Archive of Our Own

Soda was crying again.

Well, he hadn’t exactly stopped for the past few days. Since Pony and Johnny went missing, and their faces were plastered in the newspaper, Soda hadn’t been sound of mind.

Ace’s theory was that it wasn’t just the fear he felt for the boys that caused his emotions to go haywire – it was everything else, too. One contributing factor was probably the explosive argument he’d had with Darry following the fight, which Ace heard involved Soda screaming so loud he’d lost some of his voice. At least, that’s what Steve told her. There was also the constant lingering fear that their social worker would come by and take Soda away, the risk only seeming more likely after the events of the past couple of days. Ace wouldn’t lie and say the same fear hadn’t plagued her thoughts since it happened – she knows Darry and the others felt the same way.

There was a lot Ace wasn’t sure about. No one knew where Dally was; she and Two had gone searching for him after everything, but he wasn’t at Bucks and had only made a single appearance at the Curtis house. Dally was gone like smoke, and for a moment, Ace was scared he’d skipped town again. However, she also knew Dally wouldn’t leave now, not while Johnny and Pony were missing. That’s how she knew he probably had something to do with it. She just hoped whatever it was, he had those two boys’ backs.

Ace was scared and tired and worried, so, because of that she’d been spending the past few days at the Curtis house. Steve had also been at their house, going to work and back with Soda, sleeping in Soda’s room with him because Soda refused to sleep in Pony’s. Ace wasn’t sure where Steve slept if Soda took the bed, but she had her suspicions. She kept them to herself.

She’d been sleeping on the couch – Darry had, painfully, offered her Pony’s room, but she’d refused when she saw the look on his face. Besides, she didn’t think she could have either. She fought for the couch, and he’d succumbed to her.

Two’s been going back and forth between his own house and theirs – Of all of the Greasers, Two had a home that meant going back didn’t mean a beating was about to follow. Instead, an emptiness lingered inside his house that replaced that fear, and sometimes, Ace knew it was just as painful.

Ace found herself alone in the Curtis house with Soda that dreadful Wednesday night when her life really hit rock bottom. At least, at the time it felt that way. She didn’t know that next Saturday it would get so much worse.

Darry and Steve had gone to buy groceries, and Two was god-knows-where. Soda had his head in his hands as he sat on the couch, shoulders going up and down as he took deep breaths. That night, Ace was lounging on the couch when he walked in silently, sat down next to Ace, and just started crying. Ace, who was never good at comforting people, sat there confused. She hadn’t been sure what Soda wanted from her. She thinks the only reason he had been willing to walk outside of his room and start crying was because Darry wasn’t home to help him, and she knew if Darry saw Soda crying again, Soda would forgive him for hitting Pony.

So, Ace just did what she assumed Soda needed. She hugged him tight and let herself be a shoulder to cry on.

It had been a few minutes of this when there was a loud, desperate knock on the door. It startled both her and Soda off each other. She and Soda shared a look, his blue eyes somehow more blue when he cried. They expressed both fear and confusion.

No one knocked on the Curtis's door. It was unlocked for a reason. Only someone who didn’t know them would have knocked.

“Do you think it’s the social worker?” Soda asked, his voice laced with fear.

Ace shook her head. “It’s 8:00 PM. The damn sun is gone already.”

The knock came again, louder, this time followed by a voice.

“Help! Please!”

Ace recognized that voice well. It was the voice of a girl she’d hung around before and had even liked the company of, even if it was all because of another girl. Bev’s friend, Marica.

“Is that–?”

Ace ran to the door before Soda could finish his question. She knew Marcia, who was a kind girl if not a bit of a pushover. Ace trusted her. She was the only one besides Two-Bit who had known about her and Bev. She’d kept that secret despite Ace’s initial distrust, and she still had kept it even after everything, after Bev started acting differently, and after she’d ended things.

And Marcia wouldn’t be here unless it was an emergency.

Ace swung open the door, and sure enough, Marcia stood there with wide, tearful eyes. Hanging off over her shoulder, so beat up Ace almost didn’t recognize him, was Two-Bit. Marica was struggling to hold most of his weight. Something in Ace’s stomach dropped at the sight.

