Chapter Text
Lance is self-conscious of his hands.
Don’t get him wrong, he’s not a nail-biter by any means. Well, at least not anymore. When he was young, he figured out early on that if his nails were getting too long for his liking or looked the slightest bit uneven, it’d give him the perfect excuse to bite them down to a nub. Now he keeps a nail filer on hand or somewhere within arm’s reach to keep them perfectly trimmed. There are times when he gets nervous and needs some kind of distraction— just needs to fixate on something, anything other than what’s currently happening in his head— but he’s found other methods since then so it’s pretty rare.
So no, that isn’t the reason he hides his hands to himself. And no, he doesn’t have sweaty palms either. Quite the opposite really, he never seems to get his hands to warm up. It’s the reason he loves going to cafes to try out the latest tea and coffee items on the menu. Add a book into the mix, Lance will pick out a little corner like it was made for him and him alone, spending hours sitting inside, hands wrapped around his beverage and staying toasty warm with not an ounce of sweat forming in his palms.
Not a hypochondriac either. Growing up in a huge family, Lance knows what it’s like to wrestle in the mud, sweaty and in desperate need of a shower. And then there’s his niece and nephew who love pouring all their creative energy into their arts and crafts. Give them a couple of hours, and Lance will come out with paint and glue dried between his fingers, marks smeared across his skin that take’ll days to fully remove.
The reason isn’t important, at least that’s what Lance tells himself. And if he takes his time trying to figure out how to get past it, then that’s between him and God. He swears he’s gonna get it together someday and work on it. The only question would be when?
__
As it turns out, it happens during a mission. Granted, it was supposed to be a simple reconnaissance mission on planet Fovlorif, but a mission nevertheless. Coran boasted about how simple and laid back the Fovlorians were so the team decided only three paladins would need to go: Lance, Keith, and Pidge.
Arriving on the planet, there had been no warning signs about the foes they were about to face. Coran didn’t take into account how after the Galra empire conquered more than half the planets in the galaxy for a millennia, the Fovlorians evolved and developed new aggressive behaviors in order to defend their territory to keep trespassers at bay.
The team decided not to act right away. If there was a way to avoid fighting of any kind, they’d take that route in a heartbeat. Pidge, bless their soul, took a step forward in order to begin negotiations, but as soon as they uttered their first sentence, a gruff looking Fovlorian charged forward with a raised arm and with absolutely no mercy, swung at Pidge with a cold steel look in his eyes.
Lance felt his body move before he could even register what was happening. Thank god for the training Shiro encouraged the paladins to take for weeks on end because Lance instinctively pulled out his holographic shield, letting his body move on autopilot. But as soon as the Fovlorian’s arm made contact with his shield, the impact was so strong he wobbled under the force, twisting his wrist by too much to compensate against the strength of the blow.
Enter their current dilemma: trying to stay alive.
“Get to the lion!” Pidge yells, immediately wasting no time and heading towards Green as fast as they could.
“Pidge, wait—” is all Keith can manage to say before a fissure forms right under everyone’s feet, causing him to stumble backwards.
Lance stretches out, his wrist whining from the effort it takes to pull Keith back further so he doesn’t fall in. The Fovlorians are distracted by Pidge’s escape, eyes scanning the horizon ahead to see if there would be any way to cut off their escape route further beyond. With the chasm blocking off their exit, Keith grabs Lance’s arm and yanks him off to the right towards an area that has dense foliage and coverage.
“We gotta find higher ground!” Keith yells towards Lance, already pulling up his communication device so he can contact Pidge to send coordinates.
“There is no higher ground, genius!” Lance yells back. “Nothing but flat plains my guy!”
Lance knew he shouldn’t act so snarky, that they should be working as a team, but given the situation, he knew Keith would give him a pass.
“Fine asshole! You come up with a plan!”
Scratch that — Keith would not be giving him a pass.
“Let’s just hide till Pidge finds us!” Lance chances a glance behind him and sees the Fovlorians sprinting, using their massive arms to propel themselves forward, much in the same way a gorilla would. Thank god they decided to move when they did, the headstart giving them a few meters advantage to reach the outskirts of a forest surrounded by thickets that lead into a large group of trees.
Lance swings a hard left and spots a cave, mostly covered by vines and moss that make for the perfect place to recollect themselves and come up with a new game plan. He shouts to Keith, but finds him right by his side, his reflexes on high alert.
They both jump in at the same time. With his body lurching forward, Lance feels his stomach drop before he sees the cave descending downwards and both he and Keith come to the realization that they really should’ve taken the saying “look before you leap” a lot more seriously. With nowhere to go but down, their bodies fall, rolling through mud and rocks, bumping and groaning, making their way further into the cave before finally reaching the bottom and landing with a final “omfp”.
Okay, so not the way Lance imagined his day going when he woke up this morning.
