Chapter Text
Season 2, final episode close to end
Aziraphale, deeply offended, „I don't think you understand, what I am offering you!“
Crowley looks up, murmurs, „Oh, I understand it very well. In fact I think I understand it a lot better than you.“ He turns to leave.
„You understand nothing!“ Aziraphale snaps. He hesitates, Crowley still has his foot in the air to go.
„At first I did not even want to go. I told him I want to stay on earth!“
Crowley puts his foot down and looks askant. „Why? Stay with the sushi?“
Aziraphale shouts, „You are a damned idiot!" He continues in a much smaller voice, "I did not want to … I did not want to lose you …“
Aziraphale looks down and mutters barely audible „I did not want to lose my best friend.“
Crowley watches him intensely but impassively.
Aziraphale looks up. His voice shakes a bit and he sniffs. „And now I lost him.“
Crowley quietly, „My thoughts, exactly.“ He shakes his head to get rid of this bittersweet sensation washing through him.
„So how did Mr. floating head change your mind, then?“ he inquires neutrally.
Aziraphale presses his hands together and speaks haltingly. „He knew that we … worked together in the past. He said it would be irregular for an archangel to continue that.“
„So the classical choice, friendship versus power,“ Crowley tries hard to keep his voice neutral.
„And power did win, as I can see.“ There is just a tiny quiver in his voice. Normally Aziraphale would have picked up on this, but he is too agitated to notice.
„You see nothing!“ Aziraphale takes a deep breath and continues a bit more calmly.
„He found a solution, how we could still be together. He suggested that I could restore you to full angelic status. Then the problem would be solved.“
Aziraphale looks at Crowley. „I think he somehow cares about us. And I do not understand why you can't see that.“
„Glad to hear it wasn't your idea, at least,“ Crowley spits these words out. Aziraphale is taken aback. He opens his mouth, but Crowley interrupts him.
„So Mr. floating head used your feelings towards me as bait to reel you in. And you swallowed it hook, line and sinker.“
Aziraphale is stunned and Crowley walks a few feet towards him.
„You are a goddamned idiot, Aziraphale,“ he says bitterly, but without any fervor.
„He knew of course, that I would not agree.. that I could not agree!“
Aziraphale recovers a bit and stammers, „Why? Why can't you?"
Crowley takes his glasses off and fiddles with them to win a bit of time. He normally does not do introspection. Eventually he says, „Because it invalidates everything I have been and done in the last six thousand years, I assume.“ After a pause he adds, „Anyways it would only be a matter of time, before they throw me out again. Too many questions...“
„Speaking of questions, what do they want you to do? Did you ask at least?“
Aziraphale is slightly annoyed. „Of course I did. He said great plans are afoot and that I was the right person to lead them because I knew Earth well.“
Crowley, very suspicious now, „Did you ask him what great plan?“
Aziraphale in a small voice, „They call it the Second Coming“.
Crowley bursts out, „The Second Coming! That is a euphemism for genocide! It is Arma-bloody-geddon all over again!“ He looks accusingly at Aziraphale. „You must know that!“
Aziraphale reddens, but tries to answer calmly, „As an archangel I have power. I could change things to the better! When I am on the inside I can work to avert it … to save earth …“
Crowley interrupts, „Have you forgotten, what happened to the last archangel, when he refused to start Armageddon?“
Aziraphale looks suddenly very thoughtful.
Crowley decides to bring the point home. „Gabriel has only survived because the prince of hell was helping him and because we were helping him. You will have no support from hell – they still hate your guts – and no support from a wayward angel on earth,“ he adds mockingly.
Aziraphale begins, „But if I could have you …“ – the sentence hangs unfinished between them. Aziraphale sighs and starts again, „We have been so powerful, when we hid Gabriel. And we just tried to do a very tiny half miracle. Who knows what we could achieve if we try to make a big one?“
Crowley laughs drily, „I think Mr. floating head has a very good idea what we might be able to achieve.“
He walks closer and stares at Aziraphale from a foot away. „I think that is exactly the reason why he tries to divide us.“
Aziraphale takes a step back and shakes his head.
„No! That isn't true. He offered to unite us again, in heaven!“
„Thereby neutralizing our power, presumably,“ Crowley suggests.
„What? We should be even more powerful when we are both on the same side – I think …“
Aziraphale does not seem completely convinced of what he is saying.
„Have you ever done a joint miracle with another angel?“
„Yes, oh yes. There was this coup somewhere in the Sahel zone, and I needed …“
Crowley interrupts, „So how powerful was that one? Additive? Or exponential?“
Aziraphale looks again very thoughtful. „Additive I would say.“
Aziraphale rallies, „But it could have been just Gabriel's presence. He was an archangel, after all.“
„Former archangel without his memory. There was an empty house left, with a nice character. Reminds me a bit of Muriel, actually.“
Aziraphale stares with open eyes at Crowley, „You don't mean …“
„I do. But it doesn't matter. Not now.“
The entrance doors swings open and the Metatron saunters in.
„What is keeping you, Aziraphale?“ he asks jovially. „Could you convince your friend?“
Crowley steps to the side and watches them like a hawk.
„No …,“ Aziraphale hesitates. „I need a bit more time … you said there is no rush …“
„Indeed.“
The Metatron turns to go. Aziraphale clears his throat „Could you tell me …“
„Yes?“
„About the Second Coming. It involves the end of Earth, yes?“
„Classified information, I am afraid. Certainly not to be blabbered about in front of a demon,“ the Metatron says sharply.
Aziraphale raises his hands and stammers, „I am sorry. I did not mean to …“
„Take your time, but do not take too long. The offer may be withdrawn at some point.“ The voice of the Metatron had obtained a harsh undercurrent. He glances intensely towards Crowley, turns and leaves.