Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to “Nerdy Nighthawks 🤓🦅” at 6:58 am

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: EVERYONE WAKE UP

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: ITS NOSWING OUTSIDE!!!

hot_chocolate_boy: what is “noswing?”

ruthespian: um look out the window dumbshit

hot_chocolate_boy: can’t, my brother forbids the blinds being opened before 10 am since he’s a big baby about natural light.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Damnit I meant snowing ( •_•)

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Whatever

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: PETE GO OUTSIDE Its like a scene straight out of Miyazaki. Its SNOWING!!!!!

ruthespian: do you think theyll cancel school?

ruthespian: i hope they do i have so many plans today

ruthespian: i mean not yet but i will

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Don’t know. Maybe

hot_chocolate_boy: uh oh, gang, i just got a text from grace.

ruthespian: fuck

hot_chocolate_boy: “Hi, Peter. I’m sure you’ve seen the tragedy unfolding outside. But don’t worry. I know we planned to work on our English project during school today. I’ve already called the office and told them we don’t need a snow day. I will text you an update when they call me back.”

hot_chocolate_boy: she isn’t serious, is she?

ruthespian: *double* fuck

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Does she have no SOUL?!?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Hey if school DOES get canceled who wants to come to my place and have a Bleach marathon?? My uncle will be at work all day

ruthespian: hell yes

hot_chocolate_boy: i might have trouble getting a ride, but i will see what i can do!

hot_chocolate_boy: i just hope the roads will stay clear enough to drive through safely.

hot_chocolate_boy: and that my brother will actually wake up enough to handle a car.

hot_chocolate_boy: a lot of possible variables at play.

ruthespian: you know what else has a lot of possible variables to play with?

ruthespian: 😏😏😏

hot_chocolate_boy: oh my god ruth really? it’s still morning.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: SCHOOL CALLED

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: EXPECT THEM SOON

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: IT IS CANCELLLEEEDDD!!!! ╰(▔∀▔)╯

hot_chocolate_boy: let’s fucking go!

hot_chocolate_boy: what time should we be at your place, richie?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Anytime!

ruthespian: be there in 30 min richie

hot_chocolate_boy: going to go ask my bro, hopefully i will see you guys soon!

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to SleazySpankoffski at 7:00 am

hot_chocolate_boy: hey ted, snow day today.

hot_chocolate_boy: any chance you can drive me over to richie’s today before you go to work?

SleazySpankoffski: yea h sure man i can do that whenvyr im not going into work today untole 11,,

hot_chocolate_boy: richie can probably drop me back at home, too.

SleazySpankoffski: exclent cause ive gto a hot date 2nihgt B)

hot_chocolate_boy: oh god.

hot_chocolate_boy: is it charlotte again?

SleazySpankoffski: ;););)

hot_chocolate_boy: first ruth now you…

hot_chocolate_boy: i can’t even deal with you right now.

SleazySpankoffski: we cna leave in10

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to Grace 🙏 at 7:12 am

hot_chocolate_boy: snow day, by the way.

hot_chocolate_boy: despite all your efforts.

hot_chocolate_boy: we can work on the project tomorrow morning, if you want?

Grace 🙏: I am positively indignant. How can they give us a mandatory snow day? We, as children, need to learn.

hot_chocolate_boy: right…

Grace 🙏: I’ll see you first thing tomorrow, Pete, to work and to draft a complaint letter to the school board :)

hot_chocolate_boy: whatever you say, grace.

bubblegumpopular sent a message to “💞💫THE GIRLIES💫💞” at 7:26 am

bubblegumpopular: girls!!!! snow day!!!!

ladystacy: this is sooooo exciting!!

flannel-is-the-new-pink: this shit rules 😎

flannel-is-the-new-pink: no fucking school *and* i get to stay home alone while my dad is on a business trip

bubblegumpopular: no parents?? girl plz tell me we can come over 2 hang out

ladystacy: omg good idea brenda!

flannel-is-the-new-pink: ugh i wish

flannel-is-the-new-pink: my dad would freak tf out if he found out

flannel-is-the-new-pink: ✨ worst dad ever ✨

ladystacy: sorry girl.,

bubblegumpopular: do u want 2 come 2 my house instead?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: cant, my dads gone and wherever he goes so does ms tessburger. ive got no ride and i dont think walking in this weather is a good idea

bubblegumpopular: awww

ladystacy: we will miss u girl!!!!

flannel-is-the-new-pink: love yall, cya @ school tmrw 😙😙😙

ruthespian sent a message to “Nerdy Nighthawks 🤓🦅” at 7:32 am

ruthespian: am here

ruthespian: ding dong fucker let me in

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: SHIT sorry mb I’m coming!!!

hot_chocolate_boy: wait two seconds and i’ll be there as well.

ruthespian: hurry up peter smh

hot_chocolate_boy: i’m technically going 5 miles over the speed limit.

ruthespian: not fast enough

hot_chocolate_boy: what did i do to you, ruth?

ruthespian: 🖕

ruthespian: pete?

ruthespian: dont you have something to say back to me?