“Soda!”

Soda was by her side in a second. His brain reacted quickly to her panic. Despite his state earlier, he kicked into gear. He replaced Marcia’s position and successfully took on most if not all of Two’s weight. Soda was taller and managed to get Two inside the house quickly. Ace could hear his whines and groans as he was quickly moved onto the couch she and Soda previously occupied.

Soda was kneeling in front of Two-Bit, looking him over diligently. Marcia stood beside Ace with tears in her eyes, her hand over her mouth. In that moment, Marcia watched Two-Bit with so much concern, that Ace remembered their interactions at the Drive-in.

Ace wanted to feel bad for her, but couldn’t. She was staring down at Two-Bit, terrified and pissed. This was her best friend, and his grin and smile were gone, replaced by a grimace and a whimper every time Soda touched any part of him. Ace resisted the urge to touch him herself, afraid she’d only hurt him more.

“Ace, grab the first aid,” Soda instructed.

Ace did. She ran off where she knew they kept it in the bathroom. When she returned and handed it off to Soda, she finally saw the extent of the damage done to her best friend. It enraged her.

Two-Bit had a busted lip, eye, and bruises around his neck. It looked like someone had stepped on him real hard, enough to leave a mark. He was holding his side like his life depended on it. His breathing was rapid and deep like he was trying over and over again to catch his breath.

Ace also noticed a cigarette burn on the side of his face. It was so obvious, so deliberate, a fire began to rage inside of Ace she hadn’t known was kindling to begin with.

“Ace.”

Soda was looking up at her. He had his hand out, and Ace remembered why she was sent away in the first place.

She handed him the first aid, then took a seat beside Two-Bit. Marcia sat on the other side of him, watching worriedly. Ace wanted to ask her a dozen questions, starting with why the hell she was here, but she focused on her friend instead.

“What the hell happened?” Ace asked.

Two-Bit laughed softly but winced the second he did. Ace hissed herself, fearful for her friend. He leaned his head back against the couch as he took a deep breath. Soda had handed him some pills which he’d taken without question. Tylenol, probably, either way, they went down quickly and with no hassle.

After a moment, Two finally spoke. “Socs jumped me on my way home. God, I was just walking. Never seen so many in one place, even the girls.”

Ace made eye contact with Marcia. Marcia looked down, clearly ashamed of something. At least that’s what Ace thought, but then she saw her fingers interlocked with Two-Bits. Then she also saw how Two-Bit was clutching Marcia’s hand so slightly his knuckles were almost white. Ace ignored that for now.

“This wasn’t just a jumping,” Soda said as he prepared some alcohol on gauze. “You can barely breathe, Two.”

He’d said it so sadly and quietly, Ace felt something in her chest get heavier. After all the things they’ve been through, now this? Don’t the Socs know they’ve had enough?

“They…They were out for blood,” Marcia whispered. Ace picked her head up, as did Soda. They shared a look while Marcia continued to watch Two-Bit. Her eyes were still watering, and tears dried on her face. God, if Ace wasn’t so pissed at the world, she might even feel bad for the girl.

“They’re angry, about Bob. They wanted to jump someone for revenge.” She looked down sadly, and Ace noticed her thumb rubbing over Two’s knuckle. Two just watched her, a sadness in his eyes Ace didn’t know how to read. She was starting to put two-and-two together, and she also didn’t know how she felt.

Marcia continued. “I was there when it happened and–”

“What!?” Ace said, suddenly angry at her, no longer sympathetic. Two looked at Ace, and put a hand on her shoulder. Ace calmed down as Two-Bit looked at her.

“She didn’t join them,” he said. “Swear. She stayed and helped get me back here after.”

Ace looked back at Marcia, anger in her eyes. Marcia was clearly ashamed, but Ace didn’t care about her regret. Ace was angry. She was sad. She was everything in between and more.

“Why didn’t you stop them?!”

“Ace–” Soda began but Marcia interrupted him.

