Chapter Text
–Three Years Ago–
Chase peeked his head through the door to his cousin’s room. He was reading some dopey romance book on his bed. Chase took a deep breath. It’ll be fine. I can trust Deacon with this. “Deacon, can we talk?”
Deacon looked up from his book. “Oh, hey Charlie! I didn’t know you and Grandpa were here already. If you’re looking for a place to avoid my mom, you can stay in here with me. I know she’ll probably try to get you to try on all her old clothes before she donates them, and that’s a fate I wouldn’t wish on anybody.”
Chase grimaced as he sat next to Deacon. He most certainly did not feel like trying on Aunt Beth’s clothes. Today, or any other day. He cleared his throat. “I actually wanted to tell you something important, but you can’t freak out. Promise me you won’t freak out, or tell anyone, or… I don’t know. Just… promise me? Please?”
Deacon shifted on the bed to look at him, a worried expression on his face. “Woah, are you okay? Did something happen?”
Chase braced himself. This is it. You can do it. “I’m trans.” After an uncomfortable moment of silence, Chase opened his eyes and turned to face his cousin.
“Is that all? You had me worried there for a second, Charlie.”
“Wha– excuse me?? What do you mean, ‘is that all,’ this is an emotionally vulnerable moment for me, Deacon!”
Deacon shrugged. “Well sure, but come on, I may be fairly oblivious, but I’m not blind. I knew something was going on, just not what it was.”
Chase shook his head. “You’re unbelievable. How ‘bout a ‘Wow, congrats on coming out! What a brave and difficult thing to do!’ or a ‘What are your pronouns? What should I call you?’”
Deacon just rolled his eyes. “Alright then, what should I call you?”
Chase got off the bed and struck a pose. “My name is Chase Hollow, like and follow!”
“Uhh… maybe don’t do that.”
“Don’t be a hater, I need something catchy for my brand!” Chase pouted, then sat back down with a huff.
“Riiight. Anyway. Have you told anyone else?”
Chase shifted uncomfortably. “Not yet. I figured if it went poorly you’re the weakest one here besides my mom, so I could just beat you up and make you keep quiet about it. Hey, don’t look at me like that! I’m not going to do it. Anyway, I’m going to go tell my mom now, then Grandpa on our way home.”
“And what are you going to do about my parents? They aren’t going to take it well.”
Chase grabbed the other boy's collar and pulled it toward himself for emphasis. “They aren’t going to take it at all, because I am not going to tell them, and if you tell them, I’ll beat you up for real. Don’t even try me.” Deacon put his hands up in surrender.
“Yeesh, alright, relax. What should I call you in front of them then?”
Chase let go of his cousin. “Crap, uhhhh… I guess just keep calling me Charlie in front of them,” he sighed. Chase stood and started to leave, but turned back just as he opened the door. “I’m glad we had this little chat, Deacon. I doubt it’ll come down to it, but just remember that I don’t make empty threats.” The door shut behind him, leaving a stunned Deacon alone in his room.
“Man, when did sh–he get so intimidating??”
***
Chase entered his mother’s room quietly. It looked like she was sleeping, so he sat in the chair at her bedside and tried to decide on the best way to break the news to her. It wasn’t as if she had ever necessarily pushed femininity on him, at least not in the way Aunt Beth did, but Chase still worried about how she would react. Would she be upset with him? What if she thought Chase’s new name was awful? What if she disowned him? Chase sat there fretting about the possibilities until he noticed Myra stirring.
“Charlie? Is that you? How are you, darling?” She smiled up at him.
“Hey, mom. I’m doing ok. How’ve you been feeling lately?” He leaned over the bed to hug her, and she shrugged after they separated.
“Oh, you know how it is. But let’s not talk about that. Have you made any progress with that boy in your class?”
“Ah, no… not really.” Chase cleared his throat. “There’s actually something important that I want to tell you.”
“What is it darling?” Myra leaned forward and clasped his hand. “There’s nothing you can’t tell me, Charlie.”
“I’m… um, I’m tr–” Why is this so hard? Chase screwed his eyes shut. “I’m trans!” Chase’s hands trembled as he blurted out his deepest secret.
“...what does that mean?”
Chase opened his eyes and looked at her in disbelief. “Trans…gender?” He saw her expression change and rushed to explain. “It’s just, uh, I don’t really feel much like a girl, and being treated like one makes me uncomfortable. I’d rather be called Chase and have people see me as a boy.”
Myra chuckled a bit. “Oh, Charlie, no one actually ‘feels like a woman’ that’s just something people say. Gender isn’t meant to be felt, it just is.” She gestured vaguely. “You know?”
“That’s— you— what?”
“Would it really make you happier if I called you Chase?”
Chase squeezed her hand. “It would. It really would, mom.”
“Alright. I’m not sure I understand where you’re coming from, but I guess I don’t have to understand it to support you.”
Chase could feel tears running down his face. “Thank you so much.”
“What for?”
“Trying to understand me.”
Myra drew her son into a hug. “That’s what mothers are for, darling. I love you so much. Never doubt that.” They stayed like that for a couple moments, then the door opened and Aunt Beth came in to bring Myra her medications.
“Charlie, you should leave your mother to get some rest.”
Chase reluctantly got up and walked toward the door. Just before he left, Myra called out to him. “Chase, wait! Before you go, should I call you he or she?” Chase froze, one hand in a white-knuckled grip on the doorknob. The color drained from his face, and he looked back, his wide eyes meeting Beth’s icy stare.
“Charlie, what is she talking about?” Beth demanded.
Oh no.