His whole body aches, and feels as though he’s been hit by a bus. Not that he would know what that feels like firsthand, but he’s pretty sure the scrapes littered along his body is something you would only get from a vehicle crashing into you. He has half a mind to just lay there on the ground and accept his fate, but his past experiences on various planets force him to go through the motions to make sure nothing’s broken. He sits up slowly, careful in his movement in case he’s broken a rib, but the ache he feels coming on tells him that he’s only suffered a couple of bruises that will no doubt hurt a lot more in the hours to follow.
His eyes drift downward to scan his body, but he can’t see a thing. The cave is so deep that no light reaches down to where they are. Nevertheless, Lance decides to give his body a quick pat down and sighs in relief when everything feels fine and right where it’s supposed to be.
“God, I’m getting some major deja vu here. You good, Keith?”
Lance hears a groan next to him and he panics for a second. His eyes start to adjust a little, but he still can’t see much. He pats around on his arm until he finds the proper button to flick on the emergency flashlight equipped in his suit. His eyes immediately squint at the harsh light, but he feels an immense relief at finally being able to see what’s around him.
“Why is it every time I’m with you I’m always falling down somewhere?” Keith grunts while lying on his back. His body suit is covered in dirt and grime, no doubt from all the tumbling they endured a few minutes ago.
Lance chuckles, recalling the day they first became defenders of the universe. Only a couple hours after they rescued Shiro they found themselves sliding down a stream inside a cave not too different from the one they were inside of now, landing before the Blue Lion. There was also that day they were killing time when the castle broke down and he and Keith were barrelling down a chute only to find themselves falling into the upside-down swimming pool.
“Cause I always know how to have a good time,” Lance jokes.
Lance feels more than sees Keith do an eye roll before he too gets up to assess the situation. There’s a deep silence that follows their exchange.
“No sign of the enemy. Let’s hope we stay lucky until the team finds us.”
Keith stands, immediately opening the control panel from his suit. Lance can’t see too clearly from the angle he’s sitting at, but the sound of static tells him that he isn’t getting too good of a signal to contact the others.
“Yeah,” Lance replies, beginning to lift himself up but winces as he applies pressure to his wrist to stand. He opts to use his other hand and mentally sighs in relief when he feels no pain. As he takes in their surroundings, he cradles his wrist into his hand and can’t help but frown.
Great, just had to go and be the hero again. He unbuckles the pouch secured around his waist, unzips it, and rummages around inside, checking for the bandage he packed last minute before taking off in the Green Lion.
Keith sighs in frustration next to him, tapping a few buttons on his screen before he closes his communication panel. He takes a look at Lance attempting to swathe his wrist on his own but failing miserably.
“Sprained wrist?”
“Yup,” Lance replies sarcastically, popping the “p” for emphasis. “Not sure if we can leave any time soon. Don’t think I’ll be of any use if those guys start attacking us.”
He pulls out his bayard, transforming it into his go-to blaster, but winces as he attempts to hold it in his hand. The gun isn’t heavy by any means, but if he wants to hold it steady, he has to let the weight settle in his palm. His wrist however cries in protest at the motion, indicating it’s too much to handle at the moment.
“Don’t,” Keith warns, immediately making Lance lower his weapon so the weight doesn’t give him any issues. Keith takes his hand away and then shifts it so that his palm is outstretched towards Lance. He realizes his gloves are ripped up, a few of his fingers now exposed with small holes in the palm area. Lance looks down at his own hands and realizes his are pretty much in the same condition. He looks back again at Keith’s hand, wondering why he still has it held up in the air before Lance figures out that he wants him to pass the bandage.
“It’s fine man, I got it,” Lance says as he attempts to tie off the covering, only for the wrap to loosen and fall off to the ground.
“I uhh,” Lance starts, bending down to pick up the bandage once more. “I meant to do that.”
Keith stares back with a deadpan expression.
“By the time you finish, the enemy will have found us already. Just hand it over and then we can figure out our next move.”
Lance chuckles awkwardly, unconsciously taking a step back to create more distance. He has to come up with a believable excuse.
“Seriously, I got it,” he tries nonchalantly. “I was trying to rush it, but this isn’t the first time I’ve sprained my wrist y’know!” He huffs and grumbles to himself, making a big show of wrapping his hand with rapt attention.
Maybe that’ll get him to back off. He looks over and sees Keith already coming up with a retort so he adds on, “But thanks for trying to help.”
There. Problem solved.
Keith still looks like he wants to say something, eyes looking downward at Lance’s hand, but as a few moments pass, he decides to drop it. He sneaks a glance again, gazing at the way he cups his fingers with the bandage messily caught in between. The stare has Lance shift off to his side to hide his hands away, keeping it out of Keith’s sight so he doesn’t probe any further.
“Suit yourself,” Keith grunts before he walks away. He makes his way back over to the tunnel they came from, inspecting its opening. The flashlight can only illuminate so far, but the steep incline makes Lance groan.
“Alright, so going back is definitely not an option.” Lance multitasks, wrapping up his wrist as he walks in the opposite direction and inspects if there is another path to take.
The cavern is spacious and seems to go on further ahead for them to walk. Lance ties off his dressing before lifting up his flashlight to judge how much he can see up ahead.