“They’re four boys, what did you expect?! They would have just pushed me to the ground or worse, and Bev…”

At the mention of her name, Marcia paused. Two-But looked down, away from everyone. Ace saw Marcia’s eye flicker to the side of Two’s face, where the burn mark from the cigarette lay on his skin. Ace’s brain worked faster than she thought it could.

Bev was the one who burned Two-Bit.

Ace’s face fell. She didn’t know what to say, how to react. She felt everything all at once. Her eyes flickered from Marcia to Two-Bit, and she remembered that they both knew. They both knew everything and didn’t seem to hate Ace for it, but Ace hated herself; for allowing this to happen, for not walking with Two-Bit, for once kissing the same hands that burned her best friend. She felt rage all over again, and it was consuming her.

“Ace,” Soda said. She looked a him, almost forgetting he was in the room. Almost forgetting he had no idea. Or at least, she thought he didn’t, but the look he gave her, those sympathetic eyes that made her want to run away. Well, it made her think maybe he did.

Ace stood abruptly, and into the kitchen where she immediately started pouring some water into a glass, and downed it. She gripped the edge of the sink harshly, the voices of others behind her sounding foggy.

God, she saw those eyes in her vision the longer she kept them closed. Beautiful eyes surrounded by blond hair, the kind she used to love to run her fingers through when they were alone, when she could imagine herself as someone else, even for a fleeting moment.

Then she imagined Two-Bit looking up at those same eyes as a cigarette burned him, as a bunch of boys hurt him while a girl who was supposed to be non-threatening finished the final bowl.

She was gripping the sink so hard she thought she would break a knuckle.

“Ace?”

Ace nearly jumped out of her shoes. She forgot where she was. Marica stood behind her, her hands fidgeting with themselves. Her eyes were red, her makeup long smudged away. Her hair wasn’t so perfect, and her dress was worn and dirty. She almost resembled a greaser if Ace didn’t know her any better.

“What?” Ace said more venom in her tone than she meant. Her anger was getting the better of her, but luckily, Marcia wasn’t a weak girl.

“I’m sorry. You have to know that,” she began. Her voice found some footing, and she wasn’t speaking quietly anymore. She took a step closer to Ace, looking back and lowering her voice. “I care about him, too. You know that, right?”

Ace sighed. She did know. She knew ever since Two-Bit first laid eyes on that girl, and Marcia looked back. She thinks that’s why she wasn’t as angry as she deserved.

“I wanted to stop them, but Bev…” Marcia looked down at the mention of her name, but she shook her head and regained her composure. “Bev held me back. None of them are talking to Cherry, and I was so scared-"

"That’s not an excuse-”

“It’s not, I promise,” Marcia said. She sighed, wiping her eyes as another tear fell from her cheek. “I just meant, that’s why it took me so long. I’m done with them, I’m done with Trip. I care about Two-Bit and I know you do too.”

Ace was afraid she might start crying too. Marcia was a good person. A good girl. Someone who should be hanging around the likes of her and her friends, but Ace was feeling selfish, and she was starting to think she wouldn’t mind having a friend like Marcia.

“Beverly did that to him?” Ace asked. She knew the answer, but she needed to hear it.

Marcia took a rattled breath. She looked behind her, where Soda was dabbing the burn with an alcohol rag. Two-Bit hissed and gripped Soda’s arm, who was apologizing quietly.

Marcia looked black at Ace, nodding her head tearfully. “After, they all left. Bev wanted me to come with her and meet her at the Sycamore Bridge, but I refused. I went to him instead, and she was gone. I think…I think she’d done with me.”

Marcia looked so heartbroken over this, her face so sad. Her whole social circle was falling apart, and although Ace hated most of them she couldn't help but pity her. When everything you’ve come to know and understand suddenly crumbles under you, you can’t really see beyond the disaster that’s in front of you. Ace knew that all too well. She wasn’t glad Marcia was going through it too.

“Do you think she’s there?” Ace asked.

Marcia looked confused. “At…at the bridge?”

Ace nodded.

“I mean, maybe. But why would-”

“I'm gonna go see her. I need to talk to her.”

