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I Know I Said Reincarnation Would Be Cool But This Is Ridiculous I’m Literally Going To Die(But At Least I Have Urahara My Beloved) 2.0!!!!

Summary:

WE HAVE RISEN BABY GIRL. LIKE A DOLLAR STORE PHOENIX FROM THE ASHES OF THOSE LEAVES YOU SET ON FIRE WITH A MAGNIFYING GLASS AS A CHILD.
THIS VERSION'S GONNA BE PACKED TO THE GILLS WITH STEAMY, SQUISHY, SQUELCHY STUFF SO NUT UP, BOYS.

Whether that is /pos or /neg is still up for debate

(Title may or may not change )

Chapter 1: What's a Soliliquy? Some kind of spice?

Summary:

Who gave this rando a mic? They're breaking the fourth wall and it's only the prologue.

Notes:

We are back! Thank you to everyone who has given me encouragement and patiently waited for this rewrite! A lot has happened because life likes to play like I'm a baseball and it is an NBA player hitting back to back homeruns.

This story has also gone through SO. MANY. DRAFTS AND REWRITES. Everytime I settled on one idea, I started building off another and liking that better. But I think I've finally settled on something I like! There's definitely gonna be a ton of major and minor changes! This includes more sensitive topics which I will of course put warnings at the beginning of chapters! I hope you guys all enjoy this new version!

Please keep in mind the Slow to Update tag It is very necessary lmao

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

What is life but an elaborate play?

 

Everyone has their own roles, going through the motions each and every day until they breathe their very last breath. 

 

Some tales are more interesting than others, but they’re all so intertwined that it’s hard to pick out one without dragging a few others along the way.

 

But many do not like to hear that their entire lives are a mere play.

 

For that means their choices are not their own. That their illusion of free will is just that—

 

An illusion.

 

No one wants to think about what’s pulling the strings of the marionettes in their play.

 

No one wants to to worry whether the puppeteer

 

Is a benevolent God cloaked in graceful swaths of light that bestows love upon it’s creations

 

Or a wicked God playing with its puppets with the intention to break them.

 

 

Oh, but enough about what silly little humans think about their gripes with higher beings! 

 

I mean, for someone who really wants to deny that gods exist and control fate, they seem more than eager to replicate such behavior with everything in their lives. Their stories, their kids, strangers' bodies, oh the list goes on! Tsk, tsk, tsk, what hypocrites!

 

But speaking of stories, this one is going to be quite the treat!

 

These stories are already so intricately woven with the threads of time and space, so what do you think happens when we forcefully sew a new piece in there?

 

Will fate stay on course like an unchanging river, or will our dear Pookie-Wookie Bear be able to shift this story to something new?

 

Something exciting .

 

Drama! Action! Romance! Horror! Tragedyyyyy!

 

Ooohhhh the options are endless!

 

The anticipation is just killing me~ And I’m sure it will be killing others as well! Ehe he he~

 

Ahem. Any whodle-doodles!

 

It’s time for your big break babes! A nice little story to fulfill all of the wishes and desires you have in that silly little head of yours. That unquenchable thirst for the what ifs~ They can all be yours! 

 

This story is in your hands (by the way it looks like you could use some moisturizer on them, which is why I’m stage whispering to you, how benevolent of me! ) and I’m so so so excited to see what happens. 

 

I’m sure everything will be fine! Surely everything won’t horribly derail due to the poor choices and ineptitude of a poor, pathetic little human trying to defy fate! 

 

Gooooood Luck!




You’ll surely need it.







 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

P.S. Whatever happens next is tooooooootally your fault, and by reading this entire soliloquy you have legally agreed to all trauma and fault for all bad things to happen, and that anything good is all because of me. How generous of you!

 

<3

Notes:

"Once upon a time," a phrase
That had once had me filled with rapture
But it doesn't guarantee
A happily ever after
Will you then accept your fate
Or fight it before it's too late
Trying to reclaim what's mine
Regardless of the greater design
Fight fate, or see it through
Who could I be and who are you?
Trying to see what's true
So will you join me in a pas de deux?
So fight fate, or see it through
Is destiny worth clinging to?
All that I want is you
So will you join me in a pas de deux?