It’s not his best wrap job, he’ll admit. The bandage looks bulky and really doesn’t offer the support he needs to actually recover from his sprain, but he figures for now it’ll do just fine.
“Seems we’ve lucked out. We can go on ahead and hopefully find another exit.”
Lance immediately begins walking, eager to get the hell out. He’s so over this mission. Once he gets back, he’s gonna book it to the infirmary and get his wrist all healed before heading to his room to take a well deserved hour long bath. A good facemask as he soaks in some warm water seems like the perfect way to unwind from this stressful trip.
“Wait!” Keith calls. Lance really wants to ignore him, but against his better judgment stops to look back at Keith.
“I know we don’t have a lot of options now, but we still need to think things through, Lance.”
Keith’s expression is stony. Any other time, Lance would’ve barked back at him with sarcasm, but seeing his arms folded in on himself, Lance can see that Keith is trying his best to be level-headed.
Lance turns around, lifting his arms causing his hip to jut out a little before he says, “What else is there to think about? Comms are down and we need to get back. The only thing that makes sense is to keep going.”
Keith lets out a sigh, clearly frustrated. A hand comes up to his head trying to run his fingers through his bangs, a habit Lance has noticed since they started this new adventure together, but when the hand comes into contact with his headgear, he uselessly swipes against the metal. It’s awkward and probably isn’t the comfort Keith was hoping for.
He takes a deep breath before he continues, “I’m not disagreeing with you, but you’re hurt. We don’t know if there’s anything down in this cave with us and if we run into some more enemies we have to make sure we can defend ourselves without taking on more damage.”
That gets Lance’s attention. The possibility of facing more danger makes him nervous, very nervous. It would be no problem if they were both fine, but like Keith said, he’s hurt. Not too badly thankfully, but enough to hold them back from fighting at their full potential.
He thinks back to the Fovlorians and their aggressive tactics. Encountering them again could very much mean losing his life. Or if they were feeling gracious enough to hold him captive, that’d just put the team at a disadvantage. They’d have to waste time and resources to come up with a way to get him back.
Useless. Thoughtless. A pain to deal with. That’s what they see you as already, don’t give them any more reason to think they don’t need you.
He ruffles his hair with his good hand, letting out a long sigh.
“Ok, you’re right. We’ll take it slow. Let’s keep an ear out for any loud noises. If we do run into some enemies you can take the front and I’ll offer support from behind.” Lance offers with a tight smile.
Keith takes a few seconds to think it over. It’s a good compromise Lance thinks. The plan makes him think of how far he and Keith have come in their journey together. Sure, they still like to bicker and jab at one another, but they recognize how important it is to stay together as a team.
“We have to consider what’ll happen if there’s no exit. I have some food pouches for emergencies, but it’ll only last us a day.” Keith crosses his arms and looks down, his brows turning downwards as he continues deep in thought.
“I think I have the same.” Lance pulls up the inventory list from his control panel and sure enough, he has four packs with him. “That bumps us up to two days.”
The numbers make him feel slightly more hopeful, but at the same time, he second guesses his original plan. What if there is no exit like Keith said? And if they walk with no end in sight they’ll surely die of starvation or dehydration before anyone knows where to find them.
Lance takes a look again at the gap they fell down from. The incline is steep, but maybe they can reach the top using their jetpacks.
“I was thinking the same,” Keith says, interrupting Lance’s train of thought. “We can try it, but my guess is we won’t make it. We were rolling down and tumbling for a while. The pack might run out of fuel before we even make it to the top.”
Lance chews nervously on his lip. The idea is a longshot, but he wants to remain hopeful.
“Maybe we should still try it? If we make it, it’ll save us a hell lot of time.”
Keith nods and bends his knees a little before jumping up. The pack has him make it a few feet off the ground before it sputters and fizzes out. Keith lands on the ground again, checking behind him and seeing a bit of smoke come out from his jetpack. It must’ve gotten damaged when they fell down into this cavern.
“Perfect,” Keith grunts, beginning to pull up some analytics from his control panel to assess the damage.
Lance starts to shift into a crouch so that he can try the same but feels pressure on his arm. He looks down to find Keith pulling him back.
“Uhh, what’s up?” Lance questions, looking around to see if there’s something he missed.
“Even if your pack works, it’s best we don’t split up. You’re hurt, remember?”
Lance is about ready to roll his eyes, but Keith continues, “I’m not saying you can’t take care of yourself, but you’d be going straight into enemy territory if you head back in this direction.”
Lance looks at him with bewilderment. He always knew Keith was smart, but it’s so hard to remember when the guy is always coming at him for the tiniest things. And although it hurts his pride to admit it, he knows Keith is 100% right.
“Yeah, ok fine. Guess we’re just going to have to go with plan A after all.”
Keith doesn’t respond immediately. He pauses for a moment to look at Lance before his eyes drop down again to his wrapped up hand. Lance feels himself flinch and is just about ready to say something before Keith beats him to the punch.
