Archive of Our Own

Jeongin thought he adapted pretty well to being dead. Of course, he wasn’t technically dead-dead, most dead people didn’t still walk around after all but considering how he had met his end he thought he was doing pretty well most of the time.

It all started when he was 20 and had just moved to Seoul to study educational sciences. He had never lived alone before and his family was so far away but he was determined to make it work. His mother was reluctant to let him go but gave in when he promised he would call her at least once every week, more often if he could, and would visit on every break. The first few weeks were hard. University was so different to school. He also wasn’t used to getting food for himself, leading to him buying cup ramyeon in bulk so he’d at least have one warm meal every day. He found himself struggling to connect to the other university students, he had always had the same friend group since elementary school, apparently he was incredibly awkward when meeting new people. While he wasn’t the most social person and pretty introverted, he found himself incredibly lonely in his first semester.
Luckily, this changed in his second semester in winter of the same year.

He was late for one of his classes, entering the full lecture hall and accidentally interrupting the professor as he clumsily made his way to the nearest free seat.
Jeongin opened his laptop and tried to follow the lecture but ended up taking only a few notes that raised more questions in his head than they actually answered. He glanced over to the young man sitting next to him whose diligent, organized notes filled multiple pages of an expensive-looking, leatherbound notebook. When the lecture finally ended, he gathered his courage and decided to stop the young man before he left.

“Um, hey sorry to bother you…” He awkwardly mumbled as he got up, fortunately catching the young man’s attention so he didn’t have to repeat himself.

“Yes?” He asked.

“I was wondering if you could share your notes with me.” He started before quickly adding “But don’t think I’m one of those who just leech off others’ notes and not do any work themselves. It’s just that my alarm clock ran out of batteries this morning and I missed my bus and then the next bus was delayed and-”

“It’s okay, I understand.” He said, sitting down again and opening his notes again and sliding the notebook over to Jeongin.

“Thank you so much, I promise it’s not going to be a habit.” Jeongin said with a relieved sigh and took out his phone to take pictures of the relevant pages.

“This almost looks more like a study guide than notes taken during a lecture. How are you doing that? My notes always end up looking really messy…” He commented as he quickly skimmed over the writing.

The young man just shrugged, “I don’t know, I guess I have a lot of practice filtering out what’s important.”

“I’m jealous, I wish I could do that but I always end up writing down everything and in the end I don’t remember what’s actually relevant for the exam…”

“I could show you how to take more efficient notes.” The other suggested.

“Really? You would do that?” Jeongin asked with wide eyes. He hadn’t had a study buddy or something similar before, he’d been too shy to ask to join study groups in his first semester.

“Sure, why not? I’m Kim Seungmin, what’s your name?”

“Oh, Yang Jeongin. I’m 20 years old this year.”

“Looks like I’m a bit older than you.” Seungmin said with a cheeky smile. Of course, at that point Jeongin didn’t know yet that that was quite the understatement.

Seungmin looked at his watch, “Sorry, I have to go now, are you here on Friday evening? How about we meet in front of this building at 7?” He suggested.

“Yes, I should be free then. Thank you Seungmin-hyung!” Jeongin agreed and bowed slightly in his seat.

“See you then.” Seungmin said and left the lecture hall.
Jeongin couldn’t believe how easy it had been talking to another student in his lecture and asking for help. He didn’t want to get too optimistic but he felt like this could be the start of a friendship.

Jeongin really tried to be punctual to their study date but it seemed like the entire public transport system decided to conspire against him. Seungmin was already waiting for him when he finally arrived, slightly out of breath from running the last meters.

“I’m so sorry. I hope you didn’t have to wait too long.” He gasped out through heavy breaths.

"No, not at all.” Seungmin shook his head, “There is a café nearby that is open pretty late, we can go there if you want.”

Jeongin agreed and soon after was seated in said café, drinking an iced americano and listening intently to Seungmin explaining how he took notes. Seungmin even answered Jeongin’s questions about the lecture he missed half of the other day. 

“You’re a great teacher, Seungmin-hyung. Your future students are so lucky.” Jeongin commented after a while, prompting a slightly confused look from Seungmin.

“What do you mean ‘future students’?” He asked.

“I mean, well, you’re also studying to become a teacher right?” Jeongin tried clarifying hesitantly.

“Oh, no I’m not a student, I’m an auditor. I have another job, I’m only taking some university classes because I think they’re interesting, not to get a degree.” Seungmin explained.

“You don’t even have to sit an exam in this course and you still take so many notes?”

“I like to learn and I can remember things more easily when I write them down.” He said.

Jeongin was so impressed that he didn’t even know what to say. He struggled being this diligent with his studies without having a full-time job on top.

“You should close your mouth or a bug will fly in.” Seungmin commented.

He hadn’t even realized his mouth was open.
“Sorry, it’s just cool that you can do that while also having a job.” He quickly said but Seungmin just waved it off.

“No need to apologize. Now let’s get back to this. Do you have any more questions?”

It didn’t take long for it to become a routine that they would meet up on Friday evenings with Seungmin helping Jeongin revise what they had learned in their lecture that week. If there wasn’t that much to go over they just started talking about more personal things. He learned that Seungmin was working as a server in a nightclub, not something he would have expected considering his whole demeanor. He seemed so calm, collected and intellectual. Jeongin expected him to work in a lab, or maybe in an office job but he could see how his friendly, polite disposition could be useful as a server. Seungmin even invited him to the club but Jeongin wasn’t sure if he should follow the invitation. He’d never been to a nightclub before, what was he even supposed to do there? He didn’t like dancing, he’d just bump into people around him. He didn’t really drink alcohol since coming to Seoul, he just didn’t see the appeal to drink alone. Of course, Seungmin would be there but he couldn’t drink on the job and also didn’t have the time to keep Jeongin company when he also had to serve people drinks. It just sounded anxiety inducing. He just told Seungmin that he wanted to wait until the end of the semester to go out like that, though he would probably go home to his family during his break.
He didn’t think that he would visit the club sooner than he would have liked.

