backdoor of the van swung open. Sarah kept as close as she possible could as Nick was wheeled into an assessment bay. She listened as Katie gave the handover and watched on as the doctors and nurses already started fussing around Nick. They shone lights in his eyes, much to his annoyance. Checked his heart rate and blood pressure and throughly cleaned the burns to his hand and fingers. Sarah flicked as Nick writhed in pain. Second-degree burns. No wonder he was in so much pain. The area was cleaned properly, swabbed to make sure there was no infected skin before being wrapped up tightly in a medical gauze. The nurse then administered some oxycodone and more morphine through an iv cannula that had been inserted in to Nick’s right hand.

“He needs to be taken to X-ray so we can determine the extent of damage to his ribs and elbow.” One of the doctors in charge informed Sarah. “Nurse Rachel will fetch you a nice cup of tea. You’ve had quite the fright and are probably in a state of shock.” Sarah looked at him wide eyed. The very thought of being separated from Nick when he was evidently in a lot of pain made her feel sick, but he was a doctor. He knew what he was doing. “Can‘t I stay with him?” She asked hopefully. “He’s rather upset.” She glanced at the dried in tear stains on her son’s face as he fought the sleep. The drugs pumping through his veins making him sleepy. “He’s in good hands. I promise you.” The doctor smiled. Sarah nodded. This would give her an opportunity to call Charlie. The poor boy must be beside himself. She nodded before bending down and placing a gentle kiss on Nick’s forehead. “I’ll be back with you real soon baby.” She assured him before following the nurse out of the room.

Sarah sat down in the uncomfortable plastic chair in the little waiting area just outside the radiology department of the hospital. The sweet, lukewarm tea from the hospital vending machine was doing absolutely nothing to calm her nerves as she waited on an update. She still couldn’t believe that this had happened this morning. She had been seconds away from losing her son. It was such a scary thought. This is things you read about in take a break magazines or watch on the news. You never think something like this could happen. Nicky almost died, all because of a faulty kitchen appliance. Sarah sat the paper cup on the table and reached in to her handbag, retrieving her phone. She needed to call Charlie.

She wasn’t surprised in the slightest when he picked up on the first ring. “Sarah? Is he okay?” He said quickly. “Please tell me he’s okay.”

Sarah felt a tear prick at the corner of her eye. She could hear the emotion thick in Charlie’s voice. “He’s okay…” she assured him quickly. “He’s in X-ray, He hurt his elbow when he fell down…they think he may have a fracture.” “Oh my god..” Charlie said. “He’s awake though? He’s breathing?” He rattled off question after question. “He’s conscious, darling…” she said softly. “He’s in a lot of pain, but they’re giving him medicine.” “I’m so sorry, Sarah..” Charlie said, his voice breaking as he let out a little sob. Sarah felt her body go numb. Charlie wasn’t blaming himself was he? “Whatever for, sweetheart.” She soothed. “It’s all my fault.” Charlie cried. “Nick was only making cheese toasties because I told him that I was in the mood for one.” “No darling. It’s not your fault.” She said firmly. “It was an accident, a horrible. Terrible accident, but it’s not your fault..” Charlie sniffed on the other side. “You’re just saying that. It is my fault. I should have just had cereal like a normal person if it wasn’t for me, Nick wouldn’t be in hospital…” Sarah shook her head. She was not going to sit here and listen to that sweet boy blame himself. It had been an accident. It shouldn’t have happened but it did. It was nobody’s fault. She could say it was hers. She had failed to get rid of the toastie machine but it was just an accident. “Now you listen to me.” She said firmly. “If anyone is to blame. Then it’s me. I should have gotten rid of that toastie maker. I’ve had it since well before Nick was born. What happened was horrible. But it wasn’t your fault, okay? I know for a fact that Nick wouldn’t want you blaming yourself…” “But I asked-“ “Charlie I want to hear you say it.” Sarah ordered with an authoritative tone in her voice. “It wasn’t my fault.” Charlie said quetly. “Louder.” Sarah replied. “It wasn’t my fault.” Charlie repeated, but a bit louder this time. “Good!” Sarah told him. “Where are you now, love?” “I…um…I’m still at yours. I think Nellie can tell that something is wrong. She just keeps sitting at the front door and whimpering. I…I hope you don’t mind. I just didn’t want to leave her alone.”