“Alright,” Keith settles. His expression is unreadable, but before Lance can ask him more about it, he quickly spins on his heel and starts heading deeper into the cave, shoulders rigid, but head held high and unwavering,
The first few minutes of walking are tense, to say the least. Lance wants nothing more than to say something to fill the silence, but he remembers the plan that he proposed. If they wanted to make it out of here, they needed to be alert and listen for the slightest sign of trouble. Of course with the way their suits rustled each time they took a step forward, Lance figured they’d be caught long before they knew what hit them.
Their flashlights dance along the walls of the cave. With both their lights combined, they’re able to see twice as much. The cave really doesn’t offer anything picturesque to look at though. The jagged rocks line the walls, breaking off and then joining together again for what looks to be forever. Every now and then, the two find themselves having to climb through narrow passageways and crawl upwards before the path turns into normal, walkable tunnels again.
Their footsteps match together in time. Lance wonders how long it’s been since they started exploring deeper into the cave. He looks over at Keith who seems lost in thought as he looks at the walls nearest him. His hair swishes lightly across his face, his eyes sharp, focused, scanning ahead and taking in his surroundings. It really grinds on his nerves how handsome Keith is without putting in even an ounce of effort. If it weren’t for the patches of dirt littered across his paladin suit, Lance would think they were simply taking a stroll for fun.
Seriously man! Get it together!
They continue on. Lance tries to distract himself by thinking about what he’ll do once he reunites with the team. He definitely needs to give Coran a piece of his mind about updating his records and researching planets ahead of time before he sends them off on missions. Maybe after that he can get Hunk to whip up a fancy meal for him. But he still needs to head to the infirmary… and he can’t leave out the bath he has in mind…
After about another fifteen minutes, Lance says fuck it.
“Sooo, looks like the coast is clear?”
Keith startles a little from Lance speaking out of nowhere. It almost makes Lance want to laugh and apologize to him, but Keith scrunches his brows down before asking, “What makes you say that?”
“There’s like, no cave paintings down here,” Lance says. Keith looks confused so he elaborates. “That’s what people that live in caves do, don’t they? Pretty sure that’s something we watched in our Ancient and Modern World class at the Garrison.
Keith’s face still doesn’t change and Lance wonders what else there is to possibly be confused about.
“You know cave paintings right? Like the ones we saw before we found Blue?”
Something must’ve clicked in Keith’s brain because he suddenly has a look of understanding and nods at Lance.
“You totally never paid attention in class, did you?” Lance says, this time letting out a few laughs.
Keith elbows him lightly, and if Lance looks a bit closely he can see a tinge of color rising in his cheeks.
“Shut up. Those documentaries always made me sleepy.”
Lance chuckles but decides to give it a rest. He understands where Keith is coming from. Any time their professor didn’t feel like teaching, he’d always turned off a few lights in the classroom and press play before dozing off at his desk in the front. With the dim lights and the narrator’s mellow voice droning on and on, Lance could understand how anyone could fall asleep in those conditions.
The mood feels a lot lighter now. Lance had brought up the cave paintings as a joke, but now that he thinks about it, it makes him feel loads better. The lack of paintings surely must mean there haven’t been any cave dwellers for the past hundreds of years. And if no one has been down below to inhabit the cavern, that has to mean they’re safe.
“Well, just cause there are no paintings doesn’t mean there aren’t any monsters down here,” Keith chimes in.
And just like that, Lance’s stomach drops again. Yup, it’s only a matter of time before they get eaten by a giant centipede.
“I’m kidding.” Keith smirks over at Lance, a tiny lilt to his voice that shows he was definitely getting back at Lance for the earlier quip.
“Wise guy,” Lance grumbles under his breath.
Keith must hear it because he adds on, “Sorry, but I really don’t think there’s much of anything down in this cave. See, there aren’t any foot tracks or markings of any kind.” Keith points his flashlight towards the ground so that Lance will look. Sure enough, he sees the floor beneath them is smooth, free of any breaks or cracks.
“And the walls are also pretty spotless.” Keith shines his light towards the enclosure around them, the rock formation seeming naturally made and again, Lance notes there is nothing that shows they have any company with them.
He finally breathes a sigh of relief. When he looks over, he sees Keith look a little more reassured as well.
He must’ve been stressed about this whole situation too, Lance thinks to himself.
“Thanks,” Lance mumbles. “But remind me we need to work on your social skills when we get back to the ship.”
Just as Lance finishes, he hears a faint sound in the distance. He stops in his tracks and locks eyes with Keith who has also stopped.
It could’ve been his imagination, or maybe he moved in a funny way and that’s what caused him to hear what he just heard. But sure enough, he picks up on the sound again. It’s a quiet murmur, and it almost sounds familiar to him.
He continues forward, the sound still distant but increasing in volume. Keith is close at his heels, probably having come to the same conclusion as Lance.
Within a few minutes, they walk into another tunnel that leads into what looks like a wide grotto. There’s a large body of water in the middle with a narrow path that hugs the wall and gradually makes its way into an incline. The exit looks like it might be just a bit further beyond, but the sight of water has Lance fall to his knees.
