Work Text:
Kaede turned around in her bed one more time, closing her eyes tight, and lay still. It was silent. So silent and dark and utterly night-like, she should have been asleep, surely she was asleep, she couldn't be anything but asleep.
Sighing, she concluded that she was indeed awake, as she had been for quite a while now, and opened her eyes again. The clock at her bedside table was blinking in the darkness, its sharp numbers informing her that midnight had come and passed, leaving her in the wee hours of morning utterly awake. Pushing the covers off herself, she sat up at the edge of her bed, getting her slippers on. It would be no use to lie down any longer. She'd already been trying that strategy for hours, and the lack of success was evident.
Kaede did her best to be quiet as she crept to her door, opening it slowly and peeking out into the corridor. Darkness greeted her, not that she had expected anything else. It was so late, it wouldn't have surprised her if she'd been the only one awake in the whole building, not just the apartment. Better keep it that way. Her father would just get worried if he realised she was up this late, and a worried Kotetsu was very near impossible to placate.
Feet hidden deep in her fluffy slippers, she crept toward kitchen. Perhaps a cup of hot tea would help her get to sleep, and even if it didn't, making and drinking the tea would certainly be a better way to spend her time than lie down for another moment and try to count sheep. She was quite sure they'd started to get into imaginary numbers, and she hated counting those.
At the door to the kitchen she stopped, blinking. There was a sliver of light under the door, spilling out to the dark floor of the corridor. As she listened, though, there was no sound of movement from the other side of the door, nothing indicating that she wasn't the only one up except for that little ribbon of light.
Oh, well. Her father had probably gotten himself a glass of water and forgotten to turn off the lights. It certainly would have been quite typical.
Kaede opened the door and stepped in, then halted. Despite the silence, the kitchen was not quite as unoccupied as she had thought. Barnaby was sitting at the table, his hands closed around a mug. As he heard Kaede coming in, he looked up, surprised.
"Uh, hi." Kaede felt somewhat awkward, though she shouldn't have. Of course Barnaby could be in the kitchen. It was his kitchen as much as it was hers, after all, and just because she still wasn't quite used to the idea of the three of them living together wasn't any reason to treat this as anything unusual.
"Good evening, Kaede-chan." Barnaby looked quite different from his usual day-time self. He wasn't wearing his glasses, his hair was enough of a mess that Kaede supposed he had been to bed earlier, and she could even spy a hint of a stubble on his face. "Can't sleep?"
"I guess." She walked across the room to the water kettle. "Any hot water left?"
"I'm afraid I used the last of it." Barnaby gave her an apologetic look. "Any particular reason why you can't?"
"No." Nothing she was eager to discuss, at least. "Just can't settle down, I guess." She took the kettle to the tap and filled it, then set it to heat up again. She was still planning to have her tea, Barnaby or not.
"Mm. I know how that is." Barnaby sipped at his own drink. He seemed quite comfortable, sitting there in the pyjamas that Kotetsu had gotten him for Christmas, hair falling about his shoulders in messy strands. Kaede immediately scolded herself for even thinking of such things. Of course Barnaby seemed comfortable; he had every right to feel so.
"Oh?" Kaede leaned against the counter. "Daddy didn't kick you out of bed, did he?" As soon as she'd said that, she flushed, wishing she hadn't. Sure, she was well aware that there was only one bed in the master bedroom, but it wasn't exactly something that they discussed every day.
"Not quite, though he can sometimes be quite lively in his sleep." Barnaby chuckled, apparently either not noticing or choosing to ignore her embarrassment. "Rather, I decided to get out of bed so I wouldn't wake him up needlessly."
"Why so?" Kaede frowned. "I mean, he sleeps like a log most of the time. I'm sure he wouldn't budge if you read in bed or something."
"It's not quite that simple, I'm afraid." Barnaby still smiled, but it was fainter now. "I haven't been sleeping well, and, well, I honestly don't want Kotetsu to know."
"Why not?" It wasn't any of her business, probably, and she really shouldn't have tried to pry, but since Barnaby was the one who started the discussion, she supposed it was polite enough to go along with it.
"I've been having nightmares." The confession surprised her, calm as it was, Barnaby's eyes now fixed on his drink. "I'd rather he not know."
"Nightmares about what?" Her voice was quiet. She wasn't sure she wanted to hear, but she asked anyway. It made her feel less, well, alone.
"About Kotetsu." Barnaby closed his eyes for a moment, his expression now serious. "About losing him."
"You have nightmares of him dying." She didn't bother to ask this time. "About the time you thought he was dead, right? When he took the blast head on?"
"Mostly, yes." He nodded, opening his eyes to look at her again. "It's different sometimes, though. Some other danger, a new villainous NEXT, or just Kotetsu doing something stupid and getting him into trouble when I'm not there to save him. It doesn't matter how, though. The dreams all make my sleep unpleasant."
"I know." The words slipped out before she could stop them, and Kaede lowered her eyes. She hadn't meant to say that.
There was a brief silence, only broken by the sound of the water slowly starting to boil. Finally, Barnaby spoke. "You're afraid." He didn't bother to ask, either. "You have those same nightmares, of losing him, of seeing him die."
"Uh, kind of." And they were getting more frequent. "I know it's silly, and I know he won't get killed that easily, and I know you're looking after him, too, but... I can't help the dreams." And then she ended up staying awake until past midnight because every time she closed her eyes she saw her father dead before her and then sleep did not seem like such a good idea anymore.
"I'm sorry to hear that." Barnaby shook his head. "I wish I could do something."
"But you do." She clasped her hands together, trying to find the right words. "You keep him safe. I know you do. He's your partner and you won't let him get himself killed."
"Never." Barnaby's voice was quiet but she heard the conviction it quite clearly. "As long as it's within my power, Kotetsu will live."
"I know." That was the one thing she didn't doubt. Not in her mind, at least, not when it was daytime and she was watching the news about another exciting chase, not when she saw someone buying the collectible cards at a store and smiled when they picked the Tiger, not when everything was good and bright and safe. It was only at night that the fears came, when she was supposed to sleep and not worry, and that was when she was left staring at the clock on the nightstand and wishing she had no dreams.
"Kaede." Barnaby's voice broke through her thoughts. "I know you're afraid. I'm afraid, too. I wouldn't have all these nightmares if I wasn't. But even then, I know that they won't become true."
"How can you know that?" she asked, so very quiet. "You know better than anyone how dangerous it is. And he's only getting weaker every time..."
"Because I know Kotetsu." He stood up now, stepping away from the table, hands still cradling his now empty mug. "And you know him, too, even though it's difficult to remember at night. We both know just how stubborn he is, and just how big his heart is, and we know he'll never fail to make it home. And you know why?" He set the mug in the sink, then turned to look at her, and something in his eyes reminded her so very much about her father. "Because he wants to come home to the two of us, and he won't let anything stop him from doing that."
"Right." That much she could at least believe in. Because her father was the strongest, kindest man, NEXT or not, and he would never let his family down.
"So please, Kaede-chan, try not to worry. I know it's difficult right now, but Kotetsu wouldn't want you to be so fearful because of him."
"I know." She lowered her eyes. "I just... I don't want to lose him, too." She'd already lost her mother.
"Neither do I. And that's why I know he'll always come back." There was a hand on her head, warm and familiar as it ruffled her hair a bit, and she could have sworn it was her father. "Try to get some sleep once you've had your tea, Kaede-chan. You know how insufferable he gets when he worries."
She didn't say anything, just nodded a bit, listening to the footsteps as he walked out of the kitchen. The water was boiling now, but it took her a moment to get the kettle.
Perhaps after this, she could indeed sleep.