“Oh darling, of course I don’t..” Sarah teplied, her heart warming. Charlie was such a pleasant, kind hearted boy. She was so happy that Nick had found himself a decent, loyal partner. “Would you stay with her until I know what’s happening. I don’t even know if they’re going to admit Nicky or not. I guess it just depends on the outcome of the X-ray.” “Yeah I will stay.” Charlie replied. “Will you let me know when you hear anything?” He asked eagerly. “Of course, sweetheart.” Sarah said before ending the call. She felt better knowing that Charlie was there to keep an eye on Nellie. Her sweet girl had seen everything earlier on. She must be so shaken up. She had to basically pry her away from Nick’s side when the paramedics were working on him. Sarah glanced up as she heard the door opening and the doctor that had been earlier treating her son, stepped inside. She stood up immediately. “How is he?” She asked. The doctor sat down and urged her to do the same. “Nicholas has sustained quite the fracture to his left elbow.” He explained. “Luckily it is a clean break and won’t require surgery, however he will need to be in plaster for 6-8 weeks whilst the bone heals itself. He’s got some brushing around his rib cage. He will be quite sore for a few days but he is a very lucky young man. He’s avoided any serious brain injury considering he was oxygen starved for so long. The burns to his hand and finger tips are superficial-partial thickness burns, even thought there has been slight damage to the epidermis and dermis which has caused some blistering. I am fairly confident that the skin will heal on its own, but the the area will needed to be cleaned throughly and the dressings changed daily. I am also confident that there will be minimal to zero scarring as the burns aren’t too deep.” “Thank you.” Sarah said. It was a lot to take it. Nicky wasnt going to recover over night, but he was out of the woods which was all that mattered. “Does he have to stay in hospital overnight or can I take him home?” She asked eagerly. She knew Nick wouldn’t want to stay in hospital and she didn’t want to have to leave him. “That’s not necessary.” The doctor smiled. “Nick is just having his arm plastered as we speak. We just need you to fill out a few forms and then you can take your boy home.” Sarah let out a sigh of relief and smiled. Nicky was coming home. She thought about messaging Charlie and then thought against it. It would be a nice surprise for him.

Nick watched as the nurse expertly and efficiently plastered his arm. He’d chosen a blue wrap to go over the top of it. He sighed. He felt so stupid. What had he been thinking using the toastie machine. He remembered his mum telling him she was going to throw it out because it was basically an antique. And now his arm was in a cast for the next couple of months, his head hurt and his chest felt like he’d been kicked by an elephant.
“There, all done love. That should feel a bit better eh?” She patted his shoulder kindly. “Thank you,” he said softly. “Your mum is just finishing up the paperwork and collecting your painkillers, then you can go home. You’ll have follow up appointments for the burns to change the dressing and keep an eye. But you are free to go young man. No more electrocuting yourself ok?” She grinned at him and he smiled sheepishly back. “Not planning on it,” he agreed.
Nick swung his legs carefully off the bed and stood up. His legs felt a bit shaky and the room spun a bit. “Take it easy,” the nurse said. “You’ve had one hell of a shock…..literally!” Nick nodded and sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for the room to stop spinning. Sarah poked her head in, “you ready to go sweetheart?” She took in his pale face and slightly sweaty skin. “You ok darling?” She was over in a flash hovering beside him anxiously. “I’m ok,” Nick replied, “just a bit dizzy. It’s passing.”
He stood up gingerly and held onto his mums arm as they slowly made their way out of the hospital to a waiting taxi. “Let’s get you home darling.”
Nick sank back into the back seat of the car, Sarah clipped the seatbelt around his poorly arm and kissed his forehead. He closed his eyes and dozed for the short journey back home. He was exhausted.

The next thing he knew they were pulling up to the house and Sarah was paying the fare. He rubbed his good hand over his face to try to wake himself up. Everything was throbbing or sore. He wanted to get into bed and cuddle Charlie. He must have been so frightened seeing what happened. It was probably a lot more frightening for him than Nick as he had been unconscious for most of it. “Mum, can you phone Charlie and let him know I’m ok?” He asked as they made their way slowly to the house. His phone was somewhere inside. And he really didn’t have the brain to use his phone right now.
Sarah smiled, “I can do you one better,” she grinned as the front door swung open and Charlie flew out of the door and up to them, Nellie close behind her barking madly.
“Oh my god Nick!” Charlie screeched to a halt in front of him, suddenly unsure if he could hug him. His arm was strapped to his chest and covered in a navy blue cast. His forehead was creased in pain but he immediately held out his other arm and hugged Charlie tight. “I’m so glad you are ok,” Charlie breathed out, “that was the worst thing I’ve ever seen in my life.” Nick kissed the top of his curls, “I’m so sorry,”. Nick whispered, “it was all my fault.”
Sarah chuckled. “That’s a hatrick now, all 3 of us have taken the blame. Boys it was an accident. Now let’s get Nick inside before he keels over.”
Charlie led Nick inside and onto the sofa where he was joined by a very excited Nellie who licked his face and looked like she was about to vibrate off the sofa with happiness. “Easy girl,” Nick chuckled, “I’m sorry I scared you too.”
Sarah fussed over Nick for a few minutes getting him comfy with blankets and pillows, ensuring his poorly arm was supported. Charlie tucked himself in next to him and sighed with relief. “Don’t ever scare me like that again. Ok? I love you too much.” Nick laughed, then winced as his ribs protested. “I will try not to.”
Sarah came back with cups of tea and her phone in her hand. “You must be starving boys, order whatever you like,” she chucked the phone over to Charlie who started scrolling through the delivery apps. “What do you fancy babe?”
“Anything but a toastie!” Nick chuckled. Sarah laughed out loud. “I totally agree!”

Chapter Text

I hope you all enjoy One Punch.  We are very excited about this one.  Poor Nick didn't get much of a break from us lmao.