Work Text:
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [8:20] : Good morning. We need to have a meeting at once; however, I will be extremely busy today, so I'm afraid it will not be in-person this time. I am trying to figure out the video-call function so we may all partake in a virtual meeting.
Klavier Gavin [8:20]: hallooo
Klavier Gavin [8:21]: do you need help? i can start a call
Prosecutor Blackquill [8:21]: Morning.
Prosecutor Payne [8:22]: Does anybody know how to use the speech thing on the phone question Mark send text Enter send the text phone do
Klavier Gavin [8:22]: hahaha
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth started a call that lasted 2 seconds
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [8:23]: Can everyone get on the video-call? I don't have much time.
Klavier Gavin [8:23]: you ended it. do you want me to start another one?
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [8:23]: No need, Prosecutor Gavin. Give me a minute.
Klavier Gavin sent a picture.
Klavier Gavin sent a picture.
Klavier Gavin sent a picture.
Klavier Gavin [8:25]: from my show last night :)
Prosecutor Blackquill [8:25]: Silence. Nobody asked for those.
Prosecutor Payne [8:26]: How do I participate in the call Send text send it God
Prosecutor Blackquill [8:27]: Quit speaking nonsense.
Klavier Gavin started a call
Klavier Gavin [8:28]: everyone get on that call
Klavier Gavin [8:29]: um hallo
Klavier Gavin ended the call
Klavier Gavin [8:31]: hallooo???
Klavier Gavin [8:31]: herr edgeworth i can start another one so we can all get on it and have the meeting
Prosecutor Payne [8:33]: Where is the call question mark no I said question mark? Send a
Klavier Gavin [8:33]: IT ENDED!!!
Klavier Gavin [8:34]: @Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth are we having the meeting now? i can just start one like i did before
Klavier Gavin [8:34]: or if you want to do it, press the button that has a video camera in it
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [8:38]: I must go now, I apologize. The meeting will have to wait until this evening, after all.
Klavier Gavin [8:38]: okay good luck
Klavier Gavin [8:39]: let’s play a game in the meantime. or do you all also have trials today
Klavier Gavin [8:39]: kiss marry kill defense attorneys
Prosecutor Blackquill [8:40]: Shut your bloody mouth.
Klavier Gavin [8:40]: rude. no wonder you're already graying
Klavier Gavin [8:41]: >:(
Prosecutor Payne [8:44]: Hello Hello has the meeting started yet? question Mark oh it did it right the first time No I didn't mean to write that Stop send it Jesus Christ
Klavier Gavin [8:45]: no call until this afternoon.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:13]: Good evening. Allow me to apologize once again for leaving the chat conversation hastily this morning.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:13]: I must inform you that, unfortunately, Maya Fey has been accused of murder again. This, evidently, will be the topic of our upcoming meeting. It is of paramount importance to figure out who is going to prosecute the case, since I will not be able to.
Prosecutor Blackquill [16:14]: I surmised as much. Wright-dono was sitting with his head in his hands, moping, on the stairs of the courthouse at 8 in the morning.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:15]: In any case, the virtual meeting will begin in fifteen minutes, at 16:30 . Does that time work for everyone?
Klavier Gavin [16:15]: fräulein fey being framed for murder again? she thinks she's my brother or something haha
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:16]: That is extremely inappropriate, Prosecutor Gavin. Moreover, this is a work group chat, so try to write more formally.
Klavier Gavin [16:17]: Sorry, Mr. Edgeworth.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:17]: … Besides, every prosecutor should have been added to the group chat by now, isn't that right? Then why are people missing?
Klavier Gavin [16:18]: I did add everyone when I made the gc idk
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:18]: Even Franziska?
Klavier Gavin [16:18]: Ja, but I think she left
Klavier Gavin [16:19]: I’ll add her again
Klavier Gavin added Franziska von Karma
Franziska von Karma left
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:20]: What just happened?
