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Joe Biden had been going out with Donald Trunp for 5 months now and he discovered dark news yesterday afternoon after their golf date. Joe walked in the rain to Donald's apartment, solemnly looking down and preparing for the news he would deliver. He walks to Trump's door and knocks twice. Trump appears at the door in just his plaid pajama pants and T-shirt. "Hey, Joe. What's up?" Joe enters the apartment with a face that is the antithesis of Donald's casual mood.
"Hi, Donny. I need to talk to you." Donald laughs with little humor and his right eyebrow shoots up.
"You sound so serious," he says in a humorless-laugh, again. "What is it?" he says, now a little more sincere.
"I... Donny I'm pregnant." 3 beats of silence. Donald hears his partner's words and they register. Donald thinks of it and asks himself, is this good or bad? Can we raise this kid in the public eye? What will Melania think? And on the last beat Trump decides this is a positive thing and smiles. He ends the silence in celebration.
"We're gonna be parents, Joe." He smiles brightly but he expects relief on Joe's face that does not appear. "What?"
"No, it's nothing. We're gonna be parents." Joe gives an insincere smile but Donald does not notice.
Later that day Joe is texting Kamala.
Kamala
Yeah, Joe?
I'm pregnant
By who
Don't freak out
Why
Just don't freak out
Who is it, Joseph
Full name and everything. Wtv. But just say you wont freak out
I won't freak out
Trump
Trump what... omg. you're having Trump's kid???
Having is a strong word
Wdym?
I dont want it
Does Donald know????😨
No, he was excited to be a dad lol
oh, Joe. you have to tell him
I will
Joe texted Trump about meeting later and he agreed. "Hey, baby. I'm so ready to be a dad. I talked to Melania." Joe nearly choked on his drink.
"What did she say??"
"She said she didn't want me anyways, and that she was dating Kamla. But it doesn't matter. We have each other. And the baby." He smiles and blinks when he takes a sip of his coffee.
"That's the thing. I... Donald. I don't want the baby. I think I should get an abortion." He saw Trump's face drop at each word and become oranger and more wrinkly than it already was because he's old, wrinkly and a bitch.
"Out of the question."
"It's my choice."
"You know my opinion on that. It is completely unacceptable. We will have this baby. We'll be good parents, Joe," he reasoned.
"I don't want this fucking kid, Donny."
"Well you'll have it. There will be absolutely no having of abortion of my baby."
"It's my body, my choice."
"You're being unreasonable. Why don't you care about having our kid? Didn't you say you loved me? Didn't you say you wanted to be with me?"
"I do love you and want to be with you. I'm just not ready for a kid."
"You're ridiculous. See this is why I was reluctant with you. You people are just so-"
"Us people? Who? Democrats? Are you really arguing about political parties right now? Donald, you're the ridiculous one now."
"You're being dramatic and causing a scene. Just keep the baby."
"No, I'm getting an abortion whether you like it or not." Joe grabs his things to leave.
"You will not walk out on me. You leave and get that abortion, we're done."
"I guess we're done then."
Joe thought of calling Kamala that night but instead decided to call his witch bestie, Agatha. "He was being a dick," Agatha stated after Joe explained everything. "But I'm so sorry Joe, I know you really loved him. Sometimes relationships are complicated, take it from me."
"Yeah, I guess. You would know Ms. Dating Literal Death." He heard her laugh on the other end and was glad she was there for him to talk to. "I know where I need to go," he said eventually.
He parks his car in the lot of... Grey-Sloan Memorial Hospital? He thought it was called Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital. Grey? He needed to find Mer. He walked in and looked around. "Mer!" he yelled. She walked over to him and gave Joe a hug.
"It's been so long. How are you?"
"My life is messy right now. Where is Lex?" Meredith's face turned sad.
"A few months ago there was a plane crash. Lexie and Mark didn't make it."
"Oh, Mer. I'm so sorry."
"Not the first person I've lost in the past few years. But I keep going."
"At least you do. Okay well the reason I'm here, I'm pregnant."
"Congratulat-" She stopped midway through because of Joe's head shaking and asked, "What is it?"
"I'm here to get an abortion." Meredith rubbed his arm.
"Well, you've come to a good hospital. I'll take you to gyneo. Right now our head gyney is out so Arizona is heading the department. We should find Cristina."
They find Cristina on the way and she gives Joe a hug as she talks about her own abortion from Ow*n H(C)unt who is a stupid ginger bitch. "He came and he said that I killed her baby during Mer's daughter's first birthday party. It was quite the scene."
"Sounds rough."
"Us both chosing men against abortion, huh?" she laughed dryly.
"Pretty much." They prepared Joe once he got to Gyneocology.
"I'll hold your hand while it happens," Cristina says.
"Thank you, Cristina." Halfway into his abortion Cristina was there with him and he saw a looming figure in the background. "Mama, there a ginger behind you💜," Joe said. Cristina turned around in shock.
"You killed our baby!" The stupid bitch(Owen Hunt) yelled but then Kamala showed up to take him down.
"I have a glock and you are about to fall out of the coconut tree." She laughs because she is big sister general and shoots that stupid man like Gary should have at the end of season 6. Then Trump walks in but Agatha and Rio show up and Agatha kills him while singing the Ballad of the Witches Road. JD Vance happened to be there because he heard there was a couch so Cristina grabbed a scalpal and stabbed him because I hate that bitch too.
By the end of everything Joe was slightly upset because of the abortion and because Trump died but then he realized it's for the better. Joseph Biden lost something that, but he also gained something else. He lost physcially but gained something even more important: perspective. He realized something, he needs to live life while he has it with someone who really loves him, like the way Kamala loves Melania or the way Obama loves Harry Styles. So he decided, the next man he picks, he'll pick with his heart and with his head.