Jeongin felt so stupid for falling asleep at a bus stop but he was just so tired after working on an essay the previous night and even though it was so cold, his new winter coat was incredibly cozy and warm. When he woke up, his feet felt like they were about to fall off from the cold and his face was a bit numb.
He didn’t know what time it was but it was definitely late as absolutely no other soul was at the usually busy bus stop anymore. He slowly pulled out his phone from his pocket just to see that the battery was dead.
He cursed quietly, his bus ticket was on his phone, he couldn’t drive home like that. Of course, this was also the day he’d left his wallet at home.
His apartment was pretty far away but he didn’t really have a choice but to walk home.
After walking for a while, he started recognizing the neighborhood he was in. The nightclub was somewhere nearby, he wondered if Seungmin was there today, maybe he could go there and warm up a little before continuing his way home. 

It was so cold and dark, there weren’t a lot of people around anymore. It was the middle of the week after all, most people had to work early tomorrow.
If his phone hadn’t died he would have listened to some music on the way, and he probably wouldn’t have heard the footsteps behind him. But then, if his phone hadn’t died he wouldn’t have even been in this part of the city, he would have just called a taxi.
But those were only hypotheticals, Jeongin couldn’t change the situation he was in right now.
There were footsteps behind him, closely behind him.

He tried telling himself that there was no reason to be nervous, Seoul was a big city, this was probably just another one of the millions of people living here who was walking home.
No need to be nervous, no need for his heart beating so quickly, no need to be so scared.
He sped up a bit, if this person was just behind him by coincidence he would just get some distance between them and there would be no problem, but the steps behind him also sped up.
Should he turn around and face this person? Ask if they were following him? What would…

He couldn’t finish his thought when the person behind him grabbed his shoulder and pushed him in a narrow alley between two buildings. His back hit a wall as a bald man with tattoos grabbed the front of his coat and held him there. There was a sharp prick on Jeongin’s cheek as the man held a knife against it.
“Give me your wallet.” He said.

Jeongin couldn’t believe this was happening to him. Something like this had never happened to him before. He’d heard horror stories about gangs shaking down unsuspecting students but he’d never imagined this happening to him.
“Don’t make me repeat myself, kid. Wallet. Now.”

“I-I don’t have it with me. Please I don’t have anything.” He begged.

“You want me to believe that?” The man let go of his coat and put his hand in his pockets, trying to feel for a wallet. He pulled out Jeongin’s phone, looked at it for a second and pocketed it himself before going through Jeongin’s other pocket where he just found a package of tissues.

“Backpack.” He ordered gruffly, giving him enough space for Jeongin to take off his bag.

Shakily, Jeongin complied and handed him the bag.
Suddenly, there was a loud clanging behind the mugger, making them both flinch as a cat jumped out of a trash can and ran away.
Jeongin tried to do the same and used the chance to push past the man and escape. He didn’t come very far as the man tripped him up and caught him again.

“Can’t let anyone know about this. You know how it is.” The man muttered in his ear before Jeongin felt pain bloom in his chest. He looked down just to see the knife sticking out of him. He dropped to the ground when the man pulled the knife out and let go of him.

“Nothing personal, kid.” He heard the man say as he picked up Jeongin’s backpack and disappeared.

Every breath was absolute agony and didn’t even seem to properly reach his lungs.
He wasn’t sure if the temperature was dropping even further or if it was his own body slowly cooling down as his own blood soaked his coat, but he refused to die.
He couldn’t die. He couldn’t do that to his parents, who were so scared to let him go to this big city all alone. Not so close to Christmas.
He didn’t even know how he did it but he slowly pulled himself forwards, crawling out of the alley. If he could find anyone maybe they could help him but his voice died in his throat so he just had to keep crawling.
Neon lights came into his vision, he immediately recognized them as his only way of survival. It couldn’t have been hours that he took to get there but it felt like that. The lights had been turned off by the time he reached the door of the establishment but nobody had come out so somebody still had to be there.
Black spots filled his sight as he saw the door open, he was too tired to lift his head so he could only see black boots stopping in front of him.
The person lifted him up with ease and brought him inside.
“Chan-hyung!” He heard a familiar voice yell. It was the last thing he heard before passing out.

There was a strange taste on his tongue, like licking 100-won-coins, a liquid was filling his mouth while there was a pressure on his throat, coaxing him to swallow the strange liquid.

Waking up was a surprise to him. The last thing he remembered was bleeding out while also choking on his own blood out on the street but now he found himself in a cozy bed. His first thoughts should probably have been “How did I get here?” or “Where am I?”, maybe “What happened?” but the only thing in his mind was “I’m hungry.”
He heard the door open but he didn’t want to open his eyes yet, he was too warm and comfortable.

“Hey. Are you awake, fledgling?” Jeongin didn’t know the voice but it was comforting like drinking hot chocolate on a cold winter’s day. He didn’t really know what the word ‘fledgling’ meant but he somehow knew he meant him.
He just groaned in reply, pushing his face into the pillow.
The mattress shifted as the stranger sat on the edge of the bed. There was a heavenly scent filling Jeongin’s nose. He lifted his head towards the smell as the stranger pulled him towards him. Something was placed against his mouth, the scent now accompanied by equally good taste as he slowly drank the liquid entering his mouth. He felt his hunger fading and energy returning to him.
He finally opened his eyes to see a handsome young man with a square jaw and big nose looking down at him. The thing in his mouth was the man’s wrist as Jeongin realized he was drinking blood flowing from an open wound.
Now that he felt more coherent he flinched away from the man, scrambling over the bed and promptly falling off the other side.
“Who are you? Where am I? What’s happening?”

The man stood up and lifted his hands in a non-threatening manner.

“Calm down, my name is Chan. I’m a friend of Seungmin.” He explained, his voice low and controlled but still weirdly loud and hurting in Jeongin’s ears.

“Seungmin-hyung?” Jeongin didn’t know what he had to do with this.

“I know you must be really confused. Give me a minute to explain, okay?”

Something in Jeongin wanted to listen to him but a bigger part was scared and wanted to cling to familiarity.
“Get Seungmin-hyung, I want him to explain.” He demanded. He didn’t want to talk to this stranger, he wanted his friend, his only friend in this big city.

“Of course, I’ll go get him.” Chan said and slowly left the room again.

Jeongin kept sitting on the floor and waited while trying to make any sense of the situation until Seungmin arrived.
It didn’t even take a full minute until there was a knock on the door, startling Jeongin with the sheer volume. The door opened and Seungmin slipped into the room.

“Hey, Jeongin-ah.” He greeted him quietly.