Klavier Gavin [16:20]: she left again lol
Klavier Gavin [16:20]: I mean, she left again, Mr. Edgeworth.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:21]: Hmph. What about Prosecutor Sahdmadhi?
Klavier Gavin [16:21]: I don’t know who that is
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:23]: Forget it, I will handle it. For now, every person in this chat must confirm their attendance to the upcoming meeting right this minute. I need everyone to participate.
Klavier Gavin [16:23]: i'll be there
Prosecutor Blackquill [16:23]: …
Prosecutor Payne [16:24]: Good after noon start again delete Good afternoon everyone, I will be attending the meeting period Send it
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:24]: Mr. Payne… Pray tell, is there a reason you have been sending witless, incoherent messages all day?
Klavier Gavin [16:25]: he's talking to the phone and it types out what he says, but he doesn't know how to use the function correctly apparently
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:25]: Please, quit doing that at once. I'm getting a headache.
Prosecutor Payne [16:27]: I sincerely apologize Mr. Edging Worth I’m not fond of typing because my fingers are to big for the keyboard period. Period I cannot stand these new technologies Now
Klavier Gavin [16:27]: edging worth HAHAHA
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:28]: I do not care for that joke. And Prosecutor Payne, either word your messages mindfully or don’t bother speaking at all.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:28]: The virtual meeting will begin in a minute. Quit jesting around and sending irrelevant messages.
Klavier Gavin [16:30]: do you want me to start the call??
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:30]: No need. I went to Detective Skye for guidance this morning, and she taught me how to do it.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth sent a picture
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:31]: That appears to be a picture of me taken via web camera without my consent. I did not mean to send that. Delete it from your computers.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth started a call
Klavier Gavin [16:31]: achtung baby! let's hit it!
Klavier Gavin [16:32]: or not. our mics are turned off @Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth
Prosecutor Payne [16:32]: I apologize profusely Mister Edgeworth what’s wrong with my phone Where do I find this meeting?
Klavier Gavin [16:32]: it should say meeting started at the top of the screen. you have to press that
Prosecutor Payne [16:32]: I am lost
Klavier Gavin [16:33]: not my problem
Prosecutor Blackquill [16:33]: I see your Steel Samurai figurine in the background, Edgeworth-dono… I, too, enjoy watching series that portray the honorable samurai lifestyle. Woefully, I can't say I've had the chance to finish that one. I was halfway through with it when I got thrown in the nick.
Klavier Gavin [16:33]: mr. edgeworth you have all of our mics muted so we can't talk
Klavier Gavin [16:33]: you keep asking if we can hear you but we don't have permission to talk
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:33]: Yes, you do. Just talk.
Klavier Gavin [16:34]: i meant
Klavier Gavin [16:34]: oh mein gott. you have to give us the option to turn on our mics. or why dont you let me start the call. please
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:35]: Why are there only three people (including me) on the video-call, and why aren't any of you talking?
Klavier Gavin [16:35]: do you see me waving
Klavier Gavin [16:35]: im trying to signal you to read the chat
Klavier Gavin [16:36]: my hair looks amazing today. look at me everyone
Klavier Gavin [16:37]: herr blackquill is your screen frozen or are you just eerily still
Klavier Gavin [16:37]: anyway in the meantime... guitar haul baby! let’s rock!
Prosecutor Blackquill [16:37]: Sit back down.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth ended the call
Klavier Gavin [16:39]: neinnn :( i was in the middle of my guitar haul
Prosecutor Blackquill [16:40]: You were performing for no audience but your pompous self anyway.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:41]: I was able to locate Prosecutor Sahdmandhi, who is currently in Khura’in. He isn’t carrying his computer with him, therefore he is going to the nearest library so he can use one of theirs. We shall have another meeting in about fifteen minutes. This time, Prosecutor Gavin, you may do the honors. Start a video-call when I tell you, please.