ruthespian: oh fuck hes here

ruthespian: richie open the goddamn door he looks like hes gonna kick my ass

ruthespian: hellllppp meeeegxfdzxgyffyghgv

ruthespian sent a message to hot_chocolate_boy at 3:42 pm

ruthespian: peeeetttteeeee can u bring me a root beer from the fridge

hot_chocolate_boy: yup!

hot_chocolate_boy: can you ask if richie wants anything?

ruthespian: no way hes wayyy too focused on his weird anime

hot_chocolate_boy: i’ll bring him some extra popcorn, then.

ruthespian: hey wait can you stick your head outside and bring back some snow?

ruthespian: as long as its still going i wanna make a snowball 😈

hot_chocolate_boy: geez fine, give me a second.

hot_chocolate_boy: it’s freezing outside, but i have one. if it keeps snowing like this all through the night we might not have school tomorrow either.

ruthespian: im counting on it :)))

hot_chocolate_boy: mhm i bet you are.

hot_chocolate_boy: okay, are you throwing this at richie?

ruthespian: you can do it for me… would catch him off guard even more!!

hot_chocolate_boy: why do i let you convince me to do these things…

hot_chocolate_boy: fine.

hot_chocolate_boy: be back in a minute.

ruthespian: muahahahaha

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ sent a message to #1 Beanie's Customer at 6:33 pm

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Hey what time do you think youre gonna be home from work?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: I told Pete you could bring him home tonight

#1 Beanie's Customer: Hi, Richie!

#1 Beanie's Customer: I should be leaving in a minute or two, hopefully.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: OK

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Be Careful I think its still snowing outside

#1 Beanie's Customer: Wow, really?

#1 Beanie's Customer: That’s… actually not good. One second, Richie.

#1 Beanie's Customer: Nevermind, Richie, I won’t be able to drive Pete home. My car is covered in snow and it’s going to take a while to get it out.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Ack!!!

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Peter says he can see if his brother can bring him home…

#1 Beanie's Customer: He’s Ted Spankoffski’s little brother, right?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Yeah!

#1 Beanie's Customer: Ted’s at work with me right now. If I can’t get out, I doubt he can either.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: RIP

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Imma ask Pete what he wants to do ╥﹏╥

#1 Beanie's Customer: Okay!

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: He says he can walk home

#1 Beanie's Customer: Alright then.

#1 Beanie's Customer: I’ve got to get back to work. Text me if you need anything.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Will do!!!!!

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to SleazySpankoffski at 8:01 pm

hot_chocolate_boy: omw home ted.

Chapter Text

SleazySpankoffski sent a message to hot_chocolate_boy at 11:32 pm

SleazySpankoffski: btw im spnding th enight w charlotte

SleazySpankoffski: cya @ the hhouse in the mprning

ruthespian sent a message to “Nerdy Nighthawks 🤓🦅” at 1:15 am

ruthespian: [attachment: having the time of our fuckin lives]

ruthespian: suck it peter!!!!

ruthespian: if ur grandpa eyes cant see that is in fact richie n me downing an entire pint of root beer + vanilla ice cream

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Its called a Root Beer float Ruth

ruthespian: shut it

ruthespian: anywayssss well see u at school tmrw peter!!!

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: GNIGHT PETE!!

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ sent a message to hot_chocolate_boy at 4:46 am

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: FUCK

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Please remind me in the morning that I FUCKING HATE RUTH!!!!

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: SHE THREW ANOTHER SNOWBALL AT MEEEE

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: I mean technically you threw the first one but

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: When did she even get the second one???? TF???

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: And she had to do it RIGHT at the exciting part when Ichigo enters the soul society (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Alr sorry Ill stop blowing up your text messages when youre probably asleep

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: You got home OK right?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: K gonna try and get back to sleep. Text you in the morning Pete !!

Grace 🙏 sent a message to hot_chocolate_boy at 7:05 am

Grace 🙏: Good morning, Peter. What is a good time to show up at school for you? I would say we need at least an hour to work on the project. Would 8:30 work for you?

#1 Beanie's Customer sent a message to Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ at 7:24 am

#1 Beanie's Customer: I made you and Ruth some pancakes downstairs.

#1 Beanie's Customer: And the school called, there’s a delay while they get the last few roads plowed.

#1 Beanie's Customer: So, take your time waking up.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Thanks Uncle Paul!!!

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: You can drive Ruth and I to school right?

#1 Beanie's Customer: Of course. Does Ruth have her school bag with her?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Left it in her locker

#1 Beanie's Customer: Alright then.

#1 Beanie's Customer: We can leave whenever you guys want.

ladystacy sent a message to “💞💫THE GIRLIES💫💞” at 7:34 am

ladystacy: morning girlies!

bubblegumpopular: gm!!

bubblegumpopular: its nice being able 2 sleep in + not have 2 rush 2 school

ladystacy: def

ladystacy: how was ur night home alone stephie??

bubblegumpopular: maybe shes not awake yet

ladystacy: thats our steph, always sleeping in 💕

ladystacy: see u @ school then ladies

bubblegumpopular: 🩷🩷🩷

SleazySpankoffski sent a message to hot_chocolate_boy at 7:41 am

SleazySpankoffski: pete, are y ou at home?