He was glad to see him, it meant this Chan person had told him the truth.
“What’s happening, Seungmin-hyung? Where am I?”

“You’re at my house. What is the last thing you remember?”

“I was on my way home and there was this man and… he stabbed me. I was trying to get help but… I don’t know… I thought I was dying.”

“Chan-hyung and I found you outside of the club when we were closing up. You were losing a lot of blood and the knife punctured your lungs…”

“Then what am I doing here? Shouldn’t I be at a hospital or something?”

“Well, it’s a bit hard to explain but you did actually die.” Seungmin said carefully.

Jeongin just looked at him, confused. While his hyung did make jokes sometimes and messed with him playfully, this didn’t feel the same. If this was a joke, it was uncharacteristically malicious.
“Look, I think it’s easier to not beat around the bush too much. I’m a vampire, and when we found you and you were dying, I asked Chan-hyung to turn you.”
It was a lot to process but it also explained a lot as hard to believe as it was.
He just woke up drinking someone’s blood and he didn’t feel the stab wound anymore.

“I’m a vampire?” He asked, still not believing it quite.
“This is a joke, right? Please tell me you hid a camera here somewhere.”

He waited for Seungmin to crack a smile and confirm this. Instead, his eyes suddenly turned red and when he opened his mouth it wasn’t to smile but to show him two sharp fangs growing out of his gums, validating the absolutely insane story he’d just told him.

Overall, he was grateful that Chan and Seungmin had saved him. He didn’t want to die and being a vampire wasn’t too bad. The other members of the coven were nice enough and he quickly grew closer to Chan and Seungmin specifically. He wasn’t a big fan of how physically close everyone was with each other but luckily all of them quickly realized that he didn’t like being cuddled most of the time and left him alone. The only one he really cuddled with was Chan and only after feeding because he always got incredibly tired afterwards and just fell asleep in the same position he’d been in to drink his sire’s blood.
The downsides of course were that he couldn’t go back to university, which saddened him but he was still hoping to at least attend some evening classes as soon as he got his hunger under control like Seungmin did. Getting his degree though was probably off the table, but he tried not thinking too much about that.
What hit him harder was when Christmas was nearing two weeks after he woke up as a vampire.

“I’m sorry, Jeongin, but you can’t go home like that…” Chan said when found Jeongin packing his bag.

“What? Why not?” He asked.

His sire looked at him with big sad eyes.
“You’re still a fledgling, if you lose control… It’s too dangerous.” He tried to explain.

“But, my family… I wouldn’t hurt my family.” Jeongin insisted.

Chan sighed, “I believe that you don’t want to hurt them but young vampires like you sometimes do things they regret later. Seungmin told me how close you are with them but if you go home you will endanger them.”
He hated it but he knew Chan was probably right. He hadn’t seen them in a few months but if seeing them meant hurting them he had to stay away.

“Will I ever see them again?” He asked, scared of the answer. He hadn’t heard anyone else talk about their family since he was here, but he also didn’t know if their families were even still alive.

“Of course, fledgling. As soon as you can control yourself around blood, I promise you can visit them.” Chan said so sincerely that Jeongin just had to believe him.
So Jeongin had a goal in mind now at least.

Over the next year, Jeongin had learned to be around humans as long as they weren’t openly bleeding. He even started working at the club with the others. Chan had called it exposure therapy. If he was around so many humans every night, he would eventually learn to ignore the call of blood. Of course, there was always one of his hyungs with him just in case something happened so they could stop him. He had told his parents that he’d gotten a part time job and they didn’t need to support him financially anymore but he’d omitted the part of him dropping university. He just didn’t know how to tell them. He also had to find so many excuses why he couldn’t visit them, and why they couldn’t come to Seoul to see him. He told them he was sick, he had to pick up extra shifts, he had some deadlines he had to focus on. He was sick of lying to them but he didn’t know what else to do. He thought he was getting better at resisting blood…
And then Chan met Felix and it was because of Jeongin that the latter had found out about them. Of course, Chan planned to tell him sooner or later but he’d probably preferred a softer approach. Not Jeongin ripping someone’s throat out in a dark alley, making Felix think they were deranged serial killers and he was next.

They were lucky Felix apparently was a saint and accepted them even after a rather harsh start.
It was hard not to like Felix. He was incredibly funny and endlessly kind, he even shared his blood with Jisung when he got hurt and needed it to heal. They were all shocked when Chan, Minho, Hyunjin and Changbin emerged from the hunter’s basement with his lifeless body. Jeongin could feel Chan’s emotional anguish over the sire bond, even after Minho revealed that he had given Felix his blood and that he would come back.

So, Jeongin really liked Felix, which made him even worse when another ugly emotion reared its head inside of him.
Seungmin had already gotten along with Felix before he became a vampire, and after, when the latter also moved in with them, they seemed to grow even closer, playing video games together, they tried cooking together, which ended up horribly but they still seemed to have a lot of fun, and they started joking around more. Jeongin knew it was stupid that he felt jealous. Seungmin was the only one aside from Chan that Jeongin sometimes liked to cuddle with, not often but sometimes. Felix was a very physical person and maybe Seungmin liked that more than the comfortable distance he had with Jeongin.

Jeongin was overall just confused by his own emotions. Why was he jealous? It wasn’t like he and Seungmin were together, they were merely friends.
If any of his friends back home were in the same situation, Jeongin would have guessed they had a crush but that couldn’t be the case for him. He didn’t do ‘crushes’. He’d never had one before and he didn’t see the appeal in romantic relationships. He didn’t want to kiss anyone or god-forbid sleep with them, he shuddered at the thought alone. He didn’t even like hugs that much, cuddling wasn’t his thing. But these last two things he found himself not minding them if Seungmin were to ask him. But Seungmin didn’t ask because he knew Jeongin didn’t like it. He was considerate like that.
So Jeongin stuck with the conclusion that he didn’t have a crush, this was something else, for now.

