Chapter Text
“Agatha, why don’t you show us your battle scars?”
She froze.
Agatha knew Jen didn’t mean it that way, but her mind immediately jumped to the neat lines that littered her arms. Trying to play for time to think about a scar that wouldn’t expose her poor coping mechanisms and attempting to divert attention away from the way she quickly wrapped her hands over the cuffs of her shirt as if to make sure they hadn’t accidentally rolled up, she hummed slightly, tilting her head as if in deep thought.
After a moment, Agatha took her leg and lifted it into her lap. She slightly pushed up her pant leg to show a pale jagged scar circling her ankle.
“France, 1836. I ran from a group of witch hunters when I stepped into a bear trap they had hidden in the leaves. Safe to say, I felt a little more sympathy for our fuzzy friends after that.”
Everyone laughed, and even Agatha let out a chuckle before stopping as she saw how Rio was looking at her. Her breath stopped as their eyes met. In them, there was uncharacteristic worry. The kind she hadn’t seen in years. Rio pointedly looked at Agatha's hand, still wrapped around her sleeve, and Agatha knew that Rio remembered.
She remembered the nights that Agatha wanted to forget. Remembered how she had cried, asking Rio to just take her, wanting everything to stop. Memories flooded her mind. The guilt, the pain, the way Rio had always held her and stroked her hair until she fell asleep. She also remembered the nights after Rio had left, how she had woken up on the cold bathroom floor, all alone.
Agatha snapped out of her thoughts and turned her head back to the fire. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she took in a deep breath, trying to turn her thoughts to other things. Her heartbeat calmed slightly, and she could no longer hear the blood rushing in her ears.
“I’ve got a scar,” Rio said, abruptly breaking the silence.
“No, you don’t,” Agatha countered quickly, too quickly. She would know, wouldn’t she? She could still remember the countless times they’d spent studying each other's bodies. Sleepless nights full of love and affection, drowning in each other. Every time she simply looked at Rio, she would be reminded.
Lilia's intrigued gaze turned to her before returning to Rio.
“Yes, I do.”
Agatha’s gaze snapped to her. She tensed, dread starting to pile in her stomach. She knew where this was going.
“A long time ago, I loved someone. And I had to do something I did not want to do, even though it was my job. And it hurt them,” Rio drew in a shaky breath and locked eyes with Agatha before continuing, “She is my scar.”
Silence enveloped the clearing. Everyone was staring at the two women who seemed to be conversing with just their eyes. Agatha shifted uncomfortably on the log and looked away before clearing her throat.
“I’m going to go stretch my legs.”
Everyone's eyes followed her, still sitting in silence. Rio let out a huff before starting to get up and follow her. Lilia grabbed her arm just as she was about to leave the clearing. “Don’t think for a second I’ve forgotten what you said in the sound booth.”
Rio scoffed at the badly concealed threat, letting out a hissing-like sound. She left the other witches there and continued after Agatha.
It didn’t take long for Rio to find her.
She was standing with her back to Rio, looking at a meadow covered by fog. She looked ethereal as the moonlight got caught in her hair. It smoothed the crinkled fabric of her shirt, her hands still wrapped tightly around the sleeves. The light revealed the watery eyes she had been trying to conceal, threatening to spill any second.
Rio took a tentative step forward and reached to press her fingers lightly to Agatha’s back.
“Sweetheart?”
Agatha jumped slightly, quickly wiping her cheeks before turning to face Rio.
“What now? Can’t I just get a moment of peace?” Agatha snapped, trying to sound annoyed but her quivering voice gave her away. Her hands shook slightly, showing how hard she was trying to keep herself together.
Rio stayed silent as she wrapped her arms around Agatha in a hug. She pressed her close, her hand stroking her hair. It was slightly tangled, but she just ran her fingers through the knots, careful not to tug too hard. They stayed like that for a long time.
Rio could hear Agatha’s occasional sobs and felt how her silent tears started to soak through Rio’s shirt and hair. After some time—minutes, or hours, Rio couldn’t tell—when Agatha’s breathing had evened out and her crying had turned into quiet sniffling, Rio finally detached herself from her.
She took in the other woman's appearance. Her eyes were slightly red and dried tracks glistened on her cheeks, but otherwise you wouldn’t have even known she’d just been crying. Rio took Agatha’s face into her hands, softly wiping away the tracks. She was as beautiful as the day they’d met.
Agatha’s gaze slowly took in every detail of Rio’s face before her eyes fell on her lips. Rio seemed to notice and smiled softly.
“Sweetheart, you okay?” Rio murmured, her smile turning into a smirk as she saw how the other's face under her hands started to turn faintly red.
Agatha glanced away, seemingly embarrassed at being caught, but a small smile formed on her face. She didn’t step back, instead moving to be slightly closer to Rio. She leaned in as if to kiss her, and she probably would have if Rio hadn’t chosen that moment to speak.
“Agatha, we need to talk,” she whispered, her lips almost touching Agatha’s with how close they were.
“Can’t it wait?”
Rio’s smile had turned sad once more as she slid her hands to Agatha’s wrists, and pointedly looked to them. Once, years ago, they had been in a similar situation. That time, Rio had agreed to wait, and she would forever regret it. She never wanted to experience that pain again. Agatha’s face fell the moment she realized, and suddenly ripped herself out of Rio’s arms, stepping away from her with an exasperated expression.
“Agatha, please. I need to know that you're all right,” Rio said with a pleading note in her voice. Agatha huffed, stepping closer to Rio once more.
“Are you still hung up on that? I quit years ago; you know that.”
“I know, but — “
“But what, Rio?” Agatha snapped, starting to walk away, “Don’t try to pretend you still care. We both know you stopped doing that a long time ago.”