“Oh thank god!” Lance cries with relief. He claps his hands together to give a quick prayer of thanks to literally any higher being of power before he quickly gets up and practically runs to the stream to get a drink. As he reaches out, his bandage comes loose again and dips into the water. Lance could care less as he soaks his hands down into the liquid and lifts it back up to his mouth to swallow.
He didn’t realize just how thirsty he had been. If he had to guess, he’d say they had been walking for close to an hour. The walk, combined with the shenanigans they endured before reaching this cave definitely had Lance feeling parched.
Lance continued drinking until he was satisfied, the cool water making him feel refreshed and energized again. When he looks around, he finds Keith closing up his control panel and making his way over next to Lance.
Keith crouches down and inspects the water. After deeming it safe enough, he brings his hand down and gathers a bit in his palm before bringing some to his lips and drinks. He’s more tactful than Lance about it, but the rapid motion in his movement shows that he is just as thirsty.
Without even meaning to, Lance winds up staring at Keith. A few months ago, this mission would’ve been the end for both of them The idea of being stranded together with no guarantee of being rescued would’ve had Lance rolling in despair. Because Keith can really be insufferable. And he still is at times, but not as much as before.
He’s not sure what changed exactly. But somehow Keith’s anger isn’t as intense as it used to be. And his eyes didn’t hold as much fire as it did in the past. At least not when he looks at Lance. Or maybe it’s just simply a different kind of look. Not that Lance is hoping it is.
Lance interrupts his own thoughts and splashes some water on his face. He really needs to get out of this cave already.
“Were you able to contact the team?”
Keith finally dips both his hands in the water and copies Lance, spraying water to his face and bringing his hand to the back of his neck. A few droplets hang in his hair, refusing to fall down until Keith shifts his head to look over at Lance.
“Not yet, the signal is still not that great. But it should work once we get closer to the exit.”
Lance nods and places his hands behind him to lean back. They’re not out of the woods yet, but it’s a relief to know the end of their journey may soon come to a close. He feels a dampness under his hand and looks down to find his gauze hanging off loosely around his palm. It’s only then he registers the dull throb coming from his wrist so he sits back up again to unfasten it.
Due to his earlier excitement, the wrapping is now soaked and feels uncomfortable to wear. He’s about ready to accept his losses and face the consequences of his actions before he feels Keith shuffle next to him, a bandage already in his hand.
“You really need to stop jumping head first into everything,” Keith says, reaching out to grasp Lance’s hand.
Before Keith is able to make contact, Lance snatches his hand away, looking at Keith with wide eyes. Keith looks back, concern written across his features with his hand slowly coming down to rest beside him.
Shit, that must’ve looked weird.
He’s not sure how many seconds pass by, but Lance feels his heartbeat quicken in his chest. He shouldn’t feel so caught off guard, but having Keith almost touch him terrifies him.
“Do you…” Keith starts, but then quickly closes his mouth. He looks like he’s contemplating something, figuring out if he should bring up this uneasy tension or let it slide. The internal debate weighs on him, but Keith pushes past it and continues, “Do you not want me to touch you?”
Shitshitshit.
Lance sputters a bit, not sure of what to say. Sure, he didn’t want Keith to attend to him, but he didn’t want to make him think he was angry at him.
Before Lance can come up with a good excuse, Keith drops the gauze into his hand.
“It’s okay. I was only trying to help, but if you don’t want any that’s fine.”
Lance is surprised at how level Keith’s voice sounds. He thinks maybe he’s in the clear, but when he chances a glance up, he finds Keith’s face scrunched with rejection. He gets up to leave, but Lance reaches out and snatches his arm.
“Wait.”
Keith stills in his movement. Lance can feel his blood rush to his heart again. He feels dizzy, but that’s silly. This wasn’t a life or death situation, it’s just Keith for crying out loud. The churn in his stomach reminds him of how scared he feels, but Lance takes a deep breath to get a hold of his bearings.
“I’m sorry Keith.” He fidgets for a bit, playing with a strand of hair to keep himself grounded in the moment. He really doesn’t know what he should say, how he should bring this up to his rival-turned-somewhat-friend, and he’s about to admit as much before Keith starts up again.
“It’s okay, Lance. I think I sort of understand.” Keith’s voice has turned quiet, almost as if he’s trying to not scare away a small animal.
“You do?”
“Yeah.”
Okay, so this is happening. Lance grabs the bandage wrap and tosses it over to Keith, who catches it with a confused look on his face. He’s starting to think this might be his default face after all. He holds up his wrist out to him, not even bothering with any words, and instead offers a small lopsided grin. Lance still feels his heart trembling inside his chest, but he ignores it. He needs to get past this already.
It’s a little awkward. Okay, it’s very awkward. Lance and Keith have really come so far in their friendship but that doesn’t really mean they spend too much time together either. Sure they get along during training and Lance only mildly feels angry at his mullet every now and then, so again, they’re not the sort of besties that hang out and chill together on the regular like he does with Pidge and Hunk.
Keith is reaching over to him, holding his hand out and waiting, as if asking Lance for permission. He gives a slight nod to him and with that, Keith finally grabs his hand and holds it with his palm facing upward.