Half a year after Felix had joined them, they had started taking him to the club regularly. He wasn’t ready to work there yet, he was too tense around humans still but they had to start somewhere. He was spending most of his time in the vip room upstairs or at the bar with Chan, pressing close to his boyfriend to inhale his scent instead of the humans’ around him.
This evening, Chan had to deal with some manager business so Seungmin was on fledgling-sitting duty for a few hours. Jisung should have been watching Jeongin while working at a bar but was unfortunately a bit distracted watching Minho dancing with some guy that would probably end up as his meal later. Jeongin didn’t mind, he was fine most of the time, it was unlikely someone would just randomly start bleeding here.
Unlikely, but not impossible. And of course today was one of those days.
They heard a glass shatter before the smell of blood reached their noses. Jeongin tensed up immediately, hunger immediately setting in even though he’d just fed last night.

Next to him, he heard a groan from Seungmin who had a tight grip on Felix’s shoulder, trying to push him over to the staff-only room but their newest fledgling wasn’t budging.
Jeongin saw as Felix’s hands came up to push past Seungmin, probably trying to break something in the process so he wouldn’t stand between him and his meal. Before Jeongin could even think about it he had grabbed Felix’s arms so he couldn’t attack Seungmin.
Seungmin looked at him surprised, Jisung came up behind him ready, way too late if Jeongin had decided to attack that poor girl that had cut her hand on the broken glass. Minho was probably already looking after her and dressing her wounds.
Together, Seungmin and Jeongin managed to bring Felix to the back where Chan was already waiting for them to calm his boyfriend down.

“Are you okay?” He asked Jeongin, eyeing him skeptically.

“I think so…” Jeongin muttered, thinking about his own reaction.

Seungmin patted his back, “You did so well out there.”

“Great, we’ll talk later, okay?” Chan said, picking up a struggling Felix and carrying him to his office.

Jeongin looked at Seungmin, “Does that mean…?”

He smiled at him, “You can probably see your family soon.”
His smile evoked so many feelings in Jeongin. He felt weirdly proud that Seungmin was proud of him.
He awkwardly shuffled closer to him and hoped Seungmin would understand what he meant. 

Luckily, his best friend sometimes seemed to be able to read his mind as he slowly pulled Jeongin into a hug.
“Good job, Innie. You did great.”

A few weeks later, after a few more tests if Jeongin was really ready and the night in the club wasn’t just a fluke, he could finally pack his bag for real this time. He’d already called his mom to tell her he would come home for a few days. She’d been overjoyed when she heard she was seeing her dear son again after more than two years and immediately offered to prepare his childhood bedroom for him. He longed to sleep there again but he unfortunately had to decline. His parents’ apartment wasn’t protected against the sun like the coven’s. He could only meet his parents after the sun had gone down and would otherwise need to stay  in a hotel. Nervous excitement buzzed under his skin, it was almost impossible to contain. Chan offered to come with him and he gladly accepted. Maybe it was because of the supernatural connection to his sire, maybe it was just because Chan was such a calm, stable presence in his life and he’d just learned how to control his hunger. There was a small fearful part of him that wanted Chan there in case something happened and someone had to stop him from attacking his family.
He also asked Seungmin to come with him, he wanted his best friend to be close, and show his family what a great friend he’d made in the city. He wanted to show Seungmin the city he grew up in, there was also a firework festival planned that weekend and he knew the perfect spot to watch the spectacle. It was a sight to behold and he knew Seungmin would like it, that’s why he asked him to come. There was definitely no other reason.

“When are you coming back?” Felix asked Chan as he clung to him and the older vampire was peppering him with good-bye kisses.

“Monday night, I promise.” Chan said between kisses.

They were so disgustingly adorable, Jeongin couldn’t help but roll his eyes slightly. They were only gone for one extended weekend, but they were acting like Chan was leaving for war. They’ve been saying goodbye for almost an hour now.

“Channie-hyung! Come on, we want to get to the hotel before we have to pay the late-check-in fee!” Seungmin called him from the garage.

“Okay, guys, Minho is in charge. If anything happens, call me and I’ll be right back, okay?” Chan said after one last kiss to Felix’s temple.

“We know, we know. Have fun, okay?” Minho waved him off and peeled a clingy Felix off of Chan.

Before Chan could start another way too long series of goodbyes, Jeongin grabbed his arm and pulled him towards the garage.

“We will! Thank you, Minho-hyung!”
Finally, they got into the car and started their little journey.

They drove for a couple of hours. His parents didn’t live that far away but still far enough for short visits to me impractical.

“So, I didn’t really tell my parents that I dropped out of university, or that I’m working in a nightclub…” Jeongin confessed on the way.

“We can tell them we know each other from taking classes with you if you want to. For Seungmin that’s actually true.” Chan suggested.

“I don’t know. I hate lying to them but I don’t know what I’m supposed to say to them. I dropped out because I died and turned into a vampire isn’t really the best explanation even if it’s the truth…”

“What if you tell them that you took a break to find yourself because you don’t know if you want to be a teacher anymore?” Seungmin asked from the backseat.

“I don’t know if they’d accept that. They were so proud that one of their sons was accepted to Seoul University, they’d probably think I’ve wasted my chance…”

“From what you’ve told me, your parents seemed really nice. Are you sure?” He sounded a bit worried.

“My parents are nice, they just can be a bit old-fashioned. A job in a nightclub is definitely not something they’d expected for one of their kids…”

“If they are old-fashioned, they should get along great with Channie-hyung.”
Chan looked at Seungmin through the rear mirror.
“You know. Because he’s old.” Seungmin finished his sentence with a grin.

Jeongin couldn’t suppress a small laugh when Chan just sighed. The joke was overused as Seungmin mentioned Chan’s age whenever he got the chance, still, his commitment to the bit was what made it still funny.
“We’ll figure it out, you still have until tomorrow evening to think of something.” Chan brought them back to the actual topic.

“Don’t worry, Innie. Everything’s going to be okay.” Seungmin patted his arm before leaning back in his seat. Jeongin couldn’t help but touch the spot, he didn’t know why his face felt a bit hot.

They checked into the hotel way too late. The night receptionist was polite but couldn’t hide a little bit of annoyance as she showed them to their rooms.
Jeongin was just unpacking his clothes when there was a quiet knock on his door. He wondered if it was Seungmin who wanted to wait out the sun together but when he opened the door, it was Chan who stood on the other side.

“Hey, I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. Did you remember to close the blackout curtains?” He asked.

Jeongin’s eyes widened, he actually hadn’t done that yet.
“Oh, you’re right. Come in, Channie-hyung.” He said as he walked to the windows and pulled the curtains close.

Chan entered the room and shut the door behind himself.
“Are you planning to sleep?”