Marcia’s eyes widened. She got closer to Ace and lowered her voice. “Is that a good idea? You two haven’t spoken in…what, months?”

Ace nodded her head. “She stopped. I just let it happen. We’ve been needing to talk, it’s been a long time coming. This–” Ace gestured to Two-Bit, who was still on the couch as Soda tended to a cut on his face “This is my final straw.”

Marcia looked down, and it looked like she wanted to argue. After a few moments of hesitating, her face hardened, and she looked like a different girl for a moment.

“I’ll go with you.”

Ace’s eyes widened. “Marcia–”

“She was my best friend, Ace.” Ace went quiet, and the conviction in her voice sounded new, but damn if it didn’t sound strong. “I deserve a conversation too.”

Ace didn’t argue that.

Ace and Marcia went back to the living room. During that time, Two-Bit’s shirt had been removed and was being tended to by Soda, who’d grabbed a bag of frozen peas at some point. His ribs were all bruised, and the area just below where Two’s tattoo ended almost matched the color of the tattoo itself. It made Ace sick, and only angrier.

“Marcia and I will be right back.”

Both Soda and Two-Bit looked up at them.

“What?” Soda asked. “Are you serious right now? Look what just happened! What if you get jumped?”

“I’ll be with her,” Marcia said. “And besides, even a bunch of soc boys won’t jump a girl.”

“Say’s you,” Soda said. He stood up, towering above Ace, which only managed to piss her off. “Ace, don’t be stupid.”

“Don’t call me stupid,” Ace replied.

Soda rubbed his hands down his face, tired and exhausted, and Ace hated to make him more stressed, but she had her own things to take care of. “Ace, please. Stay here where it’s safe.”

“I’ll come back, I swear.”

“Ace-”

The door opened a second later. Darry and Steve both walked in with grocery bags in their hands. When they turned and saw Marcia, their faces both turned to confusion, but when they saw Two-Bit on the couch, they immediately became concerned.

“What the hell happened?” Darry asked, dropping his groceries and immediately dropping to Two-Bit's side.

Ace used this opportunity to escape. She nudged Marica as Steve started asking Soda questions. She pulled Marcia away and towards the door, but not before Marica leaned down and ran her hand through Two-Bit’s hair and softly kissed his forehead. Ace should give her credit for how quick and sly she was, because a moment later both girls were out the door before Soda could realize they were gone, and by the time they heard their names being called, they were already at the other end of the road, and out of sight from the Curtis house.

Ace walked with purpose. Marica was by her side, arms wrapped around herself as they walked the length of the east side and into the wooded creek, where Sycamore Bridge stood. The bridge was a “neutral territory” spot in the woods. Old railroad tracks sat there, and the woods themselves weren’t too thick, and the bridge was really just wooden planks over a small creek.

Ace felt flashes of nostalgia hit her as she walked through these woods. Bev used to take her here before she got herself a boyfriend. It was one of the only places they felt safe, where she could kiss her without fear that someone would find them, where they could have their most private moments. It was so special to Ace that she hadn’t been able to come back since Bev stopped talking to her, since Soc society pulled her away from Ace.

Walking here now with Marcia felt surreal. She was going to see her again, but knew this time they wouldn’t be sitting and laughing, but screaming and yelling and forcing Bev to have that conversation she’d so carefully avoided having with Ace for months now.

“She said she’d be here. She comes here to be alone sometimes,” Marcia said. Ace already knew that, but she didn’t say anything.

It was so sad how intimate both of their relationships with Bev were. Ace wondered if Bev was mourning either of them, how it felt losing both Marcia and Cherry in one night, all because she chose to live a life that would never actually accept her. At least Ace knew who she was. At least she didn’t lie to herself and hated what she saw in the mirror every night. Not anymore.

She paused in step when she saw a flash of blue. No matter what, every day, Beverly wore blue. Ever since the first say Ace met her. It paused her in step and she’d almost forgotten she was angry. The moonlight made her glow in the distance. It was a nice light. But when Ace saw the cigarette between her lips and the glow of reg and orange, she thought of Two-Bit and the burn that might even scar. She wasn’t distracted for long.