Rio was left standing there alone, with a slightly stricken look. Distantly, she could hear the others laughing and talking around the fire, and she knew she should probably return to them before their disappearance would spark conversation.
Returning to the clearing, Agatha tried her best to act as if nothing had happened, even as Lilia shot her a few knowing looks that Agatha pretended not to see. At some point, Teen had joined them, returning her coat to her.
The conversation died down once again, as Agatha heard footsteps behind her. Rio plopped down next to her, but Agatha didn’t even spear her a glance. Deep down, she knew she had been wrong, but her pride wouldn’t allow her to say it.
Everyone could sense the tension between the two witches, but nobody seemed comfortable enough to address it. After the awkward silence seemed to have settled, someone suggested they try and get some sleep. Everyone agreed.
Lilia and Jennifer moved a few paces further, continuing a quiet conversation for a bit before eventually settling down to sleep. Alice, who didn’t want to leave Teen alone, insisted she occupy him in the small shelter Agatha had built. Agatha was thankful she’d said it since she didn’t think she had it in herself.
She and Rio were once again left alone. The once crackling fire had died, and only a few smoking sticks were left. There was quiet all around them.
Agatha let out a breath she hadn’t noticed she’d been keeping and staggered up. She walked over to a big oak tree, only a few paces away from the log she had previously been sitting on. There was dark moss growing around it, and she hoped it wouldn’t be too wet as she sat down and tucked her coat better around herself.
Agatha leaned on the trunk, closing her eyes. One of the things that Agatha hated was sleeping, specifically, falling asleep, alone. She hated being left alone, with only her mind for company. And to no one's shock, her mind was terrible company.
She could hear Rio flipping her knife, a mindless action she’d long since learned to tune out, but this time no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t block the sound from her mind.
Her thoughts also kept wandering back to earlier, to the edge of the meadow, where Rio had stroked her hair and let her cry on her shoulder. Now looking back on it, she wasn’t even sure why she had been crying. There were so many reasons for her to cry that if she wanted to, she could probably cry for the rest of her life.
Her son, her power, her coven, her mother, the love she had once experienced only for it to be ripped away from her, life, death, Rio… The list could go on, but Agatha chose not to think of it.
Whilst she had been drowning in her thoughts, she’d dozed off. As a leaf rustled next to her, she immediately snapped awake. Next to her, Rio froze, a slightly guilty smile forming on her face. Clearing her throat, she sat down next to her.
“You looked cold.”
Agatha silently turned her back to her.
That single movement might have been enough to break Rio’s black heart into a thousand pieces once more. Rio leaned her back on the tree, turning her gaze to the dark, starless sky.
She stayed that way long after Agatha’s breathing had evened out and she’d fallen still. Long enough that she considered going to sleep herself, just to pass the time. It had been so still and silent for the past hours that the tiniest movement snapped her out of her daze.
Agatha shifted in her sleep next to her, which was unusual since she usually slept like the dead. Rio glanced at her, finding her face tense with an unsettled expression.
Rio sat up and unconsciously shuffled closer to Agatha. Her knee brushed lightly against Agatha’s thigh, an insignificant movement, but just the thing that alerted Agatha. As if possessed, Agatha’s eyes snapped open with a gasp. She jumped forward, tackling Rio to the ground.
It took Rio a couple of seconds to grasp the situation, but once she did it was easy for her to overpower Agatha, who was still drowsy from sleep and the nightmare she had surely just woken up from. It was the only explanation for this sort of reaction, and it wouldn’t be the first time.
They struggled for a moment before Rio managed to roll them over, so she was on top of Agatha, pinning her arms and torso down with her legs. She used her hand to cover Agatha’s mouth and pressed her head down into the ground, making sure she wouldn’t scream and attract the others’ attention.
Her knife had almost automatically materialized in her hand, and she had reflexively brought it to the other’s throat. Agatha’s eyes were wild, and Rio knew there wasn’t much else she could do but wait until Agatha snapped back to reality. She had one too many times woken up to Agatha – accidentally – trying to kill her, and at one point had worked out that keeping her pinned helped her calm down the best.
Of course, that had been decades ago, but she hoped it would work now. She didn’t want to wake the others up with a screaming and crazed Agatha and was sure Agatha herself felt much the same.
“It’s okay sweetheart. It’s okay,” Rio whispered stroking her face with her thumb. They had landed close to the charred wood, the faint smell of smoke and ash still wafting in the air.
After a minute or so of Agatha struggling and Rio keeping her pinned down, she started to regain her mind. She blinked several times until clarity snapped back and she finally stopped fighting Rio.
“You good? Not going to try to kill me if I let you up?”
Agatha rolled her eyes in annoyance but nodded the best she could with Rio still keeping her head pinned. Swiftly, Rio withdrew her hands and sat back. Agatha panted a little before shooting an irritated scowl at Rio.
“Was that necessary?” she asked, voice a little hoarse from sleep.
Rio smiled her best lunatic smile before shooting back,” Well, some of us don’t want to get our eyes clawed out in the middle of the night by a sleep-deprived witch.”
Agatha’s eyes darkened a bit as she finally understood the situation.
“Ah. Sorry about that, but it seems you handled it pretty well since you still have both of your eyes. Unfortunately,” she adds the last part like an afterthought after looking Rio up and down.
Realizing that she was still in Agatha’s lap, Rio felt a blush start to creep up her face. Coughing, she quickly got to her feet and pulled Agatha up.
“Sorry about that.”
Agatha looked at her for a while before smiling, “Don’t be. I didn’t mind. Anyway, we should probably wake the others and continue.”
Rio nodded dazedly, her mind focused on the way Agatha flipped her hair over her shoulder and straightened her collar, pulling her shirt down just an inch.
Only when they’d once again started walking, did Rio’s mind truly catch up with what Agatha had said.