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Sakura doesn’t know why or how Nirei and Suo were in his house, what’s more, he doesn’t know how he ended up chomping on a mouthful of curry that Nirei had brought over.
"Is it good?" Nirei asked, his eyes gleaming with enthusiasm as he leaned towards Sakura with an expectant gaze.
Sakura gave a small nod, his mouth full of curry. He savored each spoonful, scooping up pieces of chicken coated in the thick, spice-tinged sauce.
It was good, really good.
The rice and chicken curry had a good balance of savory flavors. The spice wasn't too strong, but it was enough to mask the vegetables. Despite Sakura's dislike for vegetables, he didn't mind them in the curry—the sauce did the job of concealing their taste.
"I'm so glad," Nirei said, exhaling with relief as his smile widened. "I was worried it might taste weird."
Sakura paused, setting his spoon down. "Did you—" He swallowed the remaining food in his mouth. "Make this?"
"We both did," Suo stated, his usual poised smile lifted a bit more than usual. "I'm glad you enjoyed it, Sakura-kun~"
Suo's mocking tone elicited a fierce blush on Sakura's face, his lips curling into a scowl.
“S-shut up!” Sakura huffed, “I-… it’s okay…”
"Oh..." Nirei's disappointed tone made Sakura flinch. He noticed how Nirei's smile dropped. "Is it not good? Did we do something wrong?"
“Urgh… that’s not it,” Sakura grunted, turning his head away from Nirei.
If Sakura kept staring at Nirei's puppy-dog eyes, it would only break his heart further. Sakura was certain Nirei knew exactly what he was doing, but he wouldn't confront him about it, fearing it might make the blonde cry.
“Then, what is it? Is it the vegetables?” Nirei pried, leaning closer. “I know you don’t like them, but it’s a staple in curry, maybe I should’ve substituted it for something else…”
“No…” Sakura muttered, feeling a bit claustrophobic with how close Nirei was leaning towards him. Sakura wasn’t big on physical contact, it was terrifying in a way.
To let someone be this close, to let them in completely, enough to reach inside him and out. It was the fact that’s what Suo and Nirei were doing, unintentionally or not.
Slowly, but surely Sakura’s walls chipped away and no matter how hard he tired to rebuild it, making it stronger than before, those two always ended up cracking it even more.
If they saw Sakura—every piece of him, past and present, would that scare them?
Would they… leave?
Sakura carried too much on his shoulders—a past burdened with violence, blood, and trauma.
It was ugly, it was something that would scare anyone and Sakura knew it would scare them.
A pandora box to be kept close and to never be opened, it caused too much pain, tears, and death.
Sakura shrugged away his morose thoughts, putting all his past memories into a box, forever closing it.
To never open again.
“It’s good, really good...” Sakura grumbled, lowering his head to avoid the brightly lit eyes coming from Nirei.
“Thank goodness, if you like we can make it for you all the time!” Nirei said, making Sakura shot up his head, revealing the crimson red painting his face.
“Huh?!” Sakura shrieked, tumbling back a bit. “W-what? Are you going to live here then?!”
Sakura only meant it as a joke, but the way Nirei and Suo turned to another and gave each other a look that gave Sakura goosebumps.
“Is that an invitation?” Suo gibed, taking a pink bag from behind him back, blue and white paper stuffed in the bag to conceal what’s in it.
“N-No!” As flustered as Sakura was, he couldn’t help but stretch his neck over to view the concealed bag. “W-what’s that?”
“Something Nire-kun and I wanted to give you.” Suo handed the bag to Sakura, who slowly took it, bewildered by the… gift?
A gift? For him?
Sakura pulled the wrappers out the bag to find a picture frame, a picture of all his friends—it was odd to think about, to have.
Sakura had… friends
That was something Sakura still wasn’t used to, yet it was something he held closed to his heart.
The picture was of all of class 1-1 crowded around him, in the back was Tsugeura holding up dumbbells—Kiryuu shooting a dirty look at the boy, Kakiuchi throwing a peace sign, Kurita holding Takanashi in a headlock, Sugishita spotted in the background with his head flat on the desk, while Nirei and Suo stood behind Sakura—Suo with his usual smile and Nirei beaming a shy grin. And Sakura had Anzai’s arm wrapping around his shoulder, pulling him closer to the camera.
Sakura’s eyes widened, recalling back to the reason the photo was even taken. It was back then when the class suddenly wanted to take a group photo due to end of school and summer break approaching. To Sakura’s dismay, he got dragged into it. Looking at the photo now, he now hated it a bit less when all his friends pestered him to do more pictures with them.
He kinda regretted it… he wished he done more if he knew this was the outcome.
“Do you like it?” Nirei asked, hands on his lap, waiting with anticipation.