“Maybe, I haven’t in a while. I was going to ask Seungminnie-hyung to watch some movies with me.”

“That’s good. And you’re not hungry?”

“Not more than usual?” Jeongin was a bit confused by the questions. Did he seem like he was struggling? Sure, he was pretty nervous at the thought of seeing his parents again but overall he was fine.

Chan laughed self-deprecatingly, “Sorry, I don’t mean to be overbearing, it's just… I guess I just want everything for you to go well tomorrow. You’ve been waiting for so long. And I wasn’t there for you as much as I could have lately…”

“Well yes, but you were looking after Felix-hyung.” Jeongin said. He wasn’t angry at Chan for not spending more time with him. He was neither a little kid nor a vulnerable fledgling anymore. And Chan was sometimes a bit too cuddly for his liking so Felix being there keeping his attention on him wasn’t that bad. Yet, he also wondered why it didn’t bother him that much when Felix spent time with Chan compared to Seungmin but put off the thought again. It was just common sense that Chan spent more time with his boyfriend than Jeongin, he had no right to be jealous of that. And Jeongin thought of himself as pretty rational. That was the difference, obviously.

“And you’re okay with that? I… I try not to use our sire bond like that too much but I was getting some rather negative emotions from you, and I got worried.”

It was so embarrassing, he knew Chan could sometimes feel what he was feeling. Chan almost never commented on it, his feelings were Jeongin’s own business and he respected that, but there wasn’t an off switch to that ability.
Jeongin felt his face flush for the second time that night.
“It’s nothing. It’s stupid, you don’t have to worry about me, really.” He stammered as he hid his face in his hands.

“Alright, but if you ever need someone to talk to, you know you can come to me, right?”

Jeongin could only nod as he felt too embarrassed to say anything.
Chan luckily got the hint and made his way to the door.

“I’m right down the hall if you need anything.”
As soon as he left Jeongin let himself fall on his bed, face pressed into the pillow to hide from the world when his little bout of self-hatred was interrupted by another knock. For a second, he feared that Chan had returned but he still got up and shuffled over to the door.

“Channie-hyung, I’m really fi-” He said when opening the door, revealing Seungmin instead of Chan.

“Not Channie-hyung, just me. Want to watch a movie and play some cards until we can finally go outside?” He asked, holding up a pack of cards.
Jeongin moved aside to let him in, slightly stunned that Seungmin had had the same idea as him, but then again, they did spend a lot of time together, of course they would think similarly, they were best friends after all.

They’d watched two movies and played some cards when Jeongin felt himself getting tired after all. He didn’t notice that he was falling asleep until he woke up a few hours later.

“Hey, are you awake, Innie?” His pillow asked, “The sun is setting, we’ll probably leave soon and still need to get ready.”
Jeongin’s tired mind needed a second to catch up, as he blinked his eyes open to find that he was resting his head on Seungmin’s shoulder.

As soon as he realized this, he awkwardly flinched away and created some distance between them.
“Uh, sorry. Umm, I’m going to shower and get dressed.” He quickly said and disappeared into the bathroom before Seungmin could say anything else.

He stood under the shower for so long, if they were at home Chan probably would have started complaining about the water bill. Seungmin had probably sat there with him for so long because he didn’t want to wake him up, how annoying. He just hoped that Seungmin wasn’t upset with him, not that he was someone to easily get upset, but Jeongin still worried.
When he couldn’t stall any longer in the bathroom and he finally got dressed, he saw a message from Chan that he and Seungmin were waiting for him in the lobby.
On the way to the restaurant, they went over what they are going to tell his parents one last time.

They rounded the corner, revealing his mother and father who were already waiting for them in front of the restaurant.
“Jeongin-ah!” His mother exclaimed and ran up to him and pulled him into a strong hug.

“Hey, mom. Ah , you’re crushing me…”

“I haven’t seen my baby in so long, so let me crush you for just another second.” She said before letting go of him.
“Oh, what did you do to your hair?” She asked, immediately fussing over him. Since he’d last seen her he’d dyed his hair a light reddish-brown color.

“I just wanted to change it up a little.” He laughed sheepishly. He knew his mother wasn’t the biggest fan of dyed hair.

“Oh,” she coughed slightly, “It’s… it’s just so unfamiliar… but it suits you. It really does, dear.” She backtracked but Jeongin knew she was only saying it to not hurt his feelings.

Jeongin’s father caught up to his wife, “Let the boy breathe, he’s just arrived. How are you, son?” He said, holding out his hand towards him that he slowly shook.

“I’m good. I’m happy to be home.” He answered.

“And you brought friends with you. I have to say when you said you were bringing someone with you, your mother and I were hoping you would introduce us to a girl.” His father commented jokingly.

Jeongin laughed awkwardly, “Dad… don’t say that…”

“It’s nice to meet you, I’m Bang Chan.” Chan tried to break up the awkwardness.
“Kim Seungmin.” Seungmin followed his lead.

“It’s nice to meet you too. We should probably go inside, we can continue to talk there.” His mother said, taking her husband’s arm as they entered the restaurant.

“I am so happy to see you again, you’ve had such a rough couple of years, my dear. How are your studies after so many bouts of illness?” His mother asked after they had sat down and ordered their food.

“Actually, there is something I need to tell you.” Jeongin said nervously. Seungmin and he had come up with a story earlier today, and he really hoped his parents would accept it.

“What is it?” His father asked.

“I, umm, I had to drop out of university because whatever I have is a chronic problem and can flare up from time to time…”

“You dropped out?” He could hear the disappointment in his father’s voice.

“Why didn’t you tell us? About this and being sick. What did the doctor say exactly? Did they tell you to give up your studies?” His mother bombarded him with questions.

“I didn’t want you to worry. It was something about stress causing the flare ups, and the coursework was causing me a lot of stress, so… you know…” He knew he was a bad liar but he just hoped that his parents were even worse at sussing out the truth.

“Then what are you doing now? You said you have a job?”

Jeongin thought that if he really had an illness related to stress it would definitely be triggered right now. He was fidgeting with his hands under the table until Seungmin leaned slightly forward and inconspicuously placed his own hand on Jeongin’s. The calming pressure helped Jeongin find his words again.

“I have a job, I’m actually working for Chan-hyung.” He said vaguely.