SleazySpankoffski: text me bacc loser

SleazySpankoffski: hAng on letme jsut call yuo

SleazySpankoffski: pete pick uoppp !’!!!

SleazySpankoffski: dude whre are u for rea l

SleazySpankoffski: call em bac k when you see thsi plz

SleazySpankoffski sent a message to #1 Beanie's Customer at 7:45 am

SleazySpankoffski: hey yuo noodle

SleazySpankoffski: shit waiit srory abt the nick nam e

SleazySpankoffski: paul is peter at your hhouse?

#1 Beanie's Customer: Hi, Ted.

#1 Beanie's Customer: He’s not. The kids say he left last night to go home. I haven’t seen him since yesterday morning.

SleazySpankoffski: dude i thoguht you were gonna drive him back

#1 Beanie's Customer: Sorry, change of plans. My car was too snowed in, you remember how it was at work yesterday, right?

SleazySpankoffski: fUCK

#1 Beanie's Customer: Everything alright?

SleazySpankoffski: uh,. obvoiuosly NOT paulll

#1 Beanie's Customer: Wow you really make a lot of typos.

SleazySpankoffski: can it matthews.i gtota find my lil bro

#1 Beanie's Customer: Peter is missing?

#1 Beanie's Customer: Did he not make it home last night?

SleazySpankoffski: well hes nto here NOW

#1 Beanie's Customer: Shit. How can I help?

SleazySpankoffski: hes noit returning my texts

SleazySpankoffski: ask your weird nephew tot ext him

#1 Beanie's Customer: Sure thing.

#1 Beanie's Customer: We’re gonna find him, Ted. It’s gonna be okay.

SleazySpankoffski: i fuckin hate optometrists

#1 Beanie's Customer: What??

SleazySpankoffski: fuck i meant optomests

SleazySpankoffski: optimests

SleazySpankoffski: OPTIMISTS

SleazySpankoffski: the fuckin happy people. god this shit sucks

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ sent a message to hot_chocolate_boy at 7:50 am

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: HI

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: I thought you were just sleeping in (like a LOSER) since you didnt text me back but

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: My uncle says he got a text from your brother??? And he wanted me to text you for some reason ¯\_(シ)_/¯

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Theyre acting shady abt it. Is something wrong??

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Text me back please !!!

ruthespian sent a message to hot_chocolate_boyat 7:51 am

ruthespian: yo

ruthespian: answer richies text you dork

SleazySpankoffski sent a message to #1 Beanie's Customer at 7:55 am

SleazySpankoffski: well??

#1 Beanie's Customer: Nothing yet Ted. I’ll let you know the instant one of them gets a reply.

SleazySpankoffski: fuuuuukc

SleazySpankoffski: should i like,,, do smthing?>??

#1 Beanie's Customer: I don’t know… Let’s not overthink anything.

#1 Beanie's Customer: Is it possible he went to school early, not knowing about the delay?

#1 Beanie's Customer: What time did you come home?

SleazySpankoffski: maybe half an hr ago?

SleazySpankoffski: prob too early for that

#1 Beanie's Customer: I can ask the kids if he had any reason to go in early.

#1 Beanie's Customer: Actually, hang on, just so I don’t have to be the middleman.

#1 Beanie's Customer created “Group Chat 11” at 7:56 am

#1 Beanie's Customer added SleazySpankoffski, Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ, and ruthespian to “Group Chat 11”

#1 Beanie's Customer usent a message to “Group Chat 11” at 7:56 am

#1 Beanie's Customer: Okay, Ted, Richie, and Ruth, now we’re all in one space.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: What’s going on???

#1 Beanie's Customer: Well… we’re not exactly sure where Pete is right now.

SleazySpankoffski: eihter he didnt come home lst night or he left early thsi morning

ruthespian: wuh woh

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Ruth be SERIOUS

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: for ONCE

#1 Beanie's Customer: We thought maybe he went to school early without knowing there was a delay. Is that something he normally does?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Not usually…

ruthespian: didnt he have that project to do w/ grace for english?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: OH RIGHT

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ added Grace 🙏 to “Group Chat 11”

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Hey Grace!

ruthespian renamed “Group Chat 11” to “scooby doo motherfuckers”

ruthespian: clue time B)

Grace 🙏: Hello. What is this group chat for?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: sorry LOL I didn’t mean to drag you in here without asking but

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Any chance Peter is with you right now???

#1 Beanie's Customer: We would really appreciate your help.

Grace 🙏: No… We were supposed to meet up this morning to work but because of the delay I haven’t left yet. I texted him about showing up later and he didn’t respond to me.

ruthespian: fuck

Grace 🙏: Language!

ruthespian: oh stfu

Grace 🙏: That is exactly the kind of behavior that can get you into serious trouble, Ruth! You should be ashamed.

