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You find it harder and harder to keep a smile on your face, you look at the mirror in the bathroom at the base: you have dark circles under your eyes that are noticeable in the distance, your eyes are a little red, you picked up the comb to have your hair more neatly combed. You take a deep breath in and out to keep your emotions focused.
You've been trying to cheer him up as much as possible for several days, but you were crushed when you heard from the kids that Optimus had been infected by a disease. You thought it was impossible for bots to have a disease, which proved to you that you were not so different.
Seeing him lying on the birth gave you a lot to think about, he was moving his chest slowly, his face on the right side was affecting the corrosion like a rusty car. Despite Ratchet's warnings you decided to rush over to him, Optimus looked at me with a weak smile, even in his state he was trying to reassure you. But it was worse than thought Ratchet was trying different forms of cure, Arcee and Bulkhead were looking for a way to intercept Decepticon Warship and Bumblebee was taking care of the children.
You stayed by his side to keep his mind off his situation, talking to him about work, some book he was interested in, some music….
But the results of his physical condition were affecting more and more not only Optimus but the whole team.
You had known Optimus for quite some time before the kids showed up, you were a soldier in charge of the maintenance of the base and its equipment, the one in charge that Fowler left.
The first time you saw all of them you almost went to the hospital from the heart attack of seeing something the quadruple, totally metallic and just looking at you could swat you like a fly.
Since then, I had been closer to them, especially Prime. His voice, his curiosity about the planet and his philosophy. Just like with your technicalities and your outlook on life.
But seeing him like that was tearing you apart, like seeing the glow of his optics was slowly fading. You felt helpless, after what all this bot had done for humanity, it couldn't end like this you refused to believe it.
-Y/N… - said Optimus with his voice somewhat muffled and without forcing it, the bot was having a hard time speaking.
-Optimus, remember what we talked about. Don't overexert yourself - I said as I saw a servo approaching closer to me.
-Come, I want to bring you closer…
You listened to him and got closer to his face that was getting more and more corroded, your chest hurt every time you saw him like that.
-Y/N I want to thank you for staying by my side all this time….
-I'm sure you'll be fine Ratchet will find something, we just need time, just hang in there - you said with some insistence as you saw his servo move to your face and gently caress your cheek with his digit.
-You don't have to overexert yourself… I know the situation is critical, I want you to listen to me and promise me. That if I die, you will go ahead without….
-Don't you dare say it - you said looking down I felt my heart was breaking and I couldn't hold back any more feelings - You can't leave, Prime. If you leave I don't know what's going to happen to all of us, what's going to happen to the Decepticons, how Earth is going to end. You have to survive… You told me you'd show me Cybertron in case you win. I don't want to… I don't want to… - you said with your eyes full of tears and you were starting to tremble and sob. You were breaking down, all the pain you have accumulated these days was pouring out, your speech was gone as you felt the knot in your stomach, your sobs were the most heard thing in med bay.
The anguish and pain was the only thing on your mind, until you felt some servos approach his chest as if you were tucked into a big cocoon, you heard the buzzing of his faint but still existent spark. His warmth, it was like a way to calm you down in the face of the sad reality that you didn't want to accept but you both knew it was going to happen.
-Y/N… could you do one thing for me?
You stood listening as you tried to wipe your eyes - Y/N… Yes, what do you need?
-Could I hear you sing?
He said it with a tone of innocence and genuineness, you had told him that you had ever sung, ever hummed to him but not sung. You came up with the song that would fit the moment.
You started with a somewhat low and insecure melody while he caressed your back. You followed the slow rhythm without pause, uniquely calm. your hand went to his chest plate. There was no sickness, no sadness, no pain. Only the calm and peace that Optimus had long gone unheard, he closed his optics concentrating on your voice little by little he was feeling that little by little the well of sparks was calling him, he wanted to say goodbye but he could not move his body or speak. But he was seeing your face singing, seeing a smile in a long time that gave him joy.
A painless memory of the war, just something innocent….
“Y/N… thank you…”
When you finished singing silence was heard, his hand stopped caressing you and he collapsed… Then Ratchet had come in to check Optimus' vitals but it was too late.
He was gone. Your heart couldn't take it, the world went dark around you.
You felt the tears… You couldn't hear the words of comfort. The autobots around you tried to talk to you but their voices could not reach you.
You had isolated yourself from everyone, you did not distinguish the passage of time, you did not leave the room and remained like a ball in bed several days after his departure.
You got up for a moment and passed by his room on impulse to see that everything was still the same except for one thing, a datapad under his bed.
You touched it to see archived images of photos of Optimus and you. Like some kind of letter:
If ever I should leave I want you to live… Live for me… Keep your experiences all about you.
Tears came to your eyes again but you took the datapad and hugged it close to your chest.
After all you had everything about me just as you had everything about me.
My immortal.