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Navia loved the beach.
Clorinde had been dating the powerhouse of the Spina de Rosula for almost three years at that point; if you’re wondering why Clorinde had yet to propose, it’s because she’s a pussy, and if you’re wondering why Navia hasn’t gotten on with it yet, it’s because she’s too endearingly naive to care if they’re dating, engaged, married- all that concerns Navia is that Clorinde loved her, and she love Clorinde.
The Champion Duelist thought this was beautiful. She also thought that Navia deserved so much more than the bare minimum of ‘unconditional love.’ So, on top of dating Navia, Clorinde was secretly managing The List- a top secret list documenting everything about Navia, so the purple haired woman could continue to be the best girlfriend ever.
It was almost scary at this point- what Navia likes, what she doesn’t like, what she’s allergic to (she’s lactose intolerant, but that doesn’t stop her), her favorite drink (strawberry milkshake- see?), her cycle, how she typically felt after coming home from work (in the mood for some cuddles), even what she was like in bed (that information, Clorinde will not be disclosing). The List included almost everything the perfect girlfriend would need to know.
Key word: almost.
What it didn’t include, somehow, was Navia’s favorite animal- hermit crabs.
Navia loved the beach.
She also loved her ‘beach animals-’ from sea urchins and sharks, to sea turtles and seals. If it was a salty wave away, her fascination with it knew no bounds.
Apparently, quite literally. After a long, exhausting day of duels, Clorinde desperately longed to return to some sense of normalcy.
What she found instead was her girlfriend.
In the kitchen.
Cooking gourmet food.
For the not one, not two, but seventeen hermit crabs scuttling around their house.
Clorinde turned, ponytail swinging behind her as she gazed at the crabs. When she entered the door, all of the tiny little hermit heads gazed up at her, beady black eyes round and wide, like they just got caught sneaking a cookie before bed (or Furina getting caught by Neuvillette skipping her therapy sessions to go surfing).
The hermit crabs must have done something to Clorinde’s brain, because instead of demanding an explanation from the apron-wearing blonde in front of her, she fucking waved.
Navia snorted, putting down what looked like flakes of kelp and dried out strings of mango jerky. “Calm down, all of you!” she gushed, rushing over to peck Clorinde on the cheek. Immediately, the crabs relaxed, and continued scuttling around the house like they lived there.
Navia giggled. “Don’t mind them. They’re all sweethearts, really.”
Clorinde raised a hasty finger to the hermit crab that had lingered behind to glare fiercely at her. It looked like even without a visible mouth, somehow, someway, it would bite her.
Navia shrugged. “Oh, ignore Enrique. I fixed his broken limb, and he’s gotten a little bit possessive, y’know?”
Clorinde did not know. And she chose to ignore the fact that a hermit crab had imprinted on her girlfriend by following up with a question- “Babe, you know we can’t keep them all, right?”
Navia’s cheerful demeanor flickered. “I know,” she said glumly. Wow, hermit crabs really were her favorite. The blonde continued, “But we can keep them for now, can’t we?”
Clorinde was at war with herself. Biting her lip, she considered. On one hand, this wasn’t practical in the slightest. On the other hand, seeing them go would break Navia’s heart. On the other hand…
Chlorinde shot dark, fierce eyes and Enrique, who narrowed his own in response before scuttling away bitterly.
The Duelist took a breath. She killed for a living- she couldn’t stoop to the level of a hermit crab. And it would make up for not knowing Navia’s favorite animal, so…
I’m going to regret this.
“Sure,” Clorinde finally blurted out, resulting in Navia throwing her hands around her with a high-pitched squeal of glee. Already not worth it, but already so, so worth it. “We can keep them for a while.”
Navia loved the beach.
And Clorinde, as it turned out, loved hermit crab walkie time.
“That is not a straight line,” she mumbled, and all seventeen of them righted themselves immediately- well, except Enrique, who looked like he wished he had fingers to flip her off with.
They had been taking care of the hermit crabs for a couple months now, Navia cooking for them and reading them stories and basically mothering them into oblivion. Clorinde cleaned up after them and taught them about boundaries and consent, and of course, oversaw them when they needed to let off some steam.
After the first three weeks or so, Clorinde had gotten used to the goofy black eyes gazing up at her, not wanting to rip her heart out, but to be held and caressed (with Enrique, sometimes both). Stupid as it was, at this point, they were almost… family.
One big, weird, partially crustacean family.
Two of the hermit crabs chased each other across the sand, kicking it up in pale flurries that Navia coughed into before turning away, pulling Clorinde towards the shallow water, ankles shuffling in the salt blue as they looked on at the hermit crabs. Navia held her girlfriend’s hand as if on instinct. Enrique, looking rather enraged at this development as if he could feel the butterflies in Clorinde’s stomach, responded by scuttling up to Navia, the water quickly coming up to almost submerge him.
On instinct, the Duelist scooped up the hermit crab, who wiggled his little arms around, flailing. “Hey now,” the purple haired woman scorned gently. “Be careful! You’ve never been in such deep water before.”
Enrique looked up at Clorinde, either no or all too many thoughts behind those onyx eyes. Navia tilted her head, features sparkling curiously in the sunlight. “He’ll be okay in the water, babe,” she insisted.
Her girlfriend shrugged, looking away. “I know,” she began. “I just… want to protect him, y’know?” With the words, the hermit crab snuggled into her touch, leaving Navia blinking, dumbfounded. Then, she began to laugh.
After a fit of wheezing laughter, Navia wiped tears from her eyes. “I’ve had you two’s relationship all wrong,” she confessed, still breathless.
Clorinde tilted her head. “What…?”
Navia pressed a peck to her lips. Enrique barely stirred, buzzing contentedly.
“Despite you two’s hard shells, on the inside, you’re actually quite soft,” Navia explained, then gesturing to the other hermit crabs. “All of you. That’s why I love them so much.” Another kiss graced the tip of Clorinde’s pale nose. “And that’s why I love you.”
A hermit glare met with a giggle. “And Enrique, of course.”
So, yeah, in the end, they kept the hermit crabs.