Chapter Text
Once the debris had settled and the dust-cloud polluting the air in the small space had almost parted, it took the Master about half a minute to regain his balance and posture since he'd managed to hit his head in the fall and he groaned loudly, rubbing the area that was pulsating with pain. He looked around himself and it took him ten seconds to register they were on what looked like an abandoned floor in the creaky building where the Doctor had insisted that they'd go because that stupid TARDIS had given off her famous distress-signal, regarding no other place than… Earth, of course.
And it had led them there, to a building in the middle of nowhere nearly collapsing under its own weight which had the Masters own distress-radar give off its warning but before he'd managed to even voice it outloud, the Doctor had already entered the building, forcing the blond to follow.
How unusual.
He dusted himself off with a grimaze and it took him seven seconds to clear off the dirt as much as he could before turning to the far corner where the Doctor had landed, about six seconds for the commotion to still and the dust to part completely for him to be able to fully see the other and then..
It took him exactly four seconds to register the broken off, wooden floor-plank sticking out through the Doctor's lower abdomen like a sword-prop from a bad play.
Four seconds ticking away in sync with the beating of the drums.
He was at the other man's side as fast as if he'd teleported there.
The Master felt something inside of him split in two at the sight and the scream that ripped through his lungs schorsed harshly in his throat, fading into a gasp at the tip of his tongue along with the tearing sensation of rising disbelief and utter, complete shock as he cradled the Doctor's body, trying to apply pressure to the area where he'd been impaled.
Blood. It was everywhere and he almost wanted to laugh at the absurdity of the scene, delirious as it felt like he was moving through the liquid space of dreamlike surrealism… For this surely looked off to him; There the Doctor was lying on the floor with blood pounding out from the mortal wound with lazy spurts, coloring his own fingers in crimson and the only coherent thought the Master could form, was to get them both back to the TARDIS.
That and exterminate the still very real threat in the shape of one last standing sontaran, currently aiming at the two Time Lords from above the hole in the wooden floor they'd fallen through during the fight and the Master snarled with insidious intent;
“You come near him and I'll slice you into little pieces, head to toe…” He practically ripped the screwdriver from the Doctor's pocket and with one swift motion he had turned with weapon in hand, standing as a shield in front of him and aiming it furiously at their mutual enemy.
He must have looked absolutely vicious like a rabid animal ready to pounce on its prey, his voice shaking with unkempt fury and yet his aim was steady like steel and pointing straight at the threat from above..;
“This one is laser.” He spat, hatred dripping from his tone in every mouthed syllable; “He keeps saying it's a sonic but I took the liberty to add a few functions when he wasn't looking. Care to find out if I'm bluffing or not? I could slice off your arm with one press before you've even adjusted your aim you ugly, ugly thing.”
The sontaran seemed to hesitate then, lowering its weapon. The Master stared at it, flaring his energetic signature in a fashion that indicated how serious he was and that he was not playing games. The beats of his hearts were so loud and fast he swore his eardrums would pop any minute and he could feel every single second pouring from the hour-glass that was the Doctor's time.
Time…
He didn't give the sontaran anymore of it and finished it on the spot before crouching down to level with the other Time Lord on the floor;
“Did you see that, Doctor? Doctor..?”
The Doctor's eyes began rolling up in his skull and it was clear he was losing consciousness but the Master would have none of it;
“Hey hey… Doctor, look at me. Over here, idiot! Don't you dare. Stay now, alright..”
“Master.. There's blood on your face.” His voice came out barely audible and the fact he wasn't granted a scolding followed by a lecture about morals regarding the killing of that sontaran, just proved how dire the situation truly was.
For him to be able to talk at all with that thing poking out from him was a miracle in and of itself the blond thought absentmindedly in a haze and then forced himself to remain focused, fighting hard against the trembling that had begun in his bones, to enter his voice. He somehow succeeded..;
“Well, obviously.. It's yours, by the way.” His deep baritone was making itself known in the now quiet place, the aftermath of a battleground brutally revealing the ripped open scars in the most exposed kind of way.. The Doctor smiled weakly, eyes half-closed and his voice wheezing.;
“How fitting..”
“Yeah, I know-wait... Fitting for what? You're not dying, doofus. Just regenerate already.”
“Master.”
“..Doctor.”
Oh no you don't..
The Master knew that look well by now and he swallowed the lump he didn't realize had been there. All this time he'd lost count on how many times he'd seen it caressing the Doctor's features, not unlike his own hand as a stern yet fond command, a silent attempt at wiping it off his face. Because all this time he knew.
However, he didn't want to know. The Doctors weakened voice broke through his temporary, panicked mind-roam and he snapped his eyes back at the trembling man in his arms;
“I think it's tim..-
“No. I said regenerate.”
“Master..”
“Regenerate, Doctor.”
“Master, just list..-;
“Stop saying my name..”
“Really? Huh.. Thought you liked that.”
“Not like this I don't, you bloody pompous nitwit..” He grumbled while instinctively tightening his hold around the other man's torso, holding him up as if it would keep him from disappearing again with the realization dawning on him that it was too late. Far too late..
The Doctor was already slipping away. He had been slipping away for a while.;
“Hmh.. That's new.”
“What are you even doing, huh? You can't just die.” He said pointlessly, feeling the helplessness creeping into his features along with his always reliable anger, an anchor he could grasp hold of whenever he felt like he was fumbling, merely grasping for straws. Which was always when the Doctor was involved.
This didn't feel like fumbling, though. This felt like being burned and freezed at the very same time...
Regardless he pressed on with the growing desperation seeping into his voice with every sharp inhale and exhale through gritted teeth; “You're the Doctor and he doesn't quit that easily, remember? He doesn't quit, period.”