Ace sped up before Bev saw her. She didn’t wait, but heard Marcia rush to stay at her side. Ace was angry again, and she was grateful Marcia was with her. Id she wasn’t, Ave wasn’t sure what she’d do if she was with Beverely alone, whether that be good or bad. Then again, that depended on who you asked.

“Beverly!”

Bev picked her head up quickly at the sound of her voice being called. Her face fell to confusion when she saw Ace.

“Ace? What the– Marcia?”

Bev’s face turned sour. She stepped back, facing both Ace and Marcia like they were bulls. Ace wasn’t so sure if she actually felt that way. She’d learned some things about Bev over the past year, and one was that she often put up this brave front when she was actually terrified. She wondered if this was one of those times.

“What the hell are you two doing here?” she asked. She crossed her arms, leaning on one leg as the cigarette hung loosely between her fingers.

Her eyes kept glancing behind Ace, and her tapping fingers told her that Bev was worried about something.

“My friends aren’t here,” Ace said, voice venomous. “Don’t worry, they don’t beat up girls.”

Bev huffed. Her eyes went from Ace to Marcia. Marcia’s fist was clenched, and she was shaking like a small dog. Ace imagined she was both angry and scared. Based on the tension in her shoulders, and the anger in her expression, she was mad about a lot.

Bev looked at Marcia. “What do you want, traitor?”

“Traitor?” Marcia exclaimed. She unclenched her fist and took a step closer to Bev. “You’re the one who abandoned me! I was your friend, and Cherry’s!”

Bev shook her head, scoffing. Ace just watched for a moment – Marcia wanted a conversation, so Ace gave it to her.

“You chose a dirty Greaser over us!”

Ace tried not to let the comment get to her. She wondered if that’s what Bev thought of Ace, even when they were together. Did she believe that? She told Ace otherwise, she talked about how Ace was different, how she was pretty, and how much she liked her. Ace wondered if it had all been a lie, and it made her more sad than angry.

It seemed to just make Marcia angry, however.

“Leave him out of this,” Marcia said. She was no longer shaking.

“Is that not why you’re here?” Bev shot back. “Are you angry I burned your little boyfriend?”

“Yes!” Marcia exclaimed. “I care about him! He…he’s nice to me, and kind and funny and doesn’t make me feel dumb!”

“He’s a Greaser!”

“Which is what I thought you of all people would understand!”

The woods became eerily quiet after that. Bev’s front fell, and she looked sad for a moment. She took a step back, and something in Ace’s heart softened. Suddenly she remembered the scared life Beverly led. The expectation her parents had for her, the very obvious way they didn’t like Ace, but also the way Bev didn’t let that stop her from bringing Ace over.

She remembered it all. So, it seemed, did Bev.

“You…You were my best friend, and you hurt people.”

Bev’s chest was rising and falling. She was looking from Marcia to Ace. Every time she looked at Ace, she had to look away.

It took a moment for Ace to realize Marcia was crying silently. Not the sobs Ace had been accustomed to, but genuinely hurt tears that she couldn’t hold back.

Marcia shook her head as it looked like Bev was about to say something. She turned around and walked away until she could cry in relative privacy. She didn’t leave Ace’s line of sight. Ace looked back at Bev, who was doing her best to avoid Ace’s gaze.

“And you?” Bev finally said, still not looking at Ace. “You mad 'cause I made your new friend upset?”

Ace fought the urge to roll her eyes. She knew Bev was just putting up a front. Ace knew she was hurting just as much as Ace was.

“No,” she said, her voice softer than she ever allowed it to be. “I’m angry you hurt my best friend. And me.”

Bev looked at Ace, finally. For a moment, they communicated so much with so little. The history Ace had with this girl was too much to pretend like it didn’t happen. As much as Bev tried to deny it, Ace knew her, probably better than anyone else. She knew the secret parts about Bev that she refused to show anyone.

And for a moment in those woods, Ace felt like she and Bev were connected again. Bev’s angry expression fell like she was mourning something. Maybe their history, her freedom when she was with Ace, possibly Ace herself. Ace knows if she did anything for Bev, it was that she made her feel like herself.