The contact makes Lance want to immediately curl in on himself. To say it’s been a while since someone’s held his hand like this would be an understatement. The warmth from Keith’s hand has him trembling a bit, the touch foreign and invasive.
But it’s gentle. Oh so gentle. The kind of gentle that he honestly thought Keith would be incapable of. After a second Lance starts to think that he can do this. With his other hand, Keith unravels a bit more of the gauze and slides his thumb over Lance’s palm to keep his hand steady.
An involuntary shiver runs down his spine, not used to the contact since for the past few years he’s hardly let anyone touch his hands so freely. Keith’s thumb is there, not moving, at least not until he has to shift it away to get the gauze over his palm, delicately tracing over the creases where his skin folds to continue with the dressing before he pauses.
It’s a subtle movement and soft. Way too soft. The sort of soft that has Lance take in a sharp breath. He hopes Keith doesn’t notice it, but when he looks up, he sees Keith seems somewhat distracted. And there are those eyes again. With Keith looking downwards, Lance is able to see how long his eyelashes are, how they fan out against his skin, the colors so contrast against each other it almost looks…
Pretty.
It keeps Lance calm, observing Keith, but then he feels it. Keith repeats the motion against his palm a second time, a thoughtful look in his eyes. As though he’s noticed something for the first time.
And that’s when the panic sets in.
Warning bells start ringing inside Lance’s head. He knows he thinks to himself. It’s only a matter of time before Keith will decide to comment about it out loud. And if Lance knows anything about Keith, it’s that the guy says it like he sees it. Lance is known to be loud and obnoxious, always blurting out the first thing that comes to mind, but Keith? That guy can’t read a room to save his life.
“Woah,” Keith begins, eyebrows lifting up in slight surprise. “Your hands are actually really s-”
Nope, no, can’t do this. Lance yanks his hand from Keith’s grasp, mind immediately fixating on the word he was about to say.
“Shit, sorry! Didn’t mean to press too hard. Are you ok?” Keith reaches again for Lance’s hand, slow again to ask for silent permission.
Lance hesitates. In all honesty, he thinks he should give himself a pat on the back for a job well done and just call it a day. He’s officially stepped out of his comfort zone and all this touching has Lance feeling way too jittery and on edge.
But he can’t deny that the briefest touch feels slightly addicting as well. He looks down to observe his long and slender fingers before drifting his gaze to Keith’s, whose were thicker, the knuckles jutting at a sharper angle compared to Lance’s. There are large veins that catch his attention, running like rivulets over the top of his hand. It’s almost unfair how picturesque they look. Even after placing all of his weight down in those hands, Keith seems to hold on with no effort and a feather-like touch. It felt so inviting and warm.
Just like home.
Before he even begins to think about where that thought just came from, he looks at Keith and gives a slight nod. Keith seems relieved as he gently takes Lance’s hand back in his own to re-bandage his wrist.
Oh Lance thinks to himself as he watches Keith meticulously wrap the bandage over the palm of his hand, lacing it around his thumb before crossing it down to his wrist and wrapping it around there a few times. The way Keith’s hands dance in this repeated motion seems graceful, almost mesmerizing, and when the skin contact between the two of them gradually becomes less, Lance finally feels collected again.
After a few moments of silently watching, he finds the courage to speak. “It didn’t hurt by the way. I was just…”
The words are trapped in his throat again, at a loss for what to say.
Keith ties off the bandage and drops Lance’s hand, allowing him to inspect it. Lance turns his wrist back and forth, surprised at how efficiently Keith had worked on him, the wrapping not too loose and not too tight either. It’s a huge relief the process is finally over, but there is a niggling at the back of his brain that seeks out the warmth of Keith’s hand again.
The guilt still weighs on him though. He knows he should address it, that he can’t leave things hanging like this. Not after Keith was so patient and caring with him. He deserves to know.
“You know, I kinda noticed this a while back. It was on a whim really.” Keith replies, ever the stoic.
Lance feels his heartbeat thundering in his ears, the thinnest layer of sweat beginning to form along his temple.
“I didn’t think anything of it at first. Honestly, I thought you just hated me that much… that you were repulsed by the fact that I’m half-Galra.”
What? Although Lance felt like he was suffocating with how warm he felt being under the spotlight, it now feels as though someone splashed a bucket of ice cold water in his face. How could Keith? About him being? He would never!
He needs to tell him as much.
“No way! Keith that’s not—”
“I know.” Keith offers a small smile as reassurance. “When I started really paying attention I realized you did it with everyone. That made me feel better, but it didn’t solve the mystery at hand.” He tapped Lance’s hand, almost as if saying “get it” without actually saying it out loud.
The closest Keith will ever get to making a joke. But even if it was pretty lame of a joke, he’s happy that Keith was able to figure out the problem isn’t him.
Now Keith is the one fidgeting, drawing small shapes along the floor of the cavern using droplets of water that had fallen there. He continues while looking down at the ground, “You don’t have to say it if you don’t want to — the reason you’ve been acting all jumpy. I don’t even know why I started talking about it. I guess what I’m trying to say is, it’s alright. You don’t have to have your guard up all the time.”