Klavier Gavin [16:42]: you got it, Mr. Edgeworth
Klavier Gavin [16:42]: let's play who do we think will end up being the prosecutor in fräulein fey’s 10th murder trial
Klavier Gavin [16:42]: personally, i'd like to give it a go
Prosecutor Blackquill [16:43]: Somebody ought to tie your hands behind your back and gag you so you can't type nor talk.
Klavier Gavin [16:43]: this is a workplace group chat. hardly the time or place for obscene talk, herr blackquill
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth added Prosecutor Sahdmandhi
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:50]: Did I do it correctly?
Klavier Gavin [16:50]: ja you did
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [16:51]: Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth, I thank you for allowing me to take part in your online meeting. To prepare for it, I did some research on virtual calls, group chats, and other online spaces as soon as I arrived at the library. And I regret to inform everyone that I have encountered… problems that might hinder my participation in the meeting.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:51]: What seems to be the issue, Prosecutor Sahdmadhi?
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [16:52]: For starters, this computer I am using does not account for a microphone, so I won’t be able to talk, only type.
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [16:53]: Moreover, I don’t believe this useless piece of junk is even capable of allowing me to join an online meeting. It is so slow I can barely type.
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [16:54]: And its keyboard is missing the letter .
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [16:54]: I cannot type it.
Klavier Gavin [16:54]: describe the letter
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [16:55]: The third one in the word for the hideous yellow cars you Americans use when you are in need of a chauffeur.
Klavier Gavin [16:55]: ohh is it the X?
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [16:55]: It is.
Klavier Gavin [16:55]: wait, that was fun, let’s play another guessing game
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [16:56]: I don’t think I’ve had the displeasure of talking to you before, Prosecutor Gavin. I am a very busy man, after all, so it’s only natural this is the first I have heard about you.
Prosecutor Blackquill [16:56]: Lucky you.
Klavier Gavin [16:56]: “the displeasure”???
Klavier Gavin [16:56]: i’ll have you know i’m a renowned prosecutor as well as a fantastic singer. have you heard of The Gavinners? My Boyfriend Is The Prosecution's Witness? Guilty Love?
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:57]: If everyone, save Franziska, is here, perhaps we could begin the virtual meeting at once.
Klavier Gavin [16:57]: say the word and i’ll start the call
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:58]: And just what is “the word”?
Klavier Gavin [16:58]: it's… LET'S ROCK!
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [16:58]: That is two words. Two unprofessional words, at that.
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [16:59]: Pathetic. Prosecutor Gavin, I am seeing it; in another life, you will be reincarnated as naked mole-rat.
Prosecutor Blackquill [16:59]: Ha ha ha ha
Klavier Gavin [16:59]: a what??
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:00]: I suggest you live this one life of yours to the fullest. It is as good as it’s going to get for you.
Klavier Gavin started a call
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:00]: Bloody hell, what is that noise?
Klavier Gavin [17:00]: what’s with all that noise i can’t hear anybody
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:00]: What is that maddening noise?!
Klavier Gavin [17:00]: i can’t even hear myself
Klavier Gavin [17:00]: it’s coming from mr. live laugh hate’s computer
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:01]: Prosecutor Sahdmadhi? I was under the impression that you had no access to a microphone.
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:01]: What is the meaning of this…? I don’t see a microphone, what’s more, I haven’t even spoken. I merely connected my earbuds to the computer.
Klavier Gavin [17:01]: turn off your mic!!!
Prosecutor Blackquill left the call
Klavier Gavin [17:01]: a library can’t possibly be that loud mein gott where are those noises coming from??
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:02]: I don’t hear anything. Surely you are all jesting. Is this one of those hidden camera pranks?
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:02]: That is enough. How do I leave this virtual call?
Klavier Gavin ended the call
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:02]: Are all of you still here?
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:02]: …
Klavier Gavin [17:03]: what on earth was that
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:03]: Why did the meeting end so abruptly? I could hear you just fine with the earbuds I brought from home.