“Heh,” Sakura snickered, a meager smile cracked on his face. “You could’ve gotten a better picture of me.”
With Anzai’s arm on his shoulder, his face in the picture showed a scarlet red, his body twisted itself as he tried to remove himself. As if a cat that got caught by a net.
“I think that picture represents you the best Sakura-kun,” As teasing as Suo could be, this time Sakura didn’t mind it as much, in fact, he couldn’t help but smile a bit wider at the picture frame.
“Well, we can always take more pictures!” Nirei recommended, taking out his phone and quickly taking a snapshot of the three.
Sakura could barely process what had happened as the flash went off, rubbing his eyes.
“H-hey!” Sakura yelled, glaring at the giddy blonde. “Delete that!”
Nirei shook his head, hiding behind Suo, who stretched out his arm to defend the giggling boy, blocking Sakura from getting any closer.
“This is going to be my new lock screen.” Nirei grinned, quick to work on his phone.
“Think of this as a gift to Nire-kun, since he’s the one who worked so hard on making the curry.” Suo interjected, still using his body as a shield to protect Nirei.
“You worked hard too Suo-san!” Nirei exclaimed, pouting.
“It was your idea, you got the ingredients and worked really hard on it. I was there for support… and to ensure you didn’t burn your house down.” Suo smiled, patting Nirei’s back.
Sakura stopped his attempts to go after Nirei, brows furrowed together in puzzlement.
“Why?” Sakura blurted, clenching his fists. “Why are you doing so much for… me?”
Nirei and Suo both turned to another, then back at Sakura and smiled.
“Because you’re our friend and our captain Sakura-san/kun!” They both simultaneously said, Nirei with his buoyant smile, twinkling syrupy amber eyes and freckles that curved upwards to expand his smile. Suo wore his typical lax grin, yet his cardinal eye burned hotter than fire, a light that couldn’t be extinguished.
Oh…
It felt like a halo surrounded them, a light guiding him out of the darkness, a fire that spread throughout his chest, warmth—no, it was something hotter, scorching his skin, stagnant heat encasing his heart. It made his whole body weak and wobbly. His stomach twisted itself, the air in his lungs temporary as if all this unconditional affection was limited, time sensitive.
It wasn’t, Sakura knew that. Yet, the fear of being abandoned hovered over Sakura like a dark storm cloud.
They gave so much, too much, and that was petrifying.
Why?
The only question, only word that runs around his head whenever Nirei or Suo did anything for him.
Just… why?
Sakura had lost hope of finding people who would accept him, love him, want him… yet when he expected it the least, it all came crashing onto him.
A gigantic wave that engulfed him, he couldn’t even hesitate as it already swallowed him.
It was too much, too fast, too strong and Sakura didn’t know how to handle it.
Yet, as unready as he was for it, he held onto it for dear life, unwilling to let go.
He won’t let go.
—
Sakura still didn’t know how Suo and Nirei got into his house.
He was sure he had a lock, yet it wasn’t enough to keep those two out of his house.
Sakura assumed the first time would be the last, but it only happened more frequently.
Every time Sakura stepped into his house, there they would be, waiting with a plate of food around the small table and the words “Welcome home!” would be the first thing that entered his ears.
At first, it was bizarre and a bit irritating, then it became normal, a habit, a routine that Sakura had fallen into and something he looked forward to.
It became his lifestyle, after every patrol Nirei and Suo would be at his place, eating a meal there and chatting away about the day.
This time was just another mundane night, with endless chattering and a few snorts from Sakura as Nirei explained the reason why the Okonomiyaki was undercooked and was practically falling apart with just a slight breeze.
“I thought I cooked it well enough, but I guess not.” Nirei fretted, puffing out his cheeks.
“It still looks edible, no?” Sakura eyes glued to the Okonomiyaki, even if it didn’t look the greatest, he was hungry and anything that was food, Sakura will eat it.
Being picky wasn’t something Sakura was accustomed to (unless it’s vegetables, that’s different), as long as Sakura had something in his belly, he would be satisfied.
“I think it’s better not to,” Suo lectured, removing the plate away from Sakura.
Nirei sighed, his eyes tainted with sorrow. “I’m sorry everyone…”
“Don’t be, you did your best Nire-kun.” Suo pacified, ruffling Nirei’s hair.
“Uh…” Sakura began, clearing his throat to remove the lump that strained his words. “I-… I can make something for us..”
Nirei and Suo whipped their heads to Sakura, looking at him like a deer in the headlights.
“W-what?” Sakura grunted, frowning at the shock plastered on their faces.
Do they not—
Sakura’s worries died down when he saw how the blonde smiled, his eyes coated with eagerness as his fingers interlocked into a circle, bring it up to his chin.