“And what do you do, Chan-ssi?” His father turned his attention towards his sire.

“I own a business, Jeongin is a diligent worker and I’m happy to have him.” Chan answered very diplomatically, not giving them too much information while also hyping up Jeongin.
His parents threw each other quick glances.

Their food finally came, interrupting the conversation shortly.
There was an awkward silence as they all started eating.

“The food is pretty good.” Seungmin commented, trying to break the silence.

“We’ve been coming here for years now, since even before Jeongin-ah’s brother was born.” His mother explained curtly.

“You have an older brother? You never told me.” Seungmin looked at Jeongin a bit surprised.

“We’re not really close.” Jeongin said.

“Jihun is working in an office managing finances, Jeongin-ah if you want to start an internship at his company he can probably put in a good word for you.” His father suggested.

“No, dad… I just told you I have a job and I really like working there.”

“I hope you’re not trying to steal one of my best employees.” Chan said, laughing to disguise a sudden surge of possessiveness, but Jeongin knew that his sire didn’t like where this conversation was heading.

“Of course not, but you can’t blame me for wanting my son to find work closer to home.” Jeongin’s father also laughed, more tensely than Chan.

The rest of their dinner was equally awkward, Jeongin was relieved when they finished and it came to who was paying.
“I got it.” Jeongin quickly said, taking out his wallet before anyone else could say anything.

He wanted to show his parents that he was doing well, that they didn’t have to worry about him.
When they left the restaurant, his mom grabbed his arm.

“Dear, can we talk to you before you go?” She asked, shortly looking at Seungmin and Chan, “Alone?”

Jeongin looked at his friends, not knowing what to say. He liked their company, it had helped him stay calm during dinner.
“It’s okay, we’ll go ahead. You know the way to the hotel right?” Chan said.

Jeongin nodded, he knew they wouldn’t completely abandon him. They would probably stay right out of ear-shot to not listen in on a private conversation, but close enough to hear when someone raised their voice.
When they were gone, Jeongin’s mother pulled him close again.

“Oh my baby, are you safe?” She asked, confusing Jeongin about the whole situation.

“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” He asked, completely lost on what prompted this question.

His father cleared his throat, “If you’re in danger, please tell us. We can help you.”

“What? What’s this about?”

“Honey, you won’t tell us what exactly your line of work is now, just that you work for this man ‘who owns a business’ and that you’re making really good money. To bring your boss to meet your parents isn’t exactly normal. If you’re involved in some… shady business dealings, please tell us.” His mother had tears in her eyes.

Jeongin was too stunned to say anything at first.
“You think I’m doing something illegal?” He asked. It technically wasn’t wrong. He did have quite some blood on his hands by now but this was actually unrelated to how he made his money, Chan was just paying his staff really well. They also all had access to the coven’s joined account additionally.

“Are you saying you’re not?” His mother asked.

“No, I’m not. Chan-hyung owns a legitimate business and I work for him. I just… I didn’t tell you because it’s… it’s a nightclub.” He confessed.

“Honey, you wanted to be a teacher once, you wanted to work with kids. Don’t you strive for a more reputable occupation?” His mother seemed so disappointed.

“This is a reputable occupation. People change, mom. I like this job.”

“We are just worried about you. You’ve been so distant the last few years, you barely call anymore and now that we see you again you seem so different.” His father put his hand on Jeongin’s shoulder but he brushed him off and took a step back.

“Did you stop to think that maybe I was scared of what you would think? You were already hesitant to let me go to university to become a teacher, you always wanted me to go into finance like Jihun, work in an office, marry and give you some grandkids, but that just isn’t me.”

“And now you are one of those young men earning money by going on fake dates with women in clubs!” His mother exclaimed desperately.

“What? Do you think I’m a host at a host club? I’m a bartender, mom!”

“How do I know you’re not lying to me? You’ve been doing that for so many months now!”

“I’m not lying. I was so excited to see you two again, why can’t we just talk about other things?”

“But this is important. We’re just worried.”

“You don’t have to worry about me though. I’m doing well, why can’t you see that?”

“Jeongin-ah…” His mother started but he didn’t feel like talking anymore, he could feel his gums itching, his fangs reacting to his agitation. It was only a matter of time until his eyes would turn red.
“I’m going back to my hotel…” He muttered and quickly turned around, walking away quickly to catch up with Seungmin and Chan.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Chan asked when Jeongin met back up with them.
Of course, his sire would know that he wasn’t feeling good.

“I don’t know…” He answered honestly.

“The night is still young, do you want to show us around a bit and take your mind off of things?” Seungmin suggested.
That sounded better than talking about his family at the moment.

“Are you hungry? Your eyes are red.” Chan reached out but stopped himself before touching him without permission.

“I’m not, I just need to calm down a bit…” Jeongin was glad there weren’t that many people around them right now to see his eyes.

Chan quickly rummaged through his coat pockets and pulled out a pair of sunglasses. Jeongin didn’t even know why he owned a pair, it wasn’t like they were going out in the sun a lot.
“They are Lix’s, he left them in there months ago and I forgot to take them out…” He explained as if he was able to read Jeongin’s mind. Something he couldn’t do as far as he knew, the only thing he could read were his emotions.

Jeongin took the sunglasses and put them on. He did feel a bit stupid walking around with shades in the dark but they didn’t know when his eyes would turn back again, so he had to deal with strange looks for now.

“So, what are you going to show us first?” Seungmin asked.

“My old school isn’t far from here…” Jeongin muttered. It was probably boring for them but it was the first thing that popped into his mind.

“Then let’s go.” Seungmin smiled and pushed Jeongin slightly to get him to lead the way.

It was probably the most boring sightseeing trip imaginable but Seungmin and Chan still showed interest in the frankly mundane things Jeongin showed them.
His old school, the playground he always went to with his friends, the convenience store that he’d always gone to after school, and the park on the way from his house and the school where he’d started feeding a little fox that had somehow found itself in the city until it hadn’t shown up again one day.

They got back to the hotel early in the morning, Chan left for his room to call Felix after making sure Jeongin was okay, while Seungmin decided to stay with him a little longer.
“Do you have any plans for tomorrow night?” He asked.

Jeongin was still a bit distracted from talking to his parents, so he just looked at Seungmin, “Why?”

“I saw some posters for a fireworks festival tomorrow night. Do you want to go watch?”