Klavier Gavin [17:03]: the earbuds you brought from HELL. i don’t even have words to describe how terrible your audio sounded. you just desecrated my ears
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:04]: I’m with Gavin-dono on that one.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:04]: I believe I said that was enough of that. Clearly, we won’t be able to carry on with this virtual meeting.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:05]: Our efforts have proven fruitless and I can’t waste any more time. We will have the conversation via chat, even though I consider that to be awfully unprofessional.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:06]: Nevertheless, let’s begin. As I already told you before, Maya Fey has been accused of murder. Wright is understandably worried sick, and I need the prosecution to handle everything respectfully and professionally.
Klavier Gavin [17:06]: I already said that I’d like to take the case, Mr. Edgeworth
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:06]: Hm. I reckon the Chief Prosecutor called for a respectful and professional individual, not an etremely bothersome and childish one.
Klavier Gavin [17:07]: etremely
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:07]: This is what I was referring to. I will not be mocked by the likes of you. It is not my fault the keyboard is missing the letter .
Klavier Gavin [17:07]: go on?
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:08]: ……..
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:08]: Ha. Never argue with fools… They will take you down to their level and beat you with experience.
Klavier Gavin [17:08]: who is that phrase from because i know you didn’t just come up with it on the spot
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:09]: Does that matter? I will take Mrs. Fey’s case. End of discussion.
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:09]: Did the Chief Prosecutor tell you that? I don’t think so, unless this piece of junk the library employees like to call a computer is deleting messages now.
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:10]: I, as a humble servant of the Holy Mother, am the only one who can hold a respectful last rite for the victim, and assure the truth be found.
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:10]: I already told you time ago in court, Prosecutor Sad Monk.
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:10]: I don’t give two flips about your beliefs. Edgeworth-dono has the last word, and unless my computer is also deleting messages, he hasn’t suggested you are the only one who can handle this case, either.
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:11]: Humble yourself at once.
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:11]: Satorha. Naturally, you can’t handle this case, for a man who likes to play defense attorney from time to time can never be a decent prosecutor. You make a mockery of this case and the prosecutor’s office in its entirety.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:11]: …
Klavier Gavin [17:12]: herr edgeworth, are you seriously going to pick either of them?
Klavier Gavin [17:12]: so immature. what a shame >:(
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:12]: You are right, Prosecutor Gavin.
Klavier Gavin [17:12]: thank you. send me the case files and fill me in asap, i’ll get straight to work!
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:13]: Franziska is, unfortunately, unable to take the case as she’s overseas at the moment, therefore I am assigning it to Prosecutor Payne.
Klavier Gavin [17:13]: wait what
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:13]: I haven’t the slightest idea who that is.
Klavier Gavin [17:13]: he can’t even get in a call let alone text correctly
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:13]: Preposterous…
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:14]: He couldn’t even bother attending the meeting.
Klavier Gavin [17:14]: his hearing in both ears is still intact. i’d call that a lack of commitment on his behalf
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:14]: He is not even responding. How discourteous.
Prosecutor Sahdmadhi [17:14]: Will somebody tell me who this Prosecutor Payne is?
Klavier Gavin [17:14]: herr edgeworth is offline i believe
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:15]: …
Klavier Gavin [17:15]: does anybody want to go out tonight? drinks on me
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:15]: … What the hell, sure.
Klavier Gavin [17:15]: 8:30 good?
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:15]: am or pm?
Klavier Gavin [17:16]: turns out herr blackquill’s got jokes
Klavier Gavin [17:16]: unfunny ones, but still. i commend you for trying
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:16]: 8:45 pm works better for me, if it’s not a bother.
Klavier Gavin [17:16]: you’re coming too, herr edgeworth?
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:16]: … How could I ever refuse your generous offer, Prosecutor Gavin? I won’t say no to free drinks.
Chief Prosecutor Edgeworth [17:17]: Just this once, though. As I deem it impolite to decline.
Klavier Gavin [17:17]: of course… :)
Prosecutor Blackquill [17:17]: May I suggest Whet Soba for our outing?
Prosecutor Payne [17:17]: Hello When is the meeting question mark. Send