“Really?” Excitement squeaked out from Nirei, his smile revealing teeth. “That means we’re the first to eat something you made!”
Suo nodded, a sincere smile on his face, unlike what he usually wears. “I’m excited to see what you’ll make Sakura-kun.”
Sakura felt breathless, his eyes staring at the two boys in front of him. Astonished, grateful, and relieved to know that they would want Sakura to do this for them. His classmates, his vice-captains, his friends, the people who… love trust him enough to cook something, make something that demonstrates how much Sakura cares for them.
“Don’t get too excited,” Sakura huffed, flustered by the shining eyes boring at him. “It’s just eggs, nothing special.”
“It’s special because it’s from you Sakura-san!” Nirei was practically on cloud nine, shaking with enthusiasm.
Sakura scoffed, holding back a smile. “Whatever,” he muttered, yet his half-lid eyes were tainted in appreciation.
Sakura made his way to the kitchen and began by cracking two eggs. He wasn’t a bad cook he would think, but he wasn’t necessarily a chef either.
He could make the basics as in sandwiches, soup, and eggs when needed if he couldn’t afford to eat out. Except those are the only things he could make, it wasn’t special or did it taste extraordinary like what Nirei or Kotoha could make; it was simple, easy, and boring.
All Sakura had to do was crack the eggs into a pan (a pan that he received from Kotoha months ago) and add some salt onto it.
That’s all he had to do, but something in him wanted to make it a bit special for his… friends.
He decided to add something else into it, he thrown in a bunch of spices that Umemiya got for him, not exactly knowing what they were, but it smelled good so it should be fine.
It wasn’t fine…
The eggs looked fine, still yellow scrambled eggs and it smelled fantastic.
However, when Suo and Nirei each took a piece the smiles on their face fell, a look of confusion and repugnance flickered onto their faces before a forced smile revealed.
“W-what’s wrong?” Sakura asked, grimacing.
“N-nothing, it’s great!” Nirei immediately began taking more pieces and shoved them in his mouth, an awry look on his face.
“Suo, what’s wrong with it?” Sakura turned over to Suo, who had a grisly expression, his lips pressed together.
“Hmm,” Suo chuckled awkwardly, forcefully swallowing the small piece he took. “It’s a… very unique flavor…”
Sakura quickly stabbed his fork and put the eggs in his mouth. Immediately, his tastebuds went haywire, it was a mix of wrong in those eggs.
It was extremely salty, a garlicky type of spice, and somehow sweet (?). He spat it out, his tongue hanging out his mouth to allow the air to cool his grimed tongue.
“It’s horrible…” Sakura murmured, disappointment washed over him, the food he wanted to make as a way to show his appreciation to them failed.
It only gave them the possibility of having food poisoning instead.
“I liked it!” Nirei defended, still engulfing the eggs until it was completely gone.
Sakura eyes widened, his mouth an ‘O’ shaped. “W-why did you do that..?”
“Because you made it, of course I’ll eat it.” Nirei gave a thumbs up, although he looked like he was about to puke soon. “It was delicious, thank you Sakura-san!”
His heart did a little skip, then another, and another until all Sakura could hear was the pounding of his heart and feel the blush creeping onto his face.
Idiot…
Sakura couldn’t help but chuckle, his eyes softening as he stared at the freckled boy.
“Next time,” Suo spoke, “let’s all cook together, okay?”
While Suo made it seem like a suggestion, it was definitely more of a “please-don’t-cook-without-my-supervision” way of telling Sakura and Nirei to always include him to ensure nothing like this ever happened again.
“You said you’re on a diet, I’m surprised you ate any,” Sakura replied, astonished that Suo would even attempt to even eat his cooking.
Suo simply smiled, tilting his head a bit. “It’s a rare chance to eat something you made Sakura-kun, if I need to halt my diet for just a bit, it’s fine because it’s you.”
There’s that feeling again, rushing up his body, heat enclosing his chest. His skin sizzling, smoldering the inside and outside of his body. It was dizzying, yet the ton of affection delivered to him made Sakura a bit selfish, wanting to hold onto them forever.
Staring back at them both, at the people he holds so dear to his heart, he couldn’t help but want to cry. He wouldn’t, but he truly cared loved them, he loved them…?
Ah, he loved them.
That was something Sakura didn’t think he could do again, however, he’s proven wrong every time when it came to these two.
“Next time, let’s all cook together,” Sakura muttered, his lips twisted to a pout. “It’ll… be fun..”
“Of course, Sakura-san!” Nirei burst with energy, entangling his arm around Sakura who, instead of pushing the blonde away, kept still, his face a vermilion red.
“Let’s do that soon,” Suo replied, a smirk on his face as he watched the blushing Sakura and clingy Nirei.