#1 Beanie's Customer: Okay, guys, let’s all calm down.

SleazySpankoffski: prude

#1 Beanie's Customer: Ted!

SleazySpankoffski: what?

ruthespian: woah i didnt know petes bro was cool

#1 Beanie's Customer: Grace, is it possible he missed your text for whatever reason and is at school right now?

Grace 🙏: Maybe, I can see it happening, though admittedly rather unlikely. Pete is good about checking his texts and if he showed up early to no one else being there, I’m sure he would have thought to check back in or maybe go back home.

SleazySpankoffski: fuck

ruthespian: fuck

ruthespian: JINX

SleazySpankoffski: ah crap

Grace 🙏: Language!

ruthespian: hahahaha petes bro owes me a soda

SleazySpankoffski: i cant believe im having this conversation rn

#1 Beanie's Customer: Well, thank you anyways Grace. You’ve been a big help.

Grace 🙏: No worries! I always find it my duty to help anyone who asks for it. We should all follow the charitable instinct in our hearts.

ruthespian: sooooo what do we do now

#1 Beanie's Customer: Why don’t we swing by the school?

#1 Beanie's Customer: I know it’s still early but I would feel better if we checked now instead of waiting.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: OK

SleazySpankoffski: il hang out at hte house in case hec omes

ruthespian: operation scooby doo is a go!

Chapter Text

#1 Beanie's Customer sent a message to “scooby doo motherfuckers” at 8:17 am

#1 Beanie's Customer: Richie, Ruth, you two head in first, I’ll rejoin you once I’ve parked.

ruthespian: gotcha

SleazySpankoffski: keep me uodated

SleazySpankoffski: as soon as you see ANYTHGN

#1 Beanie's Customer: Of course, Ted.

SleazySpankoffski: i hate having to be nice ti you

SleazySpankoffski: hey w8 arent you supposed to be drivin g?

#1 Beanie's Customer: I said I was parking, Ted.

SleazySpankoffski: oh right

SleazySpankoffski: let me have this im stressed

#1 Beanie's Customer: Okay I’m heading in. Richie where are you two right now?mvkvjnf’b,

SleazySpankoffski: paul?????

#1 Beanie's Customer: Christ, sorry, I was startled.

#1 Beanie's Customer: Richie, Ruth, did either of you hear that??

#1 Beanie's Customer: God this school is like a maze I have no idea where I’m going.

SleazySpankoffski: hear what??

SleazySpankoffski: i swear to god if you get murdered…

#1 Beanie's Customer: I’m not getting murdered.

#1 Beanie's Customer: I hope… it did sound suspiciously like a scream.

SleazySpankoffski: liKE A SCREAM???

SleazySpankoffski: in any ither circumstanbe i would be laughing at you, ya noodle

SleazySpankoffski: if petes dead imma lose it

#1 Beanie's Customer: Calm down Ted I’m sure everything’s fine.

#1 Beanie's Customer: Richie? Ruth??

ruthespian: THIS BITCH

#1 Beanie's Customer: Excuse me?

ruthespian: omgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomg

ruthespian: what the hell

ruthespian: i cannot believe this motherfucker

#1 Beanie's Customer: Ruth, what’s going on?

#1 Beanie's Customer: What was the yell?

ruthespian: oh fuck yeah wait

ruthespian: dyou want the good new or the bad news first

SleazySpankoffski: theres bad news?

ruthespian: idk actually im still too shocked

ruthespian: k good news is we found pete

SleazySpankoffski: thank god

#1 Beanie's Customer: Is he alright?

SleazySpankoffski: ……………..yea what about hte bad news

ruthespian: oh hes more than just alright 😏

ruthespian: richie & i walked in on him waiting in the english classroom with stephanie lauter

#1 Beanie's Customer: Who’s that?

SleazySpankoffski: the mayors dauhgter?

#1 Beanie's Customer: Oh, right, I think I’ve heard you guys mention her before. She seems nice.

ruthespian: damn this gossip is not having the intended effect on you two geezers

SleazySpankoffski: who are yuo callinga geeezer

Grace 🙏: Wait, Peter and Steph were at school together this whole time?

ruthespian: bingo

Grace 🙏: This is completely unacceptable.

ruthespian: idk abt that but sure

ruthespian: wait wait wait hang on

ruthespian added hot_chocolate_boy and flannel-is-the-new-pink to “scooby doo motherfuckers”

ruthespian: muahaha more chaos

ruthespian: pete nows the part where you say “and i would have gotten away with it too if it werent for you meddlesome hooligans”

flannel-is-the-new-pink: petes phone is still dead

flannel-is-the-new-pink: and we only brought 1 charger

ruthespian: let me guess, he let you use it first bc hes a gentleman?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: yeah actually

ruthespian: fuckin called it

#1 Beanie's Customer: Okay, so Peter is 100% good?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Yep!! \(⁀ᗢ⁀)/

#1 Beanie's Customer: Great.

#1 Beanie's Customer: If you guys don’t need anything else, I’ll head to work.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: We should be fine!!

ruthespian: yep thanks for the ride

#1 Beanie's Customer: No problem, I’m just glad everything’s fine.

