Work Text:
“He thought you were… awesome.” Grian said, already regretting his decision to give Scar an inch, almost sure he was going to take a mile.
“He?” Scar said, proving Grian right instantly, “So my partner was a guy?”
“That only rules out Cleo and you know it.” Grian said, looking over to where Scar sat, wiggling his eyebrows like he always did to make Grian laugh, “It’s not that big of a hint!”
“It’s a hint!” Scar said triumphantly.
“Do you want me to keep going or not?” Grian warned, watching as Scar sobered up from his victory quickly.
“Yes – yes. Sorry.” Scar wilted, and Grian almost felt bad.
“Okay… well.” Grian thought for a moment. He couldn’t give the game away, but he had to give Scar something he could chew on for a bit before he came back to Grian begging for more clues. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Scar leaning forward in anticipation, a small smirk on his lips, and he thought of something, “He said, there’s nothing like your smile, sort of subtle? And perfect? And real…”
Scar looked smug at the admission for a moment before he leaned in further for more.
“And he said, you never knew how wonderful that smile could make someone feel.” Grian continued.
He slightly hoped that would be enough for Scar. From Scar’s face, it clearly wasn’t.
“And he knew… whenever you got bored you made up rumours that spread like gasoline.” Grian said, thinking back to Scar’s many attempts to cause chaos in their first game, “And he noticed that you only took your shirt off cos’ you knew that he would have to intervene.”
Scar seemed confused at that, not remembering the many times Grian had chased him down and thrown his shirt back over him. It wasn’t only the lack of protection from attacks that Grian had been worried about, but the looming threat of sunburn that followed Scar like a curse. Now, in this game, Scar didn’t know where he’d gotten the large burn scar on his back, nor did he know why Grian had a puncture wound right next to his right eye. But Grian did.
“But he kept it all inside his head. What he saw was left unsaid. And though he wanted to, he couldn’t talk to you. He couldn’t find a way.” Scar looked enamoured by every word by this point and Grian felt compelled to continue, “But he would always say if I could tell him, tell him everything I see. If I could tell him how he means so much to me. But we’re a million worlds apart. And – I don’t know how I would even start. If I could tell him.”
Scar looked in thought for the first time in a while, seriously considering everything that Grian had said, “Did – did he say anything else?”
Grian was startled when Scar did finally speak and stumbled out with, “About you?”
Scar’s eyes widened for a second, taking Grian’s reaction to mean that was all he had to say, “No – no! I mean, you don’t have to tell me, that was more than enough.”
“No, it’s okay – I’m just… he said so many things and I’m just trying to remember the best ones… so.” Grian didn’t know what had come over him, or why he wanted to keep telling Scar things about his partner. About them. He’d been keeping this from Scar for four games, was he really ready to tell him now? He wasn’t.
But as Scar seemed to fill with happiness, delighted that Grian was going to tell him more, he started to doubt himself.
“He thought that you looked really pretty – No! Um…” Grian could smack himself in the face right now, take himself down to his last life and just dive off a cliff from embarrassment, “It looked pretty cool when you had those scarlet streaks in your eyes.”
“He did?” Grian saw Scar’s eyes sparkle with the amber streaks he still had this game. He liked that Scar was surviving in his early lives for longer in more recent games, but sue him for kind of liking Scar’s red life look. Just thinking of him made Grian shudder a little, though some of that was the remnant of the embarrassment from his first attempt at the statement.
“And he wondered how you always could take all the rest of the world by surprise.” Grian said, still baffled that Scar could swindle his way out of everything and take from even the smartest players without them batting an eye. It was so obvious to Grian when Scar was in a swindling kind of mood, but he guessed to those looking in Scar was just too nice to undermine anyone’s trust, “But he kept it all inside his head, all he saw was left unsaid. If I could tell him, tell him everything I see. If I could tell him how he’s everything to me.”
“But we’re a million worlds apart.” Scar said, looking forlorn in a way Grian hadn’t seen in a long time. He was looking off into the middle distance, entranced by something Grian couldn’t see.
“And I don’t know how I would even start, if I could tell him. But what can you do when there’s this great divide?” Grian said. Even back in the first game there were times where he couldn’t get through to Scar. Scar’s amnesia in the subsequent games reminded him of those times.
“He just seems so far away…” Scar said, still looking off wistfully. Grian almost cracked and told him everything, but he managed to hold himself back.
“And what can you do when the distance is too wide?” Grian said instead.
“It’s like I don’t know anything.” Scar said, voice cracking.
And that’s when Grian’s willpower broke, “And how do you say, I love you?”
Scar looked back at Grian with that, and Grian closed his eyes so that it would be easier.
“Because I love you.”
Grian felt the world lift off his shoulders, the first time it had since he’d jumped off of their mountain after the first game had ended.
“I love you.”
And for a small moment he could feel the desert sun beaming down on him.
“I love you.”
And when the sick feeling had settled in his chest, Grian opened his eyes.
“I love -” But Scar wasn’t there anymore, “You?”
Grian moved from where he was sat to see where Scar had been looking. Off in the distance, behind a few trees that had blocked Grian’s initial view, he could see Scar talking to other people, already having moved on to finding answers elsewhere.
“But we’re a… million worlds apart.” Grian whispered to himself, “And, I don’t know how I would even start. If I could tell him.”
Grian thought, and resigned himself back to when he knew Scar would never find out what they were to each other once upon a time. However now, maybe one day, Scar would win a game, and he would remember everything. Grian could only hope that Scar wouldn’t hate him when he did.
“If I could tell…”