Lance tries processing everything Keith just told him. It’s… a lot. Way more than he thought he’d ever have to think about when he accepted the mission this morning. He truly thought he was being slick about the whole thing.
“Thanks, but it’s really nothing. I mean nothing in the grand scheme of things, y’know?”
Lance knows he’s fumbling through his words. Keith silently looks at him, graciously or mercilessly Lance doesn’t know anymore, but either way Lance wants to get this out, so he continues.
“Geez, a long time has passed since someone first told me about it. It happened in middle school, I think? It was during soccer practice. I was kinda dicking around and ended up jamming my finger back trying to get the ball. I remember my best bud checked it out for me, y’know 'cause I was freaking out and thought I broke my hand or something.” Lance chuckles recalling how dramatic he was, swearing up and down that his soccer career was officially over before it had even started.
“Anyway,” Lance continues shaking his head to find his place again. “There he is, checking to make sure if I’m ok and that’s when he tells me that I have really soft hands.”
He takes a risk and glances up at Keith, checking to make sure he’s not laughing or scoffing at how ridiculous he sounds right now. He wouldn’t blame him honestly but when he looks back up, Keith looks serious. His eyebrows are furrowed with concentration, lips kept tightly sealed together. Lance takes a breath before he continues.
“Of course, I took it as a compliment. I was practically gloating, telling him about all the fun products my sisters use that smell really nice, but then he goes, ‘Wow, it must be great to have such an easy life.’ ”
Lance pauses in his recollection. Looking back, he knows his friend meant it as a throwaway comment, a joke even. But god, even just saying it aloud made him feel so repulsed. It’s so fucked up, he knows that. But back then…
“So then what?” Keith asks, his tone direct, but with an ounce of something else. Annoyance?
“Would you believe me if I tell you I don’t really remember? I mean, I’m pretty sure I laughed it off. How else do you respond to something like that?” Lance says flippantly.
Keith starts to open his mouth to comment, but Lance is faster.
“Nope. That was rhetorical! I already know what you would’ve said. Or more like, what you wouldn’t have said, 'cause you’d probably just punch them in the face or something, right?
Keith smirks. “Maybe.”
Lance laughs at that. Typical.
“So after that, that comment just really stayed with me. It kept coming up again and again. Of course, no one said it like he did, they genuinely kept going on about how soft my hands are. But it meant something different to me now. I began helping out more around the house. Not that I was lazy before, but if I ever found myself lying around I started to feel more guilty. And then I thought maybe if others were already noticing, they’d start coming to the same conclusion or whatever. I mean, how many others have touched my hands before him and thought the same, but were nice enough to not say anything about it?
“Lance!” Keith calls, gripping his shoulder and shaking him out of his stupor. Lance jumps, shocked at how out of breath he feels. But it felt good. The weight on his shoulder keeps him grounded and he sighs, suddenly feeling very tired.
“That guy was a dick, Lance. Your hands have nothing to do with your work ethic.” Keith replies, his hand still lingering on Lance’s shoulder, offering support.
“I know. It was middle school, everyone kinda sucks in middle school. I get it, but it makes sense, doesn’t it? I mean, just look at you. Your hands are way manlier.” Lance holds Keith hand up and sure enough there are callous along his fingers, and the inside of his hand. The thick hardened layers of skin are rough and dry and he runs his fingers through to feel it. The scars littered throughout tell him stories of how much Keith has endured up till now, of all the trials and errors he’s had to face to get to where he is today. It has him in awe at how different they look from his own hands that are so velvety and plump.
“Even before getting to know you, I could tell how hard working you were.” Lance continues.
“Manlier? So having smooth skin means you’re not?”
Lance rolls his eyes at that. “Ugh, hell no. Toxic masculinity can fucking die. You’re right, that came out wrong. I just meant that your hands tell a whole different story. It’s something anyone would admire.”
This time it’s Keith who scoffs, pulling one leg in so he can rest his elbow against it. “I just got into a lot of fights,” he starts. “I wasn’t exactly a model student or anything.”
“But you had grit! Perseverance. I could tell that you didn’t have anything handed to you. You just took life by the reins and just…owned it.” Lance thinks back to the shack they all went to in the middle of the desert after they’d rescued Shiro. He couldn’t believe Keith had been living there on his own since he was booted from the Garrison. The isolated location not only meant Keith had no company to pass the days with, but it also meant he had no one to rely on for help. God, what could that have felt like? To know if you didn’t put in enough effort, you could easily lose it all?
“No,” Lance continues. “No, you definitely didn’t have it easy. Not like me at least. Maybe he was right, maybe my life was—.”
“What’s wrong with that?” Keith interrupts. His jaw is tense, fists now clenched, and a vein jutting along his neck. His eyes hold no ounce of the warm gaze from before, instead turning stern and frigid. This was the Keith he was used to. Brash and defensive and ready to brawl against anyone who looked at him the wrong way.