Bev seemed to notice the change, but instead of accepting it like Ace, she scowled again, tightening her already crossed arms like they could shield her own feelings away from Ace.

“We ain’t anything anymore, Ace,” she said sternly.

Bev turned around and began walking away. Ace followed her; Marcia got her conversation, Ace deserved one of her own.

“Don’t walk away from me!”

Ace walked after Bev. She looked behind, and Marcia looked like she wanted to follow as well. Ace held her hand up, and Marcia paused, nodding her head as she stepped back. She wiped her cheeks and stood on the bridge. Ace was grateful for Marcia again.

Beverly didn’t get very far into the woods. Ace called her name a couple of times as she walked. She didn’t know where she was going this late at night. Ace groaned and ran after her, stopping her by grabbing her upper arm.

Bev turned around and let her arms fall to her side.

“Fine, what?” she asked, shaking her head. “Now that we’re alone, what the hell could we talk about?”

There was so much Ace wanted to tell her, to ask her, to yell and scream at her for. So many questions in so little time. She looked into Bev’s eyes and saw something reminiscent of the girl she once cared so much about that she would drop everything for her. A fearful part of Ace thought she still would.

“Why?” Ace said. She was leaving what exactly she was asking Bev. “I just want to know why?”

Bev didn’t respond at first, Ace thinks they both knew she wasn’t just asking about Two-Bit.

Bev looked down at her feet and sighed. She looked sad, now that they were finally alone. She rarely let down the stone walls she’d built up her entire life. Even when they’d been…whatever they had been, she never fully them down. Stolen kisses were always in the darkest parts of the world, and sly glances were always covered up with an insult from both of them. In the rare moment Bev did let those stone walls crumble, Ace thought she was given the world.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Bev said quietly almost sadly. “We can’t work, for so many reasons.”

“But you didn’t need to stop talking to me,” Ace said, taking a step forward. She tried not to let the tears threatening to spill fall. Bev wasn’t the only one who let down her walls when alone from the rest of their world. “You didn’t need to hurt Two-Bit.”

Bev looked away from Ace at that. Even in her turned-away eyes, in the way she refused to meet Ace, Ace knew. She knew in the moment what had happened wasn’t just a coincidence. She knew Bev. She knew she could be kind, and wonderful, and she could make you think you were the most important person in the world. At the same time, she also knew the best way to hurt you. She knew exactly what to say to win an argument. Beverly knew how to be cruel, and it was something she did not out of some sick desire, but necessity.

“You did it to hurt me,” Ace said, partly a question, partly a statement, mostly a realization. “I think you hurt him because you still care about me in some twisted way.”

Bev’s silence only confirmed it. She was looking at Ace now, her anger more apparent. She put her previously crossed arms at her side and took a step towards Ace. If Ace didn’t know her so well, she probably would have stepped back. She stood her ground as Bev’s angry eyes finally were at level with heres.

“They killed Bob!”

“And you almost killed my best friend!” Ace yelled back.

Bev’s anger was apparent, as was Ace’s. If Ace was the fire, Bev was the oil to her anger. It’s why what they had had been so exciting, so freeing. They didn’t expect much from the other, and never had Ace wanted to change who she was. She wished the rest of the world thought the same.

“You….you could have killed him,” Ace said, lowering her voice. Bev watched her, anger simmering on her, but at least she didn’t argue back. Ace had her ear.

“I’m sorry about Bob, I really am. I never…no one should have died.”

Ace said it truthfully. People like Dally said otherwise, and Steve and her other friends weren’t exactly all that broken up about it, but a part of Ace felt sad for him. He was not a good person, and Bob had harassed her and her friends more times than she could count, but he was still someone's son. Someone’s best friend. She thinks, even if they didn’t let on, that some of her own friends thought the same thing.

“This has all gone too far, Bev,” Ace said. Her name on her lips felt somewhat like a sin, but it felt lovely to say again without malice. “Don’t continue this stupid war. You…you deserve better than that.”