SleazySpankoffski: wait so you guy s are with pete right now

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Yeah

flannel-is-the-new-pink: how many ppl are in this gc??

ruthespian: no one of any importance

SleazySpankoffski: HYE

ruthespian: whoops sorry my bad. richies uncle is in here

SleazySpankoffski: OYU SUKC

ruthespian: wow if i could actually read that it would be very intimidating

flannel-is-the-new-pink: so who r u?

SleazySpankoffski: IM PETES BROTHR

flannel-is-the-new-pink: ohhhh that explains a lot

SleazySpankoffski: can you tel him ot call me

flannel-is-the-new-pink: his phones charging rn.

flannel-is-the-new-pink: i wouldve charged it @ my house but the power was out last night bc of the storm

flannel-is-the-new-pink: + the wifi too 😭😭

ruthespian: erm what was pete doing at ur house 🤨

flannel-is-the-new-pink: dont get any ideas nerd

flannel-is-the-new-pink: i saw him walking home last night in a fucking blizzard, ofc i let him inside

flannel-is-the-new-pink: but ill tell him 2 call u as soon as he can

SleazySpankoffski: thanksn,

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: OK this was actually a lot more anticlimactic than I thought it would be

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Like, usually, the anime protagonist is kidnapped or murdered or something

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: (Obviously I am GLAD that Peter wasnt MURDERED but YKNOW…)

ruthespian: tHe aNiMe PRoTagOniSt ☝️🤓

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Ruth we are literally in the same room

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: You could insult me to my face if you really must insult me

ruthespian: yeah but i cant do emojis irl

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Why do I put up with you

ruthespian: im ur best friend

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: What about Pete?

ruthespian: petes a bitch

flannel-is-the-new-pink: im telling him u said that >:)

ruthespian: fuck

ruthespian: omg hes gonna kick my ass for the second time in 48 hours

ruthespian: plzzzz dont tell him

flannel-is-the-new-pink: k. what r u willing 2 give me

ruthespian: OMG IM BEING BLACKMAILED

ruthespian: RICHIE I TAKE IT ALL BAKC HELP PLEASEEEE

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Hm

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Pete keeps asking why we’re all frantically texting on our phones and the excuse that I’m texting my uncle really will not hold for much longer

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Whatever shall I tell him…

ruthespian: richie i stg

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: “Oh, nothing, bro. Just that Ruth said something really interesting…”

ruthespian: im begging

flannel-is-the-new-pink: i like this nerd

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Which nerd?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: uh you dumbass

flannel-is-the-new-pink: lmaoooo he dropped his phone like an idiot

flannel-is-the-new-pink: compliment taken back that was really pathetic

ruthespian: no take backsies

ruthespian: would you also consider pete cool ;););)

flannel-is-the-new-pink: i meant what i said before geek. ill kick ur ass

ruthespian: ok ok shutting up now

flannel-is-the-new-pink sent a message to “💞💫THE GIRLIES💫💞” at 8:31 am

flannel-is-the-new-pink: srry i didnt text back

flannel-is-the-new-pink: was awake but didnt have power @ my house + my phone was dead

ladystacy: no worries steph!!

bubblegumpopular: ack a whole night without ur phone??

flannel-is-the-new-pink: it actually didnt suck as much as it might have

flannel-is-the-new-pink: i may have had some unexpected company

ladystacy: SPILL???

bubblegumpopular: omg whooo

flannel-is-the-new-pink: swear not 2 tell anyone

bubblegumpopular: we swear!!

flannel-is-the-new-pink: stacy?

ladystacy: everyone?

ladystacy: not even kyle??

flannel-is-the-new-pink: not even kyle.

flannel-is-the-new-pink: ik hes cute but this is a promise between the girls

ladystacy: alright i promise

flannel-is-the-new-pink: it was peter spankoffski

bubblegumpopular: who?

ladystacy: is that the weird rich dork w the suspenders??

bubblegumpopular: wait wait micro peter???

flannel-is-the-new-pink: well yeah but hes not like that

ladystacy: 🤔🤔 y were u hanging out w someone like him?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: first of all hes not rich

flannel-is-the-new-pink: and it was a coincidence we just ran into each other

ladystacy: @ ur house? unlikely

flannel-is-the-new-pink: it was the middle of a blizzard! how many people do i have to explain this 2 omg

flannel-is-the-new-pink: i just didnt want some random kid to freeze 2 death. and then once he was inside we just hung out?? idk it was a lot more fun than i thought esp since we didnt have our phones once the power/wifi went out

flannel-is-the-new-pink: whatever i doubt its going 2 become anything

flannel-is-the-new-pink: we’re hanging out w his weird friends now

bubblegumpopular: braces girl? 😬

ladystacy: + naruto boy? 🫥

bubblegumpopular: sounds awful

flannel-is-the-new-pink: its whatever

flannel-is-the-new-pink: ruth is kind of funny actually

flannel-is-the-new-pink: when shes not being super gross that is

flannel-is-the-new-pink: idk why we always call her a prude shes the exact opposite

bubblegumpopular: if u say so!!