“Not everyone needs to have it rough all the time. You grew up in a loving home, with people who love and care about you.” His voice trembles, softening a bit, but still terse as he continues, “But I know you, Lance. I know didn’t take an ounce of that love for granted. And I know how hard of a worker you are. It’s not just me, everyone on the team knows it too.”
His hand clutches into his hair and he lets out a deep exhale. It looks as though he has more to say, but holds himself back from exploding completely.
They both sit quietly next to one another. Both of Lance’s legs have shifted in so he can hug his knees, an unconscious move that was meant to provide solace.
“For what it’s worth, I think your hands are perfect.”
It’s a whisper. A hushed declaration that Lance is not sure if it was meant to be heard or not. Whatever it is, it has him blushing fiercely, his face heating up from the tips of his ears down to the back of his neck. He finds his heart pounding against his ribcage again, but this time for different reasons.
What does that even mean? There’s no way my hands are perfect, Lance wonders to himself.
“I think they are,” Keith says and Lance realizes he accidentally said what he was thinking aloud. Keith doesn’t let up this time elaborating on his thoughts and putting everything out there. “Your hands are warm and comforting. You’re always there to reassure everyone and listen to them. And sure you may not hold anyone’s hand or anything, but you’re still a touchy guy y’know. I’ve seen the way you hug Hunk when he fails in the kitchen or the way you pat Pidge’s arm when they feel defeated.”
Keith holds a fond look on his face, recounting all these moments they’ve spent together since becoming paladins.
“Your hands are gentle. I’ve seen the way you play with kids on each of the different planets we land on. You never use excessive force. But at the same time, they’re dependable, ready to catch anyone who might fall. And when we’ve fought together side by side, you’re absolutely unstoppable.”
Lance is flustered as is. Who is this guy and what has he done with Keith? But he thinks back on the whole journey they’ve spent together and recalls how patient, gentle, and understanding he’s been. It’s a whole different side he’s never experienced before, and it’s not all that bad if he thinks about it.
He coughs into his hand. “Umm, wow. Thanks. I really never thought about it like that. Too bad others haven’t really seen it that way though. I don’t really have the best track record when it comes to being with someone else.”
“I’m sure if anyone gave you their heart, you’d treat it with so much care.” Keith shifts a little. His hand comes towards Lance’s and now he finds that he doesn’t hesitate like before. His finger reaches out delicately and Lance offers his hand in return. “They’re beautiful. Not because they’re soft or because you don't have any marks or scars. They’re beautiful because they’re your hands.”
He feels his shoulder bump into Keith’s and wow, when did they get so close? Just when he feels the contact, his eyes peek up and he finds Keith already looking at him. This close, Lance sees how dark they are, a galaxy of their own that he could probably get lost in if he stares into them long enough. But when he continues looking, the black shifts slightly and morphs into a deep violet. His nose bumps along Lance’s and he can feel his breath brush along his own lips.
He should say something. Or move. First move, then say something?
Lance can’t think straight. He feels Keith’s hand crawl into his, their fingers interlocking now and again he feels a shiver wrack through his whole body. It feels nice. It feels right.
Keith’s lips open and Lance immediately looks down at them. He never took the time to look at them before, but up close he notes how firm they look and slightly chapped. Then a thought he never imagined runs through his mind like a flash of lightning.
I wonder if they’re softer than they look.
If Keith said something, he’s pretty sure he missed it. He’s about to say just as much, but then his stomach growls, long and abrupt.
They pull away from each other, startled by the sudden sound. Keith’s dazed look from a second ago now shifts. He focuses on Lance’s face again, really seeing him there and it looks like reality has hit him.
“I’m sorry—”
“That was—”
They both speak at the same time, words getting lost in each other. Lance is about to stand but realizes their hands are still joined together. He pulls away and brings his hand up.
“Let’s get out of here already.”
They take the path along the wall and begin their exit. It’s about fifty steps before they see a bit of light at the end of the tunnel and Lance practically runs out, ready to bask in the sunlight. The sun has shifted in the sky, but thankfully not by too much. The quiet rustling of leaves and vines against the wind reassures him that the enemies aren’t anywhere nearby and with that, he lets out a sigh of relief.
When he turns around, he sees Keith emerging from the cave, busy as he types something into his control panel.
“Just sent coordinates to Pidge. They should be here any minute now.”
“Cool.”
***
Pidge arrives using the cloaking device on Green. They must’ve wanted to make sure to not attract the Fovlorians attention in any way. After picking them up, Pidge apologizes profusely to Lance and Keith, explaining how they spent every minute trying to track them down and giving up, hoping they’d find a different solution when teaming up with Shiro and Allura. Keith and Lance are quiet as they listen, thankful for the small talk to keep them occupied. Lance’s hand tingles, but he ignores it, blaming it on the injury he sustained during the mission.
When they finally arrive back Lance bolts, sidestepping the team and giving everyone the excuse that he’s tired, but he’ll debrief them later.
He walks right past the infirmary, heading straight to his room. It’s not that major of an injury anyway. He’ll just sleep it off and if it’s still bothering him in the morning he’ll make sure to head in a healing pod. He just needs to lay in bed for a while. There’s a lot he needs to think about.