Bev’s walls crumbled. Ace knew it. She, for a moment, let go of that anger she harbored so close to her chest. The thing that protected her from her parents, society, and the expectations placed on a pretty girl like Bev. She looked at Ace with sad eyes, and Ace’s heart broke for it.

Bev’s voice went quiet, soft in a way it only ever was when they were alone in the most secret parts of their own world.

“I…I just did what they wanted, Ace.”

She looked down again, trying to hide the tear that fell down her face. Maybe out of instinct, Ace placed her hand softly on her cheek to lift her head, also covering the tear. She was surprised Bev didn’t push her away.

“Oh, Bev…Bev, you don’t need to follow them,” Ace said as Bev shook her head. “Cherry doesn’t, Marcia isn’t. I know you better than any of those Soc boys, than Brill.” Bev finally looked at Ace, and her heart soared for a moment. A memory of those times together reignited within her. What she said next, she meant with her chest.

“You can be good, Beverly.”

The woods chirped quietly at night. The sound is reminiscent of stolen kisses and moments Ace had with Bev here not long ago. She watched Bev as she thought of these moments, as she looked back at her with beautiful eyes that sometimes were blue or green depending on the light. She was staring at them when Bev leaned in and kissed Ace softly.

Ace closed her eyes too as her lips linger on hers. It was so quiet and peaceful. Ace almost tricked herself into thinking it was the past, and after she and Bev would laugh and hold hands as they watched the stars in the field past the woods, sharing more innocent kisses that meant everything to Ace.

She kissed Bev back, something she felt disgusted for but relished in. It was soft and fleeting, and it ended just like that.

Ace’s eyes were closed when Bev pulled back. Her hand had fallen from Bev’s face at a certain point, and Bev was looking at her sadly. Ace didn’t know what to think.

“Why did you do that?” Ace asked quietly, so quiet not even the woods could hear it.

“Because you’re wrong, Ace,” Bev replied. “I can never be free of this life.”

Ace’s heart broke all over again. It broke for Bev and for herself. She knew that Bev hated it secretly. Hated the life she lived, and the boys she surrounded herself with.

Ace hated them too for what they’d done to both of them. It always reminded her that they’re just girls in a world run by men, and this all started as early as the schoolyard in elementary school when they pulled their hair and called them names. Ace got as close as she could to freeing herself from that, with the clothes she wore and the company she kept. She was slowly realizing Beverly might never find that freedom.

“Bev–”

“I’m sorry,” She interrupted. She took a step back, wrapping her arms around herself, building her walls up stronger and higher this time. She had wet eyes, and Ace knew if she started crying, Ace would too. “I really am. I got to go.”

They shared one final look, a look filled with remembrance and mourning. Ace knew then it was the last time she might ever speak with Bev. The last time she’d be alone with her, the last time they’d share a kiss.

Bev walked past Ace quickly, and Ace knew she didn’t have the strength to follow or look back. She heard Marcia say Bev’s name a couple of times, but soon the sounds of her feet hitting the ground became a distant memory. Ace was left facing the woods, her hands clenched so she wouldn’t cry. She felt tears threatening to spill from her eyes. She looked up, taking in a sharp breath as if it would stop her from releasing all this pent-up emotion.

The moon was full tonight. It shined on her face brightly. She closed her eyes and basked in it.

She heard Marcia’s footsteps approach her from behind. She paused when she saw Ace, and she was grateful for her temporary silence.

“Ace?” Marcia asked quietly.

Ace opened her eyes. A cloud had covered the moon.

She looked back at Marcia, and the two were silent. Ace felt connected to Marica in a way she hadn’t connected to many people people. Marcia liked a greaser, and Ace was a greaser who had once loved a soc. Two sides of different coins.

Marcia tentatively took a step up to Ace and held out her hand. She took Ace’s hand and squeezed softly. Ace was jealous of how comfort and touch came so easily to Marcia. She was never taught how to do that.

Ace let their hands linger for a while. In the silence of the night, they walked out together, hand-in-hand, and Ace left the woods behind her.

She turned her back on them, and she didn't look back at all. She was leaving them behind along with a blond, beautiful girl named Bev.