ladystacy: yeah if ur cool im cool maybe she can hang out w us sometime

bubblegumpopular: so r u guys at school then?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: 👍

flannel-is-the-new-pink: cya here b4 school starts?

ladystacy: ofc!

bubblegumpopular: cat l8r girl 😘

ladystacy: 😘😘

flannel-is-the-new-pink: 🩷🩷🩷

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to “scooby doo motherfuckers” at 8:52 am

hot_chocolate_boy: thank fuck my phone is charged again!

hot_chocolate_boy: sorry about the scare everyone.

hot_chocolate_boy: i’ll call you now, ted.

ruthespian: hes back!!!! (chronically online i mean)

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: YAY WELCOME BACK!

flannel-is-the-new-pink: yall are soooo antisocial omg get off ur phones

ruthespian: fine we r coming 🖕

hot_chocolate_boy: i’ll join the rest of you in a second, i’m just going to the other room to call my brother.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Alright! o(*^▽^*)┛

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Remember we have homeroom in about 30 minutes!

hot_chocolate_boy: shouldn’t take that long, but i’ll text if it does.

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to SleazySpankoffski at 9:14 am

hot_chocolate_boy: sorry again for not telling you.

SleazySpankoffski: yeah well yknow ijust want you to be okau

hot_chocolate_boy: thanks, ted.

hot_chocolate_boy: how was your night with charlotte?

SleazySpankoffski: goodd

SleazySpankoffski: bad idea thouhg since i missed you last nigth

hot_chocolate_boy: true haha.

SleazySpankoffski: gotta get ot work now

SleazySpankoffski: ill pick you uP frm school

hot_chocolate_boy: sounds good.

SleazySpankoffski: love ya kiddo

Chapter Text

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to flannel-is-the-new-pink at 9:36 am

hot_chocolate_boy: oops i still have your charger.

flannel-is-the-new-pink: wow texting in class pete??

hot_chocolate_boy: um. yeah well i wanted to text you.

hot_chocolate_boy: not in a weird way!

flannel-is-the-new-pink: relax man

flannel-is-the-new-pink: ill pick it up at lunch?

hot_chocolate_boy: sounds good!!

flannel-is-the-new-pink sent a message to hot_chocolate_boy at 12:42 pm

flannel-is-the-new-pink: hey weird question

hot_chocolate_boy: ask away.

flannel-is-the-new-pink: did you tell anyone about coming over to my house?

hot_chocolate_boy: nobody except ruth and richie. and i didnt even tell them, really, since they found us.

hot_chocolate_boy: why?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: my friends asked about u when i got back to my table. and they were acting really suspicious when they watched me go over to ur table to get the charger?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: actually the exact words they used were: is it true u spent the night w me

flannel-is-the-new-pink: idk how they would have known

flannel-is-the-new-pink: i mean i told stacy + brenda but they swear they didnt say anything

hot_chocolate_boy: weird. nobody else knew, right?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: i dont think so

hot_chocolate_boy: ruth and richie say they didn’t tell a soul.

flannel-is-the-new-pink: who tf could it have been?

hot_chocolate_boy: wait, shit.

hot_chocolate_boy: richie just reminded me grace was in that group chat.

hot_chocolate_boy: you don’t think..?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: who would she even tell

hot_chocolate_boy: let me text her.

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to Grace 🙏 at 12:47 pm

hot_chocolate_boy: hey grace!

hot_chocolate_boy: sorry for the whole mix up this morning, we’ll find some time to work on our project, and i’ll make it up to you.

Grace 🙏: That’s perfectly okay, Peter. Forgiveness is a good virtue. However, in the future, please text me if any plans change. It’s a bad habit to let your phone battery run out.

hot_chocolate_boy: right, my bad.

hot_chocolate_boy: do you mind if i ask you something?

Grace 🙏: Not at all.

hot_chocolate_boy: did you happen to mention to anyone that i was over at steph’s house last night?

Grace 🙏: Oh, that? Well, yes, I absolutely mentioned it to my group chat of friends from church. I was using it as an example of some of the things teenagers do even when they know God would look down on them for it. I hope you understand.

hot_chocolate_boy: huh.

hot_chocolate_boy: does anyone from that group chat go to hatchetfield high?

hot_chocolate_boy: or maybe happen to be friends with steph?

Grace 🙏: As a matter of fact, Jason is in the group chat. He’s friends with Stephanie, right? I always see him hanging out with her cheerleader friends, because he’s on the football team. I was surprised when I learned he goes to my church. That is, only for Christmas and Easter, but I’m trying my best to convince him otherwise.

hot_chocolate_boy: i would not have expected you to have jason’s number.

hot_chocolate_boy: *i* dont have jason’s number.

hot_chocolate_boy: okay thanks for telling me grace.

Grace 🙏: Again, no problem.