Jeongin buried his face in his hands. He couldn’t believe he forgot about that.

“Everything okay? We don’t have to go if you don’t want to…”

“No, that’s not it… I wanted to ask you to go with me but I forgot.” Jeongin admitted with a groan.

Seungmin couldn’t help himself but laugh.
“Great, so I guess that’s a yes.”

His hand came up and patted Jeongin’s hair, careful not to put too much pressure on him so he could stop him if he wanted. But he didn’t want to. The touch was light and comfortable. He didn’t look up for quite a while as Seungmin continued.

His head was so warm he felt like his face would permanently change color to tomato red. He really wanted to lean into Seungmin, be hugged by him, maybe even decide to sleep like that again like he did yesterday. It was so unlike him, it was scary.
He couldn’t take this anymore, he suddenly stood up, surprising Seungmin who pulled his hand away quickly.

“I need to talk to Channie-hyung.” He declared and quickly walked out of the room, down the hall towards Chan’s door. Seungmin just looked after him but luckily remained seated on the bed.

He could hear Chan talk behind the closed door but the rooms were apparently sound proof enough to turn most words into muffled, incomprehensible noise.
He knocked at the door, halting Chan’s conversation as he probably stood up and came up to the door and opened it.

“Innie? Everything alright?” He asked, surprised to see him.

“Is that Jeonginnie? Heeey!” Jeongin heard Felix’s voice through the phone in Chan’s hand.

He didn’t really know what to say except “I need your help…”

The worry was blatantly obvious in Chan’s face, “Of course, come in.”

“Lixie, can I call you back later?”

“Umm… of course. I love you.”

“I love you too!” Chan said before hanging up, leading Jeongin to sit down on the singular armchair in the room while sitting down on the bed himself.
“What happened?” He asked.

Jeongin just groaned.

“Does it have to do with your parents?”

He shook his head.
“It’s stupid.” He said quietly.

“I don’t think it can be that stupid if you’re getting so worked up about it.”

“But it is…” His face would never be its regular color again, by now he was sure of that.
He took a deep breath. He could trust Chan, whether this trust was based on their supernatural connection or on their relationship in general, he didn’t know but he also didn’t really care.
“Channie-hyung… what does it feel like to be in love?”

Chan blinked at him in surprise.
“I have to say, I didn’t expect that…”

“I told you it’s stupid, you don’t have to answer…”

“Nonono, it’s not stupid. Let me think… When you’re in love with someone, it’s different from loving your friends or family. You can’t stop thinking about them, it’s like they have taken permanent residence in your mind. When they are with you, you just feel better, like you can do anything. You can’t get enough of them, you never get tired of their presence.” There was a dopey grin on Chan’s face, Jeongin knew he was probably thinking about Felix.
“And you feel like you would do anything for them. And when they smile it makes you happy too, and their laugh is the most beautiful sound in the universe.”

“You sound ridiculous, Channie-hyung.” Jeongin said with a small laugh. Chan’s explanations sounded so cheesy and exaggerated but somehow he found them relatable.

“Well, love sometimes is a bit ridiculous and doesn’t really make sense.”

“And how do you know if the other person likes you back in the same way?”

“That’s simultaneously the easiest and the hardest part. You just have to ask them.”

That sounded horrifying, there were so many ways he could mess this up.

“Do you want to tell me who it is?” Chan asked.

He didn’t know if he did. If he admitted it out loud it would become undeniably true, but maybe Chan would be able to help him. Maybe he would tell him that Jeongin was mistaken and he didn’t actually have a crush and then all his problems would be solved and everything would go back to normal.

“It’s Seungminnie-hyung…” He mumbled.

Chan raised his eyebrows slightly.
“Really? I didn’t know you were… I mean, I didn’t know you were into guys to be honest.”

“I don’t think I am…” Jeongin thought out loud.
Chan raised his eyebrows slightly but continued to listen.
“I have never thought about another guy like this, or a girl really. I don’t think I’ve ever been in love with anyone before.”

“But you like Seungminnie?”

“He’s my best friend, but I think I like him more than that. What if he doesn’t want to be my friend anymore when I tell him?”

That was the worst case scenario. Seungmin would hate him for ruining their friendship by developing a crush and then one of them would have to move out because there would be too much tension between them to live together and then the others would also be mad at him for ripping the coven apart.

“Hey, hey, Innie. Don’t start spiraling now.” Chan snapped his fingers in front of his eyes, pulling him out of his head.
“Seungmin really likes you a lot. Remember, he was the one who convinced me to turn you to save your life, you don’t do that for just anyone.”

When he returned to his room, Seungmin was gone. He had probably returned to his own room after Jeongin had left so abruptly.
Jeongin looked at his phone and saw that Seungmin had texted him.

>I’m not sure what I did wrong earlier but if you don’t want to go look at the fireworks with me, that’s okay.

No, you didn’t do anything wrong. I was just being stupid. I want to go with you, I know a good spot to watch the show.<

>Okay, if you’re sure. Looking forward to it! ^^

Jeongin couldn’t help but smile at the message. Seungmin was always so thoughtful, always checking if he was okay. It made him feel so warm. He let himself fall into bed, not that he was tired, he’d slept a few hours earlier. He could go for some blood by now but the sun was already rising, maybe Seungmin would go out for a hunt with him before the festival.
Fortunately, the next evening came quickly and Seungmin knocked on his door a few minutes before the sun completely disappeared behind the horizon.
Jeongin had spent hours trying to pick an outfit, which was impressive considering he’d only brought a small suitcase for the weekend.

“Are you ready to go?” Seungmin asked.

“Of course. Would you mind, umm, grabbing a bite to eat before the show?” Jeongin said vaguely when he saw some other hotel guests in the hallway.

“Sure, I could go for a snack myself.” Seungmin grinned, his fangs glinting only for Jeongin to see.
“We still have an hour before the show starts, where do you want to go?”

“There are some shady clubs downtown. My parents always wanted me to keep away when I was younger, we can probably find something there…” Jeongin explained as they left the hotel.
“Lead the way.”