His breath was hot against the Doctor's smooth skin, like the artron pushing from his veins, searingly persistent right on the verge of forcing him into the regeneration-state and yet he was still fighting it ferociously. Just like the Master himself had done on the Valiant. Without a thought, he let his thumb brush off the sweat beginning to form on the dying man's temple only then to linger there, his hand supporting as an anchor of its own;
“I'm afraid that's about to change.”
“Is it? Well I've got news for you, dear. I won't allow that. If I wasn't clear before, let me be very clear now; regenerate.”
“You control a lot of things, Master. This is not one of them.”
The ice cold grip of dread now rose from the depth of his soul to tightly ensnare his airways, leaving him perfectly paralyzed. It was funny how little he suddenly cared about his voice cracking, baring his concealed emotions for the Doctor to grasp for and to hold in a cradle, reflecting the way he was holding him. He kept speaking though as if to grab hold of something, if not tangible and his voice was definitively shaking now;
“So what is this, then? You refuse to regenerate like I did back then just to get back at me, is that it?” He managed through a hushed, wet whisper.
Playing their game to the very end.. However this was a game the Master wasn't willing to play.;
“No.” The Doctor answered, a strangled little noise and the Master flinched but tried to remain calm for the sake of his counterpart, offering some amount of comfort.. Whatever he had the ability to give in this frail moment, he would;
“No?”
“Not everything is about you.”
“You utter piece of.. You want to die, don't you? You want to.. Okay, care to explain then if you would be oh so kind because I'm afraid I don't understand this… You never wanted to die before. Always, always you slithered back up like a stupid bug and I could never be free of you. All those years and now you're telling me it's what you want. You.. What changed?”
“Some things.”
“You can't just.. No.”
“Master..”
“No. And stop saying my name, you're not allowed to say it anymore, is that clear?”
“I'm sorry..”
“No. You're definitely not allowed to say that either.. Just don't, I don't need to hear it ever again.”
“I don't know what to say then.”
“Good, that's really good. Don't say anything at all in fact, just.. Don't.”
“That's okay. I don't really have the strength to talk, it seems…”
“Not like this, Doctor.”
“It was going to happen eventually. I always thought Time Lords live too long, anyway. I even told Wilfred that back then. I'll miss him. Good, old Wilfred.”
“Not like this, it's not fair.”
“No.. I guess it's not.”
“You don't understand. I don't know how to.. Do this. If you're not here then-with you gone, what am I supposed to do?”
“You'll figure it out. You always do.”
“Don't you see? It's been too long, Doctor. It's been too, bloody long.. I’m blind, the drums… The drums make me hear because they are all I ever hear and your stupid face is what makes me see. Gave me a sense of direction and purpose. It's all I have, it's all I am and now you're taking it away from me. You were always selfish, but this? This is cold even for you.”
“Not everything is about you, Master.”
“Stop repeating yourself and stop saying my name. Now listen to me just once, damn it.. No, it's not about me as if I didn't know that already. By Rassilon's dick, you don't have to remind me about it.. It was never about me in the first place, because…
..it was you. Always you, Doctor.
Where did we go wrong?
When you left. Or before that even, or after.. I don't know. I don't know anymore. Doesn't matter now.
I came back.
It was too late then.
I know. I've tried to be fast, after that. Be everywhere at the same time, catch every opportunity. Because I couldn't catch the one thing that mattered.
..you are downright the absolute worst.
I was too late.
I've already said that.
..and I'm sorry.
I hate you.
Well.. I don't know what else to say.
You don't get it, Doctor..You don't have to explain yourself. Don't have to speak, not even like this. I don't want to hear it so can you just for ONCE, shut up.
The Doctor didn't. And the Master, despite feeling like he had two weights attached to his ankles dragging him down to the farthest depth of the sea-bottom, felt relieved. Maintaining some level of normalcy, all the way to the end..
He buried his lips in the other man's chaotic hair so that the Doctor's face came to rest in the crook of the Master's neck, holding on even tighter. He hadn't thought that to be possible, as if he could crawl inside the skin of the other and fade away with him like it was always supposed to be...
For what it's worth. This feels nice. And it would have been enough.
Not enough, no. Never.. How could it be enough? How could it ever be enough when we never even got a chance in the first place?
Tears began tracing down the Doctor's face then and he lifted his hand with great effort, placing it on the Master's cheek. Only then he realized, when the other stroked his thumb under his eye and caressed the delicate skin there, that he too was crying…
I'm not asking you to go with me. Not this time.
And yet you know damn well that I'm still going to.
No. You have to live for yourself now.
I never knew how, nor did I ever want to. Thought you knew me by now. I'm almost disappointed in you, love.
I’m getting cold.
Because you won't regenerate, you airhead..
..Koschei.
So he went there. It made the Master realize this truly was it. After all this time, the Doctor had finally stopped running. Even though he had always found it to be an irritating quality, he'd deep down never wanted the Doctor to stop because stopping would mean he wouldn't continue again.. And he knew that. It would be a lie to say that wasn't one of the many reasons he kept chasing the other man, kept provoking, kept pushing harder and harder… So the Doctor would continue.
He'd hoped for the life of him it wouldn't have to come to this and now all of a sudden it had and he didn't want to acknowledge nor accept it.
The Master was at a loss…
I won't beg, Doctor.
I know. You wouldn't be you if you did. And I wouldn't want you in any other way.
..let me save you. Just this once. Let me show you what I could never tell you outright.
You're the one who doesn't get it. You don't have to anymore.
What?
Save me. You already did. This. This was all I ever wanted. Us standing together. Like we said . Even though it was just for a short time. This was enough. For me it was.
“..shut up, Theta.”
But there was no more response after that.
And The Master screamed his throat raw...
You win, Doctor.