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to flannel-is-the-new-pink at 12:49 pm

hot_chocolate_boy: so it was grace after all.

hot_chocolate_boy: apparently she knows jason through church?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: well damn

flannel-is-the-new-pink: what should we do?

hot_chocolate_boy: what the fuck.

hot_chocolate_boy: some random guy just came up to me asking about last night.

flannel-is-the-new-pink: that sucks 😔

hot_chocolate_boy: there’s another person coming? sorry, steph, but i’m getting out of here.

hot_chocolate_boy: i’m gonna take refuge in the library. we can meet up and talk after class?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: sounds good

ruthespian sent a message to “Nerdy Nighthawks 🤓🦅” at 12:54 pm

ruthespian: wowwww pete ur a little bitch

hot_chocolate_boy: shut the fuck up, ruth. you would have done the same thing.

ruthespian: running away like a little bitch from all those jocks >:)

hot_chocolate_boy: what did you think i was going to do? fight them?

hot_chocolate_boy: besides, i didn’t *run,* i walked away like a normal person.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: You guys cant stop fighting for TWO MINUTES???

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: o(≧口≦)o

hot_chocolate_boy: look, i never start these arguments, if you want to blame somebody blame ruth.

ruthespian: rude!!!!

hot_chocolate_boy: honestly, why do i even put up with you.

ruthespian: u guys ask me that like every single day

ruthespian: besides who else r u going 2 talk 2???

ruthespian: damn 1 night w/ stephanie lauter and now he thinks hes the king of socialism

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: LMAO

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: I think you mean “socializing” Ruth

ruthespian: fuck

hot_chocolate_boy: ruth, do you even know what socialism is?

ruthespian: my point still stands dickhead

ruthespian: just bcuz u and steph hung out 1 time doesnt mean she wants to hang out w u again

ruthespian: when she turns u down youll come crawling back 2 us

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: IF she turns you down!!! I believe in you Peter (*^_^*)

hot_chocolate_boy: thanks, richie.

ruthespian: yeah yeah yall are rlly sappy whatever

ruthespian: just dont come crying to ME when it doesnt turn out well

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ at 12:59 pm

hot_chocolate_boy: hey, richie, are you still with ruth?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Yep! Why?

hot_chocolate_boy: any chance you can stop her from doing that thing where she looks over your shoulder at every inch of your screen for a second? i have to tell you something.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Anything for you Pete!

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: I just told her there are a bunch of senior guys coming back sweaty from PE

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: She took off SO FAST

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Sometimes I wonder if we should be worried about her

hot_chocolate_boy: honestly? me too.

hot_chocolate_boy: but thanks, richie.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: So whats up??

hot_chocolate_boy: so… remember when ruth was joking that i wanted to keep hanging out with steph?

hot_chocolate_boy: she wasn’t wrong.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Damn

hot_chocolate_boy: but she’s also right that steph probably doesn’t want to hang out with me again.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: You never know

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: She seemed pretty happy hanging with you before school started

hot_chocolate_boy: you really think so?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Positive! o(〃＾▽＾〃)o

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: And not just this morning either! No girl who is disinterested would walk all the way across the cafeteria to get a charger from you.

hot_chocolate_boy: so what should i do?

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Maybe a big gesture? Something that makes you seem super cool and desirable? Thats what always works in anime.

hot_chocolate_boy: this is real life, richie.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: OK so what?

hot_chocolate_boy: listen, i love the support, but the advice is lacking.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: ＞︿＜

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: I dont see anyone else you can ask

hot_chocolate_boy: oh fuck me.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: What??

hot_chocolate_boy: do you think… do you think i should ask my brother?

hot_chocolate_boy: even thinking about that is horribly embarrassing.

hot_chocolate_boy: but i might have to.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Listen Pete

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Youve been given a once in a lifetime opportunity

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Destiny knocks but once and yours is STEPHANIE LAUTER you lucky son of a bitch

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: So bite the fucking bullet and talk to your creepy brother!!!!

hot_chocolate_boy: you’re right. i can do this.

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to SleazySpankoffaki at 1:09 pm

hot_chocolate_boy: listen i know you’re at work right now, probably, but if you get a minute i need your advice.

hot_chocolate_boy: wow i never thought i would say that.

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ at 1:10 pm

hot_chocolate_boy: oh my god i *cannot* do this.

hot_chocolate_boy: i texted him. he’s not responding. is it too late to delete all of my messages??

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: QUIT FUCKING TEXTNG ME DURGN CLASS

hot_chocolate_boy: sorry, sorry. i’ll shut up now.

SleazySpankoffski sent a message to hot_chocolate_boy at 1:34 pm

SleazySpankoffski: hye peter

SleazySpankoffski: whats uP?

hot_chocolate_boy: hi.

hot_chocolate_boy: okay, this is going to be really awkward, but i’m just going to say it.

hot_chocolate_boy: let’s say, hypothetically, there’s a girl you want to ask out. how would you do it?

SleazySpankoffski: a girL you say???

SleazySpankoffski: is she hot ;);)

hot_chocolate_boy: i’ve never known the meaning of the word regret until this moment.

hot_chocolate_boy: just tell me what to do.

hot_chocolate_boy: as much as i hate it, you do have dates all too often.