Jeongin’s hometown wasn’t as gigantic as Seoul but after a while they found a person they deemed scummy enough to feed from without feeling bad about it. They’d been hunting together since Jeongin had switched from Chan’s blood to actual human blood and Chan had trusted him enough to let him go out on his own. Jeongin knew that Seungmin preferred not to kill the person he was drinking from and he tried his best to respect that even though he was still not as good at stopping himself once he started drinking. When they shared one person, Seungmin always went first, only taking a little bit, and then he let Jeongin drink, stopping him before he accidentally killed someone. It was a good system that worked. In the beginning, Jeongin had tried snapping at Seungmin when he pulled him away from his meal, too caught up in his instincts to devour, but Seungmin had never held that against him. He was endlessly patient with him until he could finally manage on his own.
It was another quality Jeongin had come to love like about him.

Afterwards they finally made their way to watch the fireworks show. Jeongin led him to the big highway bridge across from the shore where the fireworks would be let off. It was quite illegal to sit where they were, right at the foot of the bridge that held it above water. He’d come here once as a teenager, dared by his friends, and he’d almost been caught. But Jeongin and Seungmin didn’t have to fear being caught, while not as good at it as Hyunjin they could wield their mind manipulating powers well enough to convince someone that they were allowed to be there if it came to it.
They sat down on the ground and looked towards the shore.

“It should start any second now.” Seungmin said after looking at his watch for a second.
There were a few centimeters between them and Jeongin wanted to get closer but then the first rocket detonated in the sky, alighting the bay in a beautiful blue. Others quickly followed, creating an explosion of color.
The sound was deafening, their sensitive ears suffering from the many blasts.

Seungmin said something that Jeongin couldn’t quite make out with the noise around them but then he pulled out two sets of ear plugs from his coat pocket and handed one to Jeongin.
Of course, he’d already thought about the noise beforehand, he was always so well prepared.
It was still loud but a lot more bearable with the ear plugs. He looked over at Seungmin again who was watching the fireworks with big eyes. His face was illuminated by the colorful spectacle, his dark eyes were mirroring the scene.

Jeongin carefully moved a bit closer until he leaned against Seungmin who without even looking put his arm around him to help him get more comfortable.
‘Seungmin really likes you a lot.’ Chan’s words echoed in his mind.
They just stayed like that until the show was over and it was hard to remember a time he’d been more comfortable. Sure, the ground was hard, the fireworks were so loud, it was pretty cold but still, Jeongin could have stayed like this for hours.

“Seungminnie-hyung, I… I want to tell you something and I don’t know what you will think about it…” He muttered after they had removed their earplugs again.

“What’s going on?” Seungmin asked, cocking his head to the side like he so often did when he was thinking about something. It always reminded Jeongin of a cute puppy.

This was the moment of truth, he couldn’t go back on it now or he would never tell him.
“I like you a lot.” He said, feeling his face heat up again.

“I like you too?” Seungmin sounded a bit confused.

“No, like… I like-like you. I think Imightbeinlovewithyou” He stumbled over his last few words, “And if you don’t feel the same that’s okay obviously but I don’t know I just never felt like this before and I feel like an idiot and I just hope we can still be friends and please just forget what I said, I-” He started rambling on until Seungmin put his hands on Jeongin’s face, cupping his cheeks.

“You sound like you expect me to reject you.” He simply stated.

“And… you won’t?”

An amused exhale escaped Seungmin’s mouth, “I also like you, I think I’ve known for a while but I didn’t think you’d reciprocate. You never seemed interested in more than friendship so I held my tongue.”

“I wasn’t until recently, I looked it up and I think… I think I might be asexual or demisexual? It’s a bit confusing. I just learned about those words but from what I’ve read I think that’s me…” He tried to explain.

“That’s okay, you don’t have to put a label on it if you're not sure. Just… I want you to know that you never have to do anything with me that makes you uncomfortable. We’ll figure this out okay?”

Jeongin wanted to cry, how did he deserve someone so understanding and kind?
“So… Do you want to be my boyfriend?” He asked hesitantly.

“I’d love nothing more.”

When they returned to the hotel, Seungmin joined Jeongin in his room again. Seungmin’s arms were around him as they just cuddled on the bed and talked about some boundaries. Jeongin was okay with cuddling even if he himself didn’t initiate it, he accepted kisses to his head but he was still a bit averse to actually kissing on the mouth, it was something they had to try when Jeongin felt more comfortable. He didn’t feel comfortable being touched in intimate areas. Seungmin fortunately also looked for more of an emotional connection than a physical one, he was pretty neutral about the idea of having sex. Of course, he had sex before and it wasn’t like he hated it, but it also wasn’t a priority for him. It was something he could live without. Their discussion seemed almost too perfect. Jeongin didn’t like sappiness but he couldn’t help but feel like they were just meant for each other.
When Jeongin’s parents called him the following day, Seungmin was there with him to hold his hand.

To his surprise, they actually apologized for making Jeongin feel like he couldn’t talk to them. While they didn’t understand the development from aspiring school teacher to barkeeper, as long as Jeongin was safe and not involved in shady business practices, they just cared about him being happy. They asked if they could travel up to Seoul to visit him soon and while Jeongin happily agreed, he just hoped Felix would get a better grasp of his instincts by then if his parents visited their home.

Seungmin asked if he wanted to tell his parents about their relationship but he was still hesitant. He wasn’t completely sure what his parents thought about same-sex relationships so he wanted to test the waters first.
As for telling the others, that decision had been taken from them quickly. Not that they would have kept it a secret but they would have preferred telling the rest of the coven themselves.

They talked to Chan before they left Jeongin’s hometown, and their lovebird of a coven leader almost immediately told his boyfriend. By the time they’d arrived home, everyone already knew about them from Felix who looked a bit sheepish that he’d been so bad at keeping it for himself for at least half a day.
The others congratulated them and Jeongin had to reinforce again that while he was comfortable cuddling with Seungmin, the others were supposed to keep at least a little bit of distance when they all wanted to come in for a big group hug.
Overall, their life didn’t change too much, Seungmin and Jeongin were just a little bit closer than before.

“I guess that means Hyunjinnie-hyung and Changbinnie-hyung are the only ones left that are not in a relationship.” Jeongin noticed when he and Seungmin were alone, cuddling on his bed one day.

Seungmin just looked at him confused.
“Innie… don’t tell me you’ve never noticed. You can’t have been… no… that was a joke right?”

Jeongin genuinely didn’t know what he meant.

“Innie, they’ve been sleeping together since even before I joined the coven.”