SleazySpankoffski: ahhh peter time to show you my womaniizng ways

SleazySpankoffski: all you gotta do is b sexy like em

hot_chocolate_boy: how… how do i do that?

SleazySpankoffski: use your natural spankpffski charm

hot_chocolate_boy: ted, be serious.

hot_chocolate_boy: somehow i’ve managed not to make a fool of myself in front of her yet.

hot_chocolate_boy: but sooner or later she’s going to figure out the kind of dumbass i am.

SleazySpankoffski: ok pete

SleazySpankoffski: the real trikc to woemen

SleazySpankoffski: is to be confident

SleazySpankoffski: maybe you can find osme way to hide your panic while stil seeming cool/

hot_chocolate_boy: i don’t “seem cool” though.

hot_chocolate_boy: i’m about as cool as i think i am.

SleazySpankoffski: lsiten pete

SleazySpankoffski: oyure a spankoffski. if you believe youre cool then youre cool. and i believe somewhere deep down inside of you you are a cool guy. very very very deep down

hot_chocolate_boy: thanks, ted.

hot_chocolate_boy: alright here goes nothing.

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to flannel-is-the-new-pink at 1:48 pm

hot_chocolate_boy: hey, so, about meeting up after class.

hot_chocolate_boy: do you want to get dinner somewhere?

hot_chocolate_boy: it’s totally okay if you don’t want to.

flannel-is-the-new-pink: wow first hes texting in class next hes asking the girl out?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: uh this is a date right

hot_chocolate_boy: i was kind of thinking it would be.

hot_chocolate_boy: but only if you want to!

flannel-is-the-new-pink: sounds good 🥰

hot_chocolate_boy: really?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: haha yeah

flannel-is-the-new-pink: do u know the italian restaurant on 1st street?

hot_chocolate_boy: yeah! i love their breadsticks.

flannel-is-the-new-pink: we can walk there after school ig

hot_chocolate_boy: perfect!

flannel-is-the-new-pink: oh btw pete?

hot_chocolate_boy: yeah?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: uh i was just thinking

flannel-is-the-new-pink: its ok if grace told every1 abt u and me

hot_chocolate_boy: are you sure?

flannel-is-the-new-pink: yeah. ig what im trying to say is that. i dont mind if people know were together

hot_chocolate_boy: oh. cool.

flannel-is-the-new-pink: cool :)

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to SleazySpankoffski at 2:02 pm

hot_chocolate_boy: good news.

hot_chocolate_boy: you no longer need to pick me up from school today.

SleazySpankoffski: DID SHE SAY IYES

hot_chocolate_boy: yeah!

SleazySpankoffski: TAHTS MY LITLTE BROTHER!!1!

hot_chocolate_boy sent a message to “Nerdy Nighthawks 🤓🦅” at 2:21 pm

hot_chocolate_boy: hhahahhahaa

hot_chocolate_boy: FUCK YOU, RUTH!

hot_chocolate_boy: i’ve got a fucking date with stephanie lauter tonight!!!!!

hot_chocolate_boy: oh my god i’ve got a date with steph. oh my god oh my god.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: YAY PETE

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Ruth come congratulate Pete

ruthespian: no

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Come onnnn

ruthespian: im sulking

hot_chocolate_boy: green with envy, aren’t we, ruth?

ruthespian: 🖕🖕🖕

hot_chocolate_boy: ok actually i’m freaking out a little.

hot_chocolate_boy: i did not expect her to say yes.

hot_chocolate_boy: what am i supposed to do on a date.

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Not a clue!

ruthespian: like id help u

hot_chocolate_boy: fuck

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Oh this is so ridiculous

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Youre going to do great Pete

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Ruth please swallow your pride and reassure your friend that hes gonna do great

ruthespian: 🥱

ruthespian: fiiiine

ruthespian: I Believe In You, Peter Spankoffski! ❤️❤️❤️

hot_chocolate_boy: does it really have to be that sarcastic? all i'm asking for is a little bit of kindness to me, ruth

ruthespian: kindess is for suckers and posers

ruthespian: not cool kids like me B)

hot_chocolate_boy: remember how this morning you didn't know where i was and i could have been dead for all you knew?

hot_chocolate_boy: did it have no impact on you?

ruthespian: yup

ruthespian: i live in the moment peter spankoffski u should know that by now

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Ruth pleaseeeee

ruthespian: you guys are getting on my nerves

ruthespian: whatever. i hope u and ur girl get up to some fun tonight. ill wish you luck as long as you come to school tomorrow and tell me alllll about it

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: Good enough I guess

hot_chocolate_boy: thanks?

hot_chocolate_boy: shit, okay, gotta go meet steph outside the art room soon

hot_chocolate_boy: i don’t know exactly when her social studies class gets out but i don’t wanna be late.

hot_chocolate_boy: wish me luck!

ruthespian: gl!

Richie ( ˘▽˘)っ: GOOD LUCKKKK